#i have genuinely been through this multiple times
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aewon · 1 day ago
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all night, in love — YJW
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pairing- jungwon x fmr genre: fluff, e2l, fake dating ⚠️: kissing, cursing, slight slight very tiny angst (practically nonexistent) wc: 3k
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You hate Yang Jungwon, and he hates you too.
The reason? You ACCIDENTALLY tripped him in front of his crush in 9th grade. You never knew someone could hold such a grudge for something that wasn’t on purpose.
Ever since that day, Jungwon has made it his life mission to make you miserable.
He doesn’t do anything physical, he just makes annoying, mean jabs at you whenever he can, which you don’t hesitate to fire back.
What you never expected was for him to come up to you, asking for a favor.
“A favor? Why would I ever want to help you?” You scoff at his audacity, turning away from him on the bench you’re currently occupying.
He doesn’t go away, instead sitting next to you on the other side, facing you.
“Please, I’ll do anything!” When you look at him, he’s pouting, something that’s never been directed toward you.
He almost looks…cute?
“Anything?” You ask, not concealing the smirk gracing your face.
“… As long as it’s nothing super crazy, yes.”
You ponder for a moment, what could you possibly need from Yang Jungwon.
“I’ll help you, but I’m not telling you what you’re doing until after we’re done! So what exactly is it that you need?”
Jungwon suddenly looks away from you, biting his lip as if he’s afraid to say it.
“Well? We don’t have all day.”
He looks down at the ground, twiddling his thumbs before finally speaking, “I need you to date me.”
You almost spit out the sip of coffee you just took.
“What?”
“Look, you know Yoona, right?”
You nod, having met the girl before in science class.
“I have a huge crush on her but she never notices any of my attempts to talk to her or engage so I figured if I’m dating someone, that’ll make her notice. Everyone knows we don’t like each other so it’ll make a huge spectacle.”
Your eyebrows furrow at his rhetoric.
“Everyone knows we don’t like each other, so they’ll definitely believe we just started dating? That makes no sense, Jungwon. Come on, you’re smarter than that.”
“We can say it was all a ruse! We just didn’t want people knowing how much we like each other so we pretended to have a fued instead.”
“Still doesn’t make sense. Our friends and peers aren’t stupid, they’ll see right through us.”
“Not if we’re convincing! We’re talking right now, right? Not arguing. We’ll just tell everyone we decided to come clean. Please do this for me, you know I’d never bother you with something like this otherwise.”
That is true, and although you can’t ever imagine yourself liking someone like Jungwon, it’s fake.
“Fine, I’ll do it.”
Jungwon, for the first time, gives you a genuine smile. One that’s not devolving into a sneer or fake.
“So, what do we do now?” He asks.
“Do you have any boundaries you don’t want crossed?”
He shakes his head, “I want this to be believable.”
Without warning, you tug him forward by his shirt, planting your lips on his.
You don’t open your eyes to see if he’s shocked or not, but soon you feel his lips moving with yours.
His large hand travels to cup the side of your face.
You don’t know how long you’re kissing for, or rather making out at this point, but you’re interrupted by the bell ringing.
As you pull away, Jungwon looks as if he’s in a daze.
Your eyes look around the courtyard and multiple people are staring at you, looking away quickly when they realize they’ve been caught.
“Bye boyfriend, I’ll see you later.” You wink, getting up from the bench and leaving to go to class.
The end of the school day comes quicker than not, and you wait outside for your friend Ningning so you can drive her home.
A hand comes to rest on your waist, and you turn to find Jungwon standing beside you.
“I figured I’d get your number now so none of our friends suspect us.”
You nod, taking his phone and putting your number in, texting yourself quickly.
You save his number in your own phone as “wonnie ❤️” while he saves yours as “babe 🩷.”
“You drive Ningning to school right?”
“Yeah, why?”
“I’ll start driving the both of you, just text me your address and I’ll pick you up first tomorrow.”
“Sounds good, we should also figure out some kind of timeline for this relationship. When do we wanna say this started?”
Jungwon ponders for a moment, “A few months ago? Not too specific but not suspicious either. We could say after a while the dislike toward one another became tired and we decided to be friends which then developed into a relationship.”
“And why did we hide it?”
“Because we were embarrassed.” He shrugs and you nod along.
“Sounds good, we can figure out details later.”
Out in the parking lot, his group of friends are all staring at you. “I should get home,” Jungwon says, “we’re all hanging at my place and I know they’re dying to ask me about us.”
“Call me tonight?”
He nods, wrapping you up in a hug, pulling away to kiss your lips.
You can’t help but like the feeling of his lips on yours, or maybe it’s because you haven’t felt the kiss of someone in so long.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re obsessed with my lips. You like kissing me.” Jungwon smirks at your reddening cheeks.
“Please, it’s just been a while. The feeling is nice is all,” you respond, pushing him lightly.
He raises his hands in surrender before walking away, toward his friends whose eyes are on him like a hawk.
“What the actual fuck is going on!” You hear Ningning from a mile away as she quickly approaches you, “Why the hell did I have to find out from Minji that you and Jungwon are dating?”
“I’ll explain in the car.”
Ningning doesn’t hesitate to ask a million and one questions about your newfound relationship, and you answer to the best of your abilities without making too many plot holes.
You tell her about the new arrangement with Jungwon picking you both up which she agrees to easily.
After dropping her off, you make your way home to relax and de-stress.
You shower before changing into more comfortable clothes.
Your parents won’t be home for a while so you sit on the couch, watching Netflix with an after school snack.
You must’ve fallen asleep on the couch because when you open your eyes, you’re in your room and not on the couch.
You check for your phone, finding it on the nightstand beside you.
The time reads 8:00pm and you sigh. Now you’ll be up all night.
Your phone begins to ring, Jungwon’s name popping up.
“Hello,” you say, grogginess evident in your voice.
“Did I wake you?”
“No, I just woke up. I fell asleep after school, my dad must’ve moved me from the couch to my bed.”
“Okay, good. Did Ningning bombard you with questions? Because my friends did.”
“She absolutely did. I stuck with our plan and tried to avoid any personal questions.”
“Speaking of, I figured we should learn more about each other if we’re gonna make this work.”
You agree and begin asking each other questions.
Favorite color, hobbies, family info, things that a couple should know about one another.
You learn that you and Jungwon actually have a lot in common. You both love action movies, dogs, cats, food of course among other things.
It feels very normal talking to him like this, and not arguing or making jabs at each other.
It feels like you’ve been on the phone forever, checking the time as it reads 10:00pm.
“We’ve been on the phone for 2 hours. It’s crazy how quickly time passes.”
You hum, feeling yourself start to get tired again.
“Are you sleepy?” Jungwon asks, and you hum once more.
“Then we should cut this call here, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The only response Jungwon gets is your quiet breathing on the other end, knowing you’ve fallen asleep.
He smiles on his end, ending the call before going to sleep himself.
The next morning, Jungwon texts you that he’ll be there to pick you up at 7:15, then you’ll swing by Ningning’s.
You get ready quietly, deciding to dress up a bit.
When Jungwon arrives, you get in the passenger's side of his car, wishing him good morning.
“Morning,” he says before kissing your cheek.
You smile, side eyeing him slightly, “You know you don’t have to kiss me when we’re not around others.”
You see his cheeks flush pink, “I know, but I figured it’s better to be as natural as possible.”
“Ah, okay. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you just like kissing me,” you say, throwing his words from yesterday back at him.
“Pft!”
You playfully argue all the way to Ningning’s house.
When she gets in the car, she greets you and Jungwon like this is a normal occurrence.
You talk with Ningning the rest of the way to school, with Jungwon chiming in every once in a while.
When you arrive, Ningning leaves first, needing to see a teacher before class.
You and Jungwon get out, and he takes your hand in his larger one while he carries both your bag and his.
“Who knew you were such a sweetheart?” You laugh as he glares at you halfheartedly.
The cafeteria is where students wait for class to start if they’re at school early, so you and Jungwon find a quiet corner to occupy.
His friends come in and make their way to you.
They all greet you, albeit hesitantly as if this is all still one big prank.
You realize you’ve never taken the time to get to know any of them either, just associating them with Jungwon.
They’re actually very funny, making you laugh freely.
When the bell rings, everyone disperses.
Jungwon kisses you goodbye before handing you your bag and making his way to class while you do the same.
In class, you’re just doing self work, but people still talk quietly.
“Hey, Y/N,” a voice says from beside you.
You look up to see Yoona, the girl Jungwon was talking about.
“Hey Yoona, what’s up?” You whisper, trying not to draw any attention.
“I just wanted to ask you… since when have you and Jungwon been dating?”
She’s asking, that must mean she’s at least somewhat interested, right? This could be good for Jungwon.
“A few months. We just didn’t tell anyone cause we were kinda embarrassed.”
“Ah, I see. Good for you.”
You thank her and she goes back to her work while you do the same.
During lunch, which you unfortunately don’t share with Jungwon, you text him about Yoona.
“That’s cool, our plan must be working 😈,” he responds.
You eat with Ningning, gossiping as you always do.
Later on, Ningning texts you to tell you she won’t need a ride home. She has a project to work on with a classmate so they’re going to her house.
That leaves you and Jungwon alone in his car at the end of the day.
“Do you wanna come over?” He asks.
“Sure.”
The drive to his home is quiet, but he stops at the coffee shop to get you both something.
Your large caramel macchiato is delicious and you promise to pay Jungwon back but he dismisses you with a wave of his hand.
“Nothing’s too much for my girl.”
You don’t know why your heart beats so fast when he says that.
Arriving at his home, you leave your backpack in his car. He invites you inside and a white ball of fluff greets you eagerly.
It’s a dog and it sniffs you before jumping on your legs.
“This is Maeum,” Jungwon says, picking up the dog. “He likes meeting new people.”
“Hi Maeum!” You take the dog into your arms and he nuzzles into you immediately.
After he’s been put down, Jungwon takes you to his room.
“Do you wanna watch a movie?” He asks, and you agree.
He lets you choose and you pick a recently released action film.
As you lay on his bed, Jungwon puts his arm around you, pulling you close.
The sunlight from outside shines into the room, illuminating it in a beautiful glow.
As Jungwon seems to be entirely grossed in the movie, you take the opportunity to look at him.
His dark hair is fluffy, his bangs laying on his forehead.
His jaw is sharp even as he’s relaxed and his eyes are big and wide, watching the screen intently.
You admire his face, his nose is long and big, something you’ve always found attractive.
His lips are plump and so, so kissable as you already know.
You can’t help it, you take his face into your hand, turning it towards you.
“What?” He asks, staring into your eyes.
You lean forward, connecting your lips with his.
He responds immediately, pressing harder.
You move before you even realize it, swinging your leg over his lap to straddle him.
You’re making out eagerly, running your hands through his hair while his hands travel down your back to eventually rest on your thighs.
His tongue meets yours as it gets hotter inside the room.
You don’t know how long you spend there, your body pressed against his.
By the time you separate, both your lips and his are red and swollen.
Jungwon’s eyes are narrowed as they stare at you.
“What?”
“You must really like me or something,” he says, giggling as you hit his chest before moving to get off him.
“No,” he stops you, “stay here.”
You end up laying on top of him.
It’s quiet and he’s playing with your hair, gently, trying not to disturb you.
Time passes and before you know it, it’s 8:00 pm.
“I have to go home,” you tell Jungwon, who whines in protest.
“Don’t want you to go.”
“I know, but I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Jungwon concedes, and you both get up so he can drive you home.
The drive is quick and he’s bidding you goodbye, not before giving you a kiss.
After doing your night routine, you lay in bed, thoughts full of Jungwon.
It’s only been two days since your plan started but you feel different.
You feel happier, happier than you already were.
Is it because of Jungwon? You feel like the answer is obvious but you’re too afraid to admit it.
The next couple of days follow the same routine. You and Jungwon meet in the morning and hang out after school.
He takes you out for ice cream and coffee, takes you to the local park to have a picnic and more.
This fake relationship starts to feel more and more real everyday.
“Heeseung is hosting a party tomorrow, do you wanna go?” Jungwon asks, watching the tv while you pay attention to your phone.
You look up, “Sure.”
Jungwon hums in acknowledgment, his arm coming to wrap around your shoulders.
You unknowingly lean into his chest.
The next day, Saturday, you do nothing until it’s time to get ready for the party.
You find a pretty dress in your closet, one that’s not too revealing but just enough.
You text Jungwon a picture.
y/n: what do you think :p
wonnie ❤️: you look beautiful 🥰 i’ll be there in 5
In the car, you and Jungwon agree to stick together and send a text if you get separated.
The party is already thriving by the time you arrive.
You and Jungwon hold hands, walking through and greeting people.
You find the other guys in the kitchen, pouring drinks.
They greet you cheerfully, handing you a drink of something. You don’t know what it is, but it tastes good so you don’t complain.
You and Jungwon make your way to the dance floor, where your bodies are pressed against one another tightly.
After some time, you excuse yourself to the bathroom.
“Do you want me to come with you? I’ll stand outside?” Jungwon asks but you shake your head.
“I’ll be fine.”
Heeseung directs you to the bathroom upstairs.
You pass by people on your way there.
The light isn’t on and you knock, no one answers.
Once you deem it safe, you enter.
You lock the door and do your business.
After washing your hands, you make your way back downstairs.
Before you re-enter the living room, you hear two voices that sound familiar.
You choose to ignore it, wanting to find Jungwon.
You search for him for 5 minutes before giving up.
Making your way to the backyard, it’s empty, to your relief.
You sit on the outside table, breathing in the fresh air.
“Hey, I was looking for you,” Jungwon says from behind you.
“I was looking for you too but I got impatient after 5 minutes.” You laugh as he takes a seat beside you.
“Yoona came up to me,” he says.
“Oh? What’d she have to say?”
Jungwon takes a deep breath in, “She confessed to me.”
Oh.
“Oh? That’s…great, no? This is what you wanted. That means we can end this whole thing and—”
“I rejected her,” Jungwon says firmly.
Your eyebrows furrow in confusion, “But the whole plan was to get her to fall for you, I don’t understand?”
“I rejected her because I realized that I really like you. I know it’s only been a couple of days but you’re nothing like I thought you were. We feuded because I was being petty. I never took the time to really get to know you. You’re…amazing, to put it lightly. You’re smart and kind, funny, we have so much in common and at this point I don’t see myself with anyone except you.”
You reel in Jungwon’s confession. Here you thought he was going to break everything off.
“Jungwon, I like you too, a lot.”
He lets out a breath you didn’t realize he was holding, “You do?”
“Yeah, I’ve realized how sweet and kind you are. The thought of you being with Yoona made me crazy but I didn’t want to get hurt by rejection.”
“Well you don’t have to worry. You have me, no matter what.”
He kisses you, fiery and passionately.
The next day as you walk hand in hand with Jungwon around town, you think you’ve hit the jackpot.
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© AEWON 2024
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ebenelephant · 1 day ago
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Look, I think you're misconstruing some of my points and since this is reaching way farther than I wanted I would like to clarify for a second. This was kind of a bit of a rant post which I didn't expect people other than like 4 mutuals to... see? So as you can imagine I wasn't exactly my best articulated. Some of my points have definitely come across wrong, so to try and explain what I mean a little better:
I'm not saying we should see more flashbacks to Tom's life. This is a criticism I have of this plot point not being thought through, more than anything. It tells us something other that what was probably intended because you get the impression that Rowling didn't really consider the wider implications of what she was saying in the time period it was set. I'm not suggesting this should be delved deeper into, I'm just suggesting that it wasnt the best thought through.
With the Weasleys I just messed up the timeline on this one. I do genuinely have issues with some of the portrayal of the Weasleys which I won't get into, but this one is my mistake.
The Snape one is more of a personal gripe. My tongue in cheek remark about being "surprised you caught onto that" is in reference to the fact that I have heard/seen multiple people just glossing over that context to his life entirely - either because they missed it of because it was too minor for them to care.
My issue with the Hermione thing isn't actually that she obliviated her parents – as you say, this makes sense with her character – but rather how underutilised they are. We meet the parents and guardians of other, less important characters when they're thematically and narratively relevant, and given how important Hermione's status as a muggleborn is in the books you would think they would be both. It always seemed a weird choice to me that her parents are practically non-entities, spoken of occasionally but never seen. It's the show-don't-tell thing: we are told that Hermione loves her parent a lot, and of course we know this to be true, but the biggest time they are really relevant is when she obliviates them. Even if Harry had just seen them once, maybe sending Hermione to platform 9¾, and had seen them in contrast to the Dursleys this would have given them more weight. Hermione is distraught, but we as the reader are much less emotionally involved because we have no idea who these people are.
The Lily point honestly feels like a bad faith arguement, because she was never just 'the main character's long dead mum', she was the person who saved him, who made him the chosen one, who is referenced throughout the series, and who is directly related to the actions of multiple characters. I would literally just like consistent characterisation for her, because the way she is spoken about doesn't align with the ways we see her acting in the few scenes she has, and even in those scenes she is somewhat contradictory. This is never addressed by Harry the way it's addressed when he learns the negative qualities of his father – though in a book targeted at a 9-12 audience you would certainly expect it to be. This makes me think, again: oversight. Kids books have to guide the reader somewhat, and this aspect doesn't really do that. Could've been a great addition to that "nobody's perfect" theme JKR had going, but wasn't executed in a way properly accessible to a nine year old as opposed to other points in the series.
thinking again about jk rowling being a bad writer. like, we all know about the massive flaws in her worldbuilding and i hope by now it's clear she's a bigot on basically every front. (hello, regular reminder that she doesn't even actually like women.) but like. she's especially good at dropping bits of lore and then those not being relevant in the fucking slightest. riddle was told to go home to his orphanage in london during what would have very much been the blitz? whatever. the weasley's are so strapped for cash that they're sending their son to school with a potentially dangerous broken wand? of course they're spending their lottery winnings on visiting their adult son in egypt, what else would they do. snape grew up in what was likely a dying northern industrial town with abusive/neglectful parents, largely cut off from the magical world? almost impressed you caught on to that, with how little it's expanded on. yes hermione has a supposedly good relationship with both her parents, no we're not going to show you it at all, yes she's going to wipe they're memories like it's nothing. lily evans is the moral compass of james and basically the most important person in the series but fuck you if you want to actually know anything about her lmao. even what little we see is wildly inconsistent.
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cavedraconem · 22 hours ago
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Local Maximums
A while back I read an opinion piece my a woman who was upset about the state of grocery shopping these days. I can't really disagree with the basic premise that food in NZ is too expensive and this causes a lot of trouble for people who are living paycheck to paycheck. And shopping at the supermarket can be pretty stressful for a variety of reasons!
BUT, when the writer started to describe her shopping process... it was a massive odyssey. Of a Saturday she was dragging herself and her kids through multiple different shops - a Pak n Save, a Countdown, a fruit & veggie shop, maybe even a butcher as well - looking for the cheapest everything to stretch her budget, the particular whatever her husband wanted, the brand of snacks that her autistic child would eat. Of course she was sitting in traffic and fighting for parking and struggling with the kids and navigating trolleys at every single one of these locations. It sounded incredibly stressful! And she was incredibly stressed about it by the time she got home (and so were the kids).
"Surely just buying food shouldn't be this difficult?" she cried. And, well... no, I don't think it should be. Obviously I don't know every detail of this woman's life and I probably have extreme DINK privilege, but the ordeal she tried to pose as relatable seemed to me largely self-inflicted. Some of these issues seem trivially solvable: if you know your kid will only eat one type of snack, why wouldn't you just buy ten boxes at once? Can you plan ahead and click & collect any of these shops so you don't have to drag the kids around the supermarket itself? Can you pop out by yourself on a quiet evening?
And then we get into some more speculative cost-benefit questions that will depend on the exact details. Are the vegetables from the fruit & veggie shop cheaper enough to make up for the petrol you spend driving there? (Petrol is also expensive in my beautiful country.) What value do you really place on your time and stress? Is the money saved or the special thing for your husband really, genuinely worth the effort? If you are doing all of this work to save money, could you instead work a bit more to earn more money instead? Add a couple of extra hours a week onto your contract so you can afford to shop at a nicer supermarket or get groceries delivered, and save that much time or more on the weekend, plus less screaming from your children.
(By the way, I got that last idea from an old flatmate of mine. His philosophy was that it was better for him to work an extra hour every night and get takeaways for dinner than to spend that hour cooking something cheaper but not very good. I would have been more convinced by this [and his related opinions about division of labour] if he hadn't been allowing his PhD student girlfriend to cook him literally three meals a day.)
Anyway, this writer spectacularly failed to make her problems relatable to me, but there probably is something to be learned here. It's about how easy it is to reach a local maximum in your life: where you look at what you're doing and think, this is the best way I could possibly be doing it. But you're wrong! Maybe you've optimised your routine along one axis (e.g. cost) but totally neglected other axes (e.g. time/stress). You're making tradeoffs that you don't realise you're making. Things that you think are non-negotiable might actually be pretty easy to compromise on. It can take an outside perspective and a bit of convincing or experimentation to even realise that other possibilities exist, and maybe some of them are even better than what you're doing now.
So, in the end it's a good reminder to me to question my routines and ask whether I've trapped myself in any local maximums. What is stressing me out now that could be easier? Does everyone else have so much trouble with this? What opportunities am I missing? Surely it shouldn't be this difficult?
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the-great-papyru · 3 days ago
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been thinking about how going through and getting used to the resets would genuinely limit flowey’s ability to do… well, basic things. like form conversations.
think about it. he’s scripted everything. and he’s had all the time in the world to work on scripts, too.
what if he hears someone talk, and through unrelated circumstances they say something they usually say in another, unrelated scenario. like… i dunno, when toriel gets killed in a certain way, she’ll say something along the lines of “how could anyone do something like this?” and flowey’s prone to responding with “oh, you haven’t even SEEN what i’ve done to papyrus!” because he knows if he does she’ll remember papyrus’ name and, if he times it right, warn sans, and that has a snowball affect that leads to his run being much more interesting.
and then toriel says the line post-pacifist for whatever reason (maybe she’s reading the news) and absentmindedly flowey immediately responds with his usual reply.
he gets several strong looks, and papyrus checks his back to make sure flowey didn’t attach a sticky note with the words “kick me” on it again.
or, okay, he’s used to thinking through responses until he finds the perfect one. sans gives him a “heya” and he spends 2 minutes trying to figure out what he means by that greeting, what he knows (flowey’s been struggling maintaining his pre-prepared facial expressions lately for some reason, no idea why) and how to respond in a way that doesn’t let on that he knows sans knows, but also let him know that he’s not letting down his guard, not to mention figuring out what face to say it with… by then, of course, sans has muttered a brief “uh. okay then” and walked away. and flowey can’t just reload to finally let loose his carefully crafted reply like he’s used to, either.
he honestly probably finds it easiest to talk to frisk. he doesn’t have a running tally of their likes and dislikes. so he doesn’t have enough to base lines on, and he’ll sometimes even end up saying the first thing that comes to his mind. crazy.
also. i don’t know about you, but when i get multiple choices in a video game i often choose the clearly “wrong” answer just to see what people say. you can’t progress after choosing it, anyway, so there’s no real loss.
i wonder if flowey has that same mentality. it might do a lot more than make people angry, though. like… let’s say toriel asks him “what would you like to eat for dinner today?” and he goes with eggplant parmigiana, he hates eggplant parmigiana it’s gross and chewy and obviously the wrong answer. and he just wants to see what she’ll say before he reloads and chooses the right answer (snails). he realizes too late what he just did.
so yeah, flowey would really struggle with talking, i think. it’d be a learning curve for sure. he’ll figure it out, of course, but it’ll take a while.
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dorykinny · 3 months ago
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“Is that Tommyinnit, Grian, or the new percy jackson fanart?”
“Is that Quackity, Keith Kogane, Asch from my inner demons, or Nico Di angelo fanart?”
“Is that Tubbo or hiccup fanart?”
“Is that Deku, Alex Fierro, or one of superman’s kids?”
That’s it! I’m already face blind, i cant even tell characters apart now, i’m mushing them all into one character and you can’t stop me.
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hearteyespierce · 3 months ago
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god the hits really don’t stop fucking coming do they.
#genuinely cannot take much more of this#i hit my limit about 4 weeks ago#and it just won’t fucking stop#coming up on six weeks of having varying levels of Horrors(tm) happening to me on a weekly basis#and sometimes multiple Horrors(tm) in a week#lost my job#my cat died#had an asbestos scare#my partner’s cat almost died#he had to have emergency surgery#and then when he came home had to go straight back to the emergency vet to have emergency surgery a second time bc they fucked up#had a huge fight with my partner bc oh yeah this whole time we’ve also been moving!!!#but there was some stupidly unnecessary drama around the security deposit/getting the old house clean#and this whole time while grieving and losing my income and all of this shit I am also still a disabled/chronically ill person#so I’m forcing my body to keep working through increasingly instense flare ups#on top of all of this we have a houseguest who has vastly overstayed their welcome.#they’ve been here for SIX WEEKS and are showing no signs of going home#so much shit has happened in the past six weeks that I don’t even know if I’m remembering all of it here in these tags#and now. I have been denied for unemployment and received a notice that I have to pay back what they already paid me#bc i ‘missed the deadline to verify my identity’#except they NEVER SENT ME THE IDENTITY VERIFICATION LETTER#I’ve been keeping an eye out for it and I’ve kept every letter I’ve received from them#nothing has the verification password.#I filed an appeal but the confirmation page said it could take weeks to get a hearing#so what the fuck am I supposed to do in the meantime#i wish I were fucking dead to be honest#that would be preferable to the last six weeks
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avianii · 9 months ago
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vaguely irritated every time I hear someone call my life depressing
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flori-fauna-fear · 2 months ago
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How did I not know Midnight Mass has a goddamn VAMPIRE IN IT.
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agirlinthegalaxy · 3 months ago
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Something I see frequently is fans wanting characters like Elle Greenaway or Nathan Harris to return as unsubs in Criminal Minds, which. I'll be completely honest, I hate the idea for a lot of the suggested characters because it feels so undeniably tragic and hopeless that someone will inevitably become a killer, even if they don't want to become one. Yes, a lot of the unsubs have some kind of tragic backstory, but the thing is that they're still awful people (excluding very very few). I feel like having previous characters return as the unsub paints this picture that you're unable to break the cycle of violence or that you're destined to become a monster, which is just such a honestly tragic message, especially for a show that's already pretty dark.
I'm not opposed to characters reappearing, but I'd much prefer that if those characters appeared again that it'd be in the vein of them having undergone some kind of healing and growth and be able to find themselves some kind of peace and satisfaction in where they are in life. Let them reappear, but don't transform them into monsters but a symbol of the healing and growth available to survivors and the other characters.
#criminal minds#elle greenaway#nathan harris#don't get me wrong i get WHY ppl want it#like elle as an unsub would (admittedly in previous years when her teammates were still there) have been a v dramatic and interesting story#but at the same time... let her heal. she went through some really traumatic stuff and wasnt able to handle it and walked away#let her heal and find peace and leave behind the violence#or nathan harris! like that one admittedly always bugs me bc the idea that a kid who tried to kill himself rather than hurt someone#ends up ultimately becoming a killer anyways is genuinely so tragic and devasting and just hopeless#i just feel like a lot of these perpetuates the idea that you can't break the cycle of abuse or violence#or that you're unable to overcome the difficulties in your life or mind and your fate is sealed#which is genuinely the most fucking tragic ass theme that i've ever heard#like is that really what people want the show's message to be?#no matter how hard you try you will inevitably become what you fear and/or you will perpetuate the violence you experienced#i HATE that message#its why i really dislike how multiple characters reappear later as unsubs especially characters like lindsey vaughn and david smith#like what is the implication here? you're destined to continue the cycle of violence that your parents began?#you'll never be free from the violence you witnessed? you were just a child but your fate has been sealed anyways?#especially with so many of our mcs as well having dealt with serious trauma in their past#are they also destined to become their parents/abusers?#it just feels like a v hopeless message tbh which doesnt feel great when the show is already pretty dark#instead of characters coming back as unsubs i'd love to see them be able to help as teachers or guidance counselors or therapists#or anything really tbh like. show me that they're able to find peace despite what was done to them.#show me that while the trauma may be a part of you it is not all you are
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batsbaby · 4 months ago
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I don’t talk a lot about my family life on here tbh but I have been getting harassed nearly non-stop by my sister since January 2021 (started when my grandma was passing away and I was doing her hospice care and hasn’t stopped since then), and before that had been getting harassed periodically for over 10 years, and I’m at my damn limit folks LOL
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objectosexual · 6 months ago
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Tumblr objectum nation send me good vibes that everything regarding my car will end up okay
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tbcanary · 1 year ago
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yet again i say everyone who argues about what is and is not in character for jason needs to stop fighting each other and unite against our common enemy, scott fucking lobdell
#i'm looking back through outlaws for an edit#and like i have such. feelings. i have so many feelings.#this is the first comic i read! and there are parts of it i still genuinely enjoy and which tug at my emotions in certain ways!#but going back to it now after having read other things is so. like.#what the fuCK#WHAT THE FUCK !!!#it's funny to me. it's honestly hysterical. like i'm not mad about it to be clear i've been cackling over it for an hour#i think it's so. like. why did they do this. why did they give jason evil-sensing blades and a background with a magical monk society#why did they do roy so dirty. why did they do KORI so dirty.#i love the three of them as a relationship and a dynamic but so much of this comic is absolute nonsense kjvnxkbjngk#anyway. ANYWAY.#i will die on the hill of like. the reason why everyone has such warped views of jason is because his rewrites have completely changed him#like every single aspect of him#multiple times#and so it's really hard actually to get a grip on who he is! because like. do you want the bloodthirsty one who kept trying to kill tim.#or do you want the somewhat relatable (weakly written) young lost man looking for love and family wherever he can get it#or do you do what i do and treat them as two separate characters in two separate boxes in your mind closet#so that you don't have to consider the fact that everything about him is absolute jumbled fucking nonsense#this also goes for j/a/y/r/o/y. a ship i absolutely adore and love.#it's very like. ok which version of jason tho. which version of roy. it had better not be outlaws roy i will gut you--#i have so many feelings about this little trio. this post is brought to you by jason saying kori would never have to know life without him.#THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE PLATONIC. ALLEGEDLY. NORMAL BESTIE MOMENTS.#ugh. ugh ugh guhhhhgiuuhbngjkn ugh.#don't cancel me for enjoying some parts of outlaws ok. i have a complicated relationship it's not uncritical it's just that i love them.#text.tb
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orcelito · 2 years ago
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Really is a coping kinda night huh lmao
#speculation nation#negative/#im not going to sit outside. im not going to do anything productive.#bc if i do i might just [redacted]#im going to go home. im going to eat. and then im going to do whatever my cursed little heart desires.#be it video game or drink myself stupid#ykno it's kinda funny that i have therapy tomorrow morning. i almost want to cancel.#it's supposed to be just general problems discussion. i dont even know this woman yet.#but im having. erm. secondhand response i guess#probably also having to do with personal stress with dnd group problems and imminent project due AND having to take on Even More hours#but im also like. it's a secondhand horror kind of thing. hearing about it and seeing people i know deal with it#and working to take on some of the burden for them bc theyre fucking traumatized like hell im going to make them work#and just... hearing about it in general. the knowledge that it happened. the aching empathy for what theyre going through.#it's got me all kinds of fucked up lmfaooo#im being bombarded on multiple sides rn and this really fucking sucks#couldnt have been a worse time for this to happen. bc i STILL have my fucking project & presentation due next week#i know drinking in this kind of mood isnt great. but listen lmfao it's better than me [redacted]. lesser of two evils and all.#sorry i keep talking about this here but it's kinda genuinely life disrupting. & very thoroughly disturbing.#and i cleaned the fucking fryer filter today. worst day for me to do that too. but it needed done.#too much stress not enough release. i really wish i could cry about it.#but nooo i have tear ducts of the desert. no emotional release for me lmfaoooo#at least i have food. im gonna eat plenty and take care of myself. it's the least i can do to try to make things okay.#alcohol ment/#continuing being vague about what happened but it's something that's wormed its way into my brain#dont have to experience it myself for the knowledge of it to negatively affect me. such is the reality of someone with Bad Brain.#wild to hate someone so much who ive never met and is already dead. you total piece of shit. i hope you rot in hell.
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kvetchs · 2 years ago
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tagged by @repurposedmeatlocker (<3 aaa! tysm!!!! :) to post my favorite first listens of 2022! here are a few:
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surf’s up (the beach boys) // magnetic south (the first national band) // pisces, capricorn, aquarius, & jones (the monkees)
& these versions of tchaikovsky’s ballets:
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swan lake (andré previn) // sleeping beauty (antal doráti)
i tag anyone who wants to post songs/albums/music that they listened to & enjoyed for the first time in 2022 :) <3
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loverboybrightsideghost · 1 month ago
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they should invent a me that's good at everything i want to be good at. [thing from the addams family pokes out of a nearby box and hands me a piece of paper] thank you, thing. what's this...oh! why, it's a paper that says i have to be the one to do that for my future self! huh.
#bluebird.txt#post brought to you by IM FRUSTRATED AND ANNOYED BUT GRITTING MY TEETH AND KNOWING THAT I WILL NOT LET MYSELF FAIL IN THE LONG TERM#EVEN IF FUCK UP NOW YOU GOTTA FUCK UP A LOT BEFORE YOU GET ANYWHERE NEAR WHERE YOU WANNA BE#AND I'M DOING GREAT#AND ALSO I HAVE GENUINELY BEEN GOING THROUGH SO MUCH HEALTH SHIT RECENTLY THAT I LEGITIMATELY WAS COMPLETELY UNABLE TO THINK OF#ALMOST ANYTHING SCHOOL RELATED AT ALL CAUSING ME TO FORGET MULTIPLE ASSIGNMENTS AND BE LATE TO A MIDTERM#AND IT SUCKS BUT SOMETIMES THERE REALLY IS A GOOD REASON FOR WHY YOU COULD NOT DO AS MYCH AS YOU WANTED#AND MAYBE YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO DO AS MUCH AS YOU WANT AT ONCE#BUT TAKE IT SLOWLY AND ONE DAY AT A TIME AND SOME DAYS YOU WILL FEEL LACKING BUT JUST THINK OF ALL#THE GOOD WORK YOU'VE ALREADY DONE#MORE WILL COME YOU WILL BE FINE#I AM FRUSTRATED NOW AND THAT IS FINE AND I AM NOT WHERE I WANT TO BE IN MANY WAYS BUT I HAD A HEALTH SETBACK#THAT FORCED ME TO BE UNABLE TO DO SHIT I NEEDED TO DO AND NOW YOU SIMPLY JUST GOTTA GET BACK INTO IT#EVEN IF ITS SLOW AND EVEN IF YOU 'SHOULD' BE BETTER#SHOULD IS A BULLSHIT FUCKING WORD IN THIS CASE#YOU ARE. I AM. AND I WILL CONTINUE BEING. I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS YEAR AND ACTUALLY IT WILL NOT KILL ME.#I'M JUST GONNA MAKE IT THROUGH THIS YEAR. AND THIS ORCHESTRA CYCLE. AND THEN I CAN GO ON VACATION. AND DO MENTAL PRACTICE.#AND MY BEST. AND YOUR BEST DOESN'T MEAN PERFECT OR EVEN THAT FOOD SOMETIMES IT JUST MEANS DO WHAT YOU CAN.#me when im taking it easy but taking it#sorry i gotta hype myself up cuz if i let myself feel bad about myself that's stupid and dumb and im better than that#if im not aggressively positive ill explode and my life will fall apart around me and i will NOT let myself be miserable again#last month was out of my control mostly. i will however not take 19 credits next semester!#girls when. RAAAGGGGGGHHHH RIPS OFF MY SHIRT I AM ALIVE AT LEAST AND THATS PRETTY COOL#me when i paused like seven times typing this to cough hard
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ai-art-thieves · 3 months ago
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It's Time To Investigate SevenArt.ai
sevenart.ai is a website that uses ai to generate images.
Except, that's not all it can do.
It can also overlay ai filters onto images to create the illusion that the algorithm created these images.
And its primary image source is Tumblr.
It scrapes through the site for recent images that are at least 10 days old and has some notes attached to it, as well as copying the tags to make the unsuspecting user think that the post was from a genuine user.
No image is safe. Art, photography, screenshots, you name it.
Initially I thought that these are bots that just repost images from their site as well as bastardizations of pictures across tumblr, until a user by the name of @nataliedecorsair discovered that these "bots" can also block users and restrict replies.
Not only that, but these bots do not procreate and multiply like most bots do. Or at least, they have.
The following are the list of bots that have been found on this very site. Brace yourself. It's gonna be a long one:
@giannaaziz1998blog
@kennedyvietor1978blog
@nikb0mh6bl
@z4uu8shm37
@xguniedhmn
@katherinrubino1958blog
@3neonnightlifenostalgiablog
@cyberneticcreations58blog
@neomasteinbrink1971blog
@etharetherford1958blog
@punxajfqz1
@camicranfill1967blog
@1stellarluminousechoblog
@whwsd1wrof
@bnlvi0rsmj
@steampunkstarshipsafari90blog
@surrealistictechtales17blog
@2steampunksavvysiren37blog
@krispycrowntree
@voucwjryey
@luciaaleem1961blog
@qcmpdwv9ts
@2mplexltw6
@sz1uwxthzi
@laurenesmock1972blog
@rosalinetritsch1992blog
@chereesteinkirchner1950blog
@malindamadaras1996blog
@1cyberneticdreamscapehubblog
@neomasteinbrink1971blog
@neonfuturecityblog
@olindagunner1986blog
@neonnomadnirvanablog
@digitalcyborgquestblog
@freespiritfusionblog
@piacarriveau1990blog
@3technoartisticvisionsblog
@wanderlustwineblissblog
@oyqjfwb9nz
@maryannamarkus1983blog
@lashelldowhower2000blog
@ovibigrqrw
@3neonnightlifenostalgiablog
@ywldujyr6b
@giannaaziz1998blog
@yudacquel1961blog
@neotechcreationsblog
@wildernesswonderquest87blog
@cybertroncosmicflow93blog
@emeldaplessner1996blog
@neuralnetworkgallery78blog
@dunstanrohrich1957blog
@juanitazunino1965blog
@natoshaereaux1970blog
@aienhancedaestheticsblog
@techtrendytreks48blog
@cgvlrktikf
@digitaldimensiondioramablog
@pixelpaintedpanorama91blog
@futuristiccowboyshark
@digitaldreamscapevisionsblog
@janishoppin1950blog
The oldest ones have been created in March, started scraping in June/July, and later additions to the family have been created in July.
So, I have come to the conclusion that these accounts might be run by a combination of bot and human. Cyborg, if you will.
But it still doesn't answer my main question:
Who is running the whole operation?
The site itself gave us zero answers to work with.
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No copyright, no link to the engine where the site is being used on, except for the sign in thingy (which I did.)
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I gave the site a fake email and a shitty password.
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Turns out it doesn't function like most sites that ask for an email and password.
Didn't check the burner email, the password isn't fully dotted and available for the whole world to see, and, and this is the important thing...
My browser didn't detect that this was an email and password thingy.
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And there was no log off feature.
This could mean two things.
Either we have a site that doesn't have a functioning email and password database, or that we have a bunch of gullible people throwing their email and password in for people to potentially steal.
I can't confirm or deny these facts, because, again, the site has little to work with.
The code? Generic as all hell.
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Tried searching for more information about this site, like the server it's on, or who owned the site, or something. ANYTHING.
Multiple sites pulled me in different directions. One site said it originates in Iceland. Others say its in California or Canada.
Luckily, the server it used was the same. Its powered by Cloudflare.
Unfortunately, I have no idea what to do with any of this information.
If you have any further information about this site, let me know.
Until there is a clear answer, we need to keep doing what we are doing.
Spread the word and report about these cretins.
If they want attention, then they are gonna get the worst attention.
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