#i had like a month solid of both early morning appointments and late evening classes

[gothwizardmagic]

the inherent deliciousness of not having to set an alarm

[girl-with-cat-eyes]

Sweeter Than Ice Cream

Summary: Virgil is feeling good about his body for once. Leave it to assholes to come along and ruin the feeling. Luckily his boyfriend is there to cheer him up.

Contains Thvi, mentioned Demus, mentioned Logicality, mentioned Rosleepmile, chubby trans Virgil, and mentions of bullying.

A/N: Alright the birthday fic is going up a bit late but who cares cause it's adorable. Really I just wanted something ridiculously sweet and comforting so here we are. And if people like it I can totally write more for this verse cause I already have tons of ideas.

~

"Hello handsome."

Virgil was getting his text books out of his locker when he felt a familiar pair of arms slide around his waist, a hand stopping to squeeze his round bottom before continuing on it's way. He smiled and turned around to greet their owner, giving his boyfriend a smile before he spoke. 

"Good morning to you too, beautiful." He wrapped his arms around Thomas' neck and him a kiss. "Glad you're here today, I was worried about you yesterday." 

Thomas gave an apologetic smile and pecked his nose before speaking. "I'm sorry Virge. I tried to text you, but I had a dentist's appointment yesterday." He flashed his freshly cleaned teeth in an exaggerated grin. "How are you today?" 

"Well let's see:", Virgil began to list off.", today is a friday, dad offered to make my lunch today which meant I got an extra half hour of sleep, I have leftover mac and cheese for lunch, today is a Friday, I'm having a sleepover with my amazing boyfriend tonight, and said boyfriend is holding me right now. So I'd say it's about as good as it gets. Not to mention I'm feeling more body confident than I have in months. How about you?"

Thomas smiled. "As perfect as possible. Especially now that I have you in my arms." He squeezed Virgil's sides gently. "And I'm glad you're feeling confident right now. You deserve to.", Thomas smiled at his boyfriend and took note of his clothing choice for today., "And you look great in what you're wearing, sweetheart. I mean you always look great, but you look adorable right now. I don't think I've seen you in something pastel since you got this."

Virgil blushed at the mention of his unusual outfit choice. While normally he wore baggy and dark clothes, not only to match his emo personality but to help deal with his insecurities about his weight and dysphoria, but today he'd felt confident and comfortable in his body and went with a different choice. He wore light purple overall shorts and a cute black top underneath along with knee high socks and purple chuck taylors. He'd finished off the look with a black heart choker and his usual makeup. He'd been excited to see Thomas' and his friends' reactions to him something so different from his usual style. 

"I liked how it looked on me and I wanted to wear it. Besides I thought it would be the perfect outfit for our sleepover tonight."  Virgil reluctantly pulled away from the hug to finish grabbing his textbooks, "I'm glad you like it. I was hoping you would." 

He felt arms wrap around him again and warm breath tickle his neck as Thomas leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "Well I like you in anything. Or nothing. Especially in nothing at all." He pressed a kiss behind Virgil's ear. 

Virgil held back a groan before shutting his locker and turning around. "You can't just say that when we have 10 minutes til class." 

"Fine. I'll tell you tonight while your parents are out. For now I'll ask you about the homework from yesterday." The pair made their way down the hallway to their first class. 

~

If Thomas had to pick a favorite part of school days it would have to be lunch. Not only because it served as a break between classes or because it was when he could finally eat, but because he shared a lunch period with his boyfriend. He got a solid half hour everyday to just sit with Virgil and spend time together. It was nice. 

Of course it would be nice if he hadn't drank an entire water bottle during his last period and was now rushing to the bathroom. He'd gotten lucky that the one closest to the cafeteria was empty and he didn't have to search for one. 

At least, he thought it was empty. Until he heard a sob coming from one of the stalls behind while he washed his hands. Thomad froze at the sound. He really should be meeting Virgil for lunch. But what if someone was hurt? What if they needed help? Fuck it, he thought, it couldn't hurt to ask if they're ok. 

"Hey?" He called. "Are you ok? Do you need me to get the nurse or something? It's my lunch period so I have the time." 

He heard a gasp and some movement before a familiar voice spoke. "Thomas?" 

Virgil. Shit. What could have happened in the time that they had been apart? Thomas rushed over to the stall and opened it to see his boyfriend curled up in a corner looking at him. His hurt beat painfully when he saw his black eye and bloody nose that Virgil was pressing toilet paper to. He felt a hot rush of anger when he saw that half of his face appeared to be covered in what looked like cake. 

Thomas grimaced and got up to wet some paper towels before setting to work with cleaning Virgil's face. Afterwards he pressed some more toilet paper to his bloody nose and sighed. "What happened?" 

Virgil kept his eyes down. "The usual shit. I went to use the bathroom and was ambushed. They said that they felt uncomfortable with me using the same bathrooms as them. That I'd probably try to force them to be gay. That freaks like me shouldn't be allowed in the school period. After that they beat the shit out of me." Virgil gestured to his bruised face. "And then they…. They brought a piece of cake with them. Said a whale like me would probably love it. And they shoved it in my face."

Thomas felt molten hot anger wash through him but pushed it aside for now. Virgil needed him. He stood up and pulled his boyfriend up with him. "Come on, Stormcloud.

"Where are we going?"

"Well first we're going to stop by Holy Cow's and get sundaes because you deserve something as sweet as you are. Then we're going to go to your place and call your dads to tell them what happened. And then we can cuddle and begin our sleepover early." 

Virgil raised an eyebrow at him. "And what about class? You've already missed yesterday." 

Thomas shrugged and held Virgil's hand as they left the bathroom. "I'll tell your uncle what happened and ask him to get our homework for us." Thomas knew that Virgil's uncle, the school drama teacher, Roman would be fine with it. He'd probably claim that what happened to his nephew was a huge offense and demand to know who did it. 

They signed themselves out for the day and got into Thomas' car. He made sure to send a text to Roman explaining what happened and asking him to get their homework for them. He received an almost immediate response saying of course and that he would be by after school with it and then they could tell him who it was. 

First stop was ice cream. Virgil ended up dozing in the car and Thomas didn't have the heart to wake him so he just went in by himself. Besides it wasn't like he didn't know Virgil's favorite sundae. His boyfriend was a chocolate lover from way back.

He smiled as he entered the shop. Some of his favorite memories were here. Coming here as a kid when he got a good grade, his dads taking him here on his birthday. He even went here with Virgil on their first date. He still remembered how nervous Virgil had been to eat anything around him at the time. It had taken forever to assure V that his weight was fine. It could still be a struggle, with Virgil's confidence fluctuating. But Thomas would never stop showing him how amazing and beautiful he was. 

Thomas shook off those thoughts and gave a wave to Remy, the shop's owner. Thomas looked at the menu vaguely even though him and Virgil always got the same thing. 

"Girl, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in school?" 

Thomas shrugged and gestured out to his car. "Virgil got beat up by some assholes so I'm taking him to get ice cream as a treat." 

 Remy crossed his arms and smirked, "Mmmhmmm. So where is my favorite customer?" 

Thomas gave a pretend shocked gasp, "I've been coming here as long as Virgil has." 

"Like I said he's my favorite customer.", Remy grabbed two styrofoam bowls, "The usual for both of you?" 

Thomas snorted and nodded, "Yep. He fell asleep in the car and I didn't want to wake him. So just me today.", Remy nodded and began making Thomas' birthday cake sundae and Virgil's chocolate brownie s'more sundae. 

"Well because this is comfort ice cream I'm giving you each an extra scoop. And it's on the house." Thomas went to object but Remy cut him off, "Hun, last time you were here you tipped twenty bucks. And the time before that you tipped ten. You've got some free ice cream points saved up. Enjoy it." 

Thomas sighed and put his wallet away before smiling, "Thank you. I figured this would be a good way to cheer him up. Worst part was he was feeling confident today too. I was so excited for him." 

Remy grimaced and went to roast two marshmallows for the ice cream in question, "That's how life is sometimes. You're feeling great and it kicks you where it hurts. But you just gotta be there for him now and hope his confidence stays up. And if not, be a confidence booster.", He finished off the sundaes with some hot fudge and caramel on Virgil's and rainbow sprinkles and cake crumbles on Thomas', topping both with whipped cream. 

Thomas nodded and took the ice cream gratefully, "Thank you. I'm sure Roman will tell you and Emile all the details later tonight.", With that he went back to the car and drove to Virgil's house. 

~ 

Virgil awoke to Thomas kissing his cheek and saying that they had to get out of the car. He blinked groggily before wincing at the feeling of his bruised eye and got up slowly., "Did you message my parents?", He asked through a yawn. 

Thomas nodded and picked up the ice cream containers before answering, "Yep. Remus is working late tonight at the hospital but Janus should be home at 5 and he said he'd get take out. And he wanted to talk about what happened." 

Virgil nodded and got out his key before letting them both in. He went to go to the kitchen but was stopped by Thomas who guided him to the living room. 

"What are you doing?" 

Virgil gestured to his eye., "I'm going to get some ice and painkillers." 

Thomas nodded and got up. "I'll do that. You sit and relax.", He was handed a cold styrofoam bowl. "Here's your sundae. I got your usual." Virgil smiled and Thomas headed into the kitchen. 

Virgil stared at the sundae on his lap hesitantly. Sure, it sounded great after the day he had, but did he really need it? He was fat enough as is without it. He could still hear those asshole's jeers in the restroom, calling him a whale and laughing when he fell. 

Before he could do anything though, Thomas came back and was handing him a water bottle and some painkillers and pressing some ice to his eye. Virgil gladly took several large drinks of water and went back to looking at the ice cream nervously. 

"Hey." Virgil looked at Thomas to see him giving him a concerned look.  "Whatever those assholes said about you… None of it is true. You're amazing and beautiful and your weight is fine. You deserve some ice cream after the day you've had."

Virgil winced internally. Dammit. He hadn't meant for Thomas to know how he was feeling. But that's just how Thomas was sometimes. He could take one look at Virgil and was able to figure out exactly what was bothering him and made it his mission to make him feel better. "It's just… Sometimes I think I would get so much of the bullying if I was thinner, y'know. And maybe I deserve it, cause I could probably do more to try to lose the weight. Like I could go on another diet-" 

"Like when you ended up passing out in gym class because you were malnourished?" Thomas interrupted him. Before Virgil could say anything else Thomas was pulling him onto his lap. He tried to do his best to not put any weight on him but Thomas wasn't having it. Virgil found himself tucked snugly in his boyfriends arms. "Babe you eat healthy and are decently active. And your doctor has said you're healthy even with your weight. I know firsthand that it can be hard to love yourself, but please… Never listen to those assholes. And if you're feeling insecure come to me. I'll always be willing to reassure you." 

Virgil was blushing and Thomas kissed each of his full, red cheeks. "Now I think we have some well earned ice cream and feel good movies waiting for us." Virgil nodded and snorted as Thomas put on Hairspray. 

He leaned up to kiss his boyfriend and took a bite of ice cream, moaning at the taste. "I love you." 

Thomas laughed and kissed Virgil back before grabbing his sundae as well.  "I can't tell if you're talking to me of the ice cream but I love you too." 

Virgil smiled and hummed along to the opening number and took another bite before speaking. "Both. I love ice cream because it's delicious and I love you because you're easily one of the best things to ever happen to me."

Thomas smiled and took a bite of ice cream and kissing him. Virgil could taste frosting and bits of vanilla cupcake on his lips. By the time they pulled away they were both breathing heavily. Virgil pressed several quick kisses on Thomas' face. And smiled. "I love you. So much." 

Thomas only responded by kissing him again with just as much intensity as before. Virgil smiled when Thomas finally pulled away and whispered. "I love you. I… I was going to give this you tonight, I figured that it would be the perfect time. And it still is of course I wanted you to be happier when I did it but… Will you go steady with me?" He held out a silver ring with a purple heart shaped gem. 

Virgil looked at him with a mixture of shock and happiness. "Really?" 

Thomas rubbed the back of his neck and gave an anxious smile. "Yeah. I know it's old fashioned but I thought it would be cute. I was talking to my grandpa about it and he said that going steady was supposed to be a promise that you wanted to spend forever together even if you weren't married yet. Of course back then people got married right out of high school. But I thought that that meaning was perfect for us. I want to spend forever with you, and obviously neither of us are ready for marriage." 

Virgil smiled and nodded rapidly at his boyfriend. "Of course. I'd love to go steady with you." Thomas put the ring on his finger and kissed his hand. "It's beautiful."

Thomas smiled. "I got it down at my cousin's shop. I thought it was perfect for you. And now that I'm seeing it I'm happy to report that I was right." 

Virgil smiled and made a mental note to go see Toby this weekend and pick out an equally beautiful ring for Thomas. For now however, he had a boyfriend to snuggle and movies to watch. He pulled Thomas closer and pressed several kisses before burrowing his face in his neck. 

By the time Janus, Roman, and Remus all burst in at once, the pair were asleep, the credits to the movie rolling unnoticed.

~

Tagging:

@forever-forgotten-angel, @anxiety-ismy-name

[chokememrstark]

I couldn't help but think of Tony getting a secretary. He has a normal one, obviously, but that secretary had to leave unexpectedly so he had to get a quick replacement, and he's sent a fresh-faced, eager boy named Peter who just wants to do so well on his first job...

This… escalated a bit. Not saying I’m sorry, but I enjoyed this a lot and I hope you don’t mind that this is a bit late!

Words: ~4,6k

[Read on AO3]

Tony Stark relies on his secretary to run his company, it’s always been this way and they have become a great team over the years they worked together. However, when she comes to him one day to tell him she’s pregnant, Tony already sees all his success and fortune disappear. She keeps working for several months, but it’s clear that Tony has to find someone to replace her and no matter how many interviews he has, no one is good enough. Everyone coming by is either not committed enough or not capable of the tasks necessary.

On her last day before maternity leave, Tony finally gives in and comes to her, sighing. “I can’t find anyone, May,” he says, clearly frustrated to no end by the lack of capacity he had to deal with for weeks. “This company will go down without you.”

“I don’t think so, Tony,” May says with a smile, looking up at him. “There’s someone I know would be perfect for this position, but I didn’t want to ask you earlier because he’s family.”

“May, at this point I’d make a deal with the Devil to find someone!” Tony tells her, everything as serious as he looks. “If you tell me he’s good enough, tell him to come in tomorrow. I need someone to take care of these things, otherwise I’ll get nothing done anymore.”

“I will talk to him, I’m sure he’s going to be very excited.”

“Good,” Tony sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Finally some good news. And you take care of that little rascal, alright? Give me a call sometime so I know how you’re doing.”

“Of course, Tony,” May laughs happily. “I’ll need a babysitter eventually, after all.”

“Oh, we will have to talk about that part again,” Tony laughs himself, utterly relieved and even a little hopeful that things might turn out good after all. May knows what he needs and if she says she has someone who’s capable, he believes her.

—–

When Tony walks into his office the next morning, he’s a bit taken aback by the fact that there is a pile of papers on his desk that is ready to sign and a steaming mug of coffee next to it. He raises a brow and walks back into his secretary’s office, but it’s empty. Given the time - it’s shortly after 7 - he can’t imagine May’s replacement already working, so he can’t explain the coffee. Eventually though, he shrugs, accepting it for the moment until he knows what’s going on and sits down to go over the papers.

Fifteen minutes later, Tony realized the papers are more than just that. On every single one of them is at least one sticky note, giving him additional information or opinions on whether or not signing them the way they are is a good idea. At first, he is about to dismiss them, but when curiosity gets the better of him and he checks the contracts, he notices that those little additions are extremely helpful and accurate.

“Color me surprised,” Tony huffs when he finishes going through another file, one with a note saying ‘Don’t sign, it’s a trap. They made a deal with Oscorp last week and want to rip SI off’. He decides that he needs to see who is responsible for this and is about to get up, when the door suddenly opens and he turns his head.

In the door frame stands a boy, no older than 18 or 19, possibly, with an innocent face and another pile of papers in his hands. There’s uncertainty in his eyes and Tony realizes he’s pretty much staring at him in complete shock and quickly tries to collect himself.

“Yes? How can I help you?” he asks, trying to sound friendly and not confused.

“I’m sorry for disturbing you, Mr. Stark,” the boy says, a shy and utterly sweet voice, and walks into the office. “I have a few more contracts for you to look over if you have time. If not, I’ll come back later.”

Tony keeps staring at the boy for another moment before it finally clicks. He must be the one May talked about the day before. Somehow, Tony had expected someone way older, not a literal kid.

“You brought these in earlier?” he asks and points to the papers that are almost finished by now.

“Y-Yes, sir,” the boy immediately says, nodding. “Should I not have? May said you prefer just getting to work and not chat in the morning, that’s why I just put them here before checking on the rest.”

“And you put all those notes in there?”

“I… I did, yes,” the boy admits, swallowing. “I can stop if you don’t need them, I just figured it would make things easier, I’m sorry.”

Tony is actually surprised and lets out a laugh, signing the boy over. “No need to stop, they are very helpful indeed,” he says and nods. He takes the next pile of contracts and puts them onto his desk. “May told me she has someone to cover for her, but I didn’t expect, well… a kid.”

The boy’s cheeks flush slightly and he looks down. “I’m not a kid anymore, sir,” he says quietly. “My aunt said you needed help while she’s on leave and I promised her to take over.”

“You still in school?” Tony asks, raising a brow. The boy looks back up at him, shaking his head.

“I graduated last month, sir,” he tells him. “Business and Economics, top of my class.”

Tony huffs impressed and leans back in his chair, glancing the boy over. “So, you’re May’s nephew?” he asks, earning a nod. “And you think you can do the job as good as her?”

“I do, yes, sir,” the boy agrees. “And I’m Peter, if that makes things easier. Peter Parker.”

“Peter, I see.” Tony’s lips curl into a smirk. “Well then, Peter. So far I’m alright with your work, but I have to ask you something. How do you know all these things? The deal with Oscorp, for example? This is usually very sensitive data no one outside of the company should have.”

Peter blushes even harder at this and looks down at his feet. “I… have a friend who works at Oscorp for an internship,” he admits quietly. “He brought it up while we met a few days ago and I remembered. I didn’t spy or anything, I swear.”

That’s not really what Tony expected, but he can see how uncomfortable the question makes Peter, so he nods and tones it down a bit.

“I have to thank both of you then,” he says appreciative. “You saved me a few millions with this information. And a lot of embarrassment.”

Peter’s head snaps up again and Tony can practically hear the boy’s heart drop and the relief that comes with it.

“The other notes were very helpful too, so if you want to keep them up, feel free to.”

“T-Thank you, sir!” Peter says proudly and smiles at him. “I’ll work hard, I promised May to do my best and I will.”

“I’m sure of that,” Tony smiles and waves his hand, signaling Peter that he’s free to leave.

Once the boy is gone and Tony is alone again, he leans back and huffs. This is definitely a turn of events he didn’t expect, but Tony figures giving the boy a chance won’t hurt. So far he did a great job and he’s obviously very eager and motivated. And if he’s honest, maybe having a secretary this cute and young will be practical in the future.

—–

Tony quickly realizes that Peter is not only motivated, he is completely committed to his job. he shows up as early as 6am and stays until Tony leaves, sometimes even longer, and sometimes Tony wonders if the boy even sleeps or eats at all. All the contracts he gets are prepared and he soon goes to simply read Peter’s notes to decide whether or not signing them is a good idea. The boy is always right, it becomes a habit so fast he barely notices it.

Peter also takes care of his calls and of scheduling his appointments, which turns out to give Tony a lot more free time than he is used to. Apparently, Peter is able to deal with certain things by himself and give satisfying answers without the need to bother Tony over them and he always makes sure his boss has several hours between appointments to collect himself and calm down. There’s also always fresh coffee and Peter even goes to get Tony breakfast every day, insisting that he needs to eat something solid in the morning.

It’s strange how easily Tony accepts this new way of working and even stops complaining about the breakfast after a week. Peter seems to know what he likes to eat and the coffee is always on point, so why complain? Once a day, he calls the boy into his office to discuss contracts with him and get an update on everything Peter takes care of and the more he listens to him, the more he can see just how good the boy really is. May truly kept her promise, he can’t deny it.

A month passes before Peter suddenly knocks on Tony’s doow, who just ended a call with one of his competitors. The boy looks disappointed and sad and it actually makes Tony’s heart ache seeing him like that.

“What’s wrong, Pete?” he asks as the boy comes closer. “Did something happen?”

“There might be a problem, sir,” Peter says when he sits down, without looking up at Tony. “My friend told me he had an appointment with Osbourne yesterday and I know he wasn’t supposed to tell me, but he did anyway. They are trying to make a deal with Odinson Incorporated…”

Tony’s eyes widen at that. Odinson Incorporated is one of the big companies both Stark Industries and Oscorp are trying to get on board with for years already and neither of them have succeeded so far. Making this deal is going to be huge, it’s like hitting the jackpot.

“How is he trying to do that?” Tony asks, leaning forward. “Did he tell you?”

Peter nods and bites his lip. “Apparently they offer him very good conditions, something Odinson can’t pass on.” He finally looks up and when he notices the worry on Tony’s face, he gulps. “I played with some numbers as soon as I had the chance and we could technically give them a better deal. We’d have to make a few cuts, but it would be worth it in the long run.”

“What kind of cuts are we talking about here?”

“Mostly customer service, really,” Peter says and sighs. “Oscorp isn’t going to give them any, but if we offer that to them, maybe they reconsider. The problem is we’d have to schedule an appointment with the brothers to talk this through and they are… rather difficult sometimes.”

“Yeah, I’ve been trying to get them to meet with me for months already,” Tony sighs audibly. “It’s near impossible.”

There’s a moment of silence before Peter speaks again and when he does, he sounds hesitant. “If you don’t mind… I could try getting one?”

“You think you’ll be more successful than I’ve been?” Tony asks, raising a brow. “Why that?”

“I don’t know, I just thought I could try,” Peter shrugs, cheeks slightly pink. “People usually react positive to me and so far I managed to schedule appointments with everyone, right?”

Tony huffs, but Peter isn’t wrong. He even managed to get an appointment with several difficult people in the past month and his idea isn’t the worst, even if it means a bit of restructuring. Maybe Peter can actually get somewhere with this and it won’t really hurt trying. The worst he can get is a no and that Odinson makes a deal with Oscorp.

“Alright, you got me,” Tony finally sighs and nods. “Try your luck with them.”

Peter beams at Tony and nods, immediately grabbing the phone and typing in a number. Tony wonders for a moment if he actually remembered the whole thing and is about to ask, but Peter puts a finger to his lips when it starts ringing, so he stays quiet. After that, he watches and listens curiously.

“Hello? Yes, my name is Parker, I’m calling on behalf of Stark Industries.” - “Yes, ma’am, that’s right. I’m Mr. Stark’s secretary, I’m calling about an appointment to discuss a possible deal.” - “Oh no, that’s very unfortunate… are you sure there is nothing you can do?” - “I know they are very busy, but it won’t be a long appointment, maybe half an hour at most. It would really help me if you could find something, ma’am.” - “What? Yes, of course, I’ll wait.”

He looks at Tony and winks at him before turning his attention back to the phone.

“I’m still here, yes.” - “Really? Nothing for the whole month?” Peter asks and his voice suddenly changes. It stops sounding friendly and confident and instead turns sad and disappointed. “That’s bad,” he sighs quietly. “I hoped there would be a chance…” - “Yes, I know they are very busy, but I guess they don’t want a good deal then.”

Tony squints his eyes when he notices a cheeky grin spread on Peter’s lips, a drastic contrast to the way he speaks. He didn’t know the boy was such a good actor before.

“Yes, ma’am, Mr. Stark asked me to call again because he wants to give Odinson Incorporated a better deal, but since they are so busy, maybe they -” - “Of course, yes. It’s definitely worth their time to at least consider.” - “Really? Next week?”

Tony’s eyes wide and he blatantly stares at Peter.

“That’s perfect, thank you! Yes, I will inform Mr. Stark right away.” - “Next Wednesday, 11am? Yes, we will be there. Antonio’s, yes, I got that. Thank you very much, you were a huge help.”

Tony keeps staring at Peter after he hangs up, completely dumbfounded. Did this kid just score an appointment with the Odinson brothers? Something Tony and May have tried to do for months? This can’t be, it’s impossible!

“Did you just do what I think you did?” he finally asks, simply because he has to ask something. Peter smiles brightly at him.

“I guess so?” he chuckles and takes a piece of paper from the table to write down the appointment. “She said they have a tight schedule, but they can squeeze half an hour in next Wednesday for lunch. I think that’s better than nothing, right?”

“I could kiss you right now, kid,” Tony says and lets out a surprisingly honest laugh. “If this turns out with SI stealing the deal, you’re in for a huge raise, I promise.”

Peter’s cheeks flush hard at this and he looks down at his hands. “Y-You don’t have to, really,” he mumbles. “I just want to do a good job…”

“And you’re doing just that,” Tony assures him, leaning over to squeeze the boy’s shoulder. “If you have time, I want you to come with me to that appointment, alright? I’m sure your sweet charm won’t hurt when facing the brothers. I can wrap people around my fingers, but I have a feeling you’re much better at that than I am.”

“Of course, yes,” Peter says quickly and nods. “I’ll happily come with you.”

Tony smiles, for the first time since Peter walked in with this horribly sad face feeling a bit of hope. They are so much further than they have been all this time already, he counts that as a success in itself. And he knows Peter will do his best during this appointment.

The following days, Peter mostly spends with Tony to go over the numbers and come up with a plan to provide the custom service he talked about without draining all of SI’s resources. Once Wednesday morning rolls around, they have a solid plan and Peter made sure to wear his best suit to look as presentable as possible. It’s the first time he attends an appointment with Tony and he’s obviously nervous, but Tony tries to calm him down the best he can.

“If we don’t succeed, nothing is lost that we already have, alright?” he smiles at him as they drive into the restaurant parking lot. “That we even have this opportunity is all because of your great idea and convincing skills, so don’t stress yourself too much. Just be yourself and we’ll see what happens.”

Peter nods, still nervous but at least a bit relieved that Tony is no demanding, and they exit the car to walk into the restaurant. A waiter immediately guides them to a separé that has been reserved for them and it doesn’t take five minutes of them sitting before he comes back, accompanied by two men.

“Thor Odinson, glad to finally have the chance to meet you in person,” Tony says dutifully, standing up and taking one of the men’s hand to shake it. He’s tall and broad, long blond hair he wear in a ponytail and a face that looks both friendly and intimidating just the same. Peter stands up himself and takes the man’s hand after Tony, who already shakes his brother’s - pr at least Peter assumes it’s his brother, given he never actually saw them and they don’t look alike at all. The other is just as tall, but more slender with long, black hair, pale skin and piercing green eyes.

“I’m sorry we had to schedule this appointment for lunch, but things are very busy these days,” Thor says and nods as he as they both sit down. “I don’t think you’ve met my brother Loki yet?”

Tony shakes his head, but smiles at the other. “It’s an honor, really,” he says. “And I don’t mind a lunch appointment at all. At least we won’t leave hungry afterwards, right?”

Peter is surprised when he sees Thor laugh at that and can’t hold a chuckle himself, which he tries to hide behind his hand. Shortly after, the waiter takes their order and then leaves them alone again. Two minutes later they have their drinks and Peter assumes it’s because of the amount of money sitting at the table that the service is so fast.

“I have to admit, I’m wary about this,” Thor says eventually, looking at Tony. “I have a very decent offer that I am tempted to take and unless yours is much better, I won’t bail on my other partner.”

Tony nods, taking his glass and taking a sip from his Cognac. “Of course, I would not ask you to take on a worse offer, but I believe we have come up with something you might find interesting.”

Peter watches Thor and Tony for a while, before turning his attention to Loki, surprised to see him almost disinterested in the whole conversation that is going on. He wonders if Loki is just here to look good - which he does, there’s no denying that - but then the man suddenly looks up, smirking at him.

“You look like a smart boy,” Loki says, trailing a finger over the edge of his glass. “Did you come up with this idea?”

Peter blinks surprised, clearly not expecting Loki to actually listen to the other two.

“I- I did, yes,” he admits, nodding. “I figured adding a custom service option would be helpful and take work off of your company if it’s provided by SI.”

“Tell me about it,” Loki huffs and rolls his eyes before taking a sip. “I’m the one who has to deal with these things so far and let me assure you, people are fucking dumb.”

“Loki!” Thor suddenly interrupts them, having both his brother and Peter spin around and look at him. “Watch your language, please.”

“Yes, brother,” Loki says and nods, but as soon as he looks back at Peter he makes a mocking gesture with his hand and rolls his eyes again. “Anyway, I wouldn’t mind having this part taken away from us.”

Peter chuckles at that and nods. It’s kind of funny how Loki is so obviously bored by the whole topic that he rather talks to him than be involved in his brother’s and Tony’s conversation.

“With our offer you won’t have to bother with it anymore,” Peter says with a smile and takes a sip from his coke too. “We are able to establish a new branch of SI that solely focuses on your company’s customer service. It might require someone from your company to work with us, but it doesn’t have to be you.”

“You’re throwing me a golden bone here,” Loki laughs amused. “Anything to not talk to annoying customers anymore and get yelled at. And you came up with that by yourself?”

“No, we… we came up with it together,” Peter says quickly, glancing over at Tony, who is just explaining the same thing just more complicated. “I had the initial idea, but we worked the solution out together.”

Loki suddenly smirks when he notices Peter’s look at Tony and nudges the boy’s leg with his foot under the table. “You’re blushing pretty hard,” he says quietly.

“I-I’m not blushing!” Peter immediately says and turns back to Loki, his cheeks a deep pink.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell,” Loki grins and winks at him mischievously. “You’ll get a yes for this deal, no need to panic. I wouldn’t want to work with Oscorp if my life depended on it anyway.”

“W-What?” Peter is so confused, he can just stare at Loki for a full minute.

“Have you ever met Osbourne?” Loki asks and huffs. “This guy is disgusting and rude, I don’t like him at all. I was ready to punch him in the face when we met with him, but Thor told me to be nice.”

Peter can’t believe what he hears, but his heart jumps at Loki’s words. “But I’m sure he offered you a great deal, or not?” he asks surprised. “I mean, your brother seems to consider taking it after all?”

“Yeah, it’s a good deal, but he won’t take it if I ask him not to,” Loki shrugs. “He just offers us lots of money, basically. I’d rather get rid of those dumb customers though.”

Their conversation is interrupted when the waiter brings their food and for a few minutes, they stay silent as they start to eat. Peter observes the others carefully and notices both Thor and Tony seem to be a bit more relaxed than when they arrived and it gives him a bit of hope. He doesn’t believe Loki has that much influence over his brother to do what he wants to seal this deal - it just seems too good to be true - but the whole atmosphere changed somehow and that puts him in a kind of positive mood.

“You know, Stark,” Thor eventually says, making Peter’s head almost fly up. “I see the potential of your deal, but there’s a lot less we gain from it, apart from the taking away of our customer service.”

“Well, it’s more than just that,” Peter says before Tony can reply and Thor looks at him with a raised brow. Peter swallows and shrugs. “Without customer service you won’t have to pay employees dealing with it anymore. All we’d need is one person to contact in case of emergencies, that’s it. So, you’ll save on this department and the deal still grants you authority in the last instance to put your veto on decisions you don’t agree with. It might look like it will gain you less at first glance, but within half a year you saved enough to make up for that and after that, it’s simply a win-win situation for your company.”

Both Thor and Tony look at Peter, Thor surprised and Tony with what almost looks like pride on his face, but Peter manages to keep a straight face.

“It’s about seeing the long-term profits in this and, without wanting to be demeaning or talking anyone down, but certain other companies are known to screw their partners over and I doubt you want to fall into the pit of their victims too.”

“He’s not wrong, you know,” Loki says, looking at Thor and shrugging. “Osbourne only recently fucked over a company almost as big as ours, just to make a few bucks.”

Thor huffs and glares at Loki for a moment, then at Peter and, finally, at Tony again.

“In case you’re worrying, we don’t plan to screw you over,” Tony says with an awkward smirk. “But to be honest, I would hate to see you screwed over by someone else. Even if we take the profit for SI out of the equation, you’ve worked hard to build up your company and to get where you are, choosing the wrong partner now could easily destroy everything you achieved.”

“And you can guarantee me that SI isn’t that partner?” Thor asks sternly, earning a nod.

“We never screwed any of our partners over and we don’t plan to start with you,” Tony shrugs. “This deal even causes us to lose money in the first months, but it will eventually work out for both of us, which I think is the favorable option.”

Peter can’t help but smile when he notices the way Thor’s expression changes and when he looks back at Loki, he sees the other with a victorious grin on his face. This deal is under the covers, so much is clear. Thor won’t want to risk losing money or the reputation he built up and with their deal, he will keep both. Peter couldn’t be happier.

The rest of their lunch goes by rather smoothly and by the end of it, Thor agrees to call Tony the next day to set up a contract. Peter couldn’t have been happier with the outcome. Before leaving, Loki hands Peter a note with his number on it, in case he ever wants to talk again, and the boy can barely believe his luck when they finally leave the restaurant and go back to the car. Once there, however, Tony doesn’t start it and he gets nervous again.

“Is something wrong?” Peter asks, curiously looking at Tony.´The man just holds the wheel and stares through the front window, not answering for a whole minute.

“What the hell just happened?” he finally asks, turning his head slowly.

“We scored the deal, I think?” Peter says with a smirk, shrugging. “That’s good, isn’t it?”

Tony looks at him for a moment before suddenly leaning over and grabbing Peter’s face, pressing a kiss onto his lips. Peter’s eyes pretty much snap open and he stares at Tony in complete shock, not having even the slightest idea about how to react. When Tony eventually pulls back, Peter’s cheeks are a dark shade of pink and his heart beats so fast he can feel it in his throat.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Tony immediately says, swallowing hard. “I… think I forgot myself.”

“No, I… I’m good,” Peter mumbles and turns his head to face the front of the car. “I think we should leave… we still have work to do.”

“Right,” Tony gulps and finally starts the car to drive off.

During their ride back, Tony almost desperately focuses on the street, but Peter keeps glancing over at him. His stomach still feels funny after this kiss, it was just too good and surprising to not affect him, but he doesn’t say anything. It only took Loki a few minutes to obviously notice the crush he has on Tony, but he doesn’t want to ruin the position he’s in by mentioning it directly.

Still, with the contract basically in their pockets and the kiss Tony couldn’t stop himself from, Peter is basically floating on cloud nine. It’s absolutely perfect and even if he just stays the man’s secretary from now on, he couldn’t be happier.

[forumofkuka]

Emory University: First Week!

As my second full day of classes is coming to a close, I’ve decided to reflect back on my first week here in Atlanta, Georgia. Although I didn’t move in until Saturday, August 25th, my father and I flew down Thursday morning. When my final days in Connecticut were approaching, I’ll be honest, I definitely didn’t feel super prepared or knowledgeable about what I was getting myself into. After all, I didn’t start packing until maybe three days before, and I was even still doing that 3 hours before my flight was scheduled to take off. Moreover, I still had to make a ton of purchases in Atlanta for my dorm, like school supplies and bathroom essentials. 

Being that I wouldn’t be returning home until late November, I made a point in my last week to spend more time at home and with family. Although I facetimed friends during those days, I visited my paternal grandparents and also spent time with my sisters (i.e. Making a sisters-only trip up to Agawam, Massachusetts, to spend the afternoon at Six Flags). Saying goodbye to certain relatives was more emotional than I had imagined. Maybe it was my heightened hormones from my period or just suppressed anxieties about picking up my life and moving 1000 miles away, a surge of tears definitely came on when I was saying goodbye to my grandparents the day before my flight. I couldn’t stop them during the drive home either, even though I was trying to not be hysterical in front of my youngest sister who was in the passenger seat beside me. Alisa, my youngest sister, was someone I had been spending a lot more time with in the last few weeks, whether it be going bowling for an hour, getting our eyebrows done, or even running errands. In my final minutes before departing for the airport, I noticed that she was hanging around me a lot more, and that maybe she was also suppressing some feelings as well. LOL even while thinking back on this, I find myself unable to hold back the tears. Anyway, hugging her goodbye also set me off again, although my dad didn’t comment on it so that made it easier for me to calm down. 

I’ve always dreamt about college, and looked forward to the possibilities that come with higher education and being in a new location/larger institution. It wasn’t until my senior week that I started realizing what kinds of apprehensions I had underneath all the enthusiasm about the future. You know, I went to the same secondary school for 6 years, where some of my closest friendships had been that old as well. Sure, I made new connections every year, and my closeness with friends fluctuated throughout the era, but I always had a solid sense of who was my friend and who was merely an acquaintance. The idea of going into college fresh, with a blank slate, was both something I was excited about but I also realized something I was afraid of. Sitting here, 5 days into the process, I’ve met dozens of super interesting, approachable, and intelligent people. I’ve made various acquaintances, whether they be in my dorm, my orientation group, my classes, or spontaneous encounters I’ve had walking around campus. With that being said, although I have people I can message to eat meals with or sit in a lounge with, I don’t feel comfortable here yet socially. I don’t have a solid group, and I’ve been feeling more FOMO (fear of missing out) than I could’ve ever really felt in high school. I don’t know, in some instances, when I see groups of people going off together, especially when I am acquainted with them, to a party or some off-campus event, I definitely feel a little isolation. I don’t know, I don’t want a college experience where all I do is go to class, study, eat food with people, go to a club meeting, and sleep. I want some archetypal college experiences, whether it be going to parties or even taking advantages of the many events that occur in the metropolitan areas of Atlanta. In instances like this, I think I’m just allowing my uncertainties and vulnerability get the best of me, especially because I probably am just making assumptions about the involvement and acclimation of those around me. We all put up facades, and as someone who constantly tries to break mine by confiding in others and being an open person, I should acknowledge and believe this. I’m sure it’s normal. All of my concerns and insecurities are probably expected and on track with where I should be. I just have to remember not to rush into things, because things are going well - they could be so much worse. Everyone I’ve engaged in conversation with has been kind and I haven’t even gone to an activities fair yet, so I haven’t even finished making the frame of my initial social spheres. 

My two days prior to actual moving in went pretty smoothly. We went shopping a lot, spent way too much money of course, because who knew how many little things you’d actually need in your dorm? My list of supplies continued to grow throughout those 48 hours, as I started remembering the smallest but most essential things that I always had at my disposal when I lived in a family home, rather than a 11′ by 20′ dorm room. We went to some cool eateries in the area, such as Poke Burri, a social media renowned poke stand that makes sushi doughnuts, burritos, bowls, pizza, you name it - although it is located in a more rundown, artistic, hipster neighborhood that is a little unassuming, it was pretty cool and a general area I’d want to revisit again with some friends (neurotic, protective fathers are probably not built for a place like that). We also visited my former Russian teacher, who a few months before my acceptance to Emory, had announced that she was moving to a city that’s just under an hour outside of Atlanta. It was comforting to be able to see her again, and even nicer to know that she’s more than willing to be a source of support for me too. I think I’m going to try and visit her in late September or early October, just because I don’t really have too many familiar faces here.�� In terms of the whole move-in process, the day went pretty smoothly. My scheduled move-in time was 7:00am, so my dad and I woke up at 5:45am to get there on time. We finished unpacking my various suitcases and packages around 1:00pm (I worked slower than I probably should LOL). I met my roommate and her family of course, which went nicely. She and I clicked immediately, we’ve been communicated for about 4 months now, since we had requested each other way back in April. Even though I felt like we’d make great friends, I even started getting apprehensive about how she and I would get along, since it’s always hard to kind of tell how someone is over text and how someone is in person. So far, everything has been pretty easy-going, and both of us have been very willing to share and compromise, which is great :) We are different in various ways, but also alike in others, so I’m happy with how that’s going! Our ability to click quickly was definitely something that reassuringly lifted stress off my shoulders. After unpacking my belongings, we met with our orientation groups, had the Emory Welcome assembly, the traditional Emory Coke Toast (after which my father left), and then another Emory After Dark social event, where students were able to get free food from various local food trucks and mingle. 

So far, all of the social events have proven to be more or less fun, and have resulted in me encountering a wide breadth of interesting and kind people. I’ve yet to meet someone who has been explicitly rude or unapproachable, and it’s just been really cool to be surrounded by so many people who are passionate, driven, and talented. Though, I will say, I’ve never been more exhausted in my life. With our orientation days packed to the brim with Songfest practices, orientation leader meetings, convocation, Emory welcome events, you name it - any free time we do have, usually begins at around 9:00pm, meaning it’s pretty likely that if you want to have control over who you hang out with, you’ll end up going to bed around 12:00am to 1:00am every night. Or, at least I have. So far, my roommate has been pretty easygoing with me coming in late, I think both for her sake and my own, I’m going to have to cut it down, because I went to bed at nearly 2:00am last night (today is 8/31/2018) even, and I woke up at 8:00am (mind you, I was going to wake up at 6:30am to go to the gym). Last night, after Songfest - which is a freshman-dorm singing and dancing competition where each residence hall basically disses the other and competes for best shirt/banner/lyrics/performance - I was thinking about going to The Mansion for their Emory Back to School Event, but it would’ve started at like 10:30pm and gone to 3:00am, and apparently a lot of girls get sexually assaulted there so I’m glad I decided against it. It’s weird, even on the night after move-in day, I saw hoards of girls all dressed up to go off campus to parties - how do people even find out about these kinds of things? I also don’t understand what’s the rush? Like you barely know the people in your own dorm building, let alone already going off to get trashed somewhere else.  It’s strange the severity of FOMO I’ve been feeling here, like it hasn’t been atrocious, but it has been more than at home, and it has been contributing to feelings of depression that I haven’t felt in a long time. Later today, I’m going to call the Psychological & Mental Health Services Office to try and schedule and appointment, because it hasn’t even been a week since move in, and I’m already feeling myself shut down and want to isolate myself. It really hit me that I may need to get counseling when I found myself having difficulty holding back tears while I was in the midst of one of the most high-spirited, school events of my four years here - why would anyone be sad while having school spirit and being around people who are super energetic and enthusiastic? So, it felt like something was wrong.  

Nonetheless, I’m really excited for the opportunity to reinvent myself. I went to the Religion & Spirituality Fair the other day, and I’m really interested in not only being apart of the Baha’i Student Association (wasn’t at the fair but I’m in contact with the leading people), but I kind of want to learn more about UKirk Atlanta, which is a very-liberal, Presbyterian church group that comes here every Thursday evening. I don’t know, the people were very gay-pride, bubbly, and quirky, so I think it would be enlightening and also fun. A lot of the groups, oddly enough, are okay with attendees not being of the faith, so I feel more encouraged to go to these meetings just as a means of learning about the religion and its community here on campus. I also went to the LGBT Freshman/Transfer Welcome Meeting, which was really nice. I’ll be honest, I don’t know if it was my place to go, I don’t believe in sexuality labels (meaning, I identify as non-conforming), and with that being said I don’t know if that constitutes as me being able to say I could fall into any of the LGBT spectrum. However, people were kind and maybe as I continue exploring myself, I’ll find that I fall more into one realm over a current one (I’ve been more attracted to masculinity/cis-men for a while now). With all this being said, it’s just really cool how many different student programs there are here on campus. Some others I want to explore are Club Weightlifting, A Cappella, Emory Dark Arts, Active Minds, Ballroom Dancing Club, a literary journal/newspaper, and some sort of community service oriented group. Unlike in high school, I feel like I want to be more involved in activities that are more like hobbies, rather than something that is related to my academic interests. We’ll see though, the Activities Fair is on Saturday, and I think now’s a good time to explore things and just kind of really start figuring out how and where I want to set my foot at this school.  In terms of my academic classes thus far, I’ve enjoyed all of them. I’m taking PSYC 110: Psychobiology & Cognition (General Psychology 1), RUSS 201: Intermediate Reading/Writing/Speaking, CHEM 150: Lecture & Lab (General Chemistry 1), and PHIL 111: Existentialism & European Philosophy. Aside from the class materials and textbooks being horribly expensive, I think I’m going to gain a lot from all these classes. I really like my professors for all of them, especially my philosophy instructor, who isn’t even a professor - he’s a PhD student who wears grayscale outfits, has plugs (stretches his lobes), a huge beard, and swears. Chemistry will be a difficult class for me, I can tell already, but the professor is super passionate and teamwork-oriented so I think I’ll come out of it with a good foundation in the science. The one class I feel a little strange about is my Russian class, because as a somewhat “native” speaker, it is strange to be in a room full of non-native speakers trying to speak Russian, as well as being in a Russian learning setting where the professor speaks English 85% of the time. The weird thing is, I feel like the class is moving very slowly and like we’re learning a lot of basic vocabulary, but I also don’t feel like I have the strong foundation in grammar to try and move up to the 300 level class. It’s so hard to judge placement at this point because it’s syllabus week, and the add/drop/swap period ends on Wednesday, so by Tuesday night, I would’ve only had 4 Russian classes to judge. I think I’m going to stick it out and then begin a different language next year, because I’m not planning on even minoring in Russian - it’s merely courses I’m taking to improve my ability to speak with relatives and people of my culture/heritage. I’m deciding between French and Arabic for this new language I want to start, but I also want to continue with Spanish, so I will probably end up studying that again at some point too. My psychology lecture is interesting in that a good half of the courses focuses on gender identity, sexuality, love, and topics of that nature - something I would not have expected to be included in an intro level course. Of course, the course also goes over the major sections of the brain, the five senses, and memory, but I find it strange that gender and sexuality is also a huge component. Nonetheless, it is something I wanted to learn more about so it��ll be cool!

My polaroid project has been going well, it will be a pricey investment, but I know I’ll enjoy looking back on it. 

[terresdebrume]

Sok sabay thomada

Today was nice! I woke up cold as heck, which still makes me snort whenever I think it because hello, Cambodia! But one, I’ve been living here for a little over two years now, which means I’m used to the temperatures nowadays and, two, the temperature in my apartment dropped below 30°c, which basically never happens. And that’s measuring close to the kitchen counter, where my pasta is cooking. So, yeah, pretty cool weather here in Phnom Penh, although the colleagues who only got here last September are still firmly in the ‘no, it’s a nice change’ club x)

I had a physiotherapy appointment, the payment for which is coming up and looking a little painful (not to self: definitely do not skip on renewing insurance tomorrow) but my ankle continues to improve! I hadn’t even realized it had never gone back to a healthy state after my first couple of motorbike accidents, but now that it is getting there again I can definitely feel the difference! I’ve got half a mind to ask if we can have a look at the other one to make sure everything is fine before we finish up to be honest—sure, it might make for another appointment or two, but I’m already $400 in so $40 more doesn’t sound that terrible at this point.

(I say that, but I also know that I have over $1550 of programmed spending this month and boy, am I glad I saved $600 specifically for this purpose last month because that’s the only thing that’ll keep me from going in the red this month. I miiiiiight be able to save a little bit, if I’m really good about not ordering food and sticking to the cheaper options while out for lunch.* Luckily for me, my khmer teacher is also a colleague so she doesn’t mind waiting for me to pay her, which means at worst I might be able to push that particular sum back to the end of February when my pay drops in. Or, you know, I could take a break in studying khmer altogether which…well. I’m considering it.**)

Anyways, I wanted to talk about today, not the state of my finances x)

So, today was nice. Physiotherapy went fine, work was low-pressure and pretty neat, even though I didn’t manage to do half of what I was supposed to do, and I don’t think I’m going to do it tonight either (but tomorrow morning, yeah, probably—I’m planning on leaving the house early anyway). It is definite proof that I cannot afford not to work on work stuff on the weekends if I want to stay on top of it because the time I actually spend at my workplace is taken by other things and so there’s always something left to do. (I haven’t started dreaming about grading essays late, yet, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it happened through the class session.)

Even so, the children’s class was nice! Okay, so I clearly hadn’t prepared enough material to last an hour and a half (I still don’t know how to hit that balance) but considering we lost about 20minutes on administrative problems (after which the kids were, of course, impossible to calm down) and other class-related-but-not-teaching things it ended up being fine—both of the groups/levels had material left to go over, so that should make my next class easier to plan which: hurray!

Tomorrow, I get to see my teenager class, for whom I expect to have a lot of creation to do through the session because the second half of the program is ridiculous and I have official permission to more or less ignore the book (while staying within the themes...so if anyone has ideas for language-learning activities that involve geography, history and music*** I’m all ears xD) which is great but is also going to mean so. Much. Work. And anyway, this class and I don’t mesh. I don’t think it’s particularly their fault, more that they’re a very quiet class with a solid half clearly not wanting to be there and I don’t know how to deal with that…hence, not meshing.

Although the part where I’m taking them to a concert on March 1st seems to have helped.

Oh well. We’ll have time to worry about the bad parts tomorrow! Right now I’m going to focus on the fact that my children’s class did not descend into complete chaos and be satisfied with that :P  

*I know food shouldn’t, ideally, be where I try to save money, but it’s my largest expenditure aside from taxis, and those I have to use to go to and from work. I’m trying to clear some space on my phone so I can get the cheaper app back, but that’s a really long run thing as it’ll only save me about $0.50 per ride. So, eating more humbly it is.

**There are cheaper options for studying khmer around, but I do enjoy my classes with Reaksmey, and I don't want to change teacher when I finally feel like I'm making progress on my khmer reading :/

***I’m skipping the math part. There’s a reason I didn’t become a math teacher.

[norihisahyuga-archived]

Empathy

Yamada Tatsumori & Kijima Natsuji Kamen Rider Fourze 2000~ words. Sfw.

Yamada has to move on after the events of his time spent as the Aries Zodiarts. It isn’t as easy as he might hope it would be. Luckily, he doesn’t have to do this alone if he doesn’t want to.

All things considered, it is unsurprising that Tatsumori Yamada spends the largest amount of time away from school. In more ways than one, it is a miracle that he wakes up at all. When his eyes open in the hospital room and the reality of his situation settles in, when he remembers the rush of power he had felt as the Aries Zodiarts, when he remembers how many people had suffered at his hands for nothing more than his whims, he doesn’t want to return to school. Even the comfort of being at Amanogawa instead of Subaruboshi is not enough to stir him from the hospital bed; he’s content to curl beneath the sheets and remain silent.

At the time, everything had seemed less than real to him; even the extent of his own powers had been something he could not quite grasp in any meaningful way. It takes him several days to remember the full course of his evolution, the Lepus Zodiarts Switch warm in his palm. When he had first journeyed onto the campus, it had felt less real, less solid than his own, and so it had been much simpler, much easier, to press the Switch he had been given.

There had been no one to stop him or corral him, and though Hayami had come to check up on him frequently at first, no one had come to fight him. That had come much later, when he had made the evolution from Lepus to Aries and when his abilities had reached their frightening and riveting potential. When his Switch had changed and when Gamou had congratulated him on finally becoming everything he was always meant to be.

It takes him an additional week to remember his deal with Ryusei Sakuta, the promise that he would bring his friend out of his coma if he killed Kamen Rider Fourze. The shock makes his heart rate spike to worrying degrees, high enough that a nurse had come to check on him, but his heart rate was hardly the reason why her presence became necessary. It was the following panic attack, the way he had clawed desperately at his own skin, the way he had screamed until his throat had been raw. It seemed like a scene in a movie, and yet it was real. He killed someone.

Two months passed before he found himself able to leave the hospital, and by that point he had withdrawn further into himself than he ever had before. He spent a few weeks at home, just trying to create some kind of routine, trying to venture out of the door without that overwhelming curtain of fear hanging over his head until there was almost no way he could leave the house.

In the end, he only manages a handful of days on campus before he finds himself too overwhelmed. Home school is how he finishes out high school, and though his grades are as high as they have ever been, and he ultimately graduates with honors, he feels no sense of accomplishment from it. University accepts him just the same.

He doesn’t expect to see anyone he knows. He certainly doesn’t expect to find himself sharing a literature class with Natsuji Kijima, the annoying rakugo club leader who insisted on making everything into a pun. Yamada had done his best to avoid him, silently irritated by his puns but never one to confront someone to their face.

The fact he shares this same class with Ryusei Sakuta is enough to frighten him into considering dropping the class just so he doesn’t have to see his face each time he comes to class. He doesn’t know if his frayed nerves can take the strain.

It’s only his second class when Sakuta speaks to him. Yamada has his head down, organizing his notes for the class, prepared to take more when Sakuta sits down in the empty seat next to him. “I hope you don’t mind,” he says, sparing Yamada a long and considering look.

“It’s fine.” Yamada clicks the end of his pen nervously, swallowing hard around the lump in his throat. His mouth is dry, his tongue like cotton in his mouth. “I would think you would avoid sitting next to me if you could, though.”

“Gentaro taught me a lot about forgiveness. In the end, we were all young and being preyed upon by someone who only wanted to use us for his own ends.” Sakuta extends his hand, and Yamada leans away from it. “I want to offer you that forgiveness if you want it.”

He has no right to ask for it, and yet he doesn’t have to. Sakuta offers it so freely with eyes that are warm and sincere, and Yamada bows his head before tentatively taking his hand. “Thanks.”

Their conversation draws the attention of the person sitting in front of them, and Yamada frowns when he sees the boy turn around in his seat, recognizing Kijima without even having to try. “What are the two of you on about with this forgiveness thing?”

Sakuta smiles at him, handsome and disarming, and Yamada ducks his head a little. “I meant to offer you this as well, actually. Holding onto the past only creates more problems in the future. We were young, like I said. We all made mistakes.”

“You throw forgiveness around like confetti. It should be more precious than that. That being said.” Kijima grabs Sakuta by the hand, flashing him his typical shit-eating grin. “Thank you. I was an idiot and I could have seriously hurt you and your friends.”

Yamada clicks his pen nervously again, and Kijima finally notices him. “You okay, Yamada?”

“Fine,” he says, twirling his pen between his fingers just to have something to do.

“You look pretty jittery,” Kijima says, and he leans close enough that Yamada has to physically fight his urge to shrink away from him to get some of his personal space back. “Look, if you don’t want to be here, we can always get you the notes after the fact. If you’re anything like me then the school probably already knows you might need to leave class sometimes.”

Bitterly, Yamada laughs. It’s true; his mental health has been down and out since his recovery, and though he does his best to make all of his classes and his appointments, the real world becomes too much for him sometimes and he has to get away from it all or risk his mental health in the process. And considering he would actually like to graduate from university and carve some kind of future for himself, he has to push through as much as he can.

Sakuta leans a little closer to him as well. “He’s right. Between the two of us, we’ll probably get everything you’d write yourself. Take a break if you need it.”

“Thank you.” Yamada shoves his books and pen back into his bag, bowing to the two of them before hurrying out of class, leaving the stifling room behind and stepping out into the fresh air.

It only occurs to him on the way back to his room that he’s never heard Kijimi speak multiple sentences without making a terrible play on words.

When a knock comes at his door during the early evening, Yamada sits down the book he’s been reading and climbs out of bed to see who’s come to see him. His roommate has been out all day and likely will not be home before tomorrow morning, having cited a study meeting that will go into the late hours of night and probably involve staying over with a friend. All things considered, the guy has been not too bad to share a room with.

Yamada opens the door just a crack, frowning when he finds Kijima standing on his doorstep “How did you know where my room is?”

“I realized after you left class that you didn’t tell us how to contact you with the notes,” Kijima says, holding up a sheaf of pages. “Sakuta and I had to do quite a bit of asking around to find someone who would know. Luckily, your roommate was in the library when we were making clean copies of our notes for you. You’re a hard man to track down.”

Smiling thinly, Yamada stands back, opening the door and gesturing for Kijima to step inside. “Sorry. I was focused on leaving the room as fast as humanly possible.”

“I figured that when you bolted out of the room on us. Like I said, we don’t blame you for it. I think I get it a little better than he does.” Kijima steps in enough for Yamada to shut the door behind him, setting the packet on top of Yamada’s laptop at the foot of his bed. “For what it’s worth, you’re handling things a lot better than I would have expected given what Sakuta told me after class. You sure you’re doing okay?”

“Ah, he told you about what I asked him to do.” Yamada grimaces, dropping down on the edge of his bed. The memory hasn’t exactly stopped haunting him.

Kijima sits down in Yamada’s office chair, leaning back in it. “To be fair, I stole their souls and cut them. If Sakuta hadn’t been able to kick my ass, they would have probably died.”

If that is supposed to make Yamada feel better, it isn’t exactly working. “Why did you decide to be the one who brought me my notes?”

“I asked Sakuta if I could do it. We didn’t exactly talk much in school, but we were both into words. I remember you getting in trouble in class because all you did was keep your nose in a book.” Kijima smiles, as if the memory is a fond one for him, but Yamada doesn’t understand why that would be a fond memory for him. “But more than that, we were both Horoscopes, we both made mistakes, and we both hurt people. But I get the sense I bounced back from that far better than you did. Are you sure you’re doing okay?”

Yamada chews on his bottom lip; the question is a difficult one for him, far more difficult than he can express in words. “Is it okay to not have an answer for you yet?”

“I understand. Yeah, it’s fine.” Kijima drums his fingers on the arm of the chair, and Yamada notices something else he happens to be missing other than just his wordplay.

“What happened to your fan?” he asks.

Kijima winces. “I, ah, don’t carry it around with me anymore. Truth be told, I haven’t exactly done any rakugo since I started back in school. It has a lot of bad memories tied to it, but I’m going to work on it, you know? What about you? It looks like you’re still reading.”

“Ah, yes, I am. When you don’t have many friends to begin with, books are nice.” Yamada shrugs, figuring his reasoning his self-explanatory enough. “If you, ah, wanted to try to work your way back into it… My roommate’s girlfriend is involved in the rakugo club here on campus and I know they wouldn’t mind another member making his presence known.”

Grinning, Kijima cocks his head at him. “You’re a really sweet guy, you know that? When it comes right down to it. Thanks for the offer. Maybe I’ll take you up on that.”

Yamada nods. He figures extending the hand of friendship might prove to be valuable, and he supposes it’s the least he can do when Kijima is clearly making some sort of effort toward him as well. “No problem. We might have done stupid things in high school, but we went through something terrible and it might be nicer just to have someone around who understands.”

“I like the sound of that.” Kijima nods at the packet. “Go ahead and go through that and see if it’s good for you. If not, I can do my best to dictate everything I can remember.”

The notes are fine. Just the same, Kijima sticks around.