#i have a big fear of stinking so

[isatoru]

the concept of morning breath does not exist to blue lock men btw. they're all kissing you with tongue first thing in the morning and do not give a fuck. you say "at least let me brush my teeth first" or "at least brush your teeth first" and they're asking why lol ???

[chiscaralight]

Scaramouche x fatui! Harbinger reaader and reader is a higher rank than him.. Ive seen this a couple times before and it has me soaked everytime.

hehehehehhe nsfw balladeer!scara x reader. feels like i havent written for my stink in years. slight degradation?

this should be so embarrassing—it shouldn't even be happening. but why does it feel so good if it wasn't meant to be? why do you constantly find yourself wandering into his chambers in the dead of night so he can have his way with you? or more importantly, why was it so important today that you couldn't even wait for the moon to rise?

the reason will remain unknown to you, but the balladeer remains the answer. your front is pressed flat against his desk, bottom half completely exposed as he pounds into you with that sinister smile you don't even have to look back to see. shit, you're a higher rank than him, you should be the one bending him over! but with the way his cold fingers are pressing against the fat of your hips, dragging your body back into his as he hits that spot that makes you cry out his name with each thrust.

his speed is dizzying, and his grip on your hair is inhumane. the balladeer's lips are mere centimeters away from your ears, sickly spitting about how stupid you look going dumb on his cock. you're quick to oppose him in meetings and speak out on almost everything he lays down. but you take every single thrust he gives like it was your only purpose. such a big, bad harbinger like you getting their brain fucked out by someone lower ranked, what would your subordinates think, hm?

but his words hold no weight to you once his mouth finds your neck because you're already writhing from the pleasure of the bites he's adorning you with. he's freeing one of his hands to stretch it down, barely bumping his nimble fingers against your clit. your hand is flying towards his, desperately trying to get more touch out of him, but he only laughs. the fact you think you have any sort of power here is so amusing; pitiful actually.

"m-my lord! i was told to deliver some documents to you from Childe."

the voice behind the door is muffled by the thick wood, but the words are loud and clear. your eyes widen at the thought of seeing you like this, but the balladeer is faster. your face is being pressed into the material of his desk as his eyes meet yours and his voice is a low whisper.

"aww, are you scared of your subordinates seeing you so useless? what if I was to let him in and see you like this?"

you're not sure if the tears welling in your eyes are from how sensitive you're getting or the reputation riding on your head was about to be damaged, but the silent plea of your eyes is enough for him to barely bite back a smile. pure fear, that's one thing he doesn't get to see so much from you. so in exchange for this euphoric feeling you've given him, he'll spare you just this once.

"bring them back tomorrow. i'm busy."

"but my lord, the eleventh-"

"will the eleventh bring you back to life once i rid your body of life?"

"i-i will be back tomorrow, my lord."

the padding away of feet has your mouth opening in a relieved breath. but you're more concerned about why the man behind you has stilled his movements.

the balladeer is more than convinced that since he helped you such a great amount, you owe him something—a show. which is why he's leaned back on the large seat in his office with you completely bare, bouncing on him like some cheap whore. you're not sure what's more humiliating; the fact that he's still practically fully clothed or the shameless staring at you. eyes raking over your body as you move on top of him. your nails are digging into the fabric resting on his shoulders for balance, but the way his hands are holding your waist is more than enough to keep you in place.

but you are much too slow for his liking today, and he wants to pump you full as much as possible, as soon as possible. so he's almost throwing you down, pushing your leg up, and sliding back in with ease. his kiss is as harsh as he is, full of moans and tongues clashing, but it only fuels that heat in your belly as he picks up his pace. you're whining about how you need to cum, begging pathetically for your release. the only answer you get is rough circles to your clit once again as your eyes roll back, noises being silenced by the balladeer's other free hand pressing against your mouth. after all the stupid crying you do, you do absolutely nothing to actually try to shut the slightest bit up from your orgasm, so annoying.

he'll shake you awake, then tell you to fuck off from his office. you'll redress in silence and head for the door, but hell stop you just before you leave. before you can question, his lips are hot on yours once again, pressing your back against the wood as you slide your hands into his hair. you can swear you hear him groan as you grind your hips forward, but he'll pull back regardless. his fingers will adjust the collar of your shirt you can never seem to get right, then usher you out once the large hall is clear. he'll stare at the spot you just left, eyes practically burning holes in the carpet with a strong scowl on his face. he can still feel your skin against yours and it pisses him off. he misses it.

[fuctacles]

one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | nine | ten | eleven

extras: | 🐈 | 🐾 | 🐈 |

Eddie was lowkey disgusted by how his uncle would talk about one of his neighbors. No, he doesn't think it's bad for old people to fall in love or have crushes. But it's weird to know these things about his own uncle. 

And it's also sad to watch, because it's been months of Stephanie this, Stephanie that, and nothing came of it, so he felt safe to assume the infatuation was one-sided. So when he tells his uncle he can't go feed her cats that week, he figures it's for the best. And not only because of Wayne's twisted ankle. To his surprise though, he doesn't seem fazed; he just waves his hand and says:

"Yeah, yeah, I know. No climbing the stairs with this thing." He pokes the cast with his crutch. "I've already volunteered you anyway."

Eddie raises his eyebrows because he surely misheard that.

"You did what now?"

"Told Stephanie I'll send you to feed her cats," Wayne says, confirming his fears.

"Why?! She has so many other neighbors!" Eddie points out, gesturing vigorously around the room, implying but meaning the flats surrounding them. 

Wayne clicks his tongue at him.

"Would you let in just any of your neighbors into your home? She already trusts me, and I'm vouching for you."

Eddie gapes at him, hating that he's making a valid point. Damned be his old man and his reasonable thinking. He crosses his arms because while it makes sense, it doesn't mean Eddie can't be angry about it. 

"When?"

"She's visiting her friend this weekend so she asked for Saturday evening and Sunday morning. And stay with them for a while if possible, so they don't go crazy. Ah, and the plant in the kitchen needs watering."

"Great," Eddie grits through his teeth. He's so delighted at the prospect of spending time with some old lady's cats. The whole place probably stinks of cat piss and he'll definitely kill the plant as soon as he touches it. (It was his only superpower, which is not what he aimed for when his five-year-old had been praying, thanks for nothing, Jesus.) He just hopes he won't have to meet her. Hearing some old hag complain about his clothes, hair, and general adolescence was the last thing he wanted on his weekend off. But, alas...

"She asked you to come over tomorrow so she can show you where everything is."

Eddie groans. 

It's a Friday afternoon, he's at his uncle's taking a break from college and work. He should be sharing a beer with the old man, complaining about the coursework, the professors, and other students, not picking him up from the hospital, and running errands while his foot is in a cast. And certainly not meeting up with old stinky spinsters. 

To add insult to injury, Miss Stephanie, (which, by the way, is such a typical old hag name) lives two floors higher and the elevator is perpetually broken. Not too high, but high enough for Eddie's anemic lungs to start collapsing. 

He stops around the corner to steady his breath, because regardless of his overall attitude, he didn't want to worsen the first impression. He already refused to 'dress like a decent man' and didn't want to wheeze into the lady's face on top of it. 

Once his lungs are functioning properly again, he walks into the hallway, looking for number 54 as Wayne instructed. He knocks on the door, hoping he didn't mess it up and is at the right place. What if it was 45?

It must have been because he was told Stephanie Harrington lives alone. 

"Uh, sorry, I must have��"

"Are you Eddie?" The woman who opened the door takes him in. At her feet, a tabby cat peers curiously at the new human.

"Uh, yeah? I'm looking for Miss Stephanie?" he offers awkwardly. Maybe that's the friend? Or a sister?

But the woman extends her hand and smiles brightly.

"That would be me, but please call me Steph. I wish I could drill that into Wayne's thick skull." She rolls her eyes fondly.

Her big, gorgeous eyes, framed by thick lashes. She's not an old hag, she could be in her forties at best. She's tall and curvy and her hair looks straight out of a shampoo commercial. She's gorgeous. Eddie shakes her hand in a daze.

"Hi," he croaks as he's ushered inside. 

"Come in, come in! I've heard so much about you, it's great to finally see you in person. I must say," she turns around and gives him a quick once-over. "Wayne's stories didn't do you justice."

Did she just check him out?

Eddie clears his throat, suddenly dry like his elbows during winter.

"Uh, same to you."

"Yeah?" She puts her hands on her hips, raising an eyebrow. "What does he say about me?"

"Good things only," Eddie assures her. 

"So you're saying I'm a bitch." She squints at him.

"No!" His eyes widen. "What?!" 

"Well, if he's saying only good things about me, and you say they don't describe me right..." 

Eddie gets the point she's making and quickly shakes his head.

"No, he just made you sound like a crazy old cat lady, and you're..." He waves his hand uselessly. "Not that."

She sighs softly, shoulders sagging a little. It would be easy to miss but Eddie's senses are heightened after his fuck up.

"I kinda am, though," she says with a shrug. 

Eddie feels the need to reassure her somehow.

"Well, you're not eighty and your place doesn't smell like cat litter, I think you're fine."

She barks a laugh, it's low and surprised and Eddie's cheeks are red because he's just digging further into the hole he's in, isn't he?

"Good to know the bar is so low."

Eddie groans, tired of doing damage control that's not controlling anything.

"I'm gonna shut up now."

"Please don't." Steph smiles wide and teasingly. "You're a funny one. Just like your uncle told me."

Eddie scoffs. He's going to have a word or two with the old man once he's back.

"Great, this is exactly the impression I was hoping to make."

At his words, the woman eyes him up and down again, and he can feel his cheeks heating up.

"Yeah? Not as the local punk satanist?" she teases, making Eddie bristle.

"Metalhead," he corrects instinctively and immediately winces.

"Ah, my bad. I'm not good at the subcultures thing." She smiles apologetically but it doesn't read well with how clearly amused she is. "Anyway, here's the plant I want you to water tomorrow evening. Just like, half a glass."

Right. Plants. Cats. He came here on a mission.

"Come on, I'll show you my cats."

There's only three of them and they come rushing from all corners of the flat at the rustle of a catnip bag. Eddie never saw high cats so he's glad to have this opportunity now. Stephanie points to the tabby he saw earlier.

"This is Dart, she's not actually mine, but my friend couldn't keep her at the dorms. This is Garfield," she points to the orange cat, making Eddie huff a laugh. She grins. "Yeah, don't tell anyone, but he's my favorite," she whispers, to which Eddie mimics zipping his mouth shut. 

Lastly, she points to the black cat rolling on the carpet. 

"And this is Arwen."

Eddie frowns.

"Like, The Lord of the Rings Arwen?"

"Yeah," Steph sighs. "Dustin named her. He's the friend I've mentioned. Dart is short for D'Artagnan and I've fought teeth and nail for Garfield not to be called Pippin."

"Pippin is a great name, though," Eddie points out.

"Maybe," she huffs, crossing her arms. "But I wanted one for myself, okay? Not everything has to be about Dustin."

"Is Dustin like, your brother or something?" 

"Kinda?" She frowns. "We're not actually related but I babysat him, and then we became friends. He just stuck around, somehow." The words sound angry but her face betrays the fondness she has for her friends. 

"That's nice," he offers. "I'm an only child, never met any cousins, and only ever had friends my age."

"Well, good for you. Maybe if I had friends my age I wouldn't be living alone with a bunch of cats."

Eddie frowns. 

"Hey, now..."

She cuts him off with a dismissive wave of her hand. 

"I'll show you where the food is." 

Eddie's in a daze when he comes back downstairs, only realizing his visit ended when he's standing in his uncle's living room. He's been gone for only half an hour but it feels longer. 

"How did it go?" his uncle asks, pulling him out of his reverie. 

Edie turns to him and blinks, fighting the cotton around his brain.

"Fine?" he offers. "She's not as old as I expected," he admits bluntly. His uncle snorts.

"What, just because she lives alone with her cats you assumed she's on her deathbed?"

Eddie winces. It's exactly what he did.

"Well, the people in her life weren't kind to her, so now she relies on her pets. Nothing wrong with that." Wayne shrugs. 

"What do you mean?" Eddie frowns, curious. Concerned. He goes to the kitchen, not wanting to seem too eager to get an answer, and grabs a beer for himself and his uncle. He opens the junk drawer to find an opener and hears his uncle answer from the adjacent living room space. 

"She doesn't say much about it and I never asked, but she's always alone on the holidays. Her friends visit a few days before or after."

Eddie walks back in and hands his uncle the opened bottle. 

"Thanks, son."

He nods and settles heavily in an armchair. Focusing his gaze on the label peeling off of his beer, he hums thoughtfully.

"No family?"

"Seems so." Wayne nods solemnly. "I think it was a conflict of lifestyle choices, but I'll be honest, I'm basing it off of rumors and my own assumptions." He scratches his cheek, frowning at the wall. "It's not my place to pry, though I offered to hear her out if she ever felt like needing an ear." He sighs. "I'm just trying to be a good neighbor. Invited her for dinner over Thanksgiving, when you couldn't come. I was surprised she's into basketball," he muses. 

Eddie was seeking answers and now was even more confused.

"You invited Miss Stephanie. For a dinner?" He raised his eyebrows. 

"Yes. She was alone, I was alone, figured I could at least ask. I'm still surprised she agreed. She declined all my other offers."

"Wow." A teasing smile creeps on his lips against his will. "You've been inviting a lot of women since I moved out?"

"Listen," Wayne takes on his stern voice and it takes all of Eddie's willpower not to cackle. He can see his uncle's mustache twitch. "Stephanie is a lovely lady, but she's way too young for an old man like me. And this old man is too old for romance anyway. Besides—" he cuts himself off like he realized he was saying too much. Which, of course, piques Eddie's curiosity. 

"Besides?"

Wayne shrugs.

"I don't think I'd ever be ready for someone like her."

Eddie makes a confused face. 

"The fuck does that mean?" he asks, irritated. 

"Rumors and speculations, son."

[peachysunrize]

[TANGERINE DREAMS]

summary: being stood up on his wedding day, Aemond’s life takes a turn for the worse. Heartbroken and humiliated, he finds unexpected help in Helaena’s childhood friend, who helps him move back into his family mansion. Summer cocktail parties and a long stay at the Targaryen residency, Aemond might let the girl who’s always been in his life make a home in his heart.

Tangerines, in general, symbolize prosperity, good luck and happiness. So if these delicious fruits appear in your dreams - whole or in the form of juice - it is usually very positive. A dream with tangerines expresses the desire and the possibility of progress and prosperity

word count: 5.2k+

warnings: angst & fluff! English isn’t my first language<3

a/n: loviessssss welcome to the first chap of my summer romance! I hope you love this as much as I do when I’m writing it! Reblogs & comments are most appreciated🥹🍊 and very special thank you to @namelesslosers for betaing this for me<33🩷

Dividers by @/firefly-graphics

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Updates: every Saturday!

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Chapter 1: runaway bride

He shouldn’t be stressed, should he? 

Everything is in the right place; groomsmen are standing behind him while fixing each other’s coats and reassuring him, bridesmaids are in front of him as they talk and giggle, the guests are whispering and the priest is tapping his fingers on his watch.

Alys is a few minutes late, but it’s just a few minutes, there’s nothing to worry about. Aemond knows she must be even more stressed than he is. It’s their big day after all and naturally, the bride is the more anxious one. Surely that’s true, right? But why are his fingers fidgeting with the hem of his coat uncontrollably, why is rocking on the ball of his feet? He can’t be that nervous.

He looks around, finding his mum biting her nails. She searches around the room, looking for someone, anyone, to come and tell her about her bride-to-be’s whereabouts. His eye finds Helaena, watching as she caresses the flower petals before meeting his gaze, smiling broadly at him. He smiles back, but it doesn’t reach his eyes to convince her he’s doing alright. He is alright, just a tad bit too stressed for everyone’s liking, especially Helaena who can sense his nerves buzzing with excitement and fear. 

The church Alicent chose for his wedding has been used by Targaryens for years and passed on for generations. The walls covered in royalty tapestries of mythical Valyrian gods have seen many weddings and unions, and now, they will see his wedding.

He sighs, wanting to run his fingers through his hair but remembering his hair is in a low bun and his Mum would kill him if he ruined his perfectly done hair. He sighs again, looking up at the ceiling, his brow furrowing in worry.

What is taking her so long? She should have been here ten minutes ago.

Aemond turns around and looks at Daeron, their eyes meeting for a brief second before his younger brother nods and walks to the corner of the hall before slipping out the door without any hesitation. 

“Don’t worry, brother, she’ll come around,” Aegon says, his breath stinking with the three glasses of champagne he’s had from the bar in the garden attached to the church grounds, where they will host the party.

“This isn’t another simple date she can be late to. This is our wedding, Aegon!” He exhales shakily, his voice barely above whispering.

He knows he is right, even Aegon knows he is right, but there is little they both can do. They need to wait for her to show up eventually. She will, won’t she? Of course she will, it was Alys who was too eager to marry, start a family, and take a step towards their shared dreams. She reassured him of his hesitation, and he agreed to do this with a heart full of love.

“Sir,” the priest calls him, “I’m needed for another ceremony in about an hour and the ride there will take a long—“

“She will come,” Aemond’s response is more of a reassurance to him than the priest, “you must have seen this more than us, Sir, the bride always shows up.”

“Yes, yes, my apologies,” the man nods his head, going back to do whatever he was doing before. 

With every second that passes and Alys doesn’t show up he grows more restless, beads of sweat forming on his hairline. Aemond is a closed-up person, not really used to showing his feelings and emotions outwardly, but now, he is tapping his foot on the ground while his eye swipes at the guests, finding his half-sister’s family behind his Mum — he averts his eye quickly. The last thing he needs is to get furious over his sister’s goblins.

“What is taking her so long?” He hears someone say from the guests, even their stupid gossip is not enough to distract them from how late the bride is. He is growing desperate at this point, the muscles in his shin are growing tired with how fast he is tapping his foot on the floor, his fingers can no longer fidget with his coat instead his nails are digging into his sweaty palm.

Please, please, Alys, just open this door… He thinks to himself before spotting Daeron sneaking inside the hall with you on your toe. He watches as the two of you make your way toward Helaena, whispering something in her ear before she and Daeron leap out of the hall in a second, catching everyone’s attention.

The hall grows noisier, and the hushed whispers turn into loud accusations and questions; “Where is the bride?”

“I have always known she was problematic!” 

“Eight years older? How scandalous!”

“How did Viserys Targaryen let his son marry her?”

“I have heard she has quite the reputation with men, always after their money—“

Now his hands are shaking, he hides them by locking them behind his back before he looks in front of him, trying to mask out the noise. Aemond catches your eye, watching as you give him a reassuring smile before taking slow steps towards him.

“Hey you.”

“Hey…” he replies as best as he can without his voice breaking, “you look beautiful.”

“So do you, little nerd!” You reach to fix his bowtie, trying to calm him down a bit, “not so little though, right? You’re getting married before me!”

“Yeah, I’m younger and I beat you to it,” he chuckles a little, silently thanking you for keeping a leash on his nerves.

It’s always been like this since the two of you remember. Growing up close to the Targaryens as Helaena’s kindergarten friend until now, you have grown to know each of the siblings like the back of your hand, especially Aemond who was a constant presence in your games with Helaena since he could walk — sometimes it feels like you are his best friend and not Helaena’s with how attentive you are to him. As much as he wishes for that to be true, he knows the bond you share with his sister is something so precious and special that no one can break it.

“Just so you wait, Aemond, you won’t be invited to my wedding when the time comes!” You tease him, trying to lighten his mood, reaching to fix a few strands of hair that have fallen out of his bun.

“That’s not fair—“

Everyone falls silent when the door is pushed open, revealing a heaving Daeron and a very anxious Helaena. You both turn around to look at the siblings, meeting them halfway with Aegon following you closely. 

“We…” Helaena starts, but she can’t talk. Something bad must have happened for her to be so speechless.

“What?” You ask gently, resting your hand on her shoulders in hopes of trying to get her to talk.

“We found Alys,” Daeron looks at Aemond with an unreadable expression, “but she…”

“Spit it out for fuck sake!” Aegon whispers through gritted teeth, his hand shoved in his pockets as he waits for Daeron to finish his sentence.

“She doesn’t want to get married,” Helaena blurts out, swallowing the lump in her throat as she looks at Aemond with sad sympathetic eyes.

“Hel, this is insane. Did she say it herself—“ you say, frowning slightly.

“Criston is holding her back from running away. There’s a car parked outside, I think—“

Aemond can’t listen to these words anymore, so he pushes past his siblings and you, jogging out of the church towards the attached garden, finding Cole and Alys tangled in a messy fight as she tries to escape from his grasp.

“Alys!” He yells her name, making the couple freeze, but in a second, she knees Cole in his stomach and runs past him, her long white dress drags across the grass as she bolts out of the gates too fast for Aemond to be able to catch up, and once he does, he watches the car leave.

The noises around him vanish, and all he can hear is the thumping of his pulse in his ears, and the sharp breaths he takes. The world around him seems to disappear, and his good eye follows the path the car is taking, his fingers are tingling, his chest rising and falling rapidly while he tries to regain his grip on himself.

He sighs, finally his senses coming back as he looks around him, finding you, his Mum, and his siblings running towards him. Aemond doesn’t wish to talk to anyone, he wants to stay invisible, for the world to swallow him whole and keep him away from the humiliation that is about to be unleashed on him.

“Darling—“

“Aemond—“

The group reaches him, Alicent cups his face in her warm hands as she looks at him with tears stinging her eyes. Aemond can see how devastated she is about him, how she desperately wants to say something and ease his pain but the words are lost in the air when she opens her mouth to utter them.

He reaches and holds her wrists gently, pressing her palms against his cheeks as they silently communicate their emotions — no words need to be said, they understand, Alicent understands his pain, and he knows that she would take it away if she could.

“We should tell the guests,” Aemond says before letting go of his Mum’s hands, striding past his siblings and you towards the salon attached to the church, finding many of the guests already there — his half-sister and her kids with a few other relatives.

He knows they are waiting to hear more of this mess just to taunt him and make his day worse. Everyone knows they are looking for one mistake from him and his family to ruin their reputation, and now, with Aemond Targaryen’s runaway bride, they must be ecstatic.

“What happened, nephew? We thought we were invited for a traditional wedding, but all we see is a lonely groom—“

The glare Aemond gives his uncle and nephews is enough for them to shut up. He tries to put up a strong front, head held high and hands folded behind his back, but if you squint you can see how his resolve is crumbling with each second that he spends in their presence.

He decides not to give in to their silly games and walks towards the bar before he snatches the pack of cigarettes on the stool, leaving the room without saying a word. His mind is foggy as he tries to walk past everyone, he is handling many things at the same time but the bitter and heavy feeling in his chest crushes his strength to process it.

The sound of chatter and gossip fades away as he walks through the back garden of the church; a few little benches and a fountain in the corner hidden from the eyes of the guests with a wisteria tree.

This area could have made a romantic core memory for Aemond and Alys if only things had gone differently…

With a deep sigh, he sits on the ground, his back against the fountain as he fiddles with his bow tie, undoing the first few buttons of his shirt, his coat falling on the ground next to him. He opens the pack of cigarettes, pulling one out before he reaches in his pants for a lighter — something he is sure you’d scold him for as you always do, teasing him lightheartedly about his obsession with lighters.

When he inhales the smoke, his mind gets clearer, and he can think a little better, but he is not sure if he would really like to do so. His ex-fiancé left him just a few minutes ago, and his mind fills with dreadful thoughts.

Was it him?

Was he too young for her? Too immature?

Did she change her mind because she loved someone else?

Was he too strict and selfish?

Was it really him who brought this on himself? On his family?

He blows out the smoke, resting his elbow on his knee as he reaches to untie his bun, his hair falling freely around his shoulders while the droplets of water land on the soft silver strands from the fountain.

It is the beginning of the summer, the spring chill of the weather is replaced with an increasing heat, the birds chipper and he can see the peachy hue of sunset in the sky from between the leaves of the tree.

He feels numb, a dull ache in his chest blooming as the reality hits him. Aemond takes another drag of his cigarette, throwing his head back, and letting his hair fall inside the water fountain. He sniffs, closing his eye to keep his tears from flowing down, the storm of his thoughts wrecking his mind once again.

He loves her, she was his everything from the start — his first kiss, first girlfriend, first fight. Alys was his everything, and now, she is nothing but a memory, a memory he wishes to wipe away quickly. 

How can you claim to love someone and leave them without any remorse? 

There is guilt and sadness, but mostly it’s the doubt and self-hatred that makes him want to sob. Many questions are swirling in his head about how he is the reason she has left. Maybe she was right about leaving him, no one would like to be the wife of a man who deals with heavy pain daily.

He takes another drag, relishing in the feeling of the soft evening breeze that kisses his heated skin, cooling him down a little. The smell of smoke grounds him in this world, making him forget about the mess that is probably happening in the church. He is sure his siblings and Mum are trying their best to talk to Alys’ relatives and other guests, explaining the situation in a hurry.

“Your suite must have cost thousands,” you say casually, announcing your presence as you walk with your long dress in hand, careful with how uneasy your heels feel on the soft grass, making your way to where he is sitting.

“Nothing compared to the decorations she ordered,” he scoffs, putting out his cigarette on the edge of the stone of the fountain before he straightens his neck and looks at you.

“Yeah, I saw them,” you sigh, fisting your skirt before sitting next to him, shoulders touching subtly, “she has a very… interesting taste. Who’d thought a lawyer would be into witchcraft?”

“She likes things no one can understand,” he says, gazing up at the wisteria tree, “I also paid for the dress you are getting wet grass stains on—“

“That was irrelevant because Hel bought it for me! She knew how much of an ass you’d be about it,” you chuckle a little, watching as a ghost of a smile finds its way to his face before it falters and his eye drops to the grass, the smile no longer visible.

“Yeah, maybe that’s why Alys left,” he scoffs in disbelief again, shaking his head a little as he thinks of every bad trait he has, considering all of them could be the reason she decided she was better off without him.

“Her loss,” you say softly, “you are too funny, little nerd, even for someone who can be a stuck-up ass sometimes.”

“You are lucky my sister loved you enough to keep you around because I’d get rid of you the second I could,” he mumbles, huffing out a small laugh when you punch his biceps playfully.

“That’s not nice, Aemond!” You laugh together, rubbing the place where you hit him, “You love me too, that’s why you will never get tired of me,” saying this, you can see his shoulder tensing — love, what a weird word to use. 

Does he love you? Does he even love anyone?

Maybe he does, but it wasn’t enough to keep his fiance with him.

Maybe his love was too much for Alys to bear.

“How did you find me?” He asks, his voice hoarse and thick, “I was trying to be invisible.”

“Give me that—“ you grab the pack of cigarettes from him, pulling one out and waiting for Aemond to light it for you. You inhale a puff, handing it back to him before looking up at the sky, “do you remember when you’d steal my books and go into your old stables to read?”

“I do, no one could find me,” he takes a drag of the cigarette, blowing out the smoke before he talks, “but you did.”

“I believed you would do it because you wanted someone to look for you,” you look at him with soft eyes, “and I always did. Your siblings had no idea where you would go, but I knew you like the back of my hand. Or maybe I just wanted my book back!”

He matches your smile, but you can see the pain in his eye, this is not a time to beat around the bush. He wishes to let it out — whatever it is. Perhaps it’s anger, frustration, betrayal, maybe it’s his ultimate desire to vanish into thin air to save himself from the press and humiliation that he’ll be going through.

“What did I do wrong?” He asks, and you must be able to see the agony he is in, he is in grave distress, and the cloud of doubt is causing a tornado in his head that will kill the remaining of his confidence, “did I not give her enough love, show her how much I wanted her?”

“You gave her your heart, something you would never do for someone you didn’t like,” you reach and squeeze his shoulder, “you did your best, gave her your everything. We all saw how devoted you were, it is not your fault.”

“Then why? Why?!” He asks desperately, looking at you with his wide teary eye, the ocean blue orb staring into your soul with need, “I thought I was everything she wanted, she said it herself—“ he looks away before he can cry, throwing his head back to stop the tears from falling, putting the cigarette between his thin lips.

“You are more than enough, Aemond—“

“She wasn’t worth it, was she?” He cuts you off, “she took me for granted,” he sounds so little, so fragile, and he feels so.

“You loved her! I’m sure, Aemond, that your love for her was so beautiful and precious, it was Alys who couldn’t be better.”

“She was the one who wanted to get married as soon as possible…” he whispers, closing his eye as he talks with the cigarette between his lips, “even Aegon made fun of me for not saying no to her, he said I needed to grow up and not give in to her whims.”

“Aegon is a little shit, he can’t even keep one girl in a one-month relationship. He should be the last person on earth to get advice from,” You nudge his shoulder, grab the cigarette, and pull it away from his lips, “loving your partner is not a crime. So what? You liked spoiling her, did you not?”

“Yeah, I did…” he says, looking back down at his fingers rubbing over the fabric of his pants, “Alys used to tell me I was a kid too, that I needed to grow up or else I wouldn’t be a good husband.”

“Oh, Aemond…”

He averts his gaze towards you, tears brimming in his eye, “I did everything I could,” he is helpless, the gut-wrenching feeling is eating him alive.

“Don’t bottle it up, little nerd,” you reach and push a few strands of his hair behind his ear, “you can cry, I’m here.”

And he does; he rests his head on your shoulder and starts sobbing quietly, tears falling on his scarred cheek.

“I’m here,” you whisper, wrapping your arm around his shoulders, making him feel safe enough to pour his emotions out.

Aemond has been avoiding the situation as best as he can; ignoring his grandfather’s calls, not leaving the house for a few weeks, and trying to get a hold on his life again.

All his efforts are in vain.

He still lives in the same apartment in Rosby he and Alys bought a few months ago, their photos and pictures hanging on the walls, the bed they used to sleep on together, their bathroom, their kitchen — everything feels like an old movie reel, a twilight zone he doesn’t know if he likes to leave or embrace and drown in it.

Aemond has been keeping contact with his siblings throughout the past week, refusing their help to come and live with him for a while, saying he wanted some time alone to figure out what he wished to do from then on.

The media is filled with pictures of him standing outside the garden catching the car speeding away — how the paparazzi get there? No one knows but the fingers are pointed at his half-sister and uncle. The pictures are all over the news and the internet, mainly using his Targaryen name to drag him into the dirt.

He plops down on the couch, unlocking his phone only to be greeted with thousands of texts from his Mum and Daeron, begging him to come home and stay the summer with them in Targaryen residency. It’s not an idea he hasn’t entertained before, in fact, he would like to go back home and take some time off for himself. So he texts Alicent and tells her he’ll move in with them for a while until he is better and ready to come back to this forsaken apartment.

He starts packing a few hours later, dirty clothes thrown into the washing machine while he sits on the floor with a huge suitcase ready to be filled. Suddenly his phone starts ringing, startling him greatly. He reaches for the phone on the bed, looking at the screen to see who’s calling him. You. Your name lights up his phone, making him smile a little, thinking probably the word has spread like wildfire.

“Hey,”

“Hey yourself, little nerd!” You say enthusiastically, “heard you wanna move back into your Mum’s place.”

“Hmm, yeah,” he sighs, securing the phone between his ear and shoulder as he talks to you, “a change would be nice, especially for the summer.”

“Then you’re in luck!” You reply, “Hel asked me to come and spend the summer at the mansion too!” he chuckles when he hears you groaning over who knows what before continuing, “Anyway, I’ll come to your place whenever you want so I can help you pack whatever you’d like to take there and then drive to King’s Landing.”

“Sounds great, I really appreciate the offer,” he agrees, grabbing the phone as soon as the washing machine stops, “I’d like it if you could take some time and come here tomorrow?”

“Of course, just send me the location, alright? The sooner we pack, the sooner we can have some of Aegon’s magnificent cocktails!”

“Urgh, that loser will be home too?” He feigns a groan, breaking character when he hears your snort.

“Stop being mean to him, he makes the best Sex on the Beach!” You both chuckle, knowing you are right, Aegon does make the best cocktails known to humankind, “We’ll have fun there, and I’ve missed Vhagar so much!”

“I missed her too,” Aemond says fondly, “thank you again for helping me out, I wouldn’t have reached out if you didn’t call me.”

“Oh I know, that’s why I called. You can always count on me! Anyway, I’ll come tomorrow and help you pack.”

“Alright, thank you, I’ll text you the address,” Aemond says, grabbing the basket to empty the wet clothes from the washing machine.

“See you tomorrow, Little nerd!”

“You should have told me you have a Chevy Camaro, I doubt we can fit anything in this little car!” you hug and greet him when he opens the door, “I brought my things too if it’s okay with you.”

“Yeah, sure, the sooner we pack, the sooner we can leave!” He replies, grabbing your suitcase’s handle, and leading you inside his apartment, “Don’t worry, my car has carried much larger things. This is nothing.”

“Whatever you say! Now— woah, you are packed already?” You look around the room, a few boxes neatly put on top of each other and labeled, one backpack and another half-filled suitcase on the floor.

“I just need some help with my clothes and whether I should…” he points at the framed photos on the walls, photos of him and Alys, “throw them out or send them to her with her belongings.”

“Well, I think you should give it some time before you do something you might regret,” you squeeze his shoulder lightly, “it seems we can go tonight, right? You don’t have many things left to pack.”

“Yeah, just a few clothes! You can get the snack while I put them in the suitcase—“

“No, no, lemme fold your clothes! You should start putting the boxes away, I’ll get everything ready,” you pat him on the chest, walking towards his bedroom to fold his clothes for him.

He nods silently and thanks you before he grabs the boxes and leaves the apartment. You both work quickly, taking a break and having tea together, you ask about how he’s holding up, and he dismisses your questions as best as he can, not really wishing to entertain the thoughts that’ll disturb him.

“Aemond, do you want to bring your books too?” You ask him, groaning as you drop the heavy box on his bed, “because I doubt we’ll have enough space to take all of these with us to King’s Landing.”

“Just those that are already tucked away!” He yells from the kitchen, finishing cooking for you, “We’ll finish it after dinner, c’mon.”

“Okay,” you sigh tiredly, not really expecting the packing to drag on for so long. After all, he said he only needed a few clothes, not half of his wardrobe with his expensive watches and sunglasses.

“I think we have packed enough for at least ten spontaneous parties Aegon will be throwing this summer,” you mutter, sitting behind the island in the kitchen.

“I doubt he’d let an occasion like my birthday let go so easily now that I’m back home,” Aemond shrugs, handing you a plate, “he mostly ignores the occasion but I’m sure he and Mum will do something, and make a huge deal out of it. That’s why I need to be prepared.”

“Well, it’s the first birthday in a while that I’m attending too so it better be something good!” You tease him, thanking him for the delicious meal.

“It will be, or at least Mum’s plans will be great. She has Daeron as her non-assigned assistant now that I’m gone and they make quite the duo. They always host the best gatherings together.”

“Alicent is a perfectionist, of course, she’ll be the best person to throw a birthday party for you,” you agree with him, “but you can’t deny that Aegon’s parties are always better! He’s reckless, and the drinks are the best.”

“Only the best for the oldest Targaryen son, right?” He sighs again, looking down at his plate, “Sorry, it slipped my tongue, I shouldn’t have said it.”

“It’s okay,” you reach and rub his forearm, “you’re dealing with lots of things now, I understand, we all do.”

“I hope I don’t ruin your summer with us with my stupid sappy attitude,” Aemond jokes — or at least tries to.

“Sappy or not, you are my best friend’s brother, and I watched you grow up! There is nothing you can do to make my time with you miserable,” you smile at him softly, finishing your plate before you both stand up to get ready and leave, “I’ll take care of the dishes, you go close your suitcase and we take whatever’s left to your car.”

Time passes quickly and you find yourself getting inside Aemond’s car later than you expected. He makes sure everything is packed and safe both in the apartment and in the trunk before he gets inside the passenger seat — he can’t drive at night because of his eyesight so you’ll drive to King’s Landing. It’s not a long ride fortunately; four hours by car and you’ll be there in no time.

Aemond, despite trying to keep up with the conversation, falls asleep halfway through the road, and you let him take a nap before you arrive there and get bombarded by questions left and right.

When you pull in front of the entrance gates, Cole is already waiting for you, ready to take your bags out and park the car even though someone else could be doing it.

“Hi, Cole,” Aemond greets him with a thick voice, rubbing his sleepy eye before he gives Criston a halfway hug, patting his back.

You shut down the engine, get out of the car, and greet Cole after you hand him the remote, following Aemond in the path leading to the entrance door with a few boxes in hand as you help him take a few of his belongings inside the house.

Alicent is already waiting in front of the door anxiously, slowly rubbing her throat and neck as she waits for Aemond to reach her before she brings him in a tight embrace, not minding the sharp points of the boxes digging in her sides — just having her son with her is enough to remedy all of her pain.

“My darling,” she tears up a little, caressing his hair and kissing his cheek, “I’m so happy you decided to come home, I missed you so much.” “I missed you too, Mother,” he pulls back a little to put the boxes down and hug her completely, resting his head on top of hers as she wraps her arms around him.

Everyone is interrupted when a series of barks echo in the house, and in a second, a huge fluffy black Chow Chow jumps on Aemond, licking his face happily. Vhagar, oh, how he missed his old lady. He chuckles and scratches behind her ears, ignoring all the stares as he reunites with her.

“Babyyyyyyy!” Helaena squeals before she runs towards you to help you with Aemond’s things, kissing you and giving you a side hug, “Thank you for agreeing to come! I’m sure we’ll have lots of fun together.”

“Thank you for having me, lovey!”

“I’m so thankful you helped him, darling,” Alicent pulls away from the pair nearly lying on the floor while one of them is having his face licked, her hand caressing your back as she draws you in her arms as well, “Thank you for bringing home, I’m in debt to you—”

“Oh, no, it was nothing!” You look at her before giving Aemond and Vhagar a cheeky smile, “It was the least I could do, I’m glad I could help.”

“Come, come! You must be tired, your rooms are ready. Cole will take your bags,” she says, leading the way with Aemond who has his free arm wrapped around Daeron, and Vhagar jumps next to his feet while you and Helaena follow them.

“Aegon is asleep, you know him, he has big plans for this summer, especially now that Aemond can use some distraction,” she bumps her shoulder to yours, “meaning we’ll have the time of our lives!”

“Yeah,” you smile at her before looking ahead of you, catching Aemond turning around to give you a quick smile, “What a summer it’ll be.”

[henry7931]

Got Your Body B*tch!

Drew:

This is Marco, he’s a raging asshole (for a lack of better words). I’ve known him all of my life, down to when we were young kids. And he’s always been a huge pain.

Marco, is the type of guy who’s cocky, always gets what he wants, comes from really nice rich parents, and incredibly insensitive.

He’s been that way forever.

I thought I was done with him when I left to go to college. That was until I walked in to my college apartment and saw Marco unpacking bags.

“Drewphus! I didn’t know you’re my roomie. You’re going to have to leave the apartment when bring a girl over, okay? Oh also, no touching my shit. I don’t want you get poverty all over it.”

If looks could kill in a moment, I swear Marco would be dead on the ground right now.

“I’m kidding…. Well, kinda. So here is your space, I hope you don’t mind but i already called the bigger bedroom since i was here first.”

“That’s fine Marco,” I say biting my tongue.

“Great, well have fun unpacking whatever you got in those two suit cases. I’m gonna have some private Marco time if you know what I mean”

Marco makes a jerking off hand gesture, I just roll my eyes and head into my new room.

A few hours past after I unpack and settle in, I order a pizza for dinner and lay back in bed.

All I can think about is how I’m about to have to live in the same quarters as Marco. The same guy I cant stand to be around.

Ugh…

So just like I always do when I get this stressed— it’s time to jerk off. (Something I’m sure Marco has already done 12 times today)

I checked my phone to see how much time I have until the pizza arrives, one hour. Great!

I pull off my shorts and open up my laptop. I feel a little embarrassed to admit this but I the kind of porn I like isn’t for everyone. I have a foot fetish. And not just that I this thing for jock athletes and their feet. I hate how much it turns me on especially since it’s guys like Marco that really get me going.

I start scrolling through and see this really hot jock with big feet. I click on his page. His username says AlphaAlex, he’s tan, dirty brown curly hair, six pack, big muscles…

I start mentally picturing him with me in the room, fantasizing him taking off his sneakers and dirty gym socks in front of me.

He says to me, “Hey Drew, do you mind rubbing my feet? I’ve had a really long practice and they are killing me.”

He puts them on my lag and says, “sorry if they stink!”

He lets me rub them and I ask him if I can smell them…

He says, “Sure, you can do whatever you want with them. After you’re done with my big jock feet, do you mind massaging my cock next?”

I stare deeply into AlphaAlex’s massive bulge on the screen. Almost about to nut…

“BRO!!! WHAT THE F*CK DREWFUS! I KNEW YOU WERE A HOMO BUT YOU’RE A FOOT FREAK TOO?”

Cum squirts onto my chest just as I turn to see Marco standing at my door with his cellphone recording in hand.

“MARCO!!! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?”

“Bro, wait until I show this to everyone! Now everybody going to know you’re a foot freak!!”

“MARCO PLEASE NOOO!!!”

I hop out of bed and Marco turns around and I chase him butt naked through our apartment.

He screams, “Stop chasing me foot freak!!!”

Marco shuts the door and I feel my stomach turn. I beg him to delete the video but he doesn’t respond.

As I go back to my room, I cry into my pillow… I feel so mortified.

I lay back, wiping my tears and say, “If someone could hear me, I wish I can get revenge on Marco. No I want more! I want everything Marco has…”

I cry myself to sleep, nervous for what the next day had in store for me.

The next morning, I wake up feeling kinda off. It takes me a second but I realize that somehow I’m not in my room!

In a panic, I rush to get out of bed until I come across a mirror.

That’s when I see Marco’s reflection looking back at me!!!

“Holy shit!!”

I feel a moment of fear hit me… but then I remember my wish last night. Someone out there listened to me.

I look at Marco’s face and then down at his body. Hes a dick but…. He is hot…

I pull off Marco’s shorts he slept in and his 10 inch hard morning wood comes flopping out.

“Holy fuck…”

I grasp it in Marco’s hand, which I guess is my hand now?

Nervous, yet kinda excited, I wasn’t sure what to do.

I looked down at the throbbed cock in my new new hands and immediately start jerking off.

I hop back into Marco’s bed and bring his foot up to his face. He actually has some sexy feet!

I start licking his foot from heal to toe. I relish in knowing the fact that he would go insane if he saw me with his body right now.

I keep tugging away at his cock and this maybe the best jerk off session in my life.

I twist Marco’s nipple and let out a soft moan.

“Fuckkk Marco your nipples are sooo sensitive,” I say aloud.

Hearing his voice sends me into a frenzy, just the thought that I can say anything, do anything as him. I have complete control of this dickhole!

I stand up out of bed and dash to the mirror, I grin at his reflection and jerk his cock even faster.

“Drew, it feels soo good, keep jerking my cock Drew. My body belongs to you now, my big feet, my sensitive nipples, my sexy abs… FUCKKKK THIS IS SOOO HOTTTT!!!”

I nearly screaming by this point and I feel every muscle in Marco’s body tighten.

I’m tugging so fast now and then cum sprays all over the place.

I fall back onto Marco’s bed covered in his nut. I look at his covered hand and lick it clean.

I lay back and gently rub his fingers back and forth on his stomach up to his chest.

Then reality started to sink….

Wait, if I’m Marco… what happened to my body?

“AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”

I hear a distant familiar scream coming from the background.

“Oh shit…”

Heavy footsteps coming charging my direction and before I can even get up the door slams open.

Out of the door is my body…

My eyes get big, I don’t think I’ve ever been that angry. My face is blood red and he starts to charge at me.

“Hold up!” I say hopping on top of the bed.

“DREW YOU PIECE OF SHIT IM GOING TO END YOU!!”

He balls up a fist and starts to pull back. Before he can reach me I grab the balled fist.

I guess Marco’s body has quicker reflex’s.

I pull him in and toss him on the bed. I pin him down and say, “I’m a lot stronger than you now. You wanna talk instead?”

“F YOU!!!”

I twist my former weaker arm and he shouts out, “OWWW SHIT, FINNNE!!!”

I get hop off my body and let him turn over.

He glances me over and says, “did you just jerk off in my body?”

I look down at the undeniable evidence.

“Yeah, I did. It was amazing.”

“You piece of—”

I look down and notice the tent in my boxers.

“Wait are you turned on right now?” I say to him.

“NO IM NOT!”

“You have a very noticeable boner right now.”

“Shut up! No I don’t!”

“What was it for you? Seeing your body all naked? Or was it when I pinned you down?”

He says nothing to me, just looks away.

“I mean you have very hot body Marco, theirs no shame in being turned on by it. Hell, I can’t stand you and I just had the best jerk off session in my life. What’s getting all hot and bothered? Is your hairy pits?” I hold his armpit up and step closer to him.

“Or maybe it’s the sight of your own cock.” I say shaking his semi-hard dick at him.

I move even closer to him. He looks like he’s in a trance.

“Oh you know what always gets me hard. Big manly feet,” I kick his foot up and show it to him.

I place his foot on my former bulge and start rubbing it.

“Does that feel good?”

He still say nothing but lets me keep going.

I push him further on the bed and pull off the brief I went to bed in my last.

My dick comes out standing straight up and leaking from the tip.

I place his foot on it and start toying with it using his toes.

He lets out a moan.

I look at my former face and he’s so turned on right now.

I pull his foot away and he says softly, “please don’t stop…”

“Oh you don’t want me to stop?”

“No… please Drew… it’s throbbing…”

“Well you’re gonna have to finish the job yourself, I’m going to shower and head to the pool.”

“WHAT!??”

“Yeah the pools still open, got to make the most out of these last few warm days Drew.”

“YOU!!! Drew, you can’t just leave me like this!!! I want my body back right now!”

“Sorry DREW! But this wasn’t my doing necessarily. If anything this is karma for you being such a prick all these years. Now run along and go take care of that boner little gay boy.”

I look at the corner of Marco’s room and see his dirty sock.

“Oh here you go! A gift from me to you, enjoy!”

I give my former throbbing dick a pat and I run off to the shower, leaving Marco in his mixed emotional state.

I rinse off quickly and come back out, I walk back into Marco’s room and see he’s still on the bed— sniffing the dirty sock and wanking one out.

“Oh fuck you’re back already!” he says to me.

He looks so pathetic right now.

“Geez, just stay right where you are.”

I drop the towel and get into bed with him. I grab my former cock and push it into Marco’s throat.

“HOLY!!!!” he screams out.

I suck off my former body while Marco’s moans frantically.

I feel him running my former hands in his hair and I feel myself getting a little excited from it. It’s kinda hot being this aggressive and sucking my former body off.

He lets out a loud grunt and cums down my new throat.

“Better?,” I say whipping the excess cum off my mouth.

“God yeah,” he says taking heavy breaths.

I look at my former body in the eyes and for a split second I thought about kissing him. But then reality sinks in… that’s still Marco inside.

I get out of bed and say, “I’m heading down to the pool.”

I put on his bathing suit and he says to me, “Drew, I’m sorry for being such a dick.”

“I know you are,” I say back.

“Can we try to fix this?”

“I’m sorry to Marco but I don’t think we fix this, these may be our bodies forever. So you might as well get comfortable.”

I left him sitting in his now former room naked and silent.

When I get down to the pool it doesn’t take me long to notice others noticing me.

Some girls and some guys, I look over at some of the guys and even wink at one. He is super cute and fit.

I hop on to a float and lay back soaking up the sun. I wait to see if that guys going to make a move when the ultimate buzz kill shows up.

It’s Marco in my body.

“Sup,” he says to me.

“Just trying to relax.”

“Yeah well, we still need to talk.”

“We don’t now f*ck off.”

He rolls his eyes and walks over a chair by the pool.

Soon that guy from earlier comes over.

“Hey, what’s up?” he says to me with a grin.

“Just laying out wait for you to come over,” I say with a smirk.

“Oh is that so?” he says flirtatiously.

He gets into the pool and now he’s right next to me.

“I’m Lois.”

“Marco,” I say introducing myself to him.

“So do you live here?”

“Yeah I’m on the second floor.”

“Nice, I’m on the third.”

We flirt and have small talk for a minute until he asks me out.

“Sure you wanna do tonight?” I say to him.

“Oh man, yeah I’m down,” he tries not to be too excited.

“Great, let’s say 7?”

“Yeah 7 works for me.”

“Cool,” I say grinning at him.

I peak out of the corner of my eye and see my Marco coming up to the pool.

“What are you doing?” he says to me.

“Oh hey Drew, this is my roommate.”

“Oh nice, I’m—”

“Don’t care dude, I need to talk to you Marco.”

“Uh okay, sorry Lois. I’ll see you tonight?”

“Yeah for sure!”

I get out of the pool and walk back to the apartment with Marco angry.

“What was that?” he says sternly.

“None of your business! Also you were just so f*cking rude!”

“I don’t care! You were flirting with that guy!”

“Yeah so? We are going on a date tonight.”

“WHAT?!?”

“Yeah, and you interrupted it.”

“You’re going on a date with a guy in my body?!?”

“It’s my body now and yes I am!”

“But… but you just sucked me off and…”

“And what? You thought that was something special?”

“OF COURSE NOT! I’M NOT GAY!”

“Well what you did a few hours ago seemed pretty gay to me.”

“Yeah that’s because I’m in your gay body and plus that’s my body. It’s kinda like masterbation.”

“Whatever man, I really don’t care. If you want to pretend to be straight that’s fine. But I’ll be honest, I think you’ve always had feelings for guys. I know because I’m in your body and I’m still attracted to men.”

“SHUT UP!!!”

“So it’s true, you’ve been a dick to me my entire life about my sexuality, what I like, and it turns out you have some pinned up jealousy towards me right?”

Marcos looking down at the ground.

“We could have been friends, do you not get that?!? We could have—”

Marco grabs me and kisses me.

I was so shocked and I even felt butterflies in my stomach. We kiss for a few minutes before I pull back.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!?”

“I’m sorry Drew! I was never going to do all of that stuff. I… I don’t know how to say this… I like you. I like you a lot. Hell, I thought about kissing you just about every time I went to kiss any girl. But I have so much anger and you’re right I am jealous! I’m jealous that you’re out and proud of yourself. You’re so confident! Fuck!!”

“So why put me through so much!?!! I mean look at us, we’re literally trapped as each other now! All of this could have been prevented if you just owned up.”

“I thought… I thought you would have hated me so much that you would tell everyone the truth about me. So… I just, I was a prick.”

“Damn right you were!”

“Sorry… again.”

“It’s fine, I guess I’m sorry for causing this body swap thing between us. I made some wish last night to get back at you. I didn’t think it would become anything but then woke up as you.”

His eyes get big, “so that’s how this happened?”

“Yeah, I guess something out in the universe was listening in and heard me.”

“That’s nuts.”

“Yeah it is.”

“Well if we are being honest about everything. I wasn’t just turned on by you dominating me upstairs. I was freaked out and yet turned on from being inside of you.”

“Really? My body?”

“Yeah Drew, you’re cute. You have an adorable face, cute slim figure, you’re charming yet kinky.”

“Wow.”

“And now I guess we are going to have to be each other forever?”

“Yeah I guess so.”

“Well if I had to be anyone else, I’m glad it’s you.”

“You mean that?”

“I do.”

I grinned at him and he smiles back at me. We both start to laugh.

“Are you still going on a date with this Lois guy?”

“Well not if an adorable guy who’s charming yet kinky stops me.”

“I guess that’s me now isn’t it?”

“Yep!”

“Well I can’t fully stop you but I can tell you this. If you don’t go—we can order take out, lay in bed together, and fool around all night.”

“Hmmmm… that sounds promising.”

“Plus, I know my body really well. And I can tell you no one knows how to make that body feel as good as I do.”

“Is that so?”

He walks closer to me seductively and Im starting to get hard again.

“I’ll nibble on those nipples, toy around with my balls…I bet you these hands are going to feel so good working that cock..”

He reaches into my bathing suit and I gasp.

“Fuckkk, I guess I’ll be staying tonight,” I say barely getting words out.

“Hell yeah!!!”

3 Months Later:

“Babe, are you packed? We got to be at your parents in a couple of hours… Babe?”

“Hi”

“Are you kidding?”

“We have time for a quick round, sides I’ll jerk you off using these sexy toes,” I say wiggling my feet at my boyfriend.

“Fuckkk… I guess we have time.”

Marco pulls off his shirt and I see the definition built into my former chest. He’s been hitting the gym a lot lately and everyday he’s looking sexier and sexier.

Marco pulls off his shorts and he’s already hard from these feet. It works like a charm every time.

I watch as my boyfriend grabs the foot that used to belong to him and he kisses every toe.

It’s crazy how quick the time had flown since we woke up as each other. I guess it helps that we are so in love with one another.

I start rubbing the cock that used to belong to me and now I’m hard.

“Babe, you are so talented with those toes… mhmmm that feels good.”

I use both feet and stroke back and forth.

He stops me for a second and plants my foot on his face.

“Did you work today without any socks on?”

“Hell yeah I did.”

He takes a big sniff of them.

“Fuckkk, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

[lactoseintolerentswag]

Rise Characterizations

Last month I did an in-depth re-watch of rottmnt s1 to take some notes on writing the characters of rise from their perspective and such. Figured I'd share what I found, but I'm also posting this bc my docs have a nasty habit of blipping out of existence.

We'll start with Raph bc he's the oldest of course, but I'll post the others sep. bc this is gonna get long!!

Raph Character Notes

Language Habits:

Catchphrases: "like a boss", "smash"

Verbalizes his attacks such as "smash", "knuckle sandwich", "power smash jitsu", "tonfa power jitsu", "mystic punch jitsu"

Uses older song titles for surprised exclamations or in place of cursing, most notably "jumping jack flash!"

Uses aave/bae, For example: 'em instead of them, 'ey instead of they, 'cause instead of because, forgoes the g in ing words (going becomes goin')

Uses less and less grammar the more he's stressed, and his voice will come to a higher pitch

Will speak in a softer tone to his little brothers if he's concerned about hurting their feelings. Aka babying them

Mixes up both metaphors and idioms. Would be one to say how the turn tables unironically

Does say "hero" a lot, lost count, especially in phrases like "hero town"

Refers to his brothers as "boys" or "fellas"

Refers to Splinter as "pop(s)" most often

Refers to strangers he's directly talking to as "bubs" or "hoss"

Personality:

Protective of his family

Plays up the hero act/has a strong sense of duty and justice

Impatient, rushes in without a plan (pre-movie), doesn't finish books until the end, falls asleep during "boring movies"

Oblivious, doesn't read into things beyond surface level. Struggles with empathy when something is beyond his understanding, but is still very emotional

Center of responsibility for his brothers, but also has a reckless sense of fun. As long as it's him doing the stupid unsafe thing it's fine

Carries the weight, in a literal sense he piggy backs his brothers, but will also use his body as a shield from danger. Unfortunately this also means he takes his brothers a little less seriously (Mikey the most common victim), and will try and either protect them from everything or as an oldest sibling everything has go "his way"

Doesn't do well in solitude. Needs to be looking after people to feel functional, and needs to be around people to feel safe

Clumsy, "takes horrible pictures", isn't very good at hiding, he's a big guy so it probably took a lot of time to find balance

A sweet guy who still won't shy from making fun of his family. Leo tends to be the brunt of his teasing since he is the most annoying, but he will also poke Donnie on his dramatics

Likes cute things!!! Has a teddy bear collection and loves animals. It's so cool how this isn't played off as a joke and he's still just as masculine for liking pink and cutesy stuff

Likes fighting!!! Gets a lot of energy out defeating bad guys (where he directs his anger towards), the one who is shown to train the most, and also weight lifts in his spare time

Doesn't do well under pressure, here the anger comes out the most. He gets stressed when it's all on him, especially since he tends to mess up the most in these moments

Miscellaneous:

Second to unlock mystic powers

Nicknames/codenames: "raph-a-doodle" by leo, "red rover" by april, "red king" by donnie

Teddy bear names: Doctor Huggenstein, Captain Snuggles, Cheech

Stinks: fear stink, amazement stink, sneaking up on people stink, victory stink

Seems to be less afraid of rabbits and more afraid of puppets

Went on his first solo mission at 13

Cannot lift a bus, at age 15

Thought about discussing fighting style, but I'm not as familiar with that concept and I've seen a couple posts dissecting such topic. So we'll end here for now. Hope this was helpful!!! I'll post the rest of the boys later and link here

Leo is up!!

Donnie is up!!

Mikey is up!!

Splinter is up!!

April is up!!

Cassandra is up!!

Baron Draxum is up!!

[ju1cyfru1t]

Y/N’s Guide of a Snapping Turtle Mutant

Rise! Raphael x reader

Fluff! :D gn reader, romantic leaning but can be read as platonic

In which Raph stumbles upon your documentation on himself.

Donnie Leo Mikey

∑Subject of interest

Snapping turtle mutant; large humanoid turtle man

∑ Diet:

Pizza, soup???, meats, carrots, ⚠️allergic to peanuts⚠️

∑ Likes:

Red, punching stuff? (owes me new mirror), hot (specific) soup???, wrestling, Lou Jitsu (watch movies), teddy bears (save coupons), R&B, Jupiter Jim (movies, comics, games), shell scratches, red buttons (owes me an uncracked collar bone; ask why Donnie would add sear ejectors)

∑ Dislikes:

Turtle tank (claims to be “tank-aphobic”), hurting other people’s feelings? (very sweet), “Leo’s tomfoolery” (me too, bro, me too), reading, being snuck up on

∑ Tail language 🛑 do NOT pull, subject screams very loud🛑

twitching rapidly: threatened, scared, nervous. (can smell fear on subject? should I be concerned?)

wagging: excited, happy, proud. (Turtle likes to hear he’s doing a good job)

still and loose: relaxed, confused, sad. (Subject tends to overthink; or not think enough)

——————————————————————————

Raph sighed with a big, swooning smile, setting your paper down on the counter as he finished reading it for the 5th time over. It just made him misty-eyed to see that you, someone so perfect to him, cared so much about him, a big scary mutant. (Even though he’s really not all that scary.)

It made his heartbeat quicken and his chest feel tight, but in a good way. In the best way.

Obviously he knew it wasn’t right for him to read through your personal notes, but I mean, hey. The folder had his name on it, so that basically made it his too.

Still, he didn’t want to seem like a jerk. He had to make it up to you somehow…but making his own gifts was never his strong suit. But…he could add to yours?

——————————————————————————

∑Subject of interest

Snapping turtle mutant; large humanoid turtle man

∑ Diet:

Pizza, soup??? ? I mean it’s ok, I guess., meats, carrots, ⚠️allergic to peanuts⚠️

∑ Likes:

Red, punching stuff? (owes me new mirror) Sorry. What size you want?, hot (specific) soup??? You have got to watch Lou Jitsu. , wrestling, Lou Jitsu (watch movies), teddy bears (save coupons), R&B, Jupiter Jim (movies, comics, games), shell scratches, red buttons (owes me an uncracked collar bone; ask why Donnie would add seat ejectors) I’M SORRY

∑ Dislikes:

Turtle tank (claims to be “tank-aphobic.” What does this mean?) it means exactly what it sounds like (I blame Donnie), hurting other people’s feelings? (very sweet) Who, me? Naaah, “Leo’s tomfoolery” (me too, bro, me too), reading, being snuck up on

∑ Tail language 🛑 do NOT pull, subject screams very loud🛑 WE DON’T TALK ABOUT THAT

twitching rapidly: threatened, scared, nervous. (can smell fear on subject? should I be concerned?) STOP TALKIN ABOUT MY FEAR STINK I TOLD YOU IT’S PERFECTLY NORMAL

wagging: excited, happy, proud. (Turtle likes to hear he’s doing a good job) Yes, he does.

still and loose: relaxed, confused, sad. (Subject tends to overthink; or not think enough) HEY. That’s …so fair.

Love you♡ IGNORE THAT IM USING A PEN I CAN’T ERACE ERASE

——————————————————————————

AHHHHHHH 4/4

I HOPE THIS IS AS GOOD AS THE OTHER 3 <3

sorry this took a hot second

[andy-wm]

On a personal note...

This is a personal story, so feel free to scroll on past (if you're only here for the Jikookery I can respect that).

I'm posting this because it's connected to what Jimin and Jungkook (specifically Jimin) may or may not be doing with this album and their travel series "Are you sure", and by that I mean coming out publicly as queer and as lovers. If it sounds vague, it is, because I don't know what they're doing yet. I don't know how far Jimin is taking this or what direction he'll go. But if he is going to make his private life public, then my post is relevant even though my experience is a microscopic spec 0f what he will encounter.

I live in a conservative little town on the edge of a big city, we're almost the last stop on the metro train line. This place has 10 000 residents and a reputation for being a little on the rough side. It's not a bad place and the people are not bad people but they won't step aside if you pick a fight, lets put it that way.

There's one high school in our little town, and I am the school librarian. I also run the school's pride club and when I started it 5 years ago (that's when I joined this school) it kicked up a bit of a stink. The community had mixed feelings. I wasn't out as trans at that point, only as queer. The school principal supported the club but wanted me to keep it quiet (I didn't). She wanted me to be appeasing (I wasn't). And when we had challenges from homophobic students, she wanted me to 'let her handle it' ( I didn't).

I responded to bigotry with patience and kindness, modelling the behaviour I expected and having many many conversations about prejudice, the patriarchy, learned behaviour, fear of the unknown, and minding your own damn business....

When I came out as trans to the school community - changing my name and pronouns - I faced some real push back from both staff and students. Students were less openly hostile but sometimes the subtle attempts at bullying are worse. My line manager was really difficult about it. I was a hot topic of conversation. It wasn't a good time. But I stuck with it, partly because I couldn't go back and partly because the Pride Club students were so empowered by what I was doing. They thought I was really brave. I couldn't let them down.

It was a tough time for me personally. Every day was a struggle as I navigated my wavering sense of identity and tried to be true to myself. Most of my family and friends were okay with it but some were not. Some flipped back and forth, some thought I had lost my mind. I had to let a few people go from my life, including one of my closest friends. I've lost a few more since then. I've cried more in the past few years than I have in my whole life and I am pretty tough, so you gotta know - it was a lot.

Fast forward to now. The pride club is well established, homophobia still exists but it's less overt and it's no longer ignored, and we have staff who are active allies. It's definitely a success. Our students to have a safe place where they can be themselves, and slow change is coming to the culture of the school.

It has come at a personal cost though. Not a HUGE personal cost but enough for it to matter. I am recognised and known around town because, well, most people in small communities know each other. But more so because of my role in the school, and because I am the only out and vocal queer person on school staff (yes, there are other LGBTQIA+ staff but they keep it quiet, and I don't really blame them).

At school i still have to correct people on my pronouns on a daily basis, and occasionally a student will throw a comment my way but it's not often these days. I have to come out to all the new staff pretty much as soon as I first meet them otherwise it's awkward. It's just an everyday thing. It's not a big deal but it's tiring, and it's something cis/straight people don't ever have to think about.

What is tough, though, is sniping from the community at large every now and again. I have been targeted on community socials and I've had had some pretty brusque service from local shop owners and service personnel in local businesses. Sometimes I see kids from school at the shops and they point me out to their parents. I pretend it's because they're happy to see me (what the fuck else am I going to do - hide in the apple crate?) They may say a friendly hello... or they may following me through the aisles of the supermarket trying to menace me - yes, that has happened - I just have to wait and see.

I do have allies in the community too - like the gorgeous pharmacist who always gets my name and pronouns right and compliments me (on whatever he can think of) every time I collect my meds. There's a stern woman in the hardware store who makes a point of loudly correcting herself when she uses the wrong pronouns (often). I appreciate this, I really do, but honestly it would be great if she could be a little quieter.

I am not a celebrity by any means, just a small town school librarian. But wherever I go in my small town - to the doctor, the supermarket, the park, or the gym - there's a chance I'll encounter someone who knows my face. Sometimes that makes me nervous.

The point of this long and boring post is to give people who may not know what it's like, a bit of insight into the experience of a regular, everyday person who lives in a conservative place and who is both recognisable and queer. It can be exhausting, and from time to time I struggle with mental health issues. So I have no doubt that for people who are really well known, it would be much, much worse. They would be the subject of public debate on news sites and TV. They'd be tossed into arguments by politicians on both sides of the divide. They'd encounter hostility in person too, and that's really frightening.

So please remember that if the celebs you admire choose NOT to come out, it's because they've weighed up their choices and that's the safest option for them. Support them where they're at, so they can live their best life under the circumstances.

If they do come out, they'll probably need even more support. Please love them, defend them, celebrate them, and validate them. They need you more than you know.

And above all else, be a good human.

PS, no need to comment here, this is purely a PSA <3

[sorrowsdespair]

Who Let Gojo Have A Baby Carrier

Contains: Getou x Satoru, baby reader, gender-neutral reader, spoilers for the anime, might expand these into headcanons, not proofread

-

Episode 2 - Megumi although wouldn’t openly admit his trust in Gojo’s abilities to keep you safe and unharmed, that doesn’t mean he’ll let the dumbass fight Sukuna with you in a baby carrier strapped to his chest. “If you don’t give (Name) to me, I will call Getou.” He threatened and Satoru waited no time doing just so not before calling him a big meany. Unfortunately, Satoru had made the mistake of sending Suguru a photo of Megumi ruffled up when he had sent them to the second year.

~

Episode 3 - Nobara’s first impression of her new teacher was anything but good. So to see him with an adorable baby dressed in bright-colored clothing in his arms, she had to assume he was just babysitting because there was no way he was responsible for such cuteness. She even noticed Megumi giving Satoru the stink eyes which confirmed her thoughts. Especially, when the man had lied about taking them to Roppongi and instead to a rundown building with a curse in it. “First, you lied! Then you bring someone else’s baby to such a dangerous place! What’s wrong with you!”

Satoru pouted, “I’ll have you know this baby is my munchkin, I’ll be out here while you and Yuji will be dealing with the cursed spirit!” While placing you in the baby carrier facing him and gently rubbing a single knuckle against your cheek.

~

Episode 7 - Jojo assumed Gojo was foolish to face him head-on. Sure, Gojo had come out unscathed from his first attack but he wasn't to see you, an infant, strapped to the man’s back also unharmed. You had let out a couple of coughs followed by a whimper prompting Gojo to turn his attention to you. “Oh! Give me a moment,” Jojo was annoyed how unbothers Gojo was and had to watch as the man readjusted the strap so you comfortable resting on his chest.

Jojo tsked, he this was his prime opportunity and he was going to take it. Besides Kenjaku had informed him about how beneficial it would be to use you against Gojo and Getou. All it was for him was to figure out how to separate from the two of you or he could just kill you both. “Ember Insects!”

“Well, that's not very nice.”

~

Added Bonus: Ijichi may fear Gojo, but he tends to forget how Getou can be way scarier because not only was Gojo late, he was supposed to arrive with Gojo Satoru especially when he had you with him for a meeting with Principal Yaga and Getou, but he had allowed the both of you to exit the vehicle a random location for unknown reasons.

[popcat69]

Iron what?

Rottmnt boys x anaemic!reader

Notes: this can be read with gn!reader. I didn't get a request for this but i almost passed out a few days ago so i thought this would be kinda funny to write something i relate to a bit. Enjoy <3

Warnings: no warnings just the boys being sweet and caring. Leo is a bit of an ass but oh well

Raph

Before Raph knew you had a iron deficiency he would always be confused as to why you had to take a moment when you stood up from lying down. Or when you felt dizzy alot.

One time when you decided to have a movie night with him and you stood up too quickly you felt dizzy and lightheaded. You grabbed the closest thing to you or well turtle to help support you.

Poor boy was so worried

He was franting asking if you were alright

You were able to smell his fear stink 

Once you told him you had an iron deficiency he was confused so you had to explain it to him. He understood quite fast and began keeping a closer eye on you.

Feeling dizzy? He's carrying you. 

Looking paler then usual? He sitting you down to eat something.

If you take medication he will put an alarm on your phone and his to not forget.

Leo

How this turtle found was something else

Long story short you stood up too fast and basically fell to the floor

Leo being the insufferable person he is thought you tripped on something and was laughing his ass off.

But in no less then a minute hes realising you not moving and goes into full panic mode.

As you regained consciousness you realise you were on the couch next to a turtle fulls of tears.

He pulled you into a big hug as you calm him down and explaining that your anaemic.

Leo has experience with medical…stuff? Perks of being the team medic.

Soon after that whole incident he started to become more observant. Always by your side when you stand up or when you haven't eaten a lot that day.

With leo if you take medication if he will keep a bottle on him at all times incase you have forgotten yours at home

Donnie

I feel like Donnie would already kind of know as hes quite observant

“I'm anaemic btw” “i know”

You kind of stared at him with a raised brow thinking. What?

Anyway he would always ask you if you have eaten a proper meal or gotten enough sleep.

Kinda ironic if you ask me

One time he gave you a diet plan to help with your iron deficiency and you followed it for like a day or two and then kinda forgot.

You felt really guilty when he asked how was the plan going. You knew he put the time and research to make it for you specifically so you gave him a sheepish smile as you looked around the room nervously.

Since that didn't work out he made you a portable pill dispenser? And it has a checklist on the back of it.

Have you eaten at least 3 proper meals?

Are you feeling dizzy a lot today?

You get the idea

You loved and cherished donnie’s small inventions that he gifts you.

Mikey (my beloved)

When mikey realised that you are frequently dizzy or lightheaded he would immediately asked if somethings the matter 

You explained to him without any hesitation and he would just slowly nod listening to you

He would find small ideas to help remind you to take your medication and to eat meals that are rich in iron.

Also he would send you small texts as reminders

Hey to the most amazing, best person in the world. Did you remember to eat enough?

Honestly it makes your heart melt. The first time he sent a text to you like that you were almost in tears holding you phone to your chest 

He once found out that you haven't eaten all day and forgot to take your medication from overworking yourself or just when having a bad day then BOOM!

Doctor feeling has arrived

[amber-laughs]

“They’re dogs and he’s a wolf,” said Jon. “They know he’s not their kind.”

Lord Ramsay laughed. "You're not a man, Reek. You're just my creature. You'll have your wine, though. Walder, see to it. And fear not, I won't return you to the dungeons, you have my word as a Bolton. We'll make a dog of you instead. Meat every day, and I'll even leave you teeth enough to eat it. A Dance with Dragons - Reek II

"I see what you are, Snow. Half a wolf and half a wildling, baseborn get of a traitor and a whore. You would deliver a highborn maid to the bed of some stinking savage. Did you sample her yourself first? A Dance with Dragons - Jon X

When Little Walder pulled him up and Big Walder waved the torch at him to herd him from the cell, he went along as docile as a dog. If he'd had a tail, he would have tucked it down between his legs. A Dance with Dragons - Reek I

"Aye. All that, and more. You are a warg too, they say, a skinchanger who walks at night as a wolf." King Stannis had a hard smile. "How much of it is true?" A Storm of Swords - Jon XI

That night, besides the collar, there was a ragged blanket too, and half a chicken. Reek had to fight the dogs for the meat, but it was the best meal he'd had since Winterfell. A Dance with Dragons - Reek II

 The smells are stronger in my wolf dreams, he reflected, and food tastes richer too. Ghost is more alive than I am. He left the empty cup upon the forge. A Dance with Dragons - Jon II

The other man had been a good rider, but Reek was uneasy on horseback. It had been so long. He was no rider. He was not even a man. He was Lord Ramsay's creature, lower than a dog, a worm in human skin. A Dance with Dragons - Reek II

“The Weeper’s red rheumy eyes gave Jon another look. “Aye? Well, he has a wolfish cast to him, now as I look close.” A Storm of Swords - Jon I

"Reek," he said. "Your Reek." "Do this little thing for me, and you can be my dog and eat meat every day," Lord Ramsay promised.  A Dance with Dragons - Reek II

The taste of hot blood filled Jon's mouth, and he knew that Ghost had killed that night. No, he thought. I am a man, not a wolf. He rubbed his mouth with the back of a gloved hand and spat. A Dance with Dragons - Jon II

Damon Dance-for-Me sat greasing up his whip. "Reek," he called. He tapped the whip against his calf as a man might do to summon his dog. "You are starting to stink again, Reek." A Dance with Dragons - A Ghost in Winterfell

"The beast," he gasped. "Look! The beast that tore the life from Halfhand. A warg walks among us, brothers. A WARG! This . . . this creature is not fit to lead us! This beastling is not fit to live!" A Storm of Swords - Jon XII

"You would have done better to slit his throat," said the lord in mail. "A dog who turns against his master is fit for naught but skinning." "Oh, he's been skinned, here and there," said Ramsay. A Dance with Dragons - Reek I

[leighsartworks216]

Might I request an enemies to friends to lovers with Astarion?

THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A QUICK LITTLE DRABBLE. IT IS ALMOST 4K WORDS. It also became a songfic. The song is "Your Stupid Face" by Kaden MacKay

Also it is 11:20. I am so tired. I do not have the energy to proofread this rn. So it's as good as it's gonna get

Warnings: self-doubt, bickering

Word Count: 3,957

Masterlist

AO3

Tag List Form

I just really hate your face

Though I know that won't surprise you

But, to me, your skin is one giant wart

And your laugh's one big snort

And you stink, so in short

I despise you

You disgrace the human race

'Cause you're more of a mosquito

I would rather have the dentist and drill

Then this swine in the swill

And if you were a bill, I would veto

And if the world was perfect, you would be gone without a trace

But since the world could never be that great

I'll just hate your stupid face

-

Astarion sighed just behind you. You glared over your shoulder at him. Did he really have to be so annoying when you were trying to help? What did he have against doing the right thing?! Or were all high elves as up their asses as him?

The little girl glanced nervously between you, her hands fiddling anxiously with each other. “I-Is that alright?”

You turned back to her with a big smile, though Astarion could see the strain behind it. “Of course! It’s no problem. We’ll find your toy and bring it back before nightfall, how’s that sound?”

“Really?!” Her eyes became wide and excited, bouncing on her feet like there were hot coals beneath it. “Thank you so much!”

You watched as she ran off back to her mother, jumping as she grabbed the woman’s arm and pointed at you. You smiled, genuine this time, and waved to them both. Then, you turned to go back into the woods.

The joy didn’t last long.

“I thought being an adventurer meant slaying dragons, learning powerful spells, gaining power - that sort of thing.” Astarion sighed again, long and dramatic, as he stepped over a branch. “But, no, here we are, armed to the teeth, tadpoles crawling into our minds, looking for a stuffed animal.”

You grit your teeth together and tried to ignore him. The sooner you found the girl’s stuffed bear, the sooner you could stop listening to his whining. “She said she lost it over here, somewhere, but something could have taken it or moved it by now. If we split up, we can cover more ground.”

You could almost feel the way he rolled his eyes. “Oh, great. If I find it, I’m not telling you. And I’m certainly not going to touch it. Gods only know what’s on it.”

“You’re such a child!”

He lays a hand over his chest, looking down his nose at you. “I’m so sorry that I have some dignity left.”

How did you get stuck with such an annoying, self-entitled, brat? 

“Fine! Then I’ll look, and you can follow me around like a lost puppy.” You smiled sickeningly sweet up at him, your whole expression filled with sarcasm and annoyance. “Happy?”

He scowled. “And I have to follow you because…? If you’re so eager for my company, you should just say so, darling.”

You shook your head, facade falling. “You’re impossible.” You stomped off. He could follow you or wait around, you didn’t have the energy left to care.

—

Oh, no

No

I just really like your face

You don't have to look so happy

I'm not really into love that you flaunt

In some glittery font

But if that's what you want

Make it snappy

I just feel so out of place

Well, except for when you're near me

When you're gone, I'm like a plant with no root

Or a song that's on mute

Don't you dare call it cute!

You should fear me!

And if the world was perfect, you would've never invaded my space

But since the world's obsessed with saying, "psych!"

Now I like your stupid face

-

You tilted your head, watching as Astarion held up a mirror. The tadpole kept him from burning in the sun, but it did nothing to bring back his reflection.

“Looking at something?” His voice catches you off guard. It was odd to have someone talking to you with their back turned, even more so when he could see your reflection and you couldn’t see his.

“Just looking,” you tell him. “What are you doing?”

He sighs, forlorn. “I’m looking, too, but not seeing very much. Another quirk of my affliction.”

“Do you miss it?”

He stands and turns while he speaks, finally meeting you face-to-face. “Preening in the looking glass? Petty vanity?” He sighs again. His face looks so droopy and sad, like a puppy left out in the rain. “Of course I miss it. I’ve never even seen this face. Not since it grew fangs and my eyes turned red.”

You look at his eyes, really look. It was hard to picture him with any other color. It was a side-effect of his vampirism, but you could go your whole life believing they always were and always had been red. “What color were they before?”

He opens his mouth to answer, then stops. “I don’t know. I can’t remember. My face is just some dark shape in my past.” His face scrunches up in rage as he throws the mirror on the ground. You step back to avoid the shards that break from it. “Another thing I’ve lost.”

You can’t imagine forgetting your face. It’s a rather big portion of who you are, after all. Thinking about looking in a mirror and seeing nothing stirs your stomach like a witch’s brew. You study his face, eyes tracing over every curve and sharp edge and wrinkle. You tried to imagine being him, no longer able to see what you looked like.

Astarion frowns at you. “What?”

“I’ll be your mirror.” The words are out before you can even think them, but a spark of hope flickers in his eyes, and you can’t bring yourself to back out of it now. “What do you want to know?”

“I want to know what the world sees when it looks at me.” He pauses. His voice gets soft, lacking its usual bravado. “What you see.”

He waits as you look at him. You try to figure out what the world sees, versus what you see. The world may see his eyes, sharp and red and keen. The world would see his dangerous smile, full of pretty teeth and sharp fangs, threatening to bite.

But it’s not what you see. You see his hair, paler than freshly fallen snow. You see the way it curls around his ears, how there’s always one stubborn strand hanging by his forehead. You see the wrinkles that crease his face when he smiles, surrounding his mouth and crowding in the corners of his eyes. And you’re startled, trying to figure out how long ago you’d noticed these things about him.

“I see… the creases when you laugh.”

He sneers, placing a hand over his chest. He takes it as an insult when you mean it in the kindest way possible. Without his wrinkles, he wouldn’t be Astarion. “Excuse me? I’m an eternally young vampire, not your doting grandmother.” He huffs. He looks like he wants to stop - never mind what he looks like, he doesn’t want to hear what else you could possibly say. But he continues, “You can do better. What else?” The curiosity wins out.

You wonder if you should tell him the easy answer. Tell him what the world sees. What everyone else sees. But to do so feels like a huge disservice. You inhale, prepared to be scolded once more. “I see the way your hair curls around your ears.”

“This is meant to be flattery, not poetry.” He sighs, creases forming between his brows as he frowns, annoyed. “Just tell me I’m beautiful and we can call it a day.”

“Is that all you want?” You don’t mean to sound as angry as you do. “Shallow praise?”

He scoffs. “Hardly.” He begins ticking off fingers. “There’s also gold, sex, revenge - quite the list, really. But failing any of those, I will always settle for shallow praise.”

You shake your head. “What I see isn’t good enough for you then? The seductive, charming face you put on for everyone else - that’s what you want to know about?” He sneers. He hates how easily you’ve read him. And you hate how much it hurts. You can’t tell if it’s because your words mean nothing, or because he can’t even allow himself a single, beautiful flaw. “The world sees your eyes. They’re strong and piercing. And your smile: Dangerous. They see you for the monster you are. Are you satisfied now?”

You leave before he can answer you. Anger trembles in your fingers, but they’re weighed down with sadness. A conflicting bundle of emotions twists in your chest. You shouldn’t care if all he wants is to be called pretty and move on. You shouldn’t! And you don’t!

But you do…

—

I just really miss your face

Though, by now, I must disgust you

I had tried to be the stubbornest mule

'Cause I knew life was cruel

So I guess I was foolish to trust you

But I wait here just in case

Though I know I'm being senseless

How could I have ever been so naive

And wear my heart on my sleeve

When I knew it would leave me defenseless?

And if the world was perfect, you would be here in my embrace

But since the world denied me one last kiss

I'll just miss your stupid face

-

The sun burned. Truly, honest to gods burned. And he ran. What else was he supposed to do? Bake in the sunlight while everyone else said their teary goodbyes, “We’ll see you down the road”, yadda yadda?

But, he can admit when he messed up.

He should have stayed longer. By the docks. The sun was just beginning to rise, he had plenty of time to slip from one shadow to the next before it was high in the sky. He could have said his goodbyes. He should have.

Already he missed Karlach. He fondly remembers when she hauled him over her shoulder, jostling him about as she ran. He certainly wasn’t too pleased at the time, but now… And he missed her nickname for him. And the banter, and teasing, and… everything.

Everyone had their charms, he supposed. Gale was, well, Gale, but even he wasn’t too bad. And you.

It was hard to admit. He could say he missed the others all day, but you? You who dragged him into the woods to find a stuffed animal for a kid? Who begrudgingly let him have a sip that night he revealed himself? Who yelled at him when he couldn’t bear hearing anything other than he wanted to when you offered to be his mirror? Who hugged him after he killed Cazador? Who helped him save his brothers and sisters and all the other souls whose lives he ruined? Who smiled so sweetly at him?

He couldn’t say it.

After he ran away, cursing and damning the gods for confining him to the shadows again, he disappeared to the Underdark. You’d mentioned how they needed a leader, guidance. And, well, he had nowhere else to go.

He never got to see you run in the direction he left after saying your goodbyes, smiling and excited. Or watch as you search and search for him. How you shout his name. How tears well in your eyes as you realize he’s gone.

And maybe it’s better that way.

—

What are you doing here?

I didn't run away!

It was... it was a strategic retreat

What is there to talk about? It's over—I ruined it

Well, yeah of course I'm sorry, but

No, no, don't forgive me!

Why do you do that?

Why—why give me another chance to mess things up?

Because you—what?

Those three little words

Out of the blue

Completely uncalled for

Especially from you

Why don't you hate me?

Why do you care?

Can't you berate me? Isn't that fair?

Where is your glare?

Don't you dare leave our problems and pain on the shelf!

Because if you don't hate me, I can't hate myself

But that's why I need you

You shatter my fear

'Cause despite my misdeed, you are still right here

Though it's stupid to date me

You're willing to try

And if you don't hate me, then why should I?

Are you sure you don't want to give up on me?

You're a moron

-

The last thing Astarion anticipates is you barging into his home, stomping and angry. The next last thing he expects is for you to throw a cloak in his face. He backs up as fast as you approach, tripping and falling backward over an armchair. It tips back with him and he lands with a thud. When he pulls the cloak off his face, you’re standing over him, still just as pissed as before.

“Ah.” He grins sheepishly. “Hello?”

“You ran away!”

“Yes, yes, I know-”

“You ran away! I went chasing after you and you were gone!”

“The sun! I couldn’t-”

“I know! That’s why I went and got you that damn cloak! And I was going to give it to you on the docks, but you ran away!”

He struggles to get up, grunting as he tries to push the armchair off so he’s not bent in half. You huff and sit the chair upright. Then, you offer him a hand. He’s not sure if he should take it. He’s half-certain you’ll flip him over and crack the floor with his body. But you wave your hand, insistent, and he does not want to piss you off any more, so he takes it. You haul him to his feet.

He holds the cloak out in front of him, studying it with a frown. “Darling, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but clothes don’t actually protect us from the sun.”

“Yes, I’m aware.” You sigh, hands on your hips, but you seem to have cooled off some. “It’s the Cloak of Dragomir. Gale helped me find where it was hidden. I figured, if the tadpole is the only thing keeping you safe in the sun, then after it’s all over, you’d need something else to protect you. So.” You gestured at the cloak.

He was speechless, and perhaps a bit skeptical. It had already been several weeks since the docks, and every day he would be lying if he said he didn’t miss it. Basking in the sun. Lounging in her warmth like a cat as he sleepily flipped through a book. It sounded too good to be true - a simple piece of fabric that could prevent him from turning to ash?

“Are you sure it works?”

You laughed, airily and annoyed. “No, I had a shortage of vampires to test it on at the time. I was going to find out when you tried it on. If it didn’t work, well…” You let out a long breath. You refused to take your eyes away from the cloak. Like looking at him again would bring all the rage and frustration back. “I’m still in touch with Gale. He can help me look for something.”

He spun it around to look at the back. It was a deep purple, with the only remarkable feature being a sort of fur around the neck and shoulders. He could almost imagine it hanging up in a shop.

You cleared your throat. ��Put it on.”

“Hardly the best place to test it. The sun doesn’t exactly reach down here.” Still, he unclasped it and swung it over his shoulders.

It was light and breezy, allowing air to move through, but warm enough it kept away any chill - not very concerning for a vampire, but still a nice feature. It reached mid-thigh. He shifted around in it, testing its movement and fit. He bristled when he felt something brush against his arm.

He lifted up the edge of the cloak where he felt it, and his undead heart stopped all over again. There, messily embroidered on the lining in gold thread. Little Star. A poor imitation of embroidered stars surrounded it, forming a sort of faux night sky.

“I did that.” You clear your throat and scratch the back of your head, avoiding his eyes everywhere you looked. Every time you glanced back at him and his dumbfounded face, your cheeks heated up. “I know it’s not as good as yours, but, you know, I thought it was the best way to get a message across.”

His chest was full of emotion. He still had a hard time deciphering it all, even after so long of you carefully teasing them out. But through it all was one resounding question.

“Why?”

You finally made eye contact with him. You frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, this can’t have been easy to get your hands on. You could have sold it when I ran away, but you embroidered it, sought me out… Why? Let’s be honest, dear, we’re not exactly friends.”

“We’re not exactly at each other’s throats either.” It came out harsher than you meant. You took a breath to calm your nerves. “I know we didn’t really get along when we first met - hells, we still argued about everything under the sun with the slightest prompting, but I do care for you.”

His lips quick up slightly. “An unfortunate choice. I’m not exactly the easiest person to care for.”

“No.” You smile, soft and patient. It was hard to look at you now and connect you to the person who barged into his room moments ago. “But I want to. You’re worth the effort.”

—

So you think that we could work?

Here I thought I'd been the dumb one—what?

You're forgiving me for all I did wrong

You're unmuting the song

And, again, I belong to someone

No! You can drop the stupid smirk

Though by now I guess you've earned that

'Cause no matter how intensely I pout

Your stupid face will win out

And I guess it's about time I learned that

And though we go together like a Chanel Nº 5 and mace

At least it's not as dull as fitting like a glove

'Cause you're a nightmare that I've not been dreaming of

But I suppose that when push comes to shove

Fine!

I love your stupid face

-

You tugged Astarion through the city, releasing short apologies left and right to any early-risers you bumped into. He’d tried asking multiple times where in the hells you were taking him, but you never answered. You just shot him a bright smile over your shoulder and kept on running.

Before he knew it, you were at the docks. A light orange hue lined the edge of the ocean, signaling the sun’s appearance. He frowned. “You dragged me all the way out here to watch the sunrise?”

“Yes.” You squeezed his hand. Your eyes were wide and bright and filled with overwhelming glee. “You never got to see it last time you were here. But now you can!”

He scoffed, a grin teasing at his lips. “Darling, we could watch the sunrise from anywhere. We don’t need to be exactly here to do so.”

You rolled your eyes. “Well, no, but it’s more about the principle of the thing. You didn’t get to see that sunrise and say goodbye, but now you can.”

Red eyes scanned the horizon. Oranges and yellows flooded from the ocean-line, chasing away the dark blue of night. He couldn’t deny it was beautiful, but…

He swallowed, frowning out at the sea. He couldn’t look at your face as he asked, quietly, too afraid to actually put the words out there, “So this is goodbye?”

The edge of the star poked her head out. He’d enjoyed watching the sunrises and sunsets during your adventure. He would welcome her touch onto his skin every day, grateful for even just a brief moment to be able to feel her warmth again after 200 years. And every night he would mourn her loss, a seed of fear planted deep within that any sunset could be his last, before he would be contained to the shadows forever. He never got to savor the last one. The one time he wasn’t prepared to go gracefully into that night.

“It doesn’t have to be,” you whisper back. If you hear the shuddering breath he lets out, you don’t say anything. If you see the tears building at the corners of his eyes as he turns to look at you, you don’t point it out. “I can stay. With you. If you want.”

“I couldn’t ask that of you.” But I wish I could. He wants nothing more than to be selfish. To take every single scrap you offer him and give nothing back.

You release his hand only to better tangle your fingers together. Your thumb runs along his palm. “You wouldn’t have to.”

“You’d be living in the shadows most of your life, even with this,” he lifts the edge of the cloak to make a point.

“Okay.”

“You wouldn’t be able to go on adventures. You wouldn’t be able to find someone else, have a family, live your life.”

“Okay.”

“Why are you so willing to give up everything for me?”

You raise your free hand to his cheek. It’s haloed by the red-orange light of the sun. He hates the way he leans into it without a second’s hesitation.

“Is it so hard to believe that I’d stay because I want to be with you?”

He opens his mouth, shuts it again, and tries to find the words. Strained, he chokes out, “Yes.”

“My lovely little star, even without the cloak, I’d stay in the shadows with you for eons. Adventure would be empty without you by my side. There is no one else I could bear to put up with besides you.”

He takes a breath and closes his eyes. It’s hard for the words to sink in, but he urges them to. Staying with him would not be a burden. He is not a burden. He holds your hand to his cheek, pressing it tighter against his skin. By the time he opens his eyes again, the sun is halfway risen.

“I’m not good at… this. Whatever this is. I have no idea how to do anything more than what I had to do. I have no idea what will happen.”

You smile. “Now that sounds like an adventure.”

He chuckles. The knot in his heart loosens. When had you turned from an annoying thorn in his side to this? How long ago had you wormed your way into his soul? What would he do without you?

He feels like he’s just been thrown downstream - caught in the current and waiting for it to burn. He’s uncertain as he leans forward slightly, experimentally. You let him come to you; you wait patiently and smile at him encouragingly until he rests his forehead against yours.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

The sun warms his skin as he lets go of the guilt holding him back. He’s a mess. He’s still working through his emotions with Cazador, trying to find footing amongst the spawn in the Underdark, trying to be good enough. And here you are saying he already is.

He catches your lips and allows himself to forget for the briefest moments that this is a terrible idea. How can he possibly think this is wrong when you sigh into his mouth and pull him closer? How can this possibly be wrong?

The reds, oranges, and yellows fade from the sky. Bright blue dominates the sky. And everything is okay.

---

Tag List:

@satelliteapotheosis @hypopxia @flsalazar @beverlybeav @angelofthorr @emiemiemiii @marina-and-the-memes @lynnlovesloki @aurasyn @furblrwurblr @cappsikle @mjmygd @thegirlsadventuresinwonderland @mheerdraws @kindadolly @httyd-chocolate @bloopthebat @pandimoostuff @chesb0red @chesb0red

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for asking someone not to make my art about a ship I hate?

This happened a couple months ago, but I’m still kinda unsure if I handled it correctly.

Basic rundown of events: I posted some art of a character on their own in the evening, and when I woke up the next morning, someone had reblogged with an addition about a ship that’s a big notp for me. I messaged them to ask they delete it as politely as possible, because people had been interacting with that version of the post specifically and it made me uncomfortable. They responded by saying I was being immature and needed to learn not to police what other people do on the internet. We exchanged a couple more messages, and I tried to explain my position my throughly. Neither of us was overtly hostile or anything, but I felt extremely talked down to by their tone of voice. After our conversation, we both blocked each other, and that was that. They never did delete their addition.

Why I think I might be TA: we weren’t exactly friends or anything. Neither of us followed each other. I’d seen them around in the fandom, and they’d reblogged some of my art in the past, but I think messaging someone I didn’t know instead of just blocking them might have been a bit of an overreach. Plus the ship in question is canon, and not particularly controversial or anything, so most people in the fandom probably wouldn’t have minded.

On the other hand, the ship being so unavoidable is a big part of the reason it upset me so much. It’s hard for me to exist in this fandom without having to see it constantly, and I don’t even ever mention the other character in it for fear of this exact thing happening. I’ve had people be assholes on my posts about the ship I prefer, or go out of their way to interpret my romantic posts about them platonically, or add tags to my art about how they only like my ship as backstory and not endgame. I don’t want to have to put a disclaimer every single time I post about this fandom. I just want to enjoy the things I like without being negative all the time. Which is why I figured messaging privately was more polite than making a stink where everyone could see. I specifically mentioned that I knew they wouldn’t have known and wasn’t mad.

No one actually ended up reblogging their addition, which is also a strike against me, but I got a lot of likes on specifically that version of the post, which made me scared they were going to. I hated the idea of having to turn off reblogs on a piece I’d worked pretty fucking hard on because a version I found so upsetting was in circulation. If it was just tags, I’d have blocked, but it being an addition is different. I don’t think asking people not to make my posts about it is “policing what other people do on the internet”. You’re in MY house, on MY post with MY art I spent hours on. Making additions to art posts already seems somewhat rude to me, that’s just not something you do, but I guess that’s a matter of the corner of tumblr culture you’re used it.

Also, their response felt very aggressive and condescending. They implied I was, like, a kid, and I do think I’m somewhat younger than them, but the only information about my age in my bio at the time was that I’m an adult, so it felt like a rude assumption. My age doesn’t have anything to do with it.

Again, though, I do absolutely see how my initial message could read as entitled. During the rest of our messaging, I did lose my temper a little bit at one point; I said something about how I’ve had to deal with shit in this fandom before, and I don’t remember the exact words since, again, we both blocked each other, but I know I swore at them. That might’ve come across as more aggressive than I wanted, and probably didn’t exactly help deescalate. (Can’t say for sure, I don’t have their side of the story)

Like I said, this situation was a bit ago now, but it upset me pretty bad at the time, and I’m still not entirely sure who’s in the wrong. So, AITA?

(Also to get ahead of this: please don’t make this about shipcourse in the comments. It’s not about that. They and I have similar opinions on that discourse from what I’ve gathered anyway. Thanks.)

What are these acronyms?

[deathworlders-of-e24]

Danny, Security Chief

Part 4

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

<Open File>

<{Possible Security Threats}>

• Theta Raider attack; 23% likely

• Grite of the Sed

• Elizabeth Collins^

~Addendum: Liz Collins and 3 possibly hostile infant alien lifeforms she’s keeping as pets~

<{(expand file?)}>

Security Chief Danny Ducane had started keeping a list of possible risks to the Noah after the disastrous mission to MX13, off the main servers of course. He kept it on his private computer in his quarters, away from prying eyes and probes, something like a journal more than an official log.

He clicked the expansion and began to dictate:

“While the Sed man Grite has been relegated to inactive duty aboard the ship, the situation is becoming increasingly complicated. Several times I have seen the other Sed crewmen in compromising places, though it seems inauspicious to the rest of the security team. After I caught Communications Officer Soane observing me leaving the Bridge, I’ve also seen Kor and Taren, both engineers, in odd locations around the ship where there has been no request for repairs or upgrades. I’ve kept my findings to myself out of fear of accused paranoia, and my own self policing. I’m positive they’re watching me. But whether or not they have ulterior motives or are just pissed I fired their buddy, I’m still not sure. Further investigating is required.

On another note, my information request was confirmed by Admiral Townes. Despite the fact that the Noah was human made, with GAIL assistance, and that the experiment was posed by the Quintins in the first place, the Sed representative on the GAIL council apparently made a big stink about the Sed not having any command positions on board. Townes said they wanted the Captain position, Security Chief, and communications lead all filled with their own species, but the requirements weren’t met by anyone they’d selected for the mission. Therefore they just ended up as grunts under these ‘lesser’ species. Sounds like a bunch of political posturing, they got what they got and threw a fit anyway. Townes said they don’t take kindly to orders from races they deem… incompatible. So there’s that too, I guess, bigots in space. I’m just hoping we can hit the halfway mark and get relief personnel before this thing we got brewing goes nuclear. Signing off.”

Danny clicked the computer off and stretched his arms above his head, his back popping twice. Between alien encounters and solar flares, the ship was getting more… noisy. Active. Danny didn’t like it. Boring was best. Boring meant nobody was dying. He’d had had a feeling in the pit of his stomach for the last dozen cycles or so, something was coming.

And it was probably gonna piss him off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Danny made the bridge at 0900 hours the next morning, slapping his ball cap on his head and a cup of coffee in his hands. He nodded to the bridge crew before turning to the captain, who looked at him with his ant like head cocked to one side.

“Chief Ducane, I believe it’s your day off duty, is it not?”

“It is, yeah, but it’s not like I can leave the ship unattended. Anything could happen,” Danny said, raising his cup to gesture.

“Speaking of, anything new boss?” he asked.

“Actually yes,” Skitch said, his multifaceted eyes catching the light and glowing like an oil slick. “We got an alert about an hour ago, something breached our forward perimeter for a minute before jumping away. We think it was a ship of sorts, but the scanners couldn’t tell anything definitive before it ran away.”

Danny thought for a moment, taking a sip of coffee.

“Could be pirates,” he said finally, “but if it was an hour ago and they haven’t come back, they probably aren’t a sizable force if a ship this small scared them off. Still, I recommend putting everyone on tactical alert for the time being, just to be safe.”

Skitch nodded, antenna bobbing.

“Good idea. Now please, go rest. The medical staff told me you humans have to sleep for at least 10 hours a cycle or you don’t function correctly, and you barely get 6 with the amount of work you do.”

“Don’t worry about me Captain,” Danny said, laughing, “I’m perfectly capable of functioning on just 6 hours, even less with enough coffee.”

“Regardless, this is your assigned rest period. You’re supposed to relax today, so I don’t want to see you until the next cycle,” Skitch ordered. “You’re no good to the ship if-”

One of the consoles started beeping, cutting the Captain off. It was coming from the long range scanners, the communications officer cycling through the information as fast as she could.

“Sir, we’re picking up a distress call from the other side of the system, a merchant vessel is under attack!”

“Who is it?”

“Signal corresponds to a Muruzian ship the GAIL has on file, they’re taking fire.”

“Helmsman, set a course, best possible speed!” Skitch ordered. “Chief Ducane, your off day is canceled.”

“Way ahead of you captain,” Danny said, downing his coffee and turning his cap around. “Let’s go to work.”

Danny turn on his heel and booked off the bridge and back towards the lift. As he moved, he unclipped the comm-link from his hip and made the call:

“Attention Alpha Team, we have a situation. Body armor and weapons, meet in the hangar bay in 5 minutes. Bravo Team are on call for support and possible rescue. We are heading to aid friendlies and fuck up enemies, move your asses.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Danny hit the hangar bay in 4 minutes flat, even after making a stop at his quarters to grab his personal kit. Homet, Coola, Ritz, and Hayte were all there, strapping on their gear with solemn looks on their faces. Danny knew Homet had seen a firefight before, but the others had only fought in simulated battles. Danny trusted them to do their jobs, but worried what the job would do to them in turn. In any event, he could always step in to cover them.

Get your head on soldier, Danny thought, you lead them into it and out. Burn bridges after you crossed them.

“Ready in 60 seconds people, the bridge said the distress signal cut out so the enemy probably took over the controls. We have friendlies under attack so we’re gonna lend a hand. Now remember, the Muruzians aren’t exactly a sturdy race, and they look avian in nature,” Danny explained, showing an image on his data pad of the species. They looked like bipedal birds, with long legs and necks, plumage around the head and base of their extremities. Short wings extended from their backs, with a span over 3 meters across at their full length.

“These are civilians, not soldiers, so it’s up to us to save them. Readings on the aggressor’s ship indicate it’s probably pirates, so shoot to stun anything that shoots at you first. Seriously. Just stun. We don’t have a full crew manifest for the Muruzian ship so no spray and pray, got it? Don’t want anybody the Muruzians are friends with to get shot just ‘cause they don’t have wings.”

“About half of that didn’t make sense sir, but set everything to stun and let loose right?” Hayte said, smirking.

“Just stun anything that isn’t a tall turkey, got it?” Danny said, stepping into the shuttle. “Fall in, we’re going for a ride!”

The security force piled into the shuttle and the hatch closed behind them, pressurizing the cabin. The pilot got the all clear from hangar control, and the bay doors opened up in front of them. Danny heard Hayte behind him quietly ask Homet what a turkey was, and then they were off, into the void, hurtling towards a firefight.

“Alright guys, here’s the plan,” Danny began, “scans show their shuttle bay is wide open, so we’re going in there and securing a beach head. From there, we sweep floor by floor with scanners looking for life signs while going up to the bridge, taking out any hostiles we find or rescuing any of the Muruzians we encounter. We find anyone, one of us escorts them back to the shuttle bay for safety. Bravo Team is gonna be right behind us for recoveries, so once the friendlies are safe we regroup. Got it?”

“Got it sir,” Coola answered, though there was a slight stutter in her voice. The others didn’t respond, just nodded. Homet cocked his rifle, the weapon whirring as it powered up.

“Good to go, Chief,” he said.

“Okay, let’s do this right people,” Danny said, sending the same orders to Bravo Team through his comm-link. The shuttle was almost to the bay, and Danny could see the Muruzian ship in the distance, blocky and oblong at the same time, almost kind of egg shaped. Its thrusters were dead and dark. Just beside it was another ship, maybe a fourth the size, but clearly built for speed and maneuverability, almost like an arrow head in shape, though still smaller than the Noah.

Their shuttle came to a stop inside the Muruzian ship’s bay, just inside the air field generator. The pilot gave the signal, releasing the hatch. Danny was first out the door, sweeping from side to side with his rifle, head on a swivel. There was already another shuttle in the hangar, arrow shaped like the enemy ship. This was how they got in it seemed. They hadn’t seen any lifeforms on the scans of this area, but you never know what technology could miss. What you didn’t know could so easily kill you. The rest of them poured out of the shuttle and began securing the bay.

“Clear!” Homet called out, followed by the Quintin siblings, then Hayte.

“All clear!” Danny called, clicking on the radio in his ear piece. “Bravo Team, the beach head is secure, make your entry and prepare to receive injured friendlies and restrained enemies. We’re moving out.”

Alpha Team formed up at the exit, Homet on point with Danny right behind him. Hayte was in the rear, calling out possible life signs with the scanner, and the twins on lookout, just like they trained for.

“Got three signals on the next floor chief,” Hayte said as they made their way through the hangar floor. “But I don’t know how we’re going to get there, the ship doesn’t have stairs or any lifts.”

“Yeah, the Muruzians are an avian species,” Homet said, “they just fly and glide between floors.”

“Well they have to have maintenance shafts somewhere,” Danny said. “Somewhere they can stand and move between levels. Broaden the scan parameters, find any space that can fit us that can get to other floors.”

Hayte clicked some buttons and held the scanner up high above his head. Behind them, the Bravo Team shuttle landed in the hangar.

“Got something Chief, 20 meters ahead and to the left, service shaft. Looks like an air duct, but we can even get Homet in there if he crouches.”

“Good. Let’s move people,” Danny ordered. The team booked, staying in formation. They made their way down the hall toward the shaft, then pried open the doors. The duct went upwards at a 45 degree angle. Danny and Homet turned and gave a look to the other three, the lizards and the monkey.

“When we get back to the ship,” Danny began, “we’re gonna have a talk about the abilities of different species, okay?”

Going up was slow going. Danny’s legs were aching before they were halfway up, and Homet’s fur was making friction a problem. The Twins and Hayte had to brace themselves behind him and push while the Doun used the exposed skin on his hands to try and get traction. It took significantly longer than Danny wanted, but they had no choice.

Finally, they made it out the top end, Danny and Homet tumbling out onto the floor.

“Well that sucked,” Danny said, forcefully bending his spine back into shape. The more limber species on the team simply stepped out into the hall, trying to keep from laughing at their two more burly teammates.

“Get back in formation,” Danny ordered. “Bunch of kids, I swear.”

They made their way through the ship, Hayte directing them with the scanner. Finally they came up on a door and the Indoprime stopped them. He pointed to the door and held up 3 fingers on his furred hand.

“One Muruzian bio sign,” he said reading the device. “Two others that read as Tulane.”

“Crap,” Danny said. The Tulane were pretty well known for their techno-dependencies. They augmented themselves with whatever they could salvage from raid runs in other systems, so they didn’t have any real average appearance to attribute their species to anymore. Just lots of metal and weapons wrapped in flesh. A race of cyborgs.

“On three,” Danny said quietly, hand on the door. Homet got into position, the others behind him.

1…

2…

3!

Danny threw open the door and ducked aside as the big burly Doun charged in, his thermal suit making him a tank with tusks. The Tulane didn’t even have a chance to fire, Homet and Danny stunned them the second they were in line of sight. The team poured into the room, clearing corners and spreading out to cover any possible angle of attack.

They the coast was clear. Danny lowered his rifle and walked calmly over to the friendly alien bird. They appeared to be female, with light gray plumage and darker accents. Their beak was shaking, but despite that, Danny realized that if they stood up they’d be as tall as he was.

“Are you alright?” He asked.

“SQUAWWK!” Said the Muruzian, and Danny waited a moment for the translator to kick in.

[Who are you? Are you here to help us? Please save us!]

“Don’t worry, we’re GAIL officers from the ship Noah, we’re here to help,” Danny said, trying to calm them down.

“Bawk? Squawk.”

[What? I can’t understand you, they destroyed my translator]

“Shit,” Danny said. “Ritz, give her your translator, Coola can interpret for you.”

The Quintin man gave the alien bird lady his device, then made a hissing sound. The Muruzian synced it to her ear.

“Better?” Danny asked.

“Much,” she said. “My name is Lith, thank you for coming. The Tulane came out of nowhere, we were boarded before we knew what was going on.”

“How’d they get on board?” Homet asked.

“They fired a directed EMP burst, completely fried our ship. We got back-up power going for life support, but that could go out any minute.”

“Okay Lith, we’re gonna get you to safety, but first you gotta tell us how many crew you still have on the ship so we can save them too,” Danny said.

“There’s only 50 of us in the flock, but some of them were in the hangar when they boarded. They… didn’t make it.” Lith gave a very sad sounding chirp. “The others were locked on the cargo decks. The only reason they didn’t get me too was because I was hiding. They left them in cargo and brought a few back up to the bridge.”

“Okay Lith, these two” Danny pointed to the twins, “are gonna get you to the hangar bay where our friends are gonna keep you safe, okay? All you gotta do is take a quick slide down that air duct over there, alright?”

“Thank you, thank you so much,” Lith said, squawking. Danny sent a quick message on the comm-link, ‘one incoming friendly, more in the cargo bay with hostiles, go get them’, and they were off. The twins taking Lith down and Danny, Homet, and Hayte continuing forward, securing the floor.

After a few minutes, Ritz and Coola were back, and the three of them had swept the floor for any surprises. Finding none, they moved on.

Another duct led up to the next floor, and Danny wasn’t having it after that. His legs and back ached, and watching the younger teammates effortlessly climb up was annoying. He was almost thankful when they encountered the band of Tulane pirates. At least it’d be longer now between climbs.

The group they encountered could not be said to all be the same species at first glance. For one, one of them was half the size of the other nine, and had a blaster for a hand. For two, the tallest of the group was see through, as in it looked like his torso had been replaced with bionics without any casing. Danny could see the wiring hanging down where organs should be as well as the wall behind it. Danny could see the thing’s ribs and spine, dripping what looked like motor oil.

Wow, fuck that noise, Danny thought.

“Light ‘em up!” Danny said, taking the opening shot. The first cyborg took the stun directly to the face, dropping like a sack of rocks. Homet took the next two, the energized bolt frying their circuits as they went down. Then it was all out war. Both sides fired wildly, but the Alpha Team had the element of surprise. The whole skirmish lasted less than 30 seconds. The last three took multiple stuns, twitching on the ground. Their cybernetics sparked and whirred, which would have been concerning if they weren’t pirate scumbags.

“Bravo Team, I got a present for you. 9 stunned hostiles, second floor from the hangar. Send medical and mechanical assistance. These guys are gonna stand trial for this, so make sure they don’t die.”

Danny turned back to his team, but something caught his eye.

The Tulane had jump packs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Oh I’m keeping this!” Homet exclaimed as they made the leap to the next floor, a whopping 20 meters up from the floor they’d left the unconscious pirates. Danny said nothing, but grinned at his friend. This was significantly easier on his back.

Plus it made him feel cool as fuck.

They made it to the next floor in record time, and cleared it just as fast. It seemed the center of the ship was hallow, a long empty shaft spanning the length of the ship, allowing the Muruzians easy access to the whole of the ship by flying or gliding to any floor they chose. Alpha Team was making use of it as well now, the jump packs strapped to each of them. Danny almost lost his cap at first, but by the sixth floor he was a natural at it. It was just like parachuting through the air, only in reverse.

They encountered a few more small groups of Tulane, but Danny took them out almost effortlessly, and with extreme efficiency. The rest of the team hardly had to do anything, Danny was systematically taking out every hostile they came across. If things kept up like this, he could keep everyone safe.

All in all, things were going well.

That was, until they reached the bridge.

The doors to the bridge looked as if they’d been blown open. They hung there, half retracted into the wall, wrenched into the room from what looked like concussive force. Danny could hear yelling in an alien language even from out in the hall, but they were too far away for his translator to make any sense of the words. He held his hand up and made a fist, signaling everyone to hold. They formed up on the entrance on the left side of the ruined door. Danny ducked his head and peeked in.

The Muruzian crew were huddled together in the corner, the Tulane looming over them with blades and blasters. One of the birds was kneeling in the center of the room before what appeared to Danny as just a hulking mass of metal on legs. Then he realized…

Aw fuck me

…it was a battle suit. Hydraulic muscles encased in oversized metal plating. Like a tank with an attitude. Danny had only seen one once before, during Academy training. He’d watched, uncomfortably scared, as a soldier in such a suit had punched a Humvee through a concrete wall.

The Muruzians never had a chance.

Neither did they, in all likelihood.

“Is that what I think it is?” Homet asked.

“Yeah,” Danny said, swallowing.

“What would a human say right now?”

“Fuck works.”

“Fuck then.”

“Stuns won’t get through that plating. And the birds aren’t gonna last a second if they decide to just wipe them out. Any plans?” Hayte asked.

The rest of the team just looked at him blankly.

“Fuck,” Coola said, unhelpfully shrugging.

Danny looked back into the bridge room, desperate for anything that might spark an idea, even a bad one would work.

4 hostiles.

1 in a tank.

Lots of friendlies.

Danny looked up above the battle suit. The roof had taken damage, the remains of a light source hanging from the ceiling. Wires sparked and embers fluttered down.

Maybe that could work?

“Okay, here’s the play. Twins and Hayte, take out the 3 by the hostages. Keep to stuns in case you miss. Homet, watch their backs. I’m gonna swap to scattershot and shoot the ceiling right above the suit, try to dislodge those wires and zap the bastard. That’ll distract him or drop something heavy on him, either works. Okay? On 3.”

Coola and Ritz looked like they wanted to protest, but he wasn’t paying attention anymore.

Danny counted.

1 prayer.

2 prayers.

Fuck it.

3!

Danny burst into the room first, screaming and shooting, which was fair since he’d probably get ripped to shreds first. The rest of the team came in a beat later, ducking to the side and firing at the pirates. It took one extra shot to knock out the guards, as Danny fired boiling plasma buckshot into the ceiling. There was a quick BOOMF!! as a an electrical explosion fried the wiring in the roof. Sparks and melted carbon rained down on the battle suit, and Danny could hear muffled screaming coming from the inside as the super heated shrapnel made its way into the seams. The battle suit flailed its arms and spun around to face them, weapon raised. Homet dove left, firing into its side, doing barely anything. Danny went wide to the right, trying to confuse it. Everything was moving in slow motion to him, himself included. The battle suit, his teammates, the scared Muruzians. Everything except his brain. That was firing on all cylinders, adrenaline coursing through his body, his mind desperate to come up with a way to get everyone else out alive.

His back felt heavy.

And then he realized, there was a better way.

Danny charged the battle suit as it turned to face him, firing as he ran. When he was right on top of it, he dropped and slid between its legs. It bent over to look for him, but Danny was already climbing up its back, strapping his jump pack to its side and wedging his rifle under some wires on the other. He brought his fist down on the pack, and the Tulane shot to the side, throwing Danny to the floor.

If Danny couldn’t take out the suit, all he had to do was scramble the guy inside.

“EVERYONE GET DOWN!” He ordered, quick as he could before the suit slammed into the side of the wall, crushing the plasma rifle and detonating the small core that powered it.

The sound was deafening, even with the battle suit taking the brunt of the explosion. It sounded like a train had rammed into the side of their heads going at full speed. Danny got thrown into the opposite wall from the force, as well as several of the Muruzians and Homet. The rest were scattered across the room, battered, bruised, and some a little burnt. But everyone was alive, including the three Tulane they’d stunned, which was a small miracle in and of itself.

“Chief, what’s a human word that’d work for right now?” Ritz asked, lying on his back in the corner with a giant bird man on top of him.

“Fuck still works,” Danny said.

“Fuuuuuuck then,” Ritz groaned. “I think my tail is broken.”

“What the hell were you doing Ducane?” Homet asked angrily. “No real plan, and then that?”

“Yeah, not pushing back on that one,” Danny admitted. “That sucked, and I’m sorry. But how else do you take down a battle suit?”

Danny walked over to the wrecked suit crumpled in the wall, pulling his pistol just to be safe. The thing sparked and a motor somewhere creaked, but he couldn’t see any signs of life coming from it. He banged on the head with the butt of his gun. It clanged dully.

Then the arm shot out and clamped around Danny’s waist. He could feel his bones grinding together under the strength of the metal claw wrapped around him. Hot metal seared his skin where his armor and clothes got burned away.

Danny shouted in alarm before the suit pulled him in, putting him face to face with the Tulane. The helmet visor flipped up and Danny was looking into the eyes of the raider inside.

Damn was he ugly.

Half melted orange flesh poured over the cybernetics in their face, their eyes bloodshot and twitching in all directions. Pipes and wiring were sticking out of their deformed neck. They tried to croak out words but the translator didn’t register it as a language.

Danny panicked and unloaded the whole clip into the Tulane’s face. At that close a range with no barrier, the ballistic force of Danny’s Terran firearm splattered the alien’s brains across the wall and much on Danny himself.

“FUCK!” Danny screamed. “God damnit, I didn’t… he caught be by surprise, I didn’t mean to fire lethals.”

“You killed a pirate Ducane, nobody is gonna be too upset about that,” Homet said. “What we are mad about is that you ran in half cocked without working out a plan with us.”

“Chief, you charged right at a battle suit with no way to survive it,” Coola said. Ritz and Hayte were tending to the Muruzians. “You completely disregarded any help we could’ve given you. Fuck!”

“Okay I think we’re over using that word now,” Danny said, prying himself out of the suit’s grip. He wiped his face, trying to get the blood smears out of his hair. “Truthfully, I didn’t think of that until the fight had started, but… yeah, okay, you guys are right. I should’ve got back-up first.”

“You do all this work for us Chief, training us like Terran soldiers, but then you don’t let us be part of the team when it counts. Why not?” Coola crossed her arms and looked him in the eye, her tail whipping back and forth angrily.

“I don’t know…” Danny started, but Homet cut him off.

“Chief, this is the first real combat situation we’ve all experienced together, and I have to say, we failed as a team. You did almost all the work, which isn’t to say you did a bad thing, but we don’t need Ducane the Destroyer right now, we need Chief Ducane to lead us, to make the plan and to trust us. Better, we need the Chief Ducane who trusts himself, who knows he did a good job training us.”

Danny wiped his hands stained with purple blood on his pants and looked at the team, his team, and realized they were right. He trained them, he knows their strengths and weaknesses, and knew he’d done a great job at turning them into marines.

So why had he taken on so much himself today?

“You humans don’t need to save us every time, you know?” Ritz said, walking over.

“You’re right,” Danny conceded. “I got it in my head that it was my job alone to keep everybody on the ship safe, including you all. I can see I need to work on that.” Danny nodded towards the Muruzians in the corner. “Let’s get them down to the shuttles and get back to the ship, yeah?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Noah was ordered to stay in the vicinity until a relief ship could come and take care of the Muruzians, their ship, and take the Tulane into custody. The bird peoples were given guest quarters on board the Noah until then, taking several hours for them all to get processed and translators. Danny was back in his office, going through the metric ton of data they’d taken from the Tulane ship when Homet walked in.

“Sir… Danny, I think we need to talk.”

Danny looked up at him and sighed.

“Look, I heard you guys loud and clear, no more solo acts, promise.”

“No, I don’t think you’re really hearing us. You took on everything by yourself today. I might’ve been on point, but you were still somehow first in the door. Our job is to keep the ship safe. Our job is to walk into the fire. Your job is to get us out the other side. And you can’t do that every time with this wanton disregard for your own well being.” Homet took a breath.

“I talked to the Captain,” he said.

“Homet, what did you-”

“Tomorrow it is mandatory you stay out of your office and take a real day off.” Homet grinned at him. “Captain’s orders.”

Danny just sat there looking at him for a minute before busting out laughing.

“Jackass, you had me worried for a minute there. Alright, fine, less coffee, more beer, yeah? You come get a drink with me after your shift. You’re in charge of the kids then.”

“Aye aye, Chief,” Homet said, joining him in laughter. “You humans might be the weirdest species I’ve ever met, but even you guys have to rest every once in a while.”

“Only when you make us, apparently.”

[jjcre8]

✩˚｡⋆ 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐌𝐀𝐍: 𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐇𝐀𝐌 𝐀𝐒𝐘𝐋𝐔𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.

below is a list of dialogue said by various characters , including villains , guards & doctors , & The Batman himself. this dialogue was gathered from the game wiki page , & compiled into a list for easy access & use. feel free to change names & pronouns as needed. do not add to the list , & always reblog from the source.

TW DISCLAIMER. this meme may contain potentially triggering content , pertaining to care of patients in the batman franchise.

" How did he get out? I mean, you're here and... "

" Some loyalty! Do you need any help? "

" You and your men are safer here. I'll find you if I need anything. "

" I saw the alert, what's wrong? Where are you? "

" I don't get it. This place is supposed to be secure. "

" Unfortunately, some of the patients will always try and escape. I'll stop them. "

" Thanks for the concern, officer, but it will take more than guns to stop me. "

" I'll take care of this. "

" Thanks. Let me know if you need backup. "

" Exactly. He's left me a trail to follow. He's alive. "

" You wait here. I'll be back. "

" You heard the lady. We've got another psycho on the way. "

" Keep your weapons trained on it at all times. "

" It's my favourite show. I'm Warden Idiot, You'll Never Escape'. "

" Just gotta check your prisoner. "

" You have to listen to me! It's a mistake. I didn't do it! "

" I've waited a long time for this, Bats. Let's start the party. With a BANG. "

" I think you need a little more...! Tell me, what demons do you have left to beat? Shall we see? "

" This isn't a simple escape attempt. Joker's been planning this. "

" Please help me! "

" You're going to be fine. Stay here. "

" Batman's here! Just hold on a little longer! "

" I want all the doctors rounded up. Search every inch of the Medical building. I mean it. "

" La la la la lu lu lu la! Hey! Scram, Bats! This is my me time. "

" Shut it and get down there with the others. MOVE IT!! "

" Batman's as good as dead. "

" The medical building is ours. No one's takin' it from us. "

" I can't wait to get outta here. This hospital scares the crap out of me. "

" Man, I hate the smell of hospitals. "

" Ain't hospitals supposed to be clean? This place stinks. "

" The room's clear. You're safe now. "

" Did they have anyone with them? "

" They took someone into the elevator, I couldn't tell who it was. "

" We'll be fine. "

" What about the others? We heard gunfire. They could be dead. "

" Batman, we've got another problem. "

" Why are you doing this? I have done exactly as you've asked "

" Look at me, you think I care? Stop your whining and listen good. "

" Keep quiet. I'm not sure how much more of your yapping I can take. "

" Bad publicity will effect his campaign for Mayor. "

" Don't speak. You're safe now. "

" What are you waiting for?! April Fools' day?! Get down there! "

" HE'S HERE! "

" Yeah. Big Bad Batman. C'mon, tough guy, come and get us. "

" Oh. Look at him, stuck out there. Ain't ya got a cat to rescue from a tree or something? "

" Yeah, that's right. Go on. Get lost. We're in control. "

" Is he dead? "

" I think so. "

" You may wanna do a quick head count. "

" BABOOM! Another one bites the dust. "

" Batman's as good as dead. "

" Yeah. Give us orders and then sit in your nice safe room while we fight Batman. Nice... "

" Batman? Can you hear me? Show yourself! "

" Oh, I'd like to thank my fans for their undying support, and the people of Gotham, who I will be seeing very soon. "

" I salute my fallen enemy. "

" Oh. Isn't that cute. Little Bat's a-sleepin'. Someone finsh him off. "

" That loser didn't stand a chance. I mean, look at me. "

" Gotta say. I thought you'd last longer. "

" Loser, Loser, Loser! "

" Bye bye, Bats! "

" Once again I have defeated you, Batman! "

" I will enjoy feasting on your bones. "

" Tick, tock. Feed the Croc. "

" And at the end of fear, oblivion. "

" Now madness takes you, forever. "

" You're dead and buried, darling. "

" Sorry, love, you're plucked. "

[yooniesim]

Statement from Overwolf

...Okay, first of all, this whole statement is sadly nothing but them taking the same exact route as before: misdirecting & changing the narrative to only be about "victims" when their Home Support initiative is partnered with the ILF, an openly Zionist organization. This isn't about innocent parties only when they're partnered with an organization that contributes directly towards IDF Military Intelligence. All of the money from the fund goes to the ILF's bank account to distribute, per their own FAQ page. And even without that, the association alone is enough to boycott. Overwolf and Curseforge cannot be "clean of politics" while their CEO partners with and therefore directly supports Zionist parties.

Screenshots directly from Home Support website & ILF website

This statement overall stinks because it puts the blame fully onto people with legitimate concerns by calling them all harassers. Have some people gone too far towards creators? 100%. I know that well. But Overwolf is clearly using that to deflect off of themselves, and this is why it never should have been done in the first place. Y'all focused on the wrong shit- the smaller targets instead of the big ones, and the wrong claim that they're directly funding the IDF with CF revenue, and now they're doing exactly what I said they would: once again using the fact that that's not technically true to weasel out of people's concerns. They even directly call out the fact that it's misinformation like I said they would! They clarified fucking nothing, they repeated the same shit they already said because they know they can. We need to change the focus of the boycott so that they are forced to address their actual wrongdoing! Stop spending all your time sending threatening messages on anon and instead spread factual information with sources and reach out to creators in good faith effort to get them to speak without the fear of being attacked. They will stay silent as long as the negative consequences (financially & socially) is all on them and not Overwolf & EA.

I'm still working on a comprehensive post with everything, but in the meantime, please spread this post around.