#i feel so tired every day
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seasonal depression is hitting so hard this year
#like it's so bad#vent stuff followes#not a day goes by where I don't feel like shit#and even if i do fun things I don't enjoy them#i could cry every day#i feel incredibly ugly#my hair is falling out in tons#i feel uncomfortable with my body in all the ways#i feel incredibly alone#and unloved and unlikeable#I'm not motivated for work#I'm not even motivated to play games#or make gifs as u might see#i feel so tired every day#i just wanna sleep forever
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make it vicious, take a stab
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#gojo satoru#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo#jjk satoru#blood/#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#just in case idk#i believe in night moves fv supremacy#i feel like i say this every time but im dead deceased on the floor in the ground etc etc#maximum effort fr gojo as usual sighhhhhhhhhhhh#3 days on this mf who let me draw another mirror who didnt talk me down#i got so frustrated after i finished his reflection only to realize i had a whole other half gojo to draw#do not look too closely ik its not perfectly mirrored ik ik ik i wanted to die the whole time pls b kind#especially the hair gjhdfkdgk the last mirrored char i drew was megumi and at least with him his hair is dark#with which i can Conceal my mistakes#none of tht here sighs . this freak and his florescent hair#anyway even tho i died and perished and expired etc i am . SO happy w this u have no idea#blood sweat and tears went into this one#and easter eggs! so many easter eggs#pls take it and enjoy im tired of staring at him and his god awful lipstick job . make yourself decent smh
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Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 2
[Pt. 1] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5] [Pt. 6]
#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr incorrect quotes#honkai star rail memes#hsr memes#honkai star rail meme#hsr meme#boothill#robin#hsr robin#sunday#hsr sunday#aventurine#dr ratio#ratiorine#aventio#acheron#black swan#acherswan#dan heng#march 7th#stelle#hsr trailblazer#what's the ship name for march and stelle. uh#i have no clue. it'd be their names smashed together right. starch??? 😭#whatever it is feel free to tag it if u want! and maybe i'll learn smthn bc surely there's another name for them#omfg i just googled it and apparently it IS starch you learn smthn new every day#anyways. here's hoping none of these have been done before!#i managed to make one (1) image that didn't include Aven or Ratio wow //edit: there's 3 i was just so tired i couldn't count lmao#anyways it's past my bedtime i spent too long making this and i still gotta do my HSR dailies rq so goodbye and goodnite to u all
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I just want to say, I have never once claimed to speak for all survivors… my posts are from my experience and I try to cover all angles. I’ll make posts about people being strong while making posts about it being valid to not identify with the word.
But getting aggressive comments on my posts about it how I “don’t speak for all survivors and should shut the fuck up” is honestly a lot. And using “I’m a survivor too” like it’s some valid excuse to be rude and aggressive isn’t okay either.
I blocked the person. And I will continue to block people that pull this shit. But it is getting beyond exhausting that people constantly come into my posts to say “this isn’t true for me”. And I can handle that but being told to “shut the fuck up” because you don’t personally relate to a post is honestly a lot.
#I am so over tired#and feeling so overly emotional#the urge to impulse delete my blog is a lot#I come on every day to attacks in my activity feed#in my ask box#as replies on my posts#people have literally made hate blogs about me#I’m tired#I’m a real person#I’m a real person struggling with my trauma just trying to do some good#swearing#tw hate
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I've been writing so much fucking fanfic material that I just yelled "AZIRAPHALE!!!" when my cat jumped onto the table 😭 the brainrot is becoming too real
#her name is alex mind you#but ive been inside crowley's head every day for almost a month now and its apparently taking root#the poor dear flinches not because she recognized the name but because i just yelled surely 😭#im so sorry kiddo#i feel like i just called my lover the name of my ex in the middle of sex 😭#dad still love you baby girl he is just a bit tired i promise#good omens#crowley#aziraphale#ineffable husbands#anthony j crowley#aziracrow#spencer speaks#and spencer loses his mind also apparently
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I reiterate that if you're going to ask people for donations, you will come across as extremely suspicious if you spam their inbox. People are likely to report and/or block you, thinking you're a bot. If you need donations, I do not recommend going about like this. I really, REALLY do not recommend it.
#blog post#not helpol#i am tired of the spam y'all#literally every single day since I've opened my ask box back up#i have gotten a SHIT TON of random people asking me for donations#which is somewhat silly considering i was literally just running my own donations#so no I'm sorry but i won't be answering asks about donations#i don't think it's ok to that personally; it feels really invasive and is extremely suspicious#because you know who else comes into your inbox asking you for money? bots. bots do that exact thing.#it's extremely difficult to know who to trust especially when gofundme isn't supported in gaza#nor is paypal actually#they ciuld just be using a VPN but i don't know enough about VPN to comment on that confidently#but i feel it's important that people are sceptical honestly#because there are assholes who will scam you and take advantage of your kindness for others#don't buy into a potential scam especially at a time where supporting oneself is often already a challenge
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Thinks about my next series again... I drew the icon for it!
I'm planning to have it launched within a year! I'm hoping for summer 2025. I want to make a prelaunch page before Time and Time Again ends so people can subscribe if they're interested, but I'm worried the series return would be too early...
#SORRY HAHAHA REPOSTING IMMEDIATELY#i. it. IM SORRY okay the.#i had 'im not interested in the comic' as an option but it immediately made me feel bad#DONT FEEL BAD IF YOU PICKED IT i put it there#i just realized its not really a helpful metric to me at all!#im making the comic either way!#so i just want to gague interest. disinterest doesnt do much for me. you can come and go as you please!#just wanting to retain readers as much as possible but without losing them due to taking too long#ahhhh the balance of marketing. a beautiful beast she is.#anyways yeah hoping to launch like about as tta is ending#or like at LEAST a prelaunch page by then#im also not intending for the prelaunch page to be like. announced...#moreso just a link i append on art for the series!#just so when a drawing of zagan gets 500 notes#people who are interested in what hes from can. see that...#anyways. sorry i haven't been posting work is wild im going 70+ hours a week again i am so tired#not much time to draw non work stuff#im hanging on by a thread of having multiple projects i can bounce between again#and sometimes thats this one! so heres the results of some mental health work variety#we were legion#polls#sorry for the instant repost. in my defense. i am exhausted.#i can not wait until im making a different comic that i can do a fucking. normal ass schedule with#where im not every week gasping for breath in some kind of bad at swimming metaphor.#anyways if youre not interested dont tell me. it doesnt matter to me. no offense but i just dont wanna hear it.#i want to make the comic and my audience as much as i love you all is not going to have any control over what i do with my art#im gonna make this comic if i only get it done on weekends after getting home from the fuckin movie theater#i am not working for webtoon again wnd im not forcing myself into the dirt for comics again#but im also never gonna stop making them. just need to build a healthier relationship!#FUCK I MADE IT A ONE DAY POLL.
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Got my blood test results back and guess who's very iron deficient again? It's me lol no wonder I've been so tired
#the person behind the yarn#I am so tired! so tired all the tiiiime#that's okay I have iron supplements#I am also on the low end of normal for B12 which is a surprise#oh wait I just compared to when I was severely iron deficient in like february#and they didn't test ferritin this time but all my other numbers are worse#oops! oops that's not good#my ferritin was 3 in February#I am feeling like that uh oh! I'm in danger comic#yikes lol time to make sure I am for reals taking the iron pills every day
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Aw man...
#Vent incoming wee woo wee woo#Goooood man I feel so. Stressed and anxious cuz of my job#I hate it. I hate trying not to cry every 5 minutes#I hate the feeling in my chest. It's like someone is poking really hard into it#It's almost suffocating#I feel awful. Every little thing makes me angry. I don't want to be angry at ppl who did nothing wrong. I don't want to be like this#I really wish I wasn't like this. Why can't I be more calm and normal#I feel like I need a good cry. But I don't have anywhere to go for that#When I'm at home I don't feel like crying cuz I purposefully distract myself from stress#But I do feel like crying at work#But ofc I can't cry at work#And even at the end of the Day when going home I'm too tired to cry. Plus it would look weird for other ppl walking by...#I hate this. I get all stressed durring work but then I can't let it out#I have work rn. And tomorrow#I'm just gonna have to feel awful until my Days off come#God. I really hate venting. I don't like ppl seeing me like this but. I don't have anything else left to relieve the pain#I just don't know what to do anymore#Where to go#Whatever. This feeling will go away eventually#It will come back ofc#I just wish there was a better way to ease the pain. But again. I don't have a place for that#So I'll just have to seat w these feelings until they go away#I'll try to keep myself distracted. Which will be hard cuz I. Am at work. The place which makes me feel these things in the first place#But whatever! I'll try anyways#I'll look at art. Or I'll think about characters that I like...#Save me fictional characters. Save me!!#Anyways. Vent over 🎉
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i wish i could be chill about media that i like but sadly, they will always take over my brain to an unhealthy extent (at least imo) i just hate that fandom bs actually bothers me this much, i sometimes wish i could stay somewhere between being a casual-ish fan and the level of interest i have now, like ofc ppl are gonna be shit no matter what but i realllly wish it didn't affect me at all like i wish i could see someone post something that completely mischaracterises my fave characters without being so pissed off about it or literally just any of the other drama happening in this fandom, i wish i could see it and not care about it
which ofc is hard bc most of the stuff that pisses me off and upsets me is how anti-black a lot of ppl in this fandom are like the outright racism and colourism that i see in this fandom is literally killing my interest a bit icl, i love louis, loustat and iwtv sm and i wanna stick around but seeing this stuff just puts a damper on my mood and interest
idk i probably won't go anywhere bc like i said i get obsessed with my interests to an unhealthy degree so i won't be able to reduce how fixated i am on this show and i was in my last fandom for like 5 years?!? (and i'm still there kinda) so i feel like with iwtv i will be here for a long time fr
anyways this whole thing is really disappointing and upsetting, i was really so happy to find a vampire show that had a gay black male lead and it didn't shy away from commenting on the racism and anti-blackness the character experienced from other characters, only to get to the fandom and see that there's ppl doing that and worse, it makes me feel like they truly watched the show with their eyes (and ears) closed
#i am tired#and i have only been here (the fandom) for 3-4months?!#tumblr isn't too bad bc i can't see a lot of the bad posts over here but twitter is just horribleeeeee#it's like every other day i see someone saying something racist about louis and half of the ppl engaging in the tweet don't even clock it#it makes me feel crazy#me yapping#sorry guys i will probably delete this im just venting#anyways i have no chill when it comes to my interests and i blame the autism 😁#i feel like i posted something exactly like this before so if i did oops m
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Oh yeah! New year. I was thinking that I’d like to bring daily fish facts to a dignified end of a round one thousand facts. The problem is, I’d have to gather enough strength to make 118 daily facts for nearly four months straight! And I’m a mighty good quitter once I’ve started. But then again fish facts were my whole thing…?? It would be a shame to end them so abruptly.
#maybe its not really quitting but feeling tired#i used to do so many things vigorously every day#i start them and then i drop them! nowadays i no longer bother to go through what people posted and reblogged while i was sleeping#i would like to do fish facts good but im just one woman and im so……..
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you do it to yourself, you do / and that’s what really hurts
#rick and morty#rick sanchez#artsbotz#lol cry harder old man !!!!!!!#i have no idea if this looks good i feel like im gonna pass out. hopefully its good LOLLL#link is to my c137 playlist. which im also not sure is good ill have to relisten when i can think straight#used my new brush for this which is nearly exactly the same as my old one. but cooler.#maybe ill explain the playlsist tmrw if i remember. sorry its like so hastag angstcore#i literally only ever make misery playslists. theyre more fun. mayeb one day ill make a fun one#IDK WHY I DREWWWW thsi tbfh actaully idk truly. every time i draw smth im like Why did i do that#i forget what i was trying to convey. oh well#hopefully it makes some senseee. mayeb#ok soooo tired gonna pass oht now snzzzzzz
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inside you there are two wolfs
#repostober#day 19#undertale#alphys#gaster#wd gaster#ive given you old man gaster & alphys father daughter friendship dynamic#now its time for same age group queer nerd coworker besties#this was inspired by a con i went to#when i was there i couldnt help but notice two prominent kinds of people#cosplayers/anime fans dressed in cutesy merch and clothes(/positive)#and gamer nerds who were also dressed in merch and pins of games they liked (/positive)#and i also couldnt help but notice that its them#they are in fact discussing an anime they watched and with them both being academics i can only assume that every argument is extremely#detailed well thought out and informed. id like to believe that they sometimes site sources. aloud.#details i love in this are alphys painting her tail to look like mewmews for her cosplay i just think its cute hdfks#you can pry aroace gaster out of my cold dead hands that man made his children in tubes i just know it#also i shouldve drawn him wearing portal merch i almost wanna redraw this just for that#actually i really wanna redraw this i think. i wont rn (i am so. tired) but i feel enough anger at gaster not wearing#an aperture science t shirt that it might make me draw again
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okay so fuck outer banks
#i remember when i was a diehard fan of this show and even made obxhub#made gifsets every single day because my favorites were sarah and jj like these blonde dumbasses with the biggest hearts#and yet this is what it all comes down to????????#i binge watched both parts as soon as they came out and i'm just over it#fuck that show fuck the writers fuck everybody#outer banks#and okay even if it was about rudy wanting to leave which is what they're playing it out to be like they still could have done it better#like be so fucking for real everybody and their mothers can tell madelyn wants out and yet she's still there playing sarah#im just sick and tired yall what happened to the feel good summer show with sitcom vibes???????????????#anyway my boy has always deserved better and if you disagree argue with the fucking casket im done#outer banks spoilers#jj maybank
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there is something so. intensely frustrating about feeling incapable of showing up for people the way that they want you to
#i wish people understood that it's so hard to be present in their lives and that closeness for me isnt about frequency of contact#but how open we feel during that contact#my brain is such a difficult place to live in it is so loud and so busy all the time#24 hours a day is a constant monologue and argument with myself for everything and it means that i just dont have the capacity to talk to#others most of the time#and like. i know this is so unreasonable. obviously we have to be present in the lives of people that care for us#but it just feels like every day i have to like. get on a stage and perform to every person in my life that cares about me so i can meet the#criteria of being a Good Friend or Good Girlfriend or Good Fan Artist or Good Mutual or Good Server Member#i feel like it is such a blessing to be seen by others as someone to expect things from#but as more people have started to love me it feels like i have to 'go out and perform' more and more and i am very exhausted#i wish i was someone that was easy to love and care for in the way that i am. and i dont mean that self deprecatingly it's just#i know im very hard to care about and love. because i disappear all the time and come back in a big flurry as soon as i get the energy back#and im just feeling it a Lot More lately because im starting to think this isnt going to be a short term thing i have to do before i start#feeling comfortable with a person#this is going to be my whole life#if i get married im going to have to 'go out and perform' and be a good wife and be affectionate and happy and not closed into my own brain#for days#if im going to make friends with colleagues I'll have to go out when they invite me and have to reply ro their texts and i cant just go#silent for weeks while i try to negotiate with my thoughts and then reappear once i make the slightest breakthrough#im very tired and sad. i want companionship but i feel like the kind of person i am is not fair for people who would be my companion#vent post#♡alizeh talks♡
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UUGHH I JUST HAD THE WORST DAY IM SO ANGRY AND FRUSTRATED GRRRR !!!!! goes to draw my best friend @jumjum-crafts 's guy to blow off steam
★ version without text + reference image under cut :
★ song : "STATIC ELECTRICITY HUMAN – Computer Flavor" – kairikibear
#before you ask . dear jummy – yes . this was what the ask i sent you the other day was alluding to#i have a very complicated relationship with your colin . but you should be aware of the fact that seeing him invokes intense primitive –#– feelings within me . and one cannot decipher whether they are positive or negative#in any case#JDHDHDJRJRHT I HATE MY LIFE#I HATE THIS SHIT#I WANT TO BE DEAD#there's so much stuff happening every day and im constantly overwhelmed and tired and it's so hard to get out of bed and i don't even want –#– to wake up in the morning . every day just gets worse than the last#everyone around me is doing so much . living their life to the fullest . making huge future and career decisions and planning way ahead#and what am i doing ?#im laying in bed . crying because today was just too much to bear . trying to gain an ounce of happiness by ripping out another piece of –#– my soul to hand out to someone i admire#is this what it's going to be like forever ? bleak nothingness ? constant desolation ?#...#im gonna go to bed#dhmis#dhmis art#dhmis colin#colin the computer#fanart#fanart for a friend#vocaloid#vocaloid inspired#i actually had a lot of fun with this . even if the background was the biggest pain i ever had the pleasure of drawing#this entire song makes me feel comfortable#i might make something for someone else#and im debating if im actually gonna be doing a halloween drawing in the first place . at least one that will be on time with the holiday#whatever#please ignore me
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