#i dont rly like how this came out but! i made it so im gonna post

[mewnikitty]

[jellitchi]

vat7k designs in my head...

i thought their canon designs were a eensy weensy bit Unpolished so i made these mostly for myself. erm if u rly want it i think varian is 19 here, hugo 19, nuru 18, yong 12.

i also made rhem all playlists and had to draw them a cover so thats what the last img is I linked each of em under my notes for all of em... Under the cut is Like a Huge Infodump of notes i have for each chara,,,,,,

i kept varians design basically the same, i dislike the design w the orange neck thing so i just Nuked it😭... Here's Varians playlist

Hugos design i just wanted to put him in something more Loose. hes a thief, a professional escape artist. i dont think wearing clunky metal is ideal for him. i also gave him a prosthetic arm (blond w no arm design trope!) but u cant see it in the ref so i added another drawing of him in his under layering👍 i vaguely referenced russian(?) clothes for him as well... Yeah not too much changed w him i just tried to make him slippery-er. Here's Hugo's playlist

yong came relatively easy to me, if it wasn't obvious i did rip gaming from g*nshin's hoodie. i thought the lion hood was Adorable and freaking perfect for what i had in mind for hos character. since the og notes said the fire kingdom is loosely Chinese inspired i basically just kept that. i mashed tgt a buncha diff dynasties though sorry for how inconsistent i was... i think he looks Okay. anyways i changed yongs role a bit, ill explain why im adjusting some of their roles later but i kept yong as the Jinx Type character. hes the eldest in his family and has a buncha younger siblings, hes a lion dancer and does performances w his family/siblings. he rly like special effects n keeps tryna incorporate his fireworks into their performances (it flops and he has to sew up the dmg) ill explain more of yongs role in another post maybe shrugs... Here's Yong's Playlist

miss nuru was a bit of a struggle for me i might share my full design process with her coz i did a Bunch of mockups for her😭😭😭... i didnt have a specific country of reference for her but i chose to make her vaguely south asian inspired. i also really wanted to keep the sheer fabric w the star / constellation map. i love that idea its so cute so shes still technically the navigator. but she also wields a sword too, fencing or whatever. (her and varian r Huge Cass fangirls which is probably why she started tryna use a sword (snuck out to watch cass compete) Okay ill talk abt this later) in my head, okay ill Probably make a whole nother post talking abt how im interpreting/writing each chara, but in my head i think nuru is the youngest and her kingdom's archivist. shes mostly in charge of like Her kingdoms history / artifacts / etc. ok im getting too side tracked ill save the lore dump for later but thats Nurus role in the party. Here's Nuru's Playlist

uhm below i made their character stats mostly to help me with planning / role developing. the yellow is their base stats the color behind is their end stats i guess. i was gonna explain my reasoning for their stats but ermm this post is kinda Really long so sorry😭... varian max int for obvious reasons, also max charisma just coz i feel like u kinda learn a thing or two being around a couple manipulators and spending time in jail idk shrugs... (also lets not forget the "ud b surprised what ppl would do for a cookie!") Hugo slippery guy, if a brick is thrown at him as hes running hes gonna try n run faster to shatter it, his mindset is Run Run Run! i think hes relatively agile too but yeah mostly a Speedster. i think he n varian got no Physical strength varian maybe just like A little coz Farm boy but I rly doubt quirin is making him do a Lotta heavy lifting. yong has incredible stamina and agility because hed a performer. nuru is the strongest coz this team would literally Flop without a proper Offense😭... i think varian n hugo r able to outwit plenty of their opponents but i think nuru is pretty good in a fight, same w yong. Yeah Okay Sorry for a Long Long Post thanks hope u guys enjoy

[phagodyke]

my god. new contender for most shite day at work this year so far

another morning another free bus journey..

[ritzcuit]

PART 2 of "looking at all the times datz says something gay or familial that drives me crazy." i guess?! should look at part 1 if you havent yet

soj spoilers ahead obvs. part 1 here in case u missed it

i skipped A LOT between the last post and now, bc datz doesn't show up for. a while. Well like he does a little bit but it's not gay or anything. it doesn't matter. what matters is that we're back in khura'in now, we're apollo now, and athena is here

and um, dhurke is arrested for murder. lol. but talking to athena in one of those "what to do" segments gets this.......

which up until this point i haven't actually seen yet. the noise i made. DATZ HAVING A HEART ATTACK? IM GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK!!! WWAAAHHH!! :(!!!!! THINK ABOUT IT!! THINK ABOUT DATZ SCARED OUT OF HIS MIND FOR DHURKE'S SAFETY. THINK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!! i don't exactly know what "wanted datz to go to him" means exactly. go to dhurke? well it doesnt matter i guess. cus the way they know damn well datz would freak out and try to bust dhurke out of jail...Sniffle... Sob........ i love datz so much.... loyalest man alive fr dont play with me

and then a Lot more bullshit happens, but good news;

theyre at the defiant dragons hideout again ^_^ with the photos ^_^ if you investigate them, you get this! here comes datz jumping at the chance to talk abt his (friend's) family again. the day WEEEEEEEEEE all went out fishing. shut up. WE!!! i always knew datz was there, in my heart, taking the photo... earlier, dhurke says "the three of us [dhurke, aj, yuty] living in the mountains", but clearly datz came by often enough. WE! WE WENT FISHING! WEEE!!! its just so easy to imagine... datz insisting they take a photo .. i cant take it... how many times was datz there. fishing w them. helping cook dinner and dealing w two rambunctious boys...crying

he also takes the chance to be hurt over yuty again.. datz has a lot to say about nahyuta.

investigating the sign [sic] gives datz a chance to geek about how cool dhurke is. "his fame as a lawyer spread far and wide!" i'm sure that's how they intended for datz knows about dhurke's lawyer days, but again, i like to believe datz was his weirdgirl. he probably was the advertising campaign if we're honest 😭

now we're talking to datz directly again ^_^ asking him about the sahdmadhi law offices. "and i quote" is so annoying. i know he's doing a deep voiced impression of dhurke right there. Stop memorizing shit he says. Gay

then! he says dhurke mentioned he wants apollo to take over the offices one day...which cute and whatever, but this isnt abt dhurke's dadliness, this is about datz being such a FUCKING GEEK! he's talking to dhurke directly, right, so why are you gassing him up 😭😭 TO HIMSELF! HE'S DHURKE! "must've been because of you, dhurke!" he's too much of a good friend. he's convinced everyone thinks dhurke is as cool as He thinks dhurke is. it's insane. the fanboy behavior will never end

it's nice to see dhurke and datz interact too. we really don't see much of that in this game. dhurke always seems kind of understated with datz as compared to when he's being Boisterous Dad or Rebel Leader in public... how many quiet moments did they share together... just sharing news and shooting the shit...dhurke doesn't have to put on big leader charisma 'cause datz uplifts him no matter what. Gay

Why Do You Know That, Datz

well, it's obvious why he knows that. BC HE WAS THEEEERREEEEEE of course, as a friend of someone, you wouldn't be totally blind to how they raise their kids, but we KNOW datz was there running around! paying attention. noticing these things. crazy. knowing another man's parenting style is crazy. "that much i'm sure of" knowing another man's Thoughts is crazy. Gay

also just makes me emo :( datz rly got front row seats to dhurke's parental anguish. i can imagine a hundred convos just like the earlier one, where dhurke regrets it, and datz is trying to cheer him up, same as always ...

datz has a lot to say about nahyuta. (asking him about nahyuta obviously) actually it isnt that much. but it's so funny. him being a hypeman for both sahdmadhis is so cute... and also him seeming frustrated that he doesn't know Why yuty is acting this way...'cause he cares :( he cares for his yuty :( CAUSE HE HELPED RAISE THAT DAMN KID!

ill smack dhurke rn he pisses me off so bad sometimes. datz is out here worrying over YOUR CHILD! and you're leaving him out to dry :( datz really loves that family...thinking about him trying to nudge answers out of dhurke, but respecting his boundaries all the while...GRRRRRR he's too good for you dhurke. you need to treasure what you have

asking datz about apollo's biological father leads to another Datz Exposition Dump in which i lose my mind bc he remembers too much about this fucking family. it's almost like he cares for them or something. "dhurke's the kinda guy who can become%$^%&#$%^" THIS ISNT ABOUT DHURKE QUIT GUZZLING HIM FOR 5 SECONDS! STOP!

this part is key to me cause, again, WEEEEEEE. *WE!* it proves that datz had been friends with dhurke before anything happened... a lot of his Datz Yapping could have just been recited stories, stuff he knew secondhand, but being close enough with dhurke to help him look for an orphaned baby's mother While fending off accusations of terrorism..... it's key. real ones get it. it isnt just "oh datz is a family friend" it's "datz was there at the beginning of everything". before the dragons started at all! Gay

presenting dhurke's law book gets this. not explicitly dhurke guzzling rly but idgaf. I also refuse it being metaphorical. give datz a gay chest tattoo. COWARD! just imagine it. how intimate it would be... who was doing the tattoos for the dragons at that time anyway? a stick n poke by dhurke would be cool and badass, but then asking dhurke to do a whole chest piece on his best friend... dhurke's like, "are you sure? that's ... pretty intense," but datz's burning passion for the revolution is intense, isn't it? fellas is it gay to impart your personal symbol of revolution onto your best friend's chest by candlelight? because i'm making it by candlelight now? Hello

presenting amara's assassination file. "i got the whole thing memorized" i should smack him genuinely. ive had enough of this man for real. CUS WHY ARE YOU MEMORIZING THAT? his loyalty knows no bounds. also datz sad about yuty again.. omfg i know he is SO SAD about that boy

he is genuinely the sahdmadhi's number one fan. him being dhurke's boyfriend would be less gay than what he has going on now. like despite everything there's still Something to be proud of yuty for...even if it's being a turncoat enldkfngd ... datz cant help it...that's his lil baby 😭

there isn't a lot left in the way of like, anything, but there is this

datz coming in at the last second with Dhurke Can Do No Wrong again. not very gay but i do like them existing together :)

he's just so. ugh. i wonder what happened here so bad. how did dhurke and datz meet up at all? but dhurke asked datz to break him out and datz was like OKAY YAY ^_^ bc he probably was itchy about dhurke being in custody at all. sorry aj! objectively it looks bad but datz is, i think, incapable of seeing dhurke in a critical eye, so he just assumes dhurke's Got A Plan and he's totally coming back 'cause why wouldn't he :) he doesn't even think dhurke got caught again or anything. hes like. well surely dhurke did escape, because he's dhurke and he's the coolest most capable amazing perfect man in existence. Obviously

(those who know..)

:(

honestly, a little underwhelming all things considered, he bounces back immediately right after this because he is A Freak. well, no, it's bc he knows damn well it's what dhurke would have wanted, dragon yielding and whatnot. but seeing his sad little face devastates me. he tries to put on a determined face at first, only to revert back to this sad pensive sprite... datz... honey....

how freaky is it that datz was running around with the ghost of his bestie without even realizing it? well, that dhurke's been dead for so long... even "you're a sight for sore eyes" is with ghost dhurke, right?!

oh he got over it

"like how dhurke always wanted" WHAT ABOUT YOU. DATZ. YOU. AS A PERSON. YOU ALSO WANTED THIS. YOU COULDNT SAY "WE"? well it's in memory of dhurke, right? to honor his death? that makes sense. surely this is the last time he attributes something to dhurke specifically

STOP

and that, actually, is it. well roughly? considering i found a new section of dialogue that i totally missed up until this point, i wouldn't be surprised if something slipped my mind. I also have no idea if this was worth anyone's time, but i had fun with it anyway :3

if u read this far then cheers!! if u have any thoughts abt these specific morsels then tell me about them..!! again, like, i know it is Literally datz's purpose as a character to be the sahdmadhi lore dump in lieu of dhurke and yuty, but that just means they created an uncle who loves that family with all his heart. if we ever EVER!!!!! got any canon acknowledgement of khura'in again, which i doubt we will, i'd pray and beg for another crumb of datz content. please...

[desire-mona]

Opinions on jacksfilms v sssniperwolf?

Penny for ur thoughts plz 🪙 (<- pretend that is a penny shhhhh)

this ask is an equivalent to asking for my hand in marriage just btw.

so in case anyone doesnt know anything abt this old ass drama (i dont know as much as i could either, this is a retelling from the bits and pieces i remember):

so basically sssniperwolf used to be this gaming youtuber but she eventually turned into a half baked "reaction" channel where she just watches tiktoks, makes low effort surface level commentary, and then doesnt credit the creator of said tiktoks. jacksfilms is a comedy youtuber who does a bunch of stuff (sketches, streaming, something called YIAY where he gives ppl prompts / questions to answer n reads em out(with credit!(also hes been doing stuff with ai recently but mostly to show how mid it is which like. eh idk how i feel abt it but its not a dealbreaker))) and he at one point in 2023 called out sniper for her content stealking and lazy content.

he started doing this thing where he reacted to her videos the way she reacts to the videos she steals? i think? and then he gives credit to the creators that sniper reacts to i hope ur following. sniper eventually got mad and was like "uhhhmmm ur stealing from me....." which is rly funny considering she steals from SO many ppl. they had lowkey beef for a while (and obv jack was in the right the entire time) and on uhhhhhh lemme look this up hold on. october 13th of last year sniper posted an instagram story poll like "jacksfilms is close to this place im shooting at should i go see him" i guess to like? talk things out?

(src)

and then some amnt of time later while jack was playing jackbox on stream with his editors and stuff (dubbed the council) sniper showed up at his house, stood outside, and posted a video OF HIS HOME ON HER STORY. ON HER INSTAGRAM WITH OVER 5 MILLION FOLLOWERS. also to add even more context that i found out from youtube comments, sniper has been arrested for armed robbery before, so! some council member alerted jack and erin (jack's wife) was like "erm im gonna go outside" and everyone was like NO DONT OMG. eventually she deleted the story but by that point it was like wayyyy too late. and photos of his house were alr on twitter and stuff. the most ridiculous part is that when jack was rightfully like WHAG GHE HELL she was like this guy is creepy and hes been harassing me! i just wanna talk!!!

jacksfilms made a video being like heyyyyy youtube can u do smthn abt this???? youtube, of course, did nothing in response. i honestly dont know how it ended but snipers still doing her thing and so is jack so ultimately nothing substantial came of it, i guess. i wasnt on stream when it happened but i was GLUED to twitter as it was unfolding since ive been a big jacksfilms fan since i was 12ish. crazy times

WAIT EDIT I FORGOT TO ADD MY OPINION OOPS LOL: FUCK SNIPERWOLF

also fun fact! ive had a couple convos with a council member (marshaldoesstuff u will always be famous) and i was in his discord FOREVER ago. like 2018 forever ago. got groomed in that server it was kinda goofy (NOT marshal's fault - nor the mods of said server, im still friends with a few of those mods and they were always so protective of me and were there to put a stop to everything, i love them dearly.) so yeah im kinda etched into jacksfilms lore in a way that VERY few remember. which is the case for a few different fandoms tbh.

second fun fact: jack and erin r house md fans (erin has a crush on house and jack has a crush on cuddy which is sooo based of them)

thank u for asking and thank u for reading :3 i luv jacksfilms

[the-pea-and-the-sun]

how did it take me so long to start calling myself aromantic/arospec. like now that ive actually started using the term for myself its so crazy to me that i wasnt using this term since the first time i heard about it. i literally remember like almost a year ago being like "i wish i could just call myself aromantic itd just be a way easier way to explain to people the sort of relationships i want since im interested in sex and really close friendships but not really interested in traditional romantic relationships right now" like my brother you CAN?? jesus fuck. like this thought came aftera series of relationships where i would tell my friends that i had a crush on someone, then the relationship progressed in someway, then i got the sense that the person i was interested in had romantic feelings for me and id get this weird horrible feeling and would run away. and i was literally like "what is this whats going on". i was like woah this must be like.... commitment issues or something. like i was going around telling people that. i was getting over commitment issues that were surely temporary. but they werent asking me to commit to anything they just had feelings for me that i couldnt reciprocate bcz i was just attracted to them and wanted to me friends with them and i thought thats what romantic attraction was. i literally remember telling someone abt someone i liked an they were like "why dont u ask them out?" an my answer was just that i was trying to find reasons not to and i couldnt. cuz i was attracted to them and liked spending time with them and liked being their friend but i was so so happy not being in a romantic relationship anymore and i couldnt shake the feeling that if i got into another one even with the perfect person it was literally gonna ruin my life and i would have to pretend to have feelings that i didnt have.

idk im frustrated that i hadnt considered it sooner but its also kinda exciting to discover something abt urself an ur sexuality. like this label brings me the same joy that other labels that ive discovered fit me do like i feel like how i felt when i came to terms w being trans an being bisexual. i feel like im 13 again finding trans and bisexual youtubers and being like "??? there are others?" like ppl dont talk abut it as much w being aro and ace bcz those are defined by the absence of a feeling rather than the presence of one but it really can be just as exciting to find out that you're aro or ace as it can be to discover that you're a lesbian or gay or transgender or something.

like not to be cheesy but discovering that i could just. have friends and also have sex made everything kinda click in my head for me. like literally i felt like a more complete person. experiencing that and realizing like. oh. this is amazing this is literally all i want like nothing is missing. i literally just dont have to do romance stuff like no ones making me do that why did i think i have to do that. like oh my god this is such a good feeling i really can do whatever i want forever.

this post doesnt rly have a point exactly i just kinda have a lot of feelings to get out. i love you aromantic ppl i love being aromantic it fucking rules actually. every aromantic person whos posted abt their experience an helped me get comfortable w the label i owe u a hundred billion dollars jesus christ i love you guys

[psychopompsglomps]

followed by a math girl 😵‍💫😍 i have so much respect for u + ur people (mathematicians) i still dont rly get what a negative nukmber is. teach me a fun math fact pleeeaassee (even tho we arent friends yet ur bio made me so curious)

ooh hehe 1. i should probably update my intro im aconite and im more of a cat than a person or girl nowadays tho still in the area of girl

2. no one ever takes me up on that hehe :3

soooo if that's ur level im gonna assume ur joking but also my first idea for a "relatively low level" thing was induction versus strong induction, which is a Fundamentals of Proofs sorta topic which is! easy enough but functions in a context u likely have no experience in!

so instead im gonna pull up some dates for understanding of 0 and the creation of negatives and such!

first of all tho the fun thing to remember is:

the greeks? those bitches never even dreamt of 0. Pythagoras, Plato with his solids and his platonic ideals? they couldn't even tolerate the barest idea that we could numerically represent an absence, a null, with such a clever and useful tool as 0.

the romans aren't even worth mentioning. i could do an aside about the greeks and irrational numbers but i think u might be starting to realize how rambly i am already ^-^

there are ancient uses of symbols to represent similar ideas to 0, but the oldest proper 0, naught, that we have record of is from the Mayans and probably Olmecs as well, and apparently we have records dated to ~36 bce of that! babylonians had a *placeholder 0,* which the greeks adopted, but that was really just for writing out long numbers, like 101, where it simply represents an absence in the enumeration of digits, nyea? the greeks and romans did start to use their placeholder 0 in astronomical calculations and such but nor in formal mathematics so much, still as the additive identity (the extremely convenient property of not changing a value when added to it) but not so much for its other useful properties (everything going to it when multiplied by it, for instance).

china also had a placeholder 0 for a long while

but where we started seeing 0 used as an actual, proper number that we can do math on is in india, then it travelled via islamic scholarship around. apparently the word root for algorithm is from the persian scholar Muhammad ibn Musa Al-Khwarizmi, whose multiplication tables in the 800s ce came to be known in the european powers in the 1100s under the latin title "algorithmi de numero Indorum." so 0 took a long time to spread but really did revolutionize math everywhere it was used.

it's weird and difficult to explain just how much of modern mathematics rests entirely on the concept of 0 as an identity, but it really does!

anyways negatives are an abstraction and they were made to represent subtracting an amount, they're very useful numbers in their own right as a result but that's literally the whole idea. -1 is what you would need to add to 1 to achieve the goal of subtracting and reaching 0, since subtraction was very much invented before negatives :3

one of my favorite numerical bases is base -2, as in u count the digits as 1, -2, 4, -8, 16, -32 etc. very cutesy, forms a legitimate and intensely annoying counting system, practically useless as such but can be helpful to think about

[henriiiii-1001old]

tmc fairy tale au!!!

SO this is actually a concept i had a few months ago that i never rly expanded upon.

first, let me explain the basics:

i assigned different tmc characters to different fairy tales, but they all exist in the same universe.

Adam - Rapunzel Evelin - Snow White/Flynn Rider Jonah - Little Mermaid Sarah - Gretel/Daughter from The Juniper Tree Mark - Hansel/Stepson from The Juniper Tree Cesar - Frog Prince Thatcher - Lumberjack guy from Red Riding Hood Ruth - Red Riding Hood Dave - Father from The Juniper Tree Six - Gothel Gabriel - Stepmother from The Juniper Tree Preacher - The Sea Witch Stanley - The Candy Witch Alt!Thatch - Big Bad Wolf

next, some art i made for the au!!!

and now, huge lore dump! >:)c its gonna be long so buckle your seatbelts LMAO

so, the main plot of this au is basically that adam has been stuck in a tower in the middle of nowhere for almost 21 years. he had been raised by six, who is actually a witch set on taking over the kingdoms that surround the nearby areas (aka the counties). one day, six it out doing stuff, and while he's gone prince evelin (yes she's a prince bc fuck it) ends up finding the tower. she decides to climb it out of curiosity.

she ends up in a standoff against adam, but to try to deescalate things, they introduce themselves to each other. all of a sudden before they could talk more, adam hears six coming back and hides evelin in a nearby closet. evelin sees adam and six get into a fight abt adam wanting to go out into the world for once, but six is all "you're not ready" and it just gets really bad. all until six lovebombs adam and leaves again to get something for adam's upcoming 21st birthday.

evelin had exited the closet as six left, and she's like "you let him do that to you?" adam is like "uh yeah? he always does? i dont see them problem" and evie starts making adam question everything. she promises to take adam into the world but return him by night in case six came back. they'd also stay near the tower just in case as well.

cut to jonah's pov! he's a simple merman wanting to be a part of the human world! he sees evie and adam having a lot of fun and wishes he could join them. his dad (yes, if jonah is the little mermaid, the fucking mervin marshall is the king by proxy DCFVGBHNJ) is all like "nuh uh too dangerous, especially with most of the witches residing on land anyway" and jonah is like "FUCKING BET!"

he goes to the sea witch, preacher, and asks for legs and talks about seeing adam and evie hanging out! and preacher is like "im sorry WHO????" bc she knows that adam shouldnt be out and about. she makes jonah promise that as part of the deal, he must return adam to six in three days time, otherwise he'll turn back into a merman. he quickly agrees, and the whole deal is made. preacher does go tell six about this, and while he freaks out at first, preacher is like "it's ok dude i got this. i got a client to promise to return him home as part of our deal. you're fine m'dude."

jonah ends up on land and tries teaching himself how to talk while finding a cloth to barely dress himself with. adam and evie do eventually see him and they're like "yo who tf are you?" and while jonah cant talk, they do find a way to write to each other and they become friends!!!!

they do also eventually meet sarah at some point, and oh b o y does she have a backstory.

SO, in order to explain her backstory, let me explain the story of "the juniper tree" (copy pasted from discord LMAO)

"so a mother is peeling apples under a juniper tree and accidentally cuts her finger. the blood drips onto the snow on the ground, and that (somehow) grants the woman's wish to have a child as white as snow and as red as blood. she dies after giving birth to her perfect child, and the father soon remarries, having a daughter of her own.

she loved her daughter but hated her stepson and abused him every day and is all "i want my daughter to inherit your father's money." she then leads her children to a chest of apples one day. she lets her daughter pick an apple from the chest, but when her stepson came to pick one, she slammed the chest on his head and decapitated him.

she then set it up to where the same thing would happen again but the daughter would be there to witness it all, and her mother would gaslight her into thinking that she murdered her own brother. she then literally turned her stepson into soup and fed him to her husband. the daughter was so grossed out and distraught the entire time, but she couldn't rat her mother out. she ended up burying her brother's bones under the juniper tree.

then, he reincarnated as a bird and sung a song to some townspeople to convince them to help him get revenge on his stepmother. he gathered a golden chain for his father, red shoes for his sister, and a millstone to crush his stepmother. he reveals himself to his family and they live happily ever after."

here's the changes i made to the original story:

instead of just the mother dying, both of mark and sarah's prents die, and now they are in the sole custody of dave

instead of having the caretaker marry someone, dave asks his friend "o'brien" to help raise mark and sarah

instead of the stepmother dying, it is revealed that o'brien was actually the great mage gabriel trying to steal something important to their plans that dave just so happens to have

and thats it CFVGBHNJM. gabriel does try and come back every once in a while to coax gabe into either letting them come back or trying to make dave give himself up for sarah's sake.

cesar's story is also p cool imo! he is the prince of bythorne and evelin's cousin! they got along great when evelin was younger, but that stopped once cesar disappeared.

this was caused by him saving mark and sarah from the candy witch, stanley, who had lured them in to specifically kill mark. cesar saw what was going on and saved the two of them before it was too late.

later that night, stanley decided to be a petty bitch and curse cesar into being a frog so he wouldn't be able to save anyone else from her or her sisters' (in which six is her like. brother but i'll explain why later LMAO) plans. cesar hid in the shadows of mandela kingdom's palace for years since then.

since cesar's disappearance, evelin had wanted to take the role of prince to honor him. she also used it as a way to not have to be trapped inside the palace walls and coddled. she ended up still feeling stuck anyway, which led to her sneaking out to travel through the woods, which ofc led her one day to find adam's tower.

at some point (if anything this would be after evie and adam meet and stuff), evelin finds cesar in his frog form on the windowsill of the guest room he would regularly stay in whenever he would come to mandela to visit. he finds that she isnt revolted by his new appearance and is actually willing to help him out!

he explains that he learned that most curses can be cured by "true love's kiss", which in storybooks was always seen as romantic. he had always viewed evelin like a little sister, so he felt that he was hopeless.

that was until evelin thought of a loophole, since the stories never explicitly said that it was romantic, she would try to break the curse purely through the love she has for him as her cousin. she kisses the top of cesar's head, and cesar has returned to his human form!!!

...well, somewhat. the curse had altered his human form due to it not being broken for years on end, so cesar came back deformed. his limbs were too long and half of his face was always covered by a dark shadow. cesar did freak out about this, but evelin assured him that he'll always be her cesar, no matter what he looked like.

evelin and cesar explained the situation and cesar was finally returned to bythorne. he did write a letter a bit after wards telling her that he has resigned from his princely duties to become a princess! maybe it would help him not have to struggle with the expectations of needing to be brave and bold, and it would be a thank you to evelin for taking his role as a prince!!!

speaking of evelin, let's go back to her for a minute. so, i had also put her as snow white, but we haven't really seen her fulfill that role yet. weeelllll...

at some point in the story, six finds evelin alone in the forest and offers her to take a bite of an apple in exchange for knowledge about adam and his past. the thing is, evelin HATES fruit so she's like "ewww do i have tooo" and six is like "if you really wanna know, then you gotta."

evelin agrees and bites into the apple. it tastes so fucking gross, but she feels like she was to swallow it to finish her end of the deal. once she swallows, the pieces suddenly cling onto her throat, choking her in the process. as she struggles to breathe, six begins to tell her who adam truly is.

adam is a regular boy who six took as part of a deal made by his parents. lynn had been getting pregnancy cravings and wanting the rapunzel frm the neighbor's garden. she made jude retrieve them for her, but it wasn't enough. eventually, jude got caught by six and agreed to give up their firstborn child in exchange to continue taking the flowers.

once adam was born, lynn and jude were killed by six, and he took adam away to raise him as his prodigy. as a catalyst for the witches' plans.

as six is explaining all of this to evelin, she is trying her hardest to take him down with her. fuck the info he's giving her, he tricked her, and now he has to pay. she swings with all her might but falls in vain. her vision goes black as six walks away from her dying body...

there's probably a "mother knows best reprise" moment here and six is all like "oh you might wanna go save your friend if you care about her so much" and adam freaks tf out. she's desperately trying to think of something to help evelin.

eventually, the group remember's cesar's story with "true love's kiss" and they're like "fuck it let's try that". adam, while literally sobbing, plants a small kiss on her forehead and prays for her to wake up.

while this is all happening, evelin ets visited by mark's spirit. he basically hypes her up and is like "you got this girlie!!!" and she wakes up after adam plants his kiss on her. she starts to choke again, but adam helps her with it and heimlichs the apple out of her throat. she's finally able to breathe, and the group celebrates.

however, the happy moment doesn't last for too long. jonah does eventually return adam to six behind evelin and sarah's backs, but afterward he feels so guilty for it. they literally sacrificed one of the first human friends he's ever made for legs. how stupid is that? they eventually go to sarah and evelin and they quickly figured out what happened. while evelin goes to the tower to save adam (with help from a certain spirit), sarah and jonah confront preacher.

there is gonna be a plot abt preacher almost taking over the seas, but jonah and sarah do eventually take her down and retrieve jonah's voice. and yes, sarah gets to see that jonah is a merman and she's actually like "YO WAIT YOU GUYS ARE REAL???" and jonah is like "UH YEAH?????"

and yes, adam does eventually escape as well, but i dont have those details either so ye :')

that's the main plot at least! i do have a subplot for thatcher's pov tho! more copy paste from discord

"thatcher and ruth are friends and live nearby each other. ruth usually helps out w raising mark and sarah, though mark by this point is dead so dave DEFINITELY needs help. he and sarah havent been taking his death well, especially since dave literally ate mark’s remains without knowing. and sarah feels guilty enough for being gaslit into believing that she killed mark.

so ruth is about to go to dave’s place and has to walk through the forest to get there. she eventually meets what seems to be a very friendly wolf. she is a little weirded out by it, but she eventually tells it how dave lost mark and that she’s helping out! and the wolf is like “oh thats cool! i wish you luck on your journey. though i must say, these flowers smell beautiful! maybe you should pick some and take them to your dear friend!” and as ruth collects flowers as the wolf suggested, it found thatcher nearby and took his appearance to take a visit to a particular dave lee." ...

"she gets to dave's place who has been escorted out by the wolf/alt thatcher, right? so he's like "dear friend, why don't you rest! you've spent all day walking here, and you should be able to rest" aaaaand he tries to turn her into a werewolf but then thatcher comes in and is like "AYO TF YOU DOING TO MY BESTIE????" and he and the wolf fight. thatcher ends up getting bitten but is able to ward him off with his axe that was laced with silver just in case. so ruth is saved, but overtime thatcher feels more pain surge throughout his body and just kinda. turns one night.

unfortunately, he ends up killing ruth. alt thatcher tries to take this as an opportunity to maybe make him join the witches, but thatcher ofc refuses and makes a break towards dave's house. thatcher ends up telling dave what happened, and dave is okay with helping him hide it as well as hiding his newfound lycanthropy

sarah overhears this convo and becomes EXTREMELY angry at thatcher bc ruth was helping dave raise her after mark died. she was basically the mother figure sarah had always wanted, and thatcher took that away from her."

that's it for plot!!! now for some witch shenanigans >:)

so the witches are basically all the alts who usually practice shapeshifting magic to like. deceive others and all that jazz. ive made it a running joke that six is technically the only guy there FVGBHNJ

like, stanley is fem, preacher is female, alt!thatcher is copying thatcher who is transfem in this au, and gabriel dresses fem. six (and by proxy adam) is literally the only guy there DCFVGBHNJ

i am. running out of energy but i think that's everything for rn. hope you enjoy this au though!!!! ive put a lot into it <33333

[doyouevenshipbr0]

incoming hot take/rant about natsu and his romantic pairings and his understanding of love

gonna say something thats gonna get me in trouble

natsu has more objectively romantic moments (and i would even dare to say romantic chemistry) with lisanna than lucy.

now, with that being said, i like n*lu more than i like n*li (i do still like n*li tho. dont know why pol hate it sm. its cute!). but like. on a romantic level, natsu has veryyyyy little moments w lucy. he has way more emotional, powerful, and deep moments with lucy. but they’re not romantic.

but as its been shown especially in 100 yq, natsu doesnt really have a grasp on romantic love. he doesn’t get flustered or blush around lucy (for the most part), he doesn’t understand that lucy clearly has romantic feelings for him, and i think the most obvious piece of evidence of this is in 100 yq when that lady (please forgive me i rly have a hard time keeping up w all the villains) cast that spell that made snow dolls out of “the woman held closest in ur heart” or whatever. for gray, just juvia appeared. for natsu, literally every girl in ft appeared.

i just feel like even in the very small moments natsu and lisanna have, and as insignificant as they are in recent ft, natsu always seems a little nervous/shy. at least in old ft. now, its also very obvious that these moments of awkward natsu who may or may not have a crush on lisanna are waaaaaay less frequent now. but in the very beginning of ft when we first learn ab lisanna was literally the most romantic interaction ive seen natsu have with anyone. and i would argue this is the most romantic interaction his character has EVER had. in the whole series.

now, im not an idiot. i know nalu will be end game. as they should be!!! they have arguably the strongest bond of literally anyone in the whole show. u cannot deny their insane compatibility and how they just make sense! i also know that natsu loves lucy more than ANYONE (ok maybe other than happy. theyre prob tied). but i think natsu doesn’t differentiate this from romantic love. YET.

i think something will definitely go down where natsu has this huge revelation that he not only loves lucy but is IN love with her.

but for right now, the most romantic interest natsu has expressed with another person is lisanna. im standing by that.

there should also be something said for the fact i feel like mashima dumbed natsu down over the years???? like in the beginning he was playful, optimistic, brash, and fun loving. i think he is still all of these things but mashima has steadily made natsu less and less understanding of social queues and more socially unaware. idk if that makes sense.

^but i feel like if u asked ep 1 natsu the difference between love and romantic love, he would be able to tell u. now, i dont think he understands the difference. i do think this will change, but for rn thats how i see it.

anyways blah blah blah. to end this senseless rant, lisanna should have stayed dead. bringing her back to life was one of the DUMBEST things ft ever did. not even bc i like n*lu better than n*li. but bc the significance that lisanna had for natsu and what she meant for his character completelyyyyy went away. his childhood gf came back from the dead and he literally could not give less of a fuck about her now lmao. its so bizarre.

ok dont hate me byeeeeee

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

diiary 2/25/2023

okayyy i been needing to write a longform post for a while! just to chronicle some thoughts in a cohesive way. & getting straight to the point: i'm realizing there is very little, if ANY payoff, to being an artist online. i'm not talking about money. im talking about the way it's like, the more ppl start to see you as an "artist", the more they feel like ur some kind of public figure they can lash out at w no repercussions. ur humanity is just wiped from their minds. i don't have some huge following by any means but for ME its gotten big since in the past i've been a serial deleter. usually at 800 followers im gone.

i love being creative & sharing for the sake of sharing but i deeply fear any kind of spotlight. since i came back onto tumblr i made the pledge to myself not to delete my account if it started growing but now im having second thoughts!! well i'll never delete this account cus im too sentimental but part of me just wants to stop posting in the ways i tend to do. like maube im too forthcoming & need to slink back into the shadows a bit. because i don't want to stop contributing art & music to the world but idk how to protect my heart.

like it's so crazy to me that artists are expected to b these idealistic icons of everything the viewer represents & if they make a single mistake its like fuck we better launch a pUBLIC HARASSMENT CAMPAIGN!! genuinely like, how are people supposed to want to put themselves out there when the climate is so hostile? it has got me feelin rly nihilistic i must admit. trying to put nice stuff into the world shld not be generating drama for me, especially when it's just my hobby & not even my "career".

for a while ive had no idea what to do for work or how to generate income in a way that works for me but honestly? im gonna bite the bullet & do some coding bootcamps so i can try n get a remote job doing some tech shit & making a fat salary. i guess i never rly considerd it before cus all the silicon valley stuff susses me out but idk. im naturally really good at code + my only real dream in life is to be able to support others & redistribute wealth. like ive never had anything of my own to share but if i could actually do this & become the secure+charitable person i wish to be, i think i cld finally have some inner peace/sense of fulfillment. plus i cld still be a recluse ^_^

ok well i guess that my diary entry for now. im rly grateful to everyone on this site who is genuine & respectful towards me. i am really enjoying all my creative projects right now & i just dont want it to ever stop being fun just because the internet doesnt want it to be fun for me. i seriously wonder why artists are the number one targets right now, i mean not to get too conspiratorial but like, this is exactly what the CIA wants :/ wahtever....i have no agenda other than plur. but yeah, i might just start to distance myself more from posting anything other than my work. we'll see. just kno that i dnt want it to b this way. ilu guys

[iknaenmal]

tell me about ur new hyperfixation babe

YES THANK YOU OH MY GOD

OKAY. OKAY LETS SEE

theres. well theres this baby who is satans son. and theres also crowley everyone say hi crowley. okay so theres also two demons and actually you know what ill talk about crowley and aziraphale sorry i have been thinkijg about them nonstop for the past four days.

OKAY LETS SEE. (this time for real) crowley and aziraphale have been best friends for like. 6000 years i think? well. more like "best friends" with quotation marks idk if you get what i mean. like uhh off the top of my head i can remember two scenarios. one time aziraphale was. i dont remember where probably england ig. and he said ohh id love to eat some crepes!!!! and he went to paris bc apparently the only good crepes are made there. i think i should also mention that the french revolution was happening then. and so aziraphale went there all dapper and . well french people were decapitating members of nobility and they thought aziraphale looked a lot like an aristocrat. so they caught him and were going to decapitate him but then crowley appeared and saved him. i just mainly thought the crepes thing was funny tbh

AND THEN THE OTHER THING I REMEMBER. well there was a church. and. okay there were a lot of things happening there lets see. i honestlt dont remember exactly what was happening there but umm. aziraphale was hired by some guys to get all the prophetic books he could find including the. the nice and accurate prophecies of agnes nutter which he couldnt find. so turns out those two guys were actually umm. members of a mafia iirc? probably not but something like that. and they well they threatened to kill him for some reason. but aziraphale had been working with some random woman who came to help him. but turns out the woman was also a member of the midnight crew mafia and threatened to kill him as well. oh how the turn tables. BUT suddenly crowley appeared and was walking in quite a goofy manner bc the uhh. christian power of the church burned his feet or something. so well he introduced to the mafia guys and then he said oh yeah btw theres a missile coming right here and the guys were like wtf are you talking about they were gonna throw it somewhere else and oh rhis is confusing let me use quotation marks. so crowley said "yeah it would be very unlucky if it was thrown here. wink wink" and they were like "ummm i dont think what youre saying is true" and crowley said "ok i dont really care. also if the missile was thrown here my good friend aziraphale and i would die as well isnt that fun. we would need a miracle to survive to that. wink wink" so suddenly there was a missile and it exploded but crowley and aziraphale survived. bc of a miracle. probably bc aziraphale is an angel and can do that kinda stuff. and aziraphale is v thankful of that but then remembers the books which were rly important bc they were the first editions of those books. and crowley pulled out the suitcase the books were in from under a boulder and gave it to aziraphale. romantic music starts as aziraphale watches crowley walk away. flutters my eyelashes and i let out a dreamy sigh

Ok im gonna cut it here bc this is rly long but i think its pretty clear that im normal about them. completely normal

[jackienautism]

going 2 be real for a sec

i usually keep this stuff to myself since its super personal and i probably will just sound like a crazy person bu t i really just want to get something down and post it and MAYBE get some sort of like ? validation. that im not the only one who feels this way or does this LOL

so just. long story short. does anyone get like physically ill over seeing someone else like . engaging and doing "more" with a special interest slash interest youre really really into? like. just like 10 or os minutes ago somethting happened and i started lowkey shaking and shit (but maybe its just bc its real hot where i am rn but idk) and felt sick to my stomach all bc someone was engaging "more" with something i rly rly like and i just uuuuugh

ive had this feeling ever since i got into until dawn and the quarry lol...... this feeling has been occurring a lot less frequently than during like last year. which like. speaking of. when the quarry first came out the feeling came and WEEEENT....... ALLL THE TIME. like i wasnt even into the game that much yet but seeing other ppl engaging w/ and making content for it...... made me feel suuuper ill. or maybe was it when i first started getting into it? yeah i think it was when i first started hyperfixating. but anyway LOL IT WAS A TERRIBLE FEELING. AND IT HAPPENED SO OFTEN TOO

luckily its gotten a lot better in terms of the quarry. especiailly after joining tumblr and all. but until dawn? naaah its still very much there lol. as i said earlier, it doesnt happen as much as it used to (in regards to UD) but. it stilll happens. as i just fucking found out. ive settled down quite a bit now but good god

until dawn is such a dead fandom but theres just some things that when i see it it still makes me go wiiiild (negative). i dont know why. it makes feel so sick. and i dont hold it against anyone of course, it just affects me interacting w/ slash following people LOL! and it mainly has to do w/ sam and emily LMAO especiallly sam as ive come to find out.... i think its becasue ive projected sooo much of myself onto her that im like super protective and shit. like... shes not your fictional public character shes MINE. and thats not your public piece of media. its MINE. you know?

and its liike. i KNOW that there are ppl who are more into UD and have been into it longer than i have. i know that. and htat doesnt always affect me. but tthen therr are just osme other times where it seriously DOES and its just.... man. i wish i werent like this LMAO

i think thats like the. basis of it. im just. man. and its such a hard thing to shake off ): i know im just gonna have to "get over it" and "learn to live w/ it" but man!!!!!!

idk man. just seeing others "understanding" a character "more" than i do and seeing others do suuuuper in depth character analyses just..... ESP if its characters i rly relate to and basically projected every part of ,my being onto........ it makes me ill!!!!!! like genuinely!!!!!!!!!

and its like weird bc like. i was SUPER into mean girls the musical back in 2019 / 2020 and so forth. but i dont ever remember getting THIS BAD over others being "more" into it than i was. and this isnt just straight up jealousy. i know how that feels and its DEFINITELY not that. i truly dont know what makes until dawn / the quarry so different. maybe becasue this was the first time ive engaged more with the fandom? especially on tumblr? i dont know man. i dont kn ow

hopefully this makes sense. im just tired

[colealexmain]

damn, why u gotta be so rude about it lol

bc im not gonna lie i have felt nothing but nastiness and hostility from the bechloe fandom for the past however many years and it wasnt until i became interested in another fandom that more of those people came out of the woodwork and made me realize how fucked it is lol. yall rly dont like when people disagree with you! yall rly dont like when people have diff opinions! and frankly! im fucking sick of it! i dont wanna be involved with yall anymore. you wouldnt believe how many shitty messages im STILL getting since moving on. i am SO much happier now and i hope yall who are still sending anon hate (and some of u who are forgetting to press anon) find peace and realize that sometimes! people move on! and thats ok! i rly recommend that yall move on too. at least from me. leave me alone. go for a nice long walk. pet a dog. touch grass.

[scarlethallow160]

long-winded arcane s2 ramble/arcane in general ramble after act 1 (yes this contains spoilers)

let me preface by saying 1) i went into watching arcane knowing absolutely NOTHING about league of legends, i think i'd barely heard of jinx or seen her before and that was it? and 2) vi is my fav character of the show and honestly one of my fav characters in general and i am Specifically talking about her arcane iteration (im aware there are flaws in how they write/treat her character in arcane cuz they also bug me as well)

ok i LOVE arcane so much like season 1 is Amazing but there have always been like. weird consistency issues in the writing and with how season 2 is going they seem to be even further highlighted

like. again i LOVE vi so much bc i love characters with big hearts and how in spite of all the terrible shit she's been thru still strives to do good and how protective she is and bonus that she's a brawler cuz boy do i love women who can punch ppl out

but. god the whole enforcer thing is SO- it's so fucking infuriating and awful to see. i was so disappointed finding out vi is an enforcer in league cuz like. HOW? how can arcane vi grow up like that, see and experience what she has at the hands of enforcers/piltover....AND STILL FUCKING BECOME ONE OF THEM? and this brings me to one of my main issues albeit an unpopular opinion i know: her relationship with caitlyn

im ngl again i went into the show knowing Nothing about arcane so honestly. didnt rly care for caitlyn and i still rly dont (at least Definitely not to the extent of other characters) like im sorry im not saying shes a Bad character but i saw she was an enforcer i was like boo cop character but then. when her and vi meet etc i was like OH no...... theyre gonna pull the "people from opposite worlds fall in love and vi starts sympathizing/seeing past her being an enforcer/from piltover etc etc" and was absolutely right

im not faulting vi for coming to like caitlyn necessarily like she's the reason vi got out of prison and caitlyn genuinely shows care and concern for vi and her wellbeing. but she knew her for what is clearly a relatively short amount of time and Just Like That is willing to toss all of her beliefs aside and put on the badge for her?????????

i was happy she outright rejects the offer at first but OH my god. when maddie tells her the nice things caitlyn said and vi's like "omg really??" i was like HO YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS RIGHT NOW???? THATS ALL IT TAKES????????? vi i love you but WHAT THE FUCK

also. also. it made me SO sad and upset how quickly in act1 vi's like "yep powder's gone, time to hunt down and kill jinx" ??????? i get its bc she came to care for caitlyn and sympathizes that her mom was killed in the attack but.....vi, the council never gave a Shit about the undercity who cares about them (besides mel heehee)? at the VERY least this bit could've played out a lot more and show vi very begrudgingly coming to agree to the idea but jfc in the span of ONE episode, vi tosses everything aside bc...caitlyn said some nice things about her?? like vi accepting powder is gone and donning the badge should've been an ep3 thing. or end of ep2 AT THE VERY LEAST

and OMG the fact that she was okay terrorizing the undercity like that? gassing them?? like i get silco fucked shit up and everything got worse after vander died so there were a lot of scumbags but VI HELLO???? why couldnt we have gotten scenes of her like. being visibly upset and put off by what she agreed to do??

and i've seen other people more eloquently put this but this is also one of my big issues with cait//vi. it just...it really does Not make sense and the imbalance between them is so glaringly obvious. like i Hate how quickly vi warms up to her (an enforcer) and in that one scene in s1 is more aggressive to ekko than her and theyre already close to intimate on the bed scene after knowing each other for like a day???? VI GET UP????? i dont fault her for being unwilling to shoot caitlyn at jinx's request tho but jfc vi just way too quickly folds when it comes to caitlyn and i dont know why... like i understand caitlyn is the first person in Years to show vi genuine care in s1 after prison but still

like the writing for vi sometimes is just really. upsetting and questionable. how does she spend YEARS in prison getting beaten up constantly, starved, etc. and just seems perfectly adjusted when she's freed? why dont we get to see any of her trauma? its fitting that shes the type to keep it hidden/bottled away but... idk everyone always talks about jinx's trauma etc but Never vi's and i know it doesnt help that they portray her like everything is Fine like none of that awful shit affected her but vi's had such an awful life too i would like to see that addressed instead of everything always being framed as her fault

she just constantly gets the short end of the stick people dogpile on her for hitting powder (after watching their entire adoptive family die horribly, not saying hitting her was right but ppl for some reason ignore the "saw her brothers' dead bodies and watched her father-figure die" when judging her) and "abandoning her" (she walked away to cool off and then literally got kidnapped and thrown into prison for the next Several years) and ofc now seeming to doubledown on choosing caitlyn over jinx and BECOMING A GD ENFORCER its like the writers really want her to suffer!!!!! because after all that. caitlyn tosses vi aside and shes literally left with nothing lmaoaoao (<- sad laughing) bc she'll never really be welcome in piltover and zaun sure as hell wouldnt welcome her back if they knew she'd been frolicking with the other enforcers gassing them

i know this wont happen but GOD i wish after caitlyn hit her and abandoned her that vi would see the light and reconcile with jinx and join their little gang against piltover.... (i want to see her and sevika team up) like the creators/writers i think have said arcane is the new canon/characters in league arent exempt from dying SO..... if they can change the lore can they like. make it to where vi doesnt actually end up becoming an enforcer ha h ah aha it just really feels like a Huge disservice to her character in arcane.........

also i hate that ppl are like "ha ha vi gets a taste of her own medicine heehee" after caitlyn hits her and leaves in comparison to vi and powder in s1 cuz like.... the overall situations are not at ALL the same lmao? vi saw her whole family die and (wrongfully) lashed out at powder in her grief and anger and got kidnapped after going to cool down, like she was literally trying to run back to her before marcus stupidass grabbed her! caitlyn got mad that vi didnt want to risk a child's life and just straightup ditched her!!! it shows her and the others at the meeting ambessa puts together and doesnt seem bothered about ditching vi! its not the same!!!

act 1 of s2 was very exciting but SO much happens in 3 episodes there wasnt enough time for things to be fleshed out (why did No One react to the hextech weapons freaking out like that)

other things that bugged me:

jinx seems more....."mentally stable" than she did in s1? like just magically isnt hearing voices/seeing shit as much if at all? is it cuz she "fully accepted jinx and let powder die?"

im sorry but sevika should have absolutely folded caitlyn like an omelette in that fight. like in 5 seconds wtf she had her by the throat so many times too like???? babe thats an enforcer and the one that shot u in ur mechanical arm fuckin finish her already 😭

isha and jinx are cute but the kid is just kinda There and im sorry but her blocking jinx and shoving that gun is vi's face was kinda corny LMAOAO

also in s1 ekko was the one that sold jayce the stuff cuz thats how he knew about the place to tell vi and the others but i feel like he would have definitely recognized jayce lol idk a small detail but still

i love sevika i love that shes going to be one of the good guys in s2 but also it feels like she "flipped" way too quickly? granted she was there when jinx was growing up so i dont think her and jinx beginning to bond is a bad or unrealistic thing necessarily but in s1 she was introduced as what would clearly be one of the antagonists and like almost Immediately in s2 its "no shes a good guy now :)"

again why did NO ONE really react to the hextech freaking out like that????

also. im very VERY excited for pit fighter vi but now i hate that it seems like her main reason for crashing out like that is "my cop gf did bad cop things and ditched me when i stopped her" and not like.... "i compromised my morals and beliefs for someone belonging to the group of oppressors directly responsible for the terrible shit in my life thinking she was different but, surprise surprise, was proven wrong and almost readily killed my sister for her and have definitely ruined that relationship for good" but ok

this is getting too long and doesnt completely make sense but idk i love this show but sad to say it is definitely not without its flaws

[leoolol2]

29/09/2024

I wasn't expecting something this big, but here is my second day of writing.

anotação pro meu psicólogo: o senhor pode me fazer um relatório pra eu ir pro psicólogo da minha mãe, por favor? ela queria que eu fosse porque eu realmente tô com dificuldade de estudar mesmo estudando fora do meu quarto, e ela achava que o meu quarto era o problema. :) obrigado.

Well, I can't sleep. Like, at all. So here I am, already writing this in 2:30 AM! I probably will have an all-nighter and wtv, I should be productive tonight.

I was a bit productive, doing some of my math homework and watching some mvs from my fav bands until 4 am and then just passing out. I then woke up at 9, and my mom wrote some of my fav bands on my nails! i forgot to mention yesterday that i painted my own nails at night. (mcr and p!atd). i also took a bath in the morning and washed my hair; something i think i havent done for about 1 or 2 weeks? i think im getting worse, mental health wise, but i dont know. i'll update this once the afternoon ends. I also ranted a bunch about mcr and fob to my mom, and she complained about linkin park to me. i love my mom and having similar interests with her! My brother came to visit us today! :)

I ate some actual meal today: broccoli, rice, just a bit grinded meat, sweet potato, and normal potato. The broccoli tasted like shit. I also drank peach tea. After lunch, we went back home and got my Nina the Killer cosplay jacket to a dressmaker so that she could put a zipper on it. We then went to get some icecream at McDonald's! I ranted a bunch about MCR again but this time to my brother. :)

After that we went back home and my family decided to put up the shelf I had on my floor for the longest time. It's a bit crooked, but I don't mind, honestly. I now have a bunch of shit I need to put up on the shelf once more, though. It's all on my bed, making me barely able to sit here and write this on my PC. Well, I should put up my stuff on my "new" shelf.

after scrolling through tumblr a bunch my mom did my nails for me. it was fun. i only got a top coat added because my black nail polish is on the verge of dying but its fine! i'll buy some later. my nails are not shiny, though.

i did some of my hw, and also got my piano out of under my bed! my friend also got me in contact w this russian boy, i think hes cute. hes in brazil too, so i rly hope he replies to my dm on insta.

im so so soo sleepy, so im gonna go sleep after i finish at least this teacher's hw. its 21:47, for the record. i didn't stay up that late today. still, im gonna post this. i hope whoever reads this has a good day!

꒰꒰・┄┄┄┄・rants section・┄┄┄┄・꒱꒱

this is a section i made up to see if any time i have any rants, i come here!

so it will be more in depth than the actual casual diary. (i also will mention when exactly i wrote it!)

12:52. thinking about how my therapist tells me to act as my own best friend. i dont know how, genuinely. i cannot. maybe i can suck my own dick sometimes and tell myself im so hot and the best person in the world, but thats obviously not true. its not like i feel like that all the time, either. from a day to another i suddenly feel like the worst person alive. its not as if someone tells me that i am, or something triggers me. i just feel that out of no where. but whatever.

16:22. My dad doesn't understand that yelling at my dog doesn't do anything. It just makes her madder and more pissed off at the world and makes me actually feel sick and about to cry. I want to protect her from everything. I don't want to be here, I want to go away with her and fuck everything else. I won't be missed probably anyway. The only people that would miss me is my online friends, who doesn't really know me in real life. Well, I guess some that have this blog can now know more about me. :)

16:26. Thinking about the ripped up letter. I wasted 2 hours of my night writing that for a girl who didn't even want me romantically. She just wanted to have fun, someone to kiss with no feelings truly attached. I guess that would be fun if my feelings didn't feel so extreme. Someone I love can become someone I despise just because of a small mistake they didn't really mean to do. Well, I try not to be too mad at them for that, but this isn't the case of that anyway. I wanted her to be my girlfriend but she didn't want to have anything romantic. She practically cut ties and said that she had shit for yesterday when she used to be so excited to see me some time ago. Maybe it was an excuse that she made. Either way, we're not talking. I don't really care about her. I care about the time and words of mine that she wasted.

17:46. i was listening to music and back to the old house reminds me of them so much. fuck. i miss frank.

17:59. i feel too feminine, doing my nails and liking girly things. my face is too feminine, my voice is too feminine. everything about me, the way i walk, talk, read out loud, interact with my friends. absolutely everything. i want to cry thinking about it because i dont want to. maybe this is an internalized issue of some sort. i really need to address this in therapy, probably.

18:17. I just noticed im going back to my "scenecore"/crunkcore phase. fuck. one of my worst, honestly.

18:30. just wanna mention how amazing i feel rn:3 feeling on top of the world is so good !!

18:58. winderson is making me rage. makes me want to punch him or throw it somewhere. but he's my baby, i cant do that.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

dria i ran out of tags for this 💔💔💔 so im just gonna write out all my thoughts!! absolutely ADORED this piece <333

ok so honestly i feel a little bit ill. PDHDJDH IM JUST??? kinda awestruck LIKE… the way u wrote this……. rearranged my brain a lil.

i know ive said it before but ur writing rly is so so pretty. the way u describe emotions and movements and just… Everything rly had me so hooked!!!! and i adore the way u characterize sugu… he feels so real and kinda vulnerable? like he really is just that lonely boy deep down. who just wanted someone to reach out for him :(

AND READERRRR WOW. i was so enamored w them i love love LOVE when writers take the time to give their reader a distinct personality/vibe and u did that so effortlessly…. theyre so fun and interesting and such a cool contrast to sugu!!!!

"i broke the lock." you reply with a shrug - and the two of you mirror each other's grin.

THEYRE SO FUNNY SPDJDK… and the dynamic here!! between them!!!! im genuinely sooo in love w it dria. its unspoken and affectionate and comfortable and playful… u can really sense their history!! so vividly!!!!!

"wouldn't want anyone comin' to snatch you in the middle of the night..." 

”isn't that what you came to do?" 

^ LIKE???? THEYRE SOOOO……….

”he's never been the type to mistreat gifts. especially a gift from you.”

🥺🥺 and this…. it made me go so soft LOL the fact that he keeps the picture frame… sugu will always be a big ol softie to me. a sentimental sap. i rly do think he was lonely after he left!!! :<

but!! back to reader!!! them wanting to save sugu…. aaaa idk its just so… refreshing to have a reader that takes that assertive role!! didn't you want me to come take you away, suguru?……. T_T sob.

but honestly more than anything… the entire final convo????? i literally died dria its so GOOD. sorry in advance im abt to copy paste 50% of this drabble’s dialogue PDBDBD I WAS SO MESMERIZED BY IT OK…… 💔💔

"i have to get there first," he whispers, and the raw emotion in his voice almost makes you recoil in shock. 

”where’s there?” (…) "tell me, suguru. is there the place you die alone on this crusade? is there the place you gave up everything for?"

(is there the place you'll finally be happy? happier than you were with me?

what, was i not strong enough to take us there together?)

"it's catharsis," he rasps, dipping his head, tip of his nose grazing the curve of your jawline, and you watch as he screws his eyes shut, in a world of his own. "there is release from this — this hell of an existence — this sinkhole of a world."

JUST. (MUFFLED SCREAMING) DRIAAAA 💔💔💔 this genuinely killed me i fell to my KNEES. incredibly normal abt this. 

nono bc u have the biggest brain ever. like…. catharsis traditionally being the endpoint of a tragedy…. where the misguided hero gets what they deserve………. (explodes) can u tell im starting to lose it. im in love w everything abt this. geto is just soooooo protagonist of an ancient tragedy coded…… so doomed by the narrative…….

also the fact that he RASPS it??????? stop. dont make me think abt this man’s voice i cant take it 😭😭

and aaaaa ’this sinkhole of a world’…………….. i cant tell u how much i adore this choice of words

AND THEN READER AGAIN…. them being so headstrong and decisive and also a little misguided maybe? in a ”lets just watch everything burn and be happy” way…

"forget the world. (…) where being found is the only road to take — what do you see?” 

”you. and me. and there is no world — only us."

THIS DIALOGUE??? FLOORED me. shattered me. AND READER PULLING HIS HAIIIRRRRR????? oh i love them so much theyre so fun and interesting and subversive hhhh

"then the world just has to go then."

^ AND AND AND… THIS LINEEEEEEEEEEE DRIA……. wowowowow. wow. the visceral reaction this gave me. u dont understand.

i said it already but i rly do adore the reader/character dynamic here :’3 both of them choosing to reject the world… and reader pushing sugu to leave everything behind!! its SUCH an interesting concept to me. it also rly DOES read like a stsg fic LMAOO

AAA this got long but i just!! love this <3333 genuinely made me a bit insane (as u can probably tell PDJDJD)… tysm for writing it!!! <333

folie a deux — geto suguru.

"and here i was, thinking you didn't have a heart."

suguru freezes, the cigarette he was nursing just moments before you walked in has slipped between his fingers, dissipating into ash beneath his feet.

your gaze lingers on a downturned picture frame on his coffee table, the rubber stand at the back is just as stable as it was the day you bought the frame for him — maybe shame finally caught up to suguru.

"you're persistent." he murmurs beneath his breath. and his gaze follows yours, he has to hold back the urge to turn the photo frame upright, he's never been the type to mistreat gifts. especially a gift from you.

it's been a long time.

and yet, it's like nothing has changed. but everything has at the same time.

"i locked the door," suguru mumbles and despite himself he crosses the threshold to meet you halfway, no more than a few feet between you two. "i broke the lock." you reply with a shrug, and the two of your mirror each other's grin.

"you should really tell your landlord about that," you say, and the distance between you and suguru grows smaller and smaller. "wouldn't want anyone comin' to snatch you in the middle of the night..." your words trail off, and he towers over you.

he's taller than he was before. he looks like he hasn't slept — or maybe it's the cigarettes, you don't know. you wonder if he's changed much on the inside. does he still like sour candy? does he still keep that one stretched out hair tie in his pocket?

does he still...

"isn't that what you came to do?"

suguru's voice comes out in a whisper, and you can taste him. he's so close you can feel his cursed energy thrumming in your veins.

you half expected he'd chase you away. tell you that he left for a reason, that he didn't want to be found. and yet, when you look at him, you see that same scared teenage boy.

didn't you want me to come take you away, suguru?

he doesn't wait for you to say anything, he already knows.

"i told you i wasn't ready." he says, dark eyes boring into your soul, a shiver running up your spine. liar, you've always been good at pretending to be okay, suguru.

"you also said you didn't want to be alive anymore, that you couldn't live in this world," you're past reasoning, and you lift your head to meet his gaze with your own pointed stare. "that you couldn't live with me—" but in suguru's mind, your eyes give you away. you're pleading.

"in a world like this— i'm living for you."

"then die already!"

he pauses, mouth agape. and he looks at you, hands falling limp at his side. "i have to get there first," he whispers, and the raw emotion in his voice almost makes you recoil in shock.

consume. consume. consume. consume—

everybody's so wretched and twisted in this world. monkeys and sorcerers and sorcerers and monkeys. they're all the same.

you're the same.

"where's there?" you press, and just as you move to get a step closer, his larger palm clasps around your wrist, stopping you. "tell me, suguru. is there the place you die alone on this crusade? is there the place you gave up everything for?"

is there the place you'll finally be happy? happier than you were with me?

what, was i not strong enough to take us there together?

"it's catharsis," he rasps, dipping his head, tip of his nose grazing the curve of your jawline, and you watch as he screws his eyes shut, in a world of his own. "there is release from this — this hell of an existence — this sinkhole of a world."

but we lived in this world too, didn't we?

we lived in this world together, suguru.

you and i.

"forget the world," you say, and he clenches your wrist a little tighter. despite this your other hand finds the nape of his neck, dipping under the collar of his shirt. "forget jujutsu and everything we learned. forget everything you know. forget what we were made for."

"where being found is the only road to take — what do you see, suguru?"

"you."

you grab a fistful of his hair and tug, his head lolls back and he looks down at you with hooded eyes, and your gaze meets him in tow. "what do you see?"

"you," he repeats, and it's weaker this time, his voice is breaking. "and me. and there is no world — only us."

"only us?" you repeat, and he leans in, his tongue traces your bottom lip. "only us," he whispers, and your mouths meet in a kiss like none you've shared before.

"then the world just has to go then."

notes ; wrote this during my soci lecture, it reads like a satosugu fic im so ill rn