#i have a lot of feelings about gabriel (affectionately)

[asksimonbelmont]

hello mr belmont!!

imagine you met gabriel belmont ٩(｡•́‿•̀｡)۶

"It’s an honor to meet a distant relative. Come, tell me of your stories. I have much to learn from you."

[wordsvomit101]

I would put him as a "sad old man" on my contact list if I were MC.

Sometimes I gotta be a bit petty for MC cause they don't do it for themself. Credits to @shyanimeboi and their friend on X: https://x.com/shyanimeboi/status/1795183592961655077/video/4

Warnings: Sexual content, complicated brainstorming about guilt and legacy.

Of course, you would say that- No but honestly, I would be pissed as hell if he said that to me directly, cause sir your brother lowkey put MC's parent on the news, made their friend see his ancestor temporarily, and then almost put them in the casket as well. It's a miracle that they do not blindly hate everything relating to angels at this point. (Although I'm glad that you at least find closure from it you dismal oldster ╮(─_─)╭)

It's a little heartwarming that he shows that he still loves his brothers a lot, given how he said: "traces that Gabriel is alive and well". It got me thinking about how it could very likely mean that he believes at some point in the future, either the other kings kill his brothers or Lucifer will have to choose between Hell (repentance) and his love for them when put in a corner he cannot back out, and with him being the Sin of Pride, I don't think he would either.

Also, if he is happy just by seeing the brand alone then his brothers either avoid attacking Paradise Lost personally or he didn't face them directly after he told off Michael more than 100 years ago and he did say that he "can no longer meet to ask how he is doing".

This first option seems like something Solomon would say. As his descendant, how MC presents themself in the daily chats and some of their options are probably the closest we get to see how Solomon would act when he was still around. An example would be how they question the goofy 3 rules policy in Paradise Lost that was set by the nobles, I will admit, I didn't think of that either. I was affected by the devoted behaviors of the nobles from both the event and the beginning of the prologue, in turn, I put Lucifer on an unreachable pedestal and I love that MC boldly questioned it and presented their opinions and rationale that bring Lucifer closer to the player and shows more air-headed sides to the nobles. They bring new perspectives and challenge the assumptions albeit in a small but significant way. I love it, I hope they do it more in the future.

He also finally said it, the holy words of every prideful bastard I know on media, "How dare you", it took 4 chats but we finally got here.

How he process his brothers' wrongdoings and his own? Very understandable and something, in my opinion, most victims would rather want to get from their offenders' family members, acceptance and acknowledgment of the issues and the damage that was done, and a genuine effort to do the right things. Familial love is very complicated, and it is… difficult to hate and condemn someone you come to love first naturally in your life. I think Lucifer, besides God (but also not really), first loves his brothers, probably the first angel to do so for their kind, and by reading the Seraphs’ comics it clearly shows how they either don’t care or hate each other guts yet still capable of loving Lucifer. He raised them, he's both their brother and their second parental figure, and he show them love outside of their devotion to God.

And how he addresses them in the chat, he calls each one of them a "child", he was being very quietly affectionate by focuses on their well-being when he saw the brand on MC. He also only does this with them and Gamigin, so it is clear how he sees them from a caretaker standpoint (the allegation of him being born in his 30s and raising his brothers is not so far-fetched now, honestly, he is the true dilf here, not God). He knows his brothers ruining other people's lives but when they turn around and love and treat him so dearly that it can feel like what they have done to others is an illusion.

When that illusion doesn't cloud his judgment and beliefs anymore? It will hurt and it can feel like his perception of his brothers are lie. It can be easy to deny the first time but since it happens again and again he has to accept the change and it ain't gonna feel great to realize how he is not the bystander here and directly or indirectly enable his brothers' atrocities (maybe join them in it too at some point, but this is just my thoughts). It gonna rewire how he views a lot of things and it gonna run back from the beginning to the current time, and with how long Lucifer lived? That's rough buddy.

Now, humans are insignificant in these guys' eyes and a single death is nothing to them in the vast universe, yes, but like Lucifer said, God made humans and with how he said it after that, humanity is a part of God's legacy. Legacy is fundamental to what it is to be human to many, something to be carved on their graves and will at the end of their time, it also helps people who live beyond them to remember and let their spirits or unconscious presence remain on the world. So despite humanity in the grand scheme of things, humans are still the work of God. By referring to God as "Our Father," besides asserting his connection, he also indirectly extends that connection to humans. It suggests a shared lineage and inherent value in all of God's creations.

If I interpret what Lucifer said correctly, then the duty of the Seraphim has always been to protect and care for all beings created by God, ensuring the preservation of His legacy. This duty encompasses all creations, whether great or small, beautiful or flawed. To destroy these creations and leave only themselves as His legacy would be a betrayal of their responsibility. A legacy, regardless of its nature, is not to be forcefully erased. Those who seek to erase it tarnish the very legacy they are meant to safeguard and were entrusted to honor.

So if they can't even accept all of God's legacy, no wonder why they can easily go hunt down every single child of one (1) man they are jealous of. Perhaps this is my speculation on what they did with Solomon, who seemed resigned to being forgotten by the devils in chapter 5. They sought to erase his entire bloodline, his descendants, and his legacy, ultimately aiming to make him extinct from the world (like how poachers do it toward endangered animals). For someone like Solomon, this, in my opinion, could be the most terrible fate for him. I honestly wouldn't put it past God's plan to make MC a part of this war for Solomon.

This option is more like the canon MC than the Solomon option from before. They felt more personal here in their anger.

The desensitization for guilt and emotional detachment is strong in this. Lucifer acknowledges the gravity and permanence of the sins he and his brothers have committed and accepts that he must coexist with his guilt and remorse, but how he goes around with it is mostly for himself. Lucifer mentions that he "voluntarily fell to Hell", a form of self-punishment despite his brothers' protests (but also calling Hell the starting point of sadness is wild cause honestly? Not that wrong, I can't see truly happy devils, and if there is, their development happened off-screen).

Lucifer’s remark that the MC is "not that meaningful enough yet" is his emotional detachment from others. His focus remains on his own internal experiences rather than on the perspectives or forgiveness of others. This detachment suggests that his pursuit of guilt is inward-focused, rather than being about seeking forgiveness or redemption through the eyes of others. Selfish and very prideful, very fitting for the Sin of Pride. The idea that Lucifer is almost addicted to the feeling of guilt points to a self-destructive aspect of his personality. It indicates that he may be using guilt as a way to continually punish himself or a way to keep feeling alive through suffering.

Now this leads to my next point:

Lucifer's search for guilt and remorse indicates a need for intense emotional experiences. Witnessing someone cry, especially if he has caused the tears, could provide a powerful emotional release or catharsis for him. This could momentarily alleviate his own feelings of guilt by transferring some of that emotional burden onto others.

Control. By inducing tears in others, he might be exerting a form of control that he lacks in his own life. This dynamic could satisfy a deep-seated need to reclaim some semblance of power over emotional outcomes.

Witnessing tears might serve as a mirror to his own inner turmoil. It externalizes the pain and suffering he feels internally, allowing him to confront it more tangibly. This externalization can create a twisted sense of connection or empathy, aligning with his need to constantly grapple with guilt.

Lucifer's enjoyment of seeing others cry could be intertwined with his own cycle of punishment and redemption. Inflicting emotional pain might be a way for him to project his self-loathing and need for atonement onto others. It creates a scenario where he can experience the aftermath of guilt without direct self-harm.

Causing others to cry could validate Lucifer's sense of guilt and reinforce his belief that he is deserving of punishment. This validation can be perversely satisfying, as it confirms his self-perception as someone who commits unforgivable sins.

Tears are often a sign of vulnerability. Seeing someone in a state of emotional rawness might create a sense of intimacy that Lucifer finds alluring. This intimacy could particularly appeal to someone who feels isolated by guilt and sins.

[thequietkid-moonie]

Can you do Adrien agreste x y/n who is a childhood friend romantic headcanons?

Childhood friend to loves w/ Adrien Agreste

[ HEADCANONS ] [ Miraculous Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir ]

Hehe ~ I like this prompt quite a lot, I just find it pretty cute 🤭 thanks for requesting it! Hope you like it

Want to know something interesting? My bestie is living her own childhood friends to lovers in real life (me envy)

To be friends with Adrien since he was a child it has to be because your family is influential or part of the fashion world, or even has to have a really good relationship with his own, otherwise Gabriel won't allow you to be friend of his son (unless is while Emily is still alive since she is more willing to let you two be friends)

Is probably that you were friends with Cloe too, however she will either don't like you much or think really high of you and think you are above everyone else (like she does with Adrien)

Adrien will appreciate a lot if you treat him as just a friend and not as the son of a famous fashion designer and, later, a model (and, actually, that is when his feelings for you start to grow), he likes just being your friend, for him it doesn't matter much if you are more the shy or introvert type, or if you are more extrovert and energetic he will be more than happy to spend time with you and, at the end, is more likely that he just get used to your own rhythm

As he grows up Adrien tries to stay with you and Cloe as much as posible since you two are his only friends, however once his feelings start to grow as an innocent crush he will just mistook them as enjoying a lot your company and tries to be even more close to you (and it could easily go unnoticed for you two being friends for so long)

Is probably that Emily would notice but decided to don't say anything and just cheerish for you two. Is also probably that Natalie notice his growing feelings for you too, but she doesn't say anything about it neither, mostly because she isn't sure about what to do in that case

As time pass his desire to go to school grows more, one of the reasons is also because he wants to be able to go to school with you (specially if you tell him stories about what you and/or your classmates have done or what you do in school, even if for you is boring for him it isn't). Adrien wants to go to the same school as you and constantly express that to you but is probably that he won't tell you when he finally tries to sneak to go to school since it could be a good surprised (although his excitement won't allow him to hide it for too long)

Once in school he is pretty excited for everything and to make new friend and yet he can't help but be a little clingy with you (as long as you allow him to)

After a while of being in the school and with his new friends it could become more obvious his interest on you, and depending in how you are (how affectionate or just by how comfortable you are around him) people could even start thinking that there is something between you two. Nino, being his closest friend, will probably the one bringing the topic, asking him to already spit it out and say if you two are together or not (followed by Alya and all the rest of his friends if they heard), Adrien insist that there is nothing between you two since in his mind is actually like that, maybe knowing that your friendship is really stronge but he thinks is because is for how long you two had been friends

After that, and since Adrien don't seem to fully identify his feelings, his friends will make their personal goal to push you two together (what doesn't seem too difficult according to them), by trying to help him understand his true feelings and trying to put you two together

From his part, once Adrien finally undestand and accept his feelings he will try to win your heart in the right way, he won't asume that you feel the same and will never dare to force his feeling on you, so, for him, the only right thing to do is court you and try to win your heart (even if his friends insist that you feel the same). He tries to be romantic and affectionate (even if he was already affectionate now it goes with a new meaning)

At the end, for him it doesn't matter much who confess to who, what matter is that you reciprocate his feelings and being able to be in a relationship with you make him feel like when he was a child, like when you used to play together and forgeting about the rest of the world, he feel incredibly happy

[adamnablelittledevil]

Reacting to The Vampire Lestat - Part III (with a bit of spoilers)

I like Gabrielle.

I'm not sure I love her, but I really like her.

I feel wrong using feminine pronouns with her, though. I feel like Gabrielle is whispering in my ear that is they/them. Like, I've never had a headcanon so strong before? I don't know about labels, but for me those are the pronouns Gabrielle would use. It's just so clear to me.

I won't use them because the book doesn't do it, the fandom doesn't do it, which I'm not criticizing because it isn't exactly 'official', so it wouldn't be real canon to... But I feel like if the books were released today, it would be. And I hope the show changes that and we can gradually adjust too.

I hope that when they write season 3, they show signs of her gender dysphoria even before she says something explicit like the "you're the man in me" conversation. I want lines that imply that, I want a look in her eyes and expressions on her face whenever she gets gender envious of guys or has to do something "feminine". The book doesn't do a lot of that because Lestat is the narrator and he is away from her, so we barely see her before the transformation/'transition' but the show has the opportunity to explore more of it and I hope they use it.

Gabrielle was born to be a vampire. I think she would nail it even without Lestat's counseling. It's just second nature for her. You go, bruh!

Gabrielle actually seems to be more fun and even affectionate than I expected? I was worried that she'd might be too confident, powerful, badass, empowered etc that she would feel cold and emotionless, because that's usually what happens with characters like these and I hate that... But so far it hasn't been the case.

She really blossomed with vampirism. Feels like she is finally getting the opportunity to have the life she was meant to live.

The only downside is the hair. That moment with the hair was so visceral. I feel bad for her. Imagine being stuck with a hair you hate and gives you body dysphoria forever. I hope the show lets her hair be short. Like, maybe her illness affected her hair or something. Or at least give her hairstyles that make it look shorter than it really is. Or make her cut it every day. I don't care. Let the dude have short hair! Period.

Lestat's reaction to all this is like... Mixed feelings. He doesn't love it. Which, I get it, all his life he knew her as a "woman". It can be weird adjusting to that, it may feel like you're losing someone. But there are these gentle moments when he separates accessories (if I remember it correctly, rings) that are masculine for her because he figures she would prefer them and when he says he'll cut her hair every night if she wants to, so it's more of unlearning and grieving what/who he thought was 'real' and adapting to a new reality. It's not an "okay, let's go!" reaction as if nothing happened, specially for the time being (1700s), it's complicated, but he seems to be open. I can't speak for everyone who is trans and/or under the non-binary umbrella, but it was human to me and I have no problems with it.

Alright, so whether it was incestuous before or not, now it clearly is. I do hope it started now and not when they were human, though.

She was my mother, my fledgling, my child (sort of), my roommate, basically the only friend I had and my lover. I mean, not exactly, but I thought the joke was funny.

I feel like if I talk about the incest, it has to be on another post because it would probably take too long. There are way too many things to talk about and I'm still approaching the middle of the book.

Let's just say it sort of makes works with how the book, the characters, this species and universe are written. I can sort of get it, at least for now. Is it necessary? No. Would the show suffer if they don't do the incest? Not all. Is it random, irrelevant, only for shock value and because "let's get nasty freaky and controversial these are vampires and this is gothic horror grow up cupcakes deal with it hahaha"? Also no! It has some kind of logic. But I feel like Lestat and Gabrielle are already layered enough with their parent/child/maker/fledgling/sort of envious of each other (including the fact they're both gender nonconforming to some extent) dynamic on its own, that there's plenty to cover here without incest. Still, if the show goes there (and I'm afraid they will), I also expect it to make sense and not be just for the sake of being seual, weird and controversial. I believe Rolin is too good to write something that mediocre and poor. So, I can live without it, but I'm also trusting the show to do whatever their thing is. Let's see, I guess.

Also, at least at the moment, it's not as big as people make it out to be. Again, to talk about this properly I'd need another post, but it's not like they sleep together, they're head over heels in love with each other or anything. Like I said, there's some logic that is kind of complicated to explain here, but it's not that radical and it's not that often. Sometimes I even genuinely and wholeheartedly forget about it. Fortunately, there are way too many other (and more) interesting things going on to focus on.

Gabrielle learning about her powers is really fun too, maybe even more fun than Lestat since she's such a natural at this whole thing.

And their maker/fledgling dynamic is entertaining as well.

She's like, climbing walls, jumping from roofs etc like a cat, just having the time of her life and while Lestat gets pretty adventurous and experimental with his powers too, it's not as much? Gabrielle takes it to the next level (good for her).

Like, sometimes he has to stop Gabrielle like a father with his kid, like "CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO HOME WE CAN DO MORE TOMORROW" and it's simply hilarious.

Stop it, Lestat, let Gabrielle HAVE FUN!

Gabrielle just gives major Cat Woman vibes. Now I need Cat Woman-esque scenes on the show with her climbing and jumping between buildings etc. WE HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL AND THE VISION IS CO CLEAR. Do it, Rolin!

It's cool that Lestat finally has some real company and someone with whom he can be open about being a vampire.

Loneliness is the biggest thing for him on the show and I have a feeling it's the same thing on the books. And it's even worse here, because there are moments where he is completely alone and in so much pain (and we haven't seen that on the show yet). Having Gabrielle around made things better for him and he hasn't cried in a little while (and he was crying A LOT on those first two chapters, for very understandable reasons), so this was a nice turn for him and the story.

I also think he enjoys being her mentor, like it gives him a sense of purpose and pride. Reminds me of how he talked about the way he felt at the monastery. And it's sweet to see him teaching Gabrielle stuff.

And sometimes he feels like an old and tired single dad and it's just funny. Like, Gabrielle is ready to create the vampire Olympics and win gold for every single sport and he just wants to sleep. Lestat is too much and loves playing around, but Gabrielle is too much even for HIM. Imagine having more energy than the actual ADHD child. What a legend. They're hilarious. A lot of room to play with humor with these two and I hope they use it.

P.S. Nothing is permanent, opinions might change and this is based on Lestat’s narration, which can be unreliable. I’m reading the books so I can find out more about the characters, what potential events might happen in the show, what I can expect etc. This is my favorite show in the universe, so I want to be as informed as possible. I have no idea if I’ll become a legit fan of the books or not, but so far I’m enjoying it. I’m posting these comments only for fun.

[princess-of-the-corner]

Idea, with the negative reads on both Chloe & Adrien's parents, imagine a parent swap?

IE, Gabriel/Audrey & Emilie/Andre.

Gabriel/Audrey

Its two massive egotistical perfectionists who ae incredibly callous and easily given to cruelty. They are a power couple in the most terrifying sense of the word and place basically no regard on those around them except how it serves their interests.

When things are good.

If there's ever a problem a mishap. a failure, oh boy can it become destructive & given Audrey is intensely independent and Gabriel is a massive control freak I can envision there being no shortage of room for conflict.

I imagine whichever kid they end up with is either a traumatized and nervous wreck, often used as ammo against the other parent & needing to navigate their endless expectations & drama. & or wound so tightly they're going to pop and kill someone.

Emilie/Andre.

They are on the surface loving and indulgent parents. Unfortunately they are also intensely selfish and toxic people who are just instinctively good at dressing up their behavior.

Andre is blatantly corrupt and considers this fine, he will oscillate between sycophant's and stern power house as needed. His relationships exist to make him feel good about himself & stop mattering the moment he's not in the mood.

Emilie is more on the surface moral, but will happily compromise any moral or belief if it gets her what she wants. What she wants is to be the apple of of someone's eye, their sun, their moon, their definition of love. Andre showers her with gifts & her to him affection.

Their child is someone they have insulated and isolated, they don't want to share, they don't want them to leave, they want them always around (When they are wanted) and always focused on how great they are. Its looks loving but it basically two parasites using their child for food.

I would have suggested Gabriel/Andre & Emilie/Audrey but that'd just canon with the genders swapped right? Huh... Maybe not?

If one were to touch on the sociological side of things, gosh being openly queer would potentially affect a lot. Especially whether some of them could even make it big. If nothing else their trajectory might change a bit.

If we ignore the sociological and treat their relationship as totally normalized culturally, so its just their personalities being kept in mind...

I think there is stuff to muse on definitely, but needing sleep I might be less than my best with this one XD

Emilie/Audrey

High flying famous stars, they go where their work is. For Emilie this means studios and locations, for Audrey its a mix of New York, Paris, Milan and so on.

Their child is likely used to being carted around as Emilie's luggage, essentially a mascot and emotional support dummy she says she loves cos she likes the idea of them adoring her.

Audrey is far more indifferent unless they impress her, but is more keyed into the marriage itself. Emilie is exceptional and while inclined to be swept up in Audrey's wake, can coax some tact from her.

She is still distant, harsh and near impossible to please however and neither think much of their Childs needs & tend to be very much enamored with one another when times are good & when not... There's work.

Likely a very unpredictable, isolating and unstable childhood with an affectionate but emotionally selfish parent and a callous impossible to please parent.

Gabriel/Andre

Definitely a bit more public than the hyper private Agreste of canon; Gabriel's penchant for isolation and antisocial behaviors, would still exist.

This would n many way ways suit Andre as it lets him be the socializer, the face, the mover and shaker the one who meets people and is protecting his dear husband by handling all this stuff in one way or another.

Gabriel's more aloof nature would beckon one like a moth to flame however and he likely thinks of himself as the protector in the same way the viziard who rules through the puppet prince is a protector.

Both are very much in favor of corraling their child in the home, Andre so he can always have a source of easy affection & praise & Gabriel because he wants everything under his control.

Andre is probably the "Fun parent" but provides nothing but superficial acts. While Gabriel does want to raise said child to be a success, he also doesn't care if they are happy or have opinions.

So in both cases rather similar to canon but also distinct I think?

Either way these kids are FUCKED

[rottenwhimsy]

villanelle and autism

side notes before i begin:

some of these traits could also be explained by cluster b disorders, as she’s heavily bpd coded and canonically aspd, but i see her as both cluster b AND autistic.

also, please don’t say things like “YES she’s not a psychopath, she’s autistic instead” because she’s still very much aspd and i don’t want to take that away. i’ve seen a lot of people with aspd really identify with villanelle and say she portrays it well.

just scroll if you don’t agree, this is a harmless headcanon and i’m simply explaining why i have this headcanon, as well as why a lot of autistic people seem to relate to her (people get SO mad if you even insinuate a popular character might be autistic lol)

masking/mirroring

masking is a strategy used to hide neurodivergent traits in order to blend in with neurotypicals. this can include mirroring (mimicking others expressions/behaviors), or even entire persona changes.

in the very first scene villanelle carefully observes a man smiling then mimics his smile (1x01)

villanelle hears a woman laugh on the radio then mimics her laugh, later she reuses that same laugh with sebastian (1x02)

liked copying the statue people in the street (2x05)

often mimics konstantin and predicts what he’s going to say

can quickly switch personas, adopts different accents and dialects quickly, and reuses phrases that are said to her

taking things literally

when talking about villanelle anna says “she was quite literal” and goes on to describe how villanelle misinterpreted a joke so confidently that she killed someone because of it (1x07)

interprets the bible extremely literally in season 4

“i have children” “i don’t want your children” (1x05)

“sheep are happier than wolves” “you spend your time off surveying sheep?” (3x08)

took konstantin saying “do something normal” literally (1x02)

“you are not a pumpkin, you a beautiful” (1x04)

kills gabriel because she thought he was genuinely asking to die when he was expressing how sad he was about his situation (2x01)

sensory seeking (& sensitivities)

touches and focuses on the texture of the liliana rizzari duvet, goes out of her way to ask the man she’s killing for the name of the duvet, later purchases it for herself and carefully feels the texture of it again (1x01)

generally touches and smells everything

“i want to smell her skin” (4x03) as well as her describing her ideal perfume in detail then asking eve and konstantin to smell her (3x03)

hates wearing crocs and other “non-nice” things, is very fixated on “nice” things like high quality clothes and food

makes people stroke her hair when she’s feeling upset (2x05 and 4x01)

bold fashion with a lot of colors/patterns/textures

seems to dislike most people hugging her

more up to interpretation, but she wore headphones in 3x04 and 3x05, once while she was having a meltdown on a train

struggles with social cues

includes coming off as blunt/rude, trouble navigating groups, and not interpreting situations correctly

how awkward and blunt she was at her wedding (3x01)

interacting with the church, especially in 4x02

doesn’t know how to react to displays of emotion (gabriel crying, benita crying, was confused and froze when her brother was being affectionate)

doesn’t understand why some people are upset with her (konstantin in s2, may in s4, eve at multiple points)

doesn’t understand that certain things will make people upset (being very blunt with gabriel then being put off when he starts crying)

struggles with understanding boundaries

doesn’t see authority figures as an authority (teasing and flirting with the prison guards, threatening konstantin, casually killing anton, doesn’t seem to understand consequences)

does not follow rules that don’t make sense to her

breaks into eve’s house expecting a normal dinner, doesn’t know how to calm eve down and ends up making her panic more (1x05)

didn’t understand why eve’s coworkers were acting scared of her (3x08)

is confused as to why sebastian laughs when she says she likes national anthems (1x02)

not understanding why her mom was laughing at her and that it was mocking “you always laugh at things that aren’t funny” “like you?” “yes” (3x05)

stimming

the repetitive performance of certain physical movements or vocalizations in order to self soothe or express emotion

big jumpy happy dance (3x04)

during cup game (3x05)

jumping and spinning on the heels of her boots by the train with rhian (3x08)

her copying noises she hears could be a type of vocal stim, echolalia

on the train ride at the end of 3x05

there are more examples but i can’t list them all since she generally bounces around a lot and has a lot of big movements

inappropriate/bizarre responses

yelling “this is so BORINGGG” while in an art museum (2x04)

“i mean i masturbate about you a lot” (1x08)

yelling “JUST DUNK ME” while getting baptized (4x01)

soooo many instances that again i can’t list them all…

alexithymia

alexithymia is the difficulty feeling or identifying emotions (or physical stressors like pain)

her whole aa meeting speech in 2x06 about how she feels nothing and the distress it causes (is extremely bored, hurts herself and it doesn’t hurt, just wants to feel something)

doesn’t know if she’s telling the truth or not (2x07), this could also be because of masking as too much masking can cause identity confusion, not knowing what you’re faking and what’s authentic

weakened sense of danger, even says “i don’t get scared” (2x08)

says she’s fine then immediately collapses (2x01)

other traits

meltdowns, especially at the end of 3x05 where she was wearing headphones and had increased stimming while crying

low empathy

attaches to and fixates on a specific person, obsession prone

REJECTION SENSITIVE DYSPHORIA

has always felt estranged and inherently different from others, “i’m not normal you know” (2x01)

detail oriented, notices things others don’t

bad at dancing/rhythm

exaggerated facial expressions

exaggerated speech

poor impulse control

differences in expressing emotions and communication

only comfortable with select people

perfectionism, hates working with a team and wants to do jobs alone (1x04, 3x02)

feels threatened when irina knows more languages than her, as languages are something villanelle is very interested in (1x08)

black and white thinking

[over-the-moon-for-you]

Gabriel O'Hara - SFW Alphabet

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He is VERY affectionate. He wears his heart on his sleeve, constantly telling you how much he loves and cares about you. Not shy of PDA whatsoever, if anything, you probably have to tell him to dial it back a bit. (He does give the best hugs tho 🙈)

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Gabriel is the most loyal friend you'd ever meet. He's always ready to do anything you want to in a second's notice. Though you better be prepared to listen to all of his little ramblings bc this man LOVES to talk. He's a sweetheart though and is always there when you need him.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

BRO LOVES CUDDLING!!! He loves the feeling of having you wrapped up in his arms after a long workday. He's pretty tall (i personally hc him at 6’4) and the right amount of toned, so you fit in his arms perfectly. Though he doesn't mind being cuddled by you either, especially when he's upset about something. He's prone to panic attacks, so being comforted in your arms really helps him come back down to reality.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He would honestly be more than happy to settle down with you! His dream is to one day own a house and have a little family of his own. He would probably bring up the idea to you, but won't push you into anything you aren't comfortable with.

In all honestly, this man can't cook. He truly does try, there are few dishes he can do that his mother had taught him, but other than that, he’s hopeless. Though to make up for it he is actually decent at baking. His favorite thing to make are snickerdoodle cookies :)

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

If he breaks up with you, you must have done something absolutely horrid to him because he tends to do everything in his power to try to make a relationship work, even if it might be a bit toxic.

If you were to break up with him, Gabri would be absolutely heartbroken. A flaw of his is that he gets attached so easily, so you breaking up with him would leave him totally devastated. He would do everything he could to try to make amends, but ultimately knows that this would be the end. He would overthink everything about the relationship for at least two or three weeks, wondering what he did wrong or more specifically, what was so wrong with him? (this is so sad please don't do this to him 🥺)

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

I don't think it would take to long for Gabriel to know you were the one he wanted to marry. As stated before, he's extremely loyal, so once you two get together, he's ready for the long haul. He would probably propose after a year or two after the both of you start dating. If you'd prefer to wait longer into the relationship to get married, he wouldn't push you into it, but he may overthink your answer and get worried that you don’t see a future for the two of you.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Physically, Gabriel is such a sweet and kind man, not a bad bone in his body. He's never afraid to shower you with his affection. The roughest part about him would be his hands that are extremely calloused up from constantly working on inventions.

Gabriel is a very emotionally open guy. So, it's common he'll come to you and tell you how he's feeling, especially if he's upset. He overthinks constantly, which takes a drain on his own mental health. He definitely needs a lot of reassurance at the beginning of your relationship. (his past relationships had a huge impact on his trust issues)

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He loves hugs!!! Hug this man!!! Will always accept or give a hug. He just loves physical contact in general. His hugs are always warm and comforting. He won't let go until you want him to.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He would def blurt it out within days of meeting you. He's a hopeless romantic and knows exactly what his heart wants. The minute he catches feelings, he will fall hard. If you see him the same way, he'll be over the moon and ready to spend the rest of his life by your side.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He's the type of guy to say he doesn't get jealous easy and trusts his partner completely, but when he sees you getting a little too close with someone, he feels his stomach drop. If it's a onetime thing with that person, he would most likely get over it within a day or two, but if it becomes a constant thing, he will immediately begin to think you were losing interest in him and that it was his fault. It would end up with him calling you at the crack ass of dawn, his voice trembling a little as he asked you if you stilled loved him or not.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Gabriel's kisses are soft and sweet. He will kiss you anytime and anywhere. He does make an effort to not go to overboard when the two of you are in public, but once you to are alone. Oh, he's making sure there isn't an inch of you that hasn’t been touched by his lips.

He loves kissing your lips the most. The feeling of your lips on his always seem to make him weak at the knees each time without fail. (If you run your hands through his hair while you kiss him, he will literally melt into you)

He loves when you kiss his neck the most. To be more specific, when he's laying back on a couch or bed with you on top of him, your lips trailing kisses from his jaw down to his collarbone. He adores when you leave hickeys on his neck. Whenever he looks in the mirror and sees the red marks, it makes his heart flutter knowing you were the one that left them there. Plus, his scarfs usually cover them up pretty well so they're not noticeable to the public eye.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He is so good with children!! Gabriel absolutely adores kids with his entire heart. He'd be the type of person to make silly faces at babies when he sees them crying in attempt to cheer them up. He definitely would love the idea of having his own kids someday.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Gabri is not a morning person whatsoever. He will stay in bed as long as possible, usually convincing you to stay with him. You both end up being late to everything because of this. He just loves the feeling of the warm sun shining through the curtains and the both of you cuddled up, limbs intertwined with one another.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He absolutely has to cuddle with you to fall asleep, no exceptions. He doesn't really care about who the little or big spoon is, all that matters in the feeling of your bodies close together.

It is also common for him to get nightmares every now and then. For the most part your usually able to help him to fall back asleep quite quickly with some soothing words, but in other cases, he'll end up having a panic attack and will need a ton of comforting.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Oh, he does not wait to tell you everything about himself. He can ramble on and on, easily getting lost in his own thoughts. Gabriel just loves when someone shows interest in him and will gladly tell them anything they wanted to know. (This stems off of the fact his mother gave him an insane amount of attention as a child))

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

It depends. For the most part he is probably the most laid-back person in his family (that’s not saying much). With that being said, once someone does push his buttons too far, he will snap, and this man can yell. It’s honestly a bit scary. He would never physically hurt anyone though.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

HE REMEBERS EVERYTHING!!! You mention a candy you like? Suddenly he has a small basket of every variety of that candy to exist waiting at your front door. You tell him your coffee order once? Will make sure to write it down in his notes so he would never mess it up. He's attentive and loves to be able to surprise you with your favorite things.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The first night you spent at his apartment, the two of you had been messing around, playing some old love songs (think of everybody loves somebody or somethin' stupid). Jokingly, he asked you to dance with him and you accepted. The two of you ended up slow dancing in the middle his living room, the lights dim. He remembered staring into your eyes, adoration in his eyes. This was the moment he knew for a fact he was in love.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Gabriel is the right amount of protective. He won't forbid you from going out own your own or with your friends, all he asks is that you update him from time to time just so he knows you're doing okay. If he sees someone getting a bit too close for comfort to you and you are obviously uncomfortable, Gabriel will immediately swoop in a wrap his arm around you, giving the man a shit eating grin. If he's walking with you and hears someone catcall you? Will immediately respond as if they were towards him, thanking them with some silly remark, easily making whoever catcalled you embarrassed.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts his heart and soul into everything he does for you. He will actively always be looking for events to be able to take you to like concerts or fairs. If you'd prefer to stay in? He'd do his best to replicate a candlelight dinner in his apartment, scattering rose petals around and letting the room be filled lit only by candles. He'd also make sure to go to an Italian restaurant beforehand and get some entrees the two of you could share. (again, he can't cook but he's doing his best 🥺)

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

As mentioned earlier, he overthinks...a lot. Often will misinterpret situations, making his mind always come to the conclusion you would leave him like many others in his life have. This is more prominent in the earlier stages of the relationship. Once you've been together for a few years, he'll begin to ease up on those thoughts.

Attention whore !!! 💀💀 He will constantly try to get your attention in any way possible. Whether that means trying to impress you with his inventions, bringing you gifts, or simply just look at you with the biggest puppy dog eyes. He will do anything to have your focus on him.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Gabriel is very much into fashion. Won't leave the house unless he is completely satisfied with his outfits. Especially his scarfs!!! Literally the only other thing he loves almost as much as you.

Physically, Gabriel has up and down days. He does go to the gym when he gets the chance, which gives him more of a toned body. Though he obviously isn't anything compared the way nMiguel looks. He feels as though Miguel has the definition of a perfect body and it makes him feel a bit down about the way he looks. It gets to the point where he gets nervous for you to meet Miguel, scared that you'll think his brother is better looking and break up with him.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

If he's gotten attached to you (which is most likely), yes. When he doesn't have you by his side anymore, it drains him mentally and physically. He's a dependent person, needing to have at least one person to be able to go to immediately when needed. He doesn't like the feeling of being completely alone. (bro was an absolute mess for MONTHS when he found out Miguel straight up left the universe without telling anyone)

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He loves shopping with you!!! It's one of his favorite things to do. You both could spend hours in the mall with one another, going to different stores and looking at clothes with each other. (he’s actually really good at styling you as well)

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Anyone who is just truly mean at heart. If someone is constantly snapping at him, telling him what to do, or just belittling him in general, that is a big no. Really all he wants is someone who will love him for just being who he is.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

HE STEALS ALL THE BLANKETS WHILE SLEEPING.

The two of you will always go to bed with the blankets covering the both of you perfectly, then when you awake, suddenly you can feel the air of the room hitting your back while Gabriel managed to wrap himself into all the blankets like a burrito. Then when you try to attempt to grab some of the blanket back, he’ll whine, subconsciously trying to keep the blankets on him. You literally have to shake him awake and only then will he hesitantly give you back your half of the cozy blanket.

[kalolasfantasyworld]

2, 9, 17, and 20 for Helena from the interview questions?

Hi Erika! 💕

Thank you for your ask ^^ These are some interesting ones and Helena is reminiscing some funny situations.

2. Who is your best friend?  Tell us about them.

I don’t really like the term best, because it says as if someone was better than the others. I think that they’re just different and I don’t want to choose. However if I have to in this case the closest to the dictionary best friend of mine would be Vanessa. Hah, what do you want me to say? She’s just amazing. So funny and always has my back. She’s that kind of a friend you can go out drinking with and come over crying, good or bad, which she has proven to me many times. She’s also that devil friend of our friend group. She got me a wayyy too inappropriate swimsuit and did I mention that time, when she convinced me to buy a bunny suit? I obviously thanked her for that later, but it was risky... I had no idea how Nozel would react.

(Yes this is a teaser for a short fade to black one shot I wrote for the bunny suit Helena drawing. I'll hopefully post it some time soon.)

9. Are you a spiritual person?  If yes, what do you practice?

I wouldn’t say that I’m greatly spiritual. Yes I believe in higher power and I attend all of the appropriate spiritual events. My marriage was done by Clover faith as well, but I think I believe in people more. I’m not practicing a lot out of my own volition.

17. What makes you laugh?

Many things. Is that an answer? I’ll just pick a few then. Let’s start with… drumroll… Nozel’s eye-rolls! I’m being serious. I tease and instead of laughing he makes this affectionate eye roll or furrows his brows, it’s just so adorable I can’t help but giggle. Now for something else that makes me laugh… annoying Gabriel. I’m his big hermana I have to keep him in check… just that he bites back. However all the laughs are worth it. Another thing, so when Heinry tries to mimic No— now I’m starting to think that I’m a bad wife considering how much I laugh at my husband. I should stop talking, I feel like I’m digging an even bigger hole for myself. To sum up I laugh a lot. I’m a joyful woman.

20. Describe your biggest pet peeve.

As you know I’m a princess, I was raised a princess and I was taught all the appropriate court etiquette and manners. I know that most of the people are not taught the rules of Royal dining, but I would love for them to at least eat with their mouths closed and try to use utensils. I just… can’t stand it. It even happened during an official dinner once. This one noble house representative came to gain our favour and he would talk, while chewing. I’m usually great at controlling myself in social situations, but at the desert Nozel had to walk out with me for a minute, before I would say something inappropriate. 

[kit-williams]

Barn Anon. "Oh don't worry, he won't bite." I say as my highly dangerous adorable Space Marine looms behind me menacingly.

You're a bit confused. A Blood Angel had been following you home for a few days now. You don't understand why he has been doing so but he doesn't seem to be dangerous. Or at least not to you. He croons to you, seemingly asking what are you doing as he makes his way over to you. He tilts his head, looking curiously at your tray of unbaked muffins.

You push his hand away before he can prod at one. He hovers at your side as you slide the tray into your oven and turns it on. He speaks in that odd language, unsure when you walk away from the oven. As if he's confused about why you're not staying to watch it. You pull on his hand and he follows you, glancing back at the oven now and then.

Large metal arms wraps around your waist, your Blood Angel buries his face against your neck. More words you don't understand. His actions aren't unusual to you however. You shift in his arms to face him, playfully booping his nose. Soft purr-like sounds from him.

He's a lot clingier and affectionate than what most people say their Space Marines are. Though you realize why when he first took his helmet off. He's younger than most of the Space Marines that people find themselves with. Your Blood Angel beams happily when you reach up to ruffle his hair. He's so cute, your oversized ray of sunshine. You can get used to this, letting him nuzzle against your neck, blissfully unaware of how his affection wars with the urge to sink razor sharp fangs into your vulnerable neck.

Sorry if its kinda a funky one I think its because I wrote some Yandere as well today

You look up at the locks of red hair that flow down his shoulders. You get confused feelings sometimes but that's said to be common with Blood Angles and their successors as well as Emperor's Children as well... people get confused and sometimes the Astartes themselves don't help with how they act. Like your pretty boy... whom you've taken to calling Gabriel after the angel.

He is an angel... your angel and you don't see how your Gabriel could be dangerous or deadly as you were told. He brings you pretty items that he makes... the paintings he paints can when he's feeling down look very religious at times with a dying angel in them or very blood heavy like the one you have on the wall... a chalice of blood over flowing with bodies strewn about in the background as there is this angelic figure in all of his what you call "moody" paintings either dying or rising.

You can't help but laugh softly as he snuggles you and is just affectionate though you worry about the way he puts his mouth on your neck... you're warned about Blood Angels getting bity or something about an oral fixation almost. Gabriel coos and trills in his delightful sing songy voice in that language you don't understand as you could get lost in his pretty golden eyes.

But you hear the oven beep and he picks you up eagerly as it seems your little ball of sunshine wants a muffin.

[in-kyblogs]

need to know more about italian lestat and why is this so overshadowed by his french side 😤

Have you heard about the fact that Lestat is nonbinary on his mother side? We could say the Italian thing is the same kind of situation really lmao

His mother, Gabrielle De Lioncourt, was born in Naples and grew up there. It was common for Italian nobles to marry in France for political alliances reasons, the most famous is the Medici family from ‘400 Firenze: Caterina De’ Medici was a french queen in 1547 (fun fact: the Medici family seal has similarities to the royal French seals with the arald of a lily I think for some alliance thing in the ‘500 but I can’t exactly remember). But I digress. This is to say that, as direct neighbours, Italy and France have a lot of history and a lot of beef, mostly due to wine and cheese if you can believe it. And football. Oh, especially football.

Gabrielle isn’t really an affectionate mother, she has a complex and fascinating relationship to her role as a woman and a wife and a traumatic experience, I’d say, with giving birth to seven sons (can’t wait for her character in the show, especially since Hannah, who wrote a play on these themes called What a young wife ought to know, which I wholeheartedly recommend, said she is really excited to be writing for her!). This results in her and Lestat having a really weird relationship, cold and distant but at the same time extremely visceral due to the both of them being kind of prisoners in their own life. Gabrielle never teaches Lestat Italian, nor is particularly forthcoming about her old life or her cultural roots. When Lestat runs to Paris, Gabrielle tells him to find someone who can write Italian for him, so he can send her letters that his father can’t read. She also never bothered to teach him the alphabet, even less a second language, and she used to read Italian books that Lestat couldn’t understand. So, very mixed feelings about this on Lestat’s part I’d say. He is, I think, really resentful of this side of his mother that he isn’t allowed to know, but at the same time really fascinated by it: his first attempt at escaping is with an Italian troupe of commedia dell’arte actors, a type of play that involves a lot of improv. Basically you have a series of “maschere” (characters) that have a definite set of characteristics but no written lines (we call it canovaccio I have no idea how to translate this concept though). Each character is tied to a specific part of Italy, for example Pulcinella is the neapolitan one, Arlecchino (Harlequin) is from Bergamo (near Milan). Lestat plays Lelio in the book, a character from the italian play that is the maschera of the lover. (He is also the protagonist of a play by Goldoni where he is also a liar (title of the play Il Bugiardo), totally unrelated to iwtv but it always makes me laugh).

I basically wrote all this stuff to say that Lestat knows basically nothing about his italian heritage and that explains why it is so overshadowed by his french side, but I will say that both italian and french people are extremely extra, in wildly different ways and also they will fight each others over nothing (they stole the Gioconda btw), so this accounts for why Lestat is like that ™️. Particular about food? Italian heritage. Snobbish about music? French heritage. Extremely petty? Eh, to be fair, both. Will hold a grudge forever? I will tell you, during fifa and uefa football games we still yell at the French team about that time during the 2006 World Cup final when one of their players went and hit one of the Italian team players with a headbutt (Italy won btw💁🏻‍♀️). So yeah. Lestat never stood a chance really

[blizzardstarx]

And you’ll never see the reasons I had, for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you.

Cat!Vanessa AU Fic

Warning: Child/animal death, child/animal abuse, a LOT of gore, implied suicidal thoughts (?)

A/N: I have not written in years 😭 last thing I've written about cats/warrior cats was three years ago, and my English is kinda ass. Also, everything is the same except they are cats and some things are replaced with cat-related things or actions. The pizza is cat-safe. The animatronics/suits don't exist and instead are replaced with a kind of illusion that is still called suits that makes William or the ghost kids look like the respondent animals. The suits have spring locks. Also, some lines and scenes have been inspired by the movie novelization. Her cat character is slightly inspired by my character study essay of her 💀 which had a bunch of theories and headcanons.

The fic is divided into three parts, marked by the snowflake time skips. Vanessa’s happiest day is the three snowflakes, two snowflakes being the cat retelling of the FNAF movie, and one snowflake is the end scene with Vanessa and William.

Total stats: 6038 words, 33061 characters

Fic word count: 5868

Be compliant. Lay low. Don't disobey him.

❆ ❆ ❆

It was Vanessa's happiest day. She had turned six moons old! She could taste the rich pepperoni pizza that wafted through the air on her tongue, a soft smile on her face as a euphoric feeling filled her body. Today was perfect. Her father, William Afton, was amazing in creating this place. It was going to be the best day ever, spending it at Freddy's with her friends and family!

Vanessa had brought her plane plush with her, the orange toy in her jaws, setting it down on one of the tables. Her father had given it to her just as Freddy’s had had its grand opening. Vanessa remembered the squeal of happiness that had come out of her mouth as he gifted it to her, softly smiling. She recollected her father’s praise, her father pressing his nose to hers affectionately. She’d carried it around everywhere with her since. The she-cat’s ears perked up as she heard the small thudding of her brother's paws, followed by a few others. She turned around, spotting the group of kits. Vanessa bounded towards them, feeling the fuzzy floor beneath her tickle her paws. She approached one particular kit, a light cream tom who was barely taller than her.

A soft yelp came out of the tom's mouth as Vanessa tackled him, her blue eyes shining happily.

"You're here!"

Her brother, Cassidy chuckled underneath her.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss this for anything! And I brought our friends here," he said, a grin on his face as Vanessa got off of him, letting her brother stand on his paws.

Soft chuckling could be heard around her as Cassidy got to his paws, shaking his fur out. Vanessa glanced at the crew gathering around them, seeing a mix of colors. A golden she-kit, Susie, twitched her whiskers as she glanced at the two littermates. They were almost identical, but Cassidy was a bit taller than her, had four light paws, and was a few moons older than her, even though Vanessa felt as if they were twins. The blueish gray tom, Jeremy, was audibly laughing, while the red tom Fritz let out a soft mrrow of amusement. Gabriel, a brown tom, was the most composed, but his brilliant blue eyes shone with held-back laughter.

“This place is so cool, I can’t believe your father made this!” Fritz yipped, the three-legged cat prancing around the place.

Susie’s mouth watered at the delicious scents as she sniffed the air, following after the red tom with her cupcake plushie in her mouth. The four others followed them as they explored the pizzeria, playing the arcade games.

❆ ❆ ❆

They’d settled on sitting down at the table that Vanessa had put her toy airplane on, munching on the delicious pizza and talking. Vanessa closed her eyes as she savored the taste, praising how good it was in her mind. Music played over the speakers, playing in the background as Fritz made up a story about how he lost his leg, even though everyone knew he had been born like that. The pizzeria felt a bit empty, Vanessa’s eyes landing on the empty stage across the room. I wonder what Daddy’s going to put there? She thought, flicking her tail.

No one had yet noticed that Susie was gone, and her cupcake plushie with her.

The five finished their pizzas, and suddenly, Gabriel looked around, his blue eyes wide. “Where’s Susie?” He asked. He glanced down at her plate, that still had half of her pizza on it.

“Maybe she ran off to the arcade games again,” Fritz chuckled, his whiskers twitching.

Cassidy shot him a look before turning to Vanessa, his eyes full of worry. Vanessa returned the glance.

“I’ll go check,” Jeremy meows, the blueish-gray tom getting to his feet and padding away.

Vanessa fidgeted on her paws as she looked around, hoping to see Susie’s golden fur anywhere, to see a hint of the she-kit, to see anything.

Where did she go?

❆ ❆ ❆

Jeremy and Susie had not returned. Fritz’s usual unseriousness was turning into seriousness as the minutes went by. Gabriel shifted on his big paws, the broad brown kit’s eyes darting around nervously. “I’ll go check on both of them…” he murmurs, glancing at the three. Cassidy dipped his head, nodding as he watched the stout tom walk away. Fritz got up as well, following Gabriel.

❆ ❆ ❆

They did not return.

It was just Cassidy and Vanessa alone together.

“...Cassie… why is everyone disappearing? What’s happening to them?”

Vanessa frowned as a dreadful feeling began to creep into her fur, glancing at her brother with her wide blue eyes, her ears flattened and hackles raised.

“I don’t know, Ness… Stay here, alright? I’ll be back.”

“...Okay…”

The tom padded off to the back rooms, a grim and worrisome look on his face.

Vanessa trembled as she watched her brother, feeling as if this was a bad idea. She went against his words, silently tailing him. Cassidy ducked into the shadows, entering the room.

Vanessa saw a flash of cream fur as Cassidy recoiled away from the room, his blue eyes filled with horror and his mouth slightly agape in a silent scream. She darted towards him, revealing her presence as he spotted her. Her brother tried to keep his composure, but he could not hide the look of pure terror in his eyes. “Why did you follow me?” Cassidy yelped, blocking the room with his body, not wanting his sister to see. “C-Cassidy.. What’s happening?” Vanessa mews softly, shrinking as she tries to look past him, trying to catch a glimpse of what he has seen.

“Cassidy.”

Cassidy pushed her away forcefully, shooting her a glance as he turned his back on her. Vanessa got to her paws brushing past him, her brother yelping in horror. Bile rose in Vanessa’s throat as her tongue grew dry, gasping in horror.

Four bodies lay broken and bloodied on the tiled floor of Freddy’s.

Susie’s golden fur was stained with blood, her jaw dislocated and broken, her mouth open in a silent yowl. Jeremy’s body lay limply, his eyes ripped out of his sockets. Gabriel slumped against the wall, his brilliant blue eyes now dull and glazed over, the sticky red liquid pooling beneath him. Fritz’s right eye had been gouged out, tears staining his face.

A metallic taste filled the air, the sickly scent of blood flooding the two’s mouths and noses. A loud wail came out of Vanessa’s mouth as hot tears fell down her face. This isn’t real, this isn’t really happening. She was rooted to the ground, frozen in fear.

“Vanessa.”

Vanessa shot up in alert at the sound of her name, her hair standing on end. Her eyes landed on the yellow rabbit figure before her, blood soaking his fur, his wide predator-like purple eyes almost glowing in the darkness of the room. The figure flickered before shifting to her father– no. This was not her father.

Cassidy’s mouth drew back in a snarl as he stared at the bigger tom. “What did you do?” He yowled in terror and anger. Vanessa saw a flash of golden fur as William smacked her brother across the face with his left paw, claws still unsheathed and blood dripping down them. Cassidy let out a choked sob, recoiling away as blood filled his mouth.

“Keep your muzzle shut,” he growled, baring his teeth at them. “You’re going to help me clean this mess up.”

Vanessa could not recognize her father. The bloody, crazed cat before her was not the loving and kind dad she’d known. “N-no!” She sobbed, choking out the word between her teeth. Cassidy slapped his tail on her mouth, dragging himself in front of her. “She didn’t mean that Dad, please,” he pleaded, tears streaming down his face.

William stepped closer towards the cowering kits, his eyes narrowed, shining menacingly. “Step aside,” he snarled, glaring icily at Cassidy as he flexed his claws.

“I won’t let you hurt her, too!”

The large tom darted forward, his claws ripping down her brother’s left side of his face, clipping his ear and clawing his eye. Cassidy winced, but he did not budge, determination filling him as he stood his ground, blood rushing down the side of his face. Adrenaline flowed through his veins as he shook in anger, blinded in one eye.

“Did you do this to mom too?”

Cassidy spat, lashing his tail as he glared at his father in fury and pain. This was the final straw for the bloody golden tom. He raised his paw and, to a shout of horror from Vanessa, brought it down onto the small kit, slashing his neck. William coldly raised his head, glaring at his daughter with those blueish-purple eyes.

“This is all your fault.”

Vanessa scrambled back, staring at her brother’s limp and broken body on the ground, feeling more bile rise in her throat as she sobbed. This isn’t real, this isn’t real, she repeated over and over in her mind, covering her mouth with her left paw. Please, please wake up… He- he’s not really dead…

“Vanessa.”

The kit wailed softly as tears fell numbly down her face, unable to take her eyes off her brother’s small frame, her paws frozen to the ground. William noticed this, glaring down disgustedly at his son’s body, taking the small kit’s tail in his teeth. Audible crunching and cracking noises could be heard as he bit down, making Vanessa flinch. With a swift motion, her father jerked his head, ripping most of his tail off.

“You don’t want to end up like your brother, do you, Vanny?”

Vanessa shook her head, sobbing as she tore her eyes away from her brother’s body, looking into William’s purple eyes as he stared down at her.

“Help me clean up the mess you created.”

❆ ❆ ❆

Be compliant.

After they were done, her father had returned to his normal self, his fur softening and flattening. He handed her her toy plane when they had passed by the table, patting her on the head.

“Good job, Vanny. I love you, okay?”

“I love you too, daddy.”

❆ ❆

Maybe one day the loving father she had known would return. The cat with those warm blue eyes, that warm smile, and comforting nuzzles. On and off again, he would come close, but it would never be the same. Vanessa had always walked on eggshells around her father. She’d known that if she stepped a hair out of line, she’d end up just like her brother. Broken and shattered. Dead. As Vanessa grew up, she knew he was capable of hurting her, and so she lay compliant. She became an EMT, to ‘make up’ for the blood on her paws, and to help others who have been injured. But of course, her father took away any control she had over her own life, ‘suggesting’ to her that she should become a police officer and twisting it for his gain, forcing her to cover up his crimes and clean up after him. Maybe one day she’ll move to another state and run away forever, to try to escape her father’s grasp. Vanessa knew she would never be free, harnessed to her father. He will always yank her back. She will never escape him, he will always find her. You don’t want to end up like your brother, do you, Vanny?

After Freddy’s had shut down because of the Missing Kits Incident, her father had trouble keeping intruders out of the place. After all, it was a high-tech building with valuable technology and games, at least for the time. He’d hired security guards, which he’d force Vanessa to ‘clean up’ if they got too close to discovering the truth of the place. Vanessa felt tied to the restaurant, unable to leave, unable to free herself from the abandoned pizzeria. She’d always go there, talking to the ghost kits– her former friends– comforting and listening to their sorrows. It was almost therapeutic for her, talking to her ghost friends and cleaning the suits. Cassidy was never there though. Her friends would talk about her brother, but he never appeared when she was there. Vanessa’s guilt never faded away from that day, shackled and chained to that horrific incident. They would never be free.

❆ ❆

Her father had told her of the newest security guard, Mike Schmidt. Of course, he reminded her of her duty, and she nodded dully. How many security guards have been killed at Freddy’s? Five… Ten… Vanessa couldn’t count how many dead cats’ blood had been on her paws. Their faces blurred together in a mushy mess in her mind, their names long gone and forgotten. Vanessa felt repulsed as she stared at her paws, feeling the layers of blood caked underneath her claws.

Vanessa went to Freddy’s to check in on the new security guard. It took half an hour and she suspected that the kits might have gotten to him, but he finally opened the door. She showed him around after treating the wound on his front leg, showing Mike the performance the animals would give if he pressed the showtime button and gave him the security guard badge.

“There. Now you’re official.”

Those words reminded her of the day shift guard that had worked at Freddy’s long ago. The brown she-cat was a friend of her father’s, so warm and kind towards her. She had given her the badge in the same way, saying those words, and had shown her the showtime button. What happened to her? What did he do to her?

❆ ❆

Stupid.

A group of cats had broken into Freddy’s because Mike had left one of the doors unlocked. Vanessa could never get used to the metallic scent of blood that filled her mouth as she mindlessly washed away the stains on the floor from the kits having attacked the cats. I should have made sure they were locked. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Her father had instructed her to stuff any cats that died at Freddy’s in the parts and services room. He’d deal with them later. Vanessa stared at one of the cats, one that had his face chewed apart, so desensitized to the horrific sight. One of the others, a red she-cat, had her body dismembered in half. She forced her feelings of guilt down as she dragged their bodies one by one to the instructed room, her ears pressed flat against her skull and tail low.

❆ ❆

Vanessa paid a visit to Mike’s house, informing him about the break-in. To her surprise, she saw a small kit with him, a tortoiseshell she-kit with matching amber eyes. Abby was her name. To her surprise, she found out Abby was his sister and sadness filled her as she was reminded of her brother. She’d filled Mike in about the break-in, and he suggested that they should take a visit down by the canal behind his house.

❆ ❆

“So, I used to have a brother. His name was Garrett. And when I was… about twelve. He was… he was taken. They never found the cat who did it– they never found my brother.”

Garrett. The name was engraved into her mind as a flash of recognition flashed in her blue eyes. She quickly hid it as she heard Mike continue his story, telling her of the dream he makes himself recount at night, silently repeating the name over and over, thinking of her toy plane that lay on one of her shelves in her bedroom. The G that had been scratched into the bottom before it faded away over time. Of course, her father had killed him. Of course, he had single handedly destroyed Mike’s whole family, with his father leaving, and his mother dying.

❆ ❆

Vanessa eyed the drawing of the five kits playing with the yellow rabbit on the wall. She remembered the day she’d drawn it, bile rising in her throat as she could only stare in horror, her ears flattened as the guilt prickled her pelt once more.

Vanessa’s ears perked up as she heard Mike unlock the door. “Guys, I’m back! Hey, Vanessa!” A small voice yipped in excitement behind her. She turned around, spotting the tortoiseshell kit bounding around, going towards the stage. Horror and dread dawned on Vanessa as she realized Abby was here. She’s going to be killed. Father- he’s… I can’t let this happen. Not again. She thought, staring at Mike, regaining her composure as frustration rose beneath her fur.

❆ ❆

The cream-colored she-cat rose to her paws as she padded towards the back room to get tablecloths for Abby’s fort, Mike following after her. She didn’t say anything, keeping her muzzle shut, going back to the same room she’d lost everything in. The familiar scent of blood flooded her senses, even though there was none. Vanessa gagged but continued her task, grabbing some tablecloths in her mouth. Mike then walked over to a humanoid suit, unlike the animal suits those kits were in, that her father had also made, tentatively reaching out to touch the exposed springlocks. Vanessa yelped in horror as she spotted what he was doing, dropping the tablecloths, completely losing her composure for a split second, yowling “Don’t!”, her ears pressed flat against her head. She shook her pelt as she regained her composure, her blue eyes wide as Mike stopped in his tracks. “I wouldn’t do that. They’re springlocks. They tend to be pretty unstable.” Vanessa explained, her voice low. “Let’s see.”

Vanessa took the middle of a broom in her teeth, jabbing the handle into the suit, wincing as it snapped the broomstick into pieces. She saw fear, surprise, and suspicion flash across Mike’s face as she turned to face him, dropping the broom.

“As I said, unstable.”

Mike paused for a moment, flicking his ear as he stared at Vanessa, the growing suspicion rising in his pelt. “Is there anything else you want to tell me about, Vanessa?” He asked slowly. “Since you seem to know everything about this place.” Vanessa studied him, her mouth slightly open to file back a retort, seeing the hackles rising on his back as more anger and suspicion grew on the security guard’s face. “And what if Abby had come in here? What if she’d found that thing?” The brown tabby tom’s voice rose higher, nodding his head towards the suit.

“You’re the one who brought her Mike, not me.” Vanessa countered, her voice low and shaky, lashing her tail in frustration. He’s not listening! “What I still can’t wrap my head around is why.”

Mike shifted his gaze towards the ground, deep in thought on whether to tell her or not. He then explained to Vanessa how his dreams were more vivid and how he felt closer to finding his brother just by being here.

Mike has to stop this. Abby- him- they’re both going to be killed!

“Mike, you need to drop this.”

“Honestly, I don’t really see how it’s any of your business.”

In a flash of cream fur, Vanessa closed most of the gap between her and Mike, anger boiling in her as she drew her mouth into a snarl. “I’m telling you to let. It. Go.” She recoiled away slightly in shock, shrinking inwards as she quickly moved back in a flash, staring at the floor, her pelt hot with embarrassment, turning her back on Mike.

“Who the hell are you?”

“Someone…” Vanessa said softly, in an almost kit-like voice. “Someone who’s trying to help.” She stumbled slightly as she stiffly strode away after she had picked up the tablecloths again.

Vanessa wiped away the tears that had welled up in her eyes with the back of her paw as she walked away from the storage room, her back on Mike as she tried so hard to shove her feelings back down and force her fur to lay flat again. Her anger had gotten to the best of her. You’re just like your father.

“Vanessa, wait!

Vanessa flinched as Mike caught up to her, tugging on her foreleg, facing him.

“Talk to me.”

She wiped her eyes again, looking away. “I’m trying— you’re not listening.”

“Please. Finding the guy who did this is the only thing that matters to me,” Mike meowed, staring at her.

“You… you don’t understand.” Vanessa shook her head, glancing at the children’s drawings, frowning.

“Then explain it to me!”

Vanessa opened her mouth before closing it again, closing her eyes as she shook her head.

❆ ❆

Abby had gotten hurt. And it was her fault.

Vanessa knew Jeremy had not meant to hurt her, but she knew Je- Bonnie’s– the name made her sick, erasing the name of the kit she’d once known– guitar had malfunctioned earlier on Mike’s first night… Why couldn’t she have warned the kit sooner? Why couldn’t she have stopped her?

“Go home, Mike. Take care of your sister.”

“What are you so afraid of? In the storage room… I saw your eyes. You were terrified.”

❆ ❆

She had found Mike’s unconscious body just outside of one of Freddy’s and she’d taken him to the police supply outpost, patching him up. The kits had given him so many wounds and injuries, controlled by her father. His brown fur had been soaked in his blood when she’d found his limp and battered body. She heard him stirring awake and walked back into the room. “Careful,” Vanessa meowed as he got to his paws, wincing in pain.

“Where are we?”

“Police supply outpost. I found you and you… you were… badly hurt.”

“They tried to kill me, Vanessa.” Mike stared at her with his amber eyes, the she-cat dropping her head as she averted her gaze.

“But I’m guessing you already knew that. Max. Her brother. And the other men. Did you know about them, too?”

Vanessa opened her mouth as she lifted her head, looking at Mike’s amber eyes with her tear-filled blue ones. “...It’s… It’s complicated.” She mewed softly after a few moments.

“Complicated? More complicated than a bunch of ghost kits murdering innocent cats?”

“They- they weren’t innocent!”

“Well, Abby is!”

Vanessa shrank away, staring at the ground as her eyes swam in tears, flinching away every time Mike would raise his voice.

“You saw her play with those things. You knew what they were capable of, and you didn’t say anything.” Mike spat in anger, stepping forward. Vanessa took two steps back. “Mike– please– just—”

“Abby’s in danger!”

Vanessa took a deep, shuddering breath, trying to calm down. “…Tell me what happened.”

Mike paused for a moment, staring at the ground. “In my dream, they wanted Abby. And I… gave her to them. It was a mistake, and when I tried to fix it…” Mike raised his gaze towards Vanessa. “What do they want with my sister?”

Vanessa shifted her eyes, not answering his question for a few minutes as she took in deep breaths.

“They want to make her… like them.”

She shifted on her paws as she paced back and forth, a dark look on her face as she grimaced.

“In the ‘80s, when those kits went missing… The police searched every inch of Freddy’s, from top to bottom. But… they never found them. The man who took them… he was… a very bad man. A very… cruel man.”

Vanessa knew she was visibly trembling, her voice shaky and soft. She didn’t care, wiping her eyes once more with the back of her paw. He’s going to kill me. What will he do if he finds- no, he will find out. I’m going to end up just like my brother.

“Also a very clever man… He knew the parents would cry and the police would come looking. He knew there was one place that the police would never think to check. Because… why would they?”

She raised her head to face Mike. “Why would anyone?”

❆ ❆

Vanessa felt like a little kit again, her head hung low and slightly tilted to the side, a weak smile on her face. “You have to understand… the kits.. The kits don’t want to hurt anyone, It’s him. He influences them somehow.”

“Who?”

“It’s not their fault!” Vanessa was almost pleading, urgency in her voice. “They were scared and alone, and they didn’t know any better. You have to believe me.” The words were like a double-edged sword. She wasn’t just talking about the kits.

It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t know any better.

The she-cat shrank inwards towards herself, hot tears streaming down her face. She was shaking badly, backing away from Mike, consumed in her pain and sorrow. “He took everything from them that they don’t remember.“

“Who, Vanessa?”

“I tried to warn you… I really did try. But it– it’s too late now. He knows you’re looking for him.”

“You need to tell me who he is.”

Vanessa looked away, her vision blurred with the incredible amount of tears that fell down her face. I’m going to die. I’m going to get hurt. I’m going to end up like Cassidy. Thoughts raced through her head, echoing over and over as she held back her sobs.

“His name… is William Afton.” Vanessa could barely choke her words out, closing her eyes, still not meeting Mike’s amber eyes. A bright light shone above her head as she sat on her hindquarters.

“He’s my father.”

❆ ❆

Vanessa held a piece of paper in her paw, sliding it towards Mike. She knew he wouldn’t be happy seeing what was in the photo. It was her, as a kit, almost 6 moons old, holding the toy plane her father had given– had murdered Garrett to give to her in her jaws, with a big yellow rabbit beside the small kit. How many kits had been killed, had been robbed of their belongings, just to give to her? How many?

Mike took a step back as he dropped the photo to the ground, lifting his head to look at Vanessa.

“You… knew.”

“Mike…”

“You knew? This whole time. My brother, you knew.”

Vanessa shook her head, lowering her eyes as she shifted on her paws. “N-not about Garrett, no. At least… not when we met.” Please. “I’m so, so sorry…”

“Tell me how to stop them. Tell me how to save my sister!”

Like a kicked dog, Vanessa shrank even more, her teary blue eyes so wide as she quavered, telling him how to deactivate the suits but that it was only temporary.

“Come with me. You owe it to me and you owe it to them.”

No, I can’t. I can’t- Please.

Vanessa stumbled on her paws as she backed away from the brown tabby, shaking her head violently. “I- I can’t. If… if he’s there… I…” She weakly murmured as tears rolled down her cheeks. A thud came from behind her as she slumped against the wall, sinking in her paws. “I won’t be any use to you, believe me.” Use. She’d always had to prove her usefulness to her father. She had to be useful, otherwise, he’d kill her, disposing of and throwing away his toy once she’s lost her usefulness. Vanessa silently sobbed, her mouth drawn back, her eyes swimming in her tears. I know what crazy looks like, Mike.

“He really messed you up, didn’t he?”

❆ ❆

Vanessa heard Mike’s paw steps leave the police supply outpost and the sobs she had suppressed spilled out of her mouth, filling the room. They echoed back at her, almost mockingly, taunting her as she sank to the floor, collapsing, burying her head into her paws. She was supposed to be a good girl. She was supposed to obey her father.

What was a broken dog to its master? Useless. One that needed to be put down.

Even now, Vanessa could feel his piercing, icy blueish-purple eyes glaring at her in the shadows, feeling as if he was there. As if he was over her shoulder, his dagger-like eyes stabbing into Vanessa’s fur, trained on her, watching her every move. She could taste the sickly scent of blood and death again, the scent emanating from him.

❆ ❆

What did she have to lose anyway? She’d lost everything. Her father, her brother, her friends. She had to save Abby and Mike. She had to stop him from hurting anyone ever again. Maybe that’ll make up for the things she’s done.

Vanessa got to her paws, wobbling slightly as she closed her eyes. She shook her fur out, wiping the tears that stained her face with her right paw, taking shuddering breaths and walking out of the building.

❆ ㅤ

“I need to go get you somewhere safe so I can help your brother, okay?”

Vanessa watched as the tortoiseshell kit scrambled away to hide, looking so much like herself as a kit. She closed her eyes, getting on her paws, padding towards where Mike and William were, sealing her fate, the hands of death clamping around her.

Abby’s said brother was lying limply on the ground, blood running down the left side of his head, covering his eye as he lay there, unconscious. She watched as her father— the yellow rabbit— raised his right paw, his claws catching in the light. “Farewell, Michael Schmidt.”

A rush of adrenaline kicked in as she drew her lips back in a snarl, unsheathing her claws, trembling.

“That’s enough!”

The yellow rabbit paused, slowly lowering his paw that hung dreadfully over Mike’s body.

“A little old for temper tantrums…” The rabbit turned, changing back into her father. Vanessa shook even harder at the sight of him. “…aren’t we, Vanessa?”

Death and blood reeked from the cat before her as she felt bile rising in her throat.

“I’m not kidding, Dad.”

William pointed a claw at her as he sneered. “You may have forgotten your loyalties, but I assure you, they—“ He nodded towards the stage, where Bonnie and Freddy stood watching. “—have not.”

“Mike!”

Vanessa stared in horror as Abby ran out of her hiding spot, bounding towards her brother’s unconscious body. “Please, wake up!” Abby mewed as she tried shaking Mike, but to no avail.

“Now… help me clean up the mess that you created!”

“Please, please Mike, please…”

She could only watch the sight of Abby pleading for her brother to wake up, unable to meet her father’s piercing eyes, her body trembling even more.

“Oh come on… we both know you won't—“

Vanessa darted forward, slashing at his chest. It took out a few tufts of fur, but didn’t do anything to stop him. In fact, it made him much, much angrier. Bonnie and Freddy flickered for a second, appearing to be the ghosts of Jeremy and Gabriel before the kits changed back to the blue rabbit and the brown bear.

Don’t disobey him.

Her father charged at her, baring his teeth, reeking of that awful scent. He jabbed his claws at her chest. She flinched as he got so close to stabbing her, but still holding his gaze. “You had one job, one! Keep them in the dark, and kill them if they got too close.”

A flare of resistance welled up inside of her as she spat, “That’s two jobs,” lashing her tail.

Her father grabbed her by the throat, wrapping his left paw around her neck, his claws digging into her fur. Before she had a chance to react, he slammed her into the claw machine behind her. Vanessa let out a yelp of pain, gasping for air as his hold tightened around her throat, thrashing weakly in his paws. Her eyes filled with tears as she looked up at her father’s purple eyes, her ears pressed flat against her skull, looking like a wounded and cornered dog. “Dad…”

He didn’t budge, tightening his grip around her throat, snarling. Vanessa could barely breathe. Then, suddenly, Vanessa saw that something caught his eye as he turned, his mouth slightly agape. He dropped her onto the ground, and she hit the floor with a crack. She weakly raised her head, turning to see what he’d seen.

It was Abby, carrying a drawing in her mouth. She had gone up to the wall that was full of kits’ drawings from back when Freddy’s was open. The kit tore the drawing Vanessa had made so long ago off the wall, and Vanessa watched her father take a step towards the tortoiseshell kit.

No, stop! I can’t- Abby can’t get hurt.

With a surge of energy, she grabbed onto her father’s right hind leg, wrapping her paws around it.

“No!”

“Let go!” He snarled, lashing his tail in anger. Her father grabbed her once more, lifting her up as her paws flopped in the air. With a flash, he dove his head down onto her neck, sinking his fangs into her fur.

Vanessa’s face turned pale as she felt thick, coppery liquid fill her mouth, She let out a short gasp, staring at her father.

I have to make this worth it.

Her father grunted as he tried tugging away, but Vanessa wrapped her forelegs around him. She wouldn’t let go. She couldn’t let go.

“I won’t let you hurt her, too.”

❆ ㅤ

She’d always known it’d end up this way. One fess up and she’d end up like her brother. She was shacked, harnessed to her father’s paw. Every time she’d try to escape, he’d find her. He’d tug on her leash, her chains, and send her back to him once more.

Vanessa struggled under William’s grip as she tightened her wrap around his neck, almost like a hug. I love you, Vanny. She could barely hear the roar of anger that came from his mouth as the action had made him sink his teeth deeper into her throat, the cry rippling through her fur. Black spots started to dot her vision as her face grew paler and paler, blood flooding out of the neck wounds he had given her. He beat at Vanessa’s back, clawing tufts of fur out in frustration, but Vanessa wouldn’t relent.

I love you too, Dad.

She could feel her strength sapping as her grip grew looser around her father’s neck. Her body was slick and coated in red, blood dripping down her father’s mouth and flowing from her wound. Vanessa’s arms started to drop away from him, her face now a stark white. “I’m sorry, Daddy,” she weakly mewed like a little kit, her eyes glazed over in pain, tears streaming down her face.

“Get off me!”

William ripped his head out of Vanessa’s neck, blood splattering his face as he grabbed her tail in his teeth, a loud crack sounding out as he flung his daughter to the side, spitting out the bloody fur he had in his mouth. Vanessa felt a blinding sear of pain as she heard the sound, losing her sense of balance. She collapsed onto the ground, pressing her right paw against her neck to try to stop the bleeding, coughing up the hot iron-tasting liquid, blood pooling beneath her.

Is this what love is?

Her vision flickered as her eyes grew heavy, feeling pain everywhere in her pelt, slipping in and out of unconsciousness.

Vanessa slid her paw away from her neck.

~

@send-me-a-puffalope HERE IT IS!!!

KILLS MYSELF <333 I’M SO PROUD OF THIS FIC SCSHCSOHVSHOVS

i finished it a few hours ago but was scared to post it 💀

constructive criticism is appreciated!!

[messymindofmine]

I find it kind of strange how this fandom often deifies Gabriel and Andrea but vilifies Owen. I get that we don’t see as much of Gabriel and Andrea as we do of Owen and Owen as a character is very flawed but still. I get being frustrated with the amount of screentime Owen gets but I still think that a lot of what we see of Owen is interesting. Particularly in s3. That said, we know from Carlos himself that his parents are not perfect. While they obviously do love and accept him, Gabriel is shown as being very hard on Carlos about him being too soft. This has clearly left a mark on Carlos especially since his parents never bothered to have a conversation about him being gay the way Carlos wanted too. The way Gabriel went after Carlos in 2x08 was actually very revealing. He didn’t even really listen to Carlos’s side of things and just put the blame on him. Then when Carlos was proven right, he didn’t even acknowledge it. When Carlos brought it up (something I suspect he wouldn’t have done before he met TK), Gabriel brushed him off. Even the hug between them didn’t really feel affectionate at all. Andrea isn’t innocent either. She may not have been as harsh but she clearly didn’t stand up for Carlos either. It rubs me the wrong way when people say that they wanted to see Andrea give TK a shovel talk in s3. First off, Carlos is an adult. Second, TK had his reasons that were completely understandable and it’s unfair to minimize them like that. Third, if I were Andrea and I wanted to earn my son’s trust, I wouldn’t be concerned about giving his bedridden boyfriend a shovel talk. I would focus more on working on myself so that my son feels comfortable telling me things. There is a reason Carlos didn’t tell his parents. I know they had a nice talk in the hospital but one talk isn’t going to erase a lifetime’s worth of trauma. and we have yet to see them really acknowledge their mistakes. In fact, Gabriel even casually gaslit Carlos by saying he should have corrected Andrea about getting TK’s name wrong. I’m sure it wasn’t intentional but unintentional gaslighting is a thing and that comment was definitely it. He clearly never stopped to think about how his own behavior might have led to Carlos not feeling comfortable enough to make the correction. It’s clear that even after 2x08, Gabriel still didn’t recognize how his behavior affected Carlos. The fact that he knew TK was Carlos’s boyfriend and didn’t say anything also shows that, Sure he said he was sure he’s like TK bc his son has great instincts but given how deep Carlos’s trauma goes, that alone isn’t enough. 

 Even if we see them mend things in s4, it’s unrealistic that Carlos will ever get to have the same type of relationship that TK does (or did) with his parents. Neither Gabriel or Andrea are those types of people and at this point it’s unrealistic to expect such a big change from them. The best Carlos can hope for is that his parents at least check themselves before making hurtful remarks, acknowledge their mistakes and make the effort to do better. I’m not saying that Gabriel and Andrea are bad people or that they don’t love Carlos but they have hurt Carlos in very big ways that they have yet to acknowledge. I hope they do so in s4.

By contrast, Owen (and Gwyn for that matter) are by no means perfect and have made mistakes that have affected TK a lot but TK also obviously has a far better relationship with both his parents than Carlos does with his. Even though Owen wasn’t around much after 9/11 (and you know what? I’m willing to go easy on him given the fact we’re talking about one of the most horrific events in modern history), him and TK have such a loving, affectionate relationship. How many adult sons do you see resting their head on their father’s shoulder especially in a public place?  That doesn’t just happen.

Gwyn is also not perfect. The turbulent relationship she had with Owen for so long clearly affected TK deeply. She also clearly had a habit of blaming Owen for things that she shouldn’t be blaming him for. Then there’s the fact that she apparently shacked up with Enzo three weeks after divorcing Owen. That could not have been easy for TK to deal with either. But she also walked into a drug den by herself, took her son onto a plane all the way to California to get him into rehab. She flew in from New York and stayed in Texas for months after TK was shot. Sure, her and Owen started up their messed up relationship again while she was there but she obviously didn’t come all the way to Texas for that. She did it for her son. There is a reason TK saw her in his dream in 3x04.

Owen is far from perfect himself but he actually does acknowledge his mistakes. Yeah, he didn’t react well in 1x09 when TK brought up how Owen not being their when he was a kid affected him but he also made sure TK knew that no matter what he did, Owen would always support him. Yeah, that comment about being a father sucked but he does acknowledge it was wrong and he regrets it. He also acknowledges his shortcoming in 3x16. He calls TK to tell him how much he loves him and that he’s proud of him and apologizes for being so distant. He also expresses the desire to be better. And let’s not forget that this man decided to uproot his whole life so that his son could have a fresh start. Seriously, he found his son almost dead after relapsing and OD’ing on the same day he found out he had lung cancer (as a result of being the sole survivor on an event that literally altered the course of history). Owen had no desire to move to leave the city he clearly loved and move to Texas. In fact, he turned the offer down at first. But then he chose to do so so that his son could get better in a new place. He didn’t keep his cancer secret bc he didn’t believe TK wasn’t strong. He did it bc he couldn’t handle the pain of TK knowing. Owen has always acknowledged how strong TK is. There has never been any doubt that he loves and supports TK. Let’s not forget that it was Owen who told Carlos that his softness was a good thing. There is a reason TK asked for his dad before he even opened his eyes in 1x09. No matter what, TK has never had a problem reaching out to his dad for comfort.

I’m not trying to pick sides here. I’m just saying that with all the “Bad Parent Owen Strand” fics out their that act like what they’re describing is canon all the while putting the Reyes’ on a pedestal, I would like people to remember that while Carlos is so afraid to let his parents down that he doesn’t even share his life with them, TK adores both his parents and has no problem teasing them about things. I’ll be honest, TK and Owen’s relationship is what drew me to the show to begin with. Their relationship is imperfect but the love they have for each other has never been in question. It bothers me when I see so many fics labeling Owen a bad parent and yet putting the Reyes’ on such a high pedestal when I would make the argument that TK (for all his trauma) has been far less traumatized by anything Owen has ever done than Carlos has been by his parents.

[night-market-if]

How would the ROs feel about an MC who likes eskimo kisses a lot? Like they'd get the chance to do it to them wherever they can.

Milo and Hazel I feel would love that more than anything. I can just see both of heir scrunchy little smiles.

Malcolm would tolerate it because he would think its cute but he would roll his eyes at the MC affectionately.

Gabriel would get nervous every single time because he would have no idea what the MC was doing.

Belladonna would hate it. Like truly hate it. LOL

[ravenadottir]

naming characters from s5

now listen, i never played the season and don't know their names, so i thought it would be fun if my partner saved the pictures and i would name them in the dark! feel free to add because honestly there's definitely culture shock when it comes to names since i'm not american or european, so a name that sounds good to me might not sound good for y'all lol

like gary, i didn't think it was a bad name and then found out people think it's an old guy name ??? anyway, here are my guesses/names for season 5 characters:

so bland looking, jesus christ! why is he sleepy here? is this his standard self? anyway! he looks like a jordan to me, because honestly jordan is a bland ass name and it fits right in!

she's anaís (anah-ees), look at those eyes! magical! she's gorgeous and deserves a name on the same level. also, is she an li? 'cause i would be so down for her!

she's giving "i'm pretty and i know it, i'm also composed and my name starts with a D", so i'm naming her deena. she's really hot, love the blonde hair for her!

oh... can we talk to the designers and ask what the thought process was with this one? why does he look like a dad in gossip girl?? anyway, generic guy asks for generic name, and i thought of eddie or tommy, but i know there's a tom in s4 (?) so... eddie is a good one. although, his face alone is giving nordic, so i'm naming him viggo.

alright, much better, this is definitely more my style! i would name him flynn, because one, white, two, red hair, and three, flynn rider, and he also looks like a smug little shit (affectionate).

the personification of my dream girl... but not quite because she's pixels, but still! oh my god, if she's not an li you should ask for a refund! i feel like she fits with a small but impactful name, like quinn, so that's what i would name her.

wait, so minors can apply for the show now? it's giving kindergarten, i'm sorry! cody and noel made so much fun of bobby but look at this small little child! he's definitely an evan, because he looks 14 and the adolescent vibes are there.

HAVE YOU SEEN A KATRINA MORE KATRINA THAN THIS KATRINA???? THIS - IS - A - KATRINA!

retro hair, probably vintage clothes, a bland of crochet and hemp... i actually have two names for her, because it's either mona or a name with a repeated syllable, like lala. the quirky vintage crochet girls are always a lala, or lulu, so i'm naming her lala.

this girl is giving isabella, or isadora, something that starts with -isa, but i believe isabella would fit in with her face. she's absolutely stunning, holy shit!

the designers did the boys dirty this season huh. i feel absolutely nothing for him, and it's kind of hard to find a name for someone that i feel so indifferent about, so like... gabriel, 'cause i feel nothing about the name either!

THIS CANNOT BE A REAL CHARACTER ON A REAL SEASON, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THIS ONE! they took the time and money to draw this??? he's the human version of a ransom note written with magazine cutouts! like, every part of his face belongs to a different design, i can't!! i'm naming him hugo because who the fuck is named hugo? the human ransom note!

i know this one! his name is suresh, i've seen him on my dash a few times last year, and he was very popular (?), so... i actually like this name for him, but i think i have one that suits him better: devaj (born from the gods);

((now the reason why i have some favorite names from different ethnicites and cultures is because i did a lot of research for an upcoming project, so there's indian, korean, chinese, japonese, spanish, among others. so when you see my favorites in the other posts, that's why))

[celestialcrowley]

Hi! For the fanfic author ask… 🥕, 🥨, 🍕, 🍔. Any and/or all! 🥰

Hi, @zeldamacgregor!

I chose some extra question for the any and/or all. One of those — the first one — took courage to include. 😁

🥝 Who are your literary influences, and have they shaped your own writing?

🪴 Neil Gaiman. Should I tag him? I’m going to tag him. @neil-gaiman. Oh, lord, heal this bike. I did it. I’ve been scared to — and to even pop in to say hi to him — because I’m a shy awkward bean, and he’s someone who very much inspires me. He’s a phenomenal writer, and — how do I say this? — my mother and I watched Good Omens, and because of how … anti … she is, I was honestly about to fly onto the ceiling during the Final Fifteen. She’s gone from outright stating she will not watch shows or movies involving anything LGBTQ+ to telling me that she wants to watch Good Omens again. She even raves to her friends about it. I’m not sure if you’ll see this, but thank you, Neil. You truly are a legend. Here’s to you, Sir Terry Pratchett and season three.🥂

🥕 What's your favorite fic you've written, and why?

🪴 Memory Reboot. It’s a WIP and my first multi chapter piece for the Good Omens fandom. To get to the fluff, we must first survive the angst. It’s my favorite mostly because of the original character I created that wasn’t actually supposed to be in the story. He was only intended to be an RP character, but here we are. Allow me to introduce you to Raven. A Nephalem. Half angel. Half demon. Writing him is a blast!

🥨 How do you overcome writer's block?

🪴 I honestly don’t know. 😂 Perhaps lurking about to see what other writers are up to in hopes of finding motivation or by rewatching Good Omens. Or being affectionately yelled at to write like Michael Sheen yelled DAVID WHAT HAS HAPPEN TO YOUR HAIR. Seriously. Do it. Haha.

🍕 What's your favorite comment you've received on a fic?

🪴 I can’t choose just one. There are too many.

🍔 What's a headcanon that hasn't made it into a published fic yet?

🪴 Ooh! I headcanon that Crowley might grumble about it, or at least never admit out loud — he might even pretend to hate it — but he would absolutely love to be held by Aziraphale. To have the angel run his fingers through his hair. To fall asleep in his arms and wake up in them as well. Why? Love. And also because the chaos demon pretty much short-circuited here…

And here…

Sorry, I’m awkward. I’ll shut up now.

🍭 What's been your most challenging story to write, and why?

🪴 Memory Reboot because *Gabriel voice* there’s a lot happening.

🍩 What advice would you give to aspiring writers?

🪴 Let’s see — there will be good days where the words will do the thing and bad days where they won’t do the thing. There might even come a day where you’re not happy with what you’ve written and want to scrap the whole thing. If that happens, take a break and do something else that you enjoy. Talk about it with your beta if you have one, or with someone else you feel comfortable sharing it with. Some fics or chapters may get more love than others, but don’t get discouraged. Don’t give up. Keep writing. 💚

[cherubchoirs]

How would they react to people hugging them?

oc hug list!!!

raphael - give him EVERY single hug you have, happy, sad, lonely, excited, ANYTHING. he would be hugging constantly if he could and he loves surprise hugs as well, doesn't matter!!! fallen raphael is still nearly as open for them, except when he really isn't feeling well ;~;

uriel - he's quite shy and often spends time alone, so he isn't very open for hugs since physical contact can make him uncomfortable. DEFINITELY never surprise him, but he can be up for receiving a hug if it's from someone he knows well (he won't initiate tho) fallen uriel would suggest no hugs, as he's overly warm already and catches on fire. quite a bit.

michael - while alive, mike was very uncomfortable with any display of affection and probably never hugged nor accepted any, despite still holding a lot of love in his heart for his family. now dead, he regrets not initiating more physical contact, and wishes he was able to feel a hug - but since he has no external sensation, he prefers not to be touched. besides, his discomfort with the state of his own body means he's highly uncomfortable with anyone touching him.

bonus canon characters hugs!!

gabriel - good with hugs and loves to receive them as well, though he never got much of a chance given his status and role assigned in heaven. this left him craving physical touch he rarely had, and now free of his position he takes more opportunities to hug. being fallen he's much the same, though he probably prefers them even more now with how cold he is. he could always use the warmth!

v1 - can ONLY be hugged by those it cares about, which is a tiny circle. however!!!! it has learned to greatly appreciate non-violent interaction, that it can receive and give affection without any pain passing between two parties. in other words: it and gabe hug. a lot. though that usually means v1 is half-climbing, half-hugging.

v2 - it's far more interested in touch than v1 is at a baseline, though it still isn't programmed much to give or receive such affectionate touches. because it knows it was trained with human models as well, it actually tends to stray away from initiating contact as doesn't want to mess with its softer feelings (no gabe!!! it will not keep you warm too!!!!)

ferryman - they certainly don't go out of their way to give hugs nor would they ever ask to receive one (and often don't think they deserve the contact), but they feel a lot of comfort in them when they get the opportunity. i think they absolutely would like to get more touches than they do though.