kubb-is-a-swedish-lawn-game

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clara!! (again)

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Top 3 ways to pronounce "worms":

woims (old-timey New York gangster)

wurrums (Scottish)

weuhrms (bad French accent like the narrator from spongebob)

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mythbusters is really good at being extremely timeless but occasionally kari wears something that violently reminds me that this show was filmed in the 2000’s.

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I think the height of quarantine craziness online was when a couple of my friends and I would do beatles roleplay improv in the middle of pony.town’s little user hub and this genuinely would piss people off so much. Like people genuinely thought we were the scum of the earth for showing up as beatles ponies and staying immovably in character to their cartoon counterparts. Will never forget this.

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Benson Boone sounds like the name of a guy in a folk song who gets gunned down for adultery and thrown in a river

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dash simulator

person I've never met: just so everyone knows [person I follow] has raped five hundred babies here are testimonials from the parents

person I've never met: i can't believe donald trump made a new law that says every woman has to beg for forgiveness for the sin of being born with an unholy body every time she is graced by the presence of a man. and also he's putting every immigrant on a boat and sailing it into the bermuda triangle

different person I follow: I keep hearing whispering next to my window at night lol

mutual: I think I'm going to kill myself

ad: DON'T you want to be SLURPING YOUR SLOP through our MAGNIFYING GLASS STRAW? click HERE to receive A MESSAGE FROM GOD

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Hey gang for those of you waiting for my return just letting you know that running the muppet joker account has put a very real strain on my real life marriage and I have decided to step away from the blog for the foreseeable future.

I have been talking to her and everone else in my personal life "in character" as the muppet joker so that my blog would be as true to life as possible. I have been wearing Joker makeup around the house, which at first she found funny, but now she can't even look at me. I started compulsively fantasizing about the muppets and it's ruining our sex life. I accidentally called her Kermit in the bedroom and she made me sleep on the couch for a week.

Our son turned one year old this year on July 5th, on the day of Dashcon 2. My wife begged and pleaded with me to stay home and celebrate his birthday, but I was stupid and selfish and had become completely taken over by the muppet joker persona at that point. I went. I returned home to an ultimatum. Its my family, or it's the muppet joker. I chose my family.

Sorry tumblr. I have failed you. I have failed my wife. I have failed my son. I have to go now, to be with them, and to watch my child grow up.

Goodbye, Homosapiens

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“this meeting could’ve been a email” except its “this esoteric children’s punishment could’ve been a normal conversation with them”

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designs ^_^

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on survival

-// @aridante // @orivu // @buzzkillgirls // ? // ? // richard siken// @cemeterything // moomin, tove jansson// @disenchanted-killjoy // isn't that enough, shawn mendes// @ prettytheyswag on twitter// @ coletyumuch on twitter// ? // ? // bird by bird, anne lamott// undertale// @strawberrycircuits

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reaching a next level of niche blorbo where im not even obsessed with any fandom character or any OCs, im obsessed with my own sims from my sims save. i keep wanting to make memes about them as if anyone knows who they are. im getting attached to recurring townie sims. im in hell.

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my notes

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I've reached the point in my life where every day there's like a solid hour where all I can think about is how I wanna kill my dad really badly with knives and hammers

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if I could find someone to start a family with

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"sound of the summer is this song" WRONG. its cicadas

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Villains base, ep. 5

Still waiting for that tnt canon on top of theirs lighthouse