#i drew this months ago then forgot about it but i still feel so strongly about this

[s-aint-elmo]

clankie long-distance handholding thank you for my life

(ID in alt text)

[babineni]

Okay so literal months ago I wrote some Aloth x Watcher first steamy night together stuff, then I completely forgot about it, then I came across it a few days ago so I guess y’all can look at it, if you want.

Happy Valentine’s Day, I guess

Below the cut, bc a) explicit content b) almost 3k words, sooo yeah

Gaura woke up to the bed shifting slightly under her. She glimpsed movement as she rubbed her eyes and once she made out the silhouette of the man leaving her side, her drowsiness dissipated in an instant.

'Where are you going?' The Watcher asked as she sat up.

Aloth turned around to her voice, and a faint, adoring smile appeared on his face. He loosely held on to a worn book. The last thing Gaura remembered before falling asleep was the wizard reading aloud from that book at her request. It was... about corrosives... she thought. It didn't take her long to drift off.

'You fell asleep,' Aloth said. 'I thought that was my cue to leave.'

'It's not. Unless you want it to be,' Gaura moved to the edge of the bed and reached for the wizard's free hand.

It has only been a few days since she gave him the kiss that changed their friendship into the bond they shared at that moment. The Watcher didn't have much in mind when she kissed Aloth that day, she merely wanted to show him how she felt and asked for the chance to show it again and again and again. But she had a lot of feelings for the wizard and she felt them strongly and deeply, and in the few days of their courtship, Gaura often found herself wondering if she felt too much, too deeply, too strongly for Aloth to feel comfortable around her. So she let him set the pace of their relationship, even if she was fully aware of his occasionally excessive caution and his indecisiveness.

Aloth sat down beside Gaura. He put his book aside so he could hold her hand with both hands.

'I would like to stay, it's true, but...'

'Then stay.'

The wizard hesitated for a moment, then let out a shaky laugh.

'I got the impression you needed rest.'

The Watcher moved closer to him and placed her chin on his shoulder. She let her eyes close as she enjoyed the smell of the ocean breeze clinging onto Aloth's hair. 'I was soothed, not tired,' she said. 'And I definitely wasn't bored.'

'I did not think you were.'

'Just making sure, you don't get the wrong idea,' Gaura pulled away and left a peck on Aloth's cheek. She then placed the book by the window beside the bed, laid back on her place and patted the space next to her.

The wizard was just about to take her offer when he looked down at himself and noted his armor. Then he looked at the Watcher and noted her loosely fitting nightgown.

'I'll be ready in a minute,' he said and started to undo the buckles on his leather suit.

Gaura knelt on the edge of the bed once more. 'Let me help,' she offered as she reached for the laces on his chest. Aloth gave her a nod, but otherwise he said nothing. But the Watcher could still see him biting his lip and his cheeks turning red from the corner of her eyes. After a few moments, all that was left to do was merely pushing the armor off the elf. Gaura slid her hands under the garment, prompting Aloth to let his arms hang by his sides. It seemed like a relaxed gesture but to her it felt anything but that. For a moment she felt his heart pounding in his chest, its speedy rhythm enticing her.

'Gaura?' The wizard's voice was breathy as he leaned closer to her. Close enough for his breath to mingle with hers. 'Was this your intention all along?' He asked as a faint, slightly sly smile formed on his lips which disappeared in a fraction of a moment.

'No,' she replied while she reached for his undershirt and fiddled with it, ready to pull it off him as soon as he asked, as soon as he showed any sign that he wanted her the same way she wanted him. 'But I'm open to it. I'm... more than open to it.'

'You... you don't think this is too soon?' Aloth's question sounded almost like a plea.

'No. And even if it was... I find it really hard to care about timing right now,' Gaura laughed and it proved to be contagious. She pressed her lips against the wizard's, and pulled his shirt upwards. Aloth helped her take it off him, quickly uttering protective spells before he reached for the back of the Watcher's head and closed the gap between them again. His touch was gentle, feather-light, but his kiss hinted at impatience and a desire that could have been just as scorching as the fire in Gaura's soul if he allowed himself to truly feel it.

The Watcher pulled away. 'My turn,' she said, as she reached for the straps of her gown. She untied them with a few simple tugs and let the gown fall on its own to her knees. Aloth's tender gaze wandered along her body, tracing the cracks on her skin. But eventually, it returned to the glowing center of her chest. There was something in his eyes that Gaura couldn't quite place, not even as the wizard turned his attention back to her face and looked straight into her eyes.

'May I?' He asked, his hand hovering right above the bright mark.

Gaura replied with a somewhat impatient nod. Aloth pressed his palm against her chest upon her permission. He seemed almost mesmerized by the combined sensation of her strong heartbeat and her flames gently licking his skin.

'You act as if you couldn't just conjure flames at will,' the Watcher teased as she leaned in to leave a sloppy kiss below Aloth's jaw. She made her way down on the side of his throat while she reached for his trousers. She quickly undid it and slid her hand under it. She kept her mouth pressed to the curve of the wizard's neck as she caressed his already half-hardened bulge.

'No magical fire feels like you,' Aloth answered, his voice ringing with admiration.

Gaura pulled away hesitantly and surprised. She stared at the wizard as he averted his gaze shyly, his already flushed face taking a deeper shade of red.

'Turn around,' she said breathlessly, with the corner of her lips perking up. 'Take off the rest of your clothes.'

Aloth swallowed hard. 'What's on your mind, if I may ask?' He spoke cautiously. However his movements did not reflect what his voice did. He turned around as Gaura asked, and as he dragged his pants down, he almost seemed eager for an answer. An answer that was not meant to be expressed in words.

The Watcher chuckled softly as she shuffled out of her nightgown and moved closer to the wizard, as close as she possibly could without falling off her bed. She wrapped her arms around him from behind. She pressed her chest against his back tight and she rested her chin on his shoulder, right by his ear. Aloth let out a short, quiet gasp at the contact. His body stiffened slightly, prompting Gaura to leave a gentle kiss on the curve of his neck, then another one on his earlobe.

'I just want you to relax,' she said while she inhaled the scent of his hair and she allowed her hands to explore his chest, enjoying the feeling of goosebumps forming under her touch. 'I want to soothe you the way you have soothed me just now.'

'I hope you don't take it as an offense, but-' the wizard's words turned into a shaky sigh as the Watcher's fingers reached one of his nipples and drew circular patterns around it slowly and gently. 'Soothed is... truly, the last word I'd use to describe how I feel right now.'

'Do you want me to stop then?' Gaura asked, her lips brushing against Aloth's ear.

'No!' He replied without hesitation. The Watcher couldn't help but chuckle at his haste, which prompted him to clear his throat, and make a poor attempt at regaining his composure. 'No, I...'

His trail of thought was diverted by one of Gaura's hands sliding downwards. However just before she would've reached his loins, she pulled her hand back. Aloth held his breath while she wet her palm, then a moment passed, and another, and the Watcher merely stood motionless behind him, with only her flames caressing and enveloping him with all the tenderness of her soul.

'Please, continue.'

Gaura hummed approvingly as she pressed her lips against Aloth's neck. She reached forward again, gently caressing the wizard's thigh as she did so. She wrapped one hand around his cock and began stroking it at the same pace as her mouth moved against the side of his throat, while the other kept massaging his chest, with her thumb occasionally brushing against his nipple. A few moments later she felt his touch on the back of her head, his slender fingers brushed against her scalp gingerly, prompting the Watcher to look up at him. Aloth turned his head slightly towards her but he couldn't tear his gaze from her hand pumping his shaft slowly and steadily.

'Is this tempo alright?' Gaura asked. 'I want everything to happen to your liking. We'll take it as slow or as fast as you want.' She leaned in, and left a small kiss on Aloth's parted lips, drawing a staggered sigh out of him.

'I... I wouldn't mind if you were a... a little fas-... Oh,' Aloth's request turned into a short, surprised, quiet moan as the Watcher obliged him before he got to finish the sentence.

The wizard's breath quickened as well, and Gaura could almost hear a few notes of his pleasure mingling faintly with the air he exhaled. Aloth pressed his lips against hers as tightly as he could at their angle, trying to muffle the sounds escaping him, which enticed the Watcher all the more. She had to restrain herself from rubbing him even faster, the same way Aloth had to force himself to keep kissing her. Gaura couldn't tell how long they went on until he broke the kiss and covered his mouth with his free hand instead. The wizard rested his forehead against the Watcher's as he moaned into his palm. She could've sworn she felt his eyelashes flutter against her skin, drawing a soft chuckle out of her.

'You are so lovely,' she spoke softly. 'You want us both to keep quiet?'

Aloth gave her a few somewhat staggered nods.

'Alright, Aloth,' Gaura replied. 'Lean back against me.'

The wizard hesitated for a moment, then he cautiously lifted his head and looked at Gaura. She made her best attempt at giving him a reassuring nod, but she couldn't help but bite her lip when she looked into his eyes full of adoration for her, twinkling with a hunger for release. He then let his eyes close and threw his head back against her shoulder. His neck formed a curve that the Watcher couldn't resist. She trailed it with her tongue, prompting the wizard the press down on her scalp slightly, wordlessly asking her to kiss him harder. Gaura picked up the pace of her strokes, making Aloth squirm under her touch, making him fill her ear with more and more of his muffled moans. The Watcher closed her eyes, and allowed herself to be lost in the anticipation for Aloth coming undone at her hand.

'Gaura?' She heard her name. 'Wait... wait. Stop!' The wizard grabbed her wrist and straightened up. He gently peeled her hands off him and stepped away with an apologetic expression on his face.

'Is something wrong?' The Watcher asked. 'Did I...?' A small kernel of anxiety formed in her: she wondered if she ended up crossing an unknown line. If she did indeed felt too much, too strongly and too deeply.

Aloth raised his hands as he sat down beside her. 'No, you did nothing wrong,' he hastily said. 'And by that I mean... that felt truly incredible,' he took her hands in his with a smile. 'It's just... the magic that protected me from your hair was wearing off.' The wizard let out a frustrated sigh.

It took Gaura a moment to process his words. 'Oh.'

'Forgive me, I'll just need a moment...'

'No, no, don't apologize,' she lifted his hands to her lips. 'I can spare a few moments in exchange for more fun afterwards.'

Aloth let out a relieved chuckle as a response. 'Thank you,' he cast his spell, then he let go of her hands and cupped the Watcher's face instead. 'I... I liked the way you held me,' he left a soft kiss on her lips. Then another. And another, as he laid down and pulled Gaura with him. 'You said you wanted everything to happen the way I liked.'

'I meant that,' the Watcher said as she moved to straddle the wizard.

A moment was spent in silence. Aloth watched Gaura intently as one of hands moved slowly to the back of her head and allowed her flames to dance along his fingers.

'Just now, it felt like... like you were touching me everywhere.' The wizard said eventually. 'I'd like you to stay close. Please.'

Gaura smiled as a response and tightened the grip of her thighs around him. She slowly rolled her hips against him, letting her slick folds coat Aloth's cock with her arousal. He stifled a groan and moved his hands to the Watcher's waist.

'You're so sweet,' she chuckled as reached back and guided the wizard's hands to cup her ass instead. She locked lips with him as she continued grinding against him. Then after a few moments, she pulled away. 'Give me one moment,' she said as reached for his cock and guided it to her heat.

The Watcher descended upon him slowly, surprised at how intensely she felt Aloth entering her. All that time she spent pleasing him turned her more sensitive than she realized. She bit her lip as she began rolling her hips again, slowly, getting used to the feeling of him inside her. Gaura set a steady, relaxed rhythm for them, one that Aloth quickly picked up on. His thrusts were light, but deep, each of them sent sparks of pleasure along the Watcher's nerves. She quickened her pace slightly, indulging her impatience for him, but she couldn't bring herself to lean back to Aloth just yet. She reached for one of his hands, and guided it to her lips. She took his thumb in her mouth and suckled on it, allowing a few of her moans to escape her throat but be trapped by his finger. She kept her gaze locked with Aloth's as she guided his hand back down, this time to the nub between her thighs. She didn't need to say anything. Aloth rubbed her clit at an erratic rhythm, and the sweet dissonance of sensations nearly overwhelmed the Watcher right then and there.

'Gaura,' Aloth whispered her name invitingly and she responded by learning back down over him and pressed her lips tightly to his.

Their muffled sounds mingled as they hastened their movements. Soon, Gaura lost all sense of her surroundings. She only felt Aloth getting lost in her, the same way she forgot about everything but him. There was no such thing as too much, or too strong, or too deep. There were only her nerves set ablaze by the wizard's touch, consuming her senses and reason. And there was only Aloth, embraced by the flames of her soul. Soon, there wasn't even that, only a feeling of overwhelming ecstasy. The Watcher couldn't help but break their kiss as one last cry of pleasure burst out of her. Aloth continued moving under her, keeping her mind in a sweet, precious haze, but even then she felt him finding a release in her as well. He wrapped his arms around Gaura in a tight embrace, and buried his face in the curve of her neck, in attempt to use her as an anchor to the reality around them. Neither of them knew how much time they spent motionlessly entangled. Soon, their awareness returned to them, and Gaura rolled off her lover.

'Don't take this the wrong way...' Gaura said panting, once she felt she was able to speak again, 'but this... this was more fun than that book about corrosives.'

Aloth let out an exhausted laugh. 'I'm... I'm inclined to feel the same,' he said as he turned to the Watcher on his side. She left a peck on his cheek, then another on his lips. 'I assume,' Aloth continued, 'you don't think this was too soon, then.'

'Not at all. Do you?'

'No,' a relieved smile appeared on the wizard's face, as if his answer reassured him just as much, if not more, as it did the Watcher. 'I am glad you asked me to stay. And... I am truly happy you kissed me the other day.'

Gaura reached for Aloth's face and ran her thumb along his soft, adoring, if tired smile. She spent a moment admiring the beauty of that smile before she spoke again. 'I am happy you let me make you happy,' she chuckled. 'There is so much in my heart for you. I might just need all the time in the world to show it all.'

'At the current pace, you mean, or...?' Aloth's furrowed his eyebrows.

'At the pace you set for us.'

The wizard's expression softened. He let out a sigh as he relaxed. 'I would like that a lot,' he shyly moved closer to Gaura. They spent a few moments while Aloth settled between the Watcher's legs and rested his head on her chest. They fell asleep shortly after, locked in a comfortable embrace, with a hint of a smile lightly pulling at their lips.

[lalikaa]

“Gravitate”

A fic I wrote for the @yamakagezine years ago and forgot to post, whoops haha. Hope you enjoy!!

~*~

It was a crisp Sunday in March; the kind of day where you’re not sure  whether you need a coat or not. The sakura trees had yet to bloom, and the  frost of February still lingered. This was one of Tadashi’s favorite times of  the year; he liked the chill before everything bloomed. 

However, Tadashi was not enjoying the cool weather at the moment, as  he was currently inside, piling bread onto a plastic tray. 

“It feels like just yesterday we were nervous about our first practice  match against Seijou, and here we are,” Tadashi began to lament. 

“...We’re in a cafe, Tadashi.” 

“You know what I mean!” Tadashi said with a huff. He was almost  tempted to say his boyfriend was being snarky, but in reality, it was just Tobio being… Tobio. 

When Tobio titled his head to the side slightly in a way that made it look like a giant question mark was floating over his head, Tadashi could not find it in himself to be exasperated. 

“Y’know, as in we’re here as third years, about ready to graduate and move on with our lives, that kinda thing.” 

The giant question mark dissipated over Tobio’s head (quite a feat, since  it was invisible to begin with), but was quickly replaced by an equally invisible exclamation mark. 

“I was never nervous about the match against Oik- Seijou,” Tobio retorted to Tadashi’s previous remark.  

“Well, you’re never nervous about anything.” 

Tobio didn’t respond to this, as they got to the cashier. Tadashi set a chocolate cornet and a red bean roll, which he had gotten for himself, and  Tobio’s melon bread and taro bun on the counter while Tobio ordered their usual drinks; a hazelnut latte for Tadashi and a matcha latte for himself.  

They scoped out their usual table by the second window to the right, and once they sat down Tobio said; “Well, some things make me nervous.” 

“Yeah? Like what?” 

“Like… passing tests, not being able to play volleyball, possibilities of  injuries… askingyouout.” The last few words were mumbled, but Tadashi  caught them anyway,  

“Awww, really? Asking me out made you nervous? But you didn’t even-” 

“I know I didn’t! Because I was nervous!” 

“There was no way you were more nervous than I was! Wait, then is  that why Shouyou-” 

“Yeah,” Tobio interjected. “Because I couldn’t do it.” 

“That-- this makes more sense now. Though, y’know, it’s not like I could’ve either.” 

Tadashi unwrapped his cornet and took a bite, now thinking back  to when their relationship had begun. If he were being honest, their  relationship definitely had an unusual start.  

Tadashi was pulled back to almost three years ago, when he’d first  joined Karasuno’s volleyball team, to when he’d first met the briskly terrifying force of nature that was Kageyama Tobio. 

~*~

Tadashi hadn’t been the only one blown away by Kageyama, but he felt like he was being affected more strongly. His heartbeat skittered whenever he was around him, something that he hadn’t experienced before. At first Tadashi was concerned that perhaps he was showing premature signs for cardiovascular disease, but when he confided this to Tsukki, he’d been met with a scoff and an eyeroll.  

“This is why feelings are stupid,” Tsukki had said. 

Whatever the hell he’d meant by that. 

After a few weeks (and a few hours on WebMD), Tadashi came to the  conclusion he wasn’t at risk of heart disease. He poured his anxiety into volleyball, and found relief in striving to be the best player he could be, drawing heavy inspiration from a certain setter.  

With every successful jump serve he made, the thought that often crossed his mind was-- 

I hope he notices. 

Months passed though, and Kageyama didn’t seem to pay any more  attention to Tadashi than he did anyone else. Tadashi tried not to take it personally.  

~*~

“He’s just so cool,” Tadashi said wistfully one day in autumn as he and Hinata sat on the steps outside the gym before practice. Tadashi was  eating a convenience store onigiri and sipping apple juice while Hinata was  bouncing a volleyball on his arms, focus sharp. 

“Yeah, he is, you should ask him out,” Hinata replied, still bouncing the  volleyball. 

Tadashi promptly spat out his juice. “I can’t do that!” 

“Why not? You’re just as cool!” 

“I’m… I’m really not. Thanks, though,” Tadashi said sheepishly. 

“Why do you think you’re not cool?” Hinata asked, catching the volleyball as he looked at Tadashi. 

Tadashi couldn’t find the words to articulate that he felt like he was floating in space when he was around Kageyama; he was a scattered  meteor, helpless to the gravitational pull of Planet Tobio.  

...That sounded kind of odd, but still.  

Tadashi sighed. There was no way he could tell Hinata all that, so instead he just said; “I don’t know.” 

“Well, I think you’re cool! You work really hard, you know? Plus you’re super nice, even though people wouldn’t think that ‘cause you hang out with Tsukishima so much.” 

Tadashi snickered. Hinata just said whatever was on his mind. 

Maybe he should, too.  

~*~

About a week after Shouyou had suggested that Yamaguchi should ask  Kageyama out, he found none other than Kageyama by his side as they were cleaning up after practice. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi had finished  folding the nets early, leaving Hinata and Kageyama to sweep the floors.  “I feel… weird,” Tobio started, which made Shouyou jump a little because Kageyama hardly ever initiated the conversation.  

“You’re always weird, Bakayama-kun,” Shouyou replied. 

When no volleyball came hurtling at his head in response, Shouyou  knew something was wrong.  

“I think I like someone as much as I like volleyball,” Kageyama  muttered. 

Shouyou stopped mid-sweep. 

Kageyama? Talking about his feelings?  

This had to be serious. 

“So… who’s your someone?”  

“No one,” Kageyama said, immediately backing out. 

“It’s gotta be someone,” Shouyou insisted, trying not to bounce in excitement. 

“Nevermind,” Kageyama grumbled.  

“Is it me?” Shouyou teased. “Kageyama, please, I’m too dedicated to volleyball to be in a relationship.” 

“It’s not you!” Kageyama snapped. 

“Ouch,” Shouyou said, pretending to be hurt.  

Then, it came to him. 

“Is it Yamaguchi?”  

“No,” Kageyama said too quickly, turning bright red. 

Aha. 

Now Shouyou just had to find the right time to ask. 

~*~

The right time came a couple months later, after the intense training camp hosted at Shiratorizawa. Hinata and Yamaguchi were eating lunch together at Hinata’s desk while Tsukshima was listening to music in his and  Yamaguchi’s classroom. Meanwhile, Yachi was tutoring Kageyama in her classroom. 

“So how was the training camp, Hinata? Tsukki said it was lame and that you were annoying.” 

“Ugh, not as annoying as he is! He put in such minimal effort, you wouldn’t believe-” 

“I think I get the idea.” Yamaguchi laughed.  

“Anyway! Are you free this Saturday afternoon after practice?” 

“Yeah, why?” 

“Awesome! You’re gonna go on a date with Kageyama at Aki Cafe in Sendai! I booked your train tickets already, you’re welcome!”

“Oh ok, thanks-- wait, WHAT.” 

Shouyou grinned as Yamaguchi proceeded to panic, giving himself a  mental pat on the back. Man, was he the most awesome friend, or what! 

On the day of the date, Tadashi had to remind himself that ‘this is fine’ approximately 19 billion times.  

But what if Kageyama didn’t actually like him? I mean, why would he?  What the hell had Hinata been thinking?! 

~*~

The train ride was as awkward as he’d expected, honestly. Kageyama  wasn’t the most social of butterflies, but as soon as Tadashi brought up  their latest practice match against Datekou, one thing led to another and  soon they were talking about various ways they could demolish Datekou’s  Iron Wall. Tadashi loved when Kageyama talked about volleyball; he was  so passionate. Tadashi envied him a little, as he felt as though his passion  for anything could never match Kageyama’s. It was just another aspect of  him that drew Tadashi in.  

Tobio was surprised at how easily he could talk to Yamaguchi. He was  used to people not wanting to talk to him, ever, so this was an unusual, but  appreciated, change of pace.  

The train bumped along as they traveled towards their destination. Tobio didn’t have the faintest clue why Hinata had bought them both train tickets and given instructions on getting to a particular cafe, and he had  definitely considered declining when Hinata brought it up… until Hinata  mentioned that his travel partner would be Yamaguchi. 

Partner was a word reserved for someone you could completely trust, and Kageyama hadn’t felt a true connection like that until he’d met Hinata.  But then, how he felt about Hinata was vastly different from how he felt  about Yamaguchi. While he wanted Hinata to spike his tosses, he wanted Yamaguchi to hold his hand... or something. It was weird.  

They got lost on their way to the cafe Hinata had suggested. “We could just go to another one,” Tobio said as they took what was likely their eighth wrong turn. 

“But Hinata went through all the trouble of finding one, so we should  go!” Yamaguchi insisted. 

Tobio shrugged. As long as he was home in time for his 8 o’clock run  he was fine. It was only 1 o’clock now, so he should be good. He tried not  to think about spending seven hours with Yamaguchi. Surely it wouldn’t be  that long…? If it was, Tobio was in trouble. He might get the urge to do  something drastically romantic, like pat Yamaguchi on the shoulder.  

Tobio snapped out of his thoughts when Yamaguchi said suddenly;  “Oh, here it is!” 

Aki Cafe was a small building, nestled between a hair salon and an  ice cream parlor. The two walked in and were greeted by the smell of  cinnamon, vanilla, coffee, and at least nine other different scents. They  studied the menu together in silence, then picked up their bread and made  their order; they each got savory crepes. 

As they waited on their food at a table by the second window to the  right, they fell into awkward silence. The waitress brought them a pitcher  of water and glasses, which was a welcome distraction. They both then  sipped their water, with Tobio doing his best not to stare too much. He’d  never realized how many freckles Yamaguchi had. They were kind of cool.  Tobio began to wonder how many there were and oh god what was wrong  with him? 

Thankfully, Yamaguchi broke the silence by bringing up a homework  assignment that he’d recently struggled on, and they came to an agreement that math was indeed the Worst, and should be banned from school. The waitress came with their crepes. They thanked her, and began to eat. 

~*~

Think of something else to say, think of something else to say oh my god why  are you so awkward this is why no one really ever wants to hang out with you,  you don’t deserve- 

“You’ve- you’ve gotten really good at jump float serves,” Kageyama said  abruptly. 

Tadashi tried not to gape at him. Kageyama, the king of serves, was  complimenting him on his serves!? No way. 

“Uh, thank you,” Tadashi said. He was still pretty bad at taking  compliments. “You’re really amazing at serves too!”  

Kageyama seemed to be just as bad at taking compliments, but not in  an awkward way like Tadashi—more in a blunt, yet endearing sort of way.  “I still have a lot to improve on,” he said seriously. 

“Me too,” Tadashi said. “Maybe you could- maybe you could help me  practice sometime?” He winced, fully expecting Kageyama to decline. “Yeah, sure,” Kageyama said. 

Tadashi suddenly felt overwhelmed. Because extra practice with  Kageyama obviously meant spending more time with him, which meant  that Tadashi’s life would become far more complicated. He wasn’t sure how  much his heart - and his nerves - could take. 

“I’d really like that!” Tadashi responded, a little too loudly. “Me, too,” Kageyama said, giving a rare smile.  

To Tadashi, it felt special, somehow. Kageyama was smiling because  of him, and only to him- it felt intimate in a way. Tadashi grinned back,  feeling his heartstrings loosen and his nerves settle down. Maybe he could  handle more time with Kageyama after all. 

~*~

After they finished their crepes, Tobio suggested getting ice cream at  the parlor next door. He was still hungry, and anything milk-based was always a good thing. The parlor was really cool—various pictures hung on the walls, and the shiny tiled floor made it look like the shop was brand  new. The counter had a large display of at least 30 flavors of ice cream  on display behind clear glass. The signs above the counter showed that  the parlor also served soft serve, sundaes, and milkshakes. The friendly worker greeted them, and after some deliberation, both boys decided on  milkshakes- chocolate for Tobio, strawberry for Yamaguchi.  

They found a table near the corner of the parlor, milkshakes in hand.  As they sipped their milkshakes, Tobio couldn’t help but think; God, he’s pretty. 

Was “pretty” the right word, though? Maybe it should be handsome.  Either way, Tobio wanted to look at Yamaguchi more than he looked at a  volleyball. 

Something was really wrong with him.  

Yamaguchi was cool in a lot of ways, so maybe his line of thinking  was acceptable then…? In all honesty, Tobio had no clue. He was already subpar at best with friendships, never mind actual romantic relationships.  

He hadn’t even considered being in a relationship like that until, well…  when had he considered it first? Maybe when Yamaguchi made his first  successful jump float serve in practice?  

He didn’t know for sure, but he was certainly happy to be where he was  now. Yamaguchi looked a little anxious, but Tobio couldn’t be sure. He  gave a small, nervous smile, in hopes it would… do something. Maybe he was reading the situation wrong…? 

When Yamaguchi smiled back, though, he felt his heartbeat quicken, like he’d just run several sprints.  Tobio wasn’t sure if he would get used to this feeling, but his instincts told  him it was a feeling that would last.  

~*~

Tobio and Tadashi finished their bread at Aki Cafe, a sense of nostalgia still hovering between them. Tadashi thought maybe they were too young  to feel nostalgic about a relationship that was only a little over two years, but  the pull he felt on his heartstrings and the maybe-maybe-not tear in his eye felt differently. Tadashi tried to think of something to say as they started walking out of the cafe. This time, though, it was Tobio who initiated their conversation. 

“It’ll be… hard not seeing you every day,” Tobio admitted.  

“Nothing is ever hard for you, Tobio,” Tadashi assured him. 

“Except for not seeing you every day.” 

Tadashi really loved how straightforward Tobio was. He never left Tadashi guessing; he was always honest. 

The sun started setting as they meandered along the sidewalks of  Sendai, glowing red-orange in the cloudless sky. 

“I promise to come to all of your matches,” Tadashi said as they turned  a street corner.  

“I’d rather you promise to play.” 

“We’ll see.” 

“I’ll see you on the court, then,” Tobio said firmly. 

It was comforting how much Tobio believed in him. So, Tadashi  responded by laughing as he took Tobio’s hand, the two walking side by side, with no real destination in mind in the two hours they had before  their train home. It really didn’t matter where they went though; they  would always gravitate back to each other in the end.

[itsakpopalypse]

Little Moments

St. Van/Lee Geumhyuk x Reader

Established relationship au

A/N It's fluff. Pure fluff. Self indulgent, fluffy fluff I am coughing up FUZZ rn. I'm sorry about this. No I'm not. This spiralled from that prompt generator.... so here it is.

Warnings: DISGUSTING AMOUNTS OF FLUFF I CANNOT EVEN TELL YOU. Small mention of difficulty conceiving.

“Careful!” You cried out through fits of giggles as Geumhyuk carried you bridal style through the doorway of your new home. It smelled of fresh paint and possibilities.  

His loud, beautiful laughter met your ears as he carried you down the small hallway , careful to avoid the doorway of your bedroom before placing you delicately among the linen sheets. 

“When would I ever drop you?” He asked with a pout, before attacking  your face with kisses.

All you could do was smile and press your lips sweetly to his when he reached that area of your face. 

“I never have,” He said solemnly, giving you a stern look to show he means business. “I never ever will. I’ll never let you down.”

“I know.” You responded, breathless with  bliss.

The love you felt was overwhelming. Exciting. Pure. You glanced at the ring on his large hand as he brushed your cheek, the new reality truly blinding in it’s joy. You wished for many years of moments like this.

 You wished for love.

-----

"Two eggs."  You called out to Geumhyuk from your perch on the counter, peaking over the harry potter cookbook at his well defined back as he hunched over into the fridge to pull out armfuls of necessary ingredients.  

"Got it!" He called as he raised back to his full height,  you grabbed a few of the items from him and placed them beside you on the counter so he could unload the rest of his bounty without scattering them. He leaned into your space and placed a kiss into the top of your hair affectionately before blinding you with his radiant smile.  "Now what,  perfect?" 

You giggled at his slip up.

"I think you meant Prefect?"  You correct,  setting the themed book aside as he placed himself between your swinging legs by spreading your knees a little wider.  He shook his head, sending the front of his hair into his eyes, it cast a shadow that brought mischief.  You knew that look, and bit your lip waiting for his next move.  

"No. I said what I said. You're perfect for me, and I'll never waste a perfectly good opportunity to tell you." 

Your nose scrunched but you were as flattered as he knew you'd be, the way he teased you always filled your stomach  with butterflies, even a year into living the married life. (Even if he was sometimes messy and forgot to close the shower curtain so the water didn't get everywhere)

No matter what,  his laugh (common and loud, bouncing down the halls of your shared homel) was your favorite song,  and even on the days when you bickered,  you always ended it with hugs and tender kisses,  sheets pulled up around your waist with his arms reeling you in towards his body for comfort.

"I love you." is the only thing you can think to reply, too giddy to think of anything else.

His hands trail up your arms to land at the base of your neck on either side,  pulling you in to press a kiss to the tip of your nose.  "I love you." 

You managed to untangle yourself from his grasp, hopping down and begin the actual baking, which was going well enough until he turned the hand mixer on high and flour went flying out of the bowl and over both of you, coating your shirts. He was laughing as you squealed, scrunching  in on himself as you swatted him on the butt with the dish towel you were trying to wipe down with.  

"You're a mess!!" 

He shrugged, playful light in his eyes, "You are too."   He turned from the bowl, oh, but you knew that mischievous glint... He had better not…. 

"No…. No!!" You squeak, trying to escape before he- but he's too fast, his arms too damnably long, and he's caught you before you have gotten 5 steps away. You wiggle in his grasp, trying to escape, but he holds fast.  He spins you around and with the same laughter in his eyes  that usually echoes through the halls, he leans into you and rubs his - quite  flour coated- nose against yours,  he leans back and laughs, that full bodied laugh that makes the very seams of your heart full to bursting, your giggles begin before you can stop them.  Before you know it you've collapsed into his broad chest in full fits of laughter.  

When both of you've calmed enough he presses his  lips gently so, so achingly softly against your forehead, both cheeks and your lips in turn. "You're absolutely covered. " he says it with a fond smile, but the spark in his warm eyes begins to light, and you know his mind has begun to spiral to other activities.  "Let's get you cleaned up. Baking can wait. " his voice has dropped considerably and the last thing you see before he has slung you over one  heavily muscled shoulder is the glint of his teeth as the corner  of his mouth pulls up in a smirk. 

…. Maybe baking can wait. 

You gasp when his hand comes down playfully but none too gently on your bum. "Oh. I suppose I have gotten quite dirty." You tease, knowing without looking that he is smiling wider for it. 

"Good thing I like you that way." He mumbles with a bit of a grunt as he rounds the corner up  the stairs to your shared bathroom. You crossed your fingers  and put out your wish as you did every day. 

You wished for happiness. 

You wished for love, and tonight? You'd get it.

----

You sit on the floor of the bathroom with the pregnancy test dropping from your fingers. This is the 16th consecutive month that you've failed to have a positive one.  You're trying to keep hope but you look at Geumhyuk's face and see the same worry there. You've lost some hope again today. Tears from helplessness well in your eyes. Your lip quivers as he gently pulls you into his lap, leaning back against the tub with a heavy sigh. "We'll call the doctor. They have treatments. Our family is going to be beautiful, Y/N. Don't worry so much."

You want to agree, and in some ways you do, but in others you feel guilty. As though some part of you has brought this on you both. "It's me." You mumble as the tears fall, your voice too thick with emotion to come out normally. 

He shushes you, tucking your face into the soothing expanse of his neck, so soft and smelling so strongly of the comfort that he represents.  "You know there's nothing about this that is anyone's fault. You're feeling sad. You're feeling helpless. That's okay. You're allowed to feel things. But I won't let you feel guilty.  We'll figure it out together." He spoke into your hair, lips pressing against you over and over. "It's  sad now, but one day it'll be happy." 

Your heart lifted a barely significant amount. You squeezed your eyes tight and you wished. You ached and your soul cried and you wished against everything.

You wished for family. You wished for a family.

You wished for happiness. 

You wished for love.

----

"It's raining!!" Geumhyuk called from the doorway. "Come inside before you slip!"  

You laughed, bouncing barefoot in your garden, extending a hand to him you shook your head.  "NO! Come on!!  Stop being boring! Run with me!!!"  

 Your tee shirt clung to your skin and your hair was a total mess,  mud was sticking to your calves and shins, squishy between your toes, but he lived for the adventure you brought  him, the spontaneous spirit that drew you to him.  

Shaking his head, he relented and ran out into the warm summer rain,  letting the cool drops pelt him as he chased after your bouncing form, giggling when he almost slipped. 

"When I catch you, I'm going to-" he began, hooking the hem of your shirt as you barely evaded him.

"You'll what? You'll kiss me to death??"  

He stops running for a moment,  you turn, pausing to face him. His nose scrunches up in teasing and he nods firmly. 

"Probably yes. I feel so much love I have to give you or I'll explode. So get over here and get your kisses!!!" He extends his arms wide, waiting for you to comply, knowing that you'll never be able to resist.

Smiling warmly, you happily slipped into his grasp. There were kisses  but as he slid his hands around your waist and pulled you flush against him, there was also a soft swaying of your bodies. Tucking your head under his chin, he seemed to pull you into a dance, maybe...

He began humming softly, barely audible as the pouring rain bounced off you both. 

You recognized the song. Your wedding song. You nearly cried from how full your chest felt, every breath filling you with more of his warmth. 

"I love you. You're everything I ever wished for." You say as his song  continues. 

His hands rub circles into your back. You wished for more. You wished for happiness.  

You wished for love.

------

“Y/N?” Geumhyuk’s voice brought you out of your memories, he rounded the corner with his familiar smile, one hand outstretched to grab yours. You let him grasp it and pull you closer, tucking you into his embrace. He leaned down, resting his chin on your shoulder as he also took a long look at the room you were in. 

“Lots of great memories here, huh?” His voice was wistful, thick with the same fond memories that you had been living in only moments ago. 

“Amazing ones.” You respond, pulling back to look him in the eye and smile back. His hands slide from around your waist and settle on the swell of your stomach, still small, but warm and solid.

 "Yes, and from here on we'll only be making more and more good ones."

You can't help but join in, tucking yourself into his chest as you speak in that spot between his shoulder and neck.

"Hm. Yes you're right. And hard ones and confused ones.  Lots of mistakes . Late nights and sleep deprived arguments. But love. Lots of love." you lean back to catch his gaze, full of joy and an ocean of emotion, smiling so wide his nose crinkles. As though that ocean crashed down on him at once  he leaned down into your lips, pressing his to yours softly at first, then with just enough pressure to make you feel whole inside.  

The knock on the front door broke your moment, and you gazed back with one more sigh before turning off the lights. This next chapter was sure to be the best and scariest of your shared life, but it was worth it. 

"Hey Geu-" you were interrupted by him sweeping you up into his arms.  You began laughing and trying to wiggle down, but he just laughed  and touched your foreheads together. 

"I carried you over the threshold our first day here.  Let me do it on the way out too. It's only right."  He pressed his lips to your forehead and you agreed. 

As he did exactly that you glanced back and said a silent thank you to the small home you shared. All it's memories and its joy and it's  heartbreak and its love. You hoped  whoever got it next got to feel exactly the same. 

You wished for love. 

------

---EPILOGUE-------

You hear Geumhyuk playing with your daughter, giggles from the playroom that remind you so of her father’s. You let your feet take you where you hear them, one hand stuck behind your back. 

“Mommy! Your daughter is laughing and runs toward you, wrapping chubby fingers around your free hand. Your husband is sat on the floor surrounded in mega blocks, toy cars and dolls. He has a tiara perched on top of his hair and a smile that reaches his eyes, sparkling with all the happiness you’d ever wished for. 

You have been blessed. All your wishes and more have come. 

“Princess Geumhyuk, you are quite lovely today. I come bearing news.”

He slides to his feet, capturing your daughter in one arm while he touches your face with the other. “Oh really? What news do you bring me, Ser Y/N?”

Your daughter is baby babbling and pulling on chunks of his hair but his smile is still so full and pure. You bring your hand from behind you, unclenching your fist so he can see the stick in it.

His eyes widen as they focus on the  two pink lines, mouth dropping open. 

“We weren’t even trying?” 

You shook your head, so happy you could positively explode.

His lips press to your forehead, to your daughters squishy cheek, and his eyes are shiny with tears of joy. 

He lifts you into his embrace and spins both of you as he sighs the happiest sigh.

You had wished for  happiness. For family and for joy. Most of all, you had wished for love.

[keladryhawklight]

Standing in the Light

Art by Luniara (https://www.patreon.com/Luniara) ; Kel & Sandor upon their wedding day.

10 April, 627

It was a cool spring day in the Northern highlands; the snows had finally melted away, and the wildflowers only just opened their blooms to the suns touch. Kel had made the journey up that morning, stepping through the familiar portals to arrive at the Sanctum of Light, the Silver Hand's last remote bastion in the far northern reaches of the Eastern Kingdoms. It was one of the few places she could truly commune with the Light, and today was no exception. Most of the inhabitants had still been sleeping as she arrived, only the guards nodding her way as she had made her way towards the Cathedral.

It was a shame, she had thought to herself. A shame that only the paladins of the world could come here.

For it was true; the Cathedral was glorious, aweing even. The sweeping stone floors gave way to the massive columns rose, wrapped in the greenest of ivy's. A crimson carpet, edged with the purest of threads lined the aisleway leading past row upon row of wooden pews to the pulpit. Surrounded by massive, beautiful stained-glass windows above and around, it was as if the very eyes of the Light, no, the very eyes of the heavens watched those who came for guidance. Hundreds of people had sat in the pews here, seeking exactly that; hundreds had listened, had sought, had questioned, and had found their answers in this holiest of holy places, and Kel was no exception. Certainly not this day. Instead of questioning and contemplation, she had come to give her own thanks to the Light; to thank it, and those who had walked before her in it for the blessings that had brought her to this day.

Their choice however, had fallen to a place not far from the Sanctum, and just as important to the both of them. The tomb of their fallen, Uther the Lightbringer. A place of peace, a symbol of hope and of the Light in the lands lost to the Forsaken. Sandor's homelands.

But now, she fretted. Paced back and forth in the small quarters near to where they had decided to wed. Light, was this really happening? It was not that she was nervous for what was to happen, in fact it was quite the opposite. To marry Sandor was everything to her; they had come so far, been through so much together, almost died together, at this point, it just made sense. They were made for each other, for the Light had seen fit to bring them back to each other, after so much grief. No, she could not describe this feeling she had. It was an indescribable excitement in her soul. She peeked out the window of the shack, pulling back the shutter just enough to see what was going on, for it was almost time.

Their priest stood at the top of the steps to the tomb, benevolently watching their friends and family find a spot to watch couple. Clothed in the silvery-blue Vestments of the Light, he was a member of the Bastion who had made the journey to see two of their own wed. In his hands lay his own copy of the Book of Light, well-worn and creased from years of faithful devotions. His eyes would crinkle, lit by his own personal joy at seeing the two paladins wed this day, a smile creasing his broad face.

Her chosen had dressed himself almost entirely in black and smoke-gray, his garments elegant and fine. Although he himself had not been part of the nobility, he dressed himself, in her eyes, finer than most. A black dress jacket buttoned over a silken smoke vest. Under that was a fine shirt, all of which tailored to his well honed body. His trousers also black, she could only assume he had finished with his polished dress shoes. He had combed his hair back from it's typical unruliness, trimmed his beard even for the occasion. Sandor was not one for frivolities, she knew, and the only concession he gave to something that suggested any semblance of wealth was the ring she had proposed to him with, now upon his right hand. The dark emerald winked in the sunlight as he shifted, speaking quietly with their priest.

Her eyes widened in surprise as she caught sight of whom was standing with him up there.

"It can't be," she murmured quietly, watching the well dressed rogue from afar. "Vern, you devil. Where did he find you this time?" He still owed her for those cookies and banana bread he had pilfered from her those many months ago in the offices of Light's Vigilance in Stormwind. She remembered that fondly, the pair of them ducking through the hallways, she yelling at him, even as he had crammed the baked goods into his mouth.

A knock at the door surprised her, and she let go of the shutter, turning as the door opened. One of the caretakers of the tomb, an elderly nun of the Light, poked her face in and smiled kindly.

"It is time," she nodded. "Are you ready?"

Kel took a breath. Released it with a soft smile. Picking up the simple bouquet that sat on the table nearby, she moved towards the door. "I am," she murmured. "I am ready."

Her feet carried her up the pathway until she stood at the entrance to the isle, her mismatched eyes luminous as they fell upon her beloved. Clad in a simple white gown, a white cape clasped at her shoulders with twin clasps of gold, she hovered watching for the moment his gaze fell upon her. Her wild locks tossed gently in the cool northern breeze, shining a burnished russet in the sunlight. In her hands was clasped a small bouquet of white wildflowers and ivy, bound together with a strand of delicate lace ribbon. Her cheeks flushed lightly as one emotion after another ran through her chest. Love and happiness set her features aglow, and as she took her first step towards him, a small shy smile graced her features. Her dearest companion Bacon accompanied her, scuttling along with her every step, chiming softly his own song of happiness. Step by step, she drew closer to him, butterflies dancing in her stomach. Her gaze was unfaltering as moved, watching those eyes, the ones she loved so dearly.

His gaze fell upon her as she walked down the path, his eyes brightening with each step she took towards them. She was radiant, and to him, shone brighter than the sun. He felt a lump in his throat growing as his heart beat like a drum in his chest, but he forced himself to take a few deep breaths. He smiled as she took her place opposite of him.

Soft whispers surrounded them, murmurs of approval, of joy, and the odd sniffle of the happiest of tears for the couple. They were truly blessed, having their remaining family alive from the Hollow with them, from their own faction Light's Vigilance, and now their brothers and sisters-at-arms from the 47th Infantry division there to celebrate. Kel's eldest brother Solomon, a wanderer at heat had returned from his travels; the only of her siblings to make the journey north to be there. He had declined to give her away, preferring to quietly in the wings of their celebration, but she knew in her heart that he was happy. She was blessed to have him there with her to see her wed. The soft snuffling of Sandor's dog Duke made her glance down in surprise. She barely bit back the open laugh as she caught sight of the creature, decked out in his own little tophat and coat. Nearby, the quiet yips of the puppies he had produced while they had been away filled the air. Her gaze drifted back up to Sandor's, even as her lips twitched with barely restrained amusement.

The priest chuckled softly as Keladry took her place before him. His voice rose as he began his address to their gathered friends. "Friends, family of these two before me, you are welcomed. You are all welcomed into the presence of the Light to see these souls bound together today, to witness the vows they pledge unto one another. The essence of these vows is the acceptance of one another for all facets of your souls; lover, companion, friend. Trust, loyalty, devotion, and above all, love should be given freely and without jealousy."

His eyes twinkled, and he winked at the gathered, "I have been strongly advised against a longwinded prayer about the Light, and I shall instead speak only a quick one. Let us be for a moment." His voice strengthened, that otherworldly sense of faith and warmth tinging it as he spoke again. "Light, I am just a soldier, a protector of our land-- Our king has called us to battle, when our people take their stand. I pray for strength and courage, and a heart that will never fail. For the Alliance and for valour, in a world with troubles beyond the pale. The Lights prayers are with us, wherever we may roam-- Please listen when we are lonely, and return us safely home." His head remained bowed for a moment following, the customary moment of silence for those long gone.

A soft Amen rippled through the crowd as a soft breeze blew by. They were silent for a long moment, before the priest raised his head again, his voice strong.

"Before you speak your vows to one another, we must all ask of you; Do you both pledge to share your lives openly with one another, and to speak the truth in love? Do you promise to honor and tenderly care for one another, cherish and encourage each other, stand together through all the sorrows and joys, hardships and triumphs, through all the days of your lives? Do you both pledge to remain faithful, both to yourselves, and to your faith in what the Light might bring to you in your journeys through these lifetimes together?"

Both of their voices strong, Kel and Sandor answered in unison, "We do."

"And so it has been witnessed, the first of three pledges. Let us begin your personal vows to one another. Turn to face another and join hands, if you please."

She turned, placing her hands atop his. They shook slightly in his as they touched. Her eyes found his, and she forgot how to breathe for a moment. Got lost in them for a moment. Sandor took her hands into his, lightly stroking the backs of her hands with his thumbs. He gave her hands a gentle squeeze as she peered up into his face, the love in both their faces evident as they both seemed to be in their own world with one another.

"Keladry, you may speak your vows," the priest nodded.

"My Lord Sandor, I have found the one my heart loves; to the farthest of reaches my soul can go, the highest of mountains and the lowest of lows. It was a belief that broke us, a belief that reunited us, and the Light that binds us together today. I pledge to walk with you wherever the Light takes us; into the bastions of shadows, through this life and the next. I pledge in the name of the Light that resides between us, by the lifeblood coursing through my veins, and the love I hold for you in my heart to take you Sandor to my hand, my heart, and my spirit as my chosen one. I pledge to you my first cut of meat, my first sip of my wine; from this day, it shall be only your name I cry out into the night, and into your eyes first in the morning." Her lips quirked, her voice rising in pitch as emotion strangled her for a moment. "I vow to appreciate all forms of lamps, made in Ironforge or not, with you. I vow to be your shield and your sword, as you are mine. My beloved, let us love one another, for to love is to exist peacefully and wholly into the Light."

"These words I say wholly and honestly; I swear this most sacred vow, before our family, and before the very eyes of the Light itself." Her hands shook in his, her voice cracking with emotions as she spoke to him. But even as she spoke the words, a warmth settled in her heart, a sureness that all was now right. A surety that this was her path in life.

A soft noise escaped Sandor, as he choked back tears while she spoke, his eyes stinging at her words and vows. He gave her hands another gentle squeeze as he swallowed the lump that had closed his throat.

"Sandor, it is now your turn to speak," the priest urged.

He took a breath to prepare himself, to steady his racing heart before speaking. "My dearest Kel. From the moment we met I was smitten. As our days together grew, so did my affection for you. Affection turned to yearning; and yearning turned into love. Your kind heart and loving soul has shown me the true blessings that the Light can grant. From this day, to my last day, I promise to cherish and support you. To stand at your side in all things. To shade you from the slings and barbs of the world. To be your partner in this life and the next." He smiled. "I promise to carry you home when you've had too much wine, to hold you when you cry, to share in all of life's pains and pleasures." He gave her hands another squeeze, prompting a soft broken laugh from her, even as a tear dripped down her face. Her lips mouthed a silent promise of love at him as she smiled up into his face.

"And thus it has been witnessed, the second of your three pledges. The last of your pledges is the physical binding to each other. The pair of rings you both have to give one another have been blessed by the Light here today," their priest continued. Smiling, he withdrew a small box from the folds of his robe. Etched into the box were the small symbols of the Light, blazing with the gold energy they all knew too well. Within the box were nestled a pair of simple gold bands, the metal warm to the soft spring sunlight. "A pair of rings, in the most precious of metals to speak of the most precious element the two of you share- love. These rings have no beginning, nor any end. Let these rings be your sign your love has a substance as well as soul, a present, a past, and from now forward, a future. Let these rings say that despite the many sorrow of life, love is your circle of happiness, wonder, and delight. May they remind you always, of the vows spoken here today."

Asking for a moment of their time with a soft smile, Kel bent at the waist, offering to Bacon her bouquet of wildflowers. Tucked into the lace was a note for one of their own, a wish for happiness, and as he scuttled off towards their comrade Nyla, she offered Nyla the sunniest of smiles. Their time in the hospital, while Kel had worked at removing the womans' prosthetic had told her so much about Nyla; she was afraid, but she wanted to take a step forward, hesitant to see the joy that waited for her, if she were to reach out and take it. The note wrapped in the lace read simply, 'Everyone deserves a chance at happiness. Everyone.', and Kel knew she would understand. Nyla was quiet, but she would know the meaning.

Her eyes crinkled with utter joy as she beamed at her friend, knowing that she too was embarking on her own journey, wishing all the peacefulness it could bring to her. She would then move, back to her love, and back to the ceremony. Placing her hands in Sandors' once more, she looked up at the Priest, awaiting his words.

He offered to Keladry first, one of the two bands, his kind face breaking into a soft smile at the look of utter love in her eyes. "Keladry, repeat after me," he instructed. "I, Keladry Arnia Hawklight, take you Sandor to be my husband. I promise to love and support you with kindness, understanding, truth, humour and passion. I promise to honour you, to be faithful to you, and to walk with you always through this life, and the next." He nodded, "And as you promise the last, you will place the ring fully onto his hand."

Her eyes turned to Sandor as she accepted the ring, and she murmured softly. "I, Keladry Arnia Hawklight take you Sandor to be my husband." Her voice cracked, breaking as emotion tinged her words. She was gentle, as she slid the ring partially onto his hand. "I promise to love and support you with kindness, understanding, truth, humour and passion. I promise to honour you, to be faithful to you, and to walk with you always through this life, and the next." As she slid the ring fully onto his finger, her eyes grew luminous and shiny as happiness threatened to spill over. She beamed up into his face, a soft laugh breaking from her.

"Sandor, it is now your turn to pledge the last," the priest smiled gently. Offering the man the second of the two rings, he continued. "Repeat after me. I, Sandor Brightmaul, take you Keladry to be my wife. I promise to love and support you with kindness, understanding, truth, humour and passion. I promise to honour you, to be faithful to you, and to walk with you always through this life and the next." He nodded again, "And it is here, at this last promise, that you will place the ring fully onto her hand."

Accepting the other ring, holding it gently as he peered into Keladry's mismatched eyes. "I, Sandor Brightmaul, take you Keladry to be my wife. I promise to love and support you with kindness, understanding, truth, humour and passion. I promise to honour you, be faithful to you, and to walk with you always through this life and the next." He slid the ring onto her finger, beaming with happiness and pride. His wife. His mate.

The priest raised his head to beyond the couple standing before them. His face softened, watching all of the people there for the pair. "You have all witnessed the vows of Keladry and Sandor before you here today," he intoned. "The three vows spoken in the holiest of places, before friends and family. I bid you now, go now in peace, and live in love, sharing only the most precious of gifts we have witnessed here today. You have been given the gift of your souls united; may your days be long upon this earth." His eyes drifted to Sandors, and he smiled warmly at the man. "The Light has been honoured here today by you both, and it is in my power to declare you husband and wife. Sir, you may now kiss your bride."

He pulled Keladry into a long kiss as soon as the Priest gave him leave to. Holding her closely, tenderly, looping his arms around her waist. After few moments he broke the kiss, remembering where he was. He turned, sheepishly smiling at those gathered, holding onto Keladry's hand tightly. Kel had melted into Sandor as he kissed her, even as the tears that had been threatening to spill the whole time finally spilled over. It seemed as though time stopped in that moment, for that one kiss. As he pulled back from her, her cheeks pinkened with joy at the emotion she saw blazing in his eyes. Feeling his hands around her own she laughed softly, looking down at them for a moment.

"Hello, my Lord," she whispered to him. "Hello."

[multiplefandomfics]

Elevator part 2

Norman x Reader

Warnings: smut, Norman Reedus, fluff, heartbreak,

Words: 2149

It had been 5 month since our last encounter in the hotel in Berlin. Since then I hadn’t heard a thing from Norman. I felt so used and thrown away it was embarrassing. But I had my pride and wasn’t gonna call or text him before he did. I was so angry at myself. How could I have been so dumb to think a film star like Norman Reedus would want something permanently from a girl like me? He could get any model type woman he wanted so why choose me? I made a total fool of myself and when I noticed that I immediately called my friend to cry.

I was so heartbroken that I wasn’t even able to enjoy the beautiful summer vacation with my friend to Great Britain. I was constantly in a bad mood it got even worse when I saw all the pictures on his Instagram account.

The weather was still amazing when September came around and I was sitting on my balcony at home when my phone rang. I was so in thoughts that I didn’t even look at the screen of my cell phone when I took the call. “Ja.” I said. “hello beautiful!” Immediately I was wide awake. “How dare you call me after almost half a year and then you come around with hello beautiful?” I yelled at him and walked inside my apartment. My neighbors didn’t have to know about the drama going on here. “I’m really sorry darling. I know I hurt you badly by not calling but at first I was really busy filming when I came back to the states and then time flew by so fast that I doubted such an amazing woman would still be available that’s why I didn’t call. And I know that is a shitty excuse but I just had to try my luck now. I couldn’t get you out of my mind sweetheart.” he sounded sincere but what did I know he was an actor after all so I stayed silent except for a “Pfft” he sensed my doubts and added suggestively: “I just have to see you again and as luck would have it I’m in town. Come meet me sweetheart and I show you how much I missed you.” “I don’t know.” I teased him. I didn’t want to let him know that his voice and words had already convinced me to give him a second chance. “Please?!” he begged and I could almost see his puppy dog eyes through the speaker. “Alright. Where and when?” I caved in.

Two hours later we met at his hotel in my town. My city was not the biggest so neither was the hotel. I had come on my bike to show off a little and he had mentioned he had rented one here and wanted to go for a ride maybe. He was already waiting for me in the lobby when I entered with my helmet over my arm. “Hey sweetheart. It’s so good to see you. I missed ya.” he hugged me tight. “Thank you for giving me this second chance.” he added. “Yeah I was hardly inclined not to come but then I wanted to know what you had to say.” I stayed emotionally distant not least because he had hurt me before and I didn’t want to head head first into a car crash again. We sat there for about an hour with coffee and talked. About his shows and new projects and he asked me about my work which was boring as always but he seemed intrigued nonetheless. It honestly felt like home with him and I couldn’t erase the warm feeling in my belly. We sometimes laughed so hard it hurt. It was wonderful. “So you wanna ride?” he suddenly asked. “eh yeah certainly.” I replied. We got ready and swung ourselves on our bikes. We had synchronized our speakers and started uphill and onto the street into the countryside. “Eat my dust Reedus.” I exclaimed and pushed the accelerator. “Not today Darlin.” he tried to catch up but failed miserably or maybe he wanted to let me win. I had to admit I was slowly falling for him again. On another thought I think I never really stopped. We held at a dam, bought ice cream and sat on a bank. “So how do you feel doing a slightly longer tour with me? Maybe coming into my show? I love riding with you.” he suggested. “Why? Norman seriously. What is this going on between us? The tension is killing me. You are sending me signals and I have no idea where to put them. Be honest with me. Am I just a fling for you? A girl for a little fun and a few nights? Or is there something real? I can’t take another hit.” I stared deeply into his eyes. He turned toward me and grabbed my hands. “How could you ever be just a fling to me? I fell for you the moment I stepped into the elevator all those month ago. And I was so jealous when Jeff constantly flirted with you even though I knew you weren’t mine back then.” he made a short break before saying: “Are you now? Mine I mean?” he asked almost shy. His eyes hidden by his long strands of hair. I had to swallow strongly. I was so enticed by him. He had me under his spell. “Yes.” I barely whispered. “Please don’t make me regret this decision.” I had tears in my eyes but the reason was still unclear at that moment. Happiness or fear of being heartbroken again. After my response I suddenly had his lips firmly pressed to mine as his hands ventured to my hips to pull me closer. I was a little taken aback but kissed him back eagerly. “So motorcycle tour?” he repeated his question as he pulled a little away from me. “Definitely yes. Anywhere, anytime.” I felt so confident about it. “What about now. I got a few weeks.” he suggested. “Now? Yeah why not. I just call my boss and quit. My job is damn boring and if we want to go further on this I can go with you. I’ll find a job anywhere.” this was going fast but it all felt right so I didn’t care. Maybe I was naive but every rational thought felt so far away. “Really? He asked excitedly. I nodded. “God I love you.” he added and then realized what he had just said. “Don’t worry I love you too.” I answered encouraged. “What about you life here? Friends, Family?” suddenly Norman sounded concerned. “Oh that won’t be a problem. I’m not close with any family and my only friend is (Y/F/N)  and she can come with us. She hates her job as much as I do and we are only available as a couple!” I stated. His shoulders relaxed visibly at my statement and he smiled again. “Then it is settled. We make a tour of Germany or maybe even Europe and then we get you a visa and go home.” he was excited as hell I could tell. I felt as happy as I hadn’t in years.

Said, done we went to his hotel, grabbed his stuff and brought it to my house for safekeeping. We took the necessities for the road and started driving. My job was long history too. First we visited all sorts of beautiful cities and places in my country. After a week we drove through France and then Spain and Portugal. From Calais we crossed the sea over to Dover and from then we made our journey through England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland. It was magical. The landscape and people were amazing. After four weeks of touring the west side of Europe we found ourselves back in my home town. We had already talked to (Y/F/N) and she had agreed to move with you, threw her job out of the window and applied for a visa which was granted to both of us. At least for 6 month then we had to get creative. Before we wanted to fly to New York we sent my bike and some big belongings, which couldn’t be taken by plane on the way by ship. I had worried about the fact that I was younger than him by over 20 years for some time. Especially when it came to his son. But after video chatting with him a few times I thought he really started to like me. He was so much like his dad.

The last night in my apartment before the move we spent in bed. I woke up late that day with him kissing my neck and sucking at all the right spots. If that wasn’t a way to wake up. “Mhhh mornin’” I mumbled smiling. “Mornin babe.” he whispered against my neck. “Please Norman. I need you. I had a dream about you. A very nice one.” “Hmm what did I do? Tell me.” he kept kissing his journey toward my cleavage. I was so distracted by his mouth that I almost forgot to answer and I knew what that would bring me. “You were between my legs eating me out like the champ you are, baby.” I moaned. “hmm sounds nice. I am in for some breakfast.” I wasn’t able to see him moving so fast was he as he pulled the blankets away and buried his head between my legs. We were still naked from the activities the evening before. “Oh god Norm.” I moaned and threw my head back in pure pleasure. His tongue first drew pattern, I expect it to be his name, on my clit before he buried it in my slick cunt. I was already gushing and he hadn’t touched me much yet. When he entered two fingers suddenly I screamed his name and saw stars. I loved it when his long fingers crooked inside me and hit that one spot that had me trashing and slobbering all over the place. “Fuck. Harder.” I was only able to say one word sentences but he obliged. And soon I came all over his hand screaming his name. “Did that feel good baby?” he asked self assured. But he didn’t have to wait for an answer because I jumped his bones straddling his hips and stroking his hardening member. “Yes (Y/N) just like that.” he groaned. I loved the raspy sound of his voice. It got even deeper when he was in ecstasy. In that moment I couldn’t wait any longer so I raised myself on my knees and sank down on him. We both groaned in unison at the tight fit. He was huge and it always surprised me that he fit at all but after some adjustment time it felt like home. I could feel every vein on his cock and started to bounce slightly. He met my thrusts at every downward move by snapping his hips upward. “Feels so good baby. Hmm so tight and wet.” he groaned eyes closed enjoying the feeling of me taking charge for once. But after a while of me slowly moving up and down his length he had enough and flipped us so I was laying underneath him. With my heels pushed into his ass his leverage increased tenfold and he pistoned his hips in hard and fast just the way I liked it. “Yes don’t stop Norman. Feels amazing. Love your cock.” I moaned loudly and clenched around him signaling for me to reach my release shortly after. I screamed loudly. I had never been a screamer before but he pushed me onto new levels of euphoria. He kept pummeling his hips into my oversensitive pussy at an ungodly pace which brought me to another mind blowing orgasm as he found his release inside me. He pushed himself off of me and laid panting beside me. The only noises in the room where our ragged breathing and the tick tock of the alarm clock on the bedside table. After he was able to move again he got up and grabbed a washcloth from the bathroom to clean the mess up we had left between my thighs.

After that amazing last day we packed our remaining items picked up (Y/F/N) from her home and drove to the airport. We checked in to our flight and waited until we could board. We phoned some people in the meantime we wanted to say good bye to and then it was off to a new life. I couldn’t believe this was gonna happen but I was sure as hell gonna take what was about to come. I had finally found what I was missing in my life and I was not gonna let it go.

[shikastemari]

hormones - b&s.

pairing boruto uzumaki x sarada uchiha

request

word count 1,741

when it happens they’re 25 here

warnings none

a/n now my notes will be after the text to avoid telling y’all any kind of spoilers!

MASTERLIST

“Lollipops.” Boruto repeated his wife, his brows furrowing at what she had just told him.

Sarada was laying on the couch, wearing a top, her hand traveling her eminent belly. She was two months pregnant and recently, Boruto noticed Sarada and her hormones had been battling a strong fight for control inside her. He also realized her hormones had won quite frequently.

The blond boy was standing next to her, glancing down, fighting the urge to sit down and pull her to a tight hug. He knew that if he actually did it, he wouldn’t let go of her.

“Please, Boruto. I haven’t asked for anything until now!” Sarada whined, she stretched her hand and tugged her hand on his pants, pulling him closer.

He frowned. “You literally asked for a lemonade yesterday.”

“I was thirsty! Now, it’s not a request for me, it’s for your son.” Sarada pointed her free hand to her belly.

“It’s a girl.” Boruto stated, and then, he shook his head. “A lollipop.” He giggled.

“What’s so funny?” Sarada sat straight on the couch, crossing her arms across her chest.

“It’s just… Shikadai called me yesterday and said his wife is having the weirdest cravings ever and here you are, asking for a lollipop.” Boruto sat next to her, his hand instinctively going to touch her belly gently. He always loved every time his skin connected to hers, feeling the tiny chakra of their kid on his palm.

“Why did you sit? Go buy my lollipop.” Sarada pushed him away from the couch, and Boruto pouted when he lost contact with her.

“I want to spend some time with my baby girl.”

“I don’t want you. I want a lollipop!” She exclaimed, pushing him even further.

“I was talking about our daughter.” He deadpanned, leaning in to give her a quick peck on the lips.

“It’s a boy! I know it.”

Boruto felt her words shaking, and suddenly he knew she was on verge of tears.

“Okay, okay. Which lollipop do you want?” Boruto caught both of her hands on his, kissing every single finger while she was thinking about her answer.

“The one we used to have when we were kids.”

“But, honey, they are not produced anymore. They haven’t in years.” Boruto informed her.

Tears began to pool on the corner of her eyes, and Boruto felt his heart shattering. He hated to see her crying, especially when she had no control over it.

“Please, don’t cry. I’ll figure out, okay? Lemme see what I can do for both loves of mine.” He leaned in and gave her a butterfly kiss.

Boruto had no idea how he would find it, but something on the back of his mind told there might be a place that could help him.

The last time Boruto stepped on that same store, was when he forgot to bring his little sister a present from a Kiri trip he did. Sarada had told him about this particular store where food from everywhere was sell. The owner, an old lady, made him play cards against her, only because she didn’t like him and didn’t want to sell him what he needed. Boruto only hoped that, by now, she would have forgotten about him.

“Not you again.” Was the first thing he heard as soon as he stepped a foot on the old place. An even older woman was standing behind the balcony, with someone at his age. Boruto recognized her as soon as his eyes laid on her.

“I really need your help. Is there any chance you have any of those fruit lollipops that were fabricated years ago? I don’t quite remember the brand, but they were blue and very sticky.”

“Second shelter, on the corridor 4.” The younger woman said, without taking her eyes from the bill she was staring at.

“No!! I am not selling you anything! Once a cheater, always a cheater. There is no way-“ The old woman stopped talking to cough a little bit.

“Look. I know I was a little pain in the ass in the past, but I really need it. My wife’s craving it badly, and she is crying, and PLEASE.” Boruto didn’t think he had ever heard himself so desperate before, but it was his first child, so he thought he had a green card to be feeling like that.

“Fine, but you are playing cards against me and no cheating this time!” The lady said, and Boruto just nodded.

It would be a long afternoon.

Except that, it wasn’t.

The lady slept on the first round and her helper decided to sell Boruto the candy. He knew the old lady wouldn’t approve it once she woke up, but he had no time to feel guilty about it.

Sarada was still on the couch, sitting there with a bucket of popcorn on her hands, watching some random movie with a dog and her face was writhing for crying for so long. The tears on her face were already dry when Boruto stopped next to her.

“Borutooooo, the dog died.” She cried a little bit more, hugging a cushion.

“We literally watched that film yesterday and you scolded me for crying.” Boruto giggled, aching to just reach out and take her little bump in his hands and not let go.

“It’s different and you know it.” Sarada hissed at him, rolling her eyes.

“Don’t be mad at me. Look what I have for you.”

Boruto then waved the bag with the lollipops in front of her face. Quickly, her attitude changed and he noticed how sparkling her eyes became.

“I can’t believe, why did you take so long?” She took the bag from his hand, hugging it.

“I had to check the validation date for those and also call your mother to make sure it would be prejudicial both for you and the baby.” Boruto let his body fall on the couch, jolting his head towards her.

“And?” That got Sarada’s attention, her tone filled with worried.

“All good. Your mother literally made me tell her every component from the candy so she could check it was fine.” Boruto was damn tired, but the smile on her face made everything worth it.

She quickly disposed the paper, shoving the entire thing on her mouth. Boruto sighed, relief, leaning in to rest his head on her bump.

“Boruto, I don’t think this is the right time to tell you, but I am kind craving something else.”

“Already???? This is not possible.” He wrapped his arms around her, pressing his ear on her stomach. “Please, don’t send me away, I want to stay here with my little princess.”

“PrinCE.” She corrected, her hands caressing his gold locks gently. “But don’t worry, what I am craving is not to send you away. It’s completely the other way around.”

Boruto peered up to a raised eyebrow Sarada looking at him.

“Oh.”

“Oh indeed.” Boruto took the candy from her mouth and shove into his.

“I can’t.” He blurted out, averting his gaze, embarrassed.

“Wait, why?” Sarada pulled his hair strongly, making him face her once again. “By the way, you know you just took candy away from a kid, right?”

“There’s a baby inside you.” He answered her first question, completely ignoring the second one.

“And? It’s recommended by the doctors.”

“Are you seriously telling me your mother told you to have sex with me with my baby inside you?” Boruto narrowed his eyes and Sarada laughed.

“No! It’s an universal knowledge!”

“What if-“

“Please don’t continue this question.” Sarada leaned in, pressing a kiss on his forehead. “It’s not that bi-“

“PLEASE DON’T CONTINUE WHATEVER YOU INTEND TO SAY.” Boruto sat straight on the couch, as Sarada threw her head back, laughing hardly. “Are you sure it is okay?”

“Yes.” She informed him, grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him closer. Sarada slipped a palm behind Boruto’s neck, pulling her husband to rest his forehead against her shoulders. “Very sure.”

Boruto sighed. “Thank goodness, you look the hottest I’ve seen and all I want is to have you right here, right now.”

“I don’t want this anymore.” Sarada smiled slyly.

“Wait, why?” He jerked back, not able to comprehend what was happening between them anymore. Sarada’s humor was changing so fast he felt he couldn’t follow it, so he did the only thing he could: he just accepted it.

“I just want to cuddle.”

Boruto sighed, shaking his head, incredulous. “I don’t know where you end and where your hormones begin.”

Boruto crawled until they were side by side on their tiny couch. He spooned her, slipping his hands lovingly to take the swell of a child in his calloused palms like it was the sole purpose his hands were made for.

He didn’t doubt it was the truth, though. The skin of Sarada’s belly felt more like home than any place ever did.

“Boruto?”

“Yes?”

“I’ve never been this happy in my entire life.” Sarada whispered, eyes lighting up like constellations.

Boruto allowed himself a tiny grin at that. “Good, this is the most important thing to me. I’ll work hard to make you the happiest mother in the world, and I know our little girl will help me.”

“What makes you think it’s a girl?”

“I don’t know, honestly. I feel it.”

Sarada drew a breath inside of her mouth, exhaling through her nose with a roll of her eyes, but inside, she felt her heart warm by his words. “And I feel it’s a boy.”

“Maybe we’re having twins.” He pressed a kiss to the side of her temple.

“We would go crazy.” Sarada retorted in absolute happy disbelief.

Boruto nodded, grinning. “We are going crazy anyway. It’s me and you combined. This kid will be the most devilish and the smartest. We have to stick together or we are not going to survive it.”

“Stop being so dramatic.” She clicked her tongue and turned to face him, his hands smoothed down the small of her back, pulling her closer to press her body against his. “You will continue to love me even if my hormones drive you crazy?”

“And you are calling me dramatic?” Sarada raised her brow. “I will love you no matter what. It’s a promise and you know Uzumaki’s don’t break their promises.”

“I know.” She smiled, resting her head on his chest and closing her eyes.

a/n

so here it is, sorry for taking so long! i literally don’t know why such a simple word as lollipop gave me this idea but why not. 

@kairi-chan i don’t think i need to say how much i love your fics, because i feel like i’ve been saying it quite a lot. thank you for your request and for always being such inspiration!

a little fluff to our lives since it seems like all i have written is pure angst.

[taejinkive]

Taste Of Your Love- 32

Taehyung’s eyes were unfocused, his breathing uneven he felt as if a huge tide had swallowed him and then threw his remains against a stone paved bank- taking with it his most precious possession. Seokjin’s lifeless-looking body laid in the hospital bed surrounding the two of them in a choking silence- one that is too devoid of air. Too devoid of Seokjin. Because to Taehyung, Seokjin was as important as the air. The air around his room in his apartment when the younger was pressed against the former’s chest was soft, sweet with their lingering hushed midnight whisperes that had gently mixed with Seokjin’s own special smell- a smell that took Taehyung back to his hometown. Back to the fields he loved running around as a kid. Back to simple, quite yet imparting an exquisite warmth- Daegu. He loved every moment with Seokjin. But not this. Not when the latter was lying in a motionless state with the pale yellow hospital walls around them.

When he went to Seokjin’s apartment, with a big smile and a huge box of his boyfriend’s favorite chocolates he half expected to see Jimin vigorously tapping on his phone and then pressing it to his ears. Taehyung felt his own phone vibrate in his pocket and curiously went up to the younger boy standing by Seokjin’s door with a picture of distress on his face.

“You were calling me?” He asked. Seokjin’s apartment door was open and Taehyung peeked inside searching for his lovely boyfriend. He couldn’t wait to see his cute, cute Seokjin in the new haircut. If a picture could make him look that perfect, how good would he look in person?

“Taehyung I… Seokjin.. he,” Jimin hesitated. He knew how Taehyung would feel the moment he hears the news. Despite being an asshole previously, Taehyung had changed so much over the past months. And he loves Seokjin so much… Jimin felt a phang in his chest.

“I was texting Seokjin but then he made weird typos. Something told me he was not fine. Probably because the same happened when he fainted the previous time…I dont know but… I found him passed out in his apartment,” Taehyung gasped. “I just sent him to the hospital as soon as possible before calling you.”

Taehyung stood there shell shockef for a few minutes and then everything happened so fast. Before he knew he was once again sitting by Seokjin. 5 hours since then- somewhere, some time ago, I heard a clock strike one. Seokjin’s being was still still.

Taehyung sat with his mind in a frenzy. A mess and a complete utter chaos. But he had always been a mess, he thought bitterly. He was an insecure mutt and spent a good part of his life denying Seokjin’s place in his existence. Heck, if thought carefully, he was the reason why Seokjin suffered and why he keeps suffering. If he told his beautiful soul that it was infact connected to Taehyung’s the very day he discovered bit, maybe Seokjin would stay back. Maybe the godforsaken flight would have no Kim Seokjin in it. Maybe now the older would not have to bear the burden of a truth Seokjin was yet to recall. The burden of his follish, childish past.

Seokjin was like little blooming rose amidst the harsh thorn bush that he was. His rough edges were too many and showed too often. Taehyung was impulsive- contemplating about things before taking any decisions were often not a part of his checklist. This made him hurt many without meaning too. He was too egotistical and thus, saying ‘sorry’ was hard for him. He was often irrational, confused and so stubborn. But then… Seokjin happened. Seokjin took Taehyung’s hand and told him how to show his emotions properly, guided hin through the extreme relief that is apology and acceptance. Seokjin’s small smiled when Taehyung would pause before saying something that would lead to misunderstanding during fights always made Taehyung proud. Proud that he managed to stop an argument. Satisfying Seokjin felt good. So so good.‘Perhaps this is truly the meaning of having a soulmate-’ he thought, ‘- to have someone bring out your best.’

His heart thumped against his chest and he continued starting at the pale cheeks of his lover under the hospital lights. Oh how much he adores holding Seokjin’s shy hands when they are out for a date- even after so many months, Seokjin still was shy when it came to PDA.His face would cover into a pretty blush and he would hide his smile under his free hand while casting his eyes at the ground. But the very same shy Seokjin was the most confident person he ever met. Always going on about how he is ‘worldwide handsome’ and that his face is his most important feature. Yet he was so insecure of his fingers because they were double-jointed and uneven. Taehyung wanted to kiss each and every one of them and tell Seokjin that he loves his fingers no less than he loves hi-

Snap!

It’s like a hidden door behind Taehyung’s head gave a red singnal. White and red lights filled his eyes and his hands felt extra clammy, extra, sweaty. His brain hit void he was unable to think of anything else.

I love Seokjin. I Love Him- Kim Seokjin! I am in love with Kim Seokjin!

Taehyung was combusting.

Shoving his phone back into his pocket, Taehyung suddenly felt the presence of a smile on his lips. ’Feels this good to be in love, huh?" He smiled, “Seokjin wake up fast! I have a lot to tell you!” He whispered to the man before him.

Taehyung almost missed the way the younger's fingers trembled and his lips quivered, the previously resting eyelashes fluttered against the puffy hamster cheeks. The older was about to jump in celebration. It was almost as if the powers has heard his prayer.

“Seokjin! You’re up? Gosh you scared me,” Taehyung said with a relieved sigh. He felt as if someone poured life into him. Watching the constant dynamic Seokjin had become such a regular habit that stagnant Seokjin scared him. He felt as if Seokjin would forever remain that way. Cold and motionless.

“Here, drink some wat-” before the older could register what was going on, the glass flew out of his hand and shattered into a million pieces against the white floor. Taehyung was shoked, his heart was jumping in his chest. He looked at Seokjin with bewilderment written on his face only to meet with blazing eyes. Seokjin’s face twisted into an expression that made Taehyung feel sick in his stomach. He gulped at the sheer intensity of Seokjin’s fiery glare.

“S-seokjin?” Somewhere, from deep within, Taehyung’s voice drew out a small, scared whisper. He felt his eyes become teary- ‘what happened to him?’ his mind kept asking the same question in vain.

“You,” Seokjin’s voice wasn’t very strong but the venom laced in it was piercing through Taehyung’s heart.

"You lied to me. More than once."

__________________

Taste Of Your Love

previous-Chapter 32-next

AUTHOR’S NOTE/SYNOPSIS

I WOULD LIKE TO MENTION AGAIN THAT IN THIS STORY SEOKJIN IS THE MAKNAE AND JIMIN IS YOUNGER THAN JUNGKOOK

I was ranting so much in my previous post that I forgot to warn y'all that the second climax of the story is going to start from the next chapter so please be prepared. I can't wait for y'all to see the ending tbh because I have it all thought out shsvsj. The comeback has officially made me an emo hoe. Today i gave a horrible English Language exam i forgot to title my notice and email. I guess 2 marks gone and i also wrote some crappyass essay so much marks gone uwu

____

Taejin/Jikook Soulmate AU

[based on social media and texts]

AU where, when people turn 18, they get to slightly taste the food which their soulmate is having.

Stuck in the fate-tied world, Kim Taehyung, world famous music artist, strongly distastes the concept. Why would nature decide who he is to love and date?

Kim Seokjin, however, is always waiting for the warmth of his soulmate, that was made just for him. He desperately wants to find the person nature has gifted him.

But, no road is formed without bumps and we seldom find it easy to get what we yearn for the most. The undeniable bond between the two of them teach them how to give up, own up, forgive and find the happiness that’s created just for them.

or,

In which Jimin and Jungkook are tired of all the angst like?? please get together and live in peace and let us live in peace to thank you very much.

[lordshaxx]

the one-horned speaker

    the visions had become clearer shortly after cayde died and, for the longest time, shaxx kept them to himself. the traveler never bothered with him and he has things to do ----- gates to keep and taken to banish; his loyalties had been split in half, dedication questioned by either side as innocents died and all he could do was watch with a sorrowful gaze. his strength has barely climbed to half of what it was back in the distributary -- shackled by darkness yet growing back quickly due to an awakened traveler.

    he knew it would only be a matter of time before the consensus grew desperate and, in the wake of their indecisiveness and bias, ran out of candidates to vote for to replace the speaker. the traveler’s chosen -- that blessed guardian -- had gone mad with rage, their anger only tempered briefly by the deaths of uldren and his barons though now consumed with an addictive need to purge the dreaming city of its curse. played right into mara’s hands.

    zavala and ikora were shattered upon their grief ----- ikora melting into a rage just barely shy of bursting from its perfectly wrapped package she had tucked away in her heart. zavala drew further into himself, forced his gaze inward and closer to the city -- guilt gnaws at the both of them and with their image of unification broken, they fell quickly from the consensus’s eyes.

    there’s a brief moment of consideration toward lord saladin and osiris both but they had been brushed away quickly. saladin no longer had a penchant to lead, no longer had that fire, and osiris... well, he’s osiris -- power fallen from grace of the city’s favor.

    and so, all eyes turn to the one authority figure barely holding a group of crazed and grief-stricken immortals together. he voices soft sorrow to the fall of a dear friend but his grip around order remains tight, even as he momentarily disappears to the dreaming city. if only to restore guardian order there when they grow out of petra’s control.

    the gatekeeper of two great cities. secret confidant of mara sov. hero of twilight gap, six fronts-- hell, even the red war. a man who laughs at death as he breaks its arm. the last man standing. there’s not many others they can consider, not many still living or willing enough with his kinds of credentials.

    he sees the question before it falls from the consensus member’s -- arctur han, he thinks, he forgot immediately after he was told -- mouth, but it doesn’t stop him from letting out a ridiculous scoff as he turns to look out the broad window in his barely-used office. his view faces the city, he likes having the traveler in view, seeing it pulse softly with renewed energy. tonight, it does little to soothe the spike of irritation? annoyance? no he doesn’t know what he feels. it’s not familiar.

    “ that’s not a question, ” he says as he finally turns around to look at the dully robed mortals. there’s a flicker of fear that seems to pass through arctur’s gaze and shaxx can’t help the slight smirk that forms beneath his helm. “ i was wondering how long it would take you bumbling fools to come to a decision. ”

    “ w-well, s-s-sir-- ” shaxx holds his hand up, effectively silencing the nervous stuttering before it can really begin.

    “ don’t bother. i’ve been to too many of those inane meetings to know how it works. functions like a stuttering clock on its last legs if you ask me, ” the last part is a grumble as he walks over to his desk, placing his hands flat on the mahogany top. he leans forward, bracing his weight on his hands, making the wood creak uncertainly as arctur and his companions shift nervously, fidgeting more the further shaxx leans over that small barrier.

    his helmet shifts, clicks, and falls away, folding in on itself and away from his face to reveal a terrifyingly wide and toothy smile, eyes glimmering with the knowledge of a man who imagined what he would do in this sort of position should he have been given it countless times. lord shaxx is a man with the knowledge of who his enemies are in this mortal ring ----- and he knows exactly how to weed them out.

    “ so, ” comes the amused purr, “ when’s the coronation? ”

    shaxx doesn’t like the speaker’s robes. he’d heard the complaint from the previous speaker himself numerous times and when the tailors attempt to drape the new robes on his sturdy form, shaxx burns them off immediately, not caring to leave himself bare. he announces loudly as he brushes the ash off his shoulders that he would design something far more comfortable and practical before he turns and marches out of the room. the helmet stayed on.

    the titan comes back an hour later, fully clothed, with a handful of sketches, immaculately drawn and he explains them in even greater detail as the tailors pour over them. they begin immediately once choosing a practical and favorable design, shaxx watching them stitch for stitch, thread for thread. he doesn’t interfere, no, seeming confident that they can handle it on their own, but nonetheless, he remains until they finish late into the night.

    he waits until the last tailor leaves, hearing the door close softly, before he walks over to the mannequin and inspects it one last time. after one walk around, it’s then that he finally grabs some armor paint, dipping his fingers in gently, and he draws one long vermilion stripe down the immaculate chest piece. he bows his head, hand resting at the edge of the stripe, and he heaves a long sigh once his silent prayer is finished and stows away the paint.

    now, he’s ready.

    the titan doesn’t expect such a huge turn out to his coronation, i.e. the entire city. and then he remembers that while the people know the vanguard had shattered, they don’t know the finer details of cayde’s death -- of how broken the tower and its commanders truly are. and so, the city streets leading from the tower to the traveler are littered with people, decorations strung up along the buildings and confetti raining down from above as the procession of sparrows make their way through.

    the cheering is deafening, almost making shaxx want to cringe at the wall of noise that surrounds him on either side, but he keeps his wits about as they continue forward. he hadn’t know that the consensus and the speaker were so strongly celebrated ----- he never paid much attention to the celebrations of the city if they never made it to the tower. for the coronation of the speaker, a private banquet is usually held after the ceremony -- spent with guardian consensus members and other heads of the democracy -- those are what he attends.

    but this... this is all new to him.

    by the time they make it to the temple directly beneath the traveler, shaxx’s ears are surely numb and his claws are trying desperately to break through his gloves as he dismounts his sparrow, staring up at the endless steps leading into the temple. he sucks in a breath and squares his shoulders as someone comes up behind him and clasps the furred cape over his right shoulder.

    he walks with purpose, his strides long and elegant, head held high, just as saladin taught him all those years ago. never falter, never hesitate -- even if you don’t know what you’re doing, simply looking as if you do can get you anywhere. and so he strides up the steps of the intricate temple, never tearing his gaze from the entrance until he finally makes it inside and the cool air blows over him and the doors close to block out the voices of the city.

    his ears ring as he looks around the dim hall, taking in every branch, every torch, and every guard stationed around. there isn’t much in terms of decoration, save for the occasional plants or bench, and the long carpet spread before him and it doesn’t change as he traverses into the main chamber where the head consensus members await him. zavala, ikora, the newly appointed shiro, the faction leaders, even saladin who stands at the head of the small semi-circle.

    the old iron lord has his helmet off, a lacquered oak box in his hands, and he offers a small yet proud smile as the traveler’s glow falls upon shaxx when he steps into the ring. shaxx’s heart swells and warms at the sight even as kneels before them, placing a hand on his knee. ikora and zavala’s smiles don’t quite reach their eyes, grief still clouding them, but he sees the faintest glimmers of hope threaten to break through, and for shaxx ,that is enough.

    saladin opens the oak box, revealing the speaker’s mask, redecorated into the familiar colors of shaxx’s old helm, and shiro moves to remove it. as the new hunter vanguard strides forward, saladin’s deep voice reverberates throughout the small chamber, echoing out into the city as he recites an ancient oath,

    “ lord amia shaxx forge, on this day of remembrance and in this age of recollection, do you cast aside your name, your title, and your past to serve the city and the traveler as its oracle and becomer of the future? ”

    “ i do. ”

    “ do you swear yourself to call upon your visions and dreams in truth and honesty as the traveler intended, imparting your given wisdom to the consensus of the people to further our future into a peaceful golden age and the end of the darkness’s reign? ”

    “ i do. ” with the last words of lord shaxx spoken in the chamber, the mask rests over his face, obscuring his vision momentarily until the hud activates and he is given the sight of the consensus proclaiming together,

    “ from here until irreparable death, the holy voice of the traveler is reborn ----- arise, o blessed speaker, arise! ”

    getting to his feet, the speaker squares his shoulders and puffs out his chest, stance tall and proud. there was going to be a lot of work to do in the coming months, but for tonight, he will relish in his new role.

    his first meeting as the speaker happens the day after his coronation and he’s not surprised. they want to catch him off guard, unprepared, to hound him and prove that he’s not a capable leader and perhaps drive him out and replace him with an unsuitable stand-in. but he knows their tricks, knows how they think, and he walks in with a list.

    the speaker remains standing even as the full consensus hall is seated and he looks at the dark and hooded faces out in the dimness. he eyes narrow as he picks out particular faces, watching as they fidget when he turns his head towards them, and there’s a soft snort. they know and if they don’t they’ll figure it out soon.

    “ welcome! ” he booms out, letting out a soft laugh at the way the consensus jumps at his voice and he claps his hands together, spark dancing between his palms. “ how convenient that you should all convene today! there are a number of items i would like us to... consider before moving forward to heavier topics. ”

    “ what would you like to go over, speaker? you have our attention, ” ikora says gently, her firm tone killing any noise of protest that had any hope of springing up.

    the speaker spreads his hands out and from the arc springs up bright blue holograms, six panels in total that begin rotating around his broad form. the panels begin streaming dozens of names, and he relishes in the terror that begins to grow on some members’ faces.

    “ today, my dear consensus, we will be cleaning house. ”

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Incubus!Chase Brody x Magician!Reader

I saw a post that had the idea of Chase being an Incubus so I got inspired.

This story will not have anything explicit or any major NSFW content (only v minor talk about intercourse will occur throughout since we are talking about an Incubus here).

So w/o further to do here we go-

After what seemed like an eternity, you’ve finally figured it out.

You now knew how to summon any sort of demon you desired. Each one had their own special pentagram that must be drawn correctly and precisely before you could light the candles.

Even though your brother, Marvin, strongly advised against you tapping into demonology and the dark arts, you went ahead anyway to satisfy your curiosity.

Once you had finished drawing the pentagram that would summon a demon called an “Incubus”, you took a step back to make sure the image in your book matched the one on the floor. You also checked to see that the candles were in the right positions.

What compelled you to choose an Incubus out of all demons is beyond you, although you knew how to keep him at bay should he…..try anything.

Using levitation, your book hovered beside you, showing you the page with the summoning spell. You pulled out your small ritual knife from your cloak pocket, removing one of your gloves.

Taking a deep breath, you looked at the bolded words and began to speak them slowly and clearly. “Lilith, sweet Lilith, I ask that you hear my call. I ask that you send onto this earth one of your sons. And I shall allow him to fulfill any desires he wishes. Please, take this offering.”

Then you carefully sliced your palm with the knife, watching the small stream of blood trickle onto the center of the pentagram.

It was then you felt a sudden chill rush through you and then…..a portal opened up in the circle as the candles blew out at the same time.

You held your breath as a clawed, black hand emerged from it moments later. The creature slowly rose up from it, standing on his…..hooves?

Titling your head to the side, you gazed at him. You blushed slightly at the rather revealing outfit he had on, although you expected no less from an Incubus.

 A devilish tail swayed gently behind him, and only his arms were black, the rest of his upper body sporting a pale complexion.

But strangely enough he had the lower body of a satyr and….some kind of snapback hat you’ve seen teens wear all too often. It was then you began to wonder if you made a mistake somehow-

“Like whatcha see, baby~?”

You blinked in surprise as the Incubus spoke, smirking as he leaned against the wall. Then he looked down at the pentagram and candles, skipping over them. “Lucky me to be summoned, eh?” He chuckled softly, his glowing blue eyes gazing into your [e/c] ones curiously. “What’s your name sweetheart?”

“[Y/n],” you replied to him, your heart pounding a mile a minute. “And..yours?”

“Chase. Short and simple.” He grinned, flashing his sharp teeth. “Wanna see what I can do?”

Already you were having second thoughts, but since you’ve made it this far you knew there was no going back. So you nodded. “Alright..but-”

However, a ball made of smoke appeared in his hands. Then he turned and went to shoot it into your trash can on the other side of the room. He missed, though, so he conjured up another one and shot that, this time making it into the bin.

“WOOO~!!!” Chase jumped with joy, spinning back around to face you with a childlike grin. “Did ya see that?? I made the shot!!”

“…..is that really your method of seduction?”

His smile faltered. “U-Uh…yeah, pretty much…look. I’m whatcha call a “lower tier” Incubus. See?”

He removed his hat, revealing to you the pair of small, nubby black horns that were almost hidden in his messy, fluffy grass-green hair. “The bigger the horns, the stronger our seductive powers and lust…..meaning I’m kinda…..very weak in those categories.”

“I’ve read about that,” you nodded in understanding. “So..you wanna just hang out and I can tell you about myself?”

Chase looked at you, surprised. “Really? But I…um..thought you summoned me..to uh…y’know….” A slight blush rose to his cheeks.

“Well I mean…I just picked a random demon to summon since I’ve never done anything like that before. Besides you..don’t seem comfortable with doing that.” You gave him a gentle smile. “And I understand since we only met not even a minute ago.”

“B-But..” He stammered. “I mean..I’m a-an Incubus. That’s my..m-my purpose. I-I have to…I…I need to-”

“Hey.” You took his hand into yours, giving it a squeeze of reassurance. “It’s okay, Chase. You don’t have to force yourself upon me or anything like that. I don’t mind if you wanna wait until later when we know each other better. We can always just…cuddle if you want at least some kind of intimacy going on.”

After giving it some thought, the Incubus sighed in relief, relaxing his shoulders. “A-Alright. Thanks, [y/n]...I...appreciate it.” He smiled at you.

“Of course. Consent is always key as they say.” ………

Over the course of a month, Chase pretty much became your demonic roommate. You had erased the pentagram you drew on the floor when it became apparent that he had quickly grown attached to you.

No, you two didn’t engage in any sexual activities whatsoever. Instead you simply told him about your life as a magician and how you branched off into other forms of magic besides silly card tricks.

And he was there to….simply fill that lonely space you’ve had in your heart for quite some time. You were always cooped up in your house studying spells that you’ve lost touch with many of your friends.

But with Chase being there for you…you did feel a lot better.

Cuddling became an all-too common activity for you both. At first it was awkward, considering that he refused to change his outfit or put on something less…revealing, so you were basically hugging an almost completely naked guy.

Thankfully, though, he was okay with a blanket being over him.

Whenever you two were laying down, he liked to curl up and bury his face into your chest for the most part. But he was an Incubus, so you weren’t too surprised that he wanted to use cuddles as an excuse to get close to your breasts.

He would still try to “seduce” you with more of his silly trickshots, even though they just made you laugh more than anything.

Oddly enough, despite it being an entire month and the moments of intimacy you two shared, his horns barely grew an inch and he never really lusted after you.

There were hugs, cuddles, and kisses, but never….anything beyond that.

You were okay with that, and you never tried to force him into doing anything he didn’t want to just so you could be pleasured.

You were more than happy with the sort of relationship you maintained with the Incubus, and it seemed that he was, too. ……..

“Chase? Honey? I have a really cool spell I wanna show you~!” You grinned giddily as you made your way to your room, spellbook in hand.

Although when you reached the door, you noticed that it was closed, which was strange considering you had it open before.

But then…you could hear soft whimpers and sobs on the other side.

“Chase?” You opened the door to see the Incubus on your bed, curled up in the very corner and hidden underneath a blanket. His tail was the only part of him sticking out.

Worried, you walked in and climbed onto the bed beside him, wondering what got him so upset. “What’s wrong?” You removed the blanket, only to find him with his face buried into his knees.

After a few moments of crying, he stopped and looked at you, his once vibrant blue eyes now dark and rimmed with tears.

“M-Me..”

You blinked in confusion, shifting closer and wrapping your arms around him. “Honey..” Your eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean by-?”

“I’m…wrong [y/n]. I’ve…I-I feel like a-a disappointment….br-broken..…bu-but I don’t…I didn’t....w-wanna…” It was obvious he was having a hard time speaking, so you hushed him and held him close.

“Shhh, don’t keep it in. Just cry it all out.” You coaxed as you removed his hat and stroked his head. And he did just that as he shoved his face into your warm chest, sobbing uncontrollably as he wrapped his arms tightly around your waist.

With a soft sigh you ran your gloved fingers through his hair, your hand glowing with a pink, calming aura. It was something that automatically activated whenever you were close to someone feeling distressed. You gently kissed his horns as well.

After about a minute, the magic did its work and Chase calmed down, his sobs ceasing as he sat up slowly. “Th-Thank you...sorry a-about the stain..“ He mumbled, glancing down at you shirt.

“It’s fine.” You waved it off, the pink glow vanishing. ”I-”

But you were cut off when he then grabbed the end of your cape, bringing it up to his face to dry his tears and blow his nose into it.

‘Eww..’ You grimaced slightly. ‘And I just washed this, too..’ But you shook away those thoughts, knowing that whatever reason he was crying was more important than snot on your cape.

“So what do you mean you’re “wrong”, Chase?“ You cupped his cheek, wiping away any stray tears. "Is it because we haven’t...made love yet?”

“N-No..it’s… m-more than that..” He sniffled, placing his hand over yours and nuzzling your palm. “Honestly I...I-I was never fond of being summoned just for sex.”

You blinked in surprise, before you came to the realization as to why he said he was “wrong” and “broken”.

Because he was not like other Incubi.

“I know I was created to..lust after humans and nothing more,” he continued. “But I....I wanted to know what it was like to actually love one for their..personality and not just their body. I wanted to just do things like cuddle, and talk about life, and eat snacks, and watch movies like...normal human couples.”

A tiny smile grew on your features as he spoke those words. You almost forgot that this was a demon from down below and not an angel sent from above.

“And you got to experience that, didn’t you?” You asked softly.

“Y-Yeah,” Chase nodded slowly. “But...o-others who have summoned me simply....sent me back when they realized I-I didn’t want to...f-fulfill their desires right then and there.” His eyes filled up with tears. “And my mother...w-would be waiting for me...so disappointed..and my brothers w-would laugh at me. I-I keep promising them I’ll do it....but-”

“I won’t send you back.”

He gave you a double-take, eyes widening. “What...?”

“It’s obvious that you’ve been a lot happier here,” you elaborated. “So I don’t see any reason why you should go back. Besides I’ve already erased the pentagram if you hadn’t noticed. And it was incredibly hard to draw out...so I don't plan on doing that again anytime soon”

For a few moments, he stared at you, shocked. And then his face lit up with a smile as he hugged you tight. “Th-Thank you so, so much, [y/n]...I..I-I love you..” He kissed your shoulder. “I love you so damn m-much.”

“I love you, too, Chase.” You returned the hug. “But just remember, those things you said don’t make you any less of an Incubus. You’re not “broken” or anything like that, you’re simply friendlier and sweeter than most Incubi. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that, understand?”

Chase nodded, nuzzling your neck and kissing it a few times, his scruff tickling your skin. “I-I understand..I’ll stay with you....on one condition.”

“And what’s that?”

“That I show you more of my latest trickshots. I think I’m getting better at ‘em.”

“....alright. But, I also have one condition you must agree with.”

“What would that be, babe?”

“We gotta get you out of that stripper outfit so I stop having nosebleeds every other day.”

“.....fair enough.”

[ca-3]

For the honesty hour thing: So, how did you fall in love with Sakuya, and want attracts you to his character? Im interested in this!

Lol girl did I ever tell you that I love you?

It took me awhile to answer this because I needed to collect my thoughts about it. AHAHA TAKE A SEAT EVERYONE. Okay gosh where to begin….. THIS IS LIKE THE INTERVIEW I WAS WAITING FOR. HA.

Well, as some people know I wasn’t extremely fond of Sakuya when I first started Servamp about….7-8 months ago? I didn’t hate him or anything, just didn’t really care for him at first. (but that kinda goes for quite a bit of characters really, but everyone grows on me at some point. ^^)

I think what really got to me was after learning about his past and how it affected his motives, relationships and current situation in the series.

So many aspects about his characters just make so much sense but I feel like are just kinda looked over……. probably cause his backstory was kinda glazed over real quick, in my opinion at least. (Like why dammit? I have so many questions still, this series can’t do this to me.) It just really kills me inside, especially the more I thought about it and the more I think about his character.

I’m gonna kinda express some of my new random thoughts on his past , cause this intrigues me oddly: (Kinda theory time right now whoooo) AND ALL IS WHAT GIVE ME SO MANY FEELINGS MY GOSH.

Just thinking about the extent of the abuse he must’ve suffered is something that really boggles my mind…… We know it went on for years, those 6 years before his “death” and then probably a few more before that obviously, when his sister was still alive. Who’s knows how long she had to endure it though? She was much older, Sakuya was about 9 at the time, and she appeared to be High School (or maybe Middle School can’t really tell with the uniform.) 

She was also the one covered in bandages after all, and we couldn’t see any visible scars or injuries on Sakuya. So she obviously took all the beatings so he wouldn’t have too most likely but after when she died I’m sure things got worse for poor little Sakuya.

But this is my other biggest thing about the abuse he went through…

How come he never tried running away?

We all know his parents threatened to do the same thing to him as they did to his older sister, but could he really not just try and leave before anything happened? Maybe not until he got a bit older.. but still….

Was his parents that controlling? I doubt his parents even cared enough to hunt him down if he did run away…. So why didn’t he try? Did they really keep him that locked in? Its so hard for me to imagine him being and feeling that hopeless, did he have zero fight inside him?

It’s hard to imagine him not fighting back in the slightest. But he could have been a very different person back when he was human too, of course. Maybe more meek and submissive… again who knows. (To be honest, I am extremely curious about to what most of the vampires characters were like before they were vampires and who and what they did before as well.

But anyway, do you think Sakuya put up with it…

Because it was ALSO a loyalty thing??!? I’m making no jokes here. Hear me out, even if he hated his parents(I’m sure he did obviously, even though he never explicitly said he did, because we had Tsubaki tell his story, and not Sakuya.)

Do you think he never tried running away or whatever, because he just felt like he just couldn’t? Like he was betraying something? Maybe not his parents, just because “They are my parents…. whether I like it or not. I have to listen to them…”

But maybe because of his sisters death? Like he felt like he had to endure it like she did for him?? I mean…. he was told:

“You don’t want your sister’s death to be a waste, right?”

YOU GUYS GET WHAT I AM SAYING HERE RIGHT? History can repeat itself….

(This boy is gonna kill me with his conflicted ass)

Maybe there wasn’t actually much physical abuse doing those years… Maybe at least for as long as he did what they said and stayed out of their way and kept their secret. But I kinda already talked about this part in a post about what I think happened to his parents after he became a vampire. (I am very sensitive about this topic alright?)

We know they killed his sister so they could get insurance money(ughh so sickening) but did they really try to kill Sakuya for more money? They would only be two people at that point…… so that’s why a part of me is like, “there’s gotta be a greater reason.” The best conclusion I came up with was “They killed him because maybe he tried to TELL someone.”

Think about it. Sakuya hates lies, he had to lie his whole life basically. He takes it very serious and to heart. WE KNOW THIS.

We know he only kept it a secret because he was threatened and didn’t want his sister’s death to be in vain…. But maybe he eventually cracked under all the pressure… And maybe tried speaking about it or was planning too and then… That was also the day he died…… Damn…. I just stabbed myself in the heart.

So yes, his past is a big factor on why I found him so interesting initially when I was new to this fandom/series, I was really hoping we would see his past elaborated a bit or learn more and see what he does and how on earth Mahiru was gonna “save him.”

I could go on and on about these two as well. Not in a shippy way…. but friendship or romantic, considering his past it makes sense to why he’s attached to Mahiru. Again in another post where I “defended his character” I guess you could say, I talked about how Sakuya’s “screwed up friendship methods” and how he really dug himself into a hole. -__- But I was saying its almost hard to blame him for going about the way he did. BECAUSE IT JUST MAKES SENSE SADLY.

Sakuya is a real lonely and distant kinda guy. After he sister died I’m sure he didn’t have much light in his life then. No one to talk too, no one who understood. No one who loved him. I’m sure growing up during those 6 years he was probably afraid to get close to anyone. What was school like for him then…. did he really have no friends at all for 6 years? It’s crazy to think about right? His childhood was anything but normal…. 

But then he received a “second chance” after Tsubaki found him and I’m sure Mahiru’s kind-hearted nature really drew him in, it’s not wrong for him to really want a friend, yeah he did go the complete wrong way about it, but unfortunately lies and deceit is all he knew how to do. He found some light in his life, and he was willing to do anything to hold on to that for as long as he could. Also HE KILLS ME because he regretted lying to Mahiru so much and did all the awful things he did/said, BECAUSE HE WAS HOPING MAHIRU WOULD HATE HIM and have his Servamp KILL HIM because he felt that was the only way to apologize for everything. and BOIII did that really kill me. AND THEN MAHIRU FORGAVE HIM STILL and now look at where he is with his conflicted loyalty….

YOU SEE WHERE I AM COMING FROM AVI!?!? AHHHH.

-inhales- ALSO ONE THING I NEED TO GET OFF MY CHEST BECAUSE THIS REALLY BOTHERS ME. Before ANYONE says “Mahiru is too forgiving about the whole fake memories thing and shouldn’t have forgiven Sakuya or be his friend.” Cause I HAVE heard someone say this and it makes me angry.

BECAUSE then you are ALSO SAYING:

Mahiru shouldn’t have forgiven and accepted Kuro for his past and all his sins and regrets, that he never shared with him. Also for attacking Mahiru that one time, lets not forget.

Mahiru shouldn’t be friends or ever trust Lawless because he’s killed so many eves and killed all of Tsubaki’s subclass and who knows what else he’s done?

Mahiru shouldn’t be finding a way to stop Tsubaki without killing him, because he’s not worth it.

Mahiru shouldn’t be trying to save Tsurugi either because he’s also done bad things.

AND SO ON.

SO SCREW EVERYONE WHO SAYS THAT. Cause you’re basically saying NO CHARACTER deserves happiness. -exhales- Sorry I just feel very strongly about that and I forgot to mention this in my defense post awhile ago. I feel better now~

So about Sakuya’s damn conflicted loyalty between Tsubaki and Mahiru. How are things gonna go from here?.WHICH ROUTE MY GUY? I WANT TO KNOW.

Tbh he’s kinda similar to Tsurugi in a sense (a certain someone kinda opened my eyes about that) that the whole “afraid to start something new because this is all that I’ve ever known and honestly I don’t know how to feel anymore?” kinda sense.

Although Tsurugi is debatablely the saddest character in servamp right now (backstory and current situation and all ARE WAYYY more painful.) 

What? Just cause Sakuya is my fave didn’t mean I’m completely biased about him. He sad. But not the SADDEST. I just thought I would mention this cause the parallels kinda fascinate me.

I WANT SAKUYA TO TAKE SOME ACTION. HE’S FREE NOW RIGHT??? What’s he gonna do now??? What’s he planning to do!?!? STILL WAITING HERE.

. Ughh its probably gonna be awhile until we get anything about Sakuya again. Which is fine. Cause its not his arc right now.

 WE GOT BIGGER PROBLEMS IN THE MANGA. MUCH MORE PRESSING THINGS INDEED.

But still I’m extremely curious… To what he might do in the future…. I mean Sakuya and even Lilac are still running around freely unlike the other melancholy members at the moment? So will he somehow be involved with that later??? Will he find Tsubaki??? WHERE ARE YOU MY BOY?

Ughh I’m having Sakuya withdraw lol… I hope he gets to do something exciting or important soon…. Tanaka strike is TEASING ME by putting him in so many recent official arts but then NOT IN THE ACTUAL STORY. WHYYYY. (well we do see Sakuya in a recent bonus chapter so….)

I HOPE THAT MEANS STRIKE PLANS TO INCLUDE HIM AGAIN SOON. I’ll take it as foreshadowing *sobs* Strike obviously hasn’t forgotten about him….so JUST waiting and watching now.

Waiting and watching….

Sorry, that got so angsty above I wanted this post to be positive too.. So here are good/fun things I like about him:

Even though he character design absolutely baffles me(yes I mean the hair) I gotta say I really love it~ His hair is really something original that’s for sure. HA. His design also helped immediately catch my attention to him also I may have a bit of a “stripes bias” ahaha I own A LOT of stripe shirts myself lol always have and always will.

He owns a lot of pink accessories and wears pink a lot too! LET. BOYS. WEAR. PINK. YES. YOU. GO. MY. BOY.  He rocks it fight me.

He’s cool and I’m kinda curious on what his subclass ability is. If there is even one for him. Weapons seem to be his specialty. (F.E knives, chainsaw(which I am still trying to figure out how magically pulled out in AN ELEVATOR!?! And can make a sword outta blood apparently.

 But I don’t really trust the animes canon….) Also his little black strap things have a function??? THEY ARE ALIVE. WHAT

Look how happy Mahiru makes him. His smile is precious. He loves his friend so much I cry. I want them to be together and be friends again.

All the Tsubaki and Sakuya shenanigans make me laugh. One minute he’s crying to Mahiru “please don’t kill him” and the next you’re trying to put the guy into a fox trap. What even boi.

WANTS TO BE CALLED SAKKUN HOW CUTE IS THAT.

Has the best “yandere” expressions.

HE PRETTY STRONG and has great potential to be truly terrifying and useful. UNLEASH THAT POTENTIAL YOU GREEN EMO CHILD.

Another random thought I had was what would have things been like if Mahiru did choose to tell Sakuya about Kuro in the beginning like he originally planned? Might’ve still gone down the same way. But who knows?

(I could keep going tbh)

But for now I’m just gonna sweat about the BIGGER MATTERS THAT ARE CURRENTLY HAPPENING IN THE MANGA RIGHT NOW. HA….

Thank you for asking Aviiiii~

[tarotlesbean-blog]

today i set a theme for the month of may. i’ve been thinking about it for awhile and meditating and today i did a monthly tarot reading which turned out to be interesting. i used my quantum tarot cards which i’ve been very drawn to lately. i’ve done dozens of readings with these cards but never drawn the two extra cards of the deck, the phoenix and the universe--until now! 

i forgot where i got this spread from but i thought it would be useful for the coming month. may’s theme will be me and my personal development, especially when it comes to relationships (which i’ve found to be very dysfunctional in the past few years, resulting in me feeling anxious and withdrawing from everybody). 

so here’s the reading. (behind a cut because of length)

1. what answer is right in front of me? (top left)

the phoenix. what does this card represent to me? rising from the ashes, shedding your skin, starting anew, rebirth. the quantum tarot deck comes with two extra cards, one of which is the mythological phoenix, a bird that rises from the ashes of it’s predecessor. as i’m not used to this card, i had to do a little bit of reading and reflecting, but even before that the card conjured up an image of rebirth and starting anew in a beautiful, fiery way. don’t be afraid of new beginnings. don’t be afraid of the ugliness and discomfort that growth brings because the end result will be something breath-taking. according to wikipedia, the phoenix is associated with the sun and the sun just happens to be my favourite tarot card. i do feel a strong connection to that card but my personal interpretation is that the phoenix is a destructive force--and destruction is sometimes needed for growth--while the sun’s energy is more harmonious and life-sustaining. 

the phoenix reminds me of one of my favourite quotes:

“nature grows through breaking things down, through cracking things open, through opening up, spilling out, and then blossoming. growth can feel like a destructive process. that’s because it is. you have to crack open your old self for new aspects to bloom.” 

- emily maroutian

according to the booklet that came with the deck the phoenix represents “[recommencing] the journey through the major arcana with the all the innocence and openness of the fool, but this time round we carry the memory of everything we have already learned.” 

“what has been reborn in you?” it asks.

2. how do i cultivate hidden truths? (top centre)

the star (xvii). the universal consciousness, healing, meditation, spiritual awakening, creative inspiration, the chakra system.. such a beautiful card. i consider it a card of healing energies, basically. i personally find meditation to be extremely healing and balancing and i feel like the card is advising me to continue with that habit. the star is connected with universal energies, the pool which all things draw from, and i strongly feel that energy in nature, so i probably should spend more time in nature as well. i think should meditate and reflect on things that are healing to me to best utilise the star’s advise, and focus less on material reality because to me the star is about the higher mind (even though i find meditation to be extremely grounding.. or rather a practice that harmonises the material and the spiritual). 

3. what limiting belief must i release? (top right)

the universe. yet another extra card of the deck, marked with the infinity symbol <3 i had to acquaintance myself with this card too as it’s completely new to me but the booklet that came with the deck describes the universe as “a higher vibration of the world” and it “asks us to expand our awareness still further”.

“it requires a paradigm shift in our thinking, a realisation that the reality we perceive is but a tiny component of all that is.”

“can you exist in a world without limits?”, it asks.

i’m finding hard to find words to describe how i feel about this card in this position. it feels extremely powerful. like something that i cannot grasp quite yet, but it is obviously asking me to think about the existence of limits to begin with.

4. am i willing to change? (centre left)

ace of cups. aces--beginning of a journey, the first spark of potential that hasn’t materialised yet. cups--emotions, spirituality. the spirit, the subconscious mind. there’s definitely potential for (emotional and spiritual) change but i have to make use of that creative energy that flows from the spirit. change won’t happen on it’s own. i have to do the work myself and it’s up to me to take that first step.

5. what would i embrace if i allowed myself to? (centre right)

the world (xxi). the end of the journey, involution and evolution, the superconscious--the final stage of the cosmic consciousness. on a material level i’m interpreting this card as a sign that it is okay to let go and move on to new things. it’s okay to admit that it’s the end of this certain journey i’ve been on and to embrace endings and new beginnings. i moved back to my home town (of my teenage years and early twenties) four years ago because i missed back, i missed my friends, and i felt like i had unfinished business here. now, while i love it here and it feels very much like home and appreciate a lot things here, i do yearn for new experiences--whether that means new experiences physically (like moving to a new location or something along those lines) or mentally/spiritually remains to be seen. i can let go and embrace new things that come my way. however, i do feel like there is a spiritual aspect to this card as well.. but that is something that i should meditate on to gain better clarity. 

6. can i look at myself and see what the universe sees? (bottom left)

three of cups. threes--growth, creativity, abundance. cups--emotions, spirituality. friends, teamwork, socialising, synergy between like-minded people. hmm, this is an interesting card. i’ve been worrying a lot about being all alone in the world while everybody else is connecting with each other, becoming friends, dating, getting married and all that.. some of which is not my thing (like dating + marriage, though i’m not “opposed” to love of course, ..plus i really struggle with friendship) but i worry about being the only one of my kind (on several levels of being). while i’m not lonely, i do sometimes wish i had people i could talk to and connect with (on a deeper level, more spiritually, more intellectually). three of cups is a positive card so i guess the universe sees me in synergy with like-minded people even though i’m not seeing that right now?

7. what possibility exists that i can’t possibly imagine or comprehend at the moment? (bottom right)

the lovers (vi). powerful attraction, the cooperation between the conscious and the subconscious, harmony, duality. i guess this card is traditionally read as, well, lovers, but i always see it as powerful force of attraction of some sort. a card of manifesting. it also represents profound harmony between two parts. i have to meditate on this card but there’s clearly a theme in this whole reading--healing, rebirth, new beginnings--and i guess the lovers is telling me that harmony is possible, and that powerful attraction is doing it’s work--ask and it is given.

+ i also drew two extra cards, as i often do, one from the top of the deck, representing the conscious mind, and the one from the bottom of the deck, representing the subconscious. 

my conscious mind, represented by the devil (xv), seems to be well aware of the stuckness and the bondage that i feel i am in right now. the devil is an interesting card because it can represent physical bondage such as addiction or financial limitations, but often it refers to the mental prison created by your own mind which you then enact in the material world, making excuses for yourself and staying stuck in situations where you could walk away from if you just took the initiative. the devil tells you are stuck but that feeling is often self-imposed. 

the subconscious, represented by the moon (xviii).. the word that first comes to my mind when i draw this card is fear. fear is a useful emotion in an evolutionary sense, it is there to protect you. however, it can play tricks on you and even keep you from doing things that are good for you. the moon is also linked to dreams and visions, which may mean that your fears are unfounded, not based on reality. the moon represents the mysterious and the unknown but it reminds you not to be bound by your fear, though a healthy dose of it is probably good for you.

the past few months i’ve been feeling like i’m stepping into a new way of being, starting on a completely new journey, though fearing it at the same time and feeling somewhat stuck in my current situation, so this reading feels pretty accurate and offers great insights. also, last month’s reading and this reading now were filled with major arcana cards so there’s a lot of potential and great opportunities for deeper growth. lots of powerful cards here guiding me on my journey.. i’m extremely appreciative and grateful <3

i have to study the cards and their synergies more but this is a pretty good start for may! can’t wait to see where the month leads me.

// ETA

i was examining the synergies between the cards and i think it’s interesting how the star (healing) crowns the ace of cups (beginnings) and the world (endings) and the two cards connect to three of cups (which is basically something that i really want: synergies between like-minded individuals). i’ve always considered the threes as foundational cards, like laying the bricks, because they are first cards after the harmonious and balanced twos. so there’s healing to be done with both beginnings and endings before the three of cups.

also, there’s a line connecting the phoenix (rebirth) and the ace of cups (beginnings) to the three of cups, and a line connecting the universe (the super charged world basically) and the world to the three of cups. so the left side is beginnings and the right side is endings. 

the line of cards at the top is the phoenix (rebirth), the star (healing) and the universe (a higher vibration of the world card). work to be done on a higher level of being.

the second line is the ace of cups and the world. manifestations in the more material realm. both require a human conduit to do/have done their work.

the third line is the three of cups, highlighted by the lovers as if it’s saying yes to all the harmony and attraction in this reading?

[lovestructionworld]

“Ashes to Beauty...Literally LFM #33 June 14, 2017

“ASHES TO BEAUTY...LITERALLY”

When I was four years old my father left my mother and our home. From that time on, until he died, he lived four hundred plus miles away in South Bend, Indiana.

I absolutely adored my father. He would visit every three months. When he would come, it would be all I could think about for the week prior to his arrival. And as soon as he walked through the door, I struggled having fun with him, because I so dreaded Sunday evening, which was his regular departure time. As he was leaving, I would beg him to stay and then be racked with depression once he was gone. The pain of it was torture.

When in town visiting, my Dad would stay with my mom and me. I would sleep with him just to be as close as possible. In the mornings, I would sit on the edge of the tub to watch him shave and comb his hair. He would tickle me all the time and was very affectionate, always hugging and kissing my cheeks. I always felt safe when He visited. I was a true Daddy's Boy.

By the time I was a teenager, my father's issues became more and more apparent and my tears dammed up as I learned to block the pain of his leaving. I can remember starting to enjoy my friends and really not wanting to be around him.

Passively sowing judgment in my heart toward my Dad and his flaws became the norm. I reaped a harvest of trouble from this judgment of him, even though he "seemingly" had the more apparent issues.

When I became an adult, he wanted me to visit him to go fishing, but I always found a reason for not making the four hundred mile drive. Even though I was a Christian, I figured he wasn't good to me, so why should I be good to him, completely immaturely bypassing "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Little about me was golden with so much pain.

When my Dad passed away over 15 years ago in South Bend, Indiana, I barely shed a tear. Matter of fact, I know it sounds terrible, but I was relieved. Ouch! It’s true! I took the trip up to attend to his body. He had wanted to be cremated, and the Funeral Director said it was illegal for me to transport his ashes across state lines. They had to send them to me via U.S. Mail. And when his ashes arrived at the Franklin, Tennessee Post Office, it was like I was picking up a used car part off of a wreck at a junk yard. I had zero emotion. I even saw a friend at the Post Office and made a joke about my Dad's ashes to his horror.

My Dad's ashes stayed in my utility vehicle for over 30 days. I forgot that they were in the back until a friend asked me where I had scattered his ashes. He rebuked me strongly, when he found out the ashes were still in my vehicle. I laughed at Bob that day.

So, I made a quick plan to spread his ashes over some body of water on my way to Murfreesboro, Tennessee for a business meeting. I didn't care which one...lake, pond, puddle, whatever. It was what he wanted, but a pain to me. And I knew I was wearing a suit to a business meeting that day, making it convenient for me to gitter done, funeral style.

I found a small public lake and removed the box from my car. It was an extremely windy day, which was a little scary with me scattering ashes. The wind was straight-line wind blowing out of the north (a sign) in one direction making an easier aim of it, which was good.

As I walked out to the edge of the water, a thought (Holy Spirit's Voice) occurred to me to ask God for my Dad's anointings. I wasn't real sure what anointings were at the time. I had heard of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob each giving their sons their blessings. But what I heard was "anointings". So, I held the box of ashes, maybe with a little tear in my eye, and said a prayer to God on behalf of my Dad. Arrogantly, I thanked God for the "little" bit my Dad had and I might get...anointing wise.

I had angled myself in such a way that his ashes would easily fly out across the water away from me. I drew the box back as one would draw back a Frisbee to fling and then I fffllluung his ashes up into the air.

Now two days prior, I had bought a brand new pair of $175, black, Johnson and Murphy, cap-toed shoes. I was so proud of those shoes and the first scuffs on the bottom of the soles happened that day. As soon as I sent my Dad's ashes flying, the wind made a strong and abrupt change of direction sending the ashes directly down and backwards. You guessed it. My new pair of Johnson and Murphy’s were covered in the grayish white ash of my Dad. My suit was relatively free of ash, but my shoes looked as though I had been walking in snow. So much ash had fallen on my shoes, that small bone fragments were even inside and along the crevices making my walking prickly.

My immediate reaction was panic and to throw out multiple expletives, because I was so grossed out! Sadly, I was crying more about my brand new shoe condition and the hideously disgusting moment I was in, than the loss of my Dad. I bounced around kangaroo-like and in panic for several minutes as I attempted to bang the ash off of my shoes not wanting to risk his ashes getting on my hands. I finally gave up. My shoes were so dusty and there was no way to clean them except with a faucet and paper towels. The moment was absolutely surreal!

I dejectedly started walking back to my Ford Explorer and suddenly the Holy Spirit strongly spoke to me within my spirit and said, "I've given you your father's anointings". There was a pause, only for a few seconds, and then the dam of my pain broke. I stopped and began crying harder than I had ever cried up until that point in my life. The deep wailing went on and on for several minutes. But little by little, I was realizing the magnitude of what the Holy Spirit had just done for me. My tears that had been from pain were now flowing from joy. The Holy Spirit began speaking to me, that what I had experienced was an event generated out of heaven for me and from Him. My shoes weren’t the real target. God had blown his breath into the ashiest part of me, my wounded soul, and began a process of beautification (healing and deliverance) in me toward my that day.

As I reached the car, the Holy Spirit also began impressing up me that no man's life is a complete waste and that even though my Dad had extreme issues, he was still valuable to God and had been gifted by Him. While sitting in my car, I remembered that my Dad's passions were as a writer and speaker. He constantly wrote about everything for which he cared, and his monster, home made desk was covered with yellow legal pads inked with his ideas. He loved to speak and prepared for his great moment by attending Toastmasters speaking club meetings for years. He always dreamed of changing society with pen to paper and great speeches. Presidents Nixon, Carter, Reagan and Bush Sr. all had an opportunity at reading my Dad's mail because he would boldly send his thoughts directly to the White House. I'm surprised the Secret Service didn't pick him up for questioning. Ha!

I got tired of hearing my Dad talk about all "that stuff" when he was alive. On this windy day, all I knew was, I had my Dad's anointing and it felt good to me. I could feel my faith for this "anointing" welling up inside of my heart.

The Holy Spirit had miraculously filled in the huge fatherly quality and quantity time gaps with His power. What should have passed down to me day by day from my Dad, but didn't, had made the leap across my anger and time disconnects associated with my Dad.

What solidified the miracle were my past feelings about "creative writing", "grammar" and "public speaking', given that my high school and collegiate experience was filled with literal dread of them. But, I had been given a surety of this newly given anointing.

Takeaways

There are some takeaways of this story that will be beneficial to you, if you find yourself in the same condition as I used to be. You see, I use to dread Father's Day too. But now, I look forward to them, because my soul is healed from my precious father's wounds.

Know this about my Dad. Physical abuse by my Grandfather became too much for him. And at 16 years old my Dad ran away from home having put my abusive Grandfather in the hospital for several days. This event stunted my poor Dad for 57 more years until his death. My Dad was a son meant to do great things, but his wounds, generational sins and judgement toward his Dad locked him down into habitual, barely bridled anger that was explosive. His father's sin passed down to him. Scripture says, God "visits the iniquity of fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation". This means sin isn't just haphazard. The enemy meticulously plans it and if the non-repentance door stays open, the devil and his dark forces can attack you and your children until someone repents and says, "the buck stops right here".

You will find revival in the following words. When I originally wrote them, I felt as though I was flying through the clouds with Jesus holding my hand on one side and The Father holding my hand on the other.

No matter what kind of Dad you've had, honor him for whatever good attribute you can find. Instead of being bitter at your father and his issues, repent by finding something positive. Embrace it, even if it is just one thing.

Never stop taking care of you father, no matter how poor of a Dad he's been. Give to your Dad even when he hasn't given to you. This will help stop the sowing and reaping cycle of judgment ("visiting sin") that might be keeping the spirit of misery empowered within your family. To do this you must allow the Holy Spirit to restore your heart to your Dad as written in Malachi 4:6.

Also, be, for your children, who you would have wanted as a child. If you have recurring issues affecting your children negatively, do something about it. Get some inner healing. Rejoin a church. Make solid men friends at church who know how to raise children and ask to be mentored by them. Humble yourself. Start pursuing God more deeply and your kids will start drafting off of your pursuit.

Repent to your wife and children for your past failings as a husband and father...all of them! If you are so blinded that you can't see your issues, ask the Holy Spirit to show them to you and trust me, He will be faithful to make them clear. Just know that if the blindness moves into "denial", the destruction of your family is imminent unless you make the right move.

Change!...for the good. "Set your face like flint" to reach your spiritual destiny here on this earth for you and your children's sake. Be a true patriarch, unshakable, strong, a wing of protection and shade under which your children can be at rest and peace no matter how hard marriage or life gets, like our God is to us. True fathers never, ever, never, ever give up, disconnect or run from the pain that can be associated with "family". And when you fail…forgive yourself and let Jesus wash you in His blood.

All of what I've just said is achievable only by the breaking of one's self-will and the bending of both knees to the Trinity...God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit...the perfect relationship. Just because you are a Christian doesn't mean this has happened.

Today, I still have the shoes (See Below). They've been resoled at least six or seven times and I'll NEVER throw them away. They'll always be covered with the memories and anointings of my Fathers.

I really do miss my Dad. The loving feelings I had for him as a child have fully been given back to me, through healing and deliverance. I wish Dad was still here. I would show him off to all my friends if he were still in his earth-suit, and I'd drive the 400 miles to take him to some fishin' hole on the water he loved so much.

[tammiehuxley2-blog]

abby winters intimate moments - How To Gain Abby Winters Download

When I was a freshman years ago, I met Him. He had an strong Type-A personality back then, so I could only tolerate him in small amounts. I was webcamming over AIM with my girlfriend at the time, when my message "you’re so fucking hot/take your pants off and turn around for me" was directed to his address instead of hers.

That’s because I sexted him by accident. We’d met in his residence hall (arts floor) through our mutual friend. From that point on, there was an understood trust between us. He replied to me "you need to warm me up a little more, sexy" minutes later, after I realized what I had done.

For whatever reason, we were able to find a common ground. Over the course of a year or more, we’d gotten to know each other pretty well. I was flattered, but I was also excited. It was a leap of faith for him, since he hadn’t told anyone on campus. At that time I was still in denial of my bisexuality, so his admission stirred something deep in me. I apologized profusely in response, and he just laughed it off.

I started jerking off to the thought of him when I showered. It was clear from his looks abby winters abbie winters limo at me that he was interested. I told him I wanted to see him naked. Later that year, our bonds were forged. Not a abby winters clips minute later, I get abby winters porn winters girl an email with "nsfw. I wanted nothing more at that moment than to kneel in front of him with his firm dick in my mouth.

In the summer about another year later, we were gchatting when I finally had the nerve to make a pass at him. I learned about his family, his hobbies, and eventually, his sexuality. He was standing in the shower with water dripping off his erect cock.

"You should fly up here so we can play. He transferred out of state a few months later, before anything else was said. Still, I couldn’t decide what I was more bothered about: the mistake that I made, or the fact that his reply turned my cock rock hard. I immediately stripped, set my camera up on a tripod, and posed on my bed, stiff cock in hand.

I purchased it, quickly, and forwarded him my itinerary. There was a flight in three weeks I could afford. " My body was so tense I had no choice but to close my laptop and jerk off right onto my chest. He sent me another message once he received my photo. Three weeks later… I arrived in his city, waiting for a lift at the airport.

As cliche as it sounds, I found it very sexy. He picked me up in his dad’s BMW. It had plenty of bedrooms, a home theatre, and a tiled jacuzzi right outside. The air was electric and I found it difficult to breathe. His parents’ house was particularly nice. Everyone in his family was out of town for the week. I told him I forgot to pack a bathing suit (on purpose).

After a quick dinner out and unpacking in my room, it was already nightfall. I told him we could just go in naked, in a shaky voice. He asked me if I’d like to take a dip in the jacuzzi. He said "fair enough," and we went upstairs to get ready.

He said I could borrow a pair from him. I stripped down in my room and put on a towel, though I had to calm myself down for a few minutes on account of the tent I was pitching. We chitchatted on the way to his parents’ house, awkwardly. The only source of light was the kitchen window, so it was fairly dark and well-secluded. I looked at my calendar, and then my bank account.

When I got downstairs, he had just finished setting up the jacuzzi. He went first, removing his towel and sliding into the jacuzzi water smoothly. I followed him next, taking just a bit longer to see if I could get him to look. We both put our beers down and walked around to the steps. When I got home that night, my boxer briefs were moist from the damp spot my precum had made.

It was too dark for me to know. He must have been paying attention, because it was the perfect temperature. I took a couple of big gulps right away. The beer made me feel even more willing. He was wrapped in a towel too, and handed me a beer as I approached.

I’m not usually a fan of jacuzzis; they’re too hot, and told him just as much. I could feel my muscles relaxing under the weight of the water, and I could feel my dick floating freely. Most of the time we kept our distance, but sometimes we would drift toward one another. In between sips of beer we bobbed up and down, shooting the shit and laughing.

I was so loose and relaxed from everything that my heartbeat startled me, once I realized he was stepping out of the jacuzzi to sit on the edge and dip his feet in. The water felt amazing. I must have looked ridiculous staring at him. We are both fairly short people, so the water came up just past our nipples.

I stole a glance, but immediately turned away and made my way up the steps as well. We’d get close, but one of us would float back a bit, and the chase would repeat. He was dripping as he came to the edge of the jacuzzi. I think he was pointing out gemini, which I didn’t recognize. We’d run out of things to talk about, and it became increasingly obvious what was about to happen.

He scooted next to me, so that our legs were touching, and pointed up. He pointed up at the sky, calling out various constellations. " He lowered his arm, turned my head, pulled me in with his hands and put abby winters clips his wet, soft lips against mine. There was a foot of space between us, and he took the lead.

It was my first kiss with a guy, and it was electrifying. Breathlessly, I asked, "So what do you want to do? Our beers were empty and we were still treading back and forth. In a moment, we were both completely naked, in the open air, on the edge. It was heavenly, exploring his body and tasting his mouth.

In a flash, I was compelled, driven, to break our kiss. He took the hint and found my cock as well. I was surprised by how large he felt in my mouth, considering he was average sized. It did not take long for me to find his stiff cock, touching it lightly before wrapping my fingers around it. He felt warm and smooth as I slowly drew my lips from as far as I could take him in.

His head was so slippery, and it was fun to flick my tongue against it. Our hands searched one another’s body as I could now feel my tongue swirling with his. Without a moment to spare I jumped down into the water, swam up between his legs, and took his wet, hard cock into my mouth.

I felt myself become instantly rock hard as I came to my senses and kissed right back. Just as I was getting into it he guided my head off his dick, and told me that we should go inside. He was starting to get a bit nervous, too. His parents’ bedroom had a nice marble shower with plenty of room for two.

I quickly rinsed off while the reality of the situation was coming into focus. I grabbed my towel, not bothering to wrap it around me, and followed him dripping through the house to the bathroom. We hopped in, and he turned on the water for us. We turned the water off, stepped out, and dried in silence. I leaned over, my face hovering near his, feeling his heat, and followed his finger up.

" I continued to dry my hair, now comfortable with our nudity, as he followed me into my room. He had his arms crossed, looking at me. This got me excited too as I stood up and approached him, locking lips and letting my hand drift down to his cock. " He grinned back at me and I could see his dick visibly engorge with blood and get hard, no hands required.

I sat down, pressing my legs together, making him say the words. Confidently this time, I grinned and asked "so what do you want to do? "Spread your legs," and I quickly complied. There was no need to close the door. He dropped down to his knees in front of me, pulled my cock toward him, and gently licked my cock from base to tip. Pretty soon we were gently jacking each other off while we made out, until he told me to sit back down.

I tossed my towel on the floor and sat in a leather chair next to the bed. And then he put my cock in his mouth. My question was simple: "my room? I could feel him moan with delight as he wet my dick with his tongue, slowly sucking back to the head before going down further.

He gave me instructions this time, so that I could suck him better, and I was pleased with the results. After a few minutes I wanted him in my mouth again, so we switched spots. I gave him some pointers as well, and I was taken my surprise when he managed to deepthroat me for just a second. This time I got to spend more time worshiping his cock, lubing it up with spit and jacking it off when my mouth got tired.

I put my hands on his head, feeling his short boyish haircut prickle my fingers. I wanted him to cum instead. We switched one more time so he could try his hand (and mouth) at it again. He jumped up off the floor and laid on the bed, legs spread eagle.

I crawled toward him from the end of the bed and took ahold of his stiff cock with my hand and lowered my mouth onto him. This time, I asked him to lay on the bed. This same boy was eagerly sucking my cock. He wanted it fast, and I was happy to provide. I jerked his cock vigorously with my hand, letting my spit drip down to lubricate further. As I bobbed up and down on his cock, feeling his hardness slide back forth against my tongue, I started to feel a little dizzy, but he was loving every second.

As tired as I was getting, I knew he was getting close, so I kept sucking, kept jerking, as strongly as I could. He looked down at me, pleasure painted on his face, as he put his hands on my head to guide my rhythm. I could feel his hips begin to shift, and his legs stiffen slightly.

I didn’t want that yet. He must have jerked off earlier that day, because he only had two ropes for me to swallow. It was clear to me that if I let him continue to suck my dick, he get me to cum right there in the chair.

I licked the tip of his head and could taste a salty-sweetness. I pulled him out and licked the tip to get any remaining drops of cum. He moaned as I could feel his whole groin shiver. His cock quivered as he exploded with cum in my mouth. Before I could say anything he was sitting up, telling me to lay down now. I swallowed his cum with his cock still in my mouth.

Sucking his cock had been so arousing for me that I stayed hard the entire time. From the way he squeezed my dick and licked the head, I could tell he was milking me for precum. It was much saltier than his precum, but I enjoyed it.

His cock turned to stone, and for a brief moment, I enjoyed the feeling of my lips slide up the length of his immeasurably hard shaft. But, I didn’t have much time to think before he had his mouth on my cock again, paying extra attention to the head.

I felt my balls retract further against my shaft as he once again took my cock into his mouth. I was relieved he was still interested in blowing, after just cumming. But it was all too exciting, and I started to feel myself tense up. He pulled me out briefly and gently sucked one of my balls into his mouth, rolling it around with his tongue. I’d never felt that before it was so intense.

I breather heavier, harder, as the orgasm slowly built up in my prostate. I tried to hold out for a while, I really did. He followed the same technique that I had used on him, jerking me off while bobbing up and down on my cock shaft. I whimpered as I shot rope after rope of cum into his mouth.

The image of him desperately blowing me will always be burned in my memory. I forced my head down to look at him, because I did not want to miss this moment. Once I was no longer cross-eyed, I focused on him again, pulling my dick out of his mouth and kissing it. I could see him struggle to keep it all in while he slowed down and jerked me off the rest of the way into his mouth.

I hadn’t jerked off that day. Panting, I told him I was going to cum. He had drained everything from me, and all I could do was hold my head and breathe. " "Okay, goodnight," I responded. I arched my back and shift my hips in as he sucked harder on me. "I think I’m gonna go to bed. My cock stiffened and swelled as I held it in as long as I could, until he forced a moan out of me and I exploded.

I wish hadn’t been less awkward, but in that moment I could not focus. He left me in the room sprawled naked on the bed, staring up while I felt oxytocin flood my body. I smiled and let my head fall onto the bed, looking up at the ceiling, looking at stars once more.

He smiled down at me, and I smiled back. I turned off the light before I passed out.

[shewantsthev]

1-200

Wow this is a lot but okay200: My crush’s name is: Bernie Sanders
199: I was born in: 1999? Is this what this is asking 
198: I am really: gay
197: My cellphone company is: AT&T
196: My eye color is: green 
195: My shoe size is: 7.5 
194: My ring size is: I forgot. Something small
193: My height is: 5'3"
192: I am allergic to: bullshit and republicans. Other than that, nothing 
191: My 1st car was: a 2000 chevy cavalier. It was red and I loved it except it was a piece of shit 
190: My 1st job was: OfficeMax 
189: Last book you read: Why Does The World Exist? By some guy
188: My bed is: soft and filled with dogs and orange and great
187: My pet: I have prim, my soul mate and axel, a sweet dummy. I also have fish named Rex and Rocko and a snake named Jasper
186: My best friend: is amazing and great and I miss her
185: My favorite shampoo is: my recent favorite is the tea tree shampoo but I colored my hair recently and had to witch to shampoo safe for that 
184: Xbox or ps3: Xbox but I don't play either enough to really care
183: Piggy banks are: pretty nice. This reminds me of the time my house got robbed and the police took my piggy bank for prints and promised they would give it back but never did 
182: In my pockets: my wallet and chopstick 
181: On my calendar: a lot. This is a busy month. But Colorado soon :)
180: Marriage is: I wouldn't know 
179: Spongebob can: okay spongebob is the shit
178: My mom: isn't perfect but is great 
177: The last three songs I bought were? I don't know about individual songs but the other day I got tired of the radio and bought a bunch of CDs for my car
176: Last YouTube video watched: I don't know exactly but I've been watching a lot of John Oliver videos 
175: How many cousins do you have? Too may to count 
174: Do you have any siblings? I have 3ish stepsiblings 
173: Are your parents divorced? Yes since I was 4
172: Are you taller than your mom? I wish 
171: Do you play an instrument? I kinda sorta used to but no
170: What did you do yesterday? I don't remember? I think I worked?[ I Believe In ]
169: Love at first sight: maybe a little 
168: Luck: sometimes 
167: Fate: no 
166: Yourself: nope
165: Aliens: hell yeah
164: Heaven: no 
163: Hell: no 
162: God: I actually very strongly don't believe in god 
161: Horoscopes: no 
160: Soul mates: maybe 
159: Ghosts: not entirely sure but probably not 
158: Gay Marriage: fuck yeah 
157: War: depends on the situation 
156: Orbs: what
155: Magic: why[ This or That ]
154: Hugs or Kisses: both? Depends on my mood 
153: Drunk or High: high 
152: Phone or Online: online 
151: Red heads or Black haired: black hair 
150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes
149: Hot or cold: cold
148: Summer or winter: winter
147: Autumn or Spring: spring!!
146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 
145: Night or Day: night
144: Oranges or Apples: apples
143: Curly or Straight hair: straight 
142: McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds
141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: milk chocolate 
140: Mac or PC: Pc
139: Flip flops or high heals: flip flops
138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor:
 Stop attach a persons value to their economic status/ wealth :) 137: Coke or Pepsi: neither 
136: Hillary or Obama: Obama 😍
135: Burried or cremated: I want my body donated for organs and/or science. Although I like having just a spot so maybe just a tombstone 
134: Singing or Dancing: singing 
133: Coach or Chanel: ew
132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who
131: Small town or Big city: big city for sure
130: Wal-Mart or Target: target 
129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: I don't even care 
128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure?
127: East Coast or West Coast: west coast
126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday
125: Chocolate or Flowers: bothhh
124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney
123: Yankees or Red Sox: I don't sport[ Here’s What I Think About ]
122: War: depends on the situation 
121: George Bush: no 
120: Gay Marriage: always
119: The presidential election: it was awful, vile, and disgusting. The results were bullshit because fuck the electoral college but also it made me lose faith in humanity 
118: Abortion: it's always the persons choice what to do with their body
117: MySpace: never had one
116: Reality TV: it's stupid 
115: Parents: they exist
114: Back stabbers: I think we can all agree they're trash
113: Ebay: I'm indifferent 
112: Facebook: its gotten annoying lately but it's a necessary evil
111: Work: I like getting paid 
110: My Neighbors: they're okay for neighbors. I feel bad that our dog barks at them all the time. 
109: Gas Prices: they're high but whatever 
108: Designer Clothes: you do you im too broke 
107: College: it's gonna put me in debt forever but I'm excited 
106: Sports: I don't understand the interest but whatever 
105: My family: they're okay
104: The future: we are all gonna die [ Last time I ]
103: Hugged someone: tidy my teacher hugged me because she was happy to see me 
102: Last time you ate: I had pizza like 5 hours ago
101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: I saw a friend two days ago I haven't seen in a while
100: Cried in front of someone: I don't remember exactly 
99: Went to a movie theater: it's been too long 
98: Took a vacation: since a year ago
97: Swam in a pool: about a year ago. Well, swim isn't necessarily the word because guess who can't do that. I just chill in the water 
96: Changed a diaper: gosh it's been some time. A year or more?
95: Got my nails done: a lot of years ago
94: Went to a wedding: a year ago was my moms wedding 
93: Broke a bone: never 
92: Got a peircing: my nose about 2 years ago 
91: Broke the law: technically I am now 
90: Texted: now[ MISC ]
89: Who makes you laugh the most: I don't laugh much
88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dogs
87: The last movie I saw: some horror movie with my mom 
86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: leaving this town
85: The thing im not looking forward to: so much 
84: People call me: I don't really have a nickname
83: The most difficult thing to do is: go through major depression 
82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: I've had 2
81: My zodiac sign is: Taurus
80: The first person i talked to today was: my mom 
79: First time you had a crush: technically my first was a ginger in kindergarten but my first real one was in middle school 
78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: prim 😂
77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: yesterday! I remember that part but not who it was or what it was
76: Right now I am talking to: a group chat and 2 other people 
75: What are you going to do when you grow up: not entirely sure yet but I want to be a trauma surgeon 
74: I have/will get a job: yes? I'm not sure what this is asking 
73: Tomorrow: I have school and class in the evening 
72: Today: I was at school 
71: Next Summer: hopefully I'll be doing something fun 
70: Next Weekend: next weekend is surprisingly kinda free 
69: I have these pets: I answered this 
68: The worst sound in the world: someone saying goodbye 
67: The person that makes me cry the most is: myself 
66: People that make you happy: my friends I don't know 
65: Last time I cried: earlier today 
64: My friends are: great 
63: My computer is: falling apart. I need a new one but still broke 
62: My School: is actually garbage and I can't wait to leave 
61: My Car: is much nicer that my old one 
60: I lose all respect for people who: physically, sexually, or emotionally abuse people, are racist, homophobic, transphobic, etc. support Trump, actually there's a lot I don't respect many people 
59: The movie I cried at was: okay I used to always cry at the notebook it was horrible 
58: Your hair color is: red now 
57: TV shows you watch: lately shameless but all time fav is greys anatomy. Also watch a lot of criminal minds 
56: Favorite web site: google.com 
55: Your dream vacation: Traveling all over the world. I want to be in the south of France again 
54: The worst pain I was ever in was: when my heart broke 
53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium well 
52: My room is: pretty chill. Representative of me 
51: My favorite celebrity is: Demi Lovato 
50: Where would you like to be: anywhere but here 
49: Do you want children: maybe possibly
48: Ever been in love: yup
47: Who’s your best friend: gabby 
46: More guy friends or girl friends: girls I guess
45: One thing that makes you feel great is: drugs 
44: One person that you wish you could see right now: nobody 
43: Do you have a 5 year plan: haha I barley have a 5 minute plan 
42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: sort of. Just traveling 
41: Have you pre-named your children: yes
40: Last person I got mad at: Ryan 
39: I would like to move to: California 
38: I wish I was a professional: everything [ My Favorites ]
37: Candy: Reese's 
36: Vehicle: camaro 
35: President: Obama 
34: State visited: New York 
33: Cellphone provider: I don't care 
32: Athlete: really don't care 
31: Actor: probably Leonardo DiCaprio 
30: Actress: Not sure. Drew Barrymore maybe? Maybe Sandra bullock 
29: Singer: Demi Lovato 
28: Band: Nirvana 
27: Clothing store: everything here and there 
26: Grocery store: HyVee
25: TV show: Greys Anatomy
24: Movie: 21 Days 
23: Website: Tumblr
22: Animal: Penguin?
21: Theme park: don't know 
20: Holiday: Fourth of July, not for the patriotism but the blowing stuff up 
19: Sport to watch: basketball
18: Sport to play: basketball
17: Magazine: not sure 
16: Book: Impulse by Ellen Hopkins 
15: Day of the week: Saturday 
14: Beach: beach in saint marie de la mer
13: Concert attended: Demi Lovato 
12: Thing to cook: pasta
11: Food: Italian 
10: Restaurant: Olive Garden or IHOP 
9: Radio station: 96.5 the buzz 
8: Yankee candle scent: I like ocean scents 
7: Perfume: stuff I got in France 
6: Flower: who even knows 
5: Color: orange 
4: Talk show host: Ellen 
3: Comedian: not really sure 
2: Dog breed: Doberman 
1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Yes