#i got the libby app and i am

[ballroomnotoriety]

sionnach, confidently: cats forget their owners' faces in three days

literally six other people at once: says who?????

sionnach: dragon ball super

[varian-ross-horror-author]

@queerliblib I just got you added to my Libby app, and I am *delighted* and a little emotional at just how many audiobooks you have.

I'm visually impaired, and can't read text by itself for very long. So audio is the main way I read books now, and I'm finding books I've wanted to read but my Indiana state library card only had the text versions (if they had the books at all.)

[milkweedtussocktubers]

An Extensive "What Now?" List

So, I made a list. A very extensive "Trump Is President-Elect. What Now?" list. And it's fucking ten pages long and I know it's incomplete, because I am white, and multi-gender, and own my own home, and live in a blue state with enshrined abortion rights and so honestly can't know everything that needs to be on that list. BUT I'm posting what I've got so far. I'll also post the link, because it's a Google Doc that I'm continuously updating and sharing. PLEASE do not take my word as gospel - comment, add, share, spread, correct, message me. This is just a jumping off point, because so many of my friends wanted an action plan. All links except the What If Trump Wins? website are credited to @creature-wizard; they don't know it, but I read their posts and find their work very helpful, so I hope they don't mind that I included some of their links and info. Better than reinventing the wheel.

So THIS is the link:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/10zzAchLDd_NeqpWQXixmNQpH6X5ZsGpHRVsojx38Las/edit?tab=t.0

TRUMP IS PRESIDENT-ELECT. NOW WHAT?

I put together a list of ideas that I hope folks find inspiration in. This can be a personal action plan, a path towards resistance, or just an opportunity to feel a bit better. I welcome all thoughts, suggestions and changes. Please note that I am writing this from the perspective of a white, multi-gender farmer, and that will color and inhibit my ability to see certain issues or solutions. This is not a complete list, but can be a jumping-off point.

I've found this website incredibly helpful: https://whatiftrumpwins.org. All links found within this document are credited to @creature-wizard on Tumblr. 

COMMUNITY AND PUBLIC SERVICE 

Community ties are the most important things we’ve got - that’s where our strength lies. All those small-scale mutual aid projects? That’s what’s going to make life possible on the day to day. So: 

Take a deep breath, and knock on someone’s door. 

Check in with your neighbors - this can be a scheduled date, or just swinging by with an extra loaf of zucchini bread, or chatting over the garden fence. 

Offer to help someone with a simple task - cleaning gutters, building a raised bed, taking their dog to the vet.

Create a carpool system. 

Set up little libraries, freezers and fridges. 

Develop a list of ten local people you trust, with their contact information, and who you know will try to help you. Put the list in your phone, on your fridge, in your wallet. Put yourself on someone else’s list, and commit to it. 

Make friends and meet up with them on a regular basis. Have tea, cook together, go for walks, play video games. Just be there consistently. 

Open your house once a month for community get-togethers. Maybe these are queer/women/BIPOC-only safe spaces, maybe they’re street-wide potlucks. Maybe you make art while crying together. Maybe you binge-watch Lord of the Rings, eat popcorn and share joy.

Think about starting Swaps with your community. Swaps of clothing you don’t need anymore. Swaps of home-made food, seeds, plants or artwork. Swaps of household goods. Get yourself trading and sharing with each other. 

Get a roommate or two. It’ll help each of you save money, reduce loneliness, and might save someone from becoming unhoused. Don't feel obligated to retain that roommate if it's negatively impacting you. This is about a healthy present in a chaotic world, not a desperate act that results in abuse and destruction.

Libraries are funded in large part based on the number of cards they hand out, not books. Get a library card, even if you never use it. Many libraries let you apply online. If your library isn’t physically accessible, or you can’t safely leave your home but you have a cellphone, download the Libby app for books and audiobooks. It’s free, you just need your library card number. If you live or have an address in New York State, you can also get cards to the Brooklyn Public Library and NYC Public Libraries.

Places to volunteer: libraries, hospitals, schools, mental health hotlines, small farms and community gardens, animal shelters, food pantries, mutual aid organizations, medical clinics, harm reduction centers, fire stations, emergency rescue services. 

Advocate for handicapped accessibility in all public spaces. Does your library have a ramp? Your local co-op? Your house? Learn what your disabled community members needs are that are not being met, because it will get worse. 

Do you have skills that can contribute in new ways? For instance, if you're a great bike mechanic, I'll bet you can fix wheelchairs. If you're an electrician, you could help with your neighbor's solar system. If you're handy with a sewing machine, you can make flags and banners.

Keep it local - donate to the after-school music program in your town instead of, say, Planned Parenthood. National organizations will be getting a flood of funding from concerned citizens right now, but local organizations are often more effective and know their community’s needs more intimately.

If you want to participate but in person is too much, or not accessible, go to Zoom meetings. Call or email folks. Perform online tasks, or put up posters.

If you're not sure what you can offer, just ask what people need. Sometimes someone needs their dogs walked, or an emergency baby-sitter. Sometimes a non-profit needs someone to table at an event. Perhaps someone wants a logo designed, or just someone to keep them company. It doesn't have to seem big to you; it could still mean the world to someone else.

Online communities are just as important, and often more accessible. Make the space and time for those meet-ups, whether you’re messaging folks, playing video games together, or finding forums and inspiration. 

Become a safe person for those who need to go back in the closet, or who need to trust someone with their sexuality or gender. 

Run for local office, or sit on the school board. Be the opposing voice in a conservative group.

If you feel safe doing it: advertise. Put up every damn flag at your house except the American flag. Pride, Black Lives Matter, feminism, Earth first, land back - become a visible beacon of safety and hope. If you are still safe, now is NOT the time to go underground. Now is the time to find your people, and be someone for others. So flags, volunteering, barter, lending, carpooling, offering tea, offering your guest room. Make the connections.

The more we connect with and care for our neighbors, the more our neighbors will connect with and care for us. Let’s strengthen and widen our circles. 

*I recognize that for many, much of what I offer can be a genuine safety concern. Sometimes housemates are abusive. Sometimes neighbors threaten you with guns. Use your own discretion and trust your instincts. 

ENVIRONMENT

Small plots of ecological sanctuary make a huge difference. You can plant flowers, collect rainwater, start a compost bin, let your lawn grow, build a hedgerow. Stop spraying pesticides, pick up litter, plant a garden, research native species, celebrate milkweed…

Volunteer or donate to a local conservation organization. 

Visit a park or go for a hike. Visit a local protected zone and learn about the ecosystem with whom you live. Discover your watershed. 

Learn about local pollutants and advocate for protections. Check out your city’s water health publications. 

Question the installation of new businesses, factories and industries. How will they impact the air, water, soil and human health? Protest them with your friends - on a local level, it actually only takes a few hundred people to make waves. I’ve seen huge projects stopped because my friends sat in on every town hall meeting.

Become a citizen scientist - birdwatch, identify local plants and animals, track the weather and then report your findings to naturalist organizations. The Merlin App is a free app that matches birdcalls to the birds in your backyard, iNaturalist takes really accurate photos and identifies them. It can become a whole hobby that also helps maintain consistent scientific data. 

Get your generator in working order. Storms are gonna get worse and you'll need it when the lights go out. Batteries, light bulbs, candles. Get them now. Prepare as if for a blizzard or tornado.

Consider an air filter or a gas mask for after the Clean Air Act is repealed.

Find out whether or not you’re in a flood or hurricane zone, or if you will be in one as climate change continues. What can you do to prepare for or mitigate the damage?

MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH 

Remember that you are WORTHY of receiving gifts and help. Allow yourself to receive help with grace. ASK when you need help, even if you’re not quite sure what you need. 

Eat a lot of food and drink plenty of water; your stressed mindset will make you burn calories. 

Treat yourself. Maybe that means binging television, or buying a cute pair of earrings, or taking a bike ride to your favorite place, or resting in the bath with some fancy soaps. 

Don't isolate. Meet friends for coffee, or Ultimate Frisbee, or to learn to make a cake together. 

Create joy. 

         Don’t Hesitate by Mary Oliver

If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be. We are not wise, and not very often kind. And much can never be redeemed. Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this is its way of fighting back, that sometimes something happens better than all the riches or power in the world. It could be anything, but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.

Greet the sun. Listen to the stars. Breathe with the trees. Lay in the grass. Cuddle a cat. Talk with the moon. Find a new book. Take up knitting. Make music. Journal. Make art. 

Have set days each week for long-distance friends, and check in with each other at least once a week. Send them care packages. Ask for care packages.

Accept that you will not do everything every day, that some days you will stay in bed until one, eat ice cream in your pajamas and just nap with the dog. That is real and beautiful. That chance to relax? That's something they're trying to take away from us. Rest and relaxation and hammocks and good books are all at risk, so enjoying them is also revolutionary. It's important to keep normalcy alive.

Think about your boundaries. Are you, for instance, comfortable housing someone in need? Comfortable helping someone through grief? It's okay if not. But find those boundaries so that you don't overtax yourself.

ART AND MEDIA

Download all of your favorite online media that feature queerness, whether it’s videos, fanfiction or artwork. If content featuring LGBTQ+ becomes listed as porn, and porn is banned, then sites like AO3 will have to wipe all of it from their listings. Contact the creators and see what support you can offer each other.

Find a list of banned books and obtain them somehow so that there are physical copies for when the online sites are shut down. 

Make your own art, and share it!

Don't be shy about your presence, and use art to make your presence known. Slap rainbow stickers on every telephone pole, spray paint a building wall with Black Lives Matter murals, knit a cozy sweater that doubles as a pronoun pin. Write a play that centers around the Land Back fights. Host an impromptu concert in the park, and invite the audience to donate to their local library fund.

PHYSICAL HEALTH AND REPRODUCTION 

Get a medical alert bracelet or have a medical alert card in your wallet. This way, no matter where you are, if you’re unconscious and sent to the ER, EMTs and staff know of your allergies and needs.  For instance, I’m allergic to penicillin, have low vitamin D and take St John’s Wort, a powerful herbal SSRI that could interfere with drugs. 

Find your state’s free Narcan programs, and request Narcan and drug testing strips so that you have them on hand if an emergency arises. 

Get a stockpile of COVID tests, decent masks, and if you plan to get the vaccines, do it now. 

Do not use a period tracking app; do nothing to alert the government to your reproductive medical needs. Unless it’s medically relevant, do not tell your doctor the date of your last menstrual cycle. Pay for all medical needs possible with cash, whether it’s Plan B off the shelf or a co-pay on a prescription. 

If you have any prescriptions, get them refilled as soon as possible. Get extras if you can.  

Get all your birth control needs met now. Implants and IUDs last for years, but if the IUD shifts, you will need medical assistance, so keep that in mind. 

Stock up on condoms and dental dams, get your STD screenings and all similar or related procedures, like colposcopies, mammograms and biopsies done now. 

Consider whether or not you need PrEP for HIV prevention. If you’re at risk but don’t have insurance, there are over-the-counter HIV test kits. They ARE pricey, though.

Stock up on pads and tampons or switch to cloth pads, period underwear or cups. They last at least six years. Cups take less water to clean, though. 

If you're planning to get yourself, your kids or your pets vaccines, do it before January. 

Those who don't want to have kids for the next four years and for whom it’s medically viable should consider a vasectomy. They're reversible, and no one gets stuck with an expected pregnancy. Tube tying is generally irreversible and reversal only has about a 50 percent success rate, depending on how the original procedure was done.

Stock up on basic first aid supplies and educate yourself in basic med training, like CPR, the Heimlich and how to treat pepper spray in the eyes (lots of water). Maybe you’ll find yourself at a protest and your friends get hurt, and you want to be able to help. Perhaps it’s an emergency and there are no safe options to call for help. 

Carry antihistamines with you, even if you don’t have allergies - the woman outside your local coffee shop may not be able to afford an Epi-Pen and you could be the one that keeps her alive long enough for the ambulance to get there. 

Get an umbrella, face mask,bullet-proof vest, and goggles, especially if you are considering joining a protest. Pepper spray, rubber bullets, shrapnel and real bullets are no joke and will be used against you. 

ECONOMICS AND RESOURCES

Invest in wood heating - real wood, not a pellet stove. When fuel prices go up, you will need to have a reliable source of heat. Best to get a wood cook stove. Investigate masonry or rocket stoves because they are very efficient and often can be built by a local company and don't rely on steel, which will also go up as more tariffs are implemented

Put some cash aside outside the bank. Put money in a high interest savings account, but NOT a CD.

Take your car to the mechanic now. Buy snow tires and get your vehicle in working order, because parts will skyrocket in price. 

In your trunk, put together a box of: motor oil, windshield fluid, a small empty gas tank, two gallons of fresh water, brake fluid, tire changing kit, tire pump - anything your car needs. Get two of everything. Have another crate with a blanket, gloves, $200 cash, dishware, a dog leash, some jars or Tupperware. That's for you, if you're in an emergency, want to bring home food, or need to rescue a stray dog. Put a snow shovel in, both for digging yourself out and for moving turtles.

Having a working bike with a tow-behind trailer is an asset, especially as gas and car parts rise in price.

Apply for food stamps, heating assistance, energy discounts, phone discounts, and health insurance now, so you have it for as long as possible before they cut programs.

Anyone close to being able to retire and collect on retirement should consider how that might impact their finances. It might be best to retire early, if you can collect.

Get all your fuel tanks filled now. Propane, oil, kerosene. Even gas stoves, and make sure they're in working order. 

Snail mail will be safer than online communications. Stock up on stamps; sometimes you can get discounts on the USPS website. If you’re sending a lot of packages, try PirateShip.com for discounts. 

FOOD AND WATER

Grow and preserve your own. Learn to cook and share with friends. Start or join a garden club or urban garden. Talk to farmers, read books, watch videos. 

Start looking around your area to see where you can wild harvest. Come Autumn, will you be able to harvest apples from the trees in the city park, or the old farmyard? Rose hips from the bushes along the sidewalk? In the Spring, dandelion leaves from your backyard?

Save seeds. Preserving specific varieties is good, but all seeds are valuable. 

Get a water filter, even if it’s just a water bottle filter. Save it for AFTER the Clean Water Act is slashed, unless your water is already too contaminated to wait. 

Find out how to buy local foods, because tariffs will raise the price of all international goods.

Stock up on food that has to cross a border, like black pepper, chocolate and coffee. Those are my top three, anyway. 

Find a space in your house to use as a root cellar, where it’s cool and damp and dark. Root crops, winter crops and fruits will store longer. You don't have to doomstock, but it's important to have a stored base until your community is strong enough to create its own food. So if during the Winter, you can't grow food, you have a few months supply until it's warm enough to grow again.

Learn how to grow sprouts or shoots on your windowsill. 

Small farms will become havens and targets. Grow with them, preserve, volunteer there, learn. 

Find a local source of meat, because the FDA will not be regulating food-borne illnesses anymore. And eggs, if possible. Buy half a cow or something.

Farmers markets will often accept FoodStamps as payment, and prices may be lower than the stores. 

Start sharing meals with neighbors - maybe you host dinner on Mondays and they host dinner on Thursdays. Lets you practice cooking and gives you a social life. 

PERSONAL AND PUBLIC SAFETY 

Unless they’re actively attacking, don’t trust anything the government says. But the minute they say they’re coming for migrants/trans folx/BIPOC - you go find those people, get them to safety, and pretend you never, ever, ever saw them. 

Do not tell figures of authority of your plans, your ideologies, your efforts to help those under attack. 

Take a self-defense course; the chances you have a weapon if you’re attacked are slim, so you need to learn how to use your body. 

Carry a lighter. It’s small, lightweight and legal with no permit. If you’re grabbed, then putting a flame - even a small one - to someone’s skin can make them let go long enough for you to run. 

Switch your Internet browser to DuckDuckGo. It blocks surveillance and ads. AdNauseam is  a browser extension that scrambles your data so it's less traceable, so the government can't see what you're doing. Get them both. They're free

Install blackout or dark curtains so that visual surveillance into your house is limited. I recognize the military has heat sensors, but your neighbor probably doesn't.

Be aware that Venmo and related apps tell the IRS what you're spending money on. Be careful what you use it for and how you record transactions. 

If making a “suspicious purchase,” like of Plan B, use cash. Wear a baseball cap, sunglasses, mask and contour makeup to hide your face from the security cameras.

Think about security proofing your windows, which makes them less breakable, or backglazing them with bulletproof glass.

The police, now more than ever, are an entity of the state. DO NOT CALL THEM, do not trust them. If you are raped or attacked, go straight to the hospital first. Do NOT shower. Go to the ER, tell them what happened and request a full rape kit. Go next to an independent organization that will help protect you and your rights, and help you decide next steps.

If there's something happening that you might otherwise have called the cops for, but there are people of color or trans individuals involved, DO NOT CALL THE COPS. They WILL kill trans and BIPOC folk. 

If you’re considering a divorce, and you’re serious about it, do it now. No-fault divorces are on the chopping block. 

If you're in the US, you can call 211 to help you find resources.

Crisis Text Line offers services to the US, Ireland, Canada, and the UK.

RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) is a US service offers a lot of information for sexual abuse survivors.

The Trevor Lifeline is a service for queer youth in the US.

If you're a minor, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Minors.

If you're an adult, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Adults.

You might search on Qwant for like something like "resources for people in abuse" or "abuse resources help" or "domestic violence survivors resources".

PROTESTING AND FIGHTING BACK

Make clear decisions and plans about what protests you'll be a part of and how. Tell only your most trusted friends where you are going, but be sure to tell them.

Obtain safety/riot gear, like masks, goggles and padding. Always carry fresh water for washing out wounds and pepper-sprayed eyes.

Practice that self defense you learned. What are the easiest moves?

Become someone's protest buddy, especially if they, for any reason, might be more vulnerable. Stick to one another and get each other out of dangerous situations. Come up with a safe word, and a safe way to communicate across a protest. A song, a wolf howl, a walkie talkie.

I know nothing about apps, but there are communication apps and social media out there that folx under oppressive regimes use and recommend. Find those.

Keep emergency contacts on standby if you're going to protest. Make sure there's someone who could help bail you out of jail or can help raise money for bail. 

Know your rights, and don’t give them anything when they arrest you. Make a list of lawyers and advocacy groups you feel safe trusting. 

Train in proper video and recording methods to track what happens and what the police do. 

If you're participating in a long term protest, plan properly for your health and the health of your home, partners and pets. 

Get your affairs in order. You may not make it out of a protest alive. 

When planning discussions with folks who might disagree with you, know that you may NOT actually be the best person for said discussion. If you’re really far left and you want to chat with your MAGA uncle about immigration, maybe find someone who’s more center-leaning but unsure to be a go-between. It’s less alienating to your uncle and less traumatizing for you.  

I know I’ve said this already, but carry first-aid supplies, learn basic first-aid, and carry a lighter, so that you can help those in need and protect yourself. 

Fight back with everyday statements. When someone says, “Those illegals are taking all our jobs,” say something like, “Wow, that sounds like some shit a weird Nazi would say.” Add “weird Nazi” to your responses. Laugh at the absurdities of MAGA statements. Make them feel foolish, or give good one-liners that leave them scratching their heads. Can’t think of any? Start binging comedians to learn how to give quick comebacks. 

In order to keep yourself from falling into a bad group, it's important to develop your critical thinking skills:  (credit to @creature-wizard)

Learn to apply the Five W's (who, what, when, where, and why) when encountering any information.

Learn common logical fallacies.

Learn the difference between fact, opinion, belief, and prejudice.

Don't equate emotional reactions with some kind of innate or higher moral guidance.

Ask yourself if you're "thinking for yourself" or being led to believe you're thinking for yourself.

Know what emotional manipulation tactics look like.

Watch out for these behaviors in any new group you join.

Yes, there are ways to confirm the age of an old text without having the original text itself.

Learn how propaganda works.

Watch out for these red flags in spiritual groups.

And watch out for this red flag.

Understand that belief doesn't have to be binary.

LEAVING THE STATES

This post is again from @creature-wizard:

Get a passport. It's also an easy way to officially change your gender market. Canada is becoming really conservative, but Mexico has some of the safest queer cities in the world. You can stay there for no reason for more than three months, leave for three days and come back and keep doing that indefinitely. It's cheap and warm and the food is spectacular. Plus the entire country enshrined abortion rights. 

You will need a go bag. It should include non perishable snacks, water, paperwork, copies of your id, cash, meds, and whatever you love for comfort. Know where it is at all times. Keep it near an exit. My go bag will at least contain my ancestral seeds, my teddy bear, and extra socks.

DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE WHAT THEY WILL DO. Remember the bomb threats, the arson and the insurrection. THEY WILL NOT HESITATE TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN AND TARGET YOUR LOVED ONES AND PETS. Believe them. PLEASE believe them when they say they are Hitler. Trump is just a figurehead. He has the force of an entire party behind him. It will change everything. He can implement martial law overnight. 

Make two or three escape plans. During WWII, people escaped by walking, by hiding under garbage in trucks, by building hot air balloons that they flew, by living in attics for years. 

It can be done, but you have to think ahead. We don't have the time to say, "Oh, it won't get that bad.” People are already dying. It is that bad. 

If you know someone who is MAGA or even close to it, NEVER tell them your escape plan. Never tell anyone anything if you don't trust them enough to hold a loaded gun to your head.

If you’re leaving, consider how to bring your pets. Do they need vaccines to cross a border? Do you even have a cat carrier, and adequate food for travel? What about costs for boarding while you resettled in your new home?

Who will house you if you need a safe space? Make a list of places you have friends, or couches you can sleep on.

LOOK, IT’S TOUGH. IT’S GONNA BE TOUGH. BUT IT CAN BE JOYFUL, AND MYSTERIOUS, AND FUN, TOO. SO LET ME LEAVE YOU WITH THESE THOUGHTS:

Overall, the more you rely on community and less on capitalism, the more security you could have during difficult times. The more secure you are, the more you can and will feel comfortable helping others. 

The Holocaust happened because a lot of good people did nothing, in large part because they decided it couldn't possibly get that bad. But the right-wingers know how to play the long game, and they are actively chipping away at our liberties. 

The way I see it, there are now three primary parts to this rebellion: 

Those physically stopping the issues by destroying dams and animal testing labs, harassing and attacking politicians or corporations, and chaining themselves to bulldozers.

Those ferrying others to safety and providing the necessary resources for those leaving or hiding.

Those feeding, comforting and healing others through food growing, meal prep, offering tea and therapy, and putting down roots to grow community. 

So where do you stand? Do you fight or flee? Do you share cookies or get out the protest signs? Can you do all three? (Probably not, so choose wisely.)

And in the end:

IN 150 CHARACTERS OR LESS

Everything is on fire, but everyone I love is doing beautiful things

and trying to make life worth living.

and I know I don’t have to believe in everything,

but I believe in that. 

~ Nikita Gill 

Take care of each other and take care of yourself. You are not alone. Godspeed. 

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

three weeks down, 12 to go… i said yes to a new student which i’m kind of having second thoughts about but well too late now. (they’re taking the hunter test, so going through january, which is nice since most of my others will be dropping off in december.) that brings me to 12 total, two of whom are twice a week, and also meant that this was another 7-day tutoring week (at a little over 35 total hours of work), lol. the good news is that the content development race is over, with all sets for this leg of the project having been claimed, and while i have a few to do i no longer feel the pressure of “if i do these too slowly i’ll miss out on more hours.” which is already a huge psychic lift! i am not fully prepped for tomorrow’s sessions but i am tbh not worried about it for various reasons, including that tomorrow i will work on some answer keys while watching the indistry finale and it will be nice and chill.

MOST excitingly in work news, i found an app that combined with my new love affair with the apple pencil will i think allow me to compose my work to do lists as i dreamed… thrilled beyond the telling of it tbh. we’re so back.

my room is still very messy but i did a bunch of dishes today. i have not done many of my little habits but i hit five workouts & 70k steps. i think i am going to do as a redditor suggested and treat this 10 week workout program as two 5 week ones with a break in the middle to keep working out but take it easier for a week or so, which means i’m more than halfway done with the first “leg” and also gives me a place to do my covid vax (i don’t… love… that covid vax season coincides with my busy season lol). i have not given a lot of conscious time for fun or rest this week but i kept it moving on a busy donation day for free store & i had a really good zoom talk with my friend i have a standing zoom date with & tonight i got to see faith/void fuck it the hell up on the lower east side with several fond familiar faces in attendance. i also did finish the patrick radden keefe book about human smuggling in chinatown although it came so down to the wire i wound up screenshotting the last 20 pages to finish after libby took it back. today i looked at the silly magicians fic i started right as things were kicking into full gear and found that i still liked the little of it that hours recently spent content developing. in the next twelve weeks there WILL be times when i wonder why i am doing this to myself but i’ve been at this long enough to know now that the answer is that this stretch is what makes possible things elsewhen in the year like sending a few emails and fucking off because i have cramps or i have plans or i’m very busy reading an entire middle grade fantasy series in a single month, plus ofc all of the sleeping in. my goal so far has been to get through it without feeling crazy and so far i feel pretty sane!

[astriiformes]

hi! Sorry to bother--I am also graduating soon and I'm scouring my university library--I LOVED the list you made, do you have any other recommendations you wouldn't mind sharing? frankly you could throw a works cited page at me and I'd be happy

I've certainly got more papers I could recommend, though I can't claim they're all directly monster-related. My actual academic field is the history of science, with an emphasis on the early modern period and early print culture -- I just try to tie it to my other special interests however I can!

If you're interested in monster theory, I definitely recommend various readings on witchcraft and the occult as well -- there are significant links between the early modern witch trials/folkloric beliefs about witchcraft and some of our "modern" monsters like werewolves. Try:

Wolves, Witches, and Werewolves: Witchcraft and Lycanthropy from 1423 to 1700 by Jane P. Davidson and Bob Canino

The Saturnine History of Jews and Witches by Yvonne Owens

From Sorcery to Witchcraft: Clerical Conceptions of Magic in the Later Middle Ages by Michael D. Bailey

Witchcraft and Magic in the Nordic Middle Ages by Stephen A. Mitchell

The Specific Rationality of Medieval Magic by Richard Kieckhefer (who has written a LOT on magic and witchcraft in general)

Male Witches in Early Modern Europe by Laura Apps and Andrew Gow

If you're interested in monster studies from more of a sci-fi/fantasy angle and like reading about speculative fiction, consider:

On the Poetics of the Science Fiction Genre by Darko Suvin (really anything by Darko Suvin is a solid bet, he's a hugely influential scholar in the study of science fiction)

The journal Science Fiction Studies which has a lot of great articles and special issues (including a great one on Frankenstein!)

Colonialism and the Emergence of Science Fiction by John Rieder

For a grab-bag of odd and unconventional papers and books I've found interesting recently, have a look at:

The Soul, Evil Spirits, and the Undead: Vampires, Death, and Burial in Jewish Folklore and Law by Saul Epstein and Sara Libby Robinson

Melancholy as a Disease: Learning About Depression as a Disease from Burton's Anatomy of Melancholy by Jennifer Radden

A Case for a Trans Studies Turn in Victorian Studies: “Female Husbands” of the Nineteenth Century by Lisa Hager

Battling Demons With Medical Authority: Werewolves, Physicians, and Rationalization by Nadine Metzger

And, last but not least, I've only skimmed these last few, but as I'm currently on a huge Dracula research kick, here's a couple articles that have caught my eye:

Rethinking the New Woman in Dracula by Jordan Kistler (this one was especially refreshing to see, given the fact that many academic takes on the subject are.... bad)

Masculine Spatial Embodiment in Dracula by Julie Smith

Information in the 1890s: Technological, Journalistic, Imperial, Occult by Richard Menke

A ‘Ghastly Operation’: Transfusing Blood, Science and the Supernatural in Vampire Texts by Aspasia Stephanou

[kernyen-xo]

Long time!

Firstly, how y’all been? I’ve been wandering in from time to time and reading some of your posts. I just haven’t felt like posting myself until now.

Here we go.

What In the World: I walked out of Daiso and almost gave this woman a heart attack trying to get into my parked vehicle. My first thought was why in the world was this lady sitting in my vehicle, and why in the world the driver’s seat of all things?! I mean, why not the passenger side or the backseat?? And, why won’t my key unlock the door!? And then, almost immediately, after trying to open the door a second time, I was like, “Hold on now.. Uh oh. Oh no, this isn’t my vehicle!” Holy hot pockets! I immediately backed away, put up my hands, and told her, “I’m sorry,” several times, and then said, “My mistake, wrong car.” She just stared at me through the closed window, scared shitless. In case she didn’t understand what I said, I stepped back and gave her a respectful bow, and then hurriedly got into my car, which was parked in the next row. I hoped that when she saw me drive away, she was able to put 2+2 together because we had the same vehicle (same make, model, and color). Needless to say the humiliation of it all stuck with me the remainder of the day. I am such a dweeb.

Houston, We have a Problem: Went to Houston last month for my niece’s wedding. I just want to say that I don’t get why Houston is the 4th most populous city in our nation. I mean, the weather. It is pretty miserable. It was super humid and most of us were bitten by these mutant mosquitoes! Every wedding event my niece had was outdoors or it didn’t have A/C. Like the inside pickleball courts. She had a farewell outdoor crawdad boil for her guests, and the wedding and reception were also outdoors. All the events were pretty much held in the Heights area, which despite the weather is a nice historical area. But, you know what? I was glad that I went to Houston because my niece had a great wedding. I loved catching up with my nieces and nephews! I loved the serve yourself margaritas machines! Great people and great food and drinks! The kid and I went to Tenfold, a popular coffee place where I had my first cold brew with lemonade. It was was delicious and refreshing. On another day, the kid and I walked to have breakfast at this cafe with a great vibe. Attached to it was an antique shop, which we perused after we ate. We also did some shopping at Rice Village. We wanted to visit San Antonio but our schedule couldn’t spare the time.

The Kid Jr: My granddaughter graduated from the 8th grade last week! I’m so proud of her. I gave her a Kindle, which I was pretty excited about because she’s starting to enjoy reading, something she didn’t like before.

Saying Good-bye: I also attended my aunt’s funeral last week. Out of 8 kids, it’s just my mom and Uncle Junior that remains. It seems like yesterday when my generation of cousins were kids and our parents were still young and getting into their own shenanigans. It was a sad and bittersweet day. There were a lot of relatives that I didn’t even know, all of them cousins.

Books: I splurged. I decided I needed to start building up my personal library. It’s been a while since I’ve bought an actual book. I have been reading on my kindle or listening to audiobooks from the library app, Libby. It was time to start reading from actual books and adding to my home library. I used to have over 1,000 books but I got rid of most of them because it was becoming too much to pack and move them - especially when I was moving about 3 times a year. But now I have my own home and I’m not planning to move - at least for 5 years.

So, let the book buying begin!

The current book:

If you love birds, you’ll enjoy this book. Amy Tan’s backyard is a bird’s paradise. In this world of birds, you’ll learn about their habits, heartbreak, wonderful curiosities about the whys and why nots of birds’ actions. A lot of times unexplained, but if you are an avid bird watcher like Amy, her reasonings as to why the out of ordinary behaviors were interesting and entertaining. You will enjoy her drawings too.

The Kid and Me: Here’s what we did at the wedding 😆

The beautiful bride and her groom:

(Houston, The Heights May 2024)

How can they look so good in the sticky weather?

The Kid takes a picture of Yours Truly: (Grass Valley, May 2024)

My Loves:

(Sac-Town May 2024)

This post has been brought to you by Toodles, Inc.

[carpooling-the-internet]

Friends!!! Sherlockians!!! To those on an ACD Sherlock Holmes kick rn who haven’t yet thought to explore the radio readings/dramatizations: I recommend!!! I’d been skeptical before but I am admittedly a convert now after only hearing one episode.

I’ve been working my way through the canon (via audiobook so I have something to look forward to when I do chores and walk the dog) and listened to every free audiobook I could find on Spotify by now except for a handful of stories in the Casebook. There are a few audiobooks of Casebook but I couldn’t find one with an English accent and for some reason it just doesn’t sound right if the accents are wrong?

But then today I stumbled on a recording of the BBC radio version on Libby (my local library app). And the Lions Mane episode did NOT disappoint! Sound effects! So many immersive sound effects and seemingly improvised lines/ vocalizations serve to make it seem like you’re standing right next to them as a fly on the wall rather than listening to Watson read his copy of the strand to you. It was the 1989 radio series by Bert Coules with Clive Merrison as Holmes and Michael Williams as Watson. Here’s a link to a YouTube playlist hat has all the episodes. I can’t speak for all of them ofc bc I’ve only just listened to lions mane so far, but I was just so excited to share my little discovery that I wanted to post this anyway!

Has anyone else got any recommendations for radio dramatizations of the books? Let me know!

[topsyturvy-turtely]

Let Me Fix You (Johnlock OS)

for the one and only @safedistancefrombeingsmart <3

“Fuck! I mean- shite! Oh, bloody hell!” John watched as that asshole run away, clutching the knife wound he had left on him. “Jesus Christ. I hate you.”

“John! Why are you- Did you get hurt?”, Sherlock came running towards him.

“No, I am cursing because it is fucking funny. Of course, I am hurt, you bloody-“, John bit his tongue. “He barely missed my scar.”, he added, more quietly.

There was actual concern shining in Sherlock’s eyes. “How bad is it? Let me loo-“

“I am fine!”, John turned his body away in a quick movement. It hurt. He gritted his teeth and pushed air out through them. It made a funny noise, almost like a whistle. “Let’s just get home.” John already walked back out on the brighter lit main street.

“Don’t you think we should call a doctor-“

“I am a fucking doctor!”

“But John-“

“I am goddamn fine fucking enough, okay. Now just do your-”, John let go of his wound to wave vaguely with his good arm in the air. “Thing and get us a bloody cab.” John talked- yelled too loudly, too aggressively. But he didn’t care right now. He was pretty sure he wasn’t even cut that badly. But he was pissed as hell and the asshole stabbing him got away and there was no one else around to yell at. So his flatmate would just have to endure it. John had gone through worse with him.

When Sherlock stared a bit too long at him, John grunted. Immediately Sherlock moved to get them a cab.

(keep reading = link to ao3 and funfacts)

---

title: Let Me Fix You

fandom: Sherlock (TV)

words: 1,932

summary: John gets injured during a case. He is pissed as hell. And determined he will stitch himself up. It's not his fault he forgot that Sherlock actually cares about him.

additional tags:

Whump, John Whump, John Watson Whump, POV Third Person, Hurt John Watson, Sherlock Holmes Loves John Watson, and takes care of him, Angry John Watson, Worried Sherlock, Angst, okay probably not actually angst lol, Hurt/Comfort, maybe?, bro idk, doctors are the worst patients, John is a living example for that, Developing Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, I take no responsibility for medical accuarcy, You Have Been Warned, DO NOT COPY TO ANOTHER SITE OR APP, Light Dom/sub, Dom/sub Undertones

---

tagging list (tell me if you wanna be added or removed💚) @catlock-holmes @justanobsessedpan @helloliriels @fluffbyday-smutbynight @inevitably-johnlocked @hisfavouritejumper @rhasima @forfucksakejohn @ohlooktheresabee @turbulenttrouble @so-youre-unattached-like-me @totallysilvergirl @peanitbear @train-mossman @loki-lock @smulderscobie @timberva @grace-in-the-wilderness @chinike @pansherlock @the-smol-bean-libby-blog @jawnn-watson @whatnext2020 @escapingthereality @missdeliadili @kettykika78 @7-percent @speedymoviesbyscience @astudyin221b @francj15 @captaincrucnh @ladylindaaa @we-r-loonies @mxster-jocale @sherlockcorner @noahspector @our-stars-graveside @jobooksncoffee @baker-street-blog @quickslvxr @macgyvershe @myladylyssa @johnlock2708 @battledress @a-victorian-girl @dreamerofthemeadow @oetkb12 @ohnoesnotagain @mutedsilence @muddboi

[dukeofankh]

Look, I am as much of a fan of musty old books as anyone, but I am also on team "if it's worth doing, it's worth doing poorly." My executive functioning is not good enough to bring a hard copy book with me to work, pull it out when I have a moment, take a read, and then put it back when I'm done. The added step of using a library just hasn't worked for me since I moved out. But phones... phones make it so much better.

Since I started using Libby and Kindle i went from reading about one or two books a year to one to two a week. I'm usually working on two at any given moment, a written book for when I'm sitting doing nothing, and an audiobook for when I'm driving.

Like, people aren't constantly on their phones just because Tiktok is a communist addiction psyop or something, it's legitimately massively convenient to have a source of mental enrichment on hand at all times. Remember how we were all "ooh, we've got all the knowledge of humanity in our pockets 24/7?" Yeah. We do. Phones are good. Digital media's business model and frequent lack of user ownership of purchased content is bad, but hey, get Libby (or overdrive, or whatever library app is available in your region, if applicable) and you're only ever borrowing for free anyways.

Reading books matters more than the way you read books.

[impossibleobservationkryptonite]

Library Rules:

To quote Davy Jones "well they're more guidelines than rules".

What I've learned in time (thus far) working as a librarian and what you can do as a patron.

If you want the TLDR: you can just read the bolded stuff if you want! :)

I swear to god you're allowed to do everything in a library normally if you don't have a library card. The only thing you're not allowed to do is take items home with you. So what can you do instead? Read it here. Watch the movie here (most of the time the people who work here will let you have a guest pass for the computer, and then don't ask you what you're doing with your time on the computer.) (unless you're watching porn. Don't watch porn on a public computer because we will kick you out for the day minimally.)

Come to a Program! Again you do not need a library card to come to our programs. They're chill, they're Gucci. We have so much fun stuff for you to do here. And it's FREE. (To the one person who might see this and be like "BUT MY TAXES!" yeah, your taxes paid for this, why aren't you utilizing the library? Why don't you have your library card? Why aren't you coming to my sick sick writing programs, or my awesome D&D programs?)

Children say odd shit. I had one kid tell me as he was sprinting to a computer, while holding a guest pass to be able to log onto the computer, "I'm gonna shove this up your bootyhole!". He said that verbatim, and honestly respect kid. but also like, hey, I'm just helping you get on the computer, relax. Also if you're going to be working consistently with kids/teens (like me), they're hilarious and are usually much more understanding than the adults.

Every library is different when it comes to creating a program. We have to normally plan months in advance to be able to do something. At the library I'm at we're planning for programs three months ahead while currently running our November Programs.

You can ask questions that you think are stupid. They're not. I promise they're not. I have had people ask me if they can have a sticker while looking at the sign that says "free stickers!!!! HERE!!" Most of the time we'll probably want to research your question and get stoked (or at least I will) by being able to research about whatever you're interested in. (Please ask us what we like to learn about in our free time.)

Sometimes, the book is checked out, because someone got to it before you. Them's the breaks man, we can't go to the person who check it out, and ask them to check it back in so we can check it out to you. However, we can put you on the list to be able to read it next. WITH YOUR LIBRARY CARD. Please get a library card. Can you tell how super chill I am about getting a library card?

Fun Fact! A lot of libraries will let you have temporary library cards. For example you can get a New York Public Library digital card (a temporary one) for 2-3 weeksish before having to go in and getting a physical card. So use it for the couple of weeks! Listen to an audio book!

Another one! I have so many. I'm sorry. You do not need an Audible subscription to be able to read eBooks or listen to Audiobooks on your phone. Use Libby! Just input your library card on the app, and use it like a regular library card. You have to wait until it's your turn (like physical copies of library materials), and then you have the 2-3 weeks to be able to listen to your stuff or read your eBook! And if your library does Hoopla, it's basically the exact same as Libby, however it's only 8 items rather than however many you can check out at once on a library card. Hoopla is a bit more convoluted than that, but if you want to know more just ask!

That's all I got right now. Sorry for the long post. :')

[lauraelizabethmarazzi]

2024 Book Review

As the year comes to a close, one of my favourite traditions is reflecting on the literature I consumed this year. It was an ambitious year with the goal being 50 books - and yet I exceeded it, finishing 68! My most prolific year yet.

Stats:

For those titillated by pie charts, statistics, and graphs, here is the breakdown of my books as provided by the app Fable:

My most-read genre was Romance with a total of 35 books read (Emily Henry being the top author in this category [ with 3books read] closely followed by Abby Jimenez). Fantasy was next with 18, Literary Fiction 16, Historical Fiction 14, and lastly 12 Mystery Books. (Some books fall under multiple genres, of course.) My average rating was 4 stars. I read the most in August and December, finishing 8 books in each. One book was read on my Kobo, 32 were "physical" reads, and 34 were courtesy of audiobooks (mostly through the Libby app).

Last year I broke down my reading highlights into categories and I thought I would follow that same vein this year.

Reese's Book Club:

I read 12 novels from Reese's Book Club. Anyone who knows me is aware of my perhaps unhealthy love of her Book Club. Her team has the ability to consistently pick well told stories. Of the 12, the only book I wouldn't recommend would be "The Cactus" by Sarah Haywood. Otherwise, Reese is your girl for a good story.

General Lit:

A broad category with some highlights: "Demon Copperhead" by Barbara Kingsolver, "Intermezzo" by Sally Rooney, "Blue Sisters" by Coco Mellors, and "Obasan" by Joy Kogawa. An honourable mention to "Lolita" by Vladimir Nakobov, which has been on my TBR list for years and didn't disappoint.

Biographies:

One of my tried and true genres. The standouts this year were "Thicker Than Blood" by Kerry Washington, "Down the Drain" by Julia Fox, and "Crying in H-Mart" by Michelle Zauner. Fantasy This year I properly got into fantasy, with top favourites being the second and third books from Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series, "The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi" by Shannon Chakraborty, and the Fourth Wing series.

Summary:

This was my best reading year yet, which has now led me to the slightly delusional goal of reading 75 books next year. For Christmas, I got a Kobo, and I'm interested to see how that changes my reading habits. I also surprised myself by completing more audiobooks than physical books this year, and might have found a good hack to read ALL the books ALL the time (plus it really helps me tackle classic lit). Moving forward I am wanting to read more classic literature and focus on books that have been on my TBR list for quite a while.

Thank you for indulging this chronicler,

Laura

[dejwrld]

For Christmas I'm gifting myself hella Octavia E. Butler books 😃 I'm gonna get the Parable series and Bloodchild, hopefully both written copies and graphic novel adaptations if Santa and my paycheck deems it a worthy cause 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

The first Octavia Butler book I read was Kindred and that was in middle school. I loved the book and I am a fan of her writing tbh. I heard it got a tv adaption that didn’t live up to the book and I am highly disappointed in that. But also, try the Libby app for like ebooks and audiobooks. If you have a library card, everything on there free. It’s like having a public library but on your phone

[aintmyjewelry]

i need to vent for a second

i am soooo sick of seeing people be like "booktok has ruined literature. it's all just smutty romances now. there's no more serious books."

no. that's just not fucking true. maybe if you got off social media and like went to your library and browsed the books or, hell, used the Libby app and set the search filters to what you want you would see all the fucking books that are out there.

and also why are people acting like erotic novels were just created in the last couple of years. while people were publishing "serious" books way back in the day, in the 15th and 16th and 17th and 18th and 19th centuries, others were also publishing erotic literature. we've always had both in society. get off your high horse and read what you want to read and let others read what they want to read.

fin.

[juleskelleybooks]

Hello beautiful person! I received the books I signed up for a few days ago and have been at a loss for words since then. I absolutely LOVED the messages and am waiting for this weekend when I have the whole thing off and will start reading them. (I had actually just borrowed one from the libby app the week prior too XD) I really appreciate you sending them and will be getting you a coffee/ko-fi when I'm doing my online bills later this month. Thank you again, I can't explain how excited I was to receive them. <3

Hello darling! I'm so glad you got them, and I'm glad they've sparked joy. (Also, thanks for borrowing on the Libby app! The more people borrow them, the more they show up as desired and more copies might be bought, etc.)

[spacebeyonce]

📚dom's library: may wrap up📚

alright! wrap up for all the books I've read (or tried to read) in may. I was able to read soooo many books (13!!! 13 books!!!) thanks to the libby app and my job letting us listen to stuff through our headphones. I haven't read this many books since high school!

this will be a bit long, because I'm not going to be short about these books, so. bear with me! june's will probably be a smaller list lmao. and I will try my best to be spoiler free in my reviews!

anyway! let's get into it.

5 - 4 ⭐:

👻 how to sell a haunted house by grady hendrix (5⭐)

after the sudden death of her parents, louise has to return to charleston to deal with her parents' estate and her insufferable younger brother mark, who she's been estranged from for years. as they sift through their childhood home, laden with memories and puppets, mark and louise discover that this house has more than the puppets and dolls for them to handle.

lord, this book. I've liked most of grady hendrix's books so far, but this one really got me. I loved this! I had so much fun listening to it! it was giving goosebumps energy and I LOVED that, I was LIVING.

it was funny, it was scary, and it was horribly sad when I didn't expect it to be. when I tell you that I finished this audiobook quietly sobbing at my work desk I am not bullshitting you. how to sell a haunted house is a reminder for why I do not fuck with puppets or dolls.

🌆 if beale street could talk by james baldwin (5⭐)

nineteen years old, clementine (mainly known as tish) is in love with her childhood friend alfonzo (mainly known as fonny), and has recently discovered that she is pregnant with his child. they plan to marry, but then fonny is imprisoned for a crime that he did not commit. with the clock ticking down until the birth of their child, tish and her family work in an effort to clear fonny's name and get him out of jail.

AAAAH!!! this BOOK!!! I had borrowed it on a whim 'cause I'm interested in watching the movie adaptation, but was curious to see how the book went before that. and jesus christ.

this was so.....like when I reached the end, I felt very.....incomplete?? the open ending jarred me a little, but I definitely didn't hate it! I would have liked a concrete ending, a true conclusion, but the uncertainty the book ended on...it felt real. realistic. it stung a bit.

I loved reading tish and fonny fall in love, and my GOD did they fall - they love each other so ardently, so completely!! the devotion they have for each other, my goodness. it definitely stole my breath a few times.

and their families!!! the way most of them went above and beyond to do what they can and get fonny out of jail!! the full, open support they have for tish and her pregancy!! the absolute love and joy her family has at welcoming a new life into the world oh my goddddd. I believe in love y'all, I truly do.

🚢 into the raging sea by rachel slade (5⭐)

on october 1st, 2015, hurricain joaquin struck the bahamas and sank the cargo ship el faro, taking all thirty three lives on board. after interviews with family of the crew, maritime experts, and using the last twenty six hours of audio captured on the el faro's last voyage, rachel slade recounts the final hours of the crew of the el faro and casts a critical light on the maritime shipping industry, and how lives were sacrificed for profit.

okaaaaay, so I mentioned a while back that I get really focused on a certain shipwreck every now and then. for the last couple months, thanks to the well there's your problem podcast, I've been ridiculously fixated on the sinking of the s.s. el faro back in 2015 - a cargo ship that sailed directly into the eye of a cat 3 hurricane and got its shit rocked. when I heard this book mentioned, I had to see if it was available to listen to. and it was!!!

I'm embarrassed to admit it, but it takes a lot for me to get into a non-fiction book - and this one had me riveted. this disaster really was just one little mistake after another, until it became a domino effect that they couldn't escape. I think this has gripped me so because it was so preventable. this didn't have to happen! if the ship was in a better state, if the captain pulled his head out of his ass and listened to his crew, if tote maritime company wasn't so fixated on profit that the people working on these ships become collateral, like....!! 🗣️EL PROBLEMA ES CAPITALISMO!!! and fuck climate change!!!

⛪ transcendent kingdom by yaa gyasi (5⭐)

gifty, a sixth year phd student, is taking on the care of her mother, who is so depressed she can't get out of bed. gifty is studying neuroscience, trying to understand how the brain is affected by depression and addiction - for her mother, and for her brother, nana, who died of an overdose after becoming addicted to pain medication. while dealing with this loss and the decline of her mother, gifty is also grappling with her faith, raised in an evangelical household and trying to reconcile all the pain she has lived through with the peace and salvation she was promised through the church.

my review for this book was simply that I felt flayed open. that this book carved my chest open, cracked apart my ribs and peered inside. gifty's thoughts and struggles when it came to christianity were so like my own that I was genuinely shaken. her questions, her doubts, her feelings and hoping and wanting - I've felt all of that, too. all of it!

in gifty I truly see so much of myself. her struggles with religion and faith, and especially the loss of faith in the face of loss. of praying so much, praying so hard for a loved one to get well, to live on, and then it just...not happening. nothing can cut your faith quicker than that.

her relationship with her mother as well like goddamn godDAMN....that same kind of tough love. that same wild devotion to god. that same ability to just say the most cutting, out of pocket shit about you out of NOWHERE....gifty you are stronger than the us marines. doubly so because she also had to deal with ALABAMA. ALABAMA!!! AND A WHITE ASS TOWN TOO!!! STRENGTH!!!!

🦢 the beautiful ones by silvia moreno-garcia (5⭐)

a regency-esque story based in fantasy france with a sprinkle of magic, we follow the stories of antonina beaulieu, hector auvray, and valerie beaulieu as they deal with the grand season and all that entails. antonina, hoping to find love like the ones she's read in stories - and also hoping to outrun the rumors about her due to her telekinetic powers. hector, a telekinetic preformer that has returned to loisail after ten years with one goal in mind: to win back the heart of his first love - the crown jewel of loisail, valerie beaulieu.

when I tell you that this book had me KICKING MY FEET and GIGGLING!!! I AM A HECTOR/NINA TRUTHER, I BELIEVE!! it was so sweet?? and romantic?? and I love a good second chance romance, though it doesn't fall under what that trope usually means. but it was so sweet!! that's all I can say over and over and over, I just. it was love prevailing despite the odds. nina was so bright and earnest and true to herself, and hector had such a quiet sweetness beneath all that melancholy.

and valerie. bro she is so cersei-core I am SICK. the desire to have the power that your name once held, the resentment of having to follow the whims of what's expected of you and not what you want, looking down on other women and holding yourself above them, loving someone so fiercely and madly that it kind of twists into hate like!!! cersei lannister core!!! this woman was NASTY work and I LOVED her.

I do wish that hector and nina's powers were explored a little more? like....what's the magic system. how did these powers happen. are there other people with powers. but it didn't bring down the story for me! I really loved this, I was swooning.

🌊 river woman, river demon by jennifer givhan (4.75⭐)

eva santos moon is a wife, mother, artist - and witch, practicing brujeria and curanderisma in honor of her late mother. eva has hit a low point in her life - inspiration has left her, she's suffering from blackouts and memory issues, and her connection to her magic feels distant. on top of all this, she is haunted by the death of a beloved childhood friend that happened many years ago, and memories of her are stirring when her husband is incarcerated as a suspect for the murder of their friend, eva must do her best to hold her family together and free her husband - even though she doesn't believe he's as innocent as he claims...

this book bro.....this fuckin' book. it was - I loved the mystery! the connection between the death of her friends, past and present. but the main character?? eva??? she drove me up the fucking wall.

she was so deep in her goddamn head it was genuinely wild as a mf. like, when her husband says something that read SO CLEARLY to me that he wanted his wife to BELIEVE IN HIM she's just like 'oh is he accusing me, is he saying I'm the bad guy here' like my sister in christ!!! pull your head out of your ass for five seconds and trust in your man!!! and oh my GOD her man.

jericho is a fine fine fine slice of chocolate cake. he is steady, he is warm and inspiring, hardworking and devoted. he is ten toes DOWN for eva, he is UNSHAKEABLE for her. and she just doubts and doubts and doubts. and I KNOW it's for the character journey. but like bitch if you're gonna mistrust your husband like this then I'LL take him, shit!!

aside from that, this book was SO good. I really enjoyed the mystery plot throughout, and when everything started coming together I was literally screaming in the car at every twist and reveal like broooooo. excellent book. but get your shit together eva.

3 - 2 ⭐:

🎸 we sold our souls by grady hendrix (3.25⭐)

twenty years after the end of metal band durt wurk, former guitarist kris polaski is miserable. her job is terrible, she has no money, no friends, and no music in her. on top of all that, kris gets news that chills her to the bone - terry hunt, her old bandmate and the man who cast his bandmates off to go solo is going on a farewell tour and bringing his band koffin to a close. pushed to finally confront terry and demand answers for his abandonment, kris decides to try and reunite her bandmates, knowing the risk - knowing that they might still hate her, for what she did. but on the way, kris finds out that terry might have given away more than just durt wurk's sucess in his effort to rise to the top.

okay so like most of the grady hendrix books I've read so far, this was good! but it definitely wasn't the best of his books for me. that crown is deserved for how to sell a haunted house. but we sold our souls is a pretty fun romp, that definitely had some chilling moments that made you paranoid right along with kris. you couldn't trust the people around you. you never knew who - or what - might be watching.

and there was a part 68% in that was so upsetting that I just closed the audiobook and hopped out the libby app. like I was done for the day, shit was rough.

but at the end of the day, this did end up being pretty mid for me. I also did not appreciate all the microagressions made about black artists and black music. could have done without that!

🌱 parable of the sower by octavia butler (3.25⭐)

in the distant future of 2024, the united states has crumbled due to climate change. resources are scarce, good water is hard to find, and people are willing to do anything and everything to make sure they can survive. at fifteen, lauren olamina lives in a community with her family, gated off and secluded from the outside dangers. lauren also struggles with hyperempathy, taking on the pain of others to a debilitating degree, and though their community is surviving, lauren knows that the security they have made for themselves won't last, and that their community needs to be ready for when that day comes. and in her efforts to find hope in such a hopeless world, lauren tries to figure out god - and creates a new faith that she believes will one day lead them to the stars.

this book was fucking ROUGH bro like.....truly on some mad max shit where it's every man for themselves. honestly I got a little tired of it a little over halfway 'cause like. idk I just can't believe that people would inherently fall back to violence in these conditions. that we'd all do what we can to help each other...I dunno. but shit was bleak! and there was a lot of sexual assault of women and girls, which I didn't appreciate. once again, probably because I cannot believe that humanity as a whole would just be so violent. but hey!

also - that relationship that happened at the end?? you know the one. what the hell was that. what is it with octavia butler and these damn age gaps jesus christ.

all in all, it was a solid middle of the road read for me. it was a little disorienting to read this in 2024, but still enlightening somewhat. idk if I'll read the next book any time soon though.

🍎 ripe by sarah rose etter (2.5⭐)

one year into her job at a startup in silicone valley, cassie is struggling; work eats away at her, long hours surrounded by coworkers and supervisors that look down and disrespect her. she barely has friends and she's making it by the skin of her teeth in an expensive city that she hates. she's lonely - but never alone, her constant, unending companion a black hole that's been with her since childhood, ebbing and flowing depending on her anxiety and depression. when her job starts demanding actions of the dubiously ethical variety and she suddenly finds herself in the family way, cassie has to decide if a life in san francisco is truly what she wants.

besties I fucking hated this book. it was literally just seven hours of this woman bitching and moaning and woe is me-ing but not really making any changes until the last fucking second. she thinks she's better than the people she works with, but still marches to their drum, pulling some pretty sketch shit against a rival startup and bringing a pakistani man into this bullshit company, knowing that he's going to get screwed, all while playing the world's smallest goddamn violin for herself. ain't that just like a white woman, smh.

and I'm sure that's the point of this book. I understand! this is supposed to be a critique on capitalism, on hustle culture, on work and how it drains the life out of you and demands so much of you only to give so little in return. I get it! truly!

but baby I am not connecting with this white woman languishing in silicon valley, throwing a whole pity party for herself but doing nothing to better her situation. I am a firm believer of hitting the fucking bricks when a situation is ass. there are better jobs out there with better coworkers in more affordable places. these people don't care about you. Real Winners Quit.

the ending was also ambiguous as a mf and I don't care enough about cassie to feel a type of way about it. my good sis, go to therapy. you can't cocaine your way out of everything.

....now I feel like even two stars is generous. hm.

0️⃣ unrated:

⛵ deep as the sky, red as the sea by rita chang-eppig

after the death of her pirate husband by portuguese sailors, shek yeung has to act fast in order to retain her power over the red pirate fleet. agreeing to marry her late husband's second in command and bear a child, shek yeung also has to contend with greater threats as china's emperor increases efforts to remove pirates entirely from the south china seas.

this book is p much based on the life of ching shih, one of the baddest female pirates to ever do it. the story was tense, with a lot of political intrigue when it came to the pirates and the different colored fleets. shek yeung is a boss ass protagonist, a woman that was made hard because of the bullshit life threw at her, but she kept her wits about her and made the best decisions she could to come out on top - and alive.

I think if I would rate this after the fact I'd give it a solid 4.75⭐! a very easy read, but tw for sexual assault - that is a big part of some of the main characters' backstories (shek yeung and the second in command specifically). the ending was a little sad, but all in all an enjoyable book.

🍄 sorrowland by rivers solomon

vern is fifteen and seven months pregnant when she escapes from the religious compound she was made to call home, fleeing deep into the woods for safety. she births her children there, and plans to raise them wild and free - but there are changes happening to her body. changes that she can't explain. and to understand the changes and protect her children, vern will have to return to the one place that she had desperately wanted to escape.

this one, oh man. what a fuckin' ride it was. vern is one of those characters that are very...prickly. she's always got her defenses up and is ready to snap at you quick fast in a hurry, and I love her. she was wild, and her twin babies are adorable - and their names are very interesting haha!

there's also a sapphic romance, which was really sweet! I was concerned for a while that I had run into another couple with a huge age gap, but it wasn't! thank fuck. parable of the sower was enough.

the story has a lot going on - examination of religion and how it can be used to exploit people that have been left behind by the world, a bit of supernatural scifi, human experimentation, and finding love and community and connection despite it all, despite trying so damn hard to make yourself an island. if I rated it now....4.25⭐

🌕 daughter of the moon goddess by sue lynn tan

all her life, xingyin has been raised in secret; living on the moon with her mother, the goddess chang'e, who was exiled to the moon for stealing an elixir of immortality, her existence has been hidden from the celestial emperor - but one can't stay hidden forever. when her existence is discovered, xingyin is forced to leave behind the only home she has ever known, and ends up in the celestial kingdom. alone and afraid, xingyin decides that she will do whatever it takes to return home - and to free her mother from her lunar prison.

I read this book because I am a sucker for pretty covers and BOY does this one deliver. I had a fun time with this book, though the prose did get a little heavy at times. but I think this is the author's first book ever? so I gave a little grace. it wasn't crazy distracting or anything lmao.

but whew! this book had a lot going on. the magic system of this world was pretty fuckin' neat, and it was cool to see xingyin find her footing in this new world and do her best to achieve her goals! I was rooting for her. there is, unfortunately, a love triangle, and it was annoying, but mostly because I am too old for that shit lmao. I was also ridiculously annoyed at how she spend like 20% of the book being a hardass to one of the love interests because of something that happened OUT OF HIS CONTROL and is kinda connected to HIS JOB but whatever. whatever!

I'll probably read the sequel as well, but not anytime soon! until then, my rating now would be....4⭐

🌿 the daughters of temperance hobbs by katherine howe

connie goodwin is a professor at a university in boston, specializing in america's history with witchcraft. a successful scholar, connie is more connected to the history of witchcraft in america than she'd like to admit - a direct descendant of a woman that was tried as a witch during the trials in salem. a series of events force connie to realize that her partner's life may be in danger, a curse tracing through her bloodline, killing any man that falls in love with a woman in her family. with time slowly running out, connie must confront her family's past, and solve the mystery behind the curse that has plagued her family for generations.

oh this one was FUN, y'all. I ate this book up quick! and apparently it's the second book in a series?? I had no idea! it stands well enough on its own that honestly I don't think I need to read the first one to understand what's going on. the main character, connie, tried my goddamn patience lmao. she is the prime example of people that are so deep in academia that their relationships kinda suffer for it. like talk to your man girl!! talk to him about this damn curse!!! and the [redacted]!!! you can't just think that he can READ YOUR MIND and just KNOW like GIRRLLLLLL.

speaking of her man, sam is just a delight. truly a darling. by the end of the book I was just like god when will it be my turn. WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN??? GOD

I also really liked the flashbacks to women in connie's family line, they were all cool as hell - especially temperance! she was neat.

and zazie.....the only woman of color in a sea of white nonsense. she is stronger than any us marine because she is a woman of color doing grad school in a predominantly white college. I know she has been through things that would make connie's hair turn white. you deserve everything you want sis, you truly do.

and I thiiiink.....4.5⭐, if I rated this book now.

🕯️ black candle women by diane marie brown

the montrose women have been living contentedly in a california bungalow for years, keeping mostly to themselves. their lives have been calm - until the youngest montrose, nickie, brings home a boy and throws their world into disarray. because the boy is a reminder. a reminder of a secret that they have kept from nickie for years - a curse. a curse that if a man falls in love with a montrose woman, then they're destined to die.

this is basically in the same vein as the daughters of temperance hobbs but with black women and black magical culture. and I LOVED it. all of the women in the montrose family - augusta, victoria, willow, and nickie - are so vibrant. they all butt heads, of course, but at the end of the day there's still love.

victoria was a little triggering at times lmao mostly because she really reminded me of my own mom at times, and LORD do we butt heads. it was worse when I was a teenager, so I really felt for nickie when her mother started tightening that leash. and willowwwww oh my god I loved herrrr. she was so chill and so full of love. and augusta! she may not be able to physically speak, but that doesn't stop her from speaking her mind!

I absolutely recommend this - if you want a story about generations of black women working through misunderstandings, beating a curse that has dogged their heels for years, and loving each other despite the bumps along the way, then read this!! read it!! if I rated this now, I think I'm giving it a solid 5⭐

❌ DNF:

💀 gideon the ninth by tamsyn muir

reason for DNF: the writing made me wanna die a little? it was very like.....if you like homestuck and think it's still funny, then this book will work for you. it did not work for me. also, all the fucking names were so hard to keep track of. but mostly it was just the writing - all those quips! I am not a teenager, this shit isn't funny to me anymore please relax.

🏡 the haunting of hill house by shirley jackson

reason for DNF: I just didn't like the audiobook 😭, I'm gonna try and check out a physical copy when I can...I think I'll like it more if I'm actually READING it.

and that's it! that's my may wrapup! this was more work than I expected, whew. but! if anyone gives these books a read, or has read them before, let me know your thoughts!

[sleeperagentclone]

30, 37, 79 for the unusual asks!

30: Usually I go for citrus but right now I have a coconut and pineapple candle I really like, I think it was bath and body works that had a scent called like "moonlight stroll" or something that I really liked as a kid

37: I used to read a lot as a kid but than I got hit with ocd + whatever is wrong with a lot of peoples attention spans nowadays and I probably haven't read a full book in a decade? Even a mutlichapter fanfic is a bit too heavy of a lift for me now.

I do play a lot of choice of games and hosted games games, which is text based choose you own adventure so very much like reading a book

AND, very exciting, I am very close to finishing my first book in maybe a decade, many thanks to my library card and the libby app for that

As for a favorite book, I have no fucking clue, when I finished Wicked there was an instant feeling of like absence that it was over and I wanted to reread it right away, Princess Bride, Stardust, and Ella Enchanted are all amazing books with equally amazing movies, I devoured the Percy Jackson books as a kid but I'm kinda on the fence with them now given the authors stance on Palestine, Nancy Farmer, Neal Shusterman, and Scott Westerfield all have both series and books that I love, there's a children's(?) biography of Woody Guthrie that I absolutely adore, idk

79: No :( I think it would be cool if supernatural stuff was real but I can't act like I think it is. I for sure think that things and places can be haunted but I think that's all like physiological in our head type of shit