#i get sad about it bc i work at a school so my schedule is v rigid and i teach drama so im always there way later than i should be

[figuerockfaeth]

.

[hotluncheddie]

New anon here... I've been thinking about the government shoving Eddie into witness protection without letting him say goodbye to the rest of the group, which is a real bummer Steddie-wise because they were definitely headed towards something. So Eddie is like, in the suburbs of Chicago or somewhere under the new name Nathan Edwards or something, gets a slave wage job at a Scoops Ahoy, and proceeds to eat his feelings.

A couple years later, Steve is passing through the area, sees the Scoops, and thinks what the hell, he's doing pretty well for himself these days at whatever "fuck you dad I can make it on my own" career he ended up choosing, he can go in and tip some fresh outta high school kid the way he'd always appreciated back in his Starcourt days. And wow, the guy behind the counter definitely isn't a teenager, but he does look familiar...

:0 anon!!!!!

i’m hoping by saying he eats his feeling in the ice cream shop that we’re on the same page here… (bc oof 🥴👹)

but ugh witness protection is so sad omg but big hurt/comfort possibilities maybe i think i think

they make them leave straight out of the hospital, him and wayne and one box of stuff each. they give them new names, a new place, set wayne up with a new job. but it’s not the same, nothing is, never will be. eddie has to cut his hair, thankfully not a buzz cut but he hasn’t had his curls sit above his ears in years. it’s the thing that makes his feel most strange, he thinks - not recognising himself in the mirror.

recovering physically took a long time, mentally, just as long. but eventually he needs to be around people again, needs money, a routine. the scoops job started as kind of a joke and then he realised it was the place he applied with the easiest commute and the owner was a really chill dude at the interview and then it really wasn’t a joke anymore. eddie worked a scoops ahoy. the pay is whatever but the work is fine and with wayne’s wage they more than get by and while it’s boring, it also kind of feels like breathing room, time to slow down and learn about himself again, after everything.

after a while eddie is actually kind of digging the sailor outfit, gives him an excuse to be kind of silly and get away with way more with customers that he should. like you can’t really get mad at him, not dressed like that, not when he still gets the orders right. it feels like a character, he’s the bard, the jester, and one day he’ll break free but for now - he enjoys the free icecream.

it started small, employees are allowed one item in break and he usually went for a soda, then that changed to a milkshake or a cone. and then one night he was closing and it was right by wayne’s birthday and there was a quarter of a tub set to be thrown out. and, well, eddie thought, why not take it home?

then the new monthly schedule comes out and since most of the part timers are younger and he has his (new) van it’s got him set to closing alone most shifts. fine by him, one hour of pay where he can blast his walkman while he cleans, best case scenario even.

he was also in charge of making sure the tubs were correctly filled ready for the openers and that meant throwing out the near empty ones. so near empty that that kid in eddie seems to rear up and remind him of all those times they couldn’t afford icecream, why let it go to waste? he always did have a sweet tooth.

so most nights his routine after work is to get home, have dinner with wayne, get high, watch some tv or read or listen to music and most notably polish off whatever ice cream and ‘only just out of date so still definitely good’ toppings he’s managed to squirrel home.

that last bit is notable because it’s been a year of working there, just under a year of this new routine, and eddie’s had to size up his once baggy uniform.

he’s kept definition in his legs and arms since his job is running around and scooping frozen shit. but now he’s padded with a layer of chub and his stomach is padded with a lot more than that, having bared the brunt. his cheeks have also rounded and his thighs and ass are honestly looking better than ever.

and with everything so new that’s been forced on him, this new at least feels like his. he knows how it happened, he’s not dumb, and yeah sometimes he ate just to wallow but he enjoyed every fucking bite of that ice-cream. and yeah he knows the red stripes that streak up his sides and push agains the waistband of his shorts aren’t everyone’s idea of desirable but, this is him now. everything else in his life is new, may as well have a new body to go with it. and to be honest he finally feels like he’s recognising himself in the mirror now. this new guy he’s had to become, there are ways that it’s still his.

but god does he miss everyone. not a day goes by he doesn’t think of home, his friends, his life, the people he almost died with. steve. so every night he gets high and eats ice cream and feels his belly swell that little bit more. sometimes he cries, sometimes he laughs but he’s alive and he has wayne and they’re safe. so every night he eats icecream.

-

steve moves to chicago with robin. he’s in school to be a physical therapist, robin studying italian. they moved just outside the city because it’s cheaper, a nice little neighbourhood. hes getting by, he works at a gym and helps with some of the classes, it’s decent pay and fun and he’s getting more and more days where that darkness feels far away, his rain cloud isn’t so thick. he’s doing it, surviving. living, even.

but, every day he misses eddie munson.

he’s out jogging when he spots it, taken a new route and made it to a strip of stores he didn’t know were there. with a scoops ahoy. just like summer of ‘83.

he laughs.

for old times sake and knowing robin will get a kick out of it he head in inside. thinks the 20 in his sock is more than enough to have spare for a tip that should brighten whatever kid is working the counter. surely they don’t still have the same unifo- nope, they do, and the guy at the counter looks much closer to steve’s age than the high schooler he expected. he’s cute. big eyes, nice hands.

-

eddie’s frozen. there’s a spectre in his store. steve’s staring at him. eddie’s stares at steve. eddie’s suddenly filled with anxious energy, unsure how to process what’s in front of him. tugs at his shirt out of habit, smooths the fabric down over the plush of his stomach, readjusts his hat that doesn’t need readjusting, bounces on his toes. what the fuck.

and eddie sees that steve doesn’t quite recognise him with his rounder features and shorter hair. he can’t wear his rings to work (they’re different, gold but still chunky) and, obviously steve’s never seen him dressed like this, also probably never imagined eddie would have a belly like that.

the second thing that registers in eddie, after the initial shock, is feeling his stomach drop out in fear. for wayne. for their place. for his job… for steve.

he doesn’t remember what the rules were about contact with his past. but he’s pretty sure there were rules on it.

but then something flickers across steve’s face, a flash of lightning, and he’s moving, leaning across the counter and enveloping eddie in a hug. ‘oh thank god.’ eddie hears steve breathe, strained and relieved and so full of emotion eddie feels his throat close and his eyes burn. steve’s here. eddie squeezes back and breaths deep, he smells like sweat and hairspray and home.

his steve is here.

and all eddie can do is cling back.

they’ll have to figure something out. he can’t let go of this again.

[studentbyday]

week 2 / small commitments challenge

Sometimes I think too much about the intermediate (a few months from now) and far future (a year or years from now) and get so worried that I won't "make it" in whatever way I determine is "making it" for a certain goal that I can't focus very well on the present. This week, this mostly happened at night when I finally go to or get ready for bed. The ochem midterm is coming up, which is forcing me to stay in the present more during the day. I think if that wasn't happening, I would be even more of a runaway train 😭 And yet when I focus on school, I just feel so sad being cooped up indoors, where I focus best, when the weather is so nice outside. The second half of the semester is always the hardest on my psyche. I want to remember why I'm doing this. But the reason is out there in the world, not at my desk...

In other news, I adjusted my study routine so that I try to do an hour of learning R (typically first thing...at first I tried for 2h but that never happened and I just felt discouraged), followed by ochem work, then driving practice. Much less overwhelming BUT still making decent progress on the highest-priority side projects when I can keep up with them... I'll need to keep at this routine or smth similar for a while tho because I fell off the bandwagon towards the end of the week, trying to focus on ochem. Whenever I end up feeling ready, I want to add in an hour of math bc that will open many doors for understanding cool computational biology stuff...or maybe I'll add in some music theory instead... Who knows, my priorities may change again by that point. 🤷🏻‍♀️ One step at a time! 👣 I also struggled to stick to a consistent sleep schedule this week...again. Briefly, before this challenge, I had been able to do this while I was on habitica...but then the novelty faded and I stopped keeping myself accountable for it as I tried to keep track of everything else on the app lol. So now I'll just use habitica to keep track of my sleep/wake times, using the minus button when I miss out on the habit. I also struggled with the meditating thing...meditation is one of those things where the benefits are subtle and last longer the more regularly I do it, so I think I just have to stick with it until that happens and serves as a stronger motivator...Maybe I'll just make meditating at night the "mandatory" one since that really helps me feel peaceful enough to sleep. Aaand I completely forgot about exercise. I haven't been doing that consistently either this week 🙃 Lots of room for improvement. 🪄

[crushingcasanova]

im so glad that you’re ok with it !! trust me, i will be spamming you .. >:3 I ALSO GET REALLY EXCITED !! and to be honest, ive been really excited to talk to you .. its been a really long day .. (i will explain soon .. also i was typing this and it got deleted and it was rlly long so now im sad bc I have to rewrite so im having trouble so it might not be as long :( im sorry ml )

im so glad that you had a good day !! i have more to say about the fact that you’re a performer .. BUT im so glad it went well ! i love working w middle schoolers/lil kids .. they are so sweet and kind!!

im so happy that you’re a performer!!! but i mean i shouldn’t be surprised .. of course you’re a performer i mean .. you’re wonderful ♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪ i am actually in a show (grease) and right now im at a DISTRICT HONOR CHOIR!! I don’t think that I deserved the spot but .. I’m here !! so im gonna do my best :3 ill be here till 9.. so im gonna do 2 half’s for my letter since i gotta go :( JUST ONOW I APPRECIATE YOY SM !!

too busy to put color , -🎭

I am sorry your day was long!!! I hope it's not been too busy, dearie. I've had quite a busy day too, so I'm sending you my energy in support. I just got home a little bit ago and had dinner, so here I am! (It's like 11pm ...)

The kids were so sweet,,, they loved my little fake death scene (i live, dw) and they were so eager to see the show, I was so happy :) it was lovely to interact with them; I usually don't do shows with audience interactions!

GREASE IS SOOOO COOL!!! I hope you have a ton of fun! I've never seen it but the show is so neat :D I've heard it's amazing! Totally let me know how it's going :0 also, cool we kinda have a similar schedule! Are you in tech? I've been in tech for a week (opening night is tomorrow!) so I got out at 9:30 today ... I hope it's been well!

District honors choir is so cool, too! I used to be head of a school choir but I quit bc of bad timing ... it was fun though! It must be so fun :D

Hope you're doing well! It was lovely to see you in my inbox again :D

[fumiku]

Kabrinmickuro Tinder AU

Imagine Mickbell with a tinder profile.

The AU has a Mickrin focus but there are kabrinmick and kurokabu shenanigans happening on the side so this is the schedule this is the situation buckle up, have the tangled mess that is their quartet

Ok so. Tinder AU. His tinder profile is terrible ofc and she only swipes right because they’re ex coworkers and she’d have felt bad + obligation + some pity and concern + morbid curiosity + vindication about kabru and freedom probably. So they chat and meet up but the flirting gets stamped down pretty quickly and instead they become buddies where they meet up to vent and talk.

The thing is, this is set in a modern au right, and it’s set the same year when Kabru and Rin go their own ways. College has ended and they’re going to univeristy, and Kabru picked a great medicine university… That’s on the other side of the country. He didn’t talk to her about it or ask for her thoughts at all, and Rin had assumed they’d be going to the good one in the same city they moved to attend the local college for. And she could follow him and get into the same one, but she doesn’t. Her personal arc of growing beyond Kabru and not uprooting her life and centering it around him has started and she’s like, oh, ok, fine whatever then. Kabru pretty much expected her to follow him when he told her about it even if the notion kinda annoyed him because he easily feels stifled, but he feels conflicted when instead she just goes congrats & good luck and lets him go.

MEANWHILE!! Kuro is also going away to university. Mickbell and Kuro are roommies ofc, and Mick’s a highschool dropout or just finished highschool or some such, doing jobs here and there. (Rin and him probably worked together in retail or such at one point. Rin maybe remembers Kuro as that really quiet coworker, but also it’s fun if she doesn’t know him yet too…) Kuro had followed Mickbell’s lead thus far (idk how i can make this line up with him possibly attending Kabru’s school though hmmm. Maybe kuro just never stopped education even when Mick did, just working a lot too when not in class. Maybe it’s a special university social program and that’s why Kuro gets a tutor?) but he’s been feeling a want for more. So of course Mickbell is PISSED and refuses when Kuro brings up he wants to move into an university dorm for the next semester, but unlike in canon here he’s able to just, leave. So he puts his foot down and is like, no Mick I need to experience the world for myself, I am seeking higher education!!!! Wether you approve or not!! Though he’s still gentle after with him once it sinks in for Mickbell that Kuro’s not changing his mind.

Guy who couldn’t follow his most important person to university because he doesn’t have the brains the grades or the means and girl who could follow hers but chose to let go because it was destroying her and she’s tired……..

Gbdvcjdh making a horrendous tinder profile was Mick’s way of going through the kuro breakup aftermath… Sobbing in his bed mascara running down his red cheeks as he writes "no pain no gain and baby I’ve lost consciousness from injuries several times in my life and I’m still broke rn so it’ll catch on soon and I’ll be rich just you wait everyone will be sorry for having left actually" Hitting people up in dms like a man possessed being way too agressively flirty and coming on thick bc he’s awfully coping. Rin swiping on the awful profile of her ex-coworker out of pity and morbid curiosity He posts pics of his "dates" with Rin on his socials to try and fail to make Kuro jealous (Kuro worries if anything) Mick handling the separation way worse than Rin she’s just kinda sad and melancholic and feels aimless sometimes but he’s mourninggg breaking downnn singing conceal don’t feel at 2 am

Kabru and Kuro take flights back to this city sometimes to visit~ Bc it’s like co-brainstormed with Toby this is kabrinmick and many many shoujo comedy love triangle shenanigans happens there with that but in my heart……… Kabru and Kuro having an university romance. Bromance at the very least… Maybe Kabru is Kuro’s tutor What would Kuro study… Economics… Linguistics… Psychology…. Some specific work program like idk eletric engineering……. Yeah this is the non-mickrin I was working towards. Gbdgdgd sorry, yay university romance kabukuro have all this context for the mickrin

To quote myself: In the end they become a 4 person household and everyone is uncomfortable /hj Wait in this au Kuro and Mick could actually possibly end up living apart woah what a concept

Co-brainstormed with @cranechel back in like july, more details from when we were developing it for more kabrin and nuggets of comedy gdbdg

I want the romcom sitcom bs for this AU but also in the angst route it’s 2 heartbroken people who lost their respective codependent relationship and smoking weed together in a dump after having cried a lot (their ‘dates’ lmao. Yes mick your hot date game is great. I bet he posts pics of them on his social hoping kuro sees and seethes and runs back to him) teasing that edge of having a codependent relationship themselves (cue Mick following Rin to the airport lmao)

I always have my hands in mickrin aus and timelines and this or that and lately kabrinmick also and it’s fun to me to think about kabukuro on the side there. In my vague mind relationships chart mickrin is happening kicking and screaming and then off to the side there are just Kabru and Kuro, chilling. Lmao

[memberment]

The End Is Near Updates??? (Let's fucking go, I guess???)

ALRIGHT WELL

All of my plans to get shit done before school starts continue to swirl the drain as I am full immersed in this rewrite.

I have decided to use headers and make this a single work because honestly I did not want to keep it a series so I figured it out

Also I'm at the end of book one. And SOBBING. I forgot Clyde and Kenny get married in the first round. This was literally the first fic I ever wrote them in like I'm screaming. This fic was my rare pair origin story lowk LMFAOOO like between them and butters/bebe like ugh.

My first book one was like just under 18k and I am currently slowly omw to 22k, like I am right there.

So it's looking like I'm just gonna be belting out monster-illiad length fics for a while with fun little sprinkles of 30/40ks

someone call god, tell him I need intense emotional support because the urge to post another chapter is already creeping up on me and it's been less than 24 hours. I CANNOT FALL INTO THIS SAME FUCKING TRAP AGAIN. Like I just assumed if I reworked an old fic I would throw it on post schedule and contain the same amount of self restraint that I do with my other fics but the literal worms in my brain are like *dont be shy post like 17 chapters in two hours* LIKE WHAT.

Excuse me, I'm busy being insane bc I have literally been up since three (it could have been 1:30, but I honestly can't recall) this morning LMFAO.

9:07 pm update: I took a nap to try and reduce the pure insanity I was dealing with it and I just opened my google doc and realized I'm about to start book 2. GUYS. Book two was by far my absolute fucking favorite. Like, I loved book 2. Frankly, want to make everything else feel more like book 2 bc AHHHHH IT WAS MY FAVORITEEEEE IDC WHAT ANYONE SAYS LMFAO

10:07: I just want you guys to know I reread Craig's chapter, yes his chapter, bc he now longer gets a little separated paragraph, but a chapter, and Heart to Heart came on and I started crying. And then proceeded to reread Tweek's end chapter and We'll Meet Again came on and I'm actually ready to throw up LMFAOOOOOO

(I wrote them before I went to sleep and I had to make sure they read well and blah blah whatever and now I'm just SAD. But also, what the fuck did I expect? This is what happens when you write a sad story with happy little stickers on it and a main character who despite everything wants nothing more than to be optimistic.)

9:18pm hi guys I am on my way home and yall are gonna HEAR IT IN MY END NOTES TONIGHT HOLY SHIT I GAVE TO PROOFREAD DANDELION I AM REALIZING THIS AS I TYPE IM GONNA BE SICK

anyways

I am here to rant bc I was just talking about it DOES ANYONE ELSE dislike when Bebe is portrayed as like an angel or like the opposite end of the spectrum and like straight up mean

LIKE I JUST WANNA SEE HER GIRLBOSS AND PEOPLE DO NOT WRITE HER LIKE THAT ANYMORE CAN I PLS GET SOME SUPER DYNAMIC GIRLBOSS BEBE RECS LMFAOOOOO

[betweenthings2]

talk shop tuesday!!

how’s your day been? are you working now that it’s summertime?

the first chapter of loads of crisps was so cute omg it was some much needed tenderness and fluff. (not to say i don’t love your angst and sadness) i related too hard to matty immediately wanting to adopt the kitten not thinking about the actual responsibilities that come with it lol. is this fic gonna have an upload schedule or are you gonna continue to surprise us? also did you write/come up with this fic as its own universe or is it kinda like standalone/oneshot situation put into chapters? going with that, do you see your fics (besides the big light bc we already know it’s its own universe) as their own little universes or completely independent entities? like are george and matty from the other one shots completely different “characters”?

🥤

Hi, Smoothie Anon(? Are you Smoothie Anon here? I'm going with it.)!! Thank you for the ask!! 💚💚

My day has been good--I has some orientation Zoom meetings for school, and I've been working on packing to move. I technically have a job, but I won't start actually working until wheat harvest starts here, and it's been cool and rainy here so harvest will be a little later than usual. I'm not at all upset about that--I love being a functionally unemployed freeloader =)

Thank you for the complaints about Loads of Crisps! Fictional!Matty's heart is in the right place, but he's just not really thinking things through here. At least he has fictional!George to remind him of things.

There is no update schedule as of now. It will get updated as the vibes dictate. The next chapter will be Or Something Worse, and I haven't decided if it will be fictional!George breaking his shoulder, or if I need to come up with something worse. It's my writer's block project right now, kind of like prompts often are, and my priority is Antichrist right now. I'm sure the next chapter will be done sooner rather than later, though.

Every chapter of Loads of Crisps is part of the same little universe--it's going to be a nonlinear narrative but they're all interconnected--I have a general premise for almost every chapter so I can reference future chapters as I go. Have I given this too much thought? Maybe, but the nonlinear nature is mostly because I didn't want to do the work to make it work in a linear way. The not-so-secret secret is that I'm lazy.

Excluding all of my The Big Light fics and Learning How to Lose a Thing I Never Laid a Hand On and Five, I do see all of my fics as being their own little universes. The things that are true for fictional!M+G in one are not necessarily true for others. I think it's easy to find continuity between some of my fics and I'm certainly not saying that it's somehow wrong to view certain fics as existing in the same universe, but I am, again, lazy, and want to preserve a kind of creative freedom in writing so every version of fictional!M+G are different characters in my head.

Thank you for the ask and I hope you've had/are having a wonderful day! =)

[chirpsythismorning]

I would be really sad if you quit honestly, personally I don't mind seeing the same accounts posting most of the things in the tag because y'all are carrying it. I know a long wait like this can be boring at times but something that really helped me was only checking the tag at established times everyday (like I check it when I wake up, then after lunch and before I go to sleep). That way, the posts accumulate and each time I check it I can scroll on the recent posts for about an hour and I kinda trick my mind into thinking that it's still really active. For the rest of the day, focusing on other shows or movies or hobbies of mine is what's also making time pass by so quickly for me (since it's been a year already and it feels like yesterday to me). Also being busy with school really helps me having my mind elsewhere. But I'd suggest you don't give up (take a break if you feel like it), but you can still contribute with your posts at certain times of the day, like you go on with your life but every now and then you come to the community again. Also the good part is about to begin because even if we won't be getting teasers for a while, we'll have set pictures leaked, and we'll see the characters' outfits and hairstyles, and also we can analyse sets. All of that makes me really excited, and we'll finally be able to start picturing how season 5 is gonna look like and what the plot will be!

Thank you! This means a lot!

I know there’s a decent amount of people still here despite some that have taken a step back. And we all have our reasons!

But I do love seeing both fans I recognize in the tag and new ones, doesn’t really matter if it’s repetitive to me, so I feel the same about it.

Even if I do step back a bit, I don’t think I could leave completely. If I tried I feel like something major would happen and I’d be running back anyways 🤣

I would like to utilize the scheduling posts feature though.! I have quite a bit of drafts I’ve been stalling on bc I have to get a bunch of pictures for them and that takes time. I also tend to get distracted with other ideas while I’m working on a specific post, so maybe just focusing on those big ideas I had and expanding on them, bc I do think they’re interesting concepts and they’re worth discussing in the tag.! Especially bc we’re in hiatus and all we can really do is analyze what we already have.

I’ll try to go with the same approach you have though, coming on to check the tag only a couple of times and then scrolling through it all. Then it wouldn’t feel so deserted, and then I could still contribute without being gone completely.

Thank you anon!

[crowhyun]

Life Update:

I’ve just graduated from flight attendant training, and I’ve earned my wings yall! I have about a week before I start inflight training and that’ll last about four days, and then i have another two-day training course, but as of now, I’m pretty much a fully certified flight attendant!

I’ve also finally found a place to live once I get to my base, as I was worrying about that a lot lol but things are going great.

I’m just a bit sad, because even though I felt like shit most of the time getting up so early and going to school for 10-12 hours a day, it was really fun, and I already miss seeing my classmates and talking to them everyday. We started out with 22 and ended up with 17, but it was still a big class compared to a lot of other graduating classes lol. Some of my classmates have already went on to their scheduled inflight training, and I’ll be the last one to go lol bcs mine is scheduled for the 26th, and four ppl have left already so I’m sad. My roommate is leaving tomorrow, though, and tbh I’m not sad abt that, I’ll be along in the hotel room for 4 days before I leave lol.

But yeah, I just wanted to tell y’all what’s going on. I’m finally going to get back to writing a bit for the free time I have while here, but I’m not sure if i’m going to post any works yet.

[bcofl0ve]

let me lay this out in a way that hopefully seems respectful, and brings clarity to the issue. People get agitated with you I think because you were an Austin fan, and it has shifted to Kaia. And I think that’s where a lot of the frustration for Kaia comes in. You said before you would talk more about Austin when he had things come up, but even when Bikeriders trailer came out, that didn’t seem to happen. (Understandably, you’re busy with school.) But you still talk more about Kaia. That is very much your right, and you get to talk about what you want. And if you’re more interested in Kaia now, that’s ok, but I think it should be said, so people know. I think Austin fans maybe feel like you don’t like him that much anymore. To be honest it makes me sad, because Austin had to work so hard to get where he is and he still at every moment has to “prove” himself to everyone. Even after winning awards and getting an Oscar nom. Kaia had everything in life and never had to work for it. Plus all the connections in the world. Not her fault, but it’s true. Between the two, I feel Austin needs more support and encouragement. People in Hollywood love Kaia. She doesn’t need help making friends. She has a million. Austin doesn’t get much love and he doesn’t have a lot of friends. We need to be real here. Between the two, he has more talent in acting than she does. Yet people still don’t think he’s talented because they just don’t like him. She said one line and everyone loves her. So I just wish we could promote and love Austin more.

2.) when it comes to the book, I’m fairly certain that is a book Austin has mentioned in a podcast before. I am trying to find out what it was. So it must be a book he has, and she read it because it’s at their house. I think it just grates on people if Kaia talks about something as if she has experience with it, when her boyfriend very much does. And it’s a very tough subject. It is true that she can talk about whatever subject she wants. I don’t really know why she would want to touch in that subject when the person she is living with had to experience it. But that’s in her, and I’m sure she knows if it would bother him or not.

but she didn’t talk about it. she posted a photo of the book. without a caption. and hell maybe she wants to “touch it” because she wants to understand it more now that her long term partner struggles with it?? i don’t want to be rude because you’re coming in peace but i genuinely can’t wrap my head around viewing the story she posted, or her hypothetically doing a book club on it, negatively. using it at all to criticize kaia requires making invasive assumptions that aren’t our place about how austin feels about his trauma and his boundaries and i just. can’t sorry. if it’s grating on people they need to reevaluate their parasocial relationship with austin, because it point blank shouldn’t. all that said if it was referenced in a podcast by him please do link me, i’d like to listen!

to your first point, i’m sorry but if it idk helps it has nothing to do with me liking one of them ‘more’ and everything to do with me starting law school. kaia is ‘easier’ to post about bc i can just post modeling photos/bottoms still and dip. with austin i want to *talk* about things, interviews, bikeriders etc but i unfortunately at the moment don’t have the time i wish i had for that. law school is essentially a full time job and have my days scheduled out hour by hour 7am-midnight every day including weekends. after midterms next week i can mellow out for a week or two and will be on more than i have been. but i’m very honestly tired of having to ‘prove’ my love for austin. if i have to meet a quota of posts about him to prove my fanship than yeah i guess i’m a shitty fan. i love him so dearly i’ll start crying if i think about how much i love him for too long. he means the absolute world to me and i adore him. and atp if people chose not to believe me i don’t have it in me to spend energy trying to grovel for approval when i’m busy enough.

and i do think austin has friends. by nature guys in their 30s don’t really post with their friends the way girls in their early 20s do, so we just don’t see ‘content’ of them as much.

i hope you know that any snarkiness here isn’t directed so much at you personally. it’s directed at the topics brought as a whole. all love. and i do genuinely appreciate the civility. <3

[hotluncheddie]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

ty @steddieasitgoes !! this was fun!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

16!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

26,316 (wtf)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

steddie / st only 😤

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Tiny Green Shorts 

2. Seasons change, but people don't.

3. extra credit

4. that's when boys kiss

5. pretty boy

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

YES! i luv comments! its one of the best parts of writing anything and makes it extra fun! its connecting with people!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

mmm i don't really like angsty endings. i guess Little Lamb has the most general angst but tbh that's not even gonna be a sad ending once its done - its gone have a lot of hope. maybe just high masking but again the connected part is comfort heavy

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

everything :) happy endings only in this house! 🍓 is maybe the most good vibes all the way thru piece

8. Do you get hate on fics?

its honestly a dream of mine to get cyber bullied one day, so no but if anyone wants to u can just this once

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

ya - mmmm mild d/s dynamics and graphic descriptions of bellies :)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

no - sometimes i think about doing like film inspired steddie but idk if i'll ever get around to it (like school of rock au or dead poets society au)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no???

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no! but that would be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no :) i think having to consider someone else's schedule when writing would be stressful - i am slow

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

steddieeeee 😤👌🫡💪

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i'm working on a openly bi steve / queer eddie fic and it needs a lot of editing and keeps growing and it could honestly never get done but i really hope i work it out one day (i wanna incorporate music into the like theme of the scenes somehow but i dunno if i'm capable enough for it to be good - plus rewriting is hard bc what's there is good its just not right for this)

16. What are your writing strengths?

i like to think i can write my rancid sewer goblin dream boy eddie munson pov well

and maybe dialogue, or like metaphors?? i also have a thing about rhythm when i write so hopefully that come through, like pace and flow of sentences or whatever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i have like pictures in my head and i never know how much to describe, like do i go full setting and facial expressions but then that feels like too much so idk. but ye that - the stuff around the dialogue

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i dumb baby i wouldn't even try bc it would just be google translate n that's embarrassing

19. First fandom you wrote for?

this one! i only lurked before hehe I've used ao3 for like over 10 years and this fandom was the first i ever wanted to make anything for

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

uhhh i think unmasking is very dear to my heart. but also Seasons change, but people don't. just bc its still my longest fic to date

that was fun! no pressure tags!! and sorry if you've already been tagged don't be mad a meeee!!!

@pearynice @numinosmoon @2btheanswertothequestion @flowercrowngods @aringofsalt @scarcrossdlvrs

[biveganpoetbat]

15 people, 15 questions

Tagged by @dummerjan

1)Are you named after anyone?

Nope

2)When was the last time you cried?

A couple days ago in my car when things had built up and I just got a wall (not an actual wall, I was parked)

3)Do you have kids?

Yes, 2. I had not originally planned to have any.

4)What sports do you play/have you played?

Not really any, I like working out, mostly weights but I work at a pilates studio so I like doing that too when I can fit it around my work schedule (bc it’s free but also feels good to do). I was never a team sport person.

5)Do you use sarcasm?

Yes, often

6)What’s the first thing you notice about people?

I’m not sure. I mostly meet new people at work, and then I’m not being myself and just masking and concentrating on doing a good job. Probably a general vibe (if they seem friendly or intimidating), and physically I’m not sure there’s one thing, different people have different aspects that stand out or get my attention.

7)What’s your eye colour?

Blue

8)Scary movies or happy endings?

Scary movies, I love horror. Depending on the movie I enjoy happy endings, creepy endings, ambiguous endings, sad endings, as long as it makes sense for the movie.

9)Any talents?

I can touch my nose with my tongue. Not sure that counts, but the only thing I could think of.

10)Where were you born?

Canada, but in a different province than where I grew up and live

11)What are your hobbies?

Reding, video games (easy games bc my aim sucks), horror movies, any sort of movie really. I like to crochet, but my wrists have been bugging me so I haven’t done it for a while, I want to get back in, just have to learn to pace myself.

12)Do you have any pets?

A big fluffy orange cat named Dorito

13)How tall are you?

1.62m/5 foot 4

14)What was your favourite subject in school?

English

15)What is your dream job?

As a child, veterinarian, FBI agent, psychiatrist, but honestly idk. Something where I can be left mostly alone, working on spreadsheets or accounting stuff, I’ve been looking for something like that but no luck so far.

I can’t tag 15 people, too stressful. Anyone tagged feel free to ignore if you don’t like ask tags

@kindnessglow @dragon-teapot @moonbeam-fox @dio-best-waifu

[saltofmercury]

currently stalked your blog because i love everything you write and i found the post of you talking about how you met your husband. plss i need a 5 page essay on how and where yall went on a first date how he asked to get married how did you know he was the one!! please i love reading about people falling in love and getting married!! if you dont mind spilling the deets ofc 🤭

LOL I can promise you it’s one of the most BORING stories ever.

our first date we went to get vegan ice cream (bc I was a vegan like ok) when I met him. We went to this place near the school we met at and I remember calling him and hiding behind a car being like “sorry I’m not going to make it” JUST TO SEE how he would react and he looked so SAD answering the phone and I jumped out I’m like “I’m just kidding!” Like blame my sag moon for being a clown with all men.

I guess I knew he was the one when I felt so comfortable with him. I could really be myself with him and he never judged me for it. Not even when I told him weird things, or flossing in front of him, or when I passed gas in front of him. One of our first dates I told him I had a migraine and he pulled over and just had the car running letting me sleep for 2 hours so that it would go away. I thought that was something because a lot of men I dated were so mean about it. We had been dating about 6 months when covid hit and I remember that we just moved in together and he really took care of me/got to know who I was. (I was prone to anxiety attacks/depression and they had me on watch and he really invested time taking care of me while working full-time) he had created a routine/schedule for me to follow, working out, playing games, picking up hobbies, etc just so that I would be distracted. I think I knew he was “the one” when I remember he told me “I had a dream we had a daughter and we named her Gracie” and I shit you not Gracie was a girl name I wrote down in my notes app. Lmfaooo this is lame! Anyway that’s the story.

[zhalar]

i was trying to reply to the post of yours i just liked and almost blazed it instead why are the buttons so close to each other.............. aNYWAY i only saw it now, and it feels A Bit weird two weeks later to be like Oh Hey. but. i've never been able to shut up in my life so! Oh Hey. i had to move to your ask box bcs the reply thing's word limit was like shut the fuck up!!! but. so. i don't even have anything useful to say except i'm 24 and started studying for my degree when i was like 19 and i still Don't Fucking Have It and in between i've moved like four times and am almost broke and saurrrr unemployed and Local Employers Hate Area Woman-Ish bcs of my very unsexy mental illness and lack of work experience. and i also fucking hate dishes and cleaning and groceries and everything IS stupid! we could all be eating berries and raising chickens and doing weird art in the woods! and maybe we should! all that to say that your vent was Extremely Relatable. modern society is a harsh maze. and shit's scary!! but i see you. and i'm rooting for you, for what it's worth 🐻🌻🍀🍄💕 and i hope the rest of your summer is good and joyful and everything goes smoothly with school and everything!! <3 good vibes and cheers ✨

YOURE SO SWEET TO REACH OUT TO MY SANGSTY (sad/angsty) VENT-POST OOOHHH places a fresh and washed stone fruit or suchlike of your choice onto your palm as a form of thanks....... im sorry to have left you hanging with my answering this btw, it was my last work day for the summer today and i didnt dare to open the message last night in case i got so distracted that the lateness woulda got me lol. love to plan my every move within the bounds of a work-life schedule. btw fully dying-laughing about the possibility of you somehow accidentally blazing that post CAN YOU IMAGINE DSHFKJGH

im real sorry that the general sentiment of that post resonated, sucks how we're ALL constantly in the trenches, here :-( (and also a bit sheepishly sorry if my vent caused any alarm or whatnot... sometimes it alll just gets to be oh so much and one must air their grievances out to the world unprompted like that. grhyeah..) truly would Shrimply Love To Own Chickens and Thatse It. my viiru&pesonen -fantasy lifted its head once again this summer, i meannnn now thaaaaats what i'd call living!! ffs!!!!

i would never ask you to shut up the reply-feature does Not reflect my views and opinions in case you were wondering. for real this msg brightened this day considerably, youre both a complete sweetheart and so fucking funny for the formatting and tone of this ask, good lord. hopefully you'll have some easier times going forward, typically i wouldnt wish a job onto my worst enemy but i also recognize how that is something thats uhhh, quite valuable actually, indeed, so in that sense im beaming some fking sense into your local employers' brains. [HIRE THEM!!!!!!!! for some NICE TASK!!!!!] I HOPE YOUR SUMMER THUSFAR HAS BEEN COOL AND FUN!!! and that the rest of it/the upcoming august treat you well also <3

[terrainofheartfelt]

i’m reading your lovely jenate fanfic rn and one of the details i’ve really been enjoying is the way you characterize the sibling relationship between jenny and dan! and it has me wondering, more generally, how do you picture dan and jenny’s relationship playing out as adults? we don’t really get to see jenny post going to london on the actual show, and i’m curious how things might have changed or evolved between them with them both being on more equal relational footing, so to speak. (i also think i remember you mentioning here that you yourself have siblings, so as an only child i can imagine you probably have a much more nuanced picture of this than i do lol)

ohhhh thank you so much!!! this is something that I actually explore in the next chapter (posting forthcoming), but I'll talk about it now just to get ahead of that lol

I am thinking, in show canon -- and in the canon i construct in this au in which the show ends after Despicable B ;) -- that Jenny sort of...gives herself a clean break from all things New York, including Dan. and Dan, with all his abandonment issues, takes that harder than she probably sees at the time, but completely removing herself is what she needs the most in that moment. and then, a couple years later, they gravitate closer, but virtually.

with their work being so time-consuming and not really on the typical layman's schedule (like, writer and fashion designer lol what free time) they don't really have time to full on talk on the phone or facetime, but they text regularly, often over an inside joke or a link or a meme they need the other to see (because their partner wouldn't find it as funny)

I think Jenny as a grown up would find it easier to talk to Dan first about things over their parents, and vice versa, because their is this sibling kind of thing were no other person quite understands you the same way, and has known you this long and loved you this long. but the love is different from the love you feel with your parents. i'm not sure if this is entirely accurate...but the love feels...more unconditional somehow, because a sibling has more choice in loving you, but less failures of doing so.

and yes! I do have an older brother, our age difference (3 years) is slightly larger than Dan & Jenny's, but my relationship and experience with him informs - consciously and unconsciously - a LOT of how I write Jenny & Dan. Disclaimer: our pasts are not nearly as traumatic as these fake people, and our parents are still together (over 30 years WOOT WOOT), so our life experiences don't exactly line up

but that being said, I look up to my brother so much. and I switched school mid highschool (like jenny but for less fraught reasons) so I went from being "Andrew's Little Sister" everywhere I went to being just Liz, just myself. and that's an adjustment, from always being the little sister to growing into your own person, and I wouldn't have gotten that opportunity without moving schools, and Jenny probably wouldn't have without moving to London.

and my brother and I have followed our own paths and live in different timezones (and regularly different countries, he splits his time between the US and Canada it's a whole thing), but I never don't feel like he isn't there for me. I know with him I always have a place to crash and someone to send me cute pet pictures when I'm sad and someone who is just as worried about my dad's health as I am (again, whole other thing, not gonna get into it bc privacy but yeah). and I am never entirely lonely as long as he is existing someplace in this world. shit I'm gettting emotional just talking about it but,

he's the guy that drove me to my piano lessons and teased me for my music taste and took me to my first punk show and said "that was so good!" after every performance even though he knows nothing about opera. and when I had a 3 month contract in florida and couldn't take my cat with me he fostered Steph and now Andrew is Steve's favorite person and when I was unemployed I crashed in his apt while he was organized for the 2020 Iowa caucus and he crashed on my couch to visit me after I got my job and moved and we smoke weed and recite monty python and joke and laugh together and I can be a version of myself with my big brother in a way that I can't be with anyone else.

so to bring it back to your meta question, lmao, I imagine and attempt to write Jenny's relationship with her big brother in the same way. it's never the same as when they lived in the same house, and that's hard. (because they stopped living in the same house when he was 18 and she 16 and you can never really go back to that), and they each have their own lives and careers and loves that keep them where they are, but they are still always just...their for each other. and, if given the choice, they are the first person to hear the other's good news.

[tsunflowers]

I have watched so many video essays about mmo startups gone wrong, usually where there was crowdfunding involved, and not necessarily ending in a scam, but extremely incompetent management of time, money, and lack of experience of the team creating the game. Usually they push out something very lacking in anything to do + most promised features or basic things you would assume the game to have, never ending server errors etc and then they close within the first year

I know crowdfunding was not involved with the pripars game but this really has the same vibe. Synsophia is not as involved and it is in the hands of another company who has tanked previous projects. I’m glad you got in, but most people still can’t, the server errors are insane and if it is this bad after release, I cannot iamgine how bad those years of the private beta were!

I did always want to play it and still do, and will still try to keep up, but even before it came out I was questioning who would play this. I was surprised they thought pripara was worthy of an app, like super super excited but in this day? the age demo is so young but the gacha rates matching with games for older audiences is confusing. The amount of adults that play this because they already like Pripara is small enough, espescially to execs that just want money from gachas, the amount of adults that find this game and get into it randomly is even smaller. not enough kids can spend that much on this. 

I feel like there is no heart in this either. Barely any new content and everything is mostly converted to work on a smartphone, but already existed before it, I don’t mind that there is most likely very little love put into this but it’s still a little sad.

My guess is they barely make back what they put into this and close in the next 1-2 years but I’ll enjoy it while it lasts

-

this is basically the same impression that I have :( if it was a well-made game with real money spent on it then it would have launched on time and wouldn’t be locking people out almost a week after the supposed launch date

if the idol land anime had happened on schedule and been airing regularly in time for the app to tie in with it I feel like they would have more success and more eyes on the app too. it’s a weird situation bc they can’t (and probably shouldn’t) go all in on it being for adult audiences bc it’s pripara. but at the same time I think idol land is for a slightly older demographic than the first series, even if it’s just kids who watched the first series and grew up a little. like amari’s in high school. but I dont know how you would lean in to high school setting/audience when you’re making a pripara app and you only have like three high school age characters to work with