#i have another i already sorta did the math for but i need to double check a few things about it

[toraavanak]

Writing and especially worldbuilding is so funny sometimes because I can tell you the details of a multi-decade astronomical cycle but I can't tell you the name of the mentor who trained my mc

[snowdice]

Gaps in His Files (Part 14) [Relabeled; Refiled Series]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Logan/Patton

Characters:

Main: Logan, Patton

Appear: Remy, Virgil (but only in the epilogue)

Summary:

Logan Berry has learned many things the last 10 years: a lot of math and physics, a bit of humility, and how to be a hero being just a few. Through his education, his experience teaching, and his exploits as the superhero Bluebird, he’s changed in a lot of small and large ways. He has recorded these changes in well-organized documents and files. He’s even had to create two new file designations: a red one for files about his moonlighting at Bluebird, and a light blue one dedicated to his boyfriend, Patton.

When Bluebird is targeted by a memory device and all of those 10 years of progress suddenly disappear, Patton Sanders and Logan’s extensive files are left as his only resource to get those memories back. But what is Patton supposed to do when there are clear gaps in his files? And what does he do when he is one of them?

This is set 25 years before Sometimes Labels Fail though it’s story is completely independent of it and it is not necessary to read that one first.

Notes: Superhero AU, memory loss, past child abuse, past child neglect, unhealthy ideas about ones place in relationships, emotional suppression, self-deprecating thoughts, medical procedures mentioned, very brief unhealthy views of sex

They’re so dumb... just... so... dumb.

Note that I just posted Part 13 a minute before this!! Read that first!!!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

When Patton arrived back at his apartment for the first time since Tuesday afternoon (though it felt like it had been much longer), he decided to finally take Remy’s advice. He grabbed a tub of ice cream, sat down on his couch, and just cried for about two hours before he finally fell asleep. He woke to the sound of frantic knocking on his door. Rubbing his eyes, he stumbled to the door and opened it.

“Put this on!” was the first thing the person on the other side of the door said, thrusting a hanger with a white bag covering its contents at Patton.

“Wha?” Patton asked as Logan shoved his way into the apartment.

“We’re going to be late,” Logan stressed. “We can’t be late, Patton!”

“Late for what? Logan what?” God Patton shouldn’t have left him alone. What was he thinking?

“I forgot about the reservations. How could I forget about the reservations, Patton?”

“Logan?” Patton said cautiously. “Are you okay?”

“I am perfectly well, but we need to be to the park by 6, and I have just remembered all of the ways this could go wrong!” As he spoke, he ripped the bag off his own black suit and hung the other hanger up on Patton’s coat closet door before starting to strip out of his trousers.

Patton paused, hopeful. He seemed… more confused than he had been since he’d lost his memories, but… “You remember something?” he asked softly.

“Oh, I remember everything,” he said waving his hand through the air absentmindedly, standing in the middle of Patton’s apartment in his underwear as he grabbed the dress pants and started to struggle into them.

“You remember?” he asked.

“Yes, yes, the coffee shop, the surgery, the dates, you staying over at my place 81.3% of the time because it’s closer to the hospital, the fact that you leave dried up pens all over my living room,” he blathered as he finished fastening the pants. Once he was done with that, he stepped toward Patton and grabbed his face in his hands. “The fact that you will never go along with my plans without some form of argument. Put the suit on Patton!”

Patton gapped at him for a moment before his mouth slammed shut, his hands clenched at his sides, and his eyes started to well with tears. “Maybe lead with that next time,” he spat.

Logan did that double blink thing he did when he was particularly startled by Patton. “Apologies love, you are correct of course,” and oh, how was Patton supposed to stay mad at that? Patton softened, and, when he titled his head up to look him in the eyes, Logan pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I think we may have a lot to talk about,” Logan said softly, and oh. Oh right. Patton hadn’t really thought though the possible consequences of his outburst now that Logan remembered everything. “But right now, we have somewhere we really need to be. I’ve bought you a suit that will look very pretty on you. Will you please put it on for me, love?”

Patton nodded, brain a whirlwind of emotions, but he got another quick sweet kiss out of it that steadied him enough to do as he asked.

The next thing Patton knew, he was literally flying out of his apartment. Logan said it was the only way they’d make it to wherever they were going on time.

Not wanting to be seen, Logan had to land them a couple of blocks away from the busy park in one of the city’s closer suburbs. He kept looking at his watch as he towed Patton by the hand toward the center of the park

“Um, Logan,” Patton said, “it looks like we aren’t supposed to be here. There aren’t any people and it’s blocked off by rope.” He pointed to said rope with his free hand while trying to tug at the hand in Logan’s grip to make him stop.

He paused and turned to Patton. “Dear, please, in,” he glanced at his watch, “five minutes and 53 seconds, I will be happy to do anything you say, but will you just do as I ask for a little under six minutes?”

“I…fine.”

“Good,” Logan proceeded to pull him towards a blocked off area near the base of the fountain. He searched the ground for something and then pointed at a bit of glow-in-the-dark paint. “Stand there,” he said, and Patton did, shooting him a confused look. “Now face me.”

“Okay…”

Logan took a deep breath now that they were in position. “And with over 30 seconds to spare,” he breathed.

“I still have no idea what’s happening,” Patton pointed out.

“I know,” he replied. “I was supposed to have more than 30 seconds. I was going to walk you slowly through the park and buy you a flower from the vender down the street. I was going to distract you enough that you didn’t even notice the ropes blocking people from this spot, but life got in the way. I should have expected it with you being a doctor and me being me. We have busy lives, difficult lives that get in the way a lot of the time. And you said some things the last few days that worry me and we’re going to have to talk about it and where it came from, but I would like to talk about it. Actually, I insist you talk to someone about it even if it isn’t me. Because our lives are complicated and messy and neither of us are perfect in general or even for each other. But maybe that doesn’t matter because despite all of that, we still somehow made it here in time and I think that might mean something. Something really, really important.”

“Logan sweetie, whatever’s going on, it’s alright. You need to calm down.”

“This is traditionally not a calm sort of thing from what I understand. Anyway,” he said, looking at his watch. “It’s time.”

“What are-” At that moment, the fountain next to them started up, the little white lights that had already been lit on it shimmering like little stars in the moving water.

Logan went down on to his knees and pulled a ring out of his pocket.

“Oh my god.”

“Will you marry me?”

“I…” Patton said. “I thought you didn’t want to get married.”

“What gave you that impression?” he asked.

“You… I asked you to marry me and you didn’t say yes.”

“You did not ask me to marry you.”

Patton stared at him. “I said I wanted to marry you and you said to give you more time.”

He looked like a very confused puppy on his knees in front of Patton. “Yes, for the planning. We had discussed that you would want a dramatic proposal after you expressed a desire to be married.”

“Wha- When did that conversation happen?” Patton asked.

“Two years and 11 months ago in the park by the hospital when we saw a man perform a song to propose to a woman. I had said that those types of proposals made me uncomfortable and you asked me why as you believed they were romantic. I explained that the receiving party would likely feel pressured to say yes in front of a crowd and that such an act could be manipulative. You said we could compromise and that it would be alright if they’d already said they wanted to be married and the other person did it to make them feel loved and surprise them about the day and type of ring, but not the question. You said that would be your ideal proposal.”

“Logan that was our second date.”

“Yes.”

Patton sighed. “Oh honey, I love you. I think we really need to work on our communication skills, but I love you.”

“I would agree after the last few days,” Logan said. “I also love you very much.”

Patton looked down at him still on his knees… because he was proposing. Right. “Oh! And yes! Of course, yes!”

Logan smiled at him softly and Patton wanted to jump up and down, but he also wanted to cry a bit and maybe sorta wanted to throw up a little and not just from the entire tub of strawberry ice cream he’d eaten a couple of hours ago. But the thing he most wanted was what he could tell he was about to get. Logan put the ring on his finger (Patton made a note to actually look at the thing sometime later) and got to his feet before sweeping Patton up into a kiss.

Patton drew back from the kiss feeling lighter than he had in days though not nearly completely perfect. He looked around himself. “Oh, wow,” he gushed. “This is so pretty! You’re so pretty! I’m so pretty! I love this suit. Oh, can we take pictures somehow before we leave?”

Logan laughed at him softly. “I hired photographers of course,” he informed him, preening a little bit, “They doubtlessly got pictures of the proposal and the kiss. We can have them take more if you’d like.”

“Oh, those are going to be wonderful pictures with us in front of the fountain like this. This is the most perfect thing I could ever imagine. I love you so much.” He started to get a bit chocked up. Logan pulled him into a hug and gee, that was even better than the kiss had been, especially because they didn’t have to pull away to breathe for a hug. Logan never even tried to pull back even though Patton kept him wrapped up in his arms for far longer than most hugs ever went. He just pressed a kiss to the top of his head and rubbed his back until the ache in Patton’s chest eased enough for him to feel comfortable pulling back himself.

(And then Patton goes to therapy for 5 years and they both go to relationship counseling for 2 years as I have mentioned in Labels Shift. I do plan to eventually do at least a one-shot of Patton in therapy, but I wanted to end on a happier note.)

Want to read more? Here’s the Epilogue.

[kariachi]

We’re finishing up today! Or at least being caught up on what episodes are available to me. But we’ll have all the Kevin episodes done! Which is all we really care about around here!

So, to start us off on a high note before we’re mercilessly slaughtered later- Four By Four!

The regular use of lizards in the foreground of this series pleases me

Talk about seeing double. Also are those boys using gameboy advance? I think they are. Holy shit kids it’s 2019, upgrade

How many identical twins can you have in one park? I’m honestly concerned.

Twin City. This show.

Oh Ben.

“Try not to get us kicked out of this one” Look, Max, there’s some things you just can’t expect.

Max is right, eventually they’re going to run out of Laser Tag establishments

Aw, cousins raring to team up and take down some competition.

“Your color will match with your sibling or closest friend” Uh-huh, and you guys don’t think maybe you should take context clues into account for that? Given they came in together, were getting hyped together, and are now on different teams?

...they think Kevin and Ben are brothers. That answers one question and posits about twelve more. For instance ‘how the fuck?’

Ben is having a existential crisis again and Gwen’s just tired.

And lo, a Kevin arrives. And if anything he’s even more reluctant than Ben. There’s physical force involved in getting him to the Tennysons.

...saw the watches, assumed it a family thing, paired them off. I can’t even. There are no evens to can.

Also these boys are just so pissed off about this.

The boys in the background arguing over whether or not Kevin is really here to enjoy a game of laser tag while the staff try to find Gwen somebody to partner with.

Gwen got teamed up with a grown-ass man. Also Ben being willing to throw a game of laser tag just to make sure Kevin can’t have fun, because the boy is already rubbing off on him, but not expecting that Gwendolyn ‘Most Competitive Person on Earth’ Tennyson wouldn’t agree to go along with it. Seriously Ben, you have met her before, right?

Fang is intense.

Kevin agrees that Gwen is fucking savage. Also he’s already done with Ben.

Ben, certain Kevin is up to something. Kevin, giving no shits whether Ben plays or not, he is having himself some laser tag.

Ben straight up saying he sometimes forgets Kev’s a kid too because he fights so many adults with no lives everything sorta blurs together. Also referring to Kevin as the only one who actually gives him a challenge. Offering a truce between ‘the strongest and second strongest dudes’.

It’s a truce. And Kevin is immediately taking charge.

An intense competition. That is only more intense because Fang is there and just, the most intense.

The game starts and immediately Kevin wants to ditch Ben for being an easy target.

Kevin abandons Ben to his fate and goes Quadsmack to better his odds.

Ben do not throw fireballs at the competition.

Also some girls dressed as Lucky Girl. Cute.

Ben taking shots at Kevin because clearly Kevin is being evil (like Ben hasn’t done this exact same shit) and then being surprised to be reminded that hey, moron, same team, you are losing yourself points.

“Which do you hate more, me or losing.” Do you really want the answer Kevin?

Holy crap, Fang brought a fucking arsenal and Gwen is living for it!

Welp, getting hit with a laser mucked up Kev’s watch. Can’t change back while it’s janky.

Also Ben he did his best building it, it’s complex tech. The fact it works at all is amazing, and with modifications. Plus, this by default is the testing phase.

Kevin is just having a day.

Gwen and Fang are just, owning everything. These boys are doomed.

Four Arms & Quad Smack team-up.

Ben is awful at math and Kevin cannot believe how awful at math.

Ben runnign off just as he and Kevin are winning for the sake of trying to take Gwen out. Kevin is not fucking having it and will not lose because of this boy.

Gwen has fucked up the leaderboard with a laser gun. Seriously, I can’t even blame the Antitrix problems on Kev this episode she’s been packing heat.

Kevin taking a blow from Gwen for Ben. These fucking extra-ass children.

Ooo, Antitrix took the blow, fixing the problem, at least in the short term. Kevin’s gonna have to make some adjustments, me thinks, but he’s a smart boy he’ll figure it out. Probably tinkers with the thing constantly anyway.

The melodrama

Ben, cradling Kevin in his arms and lamenting that he didn’t get to be the one having such an epic moment.

“Ben, chill, I just needed Gwen to shoot my Omnitrix again so I can glitch back to normal.” He’s a smart boy.

“What are you two even doing?” “I’m not doing anything, I woke up to this!” Poor Kevin.

Gwendolyn ‘Competition’ Tennyson, claiming it doesn’t matter who won right up until the score board is fixed and it turns out she and Fang did. By one point. Kevin and Ben got second place.

Fang is the janitor. He is wasted on that.

Kevin: Gwen was the most intense fight I’ve ever had, maybe she should be my nemesis. Ben: *gasp* The betrayal! You can’t drop me for her! Kevin: We’ll see. Give me a real challenge next time and maybe I won’t. Ben: *faces another internal crisis*

11/11

[legaciesmade]

maxence danet-fauvel. he/him. cismale. ╱ i thought i saw mathieu beaumont getting questioned by the police. the twenty-three year old is in their fourth year at west bridge studying business. they were at manon’s party because he’s her older brother and it was at their house. do you think they had something to do with her death? + a beguiling smile, a collection of luxury watches, the sound of running shoes on the track field.

hey you demon fucks .. i’m bailey !! i’m twenty-two, i go by she/her pronouns and i live in the b(est) timezone ;) if you wanna know more ab me, i’m a video game heaux and a pisces sun/aquarius moon/cancer rising ( for any fellow astro-hoes. ) also i’m not gonna lie, you’ll find me more readily on d.scord compared to t.mblr ims bcos... it’s easier, so hmu for tht if interested. anyw, mat is....certainly a new muse to me so i’m kinda just going with the flow. but what i do know is he’s fuckin trash. go figure.

his pinterest

the eldest child of the beaumont family; mathieu was basically groomed to one day take over the family business. it didn’t matter if he didn’t want it, he was the eldest and that was that.

so here he is, majoring in business ( with a bunch of math/finance courses on the side ) like a Good Son

literally he’s been taking classes to prepare him for college ever since the start of high school, maybe even earlier than that. because it’s a Very Serious Responsibility

to say he was envious that manon got to choose her own major/path in life is an understatement, but he’s learned well to hide his anger behind a smile,,,, thts so sad alexa play despacito

i’m leaving a lot of family stuff sorta open-ended bc i don’t want to assume too much ab manon aside from what we know thus far sjdhsjdh BUT JUST KNOW THAT, YEAH, MAT LOVES HIS FAMILY BUT....sometimes love isn’t enough. especially when you have like, basically NO say in a lot of aspects of your life...

his sport is literally the only thing that’s 100% his. his father would’ve probably preferred him to go out for football but... nah fam, boy wanted to do track and he’s crazy good. been doing it since middle school and each time he’s made captain position. dad still isn’t that impressed though.

that all being said. he’s also in student council; he enjoys it enough, but this was definitely more of a “you have to join it” scenario lol oops

his birthday is january 18th ( it must’ve been suuuuuuch a fun birthday this year, huh ;))))) i’m not sorry )

sun - capricorn ( restrictions, order, and control. you exercise these characteristics firstly on your own self. you like to control your reality by setting daily patterns to follow, and will frequently choose to wake up earlier than needed. you usually are stubborn and determined, and will frequently enter power games. however, you can be very patient. when this is combined with your determination and self-discipline, you can each any goal you set your mind to. )

moon - capricorn ( you show a lot of initiative. you are in it to win it. in fact, you might have a hard time kicking back and taking it easy. you do not want to feed into another’s beliefs about victimhood. you might experience issues of emotional detachment from other individuals, but this can prove very helpful; you can excel in things that require cold blood and seriousness. )

ascendant - aries ( you are athletic and active, highly energetic and capable of physical work. you are always ready to take initiative. self-reliance is learnt early in childhood. though you often have difficulties with your parents, especially the parent of the same sex. )

basically... his double capricorn aka his sense of maturity and seriousness, point to a very dutiful and hardworking nature... but, it also means that he had a lot of circumstances that forced him to grow up FAST. which, um, he did,,, in a sense. *points to his parents/his dad* we can blame them/him. HOWEVER, his aries rising/ascendant makes all that seriousness/logic tense af bc aries is like action/action/action... automatic response without thinking it through. so. that’s fun!!

alright so. the party and the pact. hm. mat’s in a very sticky situation with this whole thing and he still isn’t exactly sure how he feels ab it....but what’s done is done and there’s no going back now. of course he’s grieving in his own way, manon was still his little sister, but whew! seeing her like that really made him think of all the times they clashed/fought? like... yeah siblings fight okay but their different personalities/the clear difference in how their parents treated them, there was always a boiling point. no matter how quiet his negative emotions were, they were still there. sweet, naive manon... probably had no idea mathieu felt like this, because he just never fuckin talked ab it. and honestly, why would he?

in terms of what’s happening plot wise with the texts, etc, mat isn’t... okay he’s BOTHERED by them, but is he gonna let it show.... no. the fuck kinda question is tht...... he has enough to worry ab as is, keeping up with his courses and track and student council, not to mention his family and being the grieving brother,,, now someone’s sayin they KNOW what he helped do???? bye it’s not funny and he’s already exhausted. he’s v skeptical ab a lot of ppl in this so-called pact....but he knows most of them wouldn’t be out here tattling surely, when it’ll impact them just as much. *thinking emoji*

alright so idk what else to write atm like this is....Bad but. i tried okskjsk bye

[coconut-cluster]

In a Tizzy: Part One

part 2

Ok so Imma go ahead and post this first part - this is about 2/3 of what I have done right now, and THAT’S about half the fic (I’m not gonna do that math); this is sorta-mostly(-i’m-trying) based off this cool darn post right here 

edit: (i forgot to tag people whoops) @peachy-pattoncake is the wonderful prompt op! and also @existentialburden i forgot to tag you for the taglist, i done bamboozled myself (there is a new taglist for part two+ whenever I get around to posting them!)

anywho this is probably subject to change bc i’m not sure how I feel about it quite yet??? but there is more in the works so i guess we’ll see what happens

  Thomas’s deadlines always affected the Sides.

 Not directly, of course - certainly not in the way their rooms affected each other - but they were all sent into overdrive, sometimes working day and night as recording and editing and posting all approached. They all tried to contribute their most to get the video out on time (for once). Admittedly, some contributed more than others, which was exactly why Logan had been up since five thirty that morning on the dot, pencils, paper, and a breakfast bar (he always had a few in his top desk drawer) prepared the night before and laid neatly across his desk. He was ready to set to work at five thirty-five.

He’d already drafted a practical budget for the video, written, cleared, checked, and double-checked Thomas’s schedule to make room for recording, and made a list of possible background music - separated by genre, of course - by the time the sun spilled into his room and onto his desktop nearly an hour later. Flexing his hand, he glanced out into the Mindscape beyond, and allowed himself a sweet second to admire the warm weather after a week of rain - Thomas didn’t get out enough on his own, Lord knew he didn’t need a reason to; sunlight danced on the windowpane, reflecting off Logan’s Newton’s cradle and the small glass turtle Patton had given him two Christmases ago, casting a sea-green glow across his carpeted floor. He cherished these moments in the morning; the hour or two of quiet before the other Sides and even Thomas himself woke and began their… eccentric daily go-abouts, the moments of peace when he could just stare out windows without having to worry about reining in their daydreams or smoothing their worries in his own (admittedly blunt) fashion.

 A crash sounded from below him.

 Well, there went his peace.

 Logan turned back and looked over his papers, straightening them with a sigh; he could do no more until they established a pitch for the video. There was no other beneficial choice but to head downstairs and investigate the noise, no doubt another plate to be replaced in the constantly-emptying cabinet. He gathered the papers into a folder before smoothing his shirt, moving towards the stairs with as blank a face as he could manage in his preemptive exasperation.

  He was only slightly surprised to see Roman behind the counter, grumbling quietly to himself as he swept something off the ground, his red sash askew across his chest. His head snapped up as Logan cleared his throat.

  Roman’s eyes were bloodshot and underlined in lilac half moons, his bangs feathery as they fell into his face; his outfit was wrinkled in far more places than the prince would ever consciously allow (in front of the others, anyway). He raised his eyebrows and straightened with a cough. “Logan, good morning! What can I help you with?”

  “I heard a crash,” Logan stated, leaning slightly to look over the side of the counter - sure enough, shards littered the ground by Roman’s feet. “Ah.”

  “I was just cleaning it up,” Roman said, nudging the nearest piece with the tip of his boot, a frown printed across his face.

  “Yes, I gathered.” He watched with pursed lips as Roman fumbled for the broom a foot away. “Roman, did you sleep last night?”

  Roman paused. “...Yes?”

  Logan pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut - how many times did he stress the importance of a steady sleep pattern? He couldn’t imagine it to be that difficult to follow a simple schedule. “Roman, you know it’s important for Thomas’s health that we get enough sleep.” Roman didn’t answer, just kept sweeping at the forlorn plate shards scattered across the tile floor. “What exactly, might I ask, were you doing that you prioritized over your basic needs?”

  “Oh!” Roman dropped the broom with a crash that echoed uncomfortably in Logan’s ears; the fanciful side quite literally leapt to the table, mumbling incoherent cheers as he shuffled through a stack of papers before pulling one out with a dramatic swipe of his arm through the air, a sparkling smile gracing his face. “For the video!” He handed it to Logan and went back to sweeping, but his eyes flickered up every few seconds to watch him read it.

  Logan picked through the pitch - it detailed an exploration of Disney history, or rather, their original stories, and suggested a comparison of the two using visuals via Roman. It seemed to parallel Roman and Virgil’s brief discussion over the subject from a number of videos ago, but this pitch included Patton and Logan, to ‘provide factual support and light humor to the origins of the tales’. Roman noted it as a fun filler video, but Logan had to admit, he was impressed with the detail of the concept.

  He straightened his glasses. “This is quite exceptional, Roman. Well done.” His eyes skimmed over the text again, pausing when the room remained silent. He glanced up.

  Roman was staring directly at him, his mouth open the slightest bit as he regarded the logical side with blatant shock. After a moment of his gaze traveling between Logan and the pitch, he uttered a choked, “...What?”

  “I said well done,” Logan repeated slowly, lifting the paper for clarification. “It’s an interesting idea, one that I am sure both Thomas and the viewers will enjoy.”

  Roman continued staring; he looked doubtful, but his cheeks were dusted in light pink. “R-really? You like it?”

  “Well, it’s certainly not bad by any means.” Logan simpered to himself. “I do rather enjoy historical pursuits.”

  “Oh,” Roman said simply, glancing at the page as if he’d never seen it. “That’s- good, that’s very- if you’ll excuse me,” he said quickly, grabbing the remaining papers spread across the tabletop and all but running out of the room and up the stairs.

 “You-” Logan watched him disappear to the second floor. “Well then.” How curious; Roman rarely passed up an opportunity to gloat - much to Logan’s chagrin - so why the odd reaction? Logan glanced between the paper and the stairs, his mind whirring.

  Well, he had some spare time before he went back to work on the video plans, and he supposed it wouldn’t hurt to brush up on some of Thomas’s scientific skills-

 “VIRGIL!”

  The anxious side fell off his bed with a shriek as Logan burst through the door to his room; he peeked over the edge a moment later, bangs covering his eyes. “What?!”

  “I need your help with an experiment immediately.”

  Virgil’s eyes went wide and he sunk farther behind the bed, glancing wildly at the door as Logan closed it behind him. “If this is anything like last summer, I don’t want anything to do with it-”

  “No, no,” Logan insisted, waving a hand through the air to shoo the statement away, “that was a fluke - it won’t happen again, don’t worry. No, I need your help with what should be a rather simple investigation.”

  Virgil watched him, his gaze wary. “What is it?”

  “I need you to compliment Roman.”

  Virgil froze, shooting Logan a quizzical glance; he looked ready to laugh with a tiny, disbelieving smile pulling at his lips, but his face fell when Logan simply raised an eyebrow. “Are you serious?”

  “Always am. Necktie.”

  “No!” Virgil swiped his hair out of his face and crawled back onto his bed. “Not gonna happen, Lo-”

  “Why not?”

  “Because it’s Princey?” He raised his eyebrows as if the answer should have been obvious. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but he kind of hates me.”

  “I beg to differ,” Logan said, crossing his arms. Virgil’s mouth snapped shut. “He seems to enjoy your- eh, banter quite a bit, from what I’ve observed. Have you ever considered he’s simply keeping up an act? He is the performer, after all.”

  Virgil went quiet. “What have you observed?”

  “The details aren’t important-”

  “I’m not doing anything until you tell me,” Virgil snapped. His eyes flicked to Logan’s smug smile and he hunched his shoulders, curling in on himself. “I just wanna know, not-” He sighed and rubbed his eyes; his purple eyeshadow didn’t appear to smudge at all. “Nevermind. Why am I doing this, exactly?"

  “I’m… curious.”

  Virgil pulled his hands away from his face, his expression deadpan. “That’s it? I’m risking my dignity because you have a question?”

  “All of science is just ‘having a question’, Virgil - and I assure you, you’re not risking anything, dignity or otherwise.”

  “Why don’t you just make Patton do it? He’s better at all the- smiley stuff.”

  Logan resisted the urge to pull at his hair - patience, Logan, patience is key - instead taking a deep breath and straightening his back. “I will, in due time, but I need different variables; there may be multiple outcomes the tests, and I must explore all aspects of the experiment to get the most accurate conclusion.”

  Virgil narrowed his eyes. “What do I get out of it?”

  “Well, you’ll get the satisfaction of seeing Roman’s reaction, should my hypothesis prove correct.” Virgil raised an unimpressed eyebrow. “I’ll also relieve you of your obligation to attend Family Game night for the next three weeks.”

  Virgil chewed on his lip before offering Logan a reluctant glance. “Make it four.”

  “Deal.”

[fliipclaw]

session recap 4 - calling caligula

we did another d&d session yesterday and it was. a lot of fun. here’s a list of things that happened and things people said in a roughly chronological order. i’ve already done three of these, i’m sure you guys know the drill by now.

the session opens with reeliel and tarrik in the infirmary

“everything about that is just a paradox. the infirmary of the death arena”

[the game is interrupted by a phone call]

“tarrik, shut up, don’t make it worse!” “i’m already half dead, how much worse could it get?” “you could be fully dead”

this time we’re doing double battles

galle and grelynn are paired up against an ogre

“it’s been so long we’ve forgotten how to play d&d”

“so that’s 9 damage…. he hits you really hard”

“so you rolled a three” “[dejected] yeah” “you just fall over”

“we bonded! by… tripping over ourselves for a turn!”

“there are two more fights, and then hopefully, no more fights!”

galle trips a dude just for fun

“i just wanna be a dick sometimes, ‘kay?”

pluto is teamed up with ilah (an npc based on an oc)

“kill her” “noOO!”

“i already killed her once i can’t kill her again. bany might actually murder me” “i would”

“has his eye been healed?” “no, he’s still blind” “he’s not all of a sudden going to become not blind”

“you stabbed him like FOUR TIMES in the eye”

“it’s just a little bit scratched” “a LITTLE BIT?”

“he needs a bit of tlc, okay?” “he needs a new fucking eye!”

“thoth didn’t look very friendly at first, but look at him now. blind and my best friend”

“is the monster just watching this?” “yeah, it’s last in initiative order and talking is a free action”

[talking about the squirrel that my family has been feeding] bany: we have a possum that lives in the bushes outside

ilah and pluto are the worst duo in that they will maim creatures and then befriend them

“maybe pluto just makes everyone blind by default?” “maybe that’s why pluto’s so terrible as a rogue but manages to steal from everyone anyway”

bany sighs a lot during this scene it’s great

i admit to my shameless rigging of the game when my players are doing terribly

pluto: decides to befriend the monster / the party: do you want to use up your second friend slot??

“what is the creature doing right now?” “it’s probably bleeding” “but how’s it feeling?” “it’s feeling pretty bad”

ilah: befriends the creature / matt: we’re playing d&d with the fucking rspca

“this is the death arena, not the befriend the creatures that attack you arena” “it’s actually a petting zoo”

“what kind of monster are they fighting?” “it’s called an ettercap. it looks like…… i don’t even know how to describe it”

“that’s the plot of lord of the flies, pluto befriends an ettercap”

tarrik and reeliel, our resident failures, are paired up against a gargoyle

my rolls are always really terrible. it’s the d&d gods punishing me for not using physical dice.

reeliel runs up to tarrik, jumps up on and off his shoulders, and up into the air

she unfortunately misses her attack

reeliel casts thunderwave. tarrik is understandably pissed.

“hey matt, what’s your constitution like?” “not negative” “go ahead and roll then!”

there are a lot of pauses where i stop to do maths. i’m the epitome of that ‘when you’re gay and can’t calculate the tip’ video.

“you two actually did something competent for once!” “the two weakest members of the team!"

“as it turns out, everyone else was just holding us two back. that’s what it is” “are you sure?”

mikael poofs around this time. rip them.

the immediate response to being taken outside the arena is of course “making our way downtown"

bany: this sounds like a public execution / me: carries on explaining the scene

“notice how they ignored the question"

i discovered that i can’t talk and type at the same time

neriona: is there / tarrik: is flipping her off with both hands

“matt matt matt matt matt matthew. shut up”

there is an elf reclining on a chaise lounge eating grapes. tarrik drinks his wine.

“the bulla felix, come in, come in!” “oh fuck”

ilah and galle: sit down normally

tarrik: lies down and hogs an entire seat

reeliel: sits like L

cai: poofs / me: should we just carry on? / matt: i’m liking this shouting idea / bany: oh god

[the game is interrupted by a toddler]

“jax, don’t do that with your eye!”

“greetings, i am the emperor of this fine city, petpetor!” “what? your name is what?” “petpetor!” “petpetu?” “petpetor!”

[toddler noises] “cai, are you murdering a child?” “it sounds more like the child is murdering cai”

matt made a child cry in church one time just by looking at them

“go find auntie billie! take this!” “it’s not safe to go alone, take this!”

[the game is once again interrupted by a toddler]

“if that was me there would be children flying from the rooftop” “and that’s why it isn’t you”

are you stronger than a 2 year old? for cai, the answer is no!

“cai, are you made of noodles or something?” “yes”

god i’m just now listening to this character voice and it’s awful

petpetor asks them to investigate an assassination plot and find his would-be assassin

tarrik tries to wind him up and reeliel throws something at him from across the room

“i am prepared to stab this guy in the back just so you know”

“what’s in it for us?” “freedom from the death arena” “yeah okay we’ll do it”

“i want immunity for the rest of my squad" “if you stop robbing my friends, than yes” “can we rob your enemies?"

“he takes like the bowl of grapes off the table and shoves them in his mouth”

galle: idk who you people are but i’m good with not being trapped in a death arena

tarrik’s metric for liking people: the quality of their wine

the party has a private discussion and decides to investigate and then stab petpetor in the back

“regardless of whether or not neriona is actually the one behind this assassination, i say we frame her"

“do we have anyone who’s alignment is good on this team?"

“i think we will give tarrik free reign to rob the palace as long as we can also rob the palace”

“so far his suspect list is like half of the entire city”

everyone complimenting the write ups and i’m sorry this one is mostly quotes. not much action happened but we did have a lot of fun conversations.

“after the endgame, after we kill not caligula, what’s going to happen?” “don’t you worry about that”

“am i on reasonable terms with the party now?” “you’re getting there with me” “welllll…." “tarrik shut up, we don’t need anymore foes”

“i have 300 buried and 50 in a pair of dark pants on the edge of a road”

“bye!” “i’m glad we’re sorta friends now!” “well, kinda, not really"