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sugasgrowl · 5 years ago

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The Positive [Prologue]

Hello all! I am finally back from the dead after literally writing this on a whim. My other wips are sobbing in Google docs rn. But alas, I’m starting my period and am emotional and soft for dad!bts. This is by no means a super original concept whatsoever, but I just *clenches fist* needed to write it. This is the beginning of a drabble series that I assume will show the OC and Tae go from estranged friends/a one night stand to parents. Basically, I just wanted an excuse to write Tae with kids. I have no idea how long this will end up being LMFAO.

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: ?? Friends to lovers? Manwhore to upstanding father? Sorta smutty eventually? There will be angst

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, mentions of sex, Taehyung is a fuckboy but at least he owns it, Get it Sandra, mentions of hangovers

Word Count: 1513

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Your brain felt like mush. Like when you were a kid and twisted your swing up just to lift your feet off the ground and spin around and around and around and the world was tilting and swaying before your eyes. The sweltering heat of the soft bed you lay on made your mouth feel just as sweaty as underneath your tits.

In your barely-alive state, flashes of the night before flickered in your mind. A beautiful face catching in the glare of neon lights. Thumping bass rattling your lungs as you pressed your body against his. Deep kisses that took your breath away, tongues that slid against each other. A warm, eager mouth desperate to explore every inch of you. Burning, honey skin whose heat relaxed you more than the alcohol. And then...pleasure. Mind blowing, blinding white lights bursting behind your eyelids. A fullness you’d never felt before.

You really regretted drinking tequila last night.

Squirming out from under the heavy down comforter, cool air hit your face. The room around you was dreary gray from the pouring rain--piles of dirty clothes towering in the desk chair and on top of the dresser at the other side of the room barely visible in the overcast veil. Through the blurry grog of sleep, you, unfortunately, could make out the sight of multiple beer and Mountain Dew bottles, as well as an old greasy pizza box. A gaming chair and monitor. Anime posters adorned the walls. You already regretted the decision to choose dick over standards, but it’d just been so long.

The warm body beside you shifted with a throaty groan. You froze, praying to sweet angel baby Jesus that he wasn’t awake.

Taehyung. An old friend from college who never quite...left. Mentally, anyway. The two of you graduated years prior. Both of you felt the tickle of The Big Three-Oh breathing down your necks. Most of your friend group had moved on to have at least semi-decent Grown Up jobs, but somehow Tae was stuck in the same mindset he had when you were powering through classes with weak and tired prayers for graduating.

And somehow, four years later, you thought it would be a good idea to fuck him.

You took a deep breath and slowly, carefully eased out of bed to pull on your clothes. The movement made your lower half ache with memories of the night before. Despite throwing back shots like your life depended on it, you could still remember pretty much everything from the previous night. And what you remembered was...fantastic, to put it frankly. Not that you were surprised. Taehyung was a good lay, based on what you heard from most of the girls in your dorm back in the day.

Tugging your jeans up your legs, you decided that sleeping with your fuckboy friend was not the lowest or most shameful thing that had happened to you. You had been forced to move back home just a few months before, after you quite literally caught your ex in bed with another woman and left his ass in the dream city you’d both run off to to possibly start a life together. This was just a step to climb up from rock bottom.

“You’re not sneaking off, are you?” Taehyung’s deep voice made you jump.

Half closed, chocolate eyes pinned you to the spot. You wished he didn’t look so damn good. If he was less attractive, you’d be less likely to let this happen again in the future.

You sent him a small smile. “I...yeah, I gotta run. I’ve got a lot of work to do before Monday.”

He sat up on his elbow and ran a hand through his tousled, inky black locks. “You don’t have to leave yet, Y/N. You know that, right? We’re friends, we can get breakfast and catch up or something.”

You almost turned him down when you realized the nearest bus station going to the club where the two of you met, where you left your car, was a solid sixteen blocks away. It was raining out, and you had no umbrella. Not to mention, your monster of a debilitating hangover craved food.

Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, you nodded and sent him a polite smile. “That would be nice, actually. Thanks.”

He drove you to a diner down the street where the food smelled like old grease and thin wallets, and on top of that, there was the lingering aroma of cigarettes despite the no smoking signs plastered and faded all over the smudged glass door. The waitress, Sandra, looked to be about forty. Maybe forty-five. Hell, maybe even fifty. Her pencil thin Pamela Anderson eyebrows and premature aging said that her glory days died in the early 2000s.

When she came over to take your order, her voice croaked with decades of smoking. Her exhausted expression lightened when she spoke to Taehyung. “G’morning, sweetie. You look handsome as ever this morning.”

His boxy grin lit up the sagging establishment. “Not as beautiful as you, Sandra. Busy shift?”

“Eh. It was busier around four.” She gave you a quick glance and winked at Taehyung. “Your usual Morning After order?”

He flushed to his hairline and avoided your eyes. “I….um….yeah, thanks.”

Her dark eyes fell on you. “And for you?”

“I’ll take a Morning After order as well.”

As she walked away, you slowly turned to raise your eyebrows at the beet red man across the table from you.

“Listen…”

“Still getting around then, eh?” you teased. You propped your chin in your hand. “You haven’t changed a bit.”

He gave you the finger as Sandra placed cocoas in front of you both. You bit back a snort. He never could drink coffee, even when he was half dead after pulling all nighters--which was rare.

“I’m living my best life. I don’t need your criticism and stank attitude,” he grumbled before taking a sip from the steaming mug. “I’m balls deep in good pussy. You’re just jealous.”

“Of all your pussies?”

“I haven’t seen you in two and a half years, I don’t know your preferences.” His gaze was warm and lingered as you blew the steam from your mug. “What have you been up to? I never expected to see you around here again. I thought you were some hotshot ballbusting editor off in picture perfect Fairyland or something. What happened to Mark?”

Your expression soured. His name made the cocoa taste spoiled. Lowering the drink to the sticky tabletop, you shrugged. “I’m still a hotshot ballbuster. Just…a single one.”

“Yeah, single enough to fuck me,” he sent a pointed look. “What’d he do to send you my way? I never expected you to ask to meet up like this.”

It seemed there was no escaping the questions. You took a deep breath. “Caught him in bed with someone else.”

He crinkled his nose and shook his head in disappointment. “How cliche. What an ass.”

He took offense to the quirk of your brow. “I may be a manwhore, but I’d never cheat. I just don’t commit at all.”

“How considerate of you.”

The food was surprisingly good, considering how questionable the diner looked. Maybe it was just your hangover talking, but you couldn’t complain. Especially when Taehyung offered to pay.

You started to protest, but Taehyung waved you off and placed a twenty on the table with a devilish smile. “Don’t worry about it. In honor of your sorrows.”

He paused.

“Plus, I get discounts.”

“Do I want to know how you managed that?”

His smile widened. “Sandra and I have a special bond.”

You blanched, lowering your voice to a hiss. “My god, you’re disgusting. Do you even have standards?!”

“Hey! Sandra is a lovely lady!” he hissed back, sliding out of the booth. He looked over his shoulder with waggling eyebrows. “Besides, you called me last night. I could ask you the same question.”

You hated that he was right, and you hated yourself for calling him up. As charming and undeniably sexy as he was, you suddenly had the urge to fly to the nearest doctor’s office and get tested for every STI known to man. You thought back to your abandoned tinder profile and imagined the upstanding manwhore you could’ve found that at least had a baseline standard for the hoes he pulled.

When Taehyung drove you back to the club to get your car, an awkward silence fell over the two of you. His run down death trap of a Buick Lesabre slowed to a halt, brakes squeaking mildly.

He cleared his throat. “Well. This was fun.”

You let out a tense half chuckle. “For sure.”

As you opened your door to leave, he called out to you.

“Feel free to call me again sometime. We don’t have to wait two and a half years to see each other again.”

You nodded and plastered a smile on your face. But deep down, you vowed never to call him again. At least, not for this. And not for a long, long time. All you wanted was a nap and to put this moment of weakness behind you.

#bts fanfic #taehyung fic #dad!taehyung #bts smut #taehyung smut #bts angst

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ghostjelliess · 5 years ago

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Week One Completed

The first week of the year wasn’t entirely a full week, but it is what it is, project one: comic artist styles

Luke Pearson style - Hilda (Netflix version)

Skottie Young style - I Hate Fairyland

Noelle Stevenson style - Nimona

Charles Shultz style - Charlie Brown

“Cal-Arts”/ Thin-Line Animation style - I did not realize there was a debate here, wow, I found a rabbit hole to dive down and a lot of artists/illustrators do not take into account story/character arch/etc. that goes into an animated series, I found the criticism lazy and nit-picking without looking at the whole picture of art or the entire conversation of creating, teamwork, development, and entertainment.

#52 art projects #arting #art progress #create #my work #noelle stevenson #comic style #comics #skottie young #i hate fairyland #nimona #hilda #luke pearson #cal arts style #calarts #thin line animation #charles shultz #charlie brown

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thebananatroll · 5 years ago

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Chapter 2, part 3

三兄如严父 Sān xiōng rú yán fù Three Older brother that’s like a strict father

[???] 阿符-- Ā fú-- Ah Fu--

[???] 抱歉, 请问你们有没有见过阿符...一位帽檐倾斜角度约15°的年轻警官? Bàoqiàn, qǐngwèn nǐmen yǒu méiyǒu jiànguò ā fú... Yī wèi màoyán qīngxié jiǎodù yuē 15°de niánqīng jǐngguān? Apologies, have any of you seen Ah Fu... A young police officer with a brim hat tilted at a 15° angle?

[Player] 徳州! 是你-- Dé zhōu! Shì nǐ-- De Zhou! It’s you--

[Narration] 德州 pá 鸡露出讶异的神色‥‥‥ Dézhōu pá jī lùchū yà yì de shénsè‥‥‥ De Zhou Pa Ji shows a surprised expression...

[德州扒鸡] 小姐您认得我吗? 我们曾经见过? Xiǎojiě nín rèndé wǒ ma? Wǒmen céngjīng jiànguò? Young lady, do you recognize me? Have we met before?

德州扒鸡 [文武双绝模范警官] 奔走于津浦线的铁路警官飞鸟徽章乃天下第一的象征荷叶颈饰是涎生时的纪念浑身闪耀理科生的严谨光辉 Dézhōu pá jī wénwǔ shuāng jué mófàn jǐngguān bēnzǒu yú jīnpǔ xiàn de tiělù jǐngguān fēiniǎo huīzhāng nǎi tiānxià dì yī de xiàngzhēng hé yè jǐng shì shì xián shēng shí de jìniàn húnshēn shǎnyào lǐkē shēng de yánjǐn guānghuī De Zhou Braised Chicken [Absolute in civil and military, an exemplary police officer] A railway police officer that rushes about the Jin Pu line The soaring bird crest is the emblem that’s number one under the heavens The lotus leaf necklace is a commemoration of the salivating time of birth Radiates from head to toe the magnificent strictness of a science type student ((?????))

[Player] 我们曾经有过交集, 或许你已经不太记得了……不过, 没关系。 Wǒmen céngjīng yǒuguò jiāojí, huòxǔ nǐ yǐjīng bù tài jìdéliǎo……bùguò, méiguānxì. We crossed paths before, maybe you don’t remember it that well....no matter, it’s not important.

[Player] 我叫[Player], 从空桑而来。不知你对 “空桑”这个名字有没有印象? Wǒ jiào [Player], cóng kōng sāng ér lái. Bùzhī nǐ duì “kōng sāng” zhège míngzì yǒu méiyǒu yìnxiàng? I’m [Player], and I came from Kong Sang. I’m not sure if you have any impression towards the name "Kong Sang"?

[德州扒鸡] 空桑....莫非是那三界交汇之处的美食圣地? 我原以为那只是个传说.... Kōng sāng.... Mòfēi shì nà sānjiè jiāohuì zhī chǔ dì měishí shèngdì? Wǒ yuán yǐwéi nà zhǐshì gè chuánshuō.... Kong Sang... Could it be that sacred land of culinary delicacies at the intersection of the three realms? I thought it was just a legend...

[Player] 你知道空桑? 太好了! 我是空桑少主，正在旅途中寻找愿意加入空桑的食魂。 Nǐ zhīdào kōng sāng? Tài hǎole! Wǒ shì kōng sāng shǎo zhǔ, zhèngzài lǚtú zhōng xúnzhǎo yuànyì jiārù kōng sāng de shí hún. You know Kong Sang? That’s wonderful! I am Kong Sang’s Young Miss, currently on a journey to look for Food Souls who’d be willing to join Kong Sang.

[Player] 不知你愿不愿意随我一同到空桑来? Bùzhī nǐ yuàn bù yuànyì suí wǒ yītóng dào kōng sāng lái? I wonder if you would be willing to come with me to Kong Sang?

[德州扒鸡] 传闻中美食遍地的仙乡, 身为食魂, 当然想要前往一览风光。 Chuánwén zhōng měishí biàndì de xiān xiāng, shēn wèi shí hún, dāngrán xiǎng yào qiánwǎng yīlǎn fēngguāng. The rumoured fairyland filled with Food Souls, as a Food Soul, of course I would like to go to such a scenery.

[德州扒鸡] 何况食魂的本职便是以美食悦人，若能在空桑给更多人带来愉悦, 自是没有理由推脱。 Hékuàng shí hún de běnzhí biàn shì yǐ měishí yuè rén, ruò néng zài kōng sāng gěi gèng duō rén dài lái yúyuè, zì shì méiyǒu lǐyóu tuītuō. What's more, a Food Soul’s purpose is to delight people with delicious delicacies, if more joy could be brought to the people by being in Kong Sang, there’s no reason for me to avoid it.

[德州扒鸡] 只是... Zhǐshì... It’s just...

[Player] 只是? Zhǐshì ? It’s just?

[德州扒鸡] 只是不知弟弟阿符, 是否愿意一同前往…… 不如侍我找到阿符, 同他商量一番之后再作决定，如何? Zhǐshì bùzhī dìdì ā fú, shìfǒu yuànyì yītóng qiánwǎng…… bùrú shì wǒ zhǎodào ā fú, tóng tā shāngliáng yī fān zhīhòu zài zuò juédìng, rúhé? It’s just I’m not sure about my little brother Ah Fu, whether he’d be willing to leave together... It would be better to let me find Ah Fu, discuss with him and make a decision afterwards, how about it?

[Player] 那是自然。不过他刚才追击劫匪去了…… Nà shì zìrán. Bùguò tā gāngcái zhuījí jié fěi qùle…… Naturally. But he just left to chase after the robber...

[德州扒鸡] 他居然孤身去追劫匪了? 他行事鲁莽，我担心-- Tā jūrán gūshēn qù zhuī jié fěile? Tā xíngshì lǔmǎng, wǒ dānxīn-- He chased after the robber by himself? He’s being reckless, I’m worried--

[符离集烧鸡] 我说你这人....怎么一会儿不见, 就跟别人说我的坏话! Wǒ shuō nǐ zhè rén.... Zěnme yīhuǐ'er bu jiàn, jiù gēn biérén shuō wǒ de huàihuà! I tell you this person...Why after not seeing each other for just a little bit, begin talking bad about me to other people!

[Narration] 只见符离集烧鸡像揪鸡崽般揪着晕过去的劫匪, 一腐一拐地向我们走来…… Zhǐ jiàn fú lí jí shāo jī xiàng jiū jī zǎi bān jiūzhe yūn guòqù de jié fěi, yī fǔ yī guǎi dì xiàng wǒmen zǒu lái…… We see Fu Li Ji Shao Ji seizing the fainted robber like seizing a young chicken, limping over towards us...

[符离集烧鸡] 这家伙真够狡猬的, 左拐右拐不知道要往哪里跑，还好我追得紧，没让他逃掉! Zhè jiāhuo zhēn gòu jiǎo wèi de. Zuǒ guǎi yòu guǎi bù zhīdào yào wǎng nǎlǐ pǎo, hái hǎo wǒ zhuī dé jǐn, méi ràng tā táo diào! This guy is really a sly hedgehog, turning left and right without knowing where he’s going run to next, good thing I followed closely behind and didn't let him escape!

[德州扒鸡] 阿符, 你行事太鲁莽了! 孤身一人追击劫匪, 万一他有接头人你又如何对付? 做事要先动脑子。 Ā fú, nǐ xíngshì tài lǔmǎngle! Gūshēn yīrén zhuījí jié fěi, wàn yī tā yǒu jiētóu rén nǐ yòu rúhé duìfù? Zuòshì yào xiān dòng nǎozi. Ah Fu, you’re too reckless! Chasing after the robber alone, what would you do if he had an accomplice? You need to think first.

[符离集烧鸡] 我....嘁! 说到底, 你就是觉得我能力不如你咯! 贼我是抓到了，没缺胳膊也没少腿的! Wǒ.... Qī! Shuō dàodǐ, nǐ jiùshì juédé wǒ nénglì bùrú nǐ gē! Zéi wǒ shì zhuā dàole, méi quē gēbó yě méi shǎo tuǐ de! I....Tch! When all’s said and done, you just think my abilities don’t match up to yours! I caught the thief, without an arm or a leg missing!

[德州扒鸡] 那你走路怎么一瘸一拐的，哪里受伤了! Nà nǐ zǒulù zěnme yī qué yī guǎi de, nǎlǐ shòushāngle! Then why are you walking with a limp, where have you been hurt!

[符离集烧鸡] 就是抓他的时��, 不小心划伤了皮肤而已, 至于这么大惊小怪…… Jiùshì zhuā tā de shíhòu, bù xiǎoxīn huà shāngle pífū éryǐ, zhìyú zhème dàjīngxiǎoguài…… When I caught the thief, I merely got an accidental cut on the skin, you’re fussing over nothing...

[德州扒鸡] ……算了。你先坐下，等我把劫匪带回警察厅, 再拿药箱来给你包扎。 ……Suànle. Nǐ xiān zuò xià, děng wǒ bǎ jié fěi dài huí jǐngchá tīng, zài ná yào xiāng lái gěi nǐ bāozā. ...Forget about it. You sit down first, wait for me to bring the robber back to the police station, and I’ll bring back the medicine box to bandage you.

[符离集烧鸡] 可是我-- Kěshì wǒ-- But I--

[德州扒鸡] 你就待在这里, 别到处乱跑了! Nǐ jiù dài zài zhèlǐ, bié dàochù luàn pǎole! You just stay here, do not run about!

[Narration] 对待旁人亲切谦恭的德州扒鸡, 对待符离集烧鸡却格外严格。 Duìdài pángrén qīnqiè qiāngōng de dézhōu pá jī, duìdài fú lí jí shāo jī què géwài yángé. De Zhou Pa Ji, who usually treats others amiably, is particularly strict towards Fu Ji Li Shao Ji.

[Narration] 阿符似乎憋了一肚子气, 蜷在长凳上，头也撇到一边，故意不看德州…… Ā fú sìhū biēle yī dùzi qì, quán zài cháng dèng shàng, tóu yě piē dào yībiān, gùyì bù kàn dézhōu…… Ah Fu seems to be suffocating with a bellyful of anger, curls up on the bench, tilts his head to the side, purposely not looking at De Zhou...

[Narration] 这两兄弟居于空桑时，常常说不到三句话便会吵起来，没想到他们在过去也是如此.... Zhè liǎng xiōngdì jūyú kōng sāng shí, chángcháng shuō bu dào sān jù huà biàn huì chǎo qǐlái, méi xiǎngdào tāmen zài guòqù yěshì rúcǐ.... When these two brothers lived in Kong Sang, they would often start quarrelling in less than three sentences. I didn’t expect that they’re the same in the past too...

[符离集烧鸡] ......

[Player] ........

[符离集烧鸡] ……你盯着我看做什么。 ……Nǐ dīngzhe wǒ kàn zuò shénme. .....What are you staring at me for.

[Player] 你....讨厌哥哥吗? Nǐ.... Tǎoyàn gēgē ma? Do you...hate your older brother?

[符离集烧鸡] ...我只是不喜欢他天天啰啰嗦嗦管这管那，烦死了…… ... Wǒ zhǐshì bù xǐhuān tā tiāntiān luō luōsuo suo guǎn zhè guǎn nà, fán sǐle…… ...I just don't like him nagging and nagging every day about this and that, so annoying...

[Player] 你们之间..…有认真谈过吗? Nǐmen zhī jiān..…Yǒu rènzhēn tánguò ma? Have the both of you... talked about it seriously?

[符离集烧鸡] 谈什么? 我跟他没什么好谈的! 谈不到两句, 他又该指责我哪里做得不好，我为什么要自讨没趣…… Tán shénme? Wǒ gēn tā méishénme hǎo tán de! Tán bù dào liǎng jù, tā yòu gāi zhǐzé wǒ nǎlǐ zuò dé bù hǎo, wǒ wèishéme yào zì tǎo méiqù…… Talk what? I have nothing good to talk about with him! Speak less than two words, and he’ll already be criticizing me about the things I didn’t do well enough, why would I shoot myself in the foot like that...

[Player] 其实德州只是关心你 , 但他的确管得太严了....或许他该给你一些自由的空间…… Qíshí dézhōu zhǐshì guānxīn nǐ, dàn tā díquè guǎn dé tài yánle.... Huòxǔ tā gāi gěi nǐ yīxiē zìyóu de kōngjiān…… In truth, De Zhou just cares about you, but he is severe in how he handles it... Maybe he should give you some freedom...

[符离集烧鸡] ......

[符离集烧鸡] ……哎等等, 我为什么要跟你说这些? 我们又不是很熟! ……Āi děng děng, wǒ wèishéme yào gēn nǐ shuō zhèxiē? Wǒmen yòu bùshì hěn shú! .....Hey wait wait, why would I want to tell you about these things? We’re not even that familiar with each other!

[Player] 抱歉，不自觉地就, 多管闲事了起来……你别生气! 我没有恶意…… Bàoqiàn, bù zìjué de jiù, duō guǎn xiánshìle qǐlái……nǐ bié shēngqì! Wǒ méiyǒu èyì…… Sorry, unconsciously, I’ve meddled into your business... Don’t be angry! I didn’t have any ill intentions...

[符离集烧鸡] .....

#story #食物语 #the tale of food #tale of food

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acosmic · 5 years ago

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thots on dolls, i'm curious abt how u got into them/what u like abt them

dolls are neat! sometimes you’re a fourteen-year-old kid with unrestricted internet access living in a town without art and a best friend who you hate as much as you hate yourself -- but this friend has good taste sometimes and oh no

they show you, or you find, this, and it’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. (taste is an acquired thing, i don’t know what i was thinking). and then there’s her (it’s been eight years and i’d still sell my soul for her) and her and these and these and even this hideous fucker has amazing detailed construction and tiny intricate details if you look closely even though he’s ugly as all hell (his owner and i are no longer friends, he was not a factor but i’m so glad i get to trash him because jesus christ what IS that). and you look into it a bit further and holy shit you can customize them, they come in one colour and sometimes in pieces and when you’re doing their makeup you’re actually pretty much adding their skin since they don’t have blood vessels or freckles or anything. and you can make their clothes and wigs and shoes (it’s way cheaper that way) and there are wildly different sizes and styles and levels of poseability and they only really became a thing in the late 90s so the older ones look simplistic and awkward but they still look sweet. some of them have intense expressions, or stylized ones, but most of them only come with one face and photographing them is like making postmortem pictures look lifelike.

they have this weird sense of personality to them, even the serene-looking ones. when i bought ada (third link above), it was kind of terrifying? she was tiny and fragile and the seller didn’t put her head on and she came in a pink child-size shoebox with all these tiny tiny clothes and accessories with her face painted on (here she is) and she was literally seventeen centimetres tall. i hate kids, i’m not a fan at all, but it was like seeing a new baby. and then she was a brat! she doesn’t like holding poses, her limbs snap around, her head lolls around on its socket, and she goes cross-eyed if you bump her slightly. she can’t decide on a hairstyle or eye colour, she hated her original face and she hates how i redid it, and she’s too tiny and delicate to take anywhere. i love her so fucking much. i’ve had her since i turned sixteen, and i’m twenty-two now. the reason i like lola so much isn’t just that hesitant alien is a kickass album, it’s because there’s this weird little creature and it’s you and it’s also not you and it’s your best friend and a strong critic of your every move and it’s cute and it’s fuzzy and it’s not real like a person but it’s kind of more real than that?

other dolls are cool too. i’ve spent more time with this $40 impulse purchase than i have with all $200 USD of ada, and i love her a lot too, but in a different way. some people use dolls to “shell” their characters, but mine tend to just happen, and ada’s character is more important than emi’s, no matter how cooperative emi is. one of my other oldest dolls is a pair of legs (because she’s the type you can buy as separate parts) and i keep putting off assembling her entire body because she feels like art and she’s kind of my favourite weird sculpture now. even the ones that don’t work out are really neat to have around -- most doll hobbyists sell members of their collection that don’t work, some are like revolving doors, others keep everything, so there’s always a secondhand market going that you can add to or pull from, or just look at for inspiration.

the customization aspect is really fun, too. some of them you have to reinvent from the ground up (i finally got a blythe and that’s what i’ll be doing with her as soon as my WIP list is at a better point), others you have weirder tasks on, like dyeing or repainting a body to revitalize it/suit a character (doing that to a unoa kit like the one pictured above) or modifying it to improve poseability or visuals (i’ve been hacking at a barbie body so she can bend her legs to fit in her wheelchair). sculpting your own dolls is a super-involved process, but i’ll do that eventually too (reading books about it is really meditative, especially since they tend to be in other languages so you have to inspect the pictures super closely. it’s like targeted dreaming). making doll clothing was a really strong draw for me for a while -- i wasn’t happy with how i exist in a body and it’s never the way i want, so i used dolls as kind of clothing horses for styles or designs i wouldn’t or couldn’t wear myself. now that i feel better about that, the dolls just kind of get what they want (and i’ve been neglecting them to sew for myself lmao but they don’t mind).

my phases run in weird cycles, so i’m really out of the loop on new developments relating to anything other than mattel inc. (the fashion doll community on tumblr is great), but it seems like the hobby is getting a lot more creative and a lot less stale than it was the first couple of times i was really into it. it’s this fluid, ever-changing thing that makes jumping back in really interesting (and a lot of work), but there’s still this comforting base to it that stays the same (use respiratory protection and high-quality materials when doing faceups, don’t buy recasts, volks/fairyland/alchemic labo are popular and cute). and if you swap doll types, there’s months/years more of entertainment. (i have big gay autism, or, like, adhd-autism crux/combination, and research is so fun)

dolls are great! they’re like muses, photography subjects, OCs, clothes horses, mascots, art projects, and (sometimes) investments all at once. whatever kind of phase i’m in, there’s something i can do with them. and they’re good company, and great for decoration and indulging your goth sensibilities and freaking out your visitors if you feel like it

random bag of onions to finish off: creepy and cute are accidental and if you deliberately aim for them you’ll get boring off-base results, what kayla said about s*x dolls applies to other types of doll too (if you try to put too many conventionally attractive features together you’ll just end up with something uncanny and grotesque instead of something really beautiful), toyetic design is for babies, doll hobbyists esp. forum communities still have a lot of unconscious biases esp. racism and homophobia to unpack, recasting is art theft and is killing the community via its artists but barbie/blythe/integrity knockoffs are basically a moral responsibility, and art dolls with huge hips are the new minifee chloes

#this got long because i. dolls.#asks #vampixie

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la-knight · 6 years ago

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BOOKS I (RE)READ IN 2018: FURTHERMORE BY TAHEREH MAFI

"Alice Alexis Queensmeadow, 12, rates three things most important: Mother, who wouldn’t miss her; magic and color, which seem to elude her; and Father, who always loved her. Father disappeared from Ferenwood with only a ruler, almost three years ago. But she will have to travel through the mythical, dangerous land of Furthermore, where down can be up, paper is alive, and left can be both right and very, very wrong. Her only companion is Oliver whose own magic is based in lies and deceit. Alice must first find herself—and hold fast to the magic of love in the face of loss." "Red was ruby, green was fluorescent, yellow was simply incandescent. Color was life. Color was everything. Color, you see, was the universal sign of magic." "Love, it turned out, could both hurt and heal." "Narrow-mindedness will only get you as far as Nowhere, and once you're there, you're lost forever.” "Alice was an odd girl, even for Ferenwood, where the sun occasionally rained and the colors were brighter than usual and magic was as common as a frowning parent." "Making magic is far more interesting than making sense." So I actually read this book a few months ago and then recently reread it via audio so I could remember all the details for this review. I was first introduced to Tahereh Mafi’s work through her book Shatter Me, her debut novel. Ironically, it wasn’t through any of the ways I normally hear about books - Booktube, Goodreads, my best friend, Booklr - but from my husband’s aunt. She runs - or used to run, not sure if she’s still doing it - a book review blog. And she posted a review of Shatter Me and I was like, “What a weird, interesting writing style, lemme check this out.” At this point the entire Shatter Me Trilogy plus novellas had been published and I devoured all of them (still need to review those, too). So when I heard Tahereh Mafi was writing a middle grade book, I got super excited! Especially because this was during a time when I was too stressed out to read any YA, since most of the YA I like involves having to save the world and all the stress that entails. I need to lay out some trigger warnings real quick: the main character, Alice? Her mom is incredibly abusive, both emotionally and physically. It’s treated as not such a big deal in the book, which is honestly the story’s only real flaw, but it’s bad. It took me seven tries and resorting to an audiobook (and even with a fantastic narrator, that short audiobook took me almost a month to get through) because the abuse was so bad. So:

TRIGGER WARNING: THIS BOOK CONTAINS EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE OF A CHILD BY THEIR PARENT

Let’s get started, yo! First of all, the setting. OMG. See, I love tthis thing called Victorian fairy tales, which is something you can find in books like Mary Poppins - these super fantastical bits of whimsy that just warm your heart and make you grin because they’re so creative and fun. In the Mary Poppins books, you can jump into chalk drawings and go to a circus amidst the stars and make friends with a woman who sells living candy-cane horses. In Catherynne Valente’s Fairyland series, there are shadow balls and talking phonographs. And in Furthermore, there’s light raining down from the sky in literal drops, sticks of magic you use like money, and forests full of invisible berries. The way the world is put together and described, so full of color and imagination, is awesome and beautiful and I could picture it perfectly. It reminded me in all the best ways of books like The Phantom Tollbooth (one of my favorites). But I wouldn’t want to live there, because Ferenwood is full of colorism and ick. Alice, the female lead, is an albino in a world where color is important and the darker you are, the more magical you’re considered to be. So Alice gets treated like garbage.

Also I think Alice may be autistic, but I don’t know if she’s deliberately coded autistic or if Tahereh Mafi did it by accident while trying to make Alice eccentric, but she comes across as autistic. I’ve actually begun to pay more attention to that sort of the thing in recent years, being autistic myself, and I see it a lot - authors giving their characters autistic characteristics, often without meaning to. I just touch on it here because Alice is already treated badly for being albino, but she’s also considered a freak because of the way she behaves - like an autistic preteen. And I wonder if Tahereh Mafi did that on purpose as a sort of commentary or not, because while Alice is treated badly by the people of Ferenwood for her behavior, the Narrator (who is an actual character in the story; love when that happens) always sides with Alice in this regard. The storyline is sweet and I love it. Alice tries to compete in the magical testing all the preteens do on their twelfth birthday, and so she dances. And her dancing is magical but it’s not Magical, you know? So she fails the test. Well, turns out a boy who passed the test the year before, Oliver (the brat), needs Alice’s help fulfilling a quest - rescuing Alice’s missing dad. So they go on a quest together, although Alice hates Oliver (and rightly so, he’s rude). They go to a dozen different and cool places, all of which are dangerous and all of which are different. I wish we could’ve spent more time in those places but I understand why we didn’t. The only annoying thing is there’s an origami fox on the cover but it only pops up in one of the worlds for like two pages and then it’s gone and I thought we could spend more time both in that world and with that creature since it ended up on the cover. But alas, not. I understand why - middle grade is often cursed to be short, especially if it’s the author’s first MG novel ever. Once you get big and bad like Rick Riordan you can start tossing out gihugic tomes like Son of Neptune or Blood of Olympus on the regular. Oliver’s reason for needing Alice was one I didn’t see coming, nor was her magical talent - a talent they hint at throughout the book but never explain until near the end, at the perfect moment. I thought it was an interesting commentary on how young girls perceive themselves, that Alice hates this marvelous, amazing talent she has of bringing color into the world from nothing...because she can’t use it to change how she looks. Society has trained her already, by the age of twelve, to discount something incredible about herself because she can’t use it to make herself into what society wants her to be. That’s pretty impressive for a book this short. I loved some of the more deliberate messages in the work - the thing I mentioned about society’s pressures on young girls, and also that it’s okay to tell boys to screw off if they’re mean to you, and to have hope and to look for second chances (Alice thinks she only has one chance to pass the test and believes her life is over when she fails, only to find out she can try again the next year). I love all of that, and the lyrical and whimsical quality of the prose, and the world building is so creative and also makes me a bit hungry (people eat magic in this book, among other things; I wonder what it tastes like). Now...let’s talk about the abuse. That’s my biggest issue with the book. Alice’s mother is a total bitch. And not in a cool, kickass way like the lady in the show Empire. She’s vicious, she’s cruel, and she’s abusive. Alice knows - and the Narrator confirms - that she turned bad when her husband went missing, and apparently the worry for him and the strain of raising four kids on her own is making her hard and sad, but I don’t give a shit. I was hoping Tahereh Mafi would’ve gone all Hansel and Gretel on this lady and when Alice comes home with her dad, the wife’s dead or something. She beats Alice (at one point she beat Alice for chasing a boy out of the place where she was sleeping, even though he kept staring at her in her sleeping clothes, because apparently the boy - Oliver - had the right to break into their barn at 3AM and ogle Alice???), she verbally abuses Alice, she sends her to bed regularly without dinner, is constantly criticizing, won’t hug her or kiss her, and - this one really got me, for some reason - forces her to do illegal things. Those invisible berries I mentioned? Alice can find them and bring back whole baskets because of her magical gift, and so her mom sends her out to pick them all the time. If she brings home enough, her mom smiles. If she doesn’t, her mom yells and calls her names and sometimes beats her. Guess what? Picking those berries is illegal. We don’t find this out until much later in the book, but it is. The thing I didn’t like about the berries is that Oliver, who’s thirteen, is less concerned about Alice’s mother beating her for not picking enough contraband berries and instead focuses on how her ability to find the berries in the first place means Alice has really impressive magic. NOBODY seems to care how much Alice is being abused, not even the Narrator. The Narrator sympathizes with Alice’s hurt feelings and despair over her missing Father, but it’s never objectively stated that her mom is abusing her AND SHE IS. Yeah, her mom is sooo glad to have her back after Alice almost dies on her trip with Oliver, but so what? My roommate’s mom is so abusive that my roommate’s clergy leaders, doctors, and psychological therapist all said my roommate needed to cut ties with said mom, even though my roommate’s mom has also exhibited the same kind of “oh baby I’m so sorry, I love you so much” bullshit. That’s what abusers do. So I hate Alice’s mom. She literally makes her daughter feel like if she doesn’t risk her life numerous times AND bring her father back, there is no chance her mother will ever love her. And if she pulls that stuff off (which she does), then MAYBE her mother will love her. Nuh-uh. Nope. Hate that bitch. Other than that, I really loved this book. The characters felt real (Alice is me, but without my anger), Even the ones I didn’t like were still REAL, and well-drawn. The world building and word choice is fantastic. Basically, if you can get past the evil mom, read this book. World Building: 1 star Realism: 1 star Word Choice: 1 star Plot: 1 star Characterization: 1 star - ¼ star because Oliver Newbanks is an obnoxious little creep - 1 star because the mom is AN ABUSIVE EVIL BITCH - ¼ star because NOBODY DOES ANYTHING ABOUT THAT +½ star because Alice is amazing and has a genius brain and I love her Total score: 4/5 stars Would I Buy It: Yes! I own it and loved it enough I got the sequel for Christmas (in...2017...I've been sitting on this review for months...)! Would I Recommend: yes, but with trigger warnings. Again, highly abusive evil bitch mom who somehow doesn’t die.

#books of 2018 #book review #aesthetic #Furthermore #Tahereh Mafi

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lobocomicsandtoys · 4 years ago

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ME YOU LOVE IN THE DARK #1 (OF 5)

Published by IMAGE COMICS Written by Skottie Young Art by Jorge Corona

Writer SKOTTIE YOUNG (I HATE FAIRYLAND, Deadpool, Strange Academy) and artist JORGE CORONA (NO. 1 WITH A BULLET, Super Sons, Feathers) follow up their critically acclaimed series MIDDLEWEST with a brand-new haunting tale. An artist named Ro retreats from the grind of the city to an old house in a small town to find solace and inspiration without realizing the muse within is not what she expected. Fans of Stephen King and Neil Gaiman will enjoy this beautiful, dark, and disturbing story of discovery, love, and terror.

Available at Lobo Comics & Toys this coming Wednesday, 07/28/2021

visit us on facebook, google+, blogspot, our eBay store, and our website

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agapaic · 8 years ago

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Dude, you're a breath of fresh air. Finally someone with an honest opinion about 19 days. I'm getting quite sick of all the people who have their stick so far up their..It's fine if you want to glorify everything about 19 days, but don't drag everybody into that fairyland of make believe. Must we all think a like? NO. So let people have their own respectful opinion and stop hating on them 'cause they share a different one. Anyway, please don't let certain people get to you. Keep writing amazing!

Hey, thank you! I’m guessing this is in response to this post but honestly it could be about my blog in general?

Like you said: I understand people want others to see fandom how they see it, and that’s great! Shared perspectives are fantastic insights into things we might not individually have come up with. Fandom is a collective, collaborative environment. Seeing 19 Days with a positive/harmless filter is fine. Seeing it with a critical/realistic filter is fine.

It’s not about setting a standard, precedent, or list of rules that must be adhered to. It’s not ‘hate’ if someone’s opinion deviates from yours. It’s toxic and shaming to vilify others because it’s not how you interpret the same content.

If we want to criticise characters with good reason, then we should be able to. If we want to explore our own experiences of shame, guilt, betrayal, abuse through characters/tropes, then we should be able to. We are not the characters. We are not hating on you, a real person, if we criticise a character/medium.

I could go on about this. I really could. My stepping out of the fandom is partly due to this tbh, as well as some personal trials I’m facing. I don’t like coming back only to be faced with this kind of thing every time. It’s boring, and it’s anti-progressive, and it’s stifling. We should be welcoming growth and innovation and analysis (in all aspects of life, not just something like this).

Just…………………………… Yeah. I don’t fucking know what’s going on anymore lmfao !!! I appreciate your words, and I’m glad you’ve enjoyed my fics!

#19 days #19 days discourse #i guess?#who gives a fuck anymore lmfao #Anonymous #asks

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mostlysignssomeportents · 8 years ago

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Cat Valente on writers and haters #5yrsago

Cat Valente, author of such outstanding novels as The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making and Deathless, is guest-editing Charlie Stross's blog, posting writing advice. Part one, published yesterday, covered some good ground, and today's continuation is especially good, with advice on coping with haters -- useful perspective for more than just writers.

People Are Going to Shit All Over You

Oh, yes they are. It really doesn't matter if you try to do something different or you just want to rescue the princess in the tower. It'll start with your teachers, in college or high school or workshops. You are going to have to hear, more than once, more than ten times, that not only does your work suck, but it betrays some signal flaw within yourself, and you as a person are terrible for having written this thing. This is true, basically, no matter what you write. It is especially true if you are trying something off the beaten path, whether that beaten path is one of bestsellers or your teacher's own predilictions. I have personally had verse and chorus of "Nothing" from A Chorus Line spewed at me from numerous teachers. For those of you not musically inclined, it goes something like: you're bad at this, you'll never amount to anything, give up and work at a gas station and leave this to the real artists. One professor literally threw up his hands at our final conference and said "You're just going to do whatever you want no mater what I say so there's no point in even trying to teach you about good writing."

We all have stories like that, I suspect. Most particularly those of us who write SFF, which makes no friends in universities. The best part is, it doesn't stop there! Once you're published, new and exciting people will appear to tell you how bad your work is, even if you are popular and/or critically acclaimed. And it will get personal, especially if you are throwing down with your whole being, laying your kinks and history on the page like a sacrifice. If you're a woman, or other-than-white, or queer, it will probably, at some point, get really personal. Many readers have a huge problem separating the work from the creator. The mountain of crap I got for writing Palimpsest, both in public venues and in private emails, would make you crawl under the table with a bottle of fuck-you whiskey. I not only wrote a bad book, but I am sexually disturbed (I either hate sex or like it way too much, depending on who you ask) and politically suspect. Give up and work in a gas station. Name a book you think is universally liked and I will find someone saying it is a sin against man, decency, and the dictionary. People get very invested in books, which is the whole point of writing books. I have myself gotten upset to tears over books and have said so online. I try not to do that unless at great need now. I know too much.

It's easy to say: you must develop grace about this. I doubt anyone actually has grace about it. We all get mad or sad or hit the bar and rage against it all. It takes a really long time, or a really good internet filter, to be ok with how much some people will not like your work and by extension you. I'm not saying get grace at the bargain virtue store.

But you can fake grace.

https://boingboing.net/2012/02/13/cat-valente-on-writers-and-hat.html

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graphicpolicy · 8 years ago

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WARNING: MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD

“JENNIFER WALTERS has survived the Civil War…barely…and having risen from the rubble, she re-enters the world a different kind of hero. Fueled by a quiet rage, she is determined to move forward, to go on with her life, but the pain of the past and all she’s lost is always there – an undercurrent, a pulse, waiting to quicken and trigger Jen’s transformation into the one thing she doesn’t have control over…”

–From the Marvel Comics website

Ah, Hulk. I’ve been waiting for this one. Strange to say since my general attitude toward Marvel and DC comics is mostly derision. Can you blame me? One company protects a serial sexual harasser while firing women who dare speak out. The other is run by a Trump lover, making Hydra something of an all too poignant allegory for the company. I don’t care for the majority of their comics, especially their world events that operate as a way to temporarily spike sales, ultimately crashing and burning while receiving the hissing, clawing displeasure of both fans and critics. With Marvel, the recent blunder is Civil War II, a gimmicky cash grab for an enjoyable movie based on terrible source material that got delayed so many times that the books taking place after the event came out before it even concluded.

Just like the original Civil War, the sequel is guilty of character assassination, unnecessary conflict, unnecessary death, and ruining a whole bunch of comics people were enjoying. NEVER FORGIVE THEM FOR WHAT THEY DID TO CAROL DANVER! I mean, I don’t care about her, but turning her into a fascist ruined her relationship with Ms. Marvel, by far the best, most relatable Marvel character to come out since the Runaways. She was my generation’s Peter Parker, and now she’s lost both her idol and her friends as a result. Marvel ruined her. RUINED HER, I SAY!

Also, why was Tony Stark against Danver’s Minority Report shtick? I mean, this was a man who in the original series OK’d a metahuman registration program that probably made Trump cream his pants. Tony is practically a fascist himself. God, even Captain America is a Nazi now! I mean, so many of the heroes have turned into villains themselves and…

Aw, forget it. I could go all day long about everything wrong with Civil War II, but naw. I avoided that garbage and I don’t want to waste time talking about it either.

So, why in the world would I be reviewing Hulk, a comic that happened as a direct result of this nonsense? I should be angry given Bruce Banner, one of my favorite Marvel characters, died. I should be with the Marvel Zombies grabbing their axes and lead pipes smashing windows and burning cars over it. However, after reading about the series from Mariko Tamaki and Nico Leon, I had to check it out.

Oh, I know. There are those that don’t want Jennifer Walters to be angry, traumatized Hulk. They love her as She-Hulk! Big green lawyer lady that breaks the fourth wall, cracks jokes, and goes on crazed hijinks with Patsy Walker. Now, I haven’t been a lifelong fan of She-Hulk. The first thing I read starring her was the short-lived series by Charles Soule and Javier Pulido. That comic was fun! Like watching your favorite Saturday morning cartoon show while listening to your favorite indie rock band. I can see why people are so attached to happy Jen. She’s a blast.

However, I must defend this new, darker approach to her. As much as I love ladies having fun, I prefer when they’re angry monsters. In fact, it seems recently that a new breed of female lead comics that center on women being some kind of monstrosity has risen: Monstress, Insexts, She Wolf, Cry Havoc, and even the mass murderer Gertrude from I Hate Fairyland. These women are angry, broken by whatever is afflicting them, and they’re ready to let it out in a wave of unprecedented carnage. The best part about this trend is how subversive these monstrous women are. Their monstrosities might at first seem like afflictions, but they slowly develop into a form of empowerment.

Happy is good, but monstrous is better.

So, how does this route go for Jennifer Walters? Well, I’m happy to say that Hulk is a bold new take on the character that will draw readers in not with endless action, but atmospheric art, character-focused drama, and a unique horror tone tackling trauma head on.

The covers of Jeff Dekal take a unique approach in conveying monstrous rage. Instead of showing actual destruction, as was Banner Hulk’s trademark, Cover #1 shows Jen grasping the logo tightly, seemingly on the cusp of crumbling it to pieces. Yes, it’s a violent image, but not in the sense of catastrophic physical violence, but poignant emotional violence. Jen is trying to hold back her rage, resisting the urge to destroy. After all, that’s what Bruce did, a man who couldn’t control the beast within. Jen is supposed to be different, supposed to be healthy and balanced. However, given the trauma she suffered in Civil War II, Jen’s on the breaking point. This is what Dekal masterfully conveys. Also, have to give huge props for coloring Jen gray. I suspect it’s a callback to Gray Hulk, a version of the character that I sometimes prefer over the Emerald Giant.

Cover #2 also takes a unique approach to violence in showing its aftermath. The punch-cracked window, Jen’s hands clawing upward, indicates how she momentarily lost control and there was a negative consequence. She’s trying to hold it back again. Slip-ups happen, right? However, when you’re a gamma-radiant monster, slip-ups tend to end up sucking for everyone around you. The coloring of Jen is quite interesting. I don’t understand why her skin is pink (call back to the Red Hulks, maybe?), but I love how there is a creeping network of gray veins slowly covering her body. To me, this symbolizes the Hulk inside of Jen, the one she’s trying to hold back. It’s also symbolic of the negative emotions she feels: anger, depression, and helplessness.

I think it is important to note how green has more prominence than Cover #1. The glow is notably on the walls. It seems to mean Jen’s control is slipping. Again, so much about the conflict of the comic, the overriding theme of struggling with anger and trauma is masterfully conveyed on the covers. I’ve recently talked about the importance of covers conveying a story’s theme and hooking a reader at the same time. For the covers of Hulk, Jeff Dekal hits a bullseye twice.

So, how does the interior art hold up in comparison? Nico Leon’s style creates a deceptively quiet atmosphere that aches with tension. Matt Milla’s coloring adds to this with a soft color palette. In issue #1’s opening scene, Jen’s apartment has a gray tone to it. It’s a huge space, some objects built to accommodate She-Hulk’s size. However, now that Jen is in human mode, the objects are hilariously oversized. In this empty apartment, with its many objects, Jen seems tiny and isolated. It’s strange because it is both calm and tense at the same time. It has to do with how Jen’s inner monologue, full of polarizing emotion, turns the plainness of the apartment into a mask. Leon’s depiction of Jen’s mute expression further pushes this idea of plainness as a mask for turmoil. Reading the comic is the same as visiting the hospital for an urgent report. You’re sitting in the waiting room, made as nice and homely as possible, but you’re still tapping your foot because once the doctor enters, it could be life or death. This is the atmosphere of the comic. Sometimes, it’s suffocating, but always poignant.

Leon and Milla also shine in their portrayal of New York City. Instead of trying to recreate it as the grim concrete jungle it no longer is, they showcase the city in its present decorum of bright colors, modernized architecture, and streets full of yuppies in designer clothing. These are also the scenes where letterer Cory Petit gets creative. A scene in a subway has big letters crowded with the sea of bodies, demonstrating the overpopulated, noisy experience of living in New York. Just like with the apartment, Jen’s isolation is noticeable and just as emotionally complex, simultaneously calm and tumultuous.

Although the art team certainly excels in environmental atmosphere, they fall a little short with character design. They’re not bad, but not memorable either. It might have to do with the lack of detail. Leon’s faces are simplistic, most of them eerily similar. I noticed this when contrasted with the art of Dalibor Talajic in issue #2, pages 4-6. Talajic adds more details that make faces distinguishable. Also, ages are recognizable. I couldn’t nail Jen’s age with Leon, but Talajic easily places her from late 20s to 30s. Another thing that I don’t like about Leon’s characters are the eyes. When closed, they look like a cutesy style anime character. Leon might be influenced by anime and manga to a certain extent, but this element of the art clashes with the tone of the comic.

However, there are exceptions, most notably the amazing designs of metahumans. They are creative, unique, and diverse. Already, one of these metahumans, Miss Brewn, has become an important side character. In fact, just like Soule and Pulido’s run, I hope Jen ends up representing a number of crazy characters and exploring their back-stories.

The hallmark of Hulk is Mariko Tamaki’s writing. I was interested to see how a writer well known for her indie drama work like This One Summer and Skim would do with a mainstream cape comic. Can she bring the same complex, emotional drama? The answer is almost. There is still the limitation of a 20-21 page-count that prevents extensive development, not to mention some campy elements, such as a sketchy landlord character that acts like a Sopranos extra.

The rest of Tamaki’s writing pulls off an astonishing feat of taking the concept of Hulk and bringing it down to reality. Now, this isn’t impossible and has been done before as evidence by Bruce Jones’ amazing run. Here, however, it is even more so because instead of starting off with a tale of espionage, it’s one of recovery. I will admit to having been trepidatious about trauma as a central theme, not because I doubted in Tamaki’s writing abilities, but worried that funneling it through a cape comic would make depictions over the top or offensive. Thankfully, that’s not the case. There are no gross scenes of Jen crying in a shower naked while chugging bottles of whiskey, and moaning about how she can’t go on without Bruce! Oh Woe is a world so cruel and unfair! HAWTHRONE HEIGHTS RULEZ!!!

That nonsense is absent. Instead, trauma is depicted accurately. Jen gets up each day and tries to live a normal life. She goes to work, eat bagels at a café, and have a coffee while watching children ice-skating in the park. She doesn’t interact much with people. Currently, Jen feels the need to be alone. This will probably be disappointing to folks that love Jen as a snappy joker with lots of friends, but it’s relatable to some people that have experienced trauma. It is important to reach out and let people aid you, but it’s also helps to be alone sometimes. Being alone is a time to be at peace, to clear your mind and experience life instead of over-thinking it.

The few interactions Jen has with people are still supportive. There is Patsy who sends positive text messages, and Bradley, Jen’s gay secretary, who keeps her busy and provides her a packet of nuts after a bad spell of rage. There is also Miss Brewn, Jen’s client, who brings out the best part of the character: her heroism. Even if Jen’s no longer fighting along with super folks, she still dedicates herself as a lawyer, protecting clients from harm and making sure their justice. This is important again in approaching trauma from a mature, complex angle. Tamaki shows that there is room for positivity, to be able to function and be happy, even while in the midst of coping. There is even humor, both laughs and heroism balance out the darker parts of the comic.

As for trauma, the core of the story, Tamaki & Co. explores it in a unique way. Jen’s trauma is triggered when mentions of Bruce and the Hulk are made. It reminds her of the pain she has been through, of the fact her own Hulk form is now uncontrollable, something welling up and ready to burst. In these scenes, green becomes a dominant color. At their worst, Jen’s eyes turn green, the veins around them glow, and she glares and grits her teeth. The Hulk is trying to claw out, but unlike Bruce who always lost control automatically, Jen is able to force it back down. Unfortunately, this resistance clearly causes her pain. This pain symbolizes the agony of trauma itself, how it takes it toll on both the mind and body. Also, how long can Jen’s efforts last? It seems to be only a matter of time before her control slips completely.

The way these scenes are depicted is best described as atmospheric horror. The darkness, the intensity of glowing green, Jen’s contorting face of anger, are images that make the reader feel uneasy, ready to jump out of their seat as they prepare for the worst. This is how the best horror scares its audience, not through jump scares or extreme violence, but the dread of anticipation. It’s the feeling of walking alone in a street at night and there are either footsteps or strange noises trailing behind. You keep walking. You don’t dare turn around out of fear that it will be the moment the stalker strikes, yet at the same time its agonizing not knowing who or what it is. The creative team nails this type of horror down, with the added emotional resonance of knowing these scenes symbolize Jen’s trauma. It agonizes the reader into caring for Jen, if that makes sense. They know how much pain she is, and now want to see her persevere and survive. It’s similar to the final girl trope from slasher films.

The comic manages to balance out both the light and dark parts of Jen’s story. Seeing her both in pain and triumphant when the time comes is a satisfying emotional wheel for those that like protagonists to go through a personal trial before getting a happy ending. Sometimes, it can feel a little over the top, but never exploitative. Best of all, the story is told without the overuse of action that’s prevalent in modern superhero comics. Each issue unfolds like the chapter of a book, focusing on character development and dialogue. This approach reminds me of the masterful Vision series by Tom King and Gabriel Hernandez Walta. Both series read more like literary horror than superhero adventure. This style is not for everyone, and there will still be people that don’t enjoy this type of story, especially those who don’t want it happening to Jen. However, I have to take a stand and say it is executed expertly. Tamaki, Leon, and everyone else involved obviously understand people’s concerns for the character, and from what I have seen so far are giving her the respect she deserves.

One last thing I want to comment on is both the title of the series and that of the current story arc. It’s called “Deconstruction.” Why? My theory based on the content is that this arc, and the series as a whole, is attempting to deconstruct the character. Hulk, in relation to Bruce Banner, has always been associated with pain, destruction, and mental illness. His death can be seen as the finality of those negative attributes. It is something seen in stories time and time again. The monster, symbolic of the things that bother humanity, must die. Jen was different. Yes, she started off just as savage, but eventually attained control of her other self, even going so far as live daily as She-Hulk. That gift was taken away from her with the death of Bruce, and now her Hulk form afflicts her just as much as it did him.

Perhaps this is necessary. Now that Hulk is dead, and Jen claims the name, it’s almost saying that she has to be stuck with the original meaning of the name, not empowerment but destruction. It should be noted how the events that caused the scenario were mandated by a mostly male creative team. So, while it is easy to give praise for titling the series Hulk instead of She-Hulk to erase gender labels, it could also be said that the old male meaning behind Hulk is now inflicted upon a woman. As I mentioned before, monsters are often symbolic of everything that is wrong with the world, and anyone or anything labeled as such tends to be set up for elimination. After all, society can’t have an ugly manifestation of its dark side stalking about.

However, there is an opportunity for the monstrosity to become a form of empowerment. In the female monster titles I mentioned, monstrous women are immediately put in the box of wrong and afflicted by (mostly male) society’s perceptions of monsters. Jen is similarly afflicted, dealing with her cousin’s legacy, one of contempt from the world at large. But she’s not letting this legacy hold her down. Jen is still being Jen. Furthermore, the series would be smart in showing a transition of Jen reclaiming control of her hulk form and, on a larger scale, breaking down the old concept of Hulk and reconstructing it as something positive. Being a monster can become empowering rather than afflicting.

Only two issues in, Hulk is full of potential. If it lasts long enough and the creative team grows Jen in the right path, it may become an engaging tale of trauma, monstrosity, and reclaiming one’s identity. With atmospheric art, an emotionally complex story, and unique horror tone, I would recommend this title to anyone that loves the character. She might not be the She-Hulk of old, but she is no less fun to read.

Story: Mariko Tamaki Art: Nico Leon, Matt Milla, Cory Petit, Dalibor Talajic Story: 9.5 Art: 8.5 Overall: 9 Recommendation: Buy

Make Me Angry: Hulk #1-2 Review #comics #marvel #hulk WARNING: MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD “JENNIFER WALTERS has survived the Civil War…barely…and having risen from the rubble, she re-enters the world a different kind of hero.

#comic books #Comics #cory petit #dalibor talajic #featured #mariko tamaki #marvel #matt milla #nico leon

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coin-news-blog · 5 years ago

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Mark Cuban: Don't Convince Me, Convince Your Neighbor About Bitcoin

New Post has been published on https://coinmakers.tech/news/mark-cuban-dont-convince-me-convince-your-neighbor-about-bitcoin

Mark Cuban: Don't Convince Me, Convince Your Neighbor About Bitcoin

Crypto supporters need to show their neighbors its value, not rely on the academic discussions to bring the consumers in, believes billionaire Mark Cuban, an American businessman and investor, and the owner of the NBA’s Dallas Mavericks. Crypto supporters, however, find flaws in his arguments.

In a discussion on Twitter, Cuban says that he’s not opposed to Bitcoin (BTC) and understands the arguments around it, but if those who support Bitcoin have neighbors who “don’t see value, that is the problem you need to solve” as “the world is littered with great products/services that failed for lack of consumers,” he says.

"Lots of people are trying to change my mind. My mind will be changed not by technical discussions about fiat currency, sharpe ratios, valuation projections, protocol comparisons, etc. It will be changed by actual usage by consumers, who choose BTC over the many other options," he adds.

The thread, however, saw a number of discussions being led, which are at the heart of the Cryptosphere.

Whom and how to convince?

People debate who it is that “we” really need to convince and how. It’s not defined who “we/you” are exactly, but from the talk, it’s likely safe to say it’s all crypto supporters. Cuban argues that he’s not the one that these crypto supporters need to convince, after Anthony Pompliano, co-founder of digital asset manager Morgan Creek, offered to fly to Dallas and explain to Cuban the information that is currently available and that refute the claims he is making, asking “what would make you change your mind on Bitcoin?”

Cuban, however, refused the offer, finding Pompliano too subjective for such a discussion, and saying that technical and academic discussions on crypto and fiat – perhaps like the counterarguments aerospace and investor Preston Pysh kept on providing – “rarely change hearts and minds of consumers.”

BTC is available in this country and many others for almost no cost. The percentage of consumers choosing it as a methodologically for payment or SOV is infinitesimal. It's almost free and few want to use it. We started taking BTC in 2015 and again last yr with 5 total trx.

— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) December 12, 2019

However, people didn’t find this argument particularly convincing for a number of reasons, asking what he means by “neighbors”? Some found it a misleading term, as they weren’t sure if Cuban meant it literally or not. Those that are important here, says blockchain and smart contracts pioneer Nick Szabo, are “those we exchange substantial funds with: e.g. major suppliers & customers, bosses, employees.”

David Nage, Principal at Arca Funds, an investment management firm, also joined the discussion, telling Cuban that “There’s a 1B who play games”, adding, “they all have in-game digital currencies in them For too long we’ve been trying to jam a square peg in a round hole. It’s this demographic/consumer group that, in my opinion, will be the mass 2nd wave adopters of Bitcoin & other digital assets.” With massive advancement in the game and blockchain industry, others too believe that “in-game currencies can be issued in crypto form with native settlement in BTC,” pushing the adoption forward.

Meanwhile, some, like Dan Smith who is Director of Product and Operations at Lightning Network application company Suredbits, find that “the first real "users" of crypto are likely at recess right now (or younger),” adding “BTC is a longer term play than most investors are comfortable with.”

4) Capitalism harnesses the best product that meets demand, but my argument with tech is that it starts with younger generations & extends to older ones to scale. So yes, we need more adoption, but I think the generational interest is a critical factor you miss

— Alex Von Schulze (@avonschulze) December 13, 2019

Either way, people seem to agree that tech jargon is not helpful when trying to onboard people. It’s also important to note that Cuban’s very own worries are rather tech-related, such as “quantum computing and legacy keys and the cost of creating more advanced keys” – and these are already far from any regular neighbor Joe would know about. So there’s also a discussion to be had on how to approach people when explaining complex topics.

Besides, one could also argue that Cuban too is a ‘neighbor’ of sorts, especially since he’s in the midst of these discussions (and he’s likely some bitcoiner’s real neighbor), so there’s certainly merit then in convincing him as well by Cuban’s own logic.

Price, reliability and gold

Though majority of supporters believe that BTC price will go higher, it’s still a question of how and when. Nonetheless, Pysh added that the neighbors don’t have money and that “the people that are going to drive the price up are the ones that try to sell their 19 trillion dollars of negative yield fixed income debt (and aggressively growing) that exists in the world.”

Cuban though, finds that the price is not a reflection of anything but supply and demand now. “Expected scarcity and cost of production in the future are not predictive of anything. Nothing. So much can and will change and that is the point I’m making,” he says.

That said, there’s at least one BTC supporter, a popular crypto analyst, who seems to agree with Cuban.

I second this. If you think Bitcoin is – easy to use – easy to protect – easy to understand – easy to value (referencing s2f, lmao)

*today*

then sorry, you live in a fairyland. Even more true for the rest of crypto. https://t.co/QwK7buFjov

— Hasu (@hasufl) December 12, 2019

Meanwhile, the discussion touched on the topic of fiat and gold again. Previously, Cuban said that he hates gold and that it’s a religion.

How long have crypto advocates been saying the exact same thing ? And don't gold standard advocates say pretty much the same thing ?

— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) December 10, 2019

In the meantime, Cuban also said recently that there is ‘no chance’ for BTC to become a reliable currency. “Not because it can’t work technically, although there are challenges, it could, but rather because it’s too difficult to use, too easy to hack, way too easy to lose, too hard to understand, too hard to assess a value,” and it’s “too much work for people to know why BTC over” all other cryptos, he is quoted as saying in an article by a Forbes contributor.

In the end, nothing was solved and everything’s back to square one, but it can be argued that having some sort of a discussion is still a positive thing.

One more opinion for the end:

This thread touches on the importance of improving education not only surrounding Bitcoin, but finance/economics in general. Financial illiteracy is a serious problem.

— Sam Callahan (@samcallah) December 12, 2019

Source: cryptonews.com

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patheticphallacy · 6 years ago

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Hallo!

So let’s start this post by referencing the major creative crisis I went through this month, stemming from a blogging rut I found myself in beginning in July. I’ve got through it now, and I have basically the next month and a half of content already scheduled in preparation for my return to Uni, but the rut was real, guys.

I spend a lot of time on my posts and I found myself very low regarding the content and the amount of response I get to what I post. I know blogging is a lengthy process, I’m not going to immediately get response considering the blog is only just over two years old, and I genuinely love writing these posts and reviews. It’s a worry I tackle often, but sometimes it just gets to me and makes me feel kind of hopeless of ever getting over my general anxiety regarding interacting with other people. I keep my distance just because I don’t know how to make friends in the community, and I feel like that translates over to my blog sometimes too, but I’m really trying to change that by talking to more people!

Other than that: August was boring. I read, I watched random stuff, and I worked overtime shifts so I have enough money for rent when Uni starts. I’m honestly a pretty boring person during off-time from University just because of how far away I am from people, combined with my lack of money. Maybe next Summer will be more exciting.

I also want to add that my blog is going to be a lot busier now the end of the year is approaching. I always seem to have a calm period in November, but every other month, expect chaos! Good chaos, though. Friendly chaos. October is a great month for me as I love horror and supernatural things, which means I have twice as many post ideas.

READING WRAP UP

Assassination Classroom Volume 3-4 by Yusei Matsui– I expect to read more Assassination Classroom this month, but I ended up starting another popular manga series (that’ll come up later). I did enjoy these two volumes, and we got some intriguing looks into Korosensei’s backstory.

Ibitsu by Haruto Ryo– I hated this. Straight up. It felt very targeted towards the humiliation of teenage girls with a lot of unneeded torture and nudity, and I just felt sick after reading it, and not in a way I can enjoy with some stories.

Bond of Dreams, Bond of Love Volume 1-4 by Yayu Sakuragi– This is an age-gap romance between an 18 year old and his childhood friend who is… six/eight years older than him, one of the two. There were some really weird moments, for sure, and I won’t dispute that the age gap was kinda gross at points, but I feel like by the end the conversations on adulthood and the main character finally having his frustrations recognised meant a lot.

My Love Story Volume 7-13 by Kazune Kawahara– I’m in a perpetual state of mourning now that I’ve finished this series. It’s one of my all-time favourites. The ending is so heartfelt and they get into heavier issues towards the final volume that I feel helped carry the main relationship from feeling young into adulthood as the characters began college. It addresses jealousy and feelings of incompetence, while never belittling the trust these characters have in one another. It’s handled so maturely and so unlike other stories, and I’m satisfied with the conclusion, even if my heart is broken.

My Hero Academia Vigilantes Volume 4 by Hideyuki Furuhashi– Not as good as volume 3, but has some solid character development and we finally have a showdown of sorts. This does end on a cliffhanger, fair warning.

Starlike Words by Junko– Reaaaally didn’t like this. Poor development of character and relationship and the nudity felt gratuitous and gross, especially considering these characters are only 15/16.

These Witches Don’t Burn by Isabel Sterling– Another one that disappointed me. I have a review for this linked at the end of this post, just know that I had issues with the treatment of toxic relationships and a victim blaming attitude.

Peter and Alice by John Logan– An OK read that’s very meta, a play that imagines the meeting behind Peter Llewelyn Davies and Alice Liddell in 1932. It’s very tragic and the weaving of the characters they inspired into their own stories was incredible, but I found myself thinking the whole time about how this… probably didn’t happen. I know I should have suspended my disbelief, it just felt impossible.

One Piece Volume 1-11 by Eiichiro Oda– EE. This series is great! I literally started the longest running manga series I’ve come across so far and I don’t regret starting it, even if I did at first. The first 100 chapters have flown by with incredible character development and a wonderful world being shaped, and I adore it.

Their Body and Their Afterthought by Shelby Eileen– Not my favourite poetry collection. I don’t want to be too harsh, but it felt like it reiterates what I’ve read in other collections on similar themes and issues without ever offering anything new with form.

I Hate Fairyland Volume 1 by Skottie Young– I previously read this volume years ago. After a re-read, I’ve lowered my rating. I’ve just read way too many different comics and manga and whatnot to not be slightly critical. The art is still great, but it felt like I was struggling to get through this at points, especially after starting volume 2 and having to stop from boredom. It feels repetitive.

Sunshine, Sadness and Other Floridian Effects by Shelby Eileen– This collection was better than Their Body, luckily! It has some stunning imagery, calling up impressions of water and the turning of the tide in tandem with loss coinciding with moments of happiness, and I do recommend it.

Faithless #3/#4 by Brian Azzarello– Starting to get bored with this series. There’s only so much shocking stuff and nudity without any kind of explanation for it before you grow tired. I’ll carry on reading for a few issues; I’m just ready to drop it if nothing much keeps happening.

Pochamani Volume 1-5 by Kaname Hirama– Ohhh this was such a great series! It’s out of print so I had to read it online, and only the first five volumes are actually translated, which was so disappointing but I still recommend this series. It’s got the first fat main character I’ve seen in a manga series, and has so much conversation surrounding body shaming and positivity and the constant grappling with self-hate when you have a fat body. It means a lot to me, and seeing a romance where a fat girl is adored by her boyfriend is so wholesome.

The Diary of a Bookseller by Shaun Bythell– I literally started this last year and it took me that whole period of time to read 140 pages, and then in the space of a week I read the last 150. There’s definitely a sense of elitism and anti-genre fiction (especially what is typically branded as targeted towards women) which aggravated me, but the general humour was great and there was an interesting insight into the running of independent bookshops.

The Luminous Dead by Caitlin Starling– I feel like I’ve gone OFF about this book on here in August, but this book deserves it. It’s an intense psychological sci-fi horror where main character, Gyre, goes on a caving mission that ends up being more than it first appears. I love the relationship that develops between Gyre and Em, and I highly recommend the audiobook!

My Life with Bob by Pamela Paul– I have a whole review on my Goodreads that I feel summarises my issues with this book. I enjoyed this, but same with Shaun Bythell’s book, there’s a definite sense of elitism in some ways. I think Pamela Paul was willing to paint herself negatively in some respects and show the harmful thought processes she could have, and I appreciated that. My review is a lot more elaborate! Sorry!

Pen & Ink by Isaac Fitzgerald and Wendy MacNaughton– This is a fun side-by-side of tattoos with the explanations behind them from the people that have them. The stories are whacky and fun, in some places, but are also sentimental and heartfelt in others, and I like the different thought processes behind getting them and the way everyone still seems to love them.

My Hero Academia Volume 19 by Kohei Horikoshi– SO. GOOD. The real strength of this series lies in how well developed the characters and their relationships are, and this volume especially reaffirms that. Aoyama is so sweet and if he’s the traitor I’ll riot!

TBR JAR PICK FOR SEPTEMBER IS: WILLFUL MACHINES by Tim Floreen! My best friend picked this one out for me, thank you friend!

THINGS I WATCHED

I FINALLY went to the cinema again and watched BTS: Bring the Soul. I loved it.

I re-watched Daddy Day Care (don’t ask, it’s literally the only film I watched on Netflix the whole month and I hate that) and it opens with Ben– Eddie Murphy’s in-movie son– climbing out of bed and putting on the exact same Spongebob slippers my sister and I had when we were younger and it was amazing. I’ve never felt so nostalgic over something so unintentional in a film.

Not a watch, but a listen: the Teenage Scream podcast hosted by Kirsty Logan and Heather Parry, where they read and breakdown classic Point Horror novels from the 90s.

As always, I watched random stuff on deep dives on YouTube. This included: An Aesthetic History of The 1975, fat people don’t belong in magazines (it’s not what it sounds like), Being Lowborn w/ Kerry Hudson (an author interview! yes!), and I guess I’ll recommend the latest paperbackdreams video because I love Kat’s channel!

POSTS

University: Second Year Breakdown

A Bookshelf Tour: Part 1

REVIEW: These Witches Don’t Burn

Shakespeare Plays as Taylor Swift Songs

REVIEW: The Luminous Dead

Top Ten Tuesday: Read Books I Wish I Owned!

A Bookshelf Tour: Part 2

If you liked this post, consider buying me a coffee? Ko-Fi.

Goodreads|Twitter|Instagram|Letterboxd

August Wrap Up Hallo! So let's start this post by referencing the major creative crisis I went through this month, stemming from a blogging rut I found myself in beginning in July.

#august #books #movies #reading wrap up #tv shows #wrap up

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gethealthy18-blog · 6 years ago

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I Filter My Photos… So What?

New Post has been published on http://healingawerness.com/getting-healthy/getting-healthy-women/i-filter-my-photos-so-what/

I Filter My Photos… So What?

Saumya Gaur January 2, 2019

So, like many of you, who are reading this, I too am guilty of using filters on the photos that I post on the social media. But wait a minute, what am I apologizing for? This article is not going to be an apology for the amazing pictures of mine which are an outcome of the filters on Instagram. I would rather use this article to explain why I use them and how there is no harm in it.

Off late, we have heard a lot of criticism about the way superstars, glamazons, and other blessed pretty people use these filters to manipulate the way they look on screen. The moment you type the term “Instagram filters” on your search bar, you get two types of results — one, the different ways to employ the filters to enhance your images. The other being the myriad blog posts that denounce the way these filters indulge in visual trickery to make us believe that these Instagram influencers and fashionistas have all descended on earth straight from the garden of Eden.

Well, I am no influencer and more often than not, my OOTD is the random articles of clothing that I can get my hands on, the first thing in the morning. My followers on any of the social media sites can be counted on fingers, and that doesn’t stop me from using these filters. And I don’t see going back on this any time in the foreseeable future. Here’s why I am not ashamed to use filters on my photos and you shouldn’t be too!

1. They Make My Pictures A Bit Whimsical

Shutterstock

Be it adding a little sparkle to my images with the “Purple Glitter” filter or inducing the 90s effect by using the “VCR” filter. These filters allow me to add a quirky twist to my photos. They uplift the everyday mundane and the banal by endowing it with a magical quality. What better way to get through a particularly boring work day than using these filters to trick you into thinking that you’re in a far away fairyland? And you can’t even say I am deceiving people because do you really think I have a glittery halo around my head or that I was born with golden eyelids?

It’s just an attempt to fill my boring, devoid-of-magic life with some flair, so don’t come at me.

2. They Allow Me To Control My Appearance

Shutterstock

We all have good hair days, bad hair days, a-zit-as-large-as-the-moon days, so on, and so forth. And getting a compliment on such days can work wonders for your self-esteem. So if using a filter allows me to work on that tiny blemish which is marring an otherwise perfect day, why shouldn’t I?

The Internet is full of trolls who are ready to scrutinize every tiny flaw that you have and amplify it a thousand times. Why would anyone make themselves vulnerable to that? Using filters allows me to erase these tiny flaws and gives me the power to control how I appear on the cyberspace. Meanwhile, I can work on those flaws in peace. As our saint Taylor Swift said, shake it off!

3. I Use It To Create My Own Art

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Photography, like any other medium such as writing or painting, has its own language and lexicon. Like all art, even photography is twice removed from reality. It makes no claim to give you the real thing. And filters are just a tool that I employ to further enhance my pictures and give them a unique twist. Using these filters helps me focus on particular details and allows me to create my own pieces of art. And for all those who say it promotes body dysmorphia, I know I don’t have long eyelashes like a camel’s and the ones who are looking at my photos are aware of that fact as well.

4. It Boosts My Self-Esteem

Shutterstock

We are all aware of the fact that there is no such thing as a perfect face or a perfect body, yet all of us wish to achieve that perfection. I can’t talk about everybody else, but I have had a love-hate relationship with my body. Thinking that my nose is too big or wanting to alter the shape of my lips is something that I have done a lot.

These filters allow me to do just that without having to resort to dangerous medical procedures. It’s a simple wish-fulfillment mechanism. And there’s no shame in indulging in a little self-care, is there? So if using these filters allows me to feel good about myself a little, why shouldn’t I use them?

Just to be clear, I am not here for dangerous trends like thigh gap nor am I a paid advertiser of Instagram or Photoshop. I am just saying that there is no harm in using them as long as you do it self-consciously.

Do you filter your photos as well? Let us know your views about them in the comments section.

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