#i have a really high fever maybe now is not the best time however! it might also be the perfect time

[bromcommie]

they’re gonna send me to “rewatching dark for the bazillionth time” jail. and also the horny one

[just-a-girl-who-wrytes]

Omg I just accidently found your blog and I'm so freaking happy, cause there are not enough writer who writes for Deacon 😭 unfortunately I'm super obsessed with him, with an unhealthy amount of fic ideas in my brain xD so I give it a try and send you one of those, hopefully jot annoying you with this (or with my shitty English, it's not my first language, so I'm sorry).

Well buckle up for my request:

Reader is a new Swat member and instantly everybody loves her, with her bubbly friendly self. She's bonding great with her teammates and especially her and Deacon grow super close (they develop feelings for each other but don't want to tell the each other afraid to ruin their friendship, so their feelings stay hidden). When one day a case goes sideways and it leaves her injured (maybe a concussion or something like that) Deacon blames himself for her injury and the next days he distances himself from her, cause he thinks that it is unhealthy for him to have such deep feelings for her and him constantly worrying for her wellbeing. She notices his change of behavior and she's super sad. He starts to being unfriendly to her and being a little bit of an ass?! Even alerting the other members with his behavior. The whole situation is taking a toll on her and she is starting to effecting not only her poor heart but also her health. (so maybe she falls sick, but keep it from her teammates especially Deacon, cause she thinks that after her injury during a case he thinks of her as not capable or something like that). That is until one day she doesn't show up to work which very uncommon for her, cause she's always on time and the first one at the station. They're all worrried and Hondo tells Deacon that he has to drive to her apartment. Well he tries to refuse and send Stress but Hondo insists, so Deacon drives to her apartment. He finds her suffering from a very high fever..... So maybe with a happy ending like Deacon regrets his shitty behavior, she instantly cries when she recognizes him in her feverish state, asking him why he hates her suddenly, which is now breaking his heart. He cares for her and nurses her back to health, or at first tries to bring her fever down. Later he confesses why he was an asshole.

Soooorry it's so long. There's so pressure for you to write this. Maybe you just want to use some ideas? Well I would be so happy.

Please take care lovely

Here you go, hope you enjoy!

“Nice!” Luca exclaimed as the team watched you send rounds down range from your firearm.

With the increase in officer related shootings, LAPD had decided to provide each team a SWAT medic and you were the newest member of 20 squad. 

“Who knew girls can shoot?” You heard Deacon asked. You turned to playfully scowl at him and noticed him wink at you. 

“Better watch it, Kay, or I’ll show you just how good I really am.” 

You had been a part of the team for just over two months and they were the best guys you had ever worked with in your career. You truly became a part of their family – you had their backs and they had yours. There was one that was different though. 

David Kay. 

You had noticed him watching you on more than one occasion, stealing winks from you, sharing small, flirtatious smiles. You weren’t sure if your attraction to him was mutual or not, but if you had to guess, you would say yes. However, you didn’t want to complicate anything by dating one of your teammates and you didn’t want to ruin the friendship you had developed with Deacon. You assumed Deacon adopted the same mindset because he never brought it up either. 

However, that didn’t mean your flirting with each other fell on blind eyes. 

The entire team noticed it and often gave you both shit over it. 

You both were in the middle of denying another teasing round of friends with benefits accusations from your teammates when you were dispatched to a school shooting. 

The mood immediately sobered up as all of you put on your gear and grabbed your bags and firearms. The ride to the school in Black Betty was quiet minus updates from Hondo. 

“Stay liquid, guys,” He told the team as you pulled up on scene. 

There were multiple reports of injured children inside of the school. 

This call was all yours. 

It was going to be your job to go inside and assess each injured child to see how critically injured they were. It was your team’s job to protect you while you did that. You were going in without any knowledge of where the shooter was, but you knew if you had children, you would want someone to go in and save your baby. You swallowed your fear and prepared to do your job. 

You got out of the armored truck and took your spot in the middle of your team. You slowed your breathing down to get your heart rate under control and keep your emotions in check. 

Deacon made sure that he stayed close to you as you entered the school. He knew his teammates would have your back too, but he felt… differently about you. He cared about you a lot. He had quickly fallen for your smile and your personality. You didn’t let the team’s banter intimidate you one bit from the start. You were quick and witty with your playfulness with them. You were smart as hell when it came to medicine and you had proven to be a solid member of the SWAT team in training exercises and on calls you had run together. He wanted so badly to ask you out to dinner, but he wasn’t willing to change the dynamic of the team by adding a relationship to the mix. However, that didn’t mean he couldn’t be protective over you – whether you noticed it or not. 

That was why Deacon had taken it so personally when you were knelt down, applying a tourniquet to a fourth-grade student’s leg and got shot by the hidden gunman. His team covered him while he immediately turned to you to make sure you were okay. The round had struck your vest, but you knew it had broken ribs. The pain you felt in your side was unmistakable. Regardless, you threw your body over the child’s to protect her from the gunfire that ensued. Deacon and Luca dragged you both behind a desk behind a wall in a classroom. 

“Are you okay?” Deacon asked without taking his aim from the door way. 

“We’ve got to get her out of here.” You ignored his question as you continued to try and stop the little girl’s bleeding. 

Your voice was forced and you were breathy. 

“I asked if you were okay,” Deacon said angrily. 

“I’m fine.” You retorted. 

You soon heard Tan’s voice over the radio that the shooter had been neutralized. You didn’t know if there was more than one shooter, but didn’t see any signs of one so far. When you got the clear from Hondo, you radioed for another team to come in and get the girl out and get her to a hospital. Once she was safely removed, you resumed your formation in the middle of the team to continue to clear the school building. Deacon could tell you were injured because you didn’t shoulder your firearm correctly, but he didn’t see any blood so he let it go. He was pissed off at you for not stopping and going to get help yourself, but he was even more pissed off at himself for not seeing the gunman before he shot at you. 

It took two hours to clear the rest of the school and stabilize the remaining children. By the time you were done, you were visibly diaphoretic and short of breath. You could hardly manage three words without stopping to catch your breath. 

“20-David to command,” Deacon radioed, “We need an EMS unit to our location, we have a team member who needs to be checked out.” 

You were in pain, you couldn’t breathe, and you were pissed off that Deacon asked for EMS without consulting you first. 

“Why did you do that?!” You managed to asked through clenched teeth. “These children need those paramedics.” You took a few shallow breaths, “Not me! Cancel. Them.” 

If looks could kill, your sergeant would be the one who needed a medic unit, not you.

“Officer,” Deacon said sternly, “You look like hell and you cannot breathe.”

You started to open your mouth to cut him off, but he started speaking loudly again.

“Now, I suggest you shut up and listen to your sergeant. I am not the one who takes orders from you.” 

His harsh words hit you harder than the bullet hit your ballistic vest and left you just as speechless. David had never been so disrespectful to you. If the paramedics hadn’t arrived to assess you, you would have turned in your badge right there. You knew the rest of the team had noticed as well because they were all silent which pissed you off even more. Where was your support?

The paramedics tried helping you onto the stretcher, but you refused it. Despite not being able to speak for being short of breath. You held onto the stretcher for support and walked to the ambulance. By the time you finally made it outside to the ambulance, you were physically unable to get into the ambulance because you were hurting so bad and so short of breath. The EMS providers finally convinced you to get onto the stretcher and they were able to load you into the truck. 

When you arrived to the ER, you were taken to a trauma room due to the fact that you had technically been shot. Your chest x-ray revealed a collapsed lung due to the broken ribs. 

The rest of the team finished debriefing before being cleared to leave for the day. Hondo met Deacon in the quiet locker rooms since most of everyone else had already left. 

“Deac…” Hondo paused, knowing he needed to tread carefully, “What was up back at the school? I have never heard you speak to anyone like that – especially one of our teammates.” 

Deacon slammed his locker shut. 

“Hondo, now ain’t the time, brother.”

The lieutenant raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, I won’t press, but I do ask that you consider an apology. It was unwarranted today. We all performed immaculately given the circumstances.”

“No, Hondo. No. We did not all perform immaculately.” His tone was biting. 

Deacon walked passed Hondo and left the locker rooms. He left the station and threw his duffel bag in the backseat of his truck. He climbed in, started it, and drove to a nearby lake that off the road and would likely be deserted after dark on a week night. He parked in the dark and slammed his fists against the steering wheel in frustration. 

Tears filled his eyes as he mentally kicked himself in the ass for missing the shooter that injured you today. He didn’t fight the tears as they spilled down his cheeks. What had gotten into him? Why were you different? Why was he so upset? Why did you getting injured bother him so badly? You were okay and you were expected to make a full recovery according to Hicks. Where along the line had he developed feelings and why was he so afraid of talking to you about them?

You spent 6 days in the hospital, 4 of those with a chest tube before being discharged home. During your entire hospital stay, Deacon had not been by to see you once despite daily visits from the rest of your teammates. It made you mad, but most of all, it hurt your feelings. You really liked you sergeant – or you thought that you did. His actions since you had been injured spoke louder than any words that could have been said. 

Luca and Chris were there to take you home and help you get settled. They carried your bags in and Chris helped you unpack your things while Luca cooked supper for the three of you. Chris helped you remove your bra so you could put on a loose, comfy t-shirt. Being the only females on the squad left you two comfortable around each other. 

“That is one hell of a bruise, babe.” She said as she looked at your black and purple side. 

You had to agree – the entire left side of your torso was bruised. It looked awful. Thankfully, the doctors had been able to help manage your pain with narcotics. 

“I’m glad it finally looks worse than it feels… Which is saying a lot because it still hurts like hell.” 

You slipped on a pair of sleep shorts and made your way back into your kitchen with Chris. 

You took a pain pill and joined your teammates in your living room to eat the spaghetti that Luca made. 

“Thank you so much for taking care of me guys,” You said several hours later as you walked Luca and Chris to your door. 

“That’s what we’re here for, love,” Luca said, pulling you into a gentle hug. 

You kissed his cheek, “Supper was delicious, Dom. Thank you times a million.” 

He returned the kiss to your cheek and Chris pulled you in for a hug. 

“Call us if you need anything?” 

You smiled at her after the hug, “You know I will.” 

You settled onto your couch with a glass of wine. You knew the alcohol and narcotic wasn’t the smartest elixir, however, you needed to mask more than your physical pain. 

You couldn’t get Deacon off your mind and your heart had yet to stop hurting. Your emotional pain screamed much louder than your physical pain. 

“Dammit!” You heard through clouded consciousness. “What the fuck?” 

You felt yourself being picked up and carried to your bed. You recognized a familiar cologne but quickly disregarded the scent and winced at the pain in your ribs before drifting back off to sleep. 

You woke up the next morning nearly in tears again as you entered a coughing spell. You managed to get out of bed and make your way to the kitchen where your pain pills were, but you were scared shitless by a man sitting at your kitchen table. As soon as your heart began racing with fear, the fear subsided, realizing that it was Deacon sitting inside of your home. 

“Jesus Christ! What the fuck, David?” You held your chest with one hand and braced your broken ribs with the other. 

He didn’t answer you. 

You ignored his silence and took your morning pain medication. 

“Ya know… I said the same thing last night when I came over and found you unconscious on your couch. So, I can also say, what the fuck? What were you thinking?” Deacon’s voice grew steadily louder as he stood up and turned to you. “Pain pills and alcohol?”

You were angry. “Something to make this shit stop hurting,” You spat as you snatched up the side of your shirt to reveal your black and blue torso. 

You could tell the extent of your injuries caught Deacon off guard. His facial expression softened and he didn’t respond. 

You let go of your shirt, letting it fall back down to your waist and continued fixing yourself a glass of water to take your pain pill with. You took your medicine and continued to ignore your sergeant as you turned your back to him to get the milk out of your refrigerator to fix yourself a bowl of cereal. His hand stopped yours mid-air reaching for your cabinet. He gently held your wrist with one hand and you felt the edge of your shirt being lifted again. He let go of your hand, staring at the bruising that covered you. You could sense his demeanor soften. 

There was a long silence as he took in your injuries. 

“I’m so sorry…” He whispered. 

The tone in his voice felt like a hug to your soul. 

“Deacon-” You turned around to face him. 

“No, listen to me,” he interrupted you. “This…” He grazed his fingertip down your side, “is all my fault.”

The confusion was written all over your face. 

“I should have seen that bastard before he ever had a chance at you.” 

You began shaking your head but you weren’t quite sure what to say. 

“You’ve been an asshole to me ever since it happened, David, what the hell has changed now?” You were beginning to grow angry again. 

“Look, I am so, so sorry.” His voice was gentle. “I should have stopped that guy before he shot you. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like I did. I should have visited you in the hospital. You are a teammate and I failed you, but I really should have told you from the get-go that I have developed feelings for you.” He didn’t take a breath the entire time he spoke so you struggled to follow him, but his last sentence hit you like a ton of bricks. 

“Excuse me?” 

“Ever since you have been on the team with us, you have become more than just a teammate to me. Truthfully, I have liked you from the day that I met you and my attraction to you has only grown every single day. I like you so much more than just as a teammate. I would dare say that I am falling in love with you.” He slowly reached up to cradle your face with his hand, hesitant, wondering if you would allow him to touch you. 

You did. 

“I am so, so sorry that I have treated you so poorly this week – so wrong. It had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that I hate myself for not being able to protect you like I should have. I’ve been so afraid to let you know how I feel about you. I’m sorry I was more afraid of affecting the team than I was giving you the honesty that you deserve. Please, please forgive me.” 

He looked into your eyes as he nervously chewed on his bottom lip. 

“Deacon…” You said quietly, leaning into his hand caressing your jaw. 

He took a deep breath and continued, “If you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I came over here last night to apologize and tell you all of this. When I found you passed out on the couch, barely responsive, it frustrated me. So, I stayed here last night to make sure you were okay. Please don’t be mad.” 

Silence fell between you while you considered how to respond. Given the emotions that you had worked through over the past week, going from feelings for your partner, to physical and emotional hurt, to anger towards David for not visiting, texting or calling, resentment towards yourself for having feelings towards David despite how cruel he had been to you with his absence while you had been hospitalized, you struggled to find any words.

Deacon watched you suffer through a week’s worth of feelings as he watched your eyes. You took a deep breath. 

He decided that you were taken too long to respond and if he didn’t act now, he never would. 

He leaned down and softly pressed his lips on yours. 

You instinctively closed your eyes and allowed David to kiss you. When you didn’t pull away, he parted his lips just enough to run his tongue tenderly along your bottom lip. You opened your lips, allowing him to kiss you deeper. You began to return the kiss when David went to place his hands on your waist, forgetting about your injuries. You stopped kissing him and winced. 

“God, I’m so sorry,” he said.

“It’s okay.” You whispered, your voice shaky. 

Deacon noticed the tears that trickled down your cheeks. 

He wiped them away with his thumbs and began apologizing to you again. 

You interrupted him with another kiss. You reached up and intertwined your fingers behind his head, softly rubbing his neck with your fingertips. He moaned quietly into the kiss. He grabbed your arm and squeezed it, needing to touch you, but being mindful of your injuries. You enjoyed the feeling of his tall, muscular body, towering over yours. You felt protected. 

“Deacon?” 

He pressed his forehead to yours, brushing a stand of hair behind your ear, “Mmhmm?”

“I love you.” 

"I love you too."

[papayatori]

Oneshot! Fushiguro Megumi

Fluff 💓

This is just something to keep me occupied, nothing cannon, just happy fluff

Sniff

I lay in bed, genuinely upset with myself for feeling like a slob. I hated being sick, I hated feeling helpless. I haven’t done anything within my normal routine for three days now, and my roommate, Nobara was being distant with me because of that. It wasn’t that she didn’t care for me, in fact, she sent me sweet texts every now and then to make sure I was okay, she just didn’t want to get sick.

Megumi had done his best to keep me well, I knew he also didn’t like me being sick, but there wasn’t anything we could really do about it. He tried to talk me into seeing a doctor, but I have a fear of them, and Shoko was busy with Yuji after their last mission. Or maybe that was just an excuse so I didn’t feel like I was bothering anyone.

As a result, however, Megumi had been taking care of me. He was upset that I didn’t contact him for help to begin with, but being stubborn was sadly one of my less favorable traits.

“I brought you some soup.” He stated plainly. While his voice portrayed no emotion, his eyes said it all. They were frantic with worry, laced with care. I smiled at him.

“You didn’t have to do that, gumi.” I said, opening my arms out to hold the bowl he was carrying.

“Yes I did, you won’t ask for anything.” He said, handing me the warm bowl. I hurriedly started eating it. His eyes widened with shock.

“Slow down! You’re going to burn yourself. When was the last time you ate anything?” I gave him a sheepish grin, he knew the answer to that. He rolled his eyes. “Y/n, have you seriously not eaten anything in the last couple of days?” I didn’t respond, I only continued to scarf down the soup, which was surprisingly good. He scoffed.

“I’ve got my work cut out for me with you, don’t I?” He said, feeling my forehead gently. His cool hands felt like ice compared to my burning skin. I winced.

“Your hands are freezing.”

“No, you just have a really high fever. I’m going to call Shoko.” I shook my head frantically. He paused, waiting for my excuses.

“I’m fine, I promise! There’s no need-“

“I know you don’t want to be a bother to anyone, love, but you may need medical attention. I’m not going to sit back and watch you mope around for the next few days. You aren’t even taking good care of yourself.”

Reluctantly, I let him fish his phone from his jacket pocket and dial Shoko. I knew he was going to do it whether I agreed or not.

He kissed my forehead lightly before crouching down beside my bed, grabbing my hand gently.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t let anything happen to you again. I care too much for you, regardless of how I show it.” I smiled at him, grateful to have such a caring boyfriend.

[thehyperfixationspeedrunner]

This is me trying

On ao3 too

Summary: It's been a month since what Cardan has been calling the "reptile accident" when he decides to get up before Jude, not knowing the consequences.

OR these two are traumatised and they may not acknowledge it, but I will.

Trigger warnings (already put in the tags but I'm not sure if I did it right so better safe than sorry): panic attack, cussing

It's weird how easily you fall into routine. It's barely been a month since what Cardan has started calling the "reptile accident" or the one he likes best "revealing his true form" (although that one isn't used in front of Jude, she's not sure why but she prefers it that way). Anyway, it's been a month since Cardan has been transformed into a snake, since Cardan and Jude has started to live together as the King and Queen of Elfhame but they have already established a routine, even if neither of them has noticed it until today.

Jude is always the first to wake up - Jude was raised by a general and Cardan by a prince, so that part is obvious. She dresses first, giving Mr. Lazy time to sleep, and then she wakes up sleeping beauty even though he always complains that while there aren't people busting into the room saying he's late, she's waking him up early. He never says he hates it. Jude suspects is because he can't lie. From then, Jude orders breakfast while Cardan dresses up, and they eat together before having to deal with their royal obligations.

Today, however, was different. Shockingly, Jude was able to have some good 6 hours of sleep and woke up a bit disoriented. See, this is the bad part about sleeping a lot. When you wake up, your senses take a while to turn on. That's definitely the reason why Jude barely sleeps, at least that's what she tells everyone when they ask her. Because of that, she took a bit to notice that she was alone in bed, which triggered something in her brain. She instantly gets out of bed and starts to look in every corner of their room repeating to herself that everything is fine, Cardan just woke up earlier and is dressing up or putting the hundred of layers that he puts every morning because "I know I look impressive naturally but I am the High King, Jude, I have to look perfect". Except he is nowhere to be found.

See, a small but important part of this quickly created routine was when Jude woke up and she would always look to the side and see Cardan relaxed and asleep, would look at his chest rise and fall and make sure that, yes, he's alive and, no, this last month was not a fever dream, he really is here. Without that confirmation, Jude is starting to spiral, and the fact that Cardan is not in the room doesn't help.

She tries to take a deep breath. She's the High Queen goddammit, she can't panic every time a minor routine change happens. But the truth is that she cannot take the deep breath. She cannot even take a small breath. She's pretty sure she's not breathing at all. But she has to because Cardan needs her. Jude goes through her options: one, he did wake up earlier, got knocked off in the room but somewhere hidden where she didn't check; two, he got knocked off somewhere in the castle and his unconscious body is lying there; three, he got abducted while he slept; four... Maybe last month was a fever dream. No, she is not going to think about option four.

While she does a more precise search through their room, she also tries to think of who would do this. He's the King of Elfhame, so it's obvious that he has a lot of enemies, but she is not remembering anyone who's this mad at him right now. However, her hands are trembling and there's still not enough air reaching her lungs, so maybe her memory is not the best at the moment. You were almost deadly stabbed before the incident.

Ok, he is not in the room, so option number two. This one is not the most likely. If someone knocked him off, they wouldn't just leave him in the middle of the corridor, and Faes don't just slip, so he couldn't have knocked himself out. Besides the palace is huge, it would take too long to search. Maybe you were less healed than you thought. Option number three it is. There are three windows in the room. The climb is hard but not impossible, she has done it herself while having a major injury. A major injury that could have been infected. Jude shakes her head and checks the three windows. None of them is broken and they are all locked from the inside, like they were when they went to sleep, which she knows because she always checks that before going to bed. Unless the person was a master spy (which is an option), she doesn't know how someone pulled that of. The other way into the room is through the door, so she quickly opens it, revealing two knights part of her security.

"Was there any disturbance last day?" She would be surprised that her voice somehow didn't fail if she was at all worried with that right now.

"We heard or seen nothing different than usual, your majesty."

"Have you fallen asleep or abandoned your post anytime during your shift?" The knights were visibly offended by that, but she had to clear all her options.

"No, your majesty. Is everyth-" Having her answers, Jude closes the door, leaving the knights to their jobs. If she was in her right mind she would have noticed that she was still in her bed clothes, her hair was mess, the room was worse and her hands still trembled and her breath was still labored. But she was not her in her right mind. Cardan is missing- He was not here at all. Her husband is missing and she is going to find him. Maybe he was taken outside their bedroom and there is going to be some kind of clue outside of it.

She is about to open the door again when a thought crosses her mind. The lover's bedroom. There is a pathway between that room and the High King and Queen's room. That is how whoever took Cardan got in. No one got in. Hallucinations caused by infections are common, at least for mortals. She slides through the pathway towards the other bedroom but is met with a similar scenario. No window was broken and all of them are closed from the inside, same with the door, no signs of breaking. Stop looking for what you won't find. You know you can barely remember anything after cutting Cardan's head off. It was the serpents head. You know that's the same thing. There was a battlefield where you broke down. You could have easily been stabbed. I would remember it. Would you? Sometimes, our mind purposely forgets traumatic memories. You could have passed out. No. You could have dreamt. Stop. Cardan is dead and you have been feeding yourself this fantasy because you can't deal with the guilt. STOP. You killed him and now you're living in a world without him and you'll keep living in it because that's the reality. I SAID STOP.

Jude. The sound of something breaking. She can't do it. She can't go back to those three days. She can't live without Cardan's mockery. She can't live without his laugh. She can't.

JUDE. She's shaking now, or someone is shaking her, she's not lucid enough to understand. God, he's her anchor. She doesn't know what to do without him. She wants to go back to sleep. She wants to go back to their routine. She wants to hear him complain about waking up early again. She wants to feel his fingers playing with her hair again. She wants-

JUDE! Cardan. She opens her eyes (since when were they closed?) and faces the love of her life's face. He looks adorably worried, full make up and hair nicely treated. She can't help but smile. "Cardan" she whispers, trying not to force her voice tired from screaming and crying (curious, she doesn't remember that). She puts her head in the space between his neck and shoulder and he starts rubbing circles on her back. "Stay" she pleads. Because that's what she's doing, pleading to the universe to let her stay in this fever dream, to have more time with Cardan, even if it isn't real, even if he's dead, even if that's her fault and there's just her to blame.

"Always" and that pisses her off. Because that's what Cardan would say, that's how Cardan looks, that's how Cardan acts and this mind prison has no right to be this close to reality.

"Liar" she spits. He looks mostly confused and a bit hurt but she doesn't care, this isn't real so nothing fucking matters.

"Jude, I would never abandon you-"

"But you did!" she's close to screaming now, but she doesn't care, her voice was cracking, but it doesn't matter. She has to get this out. "You abandoned me for three days because of that prophechy bullshit. You left me to rule Elfhame while simultaneously dealing with the schemings that my father and the frozen royalty was fucking doing and the fact that the love of my life was a goddam snake and then I, and I-" she can't get it out, she still can't believe it.

"You saved me."

"I killed you." she is fully sobbing now, but she can't stop. She gets up (she was sitting down?) and keeps going "You're dead and this is just a manifestation from my brain, because somewhere else I'm also dying and I hope I do because I can't live in a world where you're not. I physically will not be able to continue without you!" She sinks into the floor using the bed as support and Cardan sits in front of her. He has a puzzled expression in his face. They stay some time in silence, Jude catching her breath and Cardan trying to put pieces together.

"Why do you think I'm not real?" he finally asks, his voice tiny as if he's afraid of the answer.

"You weren't there." Jude matches his tone. "When I woke up. I always check to make sure you're there because if you are, then that means you're real and I'm not dreaming. At first, I thought you were kidnapped. That's why I'm here, I thought this was how whoever took you got in."

"My wife, scheming even when she's panicking." he's looking at her with that adoration in his eyes that never fails to take her breath away. "Let's keep scheming, shall we?" He looks at her, waiting for an answer so she nods. "You say that you are dreaming, you're in this coma and you can't wake up. Well, let's test this theory. Did you know that you can't read in dreams?" Another nod. Cardan gets up, picks a book from the bedside table and hands it to her. "Well, can you read?" The answer is yes. The book was a mortal romance that she was sure she had seen in Cardan's hands. That meant that this was real, Cardan was here and she hadn't killed him. Immediate relief washed over and with that came more tears that she hadn't noticed when they stopped. God, she was a mess. This is ridiculous, she is being ridiculous. Trying to look less like she just had a mental breakdown over nothing Jude attempts to clean the tears that don't stop. Of course this is reality, of course Cardan just woke up earlier and went to do god knows what. She's the fucking High Queen and she can't stand when her husband is out earlier, can't keep a cool head, can't-

"Stop." Cardan gently takes the hands that are trying to hide the tears that keep coming, why don't they stop? "Don't do that." His tone is gentle but secure and so goddamn grounding, how does he do it?

"Do what?"

"Close yourself. I could see the moment you realised that this was the reality because that was the moment the mask came back on. You're probably thinking that you don't have the right to feel this way because you can't show weaknesses or whatever bullshit your mind thinks of." Sometimes it's scary how well he knows her. "Don't close yourself from me." He is rubbing circles with his thumb on the back of her hand and it feels so right, everything about him feels so right.

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not." His tone is becoming more frustrated. "This is obviously bothering you, but I had no idea and because of my ignorance you just had a fucking panic attack." Her eyebrows went up. "I may have been reading about mortal psychology, but that's not important, what's important is," he moves his hands to cup her face and cleans the tears - that have finally stopped - with his thumb. "You don't have to pretend with me."

"You're one to talk." She retaliates but doesn't push him away. "You haven't said another word about those three days since I asked what it was like being a snake on the same day you stopped being one." Cardan laughs because he's Cardan and he laughs when he's nervous and he is not the only one who knows the other too well, she can see in his eyes that the thought of having to speak of those three days of hell terrifies him as much as her.

He moves to her side and sighs. "We really are made for each other, aren't we?" He seems to consider something before saying. "Let's make a pact. Whenever we want the other to open up, we say a code word and they have to do it after we reveal something that has been bothering us. No lies, no tricks, just the plain truth. Deal?" He gives her his right hand. It is always dangerous to make a deal with a fae, but this is Cardan, they have passed the backstabbing phase when she came back from exile. She takes his hand and shakes it.

"Deal. But we have to choose the word, something that we won't say normally."

"California." The place they went on their honeymoon instead of being on the two weeks celebrations of the Mortal Queen's victory over the serpent. The place where they were just two teenagers in love and not The Queen and King of Elhame, not the warrior and the prince, not the people with traumatic childhood, not the two broken pieces of what should be two whole people.

"Sounds great."

"I said it, so I start." He takes a deep breath and speaks. "I woke up earlier today because I had a nightmare. I wasn't someone trapped inside the snake like people like to believe, I was the snake. When the snake died, I died, even if for a few seconds." Jude takes a sharp breath, she always took comfort in the fact that she hadn't cut his head, but what was trapping him, that he hadn't felt anything. Cardan notices and takes both her hands and looks at her straight in the eyes. "I don't blame you, nor will I ever. If I say something assumimg the opposite, you have the premission to cut my head because that is not me. But as I was saying, when I saw you taking out the sword, I couldn't help but feel relief, but when you dealt the blow I, I-" another deep breath "I couldn't feel anything. I don't remember anything. I died. And that terrifies me. I was. I wasn't there. I replay that in my mind countless days, but today was so vivid, I couldn't fall back asleep, so I got out. I needed fresh air. I needed to be alone with my thoughts. I should've come back when it was time to wake up, I should've woken you, I didn't know that you needed that, but if I did, I would have done it."

They stay a few moments in silence, taking deep breaths and deep in thoughts.

"Your turn."

She wants to sugar-coat it. She wants to say that it wasn't that bad, she doesn't want to see guilt in his face even if it isn't his fault. But Cardan didn't sugar-coated when he revealed that what she did hurt him even if he knew it was going to hurt her. So instead, she says:

"Those were the worst three days of my life. I honestly thought it was going to be ok when we were negotiating with Madoc. That we won, they were going to surrender and we would be fine. Then I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe when Grimsen said that only death would save you. I went to Baphen, I went to the Old King, but all of them had the same answer. Somehow I had to rule the fucking kingdom while grieving a death that I didn't believe in. On top of all of that the court of teeths was on my throat, making plans to try to turn you and me into their puppets like their daughter. The relief that I had when I saw you alive was bigger than anything I thought I could feel, but the time between that and when I cutted the sna- your head it was my lowest. It was a hole and I was at the deep end with no way out. I cannot live without you." She stops to look at him. Look at his black hair and his eyes that look like black holes. His pale skin and his small mouth. No, she can't imagine a world without him. But that moment was close, so close. "I am so scared that I will go back to that void, I'm so scared that the universe wasn't as kind as I thought, I'm so scared to not wake up next to you."

He puts his arm around her shoulder and she puts her head on his. Jude looks up and sees tears running down Cardan's face, so she hugs him, feeling his other arm surround her. They stay silent for some time while Carden cries in Jude's shoulder and Jude just holds him close, all her tears wasted a few minutes ago.

"I'm sorry." Cardan was the one to break the silence.

"Not your fault."

"Liar."

"I wouldn't lie to you." It's the truth.

"May I remind you that you said you were fine while bawling your eyes out a few minutes ago?" OK, half true.

"When you have a nightmare, find me. I don't care if I just went to sleep, I don't care if I hadn't slept in days, I don't care if I'm not even asleep and you have to drag me out of my work, find me."

"When you feel like this is not real, find me. I don't care if you have to send someone to do it, I don't care if you run around the palace screaming my name, I don't care if I'm in the most important reunion, find me."

They break the hug to look at each other and say at the same time, "Deal".

"Sooo, do you want to have breakfast in bed and completely run away from our responsibilities?"

"We're the King and Queen of Elfhame."

"Exactly, there is no one above to stop us."

"We have an entire kingdom depending on us."

"Well, as the High King, I order you to stay in bed with me."

"As the High Queen, I'm going to refuse that order."

"Come on, you're mortal, you can say that we are sick or something." Jude's going to retaliate, but honestly? She's exhausted and spending the night in bed with her husband doesn't seem the worst idea.

"You are a horrible influence, do you know that?"

"Does that mean I win?"

She sighs. "Yes, you win."

"Yay" He says, getting up and doing a little spin like a child who was able to negotiate bedtime with their parents. She can't help but smile at his shenanigans.

Next, he does an extremely exaggerated bow and continues. "After you, my queen."

At that, she fully laughs, takes his hand and goes down the pathway with him. She hates being vulnerable, but with him, it isn't that bad. How do we take the armour off? A piece at a time. She feels like they just took another one.

-‐----------------‐-----------------‐----------------‐----------------

So, I had this idea since I finished Queen of Nothing and since I didn't see any fic like this I decided to make it myself. The characters may be a bit OOC, I'm not tha familiar with them. I am not a writer and my first language is not English, so apologies for any mistake. 🫶

Btw this was way bigger than I thought, no idea how many words, but damn, I'm having a brain riot.

[sicknessbysalem]

Novemetober (Rescheduled) | Day Five

@monthofsick | day five: undesirable caretaker

im not really feeling the last few days worth of prompts at this time, so i am going backwards and doing prompts that i was interested in

important note: as you may have seen @simplysickness asked me if i would take the reins of some of their old characters as they dont have time to write anymore. i have taken on the responsibility, but it is kind of scary. as it stands right now, i'm thinking i'm only collecting rowan/caspian and lex/soren. sparrow has told me i am welcome to make any background changes/turn the characters into my own (however, i speak with them often so i always get their approval first, lol). any hate/harassment will be blocked, as the original creator of these characters requested i take those reins.

now that that is out of the way it is fic time!

tw emeto, fever, implied abusive parent

Rowan knew this was going to be one of the worst state dinners to date. Granted, he thought that for every state dinner that he was forced to attend, but this one truly took the top spot for worst state dinners ever. And it hadn't even happened yet.

It started the day before they were supposed to leave. To catch their flight. He couldn't sleep, something didn't feel right. At the moment, he didn't feel sick, he just felt as though something was wrong. But it's the flight that solidifies both what was keeping him up, and that this state dinner would be the worst by far.

Rowan felt nauseous. Terribly so. Not even two hours in to the seven hour flight. He was dozing off while his mother was talking to him, giving him a run down of how his behavior should be. Every time he was dozing off, she would roughly nudge his arm to wake him.

"Listen to me," His mother demanded, "You need to behave, now more than ever."

"I'm listening, your highness," Rowan said, "You could have left me home."

"Absolutely not," The queen argued, "Not after your last stunt. Now, stay awake and listen."

Rowan tried, he did. But he was feeling worse and worse as time passed. Her words made him feel sicker, his mouth salivating and his throat growing tight. He didn't exactly have much faith in the idea that he wouldn't be sick before they even got where they were going.

"For the love of all things sacred," His mother said, "Listen. Can you do that for once?"

"I don't feel good," Rowan said softly.

"What did you say?" His mom asked.

Rowan took a deep breath, "I don't feel good. I feel like I'm going to throw up. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

The queen's eyes narrowed with disdain, "You can't be serious, Rowan. Not now.”

“I’m sorry,” Rowan sighed, “Really.”

“This is so typical of you,” Isabella glared at her son, “You always find a way to ruin everything.”

Rowan knew there was no sense in fighting her reprimands. He wished Caspian was here. Or really, anyone who would at the very least not make it out like he was a terrible person for something he couldn’t help.

The airplane's descent only intensified Rowan's discomfort, and by the time they landed, he was pale and visibly unwell. The royal entourage awaited them on the tarmac, and as Rowan stepped off the plane, he could barely stand. His mother, however, paid no mind to his obvious distress.

"We have a schedule to keep, Rowan," she insisted, her tone unwavering. "You will compose yourself for the state dinner. I won't have you embarrass the family any further."

Barely able to muster a response, Rowan did what he did best. He faked it. He took a deep breath, stood straight, fixed his attire. If he could just keep his mother happy, maybe this would be easier to manage.

The vehicle that awaited them seemed like a sanctuary, but as they approached, the reality sank in that there was no reprieve for him. The queen insisted he join her in the car, despite his plea for a moment to collect himself. He knew that meant several things. The car's interior felt suffocating, and Rowan sank into the plush seat, desperately trying to suppress the queasiness gnawing at him. Queen Isabella, however, showed no sympathy.

"You're always making a spectacle of yourself, Rowan," she scolded, her eyes fixed on him in the rearview mirror. "Do you realize the inconvenience you've caused? We can't afford any more scandals. Certainly not from you, the crown prince himself."

Rowan winced, not from his stomachache but from his mother's relentless words. He nodded weakly, unable to meet her gaze.

"I truly thought sending you to the conservatory would fix you, but here we are, as always causing issues when you can just leave well enough alone," Queen Isabella declared, her disappointment evident. "You're supposed to be the crown prince, for heaven's sake, not a burden. Not after your sister.”

As the car sped towards their destination, Rowan clung to the hope that this ordeal would soon be over.

Deep breath. In and out. In and out.

Rowan stood in front of the ornate mirror, trying to muster the energy to prepare for the state dinner.

He had barely managed to shower and change into formal attire when a wave of nausea hit him with relentless force.

Rowan took his suit jacket off. Then took off the button up. His stomach felt horrendous, yes, but he forced himself to stay composed to eliminate ruining his attire. Saving himself a lecture if nothing more.

Rowan clutch the sink, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths. He swallowed saliva, acid, anything. He tried to suppress the nausea to not avail.

He felt his stomach convulse, pulling in with a gag. A sick burp, he spit acid tasting saliva in the sink.

He tried to breathe. He ran the sink. Closed his eyes to ease the dizziness. Nothing helped. The prince retched into the porcelain bowl. The sound echoed in the opulent bathroom.

His mother was probably settling in herself. She probably wouldn’t hear his struggles. Rowan heaved again.

A little more acid, but Rowan could feel there was more. Too much more to stay at the sink.

He went to the toilet, heaving as soon as the lid was up. He heaved so hard that he fell to his knees.

He threw up once. Mostly water, the drink one of the royal assistants gave him that allegedly should have helped him feel better. For a moment, Rowan realized how sad it was that assistants cared more for him than his own mother.

He threw up a second time. It wasn’t much. He was sure it was the little snack and small breakfast from that morning. But thinking about breakfast made him recall dinner and lunch from the night before, and soon enough chunky waves of vomit came up his throat.

A third wave. A fourth. A fifth. Dry heaving. Rowan’s throat was burning, his nose running, and his vision blurred from tears of exertion.

He stood unsteadily. His breaths were shaking and everything felt strange, weak. He flushed the toilet, he rinsed his mouth with the water in the sink. Even rinsed it with mouthwash, not trusting his stomach’s ability to tolerate brushing his teeth again.

He stepped out of the bathroom, grabbed some water. He knew he would probably have to fake health, so the least he could do for himself is try to replace some of what he lost.

"I told you to compose yourself, Rowan," his mother's voice carried from the adjoining room. "We don't have time for your theatrics."

Rowan glanced at his reflection, his eyes reflecting a mix of evident sickness and frustration. The idea of attending the dinner seemed impossible, but Queen Isabella's relentless expectations loomed over him. He took a shaky breath, trying to steady himself.

"I'm really not feeling well," Rowan managed to say, his voice strained. "I think I need to skip dinner. For both of our sakes." Queen Isabella entered the room, her expression stern.

"This is not the time for your excuses, Rowan. You will attend, and that's final."

As Rowan struggled to stand upright, a fresh bout of nausea overcame him. He felt weak and defeated, but his mother's gaze remained unmoved. He leaned on the closest counter for support.

"Enough of this nonsense," his mother snapped. "You're not ruining this for us. Get yourself together and show some respect for your position."

Rowan sat at the table. He didn’t even know who all was here. Each conversation was blending into a cacophony of polite pleasantries. The scent of rich foods and fine wines filled the air, but to Rowan, they only intensified his nausea.

With each forced bite and polite sip, his stomach rebelled further, churning with discomfort. He tried to engage in conversation, to maintain the facade of the dutiful prince, but his efforts were futile. Every word spoken was an effort, every smile strained.

His mother, Queen Isabella, watched him like a hawk, her disapproving gaze a constant weight on his shoulders.

“You're not touching your food, Rowan," she remarked, her voice dripping with disdain. "Are you trying to embarrass me even further?"

Rowan forced a weak smile, pushing the food around his plate. "Just not hungry, Mother," he managed to murmur, his throat dry and constricted.

But as the dinner progressed, Rowan's condition deteriorated rapidly. The room spun around him, and everything around him felt like it became a blur of colors and sounds. Desperately, he reached for his glass of water, hoping to quell the rising tide of sickness within him.

Yet with each sip, the nausea intensified, and Rowan knew he was fighting a losing battle. He glanced desperately at his mother, silently pleading for understanding, but her expression remained cold and unforgiving.

Finally, unable to bear it any longer, Rowan pushed himself away from the table, his chair scraping against the polished floor. "Excuse me," he muttered, his voice barely a whisper. "I need to… I'll be back."

Queen Isabella's eyes flashed with irritation, but Rowan paid her no mind as he stumbled towards the exit, the world spinning around him. He barely made it to the nearest restroom before the contents of his stomach emptied, his body wracked with spasms of nausea.

As he leaned against the cool tiles, tears pricking at his eyes, Rowan knew that his mother's disapproval would have to wait. In that moment, his only concern was surviving the night, one agonizing moment at a time.

He heard the door swing open. Queen Isabella stormed into the restroom, her expression a mix of anger and disappointment.

“Rowan, this is unacceptable," she snapped, her voice cutting through the air. "You cannot simply excuse yourself from the dinner without a valid reason."

Rowan tried to speak, but another wave of nausea overtook him. He doubled over, retching violently as his mother watched with a mixture of irritation and disdain.

He threw up everything he tried to force down. To make matters worse, it was almost entirely undigested. It hurt a lot, and Rowan could feel the way he struggled to catch his breath. Before going through another round of vomiting.

When he finally managed to catch his breath, Queen Isabella's tone softened slightly, though her frustration remained evident.

"Fine, you're clearly unwell," she conceded, her words laced with skepticism. "But we can't have a scene. I'll tell the others you suddenly fell ill. But mark my words, Rowan, this will not be forgotten."

With a dismissive gesture, she signaled for her assistant to assist Rowan.

"Take him back to the suite," she ordered curtly. "And make sure he stays there. I won't have him causing any more trouble tonight."

Rowan's heart sank as he was led away, the weight of his mother's disappointment heavy on his shoulders. He knew he should have been relieved to escape the suffocating atmosphere of the dinner, but all he felt was a profound sense of loneliness and despair.

As the night wore on, Rowan's condition only worsened, each wave of nausea more debilitating than the last. Alone in the suite with his mother, Queen Isabella's displeasure was obvious. She paced the room impatiently, her frustration evident in every sharp exhale and furrowed brow.

"I can't believe you're still not feeling well," she muttered, her tone tinged with annoyance. "This is highly inconvenient, Rowan. You know I have important engagements tomorrow, as do you."

Rowan sighed softly, spitting in the trash can by the bed.

"I don't have time for this," Queen Isabella continued, her agitation mounting. "And to top it all off, you won't be able to take your medication tonight. Do you realize what a mess you're causing?"

Rowan's heart sank at her words, the weight of her disapproval crushing him further. He knew his mental health medication was crucial for stabilizing his condition, but to his mother, it was just another inconvenience. Everything was an inconvenience to her and he wished he was back home. Back with Caspian, he would even take Linnea right now. Someone who saw him as a person, not a problem.

"I'm sorry, Mother," he whispered, his voice barely audible above the tumult in his mind. "I can't help being sick."

Queen Isabella's expression softened slightly, though her frustration remained evident. "Well, you'll just have to get better quickly," she replied brusquely. "I can't afford to have you dragging down our responsibilities with your problems. Especially not my responsibilities. Your sister was never this much of a problem to me."

With a heavy sigh, she settled into an armchair, her gaze fixed on Rowan with a mixture of disdain and resignation. As he drifted in and out of consciousness, the only comfort he found was in the hope that eventually, he would find solace away from the suffocating expectations of royalty and the unyielding disapproval of his mother.

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

I'm Ready

Summary: You and Sabine have a discussion before your rescue mission

A/N: Hello Lovelies,

This is a special platonic story with our lovely Sabine Wren, for the wonderful @skyofnostars as a thank you for being lovely and amazing.

I hope you enjoy this.

Love oo

Warnings: Not a one. Aside from playful banter. However, if I do miss any please let me know. Oh, there is one. Just potentially finding out character is deceased. I think that's it.

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You sat outside looking up at Mandalore’s night sky.

“Are you coming in?”

“In a bit,” you answered, calling over your shoulder to Sabine, as she slowly walked over to you.

“What are you looking at?”

“Trying to think what the end of the galaxy would look like.”

She sat beside you, “You don’t have to come. Ahsoka and I can just take the experimental hyperdrive you’re working on. I don’t think I can handle it if something were to happen to you too.”

You let out a sigh, you knew it had kept her up nights, knowing Ezra was out there somewhere, and the last thing she wanted was to lose her second best friend, but you wouldn’t let her go on her own with Ahsoka, not if you could help. 

“No. I want to come with you, I know it’s scary and I promise I’ll do what I can to come back, and if it means getting Ezra back - - I want to go.” You turned to look at her, “You of all people, know how important it is for me, not just to prove my hyperdrive works,” you smirked at her, “but also because you both mean a lot to me.”

She nodded slowly as she leaned into your side, resting her head against yours, “I know, and despite my better judgement, that’s why I told Ahsoka we should come see you first.” Sabine shifted off your head and looked up to the sky again, “You really think this hyperdrive is going to work?”

“Well it’ll either send us to the other end of the galaxy or …”

“Or?”

“Sun bake us for fifteen minutes” you turned to look at her, meeting her eyes as you both laughed. As much as she may have asked, she trusted your math and engineering better than anyone else.  

She wiped her forehead, trying to push out the fear of not finding Ezra or worse finding him dead, she took in a shuddering breath, “Do you think we’ll get him back?”

You looked at her weighing the various possibilities and outcomes in your mind, one of the good things about being highly intelligent, was the ability to run through multiple what-if scenarios in a shortened time, “I think there’s a high probability we will get him back. You take into account his ability to survive the streets, irritate the Empire with little to no skills at the time, and mix in his training with Kanan and there’s no way he’d succumb just like that.”

Sabine nodded agreeing with your assessment, “And if worst comes to worst, at the very least we’d all get the closure we’re needing, right?”

You turned to look at her smirking, “That doesn’t sound like you. That sounds practically optimistic. Do you have a fever?” You pressed the back of your hand to her forehead, only for her to  flick your hand away, laughing.

“Hey! I’m optimistic,” she teased smacking your thigh with the back of her hand.

“I’m kidding,” you giggle holding up your hand in surrender, “I know you are. Now, do you feel better about this rescue?”

She nodded, smiling, “Yeah, I do.”

“Good, then I’m going inside,” you stood stretching your limbs, “I’ll see you in the morning, get some rest.”

“I will. Night.”

kWith that you walked in hoping that maybe this time tomorrow or maybe even a few days from now, you’d be able to see Ezra in the flesh and run into his arms.

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Tag list:

@liadamerondjarin @badbatch-simp24@spicymcnuggies@lady-ren @firstofficerwiggles @darkangel4121 @discofern @kavecika @monako-jinn-stories @ladykatakuri @avathebestx @theroguesully @furyhellfire66 @carodealmeida @ciramaris @sprout-fics @twinkofthedink @dindjarin-mandalorian @ulchabhangorm @tortor-mcgee @vodika-vibes @clonethirstingisreal

[bellysoupset]

hii! i wanted to request something with wendy and jonah bc omg their friendship is so precious to me and i need more of them :’)

i’d love for wendy to be the sickie (emeto and high fever pretty please?) and i was thinking jonah could maybe find out she’s really not doing well bc she’s kinda delirious over text and not making any sense? adding vince as a second caretaker would also be awesome teehee but no pressure!

also if you hate this idea then literally anything wendy+jonah would be good enough lmao i just love their friendship so freaking much 🫶🏽

I loved this idea! People have been asking for some sickee Wendy for a while, so I hope this one delivers! TY for the request 💕

----

It had been ages since Jonah had last gone out with Wendy. Between Vince's car accident, their opposing schedules, classes starting back up and everything else, he couldn't remember the last time they had talked despite being on joint medical duty every other night.

Jonah smiled as he felt JD rubbing between his ankles, circling him. He crouched down, petting her behind her ear and heard a huff.

"Don't give this traitor attention, Jasmine Dean Wagner," Leo scoffed from the couch. He had his arms crossed and was pouting and while most of it was played up for the sake of humor, Jonah knew part of it was real too.

"You go out with the guys all the time," Jon smiled, picking up the kitten and planting a kiss on her little head, carrying her back to the couch.

"It's not the same," Leo said, reaching to snatch the cat and snuggling her to his chest, "none of the boys are trying to steal me away from you."

"And Wendy is?" Jonah rolled his eyes and leaned in, planting a kiss over Leo's pout, "no one is stealing me away. Don't wait up," leaning over the couch, almost upside down, he planted a kiss on Leo's forehead and gave JD one last scratch behind her ears.

"I'm changing the locks while you're gone!" Leo yelled behind him, but Jonah ignored it.

Wendy was waiting for him outside her building and she was dressed for the thirties. Gone was the jeans and frilly shirts he saw her wearing in between shifts, today she was clad in a puffy short dress that caused him to roll his eyes in an amused manner.

"Ariana Grande called, she wants her closet back."

"She can come fight me for it," Wendy smiled, entering the car, "I'm so excited."

There were certain hobbies he could only indulge with Wendy. Leo, with much pleading, might watch an A24 movie, but he didn't like it. Going to an amateur queer cinema showing? That was out of question.

Wendy, in the other hand, was jumping up and down with excitement, her arm locked with his and talking nonstop about all the new artists.

It was in a dimly warehouse, the type of place Jonah would never step foot in. Wendy had been the one to find out about them and she was the one who had the tickets.

"Just pick wherever you want to sit and don't forget to cheer and clap if you think the short is worth it. This is a safe space for tears," the boy at the front desk told them and Jonah had to press his lips together not to laugh, "in between sessions we'll have food carts. Enjoy your night."

"It's a safe space for tears," Jonah whispered in her ear, voice all mocking and Wendy jammed her elbow on his side.

"Bet you'll cry."

The first movie was a comedy, so he doubted that. However by the third one, if his eyes burned a little and he had to swallow the knot in his throat... It was none of Wendy's business.

"Here," she handed him a hot dog, stuffed with everything, "fuel up."

"This cannot be safe to eat," Jonah eyed it weirdly, cringing as Wendy wolfed down on her own. She rolled her eyes.

"It's good! Just have one bite."

With much prodding and pushing, he took one bite. By now he was starving so he blamed it on his hunger, because Jon was pretty sure that was the best hot dog he had ever eaten.

He leaned back against the plastic chair, stretching his legs ahead and Wendy smiled at him, "admit it. It's great."

"It's alright."

"Damn, doctor Banks!" she teased, pushing his leg, "a compliment from you!"

"You're such a prick, Wendy," he rolled his eyes.

She was all smiles as she leaned on his side, head resting on his shoulder and finished off her hot dog. The lights turned off once more for the second part of the showing.

He was sucked in by it. The next two were gory horror movies, one of them framing the queer experience through the eyes of a werewolf and while the special effects were more than a little choppy and the acting far from stellar, Jonah was mesmerized. So much so he barely noticed Wendy shifting on her seat multiple times.

It was at the very ending of the last short movie that she got up, pushing his leg, "I need some fresh air," she mumbled and Jonah handed her her purse without thinking, eyes glued to the screen.

The movie ended and he got up, feeling dizzy and floored. The director was sitting just a couple seats ahead - the joys of amateurish cinema - so Jon walked up to them, almost bouncing on his feet.

By the time he got outside, the whole place was basically deserted.

"There you are!" Jonah exclaimed as he saw Wendy leaning against his car, "what are you doing out here, it's freezing!"

"Jon-"

"I talked with the director of the last movie, they're really really cool, Dee. You should've been there. Invited them over for dinner, Leo's going to d- Wendy?"

Only then he got a good look of her face. Wendy was more than pale, she was basically transparent and she was shaking, whole face glowing with the clammy sweat.

"Wendy, what's wrong?"

"I don't feel well," she sighed and he noticed she was hugging her middle. Her dress was puffy and it started right under her chest, so he couldn't see her stomach at all, but he cringed just at the thought, "I'm sorry, Jon..."

"I said those hot dogs weren't safe to eat," he scoffed, moving closer and already feeling vaguely nauseous himself. Had them both gotten food poisoning? Wendy was almost an entire foot shorter than him, maybe it had hit her harder and sooner...?

"I don't think..." she shuddered, "I don't think it's food poisoning, Jon... I'm freezing."

Knowing what she meant, he cupped her face and met blazing hot skin, "Oh darling..." Jon groaned, "you're burning up."

She shivered again and he wrapped an arm around her, opening the car door, "c'mon, I'll drive you home."

She got in obediently and Jonah quickly circled the car, getting in the driver's side, "this hit me out of nowhere..." Wendy moaned, leaning her head back.

"A fever this high?" Jonah frowned, hand cupping her forehead, then her neck, "bullshit, Wendy."

"Uhm?" she groaned, turning her head to look at him through dazed eyes, "what do you mean?"

"There's no way you had a fever this high just hit you out of nowhere, Wendy," he pulled his hand back, starting to drive "were you feeling sick before?"

"No," she scoffed, shoving his thigh, "no, I was fine... I had a headache earlier, but I thought it was just stress..."

Jonah huffed in discontent, but didn't continue to antagonize her. He was getting a headache from stress. Without thinking, he reached in and squeezed her knee, in a reassuring manner.

"Uhm," Wendy planted her hand over his and leaned forward, her forehead meeting the dashboard, "I think... Pull over, Jon."

Although she was still enunciating her words quite well, he didn't take any chances. He turned up the emergency lights and pulled over the side of the empty road.

Wendy let out a groan as she opened the door and staggered out to the back of the car.

He appreciated her having half a mind about his sympathy sickness, but it didn't sit right with him. He watched her via the rearview mirror, leaning over the back, gagging once, twice and then disappearing from view.

Jon cringed, throwing his door open, "Wendy? Are you okay?"

"I'm fi-INE!" she yelled back and he sat there, heart on his throat, one leg in and one out. He drummed his fingers nervously against the steering wheel, hearing another retch and then a whimper, followed by sobs.

"Fuck it," Jonah sighed, getting up and rushing to the back.

Wendy had fully fallen down. She was on all fours and crying over a puddle of sick, her wavy brown hair sticking to her lipgloss.

Jonah gagged, then slammed a fist against his mouth and forced his stomach to stay in place as he crouched down next to her and held her hair back, "are you-" he swallowed in thickly, the hot dog churning, "are you done...?"

"...'mdizzy," Wendy groaned and he noticed she had scraped her hands on the road.

"C'mere, Wen-" he wrapped an arm around her back, pulling her back on her feet and dragging her as far away from the puddle of vomit as he could, while still stay near the back of the car, "are you done? Are you gonna be sick again?"

"Not sure," she leaned her head in, forehead meeting his chest and her knees gave in, causing Jonah to let out a gasp and rush to grab her. It was a good thing he was much taller than her, otherwise she'd have fallen badly.

He held her against the car back, cupping her face, "okay, next time just puke out of the door... Let's get you back in the car."

Wendy had scrapped her knees too when she went down and they were bloody, one rivulet of blood had ran down her left knee and disappeared into her boots.

"You're a mess," Jonah sighed, strapping her back inside the car and gathering all of Wendy's hair into a knot behind her hair, "do you have a hair tie?"

"Purse..." she slurred, rubbing a hand over her face, "shit, Jon, everything is twirling."

"You need to cool down," Jon said, digging in her purse for a scrunchie and failing, "stay put-" he turned the purse over, emptying it's contents on her lap and grabbing the pink scrunchie, "there you go- Perfect" she looked like a yorkshire, with all her hair gathered to the top of her head.

Wendy let out a small smile, "can we go home?"

"Yeah, yeah, in a second," he pushed all the objects back inside her purse and rushed back to the driver's seat, "tell me if I have to pull over again, alright?"

"Hmmm," Wendy pressed her forehead to the window, swallowing in thickly, "was the last movie good?"

Jonah let out a surprised chuckle and squeezed her leg again, "it was amazing... Try napping, I'll wake you up as soon as we get there."

"I miss Vin," she said in a tiny voice, curling up against the door, "this fucking sucks."

Jonah cringed. He knew part of this was his fault. In his eagerness to have Vince stay at his place, it hadn't occurred him that Leo and Wendy avoided each other at all costs and that had severely impacted how many of her already scarce free hours she could spend visiting. Sure, Vince was now back to his own dorm, but clearly Wendy was still hung up on those six weeks she had barely seen him.

"I'm sorry, Dee," he rubbed her arm in an attempt to comfort her, "I'm gonna call him up as soon as we get to your place, okay? Better?"

She sniffled pitifully, "it's not fair," Wendy said, forehead pressed to the window and shivering violently, "I don't... I don't understand."

Jonah swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth, speeding up "it's the fever speaking, Wen, try to get some rest..."

She hummed something unintelligible and pressed more against the door, curling up in her seat. Jon glanced her direction, but it seemed she had settled down.

He drove quietly, worry eating at him. The thought she had been feeling sick for a while and it had passed him by was unnerving, to put it mildly.

Just as they arriving back to her apartment building, Jon reached in, shaking her awake, "Wendy," he rubbed her arm, "Wen, I need your password to open the garage."

"Uhm?" she groaned, curling up further, "I don't feel good..."

"I know," Jonah kept the impatience from his voice, "I need your password to get the car inside the garage, Wendy."

"Ugh, it's..." she squinted, rubbing a hand over her face, struggling to remember, "2011"

"So very safe," Jon rolled his eyes, typing it in the keypad and then parking in one of the designated slots for guests. He sighed, turning off the car and getting out, circling it to her side and opening the door, "how steady are you feeling?"

"...'mnot a baby," Wendy groaned, grabbing his jacket and using it to hoist herself up. Jonah's hands hovered and, for a good reason, because the second she attempted to stand up straight, her knees gave in.

"o-kaAY!" Jonah huffed, putting her arms around his neck and picking her up, "grab your purse."

Wendy obeyed, then turned her face and pressed her nose to his shoulder, "I'm sick, Jon."

"Sherlock Holmes herself," he rolled his eyes, pushing the car door closed with his hip and walking towards the elevator. Inside the small, empty cubicle, he could hear very clearly as her stomach gurgled and Wendy hiccupped, muffling a sick burp.

"Don't puke on me," he warned her and Wendy nodded, not daring to open her mouth, face extremely pale. He cursed, pressing the button again, as if that could make the elevator go faster.

"Jon-" Wendy groaned a second later, squeezing his shoulder and struggling against him, "Jon- Put me-" she gagged, "put me down-"

He obeyed immediately, cursing under his breath as she bent in half and almost fell, causing him to have to grab her by the waist, "please, Wen... Just- We're almost there."

She nodded, breathing in deeply, letting it out through her mouth, not saying anything. Jonah almost jumped with relief when the elevator hit her floor and he grabbed her by the waist with both hands, pulling her out like a ragdoll.

Wendy groaned, bracing against the door of her apartment and clamping a hand against her mouth as she watched Jonah search for her key, "hu- HRURKK-" a retch interrupted her and Wendy groaned loudly, eyes squeezed shut, "hurry-"

"I'm going, I'm going-" Jonah turned the knob, "okay, c'mere-"

Although he grabbed her hand, Wendy pushed him off the way and staggered dizzily inside, hitting her desk with her hip and causing one of the trinkets to fall. She didn't stop.

There was no way she was making it to the suite, so instead she entered the kitchen area and leaned over the sink, gagging violently.

Jonah cringed, turning his face away, but walking closer despite his whole body wanting for him to leave. He rubbed her back with one hand, keeping the other on her waist in case her knees gave in again.

There was a loud, gross burp and then her whole frame shook and Jonah whimpered as he heard vomit falling inside the sink. He swallowed the saliva pooling in his mouth, rubbing her back a little harder and thumping on it when it seemed she was choking.

"You cannot have more to throw up, Wen-" his voice was thick with nausea and Jonah ducked his head, letting up a wet belch that burned his throat and offered zero relief. He felt stuffed to the gills, even though he really wasn't.

"Just-god," she whimpered, sounding dangerously close to tears, "leave then-" Wendy turned to glare at him and Jonah winced. Her hazel eyes were very green thanks to how bloodshot they were and she was vomit clinging to her chin. He fought a gag, knowing it'd only make the situation worse.

"I'm not leaving," Jonah scoffed, squeezing her nape, "you're small, there's no way you have more to hurl, is what I meant."

She promptly proved him wrong by groaning, "ohmygod-" and burying her head in the sink again, vomiting up an impressive amount and then dry heaving painfully.

Jon kept the hand that was on her waist put, but removed the one on her back in order to press his fist to his mouth as his whole spine shuddered with a retch.

"I..." she panted for air, trembling, "I- I think I'm done..."

No sooner had she turned the tap to rinse out the mess, Jonah was pushing her to the side and retching violently. It was too much and no amount of fighting it would do.

The hot dog, still tasting too close to the real thing, came up and his repulsion in seeing the bits and pieces clinging to the metallic inside of the sink was enough to send him into another burpy-gagging fit. Jonah groaned, loudly, and then gulped down some of the tap water, forcing up a burp that brought with it the still clear water and some chunks.

He gasped for air, braced against the sink's granite countertop, "sorry, Wen..." his throat was raw, chest heaving for air and Jonah turned to look at her... Only to find that Wendy was bent over the counter and crying, "hey..." he frowned, "why the hell are you crying?"

"You're sick and I'm gross and everything- everything hurts and I miss my boyfriend and your stupid boyfriend hates me and doesn't- doesn't want me around and my belly is so sick and-" she ranted on and Jonah couldn't help but let out a chuckle.

"Okay, Dee, you're delirious," he scoffed, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and moving closer, cupping her face and wiping away the mascara tears with his thumbs, "let's put you to bed."

"No," she whined pitifully, leaning forward and hiding her face in his chest, "I'm gonna puke again."

"No way," Jonah rolled his eyes, rubbing her back and noticing the heat rolling off of her, "you need some meds too, darling."

"No..." she mumbled, voice muffled by his shirt and he scoffed.

"It wasn't up for debate," Jonah patted her naked thigh, "c'mon. Move, Wendy."

With much prodding and pushing, he managed to get her in the suite, lying on her side with a bucket by her head, still whining.

Jonah sighed, sitting next to her and pushing the stray hairs away from her eyes, "meds staying down?"

"Doubt," she mumbled, leaning over to spit in the bucket, "can you..." her cheeks turned red and Wendy frowned, then waved it away, "forget it."

"No," Jonah glared at her, "what is it?"

She hesitated for a second, then said in a small voice, "could you stay?"

"And get your flu from hell?" Jonah teased, but there had never been any other option in his mind. Her gaze dropped, wounded and disappointed, and he rolled his eyes, "don't be ridiculous, I'm not leaving when you're this sick, Wendy."

"But you're gonna catch it," the rebuttal was weak, colored with relief and he smiled.

"Yeah, because you care so much right now," Jonah got up, kicking off his shoes, "please, please don't puke on me," he crawled in the bed and Wendy let out a happy sigh, turning around so she could press her face to his arm.

"You're the best," she said sleepily and Jonah glared at the top of her head, his cheeks burning. He felt her scoot closer, all vulnerable and let out a groan, "really. I love you."

"Well, duh, you better," he said lightly, rubbing her back and then kissed the top of her head, figuring he was absolutely doomed after having Wendy breathe on his face as she had earlier, "I love you too. Now go the fuck to sleep."

[putschki1969]

Hikaru Solo Live Details (Live Broadcast)

【LIVE Announcement】 For the first time in a long while, Hikaru will be holding a solo live! 🎵 Details about the upcoming live have been revealed on May 20 during a special live stream on the mobile app Music Champ☺️ Wasn’t able to watch the beginning since Keiko decided to do an Instagram Live and obviously, I couldn’t miss out on that XD

Details Date: Date: 2023/0723 Doors open: 17:00 | Start: 17:30 Title: B-day LIVE 2023 -Be the Best day- Venue: CLUB SEATA Tickets: https://eplus.jp/hikarulive/ Lottery period: 2023/5/20 22:00～2023/5/27 23:59 General sale: 2023/6/3 12:00～2023/7/20 18:00 Back-up band: HaKA, Yuki, Yuhei Hisama, Hiroaki Tanabe, Yusuke Suga Notes: The hall has a capacity of 500 people (standing), however, there will be seats for this event so I’m not sure how many people will fit into the venue. According to Hikaru, there will be no guests, no home video release and as of right now, no live stream option.

⁡In other news, Hikaru will hold a special live broadcast on Music Champ on July 2 (19:00~; Sunday) to celebrate her birthday together with us fans. There’s also some sort of “fever” campaign planned, ”fever” is the red firey thingy at the top of each broadcast I think, there’s another orange thingy which also needs to be increased. Not sure about the specifics. Sounds like viewers need to increase Hikaru’s “fever” amount leading up to/during the stream in order to be eligible for a handful of special presents/benefits (e.g. digital photobook for 100 million fever points). A high “fever” number seems to be achieved by buying in-app-items or maybe it’s just necessary to interact a lot and send free emojis? No idea. I don’t understand apps like this at all. Ughh, I really don’t like how this app is forced down our throats...

Live Corner (during today’s broadcast) Hikaru is joined by HaKA (Kenichiro Hakariya), a member of SPICE and C.C.C and the composer of Ambient Border as well as Hikaru’s more recent freelance songs. I love that Hikaru has been singing a lot during her broadcasts lately (inlcuding Kalafina songs) but I hate that I still haven’t figured out how to record those streams T_T 1. Survivor

■App「Music Champ」Download ・App Store https://apps.apple.com/us/app/musicchamp/id1511895708 ・Google Play https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.music.champ

[waterfallofspace]

Letting It In & Letting It Go (1/3)

The one in which K/azuki learns to let his feelings in, and R/ei learns to let his walls go down, at least a little. Feat. Sick R/ei, caretaker K/azuki, and heavy ship implications (cough outright statements cough), though, they aren’t in a relationship at this point. (Pre-M/iri, maybe one day I’ll write something post, but right now this was rotting my brain, so I’m getting it out) AKA: I have a problem and I can’t stop writing B/uddy D/addies content, so here is the second fic that no one asked for hahaha~ UPDATE: PART TWO (linked for ease of access!!)  Part 3 is not written yet, but I do know what I want to do with it, so once I’ve found the time/inspiration, I’ll release it too. (just incase anyone wants to see the ramblings of a crazy person hahaha~) (references to smoking, really high fevers, trauma, and swearing, incase you don’t like any of those)

Also, I am from the land of poutine and ‘sorry’s, so temperatures are written in Celsius, but for reference: 36°C is about 96.8°F 39°C is about 102.2°F

Characters: R/ei, K/azuki, and some ANGST Word Count: 5.2k

It wasn’t unusual for Kazuki to arrive home to the smell of smoke wafting from the apartment. In fact, it was actually a bit worrying that the smoke alarms had never gone off. ‘Mental note, check those.’ However what was unusual was the sound of rough coughing that echoed off the walls as he left his shoes neatly next to the pile Rei had left his in.  “Rei? I’m home, are you al-”

He’s cut off by the sight awaiting him on the couch. An ashtray sits on the table, the smoke wafting from it seemingly melting into the air, as Rei convulses with lung spasms that borderline on worrying. “What, you forget to blow out the smoke or somethin’?” “No.” “Just not agreeing with you today?” “Close enough.” ‘Ever the wordsmith’ Kazuki mused, deciding to leave it alone. It’s not as if he’s never choked on a drink here or there, and bringing attention to the mistake isn’t exactly his favourite subject of conversation either. Deciding to instead focus on cooking dinner, Kazuki unloaded the groceries he had been out purchasing while Rei wasted away on the couch. A noise caught his attention, but when he looked up Rei was learning back in his usual spot, controller in hand. His position was relaxed, legs brought up on the couch, arms hanging slightly, controller gripped loosely, eyes fixed on the screen. And yet, every muscle of his being screamed tense. He had the uncanny skill to appear completely dejected and exhausted, while still keeping every ounce of his being on edge, as if he was prepared for attack at any moment. Kazuki had always secretly admired that level of training, though he didn’t doubt the methods used to achieve such perfection were less than pleasant. Rei didn’t speak about his childhood much. ‘I mean, he doesn’t speak much anyways, but specifically about that particular topic, he has less to say than normal’.  He thought, turning his attention back to the simmering pot in front of him.  A few more strange noises caught his attention, but he couldn’t pinpoint the source, so he just chalked it up to Rei’s game. He never did fully understand the appeal of those. He figured they were just something you had to be into to really appreci-

“nNgt-!” 

If Kazuki hadn’t already had his eyes fixed on the couch, he would have missed it entirely. Swallowed into near silence, with only a slight jerk of the head, ‘Hands free, pretty impressive, if not a bit terrifying’ Rei had seemingly stifled a sneeze out of existence.

For as good as he was at assassination, planning, playing a part, and being subtle, that was one aspect that Kazuki had never had the fortune of mastering. The art of controlling his body and emotions. When he sneezed, he was sometimes able to muffle it, but fully stifling it was a pipe dream at best. He just lacked the muscle control, and honestly, the will to. It always sounded extremely unsatisfying, if not painful. Rei, however, did not share these downfalls. He supposed it, again, had something to do with his upbringing.  Kazuki soon quelled this line of thinking. Even theorizing about it just to himself in his mind felt like overstepping boundaries. Rei clearly had reservations about talking about it, walls up that he wasn’t eager to pull down, and it wasn’t his place to attempt to scale them. 

“kgNtt-! nNkT-! hH’ngxt-!” “Bless you.” “What?” Kazuki chuckles softly at the rough reply. Rei’s voice was gruff on a good day, but after the coughing from earlier, and the sneezing, it had taken on a slightly hoarse tone, stuffy around the edges.  “I said bless you. It’s a form of pleasantries that one offers when someone else sneezes. Or, alternatively, ‘bless me’ is used when one sneezes and offers themself said pleasantry.”

“Why are you using that voice? You sound like an idiot.” “Why you- I do not! I sound well educated! That was my formal-” “It sounds weird.” Kazuki grips his chest, mouth hanging open, before huffing a sigh and bringing the plates he had so carefully arranged to the table. “Oh whatever, just come eat before it gets cold.” “Not hungry.” Well that was new. And concerning. While he never gave Kazuki the thanks for his food that he definitely deserved, Rei usually at least had the mind to eat it. Sometimes he left parts he didn’t like, such as his vegetables, or a piece of perfectly good meat that had ‘a weird texture’. But outwardly refusing all food? That was certainly not commonplace. “Are you sure? If you don’t want this, I could pull something else together, not that you’d appreciate it anyways- But I don’t want you complaining later that I didn’t feed you.” “I won’t.” And that was that. Kazuki ate his portion, opting to store Rei’s in the fridge just incase he changed his mind and wanted something later. Another round of coughing pulled his eyes back to the cough, Rei curled into himself, hiding his face deep in his sleeve. “You alright?” “YeahH-! hH’NNgxt-!” “Real convincing. Look,” He began, running a hand down his face with a light sigh as Rei held up a hand to stop him, before doubling over into a clenched fist. “hH’Nnnt-! Hehh’kkggnt-! nNgt’chh-!”  “Bless you. Look, if you’re hungry later, the food is in the fridge. Just stick it in the oven for a few minutes, it’ll warm up enough to eat. It’s a perfectly manageable task, I know you can do it. As for me though, I’m going to bed. We have a job the day after tomorrow and I’ve still got a lot of planning to get done.”

“Okay.” “Oh, what’s that? ‘Oh Kazuki, thank you so much for doing all of the planning and putting in hours and hours of work so that our jobs go down the way we want’? You’re so welcome, thank you for noticing!” “I’m usually the one that actually lands the shot.” Kazuki bites his tongue, hand flying to his mouth at the audacity of the accusation, before releasing his breath, deciding it’s not worth the effort. “Night Rei.” “Yeah.” With that, he headed off to shower before bed, faintly hearing another round of coughing begin as he turned on the water. He elected to ignore it, ‘problems for another day’ and all that.  ~~~~~~~

“hH’NGxxt’shh-!” “Bless you.” “Ihh’kngt-!”

“Bless you.” “Do you have to do that?” “Sorry, habit.” “hh’nnXGT-!”  “Ble-”

Kazuki stops himself, electing for a slightly embarrassed shrug as Rei’s eyes flicker off the screen to study him for a moment. Neither of them breaks the silence. An unspoken agreement to let it go seems to pass through the air, and Rei turns his attention back to the cars on the screen. A kart racing game, Kazuki believes. He’s never actually tried it himself. Rei’s never offered, and he’s never asked. It’s probably for the best anyways- it’s not like he’s a sore loser or anything! He’s just a bit of a perfectionist… and, oh come on, who enjoys losing?  “H’ngxt-!uhhh” 

This one is followed by an itchy sounding cough, rattling his lungs a little deeper than Kazuki is comfortable with. When he asked Rei earlier if he was alright, he got an eye roll, sigh, and more coughing in response. Asking again now would probably yield the same result, but there was no point anyways. It was clear that the guy was sick, just a question of how bad it was. Not like he’d get an answer to that either.

“Snnfff-!” And then there was that. Throughout the day, Rei had been stifling into near silence, however this method was not without consequences. For one thing, they sounded incredibly itchy, the force only building as the day dredged on. More importantly however, the near constant sniffling that Rei seemed dedicated to ignoring.

“Snfff-”  After another five minutes of this, Kazuki finally had it. Closing his notepad, (maybe a little harsher then he meant) he stood up, and threw a tissue box at the couch.

“Just blow your nose. You’re literally driving me insane over here, I can’t hear my own thoughts.” Rei said nothing, but a slight pink tint seemed to race across his cheeks, before they were quickly hidden by a handful of tissues. He did blow, but Kazuki could tell he was holding back, it was soft and subdued, not at all the harsh, relieving feeling that his sinuses must be longing for. “You can go all out, I don’t mind. It’s not like I’ve never been sick before, I get it.” As soon as the words hit the air, Kazuki felt an unmistakable urge that he’d made a critical mistake. Normally this kind of chest-tightening anxiety came on a job when something crucial in his plan failed, but the look that Rei shot him over his hands was enough to freeze him in place. It wasn’t anger, it wasn’t annoyance, shit, it wasn’t even embarrassment. It was fear. Genuine, bone-chilling, terror. Something in his demeanour suddenly reminded Kazuki of a cornered animal. Despite remaining perfectly still, it was like Rei was suddenly pacing, looking for the perfect moment to strike and run. “Who said I was sick?” The words nearly knocked Kazuki over, breaking eye contact as his hand connected roughly with the table to keep him upright. “W-what? Sorry, what? Uhh… no one, but you’ve been coughing and sneezing all of today, a-and you were yesterday too, so I just figured…” “Oh.”  ‘Oh? That’s all he has to say, oh? He just looked at me like I killed someone he loved right in front of him, and ‘oh’ is all he has to say about it?’ 

“It’s okay if you are, ya know. We can cancel the job if you don’t feel up t-”

“No.” The firmness of the response left a bad taste in Kazuki’s mouth. Almost like blood, but more bitter. Like the word itself had cut his tongue, and left traces of its bitter tone behind. “Okay, that’s fine, we can do it then. I’m not gonna bail on money if you think you’re up to it. Especially after all the planning I put into this plan. I think it’s one of my best so far, so we start out…” Kazuki continued rambling, suddenly desperate to fill the silence with something easy and normal. Just a job, just two partners talking about a job. The tension was thick enough to choke him, his words starting to stumble over each other as Rei broke off with another harsh bout of coughing. Finally, Rei interrupted his monologue, ‘thank god’.  “I’m gonna sleep. Tell me about my part on the ride there tomorrow.”

He wanted to tell him to take some meds before he slept, but the memory of the pure terror in Rei’s eyes was enough to quiet him instantly. Instead, he offered a muted “night” as Rei slowly stood, trembling almost unnoticeably, before making his way towards the bathroom. Kazuki glanced at the clock, ‘heading to bed at seven, that can’t bode well…’ before deciding to make a bit of food to relieve some of the tension that had built up in his neck and shoulders. Cooking has always been a way of destressing for him, even before he moved in with Rei. He’s always considered it an art form, and despite how unappreciated it goes in this household, the satisfaction of making something beautiful out of a mess of ingredients will never lose its shine.  After a nice meal, with a slice of the cake he had baked earlier for dessert, he finally sat down and ironed out the details of the plan, setting aside the details Rei would need to memorize, along with a basic overview of the background intel. He gently stacked those papers on the couch, next to Rei’s controller, before letting out a yawn, and heading up to bed himself.

~~~~~~~ Sometime during the night Kazuki had been woken by a rough bout of coughing coming from downstairs, followed by a few harsh, “hH’ZZSCHHoo-! hAH��SHH’OO-! Hehh- hH’KKSSHHH’oo-!” Groaning slightly, he had turned back over and drifted off again, faintly aware of the coughing continuing as his eyes fluttered back shut. It felt like seconds later when he finally opened his eyes again, the soft light of morning creeping in under his door. A glance at his phone showed the time to be closer to nine, definitely a more reasonable time to be awake.

Kazuki stumbled out of bed and flipped on the light. He started reaching for the shirt he had set aside, rerouting to his shoulder as a soft “ehh’shhiew! hIH’kshhiew!” surprised him. It wasn’t unusual for him to get a couple sneezes right after waking up. He didn’t quite know why, but the biology of the issue wasn’t really a concern. It was harmless enough, it’s not like he often had to actually sleep and wake up while remaining silent on a job.  Pulling on his shirt, and wiping the sleep from his eyes, Kazuki started down the stairs, pausing once he reached the kitchen, eyes roaming over to the couch where Rei was-

Sleeping. He was sleeping, controller sprawled on the floor, television still on, the game showing a pause screen. Rei still being asleep at nine was nothing new, but the tissues that he still had grasped in his hand were definitely not a normal part of the equation.

That, and the fact that he was curled up without a blanket, and yet, somehow still was clearly radiating heat, were enough to stir a bad feeling in Kazuki’s gut. He walked over to Rei, careful to keep his steps light, and gingerly placed his hand against the sleeping man's forehead, wincing at the burning he was met with.  Dark eyes shot open, freezing Kazuki right where he stood, hand still pressed against Rei’s face. The two of them locked eyes, neither blinking, nor moving, Kazuki’s wide, and Rei’s bleary, as if he was still readjusting to being awake.

After what felt like hours, Kazuki finally got it together enough to pull away, nearly jumping out of his skin when a shaky hand grabbed his arm, and brought his fingers back to their previous position. “Feels good, you’re cold.” The words aren’t slurred, but they definitely lacked the clarity of someone who was fully with it. Kazuki almost thought about staying like this, seeing as this much physical contact being initiated by Rei was unheard of. Almost. Gently prying his hand away, Kazuki was careful to keep his voice balanced, not wanting to startle him with too much volume ‘or emotion for that matter’. “You’re running a fever, Rei. It feels pretty bad… you are sick, aren’t you?” “Might be.” “Might?” Despite the effort to keep his voice calm, the incredulous nature of the statement crept up in Kazuki’s retort, but he bit back any further comments when Rei flinched at the tone change. Yes, flinched.  “Sorry. I’m not mad, okay? I just… I need you to tell me how bad it is so I can help you, okay?”

“Okay.” Progress, an affirmative response. Not denying the sickness. This is progress. “Can you tell me what feels icky right now?” “Icky?” “Shut up, you- you know what I mean. We know you have a fever, I’ll get a thermometer to be sure, but given the heat, we’ll be lucky if it’s low-grade. Is there anything els-” “hH’nNXGT-!uhhh hIHH-! ihh’DTNNGT-! Hehh’nnngxxt-!shuhhh”  “So sneezing too. And you were coughing earlier, so that’s probably not gone?”

Rei responds, but it’s barely audible, seemingly unintentional, as he clears his throat and gives it another try. “It’s not that bad.” “But you do have a cough.” “I guess.” “You gue-” Kazuki studies himself with a sigh, running a hand down his face, before clearing his throat softly and starting again. Man, it was harder to hold back the snark then he thought. “Alright, I can work with this. I’m going to get the thermometer, you are going to let me take your temperature, and then we can figure out what to do from there. I’m also going to give you some meds, and you are going to take them.” ‘If we even have any’ He added to himself, turning to the kitchen to locate the cold supplies. He let out a silent prayer that they had at least some cough drops to soothe Rei’s throat as he heard the man burst into another harsh cough behind him. It was rough, deep, wet, and with a wheezing sound to it that was more than Kazuki could stand to listen to. He finds the drawer, pulling it open to reveal a pack of tissues, a stack of napkins, a thermometer, and a handful of cough drops ‘thank god’. Making his way back over to Rei, Kazuki pauses at the table, pretending to read the papers he had left there last night, giving Rei a bit of space as the man gasps desperately and ducks into his wrist. “Heh’nngtt-! Kk’nnggtt-! H’ddtshh’uee-!”  The last one didn’t go down so easily, refusing to be swallowed into oblivion, leaving Rei a bit redder then he was a second ago, and sniffling into a handful of tissues. He gives another soft blow, but this time it’s not out of embarrassment, as evident by the utter lack of airflow through his nose as he attempts to give another heady sniff. 

“Bless you, Rei. I found a few cough drops, but I wanna check your fever before I give you any, so open up, stick this under your tongue, and keep it there till it beeps.”

“I know how a thermometer works.” “With you I can never be sure. Now open up, there you go, and- yep just like that, now keep it there. I mean it, don’t you dare take it out before it beeps.” Rei rolls his eyes, bringing up a hand to rub at his nose. His twitching nose. ‘Oh for shit’s sake’.  “Don’t you dare sneeze, you hear me?”

The nod he receives is vastly undercut by the desperation dancing through Rei’s eyes as he pinches his nose shut. It doesn’t seem to help as much as he wanted though, as a hitching breath hisses out between his teeth. “hehhH-! Hahh… hhHDT- uhhhh…. hiHh-!” Credit where credit’s due, he was holding out valiantly considering the frequency of the breaths and the frantic nature of his nose, vibrating against his fingers. The thermometer sounds with a loud ‘BEEEEP’ that startles both of them.

Kazuki pulls it out, and checks the numbers. 39.5°C ‘oh shit’. Not bad enough for a hospital, but close enough to cause his heart to race, mind flooding with panic. If Rei faints, could he carry him? What about if his brain boils, that was a thing Kazuki had read could happen if you had too high of a fever. Granted it was on a social media site, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true. You can’t just dismiss it, and what if the fever keeps climbing, would Rei even let him bring him to a hospital? For that matter, is he in any state to put up a fight? Kazuki breaks free of his thoughts long enough to cast a glance back over at Rei and finds him- “hHh-! ehHH!uhhhhh…. hehhhH-! hhHH-”  “Oh god Rei, I meant don’t sneeze when it’s in your mouth, you can sneeze now!”

“Okaahhhh! hH’NNGT-! DTNNGXTT-! hEH’NXXGT-! I cahhh- can’t… I can’t ihhhht tick- ticklheHH!”  Kazuki winces at every desperately contained outburst, before finally deciding enough is enough, and pulling Rei’s hands down. Confused eyes met his, desperation shining in them as his breath catches once more, only barely managing to stall it.

“Whhhaahh! What are you doohhing, let go, I nehehhh- need to sneeze!”  There’s more emotion in his voice then Kazuki had ever heard before, but he guesses it’s hard to keep a tone of unphased annoyance when your breath is hitching so wildly.

“I know, but if you keep stifling them like that you’re gonna blow a fuse, and I don’t need you bleeding on top of this sickness, the couch is red, but blood will still leave a stain for me to clean.” Softening his tone, Kazuki locks his eyes with Rei’s again, letting the care he feels seep into them more than he’d normally allow. “It’s just me. You can let them go, I don’t mind. I promise, you’re safe here.” Even if he wants to protest further, his nose has had enough of being denied, and Rei gives Kazuki an unreadable look before lunging as far away from him as he can manage for the outburst.

“HH’ZZSCHH’OO-! heHH! EHKSSHHH’OO-! RSHHH’OO-! hAH’TSHHH’OOO-! eehhh’hehh’MMPFSSH’OO! hhH’AHHSHH’OO-!” They’re itchy, harsh, and seem to scrape against his throat with every blast, but they also sound like the first real relief he’s had from this itch all day. Rei seems to agree, letting out an itchy, but deeply relieved sigh as the tickle finally backs off enough to let him catch his breath. He sniffles wetly, and then again, managing a weak, “My hands Kazuki.”  Kazuki flushes, seeming only now to realize the grasp he still held on Rei’s arms, letting go with a sheepish grin.

“Sorry, right. Was a little preoccupied watching the show.” It’s Rei’s turn to flush at that, bringing tissues to his nose only partially out of necessity. However, no fear flashes through his eyes this time. ‘Maybe that’s progress’. Kazuki figures, a real smile starting to creep over his face at the thought of Rei finally starting to open up. It’s quickly crushed when the man slumps against him, eyes fluttering shut, heat practically melting into Kazuki’s skin even through the layers of clothing. Just like that, he’s reminded exactly how serious this situation is, and how much worse it could get if he doesn’t think fast. “Hey, Rei, keep your eyes open, okay? I need you to stay awake, I know I’m strong, but carrying you is a harsh no from me, bud.” He gets a low growl in response, but it’s better than nothing. Rei manages to sit up enough to meet his eyes, and he can see the gloss over them. Kazuki wonders if he can even tell what’s going on, and nearly faints when Rei grabs his hand, and presses it back to his forehead again like before. “Feels nice.” The statement is punctuated with a sharp shiver, Rei’s whole body seeming to tremble as he curls deeper into himself, glassy eyes starting to water. Kazuki has seen a lot of terrifying things in his lifetime, and more heartbreak than he was due. But the look in Rei’s eyes, the way he trembles as he attempts to curl into himself, the desperate vulnerability of the scene, it’s enough to chill him to the bone. “Okay, I need you to try to stand up, we’re going to the bathroom. We need to get your fever down. Uh- do you have a swimsuit in your room?” Rei gives him a confused look, but nods weakly, managing to pull himself into a standing position, before hunching over with another set of throat-scraping coughs. The wheeze in his lungs is back, each breath sounding more and more like whistling, and Katsuki takes a second to study his own breathing. Gently, he coaxes Rei to lean against him, draping his arm around his back. They slowly make their way over to the bathroom, where Kazuki sits Rei down on the floor next to the tub, and turns the water on. After making sure it was a nice cool temperature, he rushes up to Rei’s room. Thankfully for him, despite being a mess, his clothes are all kept fairly in one spot, and he finds the swimsuit fast. Making his way back downstairs, Kazuki takes a beat to himself, letting the fear wash over him. While he doesn’t consider himself a particularly weak person, Rei far outmatches him in strength. The man seems to have it all together on the job, no fear, no emotions, just skill and undeniable talent. He gets in, does what needs doing, and goes home. Many words come to mind when thinking of Rei, but not a single one was ‘scared’. Seeing the fear in Rei’s eyes was haunting, and every time Kazuki blinked, those eyes stared back at him. Ones full of imaginable terror at the thought of being perceived as sick. At being seen out of control of his own body. Kazuki remembers something Rei offhandedly mentioned once about his ‘Boss’, saying that “weakness was not tolerated. Not of any kind. Punishments for such flaws were… harsh.” He shudders to think what kind of punishment could instil that kind of blind terror into a man like Rei. Well, never again. It doesn’t matter what happened back then, he’s here now, and no one will ever cause that kind of fear in Rei again. Not ever.  Getting back to the bathroom, he pales at the sight of Rei, fully stretched out on the floor, but some colour returns when the man lets out a rough cough, bringing his hand to his face. With a strained sigh, Kazuki turns the faucet off, letting his hand dip into the cool water, before bringing it up to Rei’s forehead again. 

Rei leans into the touch, letting out a weak moan as the cool relief washes over him. Kazuki helps him stand, handing him the suit.

“Put this on, I’ll look away.” He turns towards the wall, only looking back briefly when Rei lets out a harsh “hEHH’NGXXT-!uhhh” Presenting his shoulder for him to lean against as he changes into the suit. Once he’s changed, Kazuki guides him gently into the water, wincing at the way he hisses at the dramatic change in temperature. “I know, I know, but it’s gonna feel much better, I promise.” His voice is soft, almost calm, but his heart is racing. It doesn’t help that Rei starts shaking again, this time violently enough to splash the water around his hands as they rub his arms. Time seems to slow to a crawl as Kazuki kneels beside the tub, knuckles white as he grips the edge. He’s not used to feeling so helpless, but watching Rei tremble, unable to do anything but watch… it’s killing him. Eventually he can’t take it anymore, and he reaches his hand out to Rei’s head, gently running his fingers through his hair. Rei at first freezes, seemingly fighting every instinct to pull away, before slowly allowing his shoulders to relax a bit, a deep sigh escaping his irritated lungs. Kazuki takes this chance, slipping into the tub behind him, with more than enough room for Rei to move away if it’s too much. What he doesn’t expect, however, is Rei leaning back into him, resting his head, and letting his eyes drift close. The trembling isn’t gone, but it’s a lot more muted, and slowing by the minute.  “Hehh-!”  Kazuki watches as Rei’s nose twitches, a ticklish breath escaping, before he ducks forward with a harsh stifle. “hH’nNGXT’shh-!”  It seems to soak up all the strength he has left, as he weakly manages to raise his hand to pinch his nose shut for it, not letting go once it’s done. The desperate quality of the next breath he takes suggests there are more fighting to come.  Kazuki reaches over beside the tub to where he’d left a box of tissues earlier, and pulls a handful out, pressing them to Rei’s nose. With them, he gently pries Rei’s fingers away, eliciting a low growl in response, desperation prickling in his eyes. “It’s okay, I’ve got you. You can let go, you’re safe with me. I promise, okay? Plus all your stifling is giving me a headache, so I can’t even imagine how bad it must be for you.” He seems to hit home with that one, with Rei letting out a low groan, as if just the reminder of his head was enough to reignite the pain. Kazuki winces a little, that wasn’t the intention, but he’ll do whatever it takes to get Rei to stop trying to implode. “hH’ZSSCHH’OO-! eHH’SSHH’OOO-! hh’RUSHH’ooo! mMMPFFSHH’ooo-!”   ‘It’s probably a good thing he’s too out of it to realize what actually just happened, he’d probably be mortified sneezing into my hand like that’ Kazuki recons when Rei lets himself finally blow his nose, desperate and harsh, but with a sigh afterwards that signifies it was also relieving. “I’m sorry-” Rei starts, out of it enough to not feel actively embarrassed, but apparently still with enough cognizance to realize what happened. Kazuki cuts him off with a shrug, offering another gentle- “I’ve got you, don’t worry about it.” Silence fills the air as Kazuki tosses the tissues, and Rei leans his head back against his shoulder again, this time letting his head turn towards Kazuki’s neck, eyes completely shut.

“Is this okay?”  Kazuki asks softly, and Rei gives a hum in response, leaning deeper into his touch as Kazuki pets his hair some more, letting a smile slip out when he hums again, his posture finally relaxing enough to sink deeper into the water. Kazuki cradles his head, making sure to keep it above the water, but allowing them both to submerge a little more in the cooling touch. 

~~~~~~~

He’s not sure how long they stay like that, but Rei slips into a peaceful sleep, and eventually the fever breaks, leaving them both exhausted and soaked. Once he wakes, Kazuki gets Rei out of the tub, helping him dry off before grabbing a towel for himself, and helping Rei into the change of clothes he had brought down. He turns away respectfully when it comes time to change out of the swimsuit, but once again lets Rei lean against him. Soon he’s fully changed, and Kazuki leads him back to the couch and lays him down, before heading upstairs to change himself. Once he gets back downstairs, he finds Rei dead asleep, stuffed up snoring filling the apartment. Kazuki hums out a small chuckle, laying a blanket over him, and allowing himself a moment to just watch him sleep. He looks so peaceful, no indication that mere hours prior he was nearly on death's door. With a final look, Kazuki heads back upstairs, checking his phone to see that Kyu responded to the text he sent earlier. KAZ: r is sick, might have to cancel job, sorry 4 last minute notice KYU: It’s alright. Don’t make a habit of it though. KAZ: thx kyu KYU: Take care of him, alright? KAZ: already on it KYU: I knew you would be. KAZ: but i dont think we have cold meds, could u drop smthn off 2morrow? –Unread messages– KYU: I’ll put something together, but I’m leaving it outside the door. You’re going to catch this, but I’d prefer to stay healthy.  He lets out a soft laugh, Kyu was absolutely right. He was absolutely going to catch this. Rei also may be out of the woods for now, but it’s only day two, there’s no way this bug is going away that fast. But somehow, none of those things seem to matter. He’s gonna take care of his buddy, no matter what. He made a promise, Rei will be safe with him, and he always keeps his word. 

[masterwords]

rest

Summary: A virus sweeps through the Morgan-Hotchner household.

Pairing: Hotch/Morgan

Words: 2.4k

Warnings: illness, snot, fevers, meds...but soft and fluffy.

Notes: This is fluff. Just some sickfic fluff set in the Chicago semi-retirement years. How each member of the household deals with it when they get the cold that's going around. All because I wanted to write about Hotch and Clooney, old men napping together. Clooney is the goodest boy and ageless, really. I've had this in my WIP folder forever and it's one of those not getting any better or any more of a plot scenario so...I cleaned it up and now I give it to you. Making room for some new WIPs!

** The Chicago Times Masterlist **

**

The first sneeze of the season was always a benchmark.

In Spring, it let them know the pollen was on the move and that the trees were calling to the bees to do their thing. Derek would pull out the Claritin first, choosing not to even mess with the itchy eyes one moment. Hotch, on the other hand, would wait. His system was already inundated by pills of varying shapes and sizes, medications that ranged from benign to downright sinister, so a stuffy nose and some dry itchy eyes were not the end of the world.

Virginia hadn't ever treated him too badly, but he was convinced that Chicago meant him harm. Still, he persisted with a handkerchief stuffed into his pocket and saline drops for his dry eyes. He could wear his glasses now without fear of ridicule...it was almost expected of a man in his position. They may have clashed with his suit and tie, but they were the perfect accessory for his sweaters and khakis.

So, the first sneeze of Spring didn't worry him much.

The first sneeze of Autumn, however, set off the alarm bells. It was almost always Jack first with Derek hot on his heels. Hotch and Hank were sitting ducks, waiting for whatever germs the two of them brought home to fully culture inside their walls.

“Already?” Hotch asked, watching Derek rummage through the medicine cabinet for that damn box of DayQuil he knew was in there. “It's awfully early in the school year for this.”

“Tell that to my students. Jackson was puking in the trash can at football practice last night, Burkhardt was spitting loogies all over the damn field and where the fuck is my DayQuil?”

Hotch didn't even look up from the stack of papers he was grading. “Top shelf, right. Behind the contact solution.” His classes didn't start until 11, he really didn't even need to be up yet. Derek, on the other hand, should have been out the door a half hour ago and was certainly going to be late.

“It's not there.”

Hotch hummed. “Check under the sink, maybe you need to open a new package.”

Sick days were a menace at best. Everyone was grouchy, not a kind word in sight. Jack trudged around the house with kleenex shoved up his nose like walrus tusks and insisted on staying home while simultaneously refusing to actually rest. A nap was out of the question, which was a cause for more than one argument when Hotch demanded to know why he wouldn't nap when he was sick but he was nearly impossible to get out of bed in the mornings. Tensions ran high. To top it all off, his kleenex never quite seemed to make it to a trash can and Hotch found himself walking around picking up wads of the stuff from every surface of the whole house, scarcely wanting to imagine the state of the kid's room. That task he made Jack deal with on his own. He had his limits.

Derek was terrible at being sick. The minute he had a sniffle, he was grouchy. Angry at his body's betrayal. “Why do I workout so much, huh? Drinkin' those nasty green smoothies every damn day and for what? Huh?” Punctuate that with a cough or a sneeze and he was a mess. Hotch would only find it in him to smile, to press the back of his hand to Derek's fevered forehead and tell him to sleep it off.

“You always fight it off faster when you sleep,” Hotch said, guiding him toward the bed. “Take the day off.”

“I can't.” Cough, cough, wheeze. “We've got varsity tryouts today. I got some real boneheads thinkin' they're gonna make it and that damn assistant coach they gave me this year is a bleeding heart.” Sneeze. “He'll tell 'em all they got the job just to avoid the talk.”

Hotch had to smile at that. Derek had been complaining about his assistant coach since the summer, but he was a nepotism hire so Hotch understood and there wasn't anything he could do short of taking on twice the work himself so he could save himself the trouble on the back end. Unfortunately that meant going to work sick, pumping himself full of Sudafed and DayQuil at what he deemed to be safe intervals though Hotch had other opinions on the matter.

“Go lie down, I'll make you some tea. At least go in late. Take a half day.”

Thoughtfully, Derek considered the option. He was already late. Tryouts weren't until 4 anyway. “Yeah. Okay. Yeah...good idea.” He slept all day, right on through the tryouts, and didn't have enough energy to be upset about that when he finally did wake. Hotch stuffed him full of tea with honey, vitamins, extra water and a few more kisses right to the top of his head before leaving him to sleep.

He slept on the couch that night, his final attempt to stave off the germs. Clooney slept behind his knees, curled up in a ball there.

It only took a few days before Derek and Jack were on the mend, were carrying around the last of the dry coughs and stuffy sinuses. They would wake up in the morning and hack hack hack, then be fine by the time their showers were over.

Being the newest kid on the block, it only took a few days to take Hank the Tank down entirely. After that, Hotch knew it was only a matter of time before he followed suit. His immune system would fight the longest and crash the hardest. If you looked at most of the scattered pill bottles in their medicine cabinet, you would see plenty that read with simple, off-putting language like do not consume with alcohol, or may cause drowsiness, but then you would stumble on that token few that claimed that they might make it harder to fight off infections. He did a damn good job of not getting them in the first place, at least until now...until Hank. But he couldn't resist the little guy and his weepy eyes and snotty nose, his fevered skin and damp curls. Hank would hold his arms out and beg to be held by Hotch and Hotch alone, and what could he do but say yes and scoop him up? How do you tell a squishy little two-year-old no when all they want is a hug (and to rub their snot all over you)?

“You're toast,” Derek muttered, breezing through the room to try and find his slacks. The nice ones. He had meetings all morning with athletic scouts, setting up dates and times for them to come and check out his players. “You know that right?”

Hotch nodded and pressed his cheek into Hank's curls, closing his eyes. He was well aware that he was absolutely in for it. Didn't stop him from kissing Hank's forehead and humming little songs to him while the kid drooled all over his t-shirt.

Waking at 2am with the chills wasn't exactly out of place, except when he was buried beneath three blankets already. He pushed further beneath the covers and huddled there, basking in Derek's warmth, until he fell back asleep.

Waking at 7am dizzy, unable to focus his eyes...that one was a little more concerning. Swiping one hand over the nightstand, he found his glasses and that helped tremendously with one of the problems. It did nothing to ease the swaying dizzy feeling as he sat himself up, but at least he could see. “Derek?” he asked, pawing at the bed behind him until he touched the lump of blankets that he presumed was his lover. “Derek?”

“Mmmfff...” Derek grumbled, his face deep in a pillow. “Mmf?”

“I need your help, please.”

He'd gotten good at that, recently. Asking for help. One of the stipulations, agreed upon up front, like forging a treaty between warring villages. Derek wouldn't put up with him collapsing, excusing himself to do so, not again. No more avoidable scares. And Derek, to his credit, took every plea for help with alacrity. He never so much as batted an eyelash at it, he would drop everything to come and he always did so with a brightness that made Hotch feel at ease no matter what situation he found himself in.

This morning was no different. The minute he said the word help, Derek was sitting upright rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “What's up baby?”

“I need to use the bathroom,” Hotch started, a little sheepishly. “But I'm too dizzy to stand.”

“Hank the Tank's cooties got you, huh?”

“Looks like it.”

With Hotch settled against his side, hand possessive and firm against his hip, Derek walked them to the bathroom. He nudged Clooney's sleeping form out of the way and flipped on the light. The bathroom was always warmer than the bedroom, a fact that was not lost on Clooney and his old bones. By the time Hotch was leaning against the sink, staring into his pale and drawn features reflected back at him, he wasn't feeling quite so bad. The dizzy feeling had all but passed.

“Thank you,” he whispered, and Derek took that as his cue to leave him to his business. Clooney had taken up residence on the bed in the warmth they'd vacated, he noted with some sourness, when he exited the bathroom. Hotch wouldn't mind. He'd call in sick and spend the day in bed with the dog now that he was the only one sick in the house. Everyone else would leave, let them to their peace and quiet. Two old men who genuinely adored hearing the creaks of a settling foundation over loudly talking voices. The hum of a refrigerator over music. The whistle of wind through their sparsely treed yard over the television. They love their family, but in times like this, quiet was the best medicine. Hotch was willing to ask for help, but he still wanted to be by himself when he didn't feel well.

“You call in?” Derek asked, bringing Hotch tea in bed. Hotch nodded and shifted his hips, trying to get comfortable around the deeply settled ache in his joints. He was radiating heat. Derek had already taken his temperature once, not alarmingly high yet but he'd take it again when he came home from work...or maybe he'd send his mother over to check on him in a few hours. She would have Hank for the day anyway.

“Go to work, I'll be fine.”

Clooney was lying beside him, the length of his back firm against the length of Hotch's side. Pressed in heavy. Hotch let one hand rest on Clooney's chest, against his ribs, delighting in the gentle rise and fall of the sleeping animal's breath.

“Your nurse is sleeping on the job.”

“He does that.” Hotch didn't cough, and he didn't sneeze. The cold settled deep into his sinuses and his chest, but only made everything ache and feel tight. Like he was pulling in on himself and expanding to his limits all at the same time. His skin hurt and his eyebrows hurt and his head hurt. More or less, everything hurt. It made his ears get stuffy, for a few days his hearing would be shot.

But there was no snot, and he considered that a win.

There was a time in his life when he would have pushed through, gone to work, pretended he was okay. He'd moved through one of the worst cases of his life feeling as bad as this once upon a time. He'd come face to face with George Foyet, handed him his glasses and told him that they'd catch The Reaper...he'd hung up on the man in his own hotel room...all with a fever high enough to warrant medical attention, and he'd watched Derek hold up the bullet intended for his head while that fever broke and left him chilled to the bone and hoping no one could tell he was sweating it out. Of course, Derek knew, had confronted him after, a fact that later led to their current ask for help agreement. Well, one of many facts. His life was a list of such occasions, such learning experiences.

You can teach an old dog new tricks, he thought hazily, his eyes heavy and unfocused as Derek kissed him on the forehead and told him he'd see him later. Maybe, maybe not. He intended to sleep well into the next century, the way he felt right then. Tired didn't even begin to cover it, and he dozed off thinking of every word in every language he knew that could account for how tired he was. None came close. Probably, he thought as he lost his battle with conscious thought, there was a phrase in German that would perfectly sum it up. Something about being so tired your bones ached, that would do.

He wouldn't remember that when waking. A pity, too.

Fran delivered chicken soup to him, secret Morgan family recipe that she claimed could kick any virus' patootie, and kept an eye on him while she cleaned up their house. It didn't really need much, they kept things tidy, but they didn't get into all of the cracks and crevices. She could do that to keep herself occupied while she waited for Derek to return home. Hotch and Hank slept soundly, flanking Clooney, all afternoon and well into the evening without stirring. It was Hank that woke first, hungry and weepy. His cold was mostly gone but he was crying a lot more than usual, and exhausted.

Hotch only woke once to sit up, wonder at the fuzzy face of the clock, trying to reason out the numbers that blurred one into the other. Deciding it wasn't of any real importance because he didn't plan to do anything other than roll over, he adjusted himself to the other hip, curled around Clooney, and went back to sleep.

“You have a lovely family,” Fran said, pulling Derek in for a hug before leaving for the night. “I adore each of you very much. But if I get sick...”

“You're sending me the bill. Got it.”

She patted him on the cheek and smiled up at him. “Good boy. I love you dear.”

“Love you too, moms.”

[mistralxsoul]

Flynn had woken up before him, but he hadn't moved yet. Actually, it seemed like he'd been watching Yuri, given that he was facing him and had his eyes open when Yuri woke up... but Yuri only laid there blinking back slowly. He was still too tired to even feel embarrassed about the possibility, hardly even awake. He sighed and closed his eyes again for a few seconds, blinking them back open.

Normally he could get a good idea of what was on Flynn's mind, but his face seemed mostly peacefully blank. Like he really had nothing on his mind outside of what was in front of him. For Yuri, too, it wasn't like they'd never woken up next to each other, but it did feel... different this morning after he'd finally given Flynn that ring. Maybe it was because Flynn was no longer just... the person he was in love with, but the person who would be legally recognized as his partner. This kind of thing would just normal from now on.

And he liked seeing Flynn in the morning, still tired and not fully awake yet either. There was the lively, active Flynn he crossed swords with, and... tired, waking up, peaceful Flynn. There was last night, too, where he'd been all smiles and laughter until he calmed down enough to just be content with holding Yuri. Actually, Yuri was surprised he'd managed to sleep at all with how excited he was. It was... genuinely adorable though and absolutely had Yuri's heart swell with happiness.

After he felt words coming back to him, he slid over closer to Flynn. "So how is engaged life?" It hadn't even been a full day - maybe half of one at best, but it was a lighthearted joke. He might even go back to sleep for a while, but he may as well say something and not just return to sleep in total silence.

It took a lot for Flynn to consider staying in bed for once. Usually he was out of bed to begin his morning routine the second his eyes opened. His workload asked for nothing less that that. The only times Flynn would ever consider sleeping in a bit longer was when he was sick (...or… at least 60% of the time. He would never tell Yuri about the few times he had still forced himself to work with a particularly high fever) or when Yuri clung to him and refused to let him out of bed. 

This morning, however, Flynn decided that he could afford to sleep in for once. After all, he wanted to bask in the feeling of being a newly engaged man with the one sound asleep beside him. Truly, he was the luckiest man in the world, he thought, as he reached over to gently brush some of Yuri’s hair from his face. 

He always did like to watch Yuri sleep. It was one of the few times that Flynn actually got to see Yuri truly at peace and it was one of the things Flynn missed most when he and Yuri stopped sharing a bed when they were younger. And one of the things he gladly welcomed back when they had officially become a couple. 

Flynn wasn’t sure how long he laid there, watching Yuri sleep but after some time passed, he watched as Yuri began to stir and return to the land of the living. He closed his eyes again for a few second before opening them again as he tried to blink the sleep away. It was so endearing that Flynn couldn’t help but lean over to press a gentle kiss against his forehead, whispering “Good Morning, beautiful…” against his skin. 

He smiled when Yuri pressed closer, happily readjusting his position so Yuri could be held more comfortably in his arms. Then he nuzzles his face into the man’s hair, tangled by sleep but still soft and beautiful as ever. 

“Mm… Engaged life is going well.” He answered, voice thick with sleep as he gently rubbed at Yuri’s back. His bed had never felt more comfortable. Who knew all he had to do was have Yuri in his bed in order to make his own bed the most tempting thing in the entire world? 

“I got to wake up to the most beautiful sight in the world and then realize that I’m going to have the pleasure of seeing that for the rest of my life. I wish you could see it. It’s absolutely breathtaking.” His voice was teasing as he leaned down to give the other a quick kiss. 

As awkward as the positioning was, it still left Flynn feeling warm and comfortable as he held Yuri close to his chest. It was warm. It was fuzzy. It was normal. And it was going to be theirs for the rest of their lives.

[inside-the-tardis]

Time Jumps

From an emotional standpoint, as far as I recall and wish to document, there has been discord. Romantic relationship is restricting, it's selfish and possessive and has created more bad energy for me than good. Even the energy we surrounded ourselves with were always shadowed. True reconciliation happens in isolation together. Other events were merely for show and full of strife eye contact. The hobbies and habits we bonded over were of vice and sin. But in our hearts we were children, trying each best new thing. My favourtie of course was the motorbike, but there were many other things to admire. I must reiterate my toxic trait of not letting go and fear of being alone & insufferable.

and with you, it has always been a state of flux. A push or a pull. A beginning with many delays and hardships. But as I struggled to piece together much of what happened when we last met (two years this Hallows eve) as I know you have too. But I like to think that secretly on some days I have surprised yo u too and instead of only asking from you, I have also given you love and compassion, and a lot of good things to remember me by, though now I can only remember the sorrow and sadmoments. I still think of you fondly and reminicese. I hope your life is full, and I admire your companionship as a soul on a journey but you couldn't help churn my soul. I was still reeling from the loss of a grieved one when I met someone else and I went in with all my pre conceievd notions. It should have been differnt as life warned me multiple times that it was different now, but we take life as it comes, laid-back and easy, one thing I will not regret, my cluelessness and maybe ignorance? It would not have helped make me that girl I am today. I needed closure however, and his soul and God have always given me in kind. I never could forget and I never will. What happened after was a year long? or was it longer I forget now delusionship, where I coped with loss and gave a brief insight into my terrible psyche. Left loose, it was dangerous to even get drunk. The horrors of being perceievd for who you really are. But I persevered adn I'm glad I did. Many substances came in and paved the way and life was alright, it was easy and it held its own hardships. I may have come on too strongly and applied home rules for an away game. I had no business doing that. The delusionship ended, I had brief moments of clarity and conscious thought, but the aftermath seeped into my life like a wet dirty rug. My mindset at any point was not fruitful or compliant. I came out of the fever dream hungry, weak, maybe knowing better, with a lot of renewed heartache and so much stuff to throw away. Also had different ideas about my pre notions, which became neo notions but were still quite toxic.

Paranoia and anxiey also became normal. I had bursts of energy and productivity but only timed properly so to make no difference to my actual lifestyle. I was dealing with loss of friends, loss of family, loss of true connection, loss of home, loss of lovers and loss of time.

Today , I'm still dealing with that loss. I have grown around it but it still very much lives inside me. I have weird ways of dealing with trauma. I starve myself, I isolate myself, get copiusly drunk and high. Will stay unmoved for days, rot in bed, eat nothing, drink nothing, be a degenerate fiend. Tonight I rise from the filth. I sign out of Spotify and Amazon Prime, and I recognize my own insufferability and others' shortcomings too. I live and let live, in the true sense, and I don't allowthe past to bog me down. I dont believe in looking behind because that is how you crash into things. A forward approach starting today from this moment to always make it a point to look towards the future or working in the present. Working towards your hobbies, your needs and your aesthetics. All of which should be fulfilled. Nothing less shall suffice.

[liopleurodean]

The Road So Far: Season 8

Well. Halfway done. Officially, as of 8x15 Man's Best Friend With Benefits (the 164th episode of the 327-episode series).

If you're confused, this is my recap/thoughts on season 8 of Supernatural. You can find my other season recaps and episode notes in the "ashla chick flick moments" tag.

This season was all over the place. I find that I like Sam less and less as the series goes on (though I am chronic Deangirl). I could've maybe understood giving up on Dean after a while, but the fact that he didn't even try in the first place and also ditched Kevin was a jerk move.

Garth was kind of annoying this season, and I don't mean in his normal, lovable way. Taking Bobby's place is fine, but you can't just replace a person. The hunting world needed a new researcher/dispatcher, but they didn't need a new Bobby.

Charlie, however, was just as amazing as ever. She got some more backstory revealed, and her sibling relationship with Dean was a joy to watch (I don't think I've seen Dean have that much fun since season 4 with Cas. Take that how you will.)

We met multiple new characters, like Benny, Abbadon, and Naomi, and I think that all of them got mixed reviews. Abbadon is going to be a fun villain, I think, because she's just so brutal and terrifying. She reminds me of Azazel (as she should) and I can't wait to see her story play out. Naomi is a character you can't help but hate. The whole situation is complicated, but what she did to Cas and the other angels is unacceptable. However, I do think she could've been a valuable ally against Metatron had she survived. Benny was an interesting addition. Obviously I don't know everything that happened in Purgatory, but Dean and Benny's bond seemed a little out of character for Dean. Then again, he was stuck in nightmareland and had just lost his brother and best friend, so he was probably willing to latch on to anyone. Honestly, I just don't know how to feel about Benny. Ultimately, he always pulled through and I'm glad he was there for Dean, but it just felt a little weird.

I mentioned Metatron, and I've gotta say, he was not what I was expecting. Although, I'm not really sure what it was exactly that I was expecting.

If I've got my timeline right (I probably don't) season 9 starts the whole Mark of Cain storyline to stop Abbadon, and I presume Metatron will be involved earlier in the season (a la season 6 Soulless!Sam then Eve?) I took a glance at some of the episode titles/descriptions in season 9, and it looks like a wild ride from start to finish.

I'd say season 8 is somewhere in the middle of the ranking, maybe a little on the high end. There were some great episodes: 8x08 Hunteri Heroici, 8x09 Citizen Fang, 8x11 LARP and the Real Girl, 8x12 As Time Goes By, 8x17 Goodbye Stranger, and 8x20 Pac-Man Fever are all great episodes. I think normally season finales rank well on these lists, but the season 8 finale felt a little weird to me. It was strangely drawn out and kind of unsatisfying. Obviously the network was setting up for another season, but it didn't really feel like the end of a season at all. Anyway, my favorite episode was probably either 8x11 LARP and the Real Girl or 8x20 Pac-Man Fever. Charlie is just one of my favorite characters, and she and Dean always play off of each other so well.

Speaking of Dean, he was in ultimate Protective Parent Mode™ this season. With Sam and the trials, and Kevin being neglected, and Charlie's rough past, as well as others like Krissy Chambers and her friends, Dean had plenty of opportunity to let his soft side show. Not to mention, the major case of nesting at the bunker! Germophobe Dean my beloved <3. Knowing what I do about the next two seasons, makes me think that this is almost a peace offering ahead of what's to come for Dean's character.

I don't really have anything good to say about Sam right now, so I won't say much, but I do think the whole "purity" storyline is interesting. None of our main characters are completely "pure," so Sam's obsession seems a little unfounded. It was motivation, though, and it kept him going, so it was a net good, I guess.

I really want to finish season 9, and that's the plan. I'd like to also get through season 10 before the end of summer, but I really don't see that happening. There'll be a 2-3 week dead zone where I won't be watching anything, which is not great for my watch schedule. I'm also moving and losing Netflix in early-mid August, so I'm not sure how I'll watch the show after that (the DVD boxed set is $120-ish, and that's actually a bargain. I'm screwed). I do plan to finish this series! Both watching and chronicling. I'm just not sure of logistics yet. I really want to see Baby, I haven't even met Jack, and I know that my blorbo Adam comes back! Now is not the time to quit! I'll start season 9 soon. Catch you on the flip side, and Carry On!

[violettelueur]

— ITADORI YUJI + GOJO SATORU + RYOMEN SUKUNA + NANAMI KENTO || THEIR S/O TURNING INTO BABIES/TODDLERS

↳ featuring : itadori yuji + gojo satoru + ryomen sukuna + nanami kento from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : grammar issues

↳ form : headcanons

↳ published : 03 april

↳ pronouns : non specified in headcanon

↳ request : Hi! May I request a headcanon just like the previous one you did with the s/o turning into a child but with Gojo, Itadori, Sukuna and Nanami? Thank you, I'm always looking forward to your works and love them very much!!!

↳ barista’s notes : i am so sad that i didn’t enjoy jujutsu kaisen friday...it feels really weird to not watch an episode ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ but update on my life, on genshin impact i am on AR 39 since i finished my assession thingy and i am plannning to spend a lot on money on small business and skincare because it’s my two week holiday (if i do not become stingy because i am with money - call me MeiMei) and i can’t shop physically because of COVID....other than that, i hope you enjoy your cup of classic black coffee and come back soon ╲ʕ·ᴥ·　╲ʔ

Itadori would be most surprised out of everyone when he finds out that you have turned into a child. For example, he would wake up and would instantly fall off his bed once he finds a toddler in his presence.

The first person he will go to is Fushiguro because ‘best friends for life I say’ and to be honest, you will probably cry/become nervous the second you see him because he has an annoyed look on his face leading you to hide under the blanket.

Itadori will panic and pull you into his arms with the blanket over because you are just scared of his friend and Fushiguro will be confused since you were friends with him after all.

You will have the brightest smile when you are with Itadori and you love it when he would raise you up in the air because it seems like you are flying.

When Itadori runs, you will giggle so much because it’s like being in a race car because of how fast he goes and the first years will wonder why you are not scared one bit.

I feel like you are comfortable with other people carrying you like even Gojo can, but when you want to go to Itadori...they better pass you on to him.

You and Itadori will always high-five each other just to make you happy because you would always raise your hand to him.

What Itadori finds really adorable is when you pick up a basketball because it looks really big compared to your toddler size and it is extra adorable when you try to throw it into the hoop with a little jump to copy him...like it just doesn’t reach.

This is when he would carry you up in the air and allow you to place the ball into the hoop because he really loves it when you cheer brightly.

When you run around, expect either Itadori to run slower because it seems like you are having so much fun or him to scoop you up into his arms because he is just really fast.

If Sukuna appears on his cheek, you would either slap it because you think it’s weird or just stare because it’s something you don’t see every day.

Itadori will have to force himself to watch cartoons with you because that is the only thing you would watch rather than you regular anime/movie nights that you would have with him.

After the whole cursed technique has been reversed, you would have no recollection of what just happened for the past 24 hours leading Itadori to explain - but I feel like he is the type to rather giggle in the middle of his explanation leading you to ask Fushiguro and Kugsaki in the end.

When you have turned into a toddler, Gojo will have no clue on what to do or say - even though he technically raised Fushiguro, doesn’t mean he has parental skills...he knows how to financially support someone.

In the beginning, he would be looking at you with such endearment because of how adorable you look and will absolutely take thousands of photos of you.

However, it seemed like you somehow retained your personality because the second he takes the 1000th photo, you would smack the phone out of his hands, surprising him completely.

You seem to be quite a calm child since you don’t really refuse to let him carry you, you just let him while he parades you around the school to show you off.

You will call him ‘Mr’ - don’t know why...maybe to tease him.

Gojo is the type to spin you around and twirl you like a princess because you are and forever will be to him - he sort of begins to notice your quite a quiet child.

The first years would be really shocked at your new appearance, especially Fushiguro since you did raise him...now it’s kind of his turn…

Nanami will try to take you away from Gojo because he’s worried that his colleague will do something really stupid to the point where you are injured in the process - but your man is adamant that he won’t hurt you.

Gojo will treat you to many sweets and that will cause a little shine of excitement to shine in your eyes because it’s a kid’s dream, right?

He really likes to feed you because it seems fun to him - I can imagine him saying ‘here comes the train’ and you would just grab the fork and guide it to your mouth.

When Gojo finally lifts up his blindfold, you would be surprised by them because they are so shiny - like you would stare at them for quite a bit that causes Gojo to freeze because you were dead frozen.

But when you show the brightest smile and place your hand on his cheeks, he relaxes before letting you do what you want to do. 

Say “Pwetty eyes” and Gojo will blush on the spot because you would always compliment his eyes when you were in your original form.

When the time has passed the 24-hour mark and you are back to normal, Gojo will instantly tell you what happened before you even ask - like “you were so adorable as a baby~ where are your baby photos?” while scrolling the pictures through his phone to show you.

He will 100% have baby fever after...

When Sukuna discovers you in your miniature form as a child, he will laugh at you for a good hour or more because he thinks how funny it is that you let a curse affect you like this.

However, what Sukuna finds really weird is that you’re not really afraid of him but rather interested because you would move closer to him to get a good look.

You will 100% tug on his kimono to get his attention and at first, it does annoy him completely because you are messing up with clothing but after a while, he finds it really assuming that you want his attention.

If you are in his domain, he will let you roam around in the water but he will find it really irritating that you are making loud noises since he is used to the quiet.

If you trip or fall down on your face, expect the King of Curses to laugh at you because he laughs at everyone’s misery - but he will be shocked that you haven’t cried at all.

He is the type of person that would say kids have no fear whatsoever - that is because of you.

Unlike the others, Sukuna will carry you by the collar of your shirt or just the back of your shirt and leave you hanging for some time - but it’s fun for you since you're just chilling and swinging.

Just because you are his significant other, doesn’t mean the word ‘brat’ won’t leave his mouth when he addresses you - the second you become a child, is the moment where you are a brat to him, but a brat that he loves.

After a while, when you start walking around in his domain after relaxing for some time, Sukuna would follow you slowly from behind because it just wants to see you waddle…

When you sit with him on his little skull seat, you will either play with his hands because his nails are just really long and you find that interesting or you would trace his marks because who the hell has marks on their face?

Sukuna would once again comment how children have no fears but wouldn’t stop you from touching the markings that he has on his face because he finds your expression of awe quite funny.

When you go back to your original form and remember nothing, Sukuna wouldn’t really tell you what happened but will just give you a smirk before saying “so what are you going to repay me with since you annoyed me so much as a little brat?” - huh?

When Nanami finds you in your little toddler state after being hit with a curse technique, he will literally have a whole staring contest with you for a few minutes.

You would probably stare at him for quite some time as well before either your eyes begin to tear up because he looks really scary or your arms would raise up, conveying to him that you want to be picked up.

You would call him ‘Nanamin’ just like how Itadori does and when Itadori finds out, he can’t help but find it really cute that you have picked up his habit.

For a child, you are quite interactive since when Nanami comes back to inform the school, you would wave to greet everyone that walks past and Gojo will find it really amusing - Nanami wouldn’t show it, but he thinks it’s endearing of you.

Gojo will definitely laugh at you for sometime before reaching out to hold you, only for you to wrap your arms around Nanami’s neck really tightly.

You would definitely fiddle with his glasses and try to put them on your face because it seems fun and you always wanted to try them on - now you have an excuse.

Nanami will make sure that you are well taken care of. He will make sure that you have eaten, hydrated with water, be in safe hands if he needs to go somewhere and he will help you clean up if you need help.

Let's just say he is the most responsible out of the four people in this headcanon right now because he is Nanami Kento.

If you somehow manage to get close to his weapon, he will quickly take it away from your reach because he is worried that you might hurt yourself.

Nanami has made one rule to himself and that is to never leave you in the care of Gojo Satoru because he has no idea what he would do with you - I don’t think he would take you to Ino as well because...it’s Ino (In conclusion, he will leave you to Shoko).

When Ino first sees you, he thinks Nanami is joking with him until he notices how much the child looks like you, only to shout your name in complete surprise causing you to giggle because it’s a funny sight.

If you snuggle your head in the crook of his neck, Nanami can’t help but smile slightly because it reminds him now you would do that as an adult when he came home from work and he can’t help but find it adorable that you kept that habit.

When you go back to your adult form after the 24 hours are up, Nanami will tell you what happened if you want to know and will probably warn you about the blackmail material Gojo has gained in the process.

© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost

[x-childish-x]

Yes, it's me again ;) Could I also please request prompt 4, 8 and 60 with sweet FrankenKyle, please? Perhaps reader is trying to help him get reacquainted with pleasure and sex after everything? Lots of love!

Re-Teaching

Pairing: Fraken!Kyle x fem!reader

Fandom: American Horror Story

Warnings: NSFW!, smut, oral, male receiving, PiV

Word Count: 1075

A/N: Hello! Thank you for the request lovely! I hope you enjoy this, let me know if anything's wrong. Feedback is always appreciated! Sorry it took me awhile to get out, I've been incredibly busy. Lots of love right back to you.

Summary: You help Kyle get reacquainted with the feelings of sex.

(Gif not mine!)

Being a part of the coven had its ups and downs. The other girls, the secrecy, your supreme. But the most prominent up and a down in your life was Kyle. You had thought it was a terrible idea for Madison, Zoe, and you to go to that party, and you thought it was an even worse idea for Madison and Zoe to bring Kyle back. And in a sense, you were correct.

Kyle was not Kyle, rather a fraction of his former self you'd met at the party. You hated how Madison and Zoe had picked the "best parts" and brought him back into a world that he could hardly function in. However, there was a brighter side. Kyle had chosen you. Out of the three of you, Kyle chose you to follow, to latch onto, to go to for help. 

You spent hours each day helping reacquaint Kyle with life. From things like helping him get dressed and eat to speaking and writing. Truthfully, you loved helping Kyle... hell, let's not lie you love him. And you didn't doubt that he loved you too, times like right now proved it.

Kyle currently clung to your arm as he sat beside you, quietly saying the words on the cards. His head rests on your shoulder and it made you happy to see him so content.

"That's all of them, Kyle," Your voice was soft as you looked down at him, his head staying to stare at the cards, "You did so much better. You're really improving."

He grunted softly, making you shift so he was forced to lift his head and look at you, "What's wrong, Kyle?" 

He shifted his position again, grunting and mumbling, "Want... you."

You smiled, pulling the boy into your chest, "I'm right here, Kyle."

"No!" He whined, pulling back, "Like... this."

Kyle leaned forward, very softly pressing his lips to yours. Tears welled in your eyes, and immediately you kissed him back, guiding his lips under the realization that you'd have to reteach him everything. Kyle pulled you into him, but unlike all the other times you'd hug, you were forced to straddle his lap. Your new position caused a soft whimper to leave Kyle's mouth as you became aware of his hard-on.

"What gave you this idea, Kyle?"

You pulled back, brushing the boy's bangs out of his eyes gently, "Movie... t-thought.. of... you."

You smile, standing up and grabbing his hand. Your lips reconnected with more fever this time, letting you know that Kyle was beginning to feel more confident. And when you gently pushed Kyle to lay down on your bed as you felt your confidence grow.

Kyle chose you. 

No matter how hard Madison and Zoe tried in the beginning, Kyle chose you. Over and over again, each time he chose you. 

"I'll teach you. But... let me know if you get uncomfortable, okay?" 

Kyle nodded to you as you began to slowly kiss down his jaw. Gently, you removed his shirt and began to kiss down his chest, promptly a quiet whine from Kyle. Getting him undressed was easy, seeing as you had helped him get dressed in the beginning. But now, it felt so much different. 

You smiled at Kyle as you kissed the tip of his length, beginning to stroke him, "Do you like it when I touch you like that?"

"M-more," Kyle whined, "Please!"

You nodded, taking the tip of his into your mouth and sucking. A loud, sinful moan left Kyle's mouth the moment your warm lips wrapped around his length. You bobbed slowly at first, allowing him to get reacquainted to the feeling before you took him out of your mouth. Crawling up Kyle's body, he immediately pulled you down, his lips connecting with yours in urgent need.

"More!" Kyle whined loudly, "More! More!"

"Sit back, and enjoy."

You smiled, taking his length in your hands and rubbing his tip between your folds. A soft moan left your mouth as you gently pushed him in, sinking down on him. Kyle's hands immediately grabbed your hips as whines began to leave his mouth. You cupped his cheek, drawing his attention to you.

You smiled slightly at his needy looked before beginning to move. He filled you up deliciously, and as you began to roll your hips while bouncing on him, you couldn't hold in your moans. Kyle's whines filled the air with your moans as you bounce on top of him. He slid in and out of your walls perfectly, his size making your whining increase the quicker you bounce. 

Kyle is struggling to keep control, and you notice that in the way his hips begin to move up to meet yours. You are absolutely drenched around him, something was just so incredibly arousing about being the one to re-teach Kyle what pleasure was.

His grip on your waist tightens, and you realize he's probably close to cumming. But you expected that it was his first time after being brought back after all, of course, it wouldn't be too long, but you didn't think it would be so quick for you to come to. 

"Close!" He cries out, and you begin to wonder what movie he was watching.

"Cum for me, Kyle. Cum." 

He lets out a deep, throaty groan as his hips still and his grip tightens even more, surely leaving bruises. You roll your hips a few last times before your orgasm washes over you. You blame its intensity on the extra heat you felt from being able to teach Kyle. You figured this would be just the start, the start to many more lessons about pleasure. Maybe you should get him some more movies. 

One of Kyle's hands lets go of your waist, finding your own hands holding you upon his chest as soft whines leave your lips while you come down from your high. Kyle squeezes your hand, watching your face in astonishment, loving the look of pleasure he'd given you.

"(Y/n)," Kyle's voice is more breathy, but it's the clearest he's ever said your name, "I... love... you."

Tears well in your eyes as you nod, a large smile coming to your face, "I love you too."

He pulls you down against his chest softly, and you feel relieved the moment his arms wrap around you. You knew your situation wasn't ideal... but you couldn't imagine yourself anywhere else in the world besides Kyle's arms.

[purplekiwis]

OMG YES! Damaged goods blurb! Can you do a fluff one where one of them is sick with seasonal flu and the other has to take care of them, but they're being stubborn about it because that's just what they do and how they are 🤧

Okay, okay... here she is! It's a bit meh I think, but I hope you like it! 🥰

*

Harry is sick and grumpy, and Y/N takes care of him (from the Damaged Goods AU)

Harry feels miserable.

He’s worse than miserable, really,

because he has a cold… or is it the flu?! He has never known to spot the differences between the two, but he recognized all of the early signs, of course...

As per usual, it started with nothing but a sore throat one morning when he woke up, that ended up lingering throughout the whole day, then came a headache, and the tiredness, and the chills…

It wasn’t so unbearable at first… but the symptoms only kept getting worse and worse as the hours went by, to the point of leaving him with no choice but to skip his classes in favor of staying in bed… suffering.

The worst part about it? He wasn’t even suffering at home – where his mom could be taking her lips to his forehead every so often to see if he had a fever, and bringing him bowls of soup and fruit cubes on that same familiar bedtray that had accompanied him throughout all his periods of sickness.

Mom would also be making sure he stayed hydrated and took his medicine in time... which by the way, he wasn’t taking any. Logically speaking, Harry knew he should have gone to a pharmacy by now, to get something to make him feel better, but how? When he couldn't even muster the will to get up and go downstairs to fill the empty water bottle perched on his nightstand.

He couldn’t move.

Every single inch of his body hurt.

And now he was starting to get shivery under his bedclothes... for fucks sake.

If only he had Pepper, his spaniel mutt puppy, around to snuggle and keep his body cozy and warm like a hot water bag... then perhaps Harry would've been in a better mood. Yeah, definitely. Pepper would've let him bury his snotty face into its soft fur, and not even think to complain if its owner left a puddle of guck all over said fur.

But well, Pepper isn't there.

And being sick sucks.

Especially because Harry really wants some cuddles... and it hasn't been helping his case whatsoever that in this trying day of illness, his mind has done nothing but think of Y/N.

Pondering over what outfit she must have worn that day and what she might be up to while he’s laying there on his deathbed. He also wonders if she has noticed his absence, and if so… if she’s worried about him.

He huffs once he checks his phone again and realizes there are still no messages from her. She doesn’t have to check on him. He knows that, but he can't help that he likes to be cared for sometimes… and as it turns out illness has a tendency to turn him into a big, needy baby... who really wants to have Y/N taking care of him. It would be so good. She could play with his hair the way he likes, give him forehead kisses, hold his hand…

Harry sighs out loud. Her company would be even better than Pepper's, he believes... although Harry isn't so sure Y/N would enjoy having his snot on her as much as his trusty pup would, but that’s beside the point.

It’s even more beside the point because he knows she's not coming to see him.

She’s mad at him, he recalls now. Stupidly so, if he's allowed to think that - he did nothing wrong, after all. She asked him for a “brutally honest opinion” on a design work she was doing for one of her classes, and he simply gave her what she asked for, plain as that. But of course, then she didn’t like what he had to say and got sulky. Just girls being girls, he guesses…

Harry should've known better than to think that would stop her from coming to see him, though. His girl was a little box of surprises, after all... a true master in the art of keeping him on his toes.

She showed up only half an hour after she was done with her classes... softly knocking on his door before poking her head inside with a smile, only for her jaw to drop in shock at the absolute misery that oozed from his pores.

“Y/N…” His voice cracked sickly, almost comically. Harry could have laughed at it if he wasn't so utterly lethargic. “What- what are you doing here?”

“Well, what do you think?” The girl huffed, shutting the bedroom door behind her and heading towards the end of the bed to get a good look at him, hands on her hips. “Why didn't you tell me you were sick? Here I was, going about my day thinking you had slept in for being a bum, only to find out through your friends that you were unwell.”

Harry bit the inside of his cheek, trying to hide his downright amusement at her worried state. Y/N was worried about him? Well then, perhaps her irritation had passed and she had forgiven him… which meant maybe he’d get to have those cuddles he wanted so bad. “I thought you were mad at me?” He poked, eyebrows arching teasingly the best they could with the little energy the muscles on his face could muster.

“Well, I was and am now even more.” She punctuated. “But I still care, obviously. How am I supposed to leave you by yourself when you look like that?” She put down the bag she was holding at the edge of the bed and kneeled next to it on the floor.

“Look like what?” He frowned again. “All snotty and gross?”

“Precisely… and an awful lot like Rudolph the reindeer as well.” Y/N added, with a soft pat to the tip of his swollen, red nose.

Harry smiled at that, right before his eyes fell on the bag over his bed. “Did you go to the store to get those creepy sheet masks you wanted?”

“Huh?” She muttured confused, before noticing where he was looking at. “Oh no, um… these are just some things I got for you. Just vitamins and those gummies for when you have a sore throat, and also uh…” Y/N's cheeks went a little hot. “I got some chicken soup from the buffet restaurant as well, you know… the one next to the drug store. I thought it might do you good…”

“You went to get all that stuff for me?” Harry asked, Y/N hummed happily in confirmation, her eyes gleaming with tenderness. “Y/N... you shouldn't have. That shit is so expensive, and I'm fine, really. It's just a cold. You dont have to worry, let alone take care of me.”

“No offence, but I think I do.” The girl challenged his statement, picking up the halfway used toilet paper roll placed on his nightstand. “For a start, you shouldn’t even be using this to blow your nose. It’ll only irritate your skin and make it more sore.”

Harry rolled his eyes playfully. “That’s such a mum thing to say…” He grumbled in attempt to mask the fact that the secret big, needy baby in him was loving every single bit of the mom talk, and the same applies to when Y/N clicked her tongue chastisingly once he stubbornly snatched the roll off her hand and pulled out some more paper.

She took the chance that he had moved his arm to move a bit closer, sitting on the edge of the bed next to his pillow. “Is there anything else I can do to make you feel better?” She asked, lovingly running her digits through his unwashed curls. They felt a little waxy and knotty in her hands, but she didn’t mind it in the slightest. She just wanted to make him feel better in any way she could. So she kept playing with his hair, scratching at the roots and combing her fingers through his strands just the way she knew he reveled in - only breaking contact once she was almost certain that he had fallen asleep on her... However, as soon as Y/N began to pull her hand away to check her phone, Harry let out a whine and bumped his forehead against her wrist, in a silent request for her to keep going. “You're such a baby sometimes…” Y/N whispered, proceeding to fulfill his wish.

��Mhm... your baby.” He sighed happily.

Y/N smiled to herself at the state of pure bliss Harry was in. So utterly distracted by the slow puffy nature of his breaths, that she almost didnt notice that his droopy eyes had opened and were now fixed on her. He cleared his throat painfully. “Y/N... can I have one of those gummies you got? My throat hurts and I really want to try one.”

Y/N let out a tiny chuckle at the pleading tone he'd used, nodding as she got up to grab the bottle from the bag. She threw it at him playfully to catch midair, knowing that his reflexes were outstanding. “Ohh these seem nice. I love lemon and honey flavored shit.” He told her whilst inspecting the label.

“Yeah?” Y/N couldn’t help but to grin, feeling quite proud of herself for picking the right flavor. But her smile quickly melted into an expression of concern once she watched Harry crack open the bottle and carelessly throw a bunch of gummies into his mouth. “Harry! What are you- that’s not candy! You can’t eat them by the handful!”

“Oi, chill out… it’s just gummies. What wrong could it do?” He asked as he blithely chewed them. Words coming out garbled since he was speaking in between a mouthful.

“Oh, I don't know, perhaps there could be anesthetics in them... but who knows? It was just a thought.” Y/N ironized.

“Really?” He made a wry face similar to hers, inspecting the label closer. “Do you think we can get high on this shit?” He smirked, still chewing as he rolled the container around to check the ingredients in the back. “Cause I'm not gonna lie, that sounds like a pretty good afternoon plan to me...” He half joked, cracking the bottle open again and dropping a couple more gummies in his palm.

Y/N heaved at the suggestion. “I think it’s more likely that you get a terrible bellyache, and we end up in the ER...”

“You really think so?” Harry asked teasingly, taking another gummy to his mouth.

“Okay, that's enough. Give me that.” Y/N demanded, pushing for him to pass the container, but all he did was shake his head with a mischievous, defiant smirk. The girl rolled her eyes at him. “You know what? Fine.” She shrugged. “Eat as many as you want. Can't wait to watch you shit the bed once those anesthetics give you a loose bottom.”

He chuckled at the warning, amused. “If you’re so bothered, why don’t you come get them from me?” He questioned, but before he could prepare himself Y/N jumped on the bed to try and take the bottle away from his hands, what forced him to abruptly sit up and hold it over his head just so she couldn’t reach it from where she sat. “That was... real cute. Is that all you got, hm?”

Y/N huffed and crawled over his legs until she was practically on his lap. Seeing right through his facade once he happily handed off the gummies without putting up a fight and wrapped his arms around her middle to pull her in for a hug instead. “You must think you're so sly, don't you?” She mumbled in question, going back to petting his hair. “If you wanted a cuddle, you could’ve just said so… I don't mind your germs.”

“I was trying to behave to avoid getting you sick, actually…”

“Yeah right...” Y/N grumbled, dropping her head on his shoulder for a moment. “But I guess, since you've already passed me the germs and all... might as well just give me a kiss, no?” She proposed shyly, waiting for Harry to make the move. He did, pulling away slightly and placing his lips in hers softly. “Mm, more.” She pouted.

“Greedy.” He joshed, pecking the girl's lips again, and again... and once more for good measure. The damage was already done, after all... they might as well just keep doing it. “I feel disgusting, though. If I knew you were coming, I would’ve at least taken a shower and brushed my teeth. Can’t believe you still want to kiss me when I am like this.”

Y/N scratched at the frizzy hairs of his nape. “I promise you don't smell or look nearly as bad as you think you do… and you taste like lemon and honey so, that’s nice.” Harry distrustfully scrunched up his nose at her allegation, sniffing up some in the process before his digits rushed to grab some more toilet paper. He took it to his nose, blowing noisily. “Alright, snotty boy…” Y/N laughed, swiftly crawling off his lap. “How about I go downstairs to plate up our soup while you pick a movie for us to watch as we eat? It can be one of those “guy movies” and all, I promise I won't complain... today only, cause I'm giving you privilege for being sick.”

His eyes strayed towards you with interest, the lower half of his face still covered behind the poorly ripped toilet paper sheets. “I was actually thinking more like a musical or a pixar movie, maybe?”

“God, Harry.” Y/N gasped in awe. “I swear I've never felt more attracted to you in my life. Snot and everything.”