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thestarlightforge · 10 months

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TBOSAS Meta

This started as a couple-paragraphs-long Everlark & Coryo x Lucy Gray rant. It turned into an essay on the politics of systemic oppression and how we illustrate it in fiction, with The Hunger Games and Ballad as case studies. Regardless, I hope others enjoy, lol. This is where my brain lives, now, as I expect it will the rest of 2023. Cheers!

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It’s been interesting, the last few days, some of the discourse that’s popped up around TBOSAS. FASCINATING political discussions, as I’ve come to expect for a Suzanne Collins release. (#1 in my heart.)

Personally, I always separate books vs. movie canon with her franchise. With the OG Hunger Games, sometimes I felt the films were better—like she got another pass at it and REALLY took advantage, and utilized the hell out of taking it out of Katniss’s first-person POV to develop other characters and the world (still without detracting from her narrative)—while for some details, I preferred the books.

With TBOSAS, though, the book and movie feel almost entirely different to me.

There are MANY shared elements, of course, and I feel either version gels quite nicely with the OG franchise. It’s not even that there’s that many continuity differences—some things cut or altered for time, sure, but the bones of the plot are the same. Both illustrate astute political commentary, Coriolanus’s descent into madness, Tigris’s shift in position on him (foreshadowing her full turn by Mockingjay), and Lucy Gray’s role in his life in both his initial downfall and his defeat by Katniss. The actors and creative team all did BEAUTIFUL work bringing it to life, and I honestly love both versions.

But fans who mainly like the book may be frustrated by the sympathy Coryo garners in the film.

Normally, I’d say this is because the book reveals more internal monologue—and it does. But honestly, one of the things I was most impressed by in this film was how legible the actors’ internal monologues were. It was clear, the amount of work they all did to that end. So I don’t know that it is just more. I think it’s also different.

Book Coriolanus devolves much earlier and more obviously. He starts from the same pressed circumstances and has moments of goodness, but he becomes the villain we know him eventually to be pretty damn fast.

Film-Coriolanus has a much slower descent. Ironic, honestly, given the film has far less time than the book does.

I think as a result of this, I’ve seen discourse comparing beats in his relationship with Lucy Gray to Katniss and Peeta. For example, that beautifully shot/choreographed/performed scene in TBOSAS with him and Lucy Gray on either side of the fence after the bombings that night, where they almost kiss and he asks her, “Is this real? If I’m going to risk everything?” being compared to Peeta’s long game of “real or not real” throughout Mockingjay. Everlark folks (rightfully) pointing out that for Peeta, the refrain is about shared trauma, especially between him and Katniss, and both of them grounding their relationship in mutual trust—while asserting that for Coryo, the same refrain comes from a place of selfishness.

I get where this opinion comes from: President Snow is probably one of the most violent, sadistic, genocidal dictators in modern popular fiction. His relationship with Lucy Gray started as transactional—even more acutely in the book. Nearly everything Book-Coryo does is for his or his family’s personal gain.

But to me, half the beauty and tragedy of the film is this delicious possibility—the hope—they showed us.

THG has always had a strong anti-war philosophy in general, with through-line commentary on showmanship, propaganda, surveillance and performance: The recurrent themes of cameras always bring on them, the arenas and entirety of Panem being a stage/game—and how those things impact authentic human relationships. Everlark hit for so many because of the ways authenticity bloomed out of that hellish, contrived pit. Coriolanus and Lucy Gray’s relationship started out similarly contrived: Thrown together by the politics of the Academy, the uprising, the districts, the Capitol and the Games—helping one another survive. Largely unlike Katniss and Peeta, they both played the game intentionally, to varying degrees. (Personality wise, these four really have almost nothing in common, lol.) Lucy Gray is a good person, both in the end and from her start (unlike the terrorist Coriolanus becomes). But she is a performer. He’s right about that.

So honestly, I don’t see much purpose in reading Peeta’s question as valid while Coryo’s wasn’t. I think that judgment is colored by dramatic irony—us knowing who they each become. But in theatre, we talk about living honestly in imagined circumstances. It’s used in a lot of acting techniques, but particularly for people playing villains. To stay grounded in the truth of it, you have to believe honestly in the imagined moment, not the gestalt; Leslie Odom Jr. was a great Aaron Burr because every performance, he believed in the whole journey, from hope to ruin. Tom Blythe was a great Coryo because he invested in the earnest reality of Snow as a young man, not the devil we know he becomes. And at that point in the story, at the cages that night with Lucy Gray, Coriolanus was honestly grounded in similar struggles as our OG heroes: Trying to provide for and protect his starving family. His family (and the Capitol at large) reeks of privilege, and his prejudices were obviously flawed. But in his developing love for her, he was steeped in starvation, the same political forces as lashed all citizens of Panem, and was clawing his way from beneath just as much Capitol propaganda as people from the Districts—perhaps even more so, given his Grandma’am and how his father died. Because of their given circumstances, politics bled into everything—but eventually, so did feeling, and they had several moments of genuine bonding, trust and connection which the actors invested in beyond their political need for each other. There’s a constant push and pull: Holding hands at the zoo for the cameras was political; her reaching for his hand in the arena visit was less so. The first “Stop treating me like I’ve already lost” in front of everyone was wit-soaked survival, while “Please don’t let me die in that arena tomorrow,” near-whispered and with hands held between them where the camera would struggle to see, bled into real vulnerability. Saving him from the other tributes in the cage-ride to the zoo was about survival; risking her life to go back for him when the arena was bombed was at least a mix. Her motivations for singing in her interview are complex—perhaps guilt that a “rebel” attack nearly killed Coriolanus, his advice she’d get the most money that way—but I feel strongly that a non-zero amount of her was motivated by wanting to demonstrate that she trusts him, which for her is even higher-prized than love. And I also feel that, after the hospital and her “final performance”—leading up to their near-kiss at the zoo—Coriolanus scoped out the arena (and ultimately took all those risks to help her cheat the Games) both because he wanted the Plinth prize, in theory, and because he increasingly desperately wanted her to live.

The waters between them were thoroughly, legitimately muddied—which I believe was intentional, that constant tension between authenticity and politics. And as much as he was falling for her, Coriolanus saw that Lucy Gray was just as clever and good at crowd-work as he was—maybe better.

So to circle all the way back to this Everlark comparison: Given the absurdly multilayered situation, is it really that selfish or unreasonable he would check in with her during that moment through the fence? That this child—wrapped in oppressive patriarchy, violence, starvation and propaganda—would ask for reassurance before he was willing to be vulnerable, or to potentially risk his family’s lives?

Some artists are hesitant to engage with the humanity of “villains,” their origins, because they feel humanizing them excuses them. In real life, I get this: Second chances aren’t always the answer, and people need to be held accountable. But isn’t it more powerful storytelling to demonstrate the corrosive nature of all systems of oppression in our fiction, to show how they can corrupt even those who try, than to condemn people before they’ve even had a chance? Isn’t the beauty of Lucy Gray’s whole thing that everyone starts out good, and it’s our job to choose to stay on the right side of that line?

And when President Coriolanus Snow finally chokes on his last rose, wouldn’t it be a more satisfying victory if we imagined him as a real-feeling person—full owner of sixty years of horrifying choices—rather than a cartoonishly evil cardboard cutout?

Book-Coryo has a more obviously manipulative/evil streak, much earlier on. To make it plain: He’s an ass, and his “love” for her reads more like obsession. But my favorite aspect of the film (and I feel one of the most compelling) was how it illustrated that these systems of oppression can make tragedies of almost anyone: All but those at the very, very top. Suzanne’s anti-capitalist politicking—how classism turns everyone below the 1% against each other, where the “upper middle class” (doctors/lawyers/actors) is vilified to the poor as a red herring while a handful of robber-baron CEOs amass almost all wealth on the planet—strikes again. She, Francis Lawrence, the film’s creative team and these actors came together to put tragically human faces on that struggle—how hard it is to stay a good person amidst intense, violent, systemic oppression.

But none of that sings quite as true if you go into it having decided that Coriolanus was evil in his bones. The stakes are so much higher, richer, otherwise. If his love—for Tigris, for his family, for Sejanus, and yes, for Lucy Gray—was, or became, authentic.

It’s not a descent into madness if he’s already mad. Or, as he put it in the original Hunger Games film: “Hope. It is the only thing stronger than fear.”

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waitmyturtles · 7 days

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Hot Take: Be On Cloud and Sammon out GMMTV-ed GMMTV with that lame-ass 4 Minutes finale

(TW: Ummm, this ended up being a rant, so don't read this if you enjoyed that finale.)

WOW.

This is not the central thesis of this post at all, but I need to get this off my chest, FIRST OF AWL: GET AN ORIGINAL OST. WOW.

LIKE, ACTUALLY, I want to not get into this, but I actually need to talk about this for a second. ICONIC OSTs like, SAY, "Why Don't You Stay" or "Just Friend" (OR THE DARK BLUE KISS THEME SONG, THE BEST ONE) are meant to invoke THE SHOW FROM WHICH THAT SONG HAILS, AND THE FEELINGS THAT THAT PARTICULAR SHOW MADE ONE FEEL. WHAT THE FUCK WAS 4 MINUTES THINKING?! THIS SHOW WAS NOT KINNPORSCHE. NOT AT ALL. I FELT NO KP FROM 4 MINUTES. I hope Jeff Satur sues BOC for copyright infringement. ANYWAY.

I mean, this is gonna be messy, but in yet another case of shippy roooooomance, a kind of rooooomance that's supposed to leave us feeling like the central couple is worth redeeming against both the obstacles that the story gives them, AND/OR a weak script as well (I wrote about this recently during a rewatch of The Eclipse), I mean, BOC and Sammon just threw an otherwise really amazing storyline to the dogs.

We were supposed to get a lot of moral and ethical loops closed here. I would have been okay with a Ton Kla redemption! I would have been okay with Korn living the rest of his life in pain and suffering for neglecting Ton Kla! Instead, they're both "redeemed" by their own deaths?! I get Win being upset, but Win, you knew who you were sleeping with! Come awn!

AND. I'm supposed to believe that Great is worth redemption because he threw a corrupt government minister under the bus and prevented his parents from coming back to Thailand, while we see him walking away from a woman having a heart attack???? Like, THAT'S NOT GOOD!!!! He's had a messy life, but he's not necessarily a good person, folks!!! HELLO!!! "He's a good person?!" TYME?? Like, Great's hot, BUT LIKE, DON'T BE LIKE THAT, TYME, GURL, ACTUALLY LOOK THRU AT WHO YOU'RE DATING.

ALSO, TYME, HIPPOCRATIC OATH, DUDE. I KNOW YOU WANT THAT GUY DEAD, AND HE DESERVES BAD THINGS, BUT YOU CAN'T MAIM HIM PURPOSELY, HOMEY, YOU'RE ABOUT TO BECOME A PROFESSOR.

And LIKE, WHAT THE FUCK, putting a whole new story point about Warit's kidnapping from some dude named Wanchai who we don't even know, and finding out that Warit is a general?!?! It was JUST CONFUSING.

Also, Den dating a patient. I know medical ethics are probably different in Thailand, but they cannot be THAT DIFFERENT, friends, they can't (right? right?).

And. Finally. TYME GOT SHOT MULTIPLE TIMES IN THE CHEST AREA. He survived after two months of recovery?! HE SURVIVED POINT-BLANK SHOOTING?!?!?!??!?!?! AND GREAT SURVIVED HIS POINT-BLANK SHOOTING, TOO?!?!?!?!

LISTEN. LISTEN. I get that BOC wants GreatTyme together. JesBible are a good pair. It's fine Great and Tyme are together. It's nice.

But there was an ACTUAL storyline, told WONDERFULLY for seven episodes, that had these characters in moral and ethical chokeholds that could have received different and very much more appropriate endings. This is fiction, of course, but the moral and ethical prisons these characters were in were very real-to-life by way of what humans value, and how you balance those values against the real-time decisions that humans need to make for themselves and their families.

Instead, BOC took the wild GMMTV playbook of late (The Eclipse, 23.5, Only Friends, Wandee Goodday, even Last Twilight and My Precious) and just railroaded ethical explorations for, my GAWD, guitars and boats. GUITARS AND BOATS! If either Great or Tyme had died, how would the story have expressed regret, uncommunicated feelings, unsolved mysteries?

The ending sucked the mystery out of this series, and frankly, made light of the fact that we were not in a Series Y for seven-eighths of a runtime, only to truly suck us back into Y territory -- real, sugary, cheesy Y territory, GUITARS, THE KP OST OMG -- that just clashed with the tonality of what was shaping up to be a great queer crime murder mystery show. GMMTV already does this. BOC did not need to go there.

Funny that some of us are watching Kidnap now, and commenting (I'm stealing @shortpplfedup's words here) that Kidnap is not a crime BL, but a crime BL. Kidnap knows what it is: it is shaping up to be a fun, unserious Y series that's centered around two himbos not really understanding the consequences of their decisions, and being googly while doing it. It seems to be taking its unseriousness seriously. Good on GMMTV for taking initiative there.

4 Minutes? 4 Minutes needs moral closure, not sappy romance. I could have used a hint that we were gonna get punked earlier. I wouldn't have taken this show as seriously as I did if I had known otherwise.

#4 minutes #4 minutes the series #jesbible #jes jespipat #bible wichapas #greattyme #great x tyme #tyme x great #WOW

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nnnyxie · 11 months

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I‘m bAaAaAck

One other thing I’m an absolute sucker for is comfort🫶🏻 So imagine jealous!izu x reader

jealous!Itzu would probably just become quiet and insecure and withdraw himself from reader if it‘s extremely bad…in the begingen he‘d step closer…hold reader just a little bit tighter

Poor boy gets so nervous he just starts spewing random facts about reader to prove he knows reader better, like

„Did you know when you smile you have a dimple on your right but not on your left cheek?? And your nose crinkles right there *he taps readers face* and and your eyes squint and your cheeks go all rosy and-„

poor baby is just a stammering mess :(

reassure and love him :c

#𖢥 izuku anon

JEALOUS IZU!!!!!!!!!!

thank you izuku anon omg

i feel like izuku isn’t the type to get jealous easily, yk??

not unless he feels ‘threatened’

he’s not the type to like,,, ‘puff out his chest’ and ‘mean mug’ the person but— he is the type to hold some part of you. maybe your hip?? or put an arm around your shoulder??

though— there are times where he gets a bit insecure,,, so he just leaves.

he only stops when you say his name and ask where he’s going. he mumbles an ‘i don’t feel good’ and you cut the conversation with the person.

“you didn’t have to do that. you can go keep talking to them.” “no, you said you didn’t feel good so we’re going home.”

he sighed, now he felt guilty. he let his jealousy get in the way of your conversation.

when you reach home, he airs it all out. he tells you that he felt jealous, and that he feels guilty for making you leave when you were having fun. he told you how he felt like he was being a bad boyfriend for acting and feeling like that.

you tell him you were glad he told you the truth instead of keeping that lie and that you’re happy he’s able to communicate this all to you!! (we are all abt communication here folks!!)

“jealousy is a natural emotion and it’s something everyone experiences. i’m glad you told me. do you want to assess the situation?” he gives a nod. “okay, could you tell me why you felt jealous?” “i guess i just thought that they were… you know… more interesting and… i dunno, better? than me… and i got insecure about it…” you gave an understanding nod, “it’s okay that you felt that way izuku, your feelings are valid. but, please, never think that for one second, there’s someone better or more interesting than you.”

you laughed a little, “after all, you had to eat hair to get to where you’re at. i believe that’s the most interesting thing i’ve heard in my life.”

the talk went on for a bit, you discussed the times you had gotten jealous as well, and discussed any insecurities you both felt.

it was a very relieving and reassuring conversation, on both ends.

but yk he’s still gonna feel jealous from time to time.

again, it’s a natural emotion! even animals get jealous!!! especially house pets, they’re very territorial.

with that reassuring talk, he’s doesn’t really withdraw anymore. instead, he makes direct eye contact with the person. not necessarily trying to intimidate them but,,, more so to show he’s very aware of the conversation and what the person is trying to get at.

the only times he’ll ever get like,,, overly(???) jealous is when the person brings up old stuff about you that doesn’t really… align(??) with you anymore. to him, it feels like they’re tryna one up him. ykwim???

so then he’ll go on a cute tangent about how you don’t really like that kind of stuff anymore or you aren’t like that anymore. he’ll go on a rant about your new favorite things/activities and how you are now.

he’ll wave his hands around to emphasize his points, and when he’s trying to remember a thing you told him about a show/book/movie— he’ll begin to mumble into his hand. it’s very sweet but, you’ll have to stop him because, the person just ends up excusing themself— they were kinda off-put by him.

but, it’s okay!! that’s just another reason to love him!!

IZUKU <3

#mha x reader #bnha x reader #my hero academia x reader #boku no hero x reader #izuku x reader #deku x reader #midoriya x reader #izuku midoria x reader #/ᐠ - ˕ -マ works — ♡︎#♡︎ — izuku anon

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milk-ducts · 10 months

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[Brief] Thoughts on Film Theory's Analysis

I was gonna post this on my priv twt.. but moots convinced me to post it here so here we are.. beware of spoilers, gore, bla bla bla ..

FIRST OFF I'm gonna start by saying, I AM ESL. I may or may not have misinterpreted some of his words, but this is mainly how I thought of his analysis. This is not meant to be ill-guided or rude ! so sorry if it comes off as this way. I will be very repetitive.

Another thing, most if not all of the information matpat gave out i alr discussed with a few mutuals on discord about a few months back so this is not new territory to me 😭😭 I thought most folks would already knew the concept of how the brain deteriorates overtime But honestly, that indisposition shouldn’t even apply to omni man??? matpat tried to compare an immortal Viltrumite's psychology to that of an aging human's, which can be misguided.

Let's start by how he compares Nolan's brain to the average aging human's brain so the audience could understand his psyche more and how empathy declines overtime. First and foremost, Nolan is not a human, second; Nolan wasn't raised with empathy or around an empathetic environment - it was an alien concept to his race. Something frowned upon. He was raised from birth to conquer and destroy without remorse. His brain never developed those neural pathways for empathy in the first place. It's not that they deteriorated over time, they were never even formed.

By the time he came to Earth, all this familial stuff was new to him. Sure, he knew he was gonna outlive them, but He didn't think he'd get attached. HE didn't process that he'd grieve over them when the time came.

Interacting with humanity for the first time ignited unfamiliar emotions in Nolan that he didn’t know how to process.

His time living amongst humans caused conflicting feelings he’d never experienced in his centuries of systematic slaughter. Loving Debbie and Mark went against everything he was taught, but he couldn't help it. For once, the lives he was manipulating to further Viltrum’s goals meant something to him. He developed a [what he presumed, NOT what he felt about them in reality, his love for them is far more profound than he assumed it to be which we later on see in the last ep of s1 and the second season] petty facsimile of love for his ersatz family.

So no, his capacity for empathy didn't decline with age as MatPat claims. His empathy was stunted from the start. An underdeveloped skill, not a deteriorated one. We had characters like Debbie to help him understand those notions, help him grow it. With Mark in the mix? it only amplified that development.

Viltrumites are societally and culturally predisposed to violence and domination. Nolan was never accustomed to forming emotional connections or grieving loss. Those were entirely new experiences for him after arriving on Earth. He was not jaded. he was grown into jamais vu in viltrum.

This is why the whole conflict in s1 happened, he was treading between double lives he wasn't sure of. He was conflicted because his past values were refuting with his new experiences. He found love on Earth, he found himself unable to accept how he'd lose Debbie. Of How jaded Mark might become. Everything he said to Mark till that point was his own self-projections, his own fears, doubts.

While the video did provide some interesting facts about neuroscience and aging, the application of those facts to Nolan's character was inaccurate. IT is educational for those who don't know, but it isn't recent news that the brain begins to deteriorate overtime so this video wasn't that informative which kinda disappointed me. Their analysis lacked alot of information about the Viltrumite race and Nolan's character. Comparing him to humans with normal life experiences just doesn't work. His immortal nature combined with a lack of empathy from birth created a psychology unlike anything seen on Earth.

SORRY FOR RANTING ALOT AND OR IF IT SEEMS LIKE I'M GIVING MATPAT SHIT ... i really liked their analysis on immortal so i'll give them that. Immortal, unlike Nolan, was born human. He has lived among humanity for over 3000 years, inhabiting different identities of public and devoted historians. Because of this, his psyche developed quite differently. Immortal knows how to form connections, experience loss, and adapt to social changes. His perpetual existence didn't harden his heart like Viltrum's brutal culture did to Nolan. Instead, Immortal's immortality allowed his empathy and compassion to blossom.

Humans are social creatures. Our brains have evolved to seek out interpersonal relationships, crave affection, and find meaning in community. For an immortal like Immortal, social interaction is vital to staving off boredom, depression and detachment from humanity.

By inhabiting mortal lives, he stays tethered to the human experience. He continues learning, growing, and developing empathy.

This is why he's devastated when the guardians die.

This is also why he goes fucking mental and tries to kill Omni-man.

If Immortal had lived in isolation all this time, unable to connect with people, his psyche would likely resemble Nolan's more closely. Without social interaction, Immortal's brain would atrophy in ways that preclude complex emotions and moral reasoning. His sense of purpose would fade, achievements would lose meaning, and life itself might feel pointless. By engaging with humanity, Immortal gives his endless existence purpose and direction. He finds value in each temporary life, so loss still impacts him deeply. Socializing keeps his emotions and cognition flexible, which prevents the apathy and hardness of heart seen in Nolan. Nolan never had these opportunities in his early years, this is why it's more difficult for him to stray away from his indoctrination. It's that he's unused to it, underdeveloped.

60 years to Nolan would've been a year and a half, so what's 20 measly years on Earth for him? Yes, he found profound connections in that little speck of time, but Immortal's emotional capacity is far more extensive.

In summary, Comparing Nolan to a human, whether mortal or immortal, is kinda inaccurate. His Viltrumite psyche rules out him from possessing JADED human qualities. You could say he's desensitized to violence sure, but no.. unfortunately.. he does not have [boomer] brain. He has [indoctrinated alien-fascist brain]

Leave your own thoughts down below or through reblogs, I'm really interested on what others may think of this! (URGHHHNN... my hcs r slipping away from my fingers cuz now people r gonna accept what matpat says as truth.. someone gun me down from the hills..)

#ALSO my moots and I had all analyzed this vid and ironically enuff Matpat's analysis makes a hell of a lot more sense when applied to my OC #Aconite !! rather than her father nolan but i will discuss that in a separate post because ykno..#this may or may not have been the worst take in existence.. i am prepared to be called a dumbass.. (i am not. i am sensitive..)#it is so jover for me.. i will need to change identities..#invincible #omni man #mark grayson #omni man invincible #milky.txt #milkyrants #milkyrambles #invincible spoilers #nolan grayson #immortal invincible #ur honor omni man is cluster b coded and has ASD..#IDGAFFFFF !!!!! *i scream aloud in my padded white room rocking back and forth in a straitjacket*#i think alot of people tend to forget nolan is an alien . so let me quickly remind you .! HE IS AN ALIEN.

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pearl-likes-pi · 6 months

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i honestly dont know hoe to say this, but you really had a hand in shaping my brai chemistry while i was growing up, no kidding. i remember when i was 13 or so and whenever you posted a pearl rap career chapter it would unironicaly make my day (specially when you dropped the peridot chapter i had a stomach infection or smth, so that video and the last one out of beach city episode were on replay for me for a few days). its really weird seeing that rebecca managed to make a safe space for lgbt folks (it was really hard for me to accept myself as gay, it seems really simple nowadays but back then it was so discomforting to even thinm about it so su and its fandom, and by some extent, your vids, helped me externalize some feelings or queernes i guess, do you remeber when someone said your video editing was raw and masculine? lol). anyways, its wild to think i was in 5th grade when i first watched laser light canon and now im finishing my journalism course in college and seeing how this show raised me in some way and helped me to be aware of my own mental health i only have good memories, thankfully, and its really sad to see that it ended, but i honestly wouldnt have had it any other way. its kind of a long rant but id like to thank you, mackenzie, your videos made me laugh a lot when i was a teen and they still make me now. this show was truly a gift, it made us connect to something bigger and magical. this was kind of a long rant since ive kinda forgotten that su existed and remined that it existed because of some dreams lol. i remembered back then when i was super anxious about the cluster episode, i remeber checking your tumblr everyday and seeing fanon content. i really dont know how to express myself since english is not my first language and i tend to ramble on a lot on my native one, but id like to say youve made me smile a lot, it was so cool seeing you present the su podcast and being an intern at CN. i honestly wish you the best.

Dude it means so much to hear that my lil shitposts have had an impact on people!!!! I completely understand where youre coming from re: SU's impact on your life (and acceptance of queer identity) and feel the same way!!! im so grateful for this show and everything it represents. in a world without Steven Universe my current life would be completely unrecognizable. like genuinely I dont think any single aspect of my life would be the way it is without SU. which is nuts but it's true!!!

I love engaging with this community and it gave me a lot of support when I was at a place in my life where I felt pretty isolated. I'm kind of rambling now too but this seriously has been sitting in my inbox for a bit now and I just knew i needed to respond and say thank you for sharing. <3

ALSO LMAO I FORGOT ABT THE RAW AND MASCULINE COMMENT THANK YOU FOR REMINDING ME HAHA

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darth-prequelist · 28 days

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The acolyte is cancelled?!?

Excuse my french, but WTF. Honestly.

I suppose the whiny idiots on the internet won. Why can we not have nice things? Why can't you just let people enjoy a show?

It felt like Star Wars to me. And we rarely get any Sith shit at all and once we've got it...Boom its gone. Evil twin trope and seduction to the dark side (very literally)? Amazing. Wonderful fight scenes, compelling characters. I must say I was so invested in Sol and Osha's relationship, the twins, and Qimir and Osha's.

We were going to have Plagueis (maybe?)! And now he's gone. Osha's lightsaber turned crimson??? And we're simply left with THAT! No conclusion. NO NOTHING!

And the author, Headland, had a plan. A whole overarching storyline and now we're left with one season and more than a handful of unanswered questions.

This is why we can't have nice things. Because of those pesky whiny, loud fools on the internet. It disgusts me that they're cheering over the fact that its cancelled. If you don't want to watch it, don't. Let everyone else enjoy it who does want to watch it.

Don't shit on what other people like. Its disrespectful, its immature and its unbelievably uncool.

I'll admit it. I love everything Star Wars. Sequels and all. Flaws and all. The Acolyte had its flaws but even the Original Trilogy had its own. Example: Luke became attached to Obi-Wan within a day and become a Jedi within a few days. The end result: no one cares. But the second its a new show, everyone cares about every little mistake.

And I was rather excited to explore a world set in the High Republic. Now its gone. GONE GONE GONE! We've only seen it through books and through other media. I cannot tell you, I followed this show the second it was mentioned and announced. And the fact that its ending like this is so unbelievably frustrating.

Season 1 was for sure just a setup and I don't mind that but now that's its cancelled. Just...why. The children storyline was a bit annoying and there was for sure more to the story. Why did Torbin kill himself? There had to be more. There was so much guilt and I don't believe that's it. Something to be explored in Season 2 which will never happen.

One last thing. For the folks that like guys, we've lost Qimir. Right when Star Wars is beginning to consider people who like men, they pull it right out from under us. We had Leia in a bikini in the Originals which I could care less about. Plenty of Padme in the Prequels. A bit of Kylo Ren. And now, Qimir. The pinnacle of perfection, those arms were just...hot. I'll admit it.

And now because of the haters, there will be no more. No one hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. I'm going to end this rant now before it gets far too long. All in all: I can't believe it.

I truly wish I could do anything. Something to bring it back.

#star wars #the acolyte #the acolyte spoilers #osha aniseya #mae aniseya #sol the acolyte #qimir the acolyte #rant post #star wars rant

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runningpsychic · 6 months

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Why Goodbye Volcano High resonates with me as...

...a musician

As a musician, it's hard not to immediately identify with Fang. What musician doesn't want their music to be heard, to play at music festivals, and have music as their career. I can wax poetic about how music is about self expression and it doesn't matter if I have an audience, but in the end, I still want my music to be heard, and enjoyed. And Fang is on track to making this their entire career.

Making music has been a minor hobby for me. Even as a kid, I knew there's almost no chance I can make it as a musician, so I went down the route of being a software engineer instead. It's such a minor part of my life that I don't even bother identifying as a musician, I just fool around with instruments. But something about GVH ignited that passion in me, and during my first playthrough, I wrote six songs inspired by themes in the game. Even if I'll stay an amateur, I want to make the most from life, and not let the fire die. (See last section)

All that said, I felt very bad for Fang throughout the game. I know how tough the life of a full time musician is. The industry is just completely screwed. And unlike me, Fang doesn't have another option other than music. The game also drives it in that Fang's friends all have viable career paths, while Fang doesn't. But then, the meteor throws an interesting wrench into this, as now Fang is the only one who achieved their dreams. I'm not sure what the point of this paragraph is besides fuck capitalism, give musicians a living wage.

...an enby

Fang really made me more comfortable about being non-binary. It's amazing seeing enby representation that doesn't feel shoehorned in, or merely an afterthought. It's actually integral to the story. Both Fang and Sage struggle having their parents take their identities seriously, and that mirrors my own fears of not being taken seriously as an enby myself, which leads me to only come out as non-binary to my closest friends, and just remain a binary trans woman to everyone else.

It's honestly amazing to see everyone in Caldera Bay being accepting of the queer cast, like being queer isn't a big deal at all. And that's how it should be. Everyone just calls Fang by their name and pronouns (except their parents of course), and no one seems to mind that Reed brought Alvin to prom. This really makes me feel more comfortable about my identity, and I feel proud to be queer. We don't owe them normal.

...an immigrant

It's so rare to see stories about the intersection of being trans and being an immigrant, so when I read Rosa's story, I felt it must've been written by someone who also has first hand experience. There's a distinct feel from my family that me being trans is a "western" thing, not something they could ever understand. Or worse, that I'm being corrupted by "the west" in some way by moving there. There's so much extended family I can never see again because I'm now an abomination of the family tree.

I find it really difficult to talk about this as I fear I'd be misread as being racist for suggesting that my home country is more queerphobic or something, but that isn't my point. I just want to tell my story, and my experience of being alienated for both culture and gender, in both my origin and destination countries, is one that most folks can't emphasize with. (Venba also does do a good job with the culture part, so you should check that out too)

There's a separate rant about how this brand of queerphobia was actually planted by Christian missionaries and not at all "traditional culture", but that's for another time.

...someone struggling with mental health

I've been obsessed with the game for months since I played it. I went through what everyone calls "Dino depression", but I think it really helped me, and it was the game I needed to play at this moment in my life. I struggle with depression and burnout. At times it can be hard to know what the point is, or feel that any of this is worth it. The first few weeks after the game, I actually felt more depressed, as I thought about what the point of life is if it all is temporary anyway, and what I would do if a meteor were to hit in 8 months. And I was scared, because I felt like my life wasn't under my control. Over time, I've learned to think about it more positively. If life is temporary, then it's up to me to make the most of it. If life has no meaning, it's up to me to make my own meaning. I have amazing friends around me, and I still have tons of music to make.

#goodbye volcano high #gvh #transgender #nonbinary #musician #mental health #ko_op

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naeverse · 11 months

Text

Keep It In The Closet (Halloween Special)

💜 starring: Miguel O’Hara x Shy fem!reader

🍾 preview:

"I didn't know you had that kind of fire in you, Y/N. You always seemed so… timid," he said, his thumb caressing your side, sending a shiver down your spine and igniting a fire within you. "But tonight...

You've been all I’ve thought about."

😈 summary:

Miguel O'Hara finds himself being dragged to a Halloween party by his friend, Peter B. Parker. His disdain for the party quickly dissipates when he is drawn to a mysterious woman in a sleek leopard costume and captivating black mask that seems to move him in ways he'd never thought possible…

🍾 tw/cw: Unprotected sex, Sensory Deprivation, Wall sex, Fingering, Dirty talk, Semi-public sex, Standing, etc…

😈 Pet names: Bebè (Baby), Cariño (Darling), Muñeca (Doll), Gatita (Kitty), Hermosa (Beautiful)

💜rating: 18+ explicit I SMUT I

🍾Word Count: 7.1k

(Every character mentioned is of age!!)

😈Credit to artist in header: sylvaeon

Miguel let out another annoyed groan, his amber eyes rolling in irritation as he rode in the passenger seat beside his friend, Peter B. Parker.

"Come on, Miguel, don't be like that," Peter said, glancing over at the huge, tanned male beside him in the car while he drove. "I promise this party MJ and I are hosting is going to be worth it! Pinky promise!" He joked, even putting his pinky finger up and giving it a shake whilst turning his amber eyes to look at the road in front of them.

Miguel couldn't help but roll his eyes, feeling like he had done it a hundred times already. He muttered under his breath angrily, turning to look out the window, feeling sullen.

"Miguel, it's Halloween night! What were you going to do, huh? Stay cooped up in your office this whole time?"

"Yeah, actually," Miguel replied. The mere thought of spending an entire night among multiple Spider-people already made him feel claustrophobic.

"You know me, Peter. I don't do parties." Miguel growled, keeping his crimson gaze fixed on the window on his passenger side, taking in the many halloween decorations and trick-or-treaters that covered Peter's dimension, Earth-616.

Peter laughed. "I couldn't tell. You seemed pretty prepared, buddy."

Miguel snarled, his eyes glancing down at the outfit he had thoughtfully picked out.

He wore a scarlet, collared button-up shirt that was unbuttoned a few at the top, covered with a black blazer. His black formal slacks and leather oxfords dressed the bottom half of his outfit. To finish the look, he had added some gold jewelry. Golden bands of different sizes and shapes adorned his fingers, and a chain was worn around his neck, accentuating his bronze, defined collarbones and thick throat.

"Shut up and drive," Miguel snarled, earning another laugh from Peter. "Okay, fine, but I promise you, Miguel. When you leave this party tonight, you'll be thankful I dragged you there..."

Miguel sighed, heavily doubting Peter's words.

Miguel felt a huge wave of dread hit him as soon as Peter arrived at the penthouse he rented for his party.

“I can’t have alcohol and drunken spider folk around my baby, Miguel. I have a family now!”

Miguel vividly remembering him rant when he asked the simple question of why a penthouse out of everything.

Miguel let out another heavy exhale, his dark brown eyes wandering the party from the safety of the passenger seat, trying his best to get the lay of the land. He cursed once more under his breath when he turned over to Peter’s side of the car to see a scary clown staring back at him.

“BOO!”

Peter exclaimed, causing only an unfazed grunt to escape Miguel’s lips. “What the fuck are you doing?” Miguel asked nonchalantly, his eyes narrowing in confusion and annoyance. Peter groaned in frustration, pulling the mask up from over his face. “You are no fun Miguel. You could at least pretend to be scared.” Miguel rolled his eyes, his arms crossing over his broad chest. “Why? You look more ridiculous than scary.”

Peter snickered, pulling his mask off to take a look at the clown covering before placing it back onto his head. “Yeah, yeah. To you maybe. This mask looks pretty sick to me.” He laughed, glancing over at the bustling party that was occurring at the huge penthouse in front of them. “Well, we’ve stalled enough. Let’s head in now, I know MJ is probably tired from hosting all by herself.” He exclaimed, turning to Miguel.

“You got your mask?”

Miguel’s eyebrows instantly furrowed, his jaw clenching. “I didn’t bring a mask.” Peter ran a frustrated hand through his dark brown hair. “Miguel, it’s a Halloween party. Did you think you would just walk in there like…that!?” Peter motioned to Miguel’s outfit causing him to scoff. “I told you from the start I didn’t want to fucking come, Peter. Of course, I didn’t bring a mask.” Miguel snarled, causing Peter to hold the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. “Just…bare your fangs and do whatever you do with your eyes to make them redden. Look the part.”

Miguel was practically seething, his fangs starting to protrude from under his lips, his eyes darkening. “Just like that!” Peter said with a grin, covering his face with his clown mask before exiting the car. Miguel growled, leaving the car after Peter, and slamming the door shut behind himself.

Miguel walked behind Peter, his seven foot stature making him a foot taller than the family man before him as Peter led him towards the penthouse where his hosted Halloween party was occurring.

“What’s up Peter?!”

“Hi, Peter!”

“Nice party!”

Many spider-people dressed in costumes exclaimed to Peter when he appeared at the front door. Peter grinned happily, welcoming the social event whilst Miguel's body instantly tensed up, his face hardening.

He wanted nothing more than to leave…

“Hey, everyone. I’m happy to hear the party is going great so far.” Peter smiled, before stepping out the way to reveal Miguel. “But, look who I pulled out of the office?! No one other than the boss himself, Miguel O’Hara!” Peter chuckled, resting his elbow on Miguel’s shoulder. Miguel glared daggers at Peter putting him on the spot, before his crimson eyes swept across the stilled social event.

The party seemed to instantly come to a halt, small murmurs and whispers occurring at the sight of Miguel’s attendance. Even the music seemed to have lowered in volume.

Miguel sighed heavily, brushing Peter off. “I’m heading to the snack bar.” He uttered, wanting to get out of the hot seat Peter had carelessly thrown him into.

Peter nodded, returning back to frantically chatting with a few party attendees. Miguel left, entering further into the party.

It seemed as if by his mere presence, it was disrupting the little Halloween Bash. Dancers coming to a stop at the dance floor, excited conversations coming to a halt, and eyes behind different colored masks trained on him as he passed.

Miguel didn’t care. He had told Peter multiple times that Miguel O’Hara and social events didn’t mix, yet, Peter proceeded on dragging him here.

“Voy a matar a Peter un día de estos.”

He angrily mumbled, opening the blue cooler by the snack bar to pull out a cold beer bottle. He brought the bottle to his lips, using his fangs to pop open the lid before taking huge gulps of the alcoholic beverage, his Adam’s Apple bobbing with each swallow. A contented sigh passed his lips when he pulled the beer from his mouth

“That’s good.” He breathed, his amber eyes moving to take in the party whilst he leaned against the wall.

The main party where Miguel stood, was located in a spacious living room, the many furniture pushed back to create a dance floor. A DJ stood at the front, turning tables and hyping up the party whilst many costumed bodies danced before him.

Miguel was rather overwhelmed. His enhanced nose picked up on so many scents, so many smells ranging from the aroma of the delicious delicacies that covered the snack table, to the intense mingling of women's perfume and male’s cologne, and the sweat that leaked from the dancing Spider-people on the dance floor.

His ears also were hit intensely by the loud soundwaves of the speakers, and chatter of the spider-people around him, but there was one conversation that piqued his interest.

“Come on. Get on the dance floor with me?!”

He heard a young girl say somewhere to his right.

Miguel leaned against the wall, sipping his beer whilst his dark brown eyes searched the party for the identity of the voice when he located the two figures.

A girl in a black witch dress, pointy hat, and tall boots stood before another woman, tugging at her arms. The young girl who looked to be in her early 20s was blocking Miguel's view of the other female she was conversing with.

Miguel continued to watch from afar, his enhanced hearing being able to pick up the entirety of the conversation between the two females.

“I-I don’t know, Gwen…I-I-I don’t want to go,” you mumbled nervously, hugging your body. Gwen sighed heavily, pushing a strand of her blond hair behind her ear, and twirling the small broomstick in her hand.

"But I want you to have fun. I didn't bring you here so you could hug the wall the whole night," Gwen, your best friend, explained with a pout, still tugging your arm. "Come on, get out of your shell."

You bit your lip nervously. "I-I feel out of my shell already w-with the Halloween costume you gave me," you timidly said, causing you and Gwen to glance down at your Halloween costume.

A long-sleeved leopard bodysuit covered your being, along with a pair of leopard cat ears headband was worn on your head as a long tail flowed from your backside. Your bodysuit completely exposed your thighs and legs, which were dressed with fishnet stockings. Knee-high, heeled leather boots covered your feet, and to top off your look, a black collar with a bell adorned your neck, and a black mask concealed your eyes and nose, leaving your dark red lips revealed.

The outfit was rather revealing for a timid and shy girl like you, but due to Gwen's persistence, you adorned the costume and came to the party hosted by her friend, Peter B. Parker.

"What are you saying!? You look fantastic! Stop worrying so much," Gwen giggled, briefly glancing back at the dance floor where she recognized a few spider-people before turning her attention back to you.

"Okay... I won't force you, but go check out the snack bar or something? Enjoy yourself." She grinned and then leaned in close to you, whispering loud enough to be heard over the pounding music.

"I even heard the Vampire Ninja himself is here."

Your eyes widened behind your mask. "W-wait, what!? M-Miguel O’Hara is here!?" you exclaimed, trying to hide the blush creeping into your cheeks. Gwen smirked, well aware of the effect Miguel had on you.

"Yep, so I suggest you get out there and show off that costume some," she playfully suggested before disappearing into the sea of dancing bodies on the dance floor. You bit your lip, pressing your back against the white walls of the penthouse.

The fact that Miguel O'Hara was at this Halloween party made you even more nervous.

You wanted to leave…

You remembered the day you were accepted into the Spider Society and your not-so-great first impression to Miguel O'Hara.

His striking appearance had made you a total klutz. You couldn't shoot your webs accurately or dodge incoming attacks, often ending up on your back in pain. But your extensive knowledge of the Multiverse and your skills in medicine, technology, and innovation compensated for your poor physical performance. You knew your ability to create a gadget in under 30 minutes, a task that took Miguel two hours was the main reason he accepted you.

After that embarrassing episode, you thought Miguel would never notice you, let alone look in your direction.

However, Miguel's crimson eyes couldn't help but be fixed on you at the party.

Once Gwen left, he finally was able to see the timid woman she was talking to and he couldn't believe who he saw…

He almost dropped his beer bottle.

You were stunning, absolutely breathtaking.

He’d never felt this way before about anyone. The mere thought of anything more than a good night with a woman made him shudder. He believed the whole relationship thing was a huge distraction, especially with the job and life he led.

His eyes continued to look you up and down, taking in the way the leopard costume accentuated your breasts, and feminine curves, and the sight of your flawless, luscious legs under your fishnet stockings.

What really made Miguel's heart flutter was the shyness that practically radiated from your body. He knew from your conversation that, like himself, social events weren't your thing as you were practically trying to become one with the wall and disappear from the party.

But despite your desires to be unseen, all you did was gain Miguel's attention more and more…

"Hey buddy!"

Miguel jumped, feeling Peter smack him on the back as the clown mask he wore on his face came into view in front of him. "Damn Miguel, now I scared you? I wasn't even trying that time." He cackled, causing Miguel to groan, tapping his ring of his middle finger against the brown bottle in irritation. "What do you want?" He growled, his flickering red eyes constantly glancing over at the leopard girl to see Gwen, your best friend had returned as the blondie was excitedly talking to you.

He couldn't hear the conversation, not with Peter rambling in front of him. "-And MJ took my phone when I was just trying to call her mom to check in on Mayday. She's just being so frustrating, man." Miguel's jaw clenched, his hand dangerously gripping his beer bottle. "So, you came over here…to talk about MJ preventing you from contacting your kid?" Miguel asked sternly, the tapping of his ring against the glass of his drink coming to a halt.

Peter didn't seem to notice the anger that was slowly rising up in his friend as he continued talking. "Yes and no." He snickered from behind his clown mask. "MJ had set up a little game in the guest bedroom upstairs, and wanted me to round up some people to play." He said. "Talking about, maybe playing would ease my worries about our daughter, like that will ever happen." He said with an eye roll.

Miguel scoffed, the mere thought of playing some childish game with a few spider-people made him recoil in disdain.

"Now why the hell-"

"O-okay…I-I'll play."

His ears picked up the sound of the enchanting feline from across the room. His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach, his eyes snapping over to Gwen and you to see your witch friend jumping up and down excitedly.

Miguel growled, running his frustrated, ring covered hand through his dark brown curls. Peter was still rambling on about the game and what it entailed, but Miguel wasn’t listening. He was debating on what to do, what to decide…

But he knew what his answer would be…

“I know you believe games like this are childish and we are like grown ass adults now, but live a little Miguel.” Peter rambled, whilst rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. “So, what do you say-

“Fine.” Miguel hastily responded, turning his amber eyes back onto Peter. “Come on Miguel, you can’t just- Wait what!?” Peter exclaimed in disbelief, believing that it would've been harder to get the stern male to comply with the game idea.

“Don’t make me say it again.” Miguel groaned, downing the rest of his beer bottle before placing it onto the table behind him, and turning back to Peter.

“So are we going or not?”

You sat beside Gwen in a circle of chairs with a lone, empty bottle on a table in the center.

Nervously, you bit your scarlet lip, your hands clenched into tight fists on your bare thighs, which were covered in fishnet stockings.

Your eyes shifted, taking in the other players participating in the Spin the Bottle game: Margo, MJ, Miles, and Hobie. Two vacant chairs stood in front of you and Gwen as she sighed heavily. "Gosh, when are we going to start?!" She exclaimed, causing Hobie to chuckle beside her, glancing over at the empty chairs as well.

"Seems as if there are others coming, Gwendy. Have more patience." He snickered, a black mask perched on top of his thick, black hair. The mask had eerie stitching over the eyes and mouth, illuminated by a neon light that flickers between red and blue emanating from the stitches. It bore a striking resemblance to a famous movie in which all rules and restrictions were abandoned, and the world embraced murder and other crimes. Surprisingly, it was a fitting choice for Hobie's personality. With the mask, Hobie wore all black which paired well with the mask.

“It’s supposed to be Peter coming. I don’t know where he is.” MJ said with a groan, a pink cowgirl outfit dressing her being.

"Yeah… Peter can be a real social butterfly," Miles retorted to your right, donned in a pirate costume, complete with a long leather coat, a waist sash, a cross belt filled with artificial pistols, heavy black boots, and a black pirate hat covering his head.

You stole a glance at Gwen with a small smile to see her trying not to make eye contact with the ebony-skinned male to your right. You knew Gwen had a thing for Miles, just like she knew you had a thing for Miguel.

"But if you know Peter, you know it's easy for him to get swept up in the crowd," MJ said with a grin, her red hair flowing over her shoulders from under her pink cowgirl hat. “He's always eager to introduce our daughter to anyone and everyone. I swear, his love for her knows no bounds." Laughter filled the room, and small conversations started among the guests, but you were too nervous to engage in the banter.

Margo turned her attention to you, her purple skin glowing under her sheriff's cap, and black shades, her body dressed in a dark blue, police officer costume. She pulled down her shades, her amber eyes looking you up and down before she greeted you, extending her gloved hand. Timidly, you offered a smile and shook her hand firmly. "N-Nice to meet you," you stammered. Margo grinned happily. "Nice to meet you too, but why so tense?" she asked, tilting her head. "It's a party. You've got to relax a little, girl," Margo added with a giggle, prompting you to sigh.

"I... I know, I'm just not used to parties, and I've discovered that someone is here whom I wish weren't... Now, my nervousness has only…heightened." Margo nodded, understanding your situation.

"You don't have anything to worry about. The people you see in this circle are the best of the best in the Spider Society."

"Don't forget Jessica!" Gwen chimed in, causing Margo to giggle. "Jessica too," Margo acknowledged before turning her shaded eyes back to you. You smiled, glancing around the circle once more through your black mask before meeting Margo's eyes. Her words provided you with some comfort. "Thank you, Margo," you said.

"Anytime," she replied, though her eyes still lingered on you. Your eyebrows furrowed, prompting her to sigh.

"I... wasn't going to ask, but something you said piqued my interest."

"What?" You asked in curiosity and confusion. She scooted closer, lowering her voice.

"I was just wondering... who is it?" She asked, which only made you even more perplexed. "W-who is what?"

"Who is here at the party that is making you so nervous?" She asked more clearly, causing your eyes to briefly widen behind your mask. A lump formed in your throat as, simultaneously, the doors to the guest bedroom burst open.

"We’re here! We’re here!" Peter exclaimed, stepping inside with his clown mask drawn up to rest on the top of his head. "Finally!" Gwen said beside you, causing a laugh to escape Peter’s lips. "Whatever, bubblegum hair. MJ wanted me to bring another player for the game, so I did."

Gwen rolled her eyes at the nickname as everyone waited patiently to see the new player in the Spin The Bottle game. Peter peered out the doorway and beckoned with his head at the newcomer.

"Come on in, buddy." A deep sigh was heard as heavy footsteps echoed on the polished floor. It wasn’t long before the identity of the newcomer was revealed, and your eyes widened behind your mask.

It was Miguel O’Hara...

Your heart quickened, your hands clenched tightly into fists in your lap. You couldn’t believe the sight before you.

Miguel stood alongside Peter, his tall and commanding presence accentuating his distinct magnetism. His massive, sculpted frame was emphasized by the snug scarlet button-up he wore, and the shimmering golden jewelry adorning his body only amplified his already breathtaking allure. Miguel was a living work of art, an embodiment of perfection with muscles that rippled with every move, from the chiseled contours of his face down to his powerful, well-defined legs. His striking features, framed by dark, tousled hair, left no room for imperfection, making him an irresistible vision of masculinity and charm.

Hobie’s laughter snapped you from your trance, drawing everyone’s attention. "Hey mate, where’s your costume?" He asked Miguel teasingly as you looked over your shoulder at Miguel and Peter to see Miguel clench his jaw, his eyes flickering red in anger.

“Hey, hey. Settle down,” Peter said, trying to calm the situation. “Yeah, let’s play the game now.” Gwen begged as Miguel and Peter began to make their way to the empty chairs in front of you.

You tried your hardest to keep your gaze off the large, tanned male, but it was challenging with how attractive he looked, despite not making any effort to do so.

Miguel took the seat right in front of you, his amber eyes scrutinizing your appearance.

'Damn, you are even better up close.'

He thought to himself, taking the time for his eyes to trail over your every being. His breathing became heavier, his eyes flashing red in arousal as he continued to look at you.

“Okay, now that everyone is here,” MJ began with a smile. “Let’s start!” A round of cheers emerged from the players, but you and Miguel were silent. You, trying your hardest to keep your gaze on your lap and calm your racing heart, and Miguel instilling every action and look you made into his brain.

After a while of decision, a choice was made for Miles to go first. “Well, I hope I make a good spin,” he chuckled, leaning over to give the empty wine bottle a spin.

Everyone was on the edge of their seats as the bottle soon slowed down to land on Margo. She smirked, looking beside her at Miles. “Guess I’m the lucky candidate,” she chuckled as Miles leaned over to pick out a small slip of folded paper in a bowl on a nearby table. He opened it and began to read aloud either a challenge or a deep question that had to be answered by the chosen player.

“Okay Margo, my paper says, 'Who in the room do you think has the best sense of humor?'”

Your eyes glanced around the circle, wondering who would be a good choice for the question.

You were honestly stuck between Hobie and Peter. They both, in their own way, were funny guys, but you wondered what Margo would choose.

She looked around the circle with a grin. “That’s an easy question…” she hummed when a mischievous smile spread across her lips.

“Me.”

The room erupted in groans and laughs. You giggled, and when you glanced up, you saw Miguel looking back at you, a faint smile on his lips. You blushed and looked away, but Peter couldn’t resist chiming in. “Oh, come on! I know you were thinking of me, weren't you, Margo?”

“To be honest, no,” Margo laughed, causing another round of laughter to erupt and Peter to pout. MJ smiled, running a soothing hand through his hair. “You can’t be chosen for everything, baby,” she consoled Peter as the game continued.

“Who’s next!?” Gwen exclaimed, her excitement evident, eager to join the game. “It’s Margo's turn. Whoever the bottle lands on goes next,” MJ explained, leaving Gwen with a slight pout.

You gave her a small smile and patted her arm, speaking timidly. “I-It’ll be your turn soon.” Gwen nodded before a huge grin spread across her lips. Your eyebrows furrowed at the sight.

“I honestly can’t wait until it’s your turn. You might get to do something a little cheeky with—”

“D-Don’t say that!” You exclaimed in a hushed tone, causing her to laugh. “I-I already couldn’t function before, and now that…he’s here, I-I just can’t.” You said quietly. Gwen smirked, patting your thigh. “It’s called being highly attracted to someone. I get it too.”

“B-but I can’t…h-he doesn’t even like me,” you said sadly, biting your lip. Gwen shrugged her shoulders with a smile. “How do you know? You’ve never asked him.”

Gwen was right; you’ve never asked Miguel if he was interested in you or not, but Miguel is honestly an unapproachable person. He’s so very intimidating and indecipherable that it’s scary talking to him even for normal, simple things.

Just the thought of coming to him asking if he, the Spider Society leader, has a thing for you, a spider woman who becomes a total klutz around him.

You couldn't bear the thought of what he might say…

You breathed a sigh as Gwen’s eyebrows furrowed. She shook her head, placing a reassuring hand on your arm. “Hey…don’t worry about that right now. Let’s just enjoy the game.” You smiled softly at her before turning your attention back onto the game to hear Peter talking about Mayday.

“-And that’s when I knew my daughter was going to be just like me, so that’s why I choose Mayday as the person who I'll switch places with for a week.”

A series of groans erupted after Peter’s words.

But Miguel was only half-listening...

His attention had been diverted by your quiet conversation with your best friend, Gwen, which he couldn't help but overhear due to his enhanced hearing.

'Who is my sexy gatita talking about?'

He wondered, his amber eyes subtly scanning your figure as he caught the tail end of Peter’s words. Miguel groaned at the sound of Peter mentioning his daughter once again, his focus returning to the game as he sat with one ankle resting on top of the opposite knee.

He was well aware that one of these questions would inevitably trigger Peter to launch into a monologue about his beloved daughter. It wasn't that Miguel had any ill feelings towards Mayday, the young child was perfectly fine. It was Peter's ceaseless chatter about his daughter that grated on Miguel's nerves.

He understood it stemmed from Peter's boundless love for his family, but there came a time when even love had its limits.

"Must you always talk about Mayday?" Miguel's deep voice resonated through the room, bringing the ongoing chatter to a halt. His presence, let alone his voice, held so much power that it silenced everyone in the room, their eyes focused on him. His amber eyes surveyed the others before settling on Peter. Peter heaved a heavy sigh, waving a dismissive hand at Miguel. "You'll understand when you experience even a fraction of unconditional love for someone. Then, you'll comprehend how I feel about my daughter and loving wife," he explained. MJ rolled her eyes, a smirk playing on her pink lips at her husband’s words.

Miguel’s eyes flickered over to you who was gazing at Peter and MJ. He couldn’t help but wonder if this was what he was feeling about you…

Love…

Or lust

“Can we continue?” Hobie chimed in, his dark brown eyes looking between Miguel and Peter. “I’m ready for some spicy stuff.”

"I... didn't add anything like that to the bowl, Hobie," MJ stated honestly, prompting Hobie to groan and run a frustrated hand over his ebony face. "Come on!? Really!?" he exclaimed, his British accent thick in his voice. "Then let's make up our own then. Fuck the bowl!" He announced, his dark brown eyes scanning the circle.

Your cheeks flushed with nervousness at Hobie's suggestion. You glanced at Gwen, who was smirking mischievously at you. "Yeah, I agree, forget the bowl."

In that moment, you wished you could disappear.

'Why, oh why, are you doing this, Gwen!?'

You thought, your black heeled boot tapping nervously on the floor as you bit your reddened lip.

Miguel experienced a rush of mixed emotions at Hobie's words. The change in the rules was unexpected and filled him with a sense of dread, but it also...

Stirred a sense of excitement...

His eyes drifted to you, your anxiety palpable. He still didn't know your name, but he was eager to do anything with you at this point.

He didn't know what excited him more...

Your alluring costume, accentuating every aspect of your exquisite figure and curves...

Or your shyness, which was so cute that it warmed his heart.

Miguel sighed, briefly torn between the two enticing qualities. Nevertheless, he shifted his focus back to the game, noticing that the majority of the circle had agreed to the new rules. As Peter spun the empty bottle on the table, you were a bundle of nerves, your heart pounding loudly in your chest.

Relief washed over you when the bottle didn't land on you.

Instead, it pointed directly at Hobie.

Hobie, his lips adorned with a silver ring, broke into a confident smirk upon being chosen by the wine bottle. "Hell yeah. Now we're talking!" he exclaimed, turning his gaze to Peter. "Give me a good one, mate." Peter chuckled and, playfully, teased everyone by drawing out the moment.

MJ smacked his arm in mock irritation. "Stop playing around," she giggled, causing Peter to join in the laughter. Finally, he relented and posed a question to Hobie. "You wanted a good one, so I'll ask a question."

Hobie leaned back in his chair, a mischievous grin adorning his face. "Lay it on me," he said confidently.

"Share with the lovely players and myself a secret turn-on of yours that you've never told anyone,"

Hobie's eyebrows rose for a brief second at Peter's unexpecting question, but his smirk widened. This was a question you hadn't anticipated, but now that it was on the table, you couldn't help but lean around Gwen to get a closer look at Hobie, waiting with bated breath for his response.

"I'm really into teasing."

Some people's eyes widened at the nonchalance in his voice. Hobie chuckled at the sight of the stunned reactions. "Don't look at me like that," he snickered, biting his lip ring. "Let me tell you what I mean by... teasing... for the uneducated ones," he teased, glancing over at Miles, who scoffed and rolled his eyes.

Hobie looked around the circle, his voice becoming hushed and alluring as he spoke. "I'm talking about the type of teasing that is so good and blissful, yet so wicked and cruel," he explained. He leaned closer, propping his elbows onto his knees, his intense amber eyes fixing on each individual in the circle. His words drew everyone in, making them feel the intensity of his desires.

"The type of teasing that delays the main event. That has you sexually frustrated and begging your lover to continue...

To do...

More..."

He paused, allowing his words to hang in the air for a moment.

"Do you all catch my drift?"

Silence filled the guest room, and you felt your mouth go dry. You bit your lip, your body heating up. Hobie's enticing words filled your mind with lewd thoughts of Miguel.

Him teasing you with his tongue and fangs.

Touching you with his large, veiny hands,

Whispering naughty things into your ear...

You squeezed your thighs together in your seat, blushing a little. When you briefly glanced at Miguel, he met your eyes with his crimson ones. You quickly looked down at your lap.

"O-kay!" Miles exclaimed, clasping his gloved hands together. "Sounds spicy. On to the next," he said with a polite smile. Hobie settled back in his seat, wearing a satisfied expression as if he had just earned a hard-fought reward. "Thank you for joining my Ted Talk," he quipped.

Laughter erupted after Hobie's joke, and the atmosphere became more comfortable as the game continued.

"Alright, spin that bottle!" Margo exclaimed loudly as Hobie spun it, causing the black bottle to twirl at such a fast pace that it was almost dizzying to watch.

All eyes were fixed on the spinning wine bottle, and it ultimately pointed towards Gwen. Hobie brushed his tongue along his lip ring, his gaze locked onto the twenty-one-year-old girl. "What shall I give you, Gwendy? Hmm?" he smirked, earning an eye roll from Gwen. "Come on, Hobie, stop playing around," she giggled, bringing a smile to Hobie's lips. "Fine, I've got one."

"What's the kinkiest thing you've ever done or would like to do, little drummer?"

A smile spread across Gwen's lips as she twirled her witch broomstick in her fingers, her gaze scanning the room. You knew there was more to Gwen than met the eye. She was an adventurous person who likely had a lot of experiences you weren't aware of, leaving you in the dark about her answer.

"I'd say a kink I'd like to try is exhibitionism."

Your eyes widened behind your mask at Gwen's words. She wanted to engage in sensual activities in public!?

The very thought made you nervous, but you could see why it would be alluring and incredibly tempting…

Especially with Miguel.

Your mind went into overdrive, imagining all the places where you and Miguel could get a little frisky.

The Spider Society's library,

The gym,

Under the table in the cafeteria.

The possibilities seemed endless, and just the thought of Miguel being your partner in such endeavors was enough to send shivers down your spine and make you wet with desire.

Miguel's eyes instantly snapped to you. Throughout the game, he had sensed something—an arousal that stood out to him like a sore thumb, but he couldn't quite pinpoint the source.

Now, he did…

His eyes reddened as he noticed your thighs squeezed tightly together. To a regular person, your action might have gone unnoticed, but not for Miguel…

He practically smelled your sweet nectar, a subtle but alluring scent that went straight to his cock. It stirred his arousal, and his member began to slowly harden beneath his black slacks, the fabric tightening around his growing desire.

He bit his lip harshly, his fangs sinking into his flesh, as he wanted nothing more than to grasp your soft thighs in his hands, part your legs, and taste just how sweet your essence truly was…

A low, involuntary groan escaped him as he fought to contain his desire. He pulled his ankle higher up his opposite knee, trying to hide his growing excitement.

"Oh really, Gwendy?" Hobie teased, drawing everyone's attention back to the game. Gwen waved her hand dismissively at him. "That's all you get," she laughed before looking down at the bottle. "Finally! Now I can spin!" She shot you a mischievous glance before giving the bottle a spin.

You knew that look Gwen had given you.

She was hoping it would land on you.

Your heart started to race as you bit your lips anxiously, your legs bouncing nervously, increasing in speed whilst you watched the bottle slowly come to a stop.

It was like Gwen had powers other than her spider abilities..

Because it happened…

The bottle landed on you.

Your heart sank as the bottle pointed at you, and you found yourself in the hot seat. You turned your eyes to Gwen, who was already smirking back at you, clearly delighted that the bottle had chosen you.

"Finally, it's your turn to take the hot seat, Y/N."

Your name...

Miguel had finally learned it.

‘Y/N,’ he repeated in his head, his flickering red eyes studying you with newfound interest, then it all clicked into place…

"Y/N!?

As in the clumsy and timid Spiderwoman?!"

His intense gaze roved up and down your form as if he couldn't believe his eyes. The nerdy woman he had welcomed into the society not too long ago turned out to be a stunning model underneath it all, and it took his breath away.

The more he looked at you, he still couldn't wrap his head around the fact that the same girl who continually spilled her coffee in the mornings and dropped her Goober burger during lunch looked like this.

If only he had seen you sooner...

He bit his lip, filled with anticipation, wondering what spicy question your friend would dare you to answer, because she wouldn't dare to push a shy, timid girl like you out of your comfort zone...

Right?

You silently begged Gwen with your eyes, hoping she wouldn't put you in an uncomfortable situation; however, Gwen had a knack for getting you out of your shell and right into the scorching, hot seat…

"Y/N, I dare you to share a passionate kiss with Miguel for 30 seconds."

Your entire body seemed to freeze in shock, struggling to comprehend what Gwen had just asked of you. The room filled with surprised glances, and even a few cheers hinted at the anticipation that things were about to get interesting. You gulped, turning your gaze to Miguel. Amid the cheers of the players, his carmine orbs locked with yours. While his expression remained stern, his eyes held an enigmatic allure, something you couldn't quite define, yet it drew you in nonetheless.

"Why Miguel?" Margo inquired with a chuckle, snapping you from your trance. Your heart was thumping rapidly in your chest at what Gwen’s response could be, but you should have known that Gwen always had a trick up her sleeve.

After all, she was a master of manipulation...

"The two of them have been rather quiet. I thought it'd help loosen their nerves," Gwen explained, her words met with sounds of approval and agreement from the guests, only serving to deepen the scarlet hue on your cheeks.

You locked eyes with Miguel once more, finding a small smirk gracing his lips. His amber eyes shifted to a deep crimson as he cleared his throat, lowering his legs to the floor and leaning back in his chair, welcoming you with his body language.

"Well then, let's go, Y/N!" Margo exclaimed, joining the chorus of encouragement as peer pressure began to take hold. The room filled with voices urging you on, and you sighed, unsteadily getting to your feet.

"O-okay," you stammered, Miguel's eyes shifting to a deeper shade of red with each step you took.

Miguel was undeniably aroused by the situation. The mere sight of you walking toward him ignited a powerful desire to touch you to course through his veins.

"Sit on his lap, Y/N!"

Gwen's shout from behind you only deepening your blush. You knew that if you didn't do what Gwen said, she'd tease you relentlessly for the rest of the night. You approached Miguel with a pounding heart and a timid demeanor.

"I-is that okay?" you stammered, your voice thick with shyness. "I-if I sit in your lap?"

Miguel couldn't help but smile, a sly grin spreading across his tanned lips. Your bashful words only exciting him further. "If you'd like," he huskily answered, parting his legs to welcome you. Your eyes couldn't help but trace his toned thighs beneath his black slacks.

You almost drooled at the sight…

A rush of newfound boldness surged through you as you climbed onto his lap, your legs resting on either side of his. Even in his seated position, Miguel's impressive height and strength were unmistakable. His body felt solid and muscular beneath you, and you couldn't help but gasp at how built he was.

You shakingly exhaled, nervous about what to do next. Your entire body was completely hot and the close proximity between Miguel and yourself wasn’t helping at all.

You bit your lip, feeling his thighs pressing into your own and just the thought of his crotch against your bottom made you blush even more. Miguel smirked up at you, the telltale signs of your anxiety evident. He gently took your chin in his thick fingers, lifting it for your eyes to meet his red ones. "Just focus on me, Cariño," he whispered, his eyes carefully tracing your face whist his thumb caressed your jaw. "It's just a challenge." He reassured.

A charming smile played on his lips, his sharp canines catching the light and capturing your attention as he spoke. The sight of his redden orbs, sharp teeth, touch and words only made your body burn up. His demeanor and actions were very unexpected. Your breath catching in your throat and your heart racing at his gentleness.

Miguel was mostly cold and distant toward you, unable to maintain eye contact before a clumsy mistake left him cursing under his breath and looking away in annoyance and second-hand embarrassment. So, the idea of receiving comforting words and his feather-like touch was something you could only dream about, unable to believe it could ever be real.

You gulped, feeling as though the entire world had disappeared in that electrifying moment, leaving just you and Miguel. Shakingly, you nodded, causing Miguel's smirk to deepen.

The sizzling intensity in your gaze was matched by Miguel's as you began to lean closer, your lips tantalizingly close to each other. The anticipation was palpable, with an overwhelming longing and yearning building between the two of you.

As you drew nearer, that longing and eagerness swelled, breaking free of restraint. Finally, your lips met in a passionate, searing kiss that took you both by surprise. A soft moan escaped you, his lips, surprisingly soft and inviting, met yours, contrasting with his usual cold and grumpy demeanor.

With each passing moment, your initial shyness melted away, replaced by newfound boldness. Your fingers tangled in his dark brown curls, pulling him closer to deepen the kiss. Miguel groaned, his large hand finding its way to the small of your back, pulling you tightly against him and pressing your bodies together. The heat radiating between you was almost tangible, your tongues, engaged in a fiery dance, igniting sensations that satisfied a profound hunger you both hadn't known existed.

Lost in each other, the world around you faded into oblivion. The 30 seconds allotted for the challenge came and went, but you and Miguel continued with your passionate exchange. Heavy breaths mingled, your focus remained solely on each other as desire burned hotter with every passing second.

A surprised moan escaped your lips when you felt Miguel's large hand grope your ass through your leopard costume. His thick fingers pressing into the flesh that made you even more blinded by lust for him.

He grinned against your swollen lips at your cute reaction, spurring his desire even further. The two of you continuing to kiss hungrily, his fangs occasionally nipping your lips, intensifying your craving for him which only caused you to pull him closer with much fervor…

…

"Damn! They are still at it!"

Hobie's exclamation brought you back to reality, and you realized the audience that had been watching your heated exchange. You hastily pulled away from Miguel's lips, his intense gaze and smirking, bitten lips reflecting his lust for more. Your body felt hot and flustered, and you were acutely aware of the places he had touched you, especially your bottom.

Feeling your embarrassment and regret, you quickly climbed off Miguel's lap and returned to your seat, keeping your gaze down to avoid meeting anyone's eyes.

The thought of kissing the leader of the Spider Society in front of everyone weighed heavily on your mind, and you questioned your decision to participate in this game, let alone, come to this party.

Gwen glanced over at you and Miguel, a smile spreading across her face as she then started back up the game to get you out of the hot seat. She even spun for you, but no one could ignore the obvious tension in the air.

Miguel's crimson eyes, blown with lust continuously met your timid form, a sly grin spreading across his lips the longer he stared at you.

He had plans for his sexy, timid gatita, plans that would push you to step out of your comfort zones and embrace the desires that had ignited between the two of you...

A/N: I hope everyone enjoyed Part 1 of the Halloween Special. Stay tuned for part 2! 🕸️😁👻🕸️

#miguel o'hara #spider man 2099 #across the spiderverse #the blue panther #miguel ohara #miguel #miguel smut #miguel spiderman #miguel spiderverse #miguel x fem!reader #miguel x reader smut #miguel x reader #miguel x y/n #miguel x you #atsv miguel #spiderman 2099 #spiderman ats

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lurkingshan · 9 months

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I Feel You Linger in the Air: Novel vs Drama

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Happy IFYL special day! While I wait (not so) patiently for the special episode to become available for international viewers, I thought I would stop being lazy and get around to writing up my thoughts on the adaptation choices of the drama now that I’ve finally had a chance to read the original novel.

First, let me just say: the novel is so fun. I’m so glad folks like @clairedaring and @pharawee talked about it on here and @waitmyturtles read it first and told me to jump on it, because I’ve had a really hard time with poorly translated y novels before and was definitely skeptical. But the story was excellent and the English translation was really solid, so a great time was had by all and I wasn’t even salty about spending eighteen American dollars on it. I didn’t think the novel was perfect (turtles can attest I had a few LOUD complaints) but it was a very enjoyable read. Shoutout to @bengiyo, @neuroticbookworm, and @wen-kexing-apologist as well for listening to me rant about Tee’s choices as I made my way through the novel. Bonus: if you have the chance to read this novel while vacationing in Thailand surrounded by plumeria trees and romantic scenery, I highly recommend.

So, with that established, let’s talk about the adaptation! Adapting novels to a visual medium always comes with a lot of choices, and it’s not easy to make everything translate effectively. On the other hand, a live action drama can make some of what’s on the page feel even more vivid and new elements can be introduced that add to the canon. I’m on the record as both loving this show and feeling like there were some significant missteps in the writing, so I really wanted to understand the source material and how some of those choices were made. So here’s your spoiler alert for IFYL’s adaptation: it’s a real mixed bag of choices from our dear frenemy Tee Bundit, and all in service of one clear goal.

I Feel You Linger in the Air, but Make It Sadder!

I’m going to break down the details below, but this is the TL; DR right here. Every choice Tee made in this adaptation was in service of transforming a relatively light and often comedic time travel romp into a story of deep melancholy and a thorough examination of queer pain. This is Tee’s whole schtick, so we can hardly be surprised; and yet I was kind of taken aback by how stark the difference in these stories felt even as a lot of the plot stayed the same. During the drama’s airing @respectthepetty talked about how this show was just too damn sad for her, and I gotta say, she was definitely picking up what Tee was putting down. YMMV on how sad you like your romance, but Tee Bundit is a very sad boy indeed.

Jom

gif by @junghaesin

Let’s start here, because this is definitely my biggest grievance with Tee: he removed most of Jom’s personality from the book in order to give us a flatter, sadder version of him that fit better with a much more melancholy vision for this story. As it turns out, Jom was originally written to be smart, sassy, and very funny (h/t to @stuffnonsenseandotherthings whose post on this really got me interested in reading to see the difference). Novel Jom is a smartass who never misses the opportunity to work in a salty comment or express his frustration when things aren’t going his way, and he’s such an active character. He does not just sit back and let things happen to him; he thinks and he struggles and he tries. By comparison, show Jom just feels… vaguely confused, mildly depressed, and wildly passive most of the time. This is by no means a knock on Nonkul, who is a fantastic performer—these are clearly writing and directing choices and he is interpreting the character as instructed.

And it’s not just the removal of his core personality, either. Jom in the book has emotional intelligence and a stronger sense of connection to others. For one, he actually cares that Eung Phueng is his sister! Throughout the book, we see him dedicate time and energy to finding ways to care for his sister despite their different social stations; this dynamic is completely absent from the show, where Jom doesn’t even seem to remember Eung Phueng has his sister’s face most of the time. This was a major hole in the show and I still don’t really understand why Tee dropped the ball on it when there was so much material to drawn from in the book.

Winner: The novel, hands down. If you take nothing else away from this post, please take it as a recommendation to read the novel so you can experience Real Jom in all his sassy glory.

The Mythology

gif by @chickenstrangers

Now, I can’t really claim that either the novel or the show does a fantastic job with the mythology, because there’s a lot of hand waving in either case and some definite plot holes. But I will give the book credit for being upfront from the start: it didn’t really intend to explain it beyond giving us a little preamble about wormholes (yes, wormholes!) and for having Jom actually notice and care (and get very amusingly frustrated) that he didn’t understand what the wormhole wanted him to do or how to control it. He actually tried quite a lot in the book to figure it out, rather than just sitting around gazing morosely into the distance. In the end, the book tells us that Yai vowed to love Jom at first sight in every lifetime, which is a vow he made after the wormhole brought Jom to him but somehow affects the times that had already happened from our perspective. It’s a paradox that doesn’t fully make sense, but it is at least an explanation.

The show, by contrast, intentionally added layers to this mystery that it had no intention of resolving. The drawings opening up connections to the present, the ghostly visages haunting the characters, the glimpses of Jom in the future doing things we never saw in the original timeline, Mustache Yai kissing Jom in the water—all show inventions, and all setting up an expectation that some sense would be made of these clues. Which of course, never happened. Instead, these things were used to contribute to the spooky scary vibe and make everything feel sadder, and the show offered no explanation at all for why any of this happened.

Winner: It’s a draw since neither really did it well, but I’m staying salty with Tee for fucking with me.

Family Drama

gif by @thii-nii

Here is where we get into some of the stuff Tee added to the story that actually worked pretty well. One very smart adaptation choice: he made Yai and Eung Phueng siblings so that Yai would have a reason to be more involved in their household and able to interact much more with Jom in the early parts of the story; in the novel there is no connection between the households and Yai and Jom barely interact for the first several months after Jom arrives in the past. He also added a lot of family drama in the back half of the show: the struggles with Yai’s father, the shady uncle, the plot to force Yai to marry, and the big confrontation over Robert’s misdeeds are all show inventions, likely added both to pad out the story and make the relationship harder and sadder, and because he was looking for an alternate source of conflict since he was not doing Part 2 of the book (which takes place once Jom is yanked away again and shot back to the Commander Yai time period).

Another major change from the novel to the show: in the novel, Yai’s plans to go study abroad were already set before Jom even got there, not something he won as a consolation in a negotiation over marriage. Which has some implications I’ll get into in the next section.

Winner: The drama, where the family dynamics were much more thoroughly explored.

The Romance

gif by @loveisactivated

As I mentioned above, Tee made a smart choice in bringing Yai more firmly into Jom’s orbit early in the story, but unfortunately, he didn’t do much with that advantage and actually failed to use some of what the novel gave him to work with. In the novel, Jom is much more aware of the attraction between him and Yai, very attuned to Yai’s flirting and their age gap, very aware of his own growing attachment to Yai, and thinking through the implications of all of it as it grows, which is a more natural and believable build up to their romance than in the show, where Jom seems distracted and unaware of Yai’s affections until they suddenly start jumping each other. That lack of romantic development in the show (which we discussed even as it was airing) was not because the material was not there for Tee to use in the book; he simply had other priorities and neglected to build it properly in show time.

That said, I have to give major credit to Tee for how he handled the romance once our leads were together and intimately involved. First, he really brought some of the scenes that were in the book to life in a way that still has me shook, like Yai’s drunken poetry recitation (credit must also be given to Bright for his eye work in that and many other scenes, what a stunner). And on top of that, the drama has some of the best physical intimacy scenes I have ever seen in any drama, full stop, and that is nearly all Tee and his creative team. He used elements from a few scenes in the book, but he remixed and amplified them to be a lot more powerful, and certainly much more artful and sensual than the sex scenes in the book. That olive oil masturbation scene? The show gets full credit, and the way the direction, editing, and performances so vividly painted their attraction to each other still gives me shivers when I think about it.

But anyway, back to bitching about Tee: one of the scenes that really stuck out for me like a sore thumb in the romance arc in the show was when Yai learns he will be going abroad and he and Jom discuss it in a curiously flat and emotionless way, with Yai acting like it’s no big deal for them to be separated for three years. I mentioned above that this was a change from the book: in the novel Yai was already set to go abroad before he ever met Jom, it was not a new surprise that came about after they were together. They discuss Yai’s impending departure twice in the book; once when Jom is still only Yai’s majordomo, and then once again when they are lovers. As you can imagine, the emotional tenor of these two scenes are quite different. And Tee used the wrong one for the show! I almost threw the book at the wall when I realized I was reading the verbatim dialogue from that scene in the show in the context of Yai and Jom hardly knowing each other yet, and then again when I got to the second conversation that was actually appropriate for two lovers who do not want to be parted. That has to be one of the most senseless adaptation mistakes I have ever seen. Tee Bundit, what is wrong with you!!

Lastly for this section, I will just note that the very long, drawn out goodbyes between Yai and Jom are also a show invention. In the book, Jom gets yanked to the next time period with no warning shortly after they get together and begins his next adventure with another Yai. Since Tee was ending the show here in this time period, he went in a different direction, having Jom and Yai much more aware of Jom fading and anticipating a separation so that he could (say it with me) make everything sadder. His choice to wallow for two entire episodes in sorrow and melancholy and to put much heavier focus on Yai’s despair was entirely his own, and so very on brand.

Winner: It’s a draw. The book definitely writes the romantic arc more holistically and doesn’t have any of the missteps the drama does, but the show is so artful and the parts it gets right are so good I will remember them for the rest of my life. And I can’t pretend I’m not an angst monster at heart, so Tee’s sad af vision totally worked on me.

Sides and Queer Community

gif by @my-rose-tinted-glasses

Here is where Tee’s adaptation really shines, and I know others have discussed these changes before so I won’t go too deep on the details. But I absolutely have to give Tee props for taking tiny threads for these side characters in the books and building them into whole people that we actually care about. Especially in the case of Ming and Fong Kaew, Tee really made something of their extremely thin book stories to turn them into fan favorite characters with real growth arcs. I do think the book was better in the way it handled the fated connection between Fong Kaew and Khamsaen, but everything else about Fong Kaew’s story was deepened by the show. And Tee gets credit for adding so many meaningful stories for women characters in the first place, let alone developing a lesbian romance for Eung Pueng and Maey. He picked up on a tiny bit of subtext for underdeveloped characters in the book and ran with it, and it really enhanced the story.

He also used side characters as a means to make this story feel all around more queer, not only by including additional queer romances but by building out a real sense of community and solidarity among the queer characters. Not only the addition of nods to real queer history, but the speakeasy, James’s explicit queerness, and Nuey the Green Queen are all Tee additions to the canon that really enhanced the story.

Winner: The drama and it’s not close. Well done, Tee!

That Ending

gif by @dragonsareawesome123

One of my biggest interests in reading the novel was seeing how the ending with modern Yai is explained in the original source material, because I found the drama version of that scene so lacking. Well, it turns out, the novel did pretty much the same thing! The ending sequence of the book is even shorter than the scene in the show and similarly offers zero explanation for this new version of Yai or how he knows Jom before they jump each other and the story concludes. The main narrative ends there and the book then tacks on an epilogue explaining who this new Yai is, and it reads like an afterthought. Honestly, it felt to me like the writer ran out of steam and just didn’t bother to finish the story, and Tee did exactly the same thing. Which is kind of infuriating, because being able to fix stuff like that is one of the best things about a good adaptation.

Winner: Absolutely no one, my kingdom for a proper ending to this story.

gif by @pharawee

So, my conclusions? 1) Tee Bundit is the saddest creator in Thai bl, hands down; 2) It’s a draw between which version of this story is better. The novel and drama both have different strengths and significant flaws, but both versions are compelling and had me on the edge of my seat. I highly recommend the book to anyone who is missing the show and wants another chance to revisit these characters, plus the added bonus of seeing Jom wrangle Commander Yai, something we are unlikely to ever see on our screens (though hope springs eternal besties!). If you do decide to give it a read, come talk to me about it!

#i feel you linger in the air #ifylita #shoutout also to all the excellent giffers for this show #the tumblr gif search is hopelessly broken but i wanted y’all’s beautiful work in this post anyway #thai bl #shan shouts into the void

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