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mifustudy · 10 days ago

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Ramona Renaissance: The Multi-Media Timeline of Ramona Flowers

The Scott Pilgrim vs. the World franchise has charmed audiences with its unique blend of action, comedy, and romance, offering an imaginative perspective on early adulthood. This story follows protagonist Scott Pilgrim and his mysterious love interest, Ramona Flowers, in a nerd-culture-reference-filled narrative; quiet the mouthful, I know. From Bryan Lee O'Malley's original graphic novel series, Edgar Wright’s film, and BenDavid Grabinski’s anime series, Ramona's characterization undergoes nuanced adjustments that show her development as a character through the varying plot points in each retelling. Her portrayal across the adaptations is a centerpiece for analysis and discussion surrounding this franchise. Fully understanding each depiction of Ramona requires examining how her relationships, personality, and internal struggles affect and shape the medium she is involved in. I aim to highlight each adaptation's intricacies and how they affect the overall story plus Ramona Flowers’ character.

Following a complex character like Ramona Flowers across more than a decade's worth of content between three types of media is a demanding task. With the constantly evolving climate of what is acceptable in entertainment in the past couple of years to creative differences, the story of Scott Pilgrim has shifted as many times as Ramona has alone. These overall plot shifts are the catalysts of said changes within her character. To satiate the overwhelmed, let’s break down the basics of this puzzling persona.

The most crucial part of Ramona’s character in Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is the catalyst of the general plot in each adaptation: her past romantic endeavors. These previous partners fall under the title of the “Seven Evil Exes,” all of them posing as a threat to Scott and Ramona’s budding relationship throughout the story. Being well-known for her hectic love life both in and out of the fan base, Ramona Flowers brings more than that to the table. Creator Bryan Lee O’Malley lays out the process of developing Ramona’s character in the afterword of Volume 1 of the graphic novel series: Scott Pilgrim’s Precious Little Life:

“I briefly worked with Brian Wood on one of his cool, sophisticated, ass-kicking New York girl comics. Part of the genesis of Ramona was wanting to grab a character like that and take her out of her element to boring old Toronto—I think that’s why she was a rollerblading delivery girl” (172).

In this brief passage, O’Malley makes a point to reflect on the inspiration pulled from American comic writer and illustrator Brian Wood. Being a Canadian artist, the joke of using American character tropes becomes a recurring theme in the series, along with Ramona’s habitual hair dying. Within the stories of each adaptation, this woman’s introduction to Scott Pilgrim’s life was through dreams. Throughout the first couple volumes of Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, readers are thrown into an ebb of video game references, indie rock, and relationship troubles as Scott navigates his twenties, paired witty dialogue against the backdrop of Toronto, Canada. As Ramona enters the scene, it is evident that she becomes a central figure in the series with every page turn; her presence influences much of the story's intrigue and conflicts. Originally introduced as an ordinary object of a male protagonist’s affection, Ramona persistently exudes an undeniable sense of unique appeal with her character quirks.

A quirk particular to the book series that is worth mentioning is something called The Glow. First occurring in the last few pages of Volume 1, this odd trait appears due to Scott name-dropping a significant ex-partner of Ramona’s, Gideon Graves (Precious Little Life, 164). The Glow is a type of “psychic warfare” created by Gideon to imprison people in their heads to “weaponize(d)" their emotions (Fandom.com), strengthening negative emotions and having them overpower any positive ones. This power was made to tear down relationships Ramona attempts to form while also being infectious through physical touch, proving to be quite the plot device. The usage of this bizarre ability is seen most notably in Volume 4, Scott Pilgrim Gets It Together, as Scott and Ramona confront the insecurities in their connection due to a book-exclusive character leading to harmful judgments (127-129). The infectious quality of The Glow is shown with Scott himself experiencing the effects of the glow, giving the audience a chance to see how it feels firsthand (166-171).

With the absence of The Glow in the film and anime adaptations, each story undercuts vital aspects of Scott and Ramona’s relationship, stripping viewers of an in-depth portrayal of their bond through a strange phenomenon. The movie has its own version of this plot device, being close in concept to the novel. This Glow stand-in is a microchip planted into Ramona’s neck by Gideon, though it feels more like a throwaway line rather than a definite story choice; the only noticeable challenge between Ramona and Scott through this microchip is their argument over the Seven Evil Exes and Ramona’s overall dating history (Scott Pilgrim, 1:18:06). The underutilization of a device like The Glow in the film adaptation is a hindrance to the plot. Following the discussion of the replacement and absence of a plotline through The Glow in this medium, it would be best to explore the rest of what hinders Ramona’s growth story-wise further.

The depiction of Ramona in the Scott Pilgrim vs. the World film takes significant steps back in characterization compared to the graphic novel series. Merging multiple books into 112 minutes is daunting, many things had to be done to write a plot that fit what was needed to create a faithful enough adaptation. The most notable change is Ramona Flowers’ character as she enters movie trope territory. Being introduced in each iteration through a dream, many reviewers and audience members pinned her as a “manic pixie dream girl.” This trope, originated by film critic Nathan Rabin, alludes to quirky and desirable female characters who are used to push a narrative forward; these characters often lack depth and act as romantic interests for male protagonists (Dixon). The story alterations made for this cinematic adaptation display the departure from the nuanced character Ramona was in the books. These alterations have led to the major mischaracterization of her among a much wider audience.

Throughout the 2010 cinematic release, Ramona Flowers’ role in the story has been debated as time goes on. With the importance of her Evil Exes being the main push of the plot, it has been noted that these fights for her affection have put Ramona in an “influential position” (Dixon). This unusual predicament is one of the reasons she is considered a “manic pixie dream girl” in the first place. Within the sea of Scott Pilgrim reviewers, few of them stray away from this idea, but Emma Shapera decided to get vocal. Shapera’s article on the pop culture news site Collider focuses on why Ramona “Deserves Another Look,” explicitly pointing toward her movie appearance. With prior knowledge of her characterization from the source material—the graphic novel series—it is evident that Ramona Flowers’ past relationships shaped her into who she is when the audience meets her. Shapera states the way these connections affected Ramona’s persona gradually made her self-aware of the men she’s been with trying to take control. Not wanting to go through with that again, she was adamant that her new love interest, Scott, would not get to do the same (“Why Ramona Flowers”).

After discussing the distinctions between the film and novels concerning Ramona, it is finally time to set the scene for the franchise’s most recent addition: the anime series. Ramona’s depiction in the anime series Scott Pilgrim Takes Off notably diverges from the nuanced characterization in the movie and books. Starting by following the same formula, the show eased the audience into a false sense of security. By the end of Episode One, everything is flipped upside down; Scott Pilgrim goes missing during his fight with an Evil Ex! This swiftly transitions into Ramona taking on the protagonist role. With the camera on her, the narrative focuses on her avoidant attachment style and relationships with surrounding characters. This element of Ramona's character was severely undeveloped in the film, so having the anime focus on something the mainstream adaptation failed to expand on does a great deal of work recontextualizing Ramona’s character (Fox).

There is no better way to start breaking down Ramona’s developed connections with others than with her romantic interest, Scott Pilgrim. The attraction between these two characters is unquestionable the moment they meet in Takes Off, which is unheard of compared to the film and novels; their relationship grew gradually while the anime took an immediate turn. From a gimmicky top ten list, Josuha Fox describes Ramona as “being as in love with Scott as he was with her,” and this sentiment is clear throughout each episode (“Biggest Differences,” 7). As the show progresses with the absence of Scott as the protagonist, Ramona’s mission is to discover what had happened to him. As she moves through the plot to find her boyfriend of one day’s whereabouts, Ramona is tasked with confronting her past—also known as her Evil Exes. Going to her exes for answers, as she believes they are the culprits of Scott’s disappearance. Her eagerness to find Scott transcends her fear, forcing her not to run away like she always had before. As Fox had put it, “it’s impossible to see their relationship as anything other than true love” (“Biggest Differences,” 7).

Each episode focuses on a different Evil Ex and how Ramona reconciles with them. To avoid explaining and getting into the intricacies of every single one, I picked my favorite episode that shows how much Ramona’s character grows in this adaptation: Episode Three. Episode Three, “Ramona Rents a Video” introduces the audience to Ramona’s fourth Evil Ex, Roxie Richter, and how their relationship blossomed then died. With Roxie having little screen time across the franchise, her storyline this episode is a breath of fresh air similar Ramona’s character rework. In the episode, the two women battle in a video store, somehow sending them in and out of reality through different movies as Ramona tries to piece together where Scott had gone and why Roxie ended up being so cruel. After flashing through the real and film world while simultaneously looking back on their relationship, Ramona finally apologizes for how she had treated Roxie (“Ramona Rents a Video,” 16:30-18:14). “I was too afraid to face you,” Ramona explained before Roxie responds, heartbroken: “You were afraid? Good for you! All I wanted was for you to see me” (17:41-17:58)! The connection between the two slowly reforming is heartwarming while also displaying a crucial upgrade in Ramona’s character; this interaction would not have happened in the film.

The multifaceted portrayal of Ramona Flowers in the Scott Pilgrim vs. the World franchise perfectly reflects the developmental changes each adaptation has undergone. Starting with a graphic novel series, to a critically acclaimed film, and finally landing a Netflix original anime, Ramona’s personality has been through multiple reimagined storylines. As the focal point of most analysis and discussion in the fanbase over the years, it is most important to recognize her growth as a character. Examining the creative interpretations and narrative differences across mediums provides a deeper understanding of Ramona’s depth and relevance in each rendition.

sources below: https://pastebin.com/nLum4ta0

#scott pilgrim vs the world #ramona flowers #character development #i love ramona flowers #this was so much fun to write #manic pixie dream girl

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avatarmerida · 2 years ago

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Dreaming and Watching

Corny little huntlow oneshot about what I think the finale title could mean 💚💛

—

The Collector lured them into a circle, bouncing around the room, delighted to have new play things.

“Oh boy oh boy oh boy!” The whimsical voice echoed in glee. “Just imagine the games we can play with these guys, King! We’ve never had players like this before!”

“Yeah! Games! Of course!” Luz laughed nervously. “W-we’re so excited to play games with you!”

“Yippe!” He exclaimed, twirling in the air. “What should we play first? Let’s do something new! What kind of games do you like?”

“We like all kinds of games!” Amity said, trying to steady her voice. “W-we like nice, safe games! I think those are the most fun!”

“Hmmm, no that sounds boring,” the Collector decided, not taking it into consideration very long. “I wanna play make believe! Do you guys have good imaginations?”

“I’ve been told mine is a little too good sometimes,” said Luz quietly.

“You have a human imagination!” The Collector laughed, spinning around her on a bed of stars. “Oh wow! I bet you could think of some fun things!”

“Yeah, I bet I could!” Luz said. “I bet we all could, but I think we also know how things can-.”

“Do you have an imagination?” The Collector turned to Hunter who raised his arm instinctively in front of Gus and Willow.

“Um, I guess so?” He said carefully. “It’s.. not like all this exactly, but I-.”

“Wo-hoo! A grimwalker game! I can’t believe I finally get to play with the grimwalker!” sang the godly child, happy with the answer. “Let’s learn more about you! We never got to talk!”

“Um... okay?” Hunter said cautiously, Willow reached out to hold his hand to assure him she was there as the Collector held his eye contact.

“Hmm so if you have an imagination, is it a fun imagination or a scary one like your scary uncle?” Pondered the child, wanting to make sure he approved what Hunter brought to the imaginary table. “Cause I don’t like scary. Ya know, I’ve always wondered what goes on in your mind! I never got to ask! But why ask when we can just see?”

The Collector quickly spun around Hunter, nearly knocking Willow over in the process, as she refused to let go of his hand. When the star child leapt up he held what appeared to be Golden dust in his arms. He threw it in the air like confetti and as they fell they connected to form a wall of golden glitter. The group look on in confusion as the rest of the room darkened so the focus point could be known. Suddenly, like a movie screen, an image appeared.

It was Hunter, dressed in a Hexside uniform sporting every track color happily walking down the hallway with his arms with books.

“Wait, when did this happen?” Gus asked, knowing this wasn’t the uniform he had worn as a disguise when they first met.

“Is this in the future?” Amity wondered, noting the hair Hunter had was more similar to his current look.

As the Hunter on the screen finished gathering his books, Flapjack appeared beside him and landed on his shoulder. This was clearly not a known timeline.

“That must mean...” started Luz.

“It’s my dream,” realized Hunter. “It’s the dream I always-.” He paused and looked with wide eyes to his side at Willow, still holding his hand and fixated on the screen. He gulped. “Uh-oh.”

Dream Hunter proceeded to walk down the halls of Hexside, his face wore a wide smile and he walked with an obvious confidence he hadn’t known since his Golden Guard days. Every student he passed acknowledged him, offering a wave or friendly hello, clearing showing how welcomed and known he was, how naturally he it, how obvious it was that he was meant to be there.

“Ya know, we really don’t need to see this!” Hunter called as the dream continued to play. “My imagination isn’t very impressive actually so I’m sure there’s something else you’d rather-.”

“Shhhh!” The Collector called down. “I’ve never seen this one befoooore! No spoilers!”

The group didn’t know what the Collector’s intentions were, but they couldn’t deny it was nice seeing Hunter like this, even if it was only in his dreams.

“Hey Hunter!” Gus called, turning the corner to catch up to him

“Oh look! There’s me! There’s me!” Exclaimed the real Gus with excitement, pointing to himself.

“Hey Gus!” Dream Hunter greeted his friend and they did their signature handshake. “You ready for that test next period?”

“‘Course!” Said Gus with ease. “It’s child’s play. Are you ready for Cosmic Con this weekend?”

“Always!” Hunter said, hyped. “We’re definitely gonna win best costume!”

“We always do!” Gus agreed. “I’m gonna go snag us some seats next to each other so we can do some last minute flash cards before the test, don’t be late!”

“I never am!” Hunter called as Gus disappeared into the classroom.

The real Hunter felt the real Gus nudge his ribs. Hunter looked over to him and Gus gave him a wide smile.

“I dunno what you were so nervous about, this is awesome,” whispered Gus. “And you made me taller too, thanks dude.”

“Haha yeah of course,” Hunter replied, turning his attention nervously back to the screen. “It’s not over yet.”

“Hunter! Thank you so much for letting me borrow your history notes!” Said a dream Amity, as Hunter passed her locker. “They really brought up my grade. Your footnotes were especially helpful.”

“Of course! Anytime.” Hunter said with a wide toothy grin. “And if you ever need help studying, I’d be happy to tutor you.”

“Really? That would be so great!” Amity beamed in a way that felt somewhat unnatural, mostly likely because Hunter had no real world source to base this response on. “It’s amazing how you managed to be the top student and still find time for tutoring!”

“What can I say? I’m great at making schedules,” he said with a modest shrug. “You can keep the notes, I’ve got them all memorized.”

He offered dream Amity finger guns as he continued his trek, whistling as he walked utterly content.

On the ground, the real Amity viciously glared at him, daggers in her eyes. “I’ve never gotten below an excellent grade in Isles history,” she whispered to Hunter harshly over Luz’s shoulder.

“Well yeah duh it’s a dream! It’s not real, Blight!” Hunter whispered harshly back.

“It’s your dream, it’s my nightmare.”

“Amity! That’s no way to talk to your tutor!” Willow joined in the harsh whispering. Amity gave her a sour look as the Collector shushed them again.

Hunter was starting to sweat, hoping to Titan that Willow didn’t notice. He also hoped the Collector would be unimpressed with his imagination and move on to something else before they got too far. But the dream continued playing.

“Hey, hermano!” Luz called, running to catch up with him obviously on her way to Amity’s locker. “Mama is making sancocho y tostones for dinner tonight! You’ll be there after flyer derby right?”

“Of course!” He assured with a smile. “But I might be a little late, I’ve got a date tonight.”

“Bring her!” Luz exclaimed as she reached Amity’s locker and he continued walking. “You know she’s invited too!”

“Of course!” He called back, laughing to himself as he turned the corner and finally found his destination.

“Oh! Look, there’s me!” Said Willow excitedly, not noticing the sickly, panicked look that overtook Hunter’s face.

“Heh, ya know maybe we should stop watching before we get too-.”

As Willow fully entered the dreamscape, a sort of rosey haze overtook the scene and time seemed to slow down. She leaned against a locker that was meant to be Hunter’s, clutching her books tightly to her chest. When she spotted him, a wide smile overtook her face and her braids swung to the side in slow motion.

“Hi,” she said sweetly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and biting her lip.

“Hi Captain,” he responded in the same sweet tone, effortlessly leaning against the locker and looking down at her with adoring eyes. “Are you waiting for someone special?”

“Oh, just my boyfriend,” she said with a dreamy sigh. “Maybe you know him?”

“Hmm, yeah I think I do.” Dream Hunter confirmed as he leaned down to press a gentle but obviously familiar kiss onto Willow’s lips. Dream Willow smiled and happily rose up onto her tip toes to kiss him back placing a hand on his cheek to imply she intended to keep him there awhile.

The real Hunter was mortified.

He dared glance to his side where the real Willow stood, saying nothing but fiddling with her braid and he couldn’t tell exactly what she was feeling. Hunter cursed himself for not insisting everyone close their eyes. The rest of the group had begun whispering among themselves, directing their eyes away from the screen as politely as they could, not knowing what else to do as the dream counterparts of their friends had been kissing for awhile now.

“Does uh, anything else happen?” Amity asked gently after a minute. “Is like Belos gonna come and ruin things or...?”

“No this is uh this is it,” said Hunter, inhaling sharply. “This is... this is the rest of the dream.”

“Ooooh.” Said three out of the four onlookers. Willow still said nothing, as a soft red overtook her face.

“And so you have this dream... a lot?” Gus asked. “Wait, is this why you kiss your pillow so-.”

“Okaaaay! I think we can move on now!” sajd Hunter shakily, his face red and sweaty. “Let’s look at someone else’s dream, Huh? Let’s uh let’s invade your privacy and see how you like it!”

“Ugh, dreams about school? And kissing?Ew!” The Collector declared, sticking out his tongue. “That’s no fun! Do you all dream about school and kissing?”

The group mumbled a serious of affirmation seeing that confirming this would save them from Hunters fate and keep their dreams private.

“Ugh, that’s so boring!” groaned the Collector dramatically. “Why would you dream about something you can do in real life? That’s like wasting a dream! We have a loootta work to do here!”

He and King vanished into a cloud of color and sparkles and the gang knew they were safe for now. They all let out a sigh of relief as Hunter offered them a burning glare. They looked at him apologetically before diverting their attention to the ground, Luz said something about making a plan for when the Collector returned and the group quickly jumped on board, happy to have something else to talk about.

“Traitors,” Hunter mumbled under his breath.

“Hey,” came a soft voice beside him, the only person not hiding in the group.

“Uh, hey,” said Hunter, clearing his throat as the realization that having his dream exposed may have also been embarrassing for Willow. Despite that possibility, she had not let go of his hand. “Listen, I’m sorry if that made you uncomfortable, I didn’t know he was gonna do that and I should’ve-.”

“Don’t listen to what the Collector said,” Willow advised with conviction, cutting him off.

“What?”

“About your dreams not being special,” she clarified. “I’ve had dreams like that, about being able to walk down the hallway not feeling scared or worried or like people were staring at me and whispering. That might not seem necessarily exciting or impossible to other people, but that doesn’t mean it is wasn’t a dream worth having. It’s okay to want things to be nice and calm, especially after everything you’ve been though. Sometimes the most simple things seem like the most impossible.”

“Oh, uh thanks,” he said, relieved. “Ya know, it was actually the first dream I’ve had in a while. Before, they were mostly nightmares and there were times when I didn’t dream at all.

“Well, I’m glad you’re having good dreams,” she smiled. “And I’m glad to be a part of one.”

“Yeah?” Hunter chuckled.

“Yeah,” said Willow brightly, giving his hand a squeeze. “I wanna help you get all the things you’ve dreamed of. All of the things.”

Hunter looked down at their linked hands before looking back up to her face as he was met with a playful wink. A familiar rosey frame surrounded Willow again. It wasn’t exclusive to his dreams, just to her. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Like I said, I’ve had dreams very similar to yours. The only difference is that in mine you’re waiting by my locker.”

#huntlow #winter toh #huntlow fanfiction #Willow park #Hunter toh #toh #the owl house

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ladythornofrivia · 1 year ago

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my heavenly salvation

Pair: Levi x Reader

Warnings: This series is going to be contain with fluff. Too much fluff. And smut. With mentions of self-harm, mentions of depression. Psychological abuse and bullying. Inspired by the Titanic movie.

A/N: Hi! I made a new chapter! Please enjoy! Let me know if you want to be tag!

(Please report if anyone decides to steal/plagiarize my work and notify me. Thank you.)

youtube

(Btw, I’m putting a different music because I don’t want anyone feel tired of hearing the same music. Enjoy!)

Chapter III

Heart of Thunder and Sea

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

The time during the confrontation with the Yeager brothers seemed endless. As they carried Zeke Yeager out, your stomach have ached by the time you escorted yourself at the giant lobby. And it wasn't the candy you ate. People kept giving glares and stares, especially a pack of young women--already married.

You didn't care about their stares or their ways of glaring at you in a thousand meanings. Staring was never a polite gesture, yet they still do it, anyway. People can be a menace to others by the means of making themselves superior.

Gulping, you sat at the nearby velvet seat, you examined the statue of a man killing the Titan by a spear at the top of Titan’s head.

You have seen Titans at close hand, as a bystander. Warriors…Titans…they act the same, but in different uniforms. You wonder what life is like without Titans—it’s hard to imagine for anyone. For centuries Titans had been born, as if they flow through everyone’s veins except Titans flowed through timeline.

As much as you’d like to believe that Titans are only a fever dream, and that your friends are fallen asleep, but it never was.

You wanted to know what’s like to be a Warrior.

Or an Eldian from Paradis.

You read an article or two regarding to Paradis, but as always, newspapers don’t align with reality. Marleyan and Eldian—both terrible people, two sides of the same coin. Maybe they’re terrible because they’ve been wronged each other, all thanks to the people in the past. King Fritz.

You never liked kings or royalty. All acted like Gods, but did terrible misdeeds behind their graced status. It irked you the most when most deaths were in vain while King Fritz passed away in his sleep. Needless to say, having a personal opinion in Marley will ultimately give you a final sentence.

However being a Marleyan or Eldian—both are cursed.

All you ever wanted in life wasn’t to be born as Marleyan or an Eldian. You wanted to be more than the name, you wanted to be free as your own self. Up until now, you’re still a beautiful bird in a golden and jeweled cage, anticipating the worst of those who consider you as a tool to unlock their personal needs.

“There you are, (y/n),” Gertrude said aloud, rushing over to your side, but you turned away from her without a word as if you don’t know her.

Out of nowhere, your wrist quickly snatched. You still didn’t look into Gertrude’s scolding eyes.

“You’re an embarrassment to us all. How could you leave your future husband in a poor state? You should’ve tended to his needs as a good wife, not a careless barbarian.”

Pulling your wrist, you looked at her strongly in the eye and said, “Then why don’t you tend to his needs? It seems like you wanted to be queen. Just say the word, and he’ll listen, since you complimented him so much.”

“You disrespectful little bitch,” Gertrude seethed. “I taught you better than this.”

“I’ll see you at dinner, mama,” you said, rushing off elsewhere. Escape from a boring rich life, that is.

~~~

At dinner, everyone in the first class ate their first meal in Goliath, filled with rare goods and ingredients to make the lavish dinner more lively. Everyone complimented their supper, which greatly pleased their injured king.

Zeke, on the other hand, played it off so well, that everyone still had their concerns on Zeke’s leg. Whoever struck Zeke must be punished, some said. But they’ll never know who’s responsible for Zeke’s misfortune.

You, on the other hand, still beautiful and trapped, unsure how to speak to people. Thankfully, people don’t pay attention to you. And that your blessings have been counted that no one could ever know your real thoughts.

Gertrude kept praising the Countess through and through. It irritated you so harshly that you wanted someone to suffocate you, but at the end of the day, you stared at the grandfather clock, watching it tick, counting down for elaborated dinner to be over.

~~~

As you returned back to your bedroom suite, your hands reached for the bed, your dress tightened your chest—no cold air resided in you. You reached for the lace, but each time you untie the knot at your back, it restrained more. Your back ache from arching, filling with sweat and anxiety. Your head was spinning, and your breathing haggard so hard your shouted for the servant.

No answer came.

“Prudence,” you said in panic. Each time you unlace and remove an accessory, you began to hate things. You hated heavy objects—heavy jewels, heavy room, heavy colors displayed before your eyes. Everything wasn’t enough for you.

“Prudence!” you cried. “Prudence, where are you?! Please help me! Help me, Prudence!”

Having enough, your hands threw the jewelry against the wall, your dress came off and you threw into the wall, as well, leaving you frustrated with loose periwinkle nightgown and a light reddish silk robe. Slamming your suite door, you realized that your life will be eternally identical.

“I hate jewels, I hate gowns. I hate parties and pleasantries from rich people. I hate permissions, I hate laws and kings and royals! No life is good when you’re not truly happy or free,” you said to yourself. “Or to be silently mocked when I…”

Your heart stopped. Your mind numbed.

Finally, you had enough.

~~~

Rushing into the deck can raise disruption and questionable looks from outsiders. By outsiders, the people from the first class. You wanted the Titans to return and crush these good pretenders. For once, you wanted to be feared as Eren Yeager. But no one believe that you’ll mount to anything critically harsh as Eren’s well-known reputation. While Eren’s role is mysteriously uprising, yours was completely stagnant and laughable. Stagnant because of rich life, laughable because of your father’s last act.

To be so hateful is easy, to be kind during hardest times is harder. No one believes you’ll mount to anything. Your life is still and painfully boring. You wanted more, but each time you wanted more, your rich life and reputation to uphold weighs you down harder. You tried to be kinder, but instead, the worst side of you prevail. You wanted to eliminate the worst side of you, but having no way out was way worse. You hoped for a better change for your gain of self-respect and dignity, but rich, pretentious people talk, otherwise.

Why can’t your life be simple? Having no rich or first class status means freedom at your own expense without anyone judging you. With their devilish eyes, what can you do? You didn’t commit a treason. You just wanted an air to breathe.

But as you run, the skies turned darker than other nights. Deep outlines of moonlight sky was no longer found. Thick clouds surrounding, and the sea’s air was profoundly bitter with salt and metal. Any air is better than inside the Goliath.

Your tears ran down without stopping. With your silk robe on, people from the first class gasped at your attire as if you’re naked. You weren’t. You’re still in your nightgown, your long hair tangled in a mess and your running became sloppier, and your vision fuzzier.

Reaching at the end of the ship, you wanted to jump off, but, it’s an easy way for an exit. So you managed to find an industrial rope and tied it to a noose on each end. Without anyone coming by, you placed one end on the metal stand, the other slipped onto your neck. As you stepped into and over the railing, you looked at the skies rather than below. In your heart you knew there’s nothing below other than black ocean.

Taking a big breath, your foot lifted off from the railing, and—

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you, miss,” a deep voice said.

Gasping, you turned and saw a man in a dark fedora hat and a dark coat with black Oxford shoes and grey trousers with a gold line of pocket watch chained from his pocket. From a few distance, he’s tall, but realistically, he’s an inch taller than your petite height. Despite all that, he ambled towards you in a careful gesture as if you’re an animal cornered at the edge, unknown and unsure of the other man’s perception.

“Don’t go near, dear sir,” you said in panic, hands shaking and clutching tight against the railing.

“Come off the railing,” he said, somewhat pleaded—though a bit firmly. “We can settle this, whatever your problem is, madam, we can discuss this.”

“Discuss? There’s nothing to be discussed. Nothing good will ever come to me.” Your hot tears streamed down, while the skies rumbled with groan. “I beg of you, don’t go near.”

His hand still outstretched. With a fedora hat, you couldn’t see his expression. “You would’ve been tangled.”

“I’d rather be tangled than to be strangled by the likes of those civilized people.”

The man said nothing. His hand wasn’t outstretched anymore. But still stayed by your side.

“I can’t go if you decide to stay on the railing.”

The sky rumbled again.

“Please go. I don’t want you to see this,” you wept.

He shook his head. “I’m afraid I can’t. We’re already here at this point.” Then he took off coat, but not his fedora hat.

“I’m sorry what are you doing?”

The man took off his pocket watch, then slowly walked towards you as he said, “Do you like black tea?”

You looked at him, flabbergasted. “Wait, what?”

“Where I come from, drinking black tea was the greatest thing I ever experienced. When I first drink tea, it was from an expensive floral cup. This floral cup is beautiful I decided to save up money to buy and to make my own serving. When I finally got the floral cup, I grabbed it by the handle, though it broke and slipped from my hands, and so I used the top part as the handle, instead,” he explained.

“How do you handle your tea cup,” you asked, shaking.

“I’ll show you,” he said, gesture his hand and formed a position to how he drink from his cup. “It’s strange, isn’t it?”

You shook your head. “No. Not at all. I find it fascinating!”

Underneath a dark fedora hat, he smirked.

“I like eating scones that comes with it,” you said.

“What goes along with black tea?”

“Anything, really. Though I wouldn’t suggest anything too sweet, it gives a bad reputation to the stomach.”

He chuckled. “What do you suggest then?”

“Scones, it has be blueberry or raspberry or strawberry. With my tea, I like to add with lemon and a little honey. But sometimes I like to drink tea in a plain fashion.”

He nodded. “That seems reasonable.”

“Sometimes I drink tea whenever there’s a cold weather coming by.”

“Perhaps you can show me,” he said.

“Show me,” you repeated, puzzled.

“Show me how you handle your tea and scones.”

“Maybe…Maybe I can show you more,” you offered.

By then, his hand reached towards you, ever so gently as a gentle fire has touched your numbed heart.

“Then come with me, show me your ways, and I’ll show mine,” he offered in return.

With a last tear slid down, your heart stopped aching. But the rumbled sky grew louder.

“Pace yourself,” he said, almost sounding like a purr, his hands occupying you.

As your turned, realizing the noose around your neck has been discarded. Your eyes met his. Those blue and steel colored eyes glistened like rain droplet shining.

Any Marleyan would take pride on being handsome, when the man in front of you obtained the handsomest face you’ve ever seen, like a moving painting, glowing like halo.

His hands were still in yours.

For a moment, the time stops. At a simple gesture, your hands gripped tightly to his.

His face leaned in, nearly an inch apart.

“You’re beautiful,” he said. “Your tears are still there, but I feel as though your sadness stopped.”

“That’s because you’re the flaming soul,” you said.

He chuckled. “Your ways of describing me is amusing.”

“You don’t like it?”

He chuckled again. “Never give into your despair. You’re so much more than a girl on the edge. Levi Ackerman,” he said, still holding your hands.

“(y/n) O’Connell,” you said, flashing him a wide, sincere smile.

“Beautiful,” he whispered.

Though you giggled at his words, you foot stepped at the railing, and slipped.

At the raging thunder comes, the skies shot with a loud bang—lightning strikes flashed and rainfall flow harder, making for you and Levi having a difficult time.

“Don’t let go,” Levi instructed.

With quick thinking, the noose on his other hand. “Quick—give me your other hand—hold onto the noose!”

With bravery, you did as he said. You grabbed onto the noose, and Levi yanked you up, though it wasn’t easy. The heavy rainfall made you and Levi’s eyesight twice as complicated.

“I’ll pull you up!” With a huge huff, grunting, Levi tugged you up with success. You stick the landing—on top of him.

His fedora hat loosened, a shade of black hair adorned his youth countenance. His rock solid body underneath you filled you with warmth. You’re a moth to his flame. But you weren’t a terrible insect. This is what all you wanted. Warmth.

Despite the warmth, his eyes never leave yours. Your body grew with heat. Flustered, you tried to get up, but his hand instinctively gripped to your backside. In the heart of thunder and sea, his heart was the loudest. Your heart was thumping, pacing.

You blinked, your throat went dry.

Levi cleared his throat. “Forgive me,” he uttered.

You got up with him, and snickered. “That was fun.”

“Believe me, (y/n),” he began. “What we could’ve almost have underneath this insufferable ship is more than the fall.”

“You saved me,” you said, then your arms tackling him for a solemn of embrace as a full, life-longing gratitude. Your chest tightened with restraint sorrow.

Levi, on the other hand, is too stunned to utter a form of coherent sentence.

Tucking a hair strand behind your ear, you said, “I always wanted to be a mermaid.”

His eyebrow quirked. “You don’t say?”

You pulled back quickly as an apology. Reaching for his hand, you hoisted him up. You watched him grabbed his fedora hat, then his coat, and as he grabbed his coat, he gave you a piece of lavender handkerchief. “Keep this. If you ever need comfort, use this. Consider this as a token from me.”

Hesitantly, you kept the handkerchief as much as you want to keep the token. Keep the token feels right, yet wrong in a simultaneous way. “I want to see you,” you said.

Levi smirked once more underneath his fedora hat. “Don’t worry. You will.” Then walked off with his polished cane.

“Allow me to return the favor,” you shouted over the heavy rain. But in the heart of thunder and sea, you couldn’t see him anymore.

A pause hung in the air for a moment. Only the rain and the rumbling thunder and lighting strikes prevail your most provoked thoughts of the night. And it will soon come for tomorrow and the very next. “Levi,” you utter, a smoke past from your mouth, faintly speaking as you talk in secret with bitter sullen air and water.

Levi. Levi Ackerman.

Levi Ackerman.

The sound of unearthly heaven and stars slipped past from your lips.

Taglist: @colored-tr-panels @galactict3a @slay0368 @f1yh1gh

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charlieconwayy · 1 year ago

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Top 5 Freela moments?

this is truly like choosing a favorite child

i HAVE to go with the ending of TWOF, but rly did you expect anything less? just the most satisfying moment i have ever experienced in my tv viewing experience. the set up, the execution - fry literally walking into the frame and leela's face when he hands her the flower. aside from it being their first legit kiss (that i count anyway), it's SO important to their development. leela realizing that success/status/someone looking great on paper does not make someone the ideal partner, but what does is the feeling of relief you get when you see them and the way they make you feel special. i love how fry doesn't even remember nibbler saying he'll help him out w leela, so this was truly just a genuine moment of him being thoughtful. also fry's "yes!" when they fade to black is so sweet

okay i thought for a while about the number two slot and i think i have to pick "no matter what happens, you'll always be leela, the woman i love." fry was so frickin immature and lowkey sexist at the start of the series, which we see a ton of in i was a crustacean in love specifically or even in amazon women in the mood ("is she hot?" "she is all knowing" "in other words, no") and we've gradually seen him mature (my fav "zapp's not the only one becoming marriage material" "you're getting there" <3). leela's biggest fear w fry has always been his commitment issues and him getting bored of her. we've also seen her insecurities ab the way she looks throughout the show, so for him to confirm to her (when she's like entirely squid, mind you) that no matter how she looks, he will always love her is so special. it was the culmination of 7 seasons of development for both fry and their relationship, and i love leela's reaction (and her tentacles doing the princess diaries foot pop when they kiss lol).

i could just put moments from s4 on here and this entire list would be complete tbh....the best season, nothing is ever topping it. the sting is just a special moment and i can't even imagine watching it when it first aired. while we'd gotten little hints here and there that leela had feelings for fry, this episode just confirms the extent of those feelings. we know fry would rather die than be without leela, but this ep confirms that leela would rather die than be without fry. the whole ending segment is great, w leela trying to unalive herself so that she can "feel alright with him" and fry talking her out of it (first real "i love you" :') ) but GOD the feeling when they show the hospital room. the details that we see from all the things fry said to leela in her dream. amy's "they said you'd never wake up, fry never left your side for a second." leela holding her heart when she realizes that him talking to her is what inspired her to wake up!! the hug <3 it's so crazy to me that an animated show can show the intimacy and physicality between them so perfectly.

"dear fry, our time together was short but it was the best time of my life. - leela." for similar reasons to the one above, i love an ep that does a deep dive into leela's love for fry. this one, man. this one. leela marrying CUBERT just bc he resembles fry says it all. "i used to think there was someone for me." just her rage at fry and heartbreak that she will never see him again, while managing to create the successful future she had always wanted but ultimately realizing it's pointless without someone to share it with. that video card hits me so deeply when he says i love you the look on her face actually destroys me.....but what gets me most out of everything is the cavern on the green. leela has no idea where fry is. he could be in the past for all that she knows. but leela knows in her heart that if she leaves a message, somehow, somewhere, fry will see it and he will know how she feels. and he does. that to me is so beautiful, their love is fated no matter what universe or timeline that they're in.

this is a relatively new fav scene for me but "you're lonely and i'm lonely, but together, we're lonely together." freela had kind of just been bickering besties up until this episode, but this was the first time we'd really seen them connect on an intimate level since 102. fry is upset ab spending xmas alone for the first time, leela is upset ab spending her life alone. he's alone in the year 3000 and leela has spent a lifetime alone. we see fry so upset that he hurt leela, that he goes out of his way to buy her a gift and apologize (massive development in fry's emotional intelligence, esp if you compare this to 103 w bender) but leela ends up being okay. she holds his hand and tells him that they can be lonely together and it's such a gamechanging moment, you can just see the chemistry and the connection between the two of them.

#freela #futurama

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redwolfstabs · 1 year ago

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Hiii I'm back for more LoomHousen because KHBISBDIHZ

I actually told my girlfriend about this fic, and she really loved the plot (We're both down bad for Doug Van Housen haha) so now I have even more questions!!! Here, have a list!

- How did Billy end up in a totally different dimension? Have an idea or is it a total mystery?

- Why would Billy end up in the Animal Room?

- What is the mark on Housen's jaw? A scar? Did I miss it in the movie, or is it something you added?

(Billy asked so many interesting questions that are never answered, so I'm asking them for him lmao)

- So, who does Doug curse? Mommy, daddy, or..? What was supposed to be after the "or"??

- How many people experienced Doug? And most importantly, will Billy be lucky enough — or unlucky — to experience him? In one way or another (👀)

- basically, will my two favorite boys kiss in the future?

- Will there be a future?! Are you planning on making another chapter? (If yes, there are obviously questions you don't have to answer to if you don't want to spoil the rest of the story!)

- Stu! What about Stu? Did Stu notice that Billy is gone? Will Billy mention Stu to Doug? Is Stu real, or is Woodsboro just a dream?! Or the other way around, is Doug real or is this all just a nightmare Billy will soon wake up from?!! Will Billy see Stu again?!! Too many questions involving my boy Stu!

I probably have more, but that's already a lot more than I thought- Thank you for answering last time, and I hope you'll have fun with all those new questions, because I sure can read more about this fic for hours without getting bored!

Have an amazing day/night, and thank you for feeding my new hyperfixation!

HELLO HIII!!

I’m very very glad you’ve enjoyed it and have shared it!! I got my Boyfriend to watch Animal Room and we came up with the crackship together, so it’s very special and very dear in my heart. I started it not thinking other people would like it but it’s SOOO much fun chatting with you, Anon!! Now! Questions, list will be in order of the question <3

• how did Billy end up there? Good question. I’d like to say, he somehow was teleported there, him and his ‘family’. So his dad exists here too. Who teleported him and why? No clue for that one, but yeah- the magic of teleportation

• Billy ended up in Animal Room specifically because I wanted him to be able to see Another Matt Lilly character, someone similar to Stu but darker, more in control. Because Doug wouldn’t let Billy be in charge, And I like the idea of Billy losing his control and just not having a good time in any way, shape, or form.

• THE SCAAAAR! That’s something I added. Canonically he does have Eyebrow Scars, but the Jaw scar is something I added that will be talked about In The near future.

• so in the fic, when Billy say “mom? Dad? Or-” and then gets decked [he got punched right? I can’t remember and I wrote it uhhh whoops-] he asks it purely to piss off Doug. He was going to say “Or perhaps it’s both of them.”

Who does Doug curse? In this fic, I’m gonna go with Doug cursed both his parents. This is purely based off the misfits scene when he’s about to sandpaper the ground [teehee ya get it?-], Will be more in depth in the near future

• Who I think have Experienced Doug, Is his little gang and Billy. Now, I would say Billy has somewhat Experienced more of Doug than the others, from the bathroom scene when something flickers across Doug’s face but it’s unreadable. Also, Billy will be experiencing him in more ways than one

• YES! They absolutely will! I need them too, so yes, it’ll happen. Promise

• As soon as I get done with my Animosity Stuilly Fic, I will be Updating The Vexation one, so that will be happening super soon I promise!

• Oh Stu Stu Stu.. I’d imagine in the Scream timeline Stu does notice, but no one else does. It’s like- The only people who’ve taken Notice to Billy’s sudden appearance OR absence, is Doug and Stu. Everyone else seems unphased. Like he’s always been there/been gone.

If Billy were to see Stu again, it would have to be at the very end of the Fic, but I’m gonna play it safe and Say both Doug and Stu are real. Woodsboro is real- it’s all very real.

Im glad you enjoy my writing!! Makes me very happy to hear! Let me know what you think of my answers and as always, I will answer more questions HEHEHFKEBF I like talking about my crackship a lot 🩵‼️

Good day/night Sweet Anon

#billy loomis #scream #scream 1996 #douglas van housen #doug van housen #animal room 1995 #LoomHousen #anon asks #asks #I LOVE THEM LOTS

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oncexinxmyxdreams · 1 year ago

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Encanto OC Event Week 1: Mercedes Reyes

I can't draw at all and read that picrew is okay. Does DollDivine count? 😅

Moodboard for Mercedes. 🎨

Full Name: Mercedes Yarisel Cordova Reyes.

DOB: October 20th, 1899. Died June 26th, 1935.

POB: Bogota, Colombia.

Likes/Hobbies: Painting, long walks, exploring, rock collecting, swimming, dancing, and reading romance novels.

Dislikes: Arguing, being bored, her mother’s dismissiveness and people mistreating others.

MBTI: INFP

Height: Exactly 5 feet tall though she was an inch taller than Bruno at one point.

Hair Color/Style: Dark brown. Mid-back length and no bangs. She'd like changing the hairstyle every day and wear a pretty sunhat when outdoors.

Eye color: Jade green.

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual.

Voice: Zulay Henao.

Positive Traits: Compassionate, loyal, idealistic, easygoing, romantic and a dreamer.

Negative Traits: Self-conscious, overly private and a bit too unrealistic. Is very hard on herself when she fails.

Habits: Nibbles pencils while writing.

Talents: Skilled in watercolor and dancing.

Pets: Two donkeys named Diego and Eliana.

Favorite Food: Arroz de Lisa (rice, vegetables and salted fish, preferably mullet.)

Career: Wanted to be an artist but worked for her in-law's cantina while living in Villavicencio.

Family: Her father, Vicente Cordova, passed away when she was 3. She has very few memories of him. Mother, Maria Reyes, who is controlling and manipulative. Armando Zaragoza became her stepfather when she was 14. She didn't like him at first but got along well with him. Half-sister Desideria was born when she was 15.

Eventually was forced into an arranged marriage with Pablo Salazar. They had twin girls, Francisca and Alejandra. Mercedes became close to her mother-in law Perla, but not with her father-in-law Arturo who's not the most sensitive person.

Backstory: After her dad died, Mercedes moved to different cities with her mom. At some point, they met a group of people who were traveling for new starts. They joined and miraculously arrived to the Encanto! Upon the first day, 10-year-old Mercedes met most of the Madrigals. She was getting used to a new home, but desired to find a library or bookstore. She wanted to find a book to a series she'd almost completed. A couple days after moving, she found one and searched for her book. The only copy she found was being read by a nervous looking boy: Bruno.

I'll save it for the Relationship week, but they were best friends. Some would say soulmates with how well they got along. Mercedes was friends with Julieta and Pepa, but she clicked with Bruno. Even when his reputation became worse and he was mistreated, she remained loyal. Bruno was grateful to her and devastated when she was forced to leave for the arranged marriage. The last time they saw each other, they were almost 20, and sadly, they won't meet again.

The marriage wasn't bad. Pablo had to leave his girlfriend due to the arrangement. He and Mercedes both understood each other's situation which led to respect and empathy. They really liked each other, but there wasn't true love. As a teen, Mercedes had always imagined different scenarios with her true love: exchanging love letters, dancing under starry skies and kiss in the rain. She had to leave the dreams behind, but her twins were the best part of her life.

When the twins were 13, Pablo and Mercedes annulled their marriage realizing they weren't content anymore. (Also Pablo was having an emotional affair.) After that, Mercedes took her daughters to Cali and secretly hoped she'd find the Encanto again. With the movie's timeline, Mercedes already passed away from a severe case of malaria. She was only 35. She left her daughters behind with no other family support. Though she's gone, her story isn't over because her children will find the Encanto and meet the Madrigals.

@encanto-extended-edition

#mercedes reyes #encanto #encanto oc appreciation #encanto oc event #Miracles Come in Pairs #oc #doing one of the twins tomorrow

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topshelfworlds · 9 months ago

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BEYOND THE TABLE: REALITY, THE SECONDARY WORLD, AND THE ROLE OF THE DUNGEON MASTER

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DEFINITIONS

(Primary) Reality – whatever this is, just read some metaphysics or some shit

The Secondary World – the Other Realm, the place beyond Primary Reality bridged by Imagination

The Table – Imagination; the veil of play-space wherein the Secondary World makes contact with Primary Reality

Campaign – an excursion into the Secondary World via Imagination, obfuscated from Primary Reality by the friction between Gameplay, Simulation, and Narrative

adjudication – the process of mitigating friction between Gameplay, Simulation, and Narrative

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My most recent ex all but annihilated me last October with the contents of an amicable text message. Over the previous few months, we’d been slowly repairing our communication enough to plan cat-care responsibilities. By all accounts, it should have been a completely normal interaction following a breakup just finding its footing: she had unearthed index cards encoded with statistics for magic items her character acquired in my since-canceled campaign from among her effects and buried the small-bore offer of their return for my records under discussion of scheduling time for me to see Mr. Kitty.

I fell apart.

Background

The fantasy adventure campaign the cards originated from was easily the most ambitious – and quite possibly most successful – design of any game I’ve constructed in my near-15 years of facilitating TTRPGs: what started as a weekly Thursday meetup running dungeon crawls by the book for some co-workers quickly became a West Marches game with a roster 12–14 players deep across 2 regular play-groups using a hacked-up mish-mash system I built on the fly week-by-week. The scale was magnificent to behold, our hex map slowly blossoming as the players peeled at petals to see what the flower of this mythic land looked like inside. Nearing a year removed from those adventures, I am proud of what we accomplished to this day.

Session was an opportunity to run from the deep problems festering in my relationship; I had just moved into my partner's run-down, dream project home with her & absconded from any deeper thinking about the friction that had been building over the previous year, instead fixating on clear records of narrative timelines, dungeon excursions, side-quests, character relationships, and world events. When I made time for (free) labor around our changing living space, I permitted resentment to simmer: that my passion – being the best facilitator of this emergent fiction I could – was secondary to the dreams of my property-owning partner. When I surprised her with completed projects from her list around the house while she was away, anything less than her utter amazement left a bitter taste in my mouth. I let slip passive-aggressive moans at never having time for the prep work that made me happy, lacking the insight to realize the game was a shield against the loneliness I felt in my relationship.

This was also my then-partner’s third Campaign of mine played in 2 ½ years. A stand out from the start, she rarely took time to understand the game outside of session for her natural ability to process mechanics and draw narrative details from thin air; creative writing and an overachieving academic streak gave her a leg up when attuning to the role she played in the group’s function. Piloting a campy, edge-adjacent build played with deadly seriousness, she worked from the shadows to accomplish her goals, maneuvering the roster’s characters as means to her ends. I was proud of her for this, the scheming and the side-quests and the subtlety, because she was playing the game and well. I could never get over the gnawing feeling that participating in the Campaign wasn’t her desire, though, but that a sense of duty absent of passion for my interests brought her to the Table; like she felt that playing was important because it was my game, and not because she was having a good time. I could never tell if she was having a good time.

When my partner and I separated last April, I disbanded the company of cordial comrades who attentively arrived to each session, oathsworn that our jaunts through The County of Blunderburry in Esterdale would continue at another time; The Secondary World moved and changed even when our minds’ eyes were occupied, I insisted, and each future visit was a promise of new ideas, of change. It wasn’t until months later that I let on to some of the game-regulars the real reason why I called our grand adventure off, well after I had found temporarily stable ground post-life-collapsing-around-me.

Judgment

In the fallout of the breakup and upkeep of coordinating kitty care, I had completely forgotten that she had the cards, physical cues marking her in-game possession of the artifacts statted on them. Rather than answering the inconsequential question raised for me of the cards’ fate, I fell headlong into debilitating anxiety catalyzed by months of emotional turmoil, seeing past the oversight in my facilitation to the now-painful memories of hours spent at the table reaching into the Secondary World with her. My binder stuffed with dog-eared notes chronicling the escapades of the roster had gone untouched in months for the same reason; confronting the hurt inside those records of her achievements in my game was something I was not ready to bear.

I agonized over the “right” answer to her offer, begging myself to conjure something satisfactory to my principles. The way I understood the scenario, there were 2 outcomes:

• I take the cards

• She keeps the cards

These outcomes were further layered by the intentions associated with the choice:

• I take the cards...

… because they are sentimental to me … because unique items should not have duplicates … because I did not want her to throw them out

• She keeps the cards...

… because I want her to deal with them … because their existence is painful to me … because… because…

I had very little to lose, and I knew it: the items’ information – two magic swords with dragon-slaying enchantments – had been recorded in my binder upon their looting, reducing any stakes of the outcome to whether it would keep me up at night. People-pleasing tendencies reared reliably thrashing maws at my principles, insisting through self-sabotage that my only priority was to act without spite or resentment. I was frozen by this weightless decision resting on my dignity.

So I hit the copium: rather than address this unsettling quandary as the most authentic version of myself, I reached into the depths of my Imaginary Costume Chest and procured the garb of the Dungeon Master. What would the ideal facilitator do? How would they deliberate over such a low-stakes scenario, charged as it was with emotionality? I quickly found my answer and transformed through its adjudication.

Experience dictates that enlightenment is not a once-and-for-all type deal, Siddhartha wasting away under the fig tree until perfection, weary from resistance, unravels forever. Rather, it is a series of accumulations, moments that shriek across the sky of inner sight, arriving unexpectedly and leaving as soon as you look away. In that moment, seeing through the eyes of the Dungeon Master, the Secondary World was there. The Table rose before me, and from ego-differed I saw what was due: that the fate of the cards should be decided by the player of the character possessing them, regardless of personal desire for the physical symbols. The player-character position of possession is weighty in classical adventure games; treasure is a promise of the play-style, the payout for characters bought into designs of Dungeons, Demi-Hells, and Derelicht Halls. The Truth of the Secondary World hinged on this adjudication: that – no matter what interpretation of the items’ possession I could enforce in later chronicles – the fate of their simulacrum in Reality must be decided by the equivalent representative of their possessor in the Other Realm. Any other choice was a dishonest attempt to twist the Secondary World around my selfish desire for power in Primary Reality.

Erudition

Who gives a shit, though, right? So much emotional effort spent just to decide the fate of some dingy 2x3 index cards pedantically recorded months before. Even still, I returned to the decision again and again, feeling a familiar truth that had evaded my comprehension for more than a decade of facilitation finally coming into focus. In therapy sessions following the breakup, I had confided doubts of my motivations for running games amidst shifting insecurities and self-loathing: that I used table time not as a thought-experiment I longed to leverage against those weaker parts of myself but as abolition of my responsibility to Primary Reality, to my obligations and concerns of a better life for myself and those around me. I doubted my practice, this steadfast duty to my happiness, in fear that it caused the crumbling of my relationship, rather than the tension and mistrust obviously sign-posted in shrinking gaps the farther down the road our time together traveled.

Cloaked in adjudication, I found sublimity. I was free from expectations of self-importance and righteous grandiosity, unshackled from my self-imposed totalitarian responsibility to be anything other than a conduit for the Truth of the Secondary World. My weakness was leveraged against the fulcrum of objective judgement. Removing my ego from the equation, I found peace in the Dungeon Master’s decision.

This epiphany is my remaking, an affirmation of my long-held belief in the practice of officiating the movements of the Secondary World; when we gaze into the Other Realm to see what could be, we are afforded the grace to think beyond our compromised persona in Reality to the idealization of our selves. The Dungeon Master’s thankless role is to give what is due the actions of those who brave the dangerous truths inside the Secondary World, moving and changing as it is even when our minds’ eyes are occupied; becoming this conduit, the Dungeon Master is anointed in acceptance of the truths they must bear. For me, just this is it: the idealization of my highest self is purest acceptance, and each orracular excursion across the Table and into the Beyond is an exercise in that action. With hope, I gaze into wonder and oblivion, knowing that the Secondary World is only just outside the scope of reality by the width of a dreamspan.

I sent her a reply with thanks for the consideration. In the post-apocalypse of my anxious breakdown, I coincidentally put my current game on hiatus for the season; sabbatical was spent compulsively plumbing the depths of myself for changes the Dungeon Master has imparted to me with years of practice. Any ttrpg player with some experience can describe at least one moment when the line between themselves and their character blur, the bounds between the Primary self and the soul on the Table becoming too small to sense. These event horizons eclipse the light of our egos, and in the cold shadow we learn where our silhouette overlaps with our characters’. Is the Dungeon Master a projection of my inner landscape, disappearing with ego death? An archetype of acceptance to aspire to, standing parallel to me in the shadow? Only a lifetime can tell.

#d&d #role playing game #rpg #ttrpg #ttrpg community #dungeon master

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jerzwriter · 2 years ago

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A Little Detour: The Elopement

Book: Open Heart (Post Series Timeline)

Pairing: Tobias Carrick x F!MC (Casey MacTavish)

Rating: Teen

Category: Fluff

Summary: With their planned wedding less than a month away, they hop on a flight to Vegas to make it legal.... all by themselves.

Words: 3100

A/N: Relax, Vivian… they're still going to have the big(ish) Boston wedding as planned as soon as this stupid writer finishes it, but they’re not waiting any longer, and they’re doing things their way. It's so much fun thinking of them having this special day, and this sweet secret to share. I am finishing up the Boston wedding fic now. I hope you won't be bored reading about two weddings so close together, but it's how I imagine it happening for them. The best of both worlds, this private little treasure for them, then professing their love and joining their families in front of the people most dear to them. I hope you enjoy it! @choices-november2022 - Day 10 - Dreams come true. @choicesflashfics - "That's a little melodramatic, don't you think?" More on their elopement here. Casey & Tobias Wedding & Baby Stories Casey & Tobias Masterlist Full Masterlist

Casey was awakened by the same soft humming noise that lulled her to sleep hours before. Comfortably nuzzled in her fiance’s arms, waking up was the last thing she wanted to do. Snuggling closer, her content smile widened when she felt a tender kiss on her temple. Everything was right with the world. Until another bout of nausea hit.

She woke up in a flash and was startled by the unfamiliar surroundings. Where was she? Was this… a plane? Bewildered, she assumed it was a dream, then memories of the past few hours came flooding back.

“So. Let’s do it!” “Do what?” “Run away and get married!”

He insisted she call her OB-GYN to make sure flying was safe. Being doctors themselves, they both knew the answer already, but he refused to make plans until she did. With permission granted, she began packing as he attempted to get them out of work for a couple of days. She was closing her suitcase when Tobias returned to their bedroom, the smile on his face giving the answer away, but she still had to ask.

“Ethan agreed? He’s letting us take time off?”| “He most certainly is.” “You told him why,” she accused. “Didn’t you?” “No! I just told him it was important and that we needed the time. He was understanding.” “That’s it?” “That’s it.” “I can’t believe it,” she said, dumbfounded. “This is because of me. He likes me. You… you may have patched up your friendship, but he still finds you a bit conceited and annoying at times. I know it! He wouldn’t do this for you.” “What a ringing endorsement, future wife,” he laughed. “You realize you’re marrying me within the next 24 hours. Right?” Her face lit up with all the excitement of a child seeing their presents under the tree on Christmas morning. “I’m going to marry you,” she squealed, rushing into his waiting arms. “We’re getting married!”

And that’s why she was on the plane.

“What are you doing up,” Tobias asked. “You need more sleep.”

“How am I supposed to sleep?” she beamed. “It’s my wedding day!”

“It sure is!”

“So, what happens when we get there? Is Elivs going to marry us? Please tell me Elvis isn’t going to marry us.”

“Will you back out if I say he is?” Tobias chuckled.

“No way! It just wouldn’t be my first choice.”

“Mine either. Don’t worry. I’ve been working on the arrangements, and while we’re going to Vegas, we’re still going to be classy.”

“How are you putting this together so quickly? I mean, it’s been less than four hours since we decided to do this!”

His eyes gleamed as his lips twisted into a smirk. “I know a guy.”

“You always know a guy,” she laughed.

“It’s part of my charm! But this is the definition of stress-free! When we get there, you’ll have a personal shopper to help you pick out a dress. Tiffany’s is right in the Bellagio. Unfortunately, they’ll be closed when we arrive, but a selection of rings will be sent to our suite, so we can pick them out.”

“You really thought this all out, didn’t you?”

“Do you know who my mother is?” he laughed. “I know how to put an event together in a hot minute.”

“Speaking of your mother… our mothers… if they find out we’re doing this, they may actually kill us.”

“That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?”

“No,” she smiled. “Not really.”

“Trust me, you’re safe… at least until the baby is born. But this is our little secret, and no one else will know about the wedding before the wedding.”

“I’ll be with them all day for a dress fitting on Saturday. Hopefully, I won’t let it slip. Speaking of dresses, I have the prettiest gown picked out for the wedding. So, do you mind if I’m a little less traditional for today?”

“Baby, you can get whatever you want.”

“Good! Because I want something a little sexy,” her smile faltered, and she rubbed her belly. “God knows when I’ll start showing, and then….”

“Hey! I hope you’re not being serious. I can’t wait for you to start showing. I promise you, I won’t be able to keep my paws off you.”

“And that’s exactly how we got here, Dr. Carrick.”

“Really?” he chuckled. “If I remember correctly, the boudoir shoot you did got us here.”

“It may have played a role….”

“But seriously, Case. Don’t feel you have to get some hot dress to prove something. I’m about to have the hottest wife in the history of wives. You’ve got nothing to prove here.”

“Tobias. You realize you’re trying to convince me to not get a sexy dress.”

A puff of air shot from his mouth as he shook his head in amusement.

“You’re right. I’m an idiot. Don’t listen to me!”

The remainder of the flight was spent kissing, cuddling, and gushing over each other. On occasion, Tobias would kiss Casey’s belly and tell their little one about Mommy & Daddy’s plans for the day. Casey stroked his hair as she watched him, attempting to commit every second to memory; because she knew life would rarely be better than this.

A limousine was waiting to whisk them to the Bellagio when they landed. There, Tobias introduced Casey to Jonathan, his “guy” in Vegas. They were classmates at Howard, and now he was a manager at the luxurious resort. Casey found him as delightful and charming as her fiance and told him she could only imagine the antics they must have gotten into together.

“I assure you, such antics are in the distant past,” he grinned. “I’m delighted to meet the woman taking Tobias Carrick off the market! I wasn’t sure such a unicorn existed! But now that I’ve met you I understand.”

“Stop with the flattery, Jon,” Tobias teased. “She’s taken; go find someone of your own!”

“I’m well aware,” Jonathan said with a pat on his friend’s back. “But such a rare creature deserves a beautiful wedding, and I’ll see to it that she has one. Honesty, I’m shocked your mother isn’t doing that.”

“Oh, she is,” Tobias assured.

“We’re getting married in Boston next month,” Casey explained. “This is just our pre-game.”

“Well, now I’m nervous. I’m sure I can’t hold a candle to Vivian Carrick.”

“Yeah,” Tobias laughed, “and I’m sure you won’t be as big a pain in the ass either.”

They bid Jonathan farewell and headed to their suite. Intoxicatingly in love, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other as Tobias fumbled with the keycard. The fragrant aroma from dozens of roses in their suite filled their senses the moment he got it open. Casey was about to comment when she was literally swept off her feet.

“Tobias!” She laughed heartily as he carried her through the door. “Isn’t the tradition for you to carry me over the threshold after we’re married?”

“Yeah, but it’s also tradition to get married, then get pregnant,” he smiled as he placed her down on a table near the entrance. His lips fell to her neck, brushing soft, sensuous kisses down her shoulder, over her collarbone, then he faced her again. “But we’re not exactly traditional, are we?”

Casey gently shook her head with a coy grin. “No, we’re not,” she cooed. “So it’s acceptable if we have the wedding night before the wedding then, right?”

“You won’t get any arguments from me,” he growled, capturing her lips in his again… when the bell rang.

Casey threw her head back with a groan as Tobias’s face fell to her shoulder, muttering a multitude of curses under his breath.

“Who is it?” Tobias barked.

“It’s Jonathan. I have wedding bands for you to look at.”

Tobias playfully glimpsed at his soon-to-be wife. “I suppose we do have to do this.”

“Yes,” she pressed a kiss to his forehead. “We’ll just have to have the wedding night later.”

They sipped sparkling water as they selected their rings inside their luxury suite. Tobias nixed the offer of champagne; if Casey couldn’t have it, neither could he. After selecting two simple platinum bands, he asked to have them engraved with “My end and my beginning” from their wedding song, their initials, and today’s date inside the rings.

“Today’s date?” Casey asked. “This is supposed to be a secret?”

“You know me,” he smiled. “I enjoy a little risk.”

He didn’t want to let Casey go when her personal shopper arrived, only relenting when Jonathan reminded him the next time he saw her, she’d be dressed and ready to marry him. They both felt their hearts flutter. This was really happening! Tobias had no need to shop, his favorite tux was already in the closet, but he set off on a mission of his own.

Casey selected a pale pink and grey fitted dress that accentuated every asset, especially her pregnancy boobs. Tobias would be thrilled. She returned to the suite where a hair and makeup stylist tended to her in one bedroom while Tobias dressed in another. Then, it was time.

They opted not to have a photographer capture their first look, insisting this moment needed to be theirs and theirs alone. After being guided to the softly lit main room, the staff exited the suite. The couple remained, standing back to back, each of their hearts racing. Without turning around, Tobias reached for Casey’s hands.

“So, this is it, princess. Are you ready?”

“I am,” she smiled, her body trembling as emotions overtook her. “Are you?”

“I am, but I’ll admit, I’m a little scared.”

Her face fell for but a moment when she asked why.

“I’m afraid you’re gonna turn around and realize you could do a lot better than this old man… but for the record… I’m so glad you chose me.”

“Oh, Tobias,” she sighed. “It could never be anyone but you. I love you. I love you so much.”

His face lit up as he slowly exhaled. “I love you, Casey. More than I ever thought I could.”

“So,” she giggled. “Are we supposed to turn around at some point?”

“I guess we should,” he smiled, then on the count of three, while only releasing one hand, they turned to face each other.

Tobias gasped when he saw her, and she leaned into his hand as he stroked her cheek.

“You’ve never looked more beautiful,” his voice cracked, “and that’s saying a lot.”

Casey smoothed out his lapels with a smile. “You look quite handsome yourself,” she said as a tear gently rolled from her eye. “I can’t believe you’re my old man.”

After looking each other over once more, they silently embraced for what felt like an eternity, neither wishing to let go. Finally, Tobias broke the spell.

“You know, as lovely as this is, it’s not going to get us married. But,” he said, walking to a side table, “You need one more thing before we go.”

He handed her a small bouquet of flowers he picked up while she was shopping. Casey ran her fingers delicately over the white calla lilies, tulips, and roses, then lifted them to her nose and inhaled.

“They’re beautiful.”

“Can’t have my bride getting married without a bouquet.”

“Now, all that’s left to do is get married.”

Tobias offered her an arm, “I couldn’t have said it better myself. Shall we?”

Even in a place with as much sparkle and light as Vegas, the happy couple stood out, garnering stares and whispers as they walked to the chapel. But they didn’t notice, and their eyes were only for each other. When they entered the small, elegant chapel, they were surprised to see that Jonathan himself would be performing the ceremony.

“You think I’m leaving this to chance?” he grinned.

Besides a small anecdote about Tobias during his college years and a brief ode to his beautiful bride, Jonathan didn’t stray from the simple ceremony the couple requested. After I do’s were exchanged and rings were placed on each other’s fingers, the beaming couple was waiting on the pronouncement when Tobias spontaneously asked to speak.

“Oh, you can’t back out now, buster,” Casey ribbed. “We’ve already said I do! You’re stuck with me.”

“And that’s exactly where I want to be,” he laughed before turning serious again. “I just want to say one thing before this gets the final stamp of approval. I never imagined this life for myself, but you changed everything. I had no idea the beautiful woman that walked into that deli one morning would turn my life upside down in the most magical way. Now, I can’t imagine a life without you. Casey, you are the best thing I never planned, and I thank God for you every day. And I needed to say that before this clown pronounces us husband and wife. I love you, Casey MacTavish. With all my heart.”

“Tobias,” she whispered through tears, gently brushing one away from his cheek. “I love you so much, and I’m just as grateful for you. But let’s allow this man to finish because I never want to hear you call me Casey MacTavish again. I’m more than ready to be Mrs. Carrick to you, buddy,” she beamed.

“Wait…” he blurted, his eyes wide. “You what? You’re changing your name? You… you want to be among the crazy Carricks?”

“Well, I’m marrying you,” she laughed. “And I’m having your baby, so I think I’m part of the family regardless.”

He reached out and held her close against his chest, “You most certainly are,” he gasped, kissing her forehead.

“Wait!” Jonathan interrupted, “I haven’t said you may kiss the bride yet… Tobias, don’t make me invalidate this whole thing.”

“You wouldn’t dare!” Tobias teased, “Go ahead, Jon, work your magic… make this official.”

“With pleasure. By the power vested in me by the State of Nevada, I pronounce you husband and wife. Now, you may kiss your bride.”

“With pleasure,” Tobias grinned. Their lips met in a way they had never felt before, filled with fire and bright passion, yet, tender and full of love neither could adequately describe. It belonged to them, it was theirs, and now they were united together as one. The rest of the world turned dark… only three things existed… Tobias, Casey, and their baby-to-be. And just as Casey had stated in their bedroom less than twenty-four hours ago, that was all that mattered.

If anyone was watching the hallway that led to their suite, they would have found a repeat performance from earlier that day. While their clothing was fancier, and the smiles on their faces somehow even brighter, they still couldn’t keep their hands off each other. After fumbling to open the door, he once again swept his beautiful bride off her feet, eliciting another flurry of giggles.

“This time, it’s legit!” she teased as he carried her through the door.

“And this time, we are having our wedding night… Mrs. Carrick.”

She’d never forget the wonder on his face as he placed her down gently on the couch, his eyes full of love as he smiled. “Mrs. Carrick,” he whispered. “We did it. We’re married.”

“You’re all mine,” she grinned, holding him close.

“I always have been.”

One kiss turned into another, and Casey began to remove his tie, then his jacket, as things turned more passionate. She reached back, about to unzip her dress, when he stopped her.

“Wait…” he said, pulling away. “I had sparkling cider delivered. Let’s toast before we consummate this thing,” he winked. “Shall we?”

“Works for me,” she purred, “just make it quick. I bought something cute to put on for you tonight, and I’m dying to show it off.”

“Well damn,” he said, pouring two glasses, “then we better gulp this down.”

He lifted a glass to his nose and grimaced. “This isn’t cider. It’s champagne.”

“It’s fine, baby,” Casey assured, “I could take just a sip. It won’t hurt.”

“Oh, no. First, I’m allowed to be a paranoid dad-to-be, so I say no. Second, I’m sure there would be seismic activity in Boston the second your lips touched the glass. Ramsey, who would somehow be summonsed, show up here and ruin our night.”

“I think that’s a little far-fetched,” she laughed, getting more comfortable on the couch. “But if it will make you feel better, we can skip the toast. Just come here.”

But Tobias was already on the phone with room service.

“What happened?” Casey asked.

“They won’t be able to get it here for at least forty minutes. But, if I head to the lobby, I can pick up a chilled bottle right now.”

“If it will make you happy, then go. It’ll give me time to change into my little… and I do mean little … surprise for you.”

He let out a soft growl as he pulled her near. “Now that makes me more than anxious to get back to you, Mrs. Carrick.”

“I love the sound of that,” she swooned. “I’ll be waiting impatiently, Mr. Carrick.”

Tobias bolted out the door, and Casey let out a little squeal. Overcome with joy, she spun around the room before taking off her dress and slipping into the delicately embroidered pink lingerie she had purchased earlier in the day. Tousling her hair and touching up her makeup in the bathroom mirror, she smiled. Not only was she madly in love, but she loved what she saw looking back at her, including the newly discovered pooch in her belly. Rubbing it gently with a smile, she never felt more beautiful. Tobias was right; she had nothing to worry about.

She hopped onto the bed, sprawling out atop the plush comforter in a seductive pose, eager to greet her new husband. She laughed to herself when she wondered if they’d even get to the toast. One look at her, and she was sure he’d forget all about it.

The door creaked open, and Tobias appeared, carrying the sparkling cider like a trophy won in battle.

“I got it, very last one,” he bragged before stopping in his tracks. He thought she had never looked more beautiful earlier that night, but looking at her now, she had proven him wrong. Never mind speechless; he was breathless.

Slowly walking to the bed, he sat down gently, careful not to wake her. He grabbed a blanket to cover her, undressed and slipped beneath it himself. Holding her gently in his arms, one hand resting atop her belly, he whispered.

“I love you, Casey. Happy first night as my wife.”

He fell asleep beside her with a smile on his lips. This was their wedding night, not at all as they would have imagined it. But it was him, Casey, and their little one-to-be; nothing else was needed, and it couldn’t have been more perfect.

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

#open heart fanfic #tobias carrick #tobias carrick x mc #tobias x casey #choices fanfic #wedding take one #the elopement #baby & wedding stories

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nameless-brand · 10 months ago

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When I decided to return to what was previously the Nameless City, it was to figure out whether the Subway Dungeon / Cerulean Labyrinth still existed. I haven't sensed hide nor hair of it since the timeline rearranged itself, but I had to be sure. I didn't want to have any loose ends when it came to dealing with the Dream.

Unfortunately, a rich billionaire who never existed in the prior timeline had decided to make their giant tower at where the Subway Dungeon's heart was. I didn't feel anything though - no strange anomalous subway entrances or rumor phenomenon. Really, the most annoying thing I experienced was the superhero and supervillain shenanigans. I had thought the Subway Dungeon simply was never created, given how the Dream was banished at the very start.

And the billionaire just happened to decide to prove me wrong. Apparently, his company has been researching into the Dungeon. I couldn't sense it because they encased that entire region in Nihil metal, which only comes from the dungeon. Or I guess a BC if they're feeling bored.

Levant mentioned about Hollow/People Dungeons early on, Dungeons that are created when a Dreamer loses all hope and their body for whatever reason loses its soul. The body becomes a Husk, a shell that becomes the foundation of a Hollow dungeon. The point of a Hollow Dungeon is to consume, an endless hunger that is highly lethal for anyone that is part of the supernatural. Normal people only get affected once the Hollow Dungeon reaches criticality.

I've always suspected the Subway Dungeon is a Hollow Dungeon that reached criticality, ever since Lev described it to me and based on my personal experience. An eternal wound that bridges fantasy and reality, created when the goddess lost her soul and left behind her eternal vessel, a husk. As for the identity of that vessel, if you know, you know.

Given that the Templar god didn't get murked this time around, I didn't think the Subway Dungeon existed, but I wanted to make sure. Not to mention I had good memories of the city, and when Lev came back, I'd imagine there was no other place she wanted to be.

I guess I'm just musing about it now because it's confirmed that the Subway Dungeon finally broke containment. Lev stated she can enter it through the Diamond District Subway Entrance. It probably won't be long before it spreads further.

I don't even know what's going to happen from here on out. Happy New Year, I guess.

#posting || ic

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blocksruinedme · 2 years ago

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12. and 18?

Author's Behind the Scenes Question: List here! Asks open

12) Is there a trope you haven’t written yet but really want to?

Time Travel! One of the prompts for #smallethoweek is a favorite trope, and i instantly started planning out a time travel fic and realized it would be something like 20k. I adore time travel, but it's hard to get write, and if I do it I want to do it thoroughly. Another fave is memory fuckage, but I've got that in unpublished wips, though it's all specifically "remembering other series". I did come up with an idea for #smallethoweek with much more simple amnesia, we'll see.

18) What is a line/scene you’re really proud of? Give us the DVD commentary for that scene.

This is why this ask took so long. Went with the beginning fight of the first mcyt fic I wrote: MY EX STOLE MY SOULMATE.. | Empires SMP S2 1.19

some quotes

“You gave up the right to have me care about what you think of me when you fired me, without even talking to me! Just decided everything we’d done together was nothing, that everything I’d done for you didn’t matter. You are corrupt! I’m looking out for the best interests of everyone here, with someone like you claiming to have authority over them. It’s not about you, Jimmy! We’re happy here in Gobland, and you’re not part of this and no one needs you, so get out of here before I kill you again.”

“You’re not happy! Stop lying! You’re using him! This is all literally because you found out what we are, what we’d had, and you actually couldn’t handle it! Couldn’t handle that I’d had something good without you! Couldn’t let me have that again! I don’t care if you imagine you’re happy, but he deserves better, so much better than you.”

[skipping a head a bit]

“Jimmy, he’s a fucking adult, he can do whatever he wants. I’m not holding him captive in a cage. I offered him a job that he loves and is very good at. What would he do with you, raise some fucking cows? Try and make your town less boring? Pick up after you and all your messes, like I did? Try to keep you from flying off and doing idiotic things, try to keep you safe from your own issues, try to get you to grow up and actually respect yourself and everyone else? He’s happy, and I want him here, he’s amazing and there’s really no way you could appreciate him like I do.”

Here's the commentary!

- I wrote this fic in <12 hours and published it immediately. It was the first mcyt fic I published. There's a detailed timeline somewhere in this blog. It was a fever dream

- Since the fwhimmy breakup I had been wanting to write a reconciliation fic. I'd read a post by @umbrify that gave me a headcanon of what was going on, and I wanted to use that to get them back together... well, even more together that before. I kept poking at a fic, but I fundamentally couldn't get them to talk in a productive way.

- The morning the crossover dropped, I watched several episodes, I screamed, I thought things. All day long thoughts brewed. At 5pm I was walking to my car and messaging @toasted-cricket and realized I could use their relationships with Tango to drag them back together. I genuinely wondered if that was part of why Tango went to Gobland, to help the creators get through this conflict that was maybe kind of dragging.

- 10 minutes later I was on my couch and wrote without stopping for I think three hours, then on and off until I published a bit after midnight. Unlike most of my writing, I didn't do a formal outline, and I didn't leave placeholders for finding better words or doing more dialogue, it all just flowed out of me like I was possessed. Finally I could make fWhip and Jimmy say what they felt! I was so deeply relieved to get it out of them, to have a world where it resolves, because there is a horrific lack of s2 fwhimmy fic!!!

- I felt good about the scene and the fic as a whole. I wasn't sure how to tag it, it wasn't *that* angsty, right? They got to resolving it quickly, is this even angst? hot damn I was wrong. I got comments the next day about how it was brutal, and in one response I said " I was so possessed as I wrote it I didn't even realize how brutal it was, just the truth flowing out. :)". I kind of cheated in this fic by not having them really address the issues, just say them. And then I wrote a sequel about weeks passing without any detailed discussion, which i still need to finish.

- For reasons I don't understand, this is my most popular fic, 3x the kudos of the next. At first I assumed it was the novelty of being a zero day ship, but the ship didn't get much more content so I expected it to drop off. I guess this means it's better than I thought? Or maybe I truly was possessed by a muse who Had Something To Say. Hopefully they'll come back for more fic. :)

here's more of that scene under the cut

It was even harder to keep track of time in the cave than at home, so far from the sun. Tango didn’t know if it was anything approximating dinner time, but he defaulted to calling meals “dinner” and went off in search of it. As he came to the main level, he heard voices from one of the buildings. Tango was about to call out when he realized the voices sounded upset, so he kept his mouth shut as he approached.

“--I haven’t done anything wrong, I certainly haven’t broken any of your so-called ‘laws’ that you don’t even follow.”

fWhip sounded defensive and angry. Awkward! Maybe Tango shouldn’t say hi after all.

The voice that responded was so angry, so cold and so hard that it took Tango a moment to recognize it at all.

“There are things that are wrong that aren’t in the laws. You know that. Things like basic human decency.”

“Hey I’m a gob–”

“Shut up, fWhip.”

fWhip shut up. Tango was pretty sure most people who knew him would shut up if they heard Jimmy sound like that, it was so unnatural and upsetting. What the hell had fWhip done to make Jimmy sound like this?

Tango guessed Jimmy was waiting to make sure fWhip was going to stay shut up. Maybe he was moving around, maybe he was staring at fWhip, maybe he was staring off in another direction. It was frustrating to not be able to see what was going on, but bursting in seemed very… unwise.

When Jimmy resumed, his voice was still deadly serious, but a bit less disturbing. “I’m going to talk now. Do not interrupt me.”

There was a pause. Maybe there was a nod from fWhip, or maybe a refusal to say or indicate anything.

Jimmy spoke clearly and deliberately. Had he practiced this speech? Maybe, this really wasn’t what Jimmy normally sounded like.

“I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to hurt me. You insult me, you have a whole campaign of trying to get people to disrespect me, you try to ruin my career, and now this. I know why you’re doing this, and it’s literally unbelievable. You’re really something else. I can’t believe we were ever… anything to each other. Give it up. Stop pulling other people into your stupid revenge plot. I’m the one who got killed, over and over, I’m the one who got a warden in his base. You’re not the victim, fWhip!”

Aww fuck. This sounded bad. Very very bad. Tango had picked up that fWhip was part of the whole “Jimmy is a toy” game, but he thought it was a friendly running joke. Oops?

It didn’t take long for fWhip to respond. “Are you done with your little speech, Sheriff? Do you want a little round of applause for your performance?”

Tango heard the most sarcastic applause he’d ever heard, and he hung out with Cleo. fWhip’s voice was cold and low, and he was straight up sneering. Tango had only known him for a few… for however long he’d been here, but he’d never heard him sound anything like this. What the fuck was going on?

“Well that’s all well and good, but I don’t care what you think is going on, I don’t care what you think about anything. No matter what you think, the whole server doesn’t revolve around you, Jimmy. We have our own lives and emotions and... and everything.”

fWhip faltered for a moment, but continued on. Less cold and sarcastic, more angry.

Oh fuck. Tango headed towards the door, hoping he could stop an actual murder.

Jimmy exploded at fWhip. Tango had heard him angry before, with all the shit that went down on Double Life, but this was something else, something much more… personal?

Tango froze just outside the door as soon as he heard “him.” What?

Meanwhile fWhip was almost shouting. “What better, you? Sheriff? You’ve ignored him since you got here!”

“That’s because you literally stole him, to-- to turn him against me! To put him in your weird cave and, and, make him forget about the sun! Everything is weird now! You can’t stand that I actually had someone who made me happy, that I had a partnership that worked, someone who would never betray me, unlike half the people on that server treated their partners. We’re real soulmates. What Tango and I had was actually so special, and you’ve never had anything like that, so you took him away from me!”

fWhip was now actually shouting. Jimmy kept trying to interrupt him, but he just kept going. “Jimmy, he’s a fucking adult, he can do whatever he wants. I’m not holding him captive in a cage. I offered him a job that he loves and is very good at. What would he do with you, raise some fucking cows? Try and make your town less boring? Pick up after you and all your messes, like I did? Try to keep you from flying off and doing idiotic things, try to keep you safe from your own issues, try to get you to grow up and actually respect yourself and everyone else? He’s happy, and I want him here, he’s amazing and there’s really no way you could appreciate him like I do.”

Tango unfroze and headed to the door, even though he desperately wanted to run away from all this. He heard movement inside as he reached the door.

“Get out and don’t you ever come back.”

Jimmy and Tango’s heads swung towards the door alarmingly fast as Tango walked in.

“Gentlemen, gentlemen, please, I’m sure there’s enough of me to go around.”

Tango forced his voice to be as casual and humorous as possible, forced himself to smile like he wasn’t walking in on a potential murder, about… him?? It was a gambit, but Tango had no idea how to approach this besides humor, and he really wanted this fight to stop.

#me #answering asks #my writing

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chiveburger · 4 months ago

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[I'm sorry about that long-ass ask, but I saw your post and I'm bored and my adhd's kicking in and my brain has thoughts apparently. You're welcome to throw this in the trash ! (i didn't even proofread, so yeah i'm sorry)]

What you said about jixing in as beautiful as you is interesting because unlike you, I totally get where the boyfriend is coming from.

First, in their relationship, she almost exclusively the taker, rarely the giver (no physical affection except for a hug here and there, no acts of service, no quality time -she tried, but something more important came up, or it was with friends-, no words of affirmation, almost no communication -I think in the beginning, he's always the one calling her-...). To me, that felt really unbalanced.

That unbalance makes it easy to see their relationship from his point of view : he loves her so much that he proposes, but at the same time (I'm assuming here that the timeline of the first 8 episodes stretches over ~7-10 months. It's never explicited, but jixing said she would have enough money for a few months at the beginning of the startup and it makes the "struggling to find investors" storyline more realistic), he comes to realize that she doesn't seem to 1) love him as much as he loves her, 2) prioritize other things like her business and 3) most importantly, doesn't want the future he wants.

I think he made a very mature decision : he saw that their paths were diverging, and chose to be true to what he wanted (a chill family life) and what she wanted (a thriving business) and let their relationship go.

The """flaw""", if there is one, lies with jixing here I think :

She prioritizes work and knows that she is doing it, but she doesn't realize the impact it has on her relationship because she never really checks (saying "wait for me" and nothing else, no conversations, no "how's your life going?"..., feels dismissive. Imagine if the genders were reversed : we would feel bad for the girl and tell her to leave him because her partner doesn't care about her)

It's not even really "work" that she prioritizes : it's her dream of "helping people" through technology, science, and medicine - her dream isn't a house with him, not really, not anymore. She's not trying to make money, she's not trying to buy a house, she wants to make robots and code stuff and create something. Perfectly valid, but she prioritizes her own dream over their shared dream and that's why he breaks up. I think by the time they break up, she has not herself noticed that her own priorities have shifted : if she had been more introspective, she would have realized it and the breakup would have been mutual. Sad, but mutual.

I do believe she loves him, in her way. Her way is not enough for him and that's OK (again, lack of care, of time, of everything he emotionally needs in a partner), but, again, she does not realize this because she doesn't communicate (not because of lack of skills, but because she does not realize communication is needed : she is so deeply set in her couple routine -i love him, he loves me, everything's a-ok, that she can't fathom the idea that anything might be wrong in their couple). On this, he also doesn't communicate much, but he's a bit better at it and I'll give him a pass because he's already making choices around ep 5-6, even though he proposes (if anything, that's what he did wrong because he already had doubts by then, but it felt, on his part, like a last-ditch grand gesture which came crashing down the moment she said "maybe" instead of "yes").

In conclusion, they don't want the same things in life (a perfectly normal thing that happens to a lot of couples), but she never realizes it, because she never seems to think about her relationship, where it's going, how it's doing, what her boyfriend is feeling... To me as the viewer, she just doesn't seem to care and I believe that's where we get her main character flaw : lack of introspection.

Jixing is a woman that "goes with the flow", mostly. But, professionally and personally, she needs a push to actually do things : 1) when she was unsure of her professional future (valid, same), she relied on han ting's advice most of all to make a choice and didn't choose "alone" (that fine, but in context, i think it supports my point : making such a choice required introspection and she was having trouble with it) 2) when her boyfriend proposed, she was blindsided, even though their relationship was smooth-sailing. It's explained away because her financial situation isn't stable, but if she had done more thinking about her situation, it wouldn't have seemed so crazy that her boyfriend would try to stabilize that same situation by marrying her and giving her a security net. 3) i hate to say it, but I would have been out looking for a job the minute i heard my boss had lied and had no intention of promoting me -it took sexual assault and days (weeks?) of subsequent workplace harassment to make her quit (fuck corporate workplace culture). Resilience is usually a character strength, but damn. She was the personification of sunk cost fallacy for a few episodes there, and that stems also from her lack of introspection : unless she is forced to by exterior circumstances (han ting, heaven bless his people skills, even though he tried to use them for selfish reasons, the breakup, the sexual assault), she wont think about what she needs and what she wants.

((Her lack of introspection (in addition to her somewhat undue confidence in her skills as boss of her own startup at the beginning) is the most interesting thing about her - I think, anyway.))

Anyway, the difference between jixing and her boyfriend is that the boyfriend thinks about their relationship (we see him do so several times), but that she never does. And the boyfriend chooses to break up because he sees all the things that she doesn't (because he's looking and she's not) and realizes that, if they stay together, one of them will always be miserable, no matter how much they love each other. It doesn't matter how much he loves her : she's not looking forward to the life he dreams of, and he doesn't want the life she's running towards.

I think breaking up was the most mature and considerate and loving thing he could have done.

On episode 9 : the fact that she went up to his flat with the contract and the money only just made him more convinced he made the right choice - Seven Tan did the delusional and desperate smile so well it was glorious and tragic I love her so much.

Also, the fact that the first thing she did was look for signs of infidelity instead of asking questions is so fucked up. But also the last sign we're getting that they are very much NOT on the same page in their relationship.

I hope this character flaw (her lack of introspection, especially when it comes to relationships) is going to be a plot point in the future and in her next relationship because, apart from her mix of confidence, resilience and naivete, that's the most interesting thing about her. I trust 7Tan to play it, but I never trust the writers.

[again, sorry for the wall of text, I got bored... This is not a rebuttal or me starting an argument or anything, I swear ! I just had thoughts. Also, I said "the boyfriend" the whole way through because I don't remember his name and I can't be bothered to check

Anyway, I hope you have a brilliant morning / day / lunch / evening / night]

omg don't be sorry, but I also didn't think anybody would read my analysis of the show because nobody ever watches the same chinese dramas as me at the same time 🫠 I'll be honest I agree with you like I do think yichen was mature enough to step away from a relationship where he wasn't being fulfilled. part of me feels like it's a shame though because it was a four year long relationship who's end goal was marriage and a life together. on jixing's part she's been very oblivious to the problems and their mutual needs, but if I were yichen I don't think I would've been able to make that decision, which is probably why I can't justify it myself.

I'm not mad at yichen because he is a great boyfriend but there was definitely some errors in communication on both sides... as naive as jixing often is I certainly don't think she's stubborn and incapable of compromise. I feel like yichen doesn't want jixing to change or rather he doesn't want her to give up her dreams to settle for him especially if he sees that their goals are changing. he loves her enough to not want her to sacrifice anything for him and it's this altruistic quality of his that ultimately creates this safety net for jixing to be less aware of the cracks in their relationship. when they break up he says "I can't always be there just when you need me, and a background character when you don't" but he's also created this role for himself because he never voices out when he's hurt or when he needs her.

jixing is definitely not blameless and you're right that she is so comfortable in this state and in the know that her boyfriend loves her, wants to marry her, that she forgets that relationships requires effort. her immediately jumping to the conclusion of of him cheating on her I thought that was actually pretty sound on her end though. I don't think it was because she REALLY thought he had someone else, but it was because she was in such denial and shock that he would break up with her one random morning with no warning signs. none that she noticed at least.

ultimately, I think by the end of their discussion they both realize that their break up was the best decision for them, and jixing accepts it. as much as it is sad to see two people who still very much love each other break up, it's refreshing to see the maturity that is coming out of it (though I think something happens between yichen and jixing's friend 👀) anyways! I'm glad we're mutually watching this show because I looooooove songyun and I've waited for this drama for so long. I'm happy we can talk about it!

#Anonymous #borger diary #as beautiful as you

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tabuuatfacetroid · 1 year ago

Text

What has happened to the Nintendo Realms?

Everything I could have possibly wanted. Finally, I have complete unadulterated power in my Hands, and the Realms are close to being mine, and when they are, they will be consumed by the depths of Subspace forever.

I supposed I have @motheratfacetroid and @dsatfacetroid to thank for my rebirth. After years of Master Hand and Crazy Hand domineering the Realms as if the so-called Guardians were their puppets, the overlords of supremacy within the Realms had gotten sick of the Hands' antics and decided to take the reins for themselves. They sieged Final Destination, laid waste to both of the Hands, and incidentally destroyed the Monolith Crystal within the heart of their fortress. That infernal crystal had kept me bound ever since my last conquest ended in failure, all because I foolishly believed I could rely on those same puppets to fulfill my vision... but their inadequacy was the chink in my plot. But with the crystal obliterated, I felt my strength regaining like never before. All those plans, all those dreams, all those vendettas I swore to enact were finally tangible once more, and I finally took vengeance on them: the Guardians, the Hands... All of them.

With the pathetic pantheon of the Realms weakened by Mother Brain, I enslaved both Master Hand and Crazy Hand to my Chains of Light once more, I began my conquest across the Realms with an army of Primids at my side. I started at the precious beacon of innocence and hope for the Realms... Mushroom Kingdom, and in the middle of Princess Peach's 30th Birthday Party, I succeeded in the unthinkable: I killed Mario. I smote him with my amber-blood dagger, trapping his soul inside to fuel my strength. Not even the purest of Green 1UP Mushrooms could save him. The retaliation that came thereafter was violent as I slew Rosalina, the Alpha Yoshi, Wario, Donkey Kong. A select few like the cowardices Luigi, Waluigi, and Princess Daisy managed to escape my blade... but it didn't matter. After I executed Princess Peach, I took her crown, the Relic of Super Mario Galaxy, and crushed the crown in my hands. With the Realm destabilized, I could permanently shroud it in darkness. The left over R.O.B.s I had helped set up a Subspace Bomb, which detonated in the center of Mushroom Kingdom.

It bores me to go over all the little details that followed afterwards, but my conquest only became tedious after that. The crumbling of Super Mario Galaxy sent a rippling warning to the other Realms of my arrival, which only made me move up my timeline instead of relishing every moment of their demise. The next to fall was Hyrule, as I slew the virtuous Zelda and that traitor Ganondorf, using the power of the Hands to extract the Triforce of Power and Wisdom from their souls and into my hands. In the center of Hyrule Castle I detonated another Subspace Bomb, one so powerful it consumed the entire Realm. Only Link and his despicable Master Sword—the Sword that Seals the Darkness—remains as that hero fights in the shadows. But even he cannot survive the depths of Subspace for long. As my shadow bugs hunted down the Ancient Guardians of Hyrule and consumed them, they became my new agents. It won't be long now until the Triforce of Courage, the third and final piece, is mine.

The same story occurred with the Lylax System, Ivalice, Angel Land, and various alternates of a planet known as Earth. I admit, the power I faced when I came to most of these Realms was significant, but once their Guardian and their Relic was crushed, they bent to my will. There are a select few Realms that still evade my submission... the Realm of Pokémon and the Realm of Archanea and Valentia, to name a couple. But the most difficult I had faced after that was Dreamland. It is quite difficult to imagine that such a small, seemingly adorable, pink puff ball could cause so much damage. Kirby was my greatest threat yet... the power of the Star Rod enabled him abilities that could free the Hands. But once I captured his friends and smote Meta Knight and King Dedede, and took the demon's soul, Kirby was without allies any longer. Kirby escaped on a Warp Star, but with him no longer in Dreamland, that gave me the leverage I needed to consume Dreamland in eternal darkness, erupting the largest of Subspace Bombs in the center of Planet Popstar.

The grand conquest has been tiresome, but the consumption of the Realms, devouring the souls of the Guardians, and vanquishing the power of the Relics now leaves me eager to satiate my thirst for total control. I have decided to save the Metroid Realm for last, in gratitude for the inadvertent service of Mother Brain and Dark Samus of releasing me from my bonds. But when I am certain Kirby and Link are destroyed, then and only then will I begin my dominance of the last of the Realms.

And then all will fall under me.

All will fall under Tabuu.

#facetroid #tabuuatfacetroid #dsatfacetroid #motheratfacetroid #thecrazyhand #themasterhand

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