uniformloners

[fruit-salad-ship]

The Royal AU got me thinking. Dragon Peach (can turn into a human form), Knight Grey and kidnapped Nobel Plum for the trio. The Dragon kidnaps the nobel of a very influential house and the brave knight is sent to save them. Turns out the Dragon "kidnapped" the Nobel because she was being forced into an arranged political marriage but has also started to like the tiny human.

I so wanted to draw more for this but im HELLA busy, someone remind me, or put an ask in my box or something idk. I'll circle back round to this because peach dragon slaps.

Certainly the people of the city feared the creature that dwelled in the swamps. It only showed itself from time to time, usually keeping to the distance, hunting wild deer, perhaps attacking caravans that strayed too close to its home, but for the most part, it kept to itself, filling its home with thick smog to fend off anything stupid enough to try to enter, theyd surely lose their way. MORE STORY BELOW.

There was a distinct joy in the realm, a brief moment of peace where people focused their attention on a regal wedding, speedily approaching, streets adorned with banners and galands, it was truly a spectacle. Everyone was excited, everyone that was, except the bride. She'd been keen to run her fathers buisness, perhaps grow the trade routes, focus on her work, instead being paired up with a man not more than 10 years her elder, another from a high society family. Despite her pleading, the young woman was fated to marry, and be a second seat to her husbands triumphs. No freedom of her own.

The wedding came around fast, every noble house attenting, a great cost, and quite frankly the worst day of the young womans life. She was doomed to an ordinary, subdued life with this. A shackle on her ankle in the shape of a middle aged man with nothing that even remotley interested her.

Walking down that isle in the finest gown money could buy made her want to turn and run until she couldnt anymore, it was as if the roar that shook the room suddenly was a...relief? It happened so fast, screams, the crashing of glass, a huge ornate window ahead being broken into a million pieces, the head of their local swamp dwelling dragon appearing in a glittering, smoke filled moment, the glowing pink from its neck as the smog filled the space, stinging lungs and eyes alike. The noble woman felt fear of course, but watching her husband to be get snapped in half by mighty jaws was quietly a small joy. Her legs didnt work, falling back to try to get away. Guards appeared, started shooting bolts at the beast but none even scratched the hide, their futile attempts brushed aside with one mighty sweep of its taloned paw.

The woman managed to crawl a fair distance away, thinking her efforts quite good, until that is, cold sharp digits stamped on the long train, stupid dress was her undoing, falling again. It scooped her up in a secure clawed grip, giving a bone shaking roar, before loosing a blast of gas, pinkish hue, filling the room. It turned, exited the window, and looked back, a different breath, this time of flame ignighting its previous move, the entire space going up in flames with a mighty rush of air.

As it flew off with great broad strides of its wings, the screams of terror and pain echoed, the young woman knew she'd never escape this, she'd be taken back to its lair and eaten for sure.

What followed was however quite the opposite. She watched the swamp come into view, her captors home where it landed on a solid little hill of dirt and shrubs. It gently put her down, her feet still refusing to work, legs jelly with every attempt to get up. It did not eat her, did not snap or roar, no thick fog escaped it's gils, it just sat and watched. After a while the woman managed to get to her feet, holding a falled tree for stability.

"W-What youre just toying with me then?!" her ferocity was amusing for a human, and the dragon shifted to lie down, closer to her head height somewhat. This of course spooked the mainden who tripped backwards on the long dress, every second passing it became more soggy and dirtied, the white quickly dimishing in the swamps.

The dragon used it's long tail to rummage in the shrubs around it, the clanking of metal as it pulled a human backpack, bits of human remains falling from it, nothing but bones. It dumped the items near the woman and waited, she didnt get the hint, starting to relaise this form perhaps wasn't the best for this job. It loathed being in it's puny human body, but seeing as this wasnt working, it had no choice.

The dragon shut its eyes and huffed, the smoke exhaled allowing it to shift from its huge battle ready body to something more familiar. The bride saw this happen, expecting to be eaten once again, but the smoke clears and she sees the towering form of a woman, easily 7ft, strong build, the gils on her neck still there, less obvious, eyes still very much draconic, horns present, but otherwise she was a battle scared adult woman with ridiculously long hair...completly naked. She shrieked, looked away withhot cheeks and tried to get up again. This was at least less intimidating...sort of.

"Human, take the gear and go. You're free to leave this place." What? She looked over, the dragon rummaging around to find a pretty tatty looking robe, throwing it on loosly. "Youre not going to eat me?" "Contrary to popular belief, not all dragons like to eat people. You dont exactly constitute a full meal to something our size." As she spoke the woman noticed the presence of a lot of very sharp teeth in her mouth, less daunted as she perched on a tree stump and wiggled her feet, mindlessly amused with the human form she was taking, more so than focusing on anything else. "Oh...but...why did you take me in the first place then?" The dragon shrugged, the mess of hair it had falling in unruly ways as it glanced over. "I could feel your misery a mile away. Figured i'd give you a second chance at living, you humans sure like to make choices that bring about a lousy quality of life. I rid you of the issue plaguing you, and now you can go wherever you like without concern for a useless partner." The woman though scared stepped closer, a single pace, then another. "But...why? You could have left it alone." why meddle in human affairs? The dragon had no need to.

"You do not recall me, and so theres no need to dwell on it. I owed you, and now I do not. a Debt repaid." This was news to her, she'd never seen this beast before, not to her recollection, instead of leaving, sitting beside her. "Remind me." The more time ticked by, the less scary this felt, other than her beastly apperance, she was just a large woman now, the bride could settle her nerves and try to make some sense of this. No longer a captor in her mind, her rescuer, this monster, looked to her with subtle surprise, one eyebrow raised.

"You were just a child. Your family crossed into the swamps to reach the city, pausing to rest your horses briefly. You wandered off into the fog, the other humans werent watching you, and you had no fear of this place." Peach ruminated on the memory, it felt like just the other day, but years clearly flew by since then, she'd not seen the child again since then, and now here she was, an adult. "I'd been defending my home from soldiers, but an arrow was lodged deep in my leg, couldnt get it out, had accepted to just live with it, wasn't that bad. But you came along and you were too small to feel afraid of me." Plum sat and tried to remeber, she must have been so young, her father told her the story of her getting lost here, but he didnt know what happened, no one did. Except this dragon, and now her again. "Well you got the arrow out after a lot of difficulty, so I sent you back to your people so you'd not get eaten here."

There was quiet, the two women sitting in the humid space, sounds of bugs all over, before the little noble laughed, shocking the dragon. "What?" "It's kind of fate, right?" Plum shuffled to face her companion and grinned, still amused by this all. "I'll stay with you! You must know so much, you could teach me, and when I go home, i'll be able to do so much more to help everyone!" The dragon couldnt register that set of words, ticking them over, expression thrown as the human took her hand, holding it gently, a feeling never experinced before, a soft touch. "uh-" "Good! It's settled then!" With gusto the little woman stood and went to the backpack, puling a rusted sword, using it to cut her ridiculous dress down to a managable length "This isnt a good idea, hey- lady" Plum was already briskly trotting over to the highest point, its ground solid and sturdy, behind her the towering woman keeping up with a casual pace. There was no talking her out of this it would seem.

Over the weeks the pair built a small shack, the dragon thieving supplies from others, merchant carts with fine things, farmhouses, the odd caravan of travellers, leaving gold as requested by her small human companion, a dumb but soft hearted addition to her looting. She complied, it kept her company happy. Plum had found great joy in the dragons company, they'd share stories by the fire, nothing feeling more freeing than not having hand maids on your heels, no fine dining or fancy dances, no corsets, no stupid shoes with pinched toes, just living humbly out in the swamps, with a monsterous creature. Then came the first ever chance to fly. The noble had ruined her clothes, working, exploring, living, and it was becoming an issue now, she needed some new gear, so her dragon companion, her large scaled body lowered down, let her climb up on her back, and off they went. Terrifying as it was, she knew it was safe, and soon the fear melted away. If she could, plum would never come down again, a true delight to be up there, where no one else goes. They raided a nobles estate away for the winter, and scarpered without them even noticing, a whole new wardrobe.

This peaceful company continued for a while, but nothing good lasts. Peach was taking a rest, huge dragon body splayed out in the sun that filtered through the swamp trees, content, while plum sat by her little home with a book, a calm moment. That peace was broken, a javellin came soaring through the air, in from the top, falling with skill and good aim directly into the body of the beast. Peach felt sharp pain, a stiff metal rod sinking below her tough scales, whipping up with a fierce roar, using one clawed hand to try to get it out of her neck, failing. Plum was with her in an instant, trying to get a grip on it but the blood slicked the metal, making it difficult to grasp. A gentle push with one clawed foot moved her out of the way to saftey, back by the house, Peach standing with a menacing sneer, hearing the footfall approaching.

A knight from the city stepped forward, his gear flawless despite the swamp, another javelin in hand, sword at the ready on his belt. Plum recognised the insignia, one of her fathers men, was he tasked to finding her? She was not sure yet, but had to stop this. She ran between the dragon and this man, shouting to him to stop, go no further, to which he obliged, shocked.

"Youre alive?!" his voice faltered a little, not daring to remove his helmet, eyes still on the dragon who was glaring daggers at him. He watched the noble woman turn to the monster and soothe it, a private word between the two of them that he didnt catch, and for now, the beast tucked its wings up a little and did not seem to attack. "Yes, im alive, and you should be ashamed of yourself! First thing you do it hurt her? Thats so rude!" Baffled, the man let his shoudlers slump a little, no longer prepped to throw a weapon or draw a blade, unable to look away from the beast. "Take your stupid helmet off!" demanded, the noble woman pulling rank, to which the knight reacted to, removing it with a hesitance. He was a strong looking guy, beard, long hair tied back, not too old.

"I...I was sent to get vengance...but youre alive." His head spun, no one had survived a dragon attack before, until now that was. "You need to apolagise to her right now! Get this stupid spear out, I cant-" Plums attempt again was futile, it was really lodged in there, and from the looks of things, it would stay that way, barbed at the end to prevent it from falling back out. "I can't, it'll eat me!" "Dont be so pig headed, she's in pain and you caused it, you'll get over here and fix this right now." The man, though terrified, had to follow orders, and so he dropped the spear and took a step closer. The dragon shot a menacing toothy snarl at him, forcing him to pause, before gathering strength and taking another step with a breath. Surely if it wanted him dead it'd have done so by now...right? he was in striking distance, finally by the side of the woman who kept trying to yank the weapon out, blood coating her clothes and arms. His strong grip took over, and he half expected to see the monster recoil in pain once removed. But as the javellin tore free, it didnt even skip a beat, one eye locked onto him fiercly, he could hear the rumble in its throat, a low growl of threat, body towering over where he stood, the pain not enough to even make it blink. Nothing shook its focus from him, clearly ready to strike if he so much as put a foot out of line. His hands were stripped of the weapon, plum throwing it into the shrubs, looking at him with displeasure.

"You can't tell my family i'm here." The knight looked to her with shock. "Dont you want to go home? The Swamps no place to live." and with that he watched the dragon sit back on its haunches and pick her up, a protective, careful, gentle hold, where she was able to sit in her arms, higher up than him and feel safe from this stranger. "I am home. You can either run to tell people and try to escape her-" Plum pointed to the dragon who would not be outran. "Or you can just go home and pretend like you didnt find us. Your choice."

The issue was that he was hired as a last hope, any before him had tried to hunt for this dragon and failed, the bogs were difficult to navigate, deadly at the best of times, and constantly shouded in heavy fog. Few made it home, and they got a flogging for not having results. Plums father grew impatient at their incompetence, and a few hires previous to him, they turned up empty handed and the next day were hanged for their failures. "I can't go back without either you, or proof that it's dead." he knew he'd be dead if he did. "It's not and 'it', it's a 'her'." corrected by the noble, he repeated. "Before she's dead." Truth be told he was fascinated with what he'd found. Everything he'd ever known about dragons deemed them nightmares of the sky, they brought death and destruction wherever they went, this one was supposedly no different. He'd never been this close to one and not been fighting for his life.

"Perhaps we can come to come kind of arrangement then." A sly grin came over the little womans features, and Grey knew she had a plan.Wether it was a good one or not, was yet to be decided.

[bunnieswithknives]

GET HIS ASS FLOWERS! GET HIS ASS!!

Did Flowers target Dale specifically because of him shooting his own son?

Yes! Sort of. But don't mistake anything Flowers does to be out of genuine good will

[egophiliac]

LEON

LEON YOUR EYEBALLS

[nocek]

A little continuation in my Gabriella lives au that already happened here and here.

So my another little headcanon, besides that Miguel is awkwardly attempting here to sorta adopt Gwen and is trying to figure out how to convince her to go back to school, is the night routine.

So Miguel (who read too many parenting guides* to catch up quickly and not fuck up this precious child) strongly believes in leading by example. So since he wants Gabriella to have good sleeping habits after her nightly routine he also goes to sleep at sensible hour. But he can't sleep through whole night so when he wakes up at ungodly hour he does some light work not to wake up her.

Then he prepares breakfast and bento (he totally had to learn to cook, you can't convince me otherwise) and with time he started having a little fun with it and then it became kinda hobby. It helps him wind down so that after he sends Gabriella to school he is actually able to take an extra 1-2 hour nap.

(* as in parenting guides for child of Gabriella age, totally clueless what to do with a traumatized teenager but after the denial he probably will do the homework)

[shower-phantom-ideas]

Danny is just a kid ya know? Like he is just a little guy. A baby really. 14? Tiny child! Look at him, he needs to be protected. Someone has to help this poor little dude. I mean he forgets to use his own powers to avoid attacks all the time.

Anyway cut to Batfam not knowing all of Dannys power set cause the lil dingus keeps forgetting he can do that stuff in the heat of battle.

Danny uses his invisibility all the time… to avoid being followed. But in a fight? Oopsies hes too busy thinking of funny one liners to realise he could do that.

Intangibility? Give the guy a break. I mean who calls themselves condiment king. Even he was stunned.

He so rarely actually uses his biggest advantage powers that the League doubt he actually has them. He, like any naive child, trusts them and reported fully on his power set. Instead of just asking him to demonstrate his powers they instead start watching him and try to find evidence of his powers.

At least they know duplication was true since they watched him make a copy of himself to go to the bathroom and not miss any of his fav tv show.

[applestruda]

"They never left the desert"

[minty364]

DPXDC Prompt #61 part 1

Danny didn’t like thinking about his old life. He was born to a family of assassins and as soon as he was out he never looked back. He had to fake his death and he changed his name, as far as anyone knew Damian Al Ghul had died on a mission to America. He was determined to keep this secret to the grave. Of course he knew who his dad was, Bruce Wayne was a prominent figure and he knew if we went there his secret would get out and he never wanted to be forced to be an assassin again. Once was enough. 

Danny knew he had a soft heart, his adoptive parents, the Fentons and Jazz had told him so. Jazz knew he didn’t have the greatest childhood or past but she never pried, she understood his business was his and wouldn’t let her own curiosity get the better of her. The only issue their family had was their parents obsession with ghosts. Damian never believed in ghosts, the entire thing sounded like a hoax. He probably never would have believed in them but then life happened. 

Danny believed, but it was kind of hard not too after everything that happened. When he had turned 14, his parents finished their biggest project yet. A portal to the ghost zone, of course it doesn’t work at first and his parents were very disappointed. Danny felt conflicted about the whole thing. On one hand he wanted his parents to succeed and he wanted them to be happy, on the other the portal was the reason he ate alone with his sister at night. He wanted a normal family life, something he was never allowed back at the league. 

He did something so stupid that night.

After his parents along with his sister were asleep, he crept down to the basement and stood in front of the empty hole in the wall. He looked around the outside of it first but nothing seemed to be out of place. Then he stepped into it and before he got too far into it something happened. He knew there were a lot of cords on the floor and thought he had avoided them all, but as he realized he was quickly being acquainted with the floor, he out of instinct held his hand out to catch himself on the wall. Right onto the ON button.

He didn’t remember much but pain after that.

A lot happened in the year after the portal was turned on but Danny thought he was taking things well. His sister found out about everything sooner than he liked but having someone to help him was something he didn’t realize he really needed until then. The ghost attacks were frequent and Danny was having trouble finding the time for school, friends, and fighting ghosts that the assistance helped a lot. 

Danny sat at as desk in Mr. Lancers class, who was going on about the play Hamlet. Danny was only half paying attention, he was preoccupied thinking about the latest conversation he had with Clockwork. Danny was recently crowned prince after his victory over Pariah Dark. He didn’t want the crown, ancients knew what Grandfather would do if he ever found out, but he had no other option but to accept. The conversation left him rather drained and it felt like every word his teacher spoke bled together. 

He eventually made his way to lunch and before he could make it to his destination a blue mist wafted out of his mouth. Sighing he ran out of the room to find a place to transform. Once he was Phantom he wasted no time finding the ghost. Of course it was Boxie. 

Before he had time to even fight though a portal opened up right besides Danny and he was kicked in by the Box Ghost. The world seemed to swirl around him until he landed harshly onto some pavement. The pavement was a roof and he appeared to be in a city. 

Not just any city he soon realized as he looked over to a bank that had the words ‘Gotham Bank’ brightly plastered on the front.

Shit… Danny wanted to avoid something like this, unfortunately the portal was already gone. 

After taking a moment to think about his predicament he decided the best course of action was to call Jazz.

He took a look around the rooftop he was on and when he didn’t see anyone he transformed back. 

Pulling out his cell from his pocket he pulled up his sister's contact on it and hit the call button. 

His sister took a bit longer than usual to answer but the hesitation in her voice caused him to pause, “H-hello?”

“Jazz, it’s Danny, we’ve got a code green,”  he knew setting up code colors with his sister would come in handy. Red meant he was gravely injured, yellow meant the ghost got away and he was in pursuit, blue meant he caught the ghost, and green meant he fell through a portal or something similar. 

There was silence on the other line for a moment and Danny was almost going to say something else but she spoke, “How do you know my name?”

Master Post:

Next:

[cfffrk]

[blujaydoodles]

it's ice cream season, babes

(inspired by this)

[netmors]

"Firewolf and the Voiceless Bird" - mini-comic about Eli and Karyn.

+ bonus:

[marley-manson]

the topic is Trapper and the army as foils, you have three hours, go

In no small part the satire of Mash, particularly in the first half of the show, is tied up with gender performance.

The army represents traditional, stifling and violent masculinity. This is shown through everything from freudian jokes about guns (eg Frank and Margaret's flirtations in The Sniper or The Gun), to Margaret trying to cajole Hawkeye into performing a more traditional standard of masculinity while treating him like a soldier in Comrades in Arms Part 2, to many jokes and comments about (usually) Hawkeye not being a real man in contrast to army standards and various specific army personnel (eg Lyle in Springtime, Flagg in White Gold), to Frank and Margaret's worship of the masculinity of the army ("He's twice the man you'll ever be," re: Flagg and Hawkeye, Margaret's lust for MacArthur, Frank pursuing the sniper in The Sniper in an attempt to be a "real man" in Margaret's eyes, etc) to many jokes positioning the military as a sexually aggressive man pursuing Hawkeye ("Sure, the sun the moon the stars, your high school letterman jacket. Same deal I promised nurse Baker." "A receipt please, and promise you'll go out with other doctors," etc.)

In contrast, the main characters all fail to perform traditional gender in some way, from crossdressing to immaturity to indecisiveness to peacefulness to Margaret's masculinity and Frank's pathetic failure to live up to his own masculine ideals, to just about everything about Hawkeye. His cowardliness, his jokes about not being a real man, his jokes about taking the feminine role in sexual encounters with men and women, even multiple double entendres about his average at best penis size.

Trapper is the most traditionally masculine of the main cast. He still subverts masculinity in some subtle ways here and there, such as the occasional feminizing joke and mentions of not being in great shape, but overall he's the more butch counterpart to Hawkeye's fem. He plays the role of boxer while Hawkeye plays the role of diva in their respective manager/star roleplaying episodes. He's broader and buffer and plays football, often seen playing catch with someone while walking around the compound, while Hawkeye disdains sports and doesn't participate. He reads Field and Stream which Hawkeye derides in Alcoholics Unanimous while making a wry comment about shaving his armpits. A past lover nicknamed him Big John.

And there are many, many jokes about Hawkeye and Trapper being sexual partners. The recurring Uncle Trapper and Aunt Hawkeye gag, if my father sees this you'll have to marry me, for me? only if you put those on, your father and I will tell you what we did to have you, that's when I fell in love with him, etc etc etc. It's constant. In these jokes Hawkeye usually takes the feminine role, though not strictly every time ("Me and the missus," is one exception in As You Were, the dance in Yankee Doodle Doctor is another).

Trapper's masculinity is differentiated from traditional military masculinity in a few ways. Most obviously, Trapper abhors the military's violence. He never uses guns and mocks Frank's obsession with them, he's a healer rather than a soldier, and he's disgusted by the results of military violence on the men on his operating table.

He's also secure in himself. The military's brand of masculinity is strongly characterized by insecurity and overcompensation. Frank is the main representative of this military insecurity - a coward who insists he's brave (The Army Navy Game), a man who clings to a phallic gun to compensate for his sexual and gendered inadequacies (a main theme of The Sniper, perfectly mirrored when the army itself comes in with a vastly disproprotionately powerful automatic machine gun on a helicopter to shoot down one sixteen year old), a homophobe repressing his own attraction to men (As You Were, the original script of George), etc. We also see this in Flagg, who implicitly sublimates sexual urges into violence (seen when he suggestively caresses his gun while describing how he wants to torture a boy in Officer of the Day).

Trapper doesn't need to overcompensate. He's well-endowed physically, he's portrayed as a competent and considerate lover, he's a brave man who doesn't mind being seen as a coward, and he may or may not be attracted to men but either way he's not a homophobe (George) and he doesn't express his sexuality through violence. When Margaret proves herself stronger than him, his response is to be impressed rather than offended (Bombed). When he dances with Hawkeye for a gag, he doesn't mind letting Hawkeye lead.

He's also differentiated in terms of tradition, with the mliitary representing a more propagandic 50s traditionalism, and Trapper representing a 70s, countercultural freedom from tradition. We see this in the way Trapper has plenty of sex despite being married, while adultery is a court-martial offense in the military. It's notable that he's open and carefree about it, while Frank and Margaret are surreptitious and hypocritical in their affair. This lack of traditionalism is also shown in his disrespect for authority, often in direct contrast to Frank and Margaret's worship of it, and his allyship to George who the military would persecute for his sexuality.

So ultimately we can see that while Trapper and the military are both examples of masculine performance, Trapper's masculinity differs from the military's in being more flexible, less violent, less traditional, and more secure. The military's masculinity is far more toxic than Trapper's, particularly in the context of 70s counterculture media, which aligns womanizing with sexual liberation rather than a lack of respect for women, accurately or not.

This contributes to their respective dynamics with Hawkeye.

Hawkeye, we've established, is usually more feminine, and there are a myriad of jokes characterizing Trapper as his sexual partner, as well as the military as a sexual pursuer.

The jokes Hawkeye and Trapper make about their relationship tend towards cozy domesticity. They're Radar's "aunt and uncle," they directly roleplay marriage ("Martha, we're going to have to move, the people upstairs are impossible,") and less directly behave as though married (the bickering in Alcoholics Unanimous, the discussion about naming their pony in Life With Father). Occasionally they're treated as a healthy couple in contrast to Frank and Margaret's toxicity ("While I'm gone, promise you'll go out with other doctors," vs "Touch anyone else and I'll cut off your hands" in Aid Station).

In some instances the jokes lean towards predatory - "If you're trying to get me drunk, it'll work," or "Who is this man in bed with me?" "I followed you home from the movies," but they're always playful, always fond. If Hawkeye takes on a submissive or victimized role in these jokes, it's one he has fun with and discards just as easily in the context of the rest of his relationship with Trapper.

So, it's important to note that Hawkeye and Trapper support each other and look after each other in an equal, enthusiastic friendship. From Trapper ensuring Hawkeye gets to sleep in Doctor Pierce and Mr. Hyde, to Hawkeye supporting Trapper when he wants to adopt a child, to Trapper right at Hawkeye's side as they attempt to procure an incubator, they are there for each other every step of the way. If their relationship is a marriage in some ways, it's a healthy, strong, and non-traditional marriage, an equal and open partnership free of jealousy and insecurities.

Compare that to the military's relationship with Hawkeye. In jokes it's characterized as powerful and predatory, far from an equal partnership. Sometimes it approaches positive - in Carry on Hawkeye, much of the humour is derived from Hawkeye and Margaret's gendered role reversal as she assumes military command of the unit. Hawkeye playfully calls her sir, seductively lies on her desk like a secretary in a porn film, and most notably treats an immunization shot as sexual penetration in a prolonged gag about sexual role reversal. Hawkeye has fun playing a sexually submissive role to a representative of military authority in this episode, but it is a submissive role.

Several of the one-off jokes have a similar sensibility, such as the double entendre of "My bellybutton's been puckering and unpuckering all day," in response to a representative of MacArthur assuming their excitement over the general's arrival to the unit, or Hawkeye's "Okay, take me, I'm yours," to Colonel Flagg. They demonstrate a willingness to play the receptive role on Hawkeye's part, but they also, pointedly, disturb the object of the jokes.

When Hawkeye makes these jokes that sexualize military authority, he's attempting to be provocative as well as defiantly drawing disruptive attention to his own powerlessness as a drafted surgeon. The power dynamic between Hawkeye and the authority of the military only goes one way, and Hawkeye gets a kick out of pointing it out in ways that perturb the representatives of that authority, but it's a power dynamic that takes its toll on him.

Many of Mash's plotlines revolve around Hawkeye rebelling and attempting to seize some scrap of agency back from the military. Adam's Ribs, for example, in which he starts a mild riot over the food he's being fed and spends the episode attempting to procure barbecue ribs from Chicago (which Trapper procures for him), or Back Pay where he tries to charge the military for his forced labour. A particularly notable example is Some 38th Parallels, in which Hawkeye complains about being paid the equivalent of a nickel per operation, and his frustration manifests in impotency until he can perform a gesture of rebellion against the military.

One unfortunate consistency of these episodes is that the army ultimately retains its power. When Hawkeye achieves his goals, it's only in small ways that do little more than satisfy his own need to assert his sense of self. Often, Hawkeye doesn't achieve his goal at all, but is thwarted by the army, such as in For Want of a Boot. In every instance he remains powerless in comparison to the authority of the military.

So the context in which Hawkeye makes these sexualized jokes about the military literally fucking him is one of abject helplessness. In a sense, all he's capable of is pointing out what the military is doing and putting it in his own, audacious terms. He's not capable of preventing it. His jokes usually have an edge of bitterness to them in delivery, and when they don't, that tone is imparted anyway by the greater context.

With Trapper, Hawkeye can play-act a marriage or an assault, but in either case he's an enthusiastically consenting, equal partner. Trapper's performance of masculinity allows for Hawkeye to take any role from victim to wife to husband, and enables Trapper to respond in kind from a position of equality and respect. The military, in its insecure, domineering performance of masculinity, is a dictatorial authority, never allowing Hawkeye perform any role but a feminized, victimized one, and only ever giving him the choice of whether to perform with a wry smile or a sneer.

In short, Trapper is the cool, considerate service top to the military's insecure domineering boyfriend.

I'm tagging everyone who enabled this lol, share the blame. @beansterpie @majorbaby @professormcguire @rescue-ram

[beaulesbian]

with this being the preview for the next ep, and the beginning of gear 5 luffy-vs-lucci fight,

I went to reread one piece chapter 1070, and can't wait even more to see this fight animated in the next few eps! so much loony tunes and goofs ahead!

endlessly spinning luffy:

giant luffy trying to eat-attack lucci:

and of course, creating those funny glasses out of his fluffy hair while he makes a slingshot out of himself:

I can't wait to see this all in color!

[duskydrawings]

The Pale King and His Pure Vessel

[shimmershy]

Undertale Month Day 11: Grillby

[al-luviec]

I got so insanely mad while drawing this

+ closeup and normalness

[badolmen]

the effo…