#i hate keeping ppl waiting
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maybe if i get asks/requests i'll be more motivated. idk. uh. TELL ME WHO TO DRAW FROM UNDERTALE YELLOW
#undertale yellow#i havent drawn anyone yet. which is unacceptable. my blorbos. i must draw them#i need a warmup in order to get back to fr comms#i hate keeping ppl waiting
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digging through files to find some stuff to post for the trick or treating made me realize I have. A LOT. Of old/forgotten-about projects, doodles, and comic concepts that I just never finished or totally pretty much finished and just never posted LOL
So over the next few weeks or so I’m gonna try to go through some of it and see what I can’t post :D
#YIPPEE! i have some bigger background projects too that like. I keep working on/have parts I can post but I’m like…#‘Wasnt I waiting on something specific to reveal/doodle before I post this??’ And then the mental block begins#So anyway I’m getting a bit more organized#The etho playlist and Don’t Let It Reach the Heart are hanging over me though and it’s hard to get in a good headspace to work on them…#I’m being brave though and chipping away at them bit by bit!#I also wanna wait to drop something big until I’ve been active for a bit so it doesn’t come out of nowhere and gets no traction or w/e hehe#Numbers aren’t Important to me but the people who enjoy the story are :> so I’d hate to post something at a bad time and lots of ppl miss i#Anyway!!! Just a little update :]
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There's something about like. A certain genre of posts / Online Opinions about insecurity/depression/misery/complaints that are so unhelpful that they wrap right around to being straight up hilarious. and it's the ones that are more or less written to the tone of "Feeling bad? That's gross!" Like, just so you know, don't voice your insecurities/ have low self esteem, because that's offputting! You're gross and weird. Don't be insecure about that, though. That would be stupid if you felt insecure about people disliking you for being insecure. Not attractive. You should be thinking about being as attractive as possible. You shouldn't make comments about suicide, even if you're suicidal! Keep those thoughts entirely to yourself. Make sure nobody around you knows you're thinking about this. It would Make Them Uncomfortable. It's better to keep these thoughts in your head where they can fester. Don't post OR talk to friends with complaints about you feeling miserable or depressed. Tbh people who are sad/upset a lot? Kinda a red flag! You are probably miserable because you're a bad person and you've brought this on yourself. If you don't have friends, it's because you're awful to be around. Easy! Solved the problem for you. And no, there is no nuance to this, got it? So, make sure to feel bad about feeling bad, but don't feel bad about it, because, well, that's just gross. And annoying! You might've wanted your brain rotted thoughts to be Peer Reviewed, you might have just needed to vent- you might've been hoping for some comfort, to get things off your chest. Well, don't! Don't talk about thoughts or feelings that are negative with your friends, you'd be burdening them and that's only meant for THERAPY. #SponsoredbyBetterHelp #MentalHealth like, DAMN. that's so helpful. you're so good at helping. I um really liked the part where these are all hard and fast rules that encourage keeping feelings bottled up and keeping your friends at arm's length. That's really funny of you.
#I FEEL LIKE COMPLAINING RN in the context of this alternate universe these posts live in. that makes me evil rn. I may not even keep#the post up. but I Needed to complain about these bc I hate seeing them#really funny and good because it very much feeds into that part of the brain where you go wait am I stupid? am I horrible? am I annoying?#before you express any kind of personal feelings. from feeling insecure alll the way down the spectrum to feeling like your life is over#before anyone How Dare You Say We Piss On The Poor-s at me YES there is a nuanced version of this#which is. you can make someone feel like shit (A Fellow Sufferer Of The Mental Eelnesses) by using them as your dumping ground#in excess and usually with no regard for how they feel and without Regular conversations inbetween#and in a one-sided way where they can't do the same and complain with you as a sounding board in return#don't tell new friends you hardly know abt THE MOST personal shit you can possibly think of. there are steps being skipped here#right? we know this. we all know it. setting a boundary is a thing. overwhelming a person is a thing#on the other hand there is such a thing as a friend who IS okay to listen and wants to help. and friends who relate.#maybe talking abt personal stuff makes ppl feel closer sometimes. just a thought! maybe not everything is Emotional Labor. maybe just maybe#but like come on. these are almost intentionally unhelpful posts#long post
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The way fans on the st sub are almost all in agreement Nancy ending up with neither Jon nor Steve wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, and how they can even come up with a sleuth of reasons as to why, honestly pretty valid and fair reasons, but then are absolutely gobsmacked when fans merely speculate something along those lines for El is, quite something.
#el hopper#byler#platonic elmike#stranger things#this is coming from someone who ADORED mileven in s1-2#I literally skipped all of s2 in my rewatch before s3 aired bc I just wanted to see their reunion#then s3 happened#and I was confused at#A LOT of ppl are#and anyone coming to voice that confusion is ran off Reddit like they’re committing a crime#like would it hurt y’all to have some of the same common sense you have for el like you do with Nancy#??#I am more jancy leaning but also I just feel like it’s certain stancy ain’t happening#but I’m also not totally against Nancy wanting to be on her own for a while#maybe they’d imply jancy Will find their way back to each other#maybe they’re teamed up in s5 and wait until the very end to cement that certainty for each other#but I would not hate their stories if Nancy and Jon decided to live their own lives#FOR THEMSELVES#Nancy doing what she wants and loves#Jonathan doing what he wants instead of just doing stuff that helps people around him#and I’m not going to even get into the reasons why el and mike would benefit from living for themselves outside of their relationship#the attachment to the ship is stronger than any sort of attachment to the character#and when the things keeping them together are not strong to begin with…#that attachment is doomed and hard to watch and enjoy like idgi at all#also; all the pro-ronance comments on there getting like 30+ likes??#go ronance I guess??!??#idk if it’s because they think byler actually has a serious possibility while ronance has less build up#so they can sort of play with that idea without actually having to take it seriously…#at least ronance has a positive audience on there#a win is a win I guess 😭🫡
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they banned ap psych in florida cuz the class ap discusses sexuailty and gender which violates ron desantis' piece of shit dont say gay law so fuck you ron for that
in the college board statement they say it was banned because "teaching foundational content on sexual orientation and gender identity is illegal under state law" which is bullshit because these gov leaders believe anything lgbtq is a brain disease so you'd think theyd keep the brain learning class
they banned ap african american studies because "it lacks educational value and historical accuracy" which is making it easier for them to erase black history that is so intertwined with the history of this country that most everything here is so deeply antiblack
this mf has his head so far up his ass that hes ruining our education system even more than it already was
#fuck you ron desantis i hate you so much I hate you i hate you i hate yoy#and cuz me nd my friends are tryna reach our counselors to see whats up or if theyre rearranging schedules and keep mentioning him#i keep getting ron desantis ads ab if i want to elect him president of the united fucking states of America#and then it was an ap class i was interested in taking cuz i thought itd be cool to learn about so fuck you ron for that too#and THEN it was the only class i knew ppl in. ljke half the class was ppl ive seen before or talked too#im ranting ab missing out on the class nd not seeing my friends but its really a bigger issue than that#like its scary hes using his power to attack lgbtq communities and kids and then he has enough support that hes rallying for head seat#its not safe here at all i cannot fucking wait to leave#ron desantis#us politics#ap psychology#college board#lgbtq#so mad im shaking im so sorry if this doesnt make any sense but school starts in a week exactly nd im tryna figure out the little issue#l speaks#keep talking l#ranting in the tags because i can#black history#racism
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wow I didn’t think reblogging that tea post and then seeing people’s tags would deal me such strong psychic damage. come over I can fix you I can find a tea you will like. “I don’t like tea” how can you say that as a blanket statement when there are so many vastly different kinds of tea. head in hands
#‘it’s like coffee but not good’#while a cup of black tea does have a great deal less caffeine in it than coffee#it also has a stimulant called l-theanine which is NOT found in coffee#and the more complex combination of the two stimulants hit your system much more slowly#which is why tea doesn’t give you jitters like coffee does#anyone who’s like wow I need my coffee to survive but I hate that it makes me nauseous and gives me heart palpitations and bad breath#to you I say. wean yourself off coffee and onto tea!!!!!!!#but WAIT I can keep going. nauseous? ginger tea. sore throat? peppermint contains menthol which works as a numbing agent#green and black teas are both very high in antioxidants#chamomile and lavender do both have a calming affect#BUT WHAT ABOUT THE TASTE I hear you say#IT TASTES LIKE GRASS. try a floral tea or a black tea or chai or Thai tea#ITS SO BITTER you’re either steeping it for too long or the water you’re using is too hot#not to sound like I’m fucking uncle iroh or something I just apparnerlt have strong thoughts and feelings about tea#I can’t handle ppl going ugh I hate tea and it’s like. overbrewed lipton in microwaved tap water.#anyway MY favorites are jasmine and lavender earl grey#and currently I’m really into this corn silk tea my brother bought me at h mart#it’s like gen mai cha but even more#congrats for making it this far into my tea rant tags. if you comment your tastes I can give you a personalized tea recommendation
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my fellow anxiety havers what is one of your mundane day-to-day tasks that should by no means be anything remarkable but feels like you are being hunted for sport. i’ll go first: putting all of your groceries on the conveyor belt during checkout is like a long series of quick time events to me
#marzi speaks#it’s bc like. you have a cart Full of groceries#there is a cashier looking to scan the groceries#there is (often) a bagger looking to bag the groceries and put them back in your cart#goal: get as many groceries onto that belt as fast as possible#REMEMBER: heaviest items go first so that nothing gets crushed when the bagger puts the groceries back in your cart#it is so stressful. move so fast ‘which of these items is gonna be heavier’ getting to the end and realizing you missed like 3 cans…#it’s even worse if there are ppl behind you. i live in texas so i can at least make socially acceptable conversation with the cashier#EXCEPT i’m already way overthinking the conveyor belt situation. i’m already frazzled#and now i gotta do small talk? oh god#on the bright side i am so fast at it it’s insane. i move faster than the cashier can keep up with#which is A Good Thing. bc that means i am at max efficiency#but like. WAAAUUGHH#and then u pay and hope the card reader isn’t gonna be a bitch#and you sit there for a moment while the cashier and bagger bag the rest of your groceries#and ur like ‘….should i help should i stay here’#tbh checkout is why i like never go grocery shopping alone if i know i won’t have self check out#bc what if there is no bagger. then i gotta balance Get Groceries On Belt. Pay For Groceries. AND Bag The Groceries#ouh god the time concerns. no . never. you can’t make me do that alone#someone handles the transaction while the other person bags it’s the only reasonable way to do it#i KNOW logically that it is not a big deal. but i hate the idea of making anyone wait for me
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(wake up to thunder noise at 5am, thinking) (It's Shinomiyas+Narumi thought)
Isao becoming the monster to ensure the later generation's survival is how Kikoru lose her daddy and how Narumi finds his father figure
#Idk man#For Narumi he's the father he needs#the one who will truely evaluate him from the result#He had enough of seeing ppl who produce less result keeps getting more praise just because they showed more 'efforts'#While Kikoru just...want to be praised for an effort she put in#praise that she will never receive until the result is shown#Although both know that when Isao finally praise them--#It's truely because they showed the result#and not just some shallow compliment#Still a tragedy for Kikoru as bc Isao used to be much kinder#Narumi wants to wow him while Kikoru want to make him smile#Neither get their wish granted#Not even in their imaginations#fal's random thoughts#what the heck fal why aren't you sleeping#Idk blame matsumoto for that#kaiju no.8#Shinomiya Isao#Shinomiya Kikoru#Narumi Gen#faltalkskn8#I'm sure I keep things vague enough but...#kn8 manga spoilers#just in case#(although Narumi will probably thinks Isao hates him had Hasegawa not become an unintentional mommy figure doing a talk)#Wait is that means Kafka is an accidental mother figure for Kikoru?#Kafka could've been to Kikoru exactly what Hasegawa is to Narumi#bridging a gap and make their relationship more...brighter?#Thanks to no.9 we never find out#Burn in hell Eryngi
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i see your jason/helena/roy idea, and raise you a roy/dick and jason/helena becoming a weird polycule. the two couples keep crossing paths and it somehow turns into a roy/dick/jason/helena relationship.
ooooh YES. especially with the canon history of HelenaDick thown in-
bc then there's the joke/angle ppl always take with JayRoy of "oh Jason keeps stealing Dick's friends/exes", except this time, it's Helena who's Dick's ex that Jason just happened to steal. even funnier if he didn't mean to steal her and the first time they slept together was early on in Jason's Red Hood days and Helena really had no idea that this new guy on the scene had any sort of connection to Bruce or Diick. i think Helena and Jason are a fun couple for "this started as hatefucking but now i go to you if i need to be stitched up and if someone hits on you i'm burning down a building idk what label exists for that, do you" sort of vibe. where they won't say they're dating, even deny they're dating pretty vehemently if they're asked- but also wholly devoted in a "matching each other's freak" sort of way.
meanwhile Dick and Roy have settled into "domestic husbands without a ring" territory. they had their ups and downs in their youth and probably dated as teens, broke up for a few years bc their life paths took them in different directions, but came back together through Dick trying to help with Lian and it naturally worked out into a relationship. they still have their issues but they're sort of seen as the old married couple of the Titans that everyone knew was going to get together sooner or later bc they were the only ppl who could match each other's toxic. bc even at their best, these two are still a hot mess who can't process their emotions individually, let alone together. they argue a lot and will get in each other's face, but they always make up. usually with sex.
and i love the idea they just can't crossing paths. it's bad enough Dick has to see his ex, but his ex with Jason? that's even worse. bc there are all sorts of unresolved feelings around Jason. and it doesn't help that Roy passingly blurts out that yeah, he slept with Helena once while they were on a break. so they try to avoid running into each other on all sides, which makes inevitable team-ups even more awkward. i think it's fun if Helena breaks the tension with a crass joke just so everyone can move on. but one thing leads to another and. i think it's funny if they all swear it's a one-night stand. maybe it's not the first time swinging for one or either couple, so this is a little weird, but they swear to never speak of it again and move on.
i think them being unable to stop seeing each other. Roy is in Gotham to see Dick anyway, but now he's definitely around to see Jason and Helena, to "check up on them". and Dick wants to be angry, but he's doing the same thing. these losers cannot stop running into each other. and they can't stop matching each other's freak. Jason and Helena leave dead bodies at Roy and Dick's doorstep like courting presents, entirely uncoordinated. Dick just wants to be asked out like a normal person, Roy is sort of amused by the whole thing. i love the idea of Jason and Helena convinced they're never going to get anything outside of sex from Dick and Roy so they're sort of trying to outdo each other at some point once they find out about each other's antics, just as a running inside joke. neither of them expect it to actually work until Roy mentions that he made a reservation for four, for his next date with Dick and doesn't say another word bc the invitation is obvious.
i do think they could work well as a real polycule too. all of these characters have some kind of history and are drawn into each other's weird interpersonal lives. and they'd all be wildly possessive over each other, which makes for very fun sex. anyway you're enlightened for this pairing and i am going to be thinking about them nonstop now, ty <3
#necrotic answerings#jayhelena#roydick#heljayroydick#they work so well#jaylena is a ship that matches each other freak. they keep trying to up the ante to see how far they can take it.#and are delighted to see the others latest chaos.#like these two would hate each other. but also weirdly want to know more.#i think there's a lot of potential there#i just rarely see it explored by ppl who care about helena#but i saw you talk about an idea with jaylena that sounded SO good so i can't wait to see it.#let helena be weird about men she's into.#this is all just so fun.
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I've never seen anything written by Mindy Kaling or any show she's acted in, so when I heard the new Velma shos was going to feature Velma as a South Asian, I was excited. That was until all of the terrible things in the show and now learned of how Mindy Kaling only ever writes South Asian women as loser characters with all the same insecurities being brought up again and again, as well as her weird obsession with white men. Enough Mindy, enough with your self inserts, enough with writing the loser brown girl with the "hairy gorilla arms" that only ever takes me back to my own insecurities, enough with passing off your terrible representation as good representation just because it's representation.
#wow I just can't wait till people see how velma's written in that show and think it's okay to keep these ideas and stereotypes#fun fact: I'm extremely insecure about my own body hair. I don't wear shorts because it's against my religion but I still shave my legs#I hated knowing that when ppl in school would make fun of girls with hairy legs I would be included in that category#for a south asian woman to constantly make shows where the brown character's born-with traits are always the butt of the joke#always brought up#is so demoralizing#I thought we moved past this#it's so clear how Mindy Kaling plays for the white audience#because we south asians are tired#we're tired of it and we're tired of her#anyways that's my little rant lol#velma#velma hbo max#mindy kaling
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this is like the third time ive said this,,, and im ognna be honest,, but i'm starting to think yet again that we aren't so back
the fact he just sits on this character makes me want to cry (/hj). being a fan of media that the creator doesnt see the vision and just. sits on a character without doing anything with them. is so painful
its even worse than a corporate greed thing. its just some person telling a story. no budget cuts or cancelling. its just,,, lack of inspiration. And lack of positive reinforcement I guess ??? Lack of creativity ?? that sounds negative,,,
Every time he talks about it on stream I want to explode. It's tiring for him and a hassle to think about.
I genuinely feel like the only Link Winters fan at this point and I know that is SO incorrect LMFAO but goddamn dude I have yet to find someone who was a frequent Link POV watcher and actively engaged with the fanbase around him AND CONTINUES TO.
(uh if anyone feels like that describes themselves,,,,, dm me,,,,)
might be biased but i genuinely cannot understand how someone can be uninspired by his character or feel as if theres no arcs or plot points available for him. If he was uninspiring THEN I WOULDNT HAVE A BLOG DEDICATED TO HIM. im killing you with hammers there are wild animals outside your house
#i hate it here#:(#nopixel enjoyers.... :((( ily but i cant keep up with the times if my blorbo doesnt log on :'''''(((((#link winters brainworms#bou snorts#yknow what maybe i DO hope he finds this blog to see how much shit i talk about him#'but theres so many new ppl and things and nobody rememb-' MAKE NEW STORIES FUCKING DUMBASS. THATS HOW LIFE WORKS#YOU MOVE ON. YOU MEET NEW PEOPLE. YOU MAKE NEW STORIES. 'but that's hard-' SHUT THE FUCK UP#GET UP. MAKE NEW FRIENDS. DO IT. NO ONES GOING TO WAIT AROUND FOR YOU.#ITS HARD BUT ITS HOW LIFE WORKS FUCKASS.#i get being antisocial but thats the whole point of wonderful cringe ass gta roleplay. make a character. play a character. meet new people.#im so tired#as you can see this comes from experience.#i learned this shit and im still learning#THIS SHIT COMES FOR FREE WITH YOUR 'HAVING TO LIVE LIFE AND LEARN AT THE SAME TIME'#GET OUT THERE ALREADY FUCKASS.
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everyone shut the fuck up transmasc giyuu au
#the only ppl who know are the ubuyashikis urokodaki shinobu mitsuri and kyojuro#maybe tanjiro. eventually#i wanna say sabito too but hes dead asf does he really count?#hoo boy#i am LIVING for the ANGST in this au#yall see the vision????#he gets a skirt like the first 3 times he tears his uniform and its fine. its totally fine. why wouldnt it be (it is not at all fine)#but urokodaki burns it for him so he gets pants#and later he gets like pretty damn hurt and he meets kanae and shino and they know cause they treated him#shino calls him “she” once and he gets clearly uncomfortable so she immediately corrects herself#she tells kanae and shes like “ok ill keep that in mind!”#TIMESKIP TO WHEN MITSURI IS A PILLAR cause she became one after kyo#in an effort to distance himself from them both he tells them at one point thinking theyd hate him for it#kyojuro is like cool but whats the important thing tou wanted to tell me?#mitsu is like oh no way!! thats cool with me!!#OH WAIT T4T RENGIYU?!?!#IDEASSS#what if kyo is like “cool same! anyways” and giyuu is like ?????#so. yeah#my atla moots most likely have no idea what im talkin bout at all lmaoooo#kny#giyuu tomioka#trans giyuu#sukiluvvs
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God. God. God. Holy fucking shit i love Avatar so fucking much
#horse.txt#im being so real right now it breaks my goddamn heart that so many people hate it on principle and go into it waiting to be disappointed#like. god. seriously? how do so few people seem to see the shit im seeing? how do people not GET its RIGHT THERE???#idk man im like. high and the hd release is out so it feels like Christmas but this shit has been on my mind and its at like a precipice#its one thing when ppl just aren't into it but the absolute LOATHING and DISDAIN people harbour for these movies is just. baffling#i cant understand it#i hate statistics. why did it have to pan out this way#how can anybody hate this production literally decades in the making? the fucking DEFINITION of a Passion Project?#the labour and love and inventive GENIUS that has gone into these films--and#you know what? the writing ISN'T that fucking awful. its not perfect because no movie is ever fucking perfect and sometimes you#have to give a script and characters breathing room. room to make mistakes!!! because this fucking obsession with#'characters dont have to be realistic!' is BULLSHIT. and NO saying that does not conflict with the idea that Characters=/=real ppl in#discourse!the ideas can fucking coexist! having realistic characters is GOOD its fucking GOOD when theyre stupid and do shit you dont like!#because thats what REAL PEOPLE DO thats what makes them fucking COMPELLING thats what youre SUPPOSED to let draw you in!!!!!!#but noooo no no no no keep repeating your smurf pocahontas jokes and roll your eyes at anyone who does like it like theyre stupid#because you can't be assed to give something a chance just because everyone Else is calling it stupid#and you dont want them to roll their eyes at /you/#i know this is dumb to be so heated about but im just. im sad man. im happy im having a great day!! but im sad#about how few people i can share it with yk..???
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Do ppl genuinely think jinx blew up the council for the liberation of zaun
#actually I need to rewatch bc from what I remember#jinx’s ideals are making silco happy like I don’t see her actually upset about what ppl are going through or wanting real change or whatever#like i think she’ll def be some sort of hope to some ppl of zaun due to the action#but like. that was pure malice that wasn’t Justice for zaun#she killed powder for killing her family the first time and she killed the council for killing silco#Bc jinx couldn’t have done it since she’s perfect silco said so#and this isn’t a violence isn’t the answer thing NO#i think ekko should blow up the council too and I hate that he’s hanging with that rat#heimerdinger and cailtyn are the same to me they’re both annoying#stay away from zaunites ty#you’ve done ENOUGH#the audacity to argue with ekko about who enforcers are#‘the Ppl dont want my help :(‘ ok kys. ez#Uhm anyways that’s very subjective and again I’m biased against piltover they’re literally nothing new to me#point is I don’t think jinx is the revolutionary some of y’all tout her to be#i know it’s scary but if u want that ur gonna have to focus on a black character outside his white potential LI#I KNOW I KNOW! it’s new to you it’s hard you can’t see him as anything besides smth ur fave reacts to#but if u want the person protecting zaunites as best as they can bc they love zaun itself#Ur gonna have to look past the sad white girl#difference between jinx and ekko is oppression shaping a rebellious personality vs the choice to rebel and do better for your people#not in a theory vs praxis way but in who’s actually concerned with others welfare and how zaun will move forward#while ekko is willing to use violence for his cause he’s more worried about keeping his own ppl safe which could potentially set him down#the road vander went - as opposed to vi who was like. traumatized into working with pilties this soon#It’d be a slow road for him. but also take into account he saw vander go down that path before and if it’s one thing he’s good at it’s#learning from the past. bring in how the silco and vander won’t repeat itself bc jinx who’s angrier at piltover and life in general than she#is hopeful for zaun might have to be forced to gain that compassion once interpersonally interacting with zaunites some who may genuinely#look up to her as a leader as opposed to local drug lords lapdog is gonna have to buck up and take responsibility#obvi vi and powder are vander silco foils duh but the way I’m thinking ekko and jinx could potentially be#wait for it#what couldve been
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got so fucking annoyed with the stoplight near my house taking 10 fucking minutes to turn green at night that i emailed the city abt it. my 2am activism 😤
#i’m the laziest goddamn asshole on earth but turns out if you piss me off consistently when i am trying to get home at 2am#then i will write a whole ass email to the city abt it to complain#i doubt they’ll do anything abt it but it would be nice if they did#i keep seeing ppl run the light bc they don’t wanna wait for it to turn (which i Understand Completely)#but it’s already a dangerous intersection as it is i would hate for the stupid light to cause more needless accidents#sighs.#wade talks#personal
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I would like. To be in mutual love
#rant#yeah...#...........................................................................................................................................#look its like this. im chronically ill. i know its not totally up to me i cant go out 1-3 times a week trying ro meet ppl. i know i#cant even eat some days my tummy too upset. cant work some days cant even sit up. can barely keep up witj friends i already have#and i know the being drained wont get better. i might be this sick forever. and i know im prioritizing my own art over#meetjng strangers. thats a choice. i know its my own fault im lonely. i also just. i wanna build a relationship#that long term where u meet and become friends then best friends then fall in love and hey if ur lucky marry ur best friend#and i know that wont come from forcing myself on dates w ppl i dont like. i know no ones ever liked me before#i know i havent felt attraction in years anyway. i miss having a crush. but i suppose itd be sad anyway. to crush and not be liked back#to feel ill need to wait another 5 years for another rare crush. i dont believe in fate i dont think. so i might not ever#kiss someoje i like. i might not get lucky and hold a crushs hand. spend months or years with someone like that#i just. i hate so much romance isnt like skills. i cant just date 1x a week until i run into love#i cant even find 1 person a month to crush on let alone ask out. cause the feelings are luck too#luck of who u run into even if u go tl events. even wuen i had 10k tinder matches the only date#the only person who respjded. was someone with a gf who didnt have much in common with me and me not mucj w them and it#was just not enough click to even make a friend#god it makes me sad. id like to kiss someone special. hold their hand. hear em talk hours#i have friends and love em but i dont wanna kiss a friend. i just dont feel romancy very much.
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