#i hate the fancy beasts films but at least they give me her and made me finally realise he's actually h*t so there's that.

[nikolaj-costerwaldau]

giffing katherine waterston and colin farrell today,,,, truly feels like i'm back in 2016 lads 😔

[originalwinnercheesecake]

First Impressions and predictions based on the coven Leaders

After a full first season their fame adorning the banners and walls, who they are being hailed, yet they themselves being kept in the shadows we now get first looks (and throughout 2a will meet) the emperors top dogs: The coven leaders. I will not lie as a group... these guys dissappoint me. Making the majority of them very human in appearance for me is a big no. Compare this group to the many colorful and fantastical creatures that are shown teaching at hexside and the hexside teachers are far more creative, unique, and fun. Maybe the artists decided to make the coven leaders look more like normal people so the audience would have an easier time understanding their expressions and body language. Maybe the more humanoid whitches are a higher class and have a easier time climbing higher than the more beast and demon like residence.? We will have to wait and see. 

Seperate this group into individuals (like how we will hopefully meet them) and most of them become far more interesting, So below lets take a look at each coven leader individually, where the artists may have taken inspriation, and what  What kind of characters they could maybe turn out to be.

The Beast keeping coven Leader: One of the only two that are not humanoids. What type of animal is he? At first I was sure he was a hedgehog, but maybe he could also be like a chipmunk or a squirrel. I get the feeling he might be partially inspired by Sonic from Sega. I was really into Sonic back in middle school. I liked the cartoons and read through the archie’s old comic series. But I kinda out grew him since then. I know from helping to take care of kids though that he is still popular with the younger generation. That’s kinda how I thin the Beast Keeping Coven leader will be: less interesting for older viewers, but a real fun charcter for kids.

The Healing coven leader: Now this guy looks like fun villain all around. Is some kind of witch docotor? a Dark Priest? The size the purple Grin, he looks like the phantom boss from those horror films where you get trapped in nightmares. Tell me he has scary theme song music and talks in a very high pitched voice. I’ve heard some people wonder if he could be Selena (oracle girl from hexside)’s dad. I don’t thinks so, the macaroni crescent shape n his head looks more like a fancy cowl than part of his actual head. Also him having a daughter in Luz’s class could be used as a reason for him to change sides, I want this guy to stay as a villian/antagonist. We all know that with this size group some will stay with the emperor and some will defect to Luz’s side (possibility a couple will die, we haven’t seen yet just how dark Dana is willing to go). Personally my view with redemption arcs and if a character “deserves them” is it depends on what it will do for the story/character afterwards? IF redeeming them opens more doors for the characters and directions the story can take, do it. IF it closes doors leave them as they are. I absolutely hate when clever and well written bad guys get “redeemed” in to boring, plot useless, weebs. The only reason I could see having this guy change sides is for him to “cure” Eda and Lilith’s curse, and I would much rather see the two of them gain control over their forms than be “cured” of them.

The Illusion coven leader: Another fun looking antagonist. My third favorite of these nine. If the healer guy is horror movie based. This guy is Disney based all around. Looks like one of those Vegas suave showmen styled character. Love it. I guarantee you he does not actually look that young or slicked back, but is using illusion magic to make himself more pretty. Not sure if he will stay with the emperor or not. Illusion is Gus’s track and I could see Dana having the leaders of Luz’s friends tracks be the ones to stand by them. If so I am fine with that (in the case of the abomination leader I will beg for it). Gaining the respect of someone as high up as a coven leader could be really great for Gus’s character. Just as long as I get plenty of laughs from Gus and this guy both along the way.

The Potion coven leader: My second favorite and in my opinion the most creative idea of the whole bunch. A mosquito that works in potions! Does he suck them up with his nose and carry them in.. whatever it is mosquitos store blood in. Also he looks angry. Like everyone else is either amused or board. This guy is fed up and ready to do something about it. Not sure if it is the Emperor, the other leaders, or the owl gang he is mad at, but it should be a worthwhile show down.

The Abomination coven leader: Yes this is my favorite design. Yes it is because he is such a beautiful man. Would never have expected someone who creates mucks (the pokemon) with legs would be so fine. Its more than that though. He looks the most kind. Their is no malice or guise in his smile and his green eyes are bright and relaxed. I wondered what the purpose of the Abomination track was and why it had “more opportunity” all last season. Well slight spoilers if you haven’t seen episode 2x02 it is the industrialist field. When you learn about Industrialization usually the idea is that it is done to help the human race reach its full potential, and it is up to each individual to decide what to do with that potential. Whether you call that the passion of a creative mind or the carelessness of a fool would also be up to you. But I really don’t want this guy to be all bad. If for no other reason that more spoilers for episode 2 * with the interest/caution the emperor is showing the blights I expect this guy to show up to their house, probably meet Amity, and we really do not need another not so nice adult in her life. She has had enough.

The Oracle coven leader: What is this? He’s got nails/caws at the ends of dread thingys like Kikimore, so is this her father? Does he have anything to do with her being in the Emporor’s coven? But this is my least favorite. Like what was the inspiration behind this guy? With so many legendary oracles in mythology and we get this guy who mostly looks saggy, washed out, tierd, and just Blah. Hope thier is more to him, but here is one who I am not holding my breath for an episode on.

The Plant coven leader: based on her banner I was expecting something like the Swamp Giant from ALTA. Instead they went in the direction of a very traditional witch desgine: An old women with a wrinkled face and really messy hair, who probably lives alone in the woods, with maybe the exception of a cat, and dances around a fire at night. Okay. She is definitely going to become an ally of the owl gang. This is the only female of the group,and it is neither in Dana’s message nor would it be popular with her target audience to make a villain or even an antagonist out of a women who managed to climb the later into a male dominated success level. I am actually looking forward to seeing her, because it will probably be in a Willow based episode, and after 2x02 (which I personally feel should not have been a luminaty episode but rather a Willow and Amity one finishing up their reconciliation arc), Willow deserves an episode with potential centered around her. An episode where she goes against the Plant track Leader would be that. This witches Grin isn’t exactly friendly, but its more mischievous than wicked. She gives off vibes as one of those people who like to test the mains, and if you pass her tests than you earn her respect. I have no doubt Willow could win at her little games, and doing so would be a huge boost the confidence she has spent the show building.

The Construction coven leader: Oh joy here’s the other one I am unimpressed with. Unlike with the Oracle guy I know where they got his design. To everyone saying that we first saw him at the convention, your not backing far enough up. If you have ever seen any cartoon ever where the main character wanders past or onto a construction sight you have seen this man. Every trio of workers sitting on a iron frame eating from a lunchbox. Every pig that makes a catcall at a disgusted women. Every exhausted worker who watches as your slapstick mains chase each other past at quitting time... they all looked EXACTLY like this guy. This is really the character leading the track Dana herself has said she would pick to join? They could have done a Golem made of brick an stone that resembles a palace. They could have done some kind of humanoid ant with super strength. They could have done a wizard with shapes and mathematics on his robe who carried a scroll everywhere that he compulsively scribbled blueprints onto. But instead we get Mr. Generic here.

The Bard coven Leader: This is R, Eda’s old friend from her hexside days. Did I save R for last because of this connection? Partially. I am also unsure what R’s pronouns are. To me R looks physically male. I have seen other posters use “she” when posting about R. One person posted that Dana had confirmed R uses “they” and if so awesome, I would really like to see that tweet. What ever R’s pronouns though their appearance in the show will be tied with Eda, er past, and what she had to give up in order to live free. I look forward to this new insight onto her character

[charliejrogers]

Klaus (2019) Review & Analysis

I remember recently discussing with my fiancée how, though there have undoubtedly been a number of Christmas movies released in the last twenty years, none have really risen to the level of a “classic” – something you would want to watch every year as part of a tradition. It’s true I have not seen it, but still something tells me that 2008’s Reese Witherspoon vehicle Four Christmases is not on anyone’s annual watchlist… nor 2017’s Mel Gibson-infested Daddy’s Home 2. We concluded that the last “classic” was 2003’s Elf. And, while Christmas movies don’t have to mention Jesus or religion obviously, please don’t try to tell me that Frozen is a Christmas movie… it’s not! In some ways, given how secular things are, I began to wonder if there even was a market for holiday family fun movies, but of course, I’m an idiot because you can just make a whole movie about Santa Claus. Move over, Jesus, we gotta talk about the reason for the season!

Klaus released last holiday season on Netflix and at least in Chicago I saw billboards for it everywhere. Netflix went all in on promoting this as the next big Christmas movie and had some moderate success; they even grabbed an Oscar nom for best animated picture. Unlike most animated films these days, Klaus was made by neither DreamWorks nor Disney, and it shows. It lacks the refined polish of a Disney/Pixar feature, but also has a heart unlike a DreamWorks picture. The animation style can be best described as a hybrid of 2D and 3D (yet not quite 2.5D). At times the character models look like classic hand-drawn 2D models set within a mostly computer-generated 3D environment. But at other times, they look more 3D. It’s confusing to describe, and inconsistent to watch. It often felt like I was watching a compromise between a studio that wanted a distinct animation style but didn’t have the budget to fully realize it. Still, more often the not it’s a pretty movie.

More than the raw visuals, the movie has a fantastic sense of atmosphere… perhaps even too much at the beginning. Klaus is, in one sense, the story about how a lonely woodsman becomes the legendary Santa Claus, but for such a jolly premise, much of the film is shrouded in shadows and dominated by an oppressive, cold, snowy bleakness. In retrospect, this makes sense as the true triumph of Santa and “Christmas spirit” can only be best appreciated when it brings light to the darkest of places and times. Still, upon first viewing, I was quite surprised and shocked by the dark atmosphere and downright violent imagery on display at the beginning of the film, so much so that I was wondering if this really was a Christmas movie!

The darkness stems from the fact that our woodsman Klaus lives deep within the forest on a far north island, far far from the closest village which is a town called Smeerensberg and is famous for its never ending feuding and wickedness. It’s a genuine Nineveh of the North so it seems. The town’s feud centers around two rivalling clans (the film’s equivalent of the Hatfields & McCoys) and every villager belongs to one clan or the other. The two families’ feuds go back longer than anyone can remember (cave paintings exist that depict their feud), implying an original sin of sorts with the town being more born from hatred than spawning it. Hatred is so foundational that it infects every part of society. Unwilling to allow children to interact with the rival clans in classrooms, children just don’t go to school. Instead, they roam the streets playing pranks on old people and stabbing snowmen with carrots.

For the most part, Klaus lives his life separate from and unbothered by these unruly residents of Smeerensberg. What breaks his solitude is the arrival of a new post officer to Smeerensberg. More than a trivial side character, this post officer, Jesper Johansson, is surprisingly the main character of this movie all about the origins of Santa Claus.

Much like the residents of Smeerensberg, we the audience come to the film with a primary misunderstanding, much of what makes Santa famous today (the home invasion via chimney, the responding to letters, the reindeer-pulled sleigh) were the creative inventions of a spoiler-brat-turned-postman. So despite this movie being about the origins of Santa Claus, being a Christmas movie, you should have guessed that this will be some variant on Dickens’ classic tale. Jesper isn’t a classic Scrooge in that he doesn’t abhor Christmas, but he is self-absorbed, materialistic, and all-around not a great guy. He’s the spoiled son of a successful postal worker who controls a postal empire that looks more like an army. (The true fantasy of this movie has nothing do with sleigh bells and stocking stuffers… it’s the idea that the post office is a well-organized, well-respected, successful enterprise.) Anyways, recognizing his own son’s worthlessness, Jesper’s father decides to whip him into shape, ship him off to the God-forsaken land of Smeerensberg with an ultimatum: Jesper must process 6,000 letters from the town of Smeerensberg in a year or else be cut off from his father’s wealth. The problem? With how ugly the feud is in Smeerensberg, no one needs to write a letter to express their feelings when a cold snowball to the face (or worse) will get the point across quite clearly.

So now with the spoiled postal heir longing for silk sheets as he tries to survive out in the cold boonies, the movie gets a hint of the Emperor’s New Groove flavor… sans llama. It is only by sheer “chance” (we’ll get to that) that when Jesper visits the woodsman in a last ditch effort to find one person on the island who wants to send a letter, a piece of paper falls out of Jesper’s bag as he flees in horror of the woodsman (we’ll get to that).  This piece of paper contains a drawing that a little boy made of himself locked in a high tower looking sad. In a very humorous scene, we had seen Jesper accidentally stumble across this drawing and then unsuccessfully try to scam the boy into giving him money so that Jesper could “mail” it back to him, rather than just give it back. Regardless, recognizing the little boy’s suffering, the woodsman decides to do something about it and enlists Jesper’s help. Luckily for the children of Smeerensberg, the woodsman has a barn full of toys. Yes, “a barn full of toys” is as creepy as that sounds and the films uses that creepiness to full effect when Jesper first meets the woodsman. The large, imposing, hooded, axe-bearing woodsman is far from the jolly fellow we know he is destined to become. He’s downright scary and given how violent the town of Smeerensberg is (Jesper almost dies when he first arrives because he’s tricked into ringing the war bell which sends the whole town into violent frenzy), we and Jesper are not wrong to assume the woodsman holds only ill-intentions. Essentially, the first meeting with the woodsman is supposed to be something akin to the reveal of the Beast in 1991’s Beauty & the Beast, a film so scary it sent my then two-year-old sister running out of theater in tears. Ultimately, I can’t speak for the mind of a child, but the tension for me here is certainly lessened by the fact that… well… we know the woodsman is Santa Claus. So even though Jesper is scared shitless and flees after meeting the woodsman, we know that there will be more to their story.

Still, even if not necessarily scary, the film does successfully shroud the woodsman in mystery, and his backstory is slowly and beautifully revealed throughout the film. I won’t spoil it here, but the script does a fantastic job of contextualizing the woodman’s stoic and aloof nature and explaining why that barn is so full of toys. The explanations come naturally and speak to a real human pain that I was not expecting from this film. In terms of emotion, the woodsman’s backstory almost reaches the opening montage to Up. ALMOST, I said, so put down the pitchforks!

So Jesper and the woodsman team up to deliver a present to that first child from the drawing. Or more accurately, the woodsman throws Jesper down a chimney to deliver a present while the woodsman looks on. The ensuing scene when the boy opens his present brought tears to my eyes. The woodsman (and we with him) watching the pure joy of a child receiving a present is truly nostalgic in its most literal sense. It hurts to see such joy, remembering that at one time you too could feel such joy from a hunk of plastic, and knowing you will never feel that way again. It’s a joy that few films outside of A Christmas Story with its the red rider BB gun really nail. Anyways, the little boy sees the woodsman through the window and finds his original drawing of himself locked in the tower which the woodsman leaves behind by accident. He surmises that the postman had devliered his drawing to the woodsman, and the woodsman responded with a present.

After that… well the rumor spreads wildly of the mysterious woodsman who comes down chimneys at night to give presents to children in response to letters. Now, the once dormant post office becomes a bustling hub of activity as children from all over flock to send letters to this Mr. Klaus. Kids even beg to go to school so that they can learn to write in order to get presents (much to the dismay of the disilliusioned teacher who long ago gave up on her dreams of teaching in a town where no child goes to school and had turned to being a fishmonger in order to pay the bills and one day afford to leave the town for good).

Gradually the children, who seemingly had no toys prior to Klaus and Jesper’s escapades, now joyously play together, regardless of which clan they belong to. Initially this upsets their parents greatly, but in the end it’s hard to really hate the parents of your children’s friends. The film promotes an age-appropriate and inspiring, if fanciful and naïve, notion that all the world’s problems would be solved if we all thought like children. As by spreading joy throughout the town, Jesper and Klaus inadvertently make the town a better place to live. It’s the theme of the film (not that they’re subtle about it): one act of good-will always begets another (or something like that). Still, all this doesn’t please the village elders, who abhor the change from the town’s hateful origins. They will ultimately serve as villains trying to put an end to all this gift-giving business.

Of course, there’s another villain of sorts, as well. Despite all the good he’s doing, Jesper is ultimately still motivated mostly by the notion of getting back to his old cushioned life. He is essentially using Klaus and preying on his kindness in order to launch himself back to a life of selfishness. It’s here the story feels most Dickensian, particularly in a scene where the school teacher (now love interest) acts functionally the same to the ghost of Christmas present and takes Jesper to the city center to see for himself the love and joy that he has helped bring to the world. But, still his desires to go home are strong, and, of course, he keeps them a secret. So between Jesper’s inner conflict about where he belongs in life and the external conflict of the community trying to fight back against a change in its culture, the film naturally comes to climax when the two conflicts meet and Jesper must confront both challenges at once.

What I’ve realized in writing this review … is that I am very impressed by the plot’s complexity and depth. The film weaves together at least three solid story arcs (Jesper’s coming-of-age/Scrooge-like-change-of-heart, Smeerenberg’s bubbling kindness revolution, and the woodsman’s aged hero who finds redemption and purpose after so many years alone). That all three feel fully supported and without any bloat is a testament to its absolutely solid writing, and for a kid’s film no less! Furthermore, the “origin” story genre can sometimes fall flat as it can just feel like the writers are writing more Wikipedia entries, explaining how every little aspect came to be more than just telling a good story. I call it the Han Solo trap. As for Klaus, the little tidbits about why Klaus uses reindeer and not horses, who the “elves” who work his workshop are, always clever and grow organically from the plot.

Plus, despite my opening doubts regarding whether the dark tone really fit a “Christmas” movie, the film very capably captures the joys of the Christmas season. Like Christians think about Jesus, Klaus/Jesper bring a world of light into a world of darkness. The film teaches about the importance of creating a loving community, of being selfless, and most importantly of respecting the spiritual aspect of the season. Even if this is a decidedly capitalistic/entrepreneurial movie, the film is not without a spiritual side. The previously mentioned “chance” of the woodsman seeing that initial drawing of the boy locked in the tower is no chance at all. Instead, throughout the film we see that the woodsman is “haunted” in a sense by a ghostly wind that points him in the path of righteousness. The film has its own explanation for what the force behind the wind is, but it is not too far of a stretch to point out the similarities between the wind and the Christian idea of the guiding Holy Spirit. Now, I’m not going to sit here and tell you that the woodsman represents God the Father and Jesper God the Son, (or is Klaus more the Christ figure?) because I think this movie is decidedly not Christian, but more I just want to highlight that I enjoyed that the film allowed for the presence of spirituality, which moves this film from the realm of secular kindness to one that recognizes the power and presence of some spiritual goodness, aligning with how many think of the “Christmas spirit.”

Now, let’s be clear, this is a fun, family classic, but it’s not a perfect film. In fact, I downright disliked the first twenty to thirty minutes, for the aforementioned tonal reasons, but also because I really disliked Jason Schwartzmann’s voice acting in the lead role of Jesper. My dislike lessened with the introduction of the woodsman, but it never went away fully. I can’t help but think this movie would be better with a different actor voicing Jesper. Everyone else does an adequate job with the voice work. J.K. Simmons as Klaus takes on an almost Batman-like stoic gruffness, and Rashida Jones as the teacher and love interest is just fine. And, again, I never really fell in love with the art style and it sometimes distracted me, and I found the soundtrack, particularly the main song to be rather lame and too much “of its time” than the typically timeless, more Broadway productions that Disney/Pixar put out. Still, director Sergio Pablos has done something I did not think possible. He and his team created a *new* Christmas classic, one that I’m sure will be played on an annual basis in many households across the world.

***1/4 (Three and a fourth stars out of four)

[multifandom--imagine]

(requested by anon)

➽ How did you meet

• Your meeting was particularly unusual. If it was at the wrong time it is quite questionable. • You met in a hospital, the day of the death of your grandmother, your second mother, as well as "guardian angel".

• The doctors contacted you because you were one of the closest relatives and after communicating your death, they asked you to come and give a final greeting.

• And it was that day that you met him, before entering her room, you noticed an old man who was absorbed in watching your grandmother's helpless body, caressing her head.

• You had never seen that man, so untidy you doubted he could be acquaintance of your grandmother (lady of the order and cleaning).

• But you didn't pay much attention to his presence, not even when it came out of the room, giving you the chance to enter.

• In a blink of an eye he disappeared into the corridor, leaving behind a heavy smell of tobacco and alcohol.

• You met him again at your grandmother's funeral. It was a rainy and cold day, like your mood, bitter and empty.

• You looked at the coffin that was swallowed by the earth, without noticing the presence of the old man next to you.

• It was his scruffy stink that made you wake up from your depressive state.

• "My God, does it seem like smoking time?" you said at the edge of the nervous.

• The man gave you a quick glance, settling the dusty rustic jacket and taking the consummate cigarette between his fingers he blew the heavy smoke in his face and giggling he said to you "I'm not afraid of cancer"

• This sentence sent you on a rampage.

• "Well the person who was burying under the earth has been cut short by a cancer, so if you want to keep on being a asshole, you can take your fetid jacket and go fuck yourself" you whispered through clenched teeth and threateningly approached the figure of man.

• The man smiled almost amused at your words ... ah silly human, if only you had known who you were against.

• "I remembered your grandmother, very kind and faithful, surely you didn't take a shit from that good woman" he ventured to comment on the man. • "My grandmother never told me about you, probably because people like you didn't count for shit for her"

• Ouch! Someone has just touched a sore point in Czernobog's soul.

• Without thinking too much about it, the man took a last plentiful shot at a cigarette, then took the butt and threw it on your shoes and without saying anything else left, leaving you in the cemetery all alone.

• THAT’S A BINGO! EH EH EH

• However the story does not end here.

• "The most lovable man in the world" came back a few days at the bar where you worked as a waitress.

• He had ordered several drinks and well ... he was drunk to say the least.

• He was so drunk that he almost fought with another client, threatening to smash his testicles with his hammer.

• ...... ok?

• It is pointless to say that a couple of punches and that lout, half Russian and half American, lay on the floor of your senseless bar.

• Your boss was going to leave the body on the street, but as much as you hated that piece of shit, you would never have had the courage to let him make that end so cruel, it wasn't what your grandmother had taught you.

• so you decided to drag it to your apartment. You lived practically above the bar where you worked.

• But obviously you threw it on the sofa and then you took refuge in the room, collapsing exhausted from sleep.

• The next morning you woke up and going to the kitchen you realized that your apartment smelled terribly of alcohol.

• so you opened all the windows to let the air change, making Czernobog wake with a start.

• "What the fuck..." he said through gritted teeth and then stared at you in shock for a few seconds "We didn't fuck, right?" he asked you in no uncertain terms.

• You looked at him unkempt, shaking his head.

• The expression of the man seemed disappointed for a few seconds, only to shrug, adding a sustained “Luckily".

• whatta.piece.of.cosmic.shit.

• "Anyway you are in my apartment and I do not accept that you scrunch everything, then lift your ass and go and wash, as it should" you said in a stern tone indicating the bathroom.

• With a lazy line the ancient god went to the bathroom to wash as requested.

• When he came out of the bathroom he smelled decidedly clean even though the aroma of tobacco did not give up.

• his gaze settled on your butt, because you had your shoulders busy preparing breakfast.

• He would probably have thrown you a slap on the ass if he wasn't reported for sexual harassment.

• You turned towards him sipping a cup of coffee and schairendoti the voice you said: "Anyway you should thank me, I saved your ass. If it wasn't for me, my boss would have thrown you on the roadside"

• "Thanks..." he murmured too proudly.

• "Sorry? I didn't hear you right"

• "I said thank you, fuck"

• "If you know my grandmother, you will already know my name"

• "(y/n)" he said without blinking "You have a nice shit name" he added, as he looked out the window, lighting a cigarette.

• "Then what's your name, asshole?"

•"Czernobog"

•"You have a shitty name than mine"

➽ Skinship n’ cuddles

• Old marpion

• As I said before, he would be very tempted to give you some pats on the ass, but in the early days of your relationship Czernobog prefers to stay on his own.

• Only when the situation becomes more intimate then the old god brings out the beast in him.

• Your first kiss was one of the most intense.

• You were probably entertaining with your usual pungent conversations, but then a long exchange of glances was enough to completely reverse the situation.

• Czernobog got up from the sofa and advancing quickly towards you, he took you by the hips and slammed you gently against the wall.

• in less than a second your lips attacked in a fierce languid struggle.Your tongues sought each other out, creating sensual snaps and perverse verses.

• Probably the old god would grab your face with one hand, to subdue you even more and with a predatory gesture would bite your lower lip until a small trickle of blood came out.

• needless to say, you slapped him in the face.

•despite the somewhat ferocious contacts, Czernobog also has its tender side.

•Especially when it's sad. A striking example is the death of Zorya.

•You found him on the couch, dark and with a cigarette in his hand. He did not utter a word and his eyes were empty.

•But when he felt your delicate hand tracing the outline of his hollow and wrinkled face, he couldn't help but let his face fall on your chest, letting bitter tears fall on his cheeks.

•Probably the night would end with you two embracing on the sofa, while the arms of the old god wrapped your soft and young body, so fragile and precious, while its nostrils intoxicated with the white perfume of your living skin.

• Your nights of passions are certainly the most brutal in the world. Trapped clothes, broken bed, neighbors complaining about the constant mess. In short, we understood each other.

•Surely his favorite position is the doggy style or simply squeeze yourself between his body and the wall.

• your ass will turn purple for continuous spanking

➽ Arguments

• Arguing with Czernobog is a daily and frequent thing.

• This god is practically born to discuss and be melodramatic and the war obviously accentuates all the components.

• surely your most serious and heavy quarrel was when you found out he was a god. You have almost destroyed your home as well as your relationship.

• probably, you would try to stay calm, but instead he would immediately start to fight with cruel and angry tones.

• you would probably both end up throwing the house objects at you and cursing each other.

• Even if cruel Czernobog would never dare raise his hands with you or beat you, he would never forgive him. Rather it insults you heavily, it still doesn't do you any honor.

• In the end, you would be chasing him from home in the worst cases and he wouldn't show up for days and weeks. He would probably show himself around as if nothing had happened.

• Rare times he apologizes, put your soul in peace

➽ Dates

• Let's be clear, Czernobog hates the city as much as the new gods.

• Probably on special occasions it would lead you to take some walks in the countryside or in the woods, and although you suck, he would insist on hunting animals or telling you how he killed cows.

• Often it takes you to some bar or pub, nothing fancy, after all it is Czernobog.

• He probably will never introduce you to other gods, he would be too afraid to put you in danger.

• Sometimes you spend whole afternoons at home playing chess or drafts, or watching a few films on netflix together.

➽ Some of your conversations

you: "So why did you and my grandmother know each other?"

Czern: "Well you know your grandmother has Slavic origins"

you: "And ... then?"

Czern: "I am one of the many gods who prayed, and probably after her death, I lost the only faithful fuck I had left"

you: "You what ?!"

Czern: "What the fuck are you yelling at, woman? I'm the fucking god of death so what?"

***

Czern: "Zorya is dead"

you: "I'm sorry ..."

Czern: "Do you want to know what the fucking funny thing is?"

you: "..."

Czern: "is that a fucking god of death shouldn't give a fuck about who dies or not, we will all sooner or later, woman. Yet although I am aware that if the new gods don't take you away from me, it will be my own hammer that kills you, I think I would go mad more than I am already seeing you dead, rather I'd rather kill myself "

#12

– Taiga 🐯

[trashboatprince]

Inspired by something I’ve read about Disney and Mickey being similar to one another.

So I decided to use that as an excuse to write another one-shot for dad!Henry and his ink demon son.

On with the fic!

--

During one of Linda’s first visits to the studio to see her husband, she had met a man named Sammy Lawrence.

He had a pleasant conversation with her while she waited for Henry to finish a meeting with Joey, and he had informed her of something interesting:

“All artists, whether they create through music, art, writing, or whatever their fancy is, always put a bit of themselves into their work to make it theirs and to leave their influence on it.”

Linda had never gave much thought to it in the years after that, until recently, when she had observed the little things about her husband and their new demonic cartoon son.

In recent weeks, since Bendy has become his Toon appearance, no longer the Beast or Ink Demon forms, Linda has taken noticed to certain actions and quirks of his.

The little demon always stuck out his tongue when he was focused on something, just like what Henry did. Sure, a lot of people did that, but it always happened when he was drawing something, just like the artist in the house.

He also liked to whistle absentmindedly as he did something, which Linda would catch Henry doing a lot, like when he helped with chores, or was fixing up dinner.

Bendy always falls asleep on the left side of the bed, always on his side facing the right, just like Henry. He also would mumble in his sleep, just like, you guessed it, Henry.

It’s the little things, Linda noted, and she found it charming. She’d catch them enjoying the same sorts of food, and disliking the same, though Bendy liked bacon way more than Henry did. Which is funny, considering that Henry was a fan of the tasty treat himself.

They even made similar facial expressions as well! She’d catch them smiling the same, or scowling at something in a similar way. Heck, they both had a similar laugh, though Bendy’s was a bit higher pitched.

Both are ambitious and up for doing something, neither like to laze about, they both had an itching to do something around the house. Both also had terrible curiosity streaks to them and had the same opinion towards jump scares, both hating them.

They preferred comedy and action shows and films over drama and horror, and always read the funnies in the newspapers before looking over anything else. Though Bendy, in his case, liked to just see what new movies were coming out or what activities were happening in town when reading the paper.

Linda had seen some of these traits with Bendy when he was in his Beast form and Ink Demon one as well, though they were harder to spot.

She smiled a little as she watched the two of them in Henry’s work space. Henry was sitting at his desk, trying to work on a scene, a pen in his mouth as he was lost in thought. Bendy was laying on the floor near him, in a similar state of thought as he tried to figure out what to do with the drawing he was doing.

She almost laughed when she watched them both bite down too hard on their pens, realizing their mistake when they both tasted ink. “Uhg!” Henry exclaimed and pulled the pen away, reaching for his nearby water.

“Not again!” He said after taking a drink, looking at the pen. Bendy snickered as he sucked on his own pen, might as well drain it before it gets on the carpet.

“Don’t worry, I broke mine too.”

“At least you can stand drinking that stuff.”

“If ya give it a try, you might like it!”

“Bendy, I’m an artist, I’ve tried it more times than I’d like to admit. It’s never good.”

“Tastes good to me every time.”

Linda turned away, still smiling. They were too much alike, it was amazing how they never noticed. Guess Sammy was right, an artist does put themselves into their work, even if they never realize how much they put in.

[the-yunhaneul]

OOC WEEK: DAY FOUR

When and how did you get into Harry Potter?: Honestly, HP was one of things where when the films started coming out I saw them, owned the DVDs etc. but I wasn’t hugely obsessed with it? Keep in mind I was 4 when the first film came out so my interests were very different, I was too busy watching Barbie movies and dealing with a new baby sister to be bothered by films in the same way I am now. I continued to get the films and watch them but it wasn’t until I was about 13/14 that the obsession got deep. I think that’s really the age tbh where I needed HP, I needed this idea of magic and this whole other world within our own where things seemed so much better and I needed to be a part of that, and ever since it’s been a growing love tbh. Though I’ll also admit I have a love/hate relationship with HP, for as many things it’s given me there are many things I question or find a little faulty?? If that’s the right word. Basically I feel like HP is my problematic fave of series :’)

Favourite HP movie? Why?: Without a doubt Goblet of Fire. I just love the whole thing, how much new information it gave us about the other schools, the more vivid inclusion of dragons and other magical creatures/beings. Also I love Cedric Diggory, I think he’s such an underrated character and frustratingly he’s only in that one film when he’s mentioned more in the earlier books. I also feel like poor Cedric gets hated on a lot because people think he’s a bit of a dick and forget that the books are basically in Harry’s POV and he’s jealous of Cedric so obviously the way he’s described and viewed is more negative then it needs to be. Basically Cedric deserved better and I love him in that film and the Twi-Wizard Tournament was a cool plot, I think.

Favourite HP book? Why?: I won’t lie, I feel like a sham... I haven’t read all the books, but hear me out on this, as I said earlier I didn’t get into HP until I was about 13/14 and then I started to read the books but then suddenly my GCSE exams were coming up and any reading I did ended up being reading for school and if I did read anything for leisure they were short stories or things that could help towards my GCSE exams. Then I went to college, took English Literature and as you can imagine that meant a lot more reading for school soooooo I never finished the series, I do intend to but I have like a long list of books I want to read/am reading/series I need to finish so who knows when it’ll happen. However, I will say I like the first book, I think the first book is a lovely introduction to the world of HP.

Favourite HP character? Why?: I love Neville. Adore him. Honestly, a part of me would’ve really liked Neville to have even more significance throughout the series, I feel like he played the part of a fool for so long and even though by the Deathly Hallows he’d matured and became a hero I still think he deserved more. I think there’s not a lot of appreciation for young Neville and everything he’s going through, there’s not enough recognition for the fact that he’s in a really difficult family situation and he deals with everything so well, he’s a kid who’s unpopular and not initially great at magic, living knowing his parents were tortured into a state of madness and I feel like not enough of that is appreciated? Plus tbh I think it would’ve been the best plot twist if he were actually the chosen one and Harry was just some diversion and Neville saved the day, I also would’ve liked it if Neville killed Bellatrix tbh or if he’d played more of a part in her demise because of her involvement in making his life extremely difficult.

Least favourite HP character, plot, or ship (or all three)?: My least favourite character is Peter Pettigrew because tbh I just feel like he was a twat and I feel like he was undeserving of being in Gryffindor, undeserving of the friendship he found in that house and undeserving of forgiveness. Plus it really urks me every time I hear Ron tell Harry there wasn’t a Death Eater who wasn’t Slytherin and I’m like “YOU’RE FUCKING RAT IS A GRYFFINDOR TRAITOR, RON!” because I’m very defensive of my house :’) My least favourite plot... erm... I don’t really like the whole sort of plot of Harry in pursuit of Cho Chang? I feel like maybe because she’s another character we hear barely anything of and then suddenly Harry is smitten with her and then not like a year after him and Cho are smooching (in front of Cedric’s picture and the pictures of all the relatives who are dead, which is super like weird in my opinion, like ‘oh poor Cedric, he was a good wizard, he really fancied you and now we should make out in front of his picture’ or maybe not, Harry?) but then he’s suddenly into Ginny and I feel like when his attention turns to Ginny our lovely Cho Chang gets sort of thrown to the side and she becomes unimportant again? Basically I feel like Cho Chang was used as a bit of a tool to make the Harry/Ginny thing more of a ‘surprise’ and she deserved better. My least favourite ship is... erm... I’m gonna be honest and go with Tonks and Remus. Don’t get me wrong I love Tonks, I love Remus and I love we get Teddy from them but I just never saw it? Maybe it’s again because in the films Tonks wasn’t really important for such a long time and then suddenly she shows up and oh by the way she loves Remus and suddenly she’s having a baby? And it’s like ‘woah ok what is happening?’. Plus I just think it’s really lame that JK was ‘going to have Remus be LGBT’ but then chose not to... but still made him a werewolf and used the metaphor which must not be named.

What’s your favourite HP-related memory?: You know one of my favourite HP memories is probably becoming part of the HP RPG community, I feel like I’ve learnt so much more about the series from interacting with other people but, more than that, I’ve heard so many new ideas and own headcanons that, to me, make the whole HP universe so much more interesting... Mainly ‘cause JK left a lot of gaps in information that I desperately need.

Why did you decide to start roleplaying HP-related stuff?: Honestly, I’ve only ever really been part of the HP RPG community and I got into it because a friend of mine was in a group and she told me about it but when I was scrolling the tag I found OL instead and the rest, as they say, is history.

Most interesting part of the HP world?: Erm... I think the creatures, tbh most of the reason I liked Fantastic Beasts was the creatures, I’d happily watch a film of just them in their little homes doing their thing.

Your wand: I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea hahahaha so basically when I first got Pottermore it was so great and fantastic and I loved all my info... then they re-did Pottermore and I couldn’t get my old information back because of an email issue so I made a new account and tbh was bitterly disappointed, the house quiz alone in my opinion is just shit now compared to how it used to be, I literally found out my house and then logged out and haven’t logged in since soooooo I’m not sure what my wand is any more :’)

Your patronus: Again, no idea :’)

Your boggart (if you’re okay sharing!): I’m not really sure what my boggart would be, I’m sort of scared of lots of things tbh, I’m a bit of a wimp so Merlin knows what could come out to greet me, could be just about anything and it’d be too much.

What classes would you be best at in Hogwarts?: Probably potions and arithmancy because I have a lot of patience, like to be precise with things and like working with numbers. Though also possibly divination because I’m learning the Tarots.

What classes would you be the worst at?: Probably History of Magic ‘cause at school I struggled with History XD I loved it, I was just not great at remembering dates and stuff like that.

Your favourite thing to do if you were at Hogwarts: The library. Guaranteed.

Favourite supernatural creature from the HP world?: I actually think dementors are like super cool and an awesome idea... though it’s gotta be a niffler, hasn’t it?

Death Eaters or the Order?: I like to think I’d be part of the poor Slytherin group who when shit went down got blamed for everything when they didn’t do anything like ‘send all of Slytherin back to the dungeons’ and I’m stood there like ‘all I’ve one is read all these years’. Tbh I like both groups though, like although the DEs are obviously insane nutters I think some of them are super interesting and a lot of them are products of their families and how they were treated by other people, like is it really a surprise Draco becomes a ‘DE’ when you think of who his family is and how everyone in Hogwarts hated on Slytherin anyway??

Marauders era or Next Gen?: Marauders.

Would you join the quidditch team or cheer from the sidelines?: Ngl I don’t really like sports so I’d probably be in the library, chilling with a book like “siighhh these athletic types”.

If the Triwizard Tournament were allowed, would you put your name in?: Not a fucking chance.

Dorm life: good or bad?: Erm... I dunno, I feel like tbh I’d be a pain to live with or find other people a pain to live with because I’m very organised and neat and space lacking that would drive me crazy.

From canon HP, who would be your favourite teacher?: Flitwick, without a doubt.

If you could make J.K Rowling write another series (and write it well), would you? And if so, what would you have it focus on?: I’d have it focus on minor characters and what they were doing while Harry was getting into shit, like I’m all for big plots and death but think how much just daily random stuff must happen in a magic school? Like give me a series on the rest of the Gryffindor dorm and what they were doing during the year. Give me a book series about Luna, Cho Chang, Oliver Wood etc.