#i had all these self portraits and comics and stuff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

your-unfriendlyghost · 1 month ago

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How'd you end up discovering your art style?

Well, it wasn’t much of a discovery- it’s just how I draw, I guess! It evolves over time and changes based on what artists I’m looking up to and what styles I’m into

But I can give ya a (recent-ish) evolution of my style/a break-down on all its influences over the past two years if ya wanna see how it all happened!

Some stuff from July-October of 2022

Two-three-ish years ago, for instance, it was more classical painting inspired. I was real into Over the Garden Wall and also just…general American history back then don’t judge I was coming off of my first American history class since elementary school and I thought it was so cool So my art had more of like…that going on yk? It wasn’t as good as my stuff now at all, because I’ve since improved my anatomy skills, learned how to draw fabric folds (sorta), and learned a bit of color theory lol. But they’re ok for what they are, I guess.

I think my main problem back then was the fact that I did not fully know how to use references- and a lotta my references were like. Cartoons. And stuff that was very much not meant to be painted in the amount of detail I aimed for at the time.

(Even here, you can tell I was dissatisfied, because they all look pretty different from each other yk?) (and you can see how hardly any of the fabric has folds and how little I understood lighting 😭)

January-March ‘23

Anyhow, after this, in uhh early 2023, I had a 80s-90s comic book/pop art phase, which was a pretty drastic swing in the opposite direction. I still rendered things sometimes, but things were less soft/warm. BUT I was starting to use real photos as references which was vital

I was also watching a lotta tmnt with my kid brother, which is what I blame for why the proportions got so stylized- folks in the 2012 version of that show were just kinda built funny, which I think subconsciously impacted my art. My posing did get a bit stronger in this time as I practiced more, and I think things got less stiff

June-August ‘23

Next, as the summer months came, I had a lotta changes in inspo and also just in life lol. I had temporarily moved to my neighbor’s place, and I didn’t have a car yet/any friends who I liked enough to hang around with, so all summer long I rewatched a lotta 80s movies, fell in love with the first season of Stranger Things (not the others as much tho 😭), skateboarded, and watched a lotta art tutorials online. (I specifically remember Jackie Droujko’s yt shorts saving my assss- I loved her stuff so much. Definitely check ‘em out she explains things real well)

I improved slowly, but I DID IMPROVE a HELLUVA LOT. I focused a lot on trying to draw people who looked recognizably like themselves, but also stylized because realism (usually) bores me. I also got better at coloring- the first two here ain’t great in terms of colors, but I was learning. Plus, back then I was very into oddly saturated color schemes. (I mean it is a solid vibe. I may not do this a ton anymore but I can dig it still)

October-November ‘23

As autumn came, I was pretty enamored with all the like…✨fall vibes✨ that time around. My life was goin’ well, so I had a lotta optimism and a re-ignited love for nature, forests, and fantasy. Plus I was dating this girl who was really into vintage-y Wes Anderson stuff so I think some of that uhhh twee-ness rubbed off on me lol

My influences here were mainly old storybooks, a hint of Lord of the Rings (as you can probably tell by the hobbit), and a decent amount of Fantastic Mr. Fox. And for faces I was mainly using the Laurenillusrated Brushpack at the time I think? I don’t use the “Sketchy” brush in it as often anymore as I did then, but I should. It’s a great brush, and I actually am really liking all the little sketchy lines. It adds a nice touch.

also don’t look at my goddamn long hair in that self portrait on the left. I hated it on me then and I hate it now too. I cannot believe I ever let it get that long it was really bad

December ‘23-April ‘24

I honestly did like a total of like. Seven drawings in these four months. As opposed to my usual…uhhh I wanna say 25 every four months. Idk what was up- art just wasn’t fun at the time. I mean, it was also just a lousy few months in general, so I’m sure that’s a part of it lol, but yk. This style is pretty close to my current one- my inspiration just came from x-files-ish sci-fi and American gothic stories/images as opposed to nowadays’ Beat generation and greaser inspo.

May-Now (October) ‘24

The Outsiders kinda dragged me back into enjoying drawing again honestly. I’d read and loved it back in 2023, but upon rereading it/watching the movie in February of 2024, it just sorta…entered my headspace and stayed this time. (Still, I didn’t really draw any Outsiders/greaser-y things till May)

Lately, I take artistic inspiration in 2d animated films, like the ones by Disney with the real nicely drawn fabric folds. And also just a lotta inspo from real life. I also do a lot of black and white comics, because I find that I generally have a “Go big or go home” mentality about most things- which can be a LOT of pressure! By allowing myself to draw simpler doodle-y things, I’ve regained that love for drawing. I think for a while it just felt like work, but in letting myself take it easy, art’s become a good time again :))

#ask #how i draw #digital art #rambling #my art #talking about myself #personal stuff #art evolution #long post

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siennaditbot · 1 year ago

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I don't like to rant about personal stuff online but my mom said smth that really bugged me and I thought yall could relate.

I like to draw cartoony stuff, mostly humans and Sonic characters. I have dabbled in realistic art but it's not really my thing, you know?

My mom's always frustrated whenever I show her my Sonic stuff. "Those characters again, you should draw something different!"

Today she said that I should try making "real art" so she could see if I'm actually good. I was drawing a cartoony self portrait.

"Real art."

I get it. Mona Lisa and all the other fancy paintings etc, it's what people think art is.

But art can be silly doodles. Wild expressions. Messy sketches. Anthropomorphic animals doing human things. Exaggerated movement. Unrealistic body proportions.

Realism is art, sure, don't get me wrong.

But art isn't necessarily realism.

I grew up with cartoons and comics. My brother taught me to read before school and I read the same comics he did. Tintin, Asterix and Obelix, Lucky Luke and a lot of Donald Duck.

Those had an effect on me, especially Don Rosa's Scrooge McDuck stuff and the Italian Donald Duck artists whose names I can never remember.

The stories and the way they were told. The expressions and funny things happening in the background. Varying line weights.

Cartoony stuff isn't childish. It's exaggeration of things that realistic things do portray. It's creative. Fun.

Art is so much more than portraits or landscapes. It's bringing life and character to things that might not even exist or be impossible. It's storytelling. It's passion.

There's no "real art".

All art is art.

Don't deprecate people's hobbies and interests. Just because they're not painting the next Mona Lisa doesn't mean they're any less of an artist.

Let people express themselves.

If you don't, you just might cause them to stop making art completely. Or stop showing their art to you.

Be nice.

Make art the way you want.

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master-of-the-game · 10 months ago

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seeing you make oil paintings of elim garak has changed something about the way i perceive art, both in what others make but also in what i am capable of making.

it’s probably due to learning mostly euro-centric art history, but i’ve always thought of oil paintings as like the peak of painting ability? like, it’s fancy and it takes a while so i thought that it must be the best (ignoring the fact that my artistic field is mostly in acrylic paints and 3D sculpting and yet i still consider it very good). and i’m still working on disproving this sort of mentality that there are mediums inherently better than others, because it’s incredibly limiting to my creativity to impose a higharchy, and also it feels kind of xenophobic.

i digress a bit. point is, i’ve viewed oil paintings as a medium only deserving of gallery-type realistic portrait stuff, which is very much not what i do. i don’t make the sorts of fancy art rich people would pay for- the type of art i thought oils were for. i make paintings of comic book characters and sculptures of my personal heroes, i make jewelry and clothes and stuffed animals. stuff that i enjoy. which is good!

but still somewhere lurking in my brain was this voice telling me that on some level my works weren’t as meaningful or creative because they were fan works or made from materials i’m not an expert in or because the only people i draw and paint and sculpt are queer and trans, like me. that because my art was self-indulgent, on some level i suppose i thought it lesser.

but then i see your art. and holy shit! you’re work is INCREDIBLE! at first i was excited because, hey, i’m a big star trek fan, and garak is one of my favorite characters. i love coming across fan art of him, and it always manages to strike a chord with me. but then. as i looked at it closer, i realized it was on canvas. as i scrolled down i realize it was oil on canvas.

before, i’d pretty much only seen fanart as sketches on paper or digital drawings. one that is really only meant art-wise for quick sketches or planning of what will become “real” works, and one that doesn’t actually take up any physical space in our world, and is stored away in a little digital file.

but oil on canvas? that’s not meant to be thrown away, it’s meant to be held in gloved hands, as it is precious, and it’s not meant to be hidden away in the “files” on a laptop. no, those hang on the walls of museums or houses, meant to be displayed with pride for all to see.

and with those too colliding thoughts, that of fan works as some lesser form of art but oil paintings being the art of the rich and talented… well i realized that both were wrong. fan works are not in any way shape or form lesser than original works. what makes my layered ink painting of dream of the endless any less important than my painting of the ocean during a storm? nothing! they’re both good works. and on the other side, there is nothing that makes my oil paintings more important than my acrylic paintings or my sculpture or my knitting. it’s all art, lovely art, in the end. and the only thing that really matters is that i enjoy it.

seeing your art has helped me break some (minor) yet harmful thoughts i didn’t really even realize i had. so thank you for that. also your garak art is fucking good, and it really makes me think about what sort of life he would have after ds9. anyways, thank you. that’s what i’ve been meaning to say (that’s what this whole thing is). thanks for changing my vision for the better.

Oh wow! You know, it is very important and gratifying to know that results of your work make person rearrange their thoughts and views on something. Thank you for your sincerity! Now back to subject. I personally believe that fan work can be something fine and vice versa something fine can be a fan work. One thing that is very important to remember and remind yourself is that most of fine art that you've mentioned - gallery and most famous works (at least in european tradition) - are, well, derivative. Of Bible, of ancient myths. Yes. All this stuff can be considered maybe not fanart - but it is a subject for discussion - but illustration at least. And it is still fine art. Book illustrations - oh well. Sometimes I want to hang them on the wall, especially old ones. So - why not? Fan work always has a connotation of something derivative, and it certainly is... But just as well as most of the most prominent works. Dixi :D So that's the matter. Medium of course matters but medium does not always define the subject of art (except for common sense), as you've said. It's just maybe the cost of medium (some watercolor brushes for some reason cost... ehm. Too much :D) that defines its price, but not necessarily. I like thinking about this issue and discussing it... Plenty room for ideas. Thank you!

#star trek #art #fanart #artwork #my art #fanwork #oil painting #oil on canvas #art mediums #painting #graphics

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chibishortdeath · 1 year ago

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Fuck it, Simon Belmont, because why not you basically themed your blog after him

You don’t have any specific numbers, so I’m just answering every question >:3c mwahahaha—

1. “Why do you like this character”:

A lot of reasons!!! First off, most of his games are super fun and some of my favorite platformers just in general. I replay CV1, Simon’s Quest, and SCV4 most often cause they’re a real joy to play! I also absolutely LOVE Simon’s story, I’ve considered making comics about it if I could ever get out of recent art block whoops, even though I’ve seen many people say he doesn’t have one (´TωT｀). His designs are really cool, he’s got great music in his games, there’s just a lot to love and I’ll explain more in detail in other questions.

2. “Favorite canon thing?”

I really like the concept that he looks up to Christopher as this legendary hero and then ends up considered the same kind of legendary hero by Juste and others after him. It’s pretty ironic, kinda bittersweet, especially after being hated for so long. Castlevania loves its cycles like that. Also just Simon’s Quest in general, I love that game.

3. “Least favorite canon thing?”

Ooo that’s very hard. There’s kinda a lot of things about him that aren’t explained or confirmed, especially personality wise, but I kinda like that in a way cause it leaves room for interpretation and whatnot. Idk hmmm. I’m gonna go with Grimoire of Souls in general. I had some hopes for it, but it ended up being kinda lame. A lot of the characterization was weird and don’t even start me on things like the Cursed Whip theory being in there 💀. So I just choose to ignore it and not consider it canon.

4. “If you could put this character in another media, what would it be?”

I have thought about drawing him as if he was a character in other series for ages lol. I’ve already drawn him as a Pokémon trainer, I’ve thought about drawing Castlevania and Soul Eater crossovers before, and I tried drawing him in the style of Resident Evil 1 but could not get the art style down. Idk put him in Fortnite or something that’d be funny we already got Solid Snake so Konami has been in talks with them I guess X,,,,,,,,,,D

5. “What’s the first song that comes to mind when you think of them?”

Probably either Simon’s Theme (of course lol) or Bloody Tears, but I do wanna mention that I have a YouTube playlist of songs I wanna make Simon animations with eventually (alas animation is HARD).

6. “What’s something you have in common with the character?”

Mostly negative things unfortunately d(;w; ). Like self comparison, doubt in my own abilities, trouble making and keeping friends, etc etc. Although a lot of these are based on assumptions and interpretations, as a lot of him usually is. Simon does have a really similar hair color to me on the NES box art tho so that’s cool.

7. “What’s something the fandom does with this character that you like?”

There’s a lot of really nice art of him!!! Usually portraits, but sometimes there’s other doodles and whatnot too :3. Cool fan redesigns too! I also have seen a lot of neat headcanons, a lot of which I’ve adopted. I also appreciate the Captain N reunion stuff for the most part, it’s pretty wholesome.

8. “What’s something the fandom does with this character that you don’t like?”

I’ve seen a lot of comics, especially around when Smash Bros Ultimate came out, that were really… weird. I think all of them could kinda be boiled down to “old = bad” in the way that the artists probably just found out he was from the 1600s and then decided to make him the Boomer to Richter’s Gen Z for whatever reason (ya know despite Richter being from the 1700s but anyway). Simon would either be the jerk in the situation and/or the butt of the joke. I don’t think that Simon would have any issue with any of the female characters’ outfits let alone start harassing them for it. I saw some comics that made fun of him for not speaking very much in some genuinely disgusting ways too. Like making him not able to read or practically just the generic caveman stereotype. Especially in cases where the artist would depict other silent NES protagonists really nicely after making Simon out to be a complete idiot and asshole. There was also the trend of making him generally be all “oh no witchcraft!!!!!!!!!! What sin!!!!!!! The horror!!!!!!!!” about like anything and everything. I guess a lot of this comes from Smash Bros fans not usually being fans of Castlevania, but I’ve seen it in the Castlevania fandom too just less frequently. There’s also the “Simon has no story” thing oof. I’ve seen people tell people to skip his games or play fan games instead before :(

9. “Could you be roommates with this character?”

Realistically, no, my room is too small for another person :(. If that wasn’t an issue, then yeah probably :).

10. “Could you be best friends with this character?”

I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO—

11. “Would you date this character?”

No, he’s probably married, generally feels more like a bestie, and I’m aroace lol

12. “What headcanon do you have for this character?”

Too many oh my god. I think he probably makes things. That’s a very vague sentence lol, but think like armor, knives, general woodworking, all his necklaces and headbands and stuff, etc. He generally seems like he keeps to himself and lives mostly alone, so I can see him doing all that by himself. He keeps some bones and teeth of things he hunts most of the time. A lot of people have him as the most super Christian of the family, but I see him as like Christian but really not organized or strict about it, if that makes sense? I’ve seen someone else describe the Belmonts as like “Christopagan” before and yeah I think that fits. Idk why but I have consistently drawn him with his cross necklace in his mouth sometimes. I headcanon him as semiverbal (I think that’s the correct term for it, basically like inbetween speaking and nonspeaking). I like to think he’s like really average height for the 1600s cause he’s about as tall as other townspeople and skeletons and stuff. Which is funny cause that’d make him like 5’5-5’7 ish and that’s kinda short in modern day lol. And I guess that makes his 8bit sprite being used all the time make more sense XD. I have way more, I didn’t even get into Simon’s Quest related ones, but I don’t wanna make this too long aaaaaaaaaaaa

13. “What’s an emoticon that reminds you of the character or you think they’d use a lot?”

Ok this is funny cause I actually do have one for this and it’s got context. It’s the “:3”. So I was watching a bunch of people’s playthroughs one night cause I was bored and ran into a channel with a toooooon of speedruns of maps from Harmony of Despair. Whenever they’d get to a boss battle they’d use the typing feature just to go “hi” with a different cutesy emoticon every time, but when they got to Dracula they specifically went for the “hi :3” and then went “oh no :(“ when Dracula started attacking and now that’s the way I think he’d text I guess.

14. “Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character”

How does one properly explain how much this guy slays in one aesthetic term—

15. “What’s your favorite ship for this character?”

Oooooo, in canon probably like his wife (Selena) and/or the Mysterious Woman (who could be the same character depending on what theories you go by), but outside of that Simon Belmont x Getsu Fuma and I can’t even explain exactly why, but it’s pretty cute.

16. “What’s your least favorite ship for this character?”

Any BelmontXBelmont shipping ugh, it’s unfortunately really common on some places… also the whole Lucas or Pit or whatever other child character thing the smash bros fandom had ugh. I guess I also just don’t see the appeal of shipping any of the Belmonts with Dracula.

17. “What’s a ship you don’t hate but it’s not your favorite?”

I’ve also seen people ship him with Solid Snake, Palutena, or Bayonetta before. Ummm he doesn’t really have a lot of other characters he’s shipped with tbh. Idk I saw someone ship him with one of the priests from Simon’s Quest once.

18. “Relationship in canon you admire?”

Unfortunately he doesn’t really talk to people enough in game to form canon relationships 😔

19. “Relationship in canon you don’t like?”

I don’t even know if I can answer this one for the same reasons as the above 💀💀💀. I guess the townspeople hating the hell out of him, but I don’t hate that cause it’s kinda integral to the plot???? Yeah idk lol

20. “What character is the ideal best friend for this character?”

Simon and Shanoa would get along a lot I think. Sara too. Hmmmm… I think he and Alucard would probably also be good friends. Christopher too for many reasons. Simon just really needs friends my poor dude is out here in Dracula’s Castle and the Romanian countryside after being cursed alone like this poor guy :’(

21. “If you’re a fic writer, what’s your favorite thing to do when writing this character? What’s something you don’t like?”

I have not written much at all, however what small comics I have done I looooove to make sure to sprinkle in whatever symbols he has in the games into it. He has a lot of cool things ranging from like rose thorns to The Hanged Man card and a lot of them end up meaning things like martyrdom and whatnot idk I made a post about it a while ago :3. I also like specifically Simon’s Quest speculation stuff, like what if scenarios for the vague, left open spots of it. If it’s not something super angsty or lore heavy, it’s usually just wholesome character interactions or doodling him being comforted by Christopher or Trevor cause I was sad or something lol. As far as things I don’t like writing uh idk that’s hard, maybe just any kind of filler scenes cause I’m not very good at those oof. Dialogue is hard too 💀💀💀

22. “If you’re a fic reader, what’s something you like/don’t like to see in fics?”

I’ve mentioned a lot of things I don’t like seeing in uh question 8, but things I do like is when people really try to go full horror with him. I’ve seen some Simon’s Quest fics (sadly there’s very few :’3) that really try to get that same feeling of anxiousness and dread the game does and I love that honestly. It’s a really dark story in the series! I also saw one that went psychological horror with it with him kinda losing himself a little at night it’s just ough it’s cool :D! Simon is a horror protagonist! Make him afraid!!!

23. “Favorite picture of this character?”

Again, too many!!! X3

24. “What other character from another fandom reminds you of them?”

Not from fandoms I am in (yet, hopefully I’ll get into these), but Ragnvaldr from Fear and Hunger I’ve heard is just directly inspired by him and Alfred from Bloodborne also, to me, seems heavily inspired by him. The whole Vilebloods section seems very Castlevania inspired tbh. From other fandoms I’m in, that’s hard to say, there’s not really any I don’t think.

25. “What was your first impression of this character, is it the same as now?”

Well I got into Castlevania through Smash Bros and at first was completely indifferent about him, he was just kinda fun to play as. Then Richter got me to play SotN and actually get into the series more. I had no idea I had SotN on XBOX360 for a long time, but that made it pretty easy to start playing. And now I am absolutely hooked and Simon is my favorite character so uh yeah X3.

26. “Freebie!”

I guess I just say anything? Ok, I am currently half trying to cosplay Simon’s Simon’s Quest design rn! I have like everything but the armor, but I’ll have to wait a while to be able to get materials for it oof. But yeah :). Hopefully that works out.

Ok yeah that’s pretty dang long wow, but yeah, thanks for the ask!!!! I am happy to rant about Simon anytime :3

#castlevania #castlevania games #text post #simon belmont #asks #ask game #yay! Simon :3 #I feel like I could probably go on even longer with other questions but uh yeah #more reason to do more of these ask things they’re fun :)#incoherent rambling #idk if I should put a cut somewhere in this cause WOW that is LONG jesus #hmmmmmmmmmmmmm idk #I should post some of the Simon and Fuma art I have sometime when I’m not feeling weirdly self conscious about it—

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slimylittlemaggot · 8 months ago

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(breaks into your lab by literally shooting a me-sized hole in the door with a shotgun)

Hey so I had an idea for a bit

HOW DIFFERENT CHARACTERS DRAW

Ok so we start with prime. He mostly draws stuff cuboidal with square designs, for a bunch or reasons, most of which he does know

Stuffie (our favorite plushie related eldritch horror) draws like those kids do in those horror videos. Childlike drawings of horrifying things. Usually self portraits. Hims creepy under that poncho

Caffeine is a silly lil kitty and cannot draw please ignore the random religious art on the floor

The Bioweapon: detailed drawings of parasites and viruses mixed with notes on himself and all his mutations

Robo prime: disturbingly violent drawings of what he wants to do to the villains

Robo: Engineering stuff. Also people as robots

The botanist: plants, murder, the usual

The Evil Scientist: yaoi, and also robots. Sometimes robot yaoi

The mad scientist: Uber patriotic art glorifying guns and war

Felix: his old band mates, his love, and also places he remembers

Nick Dynamite: his wife, and ways to kill her to take her stuff

Charlotte: see husband (I promise it's just their love language)

Bones Malone: landscape drawings of hell and also sometimes adventures he's been on

The target: comics of his best kills, drawings of his love, and also paintings of his pets in motion

Commissar Jaxx Janson: his husband, wars, and the best way to kill anything that might be a danger to the imperium of man

Rogue trader Rouge Janson: art of him and his husband, both spicy and normal.

I will continue later. Probably tomorrow morning

Caffeine is me fr

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twohundreddeadchildren · 1 year ago

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You know when a little kid gives you a drawing and you ask them to sign it for when they're famous?

I've been doing that my whole life, and when we had to take all my grandfather's stuff from his old house, about twelve years after he died, I found out he used to do that too.

He was an art teacher, and he had kept a lot of self portraits from his middle school students, and all of them had a name and last name, so we decided to try and track them and give them their drawings back, you know?

Turns out one of my grandfather's middle school students is a really famous comic book artist. I'm talking his illustrations were in my textbooks as examples of good writing famous. Life's weird.

#I don’t even know if my grandfather ever found out about that #but I'd like to imagine he's proud

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rauko-creates · 2 years ago

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Master List

List/links for all my Supernatural, Venom, and original works (under the cut cause wow there's actually kind of a lot lol)

Original Art:

Even If We Can't See You

GISH Stuff

Lily and the Stars

Mockingbird for @aloha-cowgirl

My Hallows Eve: Summoning

Punk Mermaid (b/w sketch) (with color)

Tiamat

Trogdor Fire Safety Poster

You Made Music Over Me

Spn Art:

Art for Carnivore (Destiel Hell Rescue Fic)

Art for Enemies at Sea (Destiel) by @rathskitten

Art for Rapunzel, Rapunzel by @diminuel (Destiel)

Art for The Curse of Years by@blueraven06 (Destiel)

Attack Dog Cas

Both Hands on the Wheel/"Touch It"

Cas With Wings

Cas With Wings and Halo

Dancing Gentleman for Hold Me While You Wait (Destiel wip)

Dean and Cas Kissing in the Shadows for Talk Green to Me by@winchester-reload

Feminist!Cas (On Thursdays, We Stab the Patriarchy)

I Deserved to be Loved

"I Should Have Protected You"

Jack, Winged Protector

Misha (because I can't stop drawing him)

Rachel Miner Skittles Portrait

The God of Laundry and Hipbones (sleepy crop-top Cas)

Trenchcoat Angel

Wayward Ladies

When there's Nothing to Burn

When Your Eyes Match Your Mood (Blue)

Original Poetry:

A Lily is a Good Flower

Change

Closeted Gross

Exist

Find Me

Much

Purple

This Fucking Box

You

Spn Poetry:

"Don't Do This, Cas" (Destiel)

"Hello, Dean." (Destiel)

His Name on Your Tongue (Destiel)

I Deserved to be Loved (Crowley)

Ocean's Brawl (for Destiel pirate!au)

Roses Are Red, Don't Lock Yourself in a Coffin You Fucking Martyr Destiel)

Son of a Bitch (Destiel)

The Very Touch of You Does Not Corrupt (Destiel)

Venom Fic:

He Helps (Part 1) (Part 2) (1,623 words) (Rating: M) (Symbrock, Anne/Dan) Tags: established relationship, Eddie and Venom are THAT couple okay lol, kisses, shower not sex lol, Venom's clingy but doesn't like being called out on it Summary: Dan get's a little too curious for his own good about just how much Venom is there for with Eddie's daily activities (Spoilers: the answer is he's always there)

I Saw You (792 words) (Rating: T) (Symbrock) Tags: angst, fluff, emotional hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending, coda Summary: What if Eddie actually HAD seen Venom at that rave? (In which Eddie goes to get Venom himself when he realizes he misses him instead of sending someone else to do it when he realizes he needs him)

Kiss Him Yourself (618 words) (Rating: T) (Symbrock) Tags: kissing, Anne knows, coda Summary: I'm just saying that there was space between when Anne got Venom from Mrs. Chen and when Venom rejoined Eddie and I think Anne and Venom probably talked, and Anne probably gave Venom some good advice.

Let Me Do It (100 words) (Rating: G) (Symbrock) Tags: skipping stones, fluff Summary: Venom is a show-off

The Loser Who Will Save Him (Symbrock)

What We Feel (476 words) (rating: G) (Symbrock) Tags: beech scene coda, fluff, blatant use of quotes from the comics, Eddie calling Venom My Love Summary: “It had whispered to him things about himself which he did not know...and the whisper had proved irresistibly fascinating. It echoed loudly within him because he was hollow at the core. “It was written that I should be loyal to the nightmare of my choice.” -Joseph Conrad, Heart of Darkness

Destiel One Shots:

'Cause I'm Yours (2,210 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel, Saileen) Tags: dancing, love confessions, angst, fluff, Dean Winchester's low self-esteem, everyone knows, post-canon Summary: Cas gets tired of watching Dean dance with bridesmaids and steps outside for a breather. Dean notices and follows him to see what's wrong. ***or*** That one where Cas is so very tired of pretending that he isn't madly in love with Dean...and also of pretending he can't see the way Dean loves him back. Feathers (2,324 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel) Tags: canon-verse, wing fic, wing grooming, mild angst, fluff Summary: Cas finally has his wings back, but...they're stuck on this plane, and they're getting feathers everywhere. He thinks Dean hates them. He's...very mistaken. I Need You (1426 words) (Rating: M) (Destiel) Tags: time skips, Dean needs Cas, love confessions, fluff, mild angst, first kiss, canon-verse Summary: Dean needs Cas for...well, maybe he just needs Cas. (Written for the prompt "A kiss...out of necessity) Nothing Fucks With My Baby (620 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel) Tags: protective!Cas, BAMF!Cas, BAMF!Dean, murder husbands, established relationship, canon verse, canon typical violence Summary: I was feeling an intense need to listen to Hozier's NFWMB on repeat while writing about Cas smiting the shit out of everything in the way to get to Dean and slaughtering everything that dared to lay a hand on him. Not that Dean's a damsel in distress in this situation; he's actually holding his own just fine. Cas is just intense. Sing Love (2,688 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel) Tags: idiots in love, singing, mild angst, fluff, love confessions, first kiss, Sam ships it, canon-verse Summary: Castiel returns from a grocery run with Sam and overhears Dean singing love songs in the shower and decides to confront Dean with a song of his own ***or*** The one where Castiel finds out Dean's might just be in love with him too The God of Laundry and Hipbones (1,819 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel) Tags: college au, Cas is too pretty for Dean to be smart, Dean's pink panties, fluff Summary: Written for the prompt "I’m sorry you caught me moving your clothes out of the dryer but in my defense I’ve been waiting for one to open up for about an hour now." Basically, Dean catches Cas moving his laundry, gawks at him like an idiot until he leaves, and then spends the next several months not being able to find him...until he does and falls all over himself again. The Nature of a Thing (1,569 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel) Tags: first kiss, fluff, profound bond Summary: Wherein Dean is pretty sure that he and Cas are a thing but is trying to figure out exactly what that thing is.

The Ocean (224 words) (Rating: G) (Destiel) Tags: fluff, canon-verse Summary: Dean finally gets to go to the ocean, and it helps him figure out some familiar feelings

Thief (229 words) (Rating: G) (Destiel) Tags: fluff, pie, canon-verse Summary: Dean makes pie. Castiel is the best thief.

This Is What You Give to Me (479 words) (Rating: G) (Destiel) Tags: fluff, cuddling, established Destiel, post-canon Summary: Just a fluffy little thing about cuddling and Cas musing on how glad he is to be with Dean.

This Is What You Give to Me [PODFIC] (see above for details)

Until You Understand (1529 words) (Rating: M) (Destiel)

Tags: mild angst, fluff, character development, non-explicit sexual content, Dean's low sense of self-worth, emotional hurt/comfort Summary: Castiel loves Dean. He loves him. He loves him. He loves him.And he is 100% done with Dean’s self-sacrificing and self-deprecating. It’s no longer allowed.

We Are Hope (533 words) (Rating: G) (Destiel)

Tags: spn 15x02 coda Summary: Castiel finally understands the essence of hope, and he's going to be that for Dean, even as the world crumbles around them.

You Love Me? (100 words) (Rating: G) (Destiel)

Tags: POV!Dean, Angst, Requited Love Summary: 100 word drabble for the Ficwip prompt "something you don't mean."

Destel Chaptered:

From Perdition: Carnivore (44,868 words) (Rating: M) (Destiel)

Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, rape/non-con (not explicit and not Dean/Cas...Dean goes through a lot in Hell) Tags: emotional hurt/comfort, canon compliant, desitel hell rescue, BAMF!Cas, BAMF!Dean, whump, angst with a hopeful ending Summary: Sometimes, something beautiful pierces the blackness. Sometimes, an angel comes along with power in his eyes and lightning in his wings and grace in his hands, and he makes you remember that the universe has wonder in it. Sometimes, he sings over you until you remember how to take comfort in it. Sometimes, he flies you through the stars until you think that it might be okay to exist again as part of it. Sometimes, good things do happen. This story is about Dean’s time in Hell and Castiel’s battle to save him. Long story short: Dean is amazing, Castiel is one bamf, Alastair is horrifying, and in the end, half the battle is convincing Dean that he deserves to be saved.

From Perdition: Gripped Tight (38,297 words, wip) (rating: M) (Destiel)

Tags: major character death (temporary, this is an Empty rescue fic), canon divergent, angst with a happy ending Summary: Castiel once gripped Dean tight to raise him from perdition...now, Dean's gonna return the favor.

From Perdition: With My Bones (1,896 words, wip) (Rating: M) (Destiel, Anna/Ruby, Midam)

Tags: Canon Complaint thru 14x08, Canon-Typical Violence, Memory Loss, Angst, Pining Summary: Angels aren't created to want. So, how does one survive learning to, figuring out exactly what they want, holding it in their arms, then being forced to give it away? The answer: barely. He barely survives it.

Ocean's Brawl (54,568 words) (Rating: M) (Destiel, Donna/Jody, Claire/Kaia, Bobby/Ellen, brief Charlie/Gilda, mentioned Andrea/Benny)

Tags: pirate au, enemies to friends to lovers, pirate!Dean, naval officer!Cas, slowish burn, openly bisexual Dean, swashbuckling, pub songs/shanties, naval battles, historical themes, lgbtq+ themes, idiots to lovers, angst, fluff, character injury, hurt/comfort, canon typical violence, slavery, racism, drinking Summary: In a time of oppression, the Winchester brothers and their family of misfit pirates sail the seas attacking slave traders and offering the liberated passage to safe-havens, or–if they choose it–a home on the Impala as part of Team Free Will. Dean meets Castiel, a Naval Captain with orders to enlist him and his band of honorable sea rovers as privateers. Dean refuses, but they end up working together when Castiel offers his vessel as transport for some rescued slaves. Castiel, in turn, travels with Dean as collateral to ensure there is no foul play. Along the way, Castiel witnesses the horrors of slavery and begins to doubt his cause. He comes to admire this wild crew and their kind hearts…perhaps falling for one man in particular.

To End Up With You (20,751 words) (Destiel, Saileen, Garth/Bess, Kaia/Claire, Donna/Jody, Dean x Sam)

Tags: Fix-It, Fluff, Castiel Out of the Empty, Love Confessions, Domestic Fluff, The Bunker Is Full Like It Should Be, Canon-Typical Violence, The Rebar/Rusty Nail (you're gonna have to trust me on this one our boy is fine I promise), Happy Ending, Nothing Hurts, Weddings, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode Fix-It: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, Episode Fix-It: s15e20, Carry On, Post-Canon Summary: Okay, but what if Dean actually rescued Cas and DIDN'T die on some rusty rebar…

Too Damn Long (4,313 words) (Rating: M) (Destiel)

Tags: 13x05 coda, angst, fluff, love confessions, implied sexual content, canon-verse Summary: Coda to Cas's return from the Empty

What the Water Gave Me (20,574 words) (Rating: T) (Destiel, Claire/Kaia)

Tags: fantasy au, god/fae!Cas, protective Dean Winchester, hurt/comfort, pining, mutual pining, ALL the pining, angst with a happy ending, fluff, angst with a happy ending Summary: Dean meets Castiel in the woods and spends a long time wondering if he's some sort of vision or dream...until Castiel gets hurt. Dean saves him, falls in love with him, and is convinced there's no way this otherworldly child of the ocean and sky could feel the same for him. Of course...he's wrong.

Spn WLW Fic:

From Perdition: She Keeps Me Warm (8,984 words, wip) (Rating: T) (Anna/Ruby)

Tags: pre-canon, canon compliant, 1600s period fic (at first anyway…), human!Ruby, angst, fluff, Summary: Angels don't disobey, don't rebel. It's their murder one. But, sometimes, you just…fall. And Anna falls in more ways than one.

She's Nice (682 words) (Rating: T) (Anna/Ruby)

Tags: canon divergent, 4x09 coda Summary: Anna and her words get stuck in Ruby's head in a way that she can't shake…so she doesn't.

Spn (non-destiel) MLM Fic:

A Howl at That Moon: Bring You Back (604 words) (Rating: T) (Drowley)

Tags: 9x23 coda, canon compliant Summary: The truth was, Crowley had simply developed a bloody soft spot for one flannel-wearing, denim-clad nightmare...and he couldn't help but be excited to show Dean the world through his eyes.

A Howl at That Moon: "Hello, Boys." (402 words) (Rating: M) (Drowley)

Tags: demon!Dean, implied sexual content (no actual sexual content this is just flirting in the bar and Crowley trying to pretend he doesn't have a Dean-shaped problem) Summary: "We've howled, we've bayed, we've done extraordinary things to triplets..."

A Howl at That Moon: You And I Go Hard (1,294 words) (Rating: M) (Drowley)

Tags: demon!Dean, angst, non-explicit sexual content Summary: Crowley confronts Dean. Dean pushes back. Crowley tries to put him in his place. Things escalate. Turns out, Crowley can't help but give Dean everything he has.

A Howl at That Moon: You And I Go Hard (1,294 words) (Rating: M) (Drowley)

Tags: 12x23, Angst With a Happy Ending, Pining, Temporary Character Death Summary: Crowley deserved to be loved.

From This Dark Room (1,287 words, wip) (Rating: T) (Dean/Gabriel)

Tags: pre-canon, emotional hurt/comfort Summary: When Sam leaves for Stanford, Dean is lost. Luckily, a certain trickster is there to pull him out of his downward spiral...or...that one where Gabriel can't help but temporarily come out of hiding to help Dean.

Gabriel (306) (Rating: M) (Sabriel)

Tags: non-explicit sexual content, fluff Summary: Sam is in awe of what he holds in his arms

Honey, There Is No "Right" Way (10,181 words) (Rating: T) (Calthazar, past Cas/Dean, past Balthazar/Hannah)

Tags: Roommates!au, Ace!Cas, Aro!Balthazar, Demiromanantic!Cas, Demisexual!Balthazar, queer themes, internalized ace/arophobia, fluff, angst, emotional hurt/comfort, hurt/comfort, Domestic Fluff, Sick Character, best friends, friends to lovers, Happy Ending Summary: “That’s not how you feel about her.” “Castiel, that’s not how I’ve ever felt about anyone. This whole…” He waved a hand in the air and propped up against the arm of the couch, “in love business...it’s complete bollocks. If you ask me, people’ve just seen too many blasted movies, got so hopped up on the rush of getting to know someone that they think that's it, that’s love, but it isn’t. Love is…” He glanced down at Castiel. “Love is choosing the person you get on with best, someone you’re able to be mates with and that you find attractive. All this ‘romance’ rubbish is just propaganda.” Castiel looked at his friend. He thought about the warm feeling that grew inside him when they were together, the way his heart beat just a little faster every time Balthazar was close. “Yes...maybe you’re right.”

Spn M/F Fic:

Absolutely Not (1916 words) (Rating: T) (Meg/Gabriel)

Tags: college au, idiots in love, crack that became plot Summary: Meg and Gabriel go to the same university. He is openly obsessed. She pretends to find it annoying but actually adores him. (Inspired by and talked out with@moderatelypanickedbiromantic)

Not As Intended (3454 words) (Rating: T) (Sam X Gabriel, Debriel, alluded to Sastiel)

Tags: fake dating, college au, fake dating but instead of falling in love...they find out the kinda can't stand each other Summary: Sam brings Gabriel home from Stanford in hopes of pissing off his super conservative/homophobic family, but they all actually LOVE him instead. Dean...maybe likes Gabe a little too much...

The Luckiest (630 words) (Rating: T) (Gabriel/Rowena)

Tags: Schmoop, Canon Divergence, Cuddling, Gabriel’s a little obsessed with Rowena’s hair, and just smitten in general, she adores him too Summary: Just a bunch of cuddling and softness for two characters who deserved/needed more of it

#masterlist #rauko arts #rauko writes #destiel #destiel fic #spn femslash #spn rare pairs #anna/ruby #megriel #dodio #calthazar #debriel #sabriel #rachel miner #spn art #supernatural #venom #symbrock #veddie

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seeminglydark · 2 years ago

Note

hey, just thought I'd drop by and let you know that I love your art and comics, they're very cool :)

like many people I suspect, I found your work through the detention fanart (love the detail on the docs and john's patch pants). I don't know if I want to be john or date john (the answer is both). loved the detail of john's killer klowns poster too!

presumably since so many of your characters are punk, you are too. if so do you have any music recommendations?

thanks for reading :)

Hello! I'm so glad to hear that!

ahah yeah i never expected that piece to blow up like it did, im super grateful about it, it was definitely an experiment in style so im glad people like it so much and found my comics and stuff through it. (its not technically fanart though, i am raptorjules, the artist of the detention piece and creator of the comics and characters in it, though its so different than my usual and ofc i posted under this tumblr handle so i know a lot of people don't realize we are the same person!) also re: john, SAME friend. john is kind of a self portrait of a person i could have been when i was younger, if that makes sense, had i decided back then to fully transition. im really happy that people like him so much, he means so so much to me!

hahaha you got me, I was a teenager in the early to mid 90's, i listen to all things these days and punk is SUCH A BROAD GENRE and i tend to lean toward ska punk or folk punk more than crust or hardcore these days, but lets see, i'll give you some rec's of bands that inspire my art and ofc john in general. also you can head over to youtube, under raptorjules, and there should be a playlist called Johnny's Music that goes along with the song rec's on the Creaky arc in my comic Seemingly Dark, if you liked those songs!

So for more modern punk music, i love anything by The Interrupters (ska punk forever plz,) and Dog Park Dissidents for some queer punk (especially their toxic cover, fight me.) And Skatune Network for more wonderfully queer ska/skapunk.

In high school at the height of my Outwardly Studded and Spiked Punk Days i listened to a lot of Rancid (specifically the Life Won't Wait album) Descendants, Social Distortion, the Violent Femmes (the live Add it Up album if you can find it is the best one imo) Jugheads Revenge (Image is Everything album), Wizo (german queercore punk, i like the Herrenhandtasche album.) pretty much anything by The Mountain Goats, and finally, The Bouncing Souls are my all time favorite band, punk or not, any album, but the Hopeless Romantic album inspired so many of my stories and pieces plus its great driving music!

and ofc Johns theme song is Social Distortions Story of My Life. idk if this helps, ive never thought my music taste was terribly interesting or good, but i listen to what i like and what inspires me.

thanks for reading and reaching out! and id love some music recs from anyone who would like to leave them in the comments or hashtags, especially music that reminds you of my art or stories, punk or not!

-rj

#rj rambles #ask me things!#music recs #i love asks yall for real #always fun to age myself in these things ahahahaha

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findusinaweek · 2 years ago

Note

Fandom ask game: 4, 6, 16?

Oh! Hi! 4) Mmm. Attack On Titan, off and on. I think any large fandom kinda just sucks to be in through. I'm not really in the fandom. More like hanging off the edge asking "May I please see Ymir and Erwin?".

Fruits Basket fandom in 2007?-2013 as an Akito roleplayer because Akito is a terrible person. I can't deny that. So everyone expects you to roleplay them in their worst moments. But I was more interested in the religious/familial hierarchy roles they fulfill and the gender fuckery from the manga. And most other people in the fandom circles I was in were there from the anime. So...not only was I roleplaying from a different gender, I was roleplaying with entirely different motivations than the others and it made everything rather annoying. I hated their favorite characters and they hated mine (which is fair, Akito and Shigure are terrible people that are meant for each other.). Honestly, anime fandoms in general have been pretty awful. And that brief trip into Homestuck. Oh yeah. The Borderlands fandom. I love more terrible people in those games.

6) The Locked Tomb because it has very visually appealing fanart and everyone keeps selling me on it. But I don't have the mental energy to finish a book.

I'm playing both Disco Elysium and Hades but they are very hard for me to get into gameplay wise. I really like the fandoms though. So I need to actually play the games.

Barbarians but I don't have the energy for subtitles either. I'm just full of mental blocks lately, but things are getting better.

16) Ok, here are some things I'd like to do:

I want to make a smutty Alexidas comic? series of pictures? to this song. I've had it planned out for months. I have the...references. I have time.

On the same note I want to do a comic of Deimos! Alexios and his...child self? to this song. I think it'd be healing?

I want to write the Eruri modern au/record shop au fic that I made a playlist for in 2018.

I want to make a series of Kassandra pictures in AUs.

I want to make a lithograph of Brasidas.

I want to singlehandedly make a sequel to Dream Daddy but it's just a Mary Christiansen and maybe Val but I've already dated a Val and that went badly dating sim. You can date her and she leaves Joseph for you. You live the rest of your days in a happy group with Amanda and Mary's terrifying children and Robert visits often and gets in recovery for alcoholism.

Uh. I want to write a lot more weird little fics for AC Odyssey and apparently they will all have to do with hair.

I want to finish my WIPs.

I want to start the planned depressing yet wholesome Steddie Christmas/holiday fics I had dreamed up.

I want to make some filthy Borderlands stuff. Idk what kinda stuff. I haven't thought that far. Just. Some stuff. Should exist.

I want to make a massive oil painting portrait of Eliot Waugh from the Magicians. Also one of Brasidas. Also one of Kassandra. Also one of Erwin Smith. Also one of Anna Karenina. Also one of...ok my teenage dreams were oil portraitist so that's just...a thing I want to do.

I want to learn how to sew really well and recreate every outfit Villanelle ever wears in Killing Eve.

I want to learn the shanties in AC Odyssey and record myself doing every voice so I can just do harmony with myself.

I want to write a fic to go along with the Alexidas pieta to explain how I feel about Alexios grieving.

I have a lot of dreams.

#Ask game #thanks aeide!#sorry I got carried away

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numericalbridge · 4 months ago

Text

TOH rewatch semi-liveblog. Season 2b part 2

episodes 16-21 + season 2b thoughts

Episode 16

- One of the most solid episodes writing-wise, and it makes the best out of the shortened time, but it just doesn't impress me as much as it seems to impress others.

- The episode starting right in Belos' mind and then using flashbacks is so funny. I think it was a neat way to utilize the limited time, but I wonder whether there would've been a bigger build up without the shortening.

- haha, remember when people thought this was Alador, not Darius, because "Darius is just awful"?

I mean, makes perfect sense that an 8 year old should be able to see through the disguises, but not certain fandom adults.

- But, please note that Darius's and Raine's cloaks are normal, but Eber's is torn (or, Eber's cloak is normal and worn because it's well-used, and Darius and Raine are city slickers who had to buy theirs for this).

- Also Darius's hand is clearly still enlarged and distorted even after most of the abomination that surrounded it had disappeared. Kinda gross.

- I wish we saw their outfits without the cloaks because Darius's looks so nice.

- Also, i like how the three of them were working their coven magic together to make the spell, it's neat:

(i headcanon that they'd figured out for themselves how they can 'combine'/'mix' their magic types to make more complicated 'wild magic' spells work, a bit like mutant technology in some xmen comics)

- The way the public of the Boiling Isles is portrayed in toh, including the public reaction to Eda and to Belos' propaganda is kinda... i think it's fine for the target audience and there are some realistic and to the point aspects... just something bugs me about the way the population is presented buying into the propaganda in such an open, cartoonish way (which works only in comedic quick scenes), but at the same time, at the end they are absolved of the harmful ideology they've supported because they were 'tricked', and there is little focus on the wild witches other than Eda who are hurt the most by them.

And in regards of Eda - the shift in public's opinion between s1 finale when they were willing to save her and it was presented as an uplifting moment of change, and s2 isn't well explained. Even though i can see how it could work (we even see a bit of something similar in this episode with the seamstress who got the sigil), it still feels like there should've been a way to show the shift clearly, instead it feels like what happened in s1 finale just doesn't get acknowledged.

At the same time Eda's position as an outcast in a way gets 'softened' or pushed aside near the end of the show, just because she had opened up to those close to her, and the focus is moved to more 'external' stuff like figuring out Belos's plans and saving Raine. It just feels like a part of Eda's arc is missing from the latter half of s2.

And yes, i think it is noticable how the most proactive she gets is when she and Raine try to murder Darius (and Eber), but they never make such moves against anyone else.

- Luz and King's scene with the walkie-talkie is cute.

- haha, remember when people were saying that Luz is just as bad as Belos because she tackled Hunter to the ground and wanted to get intel out of him (to literally save the Isles)?

- though shouting Golden Guard's name in front of the mysterious cloaked figures may have not been very wise.

- But how did they manage to forget the potion?😭 I wish the rebels had more victories and were shown to be clearly competent.

- Darius clutching his cloak x3 (in the portrait)

- I can't believe i liked/was intrigued by (yet unnamed) 'Caleb' and 'Evelyn' after first watching this and seeing posts with the memory scape portraits. Now they are easily the least favourite characters, all thanks to the fandom.

- I can't quite word it right, but even starting with Hunting Palismen i always thought Hunter was much more 'self-aware'(?) about his situation and relationship with Belos than his fanon version. I don't think he was ever as oblivious to Belos's misdeeds as the fandom makes him to be, that's why in Hunting Palismen he immediately told Flapjack that Flapjack shouldn't be there and looked sad. I always interpreted it as Hunter knowing at least somewhat when Belos is unfair and cruel, but feeling that he is in debt because Belos had saved him and excusing Belos's actions with the good intentions and higher purpose, and not allowing himself to conciously doubt his own family, and especially not in front of others. I always read him as having some, if not doubts, then sadness and bitterness since the beginning.

- Collector was so much more interesting like this, and i think it would have been more poignant if this was an actually difficult pre-teen with an actual cruel streak due to isolation and Belos' influence, who still would get sympathy and help. Rather than the easy way of making him not understand when he is hurting someone (while still adding a huge amount of unfortunate implications with the puppet plot).

- edit: Somehow forgot to add this, but Belos pretending to be a kid is both creepy and so deeply pathetic. And it's a really interesting angle for the villain.

- hahaha, remember when people thought that because Hunter asked about what Belos did to other guards, "their family" it meant that in ASIAS Darius was cruelly mocking Hunter's family's death???? Because obviously not just Hunter already knew in ASIAS, but Darius too, and it makes perfect sense for Darius to mock his beloved mentor's death /sarcasm.

(Meanwhile, i always heard it as separate categories - 'golden guards' + 'family that might or might not include the golden guards')

- Luz feeling that bad over helping Philip always felt a little forced/over the top beating her up with guilt. I think especially the way the show tries to connect her guilt to the feeling that she is just like him seems rather awkward narratively? I feel like there were other, more biting things that Belos could've used against her - for example more emphasis on treating the Isles as her fantasy land or abandoning her human family - that would make more sense for her guilt, in addition to helping Philip. And i think there were better ways to explore their similarities too, whether real or pure product of Belos's manipulation.

But I do wonder whether there would've been more without the shortening, especially if HM was meant to be a season finale since then it likely would've been a final part of a two-part story. For example, if Luz actually saw memories of Philip as a kid and discovered their similarities this way and was afraid of growing up to be like him.

Episode 17

- Another episode i kinda skimmed through on the first watch, even though i like King's development.

- Lilith's arrival and the kids' departure are so quick, lol. This is the kind of thing i excuse with the shortening, but it's so fast paced. And the adults just send the kids off with only Hooty for protection - ok, it's a cartoon, but still funny. (I used to like the theory that Lilith was contacted by the rebels behind the scenes, and they made her keep it a secret but warned her about the scouts planning to raid the Owl House, and so she just had to get the kids out as quickly as she could).

- Sorry, but the frst time i watched it i LoL-ed for real when Eda's and Lilith's hug happened, because of how fast the pacing was. Even though i always wanted to see something like a hug or Lilith comforting Eda.

- Tbh i don't have much to say about the main plot, it is just there, for me it is rather boring. I found this to be a rather meh episode.

Episode 18

- Now, this opening, with Gus's backstory, the beginning of Gus's and Willow's friendship, is so good! And almost always when Gus and Willow are allowed to have their moments it's great, meanwhile half of Amity's scenes fall flat for me.

- Amity's and Willow's plot is just weird. It doesn't follow the Coven Parade well at all. It seems like a subplot that would work after a bigger problem between the two was resolved. It feels like something that wasn't adjusted well for the shortening (or at least i hope so because otherwise it's just bad writing of the arc).

- The Illusion teacher had really missed all the Graye's huge illusions, lol. Realistic for a school teacher, i guess.

- I like most of the episode better than HM actually. I wish Gus's problems were not so focused on helping Hunter in the middle of the episode, or alternatively Hunter got his resolution earlier so when he was comforting Gus at the end it wasn't again focused so much on him (Hunter). The double focus would've been fine on its own, but Gus already barely has any episodes.

- And the pacing of Willow's and Amity's subplot is also weird because in the beginning it feels like it is leading to something relatively big, at least a real conversation, but then the resolution is two quick lines while the real focus is on Hunter.

- Ok, i wanted to joke how Graye would make more sense as someone who would use AI-analogue illusions (rather than Alador and abominations), because he would be happy to replace his staff, but i admit i was wrong: i think Graye needs his staff to feel superior to them and give them directions, lol. I think he would be the type who opposes generative AI solely because it's not 'true art' while exploiting his own underlings and wasting resources in unethical ways on some superficial crap.

- Oh, but feeling tricked, feeling 'dumb' for being trusting - all are things that would connect Gus and Luz... but, of course nothing is done with it!

- idk why fandom headcanons Severine as one of the good scouts when the girlboss had no problems with tricking and branding kids and only quited because of her own mistreatment.

- Amity and Willow holding hands is cute, but it would've worked better if it happened after a proper development.

- There is definitely an aftermath of this episode missing. It is latter said they were supposed to be in hiding - but that's a whole school of students, teachers and their families? The school rebelling like this should be something big, even if only some students participated. Such a shame, and i feel like the next two episodes could've fit a slightly bigger explanation.

- But still, this is one of the strongest episodes overall.

Episode 19

- Eda's and Lilith's moments in the beginning were good at last.

- Idk, the way Lilith's s2b arc works is weird. This episode was the perfect opportunity to semi-seriously examine her worldview and finish her arc on a strong note instead of whatever this was.

- The moment of Eda lying to keep Luz safe is good.

- Why does Steve get more serious development in this episode than Lilith - one of the core characters, and gets a scene to explain his personality and motives but Darius doesn't? Such an odd choice to prioritize Steve over more established characters. He could've easily just popped up in the end to recruit Lilith and King, already being a part of the rebellion without much explanation, and it would've been acceptable (they could've even added a scene of him getting contacted by the 'mysterious' rebel figures in ASIAS). Or Lilith could've just gone on the montage journey with Steve and King, so Steve would still get a spotlight.

- I don't remember if Lilith ever used Titan's name 'in vain' before or after this episode or it's just a joke for King's subplot. But considering the way Darius uses PG-rated Titan-related swears a couple of times, it is still funny to imagine him sometimes using the Titan's name in vain like that in the Castle or back at school specifically to annoy her.

- Raine is so harsh when talking to the Captain on the phone. Ok, yes, i really like their s2b characterization.

- Probably another case of me not being the target audience, but i never felt much about Luz vs Eda fight except 'cool action, i suppose'. I think their scene in the cells is much more moving, and the vocie acting is great.

- Meanwhile Lilith's arc in this episode basically concludes with a throw away line.

- The whole ending starting with Eda being taken away, and Luz freaking out in the carriage is so good. One of my favourite parts of the whole show, everyone is so good.

- Love how Eber frees Luz and then just fucks off for the rest of the episode. I headcanon he was rescuing the echo mouse, and also didn't want to witness any mushy reunions, but the real reason is probably that he wasn't there in the pre-shortening plans.

- I'll make a separate post about Darius and Raine in this episode, but the way Darius's voice is so much softer than in any other moment when he talks about Raine here:

- Their scene is my second favourite Darius scene, and one of my favourite scenes in the whole show, it was honestly what made me continue watching.

Sigh, but then neither the canon nor fandom does anything with them /suffering.

- The ending part of the episode is so, so strong, and overall a good episode except Lilith's 'arc' that is just baffling to me, considering there is no time to dedicate to her after this.

- 🥺:

Episode 20

- i admit. it is not as horrible on the rewatch as when i first watched it.

- The opening with Belos and Collector is so good!

- Why was Kikimora even demoted? Odalia trying to butter her up and sell her the robot was fun.

- Odalia just starts threatening Alador with their kids' future like that, without any subtlety.

- Tbh, Alador's and Odalia's writing in this episode reminds me of Stephen King. What the heck you are talking about, numericalbridge? you might ask. Well, while some of his better/more well known books have more varied dynamics, i've read a lot of his books as a teenager (it was a love-to-hate-you relationship from the start), and there is a very specific recurring dynamic where the mother of a character is shrill, not understanding, pushy, toxic or unhealthy (sometimes there is more nuance, and she might or might not be redeemable), while the father is more understanding, loving, warm and down to earth (he might be alive or he might be deceased and exists as a memory). It is very same-y between different stories too, and after a second one you can see how it feels very forced and on the nose and it is empty of real character depth; and there are narrative short cuts to make you dislike, or at least reproach, the mom and feel for the dad. And you can see that even if in-universe the mother's parenting is bad and she is not a good person, her character is still written using misogynistic tropes. Well, that's how this episode feels too.

- The war table scene is fun. I like how harsh Raine can be, while also feeling guilty over Eda.

- I know it is not intentional, but the way Darius's plan didn't involve giving Eda the sigil, compared to Raine's 'proper' plan? It works so well for both of their characters and the narrative potential there is just so...

- Sigh, why there is so much discourse over Darius's comment about only the small ones getting eaten when those people put sapient fairies in the pies, and in the previous episode Lilith was ready to perform dark deeds for King's sake. Tbh i wish this scene wasn't included, and they instead squeezed in some more backstory for Darius.

- But some art looks so wonky in the first third of the episode. I am supposed to be watching a touchy-feely found family balcony scene, yet Eda's off-model face is distracting me.

- Something about the scene between Luz and Raine always bugged me. And Raine really doesn't even try to talk to King, lol.

- I like the scene when Katya is, like, "Darius insisted, bye!" - i wish we saw a bit of that. Between this scene and Hunter mentioning that Darius 'ordered' him to protect Luz, i like that it paints Darius as an active character who participates in the plot behind the scenes even without us seeing the interactions.

- I like the scene itself, but Luz getting all teary eyed when reuniting with Gus and Willow and their hug really ring hollow because of how little they were allowed to interact. And even if there was no time for anything big they could've still included small, even background moments, like they manage with Darius. Hunter's scene is fine though.

- Yeah, you could've went on a real date during ASIAS if you didn't waste time on the Azura subplot /j

- And all the wonky art just to save money for the uncanny crisp kiss animation that looks distractingly out of place.

- Collector's voice acting is good, and he is still so much more interesting to me if he is a difficult kid.

- Odalia just doesn't make sense. If she is supposed to know that the Draining Spell will kill 90% of the population, then who would be her royal subjects? She knows her husband will die, but Amity doesn't react to that bit? It's just cartoony in a bad way. It would've made more sense if Odalia thought the draining spell would simply depower everyone else so her family could rule them, and refused to believe anyone who told her otherwise.

- Hate the switch when 'Luz' saves Willow, but oh, no, it's actually Hunter! When i was watching it the first time i was actually excited for a brief moment because Luz and Willow were caring about each! But of course, saving Willow is just a hint it's not Luz /bitter.

And this has nothing to do with ships, btw - i feel like i need to mention this since fans who are agressively against huntl*ow annoy me because they try to shift all the writing problems to the mostly background ship when the neglect of Luz's and Willow's friendship has started literally in season 1.

- And Gus does so much for Luz and Hunter in this episode, and the switch and Luz getting captured should be traumatizing for him? But it is never adressed, no one comforts him?

- Ok, Alador saving King was cute, i guess.

- But the Blights treating Willow horribly just never factors in anything. At the end that really was just a throw away scene in s1 for the sake of Amity's backstory.

- Ok, the episode is not as bad as i remembered. I think on the first watch the focus on the Blights and the poor quality of writing of Alador vs Odalia really gave a bad impression, and made me worry how the rest of the show would be written, to the point that i didn't even want to watch the finale. But it's mostly fine on the rewatch (well, the Blight writing is still not good, and the way Willow and Gus are handled is a problem across the whole show rather than a single episode thing).

Episode 21

- My favourite episode. Probably one of the two or three episodes that i like start to finish with only some minor nitpicks. And it holds so well on the rewatch!

- To be honest i don't have much to say about it because it is so good.

- But Alador really did 0 work while Willow had to act mature - and yes, it's the point with her, but come on.

- Eda's and Lilith's (and Hooty's), and Eda's and Raine's goodbyes? Good. The moment Eda imagines her past friend-group&Bump? Good, if off-model.

- I think there is definitley a hint of some plan B or backup with the way the Batts are disguised as scouts.

- The start of the ceremony? The public reactions through out the episode? Great.

- I really like this demon design:

- Belos's shit-eating grin when he declares he switched the Coven Head arrangements? His 'Goodbye, Boiling Isles'? Great. Belos being absolutely horrible with Collector and Kikimora? Also great.

- Why were Raine, Lilith, Hooty and the rest of the rebels taken out so easily though.

- The whole draining spell scene? The Coven Head fight, the music, etc - Awesome.

But i want to point out again, that Darius didn't know that Raine and the rest were captured when he gave up for Eber. And Raine shouldn't even be there - but does fandom call them selfish for going to the ceremony, like with Darius? And the way Darius laments that they (the rebels) were too late - only makes sense if he does care about saving the whole Isles instead of actively choosing Eber over everyone and giving up.

- Meanwhile, there is something with the way Eda mostly cares about Raine during the ceremony that i don't like on the rewatch, knowing how s3 goes. I am glad that at least when Raine saves Eda it is framed as the promise made to Luz, but still, s3 soured me on rae*da so much.

- Belos vs Luz? Cool. Luz tricking Belos like that with the glove? One of my favourite scenes.

- Poor King, getting his skull cracked. The montage through his eyes is cool too.

- Kikimora's arc really could've ended ambigiously in this episode with her helping King as her payback to Belos. There was no real reason to turn her into a threat in s3.

- Again it is easy to see how Gus could be traumatized or at least hurt by Belos's memories, but it doesn't matter to the writers. Fandom also tries to excuse Gus's lack of focus in s3 with 'his arc had ended in LR' but 1. he already had less focus than others, ever since s1, so ending his arc so early isn't a good choice 2. between the switch with Hunter and Luz that caused Luz to be caught and Belos's memories, the show unintentionally adds more to his arc that is left unexamined. And somehow there was time in s3 for Kikimora and Bosha.

- Actually i've initially assumed that not all 'failures' in the pit were the Golden Guards. And i still headcanon to myself that the huge ammount of bodies is there because there were others who tried to see what is in the Titan's head and got caught or those are people who got close to Golden Guards, or maybe one of the golden guards made a failed attempt at a full rebellion.

- The Collector's out-of-the-disc design is still disappointing when some of the concept art had really interesting designs (the one where he is a little 'cloud' thing inside his humanoid head!). It's not even that toh couldn't include those designs because they are not reliable enough for the kids when King has a 'scary-cute' monster design, and he is reliable.

- The ending? The freed Collector getting rid of Belos, the kids' escape, Gus crying, Camila gasping when Luz returns? Also great.

----

Conclusion:

This is hands down the strongest part of the series for me and features some of my favourite moments of the show. This live-blog is probably shorter than the previous ones because i was actually caught up in the story.

Despite the shortening or maybe thanks to the shortening, writing-wise this part is strong, especially the finale, although there is definitely a feeling that something is missing and the pacing is too quick. It feels like a part of Eda's arc is omitted, and it's unfortunate that the aftermath of the LR is also clealry missing, but as usual it's the unfair treatment of Gus and Willow and the over-focus on the white characters, like the badly written Blight divorce, that are the main negative things about this part of the season, plus Lilith's plot in Oh, Titan is baffling. I was worried about Hunter taking over the plot, but he is mostly all right at this point, although there are bits here and there where he is unfairly prioritized over other characters. But i feel like Luz's arc might be a bit out-of-focus or strangely paced in this part, despite including some important moments.

Season 2b thoughts:

This is my favourite part of the series. Yes, partly it's because it features Darius, but it is also overall pretty strong writing-wise, especially compared to season 2a, and has some really interesting moments and utilizes the limited time well (with some notable exceptions).

And I do wonder whether the shortening had actually helped to tidy the plot and character arcs up, and whether with full 3 seasons the show would've been just meandering and still had the same flaws. Anyway, unfortunately even though Willow and Gus had some good moments in s2b, they are still often sidelined. And there is definitely a problem of using minor antagonists of color to make white characters look better.

And then certain choices are just baffling - the Azura book subplot that just wastes time that could've gone to Willow and others, Steve prioritized over more established characters, Odalia being so cartoonishly evil.

So, yeah, while this is my favourite part of the show it is far from perfect, and on the first watch there were several times when i thought about giving it up because i just couldn't trust the writers, but then there were times when i was very pleasantly surprised too.

And the finale is very strong and enjoyable, and on the first watch it really left me excited for season 3.

Best episode: 21 (King's Tide, also the favourite episode of the whole show)

Worst episode: 17, surprisingly (it's just very meh and not interesting to me, but it is not as bad as my least favourite episodes from other parts of the show), but parts of episodes 12 and 15 are worse.

#toh rewatch numericalbridge #toh rewatch liveblog #the owl house #long post

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thetremblingroofbeam · 1 year ago

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A Month of Watching Horror: Oct 2022

-Writing began in Nov but was never finished. presented here is an unfinished retelling of a period of severe dissociation.

It’s October second and i’m disassociating. the last year had entirely upended my life, and i was grasping for something to anchor myself around. the algorithm brought to me an idea, “31 Horror Films in October” and, determined to catch up, i embarked on a journey into a genre i don’t normally enjoy.

it starts in August. in the same week i get a new job, one that won’t be so hard on my recovering spine, and two days later my partner of 10.5 years breaks up with me while we’re walking our dogs. i go see Nope, my first movie in a theater alone in over 12 years. i think it has too many scenes, that they undercut each other, that they fail to fully coalesce. i really like it.

it’s Oct 2nd at 11pm. i put on Blade. she’s finally moving out, mostly, not really at all. i need something comforting and familiar to fill the empty space. i laugh my ass off at every fourth wall break, every wink, every exaggerated line. i love this movie, it’s one of my favorites.

i’m alternating between reorganizing what little hasn’t been taken and moving a new roommate in. i it’s all too expensive, and i’m exhausted. i’ve started a list of movies, comics, and games i think i want to check out. i see The Crow. i hadn’t watched that since i pivoted from hardcore to darkwave. it’s fine. i find it’s meditation on death/rebirth terribly ironic and crass.

one of the last shows we had started was The Sandman. i did not like it. i go back and reread the first volume. i read to 24 Hour Diner. what a brilliant and cruel piece of fiction. i empathize with the hurt, but find it’s shock fairly hollow. a theme i will discover.

i put on The Purge. my home, hollowed, emptied, a stark contrast to the invasion on screen. i eat orange chicken in bed and marvel at how weirdly accurate the political commentary is, how sharp it sees the rise of the fascist youth movement, and how it absolutely fumbles the way race is weaponized. a truly neoliberal film. i’m reminded of her recent descent into orientalism and how gross it is.

the house feels wrong. the dogs aren’t around. time is collapsing. Bruce Willis stews in a basement, unaware he’s a ghost, pining for his wife, two portraits of grief in tragedy, but also very campy and too focused on being witty. i don’t love The 6th Sense.

i need to move back in time. i need a classic. The Omen delivers. what a score. i’m fully distracted from my self for a few hours. reality hits like a brick when i go to text her how great it is.

hoping to find something with the spark of District 9 or Chappie, i put on Demonic. it’s bad.

it’s late 2021 i think. the pain in my back has caused time to dilate, i don’t remember it very well. i see a panel someone has posted from a manga called “Chainsaw Man.” i immediately read all of it. it’s September 2022, i start rereading it to prepare for the show airing. i love the journey of hard head Denji through this weird world of devils, hormones, and tragedy. i read it, and read it again. i love it.

i spent most of 2022 fighting the insurance company. they changed my team at the start of the year and suddenly i wasn’t getting any help. my back was slowly, finally getting better but they were closing the door on paying for the treatment. i didn’t have the energy to fight it and go back to work. Ilana spent most of the year inviting me to bars, knowing i couldn’t sit in the stools with my body in the shape it was in. it was the solidification of her neo-liberalism. a doomed solution offered is justification for failure. my new boss offers me one of her favorite Halloween classics, The Halloween tree. i watch it the same day as Chainsaw Man episode 1. it’s a very good day for animation. i start stretching on my own.

the list is almost solidified. i want to watch the “good stuff.” Rosemary’s Baby. i’m blown away. fuck you P*lanski, rot in hell. to the rest of that crew… you done damn did it. this movie lives rent free in my head.

i’m listening to a Stephen King podcast. i see Cronenberg did an adaptation of Dead Zone. i’m struck by how prescient it is, how it fears the radicalizing right, and the ways religion drives people to neurosis.

i’m inspired. Cronenberg Jr has a film about a scifi dystopian body jumping assassin. we have our first surprise banger, a movie that cuts straight into my grief and confusion and for a little while i watched something that helped me understand what was going on in my own head. i had put on a mask and fragmented myself and was fighting with every single breath to stay calm. the feeling of being fractured hasn’t left me.

we’re on fire, in a groove. i’m watching banger after banger and it’s so refreshing to experience. i briefly am feeling like there is a path forward. i move backwards in time and watch Vampyr. i am shocked at how much more experimental film was in its youth, and again reminded of how much i love a good camera.

this next one is hard. it’s a choke point. i’ve been fighting and fearing it for months now. how do i process this. how do i make this make sense. the last good memory.

we go to a double feature at a diy theater downtown. it’s my first time seeing Vampire Hunter D, which was an absolute mess of budget and writing. then we watch Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust, one of the best animated films of all time and one of my all time favorites. everything is like it’s normal. we joke about how weird things have been. my back hurts and i feel estranged.

i spend the next day in severe pain. we’re keeping vampires rolling. i love vampires. A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night is not what i was expecting it to be. really was hoping it would have a little more bite.

#mine #writing #horror

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auspicetaker · 1 year ago

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thoughts about art and myself as an entity that can create

lately i've been kicking myself for being too self-conscious, scared of vulnerability ,scared of being lame, scared of failure. my whole life. i wish that when i was younger i hadn't hated myself so much and relegated my entire creative being to only the most private of spheres. i feel like i squandered the time in my life when i had free time and resources and now i'm old and boring and i'll neeeveeerrr catch up.

i know this is self-defeating! the truth is, you can start doing a new thing anytime. you can start doing a new thing RIGHT NOW. it's hard and it takes effort and you have to fail a bunch but you literally can do it.

also i don't give myself enough credit like i literally was doing commissioned ink portraits of people in 2019 and they were pretty good! i got too many requests actually and got overwhelmed and had to refund people but i literally Can Draw Stuff! i have made some rly cool collages and even a few abortive attempts at comics (unquestionably the hardest thing to make, ever, wow), i used to write poetry and won Awards And Shit. i am completely capable of making things that are beautiful and that other people care about!

honestly the hardest part for me has always been that i don't actually have much of an imagination. like i'm not super generative, i tend to instead cobble existing things together, explore relationships/ draw connections between existing things, or mimic existing things. my whole life it's been "you can write good be a writer" and im like "i have not shit to write about at all, except for myself, whom i hate too much to focus on"

but like i can't live forever like this! i can't!

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friendlyneighborhooddolan · 3 years ago

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Little Wing

warnings: This story has some descriptive stuff. Age gap (7 years). Sexual and graphic things, alcohol and drug use.

pairing: Kylo Ren x reader

summary: Having a hot neighbor has its perks sometimes.

word count: 1033

Masterlist

Chapter one

He looked like Icarus. He looked like an absurd circumstance, a mess of muscles and ligaments that carries the world – self-induced mystery of destroyed portraits and broken glass. A system of imperfections and collapsed worlds, a system of purple galaxies that really looked like bruises. And yet – he walked like a soldier and thought of himself as king.

He was the guy she was crushing on ever since high school. Y/N knew it was wrong, she wasn’t stupid. Crushing on someone seven years older was frowned upon. Them being Kylo Ren, the hot neighbor that was always so eager to help, was even worse. She didn’t care.

She couldn’t bring herself to.

Y/N didn’t expect to see him this morning, just after her mother left the house.

She tried to mow the lawn, but when the lawnmower turned off for the sixth time in ten minutes, she was on the verge of crying.

“Need help there?” He called her name out across the street. Kylo has been watching her since the first time the lawnmower turned off, finding her clumsiness quite comical. The girl was huffing, her face red, sweat beading atop her eyebrows.

“Ren, hi! You would be of great help,” she answered, her hands resting on her hips. A soft smile etched itself on her face.

“Kylo would suffice,” he reminded her softly. A conversation they had many times, many more to come, it seemed.

The neighbor turned the goddamn machine on in a matter of seconds – something that took her ten minutes alone. Carefully holding the lever so it doesn’t turn off, he motioned to Y/N to come closer, to cut her own grass.

“Careful there, puddin’,” he laughed out, seeing her stumble over the cables. He softly put a hand on her lower back, as if to say “I’ll catch you if you fall.” Only then had he noticed her outfit – it wouldn’t be a problem if it was some other girl wearing it. Y/N was wearing tiny shorts and a top that was leaving little to the imagination. He could see she was wearing no bra. Her legs – miles of tan skin uncovered, and Kylo would’ve liked to think it was just for him. Sure, if it wasn’t for the heat burning their skin off.

She cleared her throat, getting ahold of the mower finally, and he was just behind her, guiding her slowly.

It was too intimate, Y/N was too close. He thought the air became even heavier. He could smell her, feel her supple skin. And yet, not close enough. He tried not to think about most neighborhood grandmas watching them.

That evening, Kylo was working in his office, when the doorbell rang. He shuffled over to the door.

“Good evening! I made you this peach pie to thank you for today.” A pie thrusted in front of him. A white sundress and white shoes and small hands and the smell of strawberries mixed with peach pie and an innocent smile and her her her. Always her.

“Oh, you didn’t need to,” her name falling from Kylo’s lips ever so gracefully, “Wanna come inside?”

It would be rude not to invite her in.

“Of course, Kylo,” fell from her cherry-colored lips. She said it so sweetly, it made Kylo Ren blush. It would be sweet if he wasn’t contemplating letting it all go to Hell and kissing her right then and there.

His house was tidy. Expensive furniture laid out nicely, cherry wood floors glistening under lights. His AC was on and Y/N was thankful she didn’t have to stand outside any minute longer. She would’ve melted – not sure if it would have been from the heat or Kylo’s gaze.

She sat herself on the leather couch, not welcoming the feeling on her bare legs, but she couldn’t complain.

He was in the kitchen, and she had a clear view of his broad back behind the kitchen island.

“Drink?” He asked as he was opening the fridge,”I have cherry soda.”

Kylo knew it was her favorite, and her face lit up like a Christmas tree when he held up the glass bottles.

They were talking about mundane things, the faint sound of some rock song coming from a recorder in his office. He looked at the girl sitting across the table.

If Kylo had two nickels to rub together, he would rub them together like a kid rubs his sticks together until the friction made combustion and they burned a hole in his pockets into which he would put his hand and then his arm – and eventually his whole self – he would fold himself into the hole in his pocket and disappear into the pocket of himself or at least his pants. But before he disappeared like some ancient star, he would grab her hand.

“You’re a great baker, Angel” he said, taking a sip of soda Y/N oh so favored.

She smiled, wiping her mouth with a napkin. She also hoped Kylo wouldn’t notice her blushing at the nickname.

She took a long look at her neighbor, now that he stood up to take empty plates back into the kitchen. He was tall, brooding, big. His nose was too big for his face and his lips looked so kissable and his black hair was all messy from him running his big, capable hands through it. When he smiled at her, Y/N thought she was going to die. There was just something so attractive about him. Too attractive. She knew it. The whole town knew it. She was witness to many women coming to his house late at night, only to leave in the morning. Everyone knew.

“Want another piece?”

“No, thank you, Kylo. I better get going.”

Hearing his name fall from her lips was so endearing. He wanted to hear it again again again. His name fit in her mouth better than her own ever has. Like she was born to speak it.

“I wish you wouldn’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” He looked confused.

“I don’t know,” she hesitated. “Like you could love me.”

And with that, she turned on her heel and left.

#kylo ren #kylo ren smut #kylo x you #kylo fanfic #kylo x reader #kylo ren angst #kylo ren fluff #kylo ren kiss #kylo ren x you #kylo ren x reader #ben solo #kylo ren au

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