#i feel love is the kind of song that probably transports you to a different universe when high

[island-in-the-shadows]

Sometimes I'm fine and sometimes I'm deep into imagining human Daniel high on Armand's blood while they dance together to Donna Summer's "I Feel Love" at some club during the late 70s.

[theetherealbloom]

UNEVEN ODDS - CH. 9 (Epilogue)

Chapter 9 (Epilogue): There’s Some Kind Of Heaven Just Around The Corner

Summary: The Reader is dragged into the Last of Us universe and has no choice but to watch the events unfold or will she be able to change what was already written?

Paring: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Age-gap Romance, Violence, ANGST, Swearing, Suicide, FLUFF, PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, the pandemic, character death, INFECTED, MY SCIENCE IS WONKY, probable plot holes, rusty writing, TLOU is dark please read at your own risk!

Word Count: 2k

A/N:  After many months of not writing, I present to you the epilogue of S1 for TLOU. Thank you for sticking by me with my silly little stories, I can never express how grateful I am to have you all. I’m horrified and excited at the thought of S2, maybe the reader could change the important ending… who knows. Stay safe everyone <3

Song: Intermission by Sleeping At Last

Previous Chapter -> Season 2 | Series Masterlist

TLOU WORLD 2023

SILVER LAKE, COLORADO TO SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH – A FEW WEEKS LATER…

The cool breeze of the evening brushes against your face as you sit on the porch of the farmhouse, strumming the strings of the guitar Joel now treasures. The people of Jackson have embraced you warmly, welcoming you back into their community. The topic of the Fireflies remains unspoken, a shared understanding between you and Joel. It lingers in the background, a memory that only surfaces when necessary.

Life in Jackson has brought a sense of normalcy, a semblance of the life you had before the chaos consumed the world. But this time, it's different. This time, you feel like you belong, like you are loved. The little family you've formed with Joel and Ellie has found solace within the walls of this farmhouse. As the seasons pass by, a routine settles in, and the farmhouse pulses with life, as if it has its own heartbeat.

The bugs begin to retreat once again, signaling the transition from summer to autumn. You find yourself on the porch, the guitar resting gently on your lap. It was a gift for Joel, a token of appreciation and love, but it also earned you a playful scolding. Joel made it clear that you should never leave Jackson without informing him first. It was a testament to his protectiveness, a reminder of the bond that has grown between you.

At this moment, the world seems so simple. The rush of blood through your veins transports you back to your youth, when fear and uncertainty were distant notions. Seventeen again, you find yourself unafraid of death, daring to dream once more. The curve of the valley before you holds a profound meaning. Happiness emanates from within as you gaze at the serene surroundings.

As the words echo in your mind, they bring a smile to your face. Joel's voice resounds in your memory, "I'll never let you go." Those five words hold a depth of emotion, a promise that transcends the hardships you've endured. In this tranquil moment, you realize that you have found a home, a place where love and safety intertwine. You are content, knowing that Joel is by your side, ready to face whatever challenges may come.

The future may hold uncertainties, but for now, you bask in the stillness, cherishing the connection that binds you and Joel together. The world may be broken, but within the embrace of this farmhouse, you have found solace, love, and a renewed sense of purpose. And as you continue to strum the guitar, the notes reverberate through the air, carrying the harmony of your newfound happiness into the world.

Lost in the nostalgic melody, you find yourself humming a tune that holds a special place in your heart. The tranquility of the moment is interrupted by the gentle reminder that you're wearing one of Joel's shirts, two sizes too big. It's a simple gesture, a symbol of the closeness you share, but it also serves as a reminder that nothing is certain in this world. Doubts linger, even as you begin to feel at home.

The passing year has been arduous, and its weight lingers in your mind. The slow progress makes you question if you're truly moving forward. Trust is a scarce commodity, earned by only a select few. The scars etched upon your bodies, remnants of battles fought in your youth, serve as a constant reminder of the dangers that persist. And yet, the revelation of a collapsing sun and rising seas, of crumbling buildings, brought about a new understanding of the fragility of existence.

As you continue strumming and humming, Joel stands by the door, captivated by the beauty that radiates from you. The sun begins its descent on the southern horizon, casting a warm glow on the scene. Unable to resist any longer, Joel quietly approaches, his footsteps barely audible. He wraps his arms around your waist, his presence causing you to giggle. His lips press against the side of your neck, the scruff of his chin tickling your skin.

"Joel!" you playfully chide, a mixture of surprise and delight in your voice. He responds with a hum, his voice filled with affection, "My sweet Birdie..."

You quickly place the guitar on the side, and in that tender moment, you realize that despite the uncertainties and doubts that surround you, you have found a sanctuary in each other. Joel's embrace offers a sense of security, a refuge from the storms that rage outside. You feel a rush of gratitude for the love you've found amidst the chaos, and a renewed determination to protect what you hold dear.

Basking in the warmth of Joel's affection, you turn your head to meet his gaze, curiosity tugging at your thoughts. "How was the patrol today?" you inquire, wanting to know about the world beyond the safety of Jackson's walls. 

Joel plants gentle kisses on the side of your head, your cheek, and finally on your lips, his love conveyed through each tender touch. His gaze locks with yours, his southern accent subtly peeking through as he responds, "Today was good, darlin'. Nothin' for your pretty head to worry about."

A sense of relief washes over you, knowing that for at least one day, the dangers that loom outside haven't posed a threat. But your thoughts naturally drift to Ellie, the young woman who has become an integral part of your lives. You can't help but bring her up, knowing that Joel's bond with her is unbreakable.

"What about Ellie? How's she doing?" you ask, genuine concern lacing your words. Ellie's resilience and determination have become a source of inspiration, even amidst the darkest of times.

A soft smile tugs at the corners of Joel's lips as he replies, his voice filled with fondness, "Ellie's holdin' up. Been keepin' busy, learnin' new skills, and takin' care of herself. She's got that fire in her, just like you."

The mention of Ellie's fiery spirit brings a wave of admiration. You can't help but feel proud of her growth, of the strength she embodies. In this broken world, the relationships you've forged hold immense importance, anchoring you to hope and reminding you of the enduring power of love.

Nestling closer to Joel, you rest your head against his chest, the steady beat of his heart a soothing lullaby. "I'm glad she's finding her way," you murmur softly, your voice filled with genuine affection. "We're lucky to have her in our lives."

Joel's arms tighten around you, his voice brimming with tenderness as he responds, "Ain't that the truth, darlin'. We're blessed to have each other, and no matter what comes our way, we'll face it together."

Feeling a surge of love for Joel, you lift your head from his chest to meet his gaze. The twinkle in his eyes tells a story of unwavering devotion, and a mischievous grin plays upon his lips. You can't help but become enveloped in his warmth, finding solace in his presence.

"I don't tell you enough, Joel," you begin, your voice filled with sincerity, "but you mean the world to me. I love you.”

Joel's expression softens, his gaze locked with yours. He brushes a strand of hair away from your face, his touch gentle yet purposeful. "You know, darlin'," he replies, his voice slightly husky, "you mean the world to me too. There ain't a day that goes by where I don't thank my lucky stars for bringin' you into my life."

The vulnerability in Joel's words tugs at your heartstrings, and you lean in, pressing a tender kiss against his lips. It's a gentle affirmation of the love that binds you together, a silent promise of forever.

As you pull back, a playful glimmer dances in Joel's eyes. "You know," he says, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, "I reckon I'm the luckiest man alive. Not only do I have the most beautiful person by my side, but I've also got a hell of a good kisser."

His words elicit a giggle from you, the sound filling the air with pure joy. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you whisper, "Flattery will get you everywhere, Mr. Miller."

The two of you settle into a comfortable silence, relishing the closeness and the unspoken language of love that flows between you. With each passing moment, the world outside fades into insignificance, leaving only the warmth and tenderness of this intimate connection.

A gentle breeze rustles the leaves overhead, the delicate dance of foliage creating a symphony of nature. Your fingers entwined with Joel's, each touch a testament to the warmth and tenderness that envelops you in this serene moment.

In the ambient glow of the evening, the air pulses with an almost tangible affection. The space between you and Joel becomes a canvas painted with an unspoken promise that transcends the limitations of words. In the delicate interplay of shared vulnerabilities and profound love, you find a sanctuary where the concept of time fades, replaced by the eternal embrace of this connection.

In this fleeting instance, bathed in the gentle twilight, you take solace in the richness of your conversation. Despite the shadows that loom from past events and the uncertainties that await, the presence of Joel beside you becomes a steadfast beacon, guiding you through the dimly lit corridors of life.

The embrace continues, a dance of shared whispers and laughter, a rhythmic exchange that weaves together the tapestry of your lives. Amidst the harshness of the world, the cocoon of your love becomes a refuge, a source of strength, and a testament to the formidable power of unity.

Yet, beneath the surface of this idyllic scene, a quiet ache persists, a shadow that lingers in the corners of your consciousness. There are nights when Joel lies peacefully asleep beside you, unaware of the storm that rages within your mind. In those quiet hours, memories materialize, hazy and elusive, casting a spectral glow on the canvas of your thoughts.

You can see him on the porch, the soft strains of a guitar accompanying the melancholic melody of your recollections. The air is charged with the bittersweet echoes of a past that refuses to be forgotten. There are nights when tears silently trace the contours of your face, the weight of remembered endings pressing upon your heart.

Joel, the silent guardian at your side, remains oblivious to the tempest within. His presence is a comfort, but the specter of a different ending, an alternate narrative, leaves you restless in the quiet hours of the night. The story, once written in ink, now seems to bleed into the realm of what-ifs and what-could-have-beens.

And so, in the embrace of the night, you grapple with the dichotomy of love and loss, finding solace in the tangible warmth of Joel's presence, even as the ghosts of untold stories linger in the shadows.

TAGLIST:

@memento-mora @elijahssuit @tartiflvtte @lillylilly2 @kyuupidwrites @amethystwonder11 @syd-vixious @kidkrow666 @soulofapatrick @ponyboys-sunsets @superflymaterial @chaotic-imposter @vainbimbo @eva-stark @loki-an-idiot @littleshadow17 @undermoonlightwalk @afternoon-evening @notmysunnydale  @slurmp69 @gyllord @aerangi @mac5323 @friskynotebook @earth-to-lottie @chaotic-imposter @kodzuvk @hawkins-2000 @reallysparklychaos @trust-dreamcatcher @darkened-writer @memeorydotcom @welcomebackfelicia @rainbowpitofdoom @omg-its-typical-aesthetics-fan @marvelsimpcz @dorck26 @evienorville @munsons-queen @little-miss-bi @mxltifxnd0m @ohjoelmiller @coalix @taestrwbrry @avengersheart @gyllord @valentine-babe@missdragon-1 @ponyboys-sunsets @ipadkidsworld @otternanamilolo @issybee0611 @technicallysassyfox @cupcakemachete @manuchyy @darkened-writer @andyrazzledazzle @glossythor @virtueassassin @witchy-jadda @imonmykneessir @norr1e @mando-bix @thicficbich1 @adoringanakin @lalla-04p @reallysparklychaos @hollywoodmariposa @mando-bix @lunatic1012 @davosmymaster

[invisiblegarters]

The Heart Killers Ep 1

Man. I knew FOMO would get me eventually but I didn't think it would be this soon. Full disclosure, I read and hated the novel and that is a big part of why I didn't want to watch - I can already feel it coloring my opinion of the characters and trust me when I say that's not a good thing - but you know what? Fuck it. I find that I want to participate in the discussions and maybe even in the excitement for this show and I can't do that if I don't actually, you know. Watch.

Add that to the fact that almost all my shows are ending or just ended and it's a no brainer, really.

I mean, if I hate it that's what the off switch is for. No one is making me do this A Clockwork Orange style so I think it'll be okay.

Plus I can't sleep so here goes. THK ep 1. Liveblogged. Because why not, right? *cracks knuckles*

I am going to pretend I've never read the novel while I do this, so no spoilers.

You know it just occurred to me that I haven't even watched the first MV for this.

Pfft I know Khao bulked up for this but he still looks like a twink. A twink with really nice arms.

Are they gonna have him honeypot people every episode? I could get behind that.

Okay I do really like the disgust on Bison's face when the target isn't paying attention. I also don't know Thai so I can't say for sure but the subtitles make it sound like he's being very polite before shooting this dude. I appreciate that.

Okay so. Fun fact no one cares about. I read once that if you're doing something you shouldn't, running away from someone, maybe even committing a crime, it's actually really smart to wear a really bright, eye catching thing somewhere on your person. Probably not a shirt, but like, a bright scarf or pair of shoes. Because that's where people's eyes will go. Not your face, but the bright fabric.

Oh my gosh I'm gonna love Style and Kant together I can already tell. Pffft @ Kant scoping out the room though. My dude.

I genuinely find it hilarious that Kant is sitting here going on about how he doesn't want to commit but he's basically gonna be forced into it this very ep.

This music is a lot.

Can Style and Kant have hooked up before please? It's a wish.

You know what? I absolutely do not blame Bison for shutting Kant down at first. Patronizing ass. You're pretty but that only gets you so far babes.

I'd seen (and reblogged) gifs of the whole foot slide get right on top of you thing but it's very very nice to watch. It woulda worked on me haha. Frankly I'm impressed that Bison has braincells left because I am not that strong.

Hahaha Fadel wanting to be mad but having to keep Style from actually looking at the damage to his car lest he spot the dead body (Fadel, honey, maybe a JEEP isn't the best transport vehicle for those you've assassinated) is very funny.

I really think I'm gonna like Style.

Bed's more comfy anyway Bison. I'm sure you can take over there. Lol.

OH I LOVE THIS SONG it was in OF too. Am i focusing on that so I don't start acting silly? Yep shut up don't look at me.

I will say I don't actually think that Kant cares about names. Seems more like he's used to getting one than not but he doesn't seem particularly bothered by the lack. Probably he's used to more clingy one night - oh, wow okay see again seen gifs but motion is different lol.

Playboy Kant probably can't stop thinking about Bison because he actually got up and left lol. Something tells me that that's not normal for him, the way everyone teases.

Aw I like him with Babe. I hope that there are a lot of scenes with them.

Taming of the Shrew is a bit on the nose, no?

One thing i will say about Jojo's shows. I always do find new music to listen to.

How old is Bison? Twelve? Or are we supposed to get that he's kind of a loose canon because it's one or the other and considering what he got up to the night before I'm betting it's the latter.

WHY does no one in these shows actually know how to stalk people properly my god.

Kant you yourself said you wanted someone to hit it and quit it, now you're acting like that's a problem (this is not stopping my player who doesn't enjoy being played theory lol but I bet he likes being played with if you know what I mean and I think you do). But woooow he is pretty in that suit and tie. My inability to take screenshots from gaga is very depressing right now. But then agian maybe not because it'd just be me thirsting for First and other people make better moving pictures for that.

Okay Captain Chris sir using bb bro against him is low. I approve.

"Here are some photos that I'm sure Bison didn't see being taken my dude hid so well out in plain sight."

Yes I am going to love Style who hasn't put on some music just to dance around when no one is watching? Also I need to stop talking about literally every scene or I'm gonna run into the word limit before I'm done.

DUN DUN DUUUUN. Aww Bison thought it was amazing that's sweet.

Sorry Bison your brother is busy being flustered by an obnoxious but inexplicably (to him anyway I get it) attractive mechanic.

Kant babe if I didn't know better I would definitely say this was love. No one sane would eat that burger.

Oh god the chewing noises no.

The way I cringed at them nearly kissing right there with the ghost of the disgusting burger still hanging around in Kant's mouth.

Bison, babe. Get you head out of your ass Fadel means kill you. I mean I do think you're closer to the mark than he is but not by as much as you think.

Fadel has a problem with life. I love him.

Okay part of me thinks that Kant is lying about the beach thing. Why? Becuase their interactions are very flirty and fun but...I'm not really getting too much of a smitten vibe from either of them like I thought (hoped? thought) there would be. I mean they're having fun for sure, and Kant at least is absolutely looking to score again, but...

Oh Fadel. Don't you know that the more you protest the more tempting Kant becomes for your brat of a brother?

Pretty sure you'd be making Bison more tempting for Kant too, he strikes me as the type to deliberately go after things he's warned off of.

Honestly maybe he and Bison really are perfect for each other.

Also if Fadel and Kant wanted to settle their differences by making out I would not say nay (they won't this isn't Only Friends but hey. You never know Jojo did give me a brief moment of SandTop).

SEE WHAT I MEAN FADEL. Would Bison have shown up with delicious burger if Fadel hadn't made such a fuss? Maybe, but I bet Fadel's fussing made it a certainty.

Ouch ouch I just rolled my eyes so hard at Kant's line I'm genuinely proud of Bison for not doing it. Blergh.

Oooh First looks so pretty in that yellow with his hair all fluffy in the breeze. Excuse me while I absolutely don't hear any of this no doubt important conversation.

I kind of love the music when Style comes in the restaurant lol. Fadel's worst nightmare has arrived.

LOL did Kant tell him to be this obnoxious or is this just how Style flirts?

Oh my god I think this is just how Style flirts.

Hahaha I wonder what kind of taking out Fadel thinks Style means.

Ah so we're definitely dong the Taming of the Shrew thing where Bianca has beer flavored nipples (yes I know that line was from 10 Things) . I'd wondered. I find the idea less annoying than I would have thought - the added element of Kant not being as head over heels as he claims helps. Might as well toss a little jealousy into the mix. I'm sure Bison will play it up as much as possible too - he definitely likes playing, and currently this is definitely more game than anything else for him. Curious what it'll look like if and when that stops.

So far Fadel and Style are my favorite though. I like their dynamic a lot. They're ridiculous in the best ways.

I thought I'd like Kant and Bison more but they're kind of leaving me cold right now. I know it's only one episode n but they're just kinda meh to me and I can't put my finger on why. Maybe it's that despite all the flirting neither of them means it. Whereas Style and Fadel's interactions, though more hostile (seriously what the fuck kind of flirting is belligerently drinking beer after beer in someone's restaurant while they glower at you) feel more real. I'm not averse to game playing, but honestly this is why I like this kind of thing in movies. Because I'm impatient and after an hour I'm ready to see some feeling, lol.

But also (and probably more truthfully): let this be a lesson to you about reading a novel adaptation of a show before the show is released. Part of my ambivalence towards these characters is absolutely coming from doing the stupid thing, sigh.

It's just sometimes there is a fire. And it's pretty and flickery and I want to stick my hand in without thinking about the heat.

[eurotowne]

Review: Live From Arena Stožice

can you tell i’m on winter break and have nothing better to do?

1) Sunny Side of London

• What can I sayyyyy! we’ve had this live version out for a while now and it’s probably the only JO song that I 100% prefer live. It’s MADE for a live performance, for an audience that will have fun with it and participate. Great opening choice too! 9/10

2) Gola

• Felt much more energetic than the studio version! Gola isn’t my fave but I definitely like it more now that we have this live version! 8/10

3) Bele Sanje

• I think the best part about Bele Sanje are the little nuanced things like the “lalalala” and some of the electronics which I can’t really hear in the live version BUT I can’t complain….I loved it, especially the extended guitar part at the end (which im assuming is Jan lol) and the boys going absolutely CRAZY on backing vocals!

4) Plastika

• THE TRANSITION FROM BELE SANJE TO THIS?!?! HELLO?!?? MY SOUL ASCENDED!!! I can hear all of the electronics and all of the energy! I love that you can obviously tell that Plastika is a fan favorite! Bojan’s emotion in this live version (especially on “ne morem se odločit al se jočem al smejim) just took it to the next level imo. 10/10

5) Proti Toku

•Not much to say about it, I think it’s definitely more fun than the studio version but it just seems quiet to me??? idk?? 8/10 tho, it’s still a banger

6) Dopamin

• THIS!!!! I LOVE LOVE LOOOOOOOOVE THIS!!! I see clips of Dopamine on tiktok or something and it sounds more aggressive than in the studio, and im SOOOOO glad it sounds that way here! It’s such a cute, happy song but it’s so…HARD! Guitars were going CRAAAAAAAAZY, but we could still hear some of the little electronic bits. Byfar some of the best sounds of the album. 20/10

7) Padam

• I cry, I cry every time. Love the audience in this one and Bojan’s voice?!?? angelic. 9/10

8) Demoni

• WE FINALLY HAVE THE DEMONI SCREAM ON STREAMING PLATFORMS! The ONLY thing I think you have been better was just volume, i don’t feel the impact as much in this song as i do in some of the others (which is not the case for the studio albums). Loved how they kind of slightly played around instrumentally with the beginning and the end. All my homies love Demoni. 10/10

9) Katrina

• Ok so…..Katrina is by far my favorite Joker Out song so by default, I think this version is great. There was a lot more tension this go around which, in my mind, fits nicely with the lyrics. HOWEVER…… I think I hyped this up too much in my mind. It was still very very VERY good (and the sheer quality of Jan’s solo was just impeccable, which is what I was hoping for), just missing something that I can’t really put my finger on. 10/10 tho, stream Katrina for clear skin.

10) A sem ti povedal

Ok ok ok hear me out . I am an A sem ti povedal binge streamer, the studio version is what I think musical perfection is. Every time i see a live performance of it, it’s always tweaked in some way, which hurts my little studio-loving heart. I’m not gonna lie and say the trumpet solo was bad or anything, in fact I thought it was quite beautiful, but I don’t think it should have taken the place of the heart-melting intro in the studio version. HOWEVER, I got over that pretty quickly, with the acapella introduction and the buildup into the A-MA-ZING bridge. Personally I think Bojan’s little changes to how sings this one really made a difference, especially since they went ahead and changed like….most of the song anyways. Still, i was transported to another dimension with this one even though I am still a pretty strict A sem ti povedal purist. 9/10

11) Omamljeno telo

Fun, Fun, Fun! One of my favorite JO songs! It almost felt too short! 9/10

12) Kot Srce, Ki Kri Poganja

Martin girlies WYA?!?! EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS WAS PERFECT! from ACTUALLY performing Kot Scre, to releasing it in the album, to the evergy, and ESPECIALLY to having Matic and Martin, who absolutely ATE THIS UP!!! Did anyone else become a Kot Srce, Ki Kri Poganja girlie after this? because I certainly did! 15/10

13) Metulji

• Upon seeing a 6 minute version of Metulji i was very excited. Figuring out that most of it was straight up guitar was definitely something that grew on me after a few listens. One of my favorite things about the studio version of this song is just HOW Bojan sings (it just scratches my brain) and it still does that in this album, and it’s even MORE emotional! Instrumentally, I LOOOOOVED the little tiny changes they made, it really was so beautiful, and also tense, and a little scary! it’s crazy what you can do with sounds. 10/10

14) Vse Kar Vem

•ALSKDSKDKFJ I LOVE THIS SONG!!!! I dont speak Slovene but I FELT EVERY SINGLE WORD!!! Ofc knowing the lyrics helps, and all of that just made me …FEEL! I WAS FEELING FEELINGS! I could feel the audience feeling feelings!!!! What I don’t see talked about enough is how Jure SLAYED that drum break like LORD HAVE MERCYYYYY. 10/10

15) Barve Oceana

• BRAVE Oceana absolutely killed me…but speaking of Jure absolutely eating the girlies up, the drum break in this was just PERFECT. Also I loooooved being able to hear Nace during the first few verses, I never realized the bass part was so fun! AND THE BACKING VOCALS? THE AAAAAAAA’s? PERFECTION! 10/10

mr. maček i love you

16) Ngvot

• KRIS GUŠTIN YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS! ALWAYS! We all knew he could throw down with the songwriting, and it’s just so nice to be able to hear him sing it too! Ngvot is a classic, nothing much to say about this live version! 8.5/10

17) Vem Da Greš

• also another OP fave here and another beautiful transition into this from Ngvot! Also not too much to say about this one other than I felt it wasn’t as impactful as the studio version, like the buildups were just for nothing because the actual hits were lacking power. Also the faint children’s choir-esque sound was throwing me off? I heard it it Metulji too and idk what it is! 8/10

18) Ne Bi Smel

• part 3 of Jure absolutely killing it. Now THIS was powerful! So much energy, especially compared to the already super-fast studio version. Bojan’s voice was definitely one of the highlights (it is in every song, but especially here!)!

19) Ona

• to be honest, i’m not rocking with this jazz band version of it. The sultry sax intro was a great addition, setting up the plot of the song and everything, but this big brass thing throughout the song was not it for me. I think what I love about the studio version is the angry electronic things we hear, and we do hear it here, but it’s almost cancelled out by the brass? idk man, it’s a song about crying your eyes out every night because of a girl and it just wasn’t feeling like that! 7/10, I still love Ona

20) Tokio

• The audience did their part in this one! Another great one, I have no complaints. 10/19

21) Umazane Misli

• God i love this one! I think this had the perfect amount of experimentation in it for the song to sound like itself while also feeling fresh. Personally i would have preferred if there were no mics or instruments on during the part with the girl’s voice and just had the whole audience sing the whole thing, but that’s just a stylistic, nitpicky thing lmao. 9.5/10

22) Novi Val

• I cried, i’m still crying. 15/10

23) Carpe Diem

• Carpe Diem NEVER fails! This was the absolute best song to close out with in EVERY way! It’s fun with a sappy ending that wraps up the album and the show perfectly. I would have sold all of my limbs to be there during that. 20/10

[xserenemeadowsx]

Unconditional Love (Chapter 5)

By xSereneMeadowsx

Link for Chapter 4: https://www.tumblr.com/xserenemeadowsx/719178293244493824/unconditional-love-chapter-4?source=share

A/N: Thank you everyone for the likes and follows! I really appreciate it! :) This past week was a little hard on me which is why I didn’t update for a week. This chapter is a little shorter than the others. I hope you all enjoy it!

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Chapter 5

The sun spread its rays out, greeting the world before it. The light shone down on all who slept beneath it, stirring the slumber each guest had. Eyes slowly opened and took in the scenery. Peach was the first to awaken. She got up and stretched her limbs. Soon, her companions joined her.

“Good morning,” Peach spoke in a sleepy voice.

“Morning,” the brothers and mushroom man replied.

“Did all of you sleep well?” the princess asked.

“As well as I could,” Luigi answered.

“It was alright,” Mario said.

“I slept well,” Toad replied.

“I slept well too,” Peach answered. “We best get breakfast together and get a move on. We aren’t too far from the Yoshi Kingdom now, but we still have a long road ahead of us.”

“I got you covered!” Toad exclaimed as he whipped out his skillet and various items of food.

“Great!” Peach said. She did enjoy Toad’s cooking a lot and she looked forward to what he would prepare for them.

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Y/N sighed as she sat in the cage eating her food. It really was not the most pleasant being held up in a cage. Not that the cage was too small, but it was exhausting. She wanted space to walk around in, a nice bed to sleep in, and a wardrobe of different clothes. She’d been stuck in the same outfit for about two days now. She wondered how people at home were reacting to her absence. She was sure she was going to be fired from her job at this point. She mentally groaned at the thought of losing her job.

She didn’t have her cellphone with her either. She felt stupid not bringing it with her. Then again, service probably wouldn’t work out here either. She finished her breakfast and curled her legs into herself, knees propped up. She rested her arms across her knees, setting her chin down on top of her wrists.

‘It’s fun writing a song, but…what is the point in writing this song? He knows Peach doesn’t like him and this song probably won’t make a difference to her. No matter how much heart and soul you put into it, it seems pointless in the end…’ Y/N couldn’t help having these thoughts swarm through her mind. She’d been hurt before and as much as she wasn’t enjoying Bowser’s presence for the most part, she didn’t want to see him hurt. She felt that everyone deserved to find love with a special someone where the feelings are reciprocated amongst the two people involved in said relationship.

Just as she was going to continue pondering more, the doors of the throne room opened and in walked Bowser with Kamek.

“Songwriter! Ready to start the day?” Bowser asked as he stared up at Y/N.

“Sure,” Y/N replied softly.

Kamek worked his magic at getting Y/N out of the cage and transporting all of them to the music room. He immediately left the king and human alone in the music room. Bowser and Y/N made their way to the piano bench and sat down.

“I was thinking that we could start off the song with, ‘Peaches, I have a song just for you. Please lend me your ear to hear these words.’” Bowser said.

Y/N was slightly dazed out, “Oh! Uh, sure...that works.”

The Koopa King could read Y/N’s appearance, “You’re not focused. I need you to stay with me on this. I want to get this song out to Peaches soon.”

“Sorry…Guess I have a lot on my mind…” It wasn’t a lie. Y/N couldn’t stop pondering over if everything they were doing had any point to it or not.

“Well, get your mind out of the clouds and back on this song,” he demanded. “What line should we add after that?”

“Hmm…we could add, ‘I hope this finds you well because the sight of you makes my heart swell. Your kindness and care are like birds soaring in the air. I feel at ease and weak in my knees when I see you.’ We could add in the chorus after that where you say Peaches, I love you if that sounds good,” Y/N said.

“Yes. Following that, the descriptions of her hair and eyes could come in.” Bowser smiled, “‘Your dark blue eyes make the stars shine at night. Your hair is the sunshine of my mornings when I awake.’”

“Yeah, and then maybe after that, ‘I hope you see how much you mean to me. Peaches, your sweetness is like candy for my teeth. You make my heart sing with love for you. I want to be your right guy for all of time.’ Then, we could go back to the chorus again. Sound good?” Y/N asked.

“Yes. After the chorus, maybe a few other lines…” Bowser carefully thought over what else could be added in. He did want to emphasize his promise to love her, “How about this, ‘We may have our differences, but this I promise you. I will love you for all of time unconditionally my sweet. No matter the obstacles that come our way, I will make sure to treasure each day with you.’ Then, we go back to the chorus,” Bowser said.

“Wow, that all sounds great! Let’s hear it played out on the piano!” Y/N said. She was impressed by those lines.

Bowser, ecstatically, began the tune on the piano and sang out the words he and Y/N came up with. The scenery in the room changed once again to the scenery of the waterfall and grassy field. Y/N smiled at the scenery change. She quite enjoyed the peaceful atmosphere. She saw Bowser gaze at the picture of Peaches on the piano as he sang his heart out. She stared at him and could tell he really felt good about what was being sung out.

The piano finished its last note along with Bowser and the king turned to look at the songwriter who currently still looked at him, “Well Songwriter?”

Y/N, who had become lost in her gaze, snapped out of it, “Huh? Oh! Yes, the song. I really like it. I think the princess will too.” The song was lovely and very captivating. She truly hoped that his heart wouldn’t be too broken or broken at all.

Bowser had taken notice of how Y/N stared at him. He was a bit flustered, but he found it nice that someone was paying attention to him when he was singing his heart out. Y/N really helped him out with this song, and he was grateful for it. He couldn’t get her voice out of his mind last night for quite some time. Her voice was like a sweet lullaby and when her (eye color) looked at him, it made him feel good.

“Um…did you hear me Bowser? I said I like the song,” Y/N waved her hand in front of him to get his attention. Why was he so dazed out all the sudden?

“Hmm? Oh, yes. Glad you like it,” Bowser said, coming back to reality. “I want to show it the princess in the next couple of days. I think some practice is in order first.”

“Yeah, that’s understandable,” Y/N said.

“Now that you have helped me, I’ll have Kamek take you back to the cage,” Bowser said.

Y/N really didn’t want to go back into the cage, “Is it possible for me to…to have a room instead? Please?”

Bowser looked into her eyes and thought, ‘I suppose I could give her a room. She did well in helping me. Then again though, what is the point in keeping her still? She’s already done her part…but she could be used as leverage. Yes, I’ll keep her for that.’

“I suppose so…” he answered. “Kamek!”

The wizard in calling instantly appeared in the room, “Yes Sire?”

“Give Y/N a room. She deserves an upgrade in accommodations for helping me out,” Bowser spoke.

“Of course,” Kamek responded. “Come with me this way.” He ushered Y/N out of the room.

Y/N turned to look at the king, “Bowser, thank you.” She smiled kindly at him. She was happy at least that she was going to have a room.

Bowser only nodded and turned back to the piano, the background in the room slowly changing back to its original appearance. His heart was full of joy. This song was going to woo over the princess no problem. He began to play the tune again and sing the song as he gazed at the picture of Peaches.

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Y/N and Kamek walked all over the castle and Y/N took in all the different paintings that hung on the walls. Many of them were of lava sceneries, but there were a few of Bowser himself. He would look intimidating, cunning, and…lonely. She could understand the loneliness she saw in some of the paintings. He truly wanted a companion and he had been set on the princess for so long that he felt he had no other options.

“Over here will be your room,” Kamek said as they came upon two large red doors.

Y/N turned in the direction Kamek pointed to and followed him inside the room.

“I can design this in any way you please,” the wizard said. “Just say what you want to have in here.”

“Wow! Thanks! Um…I would like to have a queen-sized bed and a wardrobe with different clothes in it. Also, a nice size bathroom with a shower and tub please,” Y/N said as her eyes glowed in glee.

“Very well,” Kamek answered. He waved his wand and instantly, everything Y/N asked for appeared. The wardrobe was a blue color mixed with white and stood tall. Y/N immediately went to the wardrobe to peer inside it. The amount of clothes was endless and of various colors. The shoes included. Even jewelry could be found.

“It’s all so beautiful! Thank you Kamek!” Y/N said as she gave the wizard a hug. Realizing what she was doing, she bashfully let go of the wizard who was very flustered from the appreciation, “Uh, sorry…thank you.”

Kamek cleared his throat, recovering from the moment, “You’re quite welcome. Enjoy.” He walked out and closed the doors.

“This is the biggest bedroom I’ve ever had! I love it!” Y/N went toward the bed and sat down on it. It was very soft. The bed cover matched the blue of the wardrobe and the white sheets beneath it were very nice. The pillows were plush and comfortable too. She then got up to look inside the bathroom. White greeted her everywhere. The shower was a nice size, and the tub was practically like a hot tub with how large it was. She was satisfied to get an upgrade. She decided to jump into the shower and then change clothes.

The hair and body wash provided had the scent of cherry blossoms which Y/N didn’t mind. She worked on cleaning herself and used a white, fluffy towel to dry herself off. Walking to the wardrobe towel wrapped, she looked inside to see which outfit she would choose to wear.

“Hmm…how about this blue dress. I already like the shoes and jewelry that go with it,” she said to herself.

She put on a sleeveless blue dress and flat blue sandals. The dress was about knee length, and it made her think of the summer season. Blue flower earrings, bracelet, and necklace adorned her as well. The dress came to just above her chest to help show off the necklace that rested on her skin. She decided to leave her hair down since she had had it up for so long. Y/N smiled at her appearance. She was happy there was a full-length mirror in the closet too. She decided she would take a walk around the castle. Now that she wasn’t confined, she wanted to take this time to see more of the castle before her.

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Bowser played the final note in the song and sighed. He had already been practicing for a couple of hours and figured he needed a break. He got up from the bench and stretched his limbs. He walked to the doors, opening them with ease and decided to take a stroll inside his castle. Each koopa that passed by would carefully bow to him before they continued with their task or made their way to another destination. The king was happy that his koopas knew when to show him respect and always acknowledged him.

He rounded a corner and could hear a soft voice speaking.

“This food is delicious!” Y/N complemented to the koopa dressed in an apron and chef’s hat. He had given her a sample of what appeared to be a brownie to try.

“Thank you! I’m glad you like it! I hope the king will too,” chef replied.

“I think he will,” Y/N smiled. The chocolate was quite savory.

“Oh! Your majesty!” The chef bowed and Y/N curtsied.

“Songwriter, Chef,” Bowser said.

“I was just showing the human my new food. The recipe for it is easy to handle, but it takes time to bake these. I have a couple of samples left if you want to try it,” the chef explained as he held out a plate that contained a couple of other chocolate squares.

Bowser, using his claws, carefully picked up one of the brown squares and put it in his mouth. He chewed, swallowed, and smiled. The burst of chocolate hit his tongue in a pleasant way, and he was impressed, “This is very good!”

The chef smiled, “Thank you your majesty!” He bowed once again.

“Make more of these!” Bowser said.

“Right away your highness!” The chef replied as he scurried off to the kitchen.

“What exactly are you doing out here?” Bowser asked with suspicion.

“I was just taking everything in. Sightseeing. Is that alright?” Y/N asked. She hoped he wouldn’t be too mad about that.

Bowser raised a brow at her, “Fine, but you’re not going anywhere else alone. I will accompany you.”

“Uh, okay. Sure,” Y/N replied. Guess he was still a little suspicious of her. “You could show me your favorite areas! If you want to that is.”

“Hmm…” Bowser thought it over. It couldn’t hurt anything right? It was just a tour, and he would be right there to ensure she didn’t try anything like escaping on him. Even though Y/N didn’t seem like she was trying anything funny, he wanted to be weary of her. She intrigued him admittedly and he wanted to stick close to her. “Very well. This way.”

He began to lead the human down a long hallway that contained various rooms for meetings, games, and for focusing on knowledge of new worlds and new creatures. Bowser enjoyed exploring new places and thought it would be nice to have a room dedicated to storing all the knowledge he had found in some of his travels. He opened the door to the room containing all this information and Y/N’s eyes widened.

Never had Y/N seen so many books and journals in her life! It reminded her of the animated Beauty and the Beast movie with how high the shelves were, and the never-ending array of words and documents contained within.

“Wow! This library is like a history room! Historians would love a place like this if they could come here!” Y/N was impressed. She smiled as she gazed over the spines of the books lining the shelves. Various in terms of environment, people, and animals. “This all looks so interesting!”

Bowser turned to look at Y/N, “Really?”

“Yes! It really does! Do you have any books on galaxies?” she asked curiously.

“Uh…there’s very few and limited options, but yes,” Bowser replied. He was surprised at how fascinated this human was with his library. He couldn’t help but give a small smile. Her curiosity and amazement were cute.

He showed her where the galaxy section was and took out a book for her, “This book talks about the different stars and their shapes.”

“Oh! Like constellations!” Y/N beamed.

“Yes,” Bowser softly chuckled. “Here.” He handed the book to her.

She opened the book and was greeted with a constellation shaped like a heart, “Aw! That’s amazing! I don’t have any constellations like this in my world. How cool is it to see a heart shaped constellation?!”

“Very,” Bowser replied. “There’s plenty more pictures in here.”

“Great! I want to look at all of them!” Y/N said excitedly. There was a large red couch in the room which Y/N quickly sat down on. Bowser followed suit.

The king and songwriter spent a long time talking about the pictures found in the book along with what was written down about the stars themselves. Y/N felt like a kid taking in all this knowledge from Bowser. It was refreshing to see a side of Bowser that wasn’t intimidating. He seemed very mellow with everything, and Y/N enjoyed that.

“This constellation is my favorite,” Bowser pointed to the picture. The constellation was shaped like a crown.

“It is a neat one! What, makes it your favorite?” Y/N asked.

“It’s my favorite because it reminds me of me. I am a king and ruler to all before me. I am the greatest being to exist,” Bowser said with vigor.

“Ah, I see,” Y/N smiled. “You exude a lot of self-confidence.”

“That I do,” Bowser agreed. “Do you have a favorite constellation?”

Y/N wasn’t expecting him to throw that question at her, “Um…I don’t have any from my world. From this book though, I’ll say the heart.”

“Why the heart?” Bowser asked.

“Because it reminds me of the love I have from family and friends,” Y/N chuckled. “I know that sounds cheesy and very cliché, but it’s true.”

Bowser laughed, “Indeed, but it’s not bad.”

“Thanks,” Y/N smiled. Her stomach decided to speak up. Bashfully, she covered it, her face reddening slightly.

“Hmm…sounds like someone is hungry,” Bowser said amused. “We can have lunch now.”

Y/N, embarrassed, chuckled, “Great!”

The two went to put the book away and walked out of the room to go to the dining room. Y/N was happy that she got to see a softer side to Bowser. She felt that it was a rare, and probably, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see such a side to him. It was unexpected but welcomed to her.

Bowser felt himself softening some in Y/N’s presence. He didn’t feel as weary of her, but still wanted to keep his guard up. He enjoyed seeing her take in all the work he and his koopas had done with the library. He was pleased that he could have such a conversation with someone about his work too.

The two of them made it to the dining room and it was large. Y/N’s mouth dropped open at the size of it. Then again, thinking about it, it would make sense for this room to be as large as it is. There were a lot of people in the castle. They all had to eat at some point, right? Y/N was going to sit down at the far end when Bowser signaled for her to keep walking with him toward the other end of the table. Y/N followed, and Bowser gestured for her to sit down on his right side, next to his seat.

“Uh, is this really alright?” Y/N felt a bit awkward sitting next to him.

“Of course, it is. Plus, I must keep my eye on you,” Bowser said smirking.

“Even with eating?” she asked slightly amused.

“Especially with eating,” he replied with a smirk. This was a nice play of banter.

The two of them laughed. Y/N, again, wasn’t expecting this side of Bowser. It was nice that he could be so playful.

Bowser liked hearing Y/N’s laugh. It was as melodious as her singing. He gave her a small smile to which Y/N blushed a little in return. He shook his head. What was he doing? He should only be acting this way with and toward Peaches. Why was he doing this with the songwriter?

“Lunch is served,” the chef from before called out as he and a few other koopas came to set plates of various food down.

Y/N smelled some of the food in front of her, “Mmm…smells good!”

Bowser picked up his silverware and began eating and Y/N followed suit. The two stayed silent, each enjoying the food before them and residing in their own thoughts.

Y/N couldn’t help noticing how Bowser behaved earlier with the shaking of his head. He had smiled at her and then she had blushed. It was just an innocent smile, right? Why did she blush then? Why was she thinking so much about this!? She had to quit thinking about that and just reminisce about her time with him in the library. It was nice to see him relaxed and not uptight.

Bowser couldn’t get Y/N’s blush out of his mind. He found it cute. He didn’t know what got into him to do the playful banter and give her the smile, but he did it. He didn’t know what was coming over him. Perhaps it was because of the nice time they had together earlier? That had to be it. That most definitely was it. He wanted to focus on doing more practice of the song for Peaches and he decided he would do just that after eating.

The king and human finished their meals and Bowser had Kamek walk Y/N back to her room. As all three exited the dining room, Y/N turned to Bowser.

“Thank you for earlier and for the meal. It was all so nice,” Y/N smiled at him. Her face was slightly reddened.

“You’re welcome,” Bowser replied rather gruffly. He found her blushing smile sweet, and he didn’t want that to distract him.

Y/N noticed his tone of voice but decided to not think so much about it now. She and Kamek walked back to her room while Bowser went to his piano room.

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“Phew! It’s hot out here!” Mario said as he took his hat off to try and fan himself.

Luigi did the same as Mario. Toad was using his hands to fan himself while Peach walked with an umbrella held in her hand. They all made it to the Yoshi Kingdom at last. The tropical like area was very humid. Thankfully, the four of them spotted some shade from some trees up ahead.

“Let’s take a breather here,” Peach said as she sat down to lean against a large palm tree trunk.

The others nodded in agreement and joined her at the tree. All of them sat with their backs against the tree trunk, breathing a little heavily. Peach closed her eyes and laid the umbrella to the side of her, hands resting in her lap. The walk took a little longer than expected, but they all had finally made it.

“Well, I hope catching the Yoshies won’t be too difficult,” Mario said.

“Same,” Luigi replied.

“I don’t think it should be too bad,” Peach said. “We have to find some of their favorite fruits, feed it to them, and then we can catch some for ourselves.”

“It should be a cinch,” Toad said confidently.

“Let’s hope so. For now, let’s rest a little longer,” Peach replied.

The four of them continued their rest as the sun shone high above them. The shade was cooling and refreshing at least.

‘Please be alright Y/N,’ Peach thought.

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Soft piano music played as the king played a different tune. He had practiced Peaches’ song for a little while, but then decided to play something else. He felt like playing a classical tune. Something that could be heard as joyful, hopeful, and fulfilling. He couldn’t remember the name of the song. Only its tune and notes. His clawed fingers hit each key with precision and many years of practice. It had been several months since last playing this song, but he remembered it fondly.

This song was shown to him by his piano teacher many years ago. The teacher was very sophisticated and took her time teaching her students how to play the piano correctly. Bowser faintly smiled, recalling the times he had messed up in front of his teacher and her scolding him to play the same notes again until he got it right. He hated that, but it was all worth it in the end. The piano provided an escape for him. It was something that would always remain the same. Something that could take in his emotions whether good or bad.

As he continued the tune, he looked at the picture of Peach and smiled. He wished she could be right here listening to him play. As he imagined her sitting on top of the piano in her signature pink dress, the image of her slowly began to change. The dress went from pink to blue. Her hair color changed from blond to (hair color). Her eyes changed from blue to (eye color). The smile changed from a small one to a grin.

Seeing the new image of Y/N sitting on the piano instead of the princess, Bowser shook his head violently and stopped playing the piano. Why did Y/N suddenly appear replacing Peaches? He sighed and closed the lid of the piano and got up. He needed to lay down and rest his eyes for a while. That was it. He was tired.

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Y/N lay in her bed and stared up at the ceiling. She really hoped to be able to explore more of the castle tomorrow. Maybe even go outside of it. If she was going to be here for a long period of time, she wanted to take in all the scenery around her. She wanted to explore more of the library again too. There was so much she could learn about the world she currently resided in. Her thoughts then went back to Peach and the others. She hoped they all were doing okay. She also hoped that Peach wouldn’t be too…disgusted at the song from Bowser. She and Bowser had worked a lot on the song.

Y/N felt that Peach probably wouldn’t like the song, but she hoped she wouldn’t be horrified by it. She just knew Peach wasn’t too keen on being with Bowser. That’s why she heavily emphasized to Bowser not to exude force onto the princess. It is never a good thing to force a love that isn’t there. She really didn’t want to see Bowser’s heart break.

The images of her own heart break came to mind. It made her want to sing the song Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy. It was a sad song, but it expressed some of what Y/N had gone through in her past relationship. She really thought that the guy she was with was going to be her lover. A tear streamed down her face, and she quietly began to sing the song to herself.

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Bowser was heading toward his room when he could hear soft singing coming from one of the passing rooms. He instantly recognized it to be Y/N’s voice. She sounded sad and almost as if she were on the verge of tears. He quietly walked to the door and put his ear against it. He listened to her sing the obvious heartbroken words of a past lover.

He wondered what could’ve brought Y/N’s mood down so suddenly. She seemed so chipper earlier. Why is she sad now? He decided to ask her later. He figured it would be best to leave her alone for now. Plus, he wanted to rest his eyes for a while. He needed/wanted to get his priorities straight. His focus was to impress Peach with his song and make her fall in love with him, not Y/N. Y/N was not to interfere with his plans. She already completed her part. She just needed to act the part of the hostage now.

Link for Chapter 6: https://www.tumblr.com/xserenemeadowsx/723682924934873088/unconditional-love-chapter-6?source=share

[otenvs3000f23]

Hello everyone, 

I hope you are all enjoying our last few days of the beautiful autumn weather – certainly my favourite season, so I’ll be sad to see it go! 

I am not much of a musically inclined person, I never even learned how to read music in school! Nonetheless, I absolutely love listening to music, if you are anything like me, I have about a million different playlists for various moods, ‘vibes’, and activities on my Spotify. My family is in Vancouver, so I spend a good amount of time in the mountains, and I always find myself listening to ‘folky’ and rock songs that embody the whole “granola-girl” aesthetic whenever I am out there (I find it funny how I rarely listen to that playlist when I’m in Ontario). In my opinion, nature interpretation is all about gaining an appreciation for nature and being fully present and in tune with it. Listening to the music of the trees blowing in the wind, birds chirping, and the crunching of leaves beneath your feet is probably the best kind of music for being present and one with nature. Still, if I had to pick a genre of music that spoke to me most while outdoors – or elicited a feeling of being fully present – it would have to be contemporary classical music. The absence of lyrics allows my mind to take in all the beauty around me. The calming melody of the classical instruments kindles the sense of “presentness” that I find so important about being outdoors – and in any aspect of life. In the same way photos and social media can push for immediate interpretation (as stated in the textbook), I would argue that music has the ability to transport you to another realm of awareness and presence, one where you can tune out some of your incessant thoughts that consume your day, and one that can evoke feeling and emotion. I think it’s super cool that we humans aren’t the only species who communicate through music, for example, think of whales or birds, even insects have the ability to feel rhythm! There is a reason music can induce great emotion and memory, it is ingrained in our history as a species and we wouldn’t have it if it weren’t for nature and our great ancestors evolving animal vocalization into the sounds of music we hear today. If I had to pick some songs that transport me to a space where I can be fully immersed in nature – sticking with my contemporary classical genre – the following are what I would recommend: 

Sunken Dreams by Alban Claudin & Esther Abrami

Minerva by Akira Kosemura

Avril 14th by Aphex Twin, Daniel Hope, Jacques Ammon, Christoph Anacker, Jane Berthe, and Kaiser Quartett

I look forward to hearing what you have to say about this week's prompt because I sort of struggled with it haha!

All the best,

Olivia

[katiemparks]

Letters I'll Never Send

Dear The Boy,

I don't know why but for years you have been an invisible passenger in my head. I say passenger because most of the time you show up is when I am driving around our home town (which we both still live in) alone listening to songs that somehow remind me of you even when I don't want them to.

I don't know why you're still here. I know i've thought about you a lot over the years and the thought of you and the talking through things with imaginary you has helped me learn a lot. Like... you triggered something dark in me. I though it was all your fault but the truth is that the darkness had always been there, but you made me feel so much, so deeply, that it brought it all to the surface. I know that now. I know it's not really your fault that I was crying every night, even though it was over you, I know you're not at fault for the self harm I inflicted upon myself all those years in high school.

I can see now after all these years removed that you were fighting that same darkness. I can see why you were hurtful to me sometimes. I can see now you probably thought you were saving me when you told me we could no longer be friends and to forget about you on graduation day. I can see your side but can you see mine?

Did you ever notice just how in love with you I was? Did you ever notice that you broke my heart more than once. You broke my heart so thoroughly when you said that on graduation day, right before the ceremony, in that music room, which was my safe place, in that soft voice. I didn't realize what had happened until it was over and you were gone. I had told myself I wouldn't cry over you again. I still did after that moment. I was happy. I was in a good, healthy relationship with the man I would eventually marry and love more deeply than I could have known in that moment. I had told myself that we were never meant to have that kind of relationship and that I was learning so much about life because of you even in that weird almost a thing but never a thing situationship we had. All of that is true.

I learned a lot about life, love, loss, relationships, myself, and more through those years and experiences you put me through. I don't regret them. I wouldn't take them back. Did it hurt? Like hell. Would I willingly bring that pain back into my life. Hell no. Would I do it again if I was magically transported back into my younger self with my memories still intact? Probably a bit differently, but yeah I'd live through it again. It made me who I am and I like who I am. It started me down a path that lead to the life I have now and I like the life I have now. I met my husband and true love of my life because my friend was worried about me, because of you, and got me away from you for a day and I met someone new and made a friend that has never broken my heart and has been a constant supportive love for me from that day on.

So, I wanted to say thank you for being a part of my life. Some parts of me still wish you were willing to be my friend. I want to show you I care. I want to show you that I still have a love for you that means I will always hope for the best for you. I want you to know that yes you broke me and my heart but I am ok now. I forgive you.

I think that is why you are my invisible passenger. This is a way I can show you i'm doing ok. The damage wasn't so severe that I can't move on. I'm not stuck in the past. I'm not stuck in the pain. This is a way I can safely show you my concern. This is a way I can safely show you my platonic love. This is a way we can coexist together as friends.

However, I do think it is time for you to move out. That moment we shared at our class reunion wasn't much. Just silently looking at each other for a few uninterrupted seconds. However, It helped me see that we had both moved on and this was the new normal. You've become somebody that I used to be friends with. You've slid all the way into that territory. I didn't fully accept that fact even though I was at peace with it. Now it is time.

This is a farewell to the invisible passenger. I want to move you out of my head to the state of being some guy I may write to when I feel like it.

Farewell Trevor. I am saying goodbye because it is time to move on and grow up. It is time to let the teenage moments that have long since healed move on so I can find my adult form. I've healed the inner child, I've healed my inner teenager. I want to step into the rest of my life as an adult.

Saying goodby makes me nervous. I worry that the moment I leave you alone you will fade from me forever, you tried that once already in the real world and it scared the crap out of me. Not the time you left me at graduation... the time you tried to leave the earth permanently and luckily your mother found you. I worry you will go through life thinking I hate you. I don't.

I remember a time when we were still close, maybe a bit too close. we were outside at a social gathering and talking about shooting stars. I had never seen one, you had seen loads that summer. We were laying on the ground hoping to see one. I was so happy in that moment. I felt a true connection and deep love for you. You were describing all the times you had seen these wonderful stars and I just listened. I loved the fact that most of all you would talk to me about something you loved. I loved that you listened to me. All those times in class when we should have been working but weren't because we were sitting across from each other and just wanted to talk. Those times we almost went deaf sitting in from of the drum set in the band section at football games and just creating nonsense conversations. I do not remember what we talked about other than Dr. Pepper, Oreos, our friends... but I will always remember how when you were focused on me I felt special.

You taught me so much. I know I said this before but I can not thank you enough. You taught me about love when I was so young I didn't even know what I was feeling. You taught me about pain before I had to experience the worst pain of my life. That was a benefit to me. I had some skills that kept me functioning in that time of loss because I had already practiced them with the loss of your friendship. You taught me about my inner darkness and how it lashes out sometimes and sometimes it reaches deep inside of me. I can manage it better now with the help of your memory and my fandoms.

With those lessons you helped me realize how lucky I am to have gone through so much so young. If I didn't have you, The Boy before The Husband, I probably wouldn't have trusted myself enough to be sure what I felt for him was love and if I hadn't married him I wouldn't be as happy as I am now because I wouldn't have a spouse who would have known my father and how great he was. I needed someone who would understand the level of grief I feel every day at losing such a powerful influence and source of light and love in my life. I needed him and you gave him to me and you gave me the confidence to know it was a true and good love I felt because I had loved you for so long so young. You helped me get the life and love I need. You helped me recognize it and not be afraid of it.

Something I want you to know, Lavon, is if you ever want to switch territories and become a friend again I will allow it and welcome you back with open arms and only love and understanding. I will respect your boundaries and stay out of your way, but if you find this... and you miss our friendship... just know I still love you, platonically, I still miss you. I do not hate you. I forgive you. I hope only the best for you. You deserve goodness and love and comfort. You have been through a lot, too much, and I understand that. Just know you are loved. Just know you deserve so much out of life and I hope you don't let your darkness and your cynicism of this world rob you from pure joy and love. Let those who love you love you. Let yourself love them in return. Don't be afraid to show those kinder emotions. You have a good heart. You have a kind spirit. You have a sweet smile. Let yourself be happy. Even when it is hard let yourself want love and joy and happiness. Be the best version of yourself. Be happy. Be content. Be yourself.

I will always remember our time together, the good and the bad, and everything that came from it. I will always remember you as you were in a happy light. I will remember Trevor and respect Lavon.

With love and hope,

-"Katie" M.....

[the-jellydex]

So generally, I have difficulties listening to jellyfish-related music if it is specifically about jellyfish or features a story about jellyfish.

I think I'm just too harsh, but I always end up judging the way jellyfish are portrayed (if I ever decide to cover the Octonauts' jellyfish episodes, you'll see what I mean)

Anyways, today I bring you Blu-Swing's Kurage (クラゲ) music video, a chill jazz fusion song about... well idk tbh (I even tried looking at the translated lyrics and they only confuse me more haha)

After watching the music video a few times, I gather that it's about a guy's pet jellyfish that becomes a human girl and I guess just does human things... anyways, here's my commentary:

I've actually... never seen jellyfish tanks like that in the video. They're really quite interesting ^-^! I love how they manage to get rid of the corners while still ultimately being square (using the space to add substrate that would most certainly kill/maim a jellyfish if it wasn't divided by glass haha)

That guy??? Tapped on the glass???? Like, jellyfish probably aren't as affected by glass tapping as other fish are BUT YOU'RE STILL SCARING THE POOR BABY ;(... have some respect pleaseee

Moon jellyfish are not bioluminescent, but anything is possible with magic I guess

I think the jellyfish girl's outfit is cute ;), it's wonderfully puffy and flowy.

It's clear her touch is venomous, which is... AMAZING :)! I mean, that guy must be a total wuss if her moon jellyfish venom was enough to hurt him but STILL. No physical contact.... that's like, the dream.

This isn't jellyfish related but I just think blu-swing brand water is great. She should be drinking a lot more of it though because as a former jellyfish she should have a higher standard of hydration...

What's the part with the lemon??? Does it have something to do with the misconception that jellyfish stings are electric...? :(. I'm sad. Instant points off. I'm not really rating this song or anything but maybe I should be having a jellyfish accuracy index

also physical contact sucks why would a former jellyfish of all organisms desire it? I mean... I guess they are a swarming species, but contact with things other than other moon jellyfish is usually an undesirable sensation, especially for an organism that's 95% water and something as small as a bubble is potentially fatal

It's cute that the jellyfish girl wanted to support her friend at his gig, but I'm curious... what exactly did happen at 9pm? Did she turn back into a jellyfish? Did she become a human forever? What???

Idk what the magic was on that guy but it was blue AND HE MADE A WHALE I THINK?? DID YOU KNOW BALEEN WHALES EAT JELLYFISH???? That's just insensitive smh

ok last point and that's... I don't think jellyfish would be happy to be turned into a human like we kind of suck. We only have 2 eyes at the front of our body (instead of 8 rhopalia surrounding the bell), our standard of hydration is a LOT lower (like, 75% i think as opposed to 95%?) so they'd feel like a desert lol, our mode of transportation is more accurate yes but it's a far cry from the natural swimming behaviours of a real jellyfish, how would they deal with sentience? Skin? Hair???? Fingernails? Limbs? A mouth AND an butt? If jellyfish are turned into humans I think we should seriously consider how different our biologies are because a jellyfish would NOT have a good time being human.

And um... Yeah :)! That's it ^-^. Next up on this series of Kurageru I'll either cover the Octonauts' portrayal of jellyfish or Amatsuki's song 海月 ("Kurage")

[cinoman]

everytime you recall a memory you alter it

heard about this from tiktok and i recently started crafting a huge boygroup playlist to accompany my girlgroup playlist (proud kpop stan since 2015) i originally stanned BTS, when they started coming up on the news (probably a year or so(?) after i got into them) i completely lost interest, didnt really listen to their music anymore... though the new stuff i was hearing really disagreed with me (every 3rd gen kpop stan knows the difference between old bts and new bts, theyre worlds apart T_T)

anyways, i actually went back and listened to some of the old bts songs i loved. im talking about classics like one more day and older bsides like tomorrow and hold me. all of a sudden i felt transported back to those days when i was walking to middle school and tracing hangeul characters in my jacket pocket so i could remember them this is why i always roll my eyes whenever ppl want to argue that kpop is "just a genre" (besides the fact its an entire industry). kpop is a time belt, it's a centralized way to keeping track of the growth in your life. suddenly you're old, realizing that songs you loved came out 10 years out, and you reminisce on the stupid concept back then and the fact that the people you were such a big fan of were also young at that time. and now, you're both older and different from when you both existed at that time. anyways, back to the song stuff, i really dont want to overwrite the memories ive made with those songs, they bring me back to a place i have barely any documentation of besides some old journals i used to learn korean i feel super disconnected to BTS now, i have other groups that have marked my transition from a small middle schooler to a grown ass college student and honestly i feel like my relationship with 4th gen groups kind of symbolizes how much ive grown up. no matter what, when i listen to older kpop songs, i feel like a little girl again going crazy over some 93-97년생 오빠들 and feeling excited to see what they did next. in a way ill always look at the idols during that period with fresh eyes(?) because i was so ignorant to what being an idol entailed and my heart only remembers the magic of that period. feeling real jealousy and excitement to tears over them was fun while it lasted ive been getting into TXT recently just so i can have some fresh content since the groups i do keep close to my heart are ofc either slowly being inactive/members doing solo stuff/etc. TXT feels more my style compared to a lot of the other boygroups that 4th gen has given us. anyways, yeah, i can never be that little girl again LOL. the maknae is only a year and some months older than me, no matter what, it feels more like im watching my friends fuck around and live their adult life. i hated 4th gen so much when the transition started happening because it marked a time where i felt like i was "forced" to grow up, there was no longer unlimited groups for me to find where i could shamlessly fangirl because people were either 1-2 years older than me, my exact age, or younger. but, i didnt realize that the people i had grown up beside were still gonna be relevant lol anyways, im much more content now.

[gr1evance]

7, 11, 19, 20, 22, 26, 34, 37, 41, and H for Overlord :]

7. What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?

hmmm. not much honestly? he's completely changed himself and the world and the situation he's in so there's not a lot that reminds him of the past- which he already struggles to remember. though i think he finds the reminder of his wedding pretty nostalgic. but sometimes that comes with a dread he doesn't understand (not about the wedding itself)

11. What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

he tries not? to lie at least as much as he can avoid it? i'd say he's lying about being happy but he also genuinely thinks he is and i don't know if i'd consider it a lie if he thinks he's being honest. but anything he would have to lie about he does in pursuit of.. keeping himself or other people safe so i don't think it'd haunt him that much

19. What is their favorite number?

7 or 13 because they're my favorites. but he feels like a 13 kind of guy. but in actuality i think he'd say they're all his favorite

20. If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

something along the lines of uhhh "well, romantic love is when you like someone in a way where you wanna date them or kiss them or maybe even marry them!!! and familial love is when you like someone because maybe they raised you or they're your kid or you're siblings or you just have some kind of bond with them that's similar to any of those things!!!! and then sometimes you just like people!!! and that can mean you're friends or it can mean whatever you want really!!! it's different for everyone i think!!!!" yes he talks like that with the exclamation marks its important

22. How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? 

i honestly genuinely don't think he really gets jealous of anything? to him where he is is perfect and he doesn't want anything more. and when he's possessive it's usually out of fear or just because that's how he is

26. What is their preferred mode of transportation? 

uhh. well. airplane but that's because he's gay. but that's definitely not how he gets around the most just when he has to travel. cause of the ruler of the world stuff

34. How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt? 

oh he has guilt over things he can't even really remember anymore. that boy's gonna be guilty until he dies that's just the nature of a starb au. but he's convinced himself that he's not because again he thinks he's happy

37. Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)? 

i think he generally writes most things down and remembers that way but he does feel like the kind of guy to come up with a little song about it. he probably has some songs for remembering stuff

41. How do they feel about children? 

he would love to be a father but he knows himself enough to know that he shouldn't be.

H) What trait do you admire most?

uhm uhhh. well i feel like a lot of him Shouldn't be admired even though he's like a life fantasy for me LOL but. i mean it's impressive that he gets as much done as he does

[denimbex1986]

'Andrew Haigh began getting a sense of the knockout power of his new film, "All of Us Strangers," a few days after it premiered at the Telluride Film Festival.

"I'd run into people who had seen the film three days before. I'd be talking to them and they'd just start crying," Haigh says, laughing. "And I'm sort of both apologetic and quite glad that it shook them to their core."

Haigh, the 50-year-old British filmmaker of "45 Years" and "Lean on Pete," is accustomed to strong responses from his films. His 2011 breakthrough, "Weekend," about a tender but brief romance, is considered a landmark of queer cinema.

"That that film has had an effect will probably always be the thing that I'm most proud of," Haigh said in an interview earlier this fall when "All of Us Strangers" was playing at the New York Film Festival.

Yet Haigh's latest, which opens in limited release Friday, may be his most shattering. Andrew Scott stars as Adam, a lonely screenwriter who, while toiling on a script, is transported back to his childhood home where he finds his long-dead parents (Claire Foy, Jamie Bell) as they were when Adam was 12. At the same time, Adam is hesitantly exploring a relationship with a neighbor named Henry (Paul Mescal).

The result is something magical and mournful that draws profound connections between familial love and romantic love, between gay life and estrangement, and between a pair of strangers nursing shared wounds. For Haigh, who shot the childhood scenes in the home he grew up in, it was also highly personal.

"I was entering my past as Adam was entering his," Haigh says. "The whole process felt like a slightly expensive therapy session."

Here are edited excerpts from the conversation.

Q: This is the first time you've attempted something in a metaphysical realm. Was it daunting?

HAIGH: It was really daunting. When you set a film, everyone's like, "What's it like? What can you compare it to?" And I knew I was going to be in for a tricky ride because I couldn't think of anything to compare it to. I'm obviously trying to do something different that is not really a traditional ghost story. It's a metaphysical realm, but I still wanted it to feel grounded.

Q: You depart from the Japanese novel by Taichi Yamada the film is based on, adding the romantic storyline. What lead you in that direction?

HAIGH: I loved the central idea in the novel about the parents but wanted to add this layer of this relationship and how that relates to the grief of losing his parents, wrapped up in the trauma, as he sees it, of growing up an outsider, growing up gay. I felt they meshed in a really interesting way. Those kind of traumas and pains and struggles can be linked. And I always wanted to tell a story about the pain that we carry around with us, and how easily it can come to the surface again.

Q: That was also the case in your "45 Years," where a longtime married couple is rocked when the husband's long-ago lover is found in a melting glacier. Both films have a frozen-in-time element.

HAIGH: I think all of my films are concerned with time. "Weekend" is set over 48 hours. "45 Years" is set over a week, yet it seems to go back in time. Time feels really unstable to me. You can be transported back 40 years just by hearing a song. And you can feel what it felt like when you were 12, you can literally feel it in your whole body. We're constantly haunted. The love that you feel for people that have been lost is as intense years and years later. It's exactly the same intensity of feeling. Nothing else is like that, that intensity.

Q: There's a scene when Adam tells Henry about his parents' death but says it was a long time ago. Henry replies, "I don't think that matters."

HAIGH: That to me is such a key line. I think for lots of things, we're convinced that we've gotten over them. We're told, "Time heals all wounds." But it doesn't. You feel it in your body, physically. You remember the pain you used to feel. We pretend we're OK but, of course, most of the time we're not. And we're still children. I'm 50 now and sometimes I feel like, "My God, I'm 10." How is that even possible? You're supposed to become an adult. When does this happen that I become an adult?

Q: One of the movie's most lovely moments is when Adam puts on his childhood pajamas.

HAIGH: Exactly. It's so absurd, that moment. We all still want our Christmases to be like we remember even if those Christmases were miserable at the time. We kind of have this strange nostalgic sense of what childhood should have been. I think for a lot of queer kids, there's a sense of grief that they feel that their childhood wasn't the childhood that they wished they could have had. There's a sort of mourning that queer people can go through wishing desperately for a thing that didn't exist.

Q: Did you feel that way?

HAIGH: Absolutely. I felt like an outsider for a very long time as a kid. It took me a long, long, long time to come to terms with my sexuality. I didn't come out until my mid- to late-20s. It took me a long time. And my childhood had some complications. I always felt on edge. And I think that's how a lot of people feel, whether you're gay or not. Lots of kids feel slightly estranged from their family.

Q: The way you introduce Jamie Bell's character — he seems almost like a potential lover — seems to immediately draw a connection between his relationship with Adam and Adam's relationship with Henry.

HAIGH: I feel really strongly that parental love is how you understand love in general. So it's bound to feed into romantic love. I always found that the feeling of romantic love is so similar to the feeling of love you have for your family. There's a difference, but they're so connected, which is is why it's so hard to forge relationships unless you felt huge amounts of love and protection when you're younger.

Q: I wouldn't want to give away the film's gorgeous ending, but I have to ask what pushed you to conclude it in such a cosmic way?

HAIGH: I do want it to have some kind of cosmic feeling to it. Someone said to me, "Stars can be dead for millions of years but you still see their light." A little bit cheesy, I guess, but, still, it's sort of true. Also as a kid, I never thought growing up in the '80s that I would be able to be gay and have a relationship and be in love. I thought it was an impossibility. When I was making the film, I was like: You know what? I'm going to make the sense of love massive. I want to go into the stars.'

[doyouremem8erme]

i put together some transcripts of the pages with a lot of text! theyre probably not perfect bc i used image to text for some of them and transcribed the others by hand

Foreword

"Amphibia changed my life" -- BRENDA SONG, VOICE OF ANNE

When I first saw a sketch of Anne Boonchuy, with one shoe on and leaves in her hair, I felt an immediate kinship and connection with her. I felt like I knew her right away. I could see her quirky. dry sense of humor. I could see how brave she was. even if she didn't know it herself yet. There was so much detail and story in this one image. I was blown away. I wanted to know more about Anne, and I most definitely wanted to meet the person who created her. At that point, I hadn't done a lot of voice-over work, so I was a bit nervous for my audition. But the moment that I stepped into that booth and met Matt Braly for the first time. I immediately understood why this show was so special. It's because Matt Braly is so special. Not only is he an incredible artist, but his warmth and kindness mixed with his witty sense of humor is the true heart of Amphibia. He built a world where being different is not just okay. it's celebrated. After my audition, I remember thinking that even if didn't get the part. I'm so happy that Anne and Amphibia existed in this world. Thank goodness that wasn't the case and I had the privilege of voicing Anne for three glorious seasons. I remember the first time Matt invited me over to the studio to see some finished episodes. Up until then. I had just been recording from scripts and hadn't seen any completed art. I cannot explain how floored I was after I watched the opening credits. It was so beautiful. The landscapes, the characters, the attention to detail-- I literally wanted to take a screen shot, print it out, frame it, and put it over my mantle. I had never seen a show look like this. You could feel and see how much love and care was put into every detail. Every frame was a true work of art. It made me look at animation through completely different eyes. The world that Matt and the entire Amphibia crew worked so tirelessly to bring to life is truly so unique, spectacular, and weird in the very best ways. Amphibia changed my life and will always have a special place in my heart. I will be forever grateful to be a part of this family. Thanks for letting this little girl live out her anime dream, Matt.

Sasha Waybright

When Anne was zapped to Amphibia, she wasn't alone - her two schoolmates were also transported. The first that we meet on the show is Sasha Waybright (Anna Akana), who quickly aligns herself with the toads and even has a sidekick in one-eyed toad warrior Grime (Troy Baker). Sasha, Braly admits, is "one of my favorite characters." Writing Sasha, the Amphibia team wanted to create the perfect foil, someone Anne could really stand up to after living under their thumb her whole life. Slotting into the show's themes of change and maturation, the character was essential because then the team could show how much Anne had changed by being away from Sasha all those months. Spending time with the Plantars in Wartwood helped Anne to reevaluate what was important to her, leading to the epic and tragic conflict between the two girls in the season one finale. "Reunion." "You can tell that Sasha's never been told no before by Anne. It's just never happened. And you can feel the tectonic plates of this relationship shifting because of that confidence that Anne now has," Braly said. Amphibia wasn't content to leave Sasha as a one-note antagonist, however. Throughout the series. the writers were looking to unravel and investigate Sasha's relationship to control -- her need to control her friends, her situation, how she is perceived, and how she perceives. A brief flashback in season one shows Sasha standing up to some bullies on Anne's behalf which is ironic because Sasha is, of course, herself a bully. But from Sasha's point of view, she was providing a service and deserved to be respected and followed because of that service. This makes her an ideal partner for the oppressive toads, who provide protection and then demand tribute in return. In the same way that Sprig is partnered with Anne, toad leader Grime is partnered with Sasha, suggesting that Grime represents who she is on the inside. The cohort she chooses is a hyper version of herself, who is also more outwardly brutish. From a character design point of view, unlike Anne -- who remains in a grimier version of her Catholic school outfit for the entirety of season one -- Sasha fully changes herself to fit in with her new surroundings. This was part of both of their characters' arcs, with the Amphibia team wanting Anne -- who begins the show a lazy, selfish shoplifter -- to get better and for Sasha to get worse. Instead of reinventing herself in a positive way, Sasha leans into her negative qualities because they initially help her to get ahead in this horrifying environment. The events of "Reunion" are the catalyst for Sasha's own transformation throughout the show. And after her schemes fall through yet again in season two, she comes to the realization that the control she craves is only pushing people away. It takes time to get there. but she ultimately leaves Amphibia a hero through and through.

ok marcy's is missing a lot and is pretty blurry but i'll do my best to transcribe it by hand :] stuff in brackets is just my best guess for whats cut off.

Marcy Wu

The third human to be transported to the magical, horrible land of Amphibia was Marcy Wu (Haley Tju), a character that the team hadn't quite figured out--at least, initially. The character was conceived as more cunning and mischievous in the beginning. A bit of a pulling-the-strings-behind-the-scenes kind of character. That all changed when they cast Tju. "She became this incredibly lovable, nerdy goofball who was living out her escapist fantasy," Braly said. "We were like, 'That's great. Let's pivot to that,' because it was so compelling." Visually, the team wanted to capture the idea that she's having the time of her life. Her outfit was specifically inspired by Aragorn from Lord of the Rings. She also has a bandolier with potions and [mushrooms] and a belt-buckle in the shape of an "M." She became [the embodiment] of wish fulfillment. There's also that green hairclip, [a] remnant of the human world and a detail that was important [to the] Amphibia team. The clip had a disarmingly girlish quality, one [?] but also serves as camoflauge--you don't suspect her of [wrong?]-doing because of how she looks. [The influence?] of the fantasy genre is incredibly [clear?]. Braly said, "She's got little anime keychains and a [?] should feel like a classmate you had in school [?] in that way. I feel like we all knew someone [?] a little overexcited about their passions." Of [?] her to something much more unexpected [?] [behind?] you and was really into manga [?] [design?] work obscures Marcy's role as the [?]. Spoilers: it was Marcy who got the girls [?] [even?] after getting them trapped, didn't tell [them who?] did it. She also planned to further [continue?] their world-hopping adventures [?] fear of losing her friends to a big [change?] [?] [offered] a job out of state back home.) [?] more harm than Sasha, the [?] dichotomy is dramatic [?] she is this sweet, lovable [?] she actually hurt [?] [?] sell the big twist. [?] already been [?] suspicion by Sprig [?] [seems] fun and [?] in that [?]

ok that got ROUGH at the end because stuff is cut off i dont know why i even bothered. but here's her second page too:

Braly credits writer Adam Colás and storyboard artist Anna O'Brian, who, along with Tju, gave birth to Marcy. "The alchemy of them getting together really brought her to life," Braly said. Marcy's story in Amphibia becomes one of not running away from the big changes coming in her life. Her decisions, while well-intentioned, lead her down a rabbit hole of horror as she becomes the host body for an evil supercomputer, birthing the twisted villain Darcy (also Tju). But in standing up to this entity in the climax of "All In," she demonstrates her growth and refuses to lose herself to fantasy again. Ironically, Marcy becomes an author at the end of the show, creating entire worlds for others to immerse themselves in.

The Amphibia that Never Was

Before Amphibia, there was Amphibiland. When work on Gravity Falls's second (and ultimately final) season was winding down, writer and storyboard artist Matt Braly reached something of an impasse. He needed another show to roll onto, but, according to Braly, "there wasn't really anything." While working late one night with Gravity Falls creator Alex Hirsch, Hirsch put a bug in Braly's ear: he should pitch his own show. "It's amazing because sometimes in life, until someone has vocalized it, it seems impossible. But the second he said, 'why don't you try?', it suddenly seemed very doable," Braly remembered. "Why shouldn't I at least try?" Braly got to thinking. His first idea was for a Power Rangers spoof, but the week he pitched it, Disney released a trailer for Big Hero 6. His second idea was a Star Trek-ish concept called Internship, about (you guessed it) interns on a U.S.S. Interprise-type ship. It also didn't go anywhere. At Disney, the appetite, it seemed, had cooled for sci-fi. Instead, Braly pivoted to fantasy. "I really wanted to make a story about a character who was completely out of place from where they were. Because, to me, my favorite shows were stories where characters really grew and changed." The idea that was deemed the stickiest was about a teenage girl trapped in "a medieval, crunchy, gross frog world." The show would be about a Lindsey Lohan in Mean Girls-style who could then be dropped in a horrible fantasy landscape. Hirsch remembered that Braly loved working on Gravity Falls episodes that featured spoiled brat Pacifica. "He really liked writing sassy mean girls and he had an extraordinary knack for it." But why frogs? Because people think frogs are gross, for one. An unappealing fantasy world would be made even more unappealing if it was populated exclusively by giant, talking frogs. And then there's the metaphoric value of frogs -- for a show about change. you couldn't ask for a better example than a creature that goes through big transformations throughout its life cycle. While the show ended up colorful and quite chipper, the reference points for Amphibiland, at least initially. were much darker and more unsettling. Specifically, the original version of the show was inspired by the "sweaty" fantasy movies of the 1970's and 1980's -- things like Jim Henson and Frank Oz's The Dark Crystal, Henson's Labyrinth, and Arthur Rankin, Jr. and Jules Bass's adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit. Instead of the lush colors of the eventual show, everything in this initial version was muted and muddy. The world was more dangerous. Anne, referred to as a "beast" in the pilot episode, lived in a cave surrounded by animal bones (that she presumably caught and ate). This was a version that was scary and spiky and thorny. Development (and later Season 2) art director, Jacob Streilein, worked on creating backgrounds that felt like they could be practical sets. The original title, Amphibiland, had a logo with wood grain and a burning torch -- something that gave off the vibe of an epic classic fantasy.

Received an almost final printing of The Art of Amphibia and am sitting here vibrating with excitement just look at this stuff ---- Matt Braly. 🐸💙💎

The Art of Amphibia coming March, 25 2025

[le-souriant]

#MusicMonday Review - April 2023

#MusicMonday is the hashtag I've been using for quite a while to share music recommendations from up-and-coming artists. Always fresh, and always different, trying to look for trends before they become one. You can check March's review for more music.

Welcome to our moody edition, where this month's music may transport you to a different state, temper, place, or era, all with a word from the artists themselves. 🎧

asia – Twenty twenty

I never thought that you would want to fall for me til you did

Now I don't know where you are Doesn't matter now So I don't know where I am

Sometimes you only need a guitar, and inspiration, to set a mood like no other, like this Sad Indie track, coming from Brussels, Belgium:

"I wrote it during Covid so it was largely inspired by the feeling of being stranded hahaha"

The Lonely Together – City Lights

Some men will never find love They're chasing all the wrong kind of city girls And it's true that there are many But for me, there was only ever one

I've never been so worried and I've never felt so scared in the knowledge that I cannot be there

From Edinburgh, Scotland, another dreamy mood piece, where the city air feels warm, floodlit by the sun, hanging over the absence of that special someone:

"I wrote it while apart from someone I cared about… the feeling of distance - different cities/views/surroundings and the emotions that stirred up. It’s a real love song."

Delta – En Mi Lugar

Siete copas tras la barra son algunas de las farras Que hace tiempo no me pego Solo puedo dar las gracias peinarme las cuatro canas Por lo bien que lo hemos hecho

En mi lugar, mirar atrás Sentir que todo pasa y nada está de más Un chaval, que no da más Al fin entiende que todo llega al final

Moving now to Barcelona, this Spanish Pop track offers a nostalgic mood in which time often puts us in our place:

"Well that’s an easy one! Since En mi Lugar is probably the first song with a common ground to share between all our band mates. A bittersweet feeling we all share when we take a look back into our lives only to realize how wonderful our past experiences have been, and at the same time facing the truth of knowing that most of those experiences are never to be repeated again."

Storm the Palace – Some of the Beasts and Birds We Saw

You and I found this In a moment, a pause for thought A faulty rhyme of two straight lines One pushes back, the other forth

One day you will grow into yourself And then you will blossom for all to see And no one will take your for any less Than you were meant to be

We go back to Edinburgh for a taste of Pagan Pop, complete with its own medieval mood that can make a new adventure from your daily dog walk:

"It started with a bit of graffiti on the river path near my house, which read "some of the beasts and birds we saw". WillaDavie took this and turned it into lyrics, which I then turned into the song.

I think the song is about the time she and I spent together throughout lockdown, going for walks, drinking in graveyards, talking about life and art and all things in between."

Pan Arcadia – Deja Vu

We’ve been left to instinct Left an imprint on my brain Often it's been different But it didn’t feel that way yesterday

I remember on the lawn How you used to sing along And I know you remember too You say you still get satisfaction From that fast and easy action I know I still get it too

For our last mood of the month, let's go to Williamsburg, Brooklyn for an Indie Rock track about that good ‘ole deja vu that gets us through the night in the city:

"The song was inspired by being in quarantine and thinking about summer days in New York City."

Listen to them and much more on the complete Playlist:

[leatherbookmark]

one thing i really love about atz is that

the songs have different soundscapes in each series.

they started with treasure, with its title tracks almost cinematic in how they can transport you to a particular setting, immediately set off a Brain Music Video in your head, and b-sides that do the same but to a lesser, more tame extent -- this series is all about painting scenarios and emotions in your head, making you feel like a character about to embark on a great adventure!

then we've got fever, and just as the mvs change from almost fantasy-like locations to scenery closer to the modern life, so does the music -- the tracks are more polished and defined in their concepts, and the sound overall is less detailed and more modern.

and now the world is more electric, almost... industrial, sort of? the sound, especially the vocal processing, has this kind of... dark and busy dystopic city vibe, with a constant anxious undercurrent that doesn't let you fully relax into a song. during the fever era we had bright, sunny and hopeful songs like celebrate, eternal sunshine, good lil boy, and these just... don't fit at all into the world's climate.

idk if it's because of the number of tracks (on average i think atz have more tracks per album than deukae) or something else, but deukae's tracklists are -- or were? i don't know how it's going to be now -- fairly predictable, with one title track, one obligatory ballad, and two b-sides experimenting with genres. that sort of made the album contents interchangeable, especially the ballads, because recently i just lost patience and started skipping them lol. it's not that they don't have albums approaching a specific sound color -- road to utopia or summer holiday come to mind here -- but i kind of wish it was a more common occurrence. it probably won't be! photoshoot-wise, they set a couple of different concepts and match them song-photoshoot, so their style is "diversity within one album", but. yknow. (i'm still mourning a whole series called apocalypse only having darker, rockier songs in the very last album :'))

[rottenbrainstuff]

I’m working through the second half of Jojo part 5.

I’m actually kind of liking the characters now, more than I thought I would. Funnily enough, the character I’m the least interested in is probably Giorno himself. He just doesn’t really seem to have much personality. And he’s got an interesting backstory that just… doesn’t have to do with anything. It doesn’t really directly inform his choices in the same way the other characters’ pasts continue to affect them. Trish and Giorno are both kind of dealing with similar fallout from having a shitty and dangerous dad that abandoned them, but this parallel doesn’t seem to really ever matter, at least not yet. Trish gets to express her complicated feelings about her father and have an arc about discovering things about herself that is interesting. Narancia is the one who gets a dramatic scene realizing how he and Trish are dealing with similar trauma. Does it even matter who Giorno’s dad is? It’s an interesting way to stick him in the narrative and make him a Jojo, but it seems like that’s the only way it’s relevant at all. Seems like a missed opportunity.

Of course it’s a great big meme how it’s hard to understand exactly how King Crimson works. All these memes about how you are galaxy brained if you can figure it out. There’s nothing to figure out. It’s not that it’s so complicated and smart you need to be a genius to understand it, it’s that it’s vague and doesn’t make sense, just like how nothing else in this part makes sense if you get down to the details. Just like Giorno wanting to run the drug-selling-organization because he doesn’t want it to be selling drugs, just like Bruno deciding it’s a great idea to go along with this plan after having one conversation with a total stranger, just like the amount of iron that Metallica takes out of a human body vs how much iron is actually in a human body, plus the idea that someone wouldn’t just instantly die if their blood couldn’t transport oxygen anymore, etc etc etc etc etc.

This is the doesn’t-make-sense show (and that’s ok) based on the I-just-write-whatever-I-think-sounds-cool comic (and that’s ok!!!! That’s why we like it!!) and King Crimson does time stuff and that’s really as much as anyone needs to understand it. I’m surprised anyone talks about how confusing King Crimson is when Gold Experience is clearly the most confusing. Seems like GE can basically do anything depending on what the situation calls for, as long as Araki can figure out a way to explain it.

I was trying to think about why I feel like part 5 is a bit different from the other parts and why I feel like it’s missing something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on, and I think I’ve realized why - it’s the first part without a loveable himbo. The Jojo himbos are always my favs so maybe that’s why it took me a while to get into part five lol.

So anyways. It’s going. Doppio is finally doing stuff and had his fight with Risotto which is probably my favourite thing so far. I’m really enjoying the second opening, that song is a banger, actually almost every single Jojo opening is super super cool and that’s one of the things I love about this show. Polnaref is going to show up very soon and I’m excited.

[dameronology]

wait on {din djarin x reader}

summary: boba fett is a good therapist, and din djarin is spectacular at being nosey. the result? a much needed conversation. perhaps there’s a silver lining. {kinda based on this song}

warnings: angst, language, swearing, s2 spoilers

this one hurts a lil bit but i promise the ending is happy. enjoy!!

-jazz

The air between you was thick, not unlike the beskar that the Mandalorian was wearing. 

It was funny, really, because you’d never minded the armour all that much before. Your ability to see straight through it and see Din Djarin for what he really was had been what made him fall in love with you, and you with him. Now, it felt like a barrier between you. Inches of thick metal and fabric, shielding him from the world around him. From you. The one person he usually held closest to his heart; the one person he’d let see his face for the first time in years. The man was hardly a conversationalist at the best of times but he’d opened up to you. Shared his world with you and intertwined it with yours. Built something with you that you'd both protect with your lives. 

Now, he was straying away. Forever attached by an invisible string, but with galaxies and galaxies between you. Even though he was mere inches from you, sat two seats over, there was a chilly air; if your relationship was a warm, welcoming house, the atmosphere he’d plunged you both into was the cold winter’s night on the other side of the glass. You wanted to go back, to drag him inside and slam and bolt the door behind you. Instead, you were forced to watch through the windows, knowing what was there but never quite truly getting close enough to let it envelope you. 

You couldn’t hold it against him. The last few weeks had been rough on you both, and it only come to a head today. Grogu had been taken by the Imps and the Crest had been blown up before your very eyes. It was one of those times that truly and wholly showed the difference between you and Din: you sought him out and he pulled away. You’d learnt a long time ago not to follow him. You wanted to. Fuck, you wanted to, but you’d learnt the hard way that it was a bad idea. 

Despite the icy silence and ache for your kidnapped toad son, you were still grateful for the fact Boba Fett had offered his ship as transport and shelter. You weren’t entirely sure what his deal was, but Din seemed to trust him, and so by extension, you did too. Things were a little cramped in the hull of the ship, but there was a spare sleeping quarters for you and the Mandalorian to squish into, assuming he’d let you. You didn’t want to ask him, because you were scared of the answer. 

Instead, you found yourself sat out on the dusty plains of...wherever the hell you were. Boba had parked the ship up overnight so that you could rest; it seemed to be some kind of desert planet. Not too different to Nevarro or Tatooine, but perhaps a little colder. The sky had long faded to black, casting a darkness over the sandy plains ahead of you. The chilly air was a welcome contrast against the stuffiness of the bedroom - it wasn’t even hot in there, just filled with some kind of inexplicable tension. And not the sexy kind; the regular, all-consuming type. You could feel it slowly etching into your frontal lobe, sinking in its claws and giving you a stress head-ache. Letting out a few deep breaths, you let the gusts of cold wind blow over your bare arms. 

‘A little cold out here, isn’t it?’

The voice was gravelly and unfamiliar, but one that you knew belonged to Boba Fett. 

‘Yeah, maybe.’ You didn’t turn around to look, instead letting your eyes stay focused on the distance. There was nothing ahead. Just darkness and sand. ‘Fresh air is nice, though.’

‘Or maybe the air inside is bad.’ He countered. Boba took a seat on the rock beside you, jokingly whacking his knee against yours. ‘What’s on your mind?’

‘Just...what happened today, I suppose.’ You replied. ‘We lost the kid, and our ship.’

‘You’re handling it better than your Mandalorian.’ He replied. 

‘I don’t think he’s my Mandalorian.’ You snorted. ‘He’s just...he doesn’t normally deal with so much at once. I think he just needs time to process it all, you know?’

‘Perhaps.’ Boba said. ‘And do you always make excuses for him?’

‘I beg your sweet pardon?’ You turned to look at him. 

‘Forgive me if I’m overstepping, but I’ve always been an observant man.’ He began. ‘I saw how you immediately went to him, to check on him, and how you fought beside him,  yet he’s barely even looked at you.’

‘Ouch.’ You muttered. ‘You might be observant you but certainly do not tread lightly.’

‘My apologies.’ He curtly nodded. 

‘It’s not always been like this.’ Your words felt forced. You were making excuses. ‘And it won’t always be.’

‘You know him better than anyone, or so I assume.’ Boba reminded you. ‘But don’t be afraid to remind him what he has, despite what he’s lost.’

He was right. Din could be distant, and he could be fucking ignorant without even trying, but you hadn’t strayed from his side once. Not for a second. It could be frustrating to deal, with but you loved him with your whole being, in a soul-consuming sorta way, and you knew he was capable of coming around. Your mother had always preached songs of love being patient and kind but as you saw it, it was frustrating, and at times the most inconvenient thing in the world. You must have had the patience of a saint to deal with him. He was just lucky he made it worth it (and that underneath all the armour, he wasn’t too bad to look at. It certainly helped his case). 

You let out a sad laugh. ‘I couldn’t. Di - Mando already struggles to express his feelings and I’d only make it worst if I said he wasn’t doing it well enough.’

‘You know your worth.’ Boba said. ‘Only you can decide if he appreciates it enough.’

‘He does.’ You quickly replied. ‘I know he does.’ 

He gave you a doubtful look, one that said I think you’re bullshitting, but I won’t disagree. He was simply sharing his observations, even if they were a little much. But the man hadn’t had any proper social interaction for a long time, so you could hardly blame him - and he had a sort of wise air to him, like he’d been round the block a couple times. He certainly seemed like the sort of person you should listen to.

‘I’ll leave you with this: the life of a Mandalorian is complicated.’ He dusted off his knees, before standing up. ‘You should make sure it’s worth it before you fully commit.’

‘I-’ you tried to speak, but you were cut off by the sound of a twig snapping under someone’s boot. Why the fuck were there twigs in the desert? More to the point, why was that your immediate thought? 

You both sharply turned around, coming face-to-face with a Mandalorian. Not a Mandalorian, but the Mandalorian. The one you’d just been talking about. The one whose heart would have been broken into a million tiny pieces if he’d even a word of what you just said. And, from the way his helmet tilted ever so slightly to the left, you figured he’d heard more than enough. Fuck. 

'Don’t let me stop you.’ His modulated voice wavered ever so slightly. ‘I’ll see you inside.’

He turned on his heel, heavy steps taking him back towards the Slave I. To anyone else, his body language hadn’t changed, but you could read him like a book. A complicated book, and one that was missing more than half its pages and was in a dozen different fucking languages, but one you’d read a thousand times. Understanding Din Djarin was hard, and you’d only just begun -  barely touched the surface in fact - but it was more than anyone else could say. 

‘Wait!’ You leapt up, almost comically falling over as you rushed after him. 

Sensing that his presence was probably not welcome, Boba returned to his seat on the rock, silently hoping that Fennec Shand was either a) asleep, or b) had enough common sense to stay the fuck out of the way of whatever was about to go down. 

‘I swear to maker if you shut that door -’ you were cut off by...the door shutting in your face. Djarin: 1. You: 0.

You let out a small groan, slamming your fist against it. 

‘Okay, maybe I deserved that.’ You quietly muttered. ‘But will you please listen to me?’

Silence. 

‘Fine.’ You splayed your fingers out against the metal. ‘Ice me out, Din Djarin. I’m more than used to it by now.’

There was a gruff hmm from the other side of the door. Had he really just taken offence to that?

‘It’s funny, really.’ You continued. ‘Because the part of that conversation you didn’t hear was me defending you. Like I always fucking do, because I know that despite everything, you’re a human being and you love me.’

There was a small thud, as though Din had placed his hand in a similar position to yours.

‘But Boba has a point.’ Your voice fell to a whisper. ‘I keep giving and I get nothing back. Instead of letting me in, you just shut me out and I know you’re upset at what he said but for the love of everything holy in this shitty world, do not prove him right.’

It was a risky ultimatum, and not one you’d seen coming. Your chest had tightened as soon as the words left your mouth, because you knew that if Din stayed silent, that was it. You’d have to let him go; to accept that you would never get back what you putting in. Before, you were able to convince yourself that you were okay with that but maybe, just maybe you weren’t. Waiting around for something that had no guarantee of happening was like beating a dead horse that had no guarantee of coming back to life. The only thing that was promised was emotional exhaustion and then eventual death. You would have liked to have found something between those two waypoints - whether Din Djarin could be the one to give it to you? You didn’t know. 

After a moment of silence, the door finally opened, and you came face to face with him. Like actually face to face with him; no helmet, no armour. Just a loose tunic and tired brown eyes, matched with lazily-shaven facial hair and knitted brows. That was Din. Your Din. 

‘Can I just...can I just talk for a moment?’ He asked. ‘I have something to say and I want to get it right.’

‘Of course.’ You nodded. 

‘I’m not hurt by what you said.’ He stated. ‘I know I don’t show you enough love and it hurts that I don’t know how, but I am trying. I promise you that much.’

You gave him a tearful smile. ‘Yeah, I know.’

‘I just wish that you could say it to me and not to him.’ He murmured. ‘I don’t want you to hold back on anything, ever. You can always come to me. Even if it’s about me.’

‘I get that.’ Your eyes fell to the floor. ‘It’s just that I know you’re trying your best and I’m scared you’ll think that your best isn’t enough.’ 

‘It’s not.’ Din’s words took you by surprise. ‘It’s not enough, but one day, I hope it will be.’

‘I don’t know what to say, because if I deny it-’

‘- you don’t have to say anything.’ He cut you off. ‘I want to give you the world. And I will, if you’ll be patient with me.’

You took every word as gospel as he said it. The Mandalorian was a lot of things, but a liar wasn’t one of them. And to his credit, every promise he’d made to you before, he’d delivered on. You didn’t doubt for a second that this one would be the same. It wasn’t even naivety or wishful thinking. 

‘I mean, I’ve come this far.’ You tried to crack a joke. You finally looked up from the floor, his brown eyes meeting yours. 

‘I love you.’ He took your hands in his, words firm. ‘That’s all I can give you right now. I’m sorry.’

‘Din.’ The words barely come out as a whisper. ‘Never apologise. Please never apologise. I just...it’s nice to hear it, you know? A little more often than every time you almost die.’

‘Are the words enough on their own?’

‘Yes.’ You squeezed his hands. ‘Because I know you mean them.’

Din wrapped his arms you, pulling you tightly against his chest. It was warm and soft, miles away from the cold armour that so often greeted you. He held you tightly and with a new kind of might you were previously yet to experience, clinging onto you as though it were the last time. It wasn’t - it was far from the last time. Rather, it was the first time. The first time that he’d spoken of a future with you, or fully promised himself to you. You knew you would get there one day. You’d just needed him to say it himself before you could believe it. 

Din Djarin was giving you tiny little pieces on himself each day, and one day, you would have all of him. 

tags: @meshlababy @bo-kryze @poestardust @aqueencomplexx @princessxkenobi @cosmic-rich @captn-andor @buttercup--bee​ @maharani-radha​ @kat-r-in​