#i dont wanna draw anymore after this

[doomedclockworkdotmp3]

this man is killin me

[spoopup]

(art from april 2022)

i was looking at my old submas stuff and realised ive never posted any of it here because i had my train guys obsession prior to being active on tumblr, so here’s something i made from back then … marnie helping out ingo

p.s sorry if the formatting is weird? i made this when i primarily posted on instagram so i made everything square, i hope it looks alright

[mo-ok]

💛🌻✨ yellow ✨🌻💛

🌠

[randomminty]

Yeahlow

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Honestly your tags are so fun to read every time, i'm almost more excited for them than the actual post (but not entirely because your art is SO GOOD!!!! i adore it). If you don't mind me asking, what are you studying?

i am studying psychology because i refuse to see a therapist so ill figure out whats wrong with me myself !!!!!!!

[kissingarthurclaus]

I don't wanna wake up at 6am for work tomorrow I wanna be in star wars 😭😭😭

[chonnyjashh]

There's a toxic person who genuinely emotionally tortured me for a couple weeks that I strongly, strongly dislike who draws super peak dialtown fanart as well as dsaf fanart, and has a parody account on twt, which is how he met me. I'm worried now that we dont talk he'll move onto somebody else and do the same. I genuinely live in fear of this happening. This person also has over 8k subs on Youtube because of fucking course things couldn't be easy lmao.

I would so totally out who this person is but considering he threatened to kill himself multiple times and outright had attempts a few times whilst in contact with me, I literally can't. It sucks but like. Yeah.

Just... Know that one day you'll come across a really, really good Randy x Gingi fanart, and you'll never even know it was made by somebody who ruined my emotional state to the point I honestly don't think I'll be able to recover 💀

.... Ugh. Damn it. He's popular and well liked and I'm a complete nobody so regardless of the fact I screenshotted literally everything, it... kinda just doesn't matter, does it. Idk. The only reason I'm hesitating until I know for sure people care is bc I don't wanna do this unless I know for certain it'll have SOME effect other than just making him emotionally destroy me again/possibly harm himself. I want to be heard and I don't think him having an audience is safe in the slightest considering he severely emotionally abused a pretty badly disabled person (me) to the point I had seizures and almost ended myself too, but... like... it's not worth me dying over it if nobody will even hear me.

[actualbird]

i dont want to improve at my hobbies anymore and i mean that in the most genuine and positive way possible. im now sure that this internal pressure of constant improvement is a good chunk of why i hate writing fanfic now, i was treating it like Homework To Be Passed, like i was gonna get a Grade in it and now i cant look at any of my wips without wanting to throw up so. i dont wanna be better at the things i do for fun. yknow, when not working, ive been drawing much more than writing. and old habits die hard, the evil hustle part of my brain is chanting "get better at it!! actively make it a skill!!! study color learn new techniques watch tutorials and and and and and" the tired part of my brain just wants that demon gone. i dont wanna get better at it, i dont want a new skill, i dont want this to be ruined like how it ruined fanfic for me, i just wanna draw the same silly little chibis of my faves over and over again because it makes me happy. i dont want improvement anymore, i just want fun

[doodlebeeberry]

odd positioning

alt versions cause i am. indecisive

[glitzybunny]

Tempted to do redesigns for fun, but for what im not explaining NSNANXN

[real-life-cloud]

im GOING to write today ........ i WILL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[en-chi-la-da]

Hey Chi, What's your opinion of Kazuichi Souda (and What's your favorite 3 straight ships with him?)

ok anon im gonna give you the condensed version of my first impression of mr. souda and how it developed as i went through sdr2:

intro/chapter 1: "OH GOD I REALLY LIKE THIS DESIGN!!! UH OH 😳"

chapter 2: "ah we have our best bro character here i see. he's so silly. so cute. oh im starting to actually like him pls dont die :("

some time after chapter 3: "ok i get that he has a crush on sonia but like. he's becoming a simp about it. hope that doesn't last"

chapter 4 onwards to the end of the game basically: "???what the fuck have they done to you you annoying little shit"

and my opinion of him now? he's my scrunkly, he's a dumb little bitch baby, he's my little meow meow, a wet tissue paper boy (all said with affection) <3 his design still slaps and i lov him. feels like im doing this 👇🏼 to him in my brain:

(LMAO my favorite """straight"" ships with him??? like m/f?? i htink trying to ship him with like. mahiru or miu is pretty funny. other than that i really don't ship him with any of the girls 😅 i'd want him to have a normal FRIENDship with these girls first tbh)

[aria0fgold]

Got distracted and I ended up working on my drawing But then I realized a major mistake on it when I thought I was done with the star veil (yes, again. I changed up the stars at the tips of it, this veil is kicking my ass) and I was erasing stuff already so when I realized I'm like: FUCK-- undo undo undo undo und o un do u n d o. And now I gotta... move All those new lil designs at the tip, Again, so I'm like: Okay... alright... I'll do that Later. I'll write now cuz god Forbid I do anything in that design, it's all mistakes!

[glass-trash-bab]

Why is focusing so fucking hard

[risingsunresistance]

i went back and edited a tiny part of that drawing so if you see two reblogs and think one looks different that's bc it is, just ignore it jhdkdh

[sludgeguzzler]

ever since the pandemic ended and i started going out and talking to people with the goal of "making friends being happy loving life" ive started o realize that i in fact do not enjoy the stay at home doing nothing not talking to anyone lifestyle and that i love calling ppl and that nature is actually the bomb, all the times id rather stay in bc "im just not an outings guy" is actually bc im like. traumatized or something