#i have mixed feelings about the movie but i love the marketing so much

[genre]

"I saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy."

Longlegs (2024) dir. Osgood Perkins

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

OMG RAVEN YOU’RE INTO EVER AFTER HIGH? I love it but can’t talk about it bc none of my friends have seen it 😭 I wish it was talked about more, especially with how deep their lore runs. I love EAH’s dynamics with the complexities of destiny. If twst followed the same logic as eah’s world it would be so interesting. How would you feel if the worlds were to mesh together and how it would work? You can interpret that in any way you want; the characters meeting or twst being bound to the same rules and societal expectations of eah, or whatnot.

Also who’s your favorite eah character compared to your favorite twst character (Leona)?Jade, right?

And have you read the eah books? I haven’t, but I’m going to try to sometime!

Eah alt account when?

I'm still salty that the Monster High x Ever After High crossover movie never saw the light of day-- Part of the reason why I don't like Disney (I mean the faceless corpo, not all Disney products) is because they have such a strong association with fairy tales that it pushes other interpretations out of the market or it leads to people assuming Disney "owns" those fairy tales. Ever After High's lore and themes run so much deeper than most other fairy tale reimaginings I've seen (and I've seen a lot). It's such a shame it doesn't get the respect and recognition it deserves even though EAH is the one out here challenging the status quo whereas modern Disney is content with mediocrity that appeals to the masses.

I think EAH and TWST, at their cores, share similar ideas so combining them would work well. Friendship, self-identity, defining your own future, questioning what "good" and "evil" truly are... It's all there. I'd imagine that if Twisted Wonderland (or at least NRC) followed the same rules as EAH, then everyone would be descendants of their Disney counterparts. (This is actually a common misperception of what TWST was to new fans; people mistakenly believe the TWST characters are children of the classic Disney villains. This has never been canon.) Unfortunately, I'd have to take away the Disney villains being twisted to be "good" guys in Twisted Wonderland's world in order for this to work by EAH rules, so... There's that to consider. This, in turn, can result in the student body splitting into Royals (pro-following one's destiny) and Rebels (anti-following one's destiny). Perhaps RSA and NRC could be one school in this AU...? Just so we have a mix of "good" and "evil" descended children in the same vicinity as one another. A must-have are the constantly bickering Narrators!! It's only really when Yuu shows up that the majority opinion starts to shift. Maybe then Crowley becomes concerned with students rising up and fighting back against the system that relies on them being complacent to keep the cycle of stories going. I've seen some readings of EAH which theorize that Royals guaranteed a happy ending is a stand-in for privilege, and that interpretation leads into very interesting conflicts when we also consider that magic in Twisted Wonderland is a privilege afforded to few.

To cover just the dorm leaders (because covering all the TWST characters would make this post way longer), I definitely see Riddle, Kalim, Idia, and Malleus as Royals and Leona, Azul, and Vil as Rebels. Here's my thought process:

Riddle is pretty self-explanatory. He comes from a background where he's used to being told what to do by his mother and so he also heavily relies on her strict, unyielding teachings to play by the book when he goes out there in the real world. Riddle is inflexible and hesitant to go against the grain--and, more importantly, he fully believes that following the rules will lead to his happiness... that doing as his fairy tale ordains will lead to a happy ending. What happens to the Queen of Hearts is dubious in the end since it's framed as Alice's dream, so I think that vagueness gives Riddle hope that by behaving himself, he'll earn the happiness he desires.

Leona is a Rebel, and not just because that's the aesthetic of his dorm. Being that he is highly intelligent and demonstrates a lot of foresight, he'd be aware of what future is in store for him and aggressively fighting against that. It would make him more desperate than ever to prove his worth, because not only does everyone see his powers as terrifying, but they also see him as a future brother murderer and dictator that will bleed the land dry of resources. It'd make the situation with his family even more strained than it already is, not to mention the extra jealousy he must feel toward Cheka, who is still too young to understand what's going to happen later.

Azul is someone who acts like a Royal but is actually a Rebel. He acts polite and like he plays by the rules, but clearly he doesn't behind the scenes. I see Azul as the kind of Rebel akin to Duchess Swan... as in, he believes he can steal away someone else's destiny for himself. Azul would constantly be looking for loopholes to save himself. He's put way too much stock into becoming a better, stronger person and he'd want to defend this new life he has made for himself. His obsession with protecting his contracts could translate well here.

Kalim is a Royal because he's mega rich and has been sheltered from the concept of bad things that happen to normal people; he has nothing to worry about. It also helps that Kalim is twisted from a character that doesn't meet a bad ending. I think he'd be aware of Jami's doomed destiny, but Kalim is so ignorant that he thinks it'll just be fine and it'll work itself out. Part of his growth could be being forced to reckon with the reality that Jamil is suffering under the legacy assigned to him and accepting the role that he plays in that by not acting.

Idia is a Royal--or at least pre-book 6 Idia is. He's a very pessimistic guy and repeatedly expresses hopelessness about the future, bemoaning the curse he and his family have to bear. Idia doesn't want to try to fight his fate, he's already accepted that it will happen and so closes himself off from others to save himself that heartbreak. Post-book 6 Idia will have swapped over to the Rebel side thanks to Ortho reviving the hope in him.

Vil is a Rebel simply for the fact that he fights social conventions. He's already out here shattering gender roles, but finds it much harder to breach that expectation that villains are just villains and nothing more. Vil keeps getting rejected at every turn, told that it's impossible to rewrite his story, that his frustrations are the natural result of jealousy and an ugly heart that festers in side of him. He steels himself to prove that notion wrong, working himself to the bone to get up on that stage and stay on it, waiting to be lavished with praise that he truly is the fairest one of all. I feel this would be so fascinating for Vil's own arc about self acceptance; maybe he wears himself down emotionally because he HAS to basically be perfect due to his job but also denies himself normal feelings like anger and jealousy because confessing that you have such "ugly" feelings only validates that you're shallow just like the stories say you will be.

Malleus is a tough one, but I settled for Royal in the end. Maleficent is doomed to be slain by a sword, right? So am I saying that THE Malleus Draconia, who is infamously arrogant about his magical abilities, would lie down and take a stab like that? Of course not! However, I do think that Malleus is initially someone who values tradition and living up to noblesse oblige. As the future ruler of a nation, people's stories are relying on him to play his expected role out, which he'd be fully cognizant of. I also think Malleus would be afforded the luxury of not having to face his destiny as soon as his peers are due to his long life span. This is in part because the person destined to slay him doesn't come into his life for literally hundreds of years. Then when book 7 arrives, Malleus has to deal with his loved ones leaving and/or betraying him as well as the realization that this is his destiny: dying alone and unloved. That'd just break him.

ahdbiqwdbqwli I COULD TALK ABOUT THIS AU FOR FOREVER BUT I'LL CUT IT SHORT OR ELSE I'LL NEVER SHUT UP 😭

EAH has so many good characters and interesting storylines, it's hard for me to pick a favorite! I of course love Apple and Raven's dilemmas, but I feel like it's cheating to pick one of them as my favorite. The whole Wonderland gang is also fantastic... I'm a sucker for their aesthetic, but they're so fun and silly in general. Kitty, Lizzie, and especially Madeline are 👌

Mmm, when I think long and hard about it, I think my favorite EAH character has to be Briar Beauty, daughter of Sleeping Beauty. Firstly, I love all the pink, roses, and bramble in her design. Secondly, I love the layers to why she is the way she is. Briar's a party girl not because "lmao, wouldn't that be a funny haha subversion of Sleeping Beauty" but because she wants to live life up before she falls asleep for 100 years and literally loses all her friends and family to the natural passage of time. That's seriously so smart and such an inventive way to think about the trauma a descendant of Sleeping Beauty might have. Seeing Briar transition from one of Apple's besties and biggest supporters to an outright rebel is satisfying as heck. (Gotta take a moment to shout out this classic moment :3)

I don't know if I would compare Briar to Jade since they're entirely different characters. However, looking at the source material, I'm actually surprised I like Briar as much as I do since I have never cared for the story of Sleeping Beauty. A part of me finds this ironic since Malleus harbors a similar fear as Briar (losing loved ones) yet I see Malleus's desire as way more selfish and self-serving than Briar's. I believe that's because Briar doesn't have the same arrogance as Malleus, so I'm more forgiving with her. EAH's actual equivalent to Malleus is Faybelle, daughter of the Dark Fairy, but I don't like her as much as I do Briar (hence why I'm comparing Malleus and Briar, not Malleus and Faybelle).

I haven't read the EAH books but I want to one day! I'd prefer to borrow them since I don't have enough space in my room for more physical books, so as soon as I find copies at a library or something...

This blog has kind of become a place where I occasionally talk about my other interests, generally as it relates to TWST, my main interest. I'd like to keep it like this since managing multiple blogs can be so draining. It already takes quite a bit of time to regularly write responses to asks just on one blog!

[punkeropercyjackson]

It's finally here!!!

Graphic design is my passion LMFAO but as i said i would do a while back,i've created a masterpost of all the Jason Todd content that's worth your time!This is rather long but he's existed since 1983 so!!

Base edit is my little sister @mayameanderings and tagging @coffeemilkcatz and @nanaonmars since they said yes when i asked if they wanted me to!Let's dive in then!

Batman 408-426,Detective comics 568-582,Superman annual 11,New Teen Titans 18-31,Blue Devil 19,Action comics 556 and 594,Batman Annuals 10-12 and Batman(The cult)for pre-reboot Robin!Jason my beloved

Nightwing Year One 101-106,New Teen Titans 55,Nightwing 10(1997)and Legends of the Dark Knight 100 for Dick and Jason siblinghood,Gotham Knights 34 for the short story of him and Alfred and Detective comics 790 for Bruce telling Cass about him as it takes place on Jason's birthday

Lost Days aka the Red Hood prologue

Under The Red Hood(2010)-The original comic is good in it's own right but the movie is leagues better written(Rare comic book adaption exception lmao)

Robin 177 and 182-183 for the actual Tim and Jason beef instead of 'replacement' and 'enemy to caretaker' bs

Azreal:Death's Dark Knight 3(Can't give commentary on this one since i don't know Azreal like that,sorry)

Red Hood and The Outlaws(2016).Unlike the Utrh comic vs the Utrh movie,the original Rhato has nothing positive like the reboot

Not TECHNICALLY Jason BUT Duke is his favorite brother and Stephanie's the only Batfam girl he's truly close to so you should also stan them since he'd want you to /lh

Red Hood:Outlaw for the confirmation that Red Hood loves black women from infinity to infinityyyyy(meaning his love interest Dana Harlowe is introduced and featured as an mc in this run)

Urban Legends 1-6 for his return to the Batfam-Messy tbh but i do enjoy parts of it!

Task Force Z for him and Stephanie being a vigilante team and it has a prelude,that being Detective comics 1041-1043

Unkillables and Joker:The Man Who Stopped Laughing for Jayrose goodies and more of the above

Gotham War if you feel like turning off your brain to look at good art and laugh at dogshit writing

Red Hood:The Hill is his current run and when our queen Dana comes home from comics limbo!!!

The following is a misc list that's not required to include in your Jason knowledge but HIGHLY recommended you do just for fun!

Tiny Titans 23,29,33,39,45 and 47,Bombshells 46,60 and 62,Bombshells United 18-24,Lego Batman:Family Matters,A Death In The Family 2020,Batman:The Adventures Continue,Batman/Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 5-6,The Doom That Came to Gotham 2023 and The Teen Titans Go episode 'The Best Robin'(Pre-Reboot Robin Jason rights!!!).Also look up 'Nobody cares about Tim Drake' if you don't know what that is,you'll love it

Jason also appears in the Lego DC Super Villains games that i highly recommend as well especially because my girlfriend is a mega fan of it and i don't know much about Lego Batman 3:Beyond Gotham but please avoid the aformentioned original Rhato,Red Hood:Outlaws and the Gotham Knights game as they feature extremely problematic writing not limited to but including racialized misogyny and ableism and do disservice to Jason himself anyway so you wouldn't want to consume them to begin with if you want to like him.I have mixed feelings on the Arkham Knight and Injustice games series' but they are objectively fairly good so i wouldn't say no to giving them a shot to see if you like them

And for the finale we have Wayne Family Adventures-Definitely a good read but to be totally honest it does Duke DIRTY and it sucks so much of DC to have marketed as his series to not only not follow through at all and make it an ensemble cast instead but ALSO deprive him of his actual characterization and story to make him a demure weak black boy stereotype.I won't judge you at all for liking it if you decided to read it or have already but kindly keep this in mind and consider joining me and my mutuals in our rewrite of it to give our Signal of Hope and Chaos the writing he deserves or at least support us through likes and reblogs!Happy Jason readings and have a good day💕

[enlightenedrobot]

On Harry Potter Syndrome

Whenever there's a milquetoast protagonist surrounded by infinitely more interesting side characters and is easily overshadowed by their actual sidekicks, I call that "Harry Potter Syndrome" and tbh I think it should catch on. Here's some examples.

Fandom(!) Danny is so much more interesting, and tbh, a kid growing up with ghost hunting parents shoulda turned out a lot weirder. Perfect example of Harry Potter Syndrome.

I love you Sora. I love you and your simple/ clean mind. I love how you tear through eldritch abominations with the power of both Love and also blunt force trauma. I also love how you objectively have the least amount of personal trauma and drama out of all of the playable characters in the games you started and I hope the lovecraftian terror of the circumstances surrounding your story never truly register as anything other than a fun adventure to your untainted, rarely used twink brain.

And yet everyone else in the series including the fucking mouse has enough backstory and angst to fill up an entire library with journals of badly written emo poetry or better yet thirteen games with the audacity of pretending to be a trilogy.

Yes, Kingdom Hearts suffers from Harry Potter syndrome, but it's also proof that that might not necessarily be a bad thing.

You guys, Madoka is so good. I swear it's a lot more than just an edgy Magical Girl show. It has amazing art that makes use of mixed media in a really creative way. It's also dark and surreal and surprisingly reminiscent of movies like Donnie Darko and Carrie. It's also incredibly gay.

And Madoka is likable enough, I guess. But also... if I had to nitpick anything about the show, it's that she's also kinda sorta boring? I mean, it is kinda funny seeing an adorable pink haired teenager earnestly talk about desiring "more power". But still.

A New Hope is probably the movie that inspired thousands of other cases of Harry Potter Syndrome, including Harry Potter himself, though I feel the need to point out how deliberate it is with it.

Luke is the Protagonist of the movie, unambiguosly. That's him front and center of the poster, and he's the guy who follows the hero's journey and ultimately comes out looking like the hero in all of this. But he's also not the sole viewpoint character of the film, and I think it's pretty telling that the first third of the movie takes place from the POV of a pair of gay married robots.

Depending on the scene, we take on the POV of either Luke, R2-D2, C3PO, Han Solo, Tarkin, or Princess Leia. Of these characters Luke undeniably fills in the role of milquetoast hero, but George Lucas understood the power of a good ensemble cast from the movie's inception.

And finally

Let's face it, this movie suffers so hard from Harry Potter syndrome, the marketing guys just said "fuck it" and put Johnny Depp on the poster instead.

[absoluteabsolem]

okay guys i'm having a brainrot on my way to work about goncharov bc of all your sexy meta posts but i haven't seen a single one talking about the flowers in this film so indulge me

so i'm a florist right ? my n°1 passion when i watch a movie or a show is to trashtalk the flowers bc 99,9% of the time they look like shit. like. i made better arrangements during my first year of training. it makes me sad. yes goncharov is a brilliant film in itself but it gets a whole star just for the fucking flowers (i can't find the florist in the end credits if anyone knows pls tell me ??)

like we're talking thierry boutemy in marie-antoinette (2006) levels of artistry. all the arrangements are so BEAUTIFUL and i'm gonna talk about them. it will ofc mostly be about katya lmao bc men yet have to express themselves through delicate floral jewellery (i wish they did though. i am waiting). katya doesn't have that many lines for a main character but her presence and the colours speak for themselves. sorry i'm on mobile i don't have any pictures

alright so of course you have the wedding. everything is so fucking opulent it's a cascade of wealth you have almost no foliage at all except eucalyptus and that shit is expensive. there are more peonies than you could ever count and the roses are soooo beautiful (i think most of them are juliet peach roses but i can't be 100% sure) like. i could smell it from my couch it was as if i was there aaaa the fucking wax flowers and scabiosas i love scabiosas so much !! and the perfect balance between flowers of different sizes !!! it was wonderful i mean you've seen them

but what i love about these arrangements is that they're all in white and yellow. it's an unusual combo for a wedding even if white is a classic wedding colour in western cultures and yellow isn't so weird at the heart of summer. yellow is however also the colour of jealousy and betrayal and idk if you ever noticed but andrey's boutonniere is the ONLY ONE that is just yellow. you don't have the white carnation (associated with love. screaming) on it like everybody else. also note that katya's bouquet is only white which is all about purity elegance etc. i do think however that the colours of andrey and katya's flowers on that day are more about the way goncharov feels about them at that point in the story, rather than their own feelings.

we also see katya wear several decorated combs in her hair throughout the film (idk enough about hair stylism to comment of the haircuts themselves so i'll stick to the flowers). the first we see are pretty simple and not rly noticeable, white and pastel pink, typical discreet but feminine stuff. p much like the rest of her wardrobe up until the boat scene where things get interesting.

this is where katya meets sofia who is wearing that rly fucking gorgeous burgundy (ambition, power and wealth) dress and look i know monica bellucci can wear anything and be beautiful but fucking hell. i mean i'm gay but i briefly questioned myself for a second there. anyway. the boat shenanigans happen and once katya goes back home and pretends she didn't almost get fucking killed, the flowers in her hair are burgundy. i mean i know we have the fruit market a bit later but the comb is what sold me on that ship. i see you katya

when she almost shoots goncharov (if we were rly in love you wouldn't have missed AAAAAAA i'm normal) she has a super pretty mix of blue hydrangea/eucalyptus in her hair. blue is the colour of control and tranquility and i thought it was very sexy of her. she still has them when sofia leaves her and i love how you can see the tears about to fall down her cheeks but she doesn't allow it. things got out of hand but she's not willing to lose control of herself in front of sofia and i think ultimately it's what fucked things up between them but i try not to think about it too hard

what DOES however keep me awake at night is that martin scorsese rly thought it was okay to have red bouquets everywhere made in the exact style of goncharov and katya's wedding in goncharov's home when andrey shows up to kill him. i mean the subtext isn't even subtext at this point it's like saying point break isn't gay but the flowers are the fucking cherry on top. andrey shoots him and he doesn't miss because he loves him and in case you're too dense to understand that here is a decadent display of red and burgundy. it is the colour of love it is the colour of violence and in their case one simply does not go without the other and i am so fucking normal about this

[glittertomb]

Current Obsessions 🌸🍄🐸💜🌿🌼

(Haven’t done one in 3 years, I think, and I have half an ounce of energy right now but here goes)

Scavengers Reign… an animated science-fiction show about a beautiful but dangerous planet with unusual biological mechanisms… watch for free here

Winternight Trilogy… a historical fantasy series spun with Russian fairytales, old gods, and curious creatures… rent on Libby with a library card

The Boy and the Heron… I know the latest Ghibli got some mixed reviews, but I’m just giddy to have another super magical film from our favorite Japanese retiree, and understanding how this film relates to his legacy and his son makes it much more emotional for me… it will be on Max at some point or watch for free on fmoviesz.to

Southern Reach Trilogy… I realized that the Annihilation movie was loosely based off of these books, so I had to know more about this quarantined (but ever-expanding) area where strange and psychedelic phenomena occurs… these are probably also on Libby

The Scholomance Trilogy… re-reading one of my favorite magical series in which students navigate a deadly world where monsters and even their own school seem to be coming for them at every turn… the first audiobook is available for free with a Spotify premium account, or just find them on Libby lol

Dave the Diver… explore the deep seas by day, run a sushi restaurant by night, and more… I dunno, I play it at my sister’s house so go look for it on Steam

This last one is kinda random but I’ve been really into Ito En teas at the moment… I usually get the giant bottles of unsweetened green tea from my local Asian markets… I’ve also been drinking a lot of giant bottles of unsweetened Aloe because I’m a giant ball of inflammation but I couldn’t find my brand.

So, the end! I hope these give you comfort as we wait for spring! If you’ve been feeling gloomy, stir-crazy, or otherwise glum, remember to keep taking your vitamin D and keep your chin up, cause spring is so close we can almost taste it. 🌸 ~love, laue

[storygirl000]

okay genuinely what is with some of the complaints for mh g3 because at this point it just sounds like y’all hate it for existing and nothing else.

"ewwww the outfits are so ugly!!" gee, it’s almost like popular fashion trends have changed over the years. there’s a difference between "this outfit is ugly" and "i greatly dislike this outfit"; i personally think a lot of the outfits look pretty cool, but i’m not gonna default to calling the ones i don’t like "ugly" just because i don’t like the style.

"everyone’s personality has changed for the worse!!" because it’s a reboot of the franchise; of course they’re gonna change things to keep things "fresh". besides, i honestly think the personality changes got me more invested in certain characters compared to g1 – frankie and lagoona in particular are characters i didn’t care all that much about in g1, but i’ve loved their g3 characterizations so far.

"it’s racist because they toned down clawdeen’s blackness!!" i am admittedly as white as can be so i don’t know how well i can comment on this, but i feel like people who use this argument have a tendency to sound more bigoted than they claim mattel is. i have both g1 and g3 clawdeen dolls; they have pretty much the exact same skin tone, so that complaint only really applies to the live-action movie. the arguments about her personality being "less black" sound like they’re turning into "clawdeen is less of a sassy black woman stereotype and i hate that". and all the complaints about her being mixed race (and thus "less black") now just sound bigoted against actual afro-latina people. and that’s without getting into how this old argument keeps being used while they ignore that there’s a wider degree of racial diversity in the line, that clawdeen actually has a black va now (light-skinned black, sure, but still an improvement over having a white va do a "black" voice), and that some of y’all made fun of the new venus for looking different when they gave her implicitly black facial features.

and on that note, "you’re just sucking mattel’s dick and ignoring everything bad because there’s more diversity now!!" so people aren’t allowed to be happy that they’re being properly represented in their favorite doll line now? so plus-sized people aren’t allowed to be happy about plus-sized catty? so south asian people can’t be happy that abbey is now properly south asian-coded instead of weirdly russian? so i can’t be happy that one of the characters is explicitly autistic? sure, a story should have more than good diversity if it wants to be truly good, but every time i see this complaint get brought up it’s phrased like we shouldn’t be happy about the increased diversity at all.

"this is just as bad as g2!! why don’t you hate it like g2?!" because it’s not like g2 at all. g2 suffered from a combination of budget cuts that led to cheaper doll designs and marketing unsure of whether or not it was connected to the original g1 continuity; g3, while not perfect, definitely has a better budget and marketers who’ve learned from their mistakes and made it more clear that this is a full reboot.

and all of these complaints seem to carry an undercurrent of "g3 is the only option available and it’s bad" which...just isn’t true. g1 fans still have stuff like the boo-riginal creeproductions, the reel drama dolls, and so many special dolls that hearken back to g1 aesthetics and designs. mattel’s still paying attention to them.

tl;dr stop using increasingly flimsy arguments to justify complaining about people liking something.

[tomyo]

Nimona and a Decade of the Queer Experience

To me one of the most anticipated aspects of the Nimona adaptation was to see how they changed the a lot of the queer themes from the original comic. Nimona was created in a time where it was still taboo to represent same sex relationships in anything trying to be marketable into an era where it is so commonplace that Nimona would have seemed regressive if it stayed true to the material.

Naturally the way Blackheart and Goldenloin are portrayed has greatly changed but also has a lot of the message from the original. Nimona is now about the trans experience.

This isn't to say transness was never at the core of Nimona but I don't think even baby nonbinary me would have been able to connect it directly to that.

Nimona the comic, to me, deals with similar but different issues from Nimona the movie. The comic was a story of trying to upheave an untrustworthy militarized state through the initially goofy lens of a budding father daughter relationship that ultimately fails.

Blackheart at the start of the comic already is trying to defy the government and Nimona seeks him out because he's actually playing the role of the villain already. She herself felt like this mix of female and queer rage. It made believe somewhat in the idea that the little girl by the end of the story was truly her who had once tried to do better for her home and was rejected for becoming something *different*. Overall you can feel more presently that deafening dread that Blackheart and Goldenloin love each other and acknowledging that would ruin both of their lives. This is moreso due to that whole conflict of their ideologies and sides they are on interfering but the metaphor is there. We could read this easily as Blackheart being out of the closet and at odds with society where Goldenloin on in the closet and working on the name of oppression. By showing Blackheart looking visibly like a villain it harkens back to the queer coding of Disney villains and a feeling a lot of queer people had to experience at that time, being an enemy to the public simply for existing. Coming back to Nimona, she's the perfect example of a trans masc egg experience; punk in a way that isn't fully certain in embracing or trashing anything feminine. Not fully androgynous but butchy and an unfocused anger at everything around them. I can never speak for the entirety of the trans experience but I know the feeling being born in an afab body and violently hating the society that I want badly to accept me, the way we insist that we intend to fully express our being while also creating this weird mix of unconvincing conformity. Again I laugh so much at her design elements; shaved head, tomboyish in chainmail but with curves, and short dresses, and impractical belts. Her actions also read as someone who's greatest sore point is loss of her bodily autonomy which ultimately she's subjected to during the climax. The monster/power of Nimona to me tends to ultimately mirror more of an emotional state rather than transness itself. Both version of Nimona have people see it as something Nimona is inflicted with rather than a part of her existence as she reveals at the end. Even Blackheart believe he can cure her of it with the equivalence of a procedure or medication but it's because he only perceives Nimona as the little girl and not the little girl as a part of the whole that is the dragon. I think there is a lot of things we can read into the dragon being and even at the idea that queerness is something people seek to cure that doesn't need one in the first place. And ultimately that's why the story ends on the somber tone it does, the biggest focus of the story was how Blackheart became the parent to Nimona and misguidedly tried to 'fix' her. And like a lot of people, especially for the time period, Nimona had to leave behind the family and society that couldn't accept her as her.

And so we move forward through the years.

Media is not made in a vacuum, Nimona the comic is a critique of early 2010s ideologies and maybe doesn't even worry about them as serious in a pre 2016 world. Nimona 2023 however exists on the other side of that threshold. Like I said, I don't think the original comic was consciously trans mostly because the zeitgeist wasn't conscious of transness. 2012-2014 (the comic's creation period) encapsulated me personally going from no aware knowledge of gender to confusion at learning my friend's pronouns to fully identifying as nonbinary in a world few people knew what that meant. But not long after that we had Korra's ending, the reveal of Ruby and Sapphire, Kaitlynn Jenner, Menanists, and then the nightmare of the 2016 election and all that came with it. The truth is a contradiction occurred; queerness became a part of the in group so long as it followed the rules of heteronormativity. I think it is fair to say a lot of queer people became more eeeh conservative for lack of better terms. For once we finally had a chance to be out and so long as we followed the conditions set out, exist well. We can live comfortably, why rock the boat? In other words, respectability politics. We are then at odds with those who believe we should keep complacent for fear of being rejected.

That brings us to Nimona the movie.

Blackheart no longer is the guerilla activist he once was, we now are introduced to him as a part of the system; specifically the model minority. Movies only have so much time for you to build understanding of it's world themes and ideas and so it tends to need to be more punchy with getting the point across otherwise become less coherent. So rather on the nose "Knighting a non noble is against god" as very flatly stated in the begging. Since the time of the comic, being gay has been normalized and we now see Blackheart and Goldenloin start out as a couple (to be frank I couldn't fully tell if they were official or not but they were all but in writing together) and by in universe logic, Goldenloin is the golden child pastor's son with divisively accepted boyfriend. Blackheart is an inspiration for his common men while his noble classmates are disgusted at the idea of him being allowed the same rights as them, essentially being allowed to be an policeman. It's his role as the model minority that he still believes the system is right when he is framed for murder; it is the one bad actor who's at fault despite a whole society shunning him with little reasoning needed.

Nimona in the other hand is a bit more in control of the relationship. Nimona of the comic latched onto a spurned man who was more methodical than she was in her work but Nimona of the movie is pretty much what pushes Blackheart into the image of a villain. Movie Nimona's goal is more or less to find community and for reasons we will get to only believes she can find it with other cast aside from society. She is jaded enough to know that Blackheart will continue to be labeled as the way they do to her. This time the shape shifting is explicitly trans; Nimona now is no longer worried about experimentation or trying to be cured but of being called a monster, the fear of her, and eradication; words I feel like I've heard too much in lgbt spaces lately. She talks about wanting her own demise with her heard turned down and eyes somber in moments that hit too close to home. She is a worn down warrior for her own existence. On safer grounds with Blackheart she more wittingly challenges his transphobia. Blackheart cannot perceive her out of the binary that she is default a girl and her transformations are something else, he asks if her transitions hurt, and he tries to convince her to blend in with others for his own comfort. As he spends more time with her, he's able to view the world he was taught differently and doesn't view the less pretty sides of Nimona as scary. However, programming is hard to free yourself out of.

The Director is by definition, conservative. She believes is a religious like text that society should not change unless it all falls a part. Her belief in this runs so deep that she easily is willing to kill pseudo religious figures as her personal code of morals override any actual logic in faith(anyone remember how magas talk about Trump as being sent by God while also disavowing him for encouraging vaccinations?). Her rhetoric that non nobles with be a societal slip eminates classism and racism (commoner is somewhat of a race allegory). She denies her own words to hold power, criticizes Nimona of whispering deceipt into blackhearts ear while actually being the one doing so to Goldenloin, and justifies her actions through holy scripts. She holds a stern belief in cleansing the society of it's demons down to intending to kill a large part of her society to rid it of the tran metaphor Nimona is. She is the quintessential conservative power so bent on it staying that way that she will destroy everything in spite of any logic to why it's right. Goldenloin, as the champion of the institution, a head cop if you will, looks upon the chaos learning the director's intent to kill thousands and says "what are we doing here?" A lot of institutions (aah there's the naming for you) in our country are like this. I think to some like, there are people who entered religion or became a police officer because they wanted to do good. But the rhetoric in these spaces can skew that perspective exponentially. Some with better access out may find that point of "What are we doing her" The moment the logic of the system no longer makes sense. I would love to talk more a lot this an the comic institution at a later point.

Back to Nimona and the queer identity.

Nimona was searching for a group to accept her, changing her appearance to fit in. She thinks she has it with Gloreth until Gloreth is taught that Nimona's existence was monstrous and rejects her as well. The scene of the villagers attacking her is poinient as well; they endanger and threaten her with violence (which would likely have been more explicit if not for kids) and she first turns to something weaker to escape but they refuse and so she is forced to turn to something bigger ane vicious in order to live but it only sets up the narrative that there is a reason to fear her when she didnt attack first, she simply had to protect herself. Nimona in the present is ready for her death, the narrative so out of control that it breaks her.

Blackheart is able to bring her back from the brink by doing the important thing of truly apologizing, have humility for his mistrust and bigotry, and offer her support on equal terms. Nimona this time does not flee her friend that failed her but sacrifice herself for the hope of a better future beyond the walls.

The final part to mention; the walls. The walls are mad out as a big deal in this. No one leaves beyond them and the one small town of Gloreth fills to a big capitalist tech dystopia that markets dragons as both cute mascots and something to eradicate to as young as children. Society is a small shoebox not allowed to even see beyond the walls; see a new potential of this world. Simply put, the beyond is the beyond of heteronormative society. Even as society has become more accepting of LGBT identities, it has only liked to consume it in an easily interpreted manor. There are a lot of even just fringe identities that used to get lambasted for being weird simply for existing, trying to apply those same rules within their spaces as they've become socially acceptable. For every push forward we make, there is still presentation and identity that will get ostracized for being out of the box. We create these walls and only build them out further every so often rather than knocking them down. If there is anything to take from Nimona it's to embrace the beyond.

Morning edit; Hiii thank you for reading all of this. I kinda furiously typed this after watching the movie last night and there are certainly some flaws for it. Towards the end you can see a lot of typos because I was literally falling asleep and there are definitely some concepts I would've liked to flesh out better but kinda glossed over to focus on what the stories were saying about Nimona specifically. I think if anything, I'd want to reexamine Blackheart in both stories because I honestly forgot a lot of his actions in the comic, same with the institution because it took a while to even remember about the Director being a character from the comic. To be real, there's some really specific events on where Nimona was made that tend to hit me pretty hard so I rushed through the comic when I read it last year. I might try to take me time now because Nimona is so meaningful. I even want to talk about how it made sense Disney tried to shut it down (I'm certain there's a lot of business reasons but I don't think it was compatible with the Disney brand). For all the ways we have queer stories, I don't think we see a lot of trans stories yet. I'm hoping the series like Dead End Paranormal Park and Nimona are the start of a new era that focally represent that.

[daddysfangirls-dc]

UnTamed Ch.8

Damian Wayne x OC!Female

Prev | Next

Initially, they didn't know how to behave in a romantic relationship. At first, it was awkward, but then they fell back into the routine which was their friendship. Both were inexperienced in the field of romance and simply did what they were comfortable with. And right now, comfortable meant being outside, sitting on top of Damian's head as a baby duck and watching him paint. There was the sound of a side door opening. 

"is that a duck?" Damian turned to find Jason standing in the doorway.

"A duckling," Jason waited for him to elaborate. He didn't. "Alright, I'm going to the market with Alfred. Do you need anything?"

"No"

"we'll be gone for a couple of hours. You'll be home alone, you good?" 

"I'm not a toddler. I can be left unsupervised, Todd."

"Whatever you say." With that, Jason left with Alfred for their bi-weekly trip to the market, leaving Damian (And Asta) alone.  Damian continued to paint as his duckling crawled down his body and shifted human once her feet hit the floor. 

"What do you want to do next?" Asta asked as she leaned on Damian's back. He was almost done painting. 

"Is there anything in particular you wish to do?"

"How about a movie?" 

"I'll make some snacks. You go up and pick a movie." 

It was a second before the weight was lifted off his back, and he heard the familiar fluttering of feathers. She couldn't come in through the door because of security cameras, so she went in through his bedroom window as usual. Finished with his painting, he left it outside to dry and took his brushes inside to clean. Making a mixed bowl of fruit as a snack, he went upstairs to his room. 

"Have you picked something?"

"Yes, a rom-com."

"You and Grayson would get along well," he said as he settled in the bed next to her, handing her the bowl of fruit.

"The trailer looked funny," she pressed play.

Damian quickly lost interest in the movie. He took Asta's closed hand and slowly traced patterns all over her hand. "What are you doing?" she whispers 

"Touching you," he whispers in return as he brings her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles. She loved the feeling of his lips on her skin. She turned away to hide her blush and try to focus on the movie. That was something Asta had noticed since their shift from friendship to relationship. He had always been reserved before, but now he was constantly touching her, leaning on her, holding her hands, and lying in her lap.

It was warm and soft, much better than Dick's. Not that he'd say it out loud. Dick's touch was warm but suffocating and not always optional. Dick's affection was more for his own sake than others. Damian liked that he could say no to her touch and that she'd never force him. Nor would he force her.

Damian still made patterns on her palm when he felt her tense slightly. Looking up he finds the source a very intimate scene between a couple played on the tv. It didn't go beyond heavy petting and kissing, but still. Despite how close and touchy the couple were, Damian and  Astreae have yet to have their lips touched. Nor had they discussed it. It was just something that hadn't happened.

Looking at her, Damian saw how Asta did her best to avoid looking at him or the TV. Damian didn't feel tense or uncomfortable. Her bashfulness actually amused him. She felt his emotions and couldn't help but feel amused, even going as far as giggling. Then, she was infected by his nervousness. He was looking at her. He had that soft look on his face. She had seen it in the mask before, usually when in uniform. But he didn't have his mask, and she could see his eyes, and they were beautiful. She couldn't describe that look, that feeling he had, but she loved it.

And Then.

It was quick; she hadn't even closed her eyes before she felt his lips on hers and then gone.

"Oh," she didn't know what else to say, but she shouldn't have said that. She knew that when Damian shrank back. Asta leaned forward, following him. She was much slower than he was. Their eyes closed as their noses brushed against each other as they shared breaths, and then their lips touched softer and lingered longer, too. When she pulled away, she heard, "Oh," she giggled. 

"Another," he asked. She was happy to oblige again and again and again. Laughing and whispering affection in between kisses. Nothing more than long-winded pecks between those inexperienced, but it felt good nonetheless. Just being close. 

[heyclickadee]

My take (that no one asked for) on every single Star Wars show and non-saga movie:

The Clone Wars (movie): It’s…okay it’s rough. This wasn’t supposed to be a movie at all, putting three episodes of the show together and releasing it theatrically was part of the distribution deal with Cartoon Network, as far as I know, and it does show. It’s grown on me, though.

Clone Wars (The Tartakovsky Series): I think I’m probably in the minority here, but I actually don’t love this one. It’s fun, slick, and stylish, like everything Tartakovsky does is, and I don’t dislike it, but it just doesn’t do much for me. It’s cool. Maybe it’s a little too cool. Great art style, though.

The Clone Wars: Very high highs, very low lows. Though to be honest, I actually love a lot of the goofier episodes. They’re fun. It doesn’t have to be all drama all the time. Sometimes you can let Jar Jar be an agent of chaos. Sometimes you can have an episode about interest rates. I don’t have the nostalgia factor going with TCW the way a lot of people do—I didn’t watch it until I was in my twenties—so I do have to admit that it is tied with one other show as my least favorite of the animated shows, but that’s not a bad thing. I still love it.

Ewoks: I’ve only seen about six episodes. It’s veeerry 80’s. I think eight year old me would have gone insane for this show had I seen it. Adult me actually has a bit of a soft spot for it. I’ll watch the rest of it eventually. (Aaaand now I have the theme song stuck in my head. It’s. It’s definitely a theme song.)

Droids: I…haven’t seen it.

Resistance: I finally had a chance to get all the way through this show (I was eyeballs deep in “okay fine we’ll try this college thing AGAIN” when it was airing and just didn’t have time to check it out) and you know what? It’s actually pretty good. It’s definitely skewed even a little younger than Star Wars typically is, but it does what it does really well. Sort of feel like this one is slept on.

The Mandalorian: It’s a fantastic adventure of the week show. I actually don’t dislike the “plot” episodes, but mostly I’m just here to watch what shenanigans Din and his small green force son get into. Season three is weaker than the first two, but I don’t even really think that season is bad. There was some great stuff in it—just uneven and mixed in with some not so great stuff. Overall, good popcorn viewing, as far as I’m concerned.

Andor: Okay, yeah, Andor is fantastic. I do think some of its popularity is that it’s one of two (maybe three) Star Wars shows made for adults more than anyone else, so some people don’t quite have the same “why isn’t this making me feel like Star Wars did when I was a kid?” dissonance watching it, but it is also genuinely amazing. Probably the best thing Star Wars has ever done even if it’s not technically my favorite.

The Book of Boba Fett: Is it a mess? Yes. Do I still enjoy it? Yeah. My main problem with BoBF is that it’s got some serious structural issues. Even besides Din coming in and taking over two whole episodes, I think that the telling the story via flashbacks was a mistake, and that we should have followed Boba through the childhood bits and slowly caught up to him in the present. Maybe revealed it was all a flashback while he was in the bacta tank from there. And I…don’t love Robert Rodriguez’s directorial style all that much, never really have. That said, I do hope we eventually get more of this, though if we do I think it will be folded into something else. Still don’t love the live action pike design. (I actually have a conspiracy theory that BoBF was originally just a few episodes or even a season of The Mandalorian, and that it was made its own thing for marketing purposes.) I want more Boba, more Fennec, and more Sand People, if nothing else.

Solo: One, killing off Val Beckett was a huge mistake. It’s not story breaking or anything like that, but doing so when she’s one of very few black women in Star Wars and half of one of, like, two interracial couples in the entire franchise means that it hits in a way it wouldn’t if she was someone else. So, yeah, don’t like that. Two, the rest of this movie is a blast and audiences just hate fun. I don’t care that no one asked for this movie, it’s fun and campy and there’s a heist and I like it. Three, Enfys Nest has the sickest armor design in the whole franchise and I need more of her.

Kenobi: So…maybe unpopular opinion here, but…I really like Kenobi. Kenobi’s a delight. It’s not perfect, it’s got some problems, but I like that it’s about a guy who’s that depressed and alone slowly regaining his sense of hope, I like that we had something focus on Leia for a while (because Anakin and Padme had two kids and Leia always gets left second string), I like that you’ve got grifters like Haja and former imperials doing what little bits they can to help even though they can’t fight the whole empire. And I know that thoughts are mixed on this, but I actually thought it made a couple bits of A New Hope make more sense where Leia is concerned; kid me could never figure out how she knew who Ben Kenobi was when that was the name he only went by in exile on Tattooine (“Ben Kenobi? Where is he!?”), and it kind of made the switch from the very formal request for aid on behalf of her father to the more personal, “Help me, Obi Wan Kenobi,” a little more poignant, for me, anyway. Reva is an amazing character, she’s a perfect parallel and eventually perfect foil for Anakin, she’s a mess and a he’s in pain and I just. I love her. I have mixed feelings on the live action Grand Inquisitor’s performance (and mixed feelings on the makeup—on the one hand it could be better and on the other hand the other main live action pau’an we’ve got—the actor’s head was just shaped like that). Nevertheless, this show for me was mostly about the big emotional beats, and it hit all of those really well.

The Bad Batch: This is a magnificent show and I adore it apart from That One Thing and the fact that everything was left completely open, even going into the epilogue, apart from Omega’s coming of age and the Hunter’s and Omega’s relationship’s arc. That was resolved very well. I am mildly insane about this show. I love it. Also, it vexes me. Tied with two other shows as my favorite Star Wars show in spite of all that. Amazing soundtrack. Sidebar: If it turns out I’m right and That One Thing is an extended fake out and we’re not quite done with these characters, I’m sorry, but I’m going to be the most insufferable person alive.

The Acolyte: Everyone is very pretty and just a little stupid. Mae is very fun. The good scenes are very, very good. The writing is pretty uneven; judging from interviews I have a completely different view of writing than Leslye Headland and had a hard time picking up why a lot of the characters did anything, but when it hit, it hit. It’s…very CW drama, which isn’t a bad thing—just not always my thing. That said, Sol is a fascinating concept for a character and Lee Jung-jae did an incredible job with what he was given. Same with Qimir and Manny Jacinto. It’s honestly not my favorite Star Wars show, but I’m still disappointed that it looks like it’s not moving forward. The leftover story might end up being folded into the high republic book series, but I still hope we get some kind of on-screen continuation. I think the public needs more of Darth Babe the Jacked.

Rogue One: It’s great. Yes, the entire main cast dies, but the central message was still about hope. Vader gets to pun. I remain somewhat dismayed that the only thing a portion of the audience took away from it was that the Vader hallway scene was cool. He’s a horror movie monster there. Still a great movie. (Also, Saw, why do you have that??)

Young Jedi Adventures: This skews very young; most Star Wars is for kids in the first place apart from Andor, the Acolyte, and mmaaaaaybe the Tales of anthology (the other live action shows are, in my opinion, solidly whole family), but this really is made for very young children. That said, I have watched it, and it’s a very well done show for very young kids. Also I would die and kill for Nubs.

The “Tales Of” anthology series: Yes, I am counting this as one, because even though there’s a shift in focus from the Jedi to the empire between seasons, it all follows the exact same format and structure. I’d argue this series is the one that’s primarily for the adults who either grew up watching Star Wars animation or got into it as adults. It’s good, lots of atmosphere, the episodes do range in quality but I generally like them, and it’s nice they get to play around with different techniques, like making miniatures and incorporating them into the animation. The Dooku and Barriss episodes are probably my favorites.

Ahsoka: I know the fandom is divided on this, like they are on most things, but I love this one, okay? It’s not perfect, but I have a good time watching it. It just happens to be this perfect blend of campy, fun, dramatic, and mystical that really feels like Star Wars for me. I like it when Star Wars gets weird, has silly little guys, and doesn’t take itself too seriously. Lucky for me that this series has extragalactic travel via whale, Ahsoka being dragged to Force Therapy by Anakin, and Ezra hanging out with the space fraggles. That, and I love some of the concepts. I like the idea that force sensitivity isn’t the be all end all, that connecting to the force is something you can learn with practice even if you weren’t blessed with the genetic lottery. Peridea and the space it occupies in folklore is neat. And the music is wonderful. It is a little uneven, it’s not Andor or anything quite that amazing, but I’m eager for more.

Visions: This anthology is fantastic and you’re missing out if you haven’t seen it. I don’t love every entry, but even the weaker ones are worth seeing once, and the stronger ones are worth seeing a whole lot more than that. It’s a great blend of styles and takes from people normally not involved in creating Star Wars. This is in a three way tie for my favorite Star Wars show.

Rebels: Again, it’s not perfect, because no show is, but I also think it’s the strongest standalone show Star Wars has besides Andor. Yes, there are weaker episodes, but on the whole it’s remarkably consistent, and the second half of season four might be some of my favorite Star Wars outside of parts of the original trilogy. Also, it has some stunning backgrounds, and while the art style doesn’t always work for every character, the character animation ends up really hitting its stride towards the end of the second season, and just gets better from there. And, as always, the music is fantastic. Rebels rounds out that three way tie for my favorite Star Wars show along with TBB and Visions.

[love-kurdt]

Swooping, Sloping, Cursive Letters: 34

word count: 408

PLEASE READ THIS IS ME TRYING FIRST, AS THIS STORY RELIES HEAVILY UPON THE CONTEXT OF TIMT

August 5, 1990

Dear Will,

You probably wouldn’t believe it if I told you (I, of all people, should know you have quite a bit of trouble believing what I tell you), but I made a friend. I met him last week in the library while I was browsing the fantasy section for writing inspiration.

His name is Wyatt Bowman, and I think he’s kind of becoming my best friend. My best friend here, at least. He’s so cool. He has bold, dyed red hair, hazel eyes that vaguely remind me of yours, and a New Jersey accent. Not to mention, he has a killer taste in music— the day we met, he was wearing an Iron Maiden tee shirt. Okay, I’m gonna stop rambling, it kind of sounds like I’m trying to market Wyatt to you in hopes that you’d like him; that you’d approve.

I should also probably tell you that Wyatt and I have a friends with benefits situation going on, but it’s really not that serious. Whenever we hang out (at my place, since I live alone and he has a roommate), we usually just watch movies or play video games and smoke weed. And yes, I still smoke it occasionally, as long as I’m not the one who’s buying it or mixing too much of it with alcohol. We don’t drink together— well, I still do, but Wyatt’s been sober for a year because he got addicted to the stuff. He’s fine being around me, though. I drink a lot, but I’m fine. I can stop anytime I want. I just like feeling out of control sometimes; it’s seemingly the only thing in my life that I can control.

Anyway, once we’re properly buzzed, we get to making out pretty quickly. Then, someone moves a certain way, and suddenly we’re naked in my bed and coming down from the most insane orgasm in the history of the universe. Half an hour later, we could be chatting about school like nothing even happened. It’s kind of great, actually. I get to have mind blowing sex regularly, but without the commitment or the looming threat of emotionally cheating on Wall Will™, my imaginary not-even-ex-ex-boyfriend who hasn’t spoken to me in almost a year!! What a fucking bargain!

Speaking of bargaining, I miss you. If there’s anything I could possibly do to save us, please send me a sign. Letters or paintings work, too.

Love,

Mike

-

previous letter | next letter

homepage

[somecallmejohn]

I highly doubt that Starboy's inclusion to the story and romance with Asha "would have saved" the movie because the people who claim that just genuinely do not care about Wish at all until they saw the concept art and immediately went to war for Disney for the crime of robbing them of their glowstick, even though said robbing never happened considering the amount of fanwork of said glowstick

They care more about the idea rather than the likelihood of how bad or good it's executed

A human star is actually a neat idea, however i do understand why Disney themselves scrapped it because if they did included the star shapeshifter idea, people will just use it as an excuse to accuse Wish of copying Nimona, Stardust and themselves with Genie and Sisu, as if the "homeages" are nonexistent

I don't think anyone would accuse Disney of copying Nimona just cuz the Starboy would be a shapeshifter too. Generally, a shapeshifter isn't that groundbreaking of an idea nowadays, if I'm being honest. Honestly, I think they scrapped human Star just cuz they scrapped the romance in the first place and because he wasn't as marketable as the design of Star they ended up going with.

But yeah, I agree. In my opinion, people are hyping the whole starboy x Asha thing a little too much as if its removal is ultimately what led to the movie to be the mess that it is. They keep thinking of what could have been while simultaneously ignoring that the movie could still have all the issues it has now just with romance sprinkled in it.

But if I'm being honest, what doomed Wish in the first place wasn't the lack of romance, but it was Disney's inability to take risks. Like I love Wish, it's genuinely my second favorite Disney movie(third, if you don't count Frozen 1 and 2 as one thing like I do), but one of the movie's biggest sins along with Valentino is that it played things too safe it didn't take any risks with the story or the characters or the animation or idk what.

Even with the animation style as much as I personally love it, I can tell that the producers were like "Spiderverse and Puss in Boots are really popular for their animation style so let's try a different style for this movie but not too different as it should still be recognizable" and then just slapped a watercolor texture on the typical 3D Disney style we've been used to the last decade and a half.

Huge part of why non-Disney movies like Spider-Verse, Nimona and Puss in Boots: the last wish are so beloved is because there were risks taken when making those movies, whereas Disney has been playing it safe for the last decade and you can feel that certain choices were made to make the films more marketable.

And I don't want to sound like "*scoff* Old Disney is SOOOO much better" because I genuinely can't stand those people and most of the time they bring up the worst reasons as to why old Disney is better, but like "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" , a huge mixed bag of a movie that has misfires such as using the G slur multiple times, a not so good representation of Romani people, the gargoyles etc., is still such a beloved movie to this day because of how risky it feels compared to newer Disney movies. Not only does it have a score and a soundtrack like no other movie ever, but it's also one of if not the darkest animated movie Disney has ever created and there's plenty of stuff that wouldn't have been in the movie had it been made today.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hey Raven, are you going to watch the upcoming new Disney movie "Wish"?

I've seen mixed reviews, but i'm lowkey excited since we get to see a new Disney villain, especially since Disney got really lame villains after all the old classic movies!

Have you seen the trailer for the movie? What are your thoughts so far?

I saw Wish with a friend recently! I'll give my thoughts on the trailers here (in case you don't want spoilers for the film itself) and put my full thoughts beneath the cut (if you're okay with spoilers).

Looks-wise, I think Disney was definitely trying to go for something more stylistic and painting-esque for this?? And while I commend the effort, it definitely doesn't look as interesting as Puss in Boots 2: The Last Wish. The humor also definitely isn't for me, it feels very "quirky" and "so relatable" (Asha reminds me of Mirabel in that sense), and other times too juvenile (like the goat butt joke). I do like the idea of the villain passing as a good guy in-universe and actually being vain and selfish, especially since the marketing is making it clear who the bad guy is rather than making it a "twist" villain scenario. Not sure if I like Magnifico himself though??? All the ads with him in it feel like Disney is trying too hard to make people thirst for him. From just the trailers, Magnifico does seem interesting and like more of a return to the traditional "villain" rather than the protagonist having to deal with an existential dread or concept.

***Spoilers for Wish beneath the cut!***

Right off the bat, my first impression is the narrative is SO ham-fisted. Within the first 5 minutes alone we're establishing so much information and in such a clunky, unnatural way. Like... Asha says hi to her friends but then they robotically have a dialogue where they overtly call each other "friends" just so it's clear to the audience (when in reality no one talks like that). It's telling instead of showing, and this happens sooo many times early in the film.

Could not for the life of me remember the friends or their names. There were just too many of them when 1 or 2 would have been just fine to move the plot along and to help Asha. (Yes, I know they're a reference to the 7 Dwarves but it's STILL not necessary to have so many just for a reference.)

Bruh, the makeup in this movie is on point. Every time there was a close up of a character, I was staring at their eye makeup (especially Asha and the queen's).

Asha as a protagonist was... fine? She feels very close to Mirabel and at times Rapunzel in her character. I didn't dislike her by any means, but she didn't reinvent what it means to be a Disney protag. Her motivations also come off as… really “out of nowhere”. We’re told she “cares too much”, but she initially only wants to save the wishes of her mom and grandpa; she randomly decides she has to free ALL wishes midmovie and that was jarring. There could have been a smoother transition. Instead, it was abrupt and Asha didn’t change in any meaningful way. Even her “I want” song was vague (what exactly is “to have something more for us than this”?) and didn’t connect well with her character.

I do really like her design though! Her freckles, earrings, and how her hair moves are my favorite details.

Valentino was not as annoying as I thought he would be. Still didn't care for his sass and brand of humor, but at least he helped out a few times.

I called it, the film is trying so hard to make Magnifico "hot" 🤡 I don't get it but okay, Mouse. I see your effort.

Loved his fit!! Very cool cloak and diamond/star motifs everywhere! His lab and study was also fun to look at.

I quite liked the moments when the queen talked to her husband and tried to smooth things over with him. “I can fix him energy”— Their relationship seemed very genuine at the start of the movie.

NOT THE WISH NEPOTISM...

If they were going for “sympathetic” with Magnifico, it didn’t work. He gave this backstory about how he was traumatized before + left as the only survivor of a great tragedy and so now he wants to use his magic to prevent that from happening to anyone else. Thing is, we only ever know about this via his word and staring at a half-burnt tapestry. We never see the event on screen, nor what was left of the tapestry. I was expecting a twist where it’s revealed that he lied all this time about his backstory and rewrote history so he could more easily manipulate the people of the kingdom he founded and live out the fantasy of being worshipped as a “good guy”. That was such a missed opportunity!!

Something else I was thinking of (this was during “This is the Thanks I get” was??? Maybe Magnifico started off genuinely good but became worn down over time as people’s wishes grew more selfish and they became ungrateful for what they had?? Then he could have become bitter and disillusioned by the behavior of his people.

Another idea is maybe Magnifico was “villainous” only in Asha’s eyes, since they don’t agree on how to best handle granting wishes. This would be more of a clash of ideologies rather than the traditional Obvious Evil vs Obvious Good that Disney is so known for, but hey, it could be a neat evolution of their storytelling from classic fairy tale roots.

This is to say that there were so many more interesting directions they could have gone with Magnifico’s motives, character, and portrayal 😭 but the second half of the movie never commits to any of these, they just blame his complete insanity and turn to the dark side on Forbidden Magic which is such a cop-out.

The trailers gave away the twist that Magnifico was the villain. It wasn’t revealed until like the second song into the movie. Would’ve worked better as an on-the-spot reveal rather than part of the marketing, in my opinion.

When they showed the wishes, the TWST fan in my was shouting, "OMG IT'S WISH UPON A STAR, THE LIMITED TIME STORY EVENT FROM THE HIT DISNEY MOBILE GACHA GAME TWISTED WONDERLAND!!!"

As Wish is Disney's anniversary film for 100 years, there were tooons of easter eggs scattered throughout. (I had fun looking for them!) Some were visual (I saw Aurora's dress, Snow White’s well, Peter's Pan's costume, Ursula's green smokey hands, Asha's robes resembling those of the Fairy Godmother, etc.) or extended imagery/scenes (Asha recreates Mulan's dinner and “Reflection" scenes), others were more overt lines of dialogue (Magnifico says the "Mirror, Mirror" lines along with others, a deer named “Bambi”, Valentino mentions an animal metropolis in reference to Zootopia, etc.).

In theory, the wish magic sounds cool but has so much that isn't explained??? And yeah, it's magic so it technically doesn't have to be. However, there are things not explained even when it is important to the plot. For example, Magnifico crushes some wishes and seems to absorb their power for himself (including the wish of Asha's MOM, so you'd think this would be important)? The consequence of this is that the wish's owners... become sad??? Okay, what are the long-term effects??? Why isn’t this fully explored?? But then later in the film we see the same people whose wishes were crushed... regenerate their wish??? So what, he has to keep reaping them??? And why are the wishes only taken at 18 years old? What if a wish changes? Ironically, the townspeople of Rosas have a scene where they question the technicalities of this wish magic. Magnifico essentially tells them to shut up, and it kinda felt like Disney was telling us to not question their lore www

It was weird that they never fully explored the ramifications of going without your wish. You’d think they’d show us people without ambition or hope (which would incentivize Asha to return their wishes), but everyone seems blissfully happy without their wishes?? The only exception is Asha’s friend that betrays her (cannot for the life of me remember his name), and that’s namely because his asshole friends keep ragging on him for it.

I thought the movie was going to go in a “you can make your own wish come true!!” direction but NOPE, turns out it’s just magic. Felt like Disney unintentionally wrote a whole movie about "wishes not coming true unless some big powerful entity allows it to come true” (Asha literally becomes the fairy godmother of Rosas at the end, making her ultimately no different than Magnifico)… ie a metaphor for how Disney owns so many properties it practically owns our childhoods www

"The power of friendship saves the day" ending 🤣 It was very Paper Mario ending-esque...

A song saving the day though?? It’s giving the Illumination Lorax film…

I was right about the humor. Too "quirky" and/or juvenile for me.

Animation was alright? Nothing awful about it, it just didn't feel as detailed or as experimental as other films with a similar style.

Songs were mid, which checks out with the recent Disney music excluding We Don't Talk About Bruno--

Some of the lyrics however were awful. “I let you live here for free and I don’t even charge you rent” is redundant. “So I throw caution to every warning sign” means you’ll show more caution than usual, not that you’ll forego caution. The correct expression is “throw caution to the wind”. Etc, etc, etc.

There was a cute after credits scene where they reveal that Asha's 100 year old grandpa (same age as Disney omg) wrote the "When You Wish Upon a Star" theme, which was sweet since his wish was "wanting to make a mark".

THE BEST PART OF THE MOVIE WAS STAR!! It was very cute (partly because it couldn't talk and just jingled and giggled, I was dreading another annoying mascot animal voice) and reminds me of my own pet… The way Star infused everything with glitter and formed unique shapes with the red twine was so fun 😭 I'M A STAR STAN, IT WAS ADORABLE AND KINDA BRATTY AND I'M LIVING FOR IT

Decent ideas, "meh" execution. Enchanted and Shrek did it better in terms of self-aware, fairy tale defying stories. It felt as though the movie was trying to deliver a profound message but got lost in the sauce of making as making Disney references possible and didn't fully commit to actually saying something meaningful. As a result, the film feels somewhat… hollow.

That one friend betraying Asha was the biggest surprise in the film but I still saw it coming 😂 I do get where he’s coming from though (being worried that his wish won’t ever come true) but it also felt like his conflict wasn’t resolved??? It might have gone better if the movie actually fully tried to push the “you can make your own wish come true” message (to reinvigorate the traitor to make his dreams a reality on his own) but they don’t 💦

Wish didn’t end up being “the wishing star’s origin story” because not once did anyone question where Star came from or why it was different from other stars (or what the significance of Magnifico blotting out the other stars was).

I think the people that would enjoy this movie are the people that are already highly invested in Disney and the nostalgia of it.

... Anyway, stan Star 🤩 (and the talking mushrooms 🍄)

[doggernaut]

Thank you to @parvuls for the BINGO card and motivation to do this. I love fic, and I love sharing fic recs (and I love hunting down fics for people!), especially those that fly under the radar. I think there's a good mix of "classics" and what I hope will become new favorites for people in here.

(I'm going for the blackout here, folks, but will post one line at a time because I just got back from one trip and am trying to plan another (not to mention catch up on everything I put off during the week I was away), and putting these rec lists together is time consuming. )

genfic (no ships) • Atwater Market by WrathoftheStag (@wrathofthestag)

I love this little fic about Bitty and Bob bonding as they shop for dinner. There's something really satisfying about reading about positive relationships between a character and their partner's family members, and I love that Bitty and Bad Bob have their own "thing" they're able to connect over that has nothing to do with Jack. @wrathofthestag also writes so evocatively about cities and food; when I can’t travel, her fics scratch that itch.

crossover • And the Day Winding Like Dreams by HugeAlienPie (@hugealienpie)

This is less a crossover than it is a fic inspired by Inception, though characters from that movie are mentioned in passing. What this is is a fic that takes Inception’s world building and skillfully transfers it to a post-canon SMH fic that’s also a heist AU and an incredibly romantic getting together story. Read it even if you aren’t familiar with Inception; I did and I loved it, and when I finally saw the movie it was that much easier to follow because I’d read this fic.

hurts so good • This Unsheltered Place  by westernredcedar (@thewesternredcedar)

Buckle up and brace yourself because this is it, the ultimate angst fic. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read this fic and still have to skim the first few chapters because they’re so painful. But, painful in w way that poking at a bruise is kind of satisfying. Despite the pain, this is one of my top five fics of all time. Yes, there is a breakup, but the coming back together is so satisfying and, because of the way it happens, feels so earned. This is also a wonderful Jack Zimmermann character study that delves into his anxieties and insecurities (a thing that @thewesternredcedar is so so good at in every fic). His decisions in this fic aren’t always the best decisions but they always make sense, and that’s largely because the author is so skillful at making the reader to see Bitty through Jack’s eyes. (Mind the tags, because I mean it when I say this one can be rough.)

still a WIP • It's Only a Change of Time  by Sophia_Prester (@missweber)

I don't want to say too much about this time loop fic but that's because 23 (out of a projected 25) chapters in, I still can't begin to guess how it's going to end. It's a time loop and a mystery and there's a bit of hockey history and Jack Zimmermann/Zimmermann family backstory thrown in as well. Johnson is there. Through it all, it's Jack's love for Bitty and the life he wants to build with him that drives him to do what he does. Over and over again. This fic is so well thought out and executed. As soon as it finishes I plan to read it all over again from the beginning because I know I'll see things I missed the first time around.

you read it instead of sleeping • Heart of Ice by flowerfan (@flowerfan2)

This is a 55K fic that I read in one night. I couldn’t put it down. Without giving too much away, it’s a mystery of sorts that begins with Jack disappearing. I read this straight through because I couldn’t sleep without knowing why Jack left. The chapters depicting the months Bitty spends alone, grieving the end of his relationship and forging ahead with his post-college life, felt as long to me as they must have to him. As the story progresses the reason for Jack’s disappearance, and the way he and Bitty navigate their new normal upon his return, is slowly revealed. This fic is so well-crafted and though an AU, it has all of the elements of a classic Zimbits fic: their love for one another despite the apparent obstacles, and Bitty’s kindness and belief in Jack, are its foundation. 

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Things are Very Mixed

May 2023 Wk 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Step By Step (Thai Tues WeTV & Gaga) ep 3 of 10 (MDL still says 12, but Gaga still says 10) - The subs are janky on YT, so you might want to watch this on Gaga. This is such a good show, it just feels so much more authentic to an office environment and first job then anything else I’ve seen in BL. Now that might be because it has western source material, or it might be because it is actually kind of old-fashioned (it’s been years since I worked as an office grunt). While the authenticity may be a little triggering for some, I love how much tension it adds to the leads’ dynamic and the quality of the narrative. I also really love the brothers’ relationship, now that we got to see them on screen together for a bit. Walk of shame was great! Oh look, character development, how novel. This is what Boss & Babe should have been. Not sold on the sides tho it’s nice to see a faen fatal as the main character in a dynamic for a change. 

La Pluie (Sat iQIYI) ep 2 of 10 - This one is really grabbing me by the throat. I love the starter concepts, what a fantastic twist on a meet cute not to mention soulmates. I hope we spend more time with the vet and his coworkers, they seem awesome. And another surprise, the guy we think is being set up to be the brother’s love interest is now clearly interested in the wrong brother. I love the trope subversions going on with this show! 

Our Skyy 2 (The Eclipse) eps 5-6 - FirstKhao are just ridiculously cute as a couple. Honestly? Aye just seems like he would be a lot of work as a lover. I’m not as wild about the premise of this installment, with the film clips and stuff (as I was of NlMG’s installment). And then, the singing. Oh well, you can’t have everything. I gotta say, First is a great crier, although I don’t think this story warranted his tears. In the end? My feelings on this installment were mixed, the movie storyline didn’t grab me and the birthday storyline seems a touch mean spirited, but I do think it adds substantially to the original Eclipse rather than feeling superfluous or slapdash like many of the other Our Skyys. So I’m going to go with 8/10 

Future (Thai Sun YouTube & Gaga) ep 6fin - More of the same (which I like) but I’m glad it ended. Didn’t need to get dragged out. Such drama over nothing. In the end? This is just a soft sweet cotton candy fluff piece about a younger boy who pursues an older boy and then manufactures silly gay drama. Nothing wrong with that. But I don’t think this style of BL really appeals to a very large market share. Will I rewatch it? Sure. Will anyone else? Nope. 7/10 RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS.    

Pastsenger (Thai Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 12 eps - And now the amnesia trope. I’m not a fan. This is such a pulp. At least it ends next week? Groan, no 3 more eps.  

A Boss and a Babe (Fri YouTube) ep 10 of 12 - one thing I realize I like about this main couple’s dynamic is that the seme/uke seems earned, where it didn’t in Echante. I don’t have much else to say except it’s crazy when a narrative betrays its characters like this and why to poor ForceBook keep having to deal with it? 

The Promise (Thai Weds YT & WeTV) ep 7 of 10 - Honestly, who wears an all white outfit to play around with coffee beans in the countryside? I LOVE the faen fatal, he’s so good, courageous, honest, and morally sound. He even gives his rival fair warning. Nan should totally go out with him. I made awwww noises over the faen fatal! I NEVER do that. I guess Phu was right all along? Nan won’t date a friend. Ultimate friend zone. Well shit. This show. Ouch. 

House of Stars (Thai Mon iQIYI) ep 1 of ?? - There seems a slight horror element which I do not like and it’s also confusingly like Melrose Place or something. Everyone is sleeping with, or wants to be sleeping with everyone else. It’s kinda hilarious to watch something where all the actors are supposed to be good actors but it’s a pulp so they just really aren’t. So far my main issue is I can’t keep them all straight in my head (pun intended). 

Tin Tam Jai (Tues Gaga) ep 10fin - There is very little I enjoyed about this show. The entirely forgotten side dishes gave us 5 min of excellent high heat and then vanished, but otherwise this show sucked in the wrong way. It’s forgettable and I intend to do just that. 5/10  

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 5 of 10 - The way these two are very quietly yet thoroughly falling in love with each other is executed with such grace and subtlety that only Japan could have handed this out. It’s not even “falling” it’s more like sliding gradually into love. 

Love Mate (Korea Thurs Viki) eps 1-2 of 8 - Launched very much openly gay so that’s fun. Also very much bubble too, so no one around them cares. So: Seo is a player jaded older uke (fun character type we don’t see often) and his seme is a romantic if arrogant weirdo. Can you see my hands clapping? Combative trope activation! Absurdity. How fun. Also workplace harassment but hayho that’s BL for ya. (Also a nonBL Kdrama specialty.) ALSO whole office in on seme-stalker’s side? All in all, it’s odd and questionable, but I’m into it. Why am I like this? 

Happy Merry Ending (Korea Thurs Gaga) eps 3-4 of 8 - OK I’m not super into the main couple but I love all of the surrounding characters. The overly protective best friend with a crush is giving bad advice but it’s understandable and he’s super hot so I forgive him. And the idol character is a wonderful addition, he is my baby. Also, evil ex is v evil. 

Vian the series (Vietnam YT ) - I thought this was gonna be Tiktok only but apparently it’s showing up on YT too. It’s cute! My cat boyfriend (which is more common that it should be) and this seems to be Vietnam’s installment (we got Thailand’s last year). The boy playing the cat is the prettiest human being on the planet. Fight me. No fight him, get scratched. Serious tho. Holy hairballs. Look I don’t really like vertical content but I am watching this for him. Meow, indeed. 

The Day I Loved You (Vietnam YouTube) eps 2-3 of ? - BL Express’s first impressions mirror mine. Niks is so flipping cute. Rich kid is so into him, so is bestie. So much gay macho posturing. So much bi fear and het shame. But also it’s killer to get a femme main characters who isn’t being mocked. Dancing trope continues (better than singing together). It is kinda Heartstopper goes Pinoy BL. Honestly, I prefer kids a little drawings to terrible sound effects. This is better than it or we have any right to expect. 

Naked Dinner AKA Zenra Meshi (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 4 of 12 - There is a lot I like about this drama, except the weird central conceit of the naked dining. But the romance part is cute, if a tad simplistic. 

My Story (Pinoy Sat YouTube) ep 4 of 10 - chukchuk went missing and so did my interest in this show. I’m DNFing this one. 

Dancing together, the baby sub-trope of 2023. (The Day I Love You) 

It’s Airing But ...

Love Syndrome (Thai Sat WeTV) stopped at ep 2 of 12 - I’m just not into any aspect of it (except Lee Long Shi) - saving to binge if the end is solid.

Venus in the Sky (Sat YouTube) pilot/tester?) 0 of 10 - not entirely sure what’s up with this one distribution-wise, but the pilot was classic university-set pulp. I hope it happens because the leads are cute with good chemsitry and I thought it was fun. However, this pilot holds together as its own little short too.

Stormy Honeymoon (Vietnam) - meh

In Case You Missed It

Actors Bas Suradej (2 Moons etc...) and Copter Panuwat (so much BL) have left Starhunter. So Copter and Kimmon will part ways as an on-screen pair (RIP KimCop). Their upcoming show Boy Never Smiles will still air, but will likely be their last together. (source) 

Restart After Come Back Home (highly recommended), Athlete, Capture Lover, Tkumi-kun, His the movie (recommended) and also a bunch of the dark stuff like Forbidden Love and Shortest Distance are all leaving Gagaoolala soon. So watch ‘em while you can. A few are also on Viki, but many will be difficult to get hold of without Gaga. 

I finally finished the second season of The Reason Why He Fell in Love with Me (Japan Gaga) and gave it a 4/10. I just don’t like or recommend any of the installments of this franchise, but if I had to pick, it’s season one. 

Make a Wish finished at 6 eps. Stars Fluke Natouch (OhmFluke UWMA etc...) & Judo (The Miracle Of Teddy Bear) in medical-fantasy about a doctor who sees ghosts and a deity who resides in a Bodhi tree that earns merits whenever he fulfills a wish. Based on a y-novel by Sammon (Manner of Death, Triage). I will watch it if I get hold of it, but for now... who knows how it went? 

Here’s a really interesting podcast ep from 99% Invisible on captions and captioning.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Coming in May 2023:

5/18 - Starstruck (Korea ????) - A boy has had a crush on his childhood friend for a long time. Stars Zuho (Kpop SF9 - noted good egg) opposite rookie actor Kim In Sung (the one with the crush).

5/27 The Luminous Solution (Thai ????) 10 eps - Thana is having trouble at work and in his relationship. He can't seem to catch a break. So he makes a wish to change everything. The wish has a price.

5/27 Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari no Hajimari no Asa (Japan) - NO ONE ASKED FOR THIS (but that has never stopped Japan before) and no, I have no idea where to get it, why would I ?????  (Say it with me everyone: Oh Japan, must you?)

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

Defining Gut Wrenching from The Promise

Honestly you gotta be so careful who you case as the faen fatal, sometimes he steals everyone’s hearts. I caught a BAD case of second lead syndrome. 

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Future reviewing itself for us. 

Tiny king of the GMMTV cameo. (Our Skyy et al)

Frankly if this weren’t such a bad story, Cher might be one of my favorite BL characters. (Boss & Babe) 

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? BTOB's - Wind & Wish (I don’t consider myself Melody but I make no case for that statement)

[wowbright]

I'm about halfway through La La Land. Really wanted to like it. I mean, it's a musical. I like musicals. But I didn't know much about it other than that.

Review/liveblog below the cut.

Started suspecting in the opening number that I might not like it, since the opening hinted that it would be an ode to the LA film scene. (Ooh, LA film people talking about how great LA film is--I'm not an actor, I'm not a filmmaker, hopefully this movie will have something more interesting to hook me in.)

Oh, good! It's also going to be about jazz!

Huh. Neither Emma Stone nor Ryan Gosling are very good singers. They are okay at dancing. Now, I hear that these days it's important that anybody in a musical be an actor first and the other things second. But if music and dancing are part of the storytelling, it's important that they be as strong as the acting IMO.

Okay. Now we're back to jazz. He's going to explain to her why jazz is so awesome. He takes her to a club.. Except ... Hmmm. This is uncomfortable. Why are we seeing jazz exclusively through the eyes of this white dude? We see black musicians, but they are just in the background. He plays at a club. Again, black people are furnishings. John Legend gets a line. Then he gets some more lines.

Around now this review of the first half of the movie turns into a live blog of the second half of the movie.

Yay John Legend sings. Alas it's on a stage and not part of the storytelling, but background to the storytelling. Idk I can't really watch this scene too closely because of the strobing lights.

(Aside: Where has she been getting the money to pay for the dresses, the high heels, and now the one woman show? There's a limit to how much you can put on a credit card, isn't there?)

The dialogue in this movie often feels stilted. Is this a stylistic choice?

Now they're arguing. He doesn't like the music he's been playing with John Legend, which is interesting, because it seems like he was enjoying it and she was the one who wasn't enjoying it. Is any of this real or they just like super enmeshed and codependent?

Eh I've completely divested myself emotionally from this movie. I'm going to start fast forwarding to see what happens. It's not like there's musical numbers anyway.

Photo shoot. More strobing lights.

Why do we see him perform, but we don't see her perform?

Oh look they're fighting again. Do I give a fuck? No.

I don't get it. Is it supposed to be a fun musical or A Star is Born?

We have gone half an hour without a genuine musical number.

Emma Stone is singing. This is a musical again! Too bad this song, like the others, is just so-so. (Idk maybe it was Kristin Chenoweth they would sound amazing?) I feel like this song is supposed to be the big emotional payoff for a strong storyline, but unfortunately the storyline hasn't been that strong. (I mean to be fair I have fast forwarded through like the last 20 minutes but that was because the story was already meandering and sucking.)

They break up. Unfortunately, I never bought their love story beyond the initial crush, so I don't care. (I'm not saying I don't believe that these people *could* love each other deeply. I'm saying that the story skipped over the part after the first kiss where they got to truly know each other and fall in love, so I'm not convinced of it.)

What the fuck? in the alternative "what if their lives have been perfect" montage, Ryan Gosling just waves off Keith like he's some kind of subordinate? Like, arguably one of the most talented musicians we have seen in this whole movie? Gross.

Then in the part that is an explicit visual ode to the golden age of movie musicals, when they are on that colorful soundstage resembling a cartoonish LA, I actually lose track of where Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling are mixed in with all the other dancers. That should not be possible if the correct cinematographic choices were made.

Also I think it should be illegal to market movies as romances when the characters don't end up together in the end.

So yeah I guess this movie got all the accolades because the people who give the accolades and awards see themselves in this story.

But seriously what the fuck now that I've seen this movie I feel like I've been lied to for the past six years.