#i have a very low tolerance for being argued with

[ragnarlothcat]

My god when you changed your icon I thought you were a different user but I saw ut has your name and I was so confused. I was thinking someone was trying to pretend they were you, I went though your latest post about out of the bag but the thing is I didn't refresh so when I was browsing your blog every stuff I liked was out of place.

And that kinda sent to down the path thinking "Omg these user is trying to be ragnor" but sensible I went back and checked your blog again since I know I follow you and realised you just changed your icon. I was ready to fight for your honour but it was you all along sjwj

Oh no 😂 I promise I am me (although that's exactly what an alien pretending to be me would say) and that Cam and I are just continuing our theme of switching icons with the seasons. So I will warn you now that I will probably be changing icons again come winter (my winter, Cam's summer because she is mean and won't trade latitudes with me).

I'm very charmed you were ready to fight for my honour!!! If I ever do get impersonated (although to what end? what would they want with my tumblr account? it can't be all the sugar daddy bots, they aren't even offering competitive rates) I will rest easy knowing you'll defeat the imposter, thank you 🥰

[mydearlybeloathed]

𝐒𝐀𝐈𝐋 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍 ¹

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: once upon a time, you weaseled your way into the demon pirate hunter's confidance, and maybe even his heart too. but one bounty gone wrong leads to you being left behind, and you just can't understand why. now, zoro's departure draws near, and your tolerance of his bullshit has run thin. it's time to face this, or risk losing him forever.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: opla!zoro x fem!reader

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 6k

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: swearing, use of Y/N, angst with a happy ending (sort of), mention of alcohol, an oc i really like :), reader has a backstory, takes place three years before Zoro meets Luffy

𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐤: lost at sea

The breeze washed in from the sea, brushing your hair away from your face so you couldn't hide behind it any longer. 

The stitched up slash across your back throbbed with every breath you took, and honestly, you were shocked you were even standing this long. But you’d spent three days lying in a stupid bed, arguing with your green-haired companion to no avail. You couldn't stand to lay down any longer.

He was leaving you on this stupid fucking island, and there was nothing you could say to dissuade him. 

So now, standing on the docks of Syrup Village, you tried to ignore how your heart ached watching Zoro make arrangements with the captain of a nearby supply ship. Despite every hardship you’d known in your life, never had you felt so helpless. And that was saying something.

It felt like just yesterday you’d been an apprentice under a skilled apothecary, studying chemistry and botany day in and day out, displaying prowess in the field. You were on your way to opening your own apothecary one day. Until the pirates attacked. 

For years after they sieged your village, you were the decorated captive of cruel pirates, forced to use your knowledge and skill to craft poisons that would end hundreds of lives over the course of your imprisonment. The fates of your faceless victims haunted you by night, even now.

But then, after so long of that neglect and servitude, you were freed. It was just over a year ago the pirate crew was torn apart by a single boy with green hair and three swords. His intention hadn't been to rescue you, of course, that was clear by the bounty he took on the captain of the ship. But he didn’t leave you there, and to you, that meant everything. 

Zoro found you annoying to no end, what with your insistence that you repay your debt to him despite his insistence that he wanted nothing to do with you. Still, he never truly forced you away, not finding it in himself to do so. 

So leads the tale of how you forced your company upon the notorious Demon Pirate Hunter, becoming his life’s greatest annoyance, and consequently, his only friend. 

Zoro had never been too socially inclined, always managing to say the wrong thing. He felt glaring was the extent of communication he needed—and you never minded. You let him have his silence and made a little game out of trying to make him be the first to break it. 

When he glared, you glared right back, keeping his stare with twitchy eyes and silly expressions until he had to break the contact, lest you discover the smile hidden on his face.

Eventually, he stopped trying to ditch you at every port, opting to feign sleep and curl into your side atop a musty inn mattress, shared to “save beri” as he put it. You knew it was more than that, of course, but you let him keep the pretense that he wasn’t fond of you for at least a little while more. 

The pair of you fought side by side, tracking down pirates by day and whispering in low-lit corners by night. The happiest you’d ever been was by Zoro’s side, but all happy things end.

Zoro’s most recent bounty had gone very, very south.

One moment you were in the middle of following Zoro’s lead, taking out the sparse crew with your dagger. It was supposed to be a simple job, with you covering Zoro as he went for the captain of the crew. Key word being supposed.

The motions leading up to the fatal moment were still a blur, but you would never forget the cold terror that rushed through you as sharp steel slashed the skin of your back. You collapsed immediately, the pain so great that your body chose to go numb to protect you from the intensity.

And though now you swore you were fine, Zoro saw every paranoid glance you cast over your shoulder, as though afraid it would happen again. Suddenly you felt thrown back in time, meek and terrified in the face of cruel pirates, crafting whatever poison they required.

You weren’t very surprised when Zoro told you he wanted you to remain in Syrup Village, but that didn’t make it sting any less.

The village doctor, a woman called Vee, didn’t hesitate to agree to letting you room with her. She had been looking for someone to split rent with anyway. Vee said she could always pay you to deliver medicine, and after hearing of your background in apothecary, she was very excited to expand on your teaching through an apprenticeship. (You hated to admit you were excited to learn how to cure people, not kill them).

It was all so sudden and unreal. Zoro seemed so eager to leave you behind. He hadn't met your eyes since you’d regained consciousness and your entire being ached from the absence of his ever faint smile. 

You didn’t know how much more of this you could take.

Zoro's eyes remained on the ground as he approached you, and only when he stood right in front of you did he raise his gaze scan over your body. Still, he never looked you in your eyes. “Are you sure—”

“I’m fine, Zoro,” you cut him off, saying his name sharply, coldly even. In all honesty, you were exhausted. You just wanted to sleep away the pain in your body as well as in your heart. “When do you leave?”

“Sunrise.” So soon. The words left his lips like they had no significance at all. Like this wouldn't be the last time he ever saw you. You’d always known Zoro would put his dream above you… but it was very different to experience it in real time.

It seemed he finally realized what a burden you were. It was only a matter of time, really. You cleared your throat, feeling a burn rise from your neck to your tongue as words begged to be let loose. 

Not seeing much point in holding back anymore, you let them. 

Your gaze flicked back to his face as got right in his line of sight, catching his eyes and locking him in place. The air felt heavy. “I’ll be better in a week at best. I—”

“No.” 

It was like getting smacked in the face all over again. To save you the shame of having him see you cry, you turned your face away, a new wash of anger coming over you. “Fine. Fuck, see if I care… You snore anyway.”

Your voice broke off into a weak crack, and you were turning on your heel to leave him on the pier before he could say anything. With tears rolling down your cheeks, you walked into Vee’s little home, sat on the cot she’d given you, and took off your boots. It didn’t feel like home when you slept your sorrows away. There was no warm body at your back, no arm slipped around your waist that would be gone in the morning, off getting a lead on the next bounty.

Sleep found you, somehow, and your dreams were filled with memories of days much better than this.

જ⁀➴

Zoro hated this. Every emotion he was feeling was another dagger to his lungs. Every break of your heart was a scorch on his chest. 

He downed another drink, tossing it back in one motion. You’ll be safe here. Syrup Village was… quaint. Free of any action, free of any danger. Though, the more he looked around, the more he thought that this was not your type of scene. He couldn’t explain why, he just knew: you were going to hate this place.

But you were safe. That was all that mattered.

Zoro called the bartender over for yet another drink, not keeping a tally of how many he’d downed that night. Swirling the alcohol around the glass, he forced away every feeling and every doubt. In Syrup Village, you would recover, away from the danger his line of work required.

Never again would he hold your dying body in his arms.

A figure sidled up to him at the bar. He glanced over. There was Vee, the village doctor, and your new housemate. She looked less than pleased as she snapped for the bartender. Receiving a glass of vodka, she turned to Zoro with steely eyes. “She’s beside herself, you know.”

He didn’t need this. He really didn’t need this. “What do you know?”

Vee’s brows drew with the challenge. “I know that poor girl is lying in my house crying over you, asshole.” She tipped her drink back and slammed it back down. “Let me tell you somethin’, Pirate Hunter.”

Zoro waited, eyes locked on the counter. “The moment she woke up, you know what she said?” Vee let out a weary sigh. “She said where’s Zoro? Is Zoro okay? I need to see Zoro.”

“Your point?” 

“My point,” Vee nearly snarled. “Is that I’ve known her what, two days? And it’s already plain to me. If your plan is to make her care for you turn into loathing, you’re on the right track, pal.”

Gripping his empty glass, Zoro was at a loss. He knew you cared for him. Hell, he cared for you just as much, if not more. Which is why he had to do this. You could barely even stand—he saw through your act in seconds—and it’d be much longer than a week for you to entirely recover from your injuries. He felt like clawing out his hair, like screaming even. Why did the right thing feel so very wrong?

Vee leaned on the counter, kissing her teeth. “My advice? Don’t leave with her thinking this is on her.”

“Why would she—”

“Trust me.” Vee settled him with a glare. “She thinks this is her fault.”

Vee knew nothing, Zoro told himself. Vee had no right to step in on his relationship with you, or lack thereof. There was no way in hell Zoro would let Vee’s words get to him.

Which is why he was sitting on the curb across from Vee’s house, trying to figure out what to say to you that would salvage the only friendship he’d had since Kuina.

His head in his arms, Zoro tapped his toe on the cobblestones, and closed his eyes. What would Kuina think of him, so frazzled over a girl like he was a kid again. Not just any girl, though. This was you, so it mattered more than he was ready to admit. 

A little grin worked its way up his face. Kuina would call him a coward. She’d punch his arm and tell him to just lay it all out.

“She hates me,” he whispered to no one. “I’m making her hate me.”

Like a ghost, he swore he heard the smug voice of his sparring partner at his side, a ghost's words burning into his brain: What are you gonna do about it, Roronoa?

He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, pathetically regretting every choice that led him to this moment, but it had been long enough for the street lamps to shut off, casting the road in a dull darkness enough to make him start creating figures in the shadows. 

Rubbing at his eyes, Zoro decided he needed some sleep. He left early in the morning, after all. But you, his heart screamed, in direct contrast with his head. 

You had completely infiltrated Zoro’s life. You were brash and defiant, insisting on following him around the East Blue until you could repay him for freeing you from your bastard captors. You stayed even after your life debt was paid, your hurricane person sticking to his side. You were like a bruise he discovered one day, unsure where it’d come from and at a loss as to when it would go.

Even now, you were a sore on his heart, working your way into his very soul.

His every blink was haunted by your smile. His every move was watched by your admiring gaze. These days he couldn’t even breathe without knowing you’re safe. 

Zoro knew that even if he left and never turned back, he’d never get rid of you. There was too much of you wrapped up in him, and it was terrifying.

He raised his eyes to the house across from him, and glanced over the hand painted sign reading Healing Remedies and Modern Medicines swinging in the midnight breeze. The light in the top window taunted him, the draping curtains daring him to walk in and reconcile.

But what if you didn’t want to? Your temper had always been reliable, never failing to rain upon those who wronged you. Zoro had never had the privilege of being on the receiving end of your wrath, and he was in no mood to start. 

A sigh forced its way out of him, heart thundering for reasons beyond him, and Zoro had to wonder why exactly he cared so much.

He was the Demon of the East Blue. The most feared pirate hunter this side of the Grand Line. He wielded Wado Ichimonji. And yet, Roronoa Zoro was crippled by the thought of how crestfallen you had looked that evening. When he’d told you no, something he rarely ever did. If only he could just tell you…

The light in the window went off, and he was really, truly, completely in the dark.

His head hit his knees, one hand going to rest on his sword. Zoro had no clue what to do. Perhaps… Perhaps it would be best to leave it all at this. You would grow to hate him, eventually, but you would never be hurt because of him ever again. 

“You’re gonna catch a cold.” 

Zoro just about unsheathed his sword, halfway standing by the time his eyes readjusted to the dark, and the outline of you settled in his head. You stood there in a nightgown with your arms crossed, expression unreadable. 

He relaxed, sitting back on the curb and averting his eyes. He heard you scoff, the fabric of your dress rustling as you moved to sit beside him. “Idiot,” you murmured, and he had to agree.

Instead of saying what he wanted to, Zoro demanded, “What’re you doing?”

Your eyes burned into the side of his skull, unrelenting in your blatant scorn. Sucking in a breath and letting it out, you felt your tolerance for bullshit meet its end. “I'm sitting. Zoro?”

When he barely even hummed in reply, face turned away from you, you rolled your eyes and grabbed his chin, jerking him around to look you in the eyes. The surprise on his face would’ve been funny had you not been pissed. “Zoro, grow up.”

Zoro would’ve given you the world. He would’ve killed anyone, stolen anything; all you had to do was ask. Yet, he couldn’t seem to find the words, no matter how he tried to force them. “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to…” As the sentence faltered on your tongue, Zoro saw that same starvation for the right thing to say in your eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t know!”

Releasing his chin, you shifted to face Vee’s house, hugging your knees to your chest and allowing the silence to swallow the conversation whole. Your frustration was palpable, radiating off your skin and latching onto Zoro, till the both of you were simply sitting on the curb amidst the complexity of emotions in the air.

It was infuriating.

You raked your hands through your hair and whirled on him suddenly. “I want to know why you’re abandoning me.”

“You’re injured,” he deadpanned, prompting a hefty sigh from you.

“Wounds heal. I’ll heal.” You searched his face, finding he betrayed absolutely nothing, per usual. “Do you think I’m weak?”

His rebuttal was immediate, and quick to be cut off. “I—”

“Because in case you don’t remember, I was on a pirate ship for years before I met you.”

“Y/N—”

“And I know I’m not easy.” Suddenly out of breath, you expelled all your thoughts. “I know I’m annoying and I probably do more harm than good and trust me, I know I’m a burden but I thought maybe… I thought maybe we were friends. I thought that maybe…”

Faltering, you forced yourself to face him, if only to see how much damage you’d done. Imagine your surprise when you found his gaze already zeroed in on you.

His eyes had always been beautiful, always so deep that it felt like you could drown in them if you let yourself. And now they bore into you with an intensity you were unaccustomed to.

“You’ve never been a burden,” he told you.

Raising a brow, “Never?”

You swore you could practically see the memories replayed in his eyes as a little smirk pulled at his lips. “Maybe at first.”

As quickly as it’d formed, your grin slid away, replaced by that same hopeless frown.

You felt it like cupping water in your hands; Zoro was slipping through your fingers with every second that passed. “I just don’t understand. I mean, I get that you liked the lone bounty hunter life but—”

Zoro shook his head. “That’s not it.”

At a loss, you looked at him with a pleading sort of gaze, glassy eyes nearly driving him over the edge. “Then tell me what is. Because I’m just gonna keep spitting out words and we both know that won’t end well.”

For a long time, he didn’t say a word. Maybe he couldn’t, you thought. Was it unfair to demand explanations from him? You were on the brink of telling him to forget everything and wishing him a safe journey, when he spoke, a quake in the usual even tone of his voice.

“Do you even remember what happened?”

It took you a moment to realize what he was talking about, and then the bandages wrapping from your back to your chest became all the more tangible, and your throat went dry. “I… Of course I do,” you said, not entirely sure it was true.

Zoro passed a hand over his face, fidgeting. “Do you remember how much blood you lost? How deep that wound is?” He could barely meet your eyes now, every ounce of the confidence you knew and loved gone missing. “Do you remember that your heart stopped beating?”

You hadn’t known. You hadn’t known any of that… but Zoro did, you realized, aching as he seemed to glare at the space ahead of him. “If I hadn’t gotten you here in time, you would have died.” His jaw set, tight fists rested on his knees. “You nearly died because of me.”

You reacted instantly—you couldn’t stand that look on his face—swiftly reaching for his hand and taking it in yours. “I didn’t die,” you insisted, “because of you. It is not your fault.”

He squeezed your hand. He didn’t really believe you, and you weren’t sure you could say anything to convince him. And when he met your gaze, you swore your heart swelled as realization set in.

You’d always had a hunch that your feelings were reciprocated—you’d always felt that he loved you too. Yet now, as you stared into his pretty eyes, it became a truth settled into the depths of your longing heart. So that’s what this is all about, you thought.

This all felt so wrong. How could he be leaving in the morning, with so many things left unsaid? And if you finally put these emotions to words now, what good would it do? 

The prospect of never seeing him again was worse than death itself. There was no way you’d let this be goodbye forever. 

“Zoro,” you whispered, tugging on his hand to draw his attention. “Sleep with me?”

His eyes slowly raised to your own, soft despite their cold, and he stood, taking you along with him. You led him into Vee’s house and up to the room she’d supplied you with. Zoro’s hand never once left yours, his thumb running circles on your skin. 

When you grimaced as you tried to lay back on the bed, Zoro was there in an instant, letting you squeeze the life out of his hand as he settled down beside you. 

He couldn’t help it: ”What was that about being fine?”

It dragged a laugh out of you, and you gazed over at him with your adoration wrapped up in your face. Zoro had never done anything wrong in your eyes—well, except leaving you behind, that is.

You brushed his hair off his forehead, your fingers drifting down to graze his cheek. At long last, the little smile was back on his face, though a bit sadder than usual. You’re sure your own grin looked the same. “You’re pretty when you smile.”

Zoro half rolled his eyes, shifting so he was lying on his side as you laid on your back. “Yeah, you’ve told me.”

“I wanna tell you again,” you shrugged. There was so much you needed to say, but the air was already so full of words, and you were tired. Tonight, you could lay by his side once more, and pretend watching a random barge take him away wouldn't tear your heart in two.

જ⁀➴

Zoro’s spot on the bed was cold when Vee came storming into the room the next morning.

Bleary eyed, you blinked sleep away as her frantic words left you confused to no end. You sat up only to have a dress thrown in your face. Looking it over, you questioned, “What?”

“Get up!” Vee ordered, her tan face a furious shade of red. “Up! Up!”

Your mind wasn’t catching up to your body. Your gaze fell to the bed, and the place where Zoro should have been. The sheets were tossed aside and his boots were gone. A cold pit formed in your gut. “Where’s Zoro?”

Vee exasperated, “The pier!”

In an instant your feet hit the floor, eyes blown wide, all air seized from your lungs. “No! He can’t—”

“Well, he is.” Without warning she spun you around and started to unbutton your night dress. “Put this on. His ship is almost set to leave.”

You’d never dressed so fast in your life, though you lacked shoes and the dress was only halfway tied in the back. You were decent, and that was enough. Bounding out of Vee’s house and through the streets, not one apology left your lips as you dodged in and out of people and carts, set on a desperate sprint to reach the docks.

“I’ll kill him,” you heaved. “I’ll chase him and find him and kill him, dammit.”

Your back ached and your limbs felt weak and you really needed a glass of water, but none of it mattered. If you didn’t make it, none of this mattered.

The flag of the merchant’s ship came into view. The sailors only had a few more crates to load, and then they’d be off. You couldn’t see Zoro anywhere, so there was only one thing left to do: you invaded the ship.

Running up the gangway and ignoring the shouts of the crew on the dock, you stood at the center of the ship’s deck and rounded in a circle, eyes scouring for that green-haired little bitch. 

Chest heaving, you nearly whimpered when you still couldn’t see him. Would you have to search the whole ship, turning everything upside down? 

You jumped when a hand clamped down on your arm, and you whirled around to find not Zoro, but a very tall, very surly man with a single scar running from his left eye to his jaw. His grip on you was enough to send a shock of fear through you.

“I don’t take kindly to stowaways,” he barked. “And really, you’re not even trying to hide. At least commit to it if you’re thinkin’ of hitchin’ a ride on my ship.”

As you gulped and stared up into his darkly narrowed eyes, there was really only one thing on your mind. “Where is Roronoa Zoro?”

The captain of the ship gaped, and before he could get out another word, a very familiar man rushed down from the helm, a frustrated set in his brow.

You were in no mood for his temper. In a swift motion you broke away from the captain and stormed over to meet Zoro halfway. “There you are, son of a bitch.”

Zoro’s heart was in his head, worried about the deathly glare you now gave him. He steeled himself and started, “I told you—”

“How dare you!” You shoved at his chest, barely knocking him back as crimson tendrils creeped in your vision. “Is this really how you want to leave things?”

He stood solemn, eyes almost sad as they met with yours. “I thought it would be best.”

“For who?” You couldn’t deny the break of your heart, the pieces of it under the sole of his boot. You hoped he saw it on your face. You hoped he acknowledged the damage he’s doing. 

The captain awkwardly came up behind you. “Your lass is gonna have to pay for passage, Roronoa.”

“I’m not coming.” “She’s not staying.”

The pair of you kept in a dangerous staring match, your words overlapping.  

Still, the captain shuffled on his feet, saying, “Listen, we have a schedule—”

You whirled on him, locking him in place with a single glare. “Give us a minute.” Then, with more sympathy, “Please.”

The captain sighed, rolling his eyes and waving it off as he continued to prepare to depart.

There was little ignoring the curious stares from the ship’s crew as you slowly turned back to Zoro. “You’re a coward.”

“I know.”

“I’m not done,” you said, holding up a hand to stop him. Zoro’s lips snapped shut, his gaze lowering for a moment before he brought it back up, waiting for the blows of your anger. 

You took a breath, and finally, “I get why I can’t go with you. I’m a liability. You can’t become the world’s greatest swordsman if you’re busy keeping me alive.” You took a step closer, partially because of the eavesdroppers all around and partially because you wanted to be near him as long as you could.

“So I’ll stay. I'll live and train with Vee and become the greatest fucking apothecary Syrup Village has ever seen. And maybe I’ll even forgive you for trying to leave without a goodbye, if you can tell me why.”

He shifted uncomfortably. “Why what?”

You could have screamed at this man you had the displeasing pleasure of falling in love with. “Why do you care so much?”

“You know why,” he said, stubborn as always. Only, maybe he wasn’t being stubborn, you considered as something like hesitation hovered in his gaze. 

Still, you persisted. “No, I wanna hear you say it.” You reached out for him, gently setting a hand on his arm to ease some of his tension. “I wanna hear the words come out of your mouth before you sail away from me.”

“You make it sound so definite,” he said, huffing a laugh as he forced a pained smile.  

“Zoro.”

His deep eyes burned into you as his hands rose to softly caress your jaw, his hold featherlight. The spinning of the world began to still, the earth on its axis slowing to allow you just enough time. He got impossibly closer, breaking your anger down to a soft annoyance. You really couldn’t help but lean into his touch.

“Not like this,” Zoro murmured. “When I tell you how I feel, it’s gonna be when I have the time to show you.”

You rested your palms on the hands that cradled your face. “I’m impatient.”

He only grinned, though it barely reached his eyes. “I know.”

You couldn’t bear to waste this precious time crying, choking down the fire in your throat. You teased, “So what I’m hearing is that you like me too much to leave me stranded forever?”

“Something like that,” he said, hands drifting to your waist.

From somewhere behind him, the captain bellowed, “Roronoa!”

“I know!” Zoro called back, never removing himself from you. He pursed his lips before enveloping you in a hug that nearly knocked the breath out of you. “I’m… I’m sorry. For everything.”

Your fingers carded through his hair. You hid your face in his neck. Anything to relish the feeling of his arms around you. “I suppose I forgive you.” Squeezing him closer, “Just promise to write.”

Pulling away, he pressed his forehead to yours. “I promise.”

You cupped his jaw in your hands and locked with his eyes. “I'll get stronger. I'll come find you someday, or you'll come back, or—something. But we’ll sail together again. Swear it to me.”

He couldn’t help the smirk twitching at the corners of his lips. Then, Zoro did as you asked. “I, Roronoa Zoro, swear that we will sail again.”

“Good,” you said, voice finally cracking under the pressure building in your chest. 

Somewhere in the village, the morning bell rang true. The sun was fully up over the horizon line. Not a cloud disturbed the bluer-by-the-second sky. A perfect day for sailing, you mused. 

You stepped away, swiping at your eyes, and smiled as best you could. It was watery, most likely, and conveyed every bit of your melancholy. Casting a look over his shoulder you saw the captain standing there, ticked and holding up his wristwatch. The breath you let out was shaky as you turned back to Zoro.

“Goodbye,” you said, as if that word did this feeling any justice. Before he could say a word in return, you’d lunged forward to press your lips to his cheek, your hands steadying yourself on his biceps. It was quick, nothing but a peck, and enough to make you lose your nerve instantly.

Skin warm and grinning like a fool, you pivoted in a whirl and made for a quick escape, only getting two steps away when an arm hooked around your middle and pulled you back into a broad chest. Zoro’s breath was loud in your ear, so loud you could hear his goofy smile before you saw it. 

Your back still hurt like hell, yet nothing could sway the stretch of your lips as you swiveled in his embrace, finding yourself once again in between his arms. In an instant, memories of months gone by haunted your eyes; memories of nights spent sleepless, only filled with the soft graze of his fingers against your arm; of nights in hasty argument over trivial things such as money or fleeting jealousy; and of moments so dear they nearly felt domestic.

And when he drew you into a feverish kiss, his hands clawing at your shirt to just get a grip of you, the sensation of lips on lips made it feel as though he truly was breathing in your soul and giving you his own in turn, the two energies intermingling in a promise sealed with love and lust and labor. 

Your ears were ringing when you registered the morning bells had stopped, and you retreated from the moment. Zoro squeezed your hips, eyes shut as he sightlessly pecked your lips again, then pressed a kiss to your forehead. You leaned up and peppered a few kisses to his jaw.

Finally, time had had its fill of freezing, and commands to depart from port were barked out.

Meeting your eyes, Zoro sighed out another apology before tugging you in one last time, his arms wrapping you up in a warm embrace that had your stitches crying out again. You grimaced despite yourself.  “Injured. Still injured.”

He laughed, and you swore you’d get drunk on the sound if you weren’t too careful. 

"I'll come back," he whispered in your ear. "I'll be the greatest swordsman and you'll be the greatest apothecary in the world."

"That's quite the duo."

“Lass!” called the captain, standing next to the gangway, preparing to pull it in. “You goin’?”

“Yes,” you said, breathless as you took Zoro’s hand, kissed his palm, and turned away before it was too late. You ran off the ship, down the gangway, and far off into the docks. Your head wanted to run back to Vee’s little house and woe around the rest of the day. Your heart wanted something else entirely.

Like you’d been caught in the gut, you froze, instantaneously backtracking in a sprint to the edge of the docks. The ship taking Zoro away was a good way out, but not far enough to block your voice. 

Cupping your hands around your mouth: “Zoro! Roronoa Zoro!”

That mop of moss green hair appeared at the ship’s railing. You grinned from ear to ear and bellowed, “I’m impatient! I love you, Zoro! I love you!”

At such a distance, you couldn’t see his exact reaction, and he couldn’t hear the whispers of the passersby that broke out at such a confession. But he’d heard your every word, his hands gripping the railing like he thought he might slip through the wood of the deck and fall right into the belly of the ocean. 

A few sailors whooped and hollered and one dared to clap him on the shoulder, and he would have severed that hand from the man had it not been for the red hot affection coursing through his veins. You were waving, and so he raised his hand and limply waved back.

He would be writing to you the moment he got a hold of some paper, Zoro decided. Until then, he stood at the edge of the ship, watching Syrup Village and Gecko Island and you grow smaller and smaller, and then gone. 

There was a tightening around his lungs, and as he retreated into the depths of the ship, he knew his heart had remained on land with you. One day, when you were healed and he was strong enough to make sure you never got injured again, he’d have his heart back, and you along with it.

Until then, your paths diverged, to be met once again some years later. 

જ⁀➴

Nami’s little ship taking on water was the least ideal occurrence possible. Yet, deep inside, Zoro found it incredibly funny to watch the orange haired girl scramble around all frustrated like this. 

“Gecko Islands,” said Nami, drawing Zoro out of his thoughts. She was hunched over her map with Luffy over her shoulder, per usual. “I think we’ll be able to make it before the ship sinks.”

Those words took longer to process than they should’ve, but Zoro couldn’t help it. Gecko Islands? How long had it been, three years maybe? No longer than that, he was sure. His eyes went unfocused at the memory of a laugh that could easily end him and bring him back to life all at once.

“Swear it to me.”

“I, Roronoa Zoro, swear that we will sail again.”

Nami nodded to herself, saying, “Syrup Village is known for its ships. I say we dock there and ditch this junk.”

He couldn’t believe that luck. Zoro’s lips threatened to quirk into a grin before he got a hold of himself. He rested his hand on his swords and snuffed. “I’ve got a friend in Syrup Village who could help us.”

Nami took off her readers and rolled up her map. “You have friends?”

He shot her a tight smirk. “Just one.”

“And he can help us?” asked Luffy as he took to the ship’s helm. 

“She might.” Zoro checked on a knot here and a rope there. With his back to his temporary crew, he let out a small smile. “If she’s happy to see me.”

A surprised grin took Nami's face. “And if she isn’t?”

“She will be,” he assured, only half certain, if he was being honest.

It'd been three years since his promise, after all. Whatever happened next, Zoro could only be certain of one thing: oh, how he missed you.

[dreadsuitsamus]

Will | Vegeta x Reader |

author's note: this is for the always lovely @miss-taura! i hope you're starting to feel better, or that you start getting better quickly!! rest and hydrate 🩷

pairing: vegeta x fem!reader

warnings: saiyan!reader, illness, mentions of death, mentions of frieza doing frieza things

Anxiety clings to Vegeta's stomach as he marches to your room on the Frieza station— you weren't at dinner tonight. It's unlike you, unlike any Saiyan warrior, and worry nags the Prince to his bones.

Of the Saiyans left, you're certainly his favorite. The bar is low, with your competition being Nappa and the Radish-boy, but you're still quite the cut above them. And your lack of presence is irritating, rude, and above all worth a princely tantrum.

Pounding on your door, his patience is too worn thin to properly wait for an answer. You haven't responded with the half second between his harsh knocks, so obviously he's got every single right to invite himself in. It's dark but his scouter clearly marks your exact position in your bed, and he hears your soft groan as the light from the hall floods in.

"What the hell, 'Geets?" Congestion plagues your sinuses, and a fever leaves you with harsh shivers as you glare at Vegeta with blurry eyes.

Vegeta scoffs and narrows his eyes as he steps further in, kicking the door shut behind him. "More like what the hell is up with you. You skipped dinner."

You cough into your shirt, flopping down pathetically onto your pillow. "I'm not hungry."

"A Saiyan is always hungry." Vegeta's arms cross over his broad chest as he tilts his head— he's not sure if he's ever seen you sick, or anybody else on this ship, for that matter.

A cold trickle of fear suddenly drips down his spine; Frieza certainly would find no use in nursing any of his army back to health, and absolutely wouldn't tolerate a particular bug spreading amongst the force.

He can't lose you like this.

Too tired to argue with him, you wave a hand in Vegeta's general direction. "Leave me be, 'Geets."

Vegeta nearly growls— you're far too uncaring. Do you have a death wish? He storms out of the room and you're far too ill to wonder what's gotten into him before another terrible coughing fit assaults you again.

Your consciousness fades in and out, though the next time you come to for longer than mere seconds, it's at Vegeta's shaking of your shoulder. His touch isn't particularly gentle, the rare occurrence never really is, but you can feel his effort of holding back. "Mmm…?"

"Sit up and eat, and take this too." A platter from the dining hall sits on the nightstand beside your bed, and a small caplet is flicked your way.

"Where did you find medicine?" Throat scratchy and burning at even breathing, a soft cough follows your question.

"It matters not. Just use it."

So he broke an international law somewhere, got it.

Your legs rub together unconsciously, begging the resulting friction for warmth. A Saiyan rarely feels so chilled, but it's as if you're iced to your very bones. Vegeta's jaw ticks and he doesn't put much thought into the why before he's stripped off a glove and pressed the back of his rarely-revealed hand against your forehead. His memories of his mother are frighteningly fading, but that is one of the few that holds strong and he can clearly remember of his late mother. He was young and felt awful for perhaps the first time in his life, and her gentle hand measuring his fever did wonders as a cure compared to all the bedrest and tonics.

Your watery eyes meet with Vegeta's as he moves to touch each cheek, his knuckles dragging along your skin and bumping over your nose. Eyes guarded, he turns his head and pulls back his palm. "You're running a fever. Eat now, and take the medicine. You're to be cured by tomorrow, understand?"

This motherfucker is giving my illness orders!

Opting for a dumb nod, your attention focuses on what he's brought you. Nothing too capable of potentially upsetting your stomach, it's easy to devour even with your fatigue crawling back by the second and the shivering from your fever slowly icing you more and more. You can hardly even notice Vegeta's too-quiet demeanor as he stares a hole into the carpeted floor, though to not see such a stoic side of the rather bratty, barbarous man that typically wears a smile of evil would be impossible.

"Done." Voice hardly capable of more than a whisper now, you set the plate aside and, large pill laid out on your tongue, finish off the first of the gallons of water he's thoughtfully provided you.

"Rest." His order is swift and gruff as he turns to leave, but your voice, quiet and unsure, calls for him to linger just a bit longer.

"T-Thank you, V-Vegeta." The tremors of your body are harsh enough to make your teeth audibly clash together, and the thin blanket wrapped around you couldn't possibly be enough to dispel this fever.

Breaking the fever will allow the medicine to work, and a little sigh pulls from his lips. You certainly always manage to break down a barrier he places, and usually it's fully unintentional and unknowing. But he cannot lose the last woman in his life, the last of the Saiyan race, and that's what has him stripping to his underwear and climbing into bed with you.

"'Geets…"

"Speak not a word further. Rest." He grumbles and unravels your wrapped form, inserting himself under the blanket with you. The heat radiating from him nearly makes your head spin as you grab the Prince's body despite how unbecoming this all is. The touch of his body isn't exactly foreign, though it certainly is in the manner of comfort rather than the training you've always known.

Vegeta's hold is tight. It's his duty as your Prince to keep you alive, though the warming of his cheeks when he gets a glimpse of your sleeping face suggests to himself it may not be as noble as he wishes.

[fansids]

Shadow of the King Au Art Dump

Since I very rarely get past the sketching phase any presentable art is rare, but I managed to find some for ya'll

Warning for some old ass art:

1. The Stalwart Generals

I spent an ungodly amount of time figuring out the designs, dynamics, and personalities of all of these monkies so I'll be damned if I don't show them first.

The Generals take care of anything SWK is unable to. They are in charge of FFM when he's not present.

Marshal Ma - While technically all the generals are the same rank, Marshal Ma is considered SWK's unofficial second in command. She's calm in every crisis with a very low bs tolerance and is 75% of the reason why the island doesn't fall to chaos every time SWK leaves. She's highly respected by all the inhabitants and can and will break your spine Bane style if the situation calls for it.

Marshal Liu - Mean bisexual. Marshal Ma's sister and the bane of her existence. On duty she takes her role very seriously. Off duty she likes to keep Ma on her toes with her dumbassery. She's easy going, hates clothes, and loves to fight. She has a slightly concerning amount of knives on her person at all times. She is big gay for General Beng.

General Beng - Meaner lesbian. A siamang and the largest and tallest of the generals. She enjoys dressing up, tea (both kinds), and a good party. She has a very short fuse. While her size and strength alone would generally deter anyone from testing her temper, there are always idiots. She can fight, but she knows her Liu would enjoy it more.

General Ba - The youngest of the generals. While she's not shy, she is very quiet. She does not waste her words. But, when she speaks, the others will stop whatever they're doing to listen. She likes to spend her free time in the libraries. Get her in the right mood and she'll argue with you for hours about the most random subjects.

.

2. Macaque face evolution

Was trying to get a feel for Macaque's face and how it changes throughout the au. Top right is the youngest, bottom right is the oldest. Bro gets all sorts of messed up from the whole died and resurrection thing and very much looks wrong afterwards.

.

3. New fit

Macaque and SWK have the whole cape thing going on, I figured SWK gave Mac one of his own when he was still training under him. I like to think it holds a lot of sentimental value to him since he still wears it in present day but he would rather get his head smashed in again than admit it.

.

4. I'm sure this won't come back to bite anyone later

Eeesh. Imagine spending your whole life training to receive and keep the Sun Wukong's attention only for him to casually give it to some random human boy thousands of years later. I mean, Macaque did betray him and everything, but it's the principle.

.

5. The Tongbi Gibbon Concepts

One of the four world-wrecking/celestial monkies. My brain was very focused on the whole pulling celestial bodies out of the sky part of her abilities that I made her based around that line.

Don't know if this fit is still canon as she and the Horse Monkey had a large role to play in Shadow of the King, and I'm considering if I should take them out

.

Bonus:

I consider the Tongbi gibbon and the Horse Monkey to be older than both Sun Wukong and Macaque in Shadow of the King. The Horse Monkey is the eldest, but the Tongbi's age is nothing to sniff at.

That being said, that does not mean she can't be bought.

Takes place after all the traumatizing shit in SotK

Panel 1

Tongbi: Child, I am an ancient being. I hold the power of gods within me. I was witness to the birth of the Great Sage himself. I have seen nations and empires rise and fall. I have gathered and spent innumerable wealth. Yet you think you can bribe me with 20 yuan?

Panel 2

The host: ...how 'bout 30?

Panel 3

Off-panel (Horse Monkey): TONGBI!!

MK: I thought the nimbus made you airsick

Red Son: Not helping, Noodle Boy

Tongbi: BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!

[seimsisk]

turns out I need to rant about House some more

see I have this friend who hates House because she's a woman with zero patience for asshole protagonists who everybody loves for no reason, which is fine, but then she watched some episodes and came to terrible no good very bad análises of the themes in House and everytime I think about it I get mad and ranty but I have no one to rant to

(like this was some three months ago. but my rant-brain doesn't know how to move on)

my friend seems to be under the impression that the core character trait of House (the character) is being an asshole, and that the episode where he talks about his teenage experience of meeting a genius doctor who everybody hated is some kind of badly written origin story of why he decided to be an asshole. which is a very upsetting analysis because of how unkind it is - it only makes sense of you assume the writing is bad

and it pisses me off first of all because that story was an explanation not of why house is an asshole but of why he's a doctor. totally different thing. and the reason he's a doctor is that he found out that doctors and respected even when they are hated.

so I would say House's core trait is not that he's an asshole exactly, but that he is hated. He's used to being hated, he doesn't try to not be hated, he hates himself even, and he genuinely believes that he is only tolerated because of his skills as a doctor. which is painfully relatable tbh.

house isn't just an asshole, he's a huge misfit who has come to the conclusion that trying to fit in is pointless and painful. he's a genius weirdo in too much pain to give a shit. he's chronically depressed but afraid treatment will dull his mind. he's an addict who argues that he needs his addiction to function (up until he accidentally almost kills someone). he's so obviously Neuro divergent that the show has like three separate episodes based around parallels between House and a neurodivergent and/or mentally disabled patient, and in each of them House is seen low-key envying those patients because they are not expected to behave like neurotypicals the way he is which is also painfully relatable. he's and asshole to everyone and he's extra special asshole to (neurotypical) people with physical disabilities (like he has), but he is genuinely kind and gentle to people with neurodivergencies and mental illnesses. also to whores. I think the thing is, if society hates you for who you are and how you behave, House immediately adopts you like a stray puppy, just like he adopts that sick rat Steve.

I was going somewhere with this but I forgot where. might continue rant later

[carlsdarling]

Hello friend! Can you do some Carl x reader with high functioning adhd pls? By hug functioning, I mean intense mood swings, extremely forgetful, super low stress tolerance, gets frustrated very easily, etc. Maybe with a bit of smut :)? 💜

Carl x ADHD! Reader headcanons

Y/N has ADHD, but Carl has gotten used to it... Everyone is 18 or over.

WARNINGS: lowkey smut, nsfw

When everyone else is annoyed by your constant restlessness, Carl doesn't mind at all; he's always suggesting activities - usually sex first, of course he means it totally unselfishly *cough*.

Carl and you share a bedroom, so he inevitably notices when you can't sleep again. While the bed is big enough that he could just shift away from you and sleep himself, if he's not completely exhausted and passed out, he'll stay awake with you; you'll watch movies, kiss, sleep with each other, and play video games until you're eventually able to fall asleep.

Carl isn't particularly tidy himself, but he often cleans up after you - especially in the bathroom, because Rick and Michonne get annoyed when one of you leaves it messy.

Carl is used to you not being able to sit still and constantly rocking your feet, crossing your legs, biting your fingernails, and not being able to concentrate on anything. When being active is not possible, for example at important meetings in Alexandria, Carl takes your hand and holds it.

He reminds you of the things you forget. While Denise has taught you to write lists to structure yourself and your daily routines, you often misplace those lists or completely forget to write them at all.

Other people think you babble too much, too fast, and too much nonsense. Carl doesn't mind, he thinks it's cute.

Carl finds your mood swings interesting because they are so unpredictable. He sometimes teases you about it ("Are you on your period again? Okay, at least you're not pregnant then.").

When you're out in the woods or on a scavenging trip, you never run out of energy - Carl admires and envies you for it.

Carl has taught you a few techniques to calm down and focus. For example, he's picked up books on autogenic training and meditation and practiced that with you. But his favorite way to relax and relieve stress remains sex. Not that you would feel any different. You two literally can't keep your hands off each other, and at times your libido is even greater than Carl's - not that he is bothered by that, he likes to sacrifice himself for the good thing....

Rick often gets upset that you are erratic and inattentive during your guard duties. He initially didn't understand what ADHD even meant until Carl calmly explained it to him. Since then, Rick has been more understanding of your moods, and you're always assigned to guard duty with Carl or Enid, since they're the two who can handle you best.

Some foods - especially cola or coffee - exacerbate your ADHD, so Carl tries to keep you away from it what you don't like. You argue about this a lot.

Carl likes your tics. To him, that makes you special.

You have anger attacks in which you lose your temper and throw objects. Carl then holds you tight, presses you against him and murmurs soothing words in your ear until it's over.

--

Tags: @loveforcarl @knochentrocken0808 @taylormarieee @tessasweet @enid-rhee-things

[narislvr]

-> PALESTINE RESOURCES (don't skip.)

,, ellie williams x latina!/mex!reader hcs ⤹˚˖♬୭

,, cws? afab and mainly mexican coded reader | fluff ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹

ᝰ.ᐟ nari note : 1.) thank you so much for the overwhelming support on my works it really means a lot. This is yet another self indulgent post but hopefully other mex/latina ellie fans enjoy this too ♡ 2.) I will be continuing to post my writing every now and then, however, I will continue to be posting things regarding Palestine and will be linking resources on whatever non-palestine post I make in order to continue to spread awareness.

' ' Que simplemente puedo decir yo,

Que eres lo mas bonito, que he visto en toda mi vida , ,

˖♬୭ she's a shameless duolingo user. Like, she's very serious about doing the lessons, scoffing whenever you laugh at her while shes doing her lessons on the couch next to you, volume all the way up as she mumbles the phrases under her breath, repeating them even when shes not doing the lessons.

"what? I wanna impress la suegra next time we go visit."

˖♬୭ speaking of which, she made sure that she left a good impression with your parents the moment she met them, or atleast tried. she was so nervous to meet them, especially with the whole language barrier thing, but she was quick to call your parents her suegros, taking them by surprise at first but they quickly grew to like her.

ellie and your mom fr

˖♬୭ she adores your mom, always offering to help out in the kitchen even if she has no idea what to do. she has a low spice tolerance, but you best believe she's trying the mole when your mom asks her to taste it.

"esta.. muy bueno..!" she'd say, sniffling as she leans onto your side and offers your mom a smile. you'd tease her about it later, and she'd reply with a 'it wasn't that spicy."

˖♬୭ she likes the Carne asadas your family has now and then, finding the music, food, and just the amount of family being there comforting. she didn't have much of a sense of community other than joel growing up so it was something she welcomed once the two of you became serious and she spent more time with your family.

˖♬୭ You'll either find her running around playing with the kids or joining the men playing pirinola or with the tias in loteria. If she happens to win, she'll run up to you, a cheeky grin on her face as she wraps an arm around your shoulders.

"Told you I'd win. Got ten dollars to treat ya' with, what you want tomorrow?"

˖♬୭ she found it an honor the first time she got to be in charge of the piñata. though she made it easy on the little kids so that they could hit it, she didn't hesitate to pull the piñata out of reach for the big kids when it was their turn.

˖♬୭ The first time you brought ellie to a quienceañera she was stunned, in a good way of course. Again, she was in awe of how everyone played a part in making it happen, and would definitely ask you all about yours as she wished she had met you sooner so that she could have been a part of it.

Ellie didn't know how to dance, not being able to do much more than sway to the rhythm, so when she saw the way you looked at the dance floor, she tried her best to push you to go even if it was without her. she really didn't want to embarrass herself in front of your family, and she didn't want to hold you back, but you were too stubborn to leave her.

"C'mon, el's, it'll be funnn. I'll guide you the whole time, okay?" you'd argue, tugging at her hand with a reassuring look. And how could she say no when you looked at her like that? With a small nod, she gets up, her hand in yours as you lead her towards the dance floor.

Huapango played in the background, as she watched your eyes illuminate, your arms wrapping around her shoulders as you smiled up at her.

"It's just little steps like this, okay? Yeah.. like that.. see? You're a natural!"

You lead her through the dance, not opting for a spin yet as you swayed your hips to rhythm. To say Ellie was an awe would be an understatement. You looked so comfortable like this, radiant, nothing compared to her shakey awkward steps as she tried to keep up with you.

"One day I'm gonna spin you like that couple over there.. You gotta keep teaching me though, alright?" She'd respond, eyes locked with yours as her hands gently squeezed your sides. You smile at this, nodding as you place a kiss against her cheek before reaching for the cowboy hat and placing it on her head with a chuckle.

"alright."

PALESTINE RESOURCES

[onskepa]

Hiii,I got a request.

So one of the dynamics I'm really interested in seeing in the next movie is the one between Neytiri and Spider.

So the plot would be something like they go to gather some herb that can only be found in a small crevice,so Mo’at asks Spider to retrieve it for her. Since everyone is occupied and the plant is far from the village, Mo’at asks Neytiri to take him there, and after a small argument of being against it, she does.

Only for some reason, they swap species (maybe some plant is at fault for that), like Neytiri turns human and Spider turns na’vi, but only them and no one else.

They go and hide in a shack that's close to them ( or somewhere)  so no one sees them, so they spend the day together, and they have a heart to heart conversation.

They have a newfound understanding of each other after all of this, and while not on super amicable terms yet, they start getting there.

When they wake up the next day they have changed back (Neytiri consoling Spider a bit cause he had everything he wanted just for a bit, but he also is happy for her at the same time)

Helloooooooo cutie patootie~!! Honestly this is a really cool idea to explore thoroughly. Now I know everyone has their own personal opnnions of how their relationship can go, or alternatives. BUT! This will be my version of how I think if might go. Hopfully this is yours and everyones satisfaction~!!

-------------

New body, fresh eyes

[cover made by meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!]

Another calm day at the relatively peaceful day in the Omatikaya forest. People doing their duties to the village, or relaxing and enjoying the beautiful day. It was tranquil, calm, and everyone can tell it will be a good day. Mo’at certainly does. There was not much to do on this bright day. So she decided to go out and collect some herbs as she is running low on some. 

So getting her baskets and needed tools, she makes her way through the village. Everyone she passes greets her with respect and joy. She likes seeing her people be in high spirits, it brings her mind at peace. 

“You are doing it wrong!”

“Kiri taught me! So I know I am doing it right!” 

“You are better off with those demons!” 

“Too bad! I'm here to stay!” 

Now if only mo’at can say the same for her inner family. 

“Can you two stop arguing for 5 minutes?” Jake asks as he groans in frustration. Lately neytiri and spider have been at each other's throats. More than usual. Rubbing his eyes, it's too damn early to deal with it. Don't get Jake wrong, he loves neytiri very much. So much, but at times her dislike for spider can be a bit much, even for him. 

And it is clear as day, everyone else is also getting tired too. 

“I'm literally just existing!” Spider shouts his excuse, waving his arms around as if to prove his point. 

Neytiri hisses and rolls her eyes. 

Mo’at sees this and joins Jake's side. Both share the same feelings of this ongoing dispute. This has to stop before it escalates even more. 

Mo’at doesn't hate the boy, she tolerates him and doesn't mind his presence. Would often welcome him to a light meal or show him some healing methods should he get hurt somewhere in the forest. 

Looking down at her basket, mo’at got an idea. 

So while neytiri and spider go for a round who knows how many of arguing, mo’at whispers in jake’s ear of her idea. And the more he listens, the more he is willing to comply.

“You cannot be serious! Both of you!” Neytiri shouts in anger. 

“Baby, you know I love you with all my heart and soul, but believe me, this is a good idea,” Jake says with his arms crossed, his stance showing he isnt going to back down. Mo’at stands beside him, her glare not changing. 

“She is going to end my life if we do this,” Spider says in a panicked/worried tone. He really doesn't want to do this, especially with neytiri. 

“Hush, it won't be a terrible experience. All you both have to do is go to the upper saves to collect the white shell flowers. I need you spider to go since you are small enough to enter, and neytiri I need you to make sure he comes to and back safely” mo’at instructs. 

But before either neytiri or spider begin to protest, Jake held his hand up as to silence them.

“It is decided, there is no way out of this. That is final”

Oh what could go wrong?

“Keep up!” Neytiri angrily demands, spider grunts as his feet are starting to sore. Ever since they left the village, Neytiri has been demanding him non-stop, telling him to hurry up, to not be slow or some animal will end him. Purposely walking faster and climbing on near impossible spots. Purposely making spider struggle more than he usually does. 

“I'm trying!” he shouts back as he climbs over a very big root. He hasn't felt this tired since race climbing with the other na’vi boys. And that was a long while ago. And to make things not so appealing, they are not even halfway to the destination. 

“Is this what uncle means by final destination…?” he thinks. 

If that is true, may Eywa grant him mercy and join her in the afterlife.

“Are you done being dramatic?” Neytiri asks suddenly, interrupting his thoughts. 

She stood not far from him, clearly not amused. 

Quickly spider catches up to her, “nothing, how far are we?” he asks, “too far” neytiri asks annoyed. Inwardly sighing, he catches up, as fast he can't. This will be a long walk for sure.

“We are here” 

What felt like forever they finally made it to the upper caves. It really wasn't that far from the hallelujah mountains but it takes a bit to get to a really specific area. And that specific area was no easy task. But what matters now is they made it.

“Hurry up, get in!” Neytiri once again hisses and impatiently shoves spider in the small cave. Spider was quick to duck his head down so as to not hit himself against the rocky entrance. The baskets landed near his feet, so he grabbed them without a word. Going a bit deeper, he sees the beautiful glowing green flowers. 

According to what mo’at said, they needed to be very careful as the flowers can only function in the dark. Any beam of light hitting them and its over. So neytiri shoves some special baskets that are weaved very tightly and no light can get past it. 

But also….

“How many did the tsahik say to get?” spider asks to neytiri. The na’vi in question paused for a moment. Did her mother specify how much to get? Little or a lot? Damn. 

“Enough to fill the baskets” she said in a snappy tone. 

“Yes ma’am…” so spider gets onto it. As he gently plucks the flowers, a bit of the nectar escaped from the bud and leaked onto his hands. Smearing his fingers a bit, it was sticky yet warm at the same time. Made his hands glow a bit. 

“What is taking so long!? Hurry it up in there! We won't make it back before dark!” neytiri screeches. Her time with spider grows increasingly thin. She just wanted to get it done and over with. Being near him makes neytiri’s skin prickle and shudder. 

“Puny demon…” she mutters under her breath. Looking down, the roots that connect the small cave to the base aren't that thick. Her blade is sharp enough to cut them. If she manages to grab the baskets, she can cut the roots and spider can be stuck in the air. Forever maybe….

“Ok I think this is enough” spider comments to himself. Collecting the baskets, he triple checks they are sealed very tightly and slings them over his back. “I need a bath after this…” looking down at his glowing hands, and some parts of his body, the nectar was all over him. Spider did try to not have any flower leak as he plucked them but it was inevitable. 

“I'm coming!” he shouts, letting the echos reach neytiri’s ears as he makes his way to the exit of the cave. And just as he was about to come out, the sudden reach for the baskets surprised him. “Give them to me” neytiri demons, her eyes glaring daggers at him. Harshly she tried to yank them out of her grasp but spider was pulling back. Scared of whatever her motive is. 

“Stop! You are going to rip the baskets!!” he warns her but it has fallen on deaf ears. The na’vi was pulling them so hard, he worried the weaving will become undone, so using the still wet nectar, he smeared it all over neytiri’s face. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?” she yells. Tring to get the nectar out of her eyes while holding onto spider, she was losing balance. 

“No no no!!” 

Without warning, both began to fall from the small cave. Flying down fast, yells of panic and fear. They fell down to the forest, only to be hitting the flat grounds and instantly being knocked out.

Neytiri awoke to a burning, unbearable pain coursing through her body. Mostly at her throat. She can't break, why can't she breathe? It hurts so much! Her vision was blurry but even trying to open her eyes, she felt a slight stinging to them. She needed air and fast! Looking at her surroundings, she saw spider’s mask laying on the floor, maybe that could help? 

Crawling towards it, feeling the strength in her body weaken by the second. Quickly putting it on, she took deep breaths, calming her heart. 

After a few minutes, her full consciousness became present. Why did Neytiri need the boy’s mask? How was it that it fit her face? 

Looking down at her hands, her body, her hair, she screamed her soul out. 

Spider woke up startled, looking around to find the source of the blood curdling scream. He turned to see a human woman. She was panicking while looking down at her body. He had never seen her before but he couldn't leave her to her madness. 

“Hey hey, it's ok, it's ok, is your mask broken?” he suddenly asks while raising his hands but he noticed something…….

His hands were blue…his arms, legs, body, touching his ears, they were pointy. Was he….?

“Spider?!” the human woman called out to him, but hearing neytiri’s voice….?

“Neytiri….?” he calls out, she nodded. 

Both now silent, taking in each other’s appearance…..

Neytiri is human. And spider is na’vi. 

“Oh my Eywa….”

“OH MY EYWA!! OH MY-I THINK I'M GONNA THROW UP!!” spider says in his midst of panic. It is like he can't seem to fully comprehend what is happening. Here he is, standing at 10 '12 ft tall, with a tail, four fingers, and blue all over. 

“Please don't '' neytiri who isn't far from him begs. She was rocking back and forth trying to understand what happened. Her skin is deep tan, dark tones, her hair now wavy and standing at a good 5’7 ft tall. No tail, 5 fingers, round ears, and no stripes. Even she is trying not to vomit. 

Trying to be the adult between them, she gets up but notices something. She is naked, her na’vi clothing is too big for her. 

“Look…we must find some proper garments……and find shelter soon. It is getting dark” she says. 

Spider stops his mid life crises and listens to her. Looking down, he sees her point.

“Woa, this is incredible!” spider shouts in great glee! He can smell everything! He can see better, climb higher, run faster! He felt invincible at the moment. This is what he always dreamed of, always hoped to be. A true na’vi. No more silly mask, no more sleeping in the labs, no more risking his life to simple foods in the wilderness. He felt free. 

Neytiri on the other hand felt stuck. The mask was itchy, it was uncomfortable. She doesn't have the same amount of strength. Everything was too big or too high, climbing was hard, running even harder. Gets tired easily, and can't even enjoy her favorite fruit anymore! Is this what it is like for humans? Always tired? Danger everywhere? Is this what felt like being trapped?

“Don't you think maybe this could be something from Eywa?” spider asks, rather a bit tired but wondering behind their current situation. “Is she punishing us…?” He wonders more. Neytiri, who was sitting across from him, the fire pit in the middle of their small shelter. She narrows her eyes, the light of the fire reflecting in her eyes. 

“Don't be so ridiculous, why would she punish me? I have done nothing wrong” she replies in a rather stand-offish way. If spider still had his eyebrows, he would raise them.

Did nothing wrong?” he repeats but more as a question. 

He starts to count with his fingers, “you insult me, you belittle me, you bully me! You HATE me! When all I have done is try to live my life”. 

Neytiri glares at him, if she could hiss, she would. 

“You dare come to my home, my village, my FAMILY! Dressing as if you were one of us!” 

“I am now,” he smirks. 

“Bah!” she scoffs, “whatever this is, don't think it will be forever!” 

“But what if it is? What if this is our new life? Me na’vi, you human?” spider questions. If it is true, he could life as a omatikaya. He could spend more time with kiri, lo’ak, spend more time and be one with the village. He could-

“Then I wouldn't be with my family….” neytiri whispers…..the horror crawling into her mind. If she is forever human, that means she would have to be with the other humans…away from her mate, away from her children! To be away from her home is wrong. To not be able to hunt or share a simple kiss would risk her life. This is like a cage in her own body. And to rely on the stupid mask…no she couldn't. 

“Neytiri…..why do you hate me…?” spider asks, bringing back the topic. 

Not making eye contact, rather staring at the fire, she slowly responds. 

“I dont hate you….I hate what you resemble…..that demon. That man. He took everything from me. When I see you, I see him. That is all I see. And I cannot look past him. I fear you would follow his trail. Resume what he could not finish. End me, ending my family. I cant…I belittle you, I say many things to you. I should not. I am aware. Yet my anger, my hate, my terrors. They overcome my vision. What I am supposed to see a child, all I can see is the darkness of my nights” 

Silence follows. The sparks of the fire filling it in. 

Neytiri’s words settled in spider’s mind.

“I always admired you…” spider suddenly spoke. 

He didn't look up, rather looking down at his hands. Busy creating something. 

“I always admired how strong you are. Despite losing everything…you remain strong, tough, fearless. And I always liked that. I liked how despite being hurt, you continue to fight. A mighty warrior is all I see. Yet you are a good mom. How you treat your kids….I always wanted a mom who can cuddle me, hold me, love me….I'm not saying I see you as a mother. But you are the closest thing to it. I am also scared of you…but I get mad. So mad that you treat me worse than all of the humans combined. All I ever wanted was just you to acknowledge me. That was all I ever wanted…” 

Neytiri didn't say anything. She only looks down at her hands. What can she say? Nothing, her answer was nothing. 

Sun rose and both were awake. Seeing that their new bodies are still there, they remain in the small shelter. 

“Ack!” neytiri groans in pain, she was trying to open a shell of a fruit but is struggling. 

“Need some help?” spider offers. 

“Im fine” neytiri snaps, not wanting to be bothered. So spider shrugs. But as he turned, he hissed in pain. Looking behind him, seems he stepped on his tail. Again. This will be taking some time to get used to. 

“OW!” 

“Ok let me show you” spider interjects neytiri. Though she is protesting, spider ignores that. “Here, with your small fingers you have to twist the top, not the bottom. It is easier and won't hurt” he instructs. Neytiri doesn't say anything, but does how he showed her. And the shell opened, showing the ripe fruit inside. She smiled in relief. She was so hungry. 

“Oh by the way, you cant eat that” spider says before she could take a bit. Raising an eyebrow, she questions him “and why not? I have always eatin this fruit”. 

“Yes, but you are human now. This fruit is not safe for humans. Eat if and you will have a bad reaction to it. Dont even test it, its not fun”..

So neytiri puts the fruit down. 

Damn.

“You are walking like a human,” neytiri points out. Spider tripped, again. Over his tail. Again. 

“If you still wish to keep your tail intact, dont drag on your legs behind, and dont mindlessly sway your tail side to side like some beast. Have proper manners” she goes on to say. 

Spider huffs, and getting up he follows her instructions. “You are na’vi now, so walk like one”. 

Carefully correcting his stand and pose, he tries again. “Hey look, I am-OW!” 

“What did I say?! You utter fool!”

“You pull the scales like this” neytiri instructs spider in how to removes the scales of some fishes they caught at a nearby river. Using her large blade, spider carefully does as she is teaching him. And as he does, neytiri was grinding some spices she managed to collect during their walk. 

“Add more of the red bark” spider comments. 

“Why?” 

“Because for the sake of your taste buds, it makes the fish meat be easier to consume” 

Back and forth, all day. Spider and neytiri help each other in getting used of their new bodies. New habits had to be learned, new styles and methods that can benefit the other. And all the while there was no yelling or harsh name calling. Things felt..ease. At peace. But for how long can this happen? Forever? 

Night came once again, and after a full meal, spider and neytiri rested. Spider taking in his hands, admiring his dots decorating his body. 

Neytiri does the same for her hair. 

“Here…..for you” spider whispers a bit shyly. He hands neytiri what looked like a headband. It was weaven together well. The weaving of the omatikaya. Beads embedded well with the blue hue. It was soft and the material looked to be well made. 

“Thank you….” she whispers. Putting it on, it fitted her perfectly. Of course not that she would admit. 

“Here….” this time neytiri hands spider tenbeads, four reds and two yellows. “Do what you like with them” she says. Spider gripped on the beads tightly. They felt nice and smooth on his palm. Seemed to be well carved and of good quality too. 

“Thank you…” he smiles. Cherishing his gift from her. Really the only act of kindless she has displayed to him. And by eywa he will keep it as a core memory until his last breathe. 

However, despite the gift exchange, there is still that looming worry. 

“It seems….this will be our new life now….me human, and you na’vi” neytiri says, sadness coating her words. 

“I now know it is not easy….to be human. I now know what challenges you must go throug spider….your struggles have ended….and now I will struggle but…..I accept. IF this is my new body forever…I accept” 

There. 

She admits it, neytiri finally admits it. 

Spider should feel happy, but he isnt. 

“As I accept…..being na’vi. Thanks to you, I now know it is not fully easy being na’vi either. So much noises…my tail, I love my tail but it has a mind of its own. But I accept I will be na’vi but…..it doesnt seem fair….” he says. 

Neytiri blinks, confused. 

“How is it not fair? You finally get to have the life you long desire” 

The boy bods, “Yes but…what if…the price to pay to life this life….the life I always wanted….comes at the cost of you? Arent you worried? Scared? You won't get to be with your family as much anymore. Having to eat shitty food, being indoors with all the technology you hate. It almost doesnt seem fair…” 

That is true…if neytiri must, she would be limited to all she has. 

“Nothing is really fair spider….but as you said…..if this is Eywa punishing….me. Then, I accept me punishment. My freedom in trade for yours…” 

Spider shook his head, “no, no that is not how it would end. I will gladly give up my na’vi body. I would go back to being human. I would give it all up, for you. You are a mother to 4 kids neytiri, they need you. They need you more than I need this body. IF Eywa can hear me, hear me now. I would gladly pay the price. My na’vi for neytiri’s humanity. I would!” 

By the bounds of all reality, the shell flowers from the forgotten baskets bursted out, and went straight towards them.

“I see them, look” mo’at smiles as she sees spider and neytiri coming to them. Jake sees as well, and smiles “I was starting to get worried”. 

And what a sight to hold on to. Spider and neytiri? Talking peacefully? Not screaming or yelling? 

“It seems it worked” jake comments. Mo’at nods, “of course, great mother always knows the right solution to any matter”

PHEW! This one took me a bit, wanted to get all the right words and emotions just right. But I am once again proud how it turned out! Thank you cutie for requesting this! Until next time! See ya!

[artsy-hobbitses]

Just finished watching X-Men 97 Ep 7 (I love having a series to look forward to on a weekly basis again! Excited to get a good dinner and sit down for half and hour of getting WHIPLASHED by all the new reveals and emotions. It's such a nice thing to look forward to inthe mid-week slog as well)!!!

Thoughts and spoilers below!

They REALLY went all out with Gambit's funeral, and it was nice seeing Nightcrawler carrying out priest rites for the brother-in-law he could have had. Jubilee's anguished anger at Rogue not being there HURT

Holy shit ROGUE. VERY Rogue-centric episode, and it's pain pain PAIN evbery other minute. Her absolute disdain for Captain America not wanting her to be on his team to check out Gyrich because of the tense situation/'optics' is 100% understandable, I stand by women's rights and Rogue's Wrongs in this case. Also her backhanding him with the "America's Top Cop" label, she taking no prisoners this week.

Beast gently but sternly calling out Trish the reporter about how 'tolerance' simply isn't enough anymore and it was a low bar to set for mutant-human relations to begin with, and how he's aghast at the idea of having to give a calming/professional sound byte or something to try and quell mutant protests and demonstrations worldwide after what happened, after MILLIONS OF THEM DIED is. Very relevant. To certain current events. He's been trying SO HARD to be the sweet, professional one, but he is tired and he is sad and he doesn't have it in him to ask for the bare minimum anymore or tell his people they don't have the right to feel the way they do.

We get Diamond Emma! No clue as to whether the massacre has changed her outlook on life since her appearance was during a brief rescue moment where Cyclop's hopes that Madelyne could have survived (Jean said she could feel a telepath under all the rubble) got crushed, but hopefully that'll be answered in the next ep!

Sunspot finally coming clean to his mum about him being a mutant! She seems like a very sweet lady who clearly loves him and takes it VERY WELL, but immediately she's like "Our family is established and in the spotlight, your father's business can't afford this sort of publicity. The world won't accept you, especially given what happened, so we have to find a way to hide this from the public, and that includes cultivating a list of people you can associate with". Which feels like it could be relevant to today's queer acceptance where it's like "On a personal basis I love you and accept you for who you are, BUT..." as an evolution from the X-Men movie's "Have you ever tried... not being a mutant?"

There is a LOT of talk about 'optics' in this episode, which feels VERY TIMELY. And VERY POINTED. How President Kelly apparently wants to send aid to Genosha, but doesn't do it to the fullest extent because he's worried about the political optics from 'normal humans' who are now afraid of an all out human-mutant war, and argues that he's doing his best here and that he needs suppport to stay in office to ensure a 'worse' person for mutant advocacy doesn't step in (I'm not going to lie. Very Democrat argument for why their man should stay in office---look at the boogieman who might be there if they aren't, instead of dealing with issues head-on) . And Cyclops's civil but seething rage at that because this is NOT a time for subtleties or politicking MILLIONS OF MY PEOPLE ARE DEAD.

Nightcrawler comforting Rogue and letting her just bawl openly in his arms during Day of the Dead ;; My heart.

Rogue kills a man. Or, helps him to his death, I'm not sure how you categorize this when Trask was already attempting to jump off a building out of guilt anyway, and she stepped in to stop him, only to let go when he said he had no other info for her (she had initially told him to help them to redeem himself). Again, 100% understandable, I support Rogue's Wrongs, and I LOVE how dark they're taking this, watching our girl step closer and closer to the abyss from her rage and grief and just plunging into it. Also her screaming that Trask deserved it for killing a great man, "MY MAN!!!!!". Whoof.

KNEW Mags wasn't dead. Going to be fun seeing WHAT Bastion plans to do with him now.

Again, STELLAR episode, a good 9/10 from me!

[honeybeezgobzzzzz]

Ψ M is for Maraclea: Chapter Eleven

M is for Maraclea: Following an accident you had over summer break, you find yourself in limbo after being legally dead for several minutes. Now an outcast at boarding school, you end up finding comfort in a strange boy named Nigel. As winter draws near and tragedy strikes, your only reprieve from madness comes from a mind much like your own.

Warnings: None.

To Note: Nigel Colbie x Fem!Reader, NAMED Reader for Plot Reasons, There Are A Lot of DARK Themes.

Word Count: ~2.8k

Previous | Masterlist | Next

You are with Michael in the music room at the boys academy, listening him practice and giving pointers. His fingers glide over the piano keys with a practiced ease. The melody fills the space, wrapping around you like a familiar blanket. You wait until he finishes before approaching.

"Michael, your flow and transitions were smooth," you say, leaning against the piano. "I doubt you need further input from me."

He looks up, a small smile playing on his lips. "Thanks, Mary. Just trying to get ready for the recital next week."

"You'll do great," you assure him. "Your playing always has so much emotion. Technicality isn't the only measure the judges look for."

Michael chuckles, running a hand through his hair. "I appreciate that. I just hope I don't mess up in front of everyone."

Before you can respond, Alex strides into the room, his expression serious. He grabs your arm gently but firmly.

"Mary, I need to talk to you," he says, urgency in his voice.

You glance at Michael, who gives you a curious look before nodding slightly. You let Alex lead you out of the room and down the hall until you're away from prying ears.

"What's going on?" you ask, concern creeping into your voice.

Alex takes a deep breath, looking around as if to make sure no one is listening. "Mr. Colbie shot Mrs. Colbie last night," he says quietly. "Then he shot himself."

The news is bland on your stomach. More death? You try to process it, but something feels off. Nigel never spoke highly of his parents; their relationship was strained at best.

"Why are you telling me this before the gossip starts?" you ask, suspicion lacing your words. "Nigel wouldn’t mourn their deaths."

Alex's eyes flicker with something you can't quite place. "Nigel needs to act like he's upset," he explains, his voice low and urgent. "With the university sponsors visiting, questions will arise if he doesn't show any signs of mourning."

You cross your arms, leaning back against the wall. "Why do you care? I thought you didn't like Nigel."

He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. "We've made our peace. We have something in common now."

Your brows knit together in confusion, nearly snorting. Sure, Alex and Nigel had similar minds, but they had been so brusk with each other you never thought they would see eye to eye. "Something in common? You two were acting like you get along like oil and water. What changed?"

Alex looks at you, his gaze softening. "You," he says simply. "We share similar thoughts in the extent we'll go to protect you."

"You two barely tolerate each other," you manage to say, trying to keep your voice steady. "What could possibly make you work together?"

Alex glances down the hall, then back at you. "We've realized we have to. For your sake."

You want to argue, but the look in his eyes silences you. He's not just being dramatic. There's a weight there, a sincerity that scares you more than anything else. A dark sharpness. You knew the lengths they would go. They already have.

"Very well," you muse quietly. "anything else?"

"Nigel will be expecting you after class," Alex continues, stepping closer. "Just... go along with whatever he needs today. Emotional or otherwise. The Colbie’s deaths are going to bring scrutiny."

You nod slowly, feeling a cold knot form in your stomach. "Okay," you say quietly.

Alex gives you a quick kiss on the crown of your hair. "Take care, Mary," he murmurs. "I'll see you later." You give him a small nod and watch as he turns and walks away, his shoulders tense.

When you return to the music room, Michael is still at the piano, playing a soft, haunting melody. He looks up as you enter.

"Everything okay?" he asks, concern in his eyes.

"Of course," you lie smoothly, a touch of a smile on your lips. "Just... family discussions. Play the last chord for me again."

He nods understandingly and resumes playing, doing as you ask. You sit down next to him on the bench, letting the music wash over you. For a moment, it almost drowns out the chaos in your mind. But not like Nigel does.

Nigel finds you sitting on a bench in the courtyard, his footsteps quiet but sure. You look up from the book in your lap, meeting his eyes. They hold that same intensity you're used to, but today there's a hint of something else. Uncertainty? No, it's too subtle for that.

"They came and went," Nigel says, settling beside you without invitation. "The university representatives."

You close your book, turning slightly to face him. "How did it go?"

He shrugs, but you can tell it's more than just a casual gesture. "They offered me a scholarship to Cambridge," he says, trying to keep his voice even.

Your eyebrows raise slightly in surprise. "Pre-med track?"

"Yes," he confirms, his eyes searching your face for a reaction. "It's what I've always wanted."

You nod slowly, processing the information. "That's incredible," you say softly. "You deserve it."

Nigel's gaze flickers down to your hands, then back up to your eyes. "I'm not sure if I should go."

"Why?" The question slips out before you can stop it.

He shifts slightly on the bench, his fingers drumming against his thigh. "Because of you," he says simply, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

The words hit you like a physical blow. "Me?" you echo, your heart pounding in your chest.

Nigel's eyes lock onto yours, unblinking. "I can't leave you here alone," he explains. "Not with everything that's happened."

You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. "Nigel, I'll be fine," you say, though the words feel hollow even to you. "You can't put your future on hold because of me."

His jaw tightens, and he looks away for a moment before meeting your gaze again. "It's not just about my future," he says quietly. "It's about us."

You take a deep breath, letting the silence stretch between you for a moment. The weight of Nigel's words hangs in the air, and you feel the need to steer the conversation into safer waters.

"So," you say, your voice softer now, "you're still planning on focusing on general surgery?"

Nigel nods, his eyes never leaving yours. "Yes. It's what I've always been drawn to."

You allow a small smile to touch your lips. "You have the steadiness for it," you remark, your gaze dropping to his hands. "And the finger dexterity."

Nigel's eyes darken slightly at your implication, but he doesn't look away. Instead, he shifts closer to you on the bench, his fingers brushing against yours. The memory of his touch lingers in your mind, a sharp contrast to the coldness you often crave.

"You're right," he murmurs, his voice low and intimate. "I've always had a knack for precision."

You feel Nigel’s fingers brush against yours more firmly this time. The area around the pond fades away, leaving just the two of you on that bench. His eyes, dark and intense, hold yours captive.

“You know,” you murmur, trying to keep your voice steady, “we probably shouldn't be out here for too long. Someone might see us.”

Nigel's lips curl into a slight smirk. “Let them,” he says, his voice a soft challenge. "At least they'll know you're mine."

Nigel leans in, his breath warm against your skin. His fingers curl around your waist, pulling you closer. The bench is cold beneath you, but his touch ignites a fire that courses through your veins.

His lips meet yours, firm and insistent. You respond immediately, your hands finding their way to the back of his neck, tangling in his hair. The kiss deepens, and you feel the world around you fade away, leaving just the two of you in this moment.

Nigel's hand slides up your back, pressing you closer to him. Your bodies meld together as his tongue explores your mouth with a hunger that matches your own. The stone bench beneath you is forgotten as you lose yourself in the sensation of his lips, his touch.

You break away for a moment, gasping for air. Nigel's eyes are dark with desire as he looks at you, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

"Mary," he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. "You're all I think about."

You don't respond with words; instead, you pull him back to you, capturing his lips once more. This time, the kiss is even more intense, more desperate. His hands roam your body, exploring every inch of you with a possessive need that sends shivers down your spine.

Your own hands are just as eager, tracing the lines of his muscles through his shirt. You can feel the tension in his body, the barely contained desire that mirrors your own.

Nigel's hand slips under your shirt, the warmth of his touch contrasting sharply with the cool air around you. His fingers trickle across your flesh, brushing along your hip bone before slowly crossing your lower stomach. Yet where his fingers should have roused goosebumps and pleasure, your stomach rolls with nausea.

You pull back, feeling a sudden wave of nausea. You place a hand on his chest, not quite pushing against him but keeping him away from your mouth should your stomach rebel.

Nigel's eyes immediately fill with concern. "Mary, what's wrong?" he asks, his voice gentle but insistent. He cups your face with one hand, searching your eyes for any sign of what might be troubling you.

You force a small smile, though it doesn't reach your eyes. "I think I'm coming down with a cold," you say softly. "I've been feeling fatigued and having headaches lately. So you should probably hold off on kissing me, I don't want you getting sick because of me."

"Never mind the kissing," Nigel mutters while his brows furrow, he brushes a strand of hair away from your face. You don't feel hot. "You should have told me sooner," he says, his tone almost scolding but laced with worry. "We need to get you back to your dorm so you can rest. This cold certainly isn't helping."

"I am perfectly warm, Nigel." you say as you shake your head slightly, not wanting to move just yet. The thought of going back to the dorm feels suffocating. "I'm fine," you insist, though your voice lacks conviction. "I just need a moment."

Nigel doesn't look convinced, but he doesn't push the issue further. Instead, he pulls you closer to him again, wrapping an arm around your shoulders protectively. You lean into his warmth, grateful for the comfort it brings even as the coldness within you persists.

"We should get you some medicine," Nigel says after a moment, his voice firm with determination. "Something to help with the fatigue and headaches. The nurse will surely have something to help you."

You nod slowly, not having the energy to argue. "Okay," you agree quietly.

Nigel stands up and holds out a hand to help you up from the bench. You take it, feeling a bit unsteady on your feet. He keeps a steadying arm around your waist as he guides you back toward the dorms.

As you walk, Nigel continues to fuss over you, asking if you're feeling dizzy or if you need to sit down for a moment. You assure him that you're fine, though in truth, every step feels like an effort. You were feeling more and more fatigued by the second.

Nigel’s arm remains a steady presence around your waist as you both approach your dorm. The cold air nips at your skin, but it’s the exhaustion that weighs you down, making each step feel heavier than the last. You lean into Nigel, drawing from his strength.

When you reach the entrance, he pushes the door open and guides you inside. The warmth of the building envelops you, but it does little to chase away the coldness within.

Just as you’re about to head towards your room, Mrs. Kensington, the dorm manager, appears in the hallway. Her sharp eyes narrow as she takes in your pale complexion and Nigel’s protective grip.

“Mary, what’s going on?” she asks, her tone a mix of concern and authority.

“She’s coming down with something,” Nigel explains before you can respond. “She’s been feeling fatigued and having headaches. I think she should see the nurse.”

Mrs. Kensington steps closer, her gaze softening slightly as she studies your face. “Thank you for bringing her back, Nigel,” she says, her voice gentler now. “I’ll take it from here.”

Nigel looks reluctant to let go of you, his grip tightening for a moment before he releases you into Mrs. Kensington’s care. “Take care of her,” he says quietly, his eyes meeting yours with a mixture of worry and something deeper.

You give him a small nod, too tired to say much else. Mrs. Kensington wraps an arm around your shoulders, guiding you towards the main part of the school where the nurse's office is located.

As you walk away with Mrs. Kensington, you glance back at Nigel one last time. His eyes follow you until you round the corner and disappear from sight. You feel Mrs. Kensington's arm guiding you through the halls. Each step feels like dragging weights, but you keep moving, leaning into her support.

"You're burning up," she murmurs, her voice a mix of concern and annoyance. "Why didn't you come to me sooner?"

You manage a weak smile, though it doesn't reach your eyes. "Didn't want to bother anyone and I like the warmth.”

Mrs. Kensington gives a soft huff, shaking her head. "You need to take better care of yourself, Mary. This isn't just about you anymore."

Her words sting more than you expect, but you nod, too exhausted to argue. The nurse's office comes into view, and the sterile smell hits your nose as soon as the door swings open.

"Nurse Brown," Mrs. Kensington calls out, her voice firm. "We have a sick student here."

Nurse Brown looks up from her desk, her eyes narrowing as she takes in your appearance. She quickly stands and gestures for you to sit on the examination bed.

"What seems to be the problem?" Nurse Brown asks, pulling out a thermometer.

"She's been feeling fatigued and having headaches," Mrs. Kensington explains before you can open your mouth. "Nigel Colbie was kind enough to help her back to the dorms. I think she might be coming down with something."

Nurse Brown nods, placing the thermometer under your tongue. You sit there quietly, feeling the cold metal against your lips. The room is too bright, too sterile, making your head pound even more.

The thermometer beeps, and Nurse Brown frowns as she checks the reading. "You're running a fever," she says, her tone matter-of-fact. "We'll need to get some fluids in you and keep an eye on your temperature."

Mrs. Kensington pats your shoulder gently before stepping back. "I'll check in on you later," she promises before leaving the room.

Nurse Brown helps you lie down on the bed, adjusting the pillow under your head. "Just rest for now," she instructs, her voice soothing. "I'll bring some water and a test kit, we don't want strep running amuck."

You close your eyes, letting the exhaustion wash over you. The cool sheets against your skin are a welcome relief, and for a moment, you feel a semblance of peace.

You lie there, the exhaustion pulling you deeper into the bed. Nurse Brown returns with a small tray, setting it on the table beside you. She hands you a cup of water and you sip it slowly, feeling the cool liquid soothe your dry throat.

“Open wide,” Nurse Brown instructs, holding up the swab for the strep throat test. You comply, opening your mouth as she gently swabs the back of your throat. The sensation makes you gag slightly, but you manage to hold still until she’s done.

“There we go,” she says, placing the swab into a small vial. “This will take a few minutes to process.”

She sits down beside you, pulling out a clipboard with a series of forms. “While we wait, I need to ask you a few questions about your recent health.”

You nod, feeling too tired to speak.

“Have you been experiencing any other symptoms besides fatigue and headaches?” she asks, her pen poised over the paper.

“I have been a little nauseous.”

“Any changes in appetite or sleep patterns?”

You shrug slightly. “I’ve been sleeping more than usual.”

Nurse Brown makes a note on her clipboard. “And when was your last period?”

The question catches you off guard. You mentally calculate the days in your head and realize with a jolt that it’s late. You hesitate before answering, your voice barely above a whisper.

“It’s late.”

Nurse Brown looks up from her clipboard, her eyes narrowing slightly. “How late?”

You swallow hard, feeling a knot form in your stomach. “About two weeks.”

She makes another note on her clipboard, her expression thoughtful. “I do not find that surprising, all the girls’ stress levels have been elevated in recent months given what’s happened. I'm sure it is nothing to worry about."

Date Published: 7/28/24

Last Edit: 7/28/24

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[ashtxeman]

Punch-Out Relationship HC's!

I must clarify.. most of these are PLATONIC relationships! I'll get into the more fun stuff another time.. huhuhuhu. Minor Circuit

Joe and Kaiser are of course together, and have been for a few years now. Alongside this Joe's also great friends with Disco and a nice pal to Hippo when need be (he was previously afraid of Hippo but outgrew that fear).

Kaiser isn't one to make friends but is one to have a boyfriend ironically, who is Joe. He likes Disco and Hippo but only sees them as work friends, rather than personal friends. Hippos growls also tend to startle him, so he's always on edge around him.

Disco is super friendly and considers everybody a great friend, but Hippo is 100% his bestie.

Hippo returns the favour to Disco! He appreciates Disco for everything he does and values their friendship. He also likes Kaiser because he quite likes his moustache but isn't aware that Kaiser actually fears him quite a bit. With Joe, he's more of a work friend who he enjoys playfully mocking from time to time.

Major Circuit:

Hondo is on good terms with everybody, and isn't one to hold a grudge. He'll call everybody a friend at least, and that's true even for Don who he isn't as close to. Alternatively he's besties with Hugger, and even though he is good friends with Tiger he knows he's afraid of him deep down for some reason..

Hugger is like Disco in the sense that he just likes everybody! He thinks of all his fellow circuit members as great friends even if it isn't a mutual opinion.

Tiger is fine with everybody, except Don who he constantly argues with and the rest of the time just manages to tolerate.

Don has a sort of superiority complex over the rest of the circuit which weighs down his opinions on them, but he doesn't actively hate any of them.. he's just annoyed by Tiger 90% of the time and mildly inconvenienced by him the rest.

World Circuit:

Aran is obviously complicated for everyone. You love him, you hate him, or you're about to hate him. But he has opinions too! He tolerates Macho on the rare occasion he isn't loving him being the easiest boxer to tease and play pranks on, on account of his himbo-ness. He quite likes Bull because of how rowdy he can get, and as for Soda they bond quite well due to their shared interest in drinks. As for Sandman, Aran thinks he's too big for his boots but has learnt not to cross the line around him lest he get his ass kicked.

Soda is an overall nice guy who just likes everyone, considering everyone at least a pal to him. Bull is his bestie, and Aran is a close second.

Bull barely tolerates anybody.. except Soda. He finds Macho annoying, he finds Aran aggravating and he's just fine with Sandman, because he's quiet.

Macho is an odd fellow. He acts like he's above everyone else but in reality he often sees himself as an inferior person. When Bull is being Bull, he's terrified, but any other time he's just fine. Soda is good enough to meet his standards, and Aran makes him cry all the time so he's very low on the Macho list of recommendation. As for Sandman.. well, the cupid isn't far away from those two, let's say.

Sandman does his best to be nice to everybody outside of his work facade, but unfortunately some people make that very hard. He likes Macho when he volunteers to help with jobs (which is a weird amount) but finds it hard to attain that when he's.. being Macho. He finds Bull fine, but wishes he'd get his anger sorted, and he thinks Soda is a very nice man who doesn't get enough credit. Like anybody.. He lives his life with Aran in it just fine.

All:

Joe is obviously afraid of Aran, but Aran does go on to treat him better and he gets a little more neutral. As for Aran to Joe, he likes him because he's fun to tease.. but he also likes his cooking.

It's clear at this point, Aran and Hondo are besties.

^ This also goes for Tiger and Aran oddly enough! They have chaotic energy on opposite ends of the scale, and it balances out.

Kaiser and Soda seem to get along nicely, and often have interesting conversations about their histories with each other. There's a nice sense of privacy between them. However, Kaiser is scared of yet another person.. that being Sandman, but he'll hopefully get over that fear. Kaiser is also on good terms with Bull, and is surprisingly good at calming him down.

An odd relationship between Disco and Tiger, as Disco doesn't really talk with Tiger because.. Tiger avoids him. For some reason, Tiger is afraid of Disco Kid. But alternatively, Disco is very buddy buddy with Sandman! Sandy gives Disco boxing tips, Disco gives Sandy dancing tips. 

Hippo quite likes Sandman because he usually brings snacks in for him, but Sandman just does it so Hippo won't pester him. Close to Sandman though, there's Macho, who like a shocking amount of things is scared of Hippo. He has a fear that Hippo might try eat him (Sandman assures him this isn't true obviously). 

Macho and Don really don't like each other. They both accuse the other of being selfish and egotistical (or an eggo which is what Macho says). They're both right. However, Macho does want to get some advice about something from Don.. 

Another with Macho, he and Hugger are the type of people to walk past each other in the street and tilt their hats. 

Aran and Don? Enemies till the end. Don hates Aran for taking his spot in the World Circuit, Aran returns the hatrid because he likes how annoyed it makes Don.

Sandman has a lot! On one hand, he'll gladly stop to talk with Don or Hondo if he goes by them, but on the other hand he's great friends with Hugger over a shared love for animals and great friends with Joe because of the classic big guy, small guy dynamic. However, he dislikes Tiger for a particular decision he made that is also the reason Hondo is always uneasy around him.. Hugger, Hondo and Sandman know about this incident, and specifically keep it away from Disco's ears.

Hugger and Bull.. just call them the bald bros! Hugger is another person who's good with getting Bull calm, mostly with animal talk. Hugger also finds himself interacting with Macho quite often because Macho sees him as a fountain of knowledge, and always has a million questions.

[dekusleftsock]

Did anyone see this? I feel like it’s a small detail in the pile of evidence for Izuku’s “control your heart” thing going on.

Hell, even Bakugou Katsuki Rising is referenced in the same chapter.

(Side note: me and my friend ended up spending 20 minutes identifying that flower, ty @the-real-loverboy for being my favorite flower nerd—regardless it’s called the Paris Japonica, a rare flower native to Japan that has the largest genome to our knowledge. Only problem? I can’t find any symbolism on this flower, and every source is written by white people in the west on how to care for the flower so. If anyone knows literally anything important about this flower, I’m very very interested. I know that it can bloom in the early winter and is more tolerable to colder climates, so maybe it’s a reference to rei/the general himura family? Who knows)

Going back to the original thought, I think the line “I wonder what changes we’ll witness… come tomorrow” has been kind of disregarded. And, as the newest spoilers have shown, the entire todoroki family is undergoing this evolution of the heart ALONGSIDE their own personal quirks.

Now, what does that have to do with bkdk and Izuku specifically? We have ofc, the plot line of Izuku not being able to control his heart for Katsuki, but what makes this situation unique is one for all itself.

Ofa, as I understand it, is a quirk closely related to romance. It’s surrounded all of Izuku’s emotions and close relationships, along with Nana’s signature line describing ofa as romantic. And, if we’re talking about near death experiences making these hidden parts of their quirks pop out unintentionally, then that would explain why Katsuki has a connection to ofa. From the ofa stars DURING Bakugou Katsuki Rising, to being able to meet and then talk to the Allmight vestige.

So, uncontrolled emotions, rejection of vulnerability, creates an intimate connection to anyone that Izuku the character, cares about.

On top of all of this, all of Izuku’s inner quirk stuff is so closely tied to his heart, that he doesn’t even need to be in life or death situations—it just has to feel like it. Anger so palpable, he literally unlocks blackwhip. Fear of his friends and fellow heroes demise so strong he unlocks float. And the list goes on and on, with him unlocking most of his quirks during his lowest low, his depressive episode.

Izuku doesn’t have to be dying like Touya does to lose control, he just has to vaguely feel like it.

And of the characters I feel have not evolved their hearts as much as their quirks, Katsuki and Izuku I feel will be the most passionate.

But I digress, here’s the people I believe will have this inner life or death quirk “awakening” because of their hearts: Toga, Ochako, Deku, Katsuki, Shigaraki, and the entire Todoroki family.

Now, controlling your heart and near death experiences, lets see—why are these two ideas so closely tied to each other? What makes them inherently unique in comparison to each other?

Or rather, a better question, what connects them?

I’d argue it’s acceptance. Pain could be another argument sure, but I feel like it’s way more common to just accept that your dying when you’re almost dead, than to actually register the pain from it.

And acceptance of the heart often comes hand in hand with those experiences—Endeavor knows he will die with Touya and he has accepted the fact that he was never enough for him as a father, but that if he can bring him to the sky, it will be okay because he can die with his son as penitence for his wrongdoings, while keeping the rest of his family okay. Probably better off without him because of his actions.

And Katsuki, during his death, has accepted his fate. But while doing so, he has also accepted that he won’t catch up to Izuku, that he truly has been a dorky fan of Allmight, that he can die loving him. (Love doesn’t have to mean romantic in this example, like yes I do believe they will be canon, but love is a loose term here because of what his death truly meant) Because that death meant accepting his care and his admiration of Izuku, that he’s always been looking behind him.

And this circles back to Izuku, with parallels between Rei chasing Endeavor into the fire paralleling Izuku chasing Katsuki into fire during the sludge villain fight, because endeavors death is—while poetic—ultimately only harmful. Yes he is saving the city and Japan, he is dying as a hero and protecting his family, but as Shoto said, they have to do it together. This isn’t Endeavor healing his heart, I would argue it’s meaningless sacrifice born out of guilt. Rei SHOULD help, Natsuo SHOULD help, Fuyumi SHOULD HELP! Shoto shouldn’t have tried to fight dabi on his own, because Enji and Shoto both feel entirely responsible for what Touya has become, when they aren’t!

People forget that Touya is a fucking adult. He’s a serial killer and an arsonist because he chose to be. That doesn’t mean he’s forever going to be the worst person in the world, but no one person is responsible for his actions other than him. And that’s a reality we have to accept with our trauma, our parents can exponentially fuck up and make us terrible people, but you as a person have every opportunity as an adult to change what they have made you become. Touya could have gotten a job if he was that mad at his dad, he could have just fucking knocked on the front door of his house, he could have chosen at ANY POINT in his life to say, “No, I shouldn’t do that.” But he simply didn’t.

And not Endeavor, not Rei, not Natsuo, not Fuyumi, and certainly not Shoto are responsible for that. Dabi is selfish. I love his character but that’s a fact. He is selfish because of his trauma yes, this is all born out of an innate childhood need for his fathers attention yes, but that doesn’t make it justified.

“But Sock what about what you said earlier about saving him together!” I still stand by both my points.

Dabi can both need to be saved AND can also be selfish for needing to be saved in the first place. Those aren’t opposite ideas, they can still coexist. And they can coexist because Dabi is a character written well! He’s not a “villain with the right ideas taken too far”, he’s a complex person with an interesting backstory who has still killed people. (Fun fact dabi has committed several war crimes under the Geneva Convention LMAO)

MHA describes heroics as oftentimes “sticking your nose in places where they don’t belong”, meaning even people who don’t necessarily want to be saved. Dabi can still be selfish and wrong while still needing to be saved and supported.

There’s this line in a fanfic I read, something about human beings sometimes not having enough time in their life to become a better person. For person A, maybe it takes a couple months and a few simple ideas. For person B, maybe it takes your whole life and then some to understand the weight of your own actions. And that doesn’t make person A or person B incapable of change, they can still just need a proper opportunity to understand, or practice to implement a new idea into their mind.

Maybe person B just needed better luck, maybe person A was just a teenager growing up, but they both can still change.

Tangent over about the Todoroki family, back to Izuku. Like Endeavor in this instance, Izuku is often the type to have this martyr mentality, but unlike Izuku, Endeavor is the one currently in the fire, or more rather, he is the one currently dying. Like Katsuki.

Katsuki has accepted his death in this war, that ship has sailed. He has come close to death and then actually died, and the todoroki’s are currently going through the process. So that leaves Izuku. (And technically Toga too, maybe ochako, but that’s for another meta one day maybe)

Will Izuku have to come close to death? I’m excited to see.

Idrk how to end this meta, I think I had other thoughts and ideas I wanted to share, (along with a better conclusion), but I forgot those ideas and stuff about half way through writing this.

[dragonsdendoodles]

Could u draw or do some headcanons for jillard (millard x Jacob) if it's not to much to ask pls!

UNDERRATED SHIP RIGHT THERE ABSOLUTELY YES

I like to think if Jillard were ever canon it probably would’ve been from Hollow City to AMOD (because honestly I’m still surprised Jemma lasted that long to begin with). This is between Emma and Noor

I don’t think Millard was Jacob’s bi awakening (personally I like to think Ricky was) but he was the first time Jacob felt like a relationship with a guy could really go anywhere, despite them eventually figuring out they were better as friends

Or with the Peculiar Polycule™️ they can still stay a thing. That’s also an option

They bonded over cartography. Jacob made maps with Abe as a kid and it’s literally Millard’s whole thing. If it wasn’t before this, the moment where Millard had the really big Map of Days and was very excitedly showing it to the other kids was the official “that’s it. I’m in love” for both of them

They seem to have this thing where they don’t really need to say anything to know what the other means or feels. Kinda like how Hugh and Fiona are but like not strengthened by being together for 200 years if that makes sense

They’re just kinda chill. They’ve got this really slow, chill thing going with their relationship. They nerd out about books and maps, and you’ll usually find them cuddling somewhere reading.

I think they see their relationship as more Best Friends Plus than anything else, which is why I don’t think there would be a big fallout if Jacob does fall for Noor and they separate. It doesn’t have to be this big thing, if they don’t wanna date anymore, that doesn’t change a whole lot for them

On a similar vein, I think if they did get together canonically Jacob would probably want a little bit more from their relationship and Millard just wouldn’t really get it? Mill gives him all the love in the world but his version of “all my love” is very low-key for the most part. Very casual, almost too much so, Jacob likes excitement (as shown by the fact that both of his canon girlfriends are combustible)

If they ever were to argue I think it would’ve been about Fiona. It’s not a secret that Millard was really insensitive about it (which is why I don’t have much hope for Fughllard ever working in canon) and while I don’t think it was necessarily Millard’s fault, I don’t think Jacob would tolerate it. Not being able to read the room is one thing, being a dick for no reason is a whole other one.

All that being said I think they would have (arguably) the most healthy relationship Jacob could really be in, all things considered. They’re chill, they’re low-key, very soft. I will always take anything good with Jillard. 🤍🩵

[squiddcakes]

Hello! A lot of you had positive responses to my last post, so here I’ll be writing my personal rewrites of the I.M.P. Crew (Sorry this took so long, I got side-tracked this weekend <:]). For a reminder of what my redesigns looked like, you can find them Here. I’m gonna go from left to right and start with the first crew member:

Mildred (or Millie)

I did a lot of reworking around Mildred since a majority of her characterization is basically nonexistent, so I gave her a personality with a lot of potential and complexity that’s on par with her male crew members.

Mildred comes from a very low-income, Southern family in the Wrath Ring. She grew up on a barn with her parents and several other siblings, making her essentially a middle child. She worked on their farm for most of her life as a hand and delivery girl to send fresh produce to buyers and the local market. It was like this for some time until the family business had gone dry due to some messy ties with the upper-class that resulted in them going into poverty. Wanting to help her family and support them financially Mildred left to go find work elsewhere, in which she meets Blitzo and is hired onto the I.M.P. team.

She’s very hard-working, a bit brutish but has a heart of gold, and is blunt and out-spoken. She’s not very sophisticated but has a lot of Wisdom to her and gives some great advice to Loona as the only other woman in the workplace, and someone for Loona to look up to in times of need. She gets along great with everyone except Moxxie, who she butts heads with constantly due to their conflicting personalities and backgrounds. Speaking of Moxxie, he’s next on the list.

Moxandicus (Moxxie)

Moxxie was an Imp born into the wealthier part of Imp society, basically making him the equivalent of your typical “uptight, sophisticated rich boy”. His family comes from a line of competitive businessmen, none of that mafia mumbo-jumbo, though they probably do have some loose ties to them in some way. Moxxie is the odd-one-out of his family, rather than taking an interest in the family business, instead finds his passion in Mortals History (this man is so infatuated with Humans culture its crazy). Because of this, his family looked at him more as a nuisance “wasting his time on silly hobbies”, and basically cut him off from his wealth until he “proved himself worthy” of being welcomed back into the family. Now broke and nowhere to go, Moxxie finds himself looking for work, where he meets Blitzo and joins I.M.P.

I imagine my Moxxie has a very similar personality to the one if the show, except he’s more educated, calculating, snooty and uptight, and less of.. I don’t know how to put this— coward? Butt of the joke? You get what I mean. He’s essentially the straight man and voice of reason for the group, and is the one who usually has to get them out of their pickles when working. He doesn’t have a lot of street smarts and is less willing to get his hands dirty compared to everyone else. Like I said earlier he clashes a lot with Millie and frequently questions Blitzo’s authority, but most of the time doesn’t argue back on the count of that’s his boss. He’s indifferent towards Loona, though questions why a teenager is working for them in the first place.

Blitz(o)

A lot of Blitz’s backstory and personality is mostly the same: Grew up in the circus in the Pride Ring, left after wanting to seek more in life prove to everyone someone from his social class can make it big in the world, yadayadayada. However I did rewrite some things that I believed wold make his character a lot better/more tolerable:

He’s still on good terms with his sister, they’re just really busy all the time so they don’t have a lot of time to talk or see each other (I’m so sick of this dude not having at LEAST one good relationship).

He and Verosika are still on bad terms due to their messy break-up, though I want to believe Blitzo regrets and sometimes even misses her and the actions that led to their falling out, though due to his pride refuses to admit it out loud.

None of that weird “sexually harassing my coworkers” shit. That was weird and gross.

I gave him a personality that’s more attuned to “if Weird Al was a bounty hunter who grew up in the circus”. He was always some silly little guy to me. The man grew up in a circus, I’d expect him to be a little clowned down if you get what I’m sayin’.

His relationship with Loona is typically the same. He adopted her when she was around 13-14 and has been raising her ever since as his teenage daughter (None of that weird “treating hellhounds like literal peta thing that was weird and confusing). He makes her work as their secretary and “social media manager” as a way to earn a weekly allowance and also “the kids are hip with it she’ll do wonders for us promotionally”. She does not, he just refuses to admit it.

Leona (Loona)

I’ve done a lot of reworking for Loona as well, same reasons as Millie. Istg they do not know how to wrote female characters.

Loona is a hellhound born from the Sloth Ring. She doesn’t know a lot of her background, but was raised in foster care for a small portion of her life until Blitzo took her in when she hit her teenage years. Before that however she took a liking towards astrology and magic and would constantly read about it in her formative years. When she began living with Blitz she began attending schooling to further learn about magic and how to translate older works, which is how she’s able to use Stolas’ book for the IMP team to use. She get’s teased on a lot in school for being one of the only Hellhounds there, which causes her to feel insecure about herself and shut in from people including Blitz.

Loona’s a very quiet, closed-off teenager (16-17), who’s very much in that “going through a phase” part of growing up. She’s very insecure about herself and is easily-impressionable, which is why she looks up to Millie so much, since she’s cool and is the only other girl in the office space to talk to. Loona’s relationship with Blitz is the same, except she actually acts like a teenager and not an abusive asshole. She wants to prove to herself that she’s not some “loser nobody” and can actually do magic and make friends with other teens her age.

And that’s it. Sorry it was so long I had a lot to say lol. If you have further questions, direct them to my ask box.

[ashyswoyaus]

I'm curious about the role the hat plays in your Lord Wander Au. I have questions like "how dies it feel about wander doing evil?" "How does lord wander treat the hat compared to his Canon self?", specifics about how it works, etc. You mentioned in a past post that you have a lot of thoughts about the hat. So when you feel like sharing them, I'm all ears.

sorry for taking a bit to get to this!!! school has been rough

my thoughts about the hat are something i've really wanted to get into!! i think how i view the backstory between wander and the hat is relevant enough here (since that's what my 'lots of thoughts' in that post were mainly referring to) so to summarize, without going into too much detail that'd turn it into a whole fic: before meeting the hat, wander was very cowardly and always running away from problems, with the hat being kind of the first time he'd ever done something so big for someone. and helping the hat taught him many things, like the value of helping people and receiving help in return, etc, one of the most important being to roll with the punches, to improvise. it's why he can be so carefree now—it Has saved his life before when he needed it (inflating while he falls in the breakfast), and everything he needs is in there. it's his comfort item!

and its characterization—it serves as basically the same character as wander, something that loves to help others, even if that help might not always be obviously what someone thinks they need at first. you could even argue the fear aspect—it's confident and happy around wander, but its pain tolerance is Low, and put under a little stress it does what whatever you want to try and Avoid more pain, then when it gets Super distressed it completely panics and blows up. because as an object it's completely helpless to do anything else (haha! the word!)

which, getting back to your questions, is really interesting to think about in this context! because, yeah, i do think it would have Feelings regarding wander doing evil, considering it is stated to like helping people, and clearly has Opinions when it comes to people being jerks. i don't think it particularly likes when wander hurts people, no! but then, why does it still help him? does it still help him? even as a villain, i don't see wander as the type to use violence on the hat to get it to give him what he wants. actually, i think their backstory would happen pretty much the same way. wander still saved the hat, and earned its trust over time, while the hat helped wander get around and become less anxious. wander doing Bad Things would happen some time after that.

so i think the hat probably feels indebted to him—he already earned its trust and proved he would keep it safe, he treats it kinder than others before him—and it's not like it could up and leave him, if it wanted. it might give him a bit more snark, maybe, try to convince him out of things. but wander disregards it and continues anyway. there might also be a little Fear there. even if it's one of the few things wander Wouldn't try hurting, what if he did? if wander wants it to Be a certain way, it will have to be, because who knows what might happen to it if it wasn't? which leads to it helping wander with some of the Bad Stuff. it is also swapped with the dombots, after all. i think it also reflects nicely with how lord wander treats his other 'friendships'. he is Stubborn and has ideas on How Things Should Be. he Knows What's Best. i won't get too into That here, there's another ask in my inbox that's related to that, but that's the basic gist of his relationships here and the hat is the one that reflects that—instead of being a mirror of wander's personality, it's a mirror of how he wants other people to be. like how the dombots were completely obedient to her, the way dominator thought friends should be: wander's hat may banter with him, act as a little friend where both of them have helped each other, but it must always in the end be what wander thinks it is, what wander thinks he wants.

since the last post, i've become more endeared to the idea of wander Actually losing the hat at the end of its swapped the bot episode (or at least at Some Point, with that episode being the Beginning of a hat arc. maybe he would lose it in the equivalent my fair hatey?) after spending time with dee. it may not be what wander wants. it may not be what even the hat wants. but it's what they both need.

[catt-nuevenor]

Same person who sent the initial bg3 ask here! I absolutely love your analysis of Shadowheart! I agree with you about her big act 3 choice (trying to be vague just incase others don't want spoilers). I was surprised that the majority of online opinions I've seen argue that the other choice is the better ending for Shadowheart. I just want her to be free and happy—even if the journey to happiness is rocky lol.

"It's the same bg3 person again b/c I also love gushing about this game and I ran out of room lol. As far as starting a Dark Urge run, I 100% have to recommend romancing Astarion. Though, it's 100X better on a run where you decide to be good and resist the urge. It's actually surprisingly wholesome and low-key so much better than romancing him as a normal Tav. He's surprisingly supportive and there's so many great moments where you talk about resisting and becoming better people together."

---

Glad you enjoyed my responding gushing and rambles. I do think the framing of the last scene with Shadowheart's questline perpetuates a lot of the opinions on her parents alive being the better option. I suppose it's neater too, since the game ends a relatively short time afterwards and unlike BG2 we don't get long epilogue cards describing what happens in the long term. No chance to see the full consequences of what being the unfortunate plaything of a vindictive goddess does to a person.

"I felt the wound last night, while you were sleeping. Like some sadistic child, de-winging a fly."

A lifetime with that isn't one I'd wish on anyone.

Onto the Dark Urge playthrough. Astarion and I have a hate/tolerate relationship. If I could lean wholly into the darker options (to get Astarion to the point of liking the Main Character enough), or a straight romance, I'm sure it would prove very entertaining, especially from what I know of the events and 'incidents' involving the Dark Urge. As it is, I was planning on romancing Lae'zel.

I'll popcorn my way through Astarion's excellent personality and romance through the medium of Youtube in the end, I suspect. Tens of hours, even with a quick playthrough of BG3 (I've never been good at speedrunning games), is a long time for me to 'play straight' or otherwise cuddle up to a chap if I had someone other than a female main character.

I will forever adore Astarion's response to Araj (the drow potion lady) in the city:

Araj: "Ah, and the heart-stopping bloodsucker. I hope you've changed your mind. My neck is yours, any time."

Astarion: "And I will keep refusing until the end of 🎵time🎵!"

But we make snarky allies at best.

The end of his questline makes me overall begrudgingly fond of him. Like a great fluffy Persian cat that you just know is going to take the utmost pleasure in biting you, but you still let snuggle up to you regardless.