#i fucking remember this post in my bones dude

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

I am exhausted, good heavens.

[ceramicbeetle]

it's actually so fascinating to me that Brennan has created a character that maintains a pretty relaxed and mild-mannered demeanor and has said multiple times that the absolute Core of her is "FEAR" and how often we see this Fear manifest specifically in Avoidance; it really nails a relationship to that mentality where your brain fully Stops recognizing the emotion properly out of like, sheer self-defense from the stress of having to carry it all the time

I think this is also perfectly showcased in the way we tend to see Tula swing so suddenly from 'level and steady' to 'snarling Panic' and then back again - Just because your brain has detached itself from the Conscious Recognition of the emotion doesn't mean it can Actually stop itself from experiencing it. So the Fear is always there and always acting as a stressor, but because of that inability to Identify it there's no way to recognize or address it before that final straw hits and your bodymind jumps Straight into Full Meltdown Mode; but then once again, once you drop even a Little bit below that Peak Terror your brain ceases to process the emotion; it's like the most exhausting form of Poor Object Permanence in the world

And even if Tula is aware of this happening to her, that doesn't really make it any easier to deal with / address. Even if you're able to spot the symptoms Around the emotion -- chest pain, irritation, nausea, whatever -- because the Emotion Itself is basically impossible to find, you can't really Successfully Pin Down what the problem is OR a way to cope with it. If you can't figure out That You Are Anxious, then figuring out What Is Making You Anxious is impossible, which makes Find A Way To Make Peace With That incomprehensible. That's where the Avoidance comes in: you can no longer identify what might be a Dangerous Situation, which means that Anything New has a big potential to be Really Bad in a variety of ways (ranging "I don't Feel Good" to "Fully Lashing Out bc you've entered Fight/Flight and can't get out of it" to "Actual Outside Danger This Time") and that means the Only Way you know how to be Safe is to just Avoid Doing Anything New and Only stick to Familiar Situations, because anything unfamiliar is a monster of a gamble you don't know how to prepare for or cope with

[arolesbianism]

I've been doing a casual second lob corp playthrough for fun and one thing that I've really come to adore is how the different success rates can paint a pretty cool image of how work with it looks like at different levels of each work type and while I think it's kind of sad that base game you can't see the work percentages I also think it in a way adds a fun game of is this marginally harder at level five than four or is my guy just being bad at their job

[ddejavvu]

Hii hope you’re doing well, I was wondering if I could request a criminal minds blurb where reader is Penelope’s best friend and they’ve met for lunch in a cafe near Quantico, and reader is telling Penny about this new guy she hooked up with a few nights ago, reader tells Penny how big the guy was and then a few minutes later Spencer walks in and reader is like “P omg that’s the guy!!” And gestures towards Spencer who’s the only person ordering at the counter? I just feel like Penny would be equal parts both shocked and horrified that her sweet innocent boy Spence has a sex life but also that he’s HUNG?? I literally love you and all your Spencer works and I feel like you’d write this perfectly 🫶🫶

this post is 18+, minors dni.

Penelope is absolutely enraptured by the play-by-play you're murmuring to her over the low din of the cafe's patronage. The whirring and grinding of the machines behind the counter only further aid in your attempt to keep your conversation private, and you can smell sweet strawberries on the bubbly blonde when you lean in to give her details.

"And he reached for his fly- ooh, Penny, the way his arms looked," You gush, remembering the thick veins that had corded his bone while he'd wrestled with his belt, "He whipped his belt out of the way, and- stop!" You urge her when she wriggles her brows at you, "He took his pants off, Penny, and I swear to god I've seen thighs thinner than that dick."

Her resulting squeal is much less hushed than you'd managed to keep the rest of your conversation, and you swat at the arm that's not holding her coffee. She gets the message but resorts to stamping her feet beneath the table instead, a repeated clicking that blends in much better with the mechanical whirring of the baristas' handiwork.

"He was so thick, and Jesus- Penny, he was long, too, just big all around," You recall, insides throbbing with a phantom ache at the memory of what you'd taken last night, "I swear he had me seeing stars," You sigh, glancing down at the pale pink ring of lip gloss around the mouth of your cup, "I'd beg him to come over again tonight, but I think I need a week to recover."

"A week," She breathes dreamily, "I could barely feel the last guy I had."

"Oh, I could feel him," You laugh, "It's like I still can, I'm pretty sure he bruised- oh fuck!"

"What?" Penelope's brow dips instantly, concern etched into her pretty features, "What's wrong?"

"It's him," You grip her hand, nails digging into her skin, "It's the guy from last night!"

"Big dick dude?" She asks, and your frantic nod confirms her theory.

She tries to be subtle, bless her, when she turns to see him, but when the only person that she sees standing in line for a drink is her coworker, her brain chugs along slower than normal.

Where's big dick dude?

Oh, Spencer's here!

I don't see big dick dude.

Spencer is-

You're not sure even the most talented actor could ever recreate the sheer horror swimming in her gaze when she turns to face you again. Her eyes are blown wide and her mouth, lined in a pretty fuchsia paste, is downturned in a grimace.

"Please tell me you're not talking about the skinny mess in the sweater vest."

"That's exactly who I'm talking about!" You gush, trying to avoid his gaze lest he thinks you're trying to follow him around, "Penny, isn't he dreamy?"

"That's- oh my god," She recalls your descriptions, thicker than thighs, longer than you've ever seen, "I have to resign."

[namikawa]

— [the perfect host]

featuring: s. geto, s. gojo

cw: smut, implied threesome, cunnulingus, implied m/m, phone sex (?), daddy kink (ofc), established relationship (reader & gojo), fingering, fem reader, chubby reader, getting “caught” masturbating, use of the word cunt (sorry lol), aftercare, not proofread fr, anything else i forgot lolz, pet names (mama, baby, pretty, sweetheart, love). wc: n/a.

notes: this is actually a fic my friend wrote (never published) & i re did it with two diff characters & finished it for her cause she never did… so if yall like it GO TO HER BLOG ILL TAG HER. this wasn’t my og idea i just wrote the smut and tweaked & added. but enjoy pls, sorry i haven’t posted in so long life has beat me up. @nvmjccnluv !!!

“so explain to me why i’m watching her again, she seems completely capable of staying in your apartment alone yknow.” suguru questions over the phone. it’s not that he hates you, but what if he was busy? he wasn’t, but gojo didn’t need to know that, he didn’t even ask to be fair. quickly dropping you off after handing the long haired man a small bag of your things.

on the other end of the phone gojo lets out a huff of laughter. “had a few things to finish up, she gets too lonely when i leave her at home so i didn’t want her getting into things. you know how it is.”

“i actually don’t, but okay man.”

“anyway, she doesn’t like many people but she didn’t seem to mind you the last time we hung out, you seemed like a safe option.” gojo continues, sounding a bit strained.

“okay, whatever, fine.”

“where’s she at anyways? if she was with you she would’ve jumped your bones to get to the phone.”

walking toward the the closed door in the hallway, geto chuckles before reassuring his friend. “relax dude, she’s in the room taking a na- holy shit.”

-

“what happened??”

the dark haired man places his ear on the door to make sure he’s not hallucinating, not saying that he’s hoping to be.

muffled moans greet his ears, but not muffled enough evidently. no, you wanted him to hear. he would have to pass by your room anyways, given that you two would be sharing a wall for the night. but him being on the phone with your boyfriend was just a coincidence, an extremely embarrassing one.

he listens to your soft whines and high pitched whimpers for what feels like days, though its hasn’t even been half a minute, paying no mind to the man yelling at him on the phone.

“SUGURU? ANSWER ME! IS SHE OKAY? I SWEAR IF SOMETHING HAPPE-” at this point geto tries to think as hard as possible to come up with a lie that won’t get him killed by his friend.

snapping out of his daze, he finally gets enough courage to respond, “yeah um i’m pretty sure, maybe i’m wrong, i think she’s uh masturbating.”

“oh, oh okay” suguru can basically hear a smirk he knows all to well forming on gojos mouth. “don’t be a rude host, go help her out man.”

what the fuck is he talking about help you out? he can’t be understanding that this is his girlfriend he’s talking about, right? on top of that, shouldn’t he be asking you for consent as well.

“are you insane man? i know you’re into all that weird shit, but her? she’d probably kill me before i even got close to the bed and throw my dead body out of my own apartment.” as nice as it sounds he didn’t know if you’d be okay with any of this. he wasn’t going to just walk straight in, right?

there’s a loud howl that comes directly from the other end of the phone. “are you really being this much of a pussy right now? i’m giving you full permission to go help my girl out, and you wanna whine about how she might kill y-”

“shut the hell up man, i didn’t say anything about being a pussy.”

“alright, then there shouldn’t be an issue with you helping her out. don’t sit up on your high horse and act like you haven’t thought about it before, i know just how those perverted thoughts of yours work, don’t you rememb-”

“okay okay shut up satoru, im going.”

pushing open the door, the first thing geto notices is your hand rubbing lightly between your soft thighs and how your wetness soaks the bed, clear evidence of how needy you were. how long have you been at it?

gojo can hear you so clearly over the phone, he might as well be in the room with you, “shit, is that her pussy i’m hearing? whats it look like?” he questions, but unfortunately for him he receives no answer.

suguru is too busy enjoying the view and listening to the pathetic little sounds coming from your cunt. his sweatpants are slowly starting to fit a little tighter than before, but he doesn’t make any movements yet, just in case you don’t wanna play this little game.

almost immediately your soft eyes flutter open and lock into his, and he swears he just came in his pants.

“sugi, please, it hurts so much,” you whine out to him, desperate for his veiny hands on you. your own hand never seems to falter though, only moving in more erratic circles around your sensitive clit; while your other hand is busy touching your nipples, trying to get the most stimulation possible.

knowing that you were just as needy for him as he was for you made the man’s confidence peak. he gives you a light smile as he walks closer to the bed, softly sitting down next to you. he leans over you a bit, close enough to where you can smell the minty, almost overpowering, scent of his shampoo. half his hair loosely tied up in a bun, the other half falling past his shoulders as he looks down at you.

“something wrong, pretty? those fingers not doing enough for you, right? don’t ‘cha wanna wait for your boyfriend to come back so he can help you out, he’s on the phone you know.”

his soft hands begin to work at your thighs, but it seems like it’ll never be any more than that. continuing for a little longer, he presses the speaker button on his phone, handing it over to you as you pull away from your core.

“can you hear me, sweetheart?” gojo asks, now finally getting some time to speak to you after being ignored for so long. “i gave sugi permission to help you out, okay? does that sound alright to you?” he utilizes the small nickname you’d given his friend, innocently coercing you to be good.

you give a small “mmm” in agreement. then, opening your legs, you grab at suguru’s hand and place it between your thighs, just barely touching your cunt.

gojo continues, smiling to himself on the other side of the device. “‘kay. i’m gonna talk you through it, just so i know you’re treating my girl right. take two of your fingers and stuff it inside of her, she’ll clench up at first but just keep working at it and she’ll open up, okay? maybe if you do good, you can have something too.”

geto lets out an annoyed breath, short, but just long enough for gojo to catch it. he knows what that means. what’s even stopping him from fucking you in first place? it’s not like gojo would know. but as he looks into your pleading eyes he realizes he’d do anything to make sure you’re content and happy.. even if that means listening to satoru’s perverted requests.

his fingers slide down to rub at your clit just a bit, before burying his pointer and ring finger deep into your cunt, you clench so tight around him, it makes him feel like he’s dreaming the way your teeth suck at your bottom lip attempting to hide your whines.

“cmon pretty, open up for me. promise i’ll make you feel good, okay?”

a throaty whimper slides from between your lips as geto’s fingers work you open. “‘s good sugi, please like that more.” you scoot down a little more, chasing his fingers to get even just a little more stimulation.

“next you’re gonna press on her clit, just a little though she’s a sensitive little thing.” gojo groans out, it’s obvious he’s taken a break from his work to focus on… other things.

“yeah yeah, i know how to use my fingers, asshole.” suguru voices, clearly annoyed. although, he still abides by the instructions and moves his thumb to press on your clit just a tiny bit. your back arches away from his fingers almost immediately, like a natural instinct, he grabs your plush hips with his other hand, pulling you back down. “nuh uh, c’mere sweet girl, you wanted my help you’re gonna get it.”

his delicate fingers curve upward into you and you feel as if you’re floating on cloud nine, the way he flicks them at just the right speed while managing to hold you down and deepen his movements. it’s all too much for him you.

the sound of gojo’s voice breaks geto out of his daze, “fuck, i gotta go suguru. i know you’ll take care of her. i’m gonna have to cut this shit short, i’ll try to come back later tonight instead of tomorrow morning. love you guys, love you baby, be good for sugi okay?” geto’s eyes immediately flicker to yours, and you see just a little bit of what you think could be fear, or excitement, in his eyes.

“bye daddy, love you too.” you whine out, hearing a quick click before the call ends.

“daddy?” he questions. “knew he was into some shit, didn’t know you were too, sweet girl. you’re too pretty and innocent, or at least you put up a good act.” his fingers slide out of you as he snickers, not ignoring the way you pout at the loss of stimuli.

“nah, not gonna leave you here all needy don’t worry mama, just gonna do it my way, that sound good to you?” geto grabs you by your hips as you choke out a small “yea”, pushing you closer to the headboard of the bed. he fully removes his hair tie and throws all of it up into a bun, swiftly grabbing your underwear and pulling it off.

you look down at him as he crawls closer to you on his stomach, wrapping his arms around your thighs and closing them around his head. you feel his fingers spread your cunt apart, licking a long stripe onto you. your body tenses up, and on instinct your hand finds its way into suguru’s hair, tugging lightly. his head perks up at you, smiling, but eventually just deciding to leave you be.

his tongue swipes over your clit, taking small breaths occasionally as he tastes your cunt. neither one of you know who this is really for at this point. he’s supposed to be ‘helping you’ but with the tent growing in his sweats he might as well be doing this for his own pleasure instead. you continue to take harsh pulls at his dark strands, so unfamiliar to you. mostly with satoru you opted for scratching at his shoulders or gripping at the sheets due to the length he kept his hair, but this, this was something you could get used to.

“sugi please, m so close, want it so bad, need you to make me cum.” you cry out, loving the way his nose rubs against your clit as he licks.

he doesn’t say anything, he can’t really, but you know he understands. he grips your thighs tighter, licking the same way as before, occasionally sucking at your clit, and before you know it you’re squirming all over his face as that familiar feeling rushes over you.

the only thing that suguru could make out of your cries were “thank you”, “so good”, and “daddy”? he wasn’t sure if you were calling him daddy or if you wanted gojo, but at this point it didn’t really matter to him. he pleased you and that’s all he needed to make him feel better.

as he lifted his head up from your pussy he could already tell how tired you were getting, he immediately grabbed you a change of clothes that gojo had packed and cleaned you up with a wet washcloth. “everything okay, mama? need anything?” your eyes strain open and you smile at the man standing above you, “i’m okay, thank you for your help. will you stay?” you could tell that he genuinely cared for you, and was worried he had done something wrong by the tone in his voice. him staying was more for him rather than yourself, not that you were complaining.

he pulled off his shirt as he crawled into bed next to you. grabbing his phone from the bedside table he saw that gojo had sent him a message.

“i’ll take care of you both when i’m back, cause i’m betting you didn’t take anything for yourself. see you both soon ;)”

suguru chuckled to himself at the message from his friend, looking down at you peacefully sleeping on his chest. maybe he could get used to something like this? but for now, he’s content.

[mondo-tastic]

At work rn waiting for shift to start so I don't have em to post but I did more close up shots of the driver of the roadblasters car-

no one ever seems to take into account what he was feeling and everything when shit went down. He doesn't even know who the fuck turbo is. He literally just got plugged in. He'd be shit scared of turbo too I reckon even if he didn't fuckin t bone him at full force. Like he only knows the graphics of his game and what people look like in his game so like. imagine seeing this thing coming at you

when you look like this

I know we don't actually SEE him in roadblasters but considering everything about wreck it ralph he is 100 percent in this car and isn't just a car driving itself

Now off into headcanon territory - and just some theorising-

so when I was drawing the scene of the roadblasters dude getting roadblasted I thought to myself:

even though you regenerate if you're in your own game, do you still feel pain when you die?

and I came to the conclusion: YES.

remember when calhoun was punching Felix? he was very clearly in pain from those injuries even though he could instantly heal them. and when ralph walks into the party, Felix screams and everyone gasps when the chunk of ceiling falls on him even though he regenerates straight after. that was more of a kneejerk reaction from shock than a oh fuck I'm gonna die scream, but I reckon it was also in anticipation of the pain too.

so can we talk about WHAT HAPPENED IN ROADBLASTERS.

like. we never see what happens after turbo crashes into him??? was he just locked into a permanent injury when the screen froze?? I mean Obviously turbo escaped so there would have been a moment where the game was turned off, probably unfreezing/resetting to let turbo get out of dodge

But also like HE BLOWS UP WHEN HE HIT'S SOMETHING. LIKE??? you'd be fucking hoping the kid playing isn't totally incompetent and you get painfully exploded every two seconds ????

wHAT ABOUT THE TURBO TWINS???? LIKE OBVIOUSLY THEY DIDN'T ESCAPE THEIR GAME BEING UNPLUGGED???? SO LIKE. WOULD HAVING ALL YOUR CODE ERASED BE PAINFUL??

Anyway. Work starts in four minutes so I'm throwing this out for the turbo freaks in my phone. Enjoy.

[ysabelmystic]

“I just came from r/196” ask game

Saw another post. I think I should invite y'all to one of our longstanding traditions. Answer the questions then tag 10 (or more) people. I'll go first.

Name? Frankie

Pronouns and gender? he/they/it, transmasc

Sexuality? Lesbian

Country? USA

Top 5 fandoms? Bungou Stray Dogs, Cosmere, All for the Game, Fundiesnark (not a series but I'm too deep in it to not consider it a fandom), .....the tornado fandom? (they're my special interest)

What is your Most forbidden snack? The preserved bones at the Atlanta Bodies Exhibition. They looked so crunchy...

Would you pet a bug? If it's big enough, it is pettable.

Share a weird fact/story about yourself with the class. I like to drive around rural areas and photograph old, sometimes abandoned locations in the dead of night. I have been literally chased out of towns by foot and by car on two separate occasions. The second time this happened, "See You Again" by Miley Cyrus came up on shuffle and that's the soundtrack my friend and I tore out of town to. Also every "guy" I've dated except for my most recent ex (who has big egg energy) is a lesbian now.

What does the color blue taste like? Creme brulee

What is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen? The appalachian mountains of Tennessee in the middle of summer. There's kudzu everywhere. On the backroads, there were several old, dilapidated Baptist churches barely hanging to the side of the mountain. I wonder how many of them were still in use.

What is the stupidest thing you've ever done? Short version: my friend's house almost got broken into by this dude who'd been stalking us for months while we were home alone. Instead of calling the cops, we decided to confront him with a bow and arrow (me), a hatchet, and a baseball bat (him). The plan was that if it went badly, we would simply throw his corpse into one of the many lakes in the neighborhood and let the alligators eat his remains (this was Florida). Why? Because we were afraid of having our home-alone privileges revoked. Luckily for us all, the guy fucked off and we never saw him again.

Stupidest thing you've seen/heard someone else do/say? My ex thought that Jackalopes were real. Also, a nurse I was doing rotations with apparently thought that "Witness Protection" was for Jehovah's Witnesses.

Hyperfixation song? Young Enough + Bleach by Charly Bliss

Is there any meaning behind your profile picture and/or username? Profile pic; I'm transmasc and I'm currently obsessed with TriStamp. Username; It was my fake internet name when I was like 13. I won't change it because I want my mutuals to recognize me, and because I do have a viral post associated with this name.

Dream career as a child? Doctor (funnily enough I'm now in nursing school)

Dream career as an adult? Professional Jester. Not a comedian. I just want to be some weird little guy who dresses silly and you can hire me to roast your boss at work parties.

Thoughts on cilantro? Delicious

Have you ever been banned from a location and if so, why? I honestly can't remember? Probably... but in recent memory I've mainly banned people from places.

What is your cursed food combination? Pineapple on a hotdog with grilled onions. It Slaps.

Trans rights? TRANS RIGHTS

Tagging: @rocket-mankoi @mostlymarco @atleast8courics @jazzlike39 @gemsweater72 @limbobilbo @ameliaaltare @redcrane112 @theoneofwhomisblue @twinkenjoyer @theultimatecarp and anyone else who wants to jump on

[lemon-natalia]

Nona the Ninth Reaction - John 8:1 🐄

the message now reads: ‘THE/TOWER/HA’ . i’m sticking with the assumption that ‘tower’ is a full word and ‘ha’ is the beginning of the next until proven otherwise

okay and now it’s talking about falling asleep within the dream, which is confusing as all hell. whoever this narrator is, ‘her body was a mystery to her’, which is very reminiscent of the themes throughout of Nona wondering who she is. i really do think that this narrator has to be Alecto somehow or on some level, maybe because of Harrow falling asleep in the Tomb at the end of HtN?

also hammocks made of ‘baby-soft skin’. Ew. 

and an interesting point of reference, John’s eyes are explicitly black w/ white rings on them, so this dream is set after Alecto becomes his cavalier. although it might mean nothing, it’s also very interesting considering just how significant eye colour has been that the torchlight makes the white ring ‘a satiny gold’, given his eyes were originally gold - i wonder if it might have something to do with the type of shared Lyctorhood he and Alecto have going on?

honestly if someone came on the internet showing off that they could control dead bodies or whatever, i would think it was a deepfake or some other trolling as well. i love that apparently there are still Flat Earthers around despite having the tech to have some kind of space station on Mars existing

its ironic people calling him the Antichrist initially, given that he eventually adopts the exact opposite vibe of being a deity. and the whole religious/God/Christ associations aren’t even something that he solely adopted post-Resurrection himself either, even here people, and John’s group of friends, are explicitly comparing him to Jesus and using Christianity as a basis of what to do

and uh yeah, realistically someone broadcasting that they can raise the dead and heal everyone would probably be considered a cultist not just by the government, but by most people honestly 

and we’ve got A— Junior, (presumably) Alfred, joining the team as well, who apparently went from being a hedge fund manager in one life to swordfighting in the next. wild. 

‘she’d adored being a cop’ i like Pyrrha well enough so far, but yikes 

even though John’s still getting to grips with his powers, and can’t do proper resurrections yet, he still seems a lot more powerful than other necromancers later, given he’s able to build an entire wall out of perpetual bone, something which from what I remember Harrow treated as a massive achievement at the end of GtN 

what the actual fuck did those cows and sheep do to you man!!! is this why Canaan House has all that horned skull imagery, as like a weird little tribute to how cow murder contributed to him becoming Emperor. maybe the real cow murder was the friends that we made along the way

‘they treated us like we’d done some kind of huge crime’ MY DUDE.

[gilverrwrites]

GOOD MORNING CENTRAL CITY

Axel Walker/Reader, 1K words Kinktober entry 15: Sex tape Warnings: Intox | public humiliation/exposure | hang over Requested by: Authors choice I love him, he's my emotional support disaster man and has been for over a decade and I need ya’ll to love him too so I can feel validated in posting insane shit about him.

A big smile, a shock of fair hair, and a funny-looking hand. “Micks gonna owe me big bucks when I tell him about this.” An unfamiliar voice cackles. That’s all you remember prior to blacking out.

Some say that the best indicator as to how good of a night out you had is how bad you feel the next day. If that’s true, you must have peaked yesterday, because this morning you feel like death warmed up. The only thing worse than your pounding head right now, is how the world seems determined to irritate it; your flatmate is up and making a racket in the kitchen, your curtains aren’t closed properly and so a stream of sunlight is blaring right across your favourite spot on the bed and your goddamn phone won’t stop pinging.

Determined to sleep off your hangover, you roll across the bed, away from the light. Clumsily you switch your phone onto silent, accidentally dropping it to the ground in the process before pulling your comforter over your head. Unfortunately, you’re only afforded a few minutes of peace before your phone begins to vibrate against the flooring. Blindly sticking your arm out, you feel around looking for it, swearing when you accidentally bat it further away. Damn, your coordination is off.

With all the effort you can muster, you pull yourself out of bed, dropping to your knees quickly, weak legs barely able to stand. How much had you had last night? You might still be drunk.

Eventually, you stumble over to the purveyor of unwanted noise, precariously holding it high above your head as you lay down, scrolling through many, many, many notifications. Jeez, were you dead or something?

Lots of links, lots of caps locks, lots of intensity that you don’t have the brainpower for. You’re about ready to turn the thing off when a new message comes through from your bestie, the latest in a series. You don’t bother reading the whole string, just clicking on the most recent link they'd sent you. It opens up to a garish-looking, and fucking verified Twitter account.

Trickster II ⭐️✔️ @.1stheworst Young, dumb, full of fun. Taken 💛

His bio is dated to yesterday which strikes you as odd, but ultimately, what do you care? It’s The Trickster, and not even the cool one. This loser was responsible for blowing up your favourite sandwich shop, amongst a slew of other highly inconvenient catastrophes.

But despite your distaste for the guy, your interest is piqued, so you keep scrolling.

@.1stheworst: comment if your babe is hotter than mine 😍 [link]

The image is behind a paywall, which, fair, get your bag dude, but the replies have been turned off and you’re not sure if it’s meant to be a dumb joke, but it makes you chuckle... and then groan as the laughter causes a searing pain to shoot through your brain. At the same time, your flatmate drops something. The jarring clang of metal on tile echoes through the apartment and makes your whole body throb.

@.1stheworst: GOOD MORNING CENTRAL CITY [image]

The next tweet has an actual image attached, a photo of him, face covered by a blanket as he rests his head on someone’s, presumably his 'babes', bare chest. There’s nothing particularly evocative about it but for the myriad of matching hickeys and bite marks on each of their bodies. You will say, however, that this mystery person has good taste in something. You have the same bedspread…

No.

The realisation dawns on you slowly.

There’s no fucking way.

You live in Keystone, it can’t be you.

You would never…

Disbelief holds firm until you run your fingers down your neck, hissing in pain when you brush against a tender bite mark that had not been there yesterday.

Shit.

Dread seeps in your heavy bones as you rack your brain, trying to recall a modicum of anything that happened last night, but you come up empty.

With an intentionally deep breath, you delve further into his feed and are greeted by a nightmare you hadn’t realised racked your psyche until now. It’s a video, posted at 3 AM this morning.

Starring: You.

In the clip; you’re on your knees. Eyes red and glassy. Swollen lips giggling around the head of a cock. The Trickster's cock.

“Shit, ya know, you’re the hottest person I’ve ever met. I'm so fucking lucky.” His tone is laced with laughter, high-pitched, almost hyena-like. Blue-painted nails brush your scalp, and your eyes roll back in response, drool escaping your open mouth as you moan aloud. “Oh fuck, that felt good.”

Clearly impatient, or perhaps just excitable, The Trickster starts to rut his hips, nudging his dick further into your mouth. The grunts and groans that escape him are frankly obscene, and he only grows louder when you stick your tongue out and begin to work his length deeper down your throat.

“Shit. Shitshitshit, you’re gonna take it all?! Neat trick, makin’ it disappear.” In spite of his elatedly shaking body, the camera stays stock still in his cybernetic arm, allowing you a clear-cut view as you take every inch of his pale pinkish cock down until your nose is buried in his blond bush. “Yeah, yeah like that.”

He doesn’t seem to shut up once, any lulls in his chattering, filled by lusty cries and pants that make you feel admittedly somewhat aroused.

“This is the best head I ever got.” He praises and your body flushes in real-time as you watch yourself bobbing along his shaft, barely gagging even when his head seemingly delves repeatedly and frantically into your the back of your throat. “Shit, you're fuckin' solid gold babe. You don't mind me postin' this do ya? My fans will bust a nut when they see you."

Your words are garbled around a mouthful of cock and saliva, but you nod, clear as day before the video cuts off abruptly. There are no more relevant posts except another link that supposedly leads to the full video. The host site looks shady as hell, but you immediately start entering your details until an incoming text grabs your attention. It’s from your housemate, reminding you to water their plants while they're out of town.

So, if they’re not home. That means… fucker.

Hi friend, I'm so glad you exist!

Kinktober Masterlist

[speedierthanasubmarine]

I decided to watch helluva boss and imma do 2 separate posts for seasons 1 and two (why did I write it like that…?)

Season one

God I love this show. The writing is way more my speed than Hazbin hotel on Amazon, I enjoyed the writing in the pilot, but once Amazon took over the humor just didn’t really land for me, and tbh the plot took over and I started focusing more on that, and in general I’m more partial to the rapid fire YouTube dry comedy and this sentence is a friggin mess- I found HB SO FREAKIN FUNNY

Dude when he goes “FUCK, a new hole” I lost it

“Just try and sue us”

“We’re rich and we’re hot”

“I can just buy all the things!”

“You should commit die”

“Hehe, Trumpet!”

These are just my kinda lines, I don’t know how to explain it, I was wheezing all throughout the season

The music OH LORD when I say I’ve listened to stolas’s lullabye, lulu land, cotton candy, and house of ozmodius like 100000 times I’m… exaggerating but like you get the point the music here is friggin fantastic I also really like how a lot of the music is diegetic, I think that’s a fun touch. I don’t remember whether this is the case in Hazbin, but in this one it was like… I don’t know, it made sense that they were singing when they were singing… am I articulating myself well? I don’t care, iykyk if not, no prob

The animation is great, Viv loves them spinny shots and I am here for it. The amount of genuinely amazing action scenes is super impressive, and even the chill scenes have a ton of personality

The voice acting might be what steals the show for me, idrk anyone’s names cept Alex Brightman but BLITZS VA NEEDS AN AWARD, also slight tangent but I don’t know what it is with stolas’s va but he sounds a lot like a bird in the same sense that Gary Oldman sounded a lot like a bird in Kung Fu Panda 2, what is it that casting directors recognize in actors that screams bird?! Because both of these men are just SO BIRD DOES ANYONE GET WHAT I MEAN moving on, Ozzie’s voice was also effing PERFECT it slid silkily over me like… silk butter or smtg it was the perfect lust voice, I loved it. Everyone else was also great, but they were extra great.

It was also just so fun? Like in hazbin there’s very little just… shenanigans to enjoy, nothing wrong with that because it’s not that type of show, whereas this season is jam packed with them. Like I’ve heard that everyone hated episode 4, but like I don’t know I loved it😆 I just found it to be good old fashioned chicanery, and I liked the chaos and stupidity of it, made for some entertaining TV. This story engine is just mad entertaining for me.

I also enjoyed the writing of most of the characters (Millie, Moxxie, Loona, and Octavia still leave a bit to be desired imo, but whatever, they can’t all be winners and there’s nothing wrong with them) Blitz kinda reminds me of a Barney Stinson type character, which I really enjoy, and I also really like how his boss persona kinda infects everything he does while simultaneously being what’s screwing him over, his nature is kinda like a snake swallowing its own tail, which is tragic and beautiful, and Stolas compliments him well by being, not an enabler, but… I don’t know a clever way to say this… Stolas is a wreck in the best way and he just works. He’s short sighted, like extremely so, like how he thinks sleeping with Blitz will fill his emotional void so he does it but it just drives them further apart so it’s like he’s in a hole and in order to get out he’s gonna dig to pile up dirt so he can climb out but he’s an idiot and that’s a stupid idea and I loved his whole arc. Very enjoyable stuff drama.

Kinda random but whoever Viv’s foli artist is also deserves an award, the sound effects in this show are pristine and it’s incredible (yes I’ve seen the scene where the gun sounds go off a few seconds too late, and yeah, mistakes happen, but every bone crunch sounds and other stuff like that being so enunciated in an indie show is extremely impressive)

Anyhoo, very fun, very emotional, nice to look at, very funny, yada yada- altogether great season 1.

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

These Nimona headcanons are a day late cause yesterday was my first day at the new job and I got carpal tunnel

Bal can’t stand the sounds of knuckles cracking or joints popping 

Which is funny because like I said in this post I know that man sounds like pop rocks when he stands up 

What’s funnier is both Nimona and Ambrosius crack their knuckles any chance they get 

Ambrosius tries to do it away from Bal but Nimona does it in his ear on purpose 

One time Bal punched someone and he freaked out not because he knocked the dude out cold 

But because his knuckles cracked when he did it and he claims it felt disgusting 

I feel like you can really tell a lot about someone when it comes to their phone and the same can be said for the trio 

Bal’s phone is weirdly high-tech even by their societies standards 

When he was recovering after the wall fell he had a lot of time on his hands and just started to mess with his phone 

He doesn’t have a lot of apps on it you can tell he doesn’t really touch it unless he needs it 

He does however have an app that plays audio books because he likes listening to them on long car rides 

Ambrosius phone is the most bare-bones phone you can possibly buy 

It doesn’t have any bells and whistles at most it can call text and maybe has a couple of games on it but that’s it 

He has little to no storage and he asked Bal for help 

Bal was shocked to find out that most of his storage was being used on photos 

And that's how he found out Ambrosius has a million photos of him and Nimona just sitting on his phone

Sometimes it’s the same photo from different angles  

He doesn’t know if he should be crying or terrified cause he doesn’t remember half of these being taken

Nimona’s phone like Ambrosius is very bare bones 

He only really uses it to call and text and sometimes listen to the music he illegally downloaded 

His phone has 15 viruses because of this and Bal has given up trying to save it 

The phone is also cracked to high heaven and no one is sure how it’s still functioning 

I’ve had this idea for a while but I feel like sometimes Nimona will make incredibly outdated references 

Sometimes it’s like 20 years and sometimes it’s 500 

And she’ll have to sit the person down and explain the entire reference to them

Which is hard because sometimes the reference is deeply involved with the history that’s been purposefully covered up

So then she’ll have to give a full-on history lesson 

And you’d think she would get annoyed by this but no

She actually gets really excited explaining the history that’s been lost and why that history has been covered up 

It’s one of her special interests that she can go on about forever 

What’s even funnier is when someone references something from a long time ago and they’ll just look at them and go “How the fuck do you know that”

I find the idea of Nimona not being able to handle spicy food but loving it at the same time hilarious 

Especially considering the fact that they’re living with two Asian men and Asians don’t play about spice (I swear to this day my Mama burned both her and my tastebuds off) 

They try really hard to look tough and eat all the food they’re given 

But snot is running down their face and there are tears in their eyes and they need to take constant breaks 

Poor baby coughs when you add sriracha to their food 

Whereas Bal and Ambrosius are out here guzzling hot sauce like it’s water 

Nimona prays on their downfall while also begging the boys to teach them their ways

[mysteriouspersonrambles]

Live listening to the new Malevolent episode so long post:

Dude fucking medieval Britain being Kayne’s bind spot is so funny - like what a loser

Alexander!!!! My Boy I love you so much

This peace is not going to last

Oh a weaved basket let me guess the village is going to be totally destroyed and that’s what causes the foul taste in the river or the bad river taste came from the witches nest dumping into the river supple

You walk a path with devils- bestie you guys run had fist into the devils on a regular basis don’t act like all those run-ins aren’t your fault

Nooo Yorick - get bagged idiot I suppose

Arthur continues to be the most conspicuous guy of all time. Congrats buddy nobody does it worse than you

Do you still have your lighter remember the magic lighter

Arthur you trespass on the Daily you where a fucking PI dude

Oh never mind Arthur got his spooky sense and being touched by ghosts apparently he truly is beloved

Arthur was a Boy Scout oh man I forgot about that. What a mental image

Oh yeah Arthur’s super dead parents

Oh man friendship let’s go. Wait Arthur what happened with your friend did die or something. Oh who am I kidding it’s malevolent of course he’s dead

Ohh what else is in the pen. Is it bones I hope it’s bones.

Aw boo it’s just a weird figure dudes you guys encounter those things all the time

Bewildered Englishman I love that

Yeah dude he’s different it’s the trauma. Remember he had to eat a man

But your Kayne’s favorite boytoy that should mean something

Dude I hope they run into their other self’s that would be so fucking funny please 🙏 or like a Catbox situation (does anybody get that reference)

Yeah dude fuck the narrative

You might fail but also like you’re the MC’s so plot armor

Huh difficult to see anything else but the fire- this better not be foreshadowing

The Guy is back hell yeah ohhh what a voice

Arthur does not know how the deal with the fay

Arthur this village is fucking dead there is nobody here

Yeah guys this guy has been through some shit

I think he’s warning you dude you know there are monsters about

Yeah dude the Fay the one you don’t know how to handle

I like this guy he speaks in riddles

I this guy talking about the prince or another Arthur or just regular Arthur

Welcoming is a dangerous thing Arthur

Dude not his biggest trauma

This man is not up to date with modern law procedures man

Ohhh spooky ghost man is a story teller

Dude the foul taste in the water

Self hate for the win 🏆

He is the boy’s vengeance

Oh shit was I right or half right but I knew this guy was ghost guy. I think that’s actually so cool

The witches child?? Or Faroe

Arthur these noises are not the ones I would want to hear when talking about children. Like I know you’re morning but the noises man

Good choice Arthur I would want the truth too but it could be something you know but still

That’s so cool that the ghost kids are so powerful good for you ghost kids

Scratch!!!! Or the goat lady the one who was mentioned in the 1st season I can’t spell her name but I was talking about her the other day

Or maybe just another spooky ghost lady either way in hyped

Fuck indeed you just murder one of her kids and she got a good look at you and who you’re traveling with

You can’t destroy the darkness idiot

Oh fuck is Alexander evil please I will cry if he is

You don’t get a weapon you chose a truth

Yeah man you can’t escape the darkness idiot

Is she why Kayne can’t be here. Is Kayne scared of her please that would be so funny

“He is not what he seems” I can’t tell if this is about Yorick or Alexander the owl it could be both but I love them so much.

Also where was Yorick this episode I missed him he’s not evil just kinda dumb and a plotter and he wants a hand of glory but he’s just a little guy

Arthur are you going to sleep on the ground the forest is going to eat you

William aw what happened to him how did he die horribly

I’m sad this episode was a feeler though I’m glad Arthur got a little peace of mind when it came to Faroe. I can’t wait to see the absolute shit show that must be next episode this one was much too fluffy something terrible must be coming.

[rainbowgod666]

IMPORTANT: This blog's *official* purpose is so you can talk to your blorbos. If its a Media thats Famous, 97% of the time you can ask them whats life inside of a world borne of my imagination. Also, you can send me images of creatures that dont exist and MAYBE i can Taxonomize them. Idfk

Colors sendable (the first image is from @sizzlingcandyjellyfishhh while thesecond image is from @gaybichon), and also the @wynmu vibes thing. While the divider was made by @sister-lucifer (weird url ik but mines weirder soooo)

To all RPers: my very existence takes the narrative and uses it as toilet paper. The 4th wall is my onahole and so help me you will Behave.

To let you get started, here are some of my best posts. Remember that the Ourple ones are KINDA mandatory if you want ANY background on wtf is this blog.

List of my powers / Its the end of the world as you know it (and i did it on purpose) / an admin kicked me off the island lmao / Mental Health Time / That one time i traumadumped to mewo omori about my usual shit / PM Seymour has removed me from his internet. / You Absolute Buffoons / The Numeron Game / Well thats a thing that happened! / Out of touch: leap yeap / 🅱️usiness / Magnus did nothing wrong, except its steven universe / welcome to the internet, SCP edition / #HALLOLLAH# / AMERICA IS FASCIST HEAVEN BECAUSE FUNNY / Lost Childhoods / please save those poor gay americans / Free Disco Elysco / Bone to the bad / Priting Wrojects / the True Range of my abilities / the fuck's an apocalypse knight anyway? / @punkitt-is-here fucked Geronimo Stilton and i think its a good thing / Alex goes batshit insane and forces everyone to do as he says... again 🙄 / Screaming in a Pattern. / wizardposting: because powerscaling needed fuckign Zeno Dragonballsuper apparently / BEN 10 BUT LANCER? FUCK YEAH! / So i went batshit insane again / High Geology / fantasy settings on tumblr are really fucking cool actually / RIFLE. IS. FINE. BUT YOU FUCK UP DESIGN YOU UROD. / i technically claimed ownership of Dr. Bright and Betty from glitchtale do you seriously think im NOT gonna do that for homestuck? / XenasOuch / SCP-8000 contest, OR: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUC- / LEMMINO but like, 8 years ago / Hazbin Hotel: a necessary... something i guess. / the original joke was my brain yapping about predators sooo...

Below is who i am, and also the tags you can (and should) search for

Hi, name's Alex.

Born on the first ever day of 2005 and also having aspergers, i am a guy from italy trying to make it impossible for anyone to spend a day without knowing who i am. Also i literally trascend powerscaling so hard the only things that can even put a DENT on me are... decided by me. Welcome to the multiverse i guess.

DNI: people who support genocide, people who tolerate corporate bullshit, racists, and terfs.

The following list is ALL THE TAGS USED TO NAVIGATE THIS BLOG. Seriously. This masterpost is an explaiantion for the "portal hub" i placed in the search bar

Lore Post: sometimes the lore of the multiverse, sometimes my personal life.

Welcome to the multiverse: sometimes MASSIVE textpost telling everyone "oh yeah right, this dude has autism", usually me existing. tHE MAIN TAG.

Alex's Answering Machine: literally my asks

The magical workshop: turns out the wizards of tumblr are the reason the phrase "some of y'all have gotten too comfortable saying stuff without getting punched for it" exist. And its up to my autistic, protagonism-fueled low self-esteem high self-awareness ass to... fix shit up.

Belowstory: undertale but REALLY FUCKED UP: so basically frisk falls down and is greeted by a feminine voice that calls itself chara (it becomes slightly visible after getting out of the ruins) and like the good boi undertale character he is he proceeds to save the world. This entire thing exists because one time I was like "how fucked up OP can a sans be before its My Immortal levels of wtf?" And uh yeah here we are uuuuuuh sans greets you by pointing a .44 magnum at you so thank the head of the guards (papyrus) for saving you. Everyone here is broken and just wants A Fucking Break. Also you gain levels in pacifist because LOVE is Level Of VirtuE. Fuck you lmao

Undertale.exe: so I looked at Camilla Cuevas being an awful person. Then i looked at the beautiful anime that is @jakei95's underverse... then i smushed it all toghether to basically create the perfect AU. Frisk is a pansexual fuccboi that Has Game, Chara is THICC and has the best knife ever, Betty is a 1000 year old living superweapon thats also a hot girl, and Asriel is a Streemur. All of them live in this house far away from the city thats literally a larger version of sans' house. All charachters can legally drink (prepare for Drunk Chara shenanigans where its Betty Glitchtale the drunk one instead) and the only one who (probably) isnt gay is Asriel (even though frisk covets the Dreemur Dong) (one day soldier, one day...). Many chatachters from many AUs sometimes come to visit cause, you know. Its a nice place.

Curseworld: massive writing project of mine which is just "adventure time shaped mass of autism". The world is cursed and fucked over, and everything is colorful. Its also part Owl House because fuck you the magic system is FUCKED here.

Internet friends: basically internet stereotype-shaped people. We have a furry thats normal, a reddit/discord mod that just wants to work in peace, and the protagonist is Just A Guy but a-ha! He has both an xbox an...d ps5 thus fucking over any CAD reference. The last sketch i made was a mr.monopoly shaped guy who really wants youngsters to actually AFFORD shit who is married to a very obvious reference to Meru the succubus. Also i 100% intend to put a gag about mr beast living in an ATM when he isnt making videos

Im looking respectfully: look. Back then tumblr was basically Rule 34 with twitter users. Now its way better at the cost of a fraction of their value. Have fun looking at attactive women!

TOH:NEXT GENERATION: not even @moringmark's comics are safe! Enjoy the adventures of ayzee commented by me... telling everyone that shes STRONG strong. Like holy shit girl inherited will much?

Warhammer 50k: listen. This is just me looking at games workshop and fucking emperors tts and going "fuck that. Heres mine". This is a project where my "shard" assegned to this universe basically copies the imperium because, and im not joking, "the emperor is kind of a baka, but then again tzeentch is a thing so...". Also btw TTS is canon as SHIT. Like fr its all canon. Yes even the shadowsun fling, let kitten rest.

Pluripotent Impotence: an scp canon of mine thats basically "the foundation is so cold and clinical they MASSIVELY misunderstood shit". 6140, 6500, 5500 and 7000 are canon. 2718 and 5000 are in the files but they basically might as well not exist. 3812 is living tech support. 166 is in her early 20s and 239 is 19 and they fuck nasty (theyre also childhood friends. Girl Love i guess~) because fuck you clef love wins especially yuri go snort telekill dust. 2317 loves humans and thins theyre cute and squishy and when its seventh child turned out to be fucking JoyBoy? Yeah get this: he DID condemn the fortune teller that was like "dude your sevent child is one of those prophecy children that are so in vogue these days" but also messed with fate so that her death ended up being the coolest and most inspiring shit ever because he was like "considering the average Evil King story, i might as well just... let this happen! Maybe i can convince my literal offspring to spare me!" And it fucking worked. Also a bunch of shit is canon. @i-am-dado looks like a Kpop star and is somft. Dr Jack bright is my character and mine alone and also elias shaw is there i guess. My OC bangs the first one of these 2 amulet boys on a regular basis and the second one occasionally, dont ask why is there a gay polycule when im straight, there are some things that escape my mind. I have been in SCP for a long time and regardless of me making my account 6/1/2024 (LA BEFANAH) i have been here longer than you believe in. From my perspective it took a year before a 5000 contest was announced, so fcuk yoyu

Earth-ℵ₀: the best way to take care of the DC and Marvel universes is... let an autistic dude fix damages done by money-hungry idiots in hollywood. The joker is unimportant. Dr.Manhattan is Done With This Shit. I made a squad with random charachters i like. Lmao suck on uranium rods UwU

ytposting: (Funkdela Catalogue: Encounter starts playing)

Omni-shit: ben 10 is actually a good series guys, and the reboot is an interesting way of showing what would Ben 10 Classic look like if it was made Now

1% enhancement: basically i look at something and go like "hey what if the charachters were basically part me but not in a Knights of the Apocalypse way"

Tumblr italia: aò sono italiano che cos'altro vi aspettate

components: basically i use tumblr as image hosting. LoL.

Items: images turned undertale items. For reference, i have 2³¹-1 HP and my stats are ATK 100000 and DEF 65535. Yes the attack is a yugioh zexal reference. NOSTALGIA IS PTSD BUT GOOD.

Mungeon Deshi: dunmeshi is a good anime and marcille is italian

Full Nelson Analchemist: if FMA exists in my presence im going to give the 20k mg weed gummy to Truth

Evangelion 4.0: look, hideki anno has gone insane. Every time he makes evangelion as the most brain damaging version of telling someone to go touch grass people inevitably miss the point. I take it upon myself to give the @jakei95 treatment to the poor creatures (also fun fact: KAWOSHIN CANON. THEY KISS ON SCREEN. FUCK YOU AMERICA.)

The hoes are stuck: homestuck. What you thought they were safe from my grasp? 人間 you havent seen sheiße.

FeeF the BeeB: minecraft mod bullsheiße

[[Nothing Is Worth The Risk]]: lets just say that sometimes, the multiverse isnt that "cool and good"

Ultimate Sonic: i have a Sonic AU where... uhm... just. If i have a post about that. Just look at it. LoL.

Multiverse Polls: i make tHEM-

Autistic and Artistic: (draws happily)

Side effects of reading this blog can vary between true insight into the inner workings of the universe and self-defenestration from the top of the burj khalifa.

Anyways welcome to the multiverse

Do yourself a favour and dont go out without a loaded gun.

[moeitsu]

This shit-post is dedicated to my weird ass friends and the most out of pocket things they've said that I've written in the quote book I've kept in my notes since 2019. Enjoy:

The mayonnaise did wonders for my hair. -P

The Holy Spirit does not want to suck your balls. -E

That's the scariest thing about Halloween...young women. -N

You can put long pasta in there! -E You mean spaghetti? -M

I don't know what blood type I am, is there an app for that? -G

You already said you wouldn't eat my ass -E

What's your major? -K Oh, I'm American. -G

I'm gonna shit in that trash can. -G

Are we about to exchange insurance cards? -J

I'm pretty sure I don't wanna warm my pussy by the fire. -M

Ugh, I don't wanna be a femboy! -M

If you're so worried about the angles then just stick your fingers in the hole. -M

I wish I could be off the grid. -M Like homeless people? -E

Who needs bleach when you have discharge. -J

Why are there panties in your hat? -G

I think I'm mentally disabled. -M No, you're just mentally ill. -E

It could be a deer with down syndrome. -D

I remember when the only app they had was angry birds. -J

Now that's the kind of guy who should be reproducing. -J

Cute rhymes with stupid. -N

No arms, no legs, not even living. But watches porn. -R

Sweaty balls doesn't sound very appetizing. -T

You're starting to look like a real girl again. -N

I always poop in other people's houses. It's how I establish dominance. -T

No sir, I am from Boston. All I know is drink coffee and cuss. -M

The gas station bathroom was treacherous. Pretty sure I saw blood on the walls. -C

If it doesn't cure you, it'll kill you! -Z

Bone dry dunes? That's where you go when you run out of cum. -E

I live by the thee S's: serve, slay, survive. -G

I will not participate in the ass licking. -E

You white people always have cool ancestors. My ancestors were slaves. -S My ancestors were responsible for that. -G

That gives me a free pass to call you a bitch. I'll take it. -N

Would anyone wanna buy my wick-less candles? Shameless plug I know. -K

C'mere, come into my womb. -G

I like your dads meat. -E

Our family funds the entire therapy on the north shore. -B

You can't be this smart w/o massive mental health problems. -B

She doesn't like gay people? -M Nope, she's up in the air about black people too. -P

We're back to our regularly scheduled racism. -R

That's abortion money, not pedicure money. -K

I'm gonna give you a disability if you don't stop. -M

I can always fuck up chicken. Especially the breast. -N

Nice parking job Alabama. Was your sister giving you head while you were driving? -N

I don't think calories are real. I've never seen one. -M

Do you even know what man boobs are? -E It's literally in the name. -M

Can't men flick their nipples off? -E

Well, 5 out of 6 of us were born with a full spine. -E

What's the point of having a gf if you can't objectify her? -N

Mother fucker we don't own straws. We broke as shit. -N

You're like a lollipop triple dipped in psycho flavor. -P

What are you just not gonna feed your kid so you can afford to go to Disney? -A

Do you think she's trans? Like she was a dude and now she's a guy? -N You mean she was a dude and now she's a girl? -M

The boogeyman wants to suck you're toes. -M He would never, he's asexual. -P

We need a new toilet. -P This is American made! This is a quality toilet! -A

There's no one as Irish as Barack Obama. -N

She called me autistic! -P Well, it couldn't hurt to get tested. -A

The shirt says 'wicked strong' -M It should say 'wicked annoying' -N

What bitch is blowing up your phone? -M Literally your Dad. -N

I'm a white girl, of course I love cheese. -S

Why do bad things keep happening to me? Don't they know who I am! -N

It's because I feel safe here. -M Well, maybe you shouldn't. -N

The real magic happens when you embrace the delusion. -K

Oh look, the Trump tower! What if it just blows up? -R

I'm gonna be honest, I didn't finish the Bible. It's on my DNF shelf. Adam and Eve? I need enemies to lovers. -B

A woman bit me, I'm gonna become a prostitute. No! -S

Technically, I'm bisexual. -M You're too old for labels. -G

[mrhowells]

Smallville 4x03

such an iconic episode, I'm so ready😩 (edit: ignore any typos you might find, I was going through it💀)

NOOOOOOOO THIS IS SO FKN FUNNY PLS LOOK AT THIS MAN'S HAIR I CAN'T BREATHE

Honestly I'm so thankful that not a single one of my schools was like this, it's like everyone just reached an unspoken agreement that bullying was uncool and we'd mind our own business.

needles😬

"Have I told you how much I'm gonna miss you?"

no you haven't but you definitely should, go on😌

*in unison* around where????

HELL YEAH FORCED PROXIMITY FTW

"Come on, do you know how many people would kill to relive their senior year of high school?"

No way in hell, and I had a relatively peaceful experience💀😭

"The last thing I want to be is a reporter."

She would absolutely be perfect but let's get one thing straight: If there's a person on this show who knows when to mind their own fucking business, it's LOIS🤷🏻‍♀️

I mean both Chloe and Lois make valid points, she's 17 and while I totally understand why Abby did it, it really is a bit concerning. Especially considering her mother has been pushing her to do it for the last 3 years😬

I got a comment from a helpful user under my post for last episode (ty🥰), apparently Jason is roughly the same age as Lex?? And he started dating Lana when she was 17?? AND HE'S THE FKN ASSISTANT COACH AT SCHOOL?

Clark wants to try out for the team again🥺

Jonathan let Martha have a job off the farm dude come on, be supportive. YES THANK YOU

omg did he fake his parent's signature on the permission slip???

"...they want people to look at them differently."

he's making points🤷🏻‍♀️

UGH I'm so weak for happy, excited Clark just look at himmm😭🥹

"Maybe if I'd been more patient I would've seen who you really are." EEEEEEEW throw the whole man away🤢

honestly fuck everyone who destroyed her self-esteem to the point where she's flattered bc a crusty man like that shows interest

asjaksjaksj

he's not even denying it-

PLSSSS their faces, especially Lois😭

I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOR

and look at Lois "not interested in journalism" Lane right on the story😌😌😌

I'm connecting some dots here and I don't like ittttt😬😬

"I still can't believe that you have a job at my school."

I feel like Lana has had more personality in these last few episodes than she had in the last 3 seasons combined, so that's great to see.

Lex knowssss👀

OMFG LOIS I LOVE YOU

I'mghfdjfghdj LOIS ARE U FREE ON MONDAY-

look at herrrrr😭 LISTEN IF I HAD CLARK'S POWERS-

I mean I agree that beauty is on the inside but that's very easy to say when you look like a literal angel💀 OOp evil surgery lady just said the same thing I did idk how to feel about that💀💀

I love that they're already establishing little things about her, she's messy, she can't spell etc. (though Chloe sounded a bit passive aggressive in both instances, maybe I'm just reading it wrong tho😬)

"It looks like Lois is one step ahead of us." THAT MAKES ME SO PROUD🥺🥺

Clark saving Lois and then Lois saving Clark is something so personal to me actually-

UGH LOOK AT THEMMMMMM😭

*kicks woman* "Bitch."

her lil smile seeing her article in the torch😭

yesss she has fans as she fucking should😌

(Can I just quickly say that as much as I love Homecoming, they could've had at least ONE person at the reunion remember Lois from high school, watching that shit left permanent scars on my soul, it was so cruel😭 Like come on, if reading her article was a "life changing experience" for some students, it would make total sense for SOMEONE to remember her. (yes I'm super salty and what about it))

FUUUUUUUCK I JUST REALIZED I HIT THE 30 IMAGE LIMIT AND I'M NOT EVEN AT THEE DUNK TANK SCENE😭 (off to delete some of them I guess😭)

omg here it comes

"Come on Lois, didn't those guys at the base teach you anything?" "Wouldn't you like to know."

akasjkasdjak YOU KNOW HE WOULD

they wanna bone so bad it makes them look like absolute fucking clowns there I said it

DOESN'TMATTERCAUSEYOU'REGOINGDOWNTHAT'LLBETHEDAYSKADWNKW can you tell I'm losing my last shred of dignity here

ALTERED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY CLEARED MY SKIN IMPROVED MY GRADES WALKED MY DOGS ETC THIS SCENE CHANGED MY WHOLE FUCKING LIFE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND-

and Tumblr won't even let me upload my 5732893 screenshots where's the justice😭

[jovianaquarium]

ok so my lovely mutual @icarrymany dared me to post proof of my rock/min collection so this is his fault >:)

im not gonna go into depth on all of the samples bc 1. i dont remember the details on all of them lol and 2. it would take. forever

so instead ill talk a little abt one or two of them per section :3

first up: tumbled minerals!

i have a bunch more of these but after becoming a geology student they kind of piss me off bc raw minerals often look way cooler and tumbling removes the crystal habit (and also makes them harder for me to identify hgjhfd)

first image, from left clockwise: (possibly) blue lace agate, chrysocolla. labradorite, snowflake obsidian, moss agate, brown agate, and two samples of tigers eye

2nd image: up close picture of one of the tigers eye crystals, showing its lighter banding

3rd image: up close picture of the labradorite from a different angle, showing its pale green luster

my absolute favorite mineral ever is labradorite also!! i think its luster is gorgeous and ive heard it represents transformation and change, and i first got this sample back when i had just come out as trans :)

i dont really have a lot to say abt these unfortunately lol

anyway. next is fossils!!

1st image, clockwise from bottom left: trilobite cast fossil, tumbled stromatolite, dinosaur bone (? got this one at a mineral stall and the dude said it was a dino bone, didnt think to ask details lol), plant fossil, coral fossil, assorted fossil molds (mold as in taking the shape of something, not spores) in wackestone, mosasaurus tooth, crocodile (?) tooth, 2 ammonites, a turtle scute, a crinoid stem, and a (broken) orthoceras

2nd image: up close pic of the assorted fossil molds, which include horn corals (circular with ridges toward center, hole in middle), crinoid stems (cylindrical with ridges perpendicular to long sides), and shells

3rd image: up close pic of larger ammonite, with iridescent luster due to aragonite (a polymorph of calcite) replacing the calcite of the shell

4th image: up close pic of dubious tooth. i found this on a field trip about a year ago while looking for shark teeth. this is not a shark tooth. idk what it is. i think it might be from a crocodile but i havent been able to fully identify it lol

now.... raw minerals!!!!!

1st image, clockwise from left: moss agate, talc, serpentinite (this one is a metamorphic rock but i accidentally put it with the minerals and dont want to retake the pics. other geologists you may come kill me), two calcite samples, and a tiny topaz @ramones2 gave me

2nd pic: close up on the topaz crystal, which is light orange (if u leave these in the sun they get bleached and lose their color </3)

3rd pic: close up on one of the calcites. its crystals are a bit more squared and close-knit than the next calcite, and appear more white in color. there are also some small purple fluorite crystals mixed in. i traded with a classmate for this one lol

4th pic: close up on the other calcite. this ones crystals are more rounded and transparent.

5th pic: close up on the serpentinite. serpentinite is metamorphosed from peridotite, which makes up the earth's mantle (if youve ever heard that the mantle is actually green, that is true!! the green comes from olivine mostly, but also some pyroxenes). when peridotite is lifted up to the surface and comes into contact with water, olivine gets very unhappy and serpentinizes, or hydrothermally metamorphoses (water + some heat + olivine = cool as fuck snakeskin rock)

6th pic: another close up on the serpentinite, this time wet. you can see the serpent-like pattern a bit better.

finally: rocks :3

1st image, clockwise from bottom left: amphibolite, sedimentary rock with calcite vein (i dont remember what this one is lmao), malachite-bornite ore, iron-stained sandstone(?) with chalcedony/agate, phyllite, sandstone trace fossil of a burrow, and meteoric rock possibly with iron

2nd pic: close up on the ore, showing the malachite vein. it's almost powdery, with a gradient of light blue on the edges to teal in the center

3rd pic: another close up on the ore, showing the bornite vein. it's iridescent like an oil slick, with the main color being purple. this one is often called peacock ore for its colors :)

4th pic: . im gonna be honest i have no fucking clue bro. i think the mineral in it is agate/chalcedony (the lighter gray/white areas) and the red parts are an iron-stained sedimentary rock, but i forget if its siltstone or sandstone or smth else. idk. it looks cool.

bonus: extra pic of my rocks for further proof of collection

hope u enjoyed o7