#i find myself wishing i could be that chill about it
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MISSION SUCCESS!
the inner machinations of my pants are an enigma
#ive been discovering lately as i shift my irl presentation different ways#that i dislike being assumed to be man or woman pretty much equally#if i was born something else i still wouldve ended up in the middle yk#and i think thats really interesting#it kinda demonstrates how for me at least social dysphoria is built up over time and not some inherent reaction to 1 thing#the more i get put in either of the two 'standard' boxes the less comfortable i feel in that box regardless of which one#i know a lot of people who are agender or nonbinary in a “anything works idc” sorta way#i find myself wishing i could be that chill about it#tho even if i was itd be a tossup whether id get weird looks in whatever gendered bathroom i went in. so i dont as much as possible#someday maybe ill feel comfortable calling myself a woman or a man interchangeably and thatd be neato#but for now i just. Nope. Nope nope nope#sometimes you'll see me call myself a guy or a gal and for some reason the informality is appealing to me#still depends on like. The weather and the alignment of the planets and whatever the fuck /j but#i do really think it should be more socially normal to not broadcast your genitals#like. thats between me my partner/s and my doctor yk#itd do a world of good for trans and intersex people if it becomes more widely accepted that genitals dont correlate with appearance#and that changing your appearance is not the same as lying about your genitals#still thinking about how i had to sign a paper once certifying that i wasn't doing gender fraid or whatever tf. What even#but anyway. haha free rant ?????#tag ramble#fallow buzzes#mutuals#gender
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go fish!
so i fell in love with Sanji just like everyone else. i've never seen the one piece anime or read the manga so i'm solely going off of the live action. i had fun writing this and plan to make this a series of some sorts where it's a fem!reader x Sanji moments of awkwardness, fluff, and mutual pining because i love reading that stuff myself. if anyone has any suggestions or requests for this series please leave a comment or send me an ask!
WARNINGS: none
word count: 1.3k
pairing: opla!sanji x reader
summary: reader and Usopp are playing a card game when Sanji finds them. teasing ensues.
prequel part 2 part 3 part 4 masterlist
“Care for a refreshment, Madam?” a smooth, deep familiar voice asked to your left, breaking your concentration on the card game in front of you.
“Hm?” you looked up from the cards in your hand and saw the Going Merry��s own chef looking down at you with a crooked, charming smile as he held a chilled glass bottle of water in his hand. “Oh, hey Sanji,” you greeted quickly with your usual smile as you looked back down at your hand. “What’d you say? Go fish Usopp.”
Your opponent across the barrel from you grumbled as he took the top card off the deck sitting between you both.
“I was just asking if the lovely madam sitting here would like a nice, cold refreshment on this particularly hot day?” Sanji asked again with a hint of amusement, his crooked smile deepening as he watched you study your hand once again.
“’Lovely madam’?” Usopp repeated sarcastically, his eyebrows pulling together. “What about offering her super buff, brave, and heroic opponent an ice-cold beverage instead?”
“Nope,” Sanji corrected, popping the 'p'. “Ladies first Usopp. Always.”
Even after knowing Sanji for a couple of months now, his consistent chivalry always managed to make your heart flutter.
You laughed lightly and couldn’t help but smirk as you said with a matter-of-fact, teasing tone, “Just say you wish you were a girl, Usopp. No judgment here.” You paused for a moment before asking, “You got the five of spades?”
“Now even though I would make an extremely attractive, gorgeous woman, I am a man through and through.” A grin broke out on Usopp’s face as he glanced at his hand and triumphantly called out, “Go fish, y/n.”
“Fair enough,” you hummed as you reached for a card. “And yes Sanji, I would love a glass of cold water. Thank you.” You shot a quick look of gratitude the chef’s way as you took a card from the deck.
Sanji placed the two glasses onto your makeshift barrell-table top he was holding in his left hand and started filling up the glasses with water. “Of course. Anything for the missus.”
Missus. Ugh. It made your heart skip a beat to hear him call you that. But you knew he didn’t really mean anything by it. It was just how Sanji spoke, forever the gentleman.
“Oof. If you keep sweet talking like that Sanji, you’re going to even make me blush, just like y/n,” Usopp joked.
Your eyes widened as your eyes snapped to look at your dumbass crewmate and friend sitting across from you. “I- I am not blushing Usopp!” God, if you both were using a real table instead of a barrel right now you would’ve broken his shine with your foot. You really weren’t blushing before but Usopp’s stupid comment definitely made your cheeks heat up now. “It’s the heat,” you hissed.
“’Heat’,” he mocked with air quotes and snorted. “Right.”
“I-” before you could defend yourself, Sanji spoke up.
“Actually,” the blonde chef chimed in with a light laugh as he filled the second glass, “that’s why I came over in the first place. You were looking a little flushed y/n, so I thought you guys could use a cold drink.”
Sanji’s words caused both you and Usopp to look up from your cards simultaneously, making eye contact with each other. A mischievous grin started to form on Usopp’s face as he saw the blush deepen on your face. You quickly looked back to your hand, suddenly finding the eight of clovers card extremely interesting.
Sanji saw you looking flushed? He saw you? From across the deck? From inside the kitchen’s window? He was watching you play cards? The thought of Sanji watching you when you didn’t expect him to made your stomach erupt in butterflies, and it certainly didn’t make your stupid little crush on him go away. Just the opposite. In fact, it just fueled your delusional fantasy even more.
And it certainly didn’t help that the only person who knew about your crush on the head chef just so happened to have a big mouth and loved to tease you about it any chance he got. And that he was sitting right across from you right now, watching all of this unfold right in front of him.
“Oh? So you were watching y/n and I play cards out here?” Usopp innocently asked his blonde crewmate, but you knew better. There wasn’t an ounce of true curiosity in his tone whatsoever.
“Yeah, from the kitchen,” Sanji answered casually as he recapped the glass water bottle.
“Usopp,” you warned.
“And you said that she looked ‘flushed’?” Usopp asked, quirking a brow at the end of his question as he turned his gaze from you to Sanji.
Sanji blinked in confusion, his eyebrows knitting together for a second before looking down at his crewmate. “Yeah...” he said slowly before continuing, “Her cheeks looked a little pink so I figured-”
“Oh?” Usopp asked, his voice becoming louder. “You noticed the color of her cheeks, from that far away?”
“Usopp,” you hissed louder but it fell on deaf ears. Once your friend got on a roll, there was little anyone could do about it. Especially when it came to teasing you about your feelings for Sanji.
“Yeah,” Sanji replied to Usopp’s question with a confused smile. “What are you-”
“GO FISH!” you blurted out loudly, cutting Sanji off and having both men turn their eyes towards you.
“Huh?” Usopp blinked his eyes at you, suddenly remembering the game in front of him. “But I didn’t even ask you anything y/n. And you just drew a card, so it’s your turn to ask me.”
You let out a quiet sigh of relief at the fact that Usopp stopped grilling Sanji with all of those embarrassing questions right in front of you....even though you couldn’t help but perk up at the fact that Sanji in fact had been watching you from the kitchen, and that he was sweet enough to bring you (and Usopp) some water.
“Well, I tried,” you shrugged and lied, “but you just kept yapping so you didn’t hear me. Do you have the Queen of hearts?”
Usopp studied you for a brief moment before looking at his cards, smirking to himself. “You know y/n, it’s funny you asked about the Queen of hearts,” he said as he plucked the requested card from his hand and reached out to give it to you, “since you make heart eyes yourself whenever you look at-”
“GOOD game Usopp!” you practically yelled as you threw your cards down onto the barrel and stood up, hoping your outburst drowned out the name Usopp was about to so stupidly blurt out. You shook his free hand with both of yours as you said, “You totally win my friend.”
“What?” Sanji laughed slightly as he watched you and Usopp shake hands. The poor guy was as confused as ever. “But the game isn’t over.”
You looked Usopp dead in the eye as tightened your grip on his hand. “Oh no, it’s over. He definitely won.”
Yeah, he won alright. He won the game of making your life a living hell and embarrassing you in front of Sanji. He won the gold medal in that game.
“I sure did,” Usopp agreed triumphantly, putting his cards down.
You dropped his hand and took the glass of cold water that Sanji had so generously poured, the cold glass making you feel better already. “Thank you for this Sanji. I think I’ll go enjoy this on my hammock inside.”
You couldn’t bear to look at Sanji, feeling humiliated for no reason with your face on fire, you stepped away from the barrel sipping your water as you made your way across the deck towards the ship’s living quarters.
“Yeah, that’s a good idea y/n!” Usopp called, giddy from the high that could only come from successfully teasing a friend. “Maybe that’ll help calm down your flushed face!”
Before stepping inside, you flipped off a laughing Usopp, completely missing the brief look of disappointment in Sanji’s eyes as he watched you go.
#sanji x reader#sanji vinsmoke x reader#sanji#sanji vinsmoke#one piece#one piece live action#opla#one piece fanfiction#sanji fanfiction#fluff#opla fanfiction#i absolutely loved writing this and will write more#have this be a series of some sorts#bc who doesn't love idiots in love?#mutual pining#sanji x y/n#one piece x reader#go fish! au
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White Marriage (2)
[ Kingdom of Heaven • King Baldwin x female ]
[ warnings: fingering, virginity loss, sex content, poetic smut, angst, a detailed description of the deadly disease and the unpleasant symptoms associated with it ]
[ description: After their nuptials, the court becomes even more divided. The King, however, wishes to spend the last years of his life experiencing the joys he finds in the closeness of his wife. His bride was never to lose her maidenhood, however, is what the King has proclaimed to his subjects what he really craves? ]
Author’s Note: After the warm reception of the first part, which I didn't expect at all, here is the second part of their story! I have to admit that I had a great time writing it and I love them. I tried to leave some realism and not forget about his illness and the fact that it is contagious.
Part Two of Paradise Fruit. Can be read as a standalone story.
Word count: 4.600
* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *
My other works: Masterlist
_____
Their nuptials were humble – apart from the Archbishop, who gave them his blessing, uniting them for eternity, they were accompanied only by Sibylla and her husband, enraged, thinking that the King was just fulfilling his sneaky plan.
He truly believed that he would have exposed her to such danger, condemning her to the cruel disease that tormented his members to try to beget an heir.
She was grateful to her Princess for lending her one of her beautiful, gold-embellished robes that day – Sibylla knew what purpose this marriage was intended to serve and that it would not change the order of succession.
She was to be his comfort, a moment of relief and solace, nothing more.
Nevertheless, she smiled, feeling happiness filling her heart, her king's gaze tender and full of affection, from which she felt warmth in her chest.
She thought that she had fallen in love with him.
Their marriage was announced to all and sundry, and she became a king's wife, but not a queen.
She was not bothered by this.
She was assigned a chamber right next to his – she could now visit him whenever she wished and did not have to worry about the King's honour.
As she walked into his quarters, clad only in a thin night robe, a smile of happiness adorned her face. Baldwin, though tired, also seemed pleased and rose at the sight of her.
"Wife." He said, entwining his hands behind his back.
His figure was all clad in white as usual, though the material of his wardrobe seemed thicker to her, a silver mask on his face.
To her surprise she noticed that his gloves were black, apparently made of leather.
She bowed to him, recognising that she was not intending to think about it now.
"My King. My husband. You are the man of your word." She whispered warmly, looking up at him from above her long lashes, feeling a pleasant tickle in her lower abdomen meeting his gaze, hot and dark.
"I am." He replied. "I couldn't deny myself this pleasure. It was an act of my selfishness, not my greatness."
She blinked, cocking her head, feeling for some reason amused by his words.
"Does it matter now?" She asked lightly – something flashed across his gaze, she thought he smiled.
"No. Not in the slightest."
She looked at him expectantly, waiting for his orders – he had announced that because of his disease he would not take her maidenhood and their marriage would be white, however, after what had gone on between them earlier, she did not think her husband would want to remain an ascetic in every aspect.
"Let me see you." He said finally, his voice like a sigh.
She knew what he meant, she knew what he wanted – she could see it in his gaze. Her hands rose to the small knot above her breasts, untying it, slipping the thin material of her nightgown off her shoulders in a light, gentle motion, remaining bare before him.
She shuddered, feeling the chill of the chamber surround her body despite the flames burning in the fireplace beside her, her lips parted as she noticed her king's gaze shift, misty and filled with a familiar, hot desire.
For a moment he looked at her with his head tilted, as if he was simply admiring her, nothing more.
"My physicians have said that the leather material, as opposed to linen, will ensure that you are protected from the touch of my bare skin and what it may cause." He said, tentatively extending his hand to her, and she felt her heart thump harder in her chest with joy.
She could touch him.
They both drew in a loud breath as she placed her fingers on his palm, letting him pull her a little closer, the spot between her thighs all swollen with desire, slowly growing moist with her wetness.
Her lips parted with her gasp of surprise as his other hand touched her cheek – she snuggled her face into it, placing affectionate kisses of her lips on it.
"I would give all the treasures of this chamber, my possessions and my gold coins to feel the taste of your lips on mine." He gasped, looking at her as if she were a precious jewel, a spring water that quenches thirst, an olive tree that feeds whole nations.
She closed her eyes, listening to the sound of the sizzling fire and their hitched breaths as his thumb ran over her full, lower lip. She parted it before him and let him slide it deeper, between her teeth. Her lips clamped slowly around his finger, looking up at him with desire as she began to suck.
A low groan escaped his throat at the sight, clearly imagining that he was forcing something completely different down her throat.
He placed his other hand on her back, at the same time pulling her closer and holding her at arm's length, apparently afraid that even his breath was dangerous to her, possibly dooming her to his fate.
She moaned when he gave in, when his mask pressed against her forehead, his eyelids all red around his bright pupils.
"– forgive me –"
She didn't know why his words, filled with so much sadness and desire, made her throw her hands on his shoulders, her lips clinging greedily to the unpleasantly cold, silver structure of his mask.
She closed her eyes, hearing his gasp of surprise, placing lingering, hot kisses full of her saliva and tongue on the surface of it, imagining he was able to feel it, his hands sinking into her hair.
"– touch me, husband – I crave you –" She mewled helplessly, running her hands over the material beneath which was his head, his hair, his jaw and neck.
She squealed when he lifted her suddenly by her buttocks, the quiet hiss that escaped his lips made her understand that this sudden movement must have caused him pain.
She stroked the back of his head as he moved towards his bed with his face nestled between her breasts, not wanting to show him any sympathy now that he wanted to be a strong man in her eyes.
He let out a breath as he laid her down on the soft sheets, his gaze full of tenderness as he looked at her face.
"– lie on your stomach and spread your thighs –" He said calmly and gently, however, something in his words and their undertone made her feel a heat in her lower abdomen and a wonderful tickling sensation.
She obeyed his command immediately, feeling her legs become stiff as he caught her around the waist and lifted her hips, forcing her to buck her buttocks in front of him in a shameless manner.
She heard his heavy breath as he positioned himself behind her on his knees, running his leather-gloved hands over the soft skin of her buttocks, herself panting hard, knowing where he was looking now.
"– the reason why Paris abducted Helen of Troy – the cause of the downfall and delight of all mankind locked deep between my wife's thighs –" He whispered in such a sensual way that she moaned pathetically, clenching her eyelids as his thumb ran over her leaking, throbbing womanhood.
Apparently he liked the sound she made, because one of his hands slid into her hair, holding her in place, reassuring him that she wouldn't take advantage of his weakness and try to expose him in an act of pleasure, endangering him and herself.
"– lie still – shhhh, my love –" He whispered, hearing her innocent cry of desperation as his fingers began to trail around her oversensitive, swollen bud, waves of tingling and tickling sensations spreading through her body dulling her mind, causing her to emit uncontrollable sounds.
She could hear him panting as she watched what he was doing to her, his fingers digging into her delicate folds with a loud click of her wetness, barely teasing her – her hips began to roll back and forth, responding to his treatments, trying to find a better source of rubbing.
"– have mercy on me –" She mumbled with difficulty, her lips parted wide in a girlish moan when, at her request, the tip of his middle finger burst into her fleshy, hot interior.
The experience was at once full of discomfort and delight – at first the material of his glove was cold, but in time her body temperature enveloped him with its heat.
"– God – so warm –" He whispered in a voice trembling with emotion, in some involuntary, primitive reflex forcing her to take his finger deeper inside her, meeting resistance.
"– yes or no –" He breathed out, making her gasp.
Yes or no.
She froze, feeling her heart begin to pound like mad, knowing that he had lied: he had only declared their marriage as white so that after his death his sister's husband would not attempt to kill her out of fear that she might be carrying his heir.
The future King.
"– yes –"
Her fingers clenched on the fabric of the sheet beneath her as he pierced something inside her in one aggressive motion, along with her squeal taking her maidenhood.
She began to wriggle under him with sweet whimpers of delight as his first finger was joined by a second, opening her wide for him only to fuck her before his eyes.
Tears of pleasure and shock ran down her cheeks as she moaned like a mere whore, spreading her thighs wider, his fingers thicker and longer than hers, stretching her so wonderfully.
"– please –" She whimpered, responding with her hips to each thrust of his hand, the tips of his fingers hitting the sweet spot deep inside her with startling precision again and again, while his thumb teased her little pearl between her folds with reluctance.
She bucked up more, panting loudly along with him, feeling the drops of her own wetness begin to run down her thighs one by one, soaking his hand, the fingers of his free palm clenched in her hair.
"– go on – please your King –" He commanded in a low voice from which her weeping cunt clenched around his fingers in convulsions of ecstasy, the sweet, stupefying pleasure making her cry out loudly, her legs bent at the knees quivering all over from the exertion.
"– a-ah –" She mumbled out, her face red with emotion as her body shook with a fulfilment so strong that her leaking, hot walls began to simply suck him inside. He felt it and moaned in a boyish manner, stopping moving, keeping his two fingers slipped deep into her body, just wanting to feel how it pulsed around them.
"– yes – just like that – easy now – easy –" He praised her, slowly sliding them out of her, and she swallowed hard, letting her body fall back onto the bed, panting loudly.
She sighed as he turned her onto her back and spread her thighs, looking at her with eyes black with desire, his hand slipped under the material of his robe.
Only then did she notice that his garment had a slit in the area underneath where his manhood was.
Although he had not allowed her to look at it then, now that he had grasped it in his hand and directed it at her throbbing womanhood, she saw the fat, pink head of it, dripping with his desire.
His hand clamped down on her soft breast, careful, however, not to cause her pain as he began to squeeze his swollen erection in his palm, with sharp, aggressive strokes from the very base to the tip chasing his fulfilment.
She moaned innocently, surprised, tilting her head back as his thumb ran over her hard, sensitive nipple, playing with it, something like satisfaction flashed through his gaze when he saw that this kind of touch was giving her pleasure.
"– my wife is so eager – so devoted to her poor husband – hm? –" He gasped, his breathing heavy as he accelerated, already squeezing only the base of his manhood, rocking his hips back and forth, struggling to restrain himself from opening her up, from sinking into her, from feeling her.
She rolled her hips forward encouragingly, rubbing her moist cunt against the thick head of his erection, drawing a low, almost animalistic groan from his throat, his silhouette moving slightly away.
"– no –" He growled with pain and anger, involuntarily returning again and again to her warmth, letting the tip of it push against her swollen, thirsty slit.
"– please, my King – put inside me –" She begged, but he shook his head and simply came with a loud moan of pleasure, his pearly, sticky spend spewing onto her womanhood.
He stared at this shameless sight, his head bowed low, his breath heavy as if he had just accomplished some heroic feat.
"– you need to bathe in hot water – immediately – dress yourself, I'll call the servants –" He exclaimed, rising abruptly from the bed, covering his manhood back with his robe, wiping his hand sticky with her wetness into its material.
She stood up quickly, horrified that he was surely angry with her for not listening to him, hastily dressing her nightgown over her shoulders, bursting into sobs.
"– forgive me, my King – forgive me, do not send me away –" She begged, but he did not listen to her, ordering his servant to immediately bring the tub into his chamber and fill it with hot water.
Although it slightly burned her skin when she stepped inside, her husband-king explained that the heat killed whatever was spreading his disease, and the oils and herbs that were thrown in were to prevent any other infections.
She looked at him with big eyes as he sat beside her, dipping his leather-gloved hand into the water along with a piece of cloth, sinking it then between her thighs, making sure not a single drop of his seed remained on it.
"– will you forgive me, my beloved? –" She muttered pleadingly, watching his face. He looked at her with a chastising look and sighed heavily.
"– it is I who should beg your forgiveness – I have allowed myself to be carried away by my desires, which have suppressed my reason – do not fear, it will not happen again – after your bath you will return to your chamber and will no longer visit me in the evenings –" He said calmly, looking away.
Her heart stopped in her throat, her brow arching in pain and disbelief at his words.
"Are you sending me away?" She muttered with difficulty. He looked at her, surprised apparently by her question and reaction, his hand froze in mid-motion.
"You can't sleep here because I am here. My breath, my proximity are deadly. I am exposing you even now. Before sleep, my physicians pull off most of the fabric that covers my body. I will never let you see this." He said and swallowed hard, seeing as tears one by one began to run down her cheeks.
"You break my heart. At least let my bed be placed next to yours. Drape it with curtains so that I may not see you or your body at night, but that I may at least hear your voice, hear your presence in the same chamber." She said pleadingly, touching his beautiful silver mask with her hand, his gaze tired and sad, filled with pain.
He hesitated.
"The chamber is not locked. Place my bed by the windows, by the fresh air. Do not condemn me to solitude, show me mercy, my King." She whispered, once again placing a kiss on his mask, on his cold, silver lips, his sigh testifying that he pressed his lips on the other side, reciprocating her caress.
"You are my doom."
At his command, her bed was moved to his chamber, raising voices full of resentment from some of the monks and priests, commenting on the fact that her maidenhood might be called into question.
"White marriage, to my knowledge, does not mean that husband and wife live separately. On the contrary, we should indulge in prayers together and be each other's comfort by day and night."
Honour Knights and Lords were concerned about what kind of comfort his little wife was to him.
Each day, the physicians sent by King Saladin checked the condition of her body and whether there were any signs of infection – her husband watched it from the sidelines in horror, relief in his gaze each time he heard from their lips that his wife was in good health.
However, taking advantage of the fact that the King had left the chamber after her examination, returning to his duties, one of his medics approached her, pale.
"My Lady. Spending so much time in the King's company, you will certainly contract his disease. Often its first symptoms do not appear until years after infection. It is possible that it is already too late." He muttered, bowing before her.
She swallowed loudly, looking at him calmly, feeling discomfort in her stomach.
"Would my husband live to see the time when the first symptoms could be apparent? If it turned out I was infected." She mumbled, and he shook his head.
"No, my Lady."
She smiled at his words and nodded.
"Thank you. Assure my King that I am well and can abide with him as before."
The man looked at her, in his eyes disbelief but at the same time a kind of admiration, compassion and warmth from which she felt a squeeze in her throat.
"My Lady."
The days in Jerusalem were often sunny and hot, and as her husband rejoiced at the sight of her bare body, she walked around his chambers naked, feeling like a Greek goddess, Aphrodite or Artemis.
She would read old volumes, play the lute or embroider while spreading out comfortably on large cushions so that he could see her, and he would admire her from afar like a nymph.
"– my wife is like a fruit of paradise – like a goddess born of the sea foam –" He murmured, looking at her contentedly, bent over the dozens of parchments spread out on his table.
The servants knew that they could not enter his quarters without permission, for although he was gentle and affectionate in his manner, he did not wish to share this shameless sight with anyone.
However, what most of their days consisted of were conversations.
Her husband was a great speaker – they were discussing the Bible, faith, philosophy, poetry, art, war and history for long hours.
At nights, when he couldn't sleep from his pain, hearing his sighs and quiet moans that he tried to suppress for her sake, she would ask him questions.
She couldn't touch his hands or embrace him – his body needed rest, to breathe to keep from rotting and for at least a few hours a day it was supposed to be uncovered.
"Christ says to the adulteress: go and sin no more. However, he knows, as God incarnate, that this is not his command, but a recommendation. Sin is the fatal disease of every human being and we all sin in thought, in speech, in deed, in neglect. This is no reason to be sad. Christ is merely saying: live in such a way as not to cause yourself or others suffering, try to live with dignity, in harmony with yourself and your Father in Heaven."
"Is it known what happened to her afterwards?" She asked quietly, looking at his silhouette, seeing only its outline on the other side of his bed.
"Some identify her with Mary Magdalene or Mary, the sister of Martha and Lazarus. But it could also have been a person not mentioned by name in the Gospel. She certainly followed Christ and became one of his disciples." He said, his voice clearer without his mask, calm and soft.
"Do you think God considers me an adulteress?" She asked in a trembling voice and heard him shift restlessly in his bed.
"Why should such an unjust and harsh judgment fall on my wife? Because she is devoted to me with her soul, heart and body? Haven't you done everything I asked of you and even more? You are as pure as the sheet I lie on, as the delicate fabrics I wear on my skin. Your beauty makes me even more aware of my ugliness." He whispered with pain that made her swallow hard, shocked by his words.
"To me, you are the most beautiful of men. Before I met you, I swore to God that I would never marry, that I would not share Sibylla's fate. He showed me mercy, filling my heart with a burning feeling for you, my beloved."
He was silent, but she heard him exhale loudly, his trembling sigh full of suffering.
He cried.
"If only you could look at my face, see what a disgusting caricature of a human I am, you would understand what a great mistake you made." He howled, choking on his own tears, clearly letting out what had been weighing on his heart for weeks.
The fear that if she accidentally saw his face, she would scream in terror and run away.
"Is your faith in me so weak? I hoped you think of me with respect." She mumbled, heartbroken, feeling a squeeze in her throat.
She heard him swallow hard at her words, clearly terrified that he had offended her.
"I do, my love. Forgive me."
"I fell in love with a human, not an earthly shell." She said, but he didn't answer her.
She watched the silhouette of her husband and his physicians each evening through the curtains, seeing them only as through a fog in the candlelight, their shadows dancing around her.
She could hear his hisses and cries of pain as they treated his wounds, see the outline of his head, always with his back turned to her.
When they were finally left alone and he lay down on his bed, she heard his sigh of relief, his face, though she couldn't see it, turned towards her.
"My sweetest?" He whispered, and she smiled warmly, feeling a wonderful delight in her heart every time he called her that.
"I'm here, my love." She murmured, twisting comfortably in her bed.
"I desire you."
She swallowed hard, feeling her warm womanhood throb around nothing.
"I desire you too, my beloved."
They were both silent for a long moment, the tension around them palpable in the air.
"– one of my physicians –" He began in a trembling voice. "– at my request, he created something that I can – put on my length so as not to touch you directly – from what I understand, he made it from the intestine of some animal and disinfected it – he assured me that it would be safe for both of us, but –"
"– yes –" She muttered, feeling her heart begin to pound like crazy at the thought that he wanted to do this to her.
"– you know it's a risk –" He said, his voice quivering with longing, the shadow of his silhouette turned towards her.
"– I knew it from the very beginning – I don't care what happens to my body – I just want to feel my beloved husband inside me –" She whispered with embarrassment and that seemed to be enough for him.
She heard him stand up, quickly putting the cloth and mask over his head as he appeared on the other side, beside her bed, looking as he usually did – the same black leather gloves on his hands, his fingers clenched on a small wooden box.
"– undress –" He commanded, and she did so, literally ripping off herself her nightgown, laying down on her stomach.
His silhouette was instantly next her, kneeling behind her buttocks, his breath hitched and quickened when she heard the rustling of something and another strange, sticky sound.
After a moment, his fingers tentatively and gently ran over her swollen, pink folds, collecting her wetness, which had already managed to trickle down her thigh.
"– no other treatments are needed – my sweet wife is leaking like a forest stream –" He hummed with delight and admiration, she felt her cheeks blush with embarrassment.
They both sighed as she felt something thick and hard begin to push against her puffy slit, opening her wide – despite her lack of preparation her cunt pulsed in delight, moist with desire.
The feeling of him deep inside her, so intense and definitive, of how hard his long, thick erection stretched her fleshy walls was shockingly pleasurable and terrifying at the same time, as if her body no longer belonged to her.
"– yes, yes, yes –" She mewled as she felt his hands clamp down on her buttocks, spreading them apart as if he were tearing a piece of fruit, another determined thrust of his hips sinking him completely into her hot core with their moans of pleasure.
"– fuck –"
She wasn't sure if he had ever cursed before, but then, as his hips immediately began to pound into her with loud slaps, nothing more than their panting, grunts and words insulting to God left his mouth.
"– we'll do it frequently – so that you can remember this feeling well – your husband deep inside your warmth –" He exhaled in a way from which her little cunt began to squeeze him greedily, sucking his erection inside, her lips parted wide in a loud, helpless whines of pleasure so strong that she had to close her eyes, her hands clenched on the bedding.
His gloved fingers dug into the delicate structure of her hips, imposing a more aggressive pace on her, his fat manhood bursting deep between her fleshy walls without slipping out of her, hitting again and again her sweet little spot.
"– yes – yes, I love you, I love you, I love you, please –" She cried out, feeling the tension in her silky womanhood reach its zenith, the pleasant tingling in her belly testifying to the fact that she was about to reach her peak with him and dreamed of nothing else.
He moaned low, slamming into her like mad, feeling her weeping core clench around his twitching length more and more, his manhood hard as a rock with desire.
"– G-God – oh, fuck, yes, yes, my sweetest, let me, ah –" He gasped in delight, coming deep inside her, filling the thin material overlying his manhood with his release.
Her eyes closed and her mouth parted wide as her peak came down on her like a thunderbolt, shaking her body with convulsions of delicious delight.
They both moaned and panted, rocking their hips for a moment more with the loud click of her slick cunt, his hands soothingly kneading the skin of her buttocks.
"– I will order more of this to be prepared – so that I can fulfil my marital duty every night –" He sighed with satisfaction.
She involuntarily smiled under her breath, looking up at him over her shoulder, the moonlight shining outside the window reflected in his mask.
"– what kind of white marriage is this? –" She asked teasingly, rolling her hips, feeling his half-soft manhood pulsate inside her again.
"– our kind – do not fret – I will explain it to God once I am before him – I will tell him that I loved my wife too much –"
_____
Author's note: Between their wedding day and this next act, weeks actually pass during which he doesn't touch her (she mentions the days spent in his company and how she is examined every day, how he watches her naked, but apart from that nothing happens between them). He is afraid that if he tries to touch her again, he won't hold back (he had already had difficulty not taking her on their wedding night), so he tried to think of something so as not to touch her directly with his manhood. Their intimacy is an act of their desperation, the pain of knowing that their marriage will last a year or two at most. The desire to touch her and feel her is as strong in him as the desire to protect her and push her away. Their love is tragic and complete to me, and she knows what she is risking (she knew from the very beginning).
#kingdom of heaven#the kingdom of heaven#kingdom of heaven fandom#kingdom of heaven fanfiction#kingdom of heaven fanfic#baldwin#king baldwin iv#king baldwin x reader#baldwin x reader#baldwin x female#baldwin of jerusalem#baldwin iv#kingdom of heaven 2005#king baldwin#king baldwin fanfiction#baldwin fanfic#baldwin x oc#the leper king#baldwin iv smut#baldwin smut#baldwin king#baldwin fanfiction#kingdom of heaven film#baldwin x wife#baldwin x wife reader
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Can we see a c! Wilbur design maybe? (If you're chill w/ it) Or Technoblade and Philza?
I’m planning on doing a whole separate ref for Wil at some point so I will do both Blade and Philza for you… im really really normal about Techno like really serious I promise you. ( <- lying through his fucking teeth. ) LOTTTTS OF DESIGN PARTICULARS WITH HIM. I deviate a lot from his skin ( for one I get way too engrossed with drawing animals so humanoid it is. ) but I make his outfit more errr. Flashy…? Also southern inspo all over this bitch. as a southern man myself I am forced to give him ( modest ) matador esque pants and a bolo …. I think putting him in that is hilarious cause the closest things piglins have to bulls are fucking hoglins LMFAO. Imagine him in a Nether rodeo … terrifying … Away from design in general I love his character sooo much. I think its important to keep his funny nerd qualities when designing him. Like techno is a beast with technical skills and combat but if you ask him to sit in a room with more than about 3 people he starts sweating. Make him a little loser guys … hes got like one friend total and lives in the middle of nowhere in the snow as a Nether mob. Nothing normal about him. No bitches and no gains …
PHIL …. ghh … I have an unpopular take on him because i dont find him very fatherly. Hes more like an estranged uncle who dgaf about his kids. Shanks from one piece if you will. As much as I like his dynamics, for his character I feel like people are constantly glossing over the fact he isolates himself on purpose away from everything and everyone so he doesn’t have to deal with it … Him and Techno are so close because 1) They’re both crazy fucking good at everything and 2) Neither of them WANT to interact with others outside of themselves usually. Techno most often times only talks to people for his own personal gain or when he has no choice … Philza just get dragged into everything cause Wilbur is like a damn blight on the world. IDK! I wish people made him more aloof or terrifying because the concept of him is so genuinely freaky like hes got spies everywhere all the time and could or could not be immortal or some sort of biblical creature like THATS SCARY!!! I tried to mess around with him being green and the Minecraft equivalent of souls ( exp drop when you die ) being the same shade-ish …. Hes just some eldritch horror to me. Not explainable by mere words…
#drawntracks#dsmp#technoblade#philza#emerald duo#theyre also kind of qpr#In a really specific immortal ‘I can meet anyone but still only know you’ type way#Sorry Phil is so lack luster its hard as shit for me to visualize what he is in my brain into reality.#Ill get it better one day#trust#I love drawing Tech he is so special to me eu eu eu#Lwk need to get on my preyduo grind I used to draw them constantly#FOR ANOTHER DAY THOUGH!
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I probably missed it, but what IS your favourite Dungeon Meshi ship?
WELL SINCE YOU ASKED, I have a chart already hdhshdh
1) Farcille is my number one!!! I wish I’ve drawn more of them, but most of my ideas for them are longggg and angsty and take a lot more mental bandwith. I’ve said before, I approach comics like I’m pitching an idea, and I mostly* agree with people’s depictions of them, so I have less to say.
*I say mostly because I cannot stand when people depict Falin as possessive, or disregard her characterization to give her generic dommy alpha monster traits hdhshdjs NOT THAT IT’S BAD it just doesn’t feel true to her character. I find myself bored by it.
I’m also put off by some of the folks I’ve seen in the farcille tags. They’re like,,, cliquey?? There was a point where people were dunking on mlm ships that came off borderline terfy, as if most of the dungeon meshi mlm shippers aren’t transmascs and lesbians?? I wasn’t a fan of the hostility like lmao it’s cartoons man
2) labru……… I love them….. mostly just post-canon. I really love Kabru (I think he’s my favorite character overall) and I loveeee the poetry of their individual character arcs and how well they play together. Guy who struggles to be honest, even with his own feelings vs Guy who doesn’t even consider being anything except honest. Kabru needing to carefully, painstakingly craft a mask tailored to each individual he interacts with, vs Laios, who is the only one to make all of Kabru’s masks fall apart. Also I think they’re kinda aro about it. They’re really good t4t flavored too.
The main appeal is post-canon. The King and his advisor. His right hand man. But it’s also the way like,,, Laios is DEFINITELY not the one in charge in their relationship dhshshsh (and this is what peeves me about how @myszkaa’s labru comic got memed to hell and back…. they don’t understand the later of comedy is from the KING asking for PRAISE from his SUBORDINATE!!!)
I will say!! This ship has a lot of folks with good takes on it, but it’s not immune to flanderization and boring yaoification. It’s popular enough that there’s enough of the good stuff.
3) chilshi!! I’ll admit this one has less canon validation hdhshsh but I think they have a lot of post-canon potential, and I think their difference in lifespans + the contrast in their lifestyle habits is really interesting and directly addresses a lot of the Dungeon Meshi’s core themes.
Part of the reason I like hanging out with chilshi shippers is cause most of em are chill, more nuanced in discussions, and are actually willing to draw fat & hairy people. And middle aged people.
special mention Kabumisu. I WISH I LIKED THIS ONE MORE!! I’ve tried,,,, I see the potential but I’m so picky about it and most of the content for it does absolutely nothing for me 🙈
Another thing is I HAVE to be able to like a pairing platonically to ship them romantically. Obviously shipping isn’t the only thing that matters to be about dungeon meshi.
I could say a lot more. Feel free to ask about my thoughts 👍
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I've done it again (acted like an lovestruck fool infront of my friends)
#miranda talking shit#Im so embarrassed i hate myself i wish i didnt react this way im making people uncomfortable im making things hard#Had a looooong talk with Fabian#6... Hours? Its 3.30 am now jajfnxjskskdkcjkd#It wad great i talked way too much unfortunately but alas. And at the end ... I had previously mentioned that evening that i#Find it better or easier to see people so i can know how they react. I hate being seen but seeing others i like and it helps me understand#Them. So the last 30-40 min he all of a sudden turned on his cam and i couldnt deal. I cannot deal#A sudden change like that when its 3am? I cant be normal. So i was stuttering and giggling and just being unable#To talk. And he just ... Sat there and was chill. And when that happens i get worse bc i realize how much embarrassed i am so yes#And he just ... 'you became so giggly' YES SO DID YOU 'yeah true'#I hate this part of myself bc usually ... Its my ... My crush is around and ya know im embarrassed bc of that so i act weird#But now it was like... Im still embarrassed but its not the same but im acting the same basically and i... Youre gonna think about it too#I react so fucking strongly to everything and its weird like please! Anyone who saw or heard me would assume i have the worst crush on him#In reality i got an crush on another guy and i just got so embarrassed bc im tired and yeah... Doesnt help he is the calmest calm guy to#Ever calm. I know for a fact i react worse when i can see others arent bothered... Im scared... Fellas im scared ... I have fucked up#Hes going to be weirded out now ... I am screaming help#Its bad enough i have acted this way around people i genuinely have a crush on... At least i.. Mean if they can tell i mean i am at least#Honest. I understand people in my past who have bullied me in these situations it must be hilarious#Having a chick go from yeah ok we can talk and joke and be alright to... I-i-i-i ca-cannot ta...t-t-t-talk#I wish i could say i was faking it too. No I literally stop myself many times and try to start over but my voice just shakes and#My brain is like 'haha... Mushy mushy what do we say ' end me#Fabian#'vad fnissing du blev nu' JA DET BLEV DU MED 'jo det är sant'
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teddy bear
summary: you discover your best friend's dirty little secret but after the initial anger passes, you are excited... pairing: haechan x reader genre: smut, best friends to lovers warnings: non-consensual filming/hidden camera, perv!haechan (wbk), but ALSO perv!reader, allusions to masturbation, lowkey dubcon but not rlly, face-sitting, eating out, blowjob, unprotected piv sex, boob touching, switch!haechan, inexperienced!reader, pet names, oh yeah and kissing (ew) author's note: idk what this is but 🎵 i've been a nasty guuuurl, nasty, is somebody gonna match my 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 🎵 word count: 2k
If there is one person in this universe you’d trust with your life, that person would be Haechan. He’s always been there for you, through the highs and lows of your life. So, when you discover how he’d betrayed you, you feel like your world comes crashing down on you with all of its weight and injustice.
You accidentally find something you’d never expected would happen to you. A hidden camera in the teddy bear Haechan had gifted you a year ago. You can’t believe it. You don’t perceive yourself as a particularly interesting person. You don’t do much in your room. Except…
The idea that Haechan had seen you in your most private, vulnerable moments sends chills down your spine. You feel mortified, embarrassed but most of all, angry. How could he do this to you? How could he film you in secret without your permission? How could he betray your trust like that? And worst of all, how could a part of you get excited about that?
You invite your best friend Haechan over on a whim. With the initial plan to confront him, maybe threaten him with this newfound knowledge a little, things take an unexpected turn.
“Hey, darling, how have you been?” Haechan asks as he enters your apartment.
“Oh, don’t you ‘darling’ me, you creep!” you immediately accuse him.
“What did I do?” he tries to play it dumb but you can see it in his eyes that he knows exactly what crime he’s guilty of.
“I found the camera…inside the teddy bear,” you get straight to the point, dragging him by the hand to your room and showing him the evidence.
Maybe this is unwise. Maybe a sane person would go to the police rightaway. Maybe you should file a restraining order. But the thought of living without Haechan feels more painful than the thought he’d done something so sick. Maybe you’re just as sick in the head.
“So, you found it,” he states the obvious.
“Aren’t you gonna say anything to defend yourself? Like, maybe it came like that and you didn’t know it had a camera,” you attempt to find a logical explanation.
“Oh, I knew, alright,” Haechan confesses.
You punch his arm lightly, not meaning to actually hurt him, but he’s taken aback nonetheless.
“How could you do this to me? I trusted you with my life,” you cry out, your eyes welling up with tears.
“I promise no one else has seen the footage. I would never show it to anyone.”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” you sniffle. “You saw me…naked. No, scratch that, you saw me touching myself, saw me crying all alone, saw me at my most pathetic.”
“There was never anything pathetic about you, precious. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen and I’m so sorry I made. I just…admire you so much that I did something wrong. I know it’s unhealthy that I want to look at you all the time but I couldn’t help it. I’d do anything to make you forgive me,” Haechan promises.
“Anything?” you ask, your eyebrow raising in interest, a sinful idea already forming in your head.
“You name it. If you wanna report me to the police, go for it, as long as you forgive me one day.”
“I’m not gonna report you,” you say calmly. “But I do want a favour.”
“Whatever you wish, sweetheart,” Haechan blinks at you with so much affection and dedication you know you’re making the right choice.
“You’ve probably seen me…well, struggling to reach an orgasm,” you murmur shyly. “When I feel it coming, my fingers get so tired and I just…stop in the middle of nowhere. I was wondering if you can help me with that?”
You phrase it as a question but it’s actually a demand. If Haechan wants your forgiveness so badly, he’s gonna have to earn it.
“Sit on my face,” he offers.
“Huh?”
“Go on, then. I’ll help you out, just relax and let me take care of you.”
Fuck, his words have such an immediate effect on you that you rush to take off your shorts and comfortable panties you wear at home and you don’t have the time to feel self-conscious.
Haechan seems more eager than you and pulls you closer than ever. As you make yourself comfortable on top of him, he quickly dives in, licking your pussy with so much enthusiasm that you already know he’s gonna make you feel so good. You grab his hair a bit harshly and he moans against your folds, the sound sending vibrations to your core. Arching your back, you search the long-awaited release as Haechan digs his nails into your thighs, holding onto you for support. His tongue fucks into you from below in ways you didn’t think possible. You cry out his name unabashedly as you come all over his too pretty for this world face.
You collapse backwards, head falling near his legs. As the haze of your orgasm begins to wear off, you notice Haechan’s hard cock straining against the confines of his jeans. Another idea has already been planted in your brain.
“Am I forgiven yet?” Haechan wonders with an adorable pout. You want to kiss him stupid but decide to torture him a little longer.
“Not yet,” you chuckle. “But it’s a good start. Now, I want you to teach me how to suck a cock.”
His pained expression tells you volumes.
“W-why?” he stutters.
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m not very experienced and I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself in front of guys. So, show me the right way.”
Haechan gulps anxiously. Is he jealous of these hypothetical future guys. You don’t tell him that he is the only guy you want to touch, that would give his ego an unnecessary boost. And you don’t want that. You want him to think that him being forgiven is dependent on whether he does as you wish.
“Okay. Well, to be honest, most guys just prefer fucking a girl’s mouth, or so I’ve heard. So, you wouldn’t have to do much. But I can still show you the basics.”
You nod eagerly and unbutton his jeans. Haechan gently guides you to his cock.
“Lick the tip. You don’t have to fit it all in your mouth.”
You follow his instructions excitedly and envelop your lips around his length. It’s not super long but its thickness poses a delicious challenge. Your mouth can’t possibly widen any further so you also start touching him with your small hands.
“That’s good, you’re doing so well for me,” Haechan praises you and his words make you even more enthusiastic. Your eyes teary and your throat hurting but he strokes your hair so sweetly and you must be fucked up because you don’t want this to end.
Licking and groping to the best of your abilities, his release comes sooner than expected. Are you really that good or is he just whipped for you? You try to swallow his cum but there is so much of it that as soon as your lips leave his cock so you can breathe properly, his cum comes spilling down your chest.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” Haechan apologizes for making a mess.
You shake your head and can’t resist the temptation any longer so you crash your mouth against his in a sick, feverish kiss. He appears taken aback but kisses you back with just as much passion, if not more. He buries his hand in your hair, tilting your head back, practically fucking your face with his own. He bites your lips and touches your cheek with his other hand, as you completely melt for him.
“You like this?” Haechan chuckles in disbelief once he breaks the kiss. “You like being kissed by your best friend who’s been getting off on footage of you in secret?”
“Does that make me a weirdo?” you grin wickedly.
“Oh, definitely. But I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Haechan says.
“I want you to fuck me,” you blurt out suddenly, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“Are you sure?” his eyes widen in shock.
“Please?”
“Your wish is my command, princess,” Haechan responds. “Do you want to be on top?”
“I don’t know, whatever works best for you,” you really don’t care about the positions, you just need this freak inside of you. Okay, you realize you’re just as freaky but oh well.
“Wanna try riding me and if you get tired, I’ll take over?” Haechan suggests softly.
“Alright, let’s try that,” you agree quickly and take your top off.
“Oh,” Haechan licks his dry lips in surprise.
“What?”
“You’re not wearing a bra,” he states the obvious.
“So? I’m at my own home, it feels more comfortable that way.”
“I know but…you asked me over knowing that I’ve put a camera in that bear and you’re not wearing-”
“Haechan, do me another favour and stop overthinking, okay?”
He nods again, still staring at your boobs.
“Do you want to touch them?” you laugh because his face looks priceless.
“May I?” Haechan asks politely. God, he’s so cute you want to eat him up. He’s also the most perverted guy you’ve ever met. So basically perfect for you.
“Yes, do whatever you want, I trust you,” you admit even though it is probably foolish. But it is true.
Haechan envelops his hands around your tits as you climb on top of him, letting his cock slide in. You’re so wet for him it happens so smoothly, as if you were meant to fit in together. He plays with your nipples gently and you ride him, moving your hips up and down.
“You can be more rough, I’m not gonna break,” you tell him honestly.
Haechan isn’t sure exactly what you mean by that but tries his best to not disappoint you. He pinches your nipples, squeezing your boobs a little more harshly and eliciting sweet moans out of you. Then, he bucks his hips upwards to meet your wetness, fucking into you from below with impressive speed and eagerness. You are beginning to grow tired, chasing an orgasm that feels so close, yet out of reach.
“Please, take over, I don’t think I can do this,” you pout pitifully.
“Sure, angel,” Haechan flips you over so that you are now lying on your back and fucks you hard and sweet.
“Make me come, Haechan, please, please, please,” you beg him desperately.
“Let go for me, baby, that’s it,” he encourages you and who are you to argue with him?
Your orgasm hits you so suddenly and you feel yourself babbling nonsense. Soon after, he releases his seed inside or you, making you lose your mind even further. You feel so deliciously full you wish you could stay trapped in this moment forever.
Haechan slides out of you and brings you a bottle of water. You greedily accept it and after your thirst is satiated, give the rest to him. He drinks a bit and then leaves it on the bed. You look at him without saying anything and he does the same for a while. Haechan strokes your hair and you lean into his comforting touch. The silence is in no way uncomfortable but you are still plagued by thoughts. What’s next? Pure friendship is out of the question. You like him too much to entertain the thought of him with someone else. But does he feel the same?
“I don’t want to suck other guys’ cocks. In case it wasn’t obvious,” you admit without thinking of the consequences. “Do you…want to sleep with other people?”
Haechan shakes his head.
“Your ten personalities provide plenty of entertainment for me,” he jokes.
You shove him lightly, unable to contain your giggles. He grabs your wrists and kisses them fondly.
“You’re such a brat,” you say but it’s a compliment.
“Alexa play Charli XCX’s new album” Haechan shrugs.
“I sometimes wish I could be a brat, too,” you sigh wistfully.
“You? No way, you’re my good girl,” he squeezes your cheeks dotingly.
“Challenge accepted,” you give him a wink.
“Fine, fine, I’ll try my best to teach you my brattish ways,” he vows generously.
“It’s a date,” you clap your hands with unrestrained excitement.
“So…am I forgiven?” Haechan asks one last time.
You laugh and wrap your arms around him in a hug.
“On one condition,” you whisper in his ear with a smirk. “You take the teddy bear to your place. It’s my turn to look at you whenever I like.”
The End
#nct#haechan#nct smut#haechan smut#nct dream smut#lee donghyuck smut#nct 127 smut#haechan x reader#nct hard thoughts#nct hard hours#haechan hard thoughts#haechan hard hours#nct imagines#haechan imagines#writing
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omg have you seen the new criminal minds season??? i just wanted to request a
grey haired!emily prentiss x reader, based on like the newer seasons, it could be fluffy or smut
Dirty Minded - Emily Prentiss x Fem!Reader
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Summary: Dirty minds lead to dirty activities.
Warnings: praise, age gap, fingering (emily!receiving), blindfolds, oral sex (r!receiving), feathers, orgasm delay, pet names, not proofread..
Word Count: 2k
Taglist: @celasteria @shslbunnylover @bellatrixsbrat @maybe-a-humanbean
© Do not copy, repost, or modify any of my works.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
"Time to get wet, baby," your lover said. You took hold of her outstretched hand, and slipped into the shower with her.
Your skin instantly soothes as you stand underneath the shower head that cascaded your body with hot, steamy water. You instantly relaxed with a quiet hum.
A shiver erupted in your body when Emily's slightly colder hand touched the bare skin above the upper swell of your breast.
"Now how exactly does a beautiful woman with a mind as filthy as yours ever get clean?" You chuckle at her wandering hands.
"No idea," she lied. "Maybe you could help me with that?" She tilted her head to the side as she smirked down at you.
You gasped when a hand slid between your thighs and cupped your pussy.
"But if not," she retreated her hand as fast as she put it there. "I could always just help myself," she shrugged, placing that same hand over her large breast.
You kiss her ferociously, pulling her tightly against your wet body. Emily chuckled into the kiss at your sudden eagerness. The older woman pushed you against the wall, sending a chill down your spine at the sudden coolness.
"Em..." you mumbled as her lips left yours to kiss along your jawline and nibble sweetly at your ear.
"I do need to get clean though," she whispers, before pulling away and wiggling her lavender scented body wash in your face.
"Let me wash you," you eagerly grabbed the body wash from her, with a giddy smile spread across your face.
"As you wish, Princess."
You rubbed your hands together, before lathering the soap onto Emily's milky white skin. Hands roamed over her lustrous hips, but your eyes still landed on her hair.
It was a darker grey from the wetness, and God did it look good on her. It was one of the things she was most insecure about, but your constant love and affection, all the praising words and hair playing was enough to win her over.
Your hands wrapped around her waist, pulling her flush to your own body, and down to grab firmly at her generously built ass.
"How's this?" you asked, adoring the way her cheeks grew crimson. Whether it was from the heat or your ministrations, she looked beautiful.
"It's a good start, but..." she trailed off, biting her lower lip. Her hands find home across your chest, holding each breast with a firm grip. "If this is the type of shower we're having, you need to go lower," she stated with a smirk.
Your hands moved across her curves easily as you slickly made your way to her inner thighs. Fingers trailed lightly across the wet skin before drawing featherlight circles around her clit.
"So demanding..." you teased.
"You know you like it." Emily pressed her lips against yours, the first being gentle and light, yet she kept coming back for more. Each kiss grew rougher and sloppier as you remained playing with her.
She breathes a deep moan into your mouth as your hand easily slides around her button, adding pressure to her bundle of nerves as her tongue fights with yours for dominance.
She twines one leg around you, giving you better access and pulling you closer. The water was cascading heavily down your back, and you felt as if it was soaking into your skin from the heat of her body pressed tightly against yours.
"I'm...so...close," she announced between sloppy, wet, kisses.
Your digits only moved faster, allowing the older woman to feel how badly you wanted her to come undone. Her breathing was heavy as her forehead leaned against yours to catch some much needed air.
"Don't stop, baby..." she whispered. Emily was never one to beg, but when it came to intimate moments like this, she was too focused on her upcoming orgasm to care.
With one last circle of your fingers, Emily came with shaky legs. Her hands held a death grip onto your wet skin, holding herself upright as her legs become wobbly.
She was panting heavily, and your eyes couldn't help but adore the way her silver hair clung to her wet chest, stopping just at the upper-swell of her large breasts.
"I need you so bad.." she finally admitted after catching her breath, fingers kneading at your waist.
"Then take me," you bit your lip, before giving her one last peck onto her swollen lips.
Emily reached behind you to turn the water off, your eyes knitting in confusion. You had only assumed she would take you here, but your grey-haired lover had other plans.
She was slower to get out of the shower, ensuring her legs wouldn't give out on her as she wrapped herself up in a towel.
"I never said where or how I would take you, baby," she smirked devilishly. She held her hand out for you, which you happily took as you both eagerly dried yourselves off.
Clothes were long forgotten on the tile floors as Emily led you to your shared bedroom, only to roughly push you down onto the mattress, but not hard enough to hurt you.
You gasped at her sudden boldness, holding yourself up on your elbows as you watched her every move.
Your heart thumped in your chest as you watched her saunter over to the closet. The same closet that held all of the older woman's toys. Toys that she liked to use not only on herself, but mainly on you.
Your toes wiggled as you waited in anticipation, both excitement and lust coursing through your veins. You can hear rustling in the other room and you were eager to know why.
When Emily emerges, she has her hands held behind her back, hiding whatever it is she took from the closet.
"Are you ready for me, Princess?" She asked, sauntering towards you with an extra sway in hips.
"You know I'm always ready for you, Em."
Your cheeks flushed when she brought her hands from behind her back. One by one you saw a blindfold in one hand and a very large feather clutched in the other.
"Good," she said plainly. "Because now it's my turn to have fun with you." Emily made her way to the bed, easily straddling you, setting the feather down briefly to hold the blindfold in front of your face.
She only stopped her movements to await your consent, and with the eager nod of your head, her smirk grew wider as she pulled the silk blindfold over your eyes.
Emily firmly pushed you down by your chest, your back fully pushing against the mattress as you shivered in anticipation while you waited.
And waited.
"Em—" you gasped at the first delicate touch of the feather. With your eyesight gone, your other senses grew stronger.
You have no sight, quiet moans filled the room, and the touch of the feather gliding down your chest was electrifying.
"You like this, baby? I know it's been a while since we've played with either of these..." Her voice was deep, hungry, and you could only imagine how penetrating her gaze was on your quivering body.
"Ahh— yes! It's so good.." you wiggled your body from the ticklish touch of the feather.
You could just picture Emily above you. Naked. Partially wet. Grey hair framing her face as it slowly dried around her beautifully sculpted face.
You whined when the feather suddenly disappeared from your skin, only to be taken by warm lips. Her mouth followed the same trail the feather did.
You sucked in a sharp breath as her lips dipped lower...and lower..until finally she reached where you needed her most. Her tongue flicked over your sensitive clit, moving expertly in slow, languid circles.
You writhed, Emily having to hold you down by your thighs to keep you still as her mouth worked wonders on your cunt.
Your moans filled the room, occasionally being mixed with small hums from your lover as she devoured your pussy.
But as you felt yourself getting close, Emily suddenly pulled away, leaving you naked, panting, and whining from the loss of contact as you felt your release fade away.
"Em, please..." you whined, bucking your hips in hopes of her coming back.
"I can't let you come that quickly." She placed a sensual kiss on your thigh. "I don't want this to end just yet..."
"Em..." you groaned, trying, and failing, to rub your thighs together.
"Tell me what you want, then."
Unable to stand not being able to see the gorgeous being between your legs, you rip the blindfold from your face.
"I want you to eat my pussy while I can see your beautiful face and run my fingers through your hair. God, your hair drives me crazy," you sheepishly admitted.
"Does it now?" She teased your cunt once more with her thumb.
"Em— no more teasing!" You rested yourself back onto your elbows to get a better view of her. "Finish what you started, I can't wait anymore."
Emily let out a low chuckle at your stern behavior and impatience. Your eyes met hers, wide and filled with lust as she spread your legs farther to dive back into your pussy.
Fingers curled into slowly drying grey locks, holding the woman close by the back of her head as her tongue danced across your folds before she began sucking on your bundle of nerves once again.
Emily can feel you instantly quiver as your free hand tangled into the sheets while she expertly ate your pussy as if she was starving.
"Don't stop.." you begged, not tearing your gaze away from your lover who was gazing right back at you through her lashes.
As her mouth moved over your cunt, you caught sight of her hand leaving one of your thighs to dip between her own legs. Fingers slowly moved at her entrance before picking up speed.
Her moans soon mixed with yours. Emily's back arched ever so slightly, raising her ass further into the air and her face deeper between your thighs.
"Yes, Em, just like that— I'm so close!" You were a panting mess as you chased your release. And Emily was racing just behind you.
Your moans synchronized, both of you getting lost in the pleasure, and in the moment, everything seemed to fade away. The outside world was nonexistent. All you knew was pleasure.
With one last flick with her tongue and a hard suck to your clit, you came undone, thighs closing the gap between Emily's head to keep her in place as you rode out your high.
"Fuck, Em!" Your back arched off the bed as she lapped at your hole, letting out a series of moans of her own as she reached her own climax.
When Emily finally pulled back, a familiar smirk spread across her face as she licked her lips. You hummed as you admired your lover, messy grey hair, flushed milky skin, dilated pupils, and a very wet chin.
"Christ, come here," you beckoned her up by holding your hand out to her.
Emily nearly pounced on you, immediately straddling your hips. Her hands found yours, enveloping them in a tight hold with her fingers interlacing yours. Lips crashed in a much needed kiss, and a deep moan forcing its way into Emily's mouth as you tasted yourself along her dominant tongue.
"We're going to need to take an actual shower, baby," she said after breaking the kiss to collapse onto the bed next to you.
Her arms immediately wrapped around you, and you couldn't help but hum contently. She pulled you close, holding you possessively while your fingers immediately went to play with her silvery hair.
"I don't think I'm done with you just yet," you smirked at your lover with a newfound fire in your eyes.
"Oh?" she lifted a high brow. "What did you have in mind?" Emily asked, cheekily lowering her hand to firmly grasp your ass.
"Well...." you drew out, slowly removing your fingers from her hair to slide down her body to wrap your hand around a large tit. "It's easier if I just show you..."
You lean forward to kiss Emily fiercely and passionately on the mouth, teeth grazing over her plump bottom lip before biting down.
Her moans of pleasure soon filled the room, echoing off the walls long into the night as you showed her exactly what you had planned to do to her.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
general masterlist | paget masterlist | taglist
#emily prentiss#emily prentiss x y/n#emily prentiss x female reader#emily prentiss x you#emily prentiss x reader#criminal minds#criminal minds evolution#fanfic#smut#lesbiansmut#wlw smut#oneshot#lesbian#lesbianism#wlw post
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Decent Man Pt.1
The second part
Pairing: Cregan Stark/fem!reader
Author's Note: I've decided to split this into 2 parts just to give myself a chance to work on the ending but I was eager to get something written. This is the first fanfiction I've wrote, or at least posted on this account so I hope it's not too bad.
Summary: You're newly wed to Lord Stark after having only been courted for barely a month. Although the anxieties of having to perform as a 'royal' wife start to eat at you, Cregan proves to be a decent husband.
You must have done it, how else would you be alone in his chambers. Blocking out all the noise and going through the motions would only get you so far. You couldn’t even remember the vows. Lord Stark had arranged for there to be no bedding ceremony, perhaps an act of mercy. You’ve heard some lords complain they simply want their lady wives all to themselves, untouched and unspoiled. You were neither. You weren’t sure if your Lord husband was either.
You hadn’t learned much about him during your courting, not that it lasted long. Your father practically jumped at the opportunity for a stronger alliance to the most powerful house in the North. It must have appeased Lord Stark as well, seeing how quickly he’d agreed to the marriage, it had barely taken place a fortnight after you’d met. Now though, you were in his room, none to accompany you but your ladies in waiting. A few had come with you from your own keep, or rather your fathers. And one or two had been appointed to you since coming to Winterfell to stay. You could hardly form the words to tell them you could undress yourself. Maybe it was the cloak weighing you down, making it harder to breath the harsh winter air. You let it slip off your shoulders and yet you still feel heavy, a weight in your chest and a hard lump in your throat.
Hearing the thick wooden door swing open and shut after heavy footfalls and quick scurrying of feet made the pit in your stomach sink even lower. “Are you well?” He asked, definitely due to your silent stewing. The whole night you’ve been lost in your own thoughts.
“Yes, I am well, thank you.” You force a courteous smile to you face, although more brief and sour than you’d intended. You figure you’ll have to do a lot more of that in the coming years. “You do not look well.” Your not sure he says so in a demeaning way, more so that he’s seen through your flimsy facade. Or maybe he’s focused on the way your hands desperately seek purchase on your gown as your eyes start to brim with tears. You can’t control it when they start to spill.
“There is no need for us to,” He gestures between you with a sigh, trying to supplement actions for words. “Consummate the marriage tonight, if you do not wish it.” He tries to search your eyes for any sort of answer but you avoid his gaze. “Did you hear-”
“Let’s just get it over with.” You say, voice low and wavering with all it’s strength to keep it from cracking. Another stray tear falls down your cheek as you reach behind yourself for the laces of your gown but two large hands hold your arms still.
“You truly think so little of me? That I would– Like I said, there is no need to consummate the marriage tonight.” He brings your arms out from behind your back, holding your chilled hands in his. His fingers and palms are calloused, yet his grip gentle. “I barely had a chance to court you before we wed, perhaps we might come to know each other before; that.” Your eyes flicker down to where his hands encompass yours, and he quickly recedes after catching on but strangely, you find yourself missing his warmth.
As your eyes find his once more he continues. “I shall have a few ladies in your service prepare a chamber for you. I know you’ve not had space for your things but I assure you they’ve been taken care of. In the mean time though you’ll need to take your rest here.” He turns to make for the door and surprisingly a part of you longs for him to stay. The brief bit of kindness he’s shown to you is more than you can say for those that attended your wedding. Your father truly had not exaggerated the icy attitude of those in the North. Lord Stark however, to see his wintry exterior slowly melt away has made it almost impossible to detest him. “I will see you on the morrow, my lady.” He opens the door and a cold breeze comes over you, yet you don’t shiver, the cold only emboldens you. “Thank you, Lord Stark, for your kindness.” your voice is somewhat steady now, no longer fighting an imminent sob. He nods at your words, “Cregan will do just fine, my lady.” You’re alone now and the chill is gone. All the warmth radiating from the hearth is slowly becoming too much to bear even as it smolders to embers. The absence of your Lord husband leaves you feeling alone now, more than you’ve ever been.
#house of the dragon#reader insert#cregan stark#cregan x reader#cregan stark x reader#cregan stark x you#cregan stark/reader#cregan stark/you
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ᡣ𐭩 winter is cold in tokyo — itoshi rin
contains: reader gender isn’t mentioned but you have a brother, meet cute, not proof read
a/n: I kind of want to continue this into a pt 2 but knowing myself it probably won’t happen soz
You first met Rin at your older brother Hiro’s football game.
Your parents had dragged you along despite your protests that it was too cold to be sitting outside.
In the car, your mom argued, “You need to support your brother.”
“You’ll regret not watching me when I grow up to be a super-famous football player,” Hiro added, sticking his tongue out from the front seat of the family SUV.
“As if you’ll ever be good,” you mumbled under your breath, burying your face in your thick winter scarf.
The moment your mom parked the car, Hiro bolted out to join his team on the field. Your mom sighed, clearly not surprised, before turning to help you out.
“I need to talk to the other moms about the end-of-season party. Stay nearby,” she said, though her words barely registered as you trudged behind her, more focused on keeping warm than on following directions.
Your mom disappeared into the crowd of chatting parents. Despite her instructions, you wandered near the field where Hiro was already running drills with his teammates. He was shouting and laughing as if the cold didn’t bother him at all.
Typical Hiro.
You settled in a spot between the field and the parents, a place where your mother could still see you but far enough away that you didn’t have to listen to arguments over whose house the party should be at.
The ground was cold underneath your thighs—not cold enough to make you stand, though. You picked at a patch of half-frozen grass for a minute before the chill started to creep into your toes through your boots, making you regret every life decision that led you to this place.
You hugged your scarf tighter around your face, determined to get through this dumb soccer game by sheer force of will—or by sulking through most of it.
Your eyes flickered between Hiro, laughing with his teammates on the field, and your mom, chatting with the other parents, a bright smile on her face.
She leaned in closer to one of them, nodding as if they’d just come to an agreement on whose house would host.
It seemed as if everyone around you belonged somewhere. They were connected and warm.
You shifted around on the ground, trying to get comfortable as the cold bit through your layers. The laughter and voices blurred into the distance; none of the noise was meant for you.
Even the air began to feel sharper, like it stung more because no one was distracting you from it. It was as if the air itself was mocking you.
Your gaze drifted back to the field. Hiro was grinning without a care in the world. You had always envied how effortless it was for Hiro to find people, to always belong, for others to want him around.
A gust of wind sent shivers down your spine, and you curled up into yourself, wishing you could disappear into the scarf around your neck.
It made you wonder if anyone noticed you sitting there, alone. Would anyone notice if you got up to use the bathroom? You probably could just leave, and no one would care.
“Can I sit here?” a voice interrupted your thoughts, soft but kind.
You blinked and looked up. A boy around your age stood a few feet away, his cheeks pink from the cold. His long underlashes stood out on his round face, and he was wearing a too-big hoodie under his coat. In his hands was a thermos, steam curling from the lid.
“Sure,” you muttered before scooting over. You didn’t have a reason to say no.
“Thank you,” he said, giving you a small smile before sitting beside you. He unscrewed the lid of the thermos, the rich scent of hot chocolate wafting out. It made you jealous—you wished you’d asked your mom for hot chocolate before leaving.
“Is your brother playing?” you asked.
“Mhm! He’s the redhead!” He pointed toward the field. You followed his finger to a red-haired player who looked exactly like him—underlashes and all.
You recognized the older boy as Itoshi Sae. Hiro always complained about how Sae acted all high and mighty because he was a good player, but you could always tell Hiro admired Sae’s skill.
“My brother is the one with a bad haircut. He says he’s gonna go pro, but I won’t buy it.” You stuck your tongue out at the thought of Hiro going pro. “Oh! What’s your name?”
“Rin.” He unscrewed the lid of his thermos and took a small sip. “Sae says he’s gonna go pro, and I believe him. Sae is the best football player ever!”
“Are you sure?” you asked. “They got beat by another team a few weeks ago.”
“Sae still got the most goals on his team. Once he joins a better club than this one, he’s gonna get even better.”
You furrowed your brow at the slight insult toward Hiro. “What makes you say he won’t suck on another team?”
Rin blinked at you, his expression shifting to one of quiet confidence. “Because Sae doesn’t lose. He plays to be the best, not just to win. And when he’s on the field, it’s like he dominates the area.” Awe shone through his voice. “Sae is different.”
“That’s kind of intense.” You stared at him for a moment, surprised by how sure he sounded.
Rin shrugged and took a longer sip from his thermos. “That’s just Sae. He’s not the type to care about what anyone thinks as long as he’s getting better.”
Rin glanced at the field. You followed his gaze again and watched as Sae effortlessly weaved through a drill. Even from a decent distance, you could see how differently Sae moved compared to his teammates. Every step he took seemed deliberate and precise.
Hiro, on the other hand, was laughing on the ground with another teammate. You rolled your eyes.
“My brother is a clown. I don’t think he’s serious about football because he’s never been serious about anything in his entire life.”
Rin tilted his head at your words. “He probably plays because he loves it. He doesn’t have anything to prove.”
You frowned; his words lingered in the air between you. He was probably right, though. Hiro always talked big, but there wasn’t much effort to give him credit for. Still, you weren’t about to let Rin off the hook for mildly insulting your brother, even if Hiro sometimes needed humbling.
“Well then, if Sae is so amazing, Hiro just needs to beat him one day.” You said it half-jokingly.
Rin frowned. “Good luck with that. Sae doesn’t lose to anyone.”
“Oh, really?” You raised a brow at his confidence. “Everyone loses eventually. You might even beat him one day if you play.”
“I don’t want to beat Sae,” Rin said with a small smile. “I want to play beside him and be the best after him.”
His smile quickly vanished as he looked back at you with a small frown. “Sae definitely won’t lose. Especially not to your brother.”
Rin shook his head, looking at you like you just didn’t get it—and maybe you didn’t.
You sighed. “Oh well. What do I know? I’m only here because my mom forced me to be.”
“Figures. You don’t look like you want to be here.”
“Wow, thanks,” you deadpanned, though you couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips.
Rin looked over at you. The expression on his face was unreadable. “You just look like you’d rather be anywhere else than here.”
You glanced at the field again, watching the players laugh and shout, Hiro the loudest. “Yeah, well… I kind of would.” You sighed into your scarf. “What about you?” you asked, mostly out of politeness. You already know the answer.
Rin didn’t say anything for a moment, but when you looked back at him, he was smiling—small and quiet. “It’s not too bad here.”
You weren’t entirely sure if he meant watching the game or sitting next to you, but for some reason, his words made the cold feel just a little less biting and for the first time that day, you felt a little less miserable.
written by koudi
#꩜.ᐟ koudi writes#itoshi rin x reader#rin itoshi x reader#blue lock x reader#blue lock#blue lock x you#bllk x reader#bllk x you#bllk fluff
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what the bsd charcters would get at the gas station (as a gas station employee)
a/n: i wrote this while bored at work a few months ago in my notes app, and thought it would be funny to share. nikolai's is def my favorite. enjoy.
dazai - just black coffee like a few times a day. he would talk to the clerks and is friendly to the point where he gets free coffees. flirts with the young women working but we cant tell if he is actually or not because he’s just hard to read. i can’t tell if he smokes or not but if he did he would get marlboro black 100’s.
atsushi - white cherry gatorade and some chips. very average customer. might eventually become friendly with the workers but hes a bit shy, and is surprised when the workers ask him how he’s doing.
kyoka - snack cakes. doesnt talk at all other than saying thank you. sometimes comes in with atsushi.
kunikida - coffee as well. very respectful and if he likes it will become a regular and add it to his schedule. everyone likes him. will occasionally rant about a coworker that annoys the fuck out of him (hm i wonder who).
ranpo - a fuck ton of candy and soda. like takes several trips back and fourth with handfuls of random ass snacks. he’s annoying as fuck about it too.
akutagawa - water. probably goes to the self checkout too, just does not wanna talk to anyone.
chuuya - premium gas and occasionally cigarettes. he’d get some odd type too like winstons or very specific marlboros. he doesn’t talk much unless the worker talks to him. but me and my younger female coworkers would definitely gush over him when he first starts coming.
hirotsu - he would get some old people shit like tourneys or parliaments and say “in a box”. but is patient when the workers take a second to look for them because literally no one gets them.
oda - marlboro black 100’s (which would have inspired dazai's choice). doesn’t talk much.
ango - water and a small snack like a doughnut or peanuts.
tachihara - mountain dew voltage. very chill and talks to the workers. if he finds anyone attractive would lowkey flirt.
tecchou - he would find some type of snack that no one knew we even had. like the byson meat sticks that are definitely expired.
teruko - look i love her but i KNOW this bitch door dashes shit, and it drives us nuts because its always when we’re busy.
fukuchi - he gets beer and would pay with like a 50 dollar bill. my friend i work with would make an inside joke about him being our sugar daddy.
nikolai - (this is something an actual person has done) walks in , says hi and takes an entire fucking tray of lighters before walking out.
fyodor - calls the store and scams the worker for hundreds of dollars.
edit: should i tell more stories about working at a gas station? because i have a lot. i also wish i could have put in the time i was serenaded by a customer when i was by myself. but idk who would do that. maybe dazai??
#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#dazai#atsushi#kyoka izumi#kunikida#ranpo#chuuya x reader#dazai osamu x reader#bsd x reader#dazai x reader#osamu dazai x reader#ranpo x reader#bsd kunikida#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#bungou stray dogs x reader#nikolai x reader#nikolai#bsd nikolai#bsd fyodor#fyodor#fyodor x reader
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Unpaid Balance
Pairing: Debt collector!Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
Words: 5k
Warnings: 18+, dark nature, the mob, Spencer is evil in a weirdly sexual way, hair yanking, maybe it counts a little as waterboarding reader's head is submerged in water for a second or two, fingering, kissing? Dom/sub dynamic, Sex is there but not described that well, Teasing, Hunter x prey dynamic, fear, fainting.
I think that's it but let me know if I missed something.
A/N: I'M BACK BITCHES!!!! I made myself so feral writing this, what the fuck. Also, Rossi makes an apperance :)
"You can't hide from me forever! There's nowhere to run." His voice echoed through the nearly empty warehouse, a chilling reminder of the footsteps that drew closer with every passing second. You regretted sneaking in here, realizing too late that hiding from him was the worst decision you could have made. His taunting voice carried a sinister edge, and you could almost picture the smirk tugging at his lips. All of this because you answered your phone this morning. You kicked yourself mentally for being so stupid, you knew better, but now wasn’t the time for that. You needed to find a way out of here.
It all started this morning. You knew time was running out. The stack of letters piling up in the mail painted a grim picture, one you desperately wished you could escape. The bank had sold your debt weeks ago to the most notorious collectors in the city, and how you'd managed to stay off their radar for this long was a mystery. But the moment your phone rang, dread settled in your stomach—you knew you’d messed up royally when you mindlessly answered the call.
"Ah, Miss (L/N), I'm glad to reach you finally." His voice was smooth, almost soothing, the kind of voice you could listen to for hours if the circumstances differed. But this wasn't a podcast, and Spencer Reid was far from a comforting presence. There was an unsettling familiarity in his tone, despite never having met him before. You knew exactly who he was and that was the problem.
"Well, If that's how you'd like to play-" You quickly cut off the call, knowing fully well that you were in deep trouble now. If only the bank had sold your files to anyone else, you would've been able to survive, but this was truly the worst outcome you could think of. Not even five minutes passed by before the buzzer rang. Panic surged through you, your heart racing faster than you thought possible. You felt sick, your vision blurring as his words echoed in your mind. It had to be him at the door.
With no time to waste, you bolted for the fire escape, scrambling down and out onto the street. You ran, pushing yourself to move faster, not daring to look back. But curiosity got the better of you. You glanced over your shoulder and there he was—Spencer, standing calmly at the end of the street, hands in his pockets, his black suit making him look even more imposing. He was too calm, given your desperate flight. He gave you a slight nod before getting into his car as if this were all just a game to him. Panic surged again, and you kept running, taking the first turn you saw, desperately trying to shake him off your tail.
Somehow the streets seemed empty, almost too empty, something was wrong and you knew it. Your steps echoed through the streets as you made your way further and further away from him, or so you hoped. Despite the sun brightly lighting up the sky, each step you took seemed to guide you further and further into darkness.
The sound of a car door slamming yanked your attention, and you knew instantly that Spencer was close. His disapproving tutting echoed down the street, a harsh reminder of your failed escape. Spinning around, you spotted his towering shadow cast ominously against the building at the next street corner. Without a second thought, you darted back the way you came, barely dodging an oncoming car. There was no time to heed the rules of the road—stopping could mean getting caught, and you weren't about to lose everything without a fight. Determination surged through you as you sprinted down the street, your heart pounding with every step.
Somehow, you found yourself in a narrow alley with no way out except to retrace your steps. Just when you thought you were done for, the sound of footsteps drew closer again. As if answering a desperate prayer, you spotted a tiny opening in the wall, partially obscured by wooden planks. It looked like a tight squeeze, but it was your only chance. You dashed toward the gap and threw yourself behind a dumpster, clawing your way through the narrow space. The rough edges of the broken planks scratched at your arms, sending stinging pain through your skin. You gave yourself a quick once-over, checking for any serious injuries, before realizing that you’d only traded one danger for another. You had squeezed into one of the abandoned warehouses near the docks, and now you were even more trapped.
You were far from home, no familiarity whatsoever in these corners of the city. The silence was loud, dripping water splattering onto the floor filled your ears as you scanned through the building to find a hiding spot. He couldn't be far away. You had a hunch that Spencer knew this city better than you, wondering just how many people had been in your situation before. How many people have experienced the sheer amount of fear that his voice shocked your system with?
Despite being nearly empty, there were still a few scattered remnants of activity: old wooden crates piled in one corner, a rusted metal shelving unit leaning precariously against a wall, and a cluster of large, dusty tarps draped over what looked like abandoned machinery.
Behind the crates, there was just enough space to squeeze into a narrow gap, shielded from view by the stacked boxes. The shelves, though unstable, provided a potential hiding spot if you were careful not to make a sound—one wrong move, and the whole thing could come crashing down over you. The tarps were the most tempting option, covering enough ground to allow you to slip beneath them and blend into the shadows they cast, but they blocked your vision. Each hiding spot had its risks, but they were your best chance to stay hidden in this desolate place.
You decided on the crates, quickly squeezing into the narrow gap behind them. The smell of dust and old wood filled your nostrils as you settled into the shadows, your heart pounding in your chest. You could just barely see through the slats in the crates, giving you a limited view of the warehouse floor.
Moments later, a figure appeared in the dim light of what must've been the main entrance to the building. He strolled in with a casual confidence that sent a chill down your spine, his silhouette tall and imposing. As he moved further into the warehouse, he began to whistle—a slow, haunting melody that echoed off the walls. The sound was unnervingly cheerful, completely at odds with the tension that crackled in the air.
"You can't hide from me forever! There's nowhere to run." His voice echoed through the nearly empty warehouse, a chilling reminder of the footsteps that drew closer with every passing second.
You held your breath, trying to stay as still as possible, peering through the slats to keep an eye on him. The melody continued like a twisted lullaby, it made your skin crawl. Spencer’s head swiveled slightly as if he was listening for any hint of movement, his pace unhurried as he drew closer to the crates.
Every instinct screamed at you to stay hidden, to remain perfectly still, but the fear gnawing at you was almost unbearable. Spencer’s whistling filled the empty space, making the warehouse seem even more desolate, even more inescapable.
Your muscles ached from staying so still, but you forced yourself to remain motionless, watching Spencer’s every move through the slats in the crates. His whistling continued, the eerie melody twisting in your mind. You tried to control your breathing, to keep it slow and quiet, but fear had a way of making even the smallest actions feel impossible.
Just as you shifted slightly to ease the tension in your legs, your foot brushed against a loose piece of wood. The small creak it made seemed deafening in the silence, and your heart skipped a beat as Spencer’s whistling abruptly stopped. The sudden quiet was more terrifying than the sound itself.
Spencer paused mid-step, his head tilting slightly as if he’d heard something. You could see his eyes narrowing, his focus sharp as he scanned the warehouse. You held your breath, praying he would dismiss the noise as just the old building settling. But instead, he started moving again, slower this time, his eyes sweeping the area around the crates.
Then, just as you thought he might pass by, Spencer suddenly changed direction, heading toward a spot where you couldn’t see him through the slats. Panic surged through you—if you couldn’t see him, you couldn’t anticipate his next move. You strained to hear, but the warehouse was filled with overpowering silence, your heartbeat thudding loudly in your ears.
You remained frozen, every nerve on edge, until suddenly you felt a hand seize a fistful of your hair. Pain shot through your scalp as your head was yanked back, forcing you to look up. There he was, his face inches from yours, his eyes dark and filled with a twisted amusement. The smirk you had dreaded seeing was there, curling at the corner of his lips as he stared down at you, triumphant.
“Found you,” he whispered, his voice low and menacing, sending a fresh wave of terror through your body.
Your breath hitched in your throat, panic flooding your senses, overwhelming every rational thought. The room began to spin, the edges of your vision blurring as the reality of your situation closed in on you. Spencer’s grip tightened, his smirk deepening as he watched the fear consume you.
Your heart pounded erratically, each beat growing fainter as a cold sweat broke out across your skin. The world around you faded, the warehouse and Spencer’s terrifying presence becoming distant, shadowy shapes. You could hear his voice, low and mocking, but it sounded far away as if submerged underwater.
Then, all at once, the fear became too much. Your body couldn’t take it anymore. Darkness crept in from the edges of your vision, and before you could register what was happening, your eyes rolled back, and everything went black.
“Guess it’s time for you to meet the boss,” he murmured, his words laced with cruel amusement as you started slipping. The last thing you felt was the cold, unforgiving floor as your body slumped forward, unconscious, completely at the mercy of the man who had hunted you down.
You were jolted awake by the sudden, shocking cold of your head being plunged into a bucket of water. Panic surged through you as you flailed, gasping for air when you were finally pulled out, only to be hoisted off the floor by two large men. Your body was weak, limbs heavy from fear and exhaustion, as they dragged you across the room. You blinked rapidly, trying to clear your vision, but the disorientation lingered.
When your eyes finally focused, you found yourself in a dimly lit office. The centerpiece of the room was a massive wooden desk, polished to a dark sheen. Behind it sat Rossi, the mob boss, lounging in a big leather chair that looked close to a throne. He was idly playing with the rings on his fingers, twisting them around as if deep in thought, though his cold eyes were fixed on you. His presence was commanding, exuding power with every casual movement. He leaned back, observing you with cold, calculating eyes.
Spencer was there too, standing behind the desk, his eyes not on Rossi but on you. He seemed relaxed, casually admiring the various knick-knacks that decorated the shelves behind the boss. But something was unsettling in the way his gaze kept drifting back to you, lingering a little too long. His dark eyes were filled with a growing hunger, a lust that made your skin crawl. As he licked his lips, you could feel his desire radiating off him in waves, and it made your stomach turn.
Rossi’s voice cut through the tension in the room, smooth and authoritative. He spoke about the debt you owed, laying out macabre options for repayment, each more horrifying than the last. His tone was casual, almost bored as if he were discussing mundane business rather than your fate. But despite his nonchalant demeanor, Rossi was not one to miss anything. He noticed the way Spencer's gaze was fixed on you, the way his lips curled in anticipation.
Without breaking his stride, Rossi’s sharp eyes flicked to the two henchmen holding you. “Take her away,” he ordered, his voice calm but commanding. “Lock her up in the back room.”
The henchmen didn’t hesitate, dragging you out of the office and down a dark corridor. Fear absorbed you as you realized what was coming next. As they pulled you further away, the last thing you heard was Rossi’s voice, low and authoritative, addressing Spencer.
“She’s all yours, boy.”
The words echoed in your mind as the door slammed shut behind you, leaving you alone in the cold, dimly lit room, with only the sound of your rough breathing to keep you company.
What felt like hours had passed since you were thrown into the dim, cold room. The only light came from a small, grimy window high up on the wall, barely large enough to squeeze through. Desperation gnawed at you as the reality of your situation set in. You couldn’t just sit here and wait for whatever plans Spencer had in store for you.
With renewed determination, you climbed onto the rickety table beneath the window and started pounding on the glass with your fists. The sound echoed in the small space, but the window refused to give. Frustration and fear fueled your efforts, each strike harder than the last until your hands ached and your hope began to weaken.
Then, just as you were about to strike again, a voice, smooth and taunting, cut through the silence. “You really think that’s going to work?”
You froze, your breath catching in your throat as you turned to see Spencer standing in the doorway. He leaned casually against the doorframe, arms crossed, watching you with that same unsettling, predatory gaze. His presence filled the room with an oppressive weight, and your heart sank as you realized how long he might have been standing there, silently observing.
Your eyes flicked to the open door behind him, Spencer instinctively followed your gaze, as you calculated the distance, wondering if you could make a run for it. But before you could move, Spencer’s lips curled into a knowing smirk.
“Don’t even think about it,” he said, his tone laced with dark amusement. “The guards are right outside. You wouldn’t get two steps before they'd drag you back.”
He stepped inside the room, locking the door behind him with a soft click that sent a shiver down your spine. The sound was final, cutting off any last hope of escape. Spencer’s eyes were fixed on you as he slowly closed the distance between you, each step deliberate, predatory.
When he was close enough, he reached out and grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at him. His grip was firm, fingers digging into your skin just enough to make you flinch. His face was so close you could feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, and the power in his eyes was almost painful.
“You’re not going anywhere,” he whispered, his voice low and dangerous, as if savoring every word. His thumb brushed over your lower lip, a mockingly tender gesture that only made the situation more terrifying. “You belong to me now.”
Until now, your fear and the dim lighting through the streets had kept his features in shadow, but with him this close, every detail became starkly clear.
He was tall, standing over you with an imposing presence that seemed to fill the entire room. His brown eyes, sharp and intense, locked onto yours with an unsettling focus. There was a calculating glint in those eyes as if he was dissecting every aspect of your fear and desperation. His stubble was neatly groomed, giving him a rugged, but carefully maintained look. It was clear that he put thought into his appearance, despite the rough edge it conveyed.
His hair was curly, styled in a way that looked effortlessly messy but was clearly intended to appear that way. It was a deliberate disarray, a chaotic yet tidy arrangement that only added to his imposing aura. The overall effect was one of calculated carelessness—a style that spoke of someone who was both meticulous and unapologetically confident.
You found yourself unable to look away, forced to take in every detail of his face as he studied you with that predatory smirk. The harsh lines of his stubble, the casual sweep of his curls, the sharpness in his gaze—it all added up to a man who was in control, a man who was used to getting what he wanted. The realization of how meticulously he crafted his appearance only heightened your sense of dread. This was not just a random enforcer; he was someone who took pride in his role, someone who thrived on the power he held over others.
"I… I'm not scared of you." You stuttered, although your heart was racing. You tried to appear in control of the situation, yet you weren't.
He leaned in closer, his breath hot against your ear. “You know,” he murmured, his voice a low, teasing purr, “it’s not just about fear. There’s something else I can sense.”
You shivered at his words, the combination of his tone and the physical closeness making your pulse race. Spencer’s thumb brushed lightly over your lips, the touch surprisingly gentle yet filled with a predatory intent. He knew exactly how to push your buttons, to make you squirm without ever laying a hand on you.
His lips curled into a smirk as he continued, his voice a seductive whisper. “It’s almost like you’re enjoying the attention. Isn’t that interesting?”
Your face flushed with a mix of embarrassment and confusion, the intense gaze from his eyes only amplifying your discomfort. His teasing manner was almost more torturous than if he had been more overt. The way he spoke made it clear he was playing a game, one where your emotional reactions were the reward.
Spencer leaned back slightly, giving you a moment of peace before leaning in again, his face close enough that you could see the faintest hint of amusement in his eyes. “Don’t worry,” he said softly, almost sympathetically, “this is just the beginning. I’m not going to make this easy for you.”
He stepped back, still holding your chin firmly but allowing you some space. The smirk on his face was unmistakable—he was reveling in the control he had over you. The room seemed to close in as you were left to process his words, the heat in your cheeks a testament to the psychological game he was playing.
He leaned closer, his breath warm against your neck. “You’re so easy to read,” he whispered, his voice low and seductive. “I can see the way you react to every little touch, every word.”
His fingers traced a slow, deliberate path from your chin down to your collarbone, each movement designed to provoke. The sensation was both electric and maddening, his touch lingering just long enough to drive you wild. He seemed to take pleasure in your reactions, savoring the way you tensed and shivered under his touch.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asked, his voice a tantalizing tease. The question was rhetorical, meant to deepen your sense of helplessness. His eyes remained locked on yours, studying every flicker of emotion that crossed your face.
Spencer’s touch moved to your shoulders, his fingers grazing the skin with a feathery lightness that was almost unbearable. He was so close that you could feel the heat from his body, a constant reminder of the command he held over you.
He leaned in, his lips brushing against your ear as he continued to speak in that same low, seductive tone. “You’re not going to get any relief from me unless you let me see exactly what I want to see. Until then, I’ll just keep playing.”
Spencer’s smirk widened as he continued to test the boundaries of your resolve. His fingers, which had been exploring the more exposed areas of your skin, moved with deliberate intent. He leaned in closer, the heat of his breath mingling with the growing sense of vulnerability you felt.
His hand drifted lower, and you felt a jolt of anxiety as his fingers brushed against the waistband of your pants. The touch was teasing, a reminder of how completely he had taken control of the situation. His movements were slow and calculated, each brush against your skin designed to provoke a reaction.
You flinched as his hand inched past the waistband, the action crossing a boundary that made your heart race. Spencer’s eyes gleamed with satisfaction as he felt the fabric of your underwear beneath his fingertips, his touch both maddeningly faint and unsettlingly deliberate.
“Just a little closer,” he murmured, his voice dripping with dark amusement. “I want to see how much you can take.”
The sensation was overwhelming, creating a surge of conflicting emotions—fear, discomfort, and a desperate need for relief. Spencer seemed to revel in the control he had, his touch a constant reminder of how he could manipulate your reactions.
His hand lingered just enough to make you squirm, every brush of his fingers designed to heighten your sense of exposure. He maintained a close proximity, his face only inches from yours, ensuring that you were fully aware of his dominance.
As he continued his teasing exploration, his gaze never left yours, studying your reactions with a predatory focus. The psychological impact of his actions was evident in the way he played with your sense of control, leaving you trapped in a whirlwind of emotions and tension.
Without warning, he closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a fierce, demanding kiss. His kiss was insistent, a claim that spoke of his control and authority. His lips moved over yours with a fierce hunger, as if he was trying to consume every part of you. The kiss was both intense and electrifying, a physical manifestation of the power he held over you.
You felt a mix of helplessness and intrigue as his kiss deepened, his dominance apparent in the way he controlled the pace and intensity. His hands roamed over your body with an assertive confidence, making it clear that he was in charge of this moment. The kiss left you breathless, your senses overwhelmed by the sheer force of his passion.
But as the kiss continued, something shifted in Spencer’s demeanor. His initial control and dominance seemed to give way to a more primal urgency. He pulled back abruptly, his breath ragged, eyes dark with a mix of frustration and desire.
In a sudden, almost desperate motion, Spencer seized you by the waist and threw you onto the bed behind him. The movement was rough, almost as if he couldn’t contain the intensity of his emotions any longer. You landed on the bed with a jolt, the impact leaving you momentarily stunned.
Spencer stood over you, his chest heaving, the earlier dominance in his gaze replaced by a raw, unrestrained desire. He looked down at you with a mixture of frustration and need, his body tense as he tried to regain control of the situation. The shift from controlled passion to uncontrollable urgency was palpable, leaving both of you in silence, the air thick with unspoken tension and the aftermath of the intense kiss.
He undressed with a practiced ease, his gaze never leaving you. The room was filled with a tense silence as he removed his shirt, then his belt, his movements methodical yet charged with an underlying urgency. His actions were slow and deliberate, each piece of clothing discarded adding to the intensity of the moment.
As he finished undressing, Spencer’s gaze remained locked on you, a mix of desire and dominance evident in his eyes. He approached the bed with a purposeful stride, his confidence unmistakable. The sight of him, now fully exposed and moving with a mix of control and raw desire, only heightened the tension in the room.
Spencer crawled onto the bed, his movements predatory and deliberate. He positioned himself above you, his body pressing down with a commanding presence. His touch was firm but carefully controlled as he began to undress you. His fingers moved with skilled ease, undoing buttons and slipping fabric from your body with a mix of precision and urgency.
Each movement was calculated to assert his dominance, his hands brushing over your skin with a mix of intent and intimacy. His eyes were focused, studying your reactions as he worked, a smirk playing at the corners of his lips as he took in the effect of his actions.
Despite the forcefulness of the moment, there was a clear sense of control in Spencer’s actions. He took his time, savoring the power he held over you, ensuring that every touch and movement was calculated to maintain his dominance.
“You look incredible,” Spencer murmured, his voice a low, sultry growl. His fingertips traced a deliberate path from your collarbone down to the edge of your waist. “Absolutely breathtaking.” He moaned.
“Spencer…” you began, your voice barely a whisper. “What are you—”
Before you could finish, Spencer silenced you with a fierce, demanding kiss. His lips moved against yours with a heated haste, his hands roaming over your body with a mixture of tenderness and assertiveness. His touch was electric, sending waves of sensation through you as he explored every curve.
When he pulled back, his gaze was intense, almost searching.
“Tell me what you want,” he said, his voice low and commanding. “I need to hear it.” Your heart pounded as you met his gaze, the vulnerability of the moment making it difficult to find the right words.
“I want… I want you,” you finally managed, your voice trembling with a mix of desire and fear. Tears threatened to fall from the mix of confusing emotions.
Spencer’s smirk widened, a satisfied glint in his eyes. “Good,” he said, his tone laced with satisfaction.
You responded to his touch, your body arching and shifting beneath him. The room seemed to vibrate with the intensity of your connection, each movement and kiss amplifying the sensation of being completely and utterly desired.
When Spencer finally eased himself into you, his movements were measured and deliberate. He looked down at you, his expression a mix of passion and concern. “Are you okay?” he asked, his voice low and filled with genuine care. You nodded slowly unable to form any words, your breath coming in quick, shallow gasps.
He began to move with a steady rhythm, each thrust deep and deliberate. His eyes never left yours, studying every flicker of emotion that crossed your face. “You feel incredible,” he said, his voice a husky whisper. “I’m never going to get tired of this.”
As the rhythm between you and Spencer grew more intense, the room seemed to pulse with the energy of your shared experience. Every touch, every kiss, and every movement was charged with a profound sense of connection and desire. The air was thick with anticipation, and the world outside felt like it had faded into a distant echo.
Spencer’s movements became more urgent, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he watched your every reaction. His hands gripped your body with a mix of tenderness and need, guiding you through the waves of pleasure that were building with each passing second.
“Look at me,” Spencer said, his voice a low, commanding whisper.
You locked eyes with him, the intensity of his gaze mirroring the intensity of your emotions. The pressure inside you grew, a rising tide of sensation that made it hard to focus on anything but the overwhelming pleasure. Your breaths came faster, each gasp and moan a testament to the climax that was building.
With a final, deep thrust, the release hit you like a tidal wave. The pleasure surged through you, a powerful crescendo that left you gasping and trembling. Your body arched in response, the intensity of the moment overwhelming your senses. Spencer’s grip tightened as he held you close, his own release following closely behind.
“Are you okay?” Spencer asked, his voice soft as he pulled you into his embrace. You nodded.
As the room settled into a quieter, more intimate atmosphere, Spencer's intense gaze remained fixed on you. His breathing was heavy, but his demeanor shifted slightly, a subtle return to the commanding presence he had exhibited earlier.
He pulled back slightly, his eyes still smoldering with a mix of satisfaction and dominance. “Good,” he said, his voice a low, throaty rumble. “I’m glad you enjoyed that.”
You looked up at him, your breaths coming in soft, shaky gasps. The intensity of the moment was still fresh in your mind, but Spencer’s words brought a new layer of complexity to the encounter. His smirk held a touch of the predatory edge that had marked his earlier actions.
“Because,” Spencer continued, his voice taking on a more authoritative tone, “you still have a lot of debt to pay.”
His words hung in the air, their impact as sharp as the bite of his earlier touches. The shift in his tone was stark, the reminder of your precarious situation a jarring contrast to the intimacy you had just shared. It was clear that, despite the physical and emotional connection between you, the underlying reality of your debt and his control over you was never far from his mind.
“You think this is over?” he asked with a chuckle, his eyes narrowing slightly as he studied your reaction. “This was just part one of the payment. You owe more than that.”
The reality of his words hit you with a mix of dread and resignation. The pleasure you had experienced seemed to clash with the reminder of your situation. Spencer’s dominance was evident not only in his actions but in the way he asserted his control over your circumstances once again.
He leaned in closer, his breath warm against your ear. “I’m going to make sure you understand exactly what it means to be in debt to me,” he whispered. “This is just the beginning.”
Thumbs up to you for making it this far ;)
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A Fatherly Fear
Based on this request.
Pairing: Eris Vanserra x Fem!Reader
Summary: Eris has doubts about how good of a father he’ll truly be, Reader eases his mind.
Warnings: pregnant reader | mentions of abuse | mentions of manipulation | basic Vanserra childhood trauma stuff | hurt/comfort | fluff
1.8k words
I winced as a cold breeze entered my bedroom, huffing as I stirred from sleep and held the blankets to my chin as I shifted closer to my mate, who was always there to warm me up no matter the climate. The fire in his veins had been a blessing throughout the long winter months.
But his side of the mattress had been vacant. I squint one eye open, only to find ruffled sheets. I sit up and open both my eyes as I search for my mate in the dark room.
"Eris?" I murmured, rubbing at my eyelids with the heel of my palms.
When I receive no reply I quietly groan, slipping from the warm bed, padding towards the open balcony doors. That explained the chilling breeze.
I go to slide the glass door closed when I spot a familiar redhead staring out at the crescent moon in the sky, leaning against the railing of the balcony.
I frown and step out into the frigid night, immediately wanting to go back to our heated bed and bundle myself in the blankets, but he had already turned to look at me with despondent eyes and I knew there was no way I'd leave him out here.
"What are you doing awake?" I pace towards him, craving his fire. "Come back to bed," I wrap my arms around one of his biceps as I stare up at him.
He looks down at the golden signet ring in his hands, the one that had belonged to his father, and his father's father before him. "Couldn't sleep," He sighed, looking out at the green forest, vibrant under the moonlight. The smell of spring was unmistakable in the night-chilled mist.
I knew that Eris hadn't been sleeping well since the beginning of my pregnancy, I was unsure if that was because he was paranoid about my safety, or paranoid about becoming a father. I wish I could ease his mind about both.
I simply lean into him, his arm coming around my back as I laid my head on his chest. I watched the trees sway with the wind, and the stars twinkle in the night sky, I even spotted a doe trotting freely in the game park below us. I waited in the comfortable silence, letting him decide if he wanted to talk or not. Eventually, he broke our silence.
"My father," He began. "He used to beat me and my brothers with this ring on," He stated, holding the ring up and over the balcony. It was beautifully crafted, and no doubt solid gold. "I can still remember how cold it felt on my skin," He hummed, putting it back on his fourth finger.
I turned away from the railing, wrapping both my arms tightly around my mate, holding him close and bathing in the warmth he radiated.
I hated the idea of Beron still having an effect on Eris, on anyone living really. The late high lord would be rolling in his grave if he knew he was still tormenting souls.
"He's gone now," I say, propping my chin up onto his chest to stare up at him. "He can't hurt you," I brush a strand of loose hair from his eyes.
"No," He shook his head. "He can't," He placed his hands on my waist.
I cup my hands over his, smiling when I feel the chill of his wedding band. "I much prefer this ring anyway," I said, brushing my thumb against it.
He nodded, leaning down and resting his forehead against mine. "You should go back to bed, you need your rest," He murmured and I shook my head no, turning away from him and back to the rolling hills and mountains in the distance.
"You do too," I spoke stubbornly. "So we'll stay out here until you're ready to go back inside," I finalized, leaning back into his chest while he wrapped his muscular arms firmly around my waist.
The silence danced around us yet again, but it was an easy sort of quiet, the kind where crickets chirped and owls hooted in order to fill it.
"My mother used to tell me stories from the past, when my father was a better man," He began, tightening his hold around me, warming me to my very core. "Before he had power, before he had me, she said he had been so different then." His chin comes down onto the top of my head. "I know now that he was manipulating her, hurling her into a royal marriage when she was freshly twenty," He continues, taking a deep breath between his next words. "But still, a part of me likes to believe he had a soul before he became power-hungry."
I let him talk, let him sift through all the thoughts in his mind.
"I guess, what I'm trying to say is that I'm terrified I'll be just like him when our child is born," He confesses into my hair and my brows bunch. I whirl around to face him with a stern expression.
"Your father was a monster," I state plain and simple. Eris' eyes darken.
"Yes, and I was his favorite son," He stressed and something inside my gut tightened. I hated seeing him like this, so worked up due to his own mind reeling with no one around to tell him it was going to be okay.
"That doesn't make you him," I bring my hands to his jaw. "Look at me," I whispered and he did as I said, his beautiful amber eyes meeting my gaze. "You're not him, you're not your mother, you're Eris Vanserra. My amazing mate, and the father of my child," I argue. "You're just you, who runs through your blood can't affect who you choose to be, do you understand me?" I lifted a brow and he nodded. "Tell me you understand me," I demanded and he smiled.
"I understand you, my love, I understand you," He reassured and my shoulders fell with the release of tension. He inches forward and places a chaste kiss on my lips.
"You're going to be such a good mom," He whispers, holding me achingly close like I might slip from his grasp at any moment. "I hope he turns out more like you," He pulls back to look me in the eye and I beam up at him, thinking about our soon-to-be son, he matches the grin and I swear I fall in love all over again.
"Only if he has your smile," I bargain and he debates it for a moment before muttering, "Deal." Then leaning in again and attaching our lips.
I melt into his touch, wrapping my arms around the back of his neck. "But," I pull away for air. "No matter what he looks like, or how he acts, I'm certain you'd tear this continent apart if anything ever happened to him," I remark and his soft smile was an answer enough that I was correct. He pecks me in reply.
"Come back to bed." I intertwine our hands, dangling them between us as I slowly pull away from him, receding towards the glass doors behind me.
"It gets so cold without you," I whine and he smirks knowingly.
"Says a girl from the Summer Court," He teases and I scowl at him playfully.
"She up, you know I can't use magic while I'm pregnant with your baby," I somehow pin the blame on him and he chuckles, allowing me to drag him back into our bedroom.
I let go of his hands and slid the glass door shut, locking it and keeping the persistent cold out. "Gods, I hope our children don't complain as much as you," He sighs, flopping down onto the bed.
"Oh honey, we're going to be the bane of your existence," I taunt, crawling up towards him on the mattress.
"Impossible," He sighs, grabbing me by the hips and pulling me right into him.
He wrapped his arms around me, the blankets covering the both of us and as if he knew exactly what I needed, the comforter began to seep warmth, the way the sun's rays felt after a rainy day.
"Wait," I perked up to look at him.
"What is it?" His brows furrowed.
"You said children, as in, more than one," I recalled and he looked at me confused.
"What are you talking about?"
"You said, I hope our children don't complain as much as you," I say, mocking him with a deep voice.
His confusion remained prominent on his face. "What about it?" He arched a brow. "I mean, whatever you want is fine with me but I wasn't exactly planning on only having one," He frowned.
"Well, how many do you want?" I asked, and you'd think this is something we would have talked about before he put a baby in me.
"I want a girl," He confessed. "Once we have a girl I'll be satisfied," He explained and I paled.
The Vanserra family was known for having a very long lineage of only male offspring. Whether it was a curse, magic, or dumb luck she wasn't quite sure. But he seemed entirely serious.
I stared at him with a fearful look in my eyes and he burst out laughing, chuckling at my expression.
"Gods, you should see your face," He hummed between breaths, cupping my cheeks in his hands.
"My pretty girl," He sighed once he got his amusement under control. "I promise I don't want anything that you wouldn't be comfortable with," He reassured and my anxiety declined. "But I would love to fuck another baby into you," He hummed, throwing his arms back around me.
"For a male so worried about becoming a father, you seem horny at the idea of getting me pregnant," I say and he grins.
"You just, I like the idea of having a family with you," He confesses and I lean upward, kissing him gently.
"I like the idea of having a family with you, too," I reply and he flushes so red that I could see the hue in the dark. I don't say anything, just peck his lips, reveling in the idea of being about to have a kid and still being able to make him blush.
"Get some sleep, Eris," I say softly against his lips. "You can tell me all about your plans for our family in the morning," I murmur through a yawn, furrowing deeper into his chest, melting into his warmth.
"Goodnight, beautiful," He whispered, running a hand through my hair until I drifted off beneath his touch.
It took him a moment to join me in a slumber, but the thoughts of his father were wiped away by my comforting words. And after a moment of reciting them, he was able to finally find some rest.
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Oranges to orange juice
꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎ ꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎
Pairing: Hyunjin X gn reader
Summary: Disordered eating is hard and when Hyunjin overhears you throwing up in the bathroom, he snaps.
Genre: Angst & comfort/hurt
Word Count: 2.8K
Trigger warning: Disordered eating, binging, purging, starving, mentions of vomiting, over-exercising, calorie counting, and a binge eating episode.
A/N: Requestee, I can't lie to you, every time I sat down to write this, I couldn't find the words because this hits a little too close to home. This was one of the hardest things that I've ever had to force myself to write. I tried to make it angsty, but it also felt entirely wrong to do that, so I gave it a happier ending. I hope you like it <3
_ _ _
How did it go so wrong? When did food start to become the enemy? When did substance become poison? How did something, supposed to fill and nurture you, start to craft more evil in your brain than anything else? When did the line between harm and health become blurred?
Over consumption. Starvation. Fall into a binge cycle and purge it back up. Calories in and calories out. Walking around the same path in your neighborhood over and over and over again. These days more hair seems to slip through your fingers. The brown bags beneath your eyes protruded. When was the last time you didn’t feel like a walking zombie?
Caught like a skipping record, you were repeating the toxic cycle. You knew you were damaging yourself, but you didn’t care. Your weight was yo-yoing and you were losing sleep over it. Just one more quick pinterest workout. Skip another meal. Feel so proud for starving yourself all day and then falling victim to an evening binge.
Like a tilt-a-whirl with no seatbelts, just when you thought the ride would stop, your brain would speak, and you’d be thrown hard into the sides of your skull again. Your body was begging for you to stop. The eye bags. The exhaustion. The chills. The scrapes on your knuckles and yellowed teeth. Your brain begged for an ounce of love, but you had none to give.
Had it happened in elementary school? Some kids threw cruel words your way. Were you a bit older? Still growing into your body as a preteen when someone said something and your brain clung to the words like glue. Were you in high school when you dived headfirst to the toxic culture of strict dieting?
The celebrities, the idols, the magazines in the early 2000’s calling people fat right at eye-level in the grocery store. When back to school trips and trying on clothes felt more like a chore more than anything. Glossy tears slipping beneath the fluorescent lights as you twisted and turned and pulled and pinched your skin wishing your body looked different.
Every sweet taste of a cupcake felt like gaining ten pounds. The richness of the icing. The dense cake that you knew would go directly to your gut, so you swapped it for an apple, but then the latest trends began to discuss how bad natural sugar was for you, so you skipped fruit altogether.
Hyunjin has always been your pride and joy for quite a while. Dating him felt like winning the lottery and it came with a lot of triumphs, but also a lot of stipulations. You couldn’t be ugly when dating an idol, let alone, a Versace ambassador. So yes, you won, but at what cost?
Eating disorders are ugly things. People tended to romanticize them, but there was nothing pretty about scraped knuckles. Sticking fingers down your throat and eventually losing your gag reflex because you kept throwing up your food. The sense of victory and impending relief you felt when nothing could come up anymore.
The feeling of ice water on an empty stomach is addicting. Waking up without being bloated. The empty feeling that lingers as you reject food. You can’t help, but feel proud of yourself, but the opposite is true when you binge. You promise yourself you’ll stop, but soon you’re deep in three-thousand calories and all you can think about is which body part will bulge next.
The broken capillaries in your eyes from forcing the retching. The aching knuckles that pain shoots through every time you bend them. The puffy cheeks, the hair loss, the naked weigh-ins. Waking up every morning or getting beneath the stream at night and taking a cold shower because it burnt more calories. There was nothing pretty about eating disorders.
They always have the potential to catch up and yours did. Hyunjin was teaching you in the dance room. He was teaching you the counts of the dance that you wanted to learn when you suddenly collapsed. He barely got to you in time before you slammed the floor.
When you awoke a few moments later, he pushed applesauce and a plastic spoon towards you. A bottle of water followed as he worried that your blood sugar was low. You glanced at the applesauce, already knowing how many calories were in it, and you refused it.
He didn’t understand it at first, but then it clicked. He didn’t know when the last time you ate food was. You were always insisting you already ate. Always pushing aside snacks and insisting you were full from lunch, but when was the last time he saw you eat lunch?
His suspicions were confirmed when he offered to take you out to dinner. You tried to hide the panic, but it was obvious. When he confronted you about your unhealthy habits, you nearly burst into tears on the spot and he swore he’d help you, but the truth was so much more complex.
Sometimes you don’t have the power to save people from their inner demons. As much as people would like to play god, sometimes a person has to be willing to take the plunge. They have to be willing to work on themselves from within. Find the root of the problems, nurture that hurt, begin to slowly rebuild themselves up instead of down.
And the truth? You were not ready. The truth is that eating disorders are addictive. There’s a certain kind of twisted competitiveness. When you go hours without eating and those hours slip from twelve to twenty-four and suddenly you’re at forty-eight hours without food. A toxic and warped pride becomes rooted inside and burrows around the roots of your brain. You might have had downfalls, but at least you could starve…until you binged again.
A seesaw without a winner. The constant up and down. Taking the plunge and soaring up high. The cycle became exhausting after a while, but addictions aren’t easily overcome. There’s always more than meets the eye.
Hyunjin tried his best to keep his tabs on you. Despite his busy schedule, he had been planning out healthy meals for the two of you. Every time he wanted you to help him cook, your brain screamed at you to stop. Every bite was another pound. You were torn between healing and gaining weight. For a few days, it was okay, but then you broke.
Outside the bathroom door, Hyunjin was silently listening to you heave up the contents of your stomach. He knew you were up to something when you didn’t return quickly from the bathroom. You swore it wouldn’t take that long, but you lied.
He hated that he couldn’t understand. He hated that he didn’t know why you were like this. In his head, food was a need, it wasn’t something you could just turn away from. Knowing that he spent all of last night prepping this stuff made it ten times worse. He spent so much time making it perfect and you were unloading your food into the toilet.
He sighed and shook his head while thinking about it. He couldn’t help you if you didn’t try to help yourself. His arms went over his chest and he found his socked foot tapping the beige carpeted floor. With a clenched jaw, he waited for you to reappear.
It took a few minutes before you finally reappeared while wiping away remnants of tears. You only took a step when a throat cleared and you were staring into the narrowed eyes of Hyunjin. “Are you done throwing up the meal I spent hours on?” He couldn’t help, but feel annoyed by your actions.
“I’m sorry, it didn’t agree with my stomach.” The lie slid through your teeth so easily. First it was one lie and then the next. You already ate. Snacks were already consumed. Of course, you were fine. Better than ever.
“Bullshit!” He spat. “I’m trying to help you and you won’t let me! God, how do you think this makes me feel? It’s disgusting! You have to have food to nourish you, so I’m not sure what doing any of this proves. Did you know stomach acid destroys your teeth?”
It was a slap to the face. Hurt was in your eyes, but he didn’t stop. The words buzzed straight into the core of your brain and seeped into the shutters of your heart. You were nothing, but a disappointment.
“I’ve been so busy the past few days and I just wanted one nice meal with my significant other. One nice meal! I even took the time to make homemade pasta and yet you still-” He scoffed and shook his head. “I give up. You know what? Do what you want.”
Tears began to well in your eyes as he spun around. “W-where are you going?”
“Away from you. Away from whatever this is. I’m packing up leftovers and taking it to people who’ll actually enjoy it. I can’t believe I learned to cook for you and this is what I get in response.”
He knew he was being cruel, but he couldn’t help it. He knew eating disorders weren’t easy, but he was so frustrated and terrified for you. He knew you’d disagree when it came to professional help. He couldn’t force you to go, it’ll kill you and he was terrified that you’d never forgive him.
The last you saw of him was his silhouette storming down the stairs, banging things around, and then the ear-shattering announcement of his disappearance with the door slamming shut. You sniffled and your bottom lip quivered as you headed towards the stairs.
When you got to the kitchen table, your plate was still there with half-eaten food. Still dressed up in garlic butter, your pasta remained untouched. Your fork still had bits of italian seasoning coating the prongs. The scent of garlic and onion continued to linger in the air.
The pasta on Hyunjin’s plate had disappeared. The pot that he made it on was missing from the stove. Besides the unrelenting and haunting tick of the clock, it was all still. You were alone with your thoughts, more worrying, you were emotionally stressed.
When you glanced at the cupboard, your mouth began to salivate with the memory of the glazed donuts you bought earlier. How sweet they’d be on your tongue. A glazed donut followed by something a little more savory, like the trail mix Hyunjin bought you the other day.
You tried to ignore the pressing thoughts. Stomach acid still stained your teeth. Your brain said no, but your stomach growled at the thought. You emptied the pasta from your stomach, but you were still hungry. The endorphins would spike, your stress would be temporarily relieved before the guilt set in, and so…
You practically flew across the tile floor in your socks. Flinging open the cupboard door, you found the box of glazed donuts and threw open the lid. The sticky feeling clung to your fingertips, but the taste of sugar was so sweet. Food could be a high that nothing else could compare to.
You didn’t know how long you spent binging. You scrounged around the cupboards like a rat. Digging through boxes and attempting to find more food. Crackers? You ate some. Some of Hyunjin’s cookies that he promised you could have? You ate those too.
When you finished, you could already feel the bloating begin. The feeling of your stomach being stretched to its near limits was unbearable. The binge settled and so did the realization of what you just did.
You sprinted back to the bathroom to make things right. When two fingers weren’t enough to trigger your gag reflex, soon it was replaced with three. Your stomach twisted and heaved. The stomach acid was harsh on your nasal cavity, but you couldn’t help it.
The cold toilet water mixed with vomit splashed on your face and made you heave more. You choked on chunk after chunk. The crackers scraped harshly into the sides of your throat, but you didn’t care. It all had to get out somehow.
When you were finished, you forced yourself up, rinsed your mouth out with water, and collapsed on the bed you shared with Hyunjin. There was something trapped inside of you that you just couldn’t seem to stop. How could you defeat your own brain? How did you balance health and harm?
Good fats, bad fats. Too much sodium. Too much sugar. The unsteady and tipsy feeling of weightlessness with an empty stomach. The heavy and sinking anchor of a full belly. When some people said one thing about food and yet others claimed different, who were you supposed to listen to?
You didn’t have the knowledge that doctors had or the knowledge of protein and macros and supplements. Food could be so confusing and it could be stressful. How were you ever supposed to see it as something nurturing? Some people said stay away from red meat, some said stay away from fruit, others said only strictly eat fruits, vegetables, and meats. How were you supposed to keep up with it all?
As your brain spun around in circles, at some point, you managed to fall asleep. When you reawakened, you woke up to a hand on your shoulder. You blinked your bleary eyes, trying to figure out what was happening.
“Baby?” The familiar voice of Hyunjin filled your ears. His verbal lashing from early reappeared in your sleepy brain. “Can you hear me?”
“What do you want?” You weakly got out.
“Get up.”
“No.”
You didn’t have a choice as he tugged on your arm and pulled you up. You didn’t fight it as he tugged you into his arms. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said the things I said. I didn’t mean any of it. I really didn’t, I just-” He sniffled.
“I know,” you mumbled.
“I’m so afraid for you and I don’t know how to help you. I don’t know how to keep you safe. I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. You’re irreplaceable to me.” His arms tightened around you as his chin gently sat on the top of your head. “I never should have taken my frustration out on you.”
He leaned back against the wooden headboard. You couldn’t stop your own tears from beginning to build up. Your fingers curled into his shirt. The steady wallop of his heartbeat brought you comfort.
“What do you need from me? How can I help you? What can I do for you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Baby, please, I need to know what you need.”
“Help,” you uttered the words that terrified you. “Someone who knows how to fix me. I don’t know how to fix the broken pieces. I-” A sob fell from your lips.
When was the last time you enjoyed a slice of your own birthday cake without feeling guilty? When did eating feel like enjoyment instead of a punishment? When was the last time you were excited to try a new food without worrying about the calories and sugar content?
“Just say the words and I will find you someone who can help. I-I can’t help you alone. You have to be willing, baby, please. I need you to try and fight this.”
“Please.”
“Please what?”
“Help.”
Hyunjin squeezed his eyes shut and clutched you tightly. He didn’t utter it out loud, but a silent prayer of gratitude filled his head. “Promise to try?” You nodded. “Thank you.” His lips pressed against the top of your head.
He began to slowly rock your body back and forth. Your eyes slipped shut and you let out a soft sigh of relief. You were terrified and yet, there were a few specks of relief. Maybe you really could fight this. Maybe you really could develop a healthier relationship with food.
Learn to stop tracking calories and working out until you nearly collapse from exhaustion. You needed a hail mary and as much as you tried to do it alone, you always seemed to relapse and make it all worse. It wouldn’t be easy, you knew that, but it was a start.
It was better than repeating the cycle. It was hard to spread your wings and fly, but you wanted to be better. You wanted to be stronger and healthier. You wanted to be happy and most of all, you wanted to have a long life, long enough to watch your relationship with Hyunjin bloom.
You wanted to meet people, to travel, to try new foods without feeling the rotten guilt. You wanted to enjoy your birthday cake. To embrace the growing older, live through new experiences, harness the wisdom, and share the love.
It was terrifying, but the more you thought about it, maybe, just maybe, maybe it was worth it.
| ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ |
Taglist: @lina-linny @straykidsstanforeverandever @seungnishi @stellasays45
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Three Hundred and Seventy-One Days | Luke Castellan
a/n: not canon-compliant! i hate this actually but i needed to write something to get me back in the zone! sunshine reader because i wanted a broody luke lol.
i. Three days.
Right before the sun sets behind the hill at Camp Half Blood, there's a chill in the air that hits Luke's skin in a way that makes him feel like he's back on the roof of his house in Connecticut. He found out about it when he returned from his failed quest when he was searching for a moment of solace, away from the pitiful eyes of the campers, away from the voice that haunted his dreams. Perched on a branch, hidden by the shade of the leaves, leaning against the bark of the tree with sticky amber clinging to the material of his orange shirt, Luke sits there until the sun disappears for the day.
It reminds him of the days he would crawl out of his bedroom window to escape the sounds of his mother's incoherent mumbling. He would sit there in nothing but a thin t-shirt and his cargo shorts, goosebumps rising on his skin, as he talked to himself. It was a bad habit he picked up in his younger years. He kept himself company at home because his mom didn't talk to him much, not really, and when she did, when her words made sense for once, all Luke could do was count down the minutes until he lost his mother again.
Before he was old enough to understand his heritage, who his father was, he used to pray to an entity he didn't believe in to give his mother moments of clarity, slivers of coherence so he at least knew something, anything, about the woman he called mom. But after the first time Luke's wishes were granted, he stopped praying. Somehow it was more painful watching his mother drift in and out of consciousness than it was living with a stranger he knew he loved, but knew nothing about.
For a year, that spot on the tree was a secret. Nobody knew that Luke would climb up there every day just to feel the breeze against his skin. Nobody questioned why the Hermes head counselor would disappear at the same time, until you came along.
"Whatcha doin' up there?"
Luke nearly lost his balance on the branch at the sound of your voice from under him. He looked down to see you smiling up at him, hands laced together behind your back. You were eighteen, the same as him, and when he first heard of your arrival, Luke was jealous. You got to have 18 years of childhood, while he was only granted half of that. It didn't seem fair.
"You should be at dinner," Luke replied, leaning back against the tree. The sun made the sky a soft orange color. The darkness of the night was creeping in through the corners of the sky, the chill he searches for each night engulfed him.
"To be fair, so should you, head counselor," You replied, analyzing the indents in the bark of the tree trunk that formed from Luke's constant climbing. You slotted your feet in the crevices, making your way to the tree branch beside Luke's. The two branches were close to each other, growing steadily until they almost touched at the tips. "Woah, this view is unreal."
"Be careful," He mumbled, clenching his jaw. "I'm not gonna take you to the infirmary if you fall and break a bone."
"Relax," You chuckled, situating yourself. "I can handle myself."
Luke nodded once and turned his attention back to the skyline. In this light, the scar across his cheek was prominent. It's healed well enough, but it still left a bump across his flesh that made Luke queasy every time he looked at it for too long. The two of you sat in silence as the sun disappeared. Luke tilted his head to look at you, only to find that you were already staring at him. He rubbed the side of his face against his shoulder as if trying to wipe away the scar on his shirt, "What are you doing here?"
You shrugged, "Not really into the whole offerings thing, to be honest."
"So you decided to wander into the woods alone?" Luke asked, "That's dangerous. There's a lot of things out here that you wouldn't believe. You can get hurt."
"But it's okay when you do it?"
"I know how to fight," Luke found himself taking on a defensive position. "You just got here."
"That doesn't mean I don't know how to fight," You replied. Your voice was calm, despite the slight bite to Luke's tone. "Just because I didn't spend my childhood playing with swords and bows and arrows doesn't mean I don't know how to fend for myself, y'know."
"The things out here are different from schoolyard bullies. I don't think you understand that."
"Are we going to ignore that I fought a hellhound on my way here or...?"
"You fought a hellhound?"
Luke wouldn't have guessed that by the way you walked into the Hermes cabin, all smiles and golden flecks of color in the irises of your eyes. You spoke in a preppy tone and he nearly had to grab his siblings by their ear to drag them away from you. If he was a betting man, he would bet that you were a child of Aphrodite.
"Mhm," You hummed, "See, I'm not so helpless."
"I didn't say you were."
"Yeah, but you implied it," You shrugged, not deterred by his tone. "Anyways, are you gonna tell me what you're doing here?"
"Well, I was trying to get some privacy," He replied. He should've been annoyed at the intrusion, but he couldn't bring himself to be upset with you as much as he should've been. "But that didn't go as planned."
"Sorry, sorry," You chuckled, putting your hands up in defense. "Didn't know keeping you company was a no-no. Maybe I do have some things to learn about camp after all."
He scoffed, "Hanging out with me should be the least of your worries."
"I dunno, I always seem to gravitate towards the broody types."
"I'm not broody."
"Right," You laughed. You turned to look at him, jaw dropping when you realized he was serious. "When was the last time you smiled? And not those fake, polite smiles you give to strangers trying to make small talk in the grocery store line, you know?"
No, he didn't know. He didn't go out much, much less to the grocery store to have conversations about the rising prices of produce or the lack of real milk options due to the infiltration of the non-dairy industry.
"I smile all the time," Luke replied, eyebrows furrowing in thought as he tried to remember the last time he smiled at someone. "I smile at campers."
"That's because it's your job, silly!" You giggled, shaking your head. "When was the last time you smiled just because?"
Luke pursed his lips, countering, "When was the last time you didn't smile?"
"When I was fighting the hellhound."
Luke felt his lips quirk up at that. It was a quick-witted response, he'll give you that. He stopped it from becoming anything more and cleared his throat.
"Okay, I'll leave you to it," You sighed, carefully stretching your legs down to the first indent on the tree. You skillfully climbed down and landed on your feet with a thud, "See you around, Luke."
Luke's mouth felt dry at the sound of his name leaving your lips. He was never a fan of his name before. He thought it sounded generic and unoriginal, but when you said it, it didn't sound half as bad as he thought it was. His stomach churned in a way that was foreign to him.
"Hopefully, not here!" He called out, watching as your figure retreated back to the main grounds. "Privacy, remember that!"
"I like the broody types, remember that!" You called back, waving to him before you disappeared into the maze of trees.
ii. Twelve days.
"You lied."
You looked up from your book with an eyebrow raised as you stared at the counselor at the foot of your bed. Luke was standing there, the signature stern look etched on his face. You placed your bookmark in your book, sitting up on your bed as you smiled at him, "Excuse me?"
He had his arms crossed over his chest, the beads of his camp necklace resting on the tops of his knuckles, "You lied. You didn't fight a hellhound."
"Okay, so I didn't fight a hellhound," You said, dragging on the word 'fight' for emphasis. "But I encountered a hellhound."
"Which you befriended."
"Which I befriended," You confirmed, "I named him Stanley. Wanna meet him?"
"No," Luke replied quickly. "That shouldn't even be allowed in here."
"He's sweet," You tutted, slipping your feet into your shoes as you stood up. "Give him a chance, I swear you'll love him."
"You're keeping a hellhound as a pet?"
"He's just a baby," You cooed, jutting out your bottom lip.
Luke felt his face twitch in half-annoyance and half-fondness. He didn't know if he found your naivete dangerous or charming, or both, but he was scared for you. You were too trusting for your own good, "He is not a baby. He's a monster."
"Don't talk about Stanley like that."
Luke rolled his eyes, falling into the same rhythm as your steps, "You don't realize how dangerous this is, Y/N."
"Here you go with the danger thing again," You teased, nudging him. Luke's breath got caught in his chest. Your simple touch seemed to burn his skin. Sparks erupted across his entire body. "Told you, I'll be fine."
"Not every monster you encounter can be defeated by the power of friendship. You can't rely on some kumbaya shit."
"Kumbaya?" You snorted, looking at him with an unreadable expression on your face. You scrunched your face up, a tiny smile tugging on your lips. "You're so...."
"I'm so what?" He questioned, planting his feet on the ground.
"Odd."
He tried not to take offense to that because while your words were like a dagger to his heart, the way you said it showed that you didn't mean it in a bad way. You seemed to be trying to figure him out, pressing his buttons, trying to see what made him tick. And you were succeeding. Luke never ventured to talk to new campers unless he was forced to by Chiron, but he couldn't fight the pull you had on him.
"Broody and odd," He said, resuming his steps, "I'm swooning."
The full belly laugh that escaped you made Luke's steps falter. Campers surrounding you looked at you, confused as to what Luke could've said that made you react that way. Surely, the Hermes Head Counselor wasn't that funny. He wasn't known to crack jokes, not since he returned. You couldn't help it, though. He said it in such a deadpan way that made your sides hurt from laughing so much.
"Just my type," You teased.
Luke didn't like how his cheeks were warming up at your comment. He's not one to flirt or be flirted with. He found girls attractive, sure, but most of them were too intimidated to talk to him so he never really had experience in that department. But he supposed since you grew up in the world, you were used to doing things like this. He wondered if you knew the effect you had on him.
"Dinner is supposed to be good tonight," He said, changing the subject. He was looking everywhere but you, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks that seemed to not want to subside.
"Oh, no you don't," You shook your head. "You are not gonna tempt me into going to dinner just so you can hide away in your tree. I'll be there, Castellan."
He grimaced. He was hoping that you'd fall for the trap, but he was learning quickly that you weren't as gullible as he hoped you'd be. Luke sighed, accepting defeat. "Fine, but can you just be careful? You've been lucky that there weren't any creatures lurking around."
"Why don't we just go together?" You asked, "So you can stop worrying about my safety and all."
"I'm not worried about your safety," He lied through his teeth. The idea wasn't bad though. It would keep him from wondering if you were attacked on your way to meet him. A shiver ran down his spine as he thought about it. He didn't like this weird protectiveness he had over you. He didn't even know you. "But fine. Meet me at the Hermes cabin after they ring for dinner."
"You got it," You saluted him playfully as you walked away, skipping to meet up with members of the Apollo cabin. How did you manage to make so many friends so quickly? And why did you insist on sticking with him when it's clear that you had other friends you could be bothering instead of him?
Luke tried not to think about it too much as he continued on with his day, but no matter how hard he tried, his mind kept pulling him back to you. During his lessons with other campers, he took mental notes of what moves he should teach you, just in case anything happened so you'd be prepared. During arts and crafts, he found himself reaching for the gold glitter because it reminded him of your eyes. This caused raised eyebrows from other campers since it was well-known that the counselor didn't like glitter post-Glitter Gate where he was shaking out glitter from his curls for days.
By the time dinner rolled around, he was thankful he stopped thinking about you, but soon realized that it was worse now that you were in front of him, all smiles and banter as you always were. It was getting harder to contain the redness of his cheeks as you complimented him in your own way.
"Lead the way, Castellan," You grinned.
Luke couldn't help but return your smile.
iii. Sixty-six days.
"Stanley, down," You instructed, leaning over to scratch the hellhound behind its ears. "Good boy."
Luke's sword was raised in a fighting stance as he watched you giggle as the hellhound nuzzled into your touch. You somehow managed to make him agree to meet the monster. Pathetically, it didn't take much for Luke to agree. It took you batting your eyelashes at him with a small pout and he reluctantly agreed to meet Stanley.
"Luke," You called him over, still petting the hellhound. "Come on, he won't do anything to you."
"I'm good right here," He grunted, holding onto his sword. "If he tries anything, one of us should be ready and you obviously have your guard down."
"He won't," You assured, "He's sweet."
"Nothing from the underworld is sweet, Y/N."
"You don't think I'm sweet?"
Luke rolled his eyes. You'd been claimed by your father, Hades, a few days ago. It made sense the more he thought about it. The hellhound wasn't sent to attack you, but to protect you. It was sent by your father to guide you to Camp Half Blood. "You're not technically from there."
"Same shit," You shrugged, patting the spot next to you on the grass for him to join you. "Come on, Luke. Come meet Stanley."
It was against everything he believed in. He shouldn't walk over to you to pet a monster like it was a stray dog on the side of the road, waiting to be rescued. But his feet seemed to have a mind of their own because before he knew it, he was walking over to you, sword tossed somewhere beside him to keep his hands free to touch the surprisingly soft fur of the hellhound.
The hellhound purred under Luke's touch, gentle and loving. If Luke ignored the scary color of its eyes, he would confidently say that it was just a dog. Luke's shoulders relaxed, "Okay, he's not half bad."
"Told you," You said, leaning against him. Luke's hands froze for a second, making the hellhound whine. He resumed his scratches, not wanting to take his chances and angering the dog. "See? Not all of us from the underworld are scary monsters."
"You're not from there," He repeated, "Stop saying that you are."
"Hades is my dad, Luke," You whispered. "So I am. I am a part of him."
"You're nothing like the gods."
There was something in his voice that made your heart pound in your chest. It was no secret that Luke's relationship with his father, and all of the gods for that matter, was strained. Luke saying that you were nothing like them with such sincerity made your head spin. It felt definite. It felt like a fact that he could never think of you as that.
"Could be nice though," You joked, trying to cover up the swell in your chest with humor. "Immortality and all."
"Nah, this one life is enough for me, I think."
"What? You're not shooting for rebirth?"
If anyone else would've asked him the same question a year ago, even a few weeks ago, he would've said no. If any of his other lives were like this one, he would decline the request if he could. All that he'd gone through in this lifetime was enough.
But now you were asking him that question with a twinkle of hope in your eyes that made him wonder if he'd judged this life too soon. Maybe there was more to life than fighting and running. Maybe the moments of life when he sits on a tree branch watching the sunset, or when he's yelling at his siblings to stop running in the cabin, or hell, even when he was petting a goddamn hellhound, were enough to make him wish for another shot at this life thing.
Maybe he just needed to learn a thing or two from you. If he could continue to know you in each lifetime, maybe he'll turn out fine.
"Maybe," Luke poked his tongue out the corner of his mouth. He blinked, "I don't know."
"Keep an open mind to it, is all I ask," You said. "I wanna find you in every universe just so I can annoy the shit out of you in each one."
He chuckled softly, not missing the smile that widened on your face as you watched him crack. "I changed my mind. No rebirth for me. I can only handle you in so many lifetimes."
"You'll grow to love me."
I know, Luke wanted to say, and that's the part that scares me the most. Throughout his years at Camp Half Blood, Luke prided himself in knowing that when push comes to shove, he can do what's necessary to succeed. It's what made him the perfect Head Counselor, the best swordsman that Camp Half Blood has seen in years. It's what made him a hero.
But now he didn't feel like that was the case anymore. He was growing soft, weak. He'd spent so much time trying to protect you and keep you from danger that he forgot about protecting himself. You found his Achilles heel and well, Luke was just waiting until he surrendered to you.
He opened his mouth to speak, "If Stanley doesn't kill me first."
If Luke could bottle up the sound of your laughter, he would.
iv. Three hundred and sixty-five days.
"Who is that?"
Luke followed Percy's eyes to the other side of the field. His lips turned up at the corners as he saw you waving at him with a smile on your face. Luke waved back with the same enthusiasm, confusing the boy beside him.
"That's Y/N," Luke responded, picking up his steps to meet you halfway. "That's my girlfriend."
"You have a girlfriend?"
"I know, shocker!" You teased, placing a kiss on Luke's cheek. Luke wrapped an arm around your waist, tugging you closer, completely oblivious to the grimace that graced Percy's face. "Mr. Stick-in-the-mud head counselor has a girlfriend."
"Hey!"
Percy scrunched his face up, "You kinda are a stick-in-the-mud. No offense."
"Offense taken," Luke scoffed, poking your side. "Y/N, this is Percy. He's new here."
You stretched out a hand in greeting, "Nice to meet ya, Percy. Welcome to Camp Half Blood."
"Are you always this preppy?"
"She is," Luke said, shrugging. "Nice change of pace from the rest of us, don't you think?"
"Sure," He nodded, eyeing the both of you. Luke's arm didn't move from your waist and you didn't seem to mind. He was too young to understand why you and Luke didn't want to have any personal space. "Are you joining us on the tour that Luke is giving me of Camp Half Blood?"
"Wish I could, but the Stolls are planning to TP the Ares cabin as a prank and I should probably stop them before someone gets maimed at Capture the Flag tomorrow," You cringed.
Luke sighed, dropping his head to your shoulder. You tangled your fingers through his curls, trying to offer some comfort, "I told them not to do that."
"When have your siblings ever listened to you?"
"They used to before you came along!" Luke groaned, "But now they only listen to the pretty counselor."
"Must run in the family," You teased.
"Shut up," Luke grumbled, lifting his head up. Percy could see the blush on Luke's cheeks and he cringed. He hoped he'd never end up like this when he became a teenager. It was obvious you had Luke wrapped around your finger. "Go stop them before Lee gives us a lecture on the dangers of resorting to violence. Again."
"I'm going, I'm going," You laughed. You placed a quick kiss to Luke's lips before waving goodbye to the two boys. Before you were out of earshot, you turned around, "Tree later?"
"See you there!" Luke replied, grinning at you until you made it across the field. He turned to Percy, scratching the back of his neck, "Sorry about that. Where were we?"
"Archery."
"Ah, right! Archery," Luke nodded, continuing his steps, "It's down this way."
Percy followed Luke through the field, staring at the signs that pointed in different directions. Camp Half Blood was huge. This tour was definitely going to take longer than he anticipated. Not wanting to continue with a lull in the conversation, Percy spoke up, "How long have you and Y/N been together?"
Percy figured that Luke would have a lot to say about you which would fill the silence. He was right. Luke smiled at the boy, "A few months. She got here last year and it's been us two ever since. Took me a minute to ask her out, though."
"Well if you liked her, why did you wait? That doesn't make much sense."
"It was complicated," He replied, "I didn't really accept that I liked her until way later. Kinda kept my feelings to myself for a while."
"Is this what being a teenager is like?" Percy asked, cringing at Luke's words. He always imagined that falling in love with someone was easy. If two people liked each other, they should be together, right?
"Yeah," Luke laughed, patting Percy on the back. "Enjoy your early years, Perce. It gets worse from here."
"Geez, you really know how to inspire confidence in someone."
The laugh that escaped Luke reminded him too much of you. There were parts of you that weaseled their way into him. He didn't understand why you laughed so hard at his deadpan comments before, but now that he was on the receiving end of it with Percy, he saw why.
Percy reminded Luke a lot of himself, back when he was younger. It was a weird thing to meet a foil of yourself, someone who you could've been if things had been different. Luke wondered if he'd be like Percy if his life hadn't been so cruel. Not that Percy's life was all sunshine and rainbows, either. Luke heard through the grapevine that Percy lost his mom during the battle with the minotaur, but at least he had a mom that he knew. He had a mom that cared for him.
Luke was dreading the day Percy got claimed. Something told him that it would cause a ripple effect. Start things that Luke wasn't ready for, not yet. Maybe he'll never be ready for it. Had he known that he'd meet you, maybe he wouldn't have said yes to it. Maybe if you had stumbled into Camp Half Blood a day earlier, he wouldn't be facing this.
Luke faked a smile, shaking away those thoughts, "Come on, archery's just around the corner."
v. Three hundred and seventy-one days.
"Thought I'd find you here."
Luke closed his eyes at the familiar voice that joined him on the tree branch. The separate branch that you used to it on morphed into his own. Two branches intertwined, a simple work of nature, but it felt like a symbol. An omen.
The fireworks illuminated the night sky. Luke had never been up here this late before. The air was cold.
"What are you doing here?"
You let out a dry chuckle, "Dejavu for a second there."
"Y/N."
You gulped, slowly inching towards him. There was a crease between his eyebrows as he stared ahead. You sighed, "I came looking for you."
"Why?"
"Luke, don't do this."
He sniffed, rubbing his eyes with his balled-up fists. He winced as he put too much pressure on his cheek, his scar stinging at the contact. It's been more sensitive lately the more he spoke to Kronos. He shook his head, "I have to."
"No, you don't," You pleaded, placing a hand on his arm. "It's not too late."
"It is. Don't you understand?" He sobbed, "It's too late."
"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"
"I didn't want to break your heart," He whispered. He felt silly saying it out loud, but it made sense to him at the time. He couldn't bare to see your face when he told you about everything. That's why he was going to leave without saying goodbye.
"How's that going for you?"
How you managed to make him laugh even during this, even during the end, was beyond Luke's understanding. He wished you didn't have an effect on him like this. It would make things so much easier.
"I'm sorry."
"For breaking my heart or for betraying all of us?"
Luke licked his lips, "Both."
You removed your hand from his arm. Luke shivered without your touch. "I'll see you again, yeah?"
"I don't know."
"I know," Tears pricked your eyes. Maybe it was the shock of it all, but you were calm. Too calm. It didn't feel real that just a few steps away, camp was in disarray because of the boy beside you. "Rebirth, remember? In every lifetime."
"Sure," He said. Maybe the hope of it all will be enough to get him through this. "I love you."
"I love you, too," You said, leaning over to place a last kiss on his lips. You pulled away as you felt your tears mixing with his, "Go, they'll come looking here soon."
Luke nodded and made his way down the tree. You watched him fade away in the distance.
#frances writes#luke castellan imagine#luke castellan pjo#luke pjo#luke castellan fanfic#luke castellan#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan x yn#luke castellan x y/n
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Hi! I recently saw W2H2 part 1 and I must say it’s pretty amazing! Even better then the first one (which I loved btw), I know you anticipated that it wouldn’t have been full done, but I still wished the animation and the coloring were completed, like the first short. Nevertheless It has its charm anyway so good job, still amazing as always ! I just wanted to ask a few questions about Mephistopheles:
1) Is Mephistopheles actually capable of being evil and doing evil things as well ? Is he the type of guy that is usually pretty chill but can get REALLY angry if you piss him off? At the end of the first act, he said to Sock that he would fired him if he didn’t complete the job… did he mean literally “to fire him” (like burn or hurt him), or just meant “fired from the job” without causing him any harm? I am very curious about this character, I find him pretty charming and interesting! (I also love his character design)
2) How long will it be before the second and third parts of W2H2 release more or less (Months, years…)? And how long each part will be? Don’t wanna put preassure on you ofc , I’m just curious but I will be patient if that’s the case!
Thank you for this amazing little cartoon! I really love the plot and the characters and I look foward to see more! I hope you’ll reply soon and thank u again <33 (also sorry for my bad english but I am Italian eheh)
haha... yeah I'm getting that comment from a lot of people. But idk, when I look at the first short it looks pretty incomplete to me! Like to me, I think having better animation and less color is a decent trade-off, but I guess for a lot of people the color really did a lot of heavy-lifting. Anyway, I know it's a little disappointing, but my options were "call it good enough and post it", or "drive myself crazy working on it until I die", I know that sounds dramatic, and maybe I could've forced myself to finish at least throwing color on it, but I don't know, I didn't want to start resenting the thing I'm supposed to be passionate about. I kinda put myself between a rock and a hard place, didn't I? Sorry for the rant! I'm glad you enjoyed it anyway, haha. UHHH on to questions! 1. Mephistopheles is complicated. Or at least, I think he is, and I'm trying to figure out what that balance is. (I have an entire wordpad file full of notes/thoughts on Mephistopheles from one of my friends who's given a surprising amount of thought to the morality of the character that I'm gonna have to reference moving forward, haha). But as for my original thoughts on the character--- I don't consider him evil, but I think he's capable of doing things we would call 'evil', just like any human is. And like humans, he can be motivated by flawed, negative thoughts and feelings; spite, revenge, jealousy, whatever. But unlike humans he exists outside of space and time, and he's not a human himself, so his perception of morality is just different. The "you're fired" comment is meant to be a little confusing... like, you come to expect these stupid hell jokes from him, but then he clarifies "that wasn't a pun". And he's the devil, so maybe he's not joking. He COULD condemn Sock to hell. So that's the stakes of the story! If Meph is serious, Sock could be in a lot of trouble. We're not sure exactly how lenient he's going to be, or how trust-worthy he is. He's the devil! Toying with people is kind of his whole thing! haha. 2. It's not gonna' be another 10 years, that's for sure!!! Most of Part 2 is already rough animated (at least as much as Part 1 has been). There's still... one or two scenes that need more animation, and pretty much every shot of Shadow!Jonathan still needs to be done. It also needs more backgrounds, but there's FEWER backgrounds in Part 2 (Hell is just a re-usable Shadow-Realmy-y void), and a lot of the stuff from Jonathan's house can be re-used with different lighting. I'll have a better idea of the timeline once I sit down and crack it open again... and it's about to get kind of busy with the holidays and all, but it should be finished some time next year! Hopefully in the first half of 2025! I'll try to keep everyone posted. Anyway thanks for your questions! Hope this helped!
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