#i have accidentally insulted so many people and i would be *genuinely* sorry

[uncanny-tranny]

I don't think it really sinks in just how devastating social development/social understanding deficits can be, especially growing up in formative years.

I was the type of autistic who genuinely didn't know the things I said were or may be insulting to others until it was too late and the worst part was I wasn't being malicious. But because my statements, observations, or jokes were taken as malicious, nobody thought to direct me about what is socially acceptable. Instead, I was socially isolated, making the issue worse because I never learned. I don't fault others for this, but social isolation because of differences in neurotypes absolutely affects your development, I think. It hasn't been until pretty recent that I started to actually be able to have the foresight to know that my intentions aren't clear to others the way that they are clear to me. In fact, my socializing has swung the other way where I am too restricted and paranoid.

I absolutely understand that I lived in a time where different neurotypes were not understood, and that because nobody understood, you were seen as maliciously non-compliant with social cues and roles. I don't blame the people around me who didn't know, but what I am trying to say is that I just wish we weren't so quick to socially isolate the "freaks" and "weirdos" and "non-compliant" people. Humans are social creatures, and honestly, it's a very drastic punishment that often makes the behaviours worse.

[heartsoji]

kenma + cuddles + stormy weather + only one bed

a/n: writing more comfort for myself bc there have been too many thunderstorms i hate this someone move me to antartica with the penguins and no thunder ALSO sorry if the grammar is wrong or smth i didn't proofread lol

you sighed.

"this sucks."

kuroo, the outdoorsy one of the group, decided that it would be fun to go camping. however, knowing that the two of you preferred the indoors and hated bugs, he decided to rent a cabin. (which was actually kinda sweet and considerate gj kuroo)

however, he made a little misclick and accidentally ordered a cabin with one bed. for the three of you.

so he called up the owners of the cabin and asked if they had any futons or anything, to which they told him to go buy himself a bed or a futon lol

so kuroo, being the prideful idiot he is, decided to drive AN HOUR AND A HALF back to civilization to buy 2 WHOLE ASS BEDS when it was 1am (nvm kuroo ur an idiot)

now, the two of you were stuck in a tiny little cabin that kuroo was going to jam TWO WHOLE BEDS in

tbh at this point u were ready to just SLEEP and kenma was literally melting onto the floor

buuuut there was only one bed and the two of you were too scared to sleep on it bc ur both v observant people and noticed that the other looked dead

so after these like rly awkward 15 minutes where there was no talking and no sound, you both sat on the couch (that literally felt like cardboard wtf kuroo) and you watched kenma play games on his game boy bc there was NO SERVICE and also you genuinely enjoy watching him play games bc he has the CUTEST EXPRESSIONS when he plays games

however, at some point, it started raining and you two got a text from kuroo

from 'rooster' to you and 'kenma':

The rain back here is rly bad so I have to wait it out. Be back tmrw :)

the two of you decided to suck it up after joking around and insulting him for a good 5 minutes (were ugs rly joking ?) and grabbed a blanket and sat back down on the cardboard couch.

you liked the rain. it was nice that there was more sound in the cabin that just the sound of buttons being rapidly pressed.

however, at some point, the rain turned into a thunderstorm.

you were terrified, to say the least. thunder has always been one of your absolute worst fears.

however, you didn't want to make a scene. especially not in front of your crush.

but ofc kenma being the observant man he is, noticed that you were gripping onto his shoulder a little tighter, and that you slightly tensed up whenever the thunder in the background roared. (for context you were holding onto his shoulder to see his game)

when he eventually came to the conclusion that you were terrified of thunder, he wasn't really sure what to do. comfort you? turn off his game? have you go to sleep? play some music? like what was he supposed to do

lucky for him, you figure out what he has to do for him. when a particularly loud and boomy thunder (they're all loud and boomy but this one was VERY loud and boomy) roars, you instinctively curl yourself close to him, eyes shut in terror.

he knows what to do now.

he turns off his game boy, sets it aside, and gently holds you close as he rubs your back.

"it's ok." he whispers soothingly. "it's all ok."

you're veryslightly embarrassed by the fact that you're literally curled up with your crush right now, but you don't really have time to think about the embarrassment with the thunder in the background

however, he provides you the sweetest comfort (contrary to my thunder comfort hcs lmao) and just wordlessly rubs your back and runs his fingers through your hair (bc he knows how good it feels lol)

his comfort is so nice that you end up falling asleep curled into him.

after your breathing steadies and he knows you're asleep, he lets his emotions show a bit more. the stupid smile that he's been biting back unleashes itself and finds its way onto his features. he gazes down at your sleeping figure, all curled up and snuggling into his chest, and feels his cheeks heat up a little. he lets himself drift of to sleep too.

you both end up waking up bc the couch is hard as cardboard about an hour later. he sighs and offers you the bed but you refuse immediately. the couch was uncomfortable af, the floor was worse and you were not about to let him sleep on it.

however, the same went for him. it would appear that both of you were incredibly stubborn.

kenma was the one to propose the "how about we both sleep on the bed? it's a queen so there'll be enough room.."

he may look calm and cool as ever when saying this, but if you look at his ears, they're bright red.

you nervously agree, and the two of you slowly climb into the bed.

the bed wasn't super comfortable, but it was much better than the couch. you slowly drift off to sleep.

you and kenma were both woken up at the same time by a rooster (not kuroo, an actual rooster) cock-a-doodle-doo-ing. when you opened your eyes, you were met with kenma's face about two inches from yours.

"AH!" you both screamed and tried to jump away, but couldn't. you looked down and realized that the two of you had intertwined legs and hands at night in your sleep.

to say the least, you were embarrassed. you could feel your cheeks burning up, and you saw kenma's ears turn bright red.

"uhm.." kenma started. "i.."

"I'M BACK!! D'YA MISS ME?" kuroo (the actual one, not his twin who woke u up)

you both whipped ur heads around and tried to untangle yourselves before he saw, but it was too late.

"oya?" (I NEVER PUT ANYTHING DOWN IN JAPANESE BUT IT JUST FELT SO APPROPRIATE) he had the biggest smirk on his face.

"ding a ling ling! whoa look at that i have a call be right back~!"

that cheeky brat.

"so, um, kenma.." you started, not really knowing what to say.

he cut you off. "how about we have this conversation after the trip is over?"

"yeah. lets do that."

the rest of the trip was actually decently fun, especially knowing that your crush liked you back and that you could look forward to that conversation after it was over. and as much as you hated to admit it, it was all thanks to kuroo and his idiotic brain.

[psalacanthea]

Dissonance and Debauchery: The Drama of an Ill-Fated Bard- Chapter 20

New chapter in the Astarion x Tav fic! In which Zynatheri has a bad case of the morbs, and Astarion happily plays the devil on her shoulder. Sometimes you don't need to be cheered up. Sometimes you just need to be sad as indulgently as possible.

...

Zyn took one last look at the night sky,  eyes scanning the glittering lights that rippled across the canvas of darkness.  A beautiful vista.  So vast and mysterious, full of worlds and wonders never beheld by the ignorant creatures of Toril.  Somewhere, out among those pinprick lights that chased the moon across the teeming sky, where spelljammers and astral ships moored, githyanki were fucking.

Just up there in the sky somewhere, going at it, all snarling and writhing, insulting each other.  They wouldn’t just have sex, though, it would be a fight for dominance.  Claws and teeth and maybe some insults. Dick-biting. If you–

Wyll’s abrupt, coughing laugh interrupted her mental tangent, Zyn’s head whipping around as he bent forward.  Utterly lost, she stared at him, surprised by the vehemence of his laughter. She usually knew when she’d made a joke.  

Zyn was actually very good at them, but, “what did I say?”

“I’ve…never felt your mind before,” Wyll admitted, straightening up with a broad grin still on his face.  “That was beautiful…until the last bit there, obviously.  Truly, to be in the mind of a bard is a lyrical experience.”

Oh gods.

Feeling violated, but tamping it down because she didn’t know why she’d done that, Zyn stared at Wyll in fear.  This was her fault, and she’d done it.  She tried to push back the dismay quickly, glancing away, but she knew he’d seen it.

“I'm not upset with you, I just don't like that.”

“Haven’t you figured out how to do it on purpose by now?  I apologize.  If I’d known it was accidental I wouldn’t have said anything.”

Shit.  She’d just been ignoring it, erasing it from the narrative because it made her so profoundly uncomfortable, but she couldn’t any more.  They were in each other’s heads.

The sheer violation of it made her skin crawl.

Zyn needed to know how bad it was.  “You all mentioned it…happening before, like it was normal.  But eventually you stopped talking about it, and…well, it’s only happened to me once, with Lae’zel, and it scared the shit out of me.  You really do it all the time?”

“On purpose?  Some of us more than others.  It can be useful,”  Wyll said, red eye peering down at her as he tilted his head.  “I’d  assumed you had stronger walls ‘round your mind than the rest of us.”

“I do.  I don’t like things in my head,” she said, grimacing.  “When you play tricks on other people you don’t want them to be played on you!” And she knew people who scried, of course.  And read minds.  Gods, if only she could afford an anti-scrying amulet– well, maybe this unwanted venture would yield some benefits.

If she didn’t die.

“Well, I hope that I didn’t make you uncomfortable, and it was nice to see you open up a little.”

Zyn stared at him in frank disbelief.

Wyll's eyes crinkled as he turned to face her, leaning down a little.  “What?”

“How are you this good in so many ways?  Aren’t you exhausted?  I would be!  I accidentally think…and sorry by the way, for that mental image of Lae’zel and that Voss person having sex.”

Wyll folded his arms.  “Why was that your choice, I wonder?”

“I don’t know a lot of githyanki?” she replied, shrugging at his understanding nod.  “But seriously, what is wrong with you?  Genuinely.  It has to be something really bad.  Like eating babies.”

“Are you lobbing accusations at Gale’s cooking?"

[wolfisland]

also basically what happened with this dude, because id actually rather be candid about it because i fucked up, and thats not something i wanna hide either. i did fuck up. intensely. if you're familiar with me and previous urls (specifically bìfēy) you may have actually witnessed this

so timeline:

- ive known this dude (went by catboyfleas at the time i believe) since i was 13, which i consider childhood for me as someone who Does Not Remember Their Childhood. we'd had an on and off friendship because he's incredibly abrasive and rude and overall the reviews from anyone whos met him that i still speak to are generally "hes a cunt", and id been pretty vulnerable to this treatment growing up

- roughly 2020-2021 (????) i criticise a person (jen truëfaggōt) who, as far as i was and am aware, is not and was not bisexual and had no right trying to coin flags for a bisexualgender flag in my personal opinion when there were already flags made by bisexuals, especially when this person had a history of biphobia

- he accidentally misgenders this person by using "king" when telling her to stay in her lane, as said person used he/him at the time and identified as gay for men, though also tma. we were not aware that this would go under misgendering as we thought it was the correct gendered term

- this person is very upset which is fair and accuses him of misgendering, and of fucking course instead of apologising he doubles down on the "well i didnt know!" and im working to try and translate dipshit speak into an actual explanation for his actions, as this person accuses him of intentional misgendering which it genuinely wasnt. i cannot stand this dude anymore, and i will throw him under the bus for a myriad of reasons now that hes no longer around to essentially mock and gaslight me for sport. but he didnt do this intentionally.

however the lack of apology is in itself transmisogynistic and me trying to apologise for him and explain things is still transmisogynistic and didnt fix it. i am genuinely and deeply sorry for this. at the time i wanted to explain on behalf of my friend, who for the better part of 10 years id been constantly insulted by and belittled and had to essentially be a pr agent of in many circumstances, and i felt that as i'd been the one to initially interact with that person, it was my responsibility to try and fix the situation. we are no longer and will never be friends again.

it was not my role to apologise for him or explain his actions, and i should have cut him off as people suggested. i was pretty strongly attached to him due to him being one of the only people whod stayed part of my life and defended me when i was being abused by my parents and partners, and i felt i owed it to him to try and fix this. i didnt really have anyone else i knew irl, and i truly did not think he had poor intentions, but actions do speak louder and continuing to make excuses for him contributed to the damage he'd already done.

- the situation later devolves into all of the attention and blame being shifted onto me, as he just logged out essentially after continuing to double down on how he never meant it as misgendering as he couldnt have known - iirc he claimed he wasnt even aware you could be tma and still be mlm in any capacity.

i end up being held accountable for his actions, and i believe this person actually at a point called me a dog? like a lot of it was very very peppered with antiblackness and bimisogyny — something she ALSO had a history of, and i will not back down on that, there was definitely warranted criticism for my actions, but i was treated with far more hostility and bad faith than he was, and after not long at all i was the sole target of criticism (rather than him) until a callout was later posted for the person, revealing she wasnt even transfem, and proving she'd been racefaking as well.

however that callout also ended up being filled with absolute baseless BULLSHIT theorising about other completely uninvolved people being sock puppets of her, and this actively harmed those people. the authors of that callout never apologised and disappeared and i do not associate with them nor do i condone the flimsy and dangerous accusations levelled against uninvolved people.

i did not write the callout but my testimony was involved, and i actively condemn the majority of the callout. it hurt others. i didnt want to hurt other people like that, i cant imagine how much stress they were under after those false accusations of being someone else entirely, and i am so sorry that they were dragged into this and subjected to that.

i wanted that person held accountable for her antiblackness and bimisogyny, as there genuinely is not an excuse for that, i didnt deserve that either. i absolutely deserved criticism for my behaviour and responses and i deserved to be held accountable and still do, but there wasnt an excuse to talk about me like i was some purposefully evil animal and the instigator of all of this and that i was aggressive and cruel. i wasnt. that was never my intention. ever.

i regret not nipping that in the bud and im genuinely sorry for my part in it. i should have listened when warned to cut him off and i should have never tried to speak on his behalf or apologise for it. i kept poor company and thats on me. i believe i have genuinely learned from this and i am remorseful for it, but i also understand anyones skepticism around my intentions or actions. everyone is entitled to that. just because im apologising doesnt mean im entitled to anyones forgiveness, especially not like... tma peoples? but the apology is still important to me. i am sorry. i do regret this. i will do better.

i have worked very hard to do better and Be better and i do hope that reflects. i care a lot about this topic and especially as a black bi woman. its important to me that i work to make sure people feel safe around me.

so. for anyone who was NOT aware of this and has no interest in associating with me further after learning it, i fully understand.

and if you were involved with this and have stumbled across this and were one of the people harmed by it, i am genuinely sorry. id considered reaching out to certain people affected directly but its been made very clear that these people do not want to hear from me or anyone else who'd been even tangentially involved in the callout and ive chosen to respect the right to peace and privacy. but please understand that if given the chance i would like to directly apologise, provided it wouldnt cause further distress.

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

[TW: Manipulation, Bullying(?), Light Mentions of Physical Abuse, and possibly more, i genuinely dont know how to tw this sorry]

Hi, call me Shadow. Im looking for some advice on how to move on from the situation below, some reassurance, or atleast someone to listen to me without judgment. Sorry for any grammer/spelling mistakes

They're alot of parentheses, extra notes, and run on sentences so apologizes for length

About 6ish month ago, i cut off a very toxic friend. Said friend, lets call them A, would offen make fun of and tease everyone in our friend group 'to show love' and such. Which is fine, some people are okay with that but personally im not as ive dealt with many toxic friends who've hurt me by using that as a cover up.

A was an irl friend of three people in our group's server that was invited on really late, i was pretty guarded and afraid around them for awhile, both because of a new person and because i had a feeling some was off with them. I ignored it, thinking i was just being overprotective and overthinking things again. After a few months things settled and it seem they fit in almost perfectly, till suddenly their jokes started getting really targeted and mean.

They started targeted me and one of my partners, constantly making cruel 'jokes' about us, everything from "if you're on [name]/[name]'s team [insert bad thing] will happen to you" to jokes that were just insults played off as jokes. I tried multiple times to ask them to stop but they played the "its just a joke" everytime

It got the point they started holding my reactions over me, and even purposely making me upset to have something to use against me. The main incident i remember is them pretending to be mad at me while i was rambling and spent atleast 10mins pretending to type to make me anxious (they later admitted this to one of my friends who then told me), and when they finally sent their message which ended up being a joke related to what i was rambling, i in my moment of vulnerability due to rambling (rambling for me is like exposing my soul) and them scarring me, i accidentally admitted i was afraid i was gonna be yelled at

They then took to posting what i said in our quotes channel for everyone to see after i deleted my message. They refused to delete the message and even started deleting mine in response (they were a mod on our server), it took owner stepping in to fix this

A started using their mod powers to delete both of my partners' messages when they started speaking out against all three of our treatment. They also deleted our messages unrelated to that, making us look terrible in pass conversations.

When me i finally snapped and ledt the server, moving to another server hosted by a different friend that 90% of us were also one, they started messaging me for answers and to "apologize" aka blame me for what happened. They were nice and reasonable at first, but then they started pressuring me into in their words "cursing them out", which i unfortunately gave into.

A used it as an excuse to blame me for everything, blame me for never speaking up despite me constantly trying and being met with "its just a joke bro" they tried lying me about them using tone tags despite that fact they never used them. I blocked them quickly after that, seeing what they were doing but barely a day after they tried talking to one of my partners about it.

In the message A sent they tried to place all the blame on my other partner, saying that they deserve everything that happened. They said i shouldnt be absolutely pissed at them about what happened to my partner, what they (A) put them through. To say that was the final straw is an understatement.

A destroyed me and my partner's self worth and confidence, has made us even months later second guess our every word and even our friends. Afraid their gonna turn against and treat us like A did. A made me question my own judgment and stuff with their lies. They tried placing blame on me for unrelated things, they tried to ruin my image. And as we later found out A physical hurt one of the three people in our group they knew irl, often.

Im still constantly afraid of A finding their way back to the new server even tho they're blocked, ive had ex friends stalk me to almost creepshowart levels and i wouldn't put it past them to do that. Most of the process i made with my friends to open up and be myself more destroyed. I fear people talking behind my back again, cuz apparently A tried starting a secret server with my friends who were aware of what happened due to exams to trash talk me, which failed but still.

I still feel terrible about all this, i didnt speak out when A originally started trash talking my partner out of fear, now i feel bad for causing my friends to basically lose our originally server because of this. The guilt eats at me even tho i know this was the best choice for everyone

Tldr/summary cuz its long

An ex friend of mine would constantly bully me and one of my partners and when we finally stand up for ourselves they tried manipulating us and our other friends into making them the good guy and us the bad guys. Even going as far as trying to fake evidence (which ive learn as of writing this)

Even months after im still suffering the effects of everything and i dont know how to try moving on. I am trying to seek therapy again but the health system here is terrible and expensive, so im trying to possibly find ways to help myself while waiting

Hi Shadow,

I'm so sorry to hear about the toxic friendship you had. The way your friend treated you and your partner was completely unacceptable. Their behavior of making mean-spirited jokes, targeting and insulting both of you, and dismissing your requests to stop is not a sign of love or friendship. It's important to remember that you deserve respect, kindness, and support in your relationships.

It seems like A used their position as a mod to further their harmful actions. Deleting messages, manipulating situations, and attempting to shift blame are clear signs of their toxic behavior. It's unfortunate that they tried to undermine your self-worth and confidence, as well as create divisions among your friends. This kind of treatment can have lasting effects, but it's essential to recognize that their behavior is a reflection of their own issues and not a reflection of your worth.

Please know that healing is a gradual process, and it's okay to give yourself time and space to heal at your own pace. It's understandable to have moments of doubt or fear, but try to remind yourself that you have taken positive steps by cutting off a toxic relationship. You deserve peace and happiness in your life.

I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[bisluthq]

I had completely forgotten those were his teacher's exact words. So, sorry to Taylor but I think in this case I believe more his teacher's words cause I have no reason to believe he was biased and only saying that cause he wanted to leave with Matty Healy 😂🤷 //

This is an insane thing to say because I was good at technical drawing in school and my teacher said I could probably pursue something related to that but it doesn’t mean you can compare me to like actual architects? That same teacher also told me I did a really good job at picking a color palette for one project we did, and I can’t compare myself to artists who know about color theory. I was also really good at everything logic related but I can’t be compared to people who code? A teacher or a professor seeing potential in a certain area doesn’t mean that person can be compared to actual professionals? I hate Matty as much as the next person but this is wild

RIGHT!????? Like Joe’s always been a creative leaning guy but like Matty’s genuinely a fantastic songwriter and his prose is fucking exceptional too? He talks a huge amount of shit lol like out his mouth but when he sits down to write - and maybe this is also why he uses the typewriter to not get distracted by Internet stuff because he does write stupid stuff online all the time lol - he comes up with legitimately exceptional things. Obviously when compared to Joe Alwyn, who is an actor whose backup career degree wise would be teaching acting or secondary school English - Matty is actually a poet (and a writer)? Also I’m a huge fan of the folkmore WB songs (Sweet Nothing doesn’t really hit it for me) but when people were truthering alternate WBs, a few things I said repeatedly is the musical structure tends not to be that complicated and also the vibes are quite different to other Taylor songs in that Joe seems to lean to coming up with little scenarios in his head, like almost little short stories, and they’re quite cool but they’re generally not very profound. Like I love Champagne Problems and I personally believe he had a lot to do with that because he was like “but imagine a breakup where you can’t explain it, that’d be really sad” kind of vibe. That’s very different to Matty’s stuff, which regularly and quite profoundly comments on the world. I mean a lot are also silly, but usually intentionally so tbh like Matty doesn’t accidentally write silliness, he actually plays into that and makes jokes and shit. Not an insult to Joe, who isn’t a professional writer (whereas Matty is) or excusing all of Matty’s many fucking fuckups (which we don’t need to do to acknowledge that he’s a great writer).

[how-do-i-delete-this-acc]

kenma + cuddles + stormy weather + only one bed

a/n: writing more comfort for myself bc there have been too many thunderstorms i hate this someone move me to antartica with the penguins and no thunder ALSO sorry if the grammar is wrong or smth i didn't proofread lol

you sighed.

"this sucks."

kuroo, the outdoorsy one of the group, decided that it would be fun to go camping. however, knowing that the two of you preferred the indoors and hated bugs, he decided to rent a cabin. (which was actually kinda sweet and considerate gj kuroo)

however, he made a little misclick and accidentally ordered a cabin with one bed. for the three of you.

so he called up the owners of the cabin and asked if they had any futons or anything, to which they told him to go buy himself a bed or a futon lol

so kuroo, being the prideful idiot he is, decided to drive AN HOUR AND A HALF back to civilization to buy 2 WHOLE ASS BEDS when it was 1am (nvm kuroo ur an idiot)

now, the two of you were stuck in a tiny little cabin that kuroo was going to jam TWO WHOLE BEDS in

tbh at this point u were ready to just SLEEP and kenma was literally melting onto the floor

buuuut there was only one bed and the two of you were too scared to sleep on it bc ur both v observant people and noticed that the other looked dead

so after these like rly awkward 15 minutes where there was no talking and no sound, you both sat on the couch (that literally felt like cardboard wtf kuroo) and you watched kenma play games on his game boy bc there was NO SERVICE and also you genuinely enjoy watching him play games bc he has the CUTEST EXPRESSIONS when he plays games

however, at some point, it started raining and you two got a text from kuroo

from 'rooster' to you and 'kenma':

The rain back here is rly bad so I have to wait it out. Be back tmrw :)

the two of you decided to suck it up after joking around and insulting him for a good 5 minutes (were ugs rly joking ?) and grabbed a blanket and sat back down on the cardboard couch.

you liked the rain. it was nice that there was more sound in the cabin that just the sound of buttons being rapidly pressed.

however, at some point, the rain turned into a thunderstorm.

you were terrified, to say the least. thunder has always been one of your absolute worst fears.

however, you didn't want to make a scene. especially not in front of your crush.

but ofc kenma being the observant man he is, noticed that you were gripping onto his shoulder a little tighter, and that you slightly tensed up whenever the thunder in the background roared. (for context you were holding onto his shoulder to see his game)

when he eventually came to the conclusion that you were terrified of thunder, he wasn't really sure what to do. comfort you? turn off his game? have you go to sleep? play some music? like what was he supposed to do

lucky for him, you figure out what he has to do for him. when a particularly loud and boomy thunder (they're all loud and boomy but this one was VERY loud and boomy) roars, you instinctively curl yourself close to him, eyes shut in terror.

he knows what to do now.

he turns off his game boy, sets it aside, and gently holds you close as he rubs your back.

"it's ok." he whispers soothingly. "it's all ok."

you're veryslightly embarrassed by the fact that you're literally curled up with your crush right now, but you don't really have time to think about the embarrassment with the thunder in the background

however, he provides you the sweetest comfort (contrary to my thunder comfort hcs lmao) and just wordlessly rubs your back and runs his fingers through your hair (bc he knows how good it feels lol)

his comfort is so nice that you end up falling asleep curled into him.

after your breathing steadies and he knows you're asleep, he lets his emotions show a bit more. the stupid smile that he's been biting back unleashes itself and finds its way onto his features. he gazes down at your sleeping figure, all curled up and snuggling into his chest, and feels his cheeks heat up a little. he lets himself drift of to sleep too.

you both end up waking up bc the couch is hard as cardboard about an hour later. he sighs and offers you the bed but you refuse immediately. the couch was uncomfortable af, the floor was worse and you were not about to let him sleep on it.

however, the same went for him. it would appear that both of you were incredibly stubborn.

kenma was the one to propose the "how about we both sleep on the bed? it's a queen so there'll be enough room.."

he may look calm and cool as ever when saying this, but if you look at his ears, they're bright red.

you nervously agree, and the two of you slowly climb into the bed.

the bed wasn't super comfortable, but it was much better than the couch. you slowly drift off to sleep.

you and kenma were both woken up at the same time by a rooster (not kuroo, an actual rooster) cock-a-doodle-doo-ing. when you opened your eyes, you were met with kenma's face about two inches from yours.

"AH!" you both screamed and tried to jump away, but couldn't. you looked down and realized that the two of you had intertwined legs and hands at night in your sleep.

to say the least, you were embarrassed. you could feel your cheeks burning up, and you saw kenma's ears turn bright red.

"uhm.." kenma started. "i.."

"I'M BACK!! D'YA MISS ME?" kuroo (the actual one, not his twin who woke u up)

you both whipped ur heads around and tried to untangle yourselves before he saw, but it was too late.

"oya?" (I NEVER PUT ANYTHING DOWN IN JAPANESE BUT IT JUST FELT SO APPROPRIATE) he had the biggest smirk on his face.

"ding a ling ling! whoa look at that i have a call be right back~!"

that cheeky brat.

"so, um, kenma.." you started, not really knowing what to say.

he cut you off. "how about we have this conversation after the trip is over?"

"yeah. lets do that."

the rest of the trip was actually decently fun, especially knowing that your crush liked you back and that you could look forward to that conversation after it was over. and as much as you hated to admit it, it was all thanks to kuroo and his idiotic brain.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Hi! I was wondering if you could please write a layla el faouly x reader imagine where Layla gets into a heated argument with someone. And then Layla begins threatening them, so Y/n, picks up Layla and carries/drags them out of the room before anyone gets hurt. But in order to shut layle completely up, y/n brings layla into a kiss. 😅😅

A/n: I love Layla so fucking much, I apologise if she’s occ. a misogynistic dickhead gets hit once in this but not by Layla cuz I don’t want their filth to touch her okay.

tw: misogynistic men who can’t use words correctly to insult someone.

In all the time you’ve known Layla El Faouly, you known how protective she was over the people she cares and loves genuinely. So naturally whenever you a managed to get yourself hurt -whether intentional or accidental- during your escapades Layla would always be there to scold you on your lack of self awareness as she patches you up with quick and experienced hands that told you this wasn’t her first time patching someone of their injuries meanwhile yours could use work. Layla was a talented woman who had a passionate fire that roared brightly within her that every time you went to look at her you had to make sure you weren’t blinded by her light. There was so much about her that you loved beyond words that whenever she asked what was it about her that attracted you to her you would always say there weren’t enough words remotely close enough to describe even an once of emotion that you felt towards her; cheesy as that may come across as she would then scoff playfully before shoving you by your shoulder with a wide smile across her face, her dark eyes watching how every part of your face softened just for her and only her.

So one night after a hellish mission you and Layla decided to enjoy each other’s company by walking through the streets together; stopping by a small family owned shop at the very end of the street for some beverages and a heaping load of snacks all shoved into a plastic bag -including marshmallows, Layla’s favourite- before making your way to a small secluded spot in a nearby park where you’d get the perfect view of the stars despite the light pollution. Unfortunately when you arrived there was two lads, roughly in their fourties’ or so from how many grey hairs you could count in their hairs despite it being dark out and how they obviously were staring and making crude comments at some girls across from them that were way under the age of being able to buy cigarettes at a shop. “Oi!” You called out to them, “how about instead of looking at them and go gander at women your own age or does that turn you off knowing you can’t manipulate them?”

The shorter of the two looked at the two of you with a sneer as he puffed his chest out in attempts of coming across as hard but in reality he looked about as constipated as one would after some undercooked takeout. “What did you just say to me cunt?” His breath stank like rotten shit and his teeth looked like they were forming a colony of mold. You raised your brow at his vulgarness but before you could comment on how he had a face not even his sorry excuse of a mother would love before then adding on to that with how his mother probably never loved him anyway. Layla stepdad in front of you with a sneer of her own as she was practically chest to chest with the prick before letting loose her own choice of words. “We wouldn’t have to repeat what we said if your ears weren’t so full of your own shit.” The man’s beady little eyes looked her over before a scum bag smirk appeared on his face, completely ignoring the venomous words thrown his way, “and what’re you going to do bitch? Talk me ear off like all you women do when something doesn’t go your way, why can’t you just accept the fact that neither of you are the ones with the power in this situation. Why don’t you go back to the kitchen where you belong.”

His friend snorted from behind him like a coward with his tail between his legs because he hadn’t moved at all during his friends little misogynistic spew. You knew he was only there so the other guy would look tougher by comparison but that didn’t mean you should underestimate him based on that alone. You looked to Layla and saw how her fists clenched and her jaw tightened in anger as she stared the man down before flashing him a faux smile. “What is it like knowing that I earn more then what you could hardly attempt to make in a month, what is it like knowing I’ve got more guts then you and your cowardly little shit of a friend with the receding hairline behind you. If anything you it should be you two who should be fucking off after all this is OUR space your taking up after all. So do me and my significant other a favour and FUCK OFF.”

God you fucking loved Layla so much that you couldn’t help but smirk with pride at the mens fallen faces and how their sudden silence told you that they weren’t expecting a powerful woman such as Layla to plant them on their asses as gracefully as she did and now they were struggling for insults they could use back at you. Yet they somehow found some words in their limited vocabulary to do so, “you ugly bitch, don’t you know I could fucking kill you and your ugly cunt right here right now?! You cunts couldn’t even keep a man even if you tried! No one wants a bitch who talks back to the man who pays for everything,” he looked loved at you and that smug smirk came back in full force as he looked you over as you scowled at him, just about ready to sock him in the jaw before kicking his dick for good measure, “how about your significant other comes with me and my friend and we’ll show them a good time.” You almost gagged at the connotation of those words. You had enough for one night and now all you wanted to do was to go home with Layla and watch shitty low budget movies instead then listen to this twat and his bullshit monologues of where a woman’s place should be in life. They obviously haven’t met Layla El Faouly.

“Talk to my partner like that again and I’ll break your jaw so I can shovel the week old dogshit off the side of the road and make you swallow it before I break the arms of your friend back their and shove them up your ass and-“ just as Layla was getting into the vivid details of dismemberment you decided enough was enough and swooped your lover over your shoulder; though not before landing a solid blow to the man’s head, watching as he collapsed to the floor and as his friend was occupied trying to bring him back into consciousness you carried Layla all the way back home. Several times you had to adjust yourself so she wouldn’t be able to get off your shoulder and leg it back to the men and feel more then a bruised ego, so when you got back home Layla was just about to let you have it when you brought her into a searing kiss, holding the small of her back with one hand to press her into you while using the other to run across her jaw as you kissed everything you had into her; Letting her know how much you valued her above everything and how you were grateful that she ever thought to choose you as her partner in not only occupation but in love also. You were damn lucky to have Layla in your life and she was damn lucky to have you too.

“I love you Layla but I’m not about to have you going to prison for shovelling shit with that dudes mouth.” You said as you pulled away, leaning your forehead against hers as she closed her eyes to drink you in as a smile appeared on her face. You always knew how to make her smile, how to make her feel powerful by just being your genuine self. You were honesty with her and that’s what she valued above anything for she’s been kept in the dark before so for you to be open about anything and everything meant a lot to her as to her it meant that you trusted her with even the most vulnerable parts of yourself. In addition you were also very patient so that when she opened up to you it was one of the most memorable moments of your lives. Trust bounded you together now love has kept you together. No misogynistic dickhead was gonna change that.

[arcadejohn127-9]

ALSO- I have a request! Brothers (+royals if you want) reacting to an MC who is extremely affectionate once they like someones- gives hugs, praises often, gives gifts, does their best to help when they can- but if any of this affection is returned they cry. Hard. Because they're emotionally constipated and any affection or love they receive overwhelms them- this also embarrasses them extremely-

Damn.... didn't think I'd feel called out by a prompt request XD it seems my time has come!

I'm guessing royals are Diavolo and barbatos so I added them but if you ever request again and someone you wanted wasn't here, feel free to comment and I'll make sure to add them

Brothers + Diavolo & barbatos with an overly affection MC with issues

Lucifer:

He grew use to your affection ways

The words of praise when you notice he finished a work load

Or when you'd pat his head when he was tired

At first he wondered why you would handle or touch him likes he's a fragile doll but he grew to love how gentle you were

Subconsciously he'd lean his head down whenever he completed a task expecting a head pat

Even if you weren't there but if he's caught he'll just pretend he was tired

Lucifer wasn't always the most affectionate, especially as he rarely shows how much he genuinely loves the people around them

He decided to return the gesture, you recently got a high grade in a class you were struggling in

He patted your head, giving it a light ruffle

"You did good, you're improving alot - it's very promising."

Didn't expect you to start crying, aggressively shoving away your tears

"what's wrong? Did something-"

"I just- this is embarassing- you patted my head and people don't really do that for me and I just-"

"Ah, I see, then I shall do it more often."

"even in public?"

He was never a public man, wanting to get his softer side hidden in the protection of his soul and the walls surrounding his room

But here you were, crying because he simply caressed your cheek

He wants you to be happy and feel as loved as he does

So he'll happily push his walls down for you

"if it means this much to you, then yes but let's keep it appropriate."

Mammon:

"How's my handsome super model?! Did it go well? Aww you look tired, let's get you rested, okay?"

He's so in love

No one has ever made him feel this mooshy and love sick and he's ANCIENT

He's use to his brothers always insulting him - he likes a good tease and making a rude remark about each other but they tend to push it

They hit his Insecurities and think he can handle it because they're demons

But he wasn't always

Then you came along, giving him head pats and words of praise

Always standing up for him

He fell for you so quickly and so hard

He basically turns into a puppy when he's with you

When you left with Satan to get groceries he had to be forced to not go with you, waiting at the stairs for you to come back

As soon as Satan left with even your bags included, he came bolting for you

Leaping into your arms and squeezed you tight, insisting he didn't miss you but just got bored

The way he's nuzzling your cheek says otherwise

When you began crying he immediately panicked

"Did Satan do something to ya?! I swear I'll beat-"

"I'm just not use to others being as affectionate as I am back to me - it's okay."

"Huh?! Well I guess the greatest demon of all time has to be that person, that's me! Don't forget it, okay?! I'm going to smother you."

Mammon is already a touchy person but knows to be respectful, since that day his hands are always on you

Either holding your hand, touching your shoulder, petting your hair or just Hugging you

Levithan:

Levithan isn't one to give or receive when it comes to affection

He tends to get overwhelmed by just a head pat and gets embarassed if his fingers accidentally brush against yours

You're an overly affectionate person

He's a simple man who needs self worth

It's definitely a good duo

You've learned to be more vocal about your praises and affections, still testing the waters with physical touch

But from time to time he'll ask to get a head pat if he's really proud of himself

Has made you call him your little pog champ

"Levi are you- oh sorry you're streaming- I'll just leave these here."

He was confused until he saw the section dish filled with different snacks with a energy drink in the middle

He almost teared up

"No! Stay with me, they'll like you!"

In an act of no thoughts and boldness, he pulled you into his lap

You fell awkwardly and was half straddling half on his side

As soon as you got comfortable you hide your face In his neck forcing back tears

Not wanting to cry on stream

"You're so sweet, levi, I'm sure your followers can agree."

He literally short circuited

Hiding his face in your shoulder as he got flustered

"You're sweeter than me, you're always being nice to me - I really lo- like you for that."

Anyone who watched that stream now ships you - the non believers didn't believe all the stories he told about you but now they had physical proof

That stream was re-upload so many times with comps filled with him gushing about you

Levithan is determined to make sure you never see them but it's too late and you cried with joy in your room

Next time you saw him you kissed his cheek and he immediately melted

Did kiss your cheek back though but did it so quick and harsh that you stumbled backwards

Satan:

Someone being gentle to him????

Someone who doesn't keep away from his because of his sin????

Who??? What??!!

You're the who! he was SHOCKED you were so happy to get close to him and just treat him so kindly

He made a theory on the Devildom detectives group that you're actually an angel but it backfired by demons just telling him he's got feelings for you

He does but he didn't expect to get called out on a whole forum

"You're really smart, thanks for always helping me with my studies - I've found It alot easier to study and remember all my notes now, you're a good teacher!"

He's so smitten with you

You could be saying the most disgusting or insulting thing and he'd still smile and nod

He needed help getting food for this secret but really not so secret pet cat and you gladly accepted to help him

When you two were just spending time together in his room and when suddenly picked up his cat

You didn't think too much of it but grinned when he booped the cats nose onto yours

"thank you for being so kind to me- it means alot."

the cat was like you; overly affectionate so it didn't surprise you when it started gently pawing at your face and giving you little kisses

"I feel embarrassed by admitting this so I'm letting Chaos show how I feel."

He avoided looking at you

It would be for the best as you started crying, taking the cat from his hold and kissing it's head repeatedly

"and that's how I feel about you trying to move through your discomfort and be open with me."

His cheeks are BURNING

Holds your hand throughout the rest of the hang out

Asmodeus:

You're being gentle and affection despite Everyone perceiving him as a sex hungry annoyance?

You're immediately his favourite - sorry Solomon

You always understood his protectiveness over his appearance

Fixing his hair and pushing back stands if you ever pet it

You didn't need to but you always told him you washed your hands before touching his face

You always did these simple things to make him feel at ease

But he loved your touch

No matter any comment he makes; he adores you and just being able to have these tender moments with you

He knew you were special to him when you walked in on him

Barely awake, hair messy, no makeup or moisturizer - he didn't look even the slightest bit appealing

And just smiled, looking at him no differently even when his voice came out tired and croaky

"You're really pretty even when you just wake up, it's so unfair - what's your secret?"

"because it's me, darling! I always look good~"

Internally, he was freaking out about how you liked him at what he deemed - his most unattractive state

So it only made sense he became more touchy and grew closer to you

"are you sure I look good in this? I know you're very up to date with fashion."

"You look stunning, I haven't seen a bad look on you yet, perhaps your charm is just as high as mine."

He was holding your hips, smiling as you both looked in the mirror

He wrapped his arms around you, leaning on your shoulder

"I think you look good all the time, you're just amazing like that."

You tried to hide your tears but he could see them, immediately asking you what's wrong

"Nothing- I just- that means alot coming from you and you're always being so affection towards me....its really nice."

He just hugs you tighter, smiling

"I just treat you how you treat me, you're a real angel."

Beezlebub:

This guy is worried about so many things

He's scared of hurting you

He's worried if he gets carried away with touching you he'll make you uncomfortable and his gluttony will act up; wanting more of your tender touch until he feels full

The last thing he wants is to make you uncomfortable or you feel forced to be affectionate to him because he could throw a fit

He's always ashamed of his hunger tantrums

But when he does do affection it's either carrying you or holding your hand

But was so happy whenever you cuddled hi against him or when you gave him praise

He could spend the whole day with you running your fingers through his hair, telling him he's a good demon and that he means something to you

"Can you finish this for me? I'm not feeling that hungry right now."

You offered your bowl to Beel, he happily took it

As you two spent time with each other he noticed you eyeing some of the more sweeter things set out on the table

He gently pushed it towards you

"Eat if you want it, I'll share."

You waved your hand, not wanting to take food from him

"I'm just snack-ish, I can't eat a meal right now."

You knew how hungry he could get and didn't want to leave him peckish

You knew that small feeling could easily turn into something bigger

But he just nudged it closer to you

"You eat what you want, I'll have what you don't finish."

You finally agreed, knowing he was insisting on you to eat with him

He patted your head, smiling as he watched you eat

"are you sure you won't still feel hungry?"

"you make me feel full, it soothes another type of hunger in me, it's nice."

He grabbed your hand, nuzzling his cheek against it, he couldn't stop smiling as you just looked at him in surprise

You finally grinned, tearing up and shook your head, you leaned against him and continued eating

Gripping his hand tighter as you pushed back your tears

Belphegor:

He was spoilt

Beel was always looking after him, helping him get ready for school and drying his hair, carrying him around when he was too tired to walk

And you were only fueling his spoilt nature

You always showered him in affection

Petting his hair whilst he laid his head on your lap, combed his tail, told him he looked cute

"My precious little belphie, are you feeling okay? I noticed you were struggling to sleep today at lunch."

Whilst he believed he looked intimidating with his heavy bags and sleepy grin

You found him adorable, treating him like a sweet innocent boy on those special nights of just you two cuddling

It's been a long time since he's felt innocent

You were always checking in on him

Making him feel special and cared for

He was a soft mess in your hands

"Hold me more, your hands feel so nice~"

He placed his hands on yours, making you gently squish his cheeks

"Don't you wanna cuddle?"

He raised a brow, a smug smile growing on his face

"it seems you want to."

"we don't have to-"

"If you wanna be held just ask, I'm more than happy to hold you."

He wrapped his arms around you, shifting his position and buried his face into your chest, humming as your hands ran through his hair

He gave you a small squeeze

"It feels good to be the one hugging you, you're always so comfy~"

He began murmuring how much he loves this time with you, drifting to sleep as he praised you, letting himself mindlessly go on about how wonderful and sweet you are until he started to snore

You let your tears fall

Holding him closer as you softly thanked him for his words

He just hugged you tighter in his sleep, his smile growing

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

This man is TOUCH STARVED

the fact you're unafraid to be with him and around him is already amazing but you freely hold his hand and pat his head

He thinks he's knocked his head and been taken to the celestial realm

People are intimidated by his title as prince and having you so care free in his company is new for him

So of course he enjoys how affectionate you are!

He embraces all your touches and praise!

He's even had you sitting on his lap during meetings, letting you hug him after a tiring day of studying

"You did great today, I really felt your passion for this new project, I think the students will really enjoy it!"

He gets so happy everytime you even look his way

Your smile alone fuels him for the whole day

"Meet me in the castle today, there's something I need you to do for me."

You agreed, not thinking much of it; most likely a new update on the school fair

What you didn't expect was to be greeted by shopping bags and gift boxes and even a human sized teddy bear with demon horns, you tried to ignore them as Diavolo came jogging down the steps

"What did you need me for?"

"I want you to see what you like, I bought as much as I could before Barbatos stopped me, I hope they're up to your liking."

You were speechless

You felt as if you touched the gifts you wouldn't be able to hold back; you were excited to see what he got but you didn't want to seem too excited

"Please, go ahead - it's all yours unless something is not up to your liking."

You finally went through the shopping bags; there was clothes, products, jewelry, shoes and all other sorts of items

You hugged the giant close to your chest, choking back on your tears

"thank you-"

"No need to thank me, you're always so kind to me I just wanted to return the favour."

Barbatos:

You were a like a breath of fresh air, someone he could just go to

He can unwind and be rewarded for his efforts and others normally don't notice

Whilst his lord was always praising him, it felt different with you

It felt so joyful

You would brush through his hair, always thank him even if he's just doing his job and always seem to be in awe at what he does

He'll never forget the gloves you gave him, sleek and a perfect fit with a cursive 'B' stitched to the edge - they were enchanted to warm up whenever he got cold

"Wow! You prepared all this?! That must of taken you ages! You're really amazing, Barb."

"I'm simply doing my job but your praise makes it all worth it."

Often invites you to the castle for tea

He'll make any excuse to have you come see him; the prince wants to talk, he wants a hand with a recipe, he needs an outsider's opinion on something

Whatever he can come up with; he will use it

You might as well just stay in one of the guest bedrooms because you're always coming to the castle

Speaking of excuses; today Barbatos decided to thank your lovely behaviour

Convincing you to come to the castle and meet him in the dining hall

"I saw you eyeing some recipes whilst helping me in the kitchen so, I made you them AND wrote down how I did it exactly so you can make them any time you like."

"I- you didn't have to do that! Thank you for this, they look delicious."

"I always wanted to give you this."

You couldn't even ask what it was

He already held it up for you to see

It was a box of gloves with your the first letter of your name stitched onto the edge

They were heat up gloves!

"I thought you'd appreciate your own as they'll always be handy but the gesture of matching with someone you're close to is very appealing."

He helped you put the gloves on, pinching the tip of your fingers to make sure they fitted properly

He held your hand, admiring how it looked in his

You couldn't stop a few tears forming, smiling

You felt abit silly crying over heat up gloves but you couldn't help it

"I want to match with you more often, perhaps one day it'll end up being a ring."

[mizunetzu]

ok ok so my request 👉🏻👈🏻

it’s the most obvious thing but i have a full crush on bakugou, so can you please write about him x male reader, where the reader is like.. having nightmares or almost doesn’t sleep because of his quirk (idk like maybe he can hear something special or predict anything bad, doesn’t really matter) but feels safe around bakugou so he always falls asleep around him or even oN him and katsuki is like “😡(❤️)shit whatever” and the reader is kinda shy about that but totally ok with their friends being like “wow bro that’s kinda gay :> ” because he is comfortable with “oh that’s because i aM the gay✌🏻” and his classmates love him and everything and would never mock.. but one time someone from another class was really really rude bcs of that or said that katsuki hates it so the reader starts to avoid bakugou and bakugou geTS MAD about it because reader is just his and no one else’s >:0 maybe a little confession from him in the end, maybe some.. *gay coughing* angy k*ss from him

please make it angsty but with a fluffy ending please please and thank you very much in advance💙 sorry if it’s too big i can’t explain my thoughts properly thaha

Bruh I just realized how long this request is 💀💀 also look at me, writing it like decades after you requested it 😭 pls enjoy I’m actually quite proud of it (also isn’t that gif perfect hahah get it bc the prompt was abt like sleeping and bakugou’s sleeping and-yeah I’ll let u read now)

——————

Bakugou x reader - Angry Insomniacs

⚠️Warnings - mild arguing, it’s not that bad

Pronouns - male, he/him

——————

“Why are you always fuckin’ sleeping on me?”

It first started during the Sports Festival. The chicken race and cavalry battle really took a toll on (Y/n), and he was suffering harsh quirk drawbacks. That, being drowsiness.

Somewhere on the stands, (y/n’s) eyes grew heavier and heavier until he realized he had fallen asleep. He also didn’t realized until he woke up that no one disturbed him when he was near Bakugou. Be it fear, or just plain respect, (Y/n) seemed to get the best rest when he was with Bakugou. Not even Iida dared to wake him up when he dosed off on Bakugous shoulder.

He always made it a point to be in Bakugous vicinity when ever he could, taking naps with his head buried in his arms next to Bakugou at lunch, or having his head resting on his shoulder in the dorms.

“Oi! Don’t drift off on me!”

“Mm? Sorry, Bakugou.”

(Y/n) rubbed his eyes as he weakly pushed off the common room couch, stretching and yawning as he did so. “Can I sleep in your room tonight?”

“N-no, dumbass! Fuck kinda question is that, shit-for-brains?!”

“I’ll see you there later then, Bakugou.” (Y/n) gave a slight nod, Bakugou practically foaming at the mouth already, before trotting off the continue his nap in his own room.

Before heading to his room though, he walked into the kitchen to grab a post-nap time snack. Tsuyu, who was already digging in the fridge, stepped back so (Y/n) could grab whatever he wanted.

Tsu eyed (Y/n’s) slightly tousled hair. “Did you take another nap on bakugou-chan? Kero.”

(Y/n) hummed out a “yes.” Tsu hummed back in acknowledgment. Kaminari and Kirishima, unintentionally, started listening in from their place in the kitchen after hearing Bakugou being mentioned.

Tsuyu put a finger to her lip. “Ne, (Y/n)-chan, why do you always take naps on Bakugou-chan? It’s always him, kero, and you go out of your way to make sure it’s only him.”

“Why?” (Y/n) pulled off the carton of milk stubbornly hanging on to the fridge. “Because I like Bakugou. Duh. And I sleep better near people I like.

Kaminari gasped comically while Kirishima sputtered and choked on his words. Not just listening anymore, Kaminari but in. “L-like? Like, ‘like’-like?!”

Kaminari and Kirishima joined Tsuyu and (Y/n) near the fridge. (Y/n) nodded out an “mm-hm.”, whilst grabbing a cup from the cabinet.

“So you’re like...” Kirishima made wild, indecipherable, gestures with his hand. Eventually, after realizing no one was taking the hint, brought his voice down to a whisper.

“...like...gay..?”

“Yeah. Pretty much.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell us?!” Kaminari grasped at his blond hair. (Y/n) thought for a moment, poured himself a glass of milk, and shrugged.

“I don’t know. You never asked.”

“And you’re so comfortable just telling us now? Why, kero-kero?”

“Because I’m gay as fuuuuuck.” (Y/n) took a swig of milk like it was a shot of whiskey. “And it’s not like it was a secret or anything.”

“Though I don’t think Bakugou knows. He’s too angry about me sleepin’ on him all the time to actually care about me.”

(Y/n) polished off his glass of milk. He set the cup down gently into the sink. “Eh, it’s not like I actually care for what he thinks about me.”

“See ya, I’m gonna finish my nap.”

“Uh-bye”

“Bye-bye.”

“Bye, kero.”

———

(Y/n) yawned as his head lolled off of Bakugou’s shoulder. He hissed, dusting off his shoulder angrily.

“Go sleep somewhere else!”

“I’m just goin’ to the bathroom, Bakugou, I’ll be back. Keep your shoulder warm for me.”

(Y/n) weakly stood up from his chair, and sluggishly walked out of the cafeteria. Damn, his feet felt heavy. Maybe if he hurried to the bathroom, he’d get back in time to catch a few more minutes of sleep before Bakugou exploded on him or lunch ended.

(Y/n’s) shoulder accidentally caught on someone else’s, making him stumble back and rub his shoulder. Monoma tilted his chin up in a mocking fashion.

“Ara? Is that (L/n) (Y/n) from class 1-A I see?”

(Y/n) nodded, only half processing his words as he continued on his way to the bathroom. Monoma followed somewhat behind, spewing words and one-liners that went in one ear and out the other. That is, until,

“Honestly, you would’ve thought that angry blond kid would’ve told you by now”.

(Y/n’s) ear perked up. He halted to a stop, Monoma following suit and shoving his hands smugly in his pockets. “What’s this about Bakugou?”

“Oh? He really didn’t tell you, huh? That’s...” Monoma stifled a condescending snicker. “...surprising.”

(Y/n) stepped closer. “C’mon man, tell me what?”

Monoma sighed. “Well,”

“I heard that Mr. Blasty, matter-o-factly,” Monoma jabbed his pointer finger into (Y/n’s) chest. “Really, really hates it when you sleep on, or near him. Actually,”

“I think he just hates you in general.”

(Y/n) furrowed his brows. He’s lying. He’s lying. He likes him, doesn’t he? Bakugou likes him, or else he wouldn’t have lead him on for so long, right?

Because he wouldn’t let just anyone sleep on his shoulder...right?

“You’re lying.”

“Well, believe what you want, honestly,” Monoma made a show of crossing his arms dramatically. “But you should see the way he shit-talks and glares at you in you’re sleep. It’s not like he can push you off though, you’re ‘just so persistent you’ll never leave him the fuck alone’.”

(Y/n) shoved his hands in his pockets. Monoma raised his hands in defense. “His words, not mine.”

(Y/n) turned on his heel and began to speed walk to the bathroom. Monoma yelled out from his spot in the empty hallway.

“Oh? You don’t want to hear what he thinks about your little crush on him?”

(Y/n) froze. He was under the assumption that everyone but him knew, could he be wrong? He pressed his lips into a fine line, turning around as composedly as he could. Though, he couldn’t mask the fearful curiosity in his eyes.

Monoma grinned. It was an unpleasant, sarcastic grin, one that didn’t look peaceful or pleasing at all.

“Well, I doubt that there’s anything to to say at all, so does it really ma-“

“What...what does he say about me?” (Y/n’s) voice quivered. He knew he was falling into Monoma’s trap, that he was just trying to provoke him, that he was looking for any kind of reaction, but his curiosity got the best of him. It really did, because Monoma’s words stabbed spears into (Y/n’s) heart, word by word.

“Blasty thinks it’s fucking disgusting how you like him, like, as another dude. Like honestly, he thinks you take him for an idiot for thinking he actually didn’t know! And the fact you sleep so close to him know full well you want to get in his pants?! He thinks you’re a pervert! A lazy shit! A fag! Ahahaha!”

Monoma loud cackles were cut short when he suddenly slumped over. He sunk to the ground, revealing Kendo, holding one big hand up and the other to her waist. She most likely knocked Monoma out once she heard his condescending retorts from the cafeteria.

Kendo sighed, bending down the haul Monoma’s arm over her shoulder. Her heavy glare softened once she caught sight of (Y/n’s) buggy eyed face starting at the ground where Monoma was.

“Sorry...he didn’t say anything too harsh, right?” Kendo’s words were gentle, but they sounded practically inaudible to (Y/n’s) traumatized ears.

He wordlessly staggered past her, heading back into the cafeteria to grab his lunch and sit elsewhere. He supposed he wouldn’t bother Bakugou anymore. Since he’s so damn ‘persistent’, he figured he’d stop bothering him for the rest of the day.

He wished he wasn’t so curious about what Bakugou thought of him. Like people say, ignorance is bliss. He could’ve gone his whole high school career without knowing Bakugou hated his every being. How was he going to face him in class knowing every pointer glare, every scoff, every insult was genuine?

(Y/n) felt his throat tighten. For the first time in years, (L/n) (Y/n) was fully awake.

——

It was the first time in many months that (Y/n) didn’t sit in the seat next to Bakugou, napping in his presence. He’d done it every day no fail, that is until this week. Actually, this is the 6th consecutive day he didn’t take a nap at all.

(Y/n) sat placid in his assigned seat, eyes wide and trying to keep awake. He couldn’t sleep without thinking of Bakugou, and every time he did it was always him scoffing and turning his back on him.

Every few seconds, (Y/n) would jolt harshly in his seat, rocking back and forth like a drug addict in withdrawal. He stared at his desk with eyes that could kill someone, and he dug his hands into his forearms to keep himself somewhat awake.

He didn’t hear Kirishima calling his name until he snapped his fingers infront of his face. The snap rang like a gunshot, surprising (Y/n) from his trance so badly he jolted back like he got electrocuted. Kirishima raised an eyebrow.

“You...ok man...?”

(Y/n’s) dry eyes landed fixed onto Kirishima. He relaxed, and let out a breath he didn’t know he was taking. “M’fine...”

His voice cracked like it hadn’t been used for days. (Y/n) let his eyes drift back forward, hunching back over and huddling his body like he was trying to squeeze himself to death. When Kirishima gave him a skeptical glare and crossed his arms, (Y/n) let out a small “m’ just tired, that’s all...” and gave the most pathetic smile known to man.

“If you’re so tired,” Mina, rested her arms on the back of (Y/n’s) chair. “Why don’t you sleep on Bakugou like you do every morn-“

“NO! I-I can’t do that!” (Y/n) whipped his head back, gripping the back of his chair so hard his hand turned white. Mina and Kirishima flinched, noticeably caught off guard with his sudden outburst. “I...can’t...I can’t do that...”

(Y/n) suddenly looked very awake, contrasting the way he looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open the whole time they were in class.

(Y/n’s) breath steadied as he shut his mouth awkwardly. “M’sorry...for yelling...didn’t mean to...”

(Y/n) scrubbed at his eyes. The rush of adrenaline was already wearing off. Mina set her dainty pink hand on (Y/n’s) hunched form. “Why not...?”

“I just can’t.”

(Y/n) said nothing more. He went back to his occasional jolts awake and scrubbing his heavy eyes every 2 minutes. Kirishima sighed, shaking his head towards Bakugou, before shrugging his shoulders then forming an ‘X’ with his hands.

Bakugou clicked his tongue angrily, turning and facing back forward in his seat.

——

(Y/n) was practically seeing stars by the end of hero’s class.

It was a relatively simple assignment, 1 on 1 sparring, but it caused a lot of quirk use.

He fought both his tired eyes and Midoryia, but ultimately failing due to his harsh quirk drawbacks. Midoryia barely had to break a sweat to have (Y/n) come toppling down.

(Y/n) was ushered back into the horde of students murmuring “don’t mind” and “you did great!”, but he just slithered past and stood a few feet away from them, all the way in the back of the field.

All might was explaining something (Y/n) couldn’t quite hear. Not only because he was standing so far away, but because his hearing had been considerably wonky, not to mention the hissing, ringing sound irritating his eardrums.

“Oi.”

And even if the ringing had stopped and he could hear, his brain was too tuckered out to remember anything past five seconds ago.

“Oi!”

Gosh, speaking of his brain-

“OI! SHIT-FOR-BRAINS! YOU GONNA KEEP IGNORING ME OR YOU GONNA TELL ME WHY YOU’VE BEEN AVOIDIN’ ME?!”

Bakugou set off a small explosion. The blast wasn’t nearly as loud or powerful as in combat, but to a tired mans ears, it sounded like nukes. The ringing in (Y/n’s) ears spiked, and he cupped his ears tightly.

“B-Bakugou, nows not-“

“OH, YOU TRYNA TUNE ME OUT BY COVERIN’ YOUR EARS NOW?!” Another explosion. Bakugou’s gauntlets had been out for repairs since his last hero training, so (Y/n) could clearly see the glowing red and yellow spark from his fist. The ringing spiked again. His vision burned with sparks.

(Y/n) winced, saying nothing, and brought his hands to rub at his eyes. Bakugou eyebrow twitched.

“STOP IGNORING ME!”

Bakugou brought his hand out, his gloved hand starting to glow red with his next explosion. (Y/n) couldn’t take it anymore.

He stumbled forward, and grabbed Bakugou’s wrist. He shoved it out of the way, but his hand still ignited and set off a blast that propelled them straight to the ground.

“G-get off-a me!” Bakugou tried pushing (Y/n) off with his free hand.

(Y/n) pinned Bakugou’s glowing right hand by the wrist, using his other to hold down his other shoulder. (Y/n) would’ve never done something as ballsy and stupid as this, but he was too tired, too done, too much in pain to care.

“What are you actually trying to say!? All that stupid extra yelling and petty insults, they get you fucking nowhere! Spit it out! Or does trying to intimidate every single fucking person you meet just self-satisfaction?!”

Bakugou growled. He grabbed at (Y/n’s) shoulders, pushing off of him and pinning (Y/n) to the ground in his place.

“Then what about you, huh?!” Bakugou was angrily spitting at (Y/n’s) face. “Why the fuck did you stop getting enough sleep for your quirk?! Are you just that dumb that you stay up at night?!”

“I don’t wanna hear it from a stupid fucker like you, who can’t even take care of himself!”

(Y/n) hissed. He freed his dominant hand from Bakugou’s vice grip and pushed at Bakugou’s face, grabbing a fistful of his hair. “All you ever do is shit talk! Shut up! No one thinks it’s fucking cool!”

“What the hell are you even talking about?!”

The two wrestled on the ground, angrily grabbing and tugging at each other, and rolling around on the floor. There were shouts of “get Aizawa-no, get midnight-sensei!” and “All might, stop them!”, but the two were so caught up in their fight they couldn’t hear anything.

“Can’t you ever learn to mind your fucking Business?!”

“What the fuck does that even have to do with this!”

(Y/n) flipped Bakugou over one more time. He pushed him down by the forehead, pushing his head down into the ground while Bakugou flailed and kicked from underneath him.

“SHUT UP! WHY DO YOU EVEN FUCKIN’ CARE, BAKUGOU?! WHY DO...w-why do...wh...”

A sweet, sweet smell flooded (Y/n’s) senses. It smelt relaxing, tantalizing, it smelled like sleep. It smelled like sleep. He wanted to sleep. He wanted to sleep so bad. Maybe he could just...

(Y/n) slowly sank from his spot on top of Bakugou, flopping on top of his body and going completely slack. Bakugou’s eyes widened, and he covered his nose.

Midnight strutted from above the two, waving away a few stray wisps of her mist. Bakugou hacked out a new breath, while (Y/n) laid on top of him, peacefully asleep for the first time in days.

“Well, it seems like you two already know without me saying it.” Midnight motioned over to two small robots carrying a stretcher. “I’ll just take him to recovery girl and he should wake up in-“

Bakugou pursed his lips and wrapped his arms around (Y/n’s) sleeping figure when Midnight extended her arm towards them. He tightened his arms around (Y/n).

“I’ll do it. S-since this piece of shit attacked me first and...I’ll just do it-!”

Midnight eyed him knowingly, before waving him off and mumbling something about ‘youth’.

——

(Y/n’s) eyes fluttered open. His body felt like it was broken in every way possible. It was so sore, it hurt even thinking about moving. (Y/n) laid there, with his eyes half open, contemplating whether or not he should close them again.

Would he be able to sleep, though? Even if he’d started sleeping near Bakugou as a ‘don’t-wake-me-up’ measure, it slowly stopped being just that and more a matter of he felt safe and comfortable around him. In a way, he’s become a bit dependent on him, which is probably a bad thing, but he didn’t care.

Sleeping with Bakugou felt best. But that wasn’t an option, now was it?

(Y/n) pursed his lips, an involuntary groan rumbling from his tired vocal cords. He continued staring at the blinding nurse office lights, staring until he saw spots in his vision.

“Stop doing that-do you wanna go fuckin’ blind?”

(Y/n) flinched. He hated the way that familiar, aggravated voice still stirred butterflies into his stomach. He glanced to his side, as if to make sure he wasn’t just hearing things.

He met eyes with Bakugou.

“Bout’ time you fuckin’ woke up. Been waitin’ forever, shit-for-brains.”

(Y/n) averted his eyes back up to the blinding floodlights. Bakugou scowled. “Oi! Don’t ignore m-“

“How long were you here for?”

Bakugou went silent. It was his turn to avert his eyes, albeit more angrily.

“...I was here since you fuckin’ fainted in class, idiot. I even carried your stupid body here from the dumbass carrier bots.”

(Y/n’s) eyes softened, unlike Bakugou’s, who glared at the floor just beside the chair he was sitting in. (Y/n) checked the big black clock mounted on top of Recovery Girl’s desk.

It was 6:00 pm.

If Bakugou was telling the truth, he’d been sitting there waiting for him to wake up for 4 hours straight.

“Bakugou-its been hours since class ended-you should be at the dorms by now-! Why did you-“

“Well if you told me why you suddenly started avoiding me we wouldn’t be here right now!”

(Y/n) let his mouth fall closed. Bakugou scoffed. “Well?!”

(Y/n) opened his mouth, but it clamped shut when Monoma’s words echoed in his mind. Bakugou looked at him with an expectant face.

“I can’t tell you.”

“WH-“ Bakugou sputtered angrily. “COURSE YOU CAN! THE FUCKS STOPPING YOU!”

“Nothing I-I just can’t!”

“WHY!? WHY NOT?!”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”

“OK AND?! I LOVE YOU TOO!”

“THEN WHATS THE PROBLEM HERE!” (Y/n) shouted, before he cupped his mouth in realization. Bakugou’s eyes went wide aswell. “Wait I didn’t mean that-“

“YEAH! WHATS THE FUCKIN PROBLEM HERE?!” Bakugou recovered from his initial shock, already back to yelling. (Y/n) furrowed his brows with a blush.

“Wh..wait so-“

“I LIKE YOU, YOU LIKE ME, SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU STOP SLEEPING ON ME?!”

“Wait but...” (Y/n’s) voice was barely above a whisper. “Don’t you, y’know...not like it...when I do that-?”

“DUMBASS! WHERE’D YOU GET THAT FROM?!” It seemed like Bakugou got angrier and angrier each passing second. It was hard to tell what (Y/n) found so attractive about him.

“From...from Monoma...?”

Bakugou looked angrier than ever. (Y/n) raised an eyebrow. “YOU-I CAN’T BELIEVE-! I-! FUCK IT!”

Bakugou snarled and practically shoved his face onto (Y/n’s), angrily stealing his breath away with a kiss. The kiss, surprisingly, was soft and gentle, despite Bakugou’s previous intensity. It seemed to calm Bakugou down, and cheer (Y/n) up.

The two slowly parted for air. It was quiet for a second, something that rarely happened near Bakugou.

“I thought you hated me...”

“W-why the fuck would I hate you...dumbass.” Bakugou rested his forehead on (Y/n’s) shoulder. His spiky tufts of blond hair tickling (Y/n’s) face.

“Because Monoma said so...?”

“I’m gonna kill that bastard.” Bakugou snarled, climbing into the cot (Y/n) was in. He pushed (Y/n) back down into the pillow, pulling up the white blanket and laying down next to him. He guided (Y/n’s) head-a tad bit forcefully-to his chest. “...after we sleep.”

Bakugou shut his eyes, half irritated and half embarrassed, while (Y/n) chuckled tiredly. He nuzzled his head into Bakugou’s chest.

“Goodnight, Bakugou.”

——

Extra:

Monoma walked into class 1-B the next morning. He yawned, still a bit tired, when he ran straight into someone.

“Hey, copycat fucker.”

Monoma looked up. The class was empty, with no one but Bakugou standing infront of him.

Fuck.

Needless to say, Bakugou got another 3 days of house arrest.

——————

Bru this was so long ong

[multiplefandomsblog]

request; Can I request Nagito, Kokichi, and Rantaro with an s/o that has a hard time understanding why someone feels a certain emotion in situations?

pairing(s); rantaro x gn!reader, nagito x gn!reader, kokichi x gn!reader

warnings; blood, violence, broken noses, strong language, kind of angsty — sorry that nagito's is super long- i started off with him and i haven't written in a long time so i just shit all over the place, fluff at kokichi, i have mood swings I'm so sorry about the whiplash you are about to witness

note; yesss i am back to finish these requests yurrrrrr sjansjdhfbasdkjfds I'm not gonna make a big announcement or anything(I'm still trying to figure out how to balance everything in my life rn, so I'm sorry for people who are waiting on me—) , just gonna spit out as many finished requests as i can, sorry for the abrupt pause of everything by the wayz ill be (hopefully) regularly posting works from now on.

(also this request was kind of vague, so i used the example of someone getting upset/angry and reader not understanding why; i hope that's okay :'))

Nagito Komaeda

◊ I think Nagito would understand your struggles more than anyone else.

◊ And… honestly, it kind of reassures him that you share a struggle with him. It makes him feel less alone, less like the odd one out.

◊ Being similar to someone like you in any way, even if it was a genuinely difficult and real struggle; was a blessing in disguise for someone as lowly as him.

◊ Getting that out of the way, Nagito would never see your struggle as what it is. The way he views you, how highly he puts you up on a pedestal, as well as how much hope he believes you to hold; he, at first*, won't help you at all with your struggles.

◊ As a strong believer of hope overcoming despair, good defeating bad; Nagito is positive that the struggles you hold will always be defeated, bludgeoned into a despairing sludge by your all-mighty hope.

◊ And at first, he won't even think of this as a bad thing! You should be proud of it, of course, unless it stirs despair within you.

◊ * That being said, if he sees you struggling with your inability to understand human reactions to an awful point, he would put his obsession with hope aside, and focus on trying to help you as your boyfriend.

◊ Though I'm afraid, he wouldn't be much of a help, because he gets stuck on this one too.

◊ If you ever unintentionally angered someone, however, and/or provoked them to potentially hurt you; he'd immediately step in and lay the damp washcloth of apologies on the accidental fire you had set.

◊ Though there is a high chance, he'll make it worse by saying something he hadn't intended to sound condescending. It just came out that way.

◊ Nagito would never put your well-being before his insatiable need for you to accelerate and empower your hope.

◊ He's your boyfriend before he is your admirer of hope.

— "What...? How can you- how can you be so calm!?" Confusion, fear, and intimidation seemed to overwhelm you as you stepped back, eyebrows creased in utmost confusion as the person before you, seemed to have been angered by your wording.

Suddenly, you had started repeating and reversing over what you had previously said, scanning your wording for things that could have been perceived as offensive; only to grow even more confused as you had found none.

"I... What? Are you... are you mad at me or something?" Your genuine tone of voice, as well as the genuine look of confusion on your face, had been blurred and unnoticed as the ugly emotion of anger seemed to destroy their human senses— and the person had unfortunately taken your question as an insult.

Without another word, the sickening crunch of flesh and bone hitting flesh and bone echoed throughout the trial room. Flesh and bone that had thankfully, and unfortunately, hadn't belonged to you.

"Holy- Someone hold them back!"

"There's... no need for that...!"

Turns out Nagito took the hit for you.

He peeled the hand tending to his nose away from his face, revealing the nasty bruising and the blood dripping down his nostril—despite the gruesome sight of it all, he still seemed to be smiling. Smiling as if something amazing had just happened, and he was dying from the joy he had been feeling.

He wasted no time to spew out whatever he could think of, despite the shock and adrenaline from getting a broken nose, he still fought through the struggle to speak properly, as well as merely breathing without immense pain.

It was like second nature to him, to steer the blame and the aggression away from you—even if it almost killed him. Anything... to protect his hope.

"Haha, this is... Whatever you need to achieve your hope, whether it be a good old-fashioned beat-down or... murder;" a laugh crossing the line to psychotic erupted from Nagito's scratchy throat.

"I personally invite you all—especially (name)—to bruise me up and brutally murder me for your pleasure, and your hop!" —all at the expense of him making sure no one gets the chance to lay a single finger laid onto you.

◊ He loves you, and he swears this is out of (mostly) good intention <3?

◊ i- i think i lost it somewhere in the middle

Rantaro Amami

◊ Literally, the most understanding, supportive, and comforting man you will ever meet and have as an emotional support boyfriend when you struggle with humans and just... humans.

◊ For first impressions, Rantaro will remain as understanding as he already had been, and is. If he visibly sees you struggle with the reactions of others to specific situations, he'd never start up shit, as well as assume you mean something bad immediately. He will always give you the benefit of the doubt, and the fact that he loves you may have been a factor — but I swear, he does this with everyone else too.

◊ If you ever responded/reacted to something that normal human beings usually respond differently, Rantaro would definitely notice, but he wouldn't say anything until he had his suspicions confirmed — and until someone else decided to get pissy or upset about it.

◊ If you ever get into a conflict with someone about how you seem emotionless( even though you're really not ), Rantaro will always be there to defend you and back you up. The first thing he would do is try to understand your side, then their side, and then try to see how the two fit together, and how you both grew to have your reaction.

◊ Most conflicts and arguments end peacefully, at fault to Rantaro's experience of being exposed to many personality types(his sisters), and completely normal and human struggles(also his sisters).

◊ Though, notice how I said most.

◊ Some situations and arguments, really can't be resolved, nor looked past—especially when personal, and very strong feelings are involved. You really can't avoid it when people are still grieving.

◊ But even so, Rantaro will remain a mediator and a peace-keeper until the end; he doesn't and never has enjoyed violence or super over-the-line arguments.

— "N- no, I a- actually don't understand...! I didn't mean to-"

"Oh, shut up! No one's believing that crap!" The shock and the hurt from their words had visibly affected you — the disbelief and their rage hadn't done anything to calm your anxiety from not having understood what had been wrong.

Rantaro would intrude on the one-sided argument, a gentle yet nervous smile on his face as he tried to put some distance between you and the person who had gotten offended. "Hey now, I understand you're upset, but it'll be safer for all of us if you don't insult them. I'm sure this was just a big misunderstanding... let's sit down, yeah?"

◊ If you ever feel frustrated or upset about a past interaction with someone he had reacted in a way you hadn't expected, feel free to expect Rantaro to be there for you with his comfort. Whether it be assurances, hugs, or just a listening ear; he'll be there for you.

◊ He may not understand your struggles to an extreme extent, but he will try his best to empathize with you and to understand you; and if he doesn't? That's okay. Because he still has cuddles + listening to you rant as his plan B solution on getting your frustrations out.

Kokichi Ouma

◊ Kokichi... doesn't understand you at all.

◊ It's second nature to him to react abnormally or to over-exaggerate towards something that probably shouldn't have gained a reaction like that — but that doesn't necessarily mean that had been his true reaction from the start.

◊ They're lies, well, most of it.

◊ When Kokichi notices your confusion, or if you come to him about your frustrations; he won't believe you at first. It's a stupid thing to not trust someone about, yeah, but he lies all the time about this kind of thing — so not only would he feel terrible if you were telling the truth about your real struggle, he would-

◊ Oh, you're telling the truth?

◊ ... Oh.

◊ Well, of course, he feels horrible for his past faked reactions and lies. A part of him believes it to be his fault entirely, whilst the larger, louder part of him believes it to be someone else's fault.

◊ And he's a liar; so of course, he'll lie. To himself, at least.

◊ "Wha—!? Who's been confusing my beloved? Gimme names and I'll get 'em!"

◊ He's not much of a listener, nor a person who really just... talks about serious shit. So despite not wanting to talk directly about serious things, as well as not being the best at comforting you in a 'serious' manner, he has his own little way of dimming your frustrations with human beings.

◊ He won't show it, nor will he mention it, but he does try to be more transparent with you; as well as tries to be less confusing when talking and/or interacting with you.

◊ The reactions are dimmed down, and despite that, he still continues to be silly and still continues to joke around — just not in a way that'll frustrate or confuse you(ish). He's all about getting reactions out of you, especially frustration but, he wouldn't purposely augment your anxiety about this type of thing.

◊ ^^ If he was to do that, however, he would always tell you it was a lie afterwards. After all— despite enjoying the thought of you thinking of him all week—he doesn't want you stressing and/or overthinking about it for the rest of the week.

◊ Kokichi definitely feels guilty of your struggles, however, they may have not blossomed directly from him, he still feels horrible for triggering it? You? — look- what he's trying to say is, he feels awful, and he hadn't meant to make your struggle with understanding other human beings, worse.

◊ Though there are times he does find your confusion and gullibility to be sort of entertaining in a way, but he would constantly feel bad about finding pleasure in your frustration.

◊ Kind of bad.

— "Nishishi! I'm just saying, if someone took a fat shit on my lawn, I would thank them—"

"Wh- Seriously.. ? Why??"

◊ He finds it hilarious how you seem to take his words to heart, but of course, fun comes to an end as he says—

— "Nope! It's a lie!"

[bbhyeoliskooks]

«❝ 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 ❞» - PT. TWO

Yeonjun was the one to break up with you, so why does he want you back now?

➸ check part one out here!

«────« ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Pairing: Yeonjun x Reader (female)

Genre: 335 cups of fluff and 3 cups of angst

Warnings: a bit suggestive maybe??? cursing, eating, cheesy cringe stuff hehe, ++ unedited so there may be a lot of mistakes !!

Song: I’ll Never Love This Way Again

(YUH OMG FINALLY I FINISHED THIS REQUEST IM SCREAMING OMG??? i’m so sorry that this took so long, i know a lot of people waited for it 😭😭 and for the anon who requested this bc there wasn’t a notif- keah accidentally deleted it 😭😭. ngl i would die for yeonjun in this. ANYWAY, i hope you enjoyyy~~ i rlly liked doing something like this and yes i have to mention the happiness it gave me at 1am when i finally finished it 😌💕)

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

As easy as it was to say compared to real life, Choi Yeonjun was a wreck. A horrible, horrible and you must’ve forget to say- horrible wreck! That is including the duration of time before and after the second time you left.

How he roused one morning to you no where in sight after a vicious night of going out was something he deeply regretted. He would do anything to go back to that day, of course. He wasn’t sure about how you were doing, but jeez did he want to see those bright glints in your eyes whenever you saw him again. To see you smiling like nothing was wrong or giggling when he finally made ticklish contact on those sensitive places or even how you’d frown before him due to his carelessness. His mind drew him back to the ungodly hour of 4am when you scolded him for the scar on his arm he didn’t seem to realize until later and the way you made sure nothing else on his body was hurt. Yeah anyone could tell that didn’t go very well considering he was a boy and you were a girl, but that wasn’t the point!

In simple terms, he missed you more than anyone he’s ever laid eyes upon and the plain truth was that. You weren’t easy to be shaken off his mind after that ordeal of getting you to himself for one, final night. It hurt him most to see the disgusted expression on your face as if you were staring straight at a pile of elephant poop on the ground, not wanting to do anything with it because it was useless and foul. He couldn’t possibly make it your fault too, which meant he shouldn’t have been surprised. Breaking your poor heart by insulting you and taking you for granted, everything was wrong with him for thinking this way!

Whether he liked it or not, his heart said differently about this matter.

Perhaps it was the way you looked that night- he could say- however, it was more than that. With your adoring, sparkling eyes that weren’t easy to miss and your stunning, contagious smile that caused ripples of happiness to fly across the room, he couldn’t blame anyone for falling in love with you. After all, he was a victim of it himself so there was no way he could’ve not in the end. All of those things were true especially, but taking in everything to account as well hanging out with you, your unique individual beauty meant nothing.

He just loved you for you. Loved? No, not loved. Loves. He still loves you for you, and he was a fool to realize it this late. He just lost the best thing in his life due to his stupidity; he knew fully well that you couldn’t ever bring yourself to talk to him face-to-face again if the two of you met again. Would you two even come to meet in the first place? That was the true question here. He and you both knew that due to your resistance and remorse for what happened last weekend that you would never permit yourself to see him. Like he said, he couldn’t blame you for that either.

And yet, why is he trying to convince himself that he’s the only one for you? Your every smile was originally because of him, but now... but now, you’d never let him hear that for one, last time. He couldn’t redo his mistakes of the past of hurting you even if he promised never to do that again. And judging this situation, destiny wouldn’t allow that to happen anyway. With all of your encounters, it seemed as if they all turned out the same way. Everything was ripped into shreds.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

“Wait, so you sLEPT WITH HIM?!” Soobin’s voice reached to a dangerous while the two of you paced around the hallways together, trying to quietly talk about last weekend until he so rudely screamed about your untrue administrations. You clasped your hand over his mouth in instinct, punching his shoulder as a warning to keep quiet or else. His body heaved with hearty chuckles while you screamed, telling him to keep his voice down so that you could truly tell him the whole story.

“Soobin! That’s not true; I wouldn’t do anything like that, ever!”

“Well, he’s your ex- and he’s hot, so why wouldn’t you sleep with him?!”

Now some of the students subtly shuffled around to eavesdrop on your conversation, and you groaned at the newfound attention. Just what were you thinking about telling him when sometimes he could contradict himself to be this loud?! It was steaming tea, yes, but no one else had to hear about it! You should’ve told him this stuff at lunch when the two of you were alone.

Swiftly pulling Soobin to the vacant hallway where thankfully no one else was walking, you made sure to keep your voice to a faint hush. You weren’t sure if he could hear you, but you couldn’t risk involving anyone else in this personal matter. Students passed by all around you in the other hallway, holding conversations and walking in groups which was a good sign you could actually speak normally since no one was paying attention anymore.

“So did you or did you not?” He mused, ruffling the top of your head. You pushed his hand away, rolling your eyes at his playfulness when the gravity of the situation needed to be comprehended instead.

“Soobin, I told you we never slept together in that sense last weekend. We were both drunk and shared the same bed! It doesn’t mean anything and we aren’t going to get back together,” you held your breath through those words as you watched the amused smile on his face turn into a pitiful, pouting lip. His adorable puppy dog eyes that were begging you not to get mad at him didn’t seem to work now, and you found yourself telling him off even if you didn’t mean to in the first place.

“You’re so stupid for thinking that, you know?! Yeonjun’s a jerk, I have no clue why I ever got with that bastard in the first place! God, if you never let us meet together then you know I would’ve been happy now. Just why did everything have to turn out this way?!”

The walls of your heart you tried so hard to buttress through your words and actions crumbled with every second you spoke, disintegrating into pure dust the moment your voice leveled to reach your anger. Your chest was trembling as you choked out the last few words, unable to say anything anymore as a lump appeared in your throat. You hated being weak in front of him the most because he’s seen you so many times like this before and he’d very clearly think of you as a crybaby.

He seemed to understand this, shooting you a gently smile as some small encouragement. It was that smile that urged you to snap out of your evil trance immediately. For saying all those rude things to him, it was contradictory since at that very moment you wanted to take everything back. The guilt ate you up in an instant once you took in his dumbfound yet soft expression, causing you to envelope him in a warm embrace as contrition. He never deserved this treatment when it wasn’t even his fault anyway.

“I... I’m sorry, Soobin. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. It’s just so hard on me now since I know I shouldn’t have done that with him last weekend. We didn’t do a lot, and yet I still want to say that I love him...? Even now I won’t allow myself to cry and be weak but,” your voice faltered as your body slightly shivered, “I can’t do it. I just can’t be strong anymore. It’s so hard.”

Soobin sighed, generously allowing you to lean on him like last time. You were so strong- you had always been so strong in front of him, and it hurt him to see that you were slowly breaking no matter how much you tried to stop it. He could see right through the so called smile you shot him this morning as soon as you saw him. He knew right then and there that something happened to you during the weekend and when he heard it was all about Yeonjun... he had to contain himself not to beat up his best friend or else the friendship he treasured dearly would crash, fall, and wouldn’t withstand.

However, the truth remained. Little by little, you were shattering due to Yeonjun’s actions and he could only watch helplessly as you flew freely to the ground. It was an understatement to say that he was starting to hate his best friend for doing this to you, but in the end he believed you. If you did it before, then you could do it again right? And you knew that Soobin was always right there for you no matter what.

Last month you gave it your all in order to move on. He truly admired that you kept running and running towards the future even if you felt that there was no end, a quality he secretly cherished of you. As a person, you were strong in your own way and Soobin was proud of you. He just didn’t know how to say it now without making the bright atmosphere droop. It was always like this whenever a problem with your relationship arose. He brought you closer to his arms.

“You’re not weak at all for crying, Y/N. I think you’ve been holding it for too long now. You’re always welcome to come to me, alright? I’ll save you from that stupid Yeonjun and make you happier than he ever has! You deserve someone much better. You and I both know this.”

He wiped your every tear which streamed against your cheek with his thumb gently, and somehow you finally smiled. Ardent, genuine, and sincere, your smile was enough to cause another one of his own towards you, a great deal of blinding happiness all around you. You were sure Soobin was waiting for this after a while, although it came out at a surprising time. You didn’t expect it either.

This was another feeling you couldn’t ever get enough of, for it reminded you of the time when Yeonjun asked you to be his... but comparing it to this wasn’t right at all.

No words were spoken between the two of you, but it really did mean a great deal of comfort to you. How could he offer up this ample amount of support towards you? You made a promise to yourself to make it up to him one day.

A few minutes later, you reluctantly pulled away from his sweet hug to check the time on your phone. You weren’t sure how long you’d been holding each other like this (and you really did enjoy it), but if you kept dawdling then you would miss every single afternoon class. Your eyes scanned through the upper numbers.

Crap. You already missed the first few minutes!

You scrambled to get yourself off him, pulling your bag over your shoulder in a haste. “Wait, I’ll tell you the details later!” You waved your hand for a flimsy goodbye, rushing to get every paper in your bags in check. It was a pathetic bye, that was for sure. You rushed out before Soobin could even mutter a bye, hoping to get there in good time so that you wouldn’t embarrass yourself in front of everyone. Oh, well. You’ll see him later.

Your footsteps faded away little by little and yet another set rippled through his ears through little clacks on the spotless floor. He wondered if you were coming back to ask him something but before he could turn around, sweet words that were due to a familiar tone made his heart stop in place.

“Please, take care of her for me.”

...

Upon hearing that voice Soobin halted in his tracks, looking back at a pair of warm, brown eyes that met his own. By the looks of it, he heard everything you said. Not to mention that it was the second time the boy eavesdropped at that.

“Soobin, please? You can date her even if it hurts but just please... if I can’t look after her, then who else’ll take her to her favorite restaurant?”

The pleas did not matter to him all the more, if he was being honest. This game was something he didn’t want to be involved in but looks like fate had its plans. It was obvious now. He hated this and although he said you deserved better, it was clear that the two of you were destined to be together.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

The door clamorously creaked as soon as you entered, making you cringe at the sudden but minimal heads that turned towards you. You shyly offered up a smile, reorganizing the books in your hands to pass off some of the attention somewhere else. Some of the people there were doing their own things and focused on talking to each other to an extent. You sighed gratefully. Thankfully you could sit alone at a spot where no one would notice you at the top of the row.

After you wondered where the rest of the students were and the professor whom you searched for in every direction, you gave up with a relieving drop of your shoulders and decided to sit down. Glancing at the time, you muttered how stupid you were under your breath for reading the clock wrong. You were fortunately five minutes earlier, but looks like you have to wait now until the lesson starts.

Getting situated in your spot was an easy thing and you toyed with your phone when you heard a shuffling of clothes sitting next to you on the right. It wasn’t such a good time to be socializing right now since you felt like crap but if you were going to make new friends, you might as well do so now. After all, college was supposed to be a good experience minus all the endless assignments and projects to prepare for your future.

You managed to steal a look at the person who sat right next to you but became paralyzed in your spot when you realized who it was, whipping your head where you wouldn’t be able to get distracted by him. That dazzling, blue hair was unmistakable. And the perfect, rosy lips were too! How could you not be tainted when he chose to sit next to you?! Seeing as the latter was impossible when you heard his deep voice murmur the words ‘good morning,’ a bead of sweat collected at your forehead. He was never this bold before after you broke up, and you pondered if he wanted to be good friends again after what happened. The audacity was unbelievable.

You couldn’t understand why he’d choose to be beside you when there were many more other open spots in the room. He must’ve been mocking you, making fun of you after how weak you looked a few days before.

The question was though, why the hell was he sitting right there?! Right next to you?! You could feel the words becoming stuck in your throat as you choked out a good morning back, too anxious to say anything or else it’d initiate a conversation between the two of you. That was the least thing you wanted to do as of now, wasting all your energy on the time spent convincing yourself he’d make up some small talk. That time however never came, and you were left politely smiling at the one and only Choi Yeonjun when you randomly found him staring at you.

The professor finally arrived, lifting off a heavy burden on your chest when you could’ve been dreading the lesson instead. You should’ve left before as to not create any conflict, but anymore absences and your future would’ve been as good as dead. Although you could look at the bright side now! Yeonjun wouldn’t be able to talk to you or else he’d miss some important things which would in turn affect his grades. You threw a grateful smile towards the center of the cavernous room, becoming a little bit relaxed even if some part of you was still freaking out he was that close to you.

The class was a blur, pointless information echoing throughout the room you didn’t care to learn since you were dozing off. Your mind was too busy looking back at the events that went down last weekend, becoming more tired with every second that passed. It was hard to get your brain off that addicting stuff called overthinking every single time you caught Yeonjun staring at you with tender, soft eyes. Simultaneously, you were hoping no one would call you out for daydreaming of what could’ve been, so you hid behind a tall person’s blonde head, hoping not to be caught.

Sadly, you were brought back to the room when a chorus of sighs collected together to make a violin whimper of disappointment.

“You will be working with the person beside you on the right,” the professor declared, clearing their throat while most of the class groaned altogether. Wait so that means...

In an instant, everything seemed way too overheated in the room now. Were you the only one feeling hot or what?! You knew fully what was supposed to come next since you were the only two sitting on the top, the rest of the bottom being filled out by tons of people who were tuning in to the lesson.

Sometimes life doesn’t work the way we want it to. That itself was obvious. Otherwise you’d be somewhere else being happy instead of working with this jerk!

You couldn’t help the frustration of curses you thought in your head, glaring at the boy who was giggling cutely to himself.

“Oh, looks like you’re paired up with me! I can’t wait to work with you, Y/N~” The tone of his voice made your heart skip a beat, the all too familiar teasing getting to your head. As you expected, whatever he said would have an effect on you, instantly making you heat up at how true that statement was.

Smiling, you gulped, feeling too parched all of a sudden. God only knows how much you wanted to get out of there right away. You were dying not to embarrass yourself, collecting your books together as you slathered a polite tone to your voice. Somehow you got the words out despite making clear eye contact with him way too long for your own good. It felt so wrong to say he was a masterpiece but it felt so right to keep looking at him like this.

“Where should we work?” Yeonjun asked once more.

He leaned closer to you, leaning on his hand as he maintained an direct, intent gaze. Your lips formed into a straight line, hopelessly wishing he wouldn’t see how much of a mess you were in front of him. Then he licked his lips. That was the end of you! He and you both knew that it was meant to be flirtatious. Your ears burned at the sight. Well that was enough to be looking at his eyes now! You foolishly turned away.

“Hmm, how about we meet at the bakery everyday at five? Are you okay with that?” Yeonjun suggested, raising an eyebrow to comprehend your unsure expression. You nodded your head acceptingly, albeit a bit defeated. He shouldn’t have been expecting anything. You were fine with whatever place you could meet up by, but didn’t he know that you weren’t fine working with him?!

After the quiet and easily awkward atmosphere, you turned on your heel getting up from the exhausting spot. It was much too uncomfortable for you to plan out a schedule with him, and second you weren’t able to catch the directions with him chatting it up a bunch.

Of course you wanted to be mature about the situation, but it was impossible for you. If it was another person, then you would’ve been fine. You could ask around but that itself was scary too. Your heart was in a tugging predicament with you in between, and you weren’t sure what to choose. Seems like Yeonjun was your only choice now. It would’ve helped you move on but with him right there, it would be harder to really think about yourself for once. You shot him one more look, hoping it would be the last.

“Yeonjun, don’t think you’re fooling me with this flirting. You know I can’t work with you after what you said. I’m sorry, but find someone else who’ll be open to being your partner.” You opted to get up from your seat, trying to dash away as quickly and quietly as possible until he said something that made you paralyzed as you got up.

“Y/N, please wait!”

Suddenly the world stopped and in it, you could only see the two of you with Yeonjun clinging gently to you.

He grabbed your arm before you could move to another seat, holding on tightly just to make you stay. You winced at how warm it was compared to your shaking arm, avoiding his vulnerable eyes due to embarrassment. You didn’t know how you were supposed to do this project anyway when you couldn’t even look at him in the first place.

“I know, and I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have done whatever we did while we were drunk and bothered you like that. Just... can you work with me this once? I want you to get a good grade with me.”

Gradually, his words became inaudible at the end, as if too ashamed to say it out loud. It was an understatement to say what he said was surprising. Therefore you couldn’t help but gasp at how vulnerable he got when you tried to move away from him when you thought he would’ve let you go after what happened. It was clearly too much for you to see his adorable puppy dog eyes, glistening and sparkling with sincerity when you safely decided to look back at him, feeling weak in the knees with uncertainty of what to say.

And although you wanted to say no so badly, you spoke without thinking and murmured something only he could hear.

“Okay then... Let’s do well.”

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Before you knew it, five pm rolled by and you were face-to-face at the bakery where Yeonjun was waiting for you. At this point, you were reluctant to go through with this since you could easily say you hadn’t found anyone to do the project with. But knowing that the teacher was stubborn and hardheaded when they made plans like these, it would be impossible to convince him to let you work alone. Plus, you actually got ready instead of throwing your favorite hoodie this time! You couldn’t let all your extra effort and special preparing to go to waste just because it was Yeonjun.

And gosh, you just had to remind yourself it was Yeonjun again.

The advances were simple. You had brought all your heavy books relating to the subject, hoping they’d be able to help but now all they seemed to do was weigh you down from getting the door. The wind was heartless, sending icy gusts through your clothes as you heaved out a sigh. It would’ve been good if you just left now instead. But this would only make matters worse. You swiped your phone again, purposely ignoring the contact name of ‘Stupid Mean Jerk Jjuniebug.’ He hadn’t texted you yet saying he was there so you hesitated a tiny bit before reaching for the golden door handle and eventually going inside.

The warm smell of cookies, cakes, and a variety of baked breads welcomed your nose, making the corners of your lips turn up with satisfaction. Out of all the distractions in the world, the Boulangerie was such a perfect place to go to do anything, really. If it wasn’t for your stupid project, you’d probably relax and enjoy a cup of your favorite drink paired with one of the delights they had here! It sounded like flawless idea. Happily, you made a mental memorandum in your head to plan out a day with Soobin where the two of you could hang out and tell stories to each other. He would definitely enjoy this place because of all of the bread you could order.

Surprisingly, Yeonjun was there already and you assumed he was writing something important down due to the determined expression on his face. He furrowed an eyebrow, slightly biting is lip while you inched towards him. You couldn’t help the smile that arose on your cheeks because of how endearing he looked as he worked hard, holding tightly to the books in your arms when you finally came close to him.

He looked up from his little notes of hearts and bunnies he was doodling as soon as a pair of shoes made unpretentious clitter-clacks, eyes lighting up with admiration when he realized that it was you standing there.

“I ordered your favorite dessert while waiting for you. Do you still like it?”

The words got stuck in your throat. He got you something? He must’ve been thinking of your arrival too attentively otherwise there’s no way that was true, but gosh did Yeonjun prove you wrong in a second.

Glancing at the sweets before you paired with a dainty teacup of your favorite drink, a gasp left your lips that embodied awe since he still remembered what you liked to order whenever you came to the Boulangerie with him. The snow white lace of the table fabric created flashbacks in your mind and you tensed up in realization. You hadn’t come here in two months- the last time you were able to picture your last date with him. Although, that wasn’t the point at all.

You were not to be expecting anything after the two of you separated even if the two of you were exes. It was just in Yeonjun’s moral codes in life to be kind to anybody and especially you whenever he please just because it was normal to him. You adored how pure he was, but at the same time you couldn’t shake how he acted towards you almost two months ago. That hostile expression on his face- one you’d never seen before- couldn’t ever be erased from your memory no matter how much effort you put in it.

But the past was the past. No bad things could happen like that now, could it? It was all because the two of you broke up. You were exes.

And yet, you could smile freely like nothing of the sort happened towards the two of you. After all, it was the right thing to do wasn’t it? Yeonjun would’ve wanted you to do that too, you knew it deep inside despite desiring to deny it. To move on and not have any feelings of pent up frustration and anger towards each other. Joy swelled in your heart at how much maturity you were gaining because of heartbreak. Maybe the two of you could be friends. Maybe.

“Thank you so much for doing this even if you didn’t have to, Yeonjun. I’m surprised you even came since your friends are much more interesting than me. I’m glad that you did though.”

You decided to take a bite in the delicacy, immediately not regretting the dulcet decision as you relished in the simple sweetness that came with it. Honestly, you missed this wonderful, mouth watering taste so much! Just like what you remembered, you shut your eyes in pure content, not being able to take in the sight of the boy in front of you who chuckled to himself.

Yeonjun heaved a breath of amusement from his chest, cheek laying down on his hand again as his eyes showed nothing but the sincere feeling of endearment towards you. He shifted comfortably on his side, grabbing one of the crimson, bright strawberries from his plate as he bit onto the juicy tip of it.

“You know, you’re always cute when you smile like that,” he whispered, not caring whether or not you heard it- which you obviously did.

You puffed your cheeks out at this.

“Shut up...! We’re here for a project, remember? Not to... flirt, silly.”

The mischievous yet saccharine grin on his face made you flustered and you glanced away from him, pretending to look at the tray of enclosed desserts that you saw when you first entered the bakery. You couldn’t allow yourself to become distracted like this! Not to mention that looking at him straight through doesn’t seem to help either!

“Oh, but when I look at you I can’t seem to focus on anything else. I’m being serious here; I just really can’t seem to take my eyes off you.”

The slamming yet gentle sound of you slamming the spoon you were holding on the table gave everything away and his eyes turned into euphoric crescents that only signaled delight.

“Yeonjun, I said shut your trap. All these cheesy compliments and I’ll... we have to do our project, so please cooperate and let’s put our work together to actually do something good.” You pulled your books together in a pile, acting as if you were really doing something in order to distract him from teasing you. The raging beat of your heart begged to differ, so you hoped he wouldn’t hear it or else that would give him another reason to make you flustered.  

“As you wish, princess. We’ll work so well together that you’ll miss me once I drop you home!”

Princess...?

He’ll drop you home...?

You groaned in annoyance at the nickname and offer although you kind of enjoyed it, wanting to smack Yeonjun in the mouth for not listening to your request. He must’ve been deaf or something because the whole time he kept throwing coy phrases you’d never heard before or trying to whine about how much work it all was for the two of you.

You were only starting to understand how annoying he was whenever he got cranky and dozed off for thirty minutes, leaving you to search through all those books and gather information yourself which was luckily a lot of help. It was a nice silence for a while but once he got back to annoying you endlessly, you swore you could rip all your hair off from the frustration building up from inside of you.

How were you going to do a week of working with him when you couldn’t even look at him in the eye every time he made pouty, kissing lips? Or take him seriously whenever he called you a pet name for that matter? You wished future you the best luck, unfortunately not knowing what would arrive in the times to come.

...

“Hey, could you look at this for a second? I’m having trouble if I should or more exactly- how I should put this down when it makes no sense.”

You laughed at how clueless he was when it came to his favorite subject, shuffling right beside him to see what he was struggling with. It was too natural, too suspicious for the both of you not to know this. You contained the snickers of mock once you put it all together, silently calling him stupid in your head for not being able to jot down this simple effortless thing. You twisted your body towards the notes, enough for your shoulders to meet together.

Little did you know that Yeonjun only wanted you to come close to him, and it was more than suffice to say it worked out in his favor.

You were explaining everything to him but the only thing he could focus on was the little things about you. The bitty, endearing gestures of your hands while you connected two of the subjects, the way your chest heaved up and down when you took a tiny breath of air, and even how your lips opened and closed was enough for Yeonjun’s fluffy cheeks to heat up and bloom into a rosy red. The words droned off as it echoed between the two of you, easily becoming pointless since he wasn’t paying attention anyway.

A couple of seconds passed between the two of you when the bakery suddenly became silent, and he gripped the pencil he dropped earlier on the table as you shot him a shy smile. Yeonjun’s knuckles became white with every second his stare lingered on you. You were way too cute for your own good, and you didn’t even know it- so why was he surprised? He, too, was hoping you wouldn’t be able to notice the aggressive thumping in his chest.

“Yeonjun? You got all of that, right?” Your symphony-like voice snapped him from out of his trance.

“Okay, then I’ll put that down,” he breathed tiredly.” It looks like he was getting exhausted too, huh? You were about to say a few words of encouragement until he cut you off with his own.

“We’re almost done researching; just hang in there, alright? You’ve been doing so well, Y/N.”

The gentle, supporting words was enough to send ripples through your heart and you nodded your head, all the while checking through what you noted and what you forgot. You wanted to keep thinking about what he said and how it motivated you to keep going. You didn’t want to upset you and most definitely not him. However, the fatigue coating your eyes was too much and you slowly closed the heavy lids, head slowly turning to the side before you fell on something all too familiar.

A sudden yet light weight on his shoulder made him look up from what he was writing down, stunning him in his spot when he saw you had fallen asleep on his shoulder. He must’ve known that this much thinking wore you out after such a long while. A tender smile decorated his lips and he took in your every feature, hoping to draw out the face that made him feel alive.

“She’s so cute...” He grabbed his jacket from the side he’d taken off earlier, laying it gently upon you with his other hand as if it was something he’d done since the beginning of time. You nuzzled your cheek against his way too comfortable shoulder, becoming more snug with each minute that passed by. He couldn’t help the skip in his heartbeat when you muttered his favorite nickname in your sleep, this ‘Jjuniebug’ being much more different compared to the past because he knew you were dreaming of him.

When such a sight like this was to be treasured by anyone, he decided he didn’t want to work anymore. Like the gentleman he was, he gathered your books together, pushing your plate to the side before laying his head against yours. He intertwined your hands with his, grinning gently from ear to ear at the warmness he felt from inside.

He stole one more glance at you, fingers delicately dancing from your cheekbone all the way to your chin, tracing your jaw as gingerly as he could. This was what he was hoping for after such a long time of not receiving it. That itself was rightfully so, yet having you near meant the world and so much more to him.

Then he glanced out the window where rain was drizzling, creating a dreading gray atmosphere which was nothing but chaos. It could’ve been something that alerted him on such a dreary day, making him anxious at how he was going to get home in a mess. But to him, he wouldn’t trade this peaceful present. Always, he wanted to be close to you like this. It couldn’t have been too much to ask, honestly.

“Tell me,” he said to no one in particular, “how can you make a moment last forever?”

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Tuesday passed as quickly as Monday did and you swiftly got prepared for five pm later. You were bouncing with excitement, ready to see the boy who’d been waiting for you over at the library, a place you decided together when he texted you during lunch break. To be true to yourself, you couldn’t wait to work with him. All day you were waiting for the horrid, slow hours to pass of lectures and countless assignments online, lingering silently through the minutes that seemed to go by forever in hopes that everything would go faster. The relief you felt when you were dismissed for the day and the joy that swelled in your heart when you went home, preparing yourself as best you could.

You didn’t understand why you were buzzing with energy over meeting someone like this, for wasn’t it true the two of you were exes? Two months ago you broke up; that was quite obvious. It didn’t help that and that number one: he was a jerk after a while of dating you, and number two: he was probably playing with your heart if you decided to be smart. But then again you always rewarded that guilty pleasure by saying the past was the past and he bought you your favorite delicacy. He may have hurt you before and because of that, you promised yourself you wouldn’t ever date him ever again.

With that thought in mind you threw your favorite outfit on that you planned just the night before, looking in the mirror twice just to make sure you looked okay. Deep down you knew it was a lie to say you weren’t doing these special things for him, trying to convince yourself that in doing so- this dressing up would do your ego a favor. Yeonjun didn’t have to see this, not at all! It was all because you wanted to look decent. Just that.

So sneakily, you crept out of the house while slipping your shoes on since nobody would notice you were gone. You checked your phone at least twice before opening the door, clearly not ready for the surprising sight your eyes landed upon as soon as you left home.

In front of you was the boy who had taken your mind captive all day, smiling from ear to ear as his fingers combed gently through his blue hair.

You gasped at how he actually came to your house after teasing yesterday that he would, but you never knew he’d carry out his plan. He would keep poking your cheek while saying something under his breath like how he’d visit you one day to pick you up. He would never do that, right? Well no, you were extremely wrong and just a day after your project date went well.

Nonetheless, you couldn’t stop the touched grin on your face to know he was waiting for you.

“Hey, Y/N,” he shyly giggled and that itself made your heart skip a beat, “let’s walk to the library together today, alright? Wait, let me take your books, please!”

Even with your protests and several no’s, he still took your books and placed it snugly against his left arm, teasing about how light they were together. You glared at him for a second before taking a few steps when he suddenly grabbed your hand.

You turned around, eyes wide in a daze.

“What is it?”

An overwhelming heat rose up to your cheeks and ears, making you feel hot in the face as you realized he was still holding on.

“If it isn’t too much to ask, can I hold your hand today? I really miss the warm feeling you gave me last summer.”

He held his hand out expectantly, waiting for you to take it on your own accord. You easily obliged- albeit a bit hesitantly- putting your hand against his and allowing him to guide you to wherever- whenever he wanted. The way his eyes lit up as he lead you to the place was precious, making you feel soft with endearment at how gentle he treated you.

Now this? This was bad. So, so bad.

On the day you left Yeonjun’s house in tears, you weren’t expecting any of this to happen. You weren’t sure how you could trust him so easily after everything he’s done- maybe it was the way you felt his sincerity in every smile he sent you or how tenderly he had grabbed your hand just now, but the happiness bottling up inside you did not lie. You felt pure jubilation whenever you saw him.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was Wednesday.

Wednesday, the middle of the school days where you desperately wanted to claw your eyes out from how tedious everything was. Wednesday, a day where nothing significant happened but nothing too horrible happened either. Wednesday, a reminder that you only had two days left- counting today and Thursday- to work with Yeonjun. You hated the bitter taste of having to really say goodbye, but the future had to be on the brighter side then. After this, you swore you wouldn’t ever see him and his damn handsome face for another accidental time.

Just about reaching four in the afternoon, you decided to go with Soobin over to the Boulangerie where you’d been promising yourself to take him since Monday. It was luck on your side today that you actually went out for some fresh air, carrying out some of the awaiting plans you had on your checklist. Sometimes it was nice to have a breather in the middle of the week when everything else was distracting.

It started off as usual, and you realized you hadn’t seen him since that very day of hearing Yeonjun’s offer to be your partner. To be quite honest, you didn’t really think about telling him since it shouldn’t be that important, but the boy knew it was important just by from the hesitance in your expressions. His fingers placed the glass filled with chocolate milk on the table gently and curiously prodded.

“Y/N? You’ve been acting strange lately; is everything okay?”

You glanced up from the china plate, eyes widening with surprise. You weren’t sure what he was talking about. It couldn’t have been anything important, could it? Or were you being so obvious about your giant, giant problem?

“Yeah, everything is fine, Bin! Trust me, there isn’t anything going wrong but I guess you could say that... from your perspective.”

You made sure to look at the way he reacted and seeing how his head titled with wonder, you chose to give it a try.

“Well... I should’ve called you about this but I’m working with Yeonjun for a project. We have to turn it in by Friday, but we’ve been doing stuff on it since Monday. It doesn’t mean anything though, and we’re supposed to meet up at the park (Moonlight) today.” You intentionally left out the fact he asked you and those sweet moments since you were afraid of his reaction.

You knew he was one to be respectful and kind no matter the person, although because of all this tugging back and forth between his best friends- you couldn’t blame him for wanting to sock either one of you for being so stupid. And stupid were you and Yeonjun for not being able to get enough of each other, at least that’s how you viewed it. Soobin wouldn’t dare to hurt either one of you since the two of you were best friends; physically wouldn’t cut it. You hoped he would just remain patient like he’d always have- one thing you were grateful for, obviously, instead of freaking out at the recent moments you’ve experienced.

That being said, the look on Soobin’s face was absolutely priceless once you told him about your predicament.

“You two? On a project? TOGETHER?!”

Glumly you nodded your head, expecting him to say something but his mouth was filled with shock to the brim that he couldn’t even bring himself to say anything.

“Yup, that’s true. You didn’t know about it?” To say the least, you were surprised he didn’t know about it since Yeonjun was one to trust him about everything. Little things like this would count, yes, and you could very vividly remember how he blabbed to Soobin when you first started dating about how to keep a girl on her period happy.

In response, he shook his head, hand still glued covering his mouth. Your lips slightly turned upwards at his melodramatic feedback.

“No, he didn’t tell me anything at all about it! Why are you guys keeping secrets from me?”

Ouch, that stung. But at the same time, what were you expecting?

“That’s a surprise. I thought he couldn’t keep his mouth--”

The deafening, shuffling sound of the store bell rang throughout your ears, causing you to shudder at the intermittent sound. This was a popular Boulangerie so you didn’t need to be surprised whenever a new customer came in, but it stunned you at the worst times. You shrugged at Soobin’s suddenly ghost white reaction, thinking he was just kidding with you again and went back to the cup of a refreshing drink. Honestly, you couldn’t care less about it unless it was someone you knew.

You lifted the cup to pass through your lips until the familiar sight of messy radiant, blue hair caught the peripheral vision of your eye.

It had to be him. It couldn’t be anyone else.

“Y-Yeonjun...?”

As your heart dropped to your stomach, your voice broke out gently, making you the only person to hear it muffled with both distress and disbelief. There was no possible way you were witnessing what was happening in front of you. You didn’t want to believe it, squinting your eyes over and over again just to get a good look. It was still him no matter what you did, no matter what you changed.

Somehow, he didn’t notice you.

He sat down at a table, sending a sugary smile towards an alluring girl who sent him the same one back. Your back became rigid at the too close proximity of their faces. They chatted for a little bit about anything that could cross their minds, obviously flirting with the stares sent back and forth and back again until it turned into a full discussion- both of them laughing their hearts out. Happiness from the ideal ‘couple’ (as anyone could’ve mistaken them) spread around the Boulangerie contagiously, making everyone awe at the sight of them fully enjoying themselves. But you? You? Your heart shattered piece by piece while watching this play out.

Too many questions flooded in your mind at once as well as too many insecurities, paralyzing you in your spot as you couldn’t find the correct way to breathe again. It was getting too hard to find the air in, you realized. Soobin called your name out many times- to get you to listen, to get you out of your stupid trance, to get you to do anything else in the world but look because it’d hurt you just as much as it did for him!

To this, you were only sitting still, staring and staring like a dormant painting hanging in a museum just to find out that you wouldn’t ever be able to change anything, but only see the people in front of you. You didn’t want to look at the face of pain in front of you but... if you looked away then something else might happen.

You cradled yourself in your arms, trying to stop the icy cold breeze that whirled pass your rips and over to the tips of your toes. It didn’t make sense to you. Why even bother putting effort into winning him back? You wouldn’t be able to be as good enough. You shouldn’t have even tried in the first place.

You gulped down those insecurities again, trying to calm your shaking hands.

It wasn’t possible to be that perfect... not at all. She was such a stunning girl, the epitome of everything you weren’t and what you didn’t have. She had such sparkling eyes, such a gorgeous smile, and not to mention an impeccable complexion that had every single girl in the world jealous. Everything about her was simply perfect and that drowned your own specialties into the deepest ocean called hatred.

Once again you glanced at Yeonjun who seemed to be having fun with the deep chuckles and smiles he was freely giving up. Oh, how bad you wanted it to be you but this reminder was one that gave you a wake up call. You never really had a chance in the first place.

He then turned his head a little to the side, ultimately being able to see you sitting next to Soobin just like you had planned. His honeyed brown eyes changed from smug into something unreadable you couldn’t put your finger on before changing in a split second to look back at the girl.

The decision dawned on you, and you clenched your fists until you felt flashing, white pain run through your fingers.

He didn’t even care.

You were stupid enough to believe he actually liked you back again. You were stupid enough to think that with all these sweet interactions and words, he was warming up to you for another countless time. You were stupid to think he was being truthful that drunken night, saying he needed you clearly as much as you needed him. Finally, you were stupid enough to think he loved you. Now the proof was smack dab in your face, blinding you from your goal of hating him, and you were such a fool to be thinking he would really be yours after such a long while.

The glossy tears gathered in your eyes, angry, frustrated but pointless words with no explanation becoming more stuck in your throat when you glanced once more at the sight across from you. Time passed by through the regal clock, ringing in an ear and out the other. One way or another, you needed to get out of there and you needed it to be now.

You hastily slung your bag filled with papers over your shoulders, making sure you hid the flowing tears from everyone’s sight. Just one turn and he’d probably see you so pitiful at the wrong time. You certainly didn’t want to look pathetic, especially not in front of Yeonjun, whom you still loved with all your heart.

In a dash, you aggressively swiped the entrance of the door handle and into the day where you just wanted to disappear. Bell ringing haphazardly behind you, you weren’t able to perceive you were out of the bakery until another customer ignored your everblooming sadness, struggling behind you to get the door. Tears soon fell on the ground after holding them in for too long, signaling your vulnerability as you crouched down behind the bakery to let everything keeping your heart captive out. This time, for real, you really weren’t going to see him again even if it meant your grades being obliterated.

You hated him. You hated him so much for what he did back there.

And yet here you were, running away from your problems again.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

“Y/N?”

It was a mistake. It was all a mistake. You shouldn’t have pressed accept without looking at the contact name. You were just so stupid that it was funny. Just another one of the reasons why he wouldn’t ever want to date you again. How could you blame him for breaking up with you?

“Y/N, you there?”

He was seeing another girl, you should’ve known. Why didn’t you know? Why did you have to be such a fool to be used in the first place? And why the hell were you sad about it when you could be using this opportunity to be getting over him?!

“Y/N, you’re not responding and I’m getting worried. Is there something I can do? Please...?”

You were just exes. Exes, for crying out loud! Exes. That’s all.

“Y/N, if you’re there just-”

“yeah, I’m right here,” you murmured quietly, caring any less that he might have not heard you in the end. If he was able to really see how you accidentally looked at him earlier, then surely he would’ve known how the world crashed on your shoulders just by looking at you. Oh, but it was funny wasn’t it? It didn’t matter anyway. After all, he wouldn’t give a damn right? Not what he did back there he wouldn’t.

Because of that, you realized that this conversation with him was not needed. Whether it was because of the project or if it was for a favor, you wouldn’t be able to do it without looking weak in his eyes. Your finger hovered over the red button, tempted to press hang up until again, his act of using a concerned voice tugged painfully on your heart strings.

“Wait, are you okay? Do you need me to be there? Something’s wrong, I know you’re not okay,” he tried for another time, breathing through the call tiredly as if he was oblivious to what went on earlier. The hate for him smoldered in your chest, and your fingers tightened around the phone so arduously that they turned white, shaking hysterically.

“No, I...” you felt your voice break, and you covered the change in pitch by clearing your throat. With the lump so gigantic that you couldn’t even breathe, it hurt to tell him a lie, much less speak at that moment. You put on a tone to make it more believable. “Everything’s fine. Just busy right now.”

“You’re lying,” he whispered so softly into the receiver you were wondering yourself if you had heard him in the first place. You forced yourself to laugh at his statement, but it came naturally, knowing it was all too true.

“I’m not lying, I promise! I just took a nap, that’s all. No need to be so worked up over me.” You figured that teasing him would be the best way to cover up your sorrow, giggling alongside him because you were so bad at lying. Nonetheless, you hoped he would take this approach, waiting silently on the floor for his best answer.

On the other side he hummed hesitantly, mumbling a few words that you couldn’t quite comprehend because you knew he didn’t want to hear them. You barely noticed you were in the corner holding yourself, rocking back and forth as the anticipation of just hanging up crept up on you.

Before you could start, Yeonjun grumbled in concern.

“Well... okay then. But if you really want to convince me you’re fine then you’ll keep your promise and meet at Moonlight today. We still have a lot to do, so let’s meet up at the usual time. You’ll be there, right?”

“Um... I...”

What else could you say? It would be rude to decline and you weren’t in the mood to lie after all that. Well, he didn’t buy it all but at least he got off the topic. You were thankful to him for not budging, although this had to be one of the worst things he could ever suggest. Not only about how you feel in the end but about the project too. As far as you were concerned, you only a little left so you were able to work separately anyway. He didn’t have to go so far to do things his way, but this would show you he didn’t need you at all.

You spoke on impulse hastily after the long, deafening silence.

“Yeah, okay. S-see you then.”

Abruptly, you hung up before the tears could start again. Not even letting him throw in a sincere goodbye to your predicament.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Just like what you remembered, Moonlight was still a breathtaking place where the golden sun shone during the day and the moon peeked out from the dim curtains of nighttime. You sighed, staring longingly at the beautiful scenery before you and sat down under one of the trees. It’d been so long since you chose to come here, especially by yourself this time. There were happy memories that came along with this place and you didn’t want to think about the bad ones, of course. However everywhere you looked, it would only remind you of him and that was the least thing you wanted to have at the back of your mind right now.

Checking the time, you made sure you didn’t arrive too early or too late. It was a few minutes after five and true to your word, you actually came. You were surprised at yourself for showing up voluntarily with your mind in such a bad condition, acting as if you were okay just for a stupid project. If you’d done this earlier, you would’ve definitely said no. Perhaps it was the way he was worried about you- although, you thought it was fishy- that you wanted to come. Maybe then you would’ve gotten the attention you wanted after all this time, with this being the final time you’ll see him.

Eventually, you saw the familiar blue haired boy arrive just a quarter after your planned time. He was panting heavily and you swore you almost felt bad for him until the image of him catching eyes with you from earlier rearranged your thought process by miles. You stood up expectantly as he ran over to you, planting his hands on his knees in order to regain breath.

“So sorry for being late, Y/N,” he choked out restlessly, taking your hands into his as an apology. He held them tightly in place, squeezing in an attempt to excuse himself for why he was late. Instantly you gasped at the contact, slowly pulling away so that he wouldn’t realize that you more or less hated his affection. At times when you’d be melting at this, you failed to realize that your suspicions were true and he was playing you behind your back.

A tight lipped smile that screamed passive-aggressiveness became of your lips and you were eager to take a few steps away from him, shuffling to get under the spot you sat earlier. You backed away a little bit but weren’t able to get far because your shoes slipped from something shaped like a square underneath you. The breath was knocked off your lungs as you fell towards the ground and you plunged back, waiting to hit the ground. That is, until someone caught you by the waist.

You opened your eyes after a few seconds of waiting and as soon as you did... you felt all the blood rush up into your face.

“Y-Yeonjun...”

You weren’t expecting anything like this. Nothing sweet like this at all! Said boy was intently gazing at you, holding you by the waist as you were too shocked to say or hell- even do anything with him this close. Your head tilted away to the side this time, trying to think of anything else that would stop the intermittent pace of your heart beats. Gossiping with Soobin about what happened just now, the way you fell at school a few years earlier and embarrassed yourself and how he helped you up out of everyone else right after, the first moment you laid eyes on him and met the blue haired boy just like that... But no, all you could think of was him, him, and only him!

He seemed to be getting a kick out of this, teasing you with an adorable smile that had you awestruck.

“Were you scared...? Don’t worry about it anymore; I’ll always be here to catch you when you fall, I promise.”

It was then that he started to lean in after chuckling at your shyness, bringing your face closer to his as his eyes ran across yours. Your breath quickened just by looking back at him turn towards you- his gorgeous eyelashes that you felt the need to count each, his nose that was sculpted by the angels, his cherry blossom pink lips you so desperately needed- memorizing every valley on his face as you had done earlier when the two of you dated. Oh wait, dated...?

In a moment, you flung yourself off him. What were you doing with him?! Whatever this was and whatever he was doing- it wasn’t right! It just wasn’t right... It wasn’t right when he was choosing to see someone else, and that girl back there no matter how much you couldn’t help but despise her- did not deserve it. It wasn’t right.

Your legs felt like jelly, unable to stand by yourself as you carried out an attempt to get away from him. It didn’t seem so long ago that you couldn’t get enough of him but now you were itching to be left alone. You wanted to deal with this yourself, not reignite the fire of the hopes that he would return back. He lost that chance and you lost the chance of loving him again- even if yes, you still did love him. It was enough for you anyway- the love he gave you before only serving as a unreachable memory. You realized you needed to relinquish him.

Immediately you pushed him off you, watching the sweet expression on his face bend into something broken. The distance between you became even farther and farther with every breath your chest heaved. You gulped.

“I’m fine. Let’s just get to work so we can finish this,” you deadpanned, bringing your books that used to be laying dormant on the green grassland against your chest, moving under the tree where he broke up with you. This way you would be able to remind yourself that it wasn’t meant to be.

Surprised by your ill nature, Yeonjun nodded carefully, deciding to ponder in his head what was making you act this way instead of asking more questions. There was obviously something wrong, but he didn’t want to bother you more. To him he was unable to think of what he had done wrong and certainly hated the tense atmosphere when you refused to touch him, much less look at him. He just went along with it unknowingly like a fool that it was because of him the whole time.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was too hard to concentrate.

Your eyes searched despondently over the materials over and over and over again to write down something- anything that could possibly benefit the project, but it didn’t help at all that your mind was still on the boy sitting in front of you. Like a mantra, the memories of him smiling with that flawless girl kept replaying in your head as many more times as you bit by bit became insane with wrenching love.

Again, you couldn’t help but steal another glance at him before quickly ducking back down so he wouldn’t be able to catch you staring. He looked so peaceful while retracing his steps in the books, laying on his hand as a stand for his cheek. You hated how he could act so fine while you were left with nothing but hate towards him. Could you even call it hate anyway? It wasn’t true at all.

Yeonjun’s soothing voice snapped you out from your daze of pity, but it did the least to heal you and your pathetic attitude.

“Hey, do you think we could rest a second? I might fall asleep here if we have to keep reading about this nonsense stuff.”

You didn’t look up from your book, allowing him easy access to rest on your shoulder as silently as he could. His heart leaped with joy in his chest, but there was no chance he’d ever say it out loud. He graciously laid his head down upon it, becoming enamoured with your scent as he reached out to touch your hand. This need of affection easily leveled the desire which screamed out he needed you, but he wasn’t sure if he’d ever get an opportunity to be yours again.

You, on the other hand, was dying to tell him you loved him- but it wasn’t right when he simply had the same love as you for another girl.

But at the same time, you wanted to be strong. You had to be strong in order to convince him you were doing fine without him even if the truth was far from that. You had to put on a mask to hide the pain you were going through just because of him and his stupid, contagious smile that makes you grin every time you see it. You had to be strong, otherwise you’d never fool him that you needed him more than anything or anybody you’ve ever wanted. You had to be strong... but why were all your actions simply betrayed you no matter what you did?

“Get off me.”

Your shoulders started to shake aimlessly, shuddering when you felt his head bury more into the crook of your skin. He must’ve not heard anything, and you clenched your jaw until it twitched with pain.

“I said, get off me!”

As hard as you could, you pushed him off you- enough that you were just inches apart from him. It didn’t compare to the distance between you that you came to note before.

The tears were hot against your cheeks and you collapsed into your shaking hands, unable to hold it in anymore. In all your life, you’ve never felt so humiliated before just because a boy lied to you willingly. You felt pathetic.

To say the least, Yeonjun was taken aback, his eyes wide with shock as he hopelessly reached out his hand to you. All the love you bore just for him crashed into waves upon your chest, and you slapped his fingers away harshly before he could even say something.

Miserably you hid your face from him, not allowing him to see such a mess that he caused by his own hands.

“Who even are you? Are you the Choi Yeonjun who broke up with me or are you someone else?! I don’t understand how you can act like this after everything that happened... tell me, are you just playing with me or something?”

“Y/N, that’s not what I meant to do...” he tried tiredly, scooting closer to no avail as you turned your back away from him.

You laughed at his words, still not being able to look at him straight in the eye.

“Not what you meant to do? You’re telling me that it’s not what you meant to do?! Then who- who was she? Because it seemed to me that you were happier with her than you could’ve ever been with me!”

The silence that broke you apart was too deafening as you caught another look at him.

“Y/N, that’s not true... just listen, please,” Yeonjun begged, gazing at you desperately with unreadable but melancholy expression that had you on edge. He knew that you wouldn’t stay if he physically bound you in his embrace, but he had no clue what to do or what to say. He just wanted- no, needed you to really live.

Your heart broke all the more at the words he tried to pick up in order to explain- which you were sure he could hear even if he seemed very far. Easily you trashed his attempt away, getting up from your spot since you didn’t want to hear anything- anymore lies that would hurt the person you tried so hard to protect and shield away from the inevitable demise of love... that was you.

Yeonjun hurriedly got up along with you, leaving the pile of your books abandoned on the floor as he rushed out to match your pace. He ran with all his might to catch up with you but every time he reached your side- you would push him away like earlier and he didn’t have time to find his breath.

“Yeonjun, leave her alone. Haven’t you done enough, already?”

Seconds later upon hearing another voice, you rushed to someone else’s side, hoping that he would be able to protect you from the danger. It was pitiful with you standing right behind him as if that would help, but it did more than what you could ever be grateful for.

Yeonjun tensed up at his spot, stunned to see Soobin when he could’ve sworn nobody else was at Moonlight. In his mind, he could see the two of you right there apart from everything else- the two friends that looked so good together... it had to be much better than him after what he’d done. He came to a thought, letting his guard down while words of Soobin asking too many questions towards you occupied his head.

“I knew it. I knew you two were dating. I-I should’ve known,” he mumbled under his breath, his morals paralyzing him in place as he dropped his gaze towards at the ground instead.

Somehow Soobin heard this muttering and smugly smirked at this silly situation, taking a fresh opportunity that could probably boost destiny’s way before hiding it with a deep frown. He pulled you flush against his chest, holding you when you surprisingly really needed it from someone else.

“You finally figured this out? Leave us alone; you lost your chance the minute you broke up with her, pal.”

As Soobin dragged you along, you took one last look towards Yeonjun and gasped when you saw along with yours- two longing eyes flowing with tears that were nothing short of love. You wanted to reach out to help him not to cry like that even if he hurt you, but it would never work out and he’d leave you just like he’d done before. This only showed that you weren’t meant to be, never in a million years.  

And with that you left with the help of Soobin, leaving Yeonjun alone at Moonlight. Time passed to the point where he gazed upon the stars- wishing that you would come back because he wanted to say he still loved you- by himself.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

It was Thursday, the final day where the two of you would ultimately finish this project. The death of having an obligation which ripped your heart out, for better or for worse. The demise of whatever love you shared. The end of seeing him because you really wanted- no, you needed to. Everything was over in a blink of an eye and you were left feeling bittersweet about the situation... more bitter compared to sweet because you wanted more time with him. You knew deep down inside it wasn’t too much to ask, but... ending this would be for the better. It must be.

You were on your usual pathway home from the library after trying to bribe the librarian to excuse you from losing your books (when you actually accidentally left it there with him) while along the way thinking about what to do to make a grand finish for the project. Since the two of you worked on it a lot for a few hours before you exploded on him- something you weren’t sorry for in the least bit because it got your feelings out- it was safe to say that he wouldn’t bother you about it anymore. He finished his side, you were assuming, so he didn’t have to see you for the time being unless he ever decided to talk it out with you. Other than the fact that you totally hurt him back there, it honestly served you a great victory on a silver platter as you waited for the dragged out day to be over.

It was petty, of course it was! But after what he did back there at the Boulangerie while not to mention, make eye contact with you- sweet revenge had to be one of the best tastes a connoisseur could ever call upon.

And the project? Oh yeah, that’s right. It was a good thing that it was the final day so you wouldn’t have to act civil with him, for better or for worse.

After a few more blocks finally, you made it home, causing you to sigh out in relief. Hurriedly you grabbed your keys from your purse, fumbling with several of them to find the one that fit perfectly. The familiar touch never came though, and you groaned loudly, cursing yourself in your head for forgetting it in the library. It was when you set it down next to the book you were reading before you confronted the librarian- poor old woman- and somehow, you forgot to pick it up the second you got up.

Great, now this.

You opted to stare at the horizon in front of you, letting the breeze freely cool down your body. The sight was nothing less than pretty. It was a windy, golden sunny day outside but you didn’t want anything to do with it. All day you were planning to mope around the house and watch your favorite shows, procrastinating ‘til the last minute until the due date of every assignment arrived. They hit differently whenever you grabbed a bag of chips downstairs to finish them along with the homework, and you giggled at every moment that flashed in your head.

There was nothing else better to do but call Soobin, right? Although you didn’t want to bother him because these months have definitely been annoying for him whether he said it or not.

Defeated, you then stared down into the white porch as if it was at fault, feeling fear rise up your throat. What were you going to do? There was no one else you had given the key to, except...

“Y/N? Can we talk?”

Oh, no. Oh, no... Oh no no no!

When you heard that voice you were instantly glued to that spot, feet affixed on the porch as your heart beat too fast for its own good. Your mind must’ve been hallucinating and playing tricks on you; clearly you weren’t ready to see him yet!

Swiftly you moved your head to the side, eyes widening with appall to see that he was actually right there. Expression nothing less than sorrow, hair messed up and fluffy right in front of his eyes, cherry blossom lips curved into a trembling frown: it was Yeonjun, alright, but yet it was someone you couldn’t recognize due to the complete change of attitude in him. He was tightly holding onto your books but seemingly refusing to hand them over as if that would do anything better and increase the need for conversation. Unlike his stiff posture, his eyes held firm intent though, and you quivered at the determination sewn in them.

“Do you need anything?”

Instead of acting childish like you played out in your head, you simply responded it a curt voice because it was better than saying nothing and benefiting the sworn silence. More than anything you wanted to get out of there and leave the awkward tension, but there was nothing else you could possibly do without embarrassing yourself due to the fact you lost your keys.

“I... I...” This time, he avoided your eyes, words caught in his throat as he couldn’t find the exact thing to say. It wouldn’t make things any better, you realized. It just wasn’t meant to be.

You pursed your lips, locking them into a line. Whatever he had to say- it didn’t matter. Plus, there was another thing. As your eyes were already tearing up, it would be hard to stay for long to listen to his words. There was no telling what you’d say if tears automatically streamed down your cheeks.

“If you don’t have anything to say, then I’ll l-leave. We can just work on the project separa-”

Clack!

Clack!

Clack!

Before you could even stay true to your words, Yeonjun took slow steps towards you that had you walking backwards... without you looking.

Soon enough your back hit the door, and you gasped at the close proximity between the two of you now as he leaned in. His hands reached out to cage you in between his arms, tilting his head to the side to study your reaction. The soft blue hair brushed against the top of your head- showing how dangerously close he was. His breath fanned across your lips and his heavenly cologne infiltrated your sense of smell. If he decided to torture you even more, then you’d be able to touch noses from how near he was.

Look, you weren’t sure how to describe it at that moment other than- he was pinning you to the damn wall?! Suddenly you felt all the blood rush in your face, and it was then that you couldn’t make eye contact with him anymore- especially because he’d see how embarrassed you were! He didn’t have to be that close!

“yes, I need something. Or more specifically, you.”

His voice was much more huskier than you remembered it to be, and his eyes fell upon yours, begging for you to look back if not for your anxiety that he was this close. You immediately shut your eyes, heart beating erratically in your chest even if you tried to stop it by focusing on something else. But Yeonjun... how could you not think of anything else but him?! He was nothing short of breathtaking but seeing him this close and personal... it didn’t do good things for your heart!

“M-me?”

It was obvious that the boy was amused even if he felt guilty about the problem, making a quick exhale through his nose to show entertainment. His chuckle that came heartily through his chest caused your ears to heat up with shame since it showed how weak you were- just for him.

“Yes you, you silly baby,” he cooed endearingly, “who else could it be?”

“You’re one to be calling me silly! Don’t pretend like you were the one the other day who asked if frogs have blood!”

In a split second, his face morphed into something nothing less than serious and his left arm dropped to his side. You couldn’t help but wonder at the duality he managed to have when the gravity of the situation hit him.

“I miss things like this. I miss it so much. I miss joking around with you and chasing you around the house just to tickle you. I miss how attached you were because little did you know, I was just as much attached to you as you were to me.

“I miss the sweet look you give me every time I ask you out on a date. I miss having you right beside me whenever we studied together because you were the only person who cheered me on even when it was two in the morning. I miss giving you random kisses out of nowhere because I can’t get enough of you and that adorable, surprised face whenever I did so.

“I miss slipping my hand into yours whenever we would walk home together, letting you cling onto me so that I could protect you from all dangers. I miss giving you victory every argument we had because I hate making you cry. I miss cuddling you on the couch as we watched our favorite shows together whenever we were too lazy to get up and how I couldn’t stop smiling every time you laughed.

“I miss kissing the top of your forehead and you never knew because you were asleep. I miss waking up with you by my side and seeing something so gorgeous it would stay in my head all day even if I studied the same materials over and over again. I miss looking up at the stars with you at Moonlight and resting my head on your lap as you ran your fingers through my hair and how we’d do it every single week.

“Can’t you see? I miss you and every little thing you do, simple or exquisite. I know why you acted that way yesterday and I hate myself so much for not realizing it until later. I owed her something after she told me a way to somehow get closer to you when I’d done such a horrible thing. You can love Soobin- I don’t care about myself anymore as long I get to see my favorite girl smile due to the fact that she’s in love.

“Y/N, you mean much more to me than anything and it’s okay if you’re happy not loving me again because at least I got to experience the full joy and sadness that visited along with the love of my life. This may be the last time you may ever want to see me, but please... let me tell you how much I need you one last time.”

His eyes were shining, full of sincerity that you were able to feel even if you weren’t him. Tears resembling glistening pearls streamed down with his cheeks as he finally told you the truth he’d been dying to tell you, allowing you to see his vulnerabilities inside out. And yet, he was genuinely smiling as he confessed this, happy enough he got the chance to tell you loved you one last time.

Gradually he extended his arms out wide, allowing you to have your personal space while he took a few steps backwards and towards the grass where you followed him. By the end of it all, you weren’t able to help the tears welling up in your eyes at how touched you were from the inside. It was him, the boy who promised to love you until the end of time.

“Y-Yeonjun, I...” he cut in through your words, closing his eyes in fear of the pain that would soon become of his body if you did in the end, choose to grant his wish. It simply wasn’t enough to level the agony of his heart, but he was willing to take all the pain instead of burdening it on you.

“I’ll let you push me. I’ll let you hit me. I’ll let you get back what you deserve. You can slap me, as long as you let everything out. I don’t want you to hurt anymore because of me, so just do it!”

...

...

...

Silence.

Oh, the euphoric relief coursing in your veins that really pushed you over the edge.

Immediately you threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him as tightly as you could because you never wanted to let go. You melted into his embrace upon contact, burying your head against his chest that was warm and overflowing with passion. Yeonjun hesitantly embraced you back, unsure of what happened just now.

You couldn’t help but giggle at his dumbfound expression.

“You silly baby,” you teased, repeating his playful words from earlier, “I’m not dating Soobin and I never have. Why would I date him when I’ll never love this way again?”

You booped his nose as quickly as you could, smiling when he finally reciprocated the same grin back.

“Choi Yeonjun, you were such a fool to lose me, but I’m even more of a fool to love you again. I’ve never stopped loving you, although I’m sure you already knew that, hEY-”

With happiness overflowing the boy, he picked you up and you were swept off your feet in a second. Wide smiles reflected back and forth from his face to yours as he spun you around him a few inches from the ground, pure bliss surrounding the two of you since you both were complete again. He let you laugh in his hands, tickling your sides unintentionally while you snickered at him to let you down. He only chuckled at this, stopping in place but still refusing to listen to your request.

“I love your very big brain that’s so smart it makes me frustrated with how dumb I am sometimes,” he brought you down a little bit to kiss your forehead. He then trailed down to your nose.

“I love how you ask me for opinions of perfume when you know deep down instead I adore your natural scent instead,” he kissed your nose and you laughed at the feeling it naturally gave you.

“But most importantly,” Yeonjun placed you down on the golden grasslands again and ceased right in front of your lips, letting his breath fall upon them, “I love you.”

Then he connected your lips together, bringing you closer towards him than he had ever done before.

At last, everything was finally perfect.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

Posted: 3/29/21- 1:37am (yes i did stay up halfway to two am just to get this finished. priorities people- it’s just a sweet early monday here 😔🧍)

Tags:

[dangan-imagine-plus]

Hello! Could you please do something for Fuyuhiko, Gundham, Kokichi and Shuichi? Getting protective/defensive over a shy and timid fem reader. Thank you!

warnings: Swearing and mentions of being hit on by people unconsenually.

First imagine on this blog! Hope you like it! Sorry it took so long, accidentally got distracted 😅. I’m also sorry but for not doing Shuichi but I couldn’t imagine him being that assertive, however you can send it back in with only Shuichi and maybe one of the other mods will do it. -Mod Ouma 💜

Fuyuhiko Kuzuruya 

You and Fuyuhiko are an interesting match-up: a quiet shy girl and a loud angry yakuza, needless to say people were surprised by your relationship, but you two were happy so no one really made any comments, especially because this is Fuyuhiko we’re talking about.

Fuyuhiko honestly tries to keep you away from everything that could frighten you or hurt you in any way. Enlisting Peko when he couldn’t be around or when both of them were busy, getting his most trusted bodyguard to look after you. He loves you more than he could ever admit to your face but he shows that in protection and his own special way.

Today you guys went to a new amusement park that showed up for an event, -you had to beg Fuyuhiko to go- and you saw a stuffed animal that you just HAD to have. So as the strong boyfriend he was, he decided he would win it for you.

This particular day Fuyuhiko didn’t employ bodyguards to look over you because, “I’m the ultimate yakuza damnit and I’ll be damned if I can’t protect you myself.” Just one problem, some creepy man had noticed you and started commenting on your looks when Fuyuhiko was busy.

The vendor had handed your boyfriend the plush and he turned around, the sight that greeted him, filling him with anger. You being almost cornered by this guy, looking obviously highly uncomfortable but too timid to reject most of his advances.

What really pushed him over the edge is the man's hand on your arm, while he said a sexual pickup line.

“OI! DIPSHIT! Get Your Fucking Hand OFF OF HER!!!” This boy is pissed. The man just bent down and retorted “Didn’t you ever learn to respect your elders little boy?”

Fuyuhiko while fuming, kicked the man in one of his kneecaps then as the man fell to the ground he grabbed your arm putting you behind him (despite your height). He got out his phone and made a call, almost instantaneously Peko arrived and you two walked out of the festival.

“Fucking hell, The Fucking Audacity Of Some Dickheads!!!” Needs you to calm him down, hold his arm, too angry for an actual hug.

Gundham Tanaka 

Gundham isn’t afraid to challenge someone or speak up, so whenever you need it he’s there. Additionally with his mindset, Gundham genuinely believes that you two are royalty to the dark world and he will do anything to protect his queen, whether that includes speaking for you, help build confidence or keeping you as safe and protected as a royal should be without overwhelming you too much. 

You personally weren’t an ultimate but that doesn’t mean Tanaka would treat you any differently, he actually found it quite nice, usually his class would be in all types of trouble, so being able to be with someone who is naturally calm and doesn’t cause much a ruckus is perfect for him, and he loves to relax with you, especially after a long day.

Gundham once warmed up, likes talking about his problems and what happened that day. That means you always have an interesting story which always interests you, but listening to these stories makes you want to experience them. Asking Gundham to accompany him to school one day was easy but the convincing was a little harder as he knew that you might get hurt or have something happen to you so naturally he was apprehensive.

“My dark queen, the mortal class I reside in is not one that fits the requirements for your godly presence. It will be worse than the 4th layer of hell, I shall not taint your beauty with mortal ignorance.”

However after enough reassurance he eventually let you come with him, of course checking with hope’s peak first. As you know though, Hope's peak will do anything to further the students talents so if you help him do that, then they will let you there any day. 

When you first got there, all the girls gawked over you and asked how Gundham got someone so level headed and pretty, a little jealousy from Sonia, but she seemed to get over it pretty quickly. Gundham had to pull you away from the crowd before you got too overwhelmed however and the problem started with the perverts.

“Bonjour sweet cupcake, would you like to take a dip in my fros-” Teruteru gets punched in the face as he tries to flirt with you by Hiyoko. “You’re hotter than a malfunctioning engine.” Soda pipes in before Gundham pulls you away from them both towards the door.

 “If you mere mortals cannot respect my lady then we shall vacate the filthy premises.” He stops, lets go of your hand and gets real close to the two boys “If I shall witness thee talk about the queen of darkness again, my twelve zodiac generals will teach you fowl perverts a great lesson about respect.”

Kokichi Ouma 

A shy and timid S/O, oh you mean a perfect teasing buddy. Seriously he will do lots for the sole purpose of making you flustered, however he’s the only one allowed to do so. If anyone (namely Miu) tries to do anything like that ooh boy will it be a messy situation. Lots of insults and bad (like mentally hurting) pranks thrown their way. 

However if you are in a relationship with this man, especially if he trusts you, he will protect you, lie for you, talk for you and really do anything for you. Lets be honest here, no one really expected you two to be together, with all the flirting with Saihara most if not all just assumed he was gay. That paired with your personality really shocked everyone, it just didn't seem very likely.

He tried to keep your relationship private because of multiple factors whether that be safety from the danger of the organization, because he most likely has enemies. Personal image, not that that matters more than you, but as the ultimate supreme leader he can’t be seen as weak or soft. Kokichi also didn’t want to be put in a position where he had to choose you or something else, so be patient, a relationship with Kokichi isn’t going to be easy. That’s why he loves you even more, because you still stay with him despite all this.

(Sorry got off track there)

 Nonetheless it got out and people knew now. Kokichi likes PDA, mostly for showing everyone who you “belong” to, since they know of your relationship. God forbid someone flirt with you, Kokichi gets really mad at the person and though he doesn't show it too much, he will insult and mess with the person so much mentally, it’s not fun at all.

This showed especially one day when you were at lunch waiting for Kokichi in both of your free periods, a DICE rival they pranked one too many times. He came up to you sitting down and pretty obviously bad mouthing Kokichi, trying to convince you, he could give you so much more than Kokichi ever could, and that he’d never hide you. 

Kokichi however had just walked into earshot of the dude, catching every word and getting extremely upset, part of him wondering if that was true, could he really give you more than the supreme leader. Besides what he was wondering, he also saw you, extremely uncomfortable looking like a bunny being hunted by a predator. Trying to inch your way away from him, choosing to stay silent, but the boy just wouldn’t give up, moving closer and upping the ‘dump him, date me’ talk. 

Kokichi calmly walked over, grabbed your hand and pulled you towards him, landing you in his chest, looking at the male with an unexplainable expression. Looking back to you he said “Crackerjack, you know, talking to shit eating toilets isn’t sanitary.” he turned to the man, face darkened, grin widened and the iconic finger over his mouth. “I hope you choke on the shit you talk, fucking hoe.”

[vrisrezis]

Aot characters with a crush and in a relationship (spoilers for all the anime tbh) (HAVENT proof read sorry for any mistakes)

- compliment her at all and she’s a blushy mess

- showing gratitude towards her also makes her blush

- she is protective, acts like a mom sometimes since she’s always making sure you’re eating, sleeping etc. she is very worried for your health usually and if you’re anything like eren she has to constantly look after you

- not good at comforting or affection; she would be very flustered if you hugged her though

- quite protective in general but especially with you

- you’re her top priority in battle and at times it clouds her judgement

- if somebody ever hurt you she will attack them unless somebody stopped her

- she is very jealous also, like if anyone took an interest in you she is very annoyed by them so quick dude

- kinda tries to get rid of the person and get you to stop talking to them, she just tries anything she can to get you to stop talking to them if she felt they were truly a threat

- probably gets jealous of Annie

- would blush ofc if anyone suggested her liking you

- would feel betrayed if armin or eren liked you (honestly she’d be so pissed omfg)

- probably would “accidentally” grab your hand somehow, or even to grab your hand to help you up, or to stop you, etc. she tries so hard to be subtle but she is not subtle

- she adores you though for real, anybody can see it as it’s quite obvious ...

- she holds such a attachment to you it doesn’t feel right not having you around she’s kinda clingy..

- she holds in her feelings for a long time because she doesn’t wanna ruin what you have + being in a war and shit really doesn’t help

- she’s scared to lose you, she lost her family already and almost lost eren so she’s very scared to lose you

- actually that’s how she confessed, she confessed how scared she was to lose you after a nightmare she had and ending up telling you her feeelings and you’ve been together since

- being affectionate is something she isn’t amazing at, but she will try since she’s dating you now

- she is overal very shy, you probably have to initiate most things but after awhile will initiate small things like holding hands

- she likes when you’re affectionate though, and she will tell you that if you ask

- comforting her after a nightmare is a common occurrence, apparently insomnia runs with the ackermans ...

- while she may not be the best with comforting she will do whatever you want, speaking of which she in general will do whatever you ask of her

- loyal to the bitter end it seems <//3

- still a blushy gal

- she just looks at you so lovingly with a smile, she loves you so much

- jealousy is a thing within your relationship but it’s not too common.. but sometimes it happens and she gets possessive and doesn’t know what to do

- still protective, she sleeps with you now and when you don’t she gets paranoid. She gets really worried if youre ever in any distress also

- she adores your hugs the most, please just hug her please she hasn’t felt a proper hug in years

- after this is all over, she really just wants you two to live together and have a normal domestic life. She wants kids too, she truly just wants to be a normal girl with you.

- with a crush she is not shy unlike mikasa.. she is actually pretty straight forward with her advances and doesn’t beat around the bush about it

- she is very flirty, and will often state she likes you or wants to date you etc

- always protective of you, with how much she flirts maybe she makes it seem like she wants to have a one night stand or something. She shows in other ways she cares for you and is protective

- even before dating can be physically touchy, wrapping an arm around you often. Maybe a kiss on the forehead or cheek, maybe she grabs your hand. That’s when she’s having a good day though.

- she opens up about most things with you ... most things.. doesn’t open up about the titan thing for a long time

- she doesn’t bother to hide anything in terms of her feelings for you, she doesn’t think of relationships and love as weakness and feels no reason to hide your relationship

- she makes it very apparent though she would kill anyone for you if you desired (except historia)

- if anyone threatens you she is killing on sight

- when she’s absolutely sure she is in love with you is when she decides to date you, though she mainly holds back on formally dating you because you could die at any moment

- she literally just asks you out since by now she knows you like her, full confidence but with a soft smile

- now she’s just really affectionate and loving, hand holding at (almost) all times, kisses on the forehead and cheek are still there of course but we all know kissing your lips is her favorite

- she tells you she wants to marry you after all of this is over, you can only hope.

- while showing a much more vulnerable and soft side is rare she shows it when you two are alone and she’s feeling a certain way (take that as you will)

- she’s a big cuddler honestly

- nightmares are often but never wants to admit to it or ask for help, just stay awake with her and help her back to sleep anyways.. she’ll appreciate it more than you know

- as shown by previous statements is very protective of you and honestly would not like anybody that did not like you

- while not overly lovey dovey she has her moments

- she makes you promise her if she dies you better not give up on your life

- but she doesn’t plan on dying anytime soon

- still flirty with you of course but it’s much more cocky/confident (while yes she sounded like that before dating it’s more genuine now, she was kinda worried for awhile you didn’t like her)

- if anyone shows interest in you she is kicking their ass I stg she is such a jealous bitch

- she calls you an idiot affectionately if that was even possible

- “my idiot” like ok girl

- Reiner likes you guys together he adores y’all and so does historia (he probably likes y’all together so he has a better chance with historia)

- just spending alone time at night is your idea of a date since you can’t really go on dates

- trains with you often, especially if you’re weaker than her she can use it as an excuse to help you train

- she ends up just flirting with you the whole time though

- are you clumsy? No? Doesn’t matter you are now because she will constantly make you trip and fall only to mysteriously always be the one to catch you ;)

- she already asked you to marry her all you guys have to do is survive <//3

- usually when flirting it’s about how hot you are, she never really gets sentimental but when she does it’s very sweet

- so many times she’s caught looking at you lovestruck she’s secretly a nerd

- first glance at you and she’s like “that’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen wtf”

- and ever since clings to you like her life depends on it

- fr this girl is a huge simp

- she has a habit of randomly grabbing your hands

- totally not because she just wants to hold your hands

- she likes you so much she will even share her food with you

- sometimes can’t help but blush, it’s always embarrassing to know how flustered she can get around you

- at times can be protective, but really only in battle. How can you expect her not to though?

- often finds excuses to spend time with you, even if Connie and Jean are around it doesn’t matter as long as she’s with you

- Connie definitely teases her about her obvious crush on you, bonus points if you’re oblivious because he will do it even more often

- hugs you randomly

- does stupid shit to impress you, just embarrasses herself

- doesn’t stfu about you when talking to Jean and Connie

- confessing takes a long time, honestly it takes a lot of Jean and Connie convincing her to just tell you already since they’re sick of her embarrassing herself in front of you or just gushing over you

- when confessing, it was simply her telling you how she felt and offering you some meat.

- in a relationship she’s pretty much the same but doesn’t hide how she feels, now not only is she gushing about how much she loves you to your face, but even moreso with Connie and Jean, and embarrassing herself increases... Connie and Jean truly regret their life decisions now

- dates aren’t common for people like you guys but she will just be like let’s eat meat alone together and that’s your idea of a date.

- often goes to you for help when she does something stupid and needs help... like eating all the food

- it’s hard for her not to get bored on certain missions, so you keep her entertained

- honestly you have to keep her from falling asleep

- she tries to goof off with you too much and it gets you both in trouble

- PDA is a big yes if you’re comfortable

- cheek kisses are common

- if she’s ever scared she’ll cling to you, like FR you always make her feel safe and protected.. (even if she’s the one to save you often no matter the situation you make her feel safer)

- always holding hands with you pleass

- she wants to get the war over with so y’all can live together maybe with Connie too

- links arms with you so often

- her idea of being romantic is just sharing meat with you but like at the same time? Yknow that Disney movie with the two dogs sharry spaghetti ? Yeah that’s y’all with meat and bread

- she likes to think she can impress you with her skills but you’re usually the one saving her ass from Titans and her gushing over how strong you are

- you can call her anything even insult her it doesn’t matter she will gush anyways... heart eyes for you all the time wow ..

- loves squishing your cheeks she thinks it’s cute

- where do I even begin? This girl ... she will do absolutely anything for you, she is so sweet she will just .. do whatever you tell her to

- as long as she sees that it benefits you...

- she can be quite blushy at times though

- she will be so sweet to you, even if you’re a shit. Sure, she’ll have a few things to say about it but she adores you so much she lets it slide and is nice to you

- she’s very touchy physically when liking you, although a bit shy about it she tries to make it seem friendly

- she hates liking you though because we all know she’s a whole ass lesbian that’s a queen and will be forced to marry a guy so ... can’t say she exactly likes that she likes you so much

- she’s not protective as she’s aware of your abilities, she doesn’t feel the need to be and it’s likely you’re tougher than her anyways

- worries for you a lot though, mainly when it comes to how your mental health is

- if youre ever in a tough situation she tries to help any way she thinks she can help

- she doesn’t really tell you how she feels, she thinks it’s just pointless since you might not even like her

- ymir has to egg her on and it eventually works because damn she’s getting on her nerves

- when she does she’s all blushy and feels bad that she can’t offer you much other than food, it’s very heartfelt and sweet though how could you resist?

- while other soldiers might be aware of your relationship for awhile, upon becoming queen it’s mainly a secret

- you will have lots of “midnight talks” which totally aren’t you two kissing and doing whatever...

- probably your own way of having a date though tbh

- she’s gonna be “forced” into pregnancy, if you’re willing to help her raise the child she will be very happy.. your relationship is very much a secret but she sees nobody else the way she sees you

- but back onto general hcs

- cuddling with you often, she likes feeling safe and small with you

- sings you to sleep if you can’t sleep.. she’s good at it

- cheek kisses.. so many cheek kisses

- Eskimo kisses

- she thinks they’re cute leave her alone >:(

- she can’t help but feel happier whenever you’re around, no matter what happens as long as she has you she can always be happy in the end

- you’re just... so special to her :(

- Reiner so jealous ... maybe ymir too..

- having her jump into your arms and you twirling her in the air? Common occurrence

- you calling her princess? Also common . Could be a cute nickname or something sarcastic she hates who knows

- smushes your cheeks together she is such a dork

- just loves you so much, looks at you with so much love.. like you’re the only person in the world

- she wishes you could go on normal dates so bad though

- has a habit of gushing about you to people ..

- everybody ships yall hard though

- initially doesn’t get what she’s feeling, she’s never liked somebody in the romantic sense so you can’t blame her for not understanding her feelings

- however she is actually nice to you, although she’s got her usual scary face on she doesn’t say mean things to you

- she looks out for you often, and wouldn’t hesitate to tell you that she missed having you around (like ex missing training with you because you’ve been injured)

- pretty honest with you about a lot and how she cares for you, but doesn’t tell you the extent of how much she cares for you

- very protective

- if you got yourself injured she’s angry, will kill whoever got you injured (unless it’s one of your comrades) but would beat the shit outta them

- but would yell at you too

- her feelings are kinda obvious since she would blush if you touched her physically, she’s practically dying inside

- if you’re nice to her it just makes her so blushy but so happy that she might just smile a little

- you pay attention to her and she’s all mushy inside

- she’s not sure how she feels approaching you about her feelings especially if you’re the enemy but she does so anyways because she can’t ignore her feelings any longer. She holds in her emotions for so long and eventually can’t hold it in

- she tells you straight up how she feels, and that’s the end of it. She doesn’t ask if you wanna date, that’s all it is.

- dating you though makes her nervous. Before entering the relationship opens up completely about being a titan, and her whole situation. If you stick with her anyway she’s happy and loves you very much.

- poor bertholdt

- she’s not good with being affectionate so please initiate most things, she will learn and will be more affectionate as time goes by

- she’s very sweet with you so

- smiles a lot, loves holding your hand and cuddling you

- she’s a big softly with you honestly

- does not like you around historia, she’s very jealous of her low key lol

- she likes being able to protect you, if you try to protect her she will most likely feel embarrassed unless you’re known to be stronger or as strong as her

- stays up late at night with you just talking about whatever

- gushes about how she loves you to your face but only when you’re asleep

- it’s the only time she can let her real feelings for you out okay?

- she’s very blushy around you tho gonna be real

- say you love her? She’s a blushy mess

- “don’t you ever get tired of saying embarrassing shit like that”

- she’s protective and hates the idea of you getting hurt but also would not hesitate to kick your ass if you almost got yourself killed or something and an ass kicking from Annie is not something you’d want

- forehead kisses she loves so much

- she’s kinda unaware of how others may feel towards her but is painfully aware if others like you

- would not hesitate to threaten or blackmail

- stares at you a lot.. she loves you pls .. if you say anything about it she not only stops but probably tells you to fuck off or something

- she hates loving you sometimes because it can be seen as weakness but she can’t help it sadly

- they are so clingy! Even when you guys are just friends.. they can’t help it though! You make them very happy and they wanna be happy more often than not !

- finds excuses to spend time with you, many people think you’re their assistant rather than moblit because of how much time you spend together.

- they have no fear nor shame, they aren’t against side hugging or hugging in general to be honest

- while yes they get excited about titans to the point of blushing, they get that same excitement around you or even when you’re just mentioned

- always tons of compliments are sent your way, they want you to know how amazing you are !

- they do whatever they can to make sure you’re alive and well, they do a lot of checkups with you as well. Hange is the closest the survey corps has to a doctor, they’re mostly experienced in that field so it’s not like they’re bad for having that be the case.. however..

- this also means people come in sick which means you could get sick! So they do anything they can to prevent that.. after all you being sick means less time with you and that’s not ideal to be honest

- have the tendency to grab your wrist or hand... totally not cuz they like you that would be absurd ..

- whenever they get excited about titans and whatnot they talk to you about it since you’re the only one that listens and doesn’t seem bothered

- they don’t realize their feelings for you, they’re smart but they’re an idiot when it comes to love.. at least with them. If anyone else liked somebody they’d realize, but when it comes to liking somebody, or somebody liking them they’re so oblivious.

- Levi had to push them into asking you out to begin with

- they were nervous, they know how dangerous this job is.. love isn’t ideal... relationships aren’t always something you can do..

- also on top of that you might not even return their feelings

- when they ask you out they simply confess and tell you how they feel, however they tell you they understand that there are some issues within having a relationship with eachother

- when you say yes though they’re very happy and overjoyed

- big cuddlebug, they cannot help it

- always clings to you, constant hand holding

- kissing on your cheek? Often

- cute kisses in general yeah

- like historia, Eskimo kisses >:]

- when being introduced to new people always introduced themselves and then you as their s/o like everytime “this is my wonderful, amazing, perfect s/o!! Y/n!”

- let’s you do their hair in the morning

- speaking of which they’re so clingy you guys probably just sleep together now like they’re just ... they love always being around you

- not too protective, they put a lot of faith in you (maybe too much faith)

- doesn’t shut up about you, they could gush about you for literally hours... even days

- they’re always so happy around you, even in s4 when the war starts to take its toll on them

- they always feel safe and comforted when they’re with you and that’s all that matters to them

- they’re a bit more protective after they lose moblit and Erwin though... can you blame them? They lost important people

- somehow more clingy, (not in front of yelena, onyankopon, they refuse to be lovey around them, and zeke too of course)

- however yes other than that overly clingy, always touching you somehow

- or asking you if they could ever be as good as Erwin, why he would even choose them, etc. they really don’t believe they deserve their position so please remind them he chose them for a reason

- they love you SOO much

- she can’t help but wanna always be around you, you bring her this sense of peace... something she can’t exactly always have

- she cares a great deal for you, to her you’re something special and she needs to keep around as long as possible

- stares at you lovingly quite often

- not against hugging you randomly either

- wants to always be by your side but also fears coming off too strong as she doesn’t want her feelings being too obvious

- she kinda doesn’t like the idea of being a warrior anymore, she understands the great honor and all that.. but she would’ve liked to live long with you

- she deems you as precious, so she often goes the extra mile to keep you protected and safe

- often hangs around you, porco gets curious as to why she doesn’t hang around him as much till he realizes she found somebody she loves

- he totally tries to get her to ask you out by the way.. there’s no time like now when either of you could die at any moment

- she eventually decided that she agrees with him and asks you out, probably got you some flowers or something you’d like as well..

- as a girlfriend she usually is quite relaxed with you, so she is a big cuddlebug

- usually on top of you while cuddling so she can kinda be on all fours

- not against squishing your cheeks, she loves doing that she thinks it’s cute

- often holding your hand or arm in some way, she needs to she hates not being able to you have become her lifeline

- she would do absolutely anything she could to keep you safe and protected

- dates aren’t often, but who said they couldn’t happen? She likes taking you out on pizza dates

- sometimes gushes about you to porco, he is the only one that will listen and even if he acts annoyed it makes him happy that she has somebody she loves and cares for so much

- often may follow you blindly though, honestly if you wanted to switch around and join up with Levi and the others she would be all for it (reluctantly but yeah, she follows you no matter what)

- that’s cause she cares for you more than she’s ever cared about anybody and will willing do whatever you want her to do

- would sacrifice everything for you she is so giving when it comes to you it’s like something porco has never seen before jfc

- so he definitely warns you of this newfound power and not to abuse it or he will kill you 😁

- okay but seriously despite her unhealthy habits with giving way too much, she adores you and wants what’s best for you she is a sweetheart

- very loyal, even if you tried to push her away

- since she is very smart on the battlefield, if she senses danger of some kind she will make sure you’re away from all of that

- she’s just protective of you at times, she’s scared to lose you sooner than she has to

- I feel like pieck gets flirted with often, due to her strength because she’s the cart titan and being admired but also because hey she’s pretty cute ... jealous you ensues

- she will comfort you though and give you tons of kisses she loves you babe :(

- lots of kisses from her in general though !

- probably suggests just living together cuz she always is around you and just is a clingy baby

- she likes being swung around in your arms, or swinging you around in her arms

- she wishes she met you sooner though, maybe she would’ve never became a titan and you could’ve lived a long life together

[bl00dgutsgl0ry]

Just Join Me

Pairing - Childe/Tartaglia x Reader

Warnings - Violence, mentions of gore and injury, mildly angsty but it gets better I promise. :^) Also be careful this does contain spoilers.

Other Comments - So I have obviously gotten into Genshin Impact much like the rest of the world as of right now so of course I had to write for it. And of course much like many others I have fallen head over heels for Childe. I did change the Tartaglia fight but that's because I love writing angsty fights lol!

      You knew he was bad news, he was a Fatui Harbinger for crying out loud but you wanted to ignore it. You wanted to believe that he was better than this. But there you stood, dodging the furious amount of arrows and blade swipes coming from this thing you once knew. Someone you had believed was trying to be better than who he truly was; someone who was trying to help you, someone who wanted to be your friend. The False Legacy form was clearly taking a toll on the man as he he had gotten slightly slower, barely noticeable to someone who wasn’t paying attention, but to you, an opening; a break.

      The more you thought about the façade he had shown you, the more you broke down. Anger, betrayal, sadness, all welling up inside threatening to break through. You didn’t want to hurt him, or worse, kill him; but your options were getting slim as you became closer to the breaking point.  

      “Is this all you’ve got?! And to think I thought this fight was gonna be good!” Even though Tartaglia had slowed, his shots and jabs were still as powerful and it was getting hard to keep dodging, just barely being able to get out of the way before he charged towards you. 

      “I guess all that fighting talk at the beginning was just a desperate attempt to intimidate me!” Another swing, two arrows this time hitting you right in the thigh and shoulder. You cried out as your body flew back onto the ground letting go of your weapon accidentally. As you lay on the ground, the sound of his footsteps echoed against the floor. The faces of all the friends you had made flashed in front of you as well as your twin. You were supposed to save them but look at you now. Paimon tugged desperately against your leg, calling your name begging for you to get back up.

      “(Y/n) please!! Please Paimon can’t fight without you! Paimon wants to find your twin! Please get up!” Tartaglia’s chuckled suddenly pulled you out of your thoughts, his figure showing up in the corner of your tear blurred vision. The pain in your leg and shoulder seared as he kneeled down next to you.

      “I had much higher hopes for you poor (y/n). I thought you would’ve been harder to fight.” You grit your teeth against the pain. Clearly Tartaglia knew this fight was over has he let his guard down considerably. Something bloomed within you as you saw the look on Tartaglia’s face, he was laughing at you.

      In one swift motion, your hand appeared in front of the blonde’s face the power of Anemo swirling in your palm. You watched as his eyes widened almost in slow motion, his gaze glancing from your palm to meet your eyes. Something about his demeanor changed in those few seconds as you sent his body flying backwards. You had remembered an Anemo skill Jean had taught you that helped you semi heal your wounds; they still hurt but it was bearable, it had to be. You suddenly dashed forwards shoving your foot onto Tartaglia’s neck and pressing down; not hard enough to hurt him too much just enough to keep him in place.

      His eyes shot up to yours, the shock on his face satisfying you for some reason, but it was not enough to smolder to flame of rage inside of you. 

      “You were supposed to be better than this! I knew you were a Harbinger and I still got attached! You were a friend! You piece of shit! You’re horrid! A rat in the gutter you awful human being! I liked you and you betrayed me!! Fuck you!” You continued to hurl insults, one after another never letting up as he sat there in shock. As you yelled you thought that it would help make you feel better but it only made you feel angrier as you lifted your hand once again sending a rush of sharp wind towards him, slicing his face and shoving his head back into the ground as he had been able to lift it while you were screaming.

      Blood gushed from his head, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment. You took this moment to lower yourself has your landed hit after hit against his face and chest. Blood covered your fists as you kept screaming with every strike. Your hits began to slow as you were beginning to tire yourself out. He was starting to get dizzy when he felt it. You let your forehead fall against his chest; balled fists stalling at the sides of your head, body racking with loud sobs. He’d seen and made many people cry before but something about seeing you crying broke something in him, not even that but knowing that he was what was making you sob.

      “(Y/n)..-”

      “Don’t. I already know what you’re going to say. ‘Oh how pathetic you’re crying over someone you knew was never going to be on your side’.” There it was again, that cracking feeling as Tartaglia’s chest tightened hearing you impersonate him. He wasn’t supposed to feel like this towards you, a couple of seconds ago he was trying to kill you, why was he regretting that? 

      “That’s not what I was going to say.” A sharp laugh echoed in the almost silent room. 

      “Save me from hearing your thoughts on me crying you dick.”

      “Fucking listen to me (y/n).” You fell silent suddenly, raising your head to look up at the bruised and bloody man above you.

      “I fucked up (y/n). I am sorry. At the beginning I didn’t want to have to hurt you I swear. I enjoyed being around you. You are genuine and brave and empathetic, everything I wish I was.” Tears once again began to well up in your eyes, but as they fell Tartaglia caught them with his thumb; gloved hand cupping your cheek.

      “I do not know what to say to explain myself or get you to forgive me for there is nothing to say.” 

      “Then please, join me. Join my group, leave the Fatui and help me.”

      “I..” Tartaglia began to say before you stopped him, as you pressed your lips against his. He felt tears fall against his face, he wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around you.

      “Please Tartaglia..” Something about you saying his name made him want to hear you say it again.

      “I will. I will I promise. I will make everything up to you.”

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hullo JWB..

Have been watching your VMs on loop these days..they make me smile and brighten my day..please accept my sincere appreciation for the awesome peice of art you create🥰♥️

I am also rewatching the show and the Arnav in Gupta house track feels a little rushed..i love the growth that Arnav undergoes from being insensitive to becoming a part of the household but would have loved a lil more time for it to develop and maybe a few more conversations..but i guess then it would have been too lengthy and subtlety is wat nakes ipk special (i just anwered myself😬) ...also few of the things Khushi does are too infantile..esp making him at the handpump...is it her way of getting a reaction from him?...I love that she is now more comfortable with him physically.. esp when teasing him..she is running around holding his hand and chatting while he is in a towel...it shows natural progression and having a rabba ve each time would have been over the top..i love how ipk shows yet subverts many tropes....

Coming to the ask..wanted your thoughts on the handpump scene where ahe bathes him..it wasn't troubleshooting due to accidental circumstances but deliberate and a gross invasion of his privacy..what do you think of Arnav's reaction that he didn't get ASR angry..just shrugged it off..?

This got too long..sorry for that..

Take care

Dearest @simplycurlz

Thank you so much for the sweet compliments! 😊

I also feel they should’ve added a few more days at the Gupta House (not the crazy parts) because it addressed two key things:

- an actual growth between Arnav and Khushi

- the fact that Khushi has a family and Arnav, by marriage, is linked to another family and his own role as a ‘damaad’ and ‘pati’ - roles he easily could forgo at Shantivan but not here.

I always loved the Gupta house track because in a way it made him more accountable for the decision he took (i.e., to marry her). And I genuinely saw some good arc and growth here for the characters individually and as a couple.

And of course, I HATED WHAT THEY DID WITH THE REST OF THE TRACK! I understand comedy was necessary - I laughed my head off when Buaji assumed Arnav was partially deaf because of his Bluetooth - but everything else was cringeworthy.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and that is absolutely right for everyone! So I have no comments over Khushi growing more comfortable with Arnav, because I was more disturbed by Arnav’s lack of consent and invasion of privacy.

It was not funny. Or even acceptable.

There’s a certain amount of trust Arnav has with Khushi to appear in a semi naked state in front of her. He consents to be seen that way only by her, only because he is unable to help himself.

But Khushi violates his consent and privacy grossly by pulling him to the public.

Let me remind everyone, Arnav has not consented to be seen like this in front of strangers. I cannot even imagine the humiliation he goes through to suddenly find tens of people looking at him, that too bathing publicly.

When Arnav unzips his jacket in front of all and works out - that’s ok. He is consenting to that and his privacy is not being violated because he took that decision.

But being shirtless in front of strangers, with only a wet towel and boxers is humiliating. The fact they try to play this as comedy just infuriates me because it’s not funny. And to make it worse, Khushi does not even realize how insulting it can be for him! Or even embarrassing!

I agree, Arnav has done terrible things to her - and she deserves to exact revenge and have a hard discussion with him. This was not one of it.

I chuckled when Khushi literally used his “I can do anything” against him by making him fix everything because it was still in measure. But cooking red chillies when he couldn’t keep his eyes open, publicly ridicule his stature and respect, bathe him publicly, not giving him proper food and not the basic decency to bathe was… unacceptable.

It’s not childish. It’s stupid. I have a thousand things to be upset on Arnav, but somehow his anger and grief is more rooted and legitimized.

Now I know Khushi is childish and impulsive, but this is also the same woman who has dealt with other issues and her own hurt better in the best. But no, her reaction needs to be immature.

#becausewivesareonlyfunny

Okay, there might be examples of Khushi doing childish stuff before to exact her petty revenge in the past. So shouldn’t there be some changes with time and experience? Then my point is… where is the character growth? Aren’t characters supposed to grow?

I don’t know this whole thing just rubs me in the wrong way and I have a ton of negative thoughts about this 😓

Coming to Arnav’s reaction - we see his anger. It’s building over time. As a private person he does NOT like to vent his personal matters in public. Him walking away is a sign enough. And we see that anger coming out when he yells at her about the “Amma” calling and the argument that they have in the bedroom. He was just keeping his tone down because he was not in his home and he’s a guest at Lakshminagar. But his burst when he calls her a thief for his stolen car parts (which was incredibly wrong) was an effect of this.

He totally did not shrug it off. He swallowed his anger knowing the other people didn’t know better.

But Khushi did.

And he knows she did this on purpose. And there’s no way he’d yell at her with people staring at them.

(You’d ever see him burst out in places which he calls his own - his house or his office - not that it makes his anger ok either)

Best,

- JWB