#i have shit to do what do you mean i want to pass tf out

[queerofthedagger]

the problem with getting up early is that you're also just tired way too early?? like i got up at 8 and it's not even 10 and i'm done with the day. how do you people live like this jfc

[mwagneto]

hungarian/nomadic magyar tumblr circa 998AD dashboard simulator

🏞️ vándor-ló-979 Follow

not yall still spreading emese's foundation myth??? she literally claims she fucked a bird????? like either she's lying or she cheated and she's trying to cover it up or well. i dont even want to consider the third option

🪺 magánügyek Follow

tengri forbid women do anything???

735 notes

🦅 szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow

okay im sick of the discourse let's do this.

8,572 notes

🐎 istván-rovására Follow

that took so long lmao -> !!!!!!!∧◇ᛏ⋈∧

481 notes

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

i'm so serious rn if you support """istván""" in any way just unfollow and block me. we do NOT need him or his dumbass god and what he's been doing to our people to spread his religion is shameful.

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

btw we all know your real name is vajk stop larping as a christian it's EMBARRASSINGGGG

✝️ esztergom-örökké Follow

love seeing my mutuals reblogging this /s anyway op has multiple posts on their blog supporting quartering and human sacrifice. in case you were wondering. anyway stand with István

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

1) we dont even do human sacrifices, are you fucking stupid??? show me ONE post where i talk about that. 2) are you seriously forgetting that your bestie istván LITERALLY QUARTERED HIS UNCLE?????

#sorry to put this dumbass on the dash😭 dont even engage just block them #ur not making it up the tree of life lmao #discourse

3,264 notes

🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow

friendly reminder that just because you're white passing doesn't mean you're not a real magyar!! people with mixed parents are just as valid <3

🏇 attila-népe Follow

cranky coz ur ancestors decided to mix with the europeans arent you

🧺 lemezelő Follow

isnt your girlfriend literally frankish????

🏇 attila-népe Follow

you had to have done some serious stalking to find that💀 and first of all i didn't have a choice, my parents picked the tribe, and second of all she's not my "girlfriend" i got her via ritual kidnapping (WITH consent. before anyone gets weird)

🌐 a-kiber-kovács Follow

Couldn't you have kidnapped another magyar woman? Or someone from another mongoloid tribe?

🔅 hadúrsimp Follow

ohh sure so now human pet guy is gonna chime in to advocate for the kidnapping of our women while being lowkey racist. what are you even doing on nomadblr????

🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow

what the fuck happened to my post

19,276 notes

🪔 rakabonciás Follow

for the nth time, you're only a true shaman if you were born with teeth OR with extra fingers OR in the sac. the rest of you are faking & we can tell.

🦅szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow

okay people keep spreading this but this is literally just wrong?? like congrats on the 6 fingers op im glad u and Little Golden Father have a special connection (genuinely) but like. táltos and sámán and mágus and garabonciás and javas etc are all different things with completely different requirements and life paths which you should definitely know if you're claiming to be one?? especially since your post says shaman but you're listing the criteria for a táltos, and your username looks like a play on garabonciás so. which is it🤔 maybe get your facts in order before trying to gatekeep

anyway don't listen to op!! your connection to the Upper World is yours alone and you're the best judge of what the Fathers and Mothers want your path in life to be!!

646 notes

🛐 mea-culpa Follow

It breaks my heart that the majority of my people still refuse to see the One True God and insist on sticking to their pagan spirits. I fear that when judgement day comes, we will all be wiped out thanks to their foul godless ways.

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

how tf am i godless when i literally have dozens of gods? little mothers and little fathers are in everything all around us & it must suck ass to live in a world where you're not surrounded by the small gods that inhabit everything. manifesting that the fene and the guta tag team beat your ass tonight

🔅 hadúrsimp Follow

hadúr will literally strike op down personally. he told me himself. whispered it to me sweetly even

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

while i agree with you, i feel like you might also have ulterior motives, nomadblr user hadúrsimp

#but live your truth! doubly so on the posts of these freak repressed bible lovers. meanwhile on the #COOL side of magyarhood we walk around butt ass naked!!! op have fun never experiencing joy ever again tho #discourse

198 notes

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

posting from an alt so i don't get cancelled but lowkey i'm starting to think koppány was right.... maybe this christianity thing isn't gonna work out after all

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

WRONG BLOG

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

THIS WAS A JOKE. IGNORE THIS

🪺 magánügyek Follow

ISTVÁN????????????? 💀

[myunghology]

twisted wonderland 2nd years, except they're helplessly in love.

pairings ; riddle, ruggie, azul, jade, floyd, kalim, jamil, silver x gn! reader. (seperate).

tw ; none.. unless it's a bit too cheesy..?

a/n ; my first twst work.. im terrified!!

☆ — RiDDLE ROSEHEARTS

nope. will not allow it. he has his priority- which is his grades. he won't allow himself to be distracted by you. (more below the cut!)

but you are gorgeous tho, he'll admit that.

oh, would you look at that.. he's been distracted.

other students, even students outside heartslabyul are getting a bit weirded out, like what do you mean he's stopping in his tracks just to watch you pass by.

doesn't even notice it himself that he's staring at you. it's about time he notices that he'd stopped walking is when floyd smacked his head..

well, to be fair, he's noticed himself that he gets nervous whenever he invites you to unbirthday parties, he feels like everything has to be perfect.

—which is why some heartslabyul students are kinda annoyed when you come. only because they have to do so much with riddle pressuring them every 10 minutes. they like you generally though!

plus riddle seems more relaxed when you're around. that's just a bonus though! (is it really)

cater has multiple pictures of riddle just staring at you— his gaze softening whenever his eyes land on you instinctively.

he offers to hold open the door for you whenever you run into each other outside the classrooms, he offers to help you whenever you ever get injured playing some sport, and he even let's you borrow his notes if you were absent in class for a good reason.

sure, maybe he might be a bit arrogant, and a bit of a cry baby, and definitely strict— but he has respect for everyone. especially you.

riddle rosehearts is truly, a gentleman in a world full of boys.

☆ — RUGGiE BUCCHi

him? in love? absolutely.

if ruggie was in love, it'll probably be obvious. he tries to hide it though,, but it's clear he isn't good at that.

he's pretty chill around you though, nothing too awkward.

let me tell you this, whenever you ask him for a request, he'll want something back. no, he isn't gonna ask for a kiss or a date. stop imagining that.

he wants you to pay him back by a favor, so that he can pull the "you owe me a favor, since i did ___ for you." card.

okay maybe then he'll ask you on a date. or he'll ask you to steal something from a student.

what can i say.. it's 50/50.. slowly leaning onto the date idea though.

ruggie isn't oblivious, or stupid either. he knows when he's in love. he's just too afraid to admit it. sometimes leona makes fun of him for being a "wimp" and to just confess.

also stares at you, but in class this time. bro isn't listening at all actually because he's too busy looking at you.

maybe i will admit that ruggie is a little shit but he's actually a sweetheart when he wants to be. it's a win/win situation if you like annoying guys but has a soft spot for you.

spoiler: he eventually sucks it tf up and soon confesses.

☆ — AZUL ASHENGROTTO

azul may be a tad bit conscious about what you think about him. screw that- he's definitely conscious about what you think about him. from not only about what happened during his overblot and from his insecurities.

he knows you aren't that type of person, but he can't help it.

it makes him feel a million times better when you reassure him though. even if it's making him a bit delusional.. but then again you might be saying that just because you pity him.

"or maybe they're just nice and they actually care have you ever thought of that" - floyd

you go to monstro lounge about once a week, and for sure, azul has sent jade and floyd to take care of you well, since of couse, most of the time he's busy.

floyd almost exposed azul's crush on you once when you two were chatting, thankfully jade was there to cover his mouth before he continued speaking.

but when he is actually there face to face actually talking to you, he sounds smug but in reality, he's a nervous wreck in the inside. you obviously know that though.

wait till you tell him that you find him cute..

he explodes

no i'm joking, he's just blushing really hard. like.. too much. again- it's kinda obvious that he likes you whenever you compliment him.

☆ — JADE LEECH

so, so respectful when talking to you. still a bit teasing though. he offers to help you even if you're carrying just one thing.

always glad to see you when you're visiting monstro lounge, floyd loves you just as much, but in a platonic way! he isn't going to steal jades version of his 'shirmpy'.

tried to make a drink thats named by you, azul didn't allow it, unfortunately. (for him). i'd be embarrassed tbh.

in your opinion jade is a bit weird.. but he's still super nice to you, no matter how weird this guy seems. he would never do anything that would make you uncomfortable.

similar to riddle- he opens doors for you, sometimes offers to cook for you, and sometimes treats you whenever you're at montro lounge. only if azul allows it though, which is pretty rare. like jade wtf dym "its on the house" no it's not shut up.

you sometimes wonder if his mushrooms are safe to eat or not.

it's probably best not to ask him though.

he may or may have not tried breaking into your dorm room because you weren't attending class and you weren't responding to his messages asking where you were. it was all on concern tho don't worry i swe-

genuinely doesn't have a problem with confessing, but he only confesses until he's confident that you like him back.

trigger warning for floyd though since he's probably gonna pop out anytime soon during the confession..

☆ — FLOYD LEECH

my condolences if he ever likes you.

just kidding, it'd be pretty fun if floyd started to like you. only if you really like his bone crushing hugs.

doesn't hide his crush on you at all, you gotta be super oblivious if you don't notice it if he didn't even confess to you yet the moment he finds out that he likes you.

you're definitely scared shitless whenever you see him. when you try to run away he chases you around the halls and he's so damn fast, it's nearly impossible to escape him.

plus- his mood swings too? who knows if he'll get excited when you run away from him or if he's gonna get pissed off.. but mostly he gets excited though.

has kabedoned you one, too many times. mostly to fluster you, but also to get your attention.

easily gets jealous- especially when someone else hugs you for a long time. no one can hug his shrimpy except him! he isn't possessive, that's just how floyd is.

also stares at you in class- but throws paper airplanes at you, with the writings inside saying "HI".

ends up getting in trouble because either he got caught, or riddle snitched. most likely the second one tho.

drags you to monstro lounge to help him clean up his OWN messes, but he (might) have intentionally done this to spend time with you..

☆ — KALiM AL-ASiM

probably one of the best people ever to have a crush on you if that even makes sense..

spoils you rotten, even more than when he spoils his friends which is obviously already huge. wanna buy something online but can't? he's already asking for the link so he can buy it for you!

you obviously feel bad whenever he does this, so you try to remind him that he doesn't have to do all of this stuff for you.

not only with gifts, he spoils you rotten with affection too. you feel bad for jamil as well, he seems annoyed, but as long as kalim's happy.

very very respectful and nice to you, and will stop anything you don't want him to do anytime, he sometimes flirts with you unintentionally too..

hugs you literally at literally any chance he gets, he's also pretty clingy, if you haven't noticed that yet.

shows you off to other scarabia students, it's pretty obvious that he has a crush on you too.

bro's lovesick

gets so upset when something happens to you because of him, worries that people will try to do some crazy shit to you as well because you have a good connection with him..

introduces you to his family like you're his wife or something.. and then when you ask him what are you guys he'll go:

"are we not engaged" "NO??"

he was fully convinced that you guys were dating already

he's a little bit delusional but that's ok..

☆ — JAMiL ViPER

like riddle, jamil does not have the time to fall in love with someone since he's already busting his ass off taking care of kalim.. and with his academics too. plus the overblot situation but we don't talk about that.

maybe you are a little bit scared of him as well, but little do you know this guy will literally adjust for you anytime. it's really hard to see though when he does.

VERY hard to see that he has a crush on you though. you'd confess and he'd be like,

"i gave you so much signs what do you mean i might not like you back"

you were starstruck when you heard him say that. what does he mean signs. does he mean when he glared at you in class..? you thought you did something wrong for a second.

like floyd, kalim once almost exposed jamil for liking you accidentally.. don't get me wrong, jamil didn't tell kalim anything, he just found out himself.

jamil definitely likes you trying his culture's food, especially if he cooked it himself! it's not obvious, but he lets a small smile creep up onto his lips.

studies with you too if you're ever having a hard time. studying? nah, more like tutoring.. he's kinda harsh at first but then softens up a bit when he sees that you're really struggling.

☆ — SiLVER

im sure we all know silver is a generally pretty reserved person. and that doesn't change even when he's crushing on you.

but you do notice him stealing glances from time to time whenever you walk past him, lilia definitely asks him about that.

he may be a tad bit more open with you than others? but it's purely because he trusts you.

you sometimes tie his hair to the hairstyle called "apple hair" when he's sleeping and he doesn't notice even when he wakes up, he only notices after looking at a mirror..

genuinely doesn't mind though. lilia thinks it's adorable (he also thinks you guys are perfect for each other)

and that's why lilias opinions are always important..

generally, you guys usually talk through chat because you two don't really have the time to talk to each other physically.

but still, he still thinks you're beautiful. even if he can't see you all the time. this dynamic is kinda like a hallway crush typebeat..??

lilia is your number 1 fan alongside malleus!! sebek still has mixed feelings but he likes you generally! he just isn't sure if he likes you for silver.. or if he's not sure if he likes silver for you.. does that make sense?

after awhile he joins malleus and lilia.

©myunghology

[emmyrosee]

this is for the non curse bf!sukuna

when you first start going out he wouldn’t know what flowers to get you. he could ask you but- who tf asks their gf ‘hey what flowers do you like?’ he thinks that’s lame. so guy brings 5-6 diff flowers just for you.

can you imagine, him all tattooed and brooding buying you flowers in a pretty flower shop😭😭i’m crying :((((((

OKAY BUT IF HE DOES IT TO LIKE, ASK YOU TO BE HIS GF???

Like originally he was just going to take you out on a few dates, enjoy the company and yuuji and his Ma off his back, but that plan crumbled when he started to be the one to text you first. When he started to initiate dates. When he started to feel butterflies in his chest when you laughed.

Yuuji so graciously told him he had feelings and should cuff you before you get tired of him, and the idea swirls for a bit in Sukuna’s head before one night at four am, he storms into yuuji’s room and in a pure panic asks “how do I ask her out?”

Yuuji grumbles and throws a pillow at his brother, “flowers and candy, go back to bed.”

But Ryomen does anything but. Because there’s so many flowers and so many candies, how will he know which is your favorite? And as much as he’d love to ask you, it would ruin the surprise of being so excited at being his girlfriend that you’d have to say yes- a little manipulative, perhaps, but he’s not perfect despite what he says.

So he kinda goes… crazy.

He buys you all sorts of candy, everything from sour to chocolate, to even some cotton candy grapes and gummy bear watermelon and more candy flavored candy, all to put in a small bag that dangles from his thick wrist.

Next is the flower shop, and that’s even more stressful because how is he supposed to pick between roses and peonies and assorted and god knows what other breeds of flowers there are- one time, as a kid, he saw yuuji give a little boy a fistful of yellow dandelions, can’t he just do that?

According to the swipe of his credit card after picking out seven bouquets…. No. Apparently not.

He lugs everything out to his car with grunts of efforts, texting you telling you to be home because the smell of flowers is making him nauseous and the candy is probably melting in the warmth of the sun.

SENT please tell me you’re home?

Schnookums (god he needs to change that, why’d you ever put yourself as something so feral in his phone?) why, you coming over??

SENT no I’m making conversation

Tf

Of course that question means I’m coming over

Schnookums yayyyy okay 🥺💙

He scoffs before making a floor to your house, nerves making him speed a little too fast and almost run a few too many red lights, and he’s grateful that the cops he passed have mercy on him and let him get to your house without a ticket or handcuffs.

He gathers his bundle back in his arms and blindly makes his way up your driveway, using the sheer grace of the gods watching over him to not trip and crush everything under him. He sneezes god knows how many times, and once he’s finally at your door, he doesn’t know how long it takes him to knock successfully, but after 5 tries, he finally nails it.

And after a few short seconds, you open the door with a gasp of excitement. “What did you do!”

“I wasn’t- fuck!” The flowers start to slip as he tries to peer over them to look at you. You’re quick to make a move to help him catch them. “Fuck. God damn it. Ugh.” He clears his throat, “I wasn’t sure what flowers to get, so… I bought them all.”

“Whats in the bag?”

“An absolutely feral amount of sweets.”

You’re beaming at him, so excited between the gesture and seeing him that you immediately toss your arms around him, the crinkling of the bouquets being what snaps you back to life.

“Ah shit.”

“Sorry! Sorry!! I just… this is so sweet,” you say, smiling.

“Well, I uhh…. I wanted… you and I’ve been kinda… going out for a while….”

“Yeah?” You ask, and with the way your eyes widen and jaw slacks slightly, you know what he’s going to ask.

And he knows you’re going to make him do it.

“And I really… really have enjoyed it.” He takes a deep breath, “not sure why, but-“

“Shut up,” you snicker.

“But I kinda… want to do it. More. And… not let you do it with other people.”

“Okay,” you giggle.

“And I’m told the only way to do that is to make you my girlfr-“

“YES!” You scream, wrapping your arms around him again, and when he makes a noise of protest, you grab the flowers to put them on the ground, hugging him again tightly.

Tightly enough his organs hurt and his breath can’t get into his body, but this feels so right, so good and so comforting that he’d let you do it forever. He kisses your head and cradles it, letting the bag rest against your back.

“I can’t believe you went through all this trouble for me,” you murmur against him.

He chuckles, “don’t thank me too much yet. We still need to find vases for all of these because I’ll be damned if I let my kind gesture die within twelve hours.”

“I don’t even know if I own a vase.”

He stiffens, and you snicker in his grip.

“Well then I hope your don’t like your kitchen sink too much.”

[onelittlespiral]

You should definitely do a preppy boy tf!

FML: Contact

I knew I should have charged my phone before I left, but I was running late and didn’t want to miss my study session. I know, I know it was stupid. But the walk was only supposed to be a few blocks. I have no idea how I got this lost. It felt like I was wandering for hours, but I kept just going around in circles and ending up in front of this gym. Great, just what I needed before finals week. Maybe I should stop an- ugh. My bag spilled out in front of me as I wa a knocked to the ground.

“Hey, sorry bro.”

It seems like on about my third time around the block I finally ran into one of the gym’s patrons, idiot. For the life of me I will never know how those guys will walk out in shorts in December. I started to scoop my belongings back into my bag.

“Here, let me help- Ah fuck, that could be bad.” He picked up my laptop and handed it to me. Thankfully it seems that there wasn’t any real damage, but a few deep scratches were carved in the metal and the screen was definitely cracked.

“Just what I needed today! Look where you’re going next time!” I was nearly in tears. I was lost, I was frustrated, I think the fall tore a hole in my khakis, and now my computer would be busted till after finals.

“Hey, I said I was sorry. Didn’t mean to knock a shrimp like you down. I didn’t even hit you that hard…”

“Well sue me if I don’t have time to get swoll bro,” I spat, “but some of us have finals to study for.”

“Oh dang, that’s where I know you from! English 110, with Professor Kim. Yeah, you’re always in the front and answering shit.” Immediately the puzzle pieces clicked. I can’t blame myself for not recognizing him. He must have been one of the dudes who sat in the back, and they all basically acted, talked, and looked about the same. A bunch of gym rats struggling through the gen eds. I’m genuinely surprised he can to class often enough to recognize me. “Hey man, are you studying for this final later? I’m just like not getting this stuff. Like, why are they having Exercise Science majors out here studying English anyways?”

“Uhh, yeah maybe.” At this point I was past the point of caring about this conversation. It was such a simple class I hardly had even glanced over the study guide. I had packed my things and was making to get up and leave.

“Here bruh, lemme help you up,” and he extended his hand to me. I grabbed hold as a small shock passed between us. It was just a split second, but as his calloused, sweaty had grasped mine, I felt a jolt that stuck my hair on end. I hardly had time to notice as he hoisted me up. “Hey, if you do end up reviewing later, maybe give me a heads up. We could do a study session or something.” He pulled out a pen and scribbled on the back of a receipt. Grabbing my hand again, and pulled me into a bro hug before I could protest. Up close he was warm and humid, sweat cooling in the cold winter air. He left the paper in my hand when he pulled away. He smirked, “You should ask inside, they may be able to help. I’ll see you later tonight.” There was a confidence in his voice that sent a chill down my spine. Before I knew it he had booked it, and I was left with a piece of paper, a broken computer, and a sinking realization I was still lost.

With few options left, I popped into the gym my classmate had just come out of. Maybe they would have a charger I could borrow or be able to help me with directions. At least it was warm inside. I walked over to the man at the desk, asking “Hey, sorry to bother. Do you all have a phone charger? I am completely lost and out of juice.”

“You can bother me any time,” the attendant said with a wink, “We’ve got some chargers in the locker room, but management is struck about people using facilities without paying. You already a member with us?”

“No, do I look like a member with you all? Please, I’m tired and at this point I just need to get home.” I groaned.

“Well sorry bro, you’ve gotta get those gains somewhere… let’s see, a day pass only runs about $5,” he slid the card reader to me.

“Fine.” I thrust my card into the machine and grabbed my receipt, storming off towards the locker room.”

“Enjoy your time! Oh, sir. Those aren’t the locker rooms they are the changing ro-” and the swinging door cut him off. I cut to the first door on my left. The overhead lights activated as I walked in. The inside was warm, hotter even than the lobby. For locker rooms, there were very few lockers. Just cooler with some sports drinks, some mirrors, and a charging station. No one else was inside, so I sat down on a bench and set my phone down on the charging station. With the heat I quickly began stripping layers, till I was down to my sweater, but I was not going shirtless in this place. It looked like it would be a while before my phone would be charged. I tried to put the whole situation out of my mind as I laid back and relaxed, carried to sleep in the thick heat…

I woke up a while later, disoriented and thirsty. It may have been a bad idea to sleep in the sweater, the thing was practically dripping in sweat now. I began to pull off the damp thing when I was shocked to see what was underneath:

Abs. Pecs. Abs and pecs. I had to be dreaming, when did I go from a stick to having abs and pecs. Not only that, but my arms. Thick and smooth, my arms looked swollen, as though I had been working them out for years. And my legs, they felt like lead beneath me, so heavy I could hardly move them. I could crush a melon between my thighs. And my poor shoes, they were practically in tatters on the floor. My toes poked out of the remains, leather torn between my meaty soles. I looked in the mirror to get a full picture. If I didn’t see it I wouldn’t have believed it, I was a whole different man.

I grabbed my phone and booked it out the door back to the front desk. The same attendant was there, looking me up and down as I passed by:

“Well hey there handsome. How are you enjoying our amenities?”

I just about strangled him, “What the hell happened? What did you all do to me?!?”

“I did try to tell you. Locker rooms are the other side. Those are the changing rooms.”

“What’s that supposed mean?”

“Well, look at yourself. Must have gone for the muscle enhancement, eh? Not a bad look on you.” I could just about wipe that smug look off his face.

“Cut the bull crap, I didn’t ask for this. If you all changed me into this change me back.”

“So sorry,” the apology dripped from his lips, “but things don’t quite work that way. For more specialized changes you have to get a full membership.”

“That’s a fucking lie,” I shouted, “You never said shit about this. I don’t need your membership. Change me back, now.”

“Woah, calm down there hot stuff, no need to get so worked up. How about this. My boss is home for the night. I know what you looked like when you came in. I can sneak you back into one of our specialty changing rooms, and I’ll calibrate it myself. Deal?”

I was about in tears, “Deal.”

He took my hand and lead me to the changing room all the way in the back. Same set up, same bench in a mostly barren room. This one was maybe a tad smaller. His voice came on over the intercom:

“Alright, now just sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.”

This time, deep red lights came on and that same heat began to fill the room. It somehow felt a bit different. The other heat wrapped around, this one felt like it pierced. In moments my body was flooded with warmth. Sweat rolled down my body as the room began having its effects. But something wasn’t right. Instead of shrinking down to my lithe self, my body felt like it was bubbling, and began to swell even more.

“Hey. HEY! What the hell! What are you doing out there? Wrong way asshole!”

He chuckled into the intercom, “What? I think it’s a good look on you.”

“You’re supposed to change me back!” I shouted

“I said I would calibrate the room. I didn’t say how. You should feel lucky, you’re getting the VIP treatment for free!”

Everywhere sweat rolled my muscles stretched as my body began writhing under the feeling of its growth. It felt… it felt… oh god it felt… so…good. But it had to be stopped. I couldn’t keep going like this. I put all my effort into standing up and lunged for the door handle. It didn’t budge, locked from the outside.

“Oh, is this not to your taste?” he teased “Well, I already did smooth jock tonight. Fine, let’s try this then.”

The red lights switched off as dull LED’s took their place. At the same time, a mist began pouring into the room. The smell made me dizzy as I slumped back on the bench behind me. The haze curled around me and stuck to my skin. It smelled like aftershave, sharp and fresh, with a coolness that made me shiver. My skin began to tingle wherever it touched. I watched as my skin turned to goosebumps, then slowly a fine layer of fuzz began to coat my pecs. It grew and curled wherever the mist lead it. It blazed a treasure trail down my abs and branched out to cover them. I could only moan as my body pushed out my new pelt. It curled around my back as a forest erupted behind me. Working it’s way up, I felt a tickle on my jaw and cheeks. It caressed my face as a five o-clock shadow pushed out from my smooth face, and in moments a full beard was pushed out. It’s curling tendrils even worked on the hair I already had. I felt the hair on top of my head stand on end before following the mist into a thick mop. It worked it’s way into my gapping mouth too, and I felt my throat stretch and adjust, my moans coming out much deeper. Then it concentrated on my groin and pits. My previously trimmed bushes grew wild, quickly becoming a tangle. As my pubes grew around, it felt soooo good. I began getting hard, but the mist only took that as an opportunity. Something else to grow and curve. It stretched 6, 7, 8, 9 inches straight out before curving distinctly up. I was in pure ecstasy, with only the thought of the man outside watching keeping me from fully jacking off.

“Wow, what a grower. I knew you had potential but, woof.”

“You… won’t… *gasp*…get away… with… with this!”

“Oh, still a little rebel in you? Maybe we can bring that out a bit.”

The mist receded, and overhead the lights began to strobe and a loud white noise began to play. The pattern was disorientating and it hurt to watch. But even when I closed my eyes I couldn’t escape. A splitting headache developed as my emotions all turned to anger. I tried to shout, to call for it to stop, but my words didn’t even reach my ears. I watched in glimpses as I began to scream, deep and primal, rage in my eyes. My arm clenched into a fist and I ran up to pound the door down. It still didn’t budge but the shock sent a ripple down my arm. In the mirror I watched as in slow motion a full sleeve tattoo stretched down my arm. I sat down in pain and fear and anger as I grew close to tears. But the back of my mind knew that I could not cry, not anymore. Then, all at once it stopped. I realized I was still shouting. I felt pissed off, aggressive. When I got out of this room, I was gonna pummel that twink into submission.

“God, that one always gets me. I love a man with tattoos.”

“Fuck OFF” I growled. I looked in the mirror at the monster I had become:

My mind was being flooded with emotions, a sense of loss for the person I was, a rage at the man who had done this to me, an animalistic horniness from my sizable new cock, and a deep terror for what else could happen. I channeled that fury and made one last attempt on the locked door. I yanked and rattled the door with all the strength this new body could muster. I felt the handle flex beneath my grip, before a loud *snap* sent me plummeting to the ground. The handle had come off the door. I banging against the door, shouting for anyone to come help me.

“Hmmm,” the attendant contemplated, “I may have gone too far with the rage this time. You’re a beast bro, but let’s reign it in. A healthy dose of this should help.”

A new cloud filled the room, this one thicker than the last. It was damp and sticky and clung to every inch of me. This one smelled rich and acrid, like an arm pit that had long since sweat through any deodorant. It was as though every patron of the gym had joined me in the room fresh from their workout. The fog was so thick I felt as though I was beginning to choke. It slid heavily down my throat and made my eyes water. That’s when I felt it begin to corrupt me. My enraged mind became calm, then addled as my brain filled with the all consuming fog. Memories flashed before my eyes as I felt them slip from my mind, replaced with false copies. I felt my college experience shift from books and classes to working out and tutoring sessions. My classes in journalism and writing were swapped for work out routines and remedial math. Then my cock began twitching as memories of hot workout sessions with my bros filled my mind, replacing my book club. As my mind relaxed and the new memories came to me easier and easier. My IQ was slipping down quickly, resting now somewhere around 75. As my mind relaxed I felt my body do so too. The cloud began seeping into my pores, filling me with its corrupting influence. My body betrayed me, greedily sucking up the cloud until the room was completely clear. I felt warm and tingly, my body pressed flat against the cold floor. I lifted my arm to get a good wiff of my funk. My cock jumped in response. God I needed to fuck. The cloud had saturated me, inside and out, soaking me in a new identity.

“How are you feeling in there big guy?” a voice was on the other side of a speaker in the room.

“Aight I guess man. I’m tired. Guess I passed out in here,” I replied. God, just waking up from a nap and I had my morning wood. The door opened, a cute bro was on the other side.

“Have you enjoyed your day pass sir?” He asked.

“Hell yeah Lil’ bro, it’s been good. This gym is stacked. I haven’t felt this worn out after a workout in a while!”

“Have you considered upgrading that day pass to a full membership? I know I would love to see you around,” he said with a wink.

“Mmm, wouldn’t mind seeing you every day. Gimme the forms.” He led me out to the lobby, I signed a few forms, and handed me a card.

“Now remember next time, locker rooms are over there,” he smirked. “Here, this is free with your sign up.”

He threw a tank top over to me. Good thing too, I think I forgot mine at home. It fit snugly over my huge chest. It made my arms look huge too. Just a shame I sweat so much after a workout, I already had some pit stains going. Shit, I was rank.

“Thanks bro, I’ll see you tomorrow.” I strolled out the door into the cold winter air. I flexed, feeling the breeze wick some of my sweat away.

“Hey, excuse me?” Some dork walked up to me, looking desperate. I felt like I knew him from somewhere, though I couldn’t place it. “Would you happen to be able to help me? I have been going around in circles and can’t seem to find my way. I have an exam in just a few hours.”

“Nah, sorry man. I’m not quite sure I’m able to help. Never been good with directions huhu,” that’s when it clicked, “Hey, you’re in my bio class aren’t you? Ah shit, is that exam today?!? Fuck, I’m never gonna pass that crap.”

He looked a little flabbergasted, but made some excuses and was about to move on when I grabbed him. I felt something pass between us, as his gaze fell onto me, unblinking, “You should check in the gym bro, I know they can help you out.” I pulled away and the moment passed. I reached into my pocket and pulled out two receipts. The first was my receipt for my day pass. I scribbled down my contact info, and handed it off to the nerd. “Here, if you want to talk about lifting with me and my buds later you should give me a call. Looking a little scrawny bruh.”

He took the receipt before wandering towards the gym entrance. I then looked at the second paper I pulled out. Oh yeah, it was that hot gym bro from earlier. Yeah, I could meet up with him for sure. His name at the top rang a faint bell. For a split second, I remembered a friend I would sit next to in class. Smart, nerdy, nothing like the man I had met on the sidewalk earlier... But just then I felt my brain pounding, and I couldn’t focus on… whatever it was I was thinking about. Oh, right. Hot jock. Yeahhh, I’m gonna go see if he wants these rank pits shoved in his face while I ride his cock.

————

Maybe not what you had in mind, but I hope you enjoy anyways ❤️

[theyluvlyss]

𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐥...

batman's cape (and any of the other batfam member's capes) are heated/can be microwaved :D.

...yeah, probably not the most original thought. surely someone has come up with this before, and hey, maybe it's even canon - but that doesn't really take away any of the ideas I have, so on we go anyways lmao.

I imagine that you, y/n, reader (lol idk-) is often found all wrapped up in bruce's cape (ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S FRESH OUT OF THE WASH) and he'll be TEARING the manor apart looking for that shit because why would it be anywhere else except in the bat-cave, in his bat-suit vault, right there clipped onto the specific bat-suit he's choosing to wear for whatever mission he's finna go on, just to eventually find you on a couch somewhere above the bat-cave all rolled up like a worm in it with the glow of your phone emitting from underneath the fabric and your little giggles muffled by it because you're probably laughing at memes or something idk.

bruce is definitely the type to think it's silly and lowkey can't even blame you because it do be cold in the mansion, but he also refuses to drop the "I'm so hardcore and a brute and stone cold" act so he's yanking that shit offa' you and you're just BEWILDERED, suddenly exposed to the light and cold like, "😮⁉️🫨⁉️" and before you can even process wtf happened, bruce is already whisking around the corner, gone and out of sight💀.

dick would also think it's silly, but lowkey actually be annoyed, though, and he'd make that KNOWN. like, sure, he'd initially be VERY stressed when he can't find the cape (even though it's not thay big of a deal but for some reason, he just doesn't feel "complete" without it😭) but then he'd see this huge lump all wrapped up in it on a bed in one of the many rooms or something. at first, he'd think it's one of the handful of pets owned and living in the wayne estate, just to peel back the fabric and see YOU.

"...Hi😃..."

"...🙂Why are- Nevermind. You do know that I need this, right?"

"I mean,,, you don't need it, you just-"

*YANK!!*

"NO, WAIT, IT'S COLD!!"

"THEN GET A BLANKET!!"

I'm sorry, but I feel like dick don't play 'bout his cape, and you're just either gonna have to find different ways to sneak it or just leave it tf alone😭✋🏽. but when it's not currently in dire need by him, he'll happily return it to you and smile when you squeal and wrap yourself back up in and under it while it warms up.

BARBARA GETS IT FR. SHE GETS ✨️🩷YOU🩷✨️. but also, she is attached to it in the way dick is, so don't be surprised if and when she needs it, she's taking it from you with zero mercy and under the excuse of, "I'm on duty tonight, I'm not showing up out of uniform lol." and you're just left there like "☹️...". but outside of those times, the both of you can be found very happily and contently under her cape as you watch horror movies or something and rambling about who knows what, a common interest lol.

and I'm pretty sure in some strains/universes or whatever of dc, she ends up becoming oracle because she's paralyzed or some shit, right?? I could totally be wrong, but if I'm not, I feel like in that case, she just GIVES it to you. she makes it a huge deal, too, she acts like she's passing along the magical ashes of a dead ancestor that grants you infinite knowledge and protection or some shit and has a whole speech prepared, just for her to hand you this neatly folded up cloth and you're just like, "...You're giving me your cape😀??" and she's like, "Ya🙂♡." and you can't even be mad because ...

IT'S A HEATED CAPE like idk what else you could want from her like plz✋🏽.

(*casually skips over Tim bc idk enough about him and if I mischaracterized him I'd have to delete this account and then me off of the face of this earth bc I refuse to be that bitch who doesn't know her shit😃*)

jason will see you with his cape, and whether you're awake or asleep, he'll loom over you menacingly until you sense his presence, and then not even give you the chance to give excuses before he's like, "I'm on watch tonight."

you don't dare protest lmao. and he isn't giving it back to you later on. it's one of those things that if you really want it, you gotta go get it. and then expect you won't have it for very long, so whatever you plan on doing with it, you better make the most of it😭✋🏽. that's literally all I can say for him lmao.

DAMIAN (my fave) (^3^)/. I feel like he'd make it seem like SUCH an inconvenience for himself even though he doesn't actually care about the cape itself and if anything, finds it very sweet and endearing that you literally use it as a blanket because "it gets so warm" and "it smells like you" and "it's here when you're gone and I miss you". but, much like his father, he just HAS to keep up the, "I'm so stone cold and no nonsense and eternally vexed" facade, so if you're awake and you have it, he'll just hold out his hand expectingly and - like jason - you don't dare argue because you're just gonna lose🥲.

but if he finds the cape and you're asleep with/under it, he'll actually let you keep it. like, he'll just leave it and either go about his superhero duties without the cape entirely, or he'll just use another one from a different suit. sure, it might possess different capabilities (no pun intended), or he might feel a little... off... without a cape, but he'd rather that than interrupt your comfortable state.

and you'll be so bent up about it when he returns, and you're like, "WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TAKE IT😭💔?!" and he's like, "you were obviously very comfortable, I didn't want to disturb you😐..........🫶🏼."

so um.... yeah, I honeslty dk where all of that came from, but do with this info what you will.

byeeee /ᐠ^ω^マ~ !!

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Nik turns 50. TF 141 throw him a surprise party. (As the author continues to build their voices and headcanons in his head.)

cw: none.

“I can't believe Nik’s going to be fifty next week. The man's aging like a fine wine. It must be something in the water over there.”

It had been a fairly innocuous comment by Laswell over one of their frequent phone calls, but it had sent Price into an unfathomable tailspin.

Fifty.

Fifty was a big birthday where Price came from. The kind where the extended family, and wider community around them, were invited to a village hall for an old fashioned knees up, and you ended up carrying your uncle Rodney home so your aunt didn't smother him with a throw pillow after he pissed all over the doorstep.

Price had never really thought much about the families and wider lives of his contacts. They got the job done and then they parted ways. In every sense, a contact held the same position in Price's mind as the weapon in his hand; a tool to be used and then set aside once you were done.

But Nik… Nik was becoming more than a contact. A lot more. Price knew there was no uncle Rodney for Nik. There was no family whatsoever. No one special to mark half a century with, except maybe… fuck.

Price didn't share scotch with just anyone, let alone pass his cigar over for them to take a toke. As much as he respected Laswell, he was never inclined to spend hours with her chattin’ shit, until the sun broke through the blinds and they both had to slam some black coffee so they looked remotely presentable for their operators. His hand never lingered on anyone else's carrier vest, and no one else's voice made warmth and light curl in his chest.

No one else slotted against Price's... everything quite like Nikolai.

Price wasn't stupid. He knew what these signs meant, but that didn't mean he had any idea what the fuck to do about them. It was safer to just… be, too cowardly to progress any further. And yet, this felt like a milestone somehow.

“Captain, are you there? John?”

“Rog, yeah… uh. Continue.”

By the time Price had hung up, he had resolved to do something to mark Nik’s birthday. Laswell had coughed up the exact date and then slyly asked why Price was so interested. Her tone suggested she already had a hunch. “141 tradition,” he'd said, before hanging up. Rude, but she'd cope.

He finished some paperwork and turned in for the night, but sleep didn't come easy. His plans played out across the dark ceiling above his head and each time he settled on a course of action, he picked a hundred holes in it and cast it aside.

“Buy him a bottle of vodka and put a bow on your prick,” Simon said over eggs and bacon. The majority of the base was still asleep, with only a few other troopers skulking around the canteen.

Price choked on his gulp of tea and thumped his chest. “Classy, Simon.”

“You’ve been dancin’ round each other for years,” Simon murmured, rubbing at the stubble below the line of his mask. “Best time as any to pull the trigger.”

“Pot. Kettle. Black,” Price said as he stabbed at the bacon on his plate to emphasise each word.

“Fuck off,” Simon grumbled, “sir.”

Price snorted a laugh and they finished the rest of their breakfast in companionable silence. After a session in the gym, a myriad of brain-numbing meetings and supervising some training runs, Price was no closer to shaking out of his decision paralysis. If they were on mission he could have hashed out a plan without taking a breath, but he… didn't want to fuck this up. It felt too important.

Price was left with no choice but to consult professionals.

“Surprise party,” Soap said gleefully, chucking his playing cards onto the coffee table. “In th’ hanger, we invite him over tae ‘discuss an op’,” Soap lifted his fingers to emphasise the spoken quotation marks, “get Laswell tae send the invite.”

Gaz nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, then he won't suspect anything - oh, oh, I've got Farah's number, we can get her in on it. She’ll know if he’ll want anyone else, and… uh, you know, we’ll get clearance.”

“Right,” Price leaned back, arms folded over his chest. “So, what… we need food, and cake.”

“Aye, sir,” Soap said, squinting. “And booze. Gaz an’ I'll sort the logistics, and ye jus’ need tae sort the pressie.”

“We’re on it, sir. Leave it to us.”

The present. Price could do that. No worries.

Two days later, he stared down at the forty item long Amazon wishlist he had titled “Operation Black Hawk” and had no idea what to get. Something that walked the line of funny but sentimental, that said ‘you’re hot as fuck but I'm not desperate but I absolutely wank over you in the shower’.

“Fuckin Christ,” Price whispered at this office ceiling, slouched deep in his chair. He closed his eyes and forced his mind to quiet but for thoughts of Nik. Think, think.

So many conversations, ice tinkling against glass, low chuckles and borish jokes; a warm palm on Price’s shoulder and a smile so toothy it was contagious. Endless memories of time at Nik’s side. There had been that summer Nik had come fishing with him. Just a few days of peace before they both returned to the field. Nik had snoozed through most of it, exhausted by their previous mission, but in between he had surveyed the lake, watching the insects flit across the water.

“Poprygun'ya strekoza, leto krasnoye propela,” Nikolai had murmured.

“Cursing my ancestors?” Price had asked before gulping down a mouthful of beer.

Nik had chuckled. “Nyet, captain. It means a playful prankish Dragonfly, the whole summer have sung out. It is a poem by Ivan Karylov. One of my favourites.”

“Yeah? What's it about?”

“It is a fable...”

“Oh bloody hell, not another Russian morality lesson.”

“Pssh, this is good one. You will like it,” Nik had sat up in his camping chair. “It is about a beautiful dragonfly who spends her summer dancing and resting, while the hardworking ant prepares. When winter comes, she begs the ant for help, but he refuses, because he worked hard and she did not.”

“Harsh but fair. Work hard, play hard, them’s the rules..”

“You see, I knew you would like it. You are an ant. You earn your rest. This,” Nik had gestured at fishing tackle, the camping equipment, and the lake, “is the fruit of your labour, and I am privileged to share it with you, my friend.”

“And I you, mate.”

They had knocked their bottles together and moments later one of Price’s reels had begun spinning out. By that point they'd drunk so much that landing the damn carp had left them both up to their knees in lake water, pissing themselves laughing on the bank. It had been both the worst and best fishing expedition of Price’s life.

Price opened his eyes in the present and grinned at the ceiling, digging his phone out of his pocket. He knew exactly what he was going to get Nik.

The rest of the week sprinted by quicker than a RAF pilot on his way to a champagne dinner, and before he knew it Price was standing on a rickety plastic chair hanging a bloody banner from a rusty nail high on the hanger wall.

“It's wonky, cap,” Gaz said just as Price was climbing down.

“I think you'll find your eyes are wonky, sergeant.”

“Of course, sir. I'll get that sorted.”

Price pressed his hands to the small of his back and glanced around at the preparations. The sergeants had done well. Soap had even managed to draft Simon in on the booze run and there was a healthy selection of spirits on the buffet table by the birthday cake. It was a Colin Caterpillar from Marks and Spencers, one of Nik's favourite shops to visit when he was in the UK, with a joke candle stuck in the top that he wouldn't be able to blow out. Soap's idea.

The majority of Chimera had turned up to mark the occasion, as had a few faces Price recognised from previous ops with other organisations and task forces. Soap had said a few didn't quite pass the bar for security clearance, which wasn't surprising.

It was just as Gaz and Soap were bickering over the playlist that they heard the telltale drum of helicopter blades beat overhead. “Places, places!” Soap crowed from the hanger door, slamming the lights off. Booted feet scuttled across the dusty floor to find hiding places behind the vehicles and crates stacked around the edges, and Price joined Soap by the door.

Several minutes passed, and then… “And you have no idea where the weapons store is?”

“None at all, Nik. Price should have more intel,” Laswell replied. She had rendezvoused with Nik in Germany as part of the plan. Her wife was currently squatting behind a crate with Gaz.

“I hope so or this will be a difficult mission.”

Soap was practically vibrating at Price's shoulder as Nik rounded the corner. He slammed on the lights and everyone erupted from their hiding places on cue. Price didn't miss how Nik’s hand dropped for his sidearm, his eyes blown wide.

“Laswell, what is–?”

“Happy birthday, Nikolai,” she said, walking by to plant a kiss on her wife's cheek.

“I–” Nik glanced around the hanger as he accepted hugs from Gaz and Syd, handshakes from others, still bewildered. “How–?”

“It was th’ captain's idea,” Soap said, jutting his chin at Price. “He told us ye were hittin’ the big five-oh, old man. Ye not gettin’ off that easy.”

“Here, drink,” Simon grunted, pressing a glass into Nik's hand. “I'm startin’ the food, Johnny. I've been patient.”

“Aye, L.T. Bust open th’ sarnies. Farah, th’ ones on the left are halal - aye, bet.”

Nik was drawn into conversation briefly and Price hung back, glancing at the badly wrapped parcel he'd stashed on top of an empty oil container. He was so focused on his internal misgivings that Nik’s hand on his elbow made him startle. “Oi, give me a bloody heart attack…”

“You did this?”

“MacTavish and Garrick did this,” Price said.

Nik, who knew that the 141 did nothing without Price's express permission, grinned toothily. They stood in silence as he surveyed the many faces scattered around the hanger, some shoving sandwiches in their faces while others swigged from freshly open bottles. “I… have never had a birthday party before.”

“What? Not even as a kid?”

Nik shrugged one shoulder. “Nyet, it was not a… priority.” He looked back at Price, dark eyes heavy with something complex and unreadable. “Thank you.”

Price swallowed and tried to ignore the heat creeping up his neck. “You're uh… you're welcome, I… got you something. But, uh…” Before he could wuss out, Price grabbed the poorly wrapped parcel and shoved it into Nik's hands. “Happy birthday.”

Nik set his glass aside. “Your wrapping skills are…”

“Bloody fantastic.”

“...unique.”

“I'll take it.”

Nik huffed a laugh as he tore the brown paper away and flipped the book over in his hands. Price was relieved to see his face brighten. “Aesop’s fables. Captain, this is beautiful…”

To be fair, it was a damn pretty book. The hardcover was illustrated with the animals from the fables, the pages edged in gold, and the inside cover was patterned. You know… posh. And then Nik found the second part, tucked about a quarter of the way through. It was a photograph from their fishing expedition. A rough selfie, with half a fish head in shot where Nik was trying to display their catch, and Price’s face smeared with mud from where he had stumbled onto the bank.

Nik's eyes lingered on it, his fingertips brushing over their grinning faces, and he swallowed.

Price panicked. “I'm sorry, it's shit, I'll uhm–”

Nik pulled him into an embrace that crushed the air from his lungs. There was definitely a stutter in Nik’s chest, and Price wrapped his arms around him in return. If he happened to turn his nose into Nik's neck, and Nik happened to press his face a little closer, then that was fine. More than fine.

Price's toes curled in his boots, his fingers tightened in Nik’s shirt, the aching in his chest becoming that much harder to ignore. “You alright?”

“Da,” Nik said tightly. “I just need a minute.”

“Take all the time you need,” Price murmured, closing his eyes as he cradled Nik against him. He didn't mark the time, happy to revel in the warmth of the solid body in his arms, and the smell of Nik's skin, pressed so close Price could feel the thrum of his heartbeat.

When Nik finally pulled away, slightly reddened eyes lingered on Price’s lips before turning to the rest of the party, who were doing a shitty job of pretending they hadn't all been watching. “Later, I would… like to spend some time with you.”

Price didn't want to examine the heat under his skin too closely, lest it be entirely misplaced. “Course.”

“Nik, get over ‘ere tae blow th’ oot before Ghostie eats yer cake’s face!”

Nik tucked his book under his arm and walked over to the buffet table with Price to a horrifically off-key rendition of ‘happy birthday’. Once Nik had worked the candles out, flicking them at Soap with a loud Russian cuss, festivities descended, as they usually did on base, into raucous drinking games and whatever the sergeants decided passed for dancing. Simon lost the Ring of Fire and had to down the filthiest pint Price had ever seen in his life, Laswell thrashed them all at beer pong and Gaz tried to teach Farah how to do the worm. As far as fiftieth birthday parties went, it definitely beat out the village hall knees up.

Later, when the majority of the party had slunk off to dark corners, fallen asleep where they sat or retired in good order, Nik pulled his captain back into his arms and kept him there until the sun rose. Except, this time, they did a damn sight more than talk.

[koishiro]

# - 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ — 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 : fluff

masterlist | jjk masterlist | anon masterlist

Satoru Gojo 五条悟

Congratulations, you’ll never be alone again!

He would be infatuated with you

This man (boy) would not hesitate to embarrass himself in front of you

And by that I mean;

He would trip himself up, walk into a door, accidentally bump into you…

He would do the stupidest things all to get your attention

And if it was back when he was a student, I can imagine him calling out a teacher on a mistake or having a smart remark so he could see your smile, especially if it was from his doings

He’d still do that as a teacher himself actually

And if it was valentines?

Expect your desk to be covered in an array of heart shaped chocolate boxes, flower bouquets and many cards

He’d probably include expensive things as well like bracelets, rings, necklaces and earrings

Even if it wasn’t valentines and it was just any other day he’d either leave a note on your desk or a bag of mochi

Be grateful he didn’t devour that shit on the way

And during training?

He could be in the middle of training his students when he’d suddenly stop and just stare at you walking past

Either that or he would show tf off

There’s no inbetween

Poor Yuji, Megumi and Nobara would walk back to their dorms black and blue

He would beg the higher ups to assign you missions together

And you best know he’s going to pick on you

If you’re short? You’re now a portable headrest

If you’re tall? How’s the weather?

“Oh! My little Mochi! How are we today hm? Would you like to know where I was yesterday - I’ll tell you anyway, I happened to stumble upon a sweet shop and found some kikufuku and they had that flavour you like so much so out of the kindness of my heart I thought to buy you some!”

Suguru Geto 下戸傑

You wouldn’t even know this man has a crush on you, he’s that chill

You’d just think he’s really friendly

But saying that, he’d try and spend more time around you

You need to go shopping? He’ll be there to carry your bags

You can’t sleep at 3 in the morning? He’ll be at your door in 5 minutes

And he would (unknowingly to him) take such good care of you

And this man is smooth af while doing it

You’re both walking down a busy street? He’ll have his hand on your lower back

“Wouldn’t want you getting lost now would we?”

Walking next to the road? Not with him around

You’re cold? Here, have his jacket

If you’re both in a room full of people his eyes will automatically search for you, making sure you’re okay and not uncomfortable

And you best know he’ll be right behind you if you are

If someone cuts you off halfway through your sentence? Geto would stare that mf down until they shut up and motions for you to continue

“Stay close to me, there are too many men here staring at you. Can’t let them get any ideas now can we? Unless that’s what you want hm? I’d be forced to change your mind otherwise”

Itadori Yuji いたどりゆうじ

He’d be so nervous around you 🥹

He’s a blushing mess every time you step into the same room as him

Impossibile for him to keep his eyes off you

He just stares at you and smiles :)

But god forgive if you make contact with him-

He passes you a work sheet or a book and you brush fingers? He’ll drop everything

Continues to try and save himself which turns out to be futile considering he can’t stop stuttering out an apology

He’d also overthink every and any interaction you have with each other

That brush of fingers earlier? Was that a sign? Should he do something to confirm this? Eye contact? Should he make eye contact?

He’ll even leave cute little trinkets on your desk that he thought you’d like from his trips

And seeing you smile at that silly little note he left on your desk makes his entire week

Would definitely try and show you how strong he is 110%

You’re walking past the training field?

He’s there lifting Panda with one hand

“O-oh Y/n! What are you doing here? You look really pretty today! - not that you don’t everyday! I just mean that you look extra pretty today but you look extra pretty all the time, I’m running out of compliments…”

Fushiguro Megumi 伏黒恵

Like Suguru, you wouldn’t even know Megumi has a crush on you

…If it wasn’t for Yuji and Nobara of course

Oh hey, I have post on that-

You’re walking past him in the halls? Nobara and Yuji are there poking him and whispering (which probably shouldn’t count as whispering)

“Oh Megumi~ Don’t look now but someone you like is walking behind you~”

Which resulted in the both getting smacked upside the head

And if Gojo caught wind of this?

Gojo would leave bags of mochi or little notes saying how pretty you looked that day and sign it from your beloved Megumi

He’d even try and give ‘parental’ advice

That didn’t end well

I can imagine you walking up to him with the mochi and card in hand to kiss his cheek as a thank you which left him a flustered mess

He just holds his cheek with a straight face as you walk off 😌

Moving on though,

He’d be such a gentleman-

He’d lay his jacket on top of your legs if you’re wearing shorts or a skirt

And if you’re cold? Have his jacket

He notices you didn’t get much sleep that night? Oh look an energy drink magically appeared on your desk

You’re sad? He’ll summon his Divine Dogs

But don’t bring this to his attention, he’ll deny everything

“Hm? You received mochi on your desk? How should I know? - why are you looking at me like that? What are you - oh… yeah, must’ve slipped my mind”

Kugisaki Nobara 釘崎野薔薇

It’d be pretty obvious she likes you

If everyone’s talking over you or you have something to say she’ll have no hesitation in screaming at everyone to shut up

“EVERYONE SHUT UP! Y/N HAS SOMETHING TO SAY THAT I’M SURE ALL OF YOU ARE DYING TO KNOW SO LISTEN UP! …Go on Y/n”

You’re going on every shopping trip she has, which is near daily so good luck 🫡

But don’t worry, she won’t make you carry all her bags no no no

That’s for Yuji and Megumi to deal with

And those shopping trips will lead to sleepovers

Which will lead to her styling your outfits for the next month

Which will then lead to her mixing her clothes with yours justifying it by saying it goes better than any of your other ones

A subtle claim but one nonetheless

She would show you off like it’s nobodies business (except it is)

“Everyone! Look at my partner!! Look how hot they are - HEY DONT YOU CALL THEM HOT! THATS MY JOB”

You have social media? She already follows you

She would drool over every picture

Comments, hearts, the whole shabang

And let’s not forget the daily compliments of course

She’d somehow know if you’re wearing a different shade of lipgloss that day

Or if you’ve changed the colour of your nails

“Ahh you look so pretty today! Your eyeshadow is so cute!! Wait is that my top? Didn’t I tell you it would go well with your skirt, I’m always right! You should keep it, it suits you better anyway”

Toji 杜氏

How in the world did you pull this guy?

He’d be cocky af though

You might not know but if you tell him something about yourself or something you like he’ll have it ingrained into his brain while at the same time pretending not to give two fucks

Like I can imagine him seeing something you mentioned in a previous conversation in a shop window and buys it, gives it to you and says;

“I bought too much so I thought I’d give you the rest.”

“But it’s wrapped?”

“…It came like that”

Mhm sure

And if you asked his opinion on a certain outfit he’d definitely say;

“Who cares? Wear whatever you want, I cant fight”

Okay daddy-

He’d be such a bodyguard though, you cannot convince me otherwise

Like Geto he’d stand behind you to silently let them know you’re off limits

Even though you’re not dating he’d still have a possessive hand around your waist idc

“Why you gotta look like that hm? Always lookin’ so pretty for me. You tryna get their attention or something? Bet that’s what you want huh, want me to show them who you really belong to isn’t that right”

Zen’in Maki┊禪院真希

First off, I’m jealous but okay moving on

She’d be a low-key soft tsundere

Lemme explain,

This girl is a strong independent woman who gives no shits whatsoever and also has a very high wall built to hide her emotions and to keep you tf out

Therefore!, she’d pick on you (and no one else) in the nicest way possible

“Where do you think you’re going wearing that, a circus? You look like an idiot… but a cute idiot I guess…”

My heart-

And if you’d tease her back she’d just push your face away and walk in the opposite direction

She’d probably let you wear her glasses if you ask nicely

She’d even volunteer to help you train just so she can spend more time with you 🥹

Would purposely make you flustered no doubt in my mind (wouldn’t even have to try)

During practice she’d trip you up and land on you CENTIMETRES away from your face and just smirk

Ahahdbjsmke

She’d grin at anything cute you do

You’re doing a lil happy dance while eating? She’s there staring at you with a small grin

You’re pouting because something didn’t go your way? She’ll just tilt her head and smile

“You always look so cute when you do that little dance of yours, what’s got you so happy huh? Wanna tell me so you do that cute dance again? Go on, don’t be shy now”

Inumaki Toge 狗巻棘

My sweet sweet boy

He’d silently fan boy at everything you do

Definitely your personal cheerleader 🤝

At any and every one of your accomplishments, he’d cheer you on with his little jig of a dance

He’d rant to Panda in onigri ingredients at how perfect you are

He blushes A LOT

But you’ll never know since he has his collar zipped up at all times 😔

Every time you make him nervous he’ll fidget with his hands and look anywhere but at you

You compliment him over text while he’s in his dorm? He’s trying not scream and just rolls back and forth in his bed in excitement and happiness

I can imagine him standing behind Nanami doing silly little dances to make you laugh

Loves head pats, that’s it. That’s all.

He malfunctions when ruffle or comb your fingers through his hair

His tail would be wagging if he was a dog

He’d give you gifts as well but not any gifts

For example;

You’re usually cold in class? He’ll buy you a scarf and give it to you the next day

You’ve been staying up lately due to assignments? He’ll place a bag of energy bars and caffeinated drinks on your desk

He does all this while reprimanding you in onigri ingredients

He’d even keep spares in his bag just in case

“What did I tell you about staying up late huh? And will you ever learn to wear something warm to class or do I need to continuously bring these things with me? You’re lucky you’re cute!”

Nanami Kento 七海健人

Bby would be so professional

He’d keep trying to convince himself that it isn’t professional to have feelings for his colleague

Yet he couldn’t help but spend more time with you

He’d ask for your opinion on certain topics (shocker I know) or if you’d be able to print something out for him

He’d do this so much it’d start to make you suspicious

Even Gojo would catch on…

“Nanamin~ how come you ask Y/n for their opinion when you have me huh?”

Like Megumi he’d be such a gentleman

He’d put his coat on your lap if you’re wearing shorts or a skirt

He’d put his hand on your back to guide you through busy crowds

He’d make an extra cup of coffee/tea for you when he’s making one for himself

I feel like he’d have a certain tick when he’s nervous like scratching the side of his head or behind his ear

It’d be so fckn cute 😤

You mention the tie he’s wearing that day suits him or brings out his eyes? Don’t be surprised if he wears it again tomorrow

He wouldn’t even be ashamed about it

“What are you looking at? Oh my tie? What’s wrong with it? Didn’t you say it suited me yesterday? Thought I’d wear it for you again”

—

— 𝘒𝘰𝘪 𝘹𝘰

[thehouseofurmotha]

Hi! I was wondering if you can please do katsuki bakugo dating fem!reader who’s quirk is like panty from panty and stocking but her personality is like super sweet but will get mean if need to (also if it’s not a problem can it be dating hc’s? 🫶

Hiya! Thank you for the request <3 I've never watched Panty and Stocking so everything is based on what I've read from google, so if anything is wrong feel free to correct me and I'll rewrite it! <3 (I am def gonna watch it soon though so I might as just redo it based on information I get from that)

• You and Bakugou were dating for 2 months, when you finally told him about what exactly your quirk is. It's safe to say you don't think you'll ever see him as flustered as he was. You thought it was very adorable though.

• You understand that certain details of your quirk can be embarrassing to other people. Though feeling embarrassed about your quirk is never a thought that's occurred to you. But after Midoriya passed out one time while he was asking questions about your quirk you figured it was better to keep to yourself.

• You and Bakugou had known each other from childhood, and had started dating 2 months before you started U.A.

• Bakugou is like 'wait how tf did you figure out what your quirk was.

• You explain to him that you have another form, and you turning into that when you were 6 is how you found out about that. But then you explain to him that you didn't know about your gun until you were 14, and you were trying to get changed and suddenly there was a gun in your hand. Was a very confusing moment for you 😭

• He thinks your quirk is cool asf though, and he's always pushing you to do your best in training. He'd never tell you about it but he really wants to see your other form.

• The first time he does it's safe to say bro was WHIPPED. He thought you looked like an absolute goddess.

• let's talk about the reasons he ended up seeing your other form though. Everyone in the class adored you, they thought you were the sweetest. Until someone pissed you off.

• During the attack on the USJ, you had ended up with Bakugou and Kirishima. Bakugou was just happy that you were with him so he could protect you. Bakugou knew you were strong, Kirishima on the other hands only saw what you did during the first training activity and the fitness test, which sadly didn't end up being much.

• Homie was like, "stay behind me y/n! I'll protect you. And you and Bakugou both look at him like 'bitch what?' Then you guys start getting attacked by villains so you get your weapon out, starting to shoot at the villains. And then you watch one of them get a nasty hit and Bakugou.

• You were pissed, and not about to let that shit slide. Then before you've realized it, you're in your other form. Which your parents lovingly adorned your Angel form. (Idk if I used that word right guys).

• Bakugou and Kirishima could not 🙅‍♀️ keep their eyes off of you, like you were so bright. Your boyfriend thought you looked like an absolute goddess and was absolutely going to tell you so after this.

• If the class (or specifically mineta) ever found out about the full truth of your quirk. He would yell at anyone who said any weird or rude comments about it.

Bonus:

(During the fitness test)

"Kats, real quick gimmie your underwear." You whisper at him, maybe a bit to loud cause u get some odd looks from your classmates.

"Y/n what the actual fuck."

"Don't be weird about it, it'll hopefully make the barrel of my baby big enough to launch the softball out of it." You give him a small smile, not really understanding that he's still embarrassed about it.

"You are the weirdest person ever." Yet he still obliges, and you were right which meant you at least didn't come in last place during the test.

Aizawa was a little concerned tho when you transformed them back and threw Bakugou's pair at him while none of your classmates were looking.

[lovebugism]

Okay, for your Blurbcember what about "Don't you think gingerbread houses with gingerbread men are kinda morbid? I mean, it's a house made out of flesh?" with Steve? And reader just pauses, bag of icing in hand while the gingerbread roof slowly slips off and stares at Steve like boy, I love you but what tf is in your eggnog?

you might be genius for this one, anon. hope u like it!! — you, the grump of the group, try hopelessly to decorate a gingerbread house with your perfectly ditzy bf (grump!reader, established relationship, fluff, 0.8k)

blurbcember ˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚

“We can’t decorate this if you keep eating all the candy. You know that, right?” Your voice comes in a concentrated, half-annoyed monotone. You’d be grumpier about it if you weren’t so focused. Now, you’re more worried about piping even shingles on the gingerbread roof than your boyfriend eating all of your supplies.

Steve stops chewing with a cheekful of something sugary. “Sorry,” he apologizes, mostly muffled.

You lay the piping bag on the tabletop and flash a deadpanned glance to the boy beside you. With his hair grown out and pushed over his head, chiseled jaw scruffy and unshaven, and ugly Christmas sweater pushed up to his elbows — you think he’s the coziest he’s ever looked. Far too pretty to be mad at.

“Can you hand me the gumdrops?”

He nods enthusiastically, happy to finally help in some way. He reaches to his left for the plastic bag of vividly colored candies. The bag is lighter than he expected, and much much emptier. It shouldn’t surprise him. He’s the one that ate them all.

“Sorry…” he repeats as he passes the bag to you. He gives you a crooked smile in return, an enthusiastic glimmer in the honey of his eye. “It looks really pretty so far, though!”

“Yeah, no thanks to you,” you murmur. 

Dustin told you that this was usually a team effort, a friendly competition between the whole group, but your fingers are the only ones cramping now. You delicately stick each gumdrop into place and try to ignore how tense your wrist has gotten. You figure the Henderson boy must be much of the same in the living room — he’s too much of a perfectionist for anything else.

“You’re the one that told me to stop helping!”

“‘Cause you almost broke the ceiling off, remember?”

“You underestimate my strength, sweetheart,” Steve argues, only half-joking. He leans his elbow on the table and props his scruffy chin on a balled-up fist. “My strong hands can crack that gingerbread, no problem.”

“Yeah. Okay,” you scoff.

“It doesn’t have to be perfect, okay? We just have to make it better than Dustin’s, because I do not want to spend another year with that little shit bragging about making the best house.”

Dustin Henderson is a little super genius, and Nancy, Robin, and Will are the judges this year. The odds of beating everyone’s favorite smartmouth aren’t exactly in your favor. You’re not the most creative person either, but you are pretty competitive. To a fault, some might say.

Honestly, the only reason you took this gig was because you wanted to spend more time with Steve. 

He doesn’t need to know that, though.

“Well, you didn’t have me a year ago, did you?” you quip, eyes still trained on the creation before you.

Steve grins so wide that it’s audible in his sickly sweet tone. “No. I didn’t. I got real lucky this go around, didn’t I?”

His smile grows when your face screws up in annoyance. “You’re disgusting…”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Hand me the candy canes,” you tell them. And then, because you’re trying to be nicer — “Please.”

With his lips quirked in a lopsided smile, he hands you the plastic bag. You stick a couple of the mini sticks into the makeshift yard, then break the ends off to use as windowsills. You put two of them together in a heart shape and stick them to the front of your house, just below the roof.

Steve’s chest swells with warmth. “Aw, that’s cute. You big softie.”

“Shut up…” you grumble.

“It’s a compliment,” the boy laughs, a sunshine sound that turns the kitchen golden. He leans back in his chair and crosses his arms over his chest. The bottom of his sweater lifts slightly, flashing a sliver of his stomach. “It’s real nice, you know, for a gingerbread house and everything.”

You squint at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, I mean— don’t you think gingerbread houses are kinda morbid? Like… It’s a house. Made out of their flesh.” He explains it all like it’s obvious, like it’s a thought he’s had a million times before. He scoffs out a laugh, amused by your visible confusion. “It’s kinda weird when you think about it.”

At a loss for words, you blink at the boy beside you. You don’t think you’ve ever been more dumbfounded — more in love with anybody else in the whole entire world.

Steve is so much different than you are. You’re sometimes too serious, easily annoyed, and a little bit gauche. And Steve is… like walking into the sun. He’s like walking into the sun for the very first time after a terribly long winter.

“What?” he says, chuckling at the silence. The plastic on the table crinkles audibly when he reaches for another gumdrop. He chucks three into his mouth at once, then remembers he isn’t supposed to be eating them at all. “Oh, shit— sorry, babe.”

“Did you spike the eggnog?” you blurt.

“No,” he scoffs, trying to get the candy out of the back of his teeth with his tongue.

You shake your head with a distant smile and try hopelessly to hide it from him. “You’re crazy,” you murmur under your breath.

Steve grins, lopsided and rosy, and with grains of sugar stuck to the corners of his mouth. “Yeah. For you.”

[haveihitanerve]

I figured that I would actually provide the source material to the stuff im commenting on, so uh yeah, here ya go, more SFTH nonsense with my thoughts bc you guys actually seem to care and enjoy them strangely enough???

anyway yeah, you know the drill, dont care about my dumb little lizard brain squeals of joy, dont click the keep reading button bc its a lot lol :)

those of you who do(thanks) and continue!!!-

“One of you… is hosting a party…” Luke looking between them like ‘who tf is gonna move’ while AJ is literally already half out of his chair because he knows they’re gonna make him do it-(literally a quote from Tom[not verbatim but close] “we always make AJ guess, because he… has the most trouble with it, and thats a joy”)anyway-

Sam’s eyebrow raise at Tom across the stage

“Balding” whoever said that- i love you. Sam, of course, volunteers, he’ll never pass up an opportunity to rag on one of his besties and we love him for it

His grin, once again across stage, to Tom

“Vampire bugs bunny.” toms face- and Luke immediately pointing it out

“He can do Bugs Bunny, I cannot.” “you can do bugs bunny cant you” help the fact that they just know  all this ahhhhh <333333

“Oh shit, Which means I’m balding…” don't lie tom you cant wait to annoy AJ with this

“What do you want Luke to be?” Tom you evil evil genius

“This is for giving him balding-” don't act like its karma Tom this is all you ever wanted

“Someone who’s convinced he’s tall.” whoever said that, marry me- you're hilarious and clearly have good taste if you're at this show

Luke also laughing at the joke is a joy

Tom pacing as Luke takes control again, literally grinning giddily with excitement ugh they clearly love what they do so much and its so pure

Toms smile at “yay!” idk its just pretty

Aj idk what kind of accent this is but im loving it

But tf were those hand movements- are we wrapping presents? 

Ok even he broke at it, and sam was grinning- luke laughed, very nice

So im not a big bugs bunny person but even i can kinda catch on to what sams trying to do- very clever, im soooo many levels of curious to know if aj can guess it

“Carrot” !!!!!!he said CARROT!!!! YAY close

Tom crossing the stage to enter from the same door as Sam-honestly i cant with their stagecraft anymore help-

Also the doorbell is soooo much higher for tom than it was for sam- sams was at his chest, toms was above his head anyway

“Careful.” AJs glance up into the cosmos to figure out what tf that means and how its a hint

Toms doing great job of being insecure about his hair, loving it, and the audience is eating this up

“This guy sucks and i should know about that” AJ’s frozen face of fear because what is he trying to tell me, quick what does that mean- oh shit im screwed-

“Other front door.” yep! Theres the stagecraft comment- Tom dodged it quite obviously but Luke had to go for the joke

PFFFFFF oh wow Luke is doing a brilliant job of being tall, truly

“I was just looking in the mirror and I couldn't see him behind me.” oh i completely forgot about the vampire bit- thank you tom-

Also sam helping him out with the “ting!’ is great, we love to see them helping each other (for once lol)

“All of the characters of the looney tunes” oh aj so close

“Uh, the bunny one.” “oh please no!” XD NOOOO AJ!!! COME ON!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!

Luke breaking as well for it is the best 

Aj having to turn to look at him like “why did you let him choose this character- idk who this is.” 

“..lots of creatures” Luke literally folds, as Sam does the classic disappointed covering his face with one hand and tom has to walk away, classic

The way they join behind AJ like moral support kills me-

“Oh no you're really annoying me you're really---*expectant waiting* [bugging me]” nope aj is lost “fuckin-” now sam has to walk away LMAOOO

TOM LITERALLY ALMOST WALKING OFF STAGE IS INSANE

“Its like surveillance” aj- please, im begging you- we’re all begging you- go. simple. 

“Its called they piss you off.” Luke walking to the front of the stage so that everyone can see his disappointed head hang is crazy

“BUGS!!!” LADIES AND GENTLEMEN HES DONE IT AGAIN!!!! 

Oh no… oh no, aj please- please get it- please

“Bugs bunny.” YEAH!!!! YES YAY WOOHOO!!! HES DONE IT!!!!

Tom finally getting his moment to bring up his excellent addition- “its so crazy, i couldn't see him behind me in the mirror.” also walking to the front of the stage, thats gonna be a pattern

SAM LITERALLY KISSING AJ ON HIS BALD HEAD OMG IM GONNA CRY OF CUTENESS WHATTTTTT

MY HEART

“Hey my bald friend over here,” yess!!! Two in one!!! Nice work!!!

“Thats  your quirk.” man has never been so insulted in his l i f e 

Tom shrugging in answer as AJ smiles in disbelief is amazing

“I've got a pretty good angle.” while looking at the floor is what gives me life luke never change

“Is it like me ten years ago?” luke and tom both breaking at that- also, side note, they've known each other ten years to bring it up casually and have witnessed aj balding- moving on

Tom literally having to hug AJ after he guesses right XD i adore these little fucks so much

“You are so buff right now man.” Aj confused as to if this is real or…??? “Ok-?” laughs. oh these ridiculous goobers

“Fat friend.” wrong- wrong direction dude- up, not sideways🤭 so close

“All through this” still looking down, gestures to the space above his head that does not have body as much as he would like it to be

Luke having a breakdown on stage about an issue that he genuinely gets ragged on so much for- im losing my mind omfg-

“Tiny giant.” luke losing it again- and i gotta say thats a pretty nice way to describe it, i think he gets the point

Tom leaned forward in anticipation, the cutest smile on his face, sam leaned back, trepidatious 

“Im really- Im not *moves to the front of the stage and yells at the audience* tiny okay???” lukes loosing it niow

“Its very funny isn't it?” oh no, hes pacing and breaking the fourth wall- oh no

“Cause hes tall-” Tom perking up, “oh look! Im being included back in the sketch!” “and hes a normal height!” AJ isn't even bothering to think anymore, just enjoying the show

“Hes only 5’10” yes!!! Call him out Luke!!!

“And yet somehow Im a fucking short guy!!!” i just love the other three dudes expression in this scene, just pure delight at Luke finally snapping(albeit jokingly) and being like ‘yeah… tough luck’

Also, love Luke casually including the people no longer in the sketch back into it just to make a point and call out his legitimate grievances, love it

“Im not short!” oh now hes back in it ok-

“I don't know if im talking to a character or luke right now-” Tom and Sam breaking before he even finishes the sentence lol

“I don't know either.” oh poor baby XD

“Luke,” genuinely starts to address him by his actual name, gods i love them- he was about to legitimately comfort him before sam came in- i know it(or insult him further but like wtv, same thing lol)

“Connnn-vict!” Luke trying to speak and then giving up- AJ!!! Vince! Not Vikt!!!

YAYYY!!!! HE DID IT!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this segment of me losing my mind about SFTH and their incredible bromance and also humor, thanks for tuning in, see you next time(maybe, if you guys still want it lol)!

@dawn-speckled you wanted it last time, hope you want it still??? anyway, thanks for reading, it means a lot, and byebye 👋

[manic-sapphic]

gonna pretend i'm sorry for this cause tbh- it's just a string of spop gifs where i rant for way too long about the feels i get from each scene~

(-hey - i said sorry, ok ... sure, i openly admitted it was a lie - but i guess i just hoped you'd appreciate the slight effort of the pretense-)

this moment obviously kills me- just like i know it does for alotta you- but i just gotta call attention for a sec to what exactly kills me the most about it: up until this point, we've constantly been shown brief moments of catra's expression betraying her true vulnerable state - even if it's just a close-up of her eyes - during which less than a second passes before the look in them transitions from sad/hurt or disappointment/self-hatred (anything of the sort, really) to anger/ resentment/ rage. her brow usually falls quite quickly as her eyes narrow, refusing to allow her real feelings to continue just being felt - (& tbh, for most the show, i think she's just so fucking afraid of what might happen if she does let herself feel them- esp s4 after the portal)

but in this scene - that's changed. it's completely turned around, flipped upside down - she starts off w her usual habit - a display of resentment and rage - that dissolves into the most heart-breaking freaking expression i think i've ever seen. because you can see just how heart-broken she is- and it kinda seems like she's tryna admit, w/o having to say it- that she was already heart-broken for a really long time, and is tryna make one last attempt at getting adora to understand- not to choose catra- that's not the point, that's not what catra's after, even if it is what she wants and needs to know (for her own peace of mind) if the feeling is mutual-

rn, all catra is desperately tryna get adora to even just think about - is herself. take away every single person she feels responsible for - which is literally everyone.. everyone - a feeling, btw, catra now understands to be an unconscious reflex born of the trauma shadow weaver had caused adora. she's finally able to see it was never just her - adora was just traumatized far more secretively & in ways that would be harder for others to notice (which i'm sure was very much on purpose)

- the weird convos w shadow weaver, disguised as personal pep talks, looked as if they only took place when shadow weaver had adora alone - but in failsafe, catra hangs back to listen & make sure there's no bull shit going on- just like she said she would- "i'm only going to make sure shadow weaver doesn't try anything - it's not because i like you-" (yeah yeah we get it- u DoN't LiKe HeR ~ duuuh, that's cuz u luv her u dummy <3)

oh but now- now i gotta talk about THIS look right here- as if the expression they give catra when/after she asks "what do you want, adora?" isn't enough to see me out in the backyard digging my own goddamn grave- then they throw this shi on my tv screen just seconds later ?! tf. i mean- the way catra's eyes shift up- no longer able to keep looking at adora after the only answer she can give her as to what she wants is "i have to do this, catra - i'm the only one who can" ... FUUUUUUU THO OK

for so many reasons, too many for me to get into in a post i already feel bad about cause dude i ain't near done ranting on scenes and moments annnd i see how long it's already gotten- my bad, fr- so i'll just try (and fail) to narrow it down and keep it brief- catra's questioning what adora wants is definitely aimed most importantly at her hope that maybe she can still get adora to even just think about that- to realize that she's allowed to and should think about it.

but i also read it as, once again, these two knowing each other so well that they don't always have to say exactly, word for word, what they wanna ask or tell each other- the emotional stuff is weird and hard for them to even put into words still, tbh; cause i mean, ya know- orphaned child soldiers discouraged from even showing any signs of illness when sick, cause asking for medical attention would be a real loser move for a kid to make, right.. like, wtf? dude- they can take on so much and handle the gnarliest situations that require strength and skills and abilities i couldn't ever ever fucking fathom facing - but feelings? tf? all i can ever hear them thinking in response to those: "ohhh fckfckfck what is this, why is this & how do i make it stop -???"

so when catra asks adora what she wants, i mostly hear her begging adora to be a little selfish - just this once, at least - and let herself think about herself, but i also hear catra's most vulnerable, desperate, & honest ask of adora so far. what i hear woven in what catra actually says aloud, is another quiet question she's still too scared to put into words, but that i kinda think she hopes/knows adora will hear if she's really listening- "do you want me?"

uggghh and the way that after a moment of an outward, unfiltered display of grief over adora's answer (or more accurately, lack of an answer), catra wipes her eyes and turns away. the switch flipped. back on her bull shit. emotional defense mechanisms she's once again starting to feel are the right idea & always were, and is prob feeling like a fool for ever thinking she might actually get to have a life where she doesn't have to feel them as necessities - where it doesn't feel like that's the only way she'll ever survive.

cause maybe by now, she's seen that some people get to have that - but it's just not the life that was ever meant for her. just like adora was never meant to have a life of her own - at all - period. they're both still so easily fcking convinced of what they've been conditioned to believe about themselves, their lives, and the inevitabilities associated w their existence - (FUCK OFF FOREVER SHADOW WEAVER)

and the quick little moment of adora shown just after catra disappears - possibly gone from her sight forever - the shorter close-up of her reaction before the shot goes waaay back and she cries out for catra - i feel like it def doesn't get enough recognition (prob mostly due to the fact that the clip of adora yelling catra's name comes only seconds later and is portrayed far more dramatically, & in a way that crushes tf outta ur soul, ofc)

but that lil bit there- that brief second of adora's initial reaction- the moment she starts to process that catra just left- that catra's gone, and that this time- adora thinks it's probably for good- her short, shuddering intake of breath followed by what seem like more hurried, forced breaths that kinda appear difficult for her to take- sound like the first seconds of a fcking panic attack to me dude.

and it certainly hurts to watch just as much as when she calls out after catra - although yeah, tbh, that bit stings a lil extra in its own way- i mean, knowing catra had to have heard adora pretty much scream out her name seconds after she disappeared w melog- fuck. (idk how tf catra didn't come right back tbh. i'd be visible again so quick, rushin to adora like "omg bb i'm so sorry- pls don't cry, never ever, ily so much, won't ever hurt u again ok- ilysm omg omfg ily i'm so sorry" & btw, that's a totally normal thing to think when watching that scene ok-)

oh but then - omfg - adora gets a swift slap in the face from the crystal castle - the haunting of a sudden, unexpected vision of catra. all the catra's. catra in so many of the different forms adora's known her through, even if it was as enemies. it reminds me a bit of an excerpt out of the "don't go" fanfic - "catra hasn't been in her life for a long time - but she hadn't known how unbearable it would be to lose her for good until that moment" -

neither of these bitches ever wanted each other gone- catra (very sadly so) def spent most the series tryna convince herself that's how she felt about adora- tho it's just cause her conditioning taught her to think needing someone makes you weak and easy to hurt, and tbh, i think catra knew she needed adora for most their lives, even if she could never admit it to herself in even the form of a full, conscious thought--

but i think she also believed that, after the promise, that need was confirmed to be mutual. and in that way, it was something catra never needed to say but also never felt the need to be ashamed of/embarrassed by- until adora left. and her belief that the feeling of needing each other for support & protection (and let's be honest, care & affection) was mutually shared between them was shattered - & in such a way that i imagine catra musta felt like she was the actual idiot all along - adora had never needed her, and now she needed to figure out how to achieve that same independence - she needed to figure out how to not need adora.

omg tho dude - pretty sure i've said it before but i can't not say it (aka rant on it tho tbh- sorry lol) again and prob every time i ever share anything that features this couple seconds of what i kinda feel to be adora's most honest, selfish, & vulnerable moment we see up to this point- & without her needing to say a fucking thing- just tears that fall from her eyes after catra basically says "uhh yeah ok so- fuck that nonsense- i'm not leaving, idc wtf happens- i'm staying with you"

--(cause yeah, maybe she spent the last few years too prideful and stubborn to admit that was always what she wanted to do and where she loved being the most- and after so little time spent back by adora's side- it was breaking her fucking heart all over, knowing her chance at having time w adora was going away again- but regardless, catra gets now- that part's not up to her; it's never been her choice to make- & not even adora's, really- but deciding to stay w adora no matter where she goes- that's always been up to her- and she's not ever fucking making the mistake of choosing not to stay right beside that silly sweet dummy ever, eeeever again)

BUT duuude tho - the way adora cries a bit but says nothing - doesn't attempt even once to try n convince catra to go, to push her to leave and get somewhere safe - i just can't help but figure catra staying with her is exactly what she wanted, but never would've asked for in a million years. never would've even let herself form the question in her head.

but in spite of that, when catra states it unequivocally and clearly adds w confidence - "no matter what happens" - adora can't argue. she can't insist. much like catra hasn't really been able to do for quite a while now - adora can't fake it anymore. she's just too tired and she finally has to recognize she wants someone to take care of her, too - just like she's felt compelled to do for everyone else for so long. and in that moment, i feel like she's finally wordlessly admitting to catra, not only does she want her to be the one to take care of her - she needs her to be (and always has)

ahhhh but oof-baboof bro - then there's all this.

somehow, catra straight up delves deep into the abyss currently consuming adora & pretty much says - "fuck no. plsss wake up - you can't just die like this, not before you ever get a chance to live your own fcking life, good god dude - i get now why you couldn't before, but please, this time - STAY."

(huh- stay.. another way of saying "don't go"... hmmm :) <3)

these gurls literally got so much love for each other that catra is able to straight up force open an entryway into adora's fading subconscious (which seems to be the only part of her that's still alive) - just by talking to her - barely above a whisper there in the heart, but in adora's mind, she's screaming at her.

the desperate, hopeful sentiments uttered, urging adora to keep going - to push through this and come out the other side alive - to please survive because you deserve to - are just that much stronger when they come from catra- it's that loud to adora when catra is the one saying it- cause she's finally freaking realized, catra's the one she most hopes to hear it from. knowing catra feels that way about her is something she's never really had, and vice versa ofc, even when they were both in the horde. it wasn't the kind of thing they were taught to say or even acknowledge feeling - but hearing catra beg her to just stay alive - and then hearing why catra so desperately hopes for her to - adora's made certain that it really is true -

she does deserve love, and there's someone whose love she's realized she wants- and they're holding her, telling her she has it & always has. and suddenly staying isn't a hope, isn't a plea - it's an inevitability. adora ain't going nowhere--

and, so reminiscent of adora's line to catra near the end of save the cat: "c'mon catra, you've never listened to anyone in your life - are you really going to start now?" we hear catra imploring adora: "you've never given up on anything in your life- not even on me- so don't you dare start now!"

they both know each other so well, they know the best buttons to push that might just work when tryna reach each other, even when one of them is lost to the point of nearly being gone for good - they don't find a door to open - they take a saw to the fucking wall and make one. and pull the other back through. cause everything will be ok if they just stay together. and once they've both finally accepted the truth to that - that's all they wanna do, to the point of refusing to allow each other to die when faced with that possibility. and likewise, refusing to die- just knowing the other is there waiting for them, wanting them, is enough to bring them back -

wanting the life they haven't gotten to share yet, and straight up refusing to let anything take the hope of that future away - even if it means unlocking their true, innate she-ra form (and beginning to understand that they are magic & it was never about the stupid sword) - or if it's wielding some strange, mysterious power w/o prob even knowing they are- like reaching through a metaphysical doorway into the mind of the love of your life and grasping as far and as desperately as you can for their hand, trying- and succeeding- to pull them back from the brink of death.

their story is literally so lovely. & individually, they are truly such honest, raw, complex and thought-provoking characters - presented in a way that offers viewers a fairly rare experience, even these days, of seeing a story written by people willing to honor the honesty everyone deserves to see and may kinda need to see - things aren't always shiny, happy, good times & people aren't perfect- quite literally, no one is- but that doesn't mean there's no point trying. that doesn't mean there's no hope of a happy ending - or that you don't deserve one. it's literally all just part of life, part of living that you'll find yourself faced w figuring out along the way- whether the answers are good or bad. and that's an insane idea to thread into a freaking cartoon dude - wuhhh tf

oh and ps- catradora are canon. (almost wanna end every rant w this reminder lolol) ~~ they cannot be stopped, this shit won't ever be undone lmao. & that makes me wanna say- "hell yes!" and for anyone who it makes wanna say "hell no" - all i got in response to that isssss "more catradora for us then - hell yes x2"

:) <3

[cheeeeseburger]

Text me first and I'll definitely text you back

Lando Norris x Reader

Masterlist

A/N: English is not my first language, apologies for the mistakes! Enjoy!

It was 1 am, and you could not sleep. LIke at all. Your room was too hot, too stuffy, but also too cold at the same time. Your bed felt empty. To pass time, you were scrolling on your phone, when suddenly a perfect distraction popped up. It was a notification from your ex, Lando Norris. You two hadn’t talked in a hot minute.

Hey

I thought I had blocked you

Guess not

Too bad

I heard you broke up with that other guy

Yeah lol

He seemed nice tho.

Why do you care??? You didn’t even know him

Relax, I just wanted to check up on you

Well, reminding me of how great my ex was is a great way too do it, dumbass

Why are you so fucking rude to me? You’re nice to everyone

Don’t worry, all my exes get the same treatment, you’re not special xoxo

Wow ok.

Glad to see we’re on the same page!

I don’t think we are tho

What do you mean?

Idk why you’re treating me like shit

Huh? Probably cause we’re not together anymore?

You used to be so nice to me before

Are you drunk or something? Maybe high?

No?

Then why are you not getting that I’m not going to be as loving, because we BROKE UP!

You’re so mean, I don’t recognize you

Cry about it with Jay

Who tf is Jay?

The guy I just broke up with

Oh ok. Did you change your hair colour because of it?

Yeah, it’s my post break-up look.

It looks bad.

Omg, you’re calling me rude? You’re so fck rude.

Sorry, but you should go back to the colour you had when we were dating

Did you just text me at 1 am to hate on my hair? Bitch

No

If you think I’m desperate for rebound sex and I’ll fall right into your bed, you’re dreaming buddy.

I just wanted to talk to you, but I don’t even know why I bother

Idk why either tbh

Do you not want to talk to me ever again?

I mean, that was the plan lol

The two years we shared together mean nothing?

They used to, yeah. That’s called moving on.

Just like you’re going to do to that guy?

Yes. If it makes you feel better, I still sleep with your hoodie sometimes, while I threw all his stuff out.

You do? That’s cute

Don’t get any ideas. I also still have the hoodie of my boyfriend before you

Wow, you sure know how to make a guy feel special

Hey, you texted me first. Idk what you expected

I expected you to be nice to me. You used to be so sweet

Don’t worry, the other guys still find me sweet xoxo

I’m so sick of your attitude. Are you trying to make me jealous or something? Or do you just like to be a bitch to me?

You’re the mean one, actually.

I think I will block you.

Do it, pussy

I don’t ever want to talk to you again

Ok wait, no. I’m sorry, Lando. For real

Thank you, finally.

I can’t believe I’m suggesting this, but would you like to grab lunch sometime? Or coffee?

Damn, ok. I did not expect that

It’s fine if you don’t want to

No, no. I want to. What about that dinner that we used to go to? Next Thursday?

Good location, can it be Thursday in two weeks tho? I want to have time to change my hair colour lmao

Okay. I’ll see you there at 12?

See you there, Lando.

Goodnight, sweet dreams

What the hell was that?

Two weeks later, your nerves were about to be the death of you. You were pacing your bedroom, frantically picking the perfect outfit. How do you dress to impress your ex you’re sure you’re going to fall right back for? You finally ended up chosing a cute dress that gave you a great silhouette.

Little did you know, Lando was doing the same, trying to find a shirt that would make him look good for you. He really wanted to make a good impression. This was kind of an interview, and he was applying for the role of the ex-boyfriend that you want to get back with.

When you entered the dinner, the déjà vu was overwhelming. Lando was already sitting at the booth that used to be your booth, the one where you first kissed, the one where he used to let his hand slide underneath your dress. You had worn a dress with that very same memory in mind.

“Hi.” You gave him a warm smile. Gosh, he looked good. He got up to give you a small hug. He smelled even better than you remembered. He seemed to think you looked nice to, judging from his eyes that looked you up and down and his slight blush.

“Hey. You look gorgeous.” He immediately noticed your hair that you had dyed back to the colour he preferred.

“You look good too, Lando. Great, even.” He seemed pleased at your comment.

“No trouble finding the place, I hope?” You laughed at his joke and you both sat down on opposite sides of the booth.

“Don’t worry, even though you did not pick me up, we’ve been here enough that I remember the directions by heart.” You stuck your tongue at him.

“I can pick you up, next time.” His eyes were full of hope.

“Next time?” This time, it was your voice that was full of hope.

The waitress interrupted you to give you the menus. You shared a knowing smile with Lando.

“Is it still a Caesar salad for you? With a side of fries?”

“And a burger for you?” You two laughed.

“It seems like things are still the same, huh?” You rested your head on your hand to give him a dreamy look.

“They haven’t changed at all, no.” He grabbed your other hand to put it in his on the table. You felt sparks at the tip of your fingers, but they quickly moved all over your body. This was going way more smoothly than you had expected. The waitress went over to note your order, and you couldn’t help but to feel thrilled at the familiarity of it all.

“So, how have you been?” Lando asked.

“Good, good, you?” Small talk was usually difficult, but it was horrible when it was with your ex.

“Good too.” Oh no, you were not about to spend the entirety of your lunch date with basic questions.

“Listen, Lando. I wanted to apologize for the other night. I was rude for no reason, and I’m sorry.” He rubbed little circles on your hand with his thumb.

“It’s fine, really. I wasn’t so nice either.” He laughed in embarrassment, but you just smiled at him.

“So, we’re good then?” You really hoped you were.

“We are good.” You shook his hand to seal the deal. The handshake hid a thousand more meanings than just “we’re good”. It was filled with “I’m glad we’re seeing each other again” and “why did we ever stop?”. The waitress brought your food, and you ate in silence for a few minutes, just enjoying the moment.

“We should get ice cream after that,” You suggested shyly. Getting ice cream was code for “I don’t want this date to stop yet”.

“That was always the plan. I’m not a cheap date.” You laughed at him.

“It would be a crime to eat here without getting ice cream after. It was our tradition when we dated, remember?” He smiled at you.

“Of course, I remember. I also remember what came after.” You instantly blushed. A typical date for you and Lando always ended in his bed.

You finished eating. Lando picked up the bill, as usual.

“Thank you for paying, Lando. You know that it can be my turn to pay sometimes?”

“Nonsense. I’m trying to impress you. Is it working?” He smirked.

“Yeah, it’s working, baby. A little too well.” You flushed, because the word baby had slipped off your tongue so easily that you didn’t notice until you saw his face. He was clearly happy to see you using it again. When he put his hand in the small of your back to guide you towards the exit, you didn’t say anything. And when you walked towards the ice cream shop and your hands brushed, you put yours in his.

“I’m going to have a small chocolate sundae please, and he’ll have a large caramel sundae. Thank you!” You ordered the ice cream, once again remembering what you two always get.

“I’m happy that we’re out here together again,” said Lando, in a moment of vulnerability. You could not resist any longer. You grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kissed him. The kiss was sweeter than the ice cream you were about to eat. “Me too, baby. So damn happy,” you replied as you pulled away, blushing. The smile he gave you made you want to kiss him again a thousand times.

You sat near a window to enjoy your sundaes. Lando looked positively jealous of your spoon. When it was time to leave, he put your hand in his.

“I had a great time today,” he said, outside of the shop.

“Me too. Do you think we could do it again?” You asked shyly.

“Anytime.” You got on your tiptoes to lock your arms behind his neck and to kiss him. You two must have looked adorable to anyone passing by. This kiss felt exactly like the first one you and Lando shared, when you first started seeing each other. When you got back to your feet, he tucked away a few loose strands of hair behind your ear.

“I like your hair.”

“Thanks. I changed it because of you,” you replied, laughing.

“You shouldn’t have. I was just mad, the other night. You looked beautiful then too.” You looked away, embarrassed at his compliment.

“I guess I better go, then.” He immediately protested. “No don’t go yet. We can go back to my place if you’d like. Or we can just grab coffee if you prefer!” It was cute to see him rambling.

You kissed him on the cheek. “Your place is more than fine, baby.” Lando gave you a huge smile and took your hand to guide you towards his car.

“I’m glad you’re coming home with me. It’s what I was hoping for,” he said as he was opening your car door for you.

“Me too, baby. We can pick up my car tomorrow morning.” He winked at you.

“Or the next day. Or the day after.” What a flirt.

You were probably not going to stay single for very long.

[sexydoffyman]

Hello I was wondering If I could request some John Price (From Cod) x male reader who's dealing with some internalized homophobia? (Potentially with Yandere Price 😳)

INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA

navigation

genre: fluff

A/N: I love this so fucking much. Bro can sign my adoption papers. I hope I understood internalized homophobia right. I loved writing this so much.🐞

You hated yourself. Ever since you were a child, it was forced upon you. "Homosexuality is wrong" That was the sentence you heard the most around your family.

It got engraved into your brain that it is simply wrong. In your head, being a homosexual was like committing a war crime. Your head was clouded with grey smoke. Like someone had been smoking cigars in there since you remembered your first memory.

You felt like a poor excuse for a human being.

It was your fifth year working in the army now. You had a couple missions with TF 141. And the captain. His name was Price, you remembered. He was... charming... and symphatic. You found him strangely attractive.

You freaked out when that thought crossed your mind. You, attracted to a man? "No way! Never! That's wrong. Gay people are wrong."

After some time had passed, you figured it was like when a straight man says that Ryan Reynolds is hot. Yes, that was it.

Nothing else.

Nothing. else.

As time passed by, you felt daydreaming about him. You didn't find it gay. It was simple scenarios like getting saved by him. Or him carrying you... You soon realized that those scenarios weren't just daydreaming about a cool soldier. You were attracted to him.

You couldn't comprehend it. It was so wrong for you to like a man. You felt like a monster. Like a pile of shit. A pile of useless shit. You were wrong.

You hoped that no one noticed. You hoped no one knew you were wrong. You hoped he didn't know.

You thought it was just a little crush and that, in no time, you would get over it and be normal. To your surprise, this "little crush" lasted for six months. And throughout these months, you began to have little different scenarios in your head.

You imagined him cuddling you. You imagined your chests touching. You imagined how would he look naked. You imagined how would he have sex with a lady.

You knew he was a straight man. That was one of the reasons why you hoped he wouldn't find out.

Unfortunately for you, Price had noticed some of your... habits. The way you looked at him. The way you looked somewhere else when he caught you staring.

He at first thought that you were just admiring him as a more experienced soldier. He was proud of the fact he was being admired.

After a few months, he started noticing some other things about you. The way you would bite the inside of your mouth right below your lip. The way your cheeks blushed a little every time he told you "Good job, glad to have you on my team again" The way you would take any chance to make physical contact with him.

Leaning on his shoulder, tired on helicopter rides. Helping him stand up. Greeting him by patting his shoulder. Brushing your thighs against his when you sat next to each other. Letting him push you wherever he needed you to be.

He noticed how you were looser around him. You weren't tensed up with him by your side, unlike when you were tensed up with other people his rank and age.

One day, his curiosity got to him. He needed to know. He needed to know if you liked him more than just a "cool experienced soldier"

He came to your room knocking before entering. He asked you "Is there any chance you find me attractive, for professional purposes, of course."

You defended yourself. Saying that you were not a freak. He looked at you with soft, caring eyes. "That's not why I need to know, muppet" You paused for a while and began speaking again. "Why are you asking then?"

Without hesitation, he spoke, "If you like me and care about me, I want to know since I want people who care about me safe." You kept looking at him for a while, then asked. "What do you mean by like?"

Price chuckled and spoke while smiling. "If you like me as a good friend or if you have feelings for me." You didn't know what to say. Was this just a trap to make you admit that you're a freak? You thought.

You thought about what you wanted to say for a bit. You gathered up the courage to speak. "So what would you do in both of these situations?" You asked him, hoping to avoid telling him you have feelings for him you can no longer deny.

"Just tell me." Price said. "You don't have to be scared." You thought about it and decided to tell him the truth. "I probably have feelings for you." "No, not probably." "Definitely"

He smiled at you, giving off a warm energy. "I'm glad you said that." "And you know what?" You shook your head, slowly letting him talk. "I probably like you too."

Your cheeks flushed. You were confused. Why wasn't he mad at himself. Why did he say it so casually? Why did you have a problem with it in the first place?

He laughed a little. "Well, let's see what happens to this awkward relationship of ours." He said, talking about it like he was talking about a mission. He took a step forward to you, looking down at you.

He bent his knees a little and leaned down so his face was your height. He put his thumb and index finger on the side of your jaw and softly kissed the other side.

He smiled at you, tilting his hat as if saying "See you later" and left the room, closing the door behind him.

You stood in the room, and an unfamiliar feeling filled your body. Your body was filled with joy. You squeaked like a teenage boy. Your smoke-filled head had just been filled with the smoke of a different cigar.

Prices cigar.

[kiivg]

Goddard was in his 70s at the beginning of Inquisition. Is he still around and if he is, do you think he’s involving himself with Solas and his world-ending shenanigans?

.Tf u mean IF?????? ☹️ BioWare did me dirty making the game 10 years into the future.

.I’m kidding ofc he’s around!! I literally made my HoF immortal because I cannot face any of my OCs dying 🙏 tbh I don’t actually know what year DAV is set in because I’ve seen people saying 9:51 and 9:53 so 🤷‍♂️ Goddard was born in 8:70 so he’s in his eighties at least.

.So initially I was like HELL YEAH Goddard Returns!!!!! And then it’s very clear that (as I SAID) the game was basically shoehorning you into being best buddies with Solas regardless of choice and I can tell you that a) Goddard doesn’t have a clue who Solas is and b) he would absolutely kill him on sight if he was presented with a “this guy is trying to end the world” scenario. Anyway, more below 💋.

.Edit!!! Also!!!! Solas stole his fucking wedding ring!!! What the fuck!!!!! He’d beat the shit outta him!!!!!.

.A bit on Goddard’s back story; since he was away so much with the Orlesian Army and then the Fereldan Army he missed out on a lot of his kids’ childhoods, (there’s also a disconnect between him and Fulton II re: Goddard’s own relationship with his father, and then the filicide of Wakefield, and the bastard Lei appearing), and whilst he has repaired the relationships with them he still very much regrets prioritising war over his family even though he was basically taught this from childhood. Goddard was raised to be a tyrant and warmonger, he was made for fighting in wars and winning them. However! He now has the chance to get to spend time with him family, since the Inquisition is over, he handed his army to the Divine, he’s made reparations to the Baroulx family, and he’s absolute besties with Emperor Gaspard.

.Since the end of Inquisition, he’s been retired, he has ten grandchildren and nine great grandchildren, he went back to ruling his bannorn for a few years, then passed it over to Twyla (his eldest child), and decided he’d rather just do whatever the hell he wants now. He still fights, sparring and what not to keep in shape, he might be old but he’s not going to just crumple into dust!! Also considering I have Goddard II (Twyla’s Grandson/Gylda’s First Born) bethrothed to Gaspard’s daughter Lienne. (they are however children atm), he’s spending a lot of time in Orlais.

.I do think he gets roped back into things when he’s in Orlais. I think Hawke is the first one to realise shit is going down, and since he’s friendly with both Andrastopher (HoF) and Goddard, he kind of gathers them in preparation for something to happen (Varric’s letters grow increasingly worrying). Which means they’re all in Orlais together when shit hits the fan. Also there, is Lei (Goddard’s bastard son and Andrastopher’s Warden Second), and he is tasked with seeing how things are going in the north after Morrigan turns up for aid; after all Lei is a Grey Warden, half-Dalish, and son of the Herald of Andraste. He’s also a pretty good guy and overall trustworthy etc etc. a HUNK lbh.

.(On a side note, I’m 90% sure the Crossroads are like really exhausting to traverse for anyone who isn’t an elf so idk how anyone non-elven is chilling there??? But that’s another factor in Lei going. I’m not reading TME again just to check, but… I should…. For Gaspard 🥴🫶).

.So Goddard just liaises with his son throughout the whole thing, and trusts him entirely to do the right thing. He’s busy fighting for Gaspard, corralling the old Inquisition back together to aid Orlais knowing that Andrastopher is pulling together Ferelden’s armies at the same time. Hawke on the other hand absolutely legs it to Starkhaven to be with Sebastian (oh HC that this is why Starkhaven has the best survival in the Free Marches; Hawke forewarned them) even though their relationship is hush hush 🤫.

.I think Goddard would desperately want to return to Ostwick to be with his family during Veilguard but Twyla has a hand on things and he trusts her implicitly. Also he would look like a mad coward if he left lmao, can you imagine?? Herald of Andraste fleeing home when things get bad????.

.I do like the idea of all four of them getting together post Veilguard, because a) Andrastopher has slept with both Farid (Rook) and Doherty Hawke, b) Doherty would absolutely be mad at Farid for that thing that happens, c) Farid would be mad at Goddard for working with Solas in the first place, d) Goddard and Andrastopher already have beef over their sons anyway, like?? Hello smth is gonna happen with these four guys lbh.

.I do want to say originally Farid was going to be Goddard’s son, as he did have a liaison with a woman at some point before having children with Yetta (his wife) but it would make Farid too old so 🤷‍♂️ then I thought woag what if he was Gaspard’s bastard, and then I couldn’t because it would be borderline ??? Because Farid’s half brother Jean-Esmeral would be sleeping with Gaspard without knowing that their mother had also slept with him several times decades prior and had baby Farid together 😬🙂‍↔️ no thanku.

.The main thing is they’re all safe and sound 🙏 and even if I do love the idea of a last stand in Amaranthine/Starkhaven/Orlais, broken the moment Farid does his thing with the Veilguard ykno ykno, they’re still all safe 🙂‍↕️🫶💕.

[restinslices]

This one's majorly because I want your funny take on it bc my mind can't decide LMAO. Could I request LKBS when their daughter or kid is being flirted with/asked out. I majorly think Bi-Han would tweak tf out but pretend he isn't buuut- I'm here for your take on it!

My bad for the wait anon. I've been sick for over a week and I was tryna wait for it to pass but it's still here sooo imma stop waiting and thug it out. My body hates me. I'm typing this on my phone and tumblr is so glitchy on here. Imma start biting my walls-

Bi-Han is for sure tweaking on the inside

It's not even just the fact that his daughter is being flirted with. It's the fact that this is happening IN FRONT of him

That gif is what he wants to do

Now do I think Bi-Han is like "oh my little girl can NEVER date?

No.

Do I think that he thinks dating shouldn't be their priority?

Yes.

She should focus on other things he deems important before getting distracted and dating

Bi-Han would just be standing there like the Hash Slinging Slasher while this rando is flirting with his daughter

If she starts flirting back, which she probably would, I could legit see him walking over and making his presence known

The poor teenagers-

"Bàba this is Dylan" "Hi Mr-"

Bi-Han grabs his daughter by the top of the head and starts walking away

It doesn't hurt. He just has a very firm hold and is like "we're going this way"

The absolute audacity to flirt in front of him? What happened to respect? Decorum?

Back in his day, he would NEVER do such a thing in front of his father. And he let that bitch die.

"Hey! Why did you do that?" "That boy is no good for you" "You don't even know him!" "Look at his arms. They're skinny. He can't protect you. He'd be dead weight"

Wow. I always love our talks Bi-Han :D

I don't think Kuai Liang would start tweaking, but I think he shares the same views as Bi-Han

There's just certain things he thinks is inappropriate to do in front of parents

And by "in front of parents" these two mean "in the same area". Doesn't matter if they're on the other side of the room

"Harumi, who is that boy?" "That's Dylan! Him and (name) are rather close" "Oh so she told you about Dylan but not me?

I don't think he necessarily wants to pull her away, but he would wanna make his presence known

Y'all know how some dads are with their daughters. She's his Princess and the thought of her growing up tugs at their heart

He wants to go over and stop the whole scene but Harumi tells him no

So instead he pretends he's not staring but definitely is

This mf has the most intense gaze as he's watching them. Harumi got a tight grip on him. She needs a damn leash

At some point his daughter and Dylan (idk why this name is sticking-) look over

He's just standing there... menacingly!

"Um, Dylan, I gotta go. I don't think my dad is happy"

Meanwhile "See what you did?" "I'm just standing here"

Exactly. You're just standing there and being a creeper

If this mf dies in Khaos Reigns, y'all are never seeing me again

Moving on-

I'm not exactly sure how Tomas would react

On one hand, he's grown up with Kuai Liang and Bi-Han, so he probably shares some of the same ideas and mentality

On the other hand, I just don't see him having a strong reaction

He prefers if this wasn't happening in front of him, but he kinda knows that teens don't be thinking fr

One thing's for certain though, he better not see SHIT become physical over there

No shoulder touching, no hand touching, no kissing, no hugging for too long-

It's just a bit too much

Tries to act like he's doing other shit but his eyes keep darting

Like bitch you're never pretending to be counting leaves. Didn't think this through, did you?

I can imagine his daughter looking over and being like "Hey papa! What are you doing?

"Nothing. Me? Haha... just hanging around"

"Would you like to meet Dylan?" "Well if you insist"

Actually talks to Dylan

Yay!