#i felt so bad looking at him 😭 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yakny · 1 year ago

Text

ERROR! THIS OPERATING SYSTEM DOES NOT SUPPORT OLDER VERSIONS OF 'SELF'.

#colored explorations‚ studies‚ and experiments #colored doodles #sonic #metal sonic #ah! started this on 09/30/2023 and was finished with the metals BUT! the white negative space around him‚ man 😔.#just felt so unfinished to me. i tend to avoid it like i avoid stray flying roaches in the subways. so...!#i filled it up with words‚ knight metal sonic and‚ some airplane engines??? i think??? (a mech drawing practice sesh essentially. oh well.)#always feel bad bullshitting my way through machinery drawings cause im always worried someone who ACTUALLY knows about them looks at them #the way someone who knows biology would and goes: huh... why the hell is the stomach and brain bound together by an artery vein 😭#anyways... carry on.

884 notes · View notes

adustoflove · 1 month ago

Text

I always think well if I dated a man, I wouldn't feel as insane. I wouldn't feel so awful or jealous. And then I remember why I came to the conclusion that I'm a lesbian. I just wouldn't care if it were a man. I just can't bring myself to care about men like that 😔😩😭

#personal #I've definitely been like oh hes paying attention to another girl thats a shame :((( about it like damn you were supposed to pine for me #forever and ever #but its never like I'm going to kill someone over it. I don't feel sick about it. I don't feel bone crushing sorrow #😭😔#but I feel like maybe I experience comphet a tad? because I look at cute couples like jenna and julien #or jessi and ty and wish to have that. like i want what they have so bad but also that will never be me because im gay #i wish there was more lesbian and gay rep in media #god does not LIKE ME . he said here is. bad parents who hate you. here is bpd and other undiagnosed issues #and other undiagnosed issues that were probably half the reason you felt so isolated in your high school experience. thanks to bad parents #here is 🩷 COMPHET!!!!!!!!!!@@ you're actually GAY and those boys you were crazy for? yeah . they were cute and all but thats IT #NO emotional connection!!!! none at ALL!!!!! 😍😍😍 you also don't feel sexually attracted to them either ♡#but what DO i feel for men?? just comphet? I feel something I think but its not love. its not a craving . its like #I want to be worshipped by a man and then tell him no 🩷 i want nothing to do with you but you should like me actually #??????????????????#does that make me a bad person? do I care if it does? I mean

51 notes · View notes

zaharacrossing · 5 months ago

Text

Me: *wonders if I'm a Truly Bad Person*

Also me: *feels extreme guilt and heartbreak because I accidentally made Sherb mad at me*

10 notes · View notes

braceletofteeth · 6 months ago

Text

If you want to be happy, I hope it comes true.

I hope you will be happy too.

#ploy's yearbook #1x10 #jaochan #pongtawan dejdamrong #kapook ploynira #joong archen #gifset #*#//#congratulations on the divorce 🎉#this was one of the most BEAUTIFUL break-ups I have ever seen everybody SHUT UP 😭#they have so much maturity and respect for each other #it didn't work between them because of xyz (Tawan sacrificing his life and dreams for his family/previous lover)#and the only reason she was still by his side was because he was afraid of being alone with no purpose #but none of them deserves to live like this. they deserve to be happy.#to keep Jao tied to him when there is no more love between them is a selfish thing to do #she finally tells him that. they need to move on and Tawan is holding them back. they deserve better than this.#///#side note #it's in moments like this that I really appreciate the process of growing up‚ learning‚ and changing ideas/beliefs #younger me would probably have been offended by the idea that love can expire #or at very least looked down on a love that ends for not being strong enough to perdure #but the thing is #sometimes the love is there and the love is strong and the love lasts for a long time #and the love still expires. it becomes something else. or it doesn't become anything. it just stops.#and to insist that it should continue to validate the love you felt before is disrespectful to your past self #it's gone now‚ but it was there before. it was as real as the love that doesn't stop growing.#love may not last forever but every bond we create with another person leaves a mark‚ and the mark does.#the experience and how it influenced us. the memories‚ the good and the bad ones‚ all of it‚ is ours. it doesn't expire until we do.

10 notes · View notes

the-lark-ascending69 · 7 months ago

Text

> be a robin buckley fan

> be lesbian

> project on robin

> look up "internalized homophobia robin buckley" on tumblr because it's cathartic

> 3/4 of the posts are about st3ddie or just about steve

#saw one in which steve was like ''no robin you don't understand! i have never been loved! i don't know how that feels like!''#i have several grips about that interpretation #going from the fact that's not true (dustin is clearly a big steve fan + robin herself cares about him deeply)#to the fact he probably wouldn't be introspective enough to voice his emotions this concisely not to mention he'd probably wouldn't take #a moment to realize he's never felt loved if that were the case. i mean. he could think that. when he's like 35 and more in touch with his #inner world. 19yo steve can't even get the hint that hitting on a girl who's already clearly taken (nancy) is wrong so like i don't expect #him to be that smart #but i can live with people having takes i don't agree with. my opinion doesn't have to be everyone else's opinion if you see steve that way #it fine #what bothered me was the fact he was saying this to a lesbian living in the 80s lmao #who tells him that 1) her whole life has been an error 2) she doesn't think he'd want to be close to her if he truly knew her and 3)#3) is paralyzed by fear of social suicide if she dares believe for even a second that the girl she likes may like her too #like i dont need people to do deep dives into robin lore and quote from memory lines from Surviving Hawkins abt robin feeling like she's #rotten inside. not supposed to have friends. feeling like something is wrong with her and that pushes people away etc etc #the fact that she's a lesbian should tell you enough abt who has the biggest chances of being loved 😭#also bothered me that it showed up when looking up posts abt internalized homophobia because?? where's the internalized homophobia therw #unless it's gay steve feeling bad abt it in an AU (as if canon robin didn't go through it)#like look im not bothered to find steve-centric content in the robin tag cos people are gonna tag her in posts mentioning her.#she's his friend.#but there are barely any posts at all about robin's internalized homophobia. like i saw 2 or 3. compared to all the steve or steddie ones #where's the love for my babygirl 😭😭#anti steddie #not really but y'know i don't wanna bother anyone #edit: the bit about there being like 3 posts on robin w internalized homophobia isn't exactly true. there are a few. but they still feel #drowned in st3ddie posts #like something isn't right here

11 notes · View notes

tojisun · 5 months ago

Note

hi sorry I'm stupid but are you rooting for the oilers or not in your last two posts I legit cannot tell (they're my hometown team and I'm not into hockey but I am into your writing and honestly I'm just wondering)

hi omg no sweat and ur not stupid, the fault’s entirely mine bc my hockey lb is extremely confusing! i am rooting for the oilers yea!! im first and foremost a canucks fan (theyre my hometown team) but i kept watching the playoffs and began to like the oilers seriously (its just. davo is so endearing. its kinda difficult to dislike a guy whose love for the sport is just so honest). that said, ive also been watching the eastern conference games so my awe for the panthers is tremendous bc theyre legit beasts

i rambled again but tl;dr is yea im rooting for the oilers 😭

take care my love and smooches <33

#anon #ask #suns net #only ever rooted for canucks tbh LMAO but davo kept popping up in my feed #(davo as in mcdavid)#and so i began to look into the guy (bc i can gen feel my dislike bloating and i didnt wanna entertain it bc i just wanna enjoy the game yk)#and jesus davo is. wow. i cant even begin to get into how fucking astounded ive become #my heartstrings were tugged the moment i found out two pivotal facts about davo’s start in the nhl:#1) he was drafted into the oilers bc they for REAL wanted him to save the struggling team. hockey is a team sport yea but davo was honest #to god some metaphor for a messiah and so until now hes been carrying these old-age expectations and pressure #2) he is the youngest permanent nhl captain in history - he was 19 years old at the time #and something about those made davo so much more.. human (?) to me #like cmon dude as a canucks fan? all we ever see was the overt favouritism to davo bc hes a living legend! it was exhausting! but then i saw #what that title really entailed and i felt bad for even disliking him sm when poor guy’s just tryna make his team win 😭#…this is so not me oikawa-fying davo

9 notes · View notes

minimoniii · 1 year ago

Text

and they’re boyfriends

#oppenheimer #lawrenheimer #i just made that name up 💅 let’s get this ship sailing #IDK how to explain it but the CHEMISTRY they had #it was unbearable i felt like i was choking on air when they were close to each other #so good. literal art #wait sit down let me convince you to ship them!!#personally i shipped them from the first moment but the scene that is really precious for me is that one #when Izzy and Oppenheimer are sitting in the hallway and you see Lawrence walk in and then immediately leave when he sees them #cause like. you KNOW he came there to give a NEGATIVE ass review but then he saw Oppenheimer sitting there looking all defeated #and he just couldn’t do it #and i especially think of that scene in contrast to the discussion on Kitty’s testimony #since both of these scenes occur in the hallway some fake-deep analysis is necessary #it’s like 🤌🤌 Lawrence protected Oppenheimer with his silence the way Kitty protected him with her testimony #sort of a way to hold onto his morals while letting Oppenheimer go just out of sentimentalism #(my bad theory is that Lawrence was HURT by the knowledge of the affair w Ruth because it meant he wasn’t the only one 🤫)#(GOD i can just picture their relationship it would be so MESSY)#(Lawrence hopelessly in love. Oppenheimer being well aware and just using him for his body. Lawrence who can never refuse him anything.)#(wait did this turn into a foil for the relationship with Jean???? but with the roles reversed??????)#also?? irl Lawrence DID testify against Oppenheimer and ripped him to shreds (😭) so like. we know what movie!Lawrence protected him from #ohh and what i also find really interesting is the parallels with Kitty since off the top of my head there’s 2 more #the fact that Oppenheimer takes Lawrence to New Mexico as he did with Kitty later #and the fact that Lawrence encourages Oppenheimer to be ambitious and take the opportunity w the project #(and iirc it’s his words that finally convince Oppenheimer?)#anyway that was my dissertation on why you should ship them; if you aren’t convinced then i hope i’ve at least made you mad 😴

41 notes · View notes

strangerhands · 8 months ago

Text

mmmmm heyyy👁️. ive basically been gone from tumblr for over two days because ive been feeling like a shitty piece of shit. BUT. i finally saw dune part 2 and ohmygoddddd it was so so good. but yes. i was missing leto so bad the entire time. Father come back pls. i need you.

#it was so good tho #like so cool i was internally freaking out about how cool things looked #the fight scenes🤌#the environments/settings🤌#all of the fuckin machinery🤌#the acting🤌#the everything🤌#yum #also i dont find austin butler attractive but funnily enough feyd was the only time ive found him hot😭 yes i have issues. but like. okayyy..#i watched it alone and i wish doing things alone wasnt seen as such a weird or sad thing like. theres nothing wrong with it #sorta vent->#but basically ive been feeling like an annoying piece of shit so ive been staying off of here for the most part #because ive been convincing myself no one likes me and everyone in my life would be better off without me😝😝#just tee bee ehch #and idk i was just feeling like ass and was doing nothing and when i finally would go to use tumblr i was already too tired to do shit #so i just went to sleep #and i was busy today #yesterday*#and ill probably be a bit busy today too but idk maybe hopefully ill catch up a bit #idk ya boys just been hating himself like usual but not as usual bc it was worse but it is what it is #i felt a bit better yesterday though #and also my new antidepressants ive been on havent been doing shit for me so im going back to a previous one i used to be on so yea #hopefully that helps soonish idk #i never vent on here so i feel kinda bad for doing so but i just wanted to puke my thoughts here #also since im already here complaining ive just like. not written at allllllll basically like i got into my head and made myself discouraged #so. that sucks. but also nothing out of the ordinary there #why does Everything i say sound so embarrassingly depressing and pathetic hhhhhhhgggggggggggggghhhghghg #anyways yea i was doing bad im still not doing good but hopefully will be a bit better so ill be back and caught up later today or tomorrow #idk if anyone gave a fuck or noticed but i just like complaining into the void so yea #talkin shit

8 notes · View notes

bangcakes · 11 months ago

Text

.

#personal #ladies... its lovesickness on the menu again tn NDNNDNDNDMDMDNDMDMDMDM #god help me #i made it like 29 years without this. why now NFNDNDNNDNDNDNDMD #like ok im happy to be experiencing this in the sense that like... now ik what it feels like to really like someone #but man oh man is it... A Lot #and like maybe its this intense at any age. but idk..... it feels like So Much.....#and im freaking out bc i talk to my mom about it ok. and shes like oh ya that reminds me of how i felt with ur dad in the beginning n im #just... like ... o #bc my parents were like friends first and are like in Love love and have a v happy marriage so im just #the... Potential of having that n like oh god idk. i just dont know its all too much......#and im also like what if its all in my head. but then again like why is he waiting around for me n messaging me out of the blue.#i also caught him staring at me n looking away after i caught him. i just..... idk like i wanna Believe so bad but im so scared too........#im all over the place JDJDDMDMDMDMDMDMDNJDND #but i also am just..... i'll be patient .... bc rushing is no good #like idk. i feel like things have been Moving. and its not super fast but its a pace i can handle #bc ok say i Do ask him out or he asks me.... then oh fuck. then all the Scary things happen. like ok not scary #i dint think itd be scary with him #but idk.... physical... things. would start happening n like. id l9ve to hold his hand n like k___ him ok OK. but at the same time i just..#idk !!!!!!! im v shy !!!!!@@@@@ and ya. ....... idk 😭😭😭#like i like him so much that i think id want him to .... i just .. ya idk.#getting kind of ahead of myself here but what else is new

11 notes · View notes

tariah23 · 1 month ago

Text

I always feel bad whenever ppl qrt artists to complain about how they drew something (mainly if it’s harmless) and it goes viral so ppl just start piling onto their shit like crazy to the point of harassment. It’s not that hard to simply ignore it if you don’t like itsjsjs…

#they did this to a jjk artist the other day 😭…#because the person drew middle aged Gojo but he ended up just looking like a generic white man no shade 😭#I saw it before the qrt and was like ‘who’s white husband is this-‘ and kept scrolling but then I saw it go viral for ppl making fun of it #and felt bad 👎🏾#about of artists who tend to have semi realistic styles always end up making the obviously Japanese anime character #look like some white person and it’s kind of funny to me but I wouldn’t just add on to the pile on either #as an artist #stuff like this doesn’t sit right with me so I’d never even if I agree to an extent but I just felt bad for them is all #i actually sketched up some middle aged Gojo doodles about a month or so ago actually 🙈#I have a doodle of him crying about grey hairs and Shoko looking at him like 🧍🏾‍♀️? I guess he could easily tell his natural hair color apar #from his grey hair huh…. it’s silly #ijichi is of course beautiful at the ripe age of 53 or so…. Gojo is 55 and they’re married with a daughter 🏃🏾‍♀️❤️❤️❤️#Gojo tires to pose and act like a young man still and it makes Ijichi laugh at him still trying to cling on to his youth #😅#sorry for being ugly omg #rambling

2 notes · View notes

lususnatura · 3 months ago

Text

blamore being obsessed with just... casually running his hands across it's partner's skin if they are human, or at least humanoid in nature during their downtime, because the only skin that has really been 'untainted' in his mind by his transformation was on his face and on his back — so knowing what it feels like to have it again in a way almost makes blamore fascinated with them and that's just JSJSJ

#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#MAN IS BOUND TO LIE ABOUT HIMSELF: headcanons.#ALL DARK ALL BLOODY MY HEART: character study.#yeah IDK if i've talked about it all that much before buttt blamore had really bad body dysphoria when he first transformed for a while-#and didn't engage in anything even remotely romantic / didn't want people looking at it during that time so. I feel as if those feelings-#didn't completely go away just because they were so powerful in the beginning for it unfortunately 😭 though it's much more manageable-#for it to 'deal with' i guess you could say because blamore has become partially okay with how he looks like now. but that doesn't mean-#that he will not take any chance he can get to almost know what it feels like to be 'normal' again if it's partner is okay with it touching-#them and as a result being physically affectionate with blamore if your muse is in a relationship with him is very important NGL

4 notes · View notes

mariemariemaria · 3 months ago

Text

i feel kinda crazy bc whenever i was a teenager i created this sorta imaginary older big sister who had moved out of the house so in my head i could live w her whenever i wanted bc she had survived it all and was independent and she would also just comfort me in a big sisterly way whenever something bad or upsetting happened and recently ive been going back to that at my big age 😭 and its kinda sad and also just wish fulfillment and also kinda scary bc i really used to think that by my age i'd have everything sorted but i really don't and i know that's normal and nobodies twenties are perfect but some people also have good relationships w their fathers which is crazy just to think about sooo