#i did Not know what folie a deux was so i had to look it up PSJDJD but!! so clever and pretty :>
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therevengeoffrankenstein · 8 months ago
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the implications....
folie a deux meaning / folie a deux album cover / pete's bear hat(s)
#myevilposts#pete wentz#also the teddy bear rug would be fun to mention in this discussion but these ones are more serious.#the thing with pw is that sometimes he does things that are so devious and strategic and genius and sneaky and poignant#and other times it just seems that way and was actually just him being silly.#this goes both ways btw.#like a lot of mania era stuff i feel was mocked as him being silly but was actually deep and then a lot of older stuff#that people obsess over dissecting was actually Not That Deep on his account at least.#it's kinda not his fault that he's a cartoon character. kinda. but he knows how to lean into it.#pw understands camp better than 99% of users on this website tbh.#fall out boy#also pete and bebe wearing matching bear hats during hiatus. is like exactly what i'm talking about. lol.#the implication being that the bear/becoming a bear represents embracing the madness and becoming one with the grizzly bear#that the human in the bear costume is carrying on the folie cover.#i feel like it's not a coincidence that the guy looks like pete too. it might be but i always figured it was intentional.#the grizzly bear/real life equivalent to the madness of folie a deux as a condition is open to interpretation more#i think. obviously it could represent the co dependence between pete and patrick. but it could also#represent pete's marriage as a whole to the band/his work.#i think it's most noteworthy again that he wore the bear hat matching with bebe DURING HIATUS.#similarly to the stump club shirt i feel like it's pretty clear he was incredibly torn up about the hiatus.#maybe it's that pete had a co dependent relationship with his public image/identity within the scope of fob's fame.#A LOT of black cards calls back to fob / is in response to or commentary of his fame from fob.#because of course it did/was. fob was intrinsic to his celebrityhood. and that celebrityhood obviously was intrinsic to him.#this is not to downplay the other aspects of his identity. the opposite actually.#especially considering that his public image was so skewed and dumbed down and he was rightfully very upset about that#and that is very prevalent/important/vital i think to understanding things like black cards as a whole.
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dria i ran out of tags for this 💔💔💔 so im just gonna write out all my thoughts!! absolutely ADORED this piece <333
ok so honestly i feel a little bit ill. PDHDJDH IM JUST??? kinda awestruck LIKE�� the way u wrote this……. rearranged my brain a lil.
i know ive said it before but ur writing rly is so so pretty. the way u describe emotions and movements and just… Everything rly had me so hooked!!!! and i adore the way u characterize sugu… he feels so real and kinda vulnerable? like he really is just that lonely boy deep down. who just wanted someone to reach out for him :(
AND READERRRR WOW. i was so enamored w them i love love LOVE when writers take the time to give their reader a distinct personality/vibe and u did that so effortlessly…. theyre so fun and interesting and such a cool contrast to sugu!!!!
"i broke the lock." you reply with a shrug - and the two of you mirror each other's grin.
THEYRE SO FUNNY SPDJDK… and the dynamic here!! between them!!!! im genuinely sooo in love w it dria. its unspoken and affectionate and comfortable and playful… u can really sense their history!! so vividly!!!!!
"wouldn't want anyone comin' to snatch you in the middle of the night..." 
”isn't that what you came to do?" 
^ LIKE???? THEYRE SOOOO……….
”he's never been the type to mistreat gifts. especially a gift from you.”
🥺🥺 and this…. it made me go so soft LOL the fact that he keeps the picture frame… sugu will always be a big ol softie to me. a sentimental sap. i rly do think he was lonely after he left!!! :<
but!! back to reader!!! them wanting to save sugu…. aaaa idk its just so… refreshing to have a reader that takes that assertive role!! didn't you want me to come take you away, suguru?……. T_T sob.
but honestly more than anything… the entire final convo????? i literally died dria its so GOOD. sorry in advance im abt to copy paste 50% of this drabble’s dialogue PDBDBD I WAS SO MESMERIZED BY IT OK…… 💔💔
"i have to get there first," he whispers, and the raw emotion in his voice almost makes you recoil in shock. 
”where’s there?” (…) "tell me, suguru. is there the place you die alone on this crusade? is there the place you gave up everything for?"
(is there the place you'll finally be happy? happier than you were with me?
what, was i not strong enough to take us there together?)
"it's catharsis," he rasps, dipping his head, tip of his nose grazing the curve of your jawline, and you watch as he screws his eyes shut, in a world of his own. "there is release from this — this hell of an existence — this sinkhole of a world."
JUST. (MUFFLED SCREAMING) DRIAAAA 💔💔💔 this genuinely killed me i fell to my KNEES. incredibly normal abt this. 
nono bc u have the biggest brain ever. like…. catharsis traditionally being the endpoint of a tragedy…. where the misguided hero gets what they deserve………. (explodes) can u tell im starting to lose it. im in love w everything abt this. geto is just soooooo protagonist of an ancient tragedy coded…… so doomed by the narrative…….
also the fact that he RASPS it??????? stop. dont make me think abt this man’s voice i cant take it 😭😭
and aaaaa ’this sinkhole of a world’…………….. i cant tell u how much i adore this choice of words
AND THEN READER AGAIN…. them being so headstrong and decisive and also a little misguided maybe? in a ”lets just watch everything burn and be happy” way…
"forget the world. (…) where being found is the only road to take — what do you see?” 
”you. and me. and there is no world — only us."
THIS DIALOGUE??? FLOORED me. shattered me. AND READER PULLING HIS HAIIIRRRRR????? oh i love them so much theyre so fun and interesting and subversive hhhh
"then the world just has to go then."
^ AND AND AND… THIS LINEEEEEEEEEEE DRIA……. wowowowow. wow. the visceral reaction this gave me. u dont understand.
i said it already but i rly do adore the reader/character dynamic here :’3 both of them choosing to reject the world… and reader pushing sugu to leave everything behind!! its SUCH an interesting concept to me. it also rly DOES read like a stsg fic LMAOO
AAA this got long but i just!! love this <3333 genuinely made me a bit insane (as u can probably tell PDJDJD)… tysm for writing it!!! <333
folie a deux — geto suguru.
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"and here i was, thinking you didn't have a heart."
suguru freezes, the cigarette he was nursing just moments before you walked in has slipped between his fingers, dissipating into ash beneath his feet.
your gaze lingers on a downturned picture frame on his coffee table, the rubber stand at the back is just as stable as it was the day you bought the frame for him — maybe shame finally caught up to suguru.
"you're persistent." he murmurs beneath his breath. and his gaze follows yours, he has to hold back the urge to turn the photo frame upright, he's never been the type to mistreat gifts. especially a gift from you.
it's been a long time.
and yet, it's like nothing has changed. but everything has at the same time.
"i locked the door," suguru mumbles and despite himself he crosses the threshold to meet you halfway, no more than a few feet between you two. "i broke the lock." you reply with a shrug, and the two of your mirror each other's grin.
"you should really tell your landlord about that," you say, and the distance between you and suguru grows smaller and smaller. "wouldn't want anyone comin' to snatch you in the middle of the night..." your words trail off, and he towers over you.
he's taller than he was before. he looks like he hasn't slept — or maybe it's the cigarettes, you don't know. you wonder if he's changed much on the inside. does he still like sour candy? does he still keep that one stretched out hair tie in his pocket?
does he still...
"isn't that what you came to do?"
suguru's voice comes out in a whisper, and you can taste him. he's so close you can feel his cursed energy thrumming in your veins.
you half expected he'd chase you away. tell you that he left for a reason, that he didn't want to be found. and yet, when you look at him, you see that same scared teenage boy.
didn't you want me to come take you away, suguru?
he doesn't wait for you to say anything, he already knows.
"i told you i wasn't ready." he says, dark eyes boring into your soul, a shiver running up your spine. liar, you've always been good at pretending to be okay, suguru.
"you also said you didn't want to be alive anymore, that you couldn't live in this world," you're past reasoning, and you lift your head to meet his gaze with your own pointed stare. "that you couldn't live with me—" but in suguru's mind, your eyes give you away. you're pleading.
"in a world like this— i'm living for you."
"then die already!"
he pauses, mouth agape. and he looks at you, hands falling limp at his side. "i have to get there first," he whispers, and the raw emotion in his voice almost makes you recoil in shock.
consume. consume. consume. consume—
everybody's so wretched and twisted in this world. monkeys and sorcerers and sorcerers and monkeys. they're all the same.
you're the same.
"where's there?" you press, and just as you move to get a step closer, his larger palm clasps around your wrist, stopping you. "tell me, suguru. is there the place you die alone on this crusade? is there the place you gave up everything for?"
is there the place you'll finally be happy? happier than you were with me?
what, was i not strong enough to take us there together?
"it's catharsis," he rasps, dipping his head, tip of his nose grazing the curve of your jawline, and you watch as he screws his eyes shut, in a world of his own. "there is release from this — this hell of an existence — this sinkhole of a world."
but we lived in this world too, didn't we?
we lived in this world together, suguru.
you and i.
"forget the world," you say, and he clenches your wrist a little tighter. despite this your other hand finds the nape of his neck, dipping under the collar of his shirt. "forget jujutsu and everything we learned. forget everything you know. forget what we were made for."
"where being found is the only road to take — what do you see, suguru?"
"you."
you grab a fistful of his hair and tug, his head lolls back and he looks down at you with hooded eyes, and your gaze meets him in tow. "what do you see?"
"you," he repeats, and it's weaker this time, his voice is breaking. "and me. and there is no world — only us."
"only us?" you repeat, and he leans in, his tongue traces your bottom lip. "only us," he whispers, and your mouths meet in a kiss like none you've shared before.
"then the world just has to go then."
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notes ; wrote this during my soci lecture, it reads like a satosugu fic im so ill rn
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prael · 8 months ago
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Rendezvous
part 5 of folie à deux. Masterlist
male reader x Rei and Liz of IVE (ft. sakura, wonyoung, yujin, etc.)
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7
words: 12.2k
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rendezvous - a meeting at an agreed time and place
-
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Gaeul pulls up her underwear then turns to the other two girls and asks, "is Rei running late?"
"She's probably humping another stranger." Wonyoung retorts, laughing a little under her breath, hiding her smile from Gaeul by turning toward the mirror. She picks up the red lipstick laid out on the vanity table and brushes it across her plump lips.
"She's not coming here," Yujin explains. "She's going to the party with Liz."
"And we're okay with that?" Wonyoung raises an eyebrow and looks at Yujin through the mirror.
"Don't worry, I already added Liz to the list to make up for it."
"Really? Just like that?" Gaeul is quick to speak with a little worry in her voice.
"Really," Yujin smirks. "Also, I think Rei is giving up on the whole fucking strangers thing. She had another disappointment today."
"Oh right. That explains it." Wonyoung places the lipstick down and picks up the earrings laid out in front of her. "She did ask me if she could borrow our friend for a night and get some good dick."
"She did?" Yujin's interest seems peaked by the comment, as she casts her gaze out and off into the distance.
"Yes," Wonyoung punctuates her statement with a firm nod. "Wouldn't surprise me if she already hopped on that this afternoon."
"I was with him this afternoon, Wony, so..." Yujin trails off.
"Did he rush off?" Gaeul asks and Yujin frowns slightly at the thought of you dumping her to go fuck her friend. "At least he's in safer hands with Rei instead of that slut from the bar," Gaeul utters her words through an aggravated grumble as she sits in her chair, leaning in toward her mirror to finish the final touches to her makeup.
"Slut?" Yujin asks, picking up a bra from her dresser. She pulls the straps over her bare shoulders, slips her arms through, and clasps it behind her back.
"Minju."
"Minju Minju? Kim Minju?" The half-naked Yujin looks at Wonyoung for confirmation.
"Yes," Wonyoung says as elegantly as ever, standing tall and turning away from the mirror. "Now, will one of you help me into this dress?"
"Wait." Yujin raises a hand. "He was at a bar with Minju? Drinking? When?"
"Yesterday," Gaeul says as she stands up and collects Wonyoung's dress and carries it over to the naked and waiting woman.
Wonyoung is waiting with her hands on her bare hips. Her slender body is smooth and exposed. She is a thing of perfect symmetry with her flat stomach and small but perky breasts. "Yeah, and they were doing a lot more than drinking."
"Wonyoung," Yujin steps toward her, one hand on her elbow and the other softly clenched by her chest. "What are you saying?"
"Let's just say..." Gaeul pauses to let Wonyoung step into her dress and then she drags it up and lets her slide her arms into it. "A lot of bars smell. But most of them aren't locked when they should be open and don't smell of sex when they finally let you in."
Wonyoung settles into her dress, and Gaeul fits it tightly to her frame. Wonyoung lifts her hair up and lets it fall over her shoulders. "You should hurry up if you want to make the most of him, Yujin, before everyone you know has used him, and you'll be the last." Wonyoung looks at Gaeul who's still touching the dress up behind her. "Well, almost the last."
"Who says I want to..."
"Please Yujin." Wonyoung interrupts. "I'm sure the teasing is fun and all, but trust me, nothing compares to a good, proper fucking." Wonyoung stretches her arm to the dresser to pick up her necklace which's expensive enough to put a pair of twins through university three times over. Wonyoung places it against her neck, holding the ends out for Gaeul. She bunches her hair up again for Gaeul to clasp it. "Am I right, Gaeul?"
Gaeul keeps silent while she works. Fastening the hook and letting it drop along the nape of Wonyoung's pale white neck and hang just over her collarbones.
"I have plenty of time," Yujin says. "We're keeping him around, aren't we?" She flips her head as she runs her hand through her hair. She slips a finger beneath one of the bra's straps and adjusts its position on her shoulder. 
"Well, that is the plan." Wonyoung nods after letting her hair fall again. “He doesn’t have much choice now.”
"Oh, he will have a choice,” Yujin speaks through a smirk. “But the result will be the same."
-
"I like things dirty. Natural. That’s just me."
That's her response to you asking exactly how she lives in the hellhole you just left. An answer as serious as you will ever get from Minju.
There's an awkward couple of seconds where you check to see the driver's reaction and you lock eyes through his rear view. The narrow cut of his face doesn't give you the full expression and you can't tell if he's disturbed or impressed. After a moment it passes and you focus back on the girl to your side.
"Where do you even eat?" you ask.
"Take-out, duh." You both share a look and Minju is smiling with her eyes. "I just put it on my lap when I sit down."
"But where do you sit? The ground?"
"Preferably on your co—"
"Hey, we're close now." You cut her off before she makes it even more uncomfortable for the driver.
"Swing a right here," Minju calls out to him. He shoots another look back in the mirror, this time his furrowed brows show his annoyance. "And pull up on the left."
Minju telling the guy how to do his job is actually a very Minju thing to do. As unappreciated as it may be.
You check your watch. Fifteen minutes late. Great. Hopefully, you can slip in and the girls won't notice. You could play it off cool, say you've been there all along and they must have missed you. You would have to slip away from Minju though, she would give the game away.
Maybe she reads your face, or the silence might have been a clue. Minju taps your shoulder and tells you not to worry. Stop caring about what others think and just walk in like you own the place.
You step out first and rush around to get to Minju's door. She scoffs as you open it. "And they say chivalry is dead." Her words come paired with a grin. You offer your hand to hers which she takes and uses to help pull her up. She straightens herself out, and checks to see that her skirt is all aligned before looking up at you.
You close the door and the driver is quick to pull away. "Hey, Minju, maybe you can go in first and then I will—"
"Shh." She locks her arm around yours at the elbow. "Stop. Just walk."
She pulls, tugging you alongside her, you adjust your footing to walk alongside, arm in arm, as she guides you up the stairs to the man at the door. Minju rests her head on your shoulder. You don't ask, don't protest. You can feel how easy it is, with her walking at your side, and so you say nothing. Just like she wants.
The six-foot-four bouldering giant is the first to speak, "Minju. Haven't seen you here for a while. Welcome back." His wide face, chiselled with age and experience, splits in a welcoming grin.
Minju softly bows her head and you follow her lead. "Been busy," is the reply she gives.
The security gives one single nod and replies, "As they say, a busy person doesn't have time to be unhappy." He grins even wider this time.
Minju ignores the impromptu attempt at philosophy and you both pass by into the house. The place is huge; of course it is—it's a mansion in the hills. But even from the outside, you couldn't have expected this.
Straight ahead is a huge, curved stairwell. On either side of you, it opens into a series of corridors already full of a smattering of guests. Music pours from off to the left. The unmistakable rhythm of that one K-pop song you heard all last week but still don't know the name of. People are sitting around, lounges filled with men in the latest fashion and women dressed to perfection. Most if not all with drinks in hand.
"Let's get us a drink." Minju pulls gently on your arm. "I'm thinking tequila."
There's not much else you can do right now. Your hope of making a low-key appearance, blending in with the crowd and slipping through unnoticed, is completely lost now as Minju takes a long, slow and deliberate approach through the place. She keeps your arm linked with hers, and as she saunters, her stride is swayed.
You feel the call to arms. You straighten your back, broaden your shoulders and strut like you belong. A few heads turn. Probably more for her than you, but the confidence still builds. There's not a single person in sight you think who could question whether you belong or not. The trick, you realise, is not to doubt yourself. Just walk in like you own the place. Minju’s words echo in your mind.
Two girls catch your gaze from the corner of your eye. They have their hands by their mouth, sharing unheard whispers while looking in your direction as you walk by. It takes a few moments, to narrow them down and figure it out. It's the two girls who fought outside school the other day, clearly having settled their differences.
You both enter the kitchen to find a young woman wrestling a bottle of champagne. Rei struggles over and over until it eventually pops, much to her delight. She lets out a loud squeal of surprise and looks over at two of her companions who took a step back when it popped.
Rei's friend stands just behind her, stifling an unheard giggle. She takes the bottle from Rei's hands and begins to pour. Golden bubbles into a set of four flutes.
That's when Rei finally notices you. She screams some incoherent words and throws her arms around you, almost knocking you off balance to the floor and taking Minju with you. The girl is already drunk.
"Oh my god! Come, come, uncle, meet my friends."
"Uncle?" Minju remarks.
"Don’t ask," you whisper from the corner of your mouth before Rei pulls the pair of you along.
"This is Liz." She points to the lady with the silver-purple hair, holding the bottle of champagne. She wears a thin black lace choker on her neck above the low cut of her top. As well as a pair of black leather trousers that run into her heeled boots. Rei throws her arms around Liz's waist. "Hey Liz, did I tell you about my new sexy uncle who saves me like a knight?"
Her question meets a look of confusion and a narrow-eyed glance at you. The girl smiles at you, in a forced what-the-fuck-is-happening kind of way. She says something to Rei that you can't quite make out over the sounds of conversation around you.
One of the other girls picks up her glass before introducing herself. "Sakura." She holds out an elegant hand. A pretty girl with delicate features, a flawless complexion, and pink waves that flow over her shoulders. You reach out and take her hand. "Welcome to my house. I don't believe we have met." Her accent is lyrical and pronounced, with the right amount of cute.
You introduce yourself and barely finish doing so before Minju takes over. "Long time no see. Both of you. Come here Nako, Kkura." Minju breaks her lock with your arm to go embrace the two girls. She hugs the girls with affection. No love lost between them.
She's asking them a series of the usual questions. How's life? How are you doing? What happened to the person with the name you don't recognise? Have they moved to Australia? They did? How many months ago?
Then Sakura turns her attention to you.
"It is good you have a new friend." She tells Minju. "Did you meet him at a shoot?"
You think that's a compliment, at least.
Rei laughs before Minju corrects Sakura, "he's in my class, Kkura. He isn't a model." Rei tells her, still laughing. "I see what you're saying though, it's the eyes. Put him on an ad and I'm buying."
"I like his cheekbones," Kkura responds.
"I'm right here, ladies." They're talking like you're not in the room and your face is starting to burn.
"Sorry." Kkura's voice is sugary sweet. Her smile and coy gaze even more so. "Enjoy your night. I have more guests to greet." Sakura spins and struts away with Nako in tow, before stopping beside two men that seem a little lost.
"Come." Rei tugs your arm, almost spilling her drink on you. "What are you two drinking?" she asks, not waiting for a response.
"I'll just have a beer—"
"Tequila." Minju doesn't miss a beat.
"I don't think there's tequila..." Rei steps toward the liquor bottles and Liz silently follows.
"Ugh." Minju doesn't try to hide her disdain. "The champagne then." She looks over and picks up two full champagne flutes from the table.
"Did you two get a card yet?" Rei asks.
"Card?" you ask back.
"No, we haven't," Minju says before turning to you and handing you a glass. "Didn't anyone tell you? That's the rule tonight. Everyone has to take a card with a challenge that they have to complete, with evidence or a witness. Anyone who fails to do it by eleven has to do a forfeit."
"Does everyone know what's on the cards or what the forfeit is?"
"Nope," she winks, before downing her glass of champagne. "That's the fun. So what did you girls get?"
"Mine was easy," Rei says. "All I had to do was kiss a guy wearing white. Did that as soon as I came in." Rei points off into a distance somewhere. You can't make out where the finger ends its aim.
"And you, Liz?" you ask, and she avoids any eye contact with you.
"She might have to forfeit." Rei laughs. "Tell them what you got." She pats her friend on the back.
"Um, I— I have to... finger a woman..." She just about squeezes the words from her lips before she quickly takes a drink. Hiding her burning face behind a hand.
Minju's eyes open wide and you hear Rei giggle into her drink. "Have you ever?" you ask, and there's no need for her to answer you. The look of anxiety and panic on her face tells you everything.
"I offered to help," says Rei. "You know, as a friend. Still stands by the way."
"Thanks..." Liz forces the response through her covered mouth.
"What other stuff is in there?" you ask, pondering the possibilities.
"Liz probably got one of the hardest." Rei shrugs. "Some of them are just about drinking or other stupid dares."
"Or she got the best one," Minju comments. "We better get ours." Minju slides her arm around yours again.
Rei leans into you before you leave, whispering, "If it's a tough one, I can help." Then she slips away and Minju pulls on your arm.
"Thanks, girls, see you soon."
The rest of the crowd fills the rooms you walk through. People are already on the dance floor, holding their drinks as they bounce, or holding onto other people as the rhythm guides their bodies together.
In the next room, there are two tables, each with a person behind and people crowding at each of them. "So these are the cards, right? I hope I get an easy one..."
"I hope you get a tough one. What if you have to suck a cock?" Minju asks.
"Then I take a forfeit."
"Okay but what if the forfeit is that you have to suck two cocks?" She jokes and laughs.
"Funny..."
"Alright. I'm going first."
You're just about to follow her in when you hear your name called from behind. You know the voice without looking back, a smooth melody in song and one that tenses your body up. As Minju walks away, Yujin walks toward you.
You turn and there she is. Wow. It's only been a few hours since you saw her last, and yet, like every other time you see her, she blows you away. The red dress is, honestly, amazing. Fitting tightly at the waist, flattering her shape and highlighting those hips. As ever, she gave the outfit her own personal flair, wearing it a little different than when she tried it on earlier, with one strap off the shoulder now. The thing about Yujin is that, sure, someone could wear the same clothes as her, but they could never wear them like she does.
She has changed her hair too, pinning part of it up behind a piece of jewelled decoration. And then there's that smile. Perfect, dazzling. Full lips curled slightly at the sides, pearlescent teeth peeking through. The sparkling glint of her deep eyes looking up at yours.
She sees through the silence. "What's wrong? What are you staring at?" Her little giggle comes with a poke to the centre of your chest. It brings your focus back to reality. "Don't I look okay?"
"Yeah— of course— Yujin—" You say her name as if she isn't the absolute centre of your attention. She giggles a second time and draws a circle in the centre of your chest with her forefinger, tracing it and smiling as you struggle for words.
"What, do I have lipstick on my teeth or something?" She brings a manicured fingertip across her grin and you shake your head in return.
"Not that I can see," you answer.
"Then what are you staring at? See something you want?" She's teasing you but you manage to stumble through the answer.
"You look..." It doesn't matter what words you try and find. She does that half-lidded, cocking her head thing to the side and you're lost again. Lost to her, hypnotised by her. It's embarrassing.
The giggle grows into a laugh, her shoulders shrugging with amusement as she closes her eyes for a second, shaking her head softly. She places her hand on your collar, smoothing over the edge of your blazer and then adjusting it over your shoulders. "You dressed up well. Not used to seeing you in something so smart." She runs her hands down the front of your blazer, pressing it against your body to straighten it. "You look good," Yujin says with a final, gentle pat at the centre of your chest.
"I need to take a card." You brush over the compliment—you’ve never really been that good at taking them.
"Better hurry up before they're all gone, you don't want to have to do the forfeit. Once you get one, make sure you find me." She pokes her finger into your chest. "It's important, okay?" She bats her eyelashes at you. You promise you'll be there, you're sure of it, and then with a final smile, she leaves and heads towards a different room, slipping into the crowds.
The whole exchange is over far too quickly. The phantom touch of Yujin's fingers lingers on your chest, even as she disappears. You would stand, spellbound forevermore, a statue set upon the tiles, if it wasn't for the fact you look a complete fool standing and staring into nothing.
You turn to the tables and can't spot Minju in the crowd. You spend some time waiting, working your way forward as people collect their cards until you're at the front. A woman holds out a deck of face-down cards and you draw one from it, slip it into your pocket and quickly move on.
"You look lost. Like a lamb." The unmistakable sound of Wonyoung's voice rings out. "I'm surprised you even showed up. Last I heard you were crying into a whiskey." Her laugh has the venom of a snake, with an even worse bite. Her purple dress hugs her slender frame. It clings to the sharp contours of her shoulders. An expensive jewelled necklace rests in the centre of her bare upper chest.
"I wasn't crying..." You deny the accusation.
Wonyoung presses her hands to your shoulders, forcing you into place as she meets your eyes. "Wasn’t sure if you would show your face tonight. Don’t worry, no one knows what happened, and I can keep it that way." There's something about Wonyoung that always feels intimidating, especially now, with how her eyes seem to trap you and the way her voice plays out so assured, full of certainty and purpose. "But it’s a good thing you’re here. I need you."
"What do you mean?" It's been barely a minute and she's already asking things of you. She just brushes over the storm she caused and the damage she could have done to your life.
Wonyoung leans close and moves her lips to your ear. "You know that idiot boyfriend of mine? Well, I need him to catch us."
"You're joking, right?" you ask, and then after a brief moment of silence her message sinks in and you realise she isn't joking. "Haven’t we done enough damage?"
"I’m already solving your school issue, so the least you can do is help me out." She dismisses your problems as always. "Right now I need you to focus and help me make him break up with me." Wonyoung strokes your cheek. "Does that sound doable?"
You bite down into your lip, trying to contain your emotions and to keep your annoyance from bubbling to the surface.
"Great thanks. I will find you when I need you." With a cruel and patronising tap to your head, Wonyoung smiles smugly.
"I didn't even agree."
"You never said no to fucking me before. And it's not like Minju's pussy even comes close to mine."
She flashes a dark grin at you before disappearing through the crowds. Fuck you do have a type of girl, and fuck does Wonyoung and her attitude get under your skin. In some sick and twisted way, it still turns you on. Fuck.
It's probably about time to get away. To leave the party and this fucked up life. Anyone with a little bit of sense would. In the end, you just settle for going to the bathroom.
-
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For five minutes you have been waiting and the line hasn't budged. Too many people waiting to use a single bathroom.
"You're Minju's date right?" You turn to find the pink-haired girl from earlier standing beside you. The one who owns this place. Her thin lips curve to a gentle, elegant smile that cuts across her pale complexion. You realise now, stood beside her, how dainty she is. Her petite frame matches her cute voice. "Are you waiting in line?"
"Yeah, I—" you reply, not fully sure where the question is leading but her widening smile interrupts you.
"Follow me." She starts walking, expecting you to not question her command. You walk behind her, her slim frame adorned elegantly in light fabric. Pink waves flow over her bare, exposed shoulder. Her heels strike the floor with a rhythm of confidence. She glides gracefully with poise and intent. Her every step is punctuated with a swagger you cannot match.
With her hair bobbing softly, she calls out your name. "Up here. Then the third door on the right. My close friends are allowed upstairs. And you, I guess."
"Oh. Thank you."
She says nothing else, just gliding away and leaving you at the base of the stairs.
After a quick climb you find the door she described. It's unassuming, a standard wooden door that looks identical to all the others. You put a hand to the cold metal and push. A coolness greets your fingers as the gap opens and you let yourself inside.
The bathroom is pristine. Immaculate. Spacious. Porcelain and polished. Glass and stainless steel. There's the familiar hum of a ventilation unit set into the ceiling, the fans circling in constant rotation. To the back, a large double shower, framed by the marble walls and lit by the mood-setting hue of soft lights.
Finally, a room in this place that, to your relief, is empty.
When you've finished up you head to the sink and wash. You lean over it to study yourself in the mirror, one last touch up of your hair and a pull to straighten out the creases of your clothes.
Then the door crashes open.
Rei stumbles in with all the poise of a newborn calf. "Hey, sexy uncle. Didn't know you were in here. How is my aunt?" She laughs in a raspy slur. "What were you doing? Oh." Her finger taps against her bottom lip, trying her best to appear conspiratorial.
"Nothing, I—"
Rei continues. "Playing with yourself?" She points to the zipper you forgot to close. "Hope you think about me."
You give your answer and say, "actually, I was just doing normal toilet stuff. Nothing weird."
"Boring." She declares, slamming the door behind her. Rei ignores you as she walks over to the toilet, slipping her hand under her dress and pulling down her underwear. You're immediately heading to the door, giving her the privacy she didn't even bother to ask for. "Where are you going uncle?"
"Back to the party." You're just about to turn the doorknob when her voice hits you in the back.
"Don't go. Don't leave me all alone."
You sigh, slouching your shoulders and loosening your grip on the door. "Only if you agree to stop calling me uncle."
"Okay, okay. Promise,” she says and then she mumbles something, laughing as she does. Eventually, she speaks loud enough to hear. "Stop staring at the door. You can look at me."
You turn to find her sitting there. A small pair of panties by her ankles. A smile on her face. Her smooth thighs jutted out from the bottom of her dress, bare down to her heels.
"Thanks again," Rei says. "You saved me today."
"Happy to help." You walk towards the sink and mirror again, unsure what to do with yourself.
Luckily, Rei refuses silence. "What's going on with you and Minju?" Unluckily, she's chosen the worst topic of conversation.
"We just met. We're friends I guess."
"Just buddies," she says playfully. "Fuck buddies."
"Do you only ever think about sex?" You ask, turning away and towards your reflection. Your question is answered only with the sound of her flushing the toilet.
There's the briefest moment of silence that follows until you can hear her steps on the tiles. She walks to your side, washing her hands and staring at you in the reflection. "I do actually. Especially when I was supposed to cum five hours ago and still haven't had the chance to finish myself off."
This girl is unfiltered. It's commendable that she is so true to her desires. So bold and honest in the face of the fear of judgment.
"Or maybe it's when I'm in the same room as an incredibly hot guy and my panties are still on the floor." There's a lustful rasp to her voice now. You turn to look at her, at the full, sparkling light in her eye, and you let your gaze wander lower. You stray to her shoulder, where her dress hangs loose. The dress clung across her frame, covering her bust but leaving enough for your imagination to formulate the shape of them beneath.
"Rei..." You draw her name out to a few syllables and with it a few extra moments for your thoughts to come together. "What are you thinking?"
"What is your thing?" Her question catches you off guard. "What do you like?" Rei brings her thumb to her lips, pushing it into her mouth and sucking gently. "Do you really like getting your cock sucked? What do you want?"
Her fingers stroke your chin. Soft pads massage and caress with a teasing, tantalising touch. Her face gets closer, inch by inch, and you can smell the sweet scent of her perfume. You can hear her ragged breath as she loses control. And your heart, beating like a drum inside your chest.
"I owe you one. And I'm ready to do anything." She says it with such unashamed candour and it sets your cheeks aflame.
"Do you do this for everyone who is nice to you?" you whisper.
She shakes her head, "only the really fucking hot ones."
You're close. Your breathing is shallow. Every part of you tells you it's a bad idea, but that's what is so enticing. That's why your cock is pulsing. She reaches forward and rubs her palm gently up and down over the bulge.
She gives you a gentle wink. "Tell me what you want. What's your favourite part of me? And don't give me something sappy like my humour. Think with your cock." As she says the words she squeezes her grip on it. Her fingers slowly closing, holding and massaging. Her lips are soft, slightly parted. That adorable face. Sparkling eyes. And the taste of the words that lingers on your lips.
"You have great legs." You indulge her in an answer.
"See, now was that so hard?" She buries her hand into your trousers through the open zipper. "So what will it be? My thighs? Knees? My feet? I usually don't like when people see my feet but if you're that desperate to cum on them. They're all yours."
You drop a hand down by her side and reach to grab her leg by the thigh. "You have great thighs."
You swear the excitement on her face could light up the city. "There we go. Tell me what you want to do." She pushes her hand around in your trousers, fishing out your cock.
You lean into her ear. "I want you to wrap those beautiful thighs around my cock." You can't believe the words you're saying to her. Neither can she. The sound of her shallow breath is ragged as she runs it through her mind. She nods.
"Then I will."
Rei gently strokes you to life, massaging you until the blood begins to rush. Soon enough, you are ready, hard and hungry. Your pulse quickens with every gentle rub of her hand. You slip a hand around the back of her neck. "Not a word to anyone." Your words make her giggle and she responds with a breathless shush.
You turn her to the sink, putting her between you and it and she releases your cock. Rei spits in her hand while you're hiking her dress up over her bare ass and then she reaches behind her to cover your cock in her saliva. With one hand you guide your cock and she gasps with excitement as you rest your length between her legs, pressing and grinding.
Rei looks at you through the mirror and smirks as she pressed her legs together, closing your slick cock between her thighs. "Use me. I want to see you enjoy this."
Your arms wrap her torso. You grab a firm breast through her clothes as your other arm wraps her. Pull her closer to you. Your mouth against her ear, feeling the warmth of her, breathing in the soft scents from her perfumes, you inhale it all.
Your mouth parts and you groan with the growing sensation building inside you. Her legs squeeze tightly around you as you slip back and forth between them. The way they hold you is incredible, snug and slick. Her skin smooth and grasping.
Rei reaches between her legs, putting her delicate touch on the tip of your cock poking between her legs. Her fingers pull at you, directing your cock higher between her thighs. Before long, you feel her folds envelop the tip. As wet as ever. Rei squeezes and grinds, pushing your tip against her clit.
"I want it all," she hisses through her teeth. You grip her flesh, holding her on the edge of what she craves. Slipping between her thick thighs over and over again, refusing to drive into her cunt.
You pull at her nipples through her dress. Tease. Bite her ear. Kiss her shoulder. Run your nose up her neck. Inhale her perfume. And the most torturous thing to ever do to Rei:
Slow down.
Your thrusts between her legs become measured. Deliberate. Long, hard and powerful motions, dragging over her slit. She whimpers, "why are you making me wait?"
In the mirror her features flush, eyes clench closed and lips tremble. A flush of red flows through her skin. Her breath quickens, rasping between every uttered plea. Your dick is throbbing. Your senses electrifying. Every part of you tenses with the burning urge. Every cell and sinew wants to drive into that incredible cunt but the drumroll is exquisite.
"Do it," Rei begs. The anticipation becoming a torrent for her, as much as your own, the joy of desire and the torment of denial.
"When I'm ready," is all the answer she will get from you.
"Please. I have needed a good cock all day." Her words fill the cool room. They bounce from the hard white surfaces. Dancing to the hum of the ventilation.
"This is you saying thank you, isn't it?" you growl into her ear. "My choice. I want your tits first."
Her lips utter the words 'whatever you want, yes' a few times over. Each utterance pleading, begging; each one filled with desire. Desperate to ease the tension inside, she quickly reaches up her back and unzips her dress for you. She peels it open to reveal her bare back and the strap of her bra.
You work at her bra while she slips out of her dress. It's all so rushed. Almost clumsy. Everything is loose now, and she shakes it all off, kicking it all to the side and turning to you, completely naked. "Fuck, you're hot," you say before realising. The words slip from you, unplanned, raw, genuine.
"I know." Rei grins and then she cups her tits, two perfect handfuls. "So you like these, huh?"
You nod.
She squeezes them, flesh spilling between spread fingers. "And if I give you them, then will you fuck me?"
She pouts those soft lips that drive you wild. She arches her back and presents them for you, waiting, hands by her side. Eager. The invitation is unmistakable. You bend her backwards against the sink, arching her lower back over the marble top and then pressing your body against her. "Yes."
You lower your head and smile at her, her stiff nipple right by your lips. You blow a warm, heavy stream of air over it and she giggles softly. You don't just take her offered tits. Not yet. Instead, you kiss between them, wrapping your tongue to lick up her torso, upwards toward her collarbones. You nibble the protrusion gently with your teeth. Her breaths become short sharp puffs as her body tenses with each graze.
You run your tongue back down again, towards a nipple. You take it into your mouth, licking and then biting. Slowly pulling at her nipple with your teeth, stretching and toying, listening for her moaning, soft and suppressed, with a rising note of pleasure.
She pats at the back of your head and squirms at each pinch of your teeth. You switch nipples, wetting it in your mouth and sucking at it, allowing it to release with a popping sound, and then giving it a quick bite.
Your hands begin to travel across Rei's body—traversing and wandering in their exploration of her skin. Grabbing and feeling, always squeezing her softness with lust in one moment and adoration the next.
"Can't wait any longer,” she says in frustrated impatience. Rei strokes the back of your head, raking her nails against your scalp. She leans back, supporting herself on one arm and pushing her chest out towards your face. She closes her eyes and hums.
You think that Rei enjoys a little more biting than is conventional. Enjoying a small amount of pain with her pleasure, you know it when she moans loudly every time your teeth tug at her sensitive flesh. Her hands pull at the base of your skull and grasp at your hair. Her body moves beneath you, desperate to find any sort of friction between her legs. You can see the pleasure and pain in her expressions alternating between one another. Rei moans your name out. A hushed whisper, begging you to fuck her. To put her out of her misery.
"Patience," you tell her. The single word causing so much frustration.
She groans through gritted teeth before buckling under your teasing. Rei mutters, "Just fuck me with your big fucking cock already." Her hands desperately pull you from her chest, but you refuse. She continues her pleas; begging you to stop being so cruel; to take mercy on her; that her aching cunt can't wait another second.
She's reaching for your trousers now, unfastening them and pushing them away from your hips so they fall to your ankles.
"On your knees first." 
Rei's eyes go wide at your demands.
She pouts, but the blush on her cheeks is unmistakably eager. She falls from the sink onto her knees. Rei has that look in her eyes, an appetite, and it shows as clear as day. You're holding her by the hand and pulling her as you find a seat on the side of the bath.
Rei crawls over, a naughty grin plastered across her face. She presses her palms onto your knees and parts your legs for her to take her place between them. As soon as she has a close-up of the prize, she all but licks her lips with excitement, grasping a hold of it tightly. "Oh god, it's so big," Rei's eyes light up in delight as she feels the thickness and weight. "Fuck me. Why did you keep this big, beautiful cock from me until now?"
Her fingers run up and down over it gently—just soft grazes against your skin. Soothing. Tender. When her tongue first touches the underside of your head, it sends shivers through you. Rei drags it up, sliding and caressing, all the while keeping eye contact with her fluttering, batting gaze. Then she runs the very tip across her plump, kissable lips, leaving behind a wet line before diving forward and wrapping her mouth around you.
A soft 'fuck' escapes you at the warmth of her mouth engulfing you. She smiles, pulling away and then admiring your cock with her teeth biting the flesh of her bottom lip. Rei kisses her way down the bottom of your shaft before just staring at it again. "It's so perfect. Your cock is literally a fucking work of art."
"It's going to look even better pressed between those beautiful tits," you reply to her compliment.
She takes the hint and pushes her tits towards it. "My tits love your cock already." Rei presses your cock against her nipple and pushes, teasing. "But not as much as my pussy will."
"Rei." Her eyes are lost in their new interest. You run a hand over the side of her face. The soft skin of her cheek. Pushing her hair behind an ear. Touching her lips gently with your thumb. "Will you put those amazing tits to good use? For me?" You ask as you push your thumb into her mouth, which makes her look up at you and she accepts it.
She nods her agreement.
"Good girl, Rei," you reply. Your voice is calm, smooth, and silky. The reaction you receive is everything you could hope for. Her pupils widen, her ears redden, and her face flushes. The combination of praise, and a dominant tone and touch, seems to really make her glow.
Rei obliges to the command.
Wet with her saliva, Rei's breasts wrap around your aching cock with ease. Her skin is soft and velvety. Flesh mouldable and forgiving. So warm. So smooth. Perfect.
Once your cock is settled between the swell of her breasts, Rei rocks her chest against it. A steady movement up and down; the sensual rubbing of flesh. Rei looks up at you, the hunger written plain to read across her face as she slides her tits against you. Her fingers intertwine across her tits, holding them together. She moans gently against your thumb as your cock continues to protrude from her cleavage over and over. The sounds reverberate inside her warm, wet mouth, stimulating as they tickle against your skin.
The ache inside you, the tense of muscle and flexed sinews—it builds. Pools and twists and heats in the centre of your body. Rei moans again. She talks through it too. The thumb pressing inside her mouth inhibits it only slightly. "I need it in my pussy. I would even take it in my ass right now. I need you."
Truth is, you need to fuck her just as badly now, too. "Stand." Immediately, Rei's shoulders drop as she pulls her breasts away and follows your order. "Bend over the sink."
"Finally." She's grinning when she moves. Placing her feet wide and leaning on the marble of the sink. You follow her every step.
You run a hand down her leg, gripping behind the knee and hooking it into the air, planting her leg onto the surface. She's open and so very willing. You draw your cock against her a final time, watch her contorted face in the mirror, and then slide into her.
Her eyes flash open and her jaw drops agape. A breathless silence. Now a burst of laughter broken by gasps for air. She grins and giggles and moans as you pound into her from behind. Her small hands claw against the sink, scrambling for something to hold to stabilise herself and support against the onslaught.
A hand on her hip to keep her in place, you reach the other to her neck. You grab and pull, rearing her back. Draw her flush with your body. Her soft skin against your chest. Her long hair is on your shoulder. She laughs again as you do it, sweet pleasured giggles that just don't stop.
"Harder, harder." She strains the words through the squeezing of her throat.
"Like it rough?" you spit into her ear and her lips turn in a grin.
"Like it rough." Her voice a coarse mess. Saliva runs from the corner of her mouth, tinted pink by her lipstick.
You slide your grip up from her neck, fingers along her jaw, thumb and finger pressed into her cheeks. "Fuck. You were right. Pussy so good I can see why guys struggle with you." You pull her head backwards and grind deeper into her. Tight and wet. Her cunt hugs so perfectly around your length that you worry she won't let you out.
"Wony was right. Best. Fuck. Ever." Every single thrust draws the words out into a pathetic moan, and then she laughs again and she strains to force more words. "Gonna cum."
You slip your hand back down to her throat and she grabs at your wrist, not to resist your grip or pull you free, only to reassure and to let you know what she wants. You grip and squeeze.
"Cum for me you pretty slut." Your voice is husky as your will consumes you. Her cries fill the bathroom, her ecstatic bliss heard a thousand times over as she feels her ecstasy roll through.
There is no gentle passing through her orgasm. You care not for how it plays. You don't ride the waves and slow your pace to accommodate it. Her cum spills warm around your cock. Slippery juices seep to her thighs and drip onto the floor as you keep up the relentless pace of your hips, each drive forward, piercing. Her body held against the marble, with her waist pressed against the edge. Her hands are frantic. Scrambling once more for support as you tear her apart with fervour.
"Rei?” The door opens. “Everything okay? Oh, fuck." 
Liz stands in the doorway, stunned and staring. She's about to turn away and run out of the room but before she can step away, Rei speaks through her pleasure.
"Liz. Fuck." The words spill from her breathless mouth. Liz turns back to see the girl cumming again. You can see the astonishment in her gaze, unable to look away, drawn to the display of ecstasy. This time you slow and your hand slips away from her throat.
Rei squirms against the marble counter. The second wave crests and passes and this time her mind does clear. Your cock slows to a stop in her. Rei whips her head around to look at Liz.
"What the fuck?" Liz takes a step back, halfway out of the room, the door almost closing.
"Wait! Come here,” Rei calls out and Liz steps forward again. "Close the door. Quick."
Liz moves toward you and closes the door behind her. She presses herself back against it, watching in amazement as you freeze, still buried in her best friend. You were so blinded by fucking Rei that you didn't even consider stopping, but as rationality takes back over and the situation takes shape in your mind, you suddenly feel trapped under Liz's gaze. You dare not to look in her direction.
For all your tension, Rei is a complete contrast. Relaxed. The utter ease with which she just smiles, looks Liz directly in the eye and says the most casual, inappropriate things. "I'm more than okay. How are you?"
"I—" the question catches her off guard and she stammers an awkward, jolted sentence. Her eyes move to the space between you and Rei where you're still connected. She opens her mouth as if to speak but no words come out. She stutters another broken attempt. Liz eventually shakes her head and replies, "good. Not good. I mean okay. Well, good, but not because—"
She's stumbling over her words until Rei stops her. "Think we have a bit longer in us." She looks over her shoulder to you. "Not gonna cum yet, are you?"
"No," you reply. Entirely confused and a little uncomfortable—not sure exactly what is happening right now. You look back at Liz and she's staring right at you. Wide eyes, open mouth. It's not quite fear you're seeing in them, not disgust either. A cocktail of emotions playing on her face that you wish you could unpick.
"Want to join?" Rei asks. The question hangs in the air. Her tone is light and playful as if it's the most normal question in the world. She can't possibly mean that. She has to be joking. A jest for entertainment and Liz's amusement.
"Isn't this Wonyoung's...?" Liz leaves her question incomplete, letting Rei finish the thought.
"I already asked her. He's fair game." She did? When was this? Does that mean Rei planned to fuck you all along? The confusion only worsens the more you think. Your brain hurts trying to make sense of this. The absolute weirdness of it. And despite it, or rather, because of it, you find this whole thing so much... hotter.
Liz pushes herself off the door and says, "we did talk about it that one time..." She takes a step forward and then continues, "how we wanted to share a guy. But him? Here? Now?"
Liz takes another step forward and you take a tentative step back, slipping out from inside Rei and standing exposed. She gives an offended little groan of displeasure and then slips her leg down from the sink and turns to face you. Suddenly you're feeling lonely and exposed with the two girls staring at you.
"Yeah. Why not?" Rei asks Liz so casually. So blasé. Like she was suggesting what to eat for dinner and not asking Liz to join in a threesome. "And it's not like he would mind. Look how hard he is." Liz stares at the state of your cock. Twitching in the air. Lubricated with Rei.
Liz drags her eyes back to your face and asks you, "do you want me?"
As if you could ever say no. To those large round eyes. To her delicate mouth. The slender body beneath the cocktail dress. To those hips that sway as she continues to walk until she's standing next to Rei.
Rei reaches behind Liz, holding her by the ass and pushing her the final step toward you. Liz instinctively reaches, taking gentle hold of your wet cock. She's standing so close that her tits just graze against your chest. You look down slightly at the woman who's looking back up at you.
Rei asks you now, "do you want us?"
You stay paused for a moment, glancing at Rei for half a second before returning to Liz's stare. You nod gently then lean in to kiss her. The moment your mouths touch your hands begin roaming, one groping for a breast and the other to her lower back, holding her in close. Her tongue presses into you with the urgency you need and she holds you tight by the back of your neck.
You forget about Rei for a moment, giving everything to Liz. Stifling moans of your excitement into her mouth. Your hands feel over her, exploring her from hips to chest to waist—everywhere—before sliding her zipper down over her back and stopping just short of her ass.
Liz stops to catch her breath and it's the moment Rei waited for. One girl at your mouth and one at your neck, the kiss a wet mass of three people fighting with tongues and lips. A hand, presumably Liz's, strokes you gently and with a rhythm. Another on your lower back and another helping you push away Liz's dress. Rei's teeth pinch your neck and a familiar laugh rings out.
"So fucking hot," she whispers in your ear before she bites at your lobe.
Liz's dress falls free from her body, piling by her feet. You pull back for a moment. A moment to drink this beauty in. To see her stunning figure. Standing before you in heels, breasts jutted, is the image of perfection. Rei moves behind her, unclasping her bra and it joins her dress on the floor, revealing perky breasts that yearn for your touch.
Your mouth attacks her and her hands are clutching at you, gripping your head, neck, arms, anything she can as you suck a nipple into your mouth. Your hands explore over her skin. Trailing every part, learning her curves, the contours. The way they flow and mould and ripple.
"Don't hog the good parts," Rei hisses in your ear, breaking the trance Liz's tits had you caught under. Your hand and hers fight for the right to touch Liz. All while her eyes roll back from the bliss of being touched so hungrily.
Rei runs a delicate hand between Liz's legs and she tenses for a moment, sucking in a gasp. Her mouth contorts. Another gasp as Rei continues to brush over the fabric nestled between her thighs.
"Tell him what you want, Liz."
She stammers, gasping again before replying, "Want to ride. Ride his cock." She has barely taken her hand off it this whole time she was being undressed and now she rubs it a little faster. Squeezing a little tighter.
Things start to move in a bit of a blur, unsure of whose hands are on whom or whose mouth and body are pressed against yours as all three of you shuffle towards one side of the room. Somewhere through it, Rei took the lead and made sure you found yourself sitting on the lid of the toilet. Liz's underwear have long since been discarded and she's found herself perched on your thigh.
Liz wraps her arms around your neck as she straddles your leg. She's wrapping her body around you. Grinding against you. Making desperate sounds. Reaching with her mouth to find yours and planting her kisses.
Rei sits on you too, having helped off whatever remained of your clothes. She grinds too, using your other thigh. Rubbing her wet pussy on your leg, while the fingers of one hand comb and massage over your hair while her other trails her nails lightly over your skin. Her lips are soft against your shoulder. The smell of sex fills your nose. You breathe it in, finding yourself wanting.
Rei is so very dangerous to your senses. The softness of her touches. The sensual, raspy tones of her whisper in your ear. How your cock pulses with every plea.
"Keep your dick ready. We will put it to such good use." The first of many dirty promises and sweet nothing Rei whispers as the minutes draw past. She grows ever more erratic. And in contrast, Liz is controlled and measured, fucking her cunt against your leg with focused intent.
They writhe and roll their hips with the urgency of their heat. Wet, pink, and needy cunts, gliding over your skin. Desperate for friction.
"Oh Liz!" Rei moans.
"Ah! Fuck! Don't—”
Liz moves. Unsure, jolting, wracked and robbed of rhythm. It's in those moments Rei leans in for a kiss. Both girls writhe with pleasure, hands to breasts and mouths joined. It's at once an incredible sight. Incredibly erotic and exotic. The display of sensuous want. Skin aflame. Dew of their heat collected.
"Please fuck him," Rei breathes her demands through ragged and frantic breaths. Rei stands and guides, drawing Liz towards your cock, impatient and urgent, with a vice-like grip on her arm. "He is so good," she says through laboured breaths and wet pants.
With Rei's guidance, your dick finds its place between the folds. Wet and silky. Plush and sticky. The undersides of her soft, jiggling thighs press against you as she climbs to mount. So wonderfully slow the descent down your shaft.
It's with an agonisingly measured motion she takes your cock, inch by inch. She swallows every fraction. An exquisite glide. Feeling the undulating pattern of her depths as they shift and cling. Her lips drawn in a tight, silent circle. Her eyes clench shut as she lets out a long and strained exhale. Her back arches slightly, almost reaching the limits, taking you to the hilt.
"Oh Rei, fuck," she whispers, before opening her eyes and meeting yours. Lustful gazes meet for a long second and she leans forward. She keeps you there, lodged and tight for a moment longer. Holding onto it, and you. "Need a minute," she tells you through her laboured breathing.
The beat of your hearts collide in the tense moments as you wait. She is poised to make the most of the moment. Liz begins so slowly. Tentative. The slightest of rocks, cautious and experimental, to ensure herself and you of her control. With each subtle and calculated motion, the sweet clench of her tight insides squeeze.
Her forehead rests against yours as she looks down, fully in focus with the rise and fall.
"She's so good. Tell her," Rei purrs her words as she leans into her friend. "How nice does she feel?" Rei's kissing at Liz's neck between her words. Nipping at the skin while you can feel every shallow gasp Liz makes. The way she inhales each time with a deeper and harsher breath when Rei nips just so.
You barely manage to find your words, but you tell her. Whispering sweet compliments on how nice her pussy feels around your cock. You don't stop there, appreciating parts of her body as you touch them. Running your hands over her hips has you telling her how wonderful she feels under your fingertips, gripping her ass and holding tight to tell her how perfect she is. Her moans and groans fill your ears with music of lust and desire.
Rei's hands travel the expanse of Liz's body as she keeps nipping at her neck. She takes her nipples between her thumb and finger. Squeezes and twists. "So beautiful. He is so turned on by you." Her words encourage and drive Liz as she rides with greater pace and intensity. As the tempo rises, Rei grows impatient with her own needs. "Liz..." she whispers, "give me your hand."
Keeping one on your knee, Liz surrenders the other to Rei. Rei draws her friend in between her legs, "touch me while you ride, please, Liz."
"I don't know how." Her hips rise and fall, still working herself onto your dick. The words of a girl unsure.
Rei puts Liz's hand on her cunt and presses her fingers to the mound. "Yes, you do, just do it how you like it."
"Here," you say, moving your hand between Rei's legs, you guide Liz's fingers and show her how to stroke her friend, "press your fingers here. Move them in a circle. Small but quick circles."
"Mm, Liz, oh—" Rei moans through her strained attempt at words.
“And I think Rei likes it when—
“Ah! Yes!”
Liz puts so much focus on her friend that she struggles to keep riding, as much as her body craves it. She struggles for a while, riding your cock and rubbing Rei's clit. Soon her focus falters, and her pace decreases, losing rhythm as she struggles between the two.
"More Liz, more," Rei pleads.
You take hold of Liz's hips, your fingers digging deep into the flesh of her ass. You drive up into her and a whine escapes her lips. You take over and she pushes her fingers deeper inside Rei just as she wanted, pulling her closer and burying herself into her cunt. Rei melts into Liz as your cock pounds into her.
Rei puts an arm over your shoulder and holds onto you, clawing into your neck and holding you firm. "Ah. Liz... yes." You can tell it won't take Rei long like this. You've noticed how easy it seems to be to make her cum, so this should be no challenge even for Liz.
Surprisingly, without warning, Liz is the first to crumble. Without ceremony. Just a sudden gasping stammer that rattles in her chest. Every sound she makes is a whining, babbling, and messy blend of lust and carnal release. The two collapse against each other as you fuck Liz through her orgasm.
Rei lets out a frustrated groan as Liz struggles to keep fingering her through her tremors. "My clit. Please," she cries. "Here, Liz, here." Her voice is desperate and urgent, trying to guide Liz's finger back where she needed her. "No, no, don't stop." Rei's voice breaks again, desperate and waning.
Liz is limp, unresponsive, and falling into your arms. Totally consumed. Struggling to fight as her whole body seizes with euphoria. You wrap your hands around her body, shifting positions and sliding out of her, leaving her trembling on the toilet. Her body still wracking and twitching and jerking, whimpering and sobbing in post-orgasm bliss.
Rei is agitated. "Need your cock. Want it. Bad. So bad." She throws herself against your body, hands running all over until one grips your cock, still wet with Liz. Your cock twitches. "Need this cock. Fuck. This is making me so hot."
Never have you seen such hunger and need. Lust so dire and reckless. Rei has an inexhaustible libido—an insatiable appetite for sex. You are barely out of Liz's snatch and yet already Rei's is gushing for you. And who are you to deny such a good pussy another fucking?
You bend Rei over towards the hazy Liz. Rei's arms reach over her shoulders onto the wall and her legs spread apart over Liz's knees. You lean behind, ready to enter. Liz's hands brace her waist.
Rei looks at you over her shoulder with her devilish, sadistic smile. "Take me, stretch my fucking cunt. My pussy needs you." Her vulgar demands sound so good, with erotic venom in her words, and you're in her again.
"Yeah, yes. Finally..." Rei coos, as if you deprived her, waiting so patiently for Liz to finish. She pushes her ass back, swallowing you deeper. You run your hands over her skin; her perfect curves. "Mm... yes, finally! Like the first time."
You pound her with a vigour—merciless and rapid thrusts of your hips that drive her into Liz. For someone so small and seemingly delicate she is full of stamina and power, eager to meet every thrust. Your hips clap against her ass and her tongue falls out. A visage of mindless and unrepentant ecstasy. A cathartic euphoria. As your body collides, Rei is bent lower over the resting Liz.
She leads with her tongue, into Liz's mouth, the two girls sharing sloppy, messy, passionate kiss accompanied by stifled moans and Rei's signature giggle of pleasure.
Rei rises from the kiss to pant a sharp breath, but she quickly descends once more, licking up her neck and then sucking the lobe of her ear. While she's busy feasting on the side of Liz's neck, you lean further forward, both pushing in and down on Rei, but also to get your own fix of the girl beneath.
She's dazed and happy. Arms loosely over Rei, she looks up at you. Smiling. The sparkle still twinkling in her eyes. Blanketing and enshrouded with lust. "Feels good," she says weakly.
"For such a long time I've wondered if Liz tasted as good as her body looks," Rei teases Liz, giggling to herself as she playfully bites her neck.
Liz's cheeks flush an embarrassed shade. She replies through a gasped laugh, "you're always talking, saying stuff, teasing all the time." Liz fights through the nerves to manage to say, "you shouldn't..."
"But have you thought of us actually doing it?" You can feel the wickedness from her, her words are as playful as they are inciting and before Liz can give a reply, Rei is dragging her hand between Liz's legs.
She reacts with a spasm that shoots through her, her muscles tensing as if the faintest of touches sent an electric shock through her. Even the light, innocent touch of Rei's fingers has her rolling and squirming under you both as if she is having her every nerve picked apart. "No. Maybe. Once... Oh, fuck, Rei."
Liz buries into the crook of Rei's neck, as best she can anyway, as Rei still jolts back and forth from the pounding you're giving her. Rei just laughs. "Good answer."
You're still rutting into her from behind, and she is growing shaky, her own ability to support herself failing, struggling to remain upright, pushing down onto Liz. Rei's cumming again. Squeezing tighter around you, fighting harder for every bit of motion between your bodies.
Rei pulls her hand back from Liz to push you out and catch her breath, and she falls fully over Liz, causing her to slouch further in her seat and straddle her.
You pull out from Rei, still without release, and instinctively drop to one knee, pulling Liz's leg up to your waist and moving to slide into her again, even if Rei is kind of in the way.
So Liz lies back flat against the seat of the toilet, a panting Rei mounted over her, and you between her legs—sliding your length into her cunt.
"Why," Rei starts, interrupted by her short gasp. "Did I have to have such hot friends?" You grab Rei's ass and use it as an anchor as you drive into Liz. "I'm so jealous of you getting to fuck us all."
"Shouldn't be," you say between heavy breathing—the effort starting to wear. "This whole thing is a mess. All you girls.”
"You're killing me here," she giggles. "If I had a big, thick cock, I can't think of a better way to use it than that." Rei keeps giggling. Loving this whole thing. She is a ball of boundless energy and as you pound into Liz, she just can't resist touching. She cups Liz's breast in her hand and rolls her nipple between her thumb and finger. "I would love Liz here to cum around my cock."
"You're insane," Liz moans out. Her voice shaking; ruined by the joy you're pumping into her. Her eyes flutter, drifting in and out of bliss.
"I'm insane? You're the one getting pounded by a stranger while your best friend humps your body and plays with your tits." She's absolutely crass with her words and her actions. Durty. Obscene. She continues her verbal assault on a gasping and stunned Liz. "How long have you dreamed about a good, thick cock, fucking you stupid? How many times have you had to finger yourself while watching those amateur porn videos or reading those filthy stories online?"
Liz can barely speak to argue back.
"You girls could always... use a... strap-on." You tell them as your breath gets caught in your chest, you feel it coming. That tingling. A rolling rumble. You're already struggling, feeling the effects of the marathon. But your comment makes them both giggle.
Rei leans down and presses her mouth into Liz's neck. "We could..." Rei is growling now.
Liz is cumming again. Her insides constrict, and her body seizes. The ripples and clenches of her orgasmic vice are too much. You fall over her and press your forehead into Rei's back. Gasping. Panting for air. You're so close it hurts.
So you pull out, reluctantly, freeing your throbbing cock from her hold and standing. A whimpering gasp leaves her lips as her body still shakes.
Rei climbs down from Liz, kneeling in front of you. "A strap-on isn't the same as the real thing." She takes hold of your cock in her delicate touch. So softly, she whispers her words. So gently, they hang in the air with the melodious sound of her voice, sweet like honey and dripping from her lips. "Will you do a dirty girl a favour and paint her pretty face?"
The sight is beyond stunning—an angel on her knees. She rests the tip of your cock against her pursed lips and slowly jerks you. Her glimmering eyes looking up at you in expectant admiration. Her other hand squeezes her breast. She does this all with the utmost confidence that she is going to get exactly what she wants. You nod to her. Yes.
Liz slides from the seat, joining Rei on the floor, on her knees. Rei's hand continue while she shares a smile and a whisper with Liz, words of encouragement that prompt Liz to move in on you. She works her mouth against your balls, planting kisses and stealing licks. 
Both girls savour the taste of your cock while they play with it. They continue until their saliva soaks your length. Your shaft glistening and dripping in their lubricant as their tongues dance along your cock.
It doesn't take you much longer until the two girls are cheek-to-cheek and gazing up into your eyes with the soft strokes of their hands. "Cum for us. Cum. Paint our faces, cover us. Cum. Do it." They beg you.
And then, release.
Hot cum pumps from the tip, erupting in thick strands. The first on Rei—a long thick rope onto her forehead, down the bridge of her nose and across her cheek. She remains remarkably poised, relishing the feeling. Then onto Liz, you catch her with a lot too, just like you did Rei and she flinches. Some into her open and ready mouth. Some on her lip and rolling down her chin. She tries to take her mouth to your cock, but Rei leans in the way and wrestles control and instead, another two shots—one splatters across Rei's lips and the next into her mouth.
Rei pulls you into her and sucks, then rolls her tongue around you. Jerking the final drops and draining you empty. When your hips cease to jolt, Rei swallows. Her mouth and face—messy. Glistening. Still smiling as she looks up at you with glee in her eyes.
Liz's slouches back, propped against the toilet. Her hand plays between her legs. Thrusting her fingers with a fast, firm pace. Chasing a climax she can only finish herself. A sight that steals your attention. The glorious scene of Liz masturbating is utterly hypnotic, the music of her moans in harmony, the euphoria consuming and overwhelming and a rarity you savour.
Another drop hangs from Rei's chin. You bring your cock and tilt it—dragging the rope of cum along Rei's lip. Into her mouth. A quiet moan as she cleans you—the feeling of a dull vibration. With a final suck, she frees you and you almost stumble over, collapsing. You catch the counter, barely.
Rei turns back to her friend and pushes in—meeting mouths. Her lips kiss the taste into Liz. Taking it off her lips and drawing it into her mouth. Her tongue snakes around Liz's before the two girls join in an intense and passionate kiss. Your cum traded between the pair—back and forth. Wet and lewd. Sloppy sounds that have you mesmerised.
Liz swallows as best she can before her strained voice breaks the trance. “This is the best. It will never be topped.” Her dainty fingers still playing with her clit as she continues to savour the experience.
"Until next weekend maybe," Rei interjects. "The three of us could make a whole night of it. Though that might ruin all other sex for us forever." Rei rises to stand, glancing herself in the mirror and reaching a finger up, drawing circles over her cheek to collect a fresh trail of your cum, pressing it to the roof of her mouth and rolling it over her tongue.
It's Liz who finds a smile first, her own soft little giggle followed by a splutter and a cough. It gets you all the same, laughing, the absurdity of this whole scenario dawning on you.
"Think you could handle us for a whole night?" Rei asks you as she stands beside you, looking into the mirror as she pulls more trails of cum into her mouth. Liz stays kneeling on the floor, and she suddenly looks so shy again. Sinking into herself, as if the flush of the lust has washed her clean.
You give a quick chuckle, "maybe not... But I would enjoy every second of trying."
"Guess it is time we all get out," Rei suggests. She looks over her shoulder and says, "and, hey Liz. You're welcome."
"Hm?"
"Your card. You fingered me. So you passed the challenge."
-
Now fully dressed and looking almost like you did when you first walked in, if just a little scruffier, you leave the girls in the bathroom. You doubt anyone who sees you cares, though. The music too loud, the drink too abundant and the dancing too distracting. So no one notices when you re-join the crowds and pass through the hallways looking for someone—anyone.
You still haven't seen Minju since she disappeared at the card stand, nor Wonyoung or Yujin since they walked off into the crowd. As for Gaeul, the one person who is supposed to stop you from doing stupid things, well you haven't seen her yet at all. Maybe that's why you've fucked three girls already today, Gaeul needs to put you under 24/7 watch.
"Finally found you, bro," a voice calls from your left—right on cue.
You spin, and sure enough, it's Gaeul, standing at the corner of the hallway, arms crossed and leaning against the wall with disappointment drawn over her face. She's wearing some of the highest platformed heels you've ever seen, so she almost looks tall. The dress helps too. It's long and sleek from her shoulders down to her knees. Tight to her skin and shimmering under artificial light. An array of gold sparkles and reflective surfaces, bouncing colour everywhere.
"Gaeul, hey."
"You really shouldn't have brought her, you know that?" You had hoped to have spoke to Gaeul before she saw that Minju is here, but that was never going to happen when you're busy fucking her friends. At least she doesn't know about that—yet.
Her question is rhetorical—you know that—but you shrug and answer anyway, "she insisted."
"Oh, really?" Gaeul snaps and then guides you down the hall. Right now, she doesn't sound like the girl you know. She's agitated and annoyed and you're not actually sure if it's at you or someone else. "Sometimes I wonder what goes through your mind. I don't know if it's stubbornness or stupidity bro, but are you trying to get on their bad side?"
"Is it really that bad?"
"I just don't understand you at the minute. I'm trying to help you but I don't know how when I don't know what you want. Is it Wonyoung? Yujin? This Minju person?"
or Rei? Liz, maybe?
"Gaeul. I don't know."
She stops and turns to you, holding onto your arm. "That's the problem, bro. You know I want the best for you, but if you don't know, then neither do I."
"I can't do this now."
"Fine. Enjoy the party, just do me a favour and don't fuck anyone tonight will you?"
Oops.
-
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badnewswhatsleft · 11 months ago
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2023 september - rock sound #300 (fall out boy cover) scans
transcript below cut!
WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE
With the triumphant ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ capturing a whole new generation of fans, Fall Out Boy are riding high, celebrating their past while looking towards a bright future. Pete Wentz and Patrick Stump reflect on recent successes and the lessons learned from two decades of writing and performing together.
WORDS: James Wilson-Taylor PHOTOS: Elliot Ingham
You have just completed a US summer tour that included stadium shows and some of your most ambitious production to date. What were your aims going into this particular show?
PETE: Playing stadiums is a funny thing. I pushed pretty hard to do a couple this time because I think that the record Patrick came up with musically lends itself to that feeling of being part of something larger than yourself. When we were designing the cover to the album, it was meant to be all tangible, which was a reaction to tokens and skins that you can buy and avatars. The title is made out of clay, and the painting is an actual painting. We wanted to approach the show in that way as well. We’ve been playing in front of a gigantic video wall for the past eight years. Now, we wanted a stage show where you could actually walk inside it.
Did adding the new songs from ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ into the setlist change the way you felt about them?
PATRICK: One of the things that was interesting about the record was that we took a lot of time figuring out what it was going to be, what it was going to sound like. We experimented with so many different things. I was instantly really proud. I felt really good about this record but it wasn’t until we got on stage and you’re playing the songs in between our catalogue that I really felt that. It was really noticeable from the first day on this tour - we felt like a different band. There’s a new energy to it. There was something that I could hear live that I couldn’t hear before.
You also revisited a lot of older tracks and b-sides on this tour, including many from the ‘Folie à Deux’-era. What prompted those choices?
PETE: There were some lean years where there weren’t a lot of rock bands being played on pop radio or playing award shows so we tried to play the biggest songs, the biggest versions of them. We tried to make our thing really airtight, bulletproof so that when we played next to whoever the top artist was, people were like, ‘oh yeah, they should be here.’ The culture shift in the world is so interesting because now, maybe rather than going wider, it makes more sense to go deeper with people. We thought about that in the way that we listen to music and the way we watch films. Playing a song that is a b-side or barely made a record but is someone’s favourite song makes a lot of sense in this era. PATRICK: I think there also was a period there where, to Pete’s point, it was a weird time to be a rock band. We had this very strange thing that happened to us, and not a lot of our friends for some reason, where we had a bunch of hits, right? And it didn’t make any sense to me. It still doesn’t make sense to me. But there was a kind of novelty, where we could play a whole set of songs that a lot of people know. It was fun and rewarding for us to do that. But then you run the risk of playing the same set forever. I want to love the songs that we play. I want to care about it and put passion into what we do. And there’s no sustainable way to just do the same thing every night and not get jaded. We weren’t getting there but I really wanted to make sure that we don’t ever get there. PETE: In the origin of Fall Out Boy, what happened at our concerts was we knew how to play five songs really fast and jumped off walls and the fire marshal would shut it down. It was what made the show memorable, but we wanted to be able to last and so we tried to perfect our show and the songs and the stage show and make it flawless. Then you don’t really know how much spontaneity you want to include, because something could go wrong. When we started this tour, and we did a couple of spontaneous things, it opened us up to more. Because things did go wrong and that’s what made the show special. We’re doing what is the most punk rock version of what we could be doing right now.
You seem generally a lot more comfortable celebrating your past success at this point in your career.
PETE: I think it’s actually not a change from our past. I love those records, but I never want to treat them in a cynical way. I never want there to be a wink and a smile where we’re just doing this because it’s the anniversary. This was us celebrating these random songs and we hope people celebrate them with us. There was a purity to it that felt in line with how we’ve always felt about it. I love ‘Folie à Deux’ - out of any Fall Out Boy record that’s probably the one I would listen to. But I just never want it to be done in a cynical way, where we feel like we have to. But celebrating it in a way where there’s the purity of how we felt when we wrote the song originally, I think that’s fucking awesome. PATRICK: Music is a weird art form. Because when you’re an actor and you play a character, that is a specific thing. James Bond always wears a suit and has a gun and is a secret agent. If you change one thing, that’s fine, but you can’t really change all of it. But bands are just people. You are yourself. People get attached to it like it’s a story but it’s not. That was always something that I found difficult. For the story, it’s always good to say, ‘it’s the 20th anniversary, let’s go do the 20th anniversary tour’, that’s a good story thing. But it’s not always honest. We never stopped playing a lot of the songs from ‘Take This To Your Grave’, right? So why would I need to do a 20-year anniversary and perform all the songs back to back? The only reason would be because it would probably sell a lot of tickets and I don’t really ever want to be motivated by that, frankly. One of the things that’s been amazing is that now as the band has been around for a while, we have different layers of audience. I love ‘Folie à Deux’, I do. I love that record. But I had a really personally negative experience of touring on it. So that’s what I think of when I think of that record initially. It had to be brought back to me for me to appreciate it, for me to go, ‘oh, this record is really great. I should be happy with this. I should want to play this.’ So that’s why we got into a lot of the b-sides because we realised that our perspectives on a lot of these songs were based in our feelings and experiences from when we were making them. But you can find new experiences if you play those songs. You can make new memories with them.
You alluded there to the 20th anniversary of ‘Take This To Your Grave’. Obviously you have changed and developed as a band hugely since then. But is there anything you can point to about making that debut record that has remained a part of your process since then?
PETE: We have a language, the band, and it’s definitely a language of cinema and film. That’s maintained through time. We had very disparate music tastes and influences but I think film was a place we really aligned. You could have a deep discussion because none of us were filmmakers. You could say which part was good and which part sucked and not hurt anybody’s feelings, because you weren’t going out to make a film the next day. Whereas with music, I think if we’d only had that to talk about, we would have turned out a different band. PATRICK: ‘Take This To Your Grave’, even though it’s absolutely our first record, there’s an element of it that’s still a work in progress. It is still a band figuring itself out. Andy wasn’t even officially in the band for half of the recording, right? I wasn’t even officially the guitar player for half of the recording. We were still bumbling through it. There was something that popped up a couple times throughout that record where you got these little inklings of who the band really was. We really explored that on ‘From Under The Cork Tree’. So when we talk about what has remained the same… I didn’t want to be a singer, I didn’t know anything about singing, I wasn’t planning on that. I didn’t even plan to really be in this band for that long because Pete had a real band that really toured so I thought this was gonna be a side project. So there’s always been this element within the band where I don’t put too many expectations on things and then Pete has this really big ambition, creatively. There’s this great interplay between the two of us where I’m kind of oblivious, and I don’t know when I’m putting out a big idea and Pete has this amazing vision to find what goes where. There’s something really magical about that because I never could have done a band like this without it. We needed everybody, we needed all four of us. And I think that’s the thing that hasn’t changed - the four of us just being ourselves and trying to figure things out. Listening back to ‘Folie’ or ‘Infinity On High’ or ‘American Beauty’, I’m always amazed at how much better they are than I remember. I listened to ‘MANIA’ the other day, and I have a lot of misgivings about that record, a lot of things I’m frustrated about. But then I’m listening to it and I’m like ‘this is pretty good.’ There’s a lot of good things in there. I don’t know why, it’s kind of like you can’t see those things. It’s kind of amazing to have Pete be able to see those things. And likewise, sometimes Pete has no idea when he writes something brilliant, as a lyricist, and I have to go, ‘No, I’m gonna keep that one, I’m gonna use that.’
On ‘So Much (For) Stardust’, you teamed up with producer Neal Avron again for the first time since 2008. Given how much time has passed, did it take a minute to reestablish that connection or did you pick up where you left off?
PATRICK: It really didn’t feel like any time had passed between us and Neal. It was pretty seamless in terms of working with him. But then there was also the weird aspect where the last time we worked with him was kind of contentious. Interpersonally, the four of us were kind of fighting with each other… as much as we do anyway. We say that and then that myth gets built bigger than it was. We were always pretty cool with each other. It’s just that the least cool was making ‘Folie’. So then getting into it again for this record, it was like no time has passed as people but the four of us got on better so we had more to bring to Neal. PETE: It’s a little bit like when you return to your parents’ house for a holiday break when you’re in college. It’s the same house but now I can drink with my parents. We’d grown up and the first times we worked with Neal, he had to do so much more boy scout leadership, ‘you guys are all gonna be okay, we’re gonna do this activity to earn this badge so you guys don’t fucking murder each other.’ This time, we probably got a different version of Neal that was even more creative, because he had to do less psychotherapy. He went deep too. Sometimes when you’re in a session with somebody, and they’re like, ‘what are we singing about?’, I’ll just be like, ‘stuff’. He was not cool with ‘stuff’. I would get up and go into the bathroom outside the studio and look in the mirror, and think ‘what is it about? How deep are we gonna go?’ That’s a little but scarier to ask yourself. If last time Neal was like a boy scout leader, this time, it was more like a Sherpa. He was helping us get to the summit.
The title track of the album also finds you in a very reflective mood, even bringing back lyrics from ‘Love From The Other Side’. How would you describe the meaning behind that title and the song itself?
PETE: The record title has a couple of different meanings, I guess. The biggest one to me is that we basically all are former stars. That’s what we’re made of, those pieces of carbon. It still feels like the world’s gonna blow and it’s all moving too fast and the wrong things are moving too slow. That track in particular looks back at where you sometimes wish things had gone differently. But this is more from the perspective of when you’re watching a space movie, and they’re too far away and they can’t quite make it back. It doesn’t matter what they do and at some point, the astronaut accepts that. But they’re close enough that you can see the look on their face. I feel like there’s moments like that in the title track. I wish some things were different. But, as an adult going through this, you are too far away from the tether, and you’re just floating into space. It is sad and lonely but in some ways, it’s kind of freeing, because there’s other aspects of our world and my life that I love and that I want to keep shaping and changing. PATRICK: I’ll open up Pete’s lyrics and I just start hearing things. It almost feels effortless in a lot of ways. I just read his lyrics and something starts happening in my head. The first line, ‘I’m in a winter mood, dreaming of spring now’, instantly the piano started to form to me. That was a song that I came close to not sending to the band. When I make demos, I’ll usually wait until I have five or six to send to everybody. I didn’t know if anyone was gonna like this. It’s too moody or it’s not very us. But it was pretty unanimous. Everyone liked that one. I knew this had to end the record. It took on a different life in the context of the whole album. Then on the bridge section, I knew it was going to be the lyrics from ‘Love From The Other Side’. It’s got to come back here. It’s the bookends, but I also love lyrically what it does, you know, ‘in another life, you were my babe’, going back to that kind of regret, which feels different in ‘Love From The Other Side’ than it does here. When the whole song came together, it was the statement of the record.
Aside from the album, you have released a few more recent tracks that have opened you up to a whole new audience, most notably the collaboration with Taylor Swift on ‘Electric Touch’.
PETE: Taylor is the only artist that I’ve met or interacted with in recent times who creates exactly the art of who she is, but does it on such a mass level. So that’s breathtaking to watch from the sidelines. The way fans traded friendship bracelets, I don’t know what the beginning of it was, but you felt that everywhere. We felt that, I saw that in the crowd on our tour. I don’t know Taylor well, but I think she’s doing exactly what she wants and creating exactly the art that she wants to create. And doing that, on such a level, is really awe-inspiring to watch. It makes you want to make the biggest, weirdest version of our thing and put that out there.
Then there was the cover of Billy Joel’s ‘We Didn’t Start The Fire’, which has had some big chart success for you. That must have taken you slightly by surprise.
PATRICK: It’s pretty unexpected. Pete and I were going back and forth about songs we should cover and that was an idea that I had. This is so silly but there was a song a bunch of years ago I had written called ‘Dark Horse’ and then there was a Katy Perry song called ‘Dark Horse’ and I was like, ‘damn it’, you know, I missed the boat on that one. So I thought if we don’t do this cover, somebody else is gonna do it. Let’s just get in the studio and just do it. We spent way more time on those lyrics than you would think because we really wanted to get a specific feel. It was really fun and kind of loose, we just came together in Neal’s house and recorded it in a day. PETE: There’s irreverence to it. I thought the coolest thing was when Billy Joel got asked about it, and he was like, ‘I’m not updating it, that’s fine, go for it.’ I hope if somebody ever chose to update one of ours, we’d be like that. Let them do their thing, they’ll have that version. I thought that was so fucking cool.
It’s also no secret that the sound you became most known for in the mid-2000s is having something of a commercial revival right now. But what is interesting is seeing how bands are building on that sound and changing it.
PATRICK: I love when anybody does anything that feels honest to them. Touring with Bring Me The Horizon, it was really cool seeing what’s natural to them. It makes sense. We changed our sound over time but we were always going to do that. It wasn’t a premeditated thing but for the four of us, it would have been impossible to maintain making the same kind of music forever. Whereas you’ll play with some other bands and they live that one sound. You meet up with them for dinner or something and they’re wearing the shirt of the band that sounds just like their band. You go to their house and they’re playing other bands that sound like them because they live in that thing. Whereas with the four of us and bands like Bring Me The Horizon, we change our sounds over time. And there’s nothing wrong with either. The only thing that’s wrong is if it’s unnatural to you. If you’re AC/DC and all of a sudden power ballads are in and you’re like, ‘Okay, we’ve got to do a power ballad’, that’s when it sucks. But if you’re a thrash metal guy who likes Celine Dion then yeah, do a power ballad. Emo as a word doesn’t mean anything anymore. But if people want to call it that, if the emo thing is back or having another life again, if that’s what’s natural to an artist, I think the world needs more earnest art. If that’s who you are, then do it. PETE: It would be super egotistical to think that the wave that started with us and My Chemical Romance and Panic! At The Disco has just been circling and cycling back. I  remember seeing Nikki Sixx at the airport and he was like, ‘Oh, you’re doing a flaming bass? Mine came from a backpack.’ It keeps coming back but it looks different. Talking to Lil Uzi Vert and Juice WRLD when he was around, it’s so interesting, because it’s so much bigger than just emo or whatever. It’s this whole big pop music thing that’s spinning and churning, and then it moves on, and then it comes back with different aspects and some of the other stuff combined. When you’re a fan of music and art and film, you take different stuff, you add different ingredients, because that’s your taste. Seeing the bands that are up and coming to me, it’s so exciting, because the rules are just different, right? It’s really cool to see artists that lean into the weirdness and lean into a left turn when everyone’s telling you to make a right. That’s so refreshing. PATRICK: It’s really important as an artist gets older to not put too much stock in your own influence. The moment right now that we’re in is bigger than emo and bigger than whatever was happening in 2005. There’s a great line in ‘Downton Abbey’ where someone was asking the Lord about owning this manor and he’s like, ‘well, you don’t really own it, there have been hundreds of owners and you are the custodian of it for a brief time.’ That’s what pop music is like. You just have the ball for a minute and you’re gonna pass it on to somebody else.
We will soon see you in the UK for your arena tour. How do you reflect on your relationship with the fans over here?
PETE: I remember the first time we went to the UK, I wasn’t prepared for how culturally different it was. When we played Reading & Leeds and the summer festivals, it was so different, and so much deeper within the culture. It was a little bit of a shock. The first couple of times we played, I was like, ‘Oh, my God, are we gonna die?’ because the crowd was so crazy, and there was bottles. Then when we came back, we thought maybe this is a beast to be tamed. Finally, you realise it’s a trading of energy. That made the last couple of festivals we played so fucking awesome. When you really realise that the fans over there are real fans of music. It’s really awesome and pretty beautiful. PATRICK: We’ve played the UK now more than a lot of regions of the states. Pretty early on, I just clicked with it. There were differences, cultural things and things that you didn’t expect. But it never felt that different or foreign to me, just a different flavour… PETE: This is why me and Patrick work so well together (laughs).  PATRICK: Well, listen; I’m a rainy weather guy. There is just things that I get there. I don’t really drink anymore all that much. But I totally will have a beer in the UK, there’s something different about every aspect of it, about the ordering of it, about the flavour of it, everything, it’s like a different vibe. The UK audience seemed to click with us too. There have been plenty of times where we felt almost more like a UK band than an American one. There have been years where you go there and almost get a more familial reaction than you would at home. Rock Sound has always been a part of that for us. It was one of the first magazines to care about us and the first magazine to do real interviews. That’s the thing, you would do all these interviews and a lot of them would be like ‘so where did the band’s name come from?’ But Rock Sound took us seriously as artists, maybe before some of us did. That actually made us think about who we are and that was a really cool experience. I think in a lot of ways, we wouldn’t be the band we are without the UK, because I think it taught us a lot about what it is to be yourself.
Fall Out Boy’s ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ is out now via Fueled By Ramen.
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penny00dreadful · 7 months ago
Text
Folie à Deux - Part 3
For @psychocatnerd
Rating: Explicit
Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 AO3
Despite Eddie’s probably entirely accurate depiction of Steve and his complete confidence in his ability to ‘yes-and’ himself into oblivion, the longer he spent in the car, the closer and closer he got to his destination, the nerves got worse and worse.
It didn’t help that the only thing Steve had in his rich boy car, holy shit this thing ran smooth, was ‘Steve’ music. He had nothing loud and screaming to drown out his slowly mounting panic or channel the tapping of his fingers on the wheel.
Like, he had Queen, but there were only so many times he could play Stone Cold Crazy over and over before he needed something else. 
Robin had been adamant about gaining her own independence and while that hadn’t yet manifested in her own drivers licence, it had manifested in her taking the bus to and from Indanapolis, which meant that Eddie was left driving to the next town over, the bigger one, to go pick her up and take her back to Hawkins.
As the bus station came into view, Eddie tried his best to keep his cool. 
He checked himself in the rearview mirror and while, yup, that was still Steve staring back at him, maybe a little more dishevelled than he would usually look, he was pretty sure he could pull this off, actually.
All of that swiftly flew out of the fucking window when Robin got her hand on the passenger door and he had rapid fire thoughts running through his mind of oh fuck, what do I call her? Robbie? Bobbie? Bobbin? Bob? Buckles? Steve had some convoluted system of nicknames, what the fuck would he call her right now?
Robin opened the door, throwing her bag in the back and Eddie was out of fucking time.
“R- Bu- Bobbin!” Eddie exclaimed, a wide smile across his face. Fuck, this was all already going downhill. “How was the bus?”
Robin paused in her shifting, getting herself comfortable in the passenger seat, hands stuck on the seatbelt she had been pulling out and she turned her head slowly, looking at him with a critical eye.
Shit, okay. 
So maybe he hadn’t been as ‘expert’ as he had claimed to be, but fuck it. Nowhere to go but up, right?
“The bus was the bus, Steve.” Robin replied, still examining him like a bug under a microscope, her eyes digging in. 
He put the car back into drive and began to manoeuvre out onto the road, keeping his own eyes front and centre, knowing if he glanced over he wouldn’t be able to keep the strained smile he had on plastered over his face.
They fell into a bitterly uncomfortable silence. Robin was staring at him and Eddie was starting to sweat. Fuck sake, he was known as the guy who could talk until the cows came home and now, now was the time he ended up blanking out on anything to say?
The tension in the car was so thick Eddie felt like he was fucking choking on it, the quiet weighing down on him like some kind of accusatory blanket.
He didn’t think he’d ever seen Robin and Steve be silent around each other. Fuck, what did they usually talk about? Girls? Boobies? Steve’s time at work? What happened in their lives since the last time they talked?
Fuck.
“How was college?” He tried, desperate for something to latch onto.
Robin continued to stare at him. Eddie wasn’t even sure she’d blinked yet. He could see her jaw move, like she was rolling around any potential answer in her mouth. He could feel her eyes raking over his face, his shoulders, where his hands were on the wheel. Ten and two, right? That’s how Steve drove, all uppity and proper?
Except shit, no, that wasn’t it. He was usually leaned back, an elbow on the door or something else effortlessly cool and relaxed.
The road stretched out in front of them and Eddie felt like it was going to be the longest god damned drive of his life.
“The week is long.” Robin said, out of fucking nowhere, nearly making him jump.
“The- wh-” Eddie stuttered. What the fuck kind of tense was that? “Like you had a long week at school?”
Robin took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly. 
“Sure.” She nodded slowly. “Let’s go with that.”
Robin twisted in her seat, reaching for her bag in the back, keeping half her body in the front of the car. It was a move that Eddie was pretty sure Steve wouldn’t allow but by the time he had remembered that, she was already rummaging around.
Eddie heard a muttered “shit” coming from her.
“What? What is it?”
Robin pulled herself mostly back into the front, one hand still digging around in her bag. “Can you pull over really quick? I think I might have left something behind.”
Eddie took a quick glance out the window to the empty roads around them. Nothing but asphalt and trees as far as the eye could see. He wasn’t even sure of the last time they passed another car. Typical Hawkins shit. He pulled off into the grass by the edge of the forest and threw the car into park.
“What did you forg-” Eddie’s words got caught in his throat as the cold metal of a sharp blade was pressed mercilessly against his throat, not cutting but dangerously close to doing so.
Fucking hell he hadn’t even seen Robin move. 
She was leaning over the centre console, her body pressing in threateningly close, her eyes ablaze and her teeth bared. 
“What are you?” She hissed out.
Eddie had faced up against knives before, they weren’t anything new to him but there was something about being threatened by someone who he knew for a fact had faced down death and Russian soldiers and fuckign alternate dimension creatures and fought for her life that gave Robin an extra terrifying edge. 
Eddie threw his hands up in surrender. He probably could have moved a little slower, probably could have actively tried not to shock her but sue him, he was starting to panic.
“I’m-” He swallowed against his own will, feeling the blade cut in ever so slightly. “I’m Steve-?”
“No you’re not.” She snapped back. “You might look like him, but you don’t move like him, you don’t talk like him. You’re something else entirely. What are you? Are you Vecna? Where is Steve?! What have you done with him?!”
She was shouting at him now and Eddie was probably about five more loud words away from curling up into a ball so fuck it. Steve could be mad at him later for spilling the beans. 
“I’m Eddie! Steve’s fine, he’s back home!” He squeaked out, entirely undignified but that wasn’t exactly his top priority right now. 
“Bullshit.” She spat, pressing in just a tiny bit more. “You think I’m gonna believe some fucking… pod person-”
“No, no!” He had nowhere to back up, nowhere to go. Robin already had him up against the driver's side door and he could tell from the look in her eye that if he didn’t convince her soon, she wouldn’t hesitate. “It’s me, I swear! It’s- I’m Eddie!”
She didn’t waver for a second aside from a disbelieving quirk of her eyebrow. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” 
“Rob, please, I swear-”
“Prove it.”
“I… fuck.” 
Okay, Eddie and Robin, Eddie and Robin. They had things they shared together, right? They had that argument about music that one time? And like… there was the whole ‘Steve’ of everything between them because while Robin was a rambler and scatterbrained and weird she was a fucking genius in certain ways and far more perceptive than people gave her credit for.
“You and Steve have your entire first dance planned out for your totally real not for tax benefits marriage to Total Eclipse of the Heart. It took you a month to figure out one of the lifts and I nearly died when Steve dragged me into it one day when you weren’t there.” Eddie word-vomited out in a single breath. “I’m actually a big fan of romance movies and novels and we’ve talked about it extensively and you swore to never tell anyone but I have a suspicion you’ve told Steve because you tell him everything.” he hesitated, wilting a little under her still critical eye.
“You’re gonna have to give me more than that.” 
Eddie bit his lip, deciding to finally man up and go for broke.
“I’m hopelessly in love with your soulmate. And I want him to bend me over any available surface and buttsex me until I can’t walk properly anymore.”
Robin pursed her lips but it looked more like she was trying to hide a smile rather than preparing to gut him like a fish.
With a flick of her wrist, she retracted the pocket knife, relaxing back into her seat and sending him a crooked grin. “I would have expected you to do better with his hair. You certainly stare at him enough for it.”
Eddie’s mouth hung open, staring, trying to get over the fucking whiplash of her accepting the answer so quickly. 
Robin looked back over at him with a raised eyebrow. “Well? Drive.”
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“Your lesbian tried to kill me, Stevie.” Eddie called out into the Harrington home, letting both himself and Robin inside.
Robin shot off ahead of him before coming to an abrupt stop in the middle of the room, turning her head slightly like she was trying to listen for something.
There was only silence that answered him back and that wasn’t exactly the best way to convince Robin that he wasn’t some kind of body snatcher. 
Eddie felt his fingers twitch. He didn’t have any of his rings and he had nothing to fiddle with, nothing to nervously twist as he tried not to panic about the fact that Steve had run off somewhere with Eddie’s body.
Something had caught Robin’s attention though, and she took off again into the kitchen.  
Something clanked in one of Steve’s many unused garages. 
Rich people, what the fuck, man.
A mess of shaggy dark brown curls poked around the door and Eddie let out a silent sigh of relief that both his body and Steve were apparently fine, just fucking around in his garage for some reason.
Steve glanced between the two of them with wide, wide eyes, fuck were his eyes always that big? Did he look like that all the time?
Robin sighed out “dingus” as soon as she caught sight of him and the two of them fell into each other like they had been drawn together by some magnetic force, like she just knew it was Steve, how did she just know?
Steve had changed his clothes, switching the crop top and tight ripped jeans out for some kind of tank top and Jesus H. Christ. 
Steve had put Eddie’s body in those fucking gym shorts and while they did not look as good on him as they did on Steve, they… still weren’t half bad, actually. 
Damn, Eddie really needed to highlight his legs more.
If he ever got his body back.
“Birdie.” Steve muttered into Robin’s neck while he plucked her from the ground and swung her around himself.
Birdie, god damn it! The one name I didn’t fucking think of, of course.
Eddie huffed in almost mock irritation but if he was being honest with himself, there was some actual irritation there too. 
“Why doesn’t he get a knife to the throat?” Eddie scowled, turning his nose skyward.
Steve blinked. “Excuse me?”
Robin waved him off. “Because this is clearly Steve and he’s not acting extremely suspicious!”
Steve looked down at her. “You held a knife to his throat?”
“He was acting suspicious.” She said, completely unphased. 
“Did you call him a pod person?”
“He was acting like a pod person!”
“I was not-”
“Did you cut him?” Steve was leaning around Robin, still in his embrace, raking his eyes over Eddie’s neck.
“No, I’m not that careless, Steven.”
“Well it’s hard to know sometimes, Robert. You can barely carry a cup of coffee six steps without spilling it.”
“That’s not my fault! The human body’s oscillation rate-”
“Okay.” Eddie clapped his hands together in a move that was so reminiscent of Steve it almost scared him. “While this has been a lovely reunion, I am feeling very third wheeled, here and I don’t like it so I’m gonna start complaining about it.”
With a tilt of his head, Eddie was able to spot some kind of metal monstrosity in the garage over Steve’s shoulder. Something with bars and weights and cushioned bits. It looked like it could have either been a torture machine or an exercise machine. 
Or with some creative thinking, some kind of sex thing.
It probably wasn't a sex thing. 
Unfortunately.  
“Stevie, what were you doing while I was gone?” Eddie asked, wondering if he’d be able to like… do things with one of those machines now that he was in Steve’s body.
Steve shrugged, his cheeks turning a little pink. “Did you know you can squat, like, 160?”
Eddie stared at him, bewildered. “Uh… no? I did not know that. Why do you know that? How do you know that? What does that even mean? What-”
Eddie looked back to the home gym again.
No…
He didn’t…
He wouldn’t!
This was tantamount to betrayal!
“What have you been doing to my body, Harrington?”
Steve fixed him with what could only be described as a Steve Harrington smile, all sweet boy-next-door charm and standup citizenry, which was so fucking weird coming from his own face, scars and all.
“Testing it out.” Steve said to him, like he was an innocent angel. “Didn’t you say you wouldn’t be mad if I explored a little?”
“That’s not what I meant, I didn’t mean jock shit.”
“What did you mean then?”
Sexy things! Do sexy things to my body while you’re in there!
“This is so fucking weird.” Robin was staring in between the two of them with both a sense of wonder and some kind of terrifying clinical curiosity. “You.” She pointed at Steve. “Follow me. Tell me everything. You.” She pointed at Eddie. “Stay here. You tell me everything once we’re done.”
“Separately? What is this? An interrogation?”
“Yeah.” Robin answered with an air of ‘duh’ around her. “I’m collecting the facts independently, dipshit.”
“Why am I dipshit and Steve gets to be dingus?”
“Because I said so.”
“This is blatant favouritism.”
Robin snorted. “Nice of you to catch up.” She patted him on the head again, leaving him pouting and steered Steve back into the garage, shutting the door behind her. 
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Eddie had only managed to resist his impulses for all of four minutes, sitting on the couch and twiddling his thumbs before he finally broke. 
Steve and Robin could be in the garage for hours knowing the two of them, so he had time. He had time to be a little shit and that box in the back of Steve’s closet had been a box living in the back of his head since he had first laid eyes on it.
So, yeah.
Four minutes is all it took him to give into his impulses and tear up the stairs.
It was right where Eddie had left it, sitting innocently in the back corner. In all honesty Eddie had expected to come back and find it hidden but apparently Steve had been so preoccupied trying to figure out if he could bully Eddie’s body into doing some jock nonsense that the thought of the secret box at the back of his closet hadn’t even crossed his mind.
God, he hoped Steve wouldn’t take his body out jogging next. 
Maybe he could handle swimming, but jogging seemed like such a… task.
Eddie knelt down, his heart in his throat and repeated the motion he had that morning, slipping his finger under the lip of the cardboard box and lifted.
Oh.
He’d thought…
They told him it was gone…
But there it was.
Lovingly folded and gently placed in a small secret space at the back of Steve’s closet.
Denim and patches and pins and blood and grime.
His vest.
Steve had kept his vest.
Even after everything. All the bad memories attached to it, all of the hurt and pain that must have come from it. Steve had kept it. And told Eddie it was lost.
Why would he tell Eddie it was lost?
Why would he keep it?
Hidden away in the back of his closet like some kind of… secret shame?
Was Steve ashamed of keeping it?
Away from him?
Or was he ashamed of why he kept it?
What could have possessed him to keep something of Eddie’s so close yet so far away. In his bedroom but hidden like a secret.
Eddie looked closer, trying to figure it out, trying to put himself in Steve’s mind, which wasn’t as easy as he thought it might be, being in his body. But he wanted to know. 
Why did Steve lie about it, keep it and then hide it?
Eddie reached out, but stopped himself. It didn’t feel… right for some reason. The vest didn’t really feel like his anymore, it was… it was Steve’s. Steve bled on this thing, he fought and protected and suffered on that vest. Far more than Eddie ever had.
And anyway, he was making a new one so… It wasn’t his anymore. It wasn’t his right to take it. 
He put the lid back on and took a step back, staring at it, going through everything in his head.
What did it mean?
He knew what he hoped it meant, what he suspected it meant but he couldn’t be sure and he wanted so badly to be sure. 
Should he ask about it?
He didn’t even have to ask Steve, he could ask Robin.
But if he asked Robin it would almost definitely get back to Steve that he’d snooped and that he’d found something that Steve clearly felt like hiding. 
Eddie placed his hands on his hips and sighed. 
He didn’t really know what to do to move forward. 
Well… he knew what he wanted to do. 
He wanted to kiss Steve about it, that was what he wanted to do. 
But the thing was, he wanted to kiss Steve. All of Steve. 
He didn’t want to kiss Steve while Steve was him, in his body.
Not that… well. Not that Eddie would turn down the opportunity to kiss himself if it was handed to him. 
He was man enough to admit he was curious. Who wouldn't be?
But he wanted all of Steve.
It would feel almost incomplete were it to happen now.
Glancing over, he caught sight of himself in the mirror and all at once was reminded that they kind of had other things to be worrying about right now.
Like this whole fucking Jodie Foster Freaky Friday nonsense.
Yeah…
Yeah, it could wait.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 AO3
As always, my biggest thanks and much love to @hbyrde36 for the beta work with this and to the @strangerthingswritersguild for their motivation!
Divider by @firefly-graphics
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werezmastarbucks · 1 year ago
Text
kevin khatchadourian x female reader timeline of relationship pt 2
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first part
warnings: mutual abuse, mentions of school shooting, folie a deux, mentions of stalking, mentions of suicidal thoughts, self-harm, living with trauma, otherwise it's fun! also, Kevin gets way more jail time while I'm captaining this ship
• Kevin got a reduced sentence, because at the time of the shooting he was just three days shy of sixteen
• that shows that he was calculating from the beginning to the end. Moreover, he calculated exactly how much time it would take him to fuck you, and he managed to do it even with some spare time left
• the headlines screamed of despair. You heard that Kevin had killed his father and his little sister - that angelic, innocent, happy girl, before going to school
• there were many times when you asked yourself why he spared you
• but there were now other things to think about. Like, how you were supposed to go on living now. Your own little grudge about that night at the party dissipated and became a minor failure even before the calendar year was out.
• you heard his mum sold the house and moved away on the outskirts of the city. She didn't leave the town though, because at first, Kevin was held at the local facility for minors.
• even you got your share of hatred, to say nothing about his mother.
• the police investigated you mildly, because you were the only survivor in the massacre. They quickly understood you hadn't conspired with Kevin. But people didn't care.
• very soon, you moved away and left the town, and school, behind you.
• five years of therapy, contemplation, heartache, spent with total lack of comprehension of what had transpired. Weeks turned into months as you went into a frenzy, sitting in your room, staring at the walls, trying to find your place in this story.
• you were recalling all of the moments you spent with him, one by one, trying to find the second he snapped. You remembered how you marveled at the beautiful stack of arrows on his wall. Just like Robin Hood's.
• five years of therapy, and self-reflexion. And then, when you were twenty years old, you decided to google his name for the first time in all that time.
• "I don't know why I did it: Kevin Khatchadourian, school shooter with a bow, has been transferred to the adult prison". An article from three years ago. There was a lot of news about him, a lot of pictures of Kevin. Him in his orange costume, hair cut short, and he looked like a disgraced puppy, lost. He was almost nothing without his magical poetic hair.
• one of the videos from court displayed him crying, hiding his face in his hands. You knew these tears were nothing but an act; just a thing everybody expected, or maybe, he wanted to try, and see if the reaction would be to his benefit.
• "The Robin Hood school shooter feels remorse, apologizes to families"
• there were even articles about you, though, in fewer numbers. Still, some theories that you helped Kevin to lock the hall; or that you were his sex toy that he had mercy on. As you went deeper on the internet, there were even accusations of satanism and demonology.
• through the news articles you watched Kevin grow. He turned seventeen, eighteen, then, his hair grew a little. Today, he was being fried in the adult prison. Very soon, there was another school shooting in the same state, so everybody forgot about Kevin Khatchadourian. Plus, he killed so few people; just seven. Weak. Reading this number, every time all these five years, you were taken aback. The whole ordeal felt like it lasted at least an hour. You were seeing everything in slow motion
• the truth was, every time you closed your eyes, for the longest time after, you started seeing Kevin's distorted face. As he grinned with hatred while he was killing your classmates. Little tiger cubs make that face when they learn to roar.
• the latest pictures of him were from the last year; he was a young man of twenty now. His black slick hair brushed back, bruises on his cheekbones. He was a broken man, the light dull in his eyes. Only in the corners of his mouth, there was the old Kevin. The Kevin who laughed at dumb people.
• sooner or later it was inevitable that you started asking yourself questions you couldn't answer. Could I have prevented it? To what degree has he been using me? Why did he spare me? Not like he cared about me? In his eyes, as he looked at me in the yard, there was nothing but resentment.
• you went to see him in prison, thinking about how you looked to someone who hadn't seen you in years. Thinking about your classmates who didn't get to be twenty, nineteen, throwing hats in the air, buying cars, traveling the world.
• all your unrequitted loving, and the dark undulgence, the sense of being the chosen one aside, you thought of those teenagers they used to be and stayed forever, and you wished to be in their place. Because then, you wouldn't have to see Kevin again.
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• he looked worn out, but wild in a way, the same pitch-black hair, the same empty stare. Only, it became completely hollow now. His eyes only lit up for a secons when he saw you entering the room.
• you trembled with the realization that this person on front of you, behind the glass, killed seven people you knew, and was now smiling to you. A grown-up cougar. Unaffected, bored, like your coming was a matter-of-fact occurrence.
• his first question was what took you so long. He thought you'd run with lectures and commeuppances ages ago.
• his face sported a split eyebrow, there was a bruise on his forehead. His cheekbone was cut, it seemed, some time ago already, and a pink scar made his perfect fucking face asymmetrical.
• "Did you get beaten up?" you asked. He replied that he had got into a fight. His knuckles were torn to shreds almost, it was unpleasant to look at them; his skin was pale, pulled over his skull. Black circles around the eyes told you he didn't sleep well. He looked ever more like a vampire. The unpleasant kind, not like from the Vampire Diaries.
• he tried to ask you again, why you didn't visit him earlier. His mum was the only one, he said, who ever came, besides the lawyers and the journalists. You scoffed at it and left it without the answer. His eyes were palpating you, examining. His mouth slightly agape. He hasn't seen a woman, you thought, except his mother, for a very long time.
• "I came to ask you one question", you said, and Kevin made the face of annoyance. You went on anyway. "Why did you kill my friends?" He mocked you. Why did he do it. If only you knew how many people came here and sat in your place, and asked the same stupid question. Have you people no imagination nor consciousness to bore him with that? Like he knew. "Because I could", he spat out, "because I wanted to, and I had the means. Because I was annoyed with those people, and they made me irritated. What reasons do you want? I have no idea why I fucking did it; to piss you off? To make you spend five fucking selfish years thinking about why I fucking did it".
• you were not impressed. You didn't expect a fifteen year old narcissist to comprehend his own actions completely.
• "Why did you spare me then?" He shrugged.
• "Because you were nice to me".
• "I punched you in the face".
• he shrugged again like it didn't matter. But it did matter to him back then.
• you're like a robot, you said, you're not supposed to feel anything for a girl who you fucked and threw out like a sock with dry cum. You're a machine and you shouldn't feel anything. It irritated Kevin, this comparison with an inanimate object. Truth was, you were trying to get to his core, to hurt him as bad as you could, to see if he's still alive at all.
• "What's your point?" why didn't you kill me with the rest of them?
• he clutched the phone and rolled his eyes like you were asking the stupidest possible questions. His eyes then drifted down to your chest, where, propped against the glass, was your arm with an old, long scar from the razor.
• "Why, you have a death wish now?" he whispered. A familiar lustful smile was curling his lips. You noticed another scar on his lip, from someone's fist. It must be tough for the pretty boy here at prison. You wondered if the inmates were afraid of him.
• "I could organise it, you know". You realized he almost never, if ever, called you by your name. At all, as if it didn't exist. You wondered if he even knew your name at all.
• "You can't, you're in prison. You're a rat behind the glass. Do you understand, Kevin, that some of the parents of my dead friends, killed themselves years later?"
• he swayed his head with a question, like, what's he have to do with this information?
• "And", you panted now, "all because of one angry boy, and you're... it's the lack of grey matter in your brain poless, Kevin. You're a psychopath. And it's not good, do you understand, you're less than others. You're a little bit less of a human than the rest of us".
• finally, you saw the look of indignation on him. It was rage and disgust, but so quiet that his face just elongated, like a cat's. He was silent, burying you with his stare.
• "We all need one thing, Kevin. All of us. But you can't have it. It is inaccessible to you. That's why you did it".
• Kevin's nostrils were flaring. You put down the phone and stood up to leave. You could hear him scream through the glass. You caught him right by the balls. He was so smart, so, so intelligent unlike all these dumb people. But he couldn't guess what you meant. All these years he'd been searching for the answer, and it was just out of his reach.
• "What? What is it? What is it? What is it, Y/N?"
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• he got fifteen years, actually. So, he was out when he was thirty. Still very young, all life to live. He pretended a lot in prison to get the appeal, but he was never granted it. Still, just fifteen years, and then he was out.
• you haven't seen him for ten years.
• the 8th of April was shifting further and further from you. Watching all the school shooting happening in the country was strange. Like almost each of them seemed a next chapter to you, like you were supposed to puzzle them all in, into one coherent picture. You changed jobs, you got in and out of relationships, none of which stuck. You didn't talk with your best friend from school, you drifted apart. You moved out and lived alone, acquiring lonely hobbies and observing people.
• the short visit to prison to see Kevin left a bleak impression of frustration. The memory of losing your virginity to him seemed like a minor failure still. You remembered that night very vividly, and now all of the time you were spending with him, was very clear to you.
• looking back, you saw the manipulation and hot and cold approach he practiced on you. You were something of a practice dummy for him. You could travel back in time and stand there next to yourself on the porch of someone's house and watch yourself kiss him for the first time. You could see him now, from a great angle, how he trapped you in his cobweb. How his eyes were never warm or loving, or even interested, but always calculating, measuring. He always looked at you, you realized, as if he was trying to guess your height for a coffin.
• you've never thought of the life 'after'. In your mind, the fifteen years of prison were eternal. You thought it was the period of time during which you would kill yourself
• you tried to learn everything about ASPD as if it could help you in anyway to deal with what had happened.
• the year when he got released, you only learned about it from the news.
• "Kevin Khatchadourian, the Robin Hood shooter, to be released this May". The article reminisced of the tragedy, and speculated on whether fifteen years have shaken Kevin enough for him to become a good boy. Kevin, it said, had gotten a pretty good rehabilitation back in the minor facility, and very rarely was in trouble at prison. He was an excellent inmate, obedient, friendly and very active at the workshops. He worked at the hospital wing and cared for other inmates. You wondered how many people he made die slowly and painfully, getting high on the power he had over them.
• not immediately did it shake you to reality: Kevin was now about to be free in two months. You tried not to stress about it too much. He didn't give a shit about you. Not then, not now. The therapy groups organized specifically for his victims and the families gathered that spring more often than usual. You weren't accepted there, weren't welcome. They couldn't forgive you for surviving.
• a week after his release you noticed Kevin on the other side of the street as you left for work in the morning. You didn't much care and ignored him. But the sight of him was something to think about. His hair was now long, almost to his shoulders. He was broad-shouldered, tall, and even from across the street you could see his warning eyes.
• you were careful not to get any pets or close friends. It wasn't a problem before, and it wasn't now.
• you cut yourself sometimes, and now started to do it more often - every time you caught yourself thinking, finally he's out.
• you've never gone to a proper doctor, only had therapy for five years, which you quit after visiting him in prison. It was all useless, you thought, because I still want him, and even more now. Everything that's happened to you shaped you into this creature of guilt and need.
• but also rage.
• he once held you by the throat and aimed an arrow at you, and since then, you barely felt fear, like someoned switched it off.
• Kevin came to your place. You tried to shut the door into his face, but he caught it. Close up, you could see his face, thin and pale with the lack of sun.
• he wanted to talk to you. Like adults.
• he said that no, you were never that special, but you actively chose him, again and again, and he was interested to find why. When it appeared so easy to make you have sex with him, he lost interest, but then, at the night of the massacre, for some reason, he just didn't feel like killing you
• you were nobody, to each other, he hasn't even thought about you the first five years, before you came to visit.
• then the thought of you became somewhat of obsession
• he probably idealized you
• you asked where he lived now, and he said that his mum bought a flat in the city and had a room for him. You called him pathetic. At first, he didn't react; he looked broken.
• but there was still the same sense of grandeur in him; you, a feeble creature, thought you could outpower him with only your fury and jealousy, indignation at what he'd done
• but, as Kevin once told you, the world was so unfair to little, pretty girls like you
• he threw you on the floor of your kitchen
• you laughed with relief, saying, "Finally! I thought just fifteen years of prison broke you like a dry twig".
• the look of recognition sparked in his eyes; he kneeled over you as if to say something, and you got his nose with your fist
• one would say it was a happy (in the most infernal way) reunion
• you fought, and laughed, and kicked each other, and kissed with the blood dripping heavily in between your mouths. Only there, in the isolated square of your apartment, you could finally confess to yourself that you didn't give a shit about anything; you haven't for some time.
• the blood was smeared on the floor, on the table, on the cupboards of the kitchen from how much you fought and punched each other
• he left you half dead, and redeemed, it felt
• he said that he'd return soon, and he expected you to be there waiting for him. He didn't want you to go to work or see anybody.
• you laughed at this suggestion and got up to tell him something to his face.
• he was in the bathroom, washing his face. The blood was dripping from his nose onto his t-shirt; he looked like a painting
• and paintings are objects you could own.
• you said "Make me"
• and his smile was almost happy; Kevin could only master so much, that it looked like a deranged grin. The time he spent on the bottom of helplessnes in prison, with nothing but his own self, changed the way he smiled. There was nothing behind his eyes when he smiled now.
• he promised he would go out and fuck whoever he wanted, and then return to you, smelling like other women, and there was nothing you could do about it
• you clenched your fists, but you were now so weak you could barely stand. Your whole body ached.
• he helped you shower and washed your hair, tugging on it, giving you instructions, like an idiot, expecting that he had the same control over you
• after work, you go straight home, you don't text with your parents, don't see your friends, every time you leave your house, you tell him where
• you laughed like crazy at these words.
• Kevin, Kevin. His name was like melody. The pain in your body, bruises, were the first thing you felt in a long time, and, coincidentally, they were connected with the feeling of elation you had now, that his hands were on your neck and your shoulders.
• you could fuck whoever you wanted, Kevin, but it would only happen one time, because if you do, I'll cut your balls off
• and to make him sure that you weren't bluffing, you tried to stab him with manicure scissors from the bathroom mirror.
• his reactions were fast, and he caught your hand inches from his face.
• as he looked down at you, sitting in your bathroom in the pool of pink blood, blood on your forehead, your eyes rolling, he thought about the time he finally started paying attention at school. The girl who loved frogs so much she couldn't look at dead ones. Weak-gutted.
• he now almost admired how deranged you have become. At the moment of epiphany he realized he was the one who made you like this. He was so, so happy. Or what he thought was happiness.
• you pulled on his collar, biting your lip, and put his face very close to yours
• "Don't fuck with me". He saw all the fun coming and he didn't have any desire to disobey.
• Look, what was that damn thing you were talking about when you visited?
• you watched his sculpted face and his sharp bones, the tilt of the head and the vampiric malevolence in his eyes. What was love anymore? Would it have made any difference, morally, if you two had met in normal circumstances, and, more importantly, if he was normal? Would you even have fallen for him if he was a good boy?
• this life was a vortex that became tighter and tighter every year. Next to your memories of school, was this confined bathroom, like you existed on all of the planes at the same time. You laughed at your own naive young self that was looking for excuses for Kevin. uwu, his mum didn't want him. He's too pretty to be that bad. He didn't need excuses, he was always the villain. The good people are never that striking, that vivid and suffocating.
• nevermind, Kevin, it doesn't matter. I didn't know what the fuck I was talking about.
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mulders-too-large-shirt · 7 days ago
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s5 episode 19 thoughts
last night’s episode had me singing. clapping my hands together and rejoicing. doing a little twirl, even. so i wonder where we will go from here? 
if i may be so bold as to venture a guess: i would say a two parter leaving on a cliff hanger that is resolved by the movie? 
hmm. i would be happy to be wrong, but we shall see.
post episode thoughts: i think i need to ponder this one for a few months and get back to you. there were things i liked, and other things that frustrated me, which i ended up spending quite a bit of time analyzing. still, i do not mean to be a total hater; my heart was melting at the hospital scene!!!
anyway, back to me from yesterday!
let's read the episode description... mulder is taken hostage?!?! oh, is scully going to go berserk? i am willing to see this. HOWEVER, i would prefer if my boy was left unharmed. maybe the captor will be polite. his poor finger probably still hurts!!!
but, a mulder kidnapping arc is good for me, because i believe being a damsel in distress ought to be a gender neutral role. so let’s see what we have going on
(and the episode is called folie a deux… shoutout to the best fall out boy album)
what if your job was to type into a blocky white computer and call people all day? this could be you, but it is the case for this man, named gary.
he is talking to an uninterested man about siding, and then auto calling someone else. i know these callers well. they plague my job.
an insect is here too, but we don’t have to worry about that. surely the sound design team did not put that in there purposefully for me to notice /s
gary is nervous as he makes another call and hears more insects. i don’t like this. wait, have i seen things about this episode before….?
BUG GUY???? 
gary is shaking with fear. WHAT IS HERE? the bug guy?!?! 
(loud cheering as the intro plays)
short intro….. i clock thee once again
skinner time!!! my heart rejoices at this. why does he have multiple globes in his office? and some books and what looks like trophies under his bill clinton portrait. i wonder if he plays around with them. 
agents mulder and scully are here!!!
uh oh… are they in trouble?!?!
they need to go to chicago to conduct a threat assessment. mulder wants to know why them. “because i prefer you did” <- ohhh yeah, give him the “i told you so” reasoning, skinner 🔥🔥
BAHAHA mulder picks up that the manifesto has “bizarre undertones” right away, which i think is a great way of describing something. and it speaks of a monster stalking employees!! augh. i hope the monster at least allows the workers their legally required breaks. 
(scully looks frustrated)
(mulder nods) "monsters. i’m your boy" <- LMAOOOOO STOPPPPPP WHY IS HE LIKE THIS I’M CRYINGGGG
he’s angry!!! he thinks skinner is mad at him 
“have i finally reached that magic point in my career where every time somebody sees bigfoot or the virgin mary on a tortilla, i get called out of my basement ward to offer my special insight on the matter?” <- oh. oh. i’m laughing, but i do feel a little bad. yeah buddy. that is kind of how you make a living. said with kindness though.
(i know he wants to genuinely know the Truth and find the answers and save his loved ones and learn the mystical secrets of the universe, and that there is angst in this genuine belief being misconstrued as the bigfoot guy, but you can see why such a mistake could get made when he is. you know. the way he is)
“you’re saying i a lot. i heard we” <- YEAHHH SCULLY! GET HIM!!!!!
(augh. and this plot once again fell victim to too much mulder saying i and not enough mulder saying we. probably my biggest complaint with this whole show)
she doesn’t think this case will be a waste of their time, but he says it won’t waste hers, because he will just go by himself! and he’s all pouty as he stalks off, leaving her looking confused. come on, monster boy. stop being emo.
oh, you know the episode is gonna hit when it says written by vince gilligan. i think? he’s the shippy guy, right? i normally don’t pay attention to these things, but people in the comments point out the writers, and he is spoken of positively 
(i googled his name to make sure i was spelling it right, and it turns out he also wrote breaking bad and better call saul. wow! that is a man with some serious credentials!)
so mulder takes off to chicago all by himself to listen to the taped manifesto at the vinyl shop call ceneter. it was sent to the local radio station with the instructions to play it over and over 24 hours a day. the subtitles allow me to know that this is the voice of gary, warning of an evil monster who hides in the light. mulder looks very very bored. 
the boss guy says he’s conducting his own internal investigation, which leads me to believe that he is the bug beast.
not even TWO STEPS OUT THE DOORWAY of that guy’s office and he’s calling scully LMAOOOOO I AM CRYINGGGGG... they cannot be separated or disaster ensues!!! 
he wants her to check on the phrase “hiding in the light”. OH she swivels around at their desk :,) her at the desk makes me so happy!
he recognizes it from an old file!!! “which one? there’s hundreds” “i’m not sure, but i appreciate it” <- AWWW poor scully has to go through 8 million x files looking for a phrase… deep scully sigh as she resigns herself to the glamorous field of archival work. at least he said he appreciated her hard work.
gary sees mulder here and is watching him…. and gary sees his coworkers being called in to talk with the manager. he tells nancy not to go in there!!! “gary, i love you buddy, but you’re really, really weird” damn nancy, get him again lmao
and gary sees the boss go bug mode!! and hears her screaming!! he’s crying while the other manager guy tells him to dial and smile!!
bro is having a complete breakdown… nancy returns to her desk looking like a zombie????? at least to gary. to the camera, she looks pretty normal. things are unclear, narrative-wise.
pretty mulder is listening to the manifesto and taking notes; he has this sort of loopy handwriting i really like. it's a little messy. and he’s written down and then crossed out "obsessive compulsive disorder". “formality of phrasing: desire for authority - to be taken seriously” YEAHHH GO MONSTER BOY GO🔥DO THAT PSYCHOANALYSIS YOU LOVE SO MUCH
meanwhile, gary is gathering ammunition and loading a gun!!!! oh my god????
scully calls!!! she found the phrase and who said it and when and where!!! again, you really cannot out-research her. back in 1992 in florida, a deacon was worried about evil in his church and then showed up and shot people. oh god. and he said “the afflicted ones won’t bleed” hey that’s horrific 
“scully, at the risk of you telling me i told you so, i think it’s time for you to get down here and help me” “i told you so”, she says, smiling <3 
AUGHHHH i need to scream into my hands for a moment
okay. i'm better now. that was just so damn cute.
mulder shows up the next day at the vinyl office place, but it’s empty!!! nancy says to get down… gary points a gun at him!!!! 
scully is pulling in to the parking lot while swarms of police and helicopters are everywhere…. scully introduces herself as agent mulder’s partner. the local FBI team doesn't have any updates on what is going on inside!!!!! 
they want to call him and she says NO. it could put him in danger. this other dude is being condescending to her and she again says NO. we need to find another way. so take that.
oh my god??? inside, gary is making some guy tie everyone up and kneel with their hands behind their heads?? he says the boss is who they should be afraid of and to shut up and stop crying. gary. bro. this is not a good look.
and he says he’s not talking to the people who aren’t human, referring to the first three people the boss took in his office…
mulder is coming in to save the day!!! he asks very calmly why they should be afraid of mr. pincus, claiming that he is here to apply for a job. i can only hope that i could be as calm as him in a hostage situation.
gary says that mr. pincus is a monster who will harvest their souls and turn them into zombies. okay. like in a corporate way or a literal way?
mulder’s slowly moving to grab his gun when gary looks away….
he says everyone needs to hold their breath, and as the local FBI team tries to break in, gary fires at the ceiling!!! maybe he’ll use up all his ammo???? and then mulder can attack???
WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO SCULLY WHEN SHE SAYS NOT TO CALL HIM???? Y’ALL ARE PISSING ME OFF!!!!
so of course his phone goes off when these fools call him, gary sees mulder’s gun, and they lose their ONE SHOT OF SAFETY, and gary slaps mulder across the face and SHOOTS AT SOME GUY WHO DARED TO MOVE OH MY GODDDD YOU BITCHES WHO DON’T LISTEN TO SCULLY ALL ARE GOING TO HELL!!!!!!!!
and gary finds mulder's FBI badge…. he picks up the phone and says he shot a zombie, but didn’t kill him. because he was already dead.
he says he will start killing actual people if they don’t get him on the TV!!!
scully says PUT HIM ON THE TV!!! WE DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS NONSENSE!!!
can they maybe film him and pretend to get it on the TV, and just get it on the local channel so it only broadcasts to the office TV or something????
gary. bro. i’m scared.
mulder tries to remind gary that the guy he killed was a man, but gary says it was a zombie. and that the boss wants to turn them all into drones.
mr. pincus asks a great question: if he is the monster, what does he need all of these people for?? he says to just wait until they put him on the TV.
when they call mulder's cell again, gary answers the phone with “dial and smile” ohhh…. this is truly a man who has had enough of his job
so they’re sending the camera people in…. and scully sees that gary is holding mulder at gunpoint!!!
ohh, they *are* doing a closed circuit broadcast, so gary sees himself on the office TV and no one else will be subjected to him!!! yeah, shoutout to technology.
the cameraman pretends some wires are twisted, which allows the FBI team to see that the wall is clear…. and mulder is forced to lay down…. and now gary’s addressing “the people”
mr. pincus is being held at gunpoint…. and mulder gets in the way… gary’s screaming and screaming at mulder to get him out of the way, but he won’t do it… and scully is WATCHING ALL OF THIS THROUGH THE CAMERA FEED… WHICH IS SO CRAZY
he hears the buzzing again…. and the lights are out…
does mulder see the bug man too?? or is it all in gary’s mind????
the FBI team enters and someone shoots gary. mulder is splattered with blood, but he is looking at mr. pincus suspiciously…… 
GARY WHISPERS “now you know” to him as he lay dying…
HOLY HELL?????????????
what. hey guys! what’s up? what is going on here.
poor pensive mulder is looking off at mr. pincus. “you look exhausted”, says scully, which he instantly denies. and oh, he’s going to talk to him. 
mr. pincus thanks him for saving his life. but mulder is in questioning mode. so mr. pincus had been, at some point, at the other plant where the incident went down a few years earlier, and had been to florida, where the x file case that scully had dug up in the files earlier was. bug guy… real??
scully is very confused. “what’s going on?” she asks softly, and he says he doesn’t know. ohhhh :( he sounded so lost :(
back to washington dc, where mulder is drawing lines on maps. with his poor busted lip and his poor busted finger. someone get him an ice pack
scully is shocked to see him! “mulder, why didn’t you take the day off?” he looks CRAZY and tells her to close the door. 
oh, what must be going through her mind right now…?
he found the phrase “hiding in the light” or variations of it in 5 other x files, but the variations he lists seem pretty different to me. all the other cases were people who said evil was right in front of them but no one else could see it. which seems like a pretty typical x file trope. i'm not sure if he's onto anything here.
she asks what we are all thinking: have you slept? he disregards this and keeps going. 
all of the cases with the phrase variations date back ten years, and that is how long pincus has worked for the vinyl company… hmm…
bro is still in his bloody shirt while trying to convince scully that perhaps a human bug creature could hypnotize its prey into not being visible. please get this man some clean clothes. it is not good to sit around covered in the blood of both yourself and others.
scully does not want to play along with gary's delusions or give them any credit. good for her!
“he was mentally ill. this monster was-was a sick fantasy, a product of his dementia”
(angry mulder nods) “i saw it, too.” (surprised scully face) “does that make me disturbed? demented? does that make me sick, too?” 
ohhhh, there is panic in scully, i am sure, but she is good at not showing it. 
(deep sigh) “no. no, this kind of thing is not uncommon. you… you went through a terrible ordeal, and sometimes people in close associations, under tense conditions, uh, the delusions of one can be passed onto the other” <- ohhhh scully… she is trying so hard to be kind and scientific and to support how he feels without fueling any harmful beliefs. it's a very careful dance.
he is furious though, insisting it’s not a delusion ("it's not folie a deux", he insists in the most american sounding way possible), and i can’t help but think about how his insistence on the existence of bug man fits in with his earlier disgust at being seen as the monster boy. well. you can see how these things happen when we wind up in this sort of situation.
he wants to prove that the people gary pointed out as not human really were turned into zombies somehow… maybe they can give them a checkup under the guise of “damn, y’all just went through some wild stuff”, but all i can think about is getting that man a fresh shirt and a nice long shower. can we give them a check up when you’re clean? please? thank you. bloodborne pathogens are scary.
scully refuses to autopsy the body- saying she won’t feed into the delusions- and he says he’ll prove it without her and storms off. 
she must be so worried about him...... he's clearly not himself
oh shoot… he goes to gary’s place and finds the same map tracking pincus that he had made!!! and then mulder sees a zombified nancy outside!!! he’s running off, but the guy he's with doesn’t see anyone!!!!
now she’s driving off with pincus… where are they going???
scully is here to talk to skinner. he wants to know: why is mulder being weird? 
AND WHY DID HE GET HER SCHEDULED TO DO AN AUTOPSY AFTER SHE SAID NO???? skinner KNOWS something is up and asks if there’s something she wants to tell him. she says “no, sir” and walks away, leaving him behind, confused
okay. so i feel like plotwise, i’m going to be annoyed if mulder is right, because he is acting really wild, and i get that it’s an intense situation, but you need to respect your partner. and listen to her and not make her do things that she refused to do. if he is behaving like he is having a break in his sanity, and scully is treating him with the care that this sort of situation affords, but then it turns out he was the only one clever enough to see the truth for the billionth time, making scully the scorned skeptic... well, it gets old after 5 seasons.
and we know that while he is often right about things, he is also incredibly prone to believing, and this can take him to self-destructive lengths, such as letting a guy put k in your brain until scully has to throw herself on him like a weighted blanket so he doesn't end things permanently. so. i don’t always trust his judgement.
but maybe she’s thinking, if i just autopsy the damn guy, we can get this over with.
all that being said: skinner’s confused face is so funny, lmao
scully does not want to do an autopsy. she’s outsourced it to someone else! i appreciate her sticking to her guns.
she’s trying to call mulder, but the guy doing the autopsy says it looks like the shooting victim has been dead for 2-3 days… and she says no, he died yesterday. HMM. weird. you can see the realization on her face…. something weird is going on here. but is it as strange as mulder claims?
pincus is going… somewhere. well, you better believe mulder is tailing him. hard for a guy that tall to be stealthy. 
he moves the picnic table to look into the window of this house, and he sees the bug guys!!! then he breaks in, seeing an eyeless woman and a bug guy crawling behind him!!! breaking and entering... not a good look
the CGI is killing me lmao. bro is leaning out the window. LMAO WHAT THE HELL I’M HOWLING LOOK AT THE BUG GUY SCURRYING AWAY BAHAHAAAAAAAAAA 
we need to appreciate this for a moment. crazed mulder breaking into some rando's house and shooting at the human-sized bug.
bug guy jumps off of the roof!!!
skinner is listening to the woman whose house he broke into testify… she says she felt a presence creeping towards her… and then this madman was in her house (pan to mulder) uh oh!!! one of many times mulder could have been fired, tbh!!!
she says he was screaming about monsters more than gary!! and then she leaves saying he shouldn’t carry a gun!!!
oh, mulder... what are we going to do with you?
pincus stays behind… oh, skinner is going to go nuclear on mulder if he opens his mouth to call him a monster one more time… poor skinner…….. pincus says he still considers mulder a hero for helping with the hostage situation, which is why he wants to handle this privately
LMAOOOO WAIT MULDER YELLED MORE AND NOW SKINNER IS SCREAMING AT HIM AND MULDER SEES PINCUS TURN INTO BUG MAN RIGHT BEHIND HIM!!!!!!!!! HOLD ONNNN IT’S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY BUT IT LOOKS SO SILLY I CANNOT HELP BUT LAUGH
skinner has to pin him down after he pulls out his gun!!!! oh my god!! he is gonna get fired for real!!!
(funny how often skinner and mulder come to physical blows. i just think it's neat)
mulder is in the hospital in chicago, and scully slips her hand into his (stop. i’ll cry. hey i’ll cry) and he says “five years together, scully. you must have seen this coming” <- HEY IS HE GETTING FIRED FOR REAL?? or just announcing the formal loss of his sanity?!
she says they more or less found what they thought they would find in the body… it looked more decomposed than it ought to have… but that really isn't unusual
oh, look how pained she looks as she listens to him try and explain the monster. he says pincus bit the lady whose house he broke into's neck. now is this a bug or a vampire? i guess those two categories have some commonality
she says the case is closed, and she only has hope he can see past this delusion AUGHHHH
i am imagining being scully in this situation and how much it would hurt to see your bestie and partner like this.......
“you have to be willing to see” “i wish it were that simple” “scully, you have to believe me. nobody else on this whole damn planet does or ever will” OUGHHHHHHHHH
:( :( :( monster boy......
“you’re my… one in five billion” OHHH. HE SAID THE THING. THE BLOGS QUOTE HIM SAYING THE THING ALL THE TIME. AND HE SAID IT!!! AND MY HEART DID A FLIP.
look at her looking at him……
that feeling when your bestie is out of his mind, begging you to believe in the bug men, and he says you're his soul mate.......... yeah.
back to autopsy land. this other dude is very confused as to why she wants to flip him over. AUGH. bites! bug bites!
she is shaving the dead body's head. which is not something i ever thought you had to do, but here we are. she shaves that dead body like a pro. and AUGH. more bites. 
poor mulder is being restrained and shot up with stuff :( our pathetic man is suffering…….. 
he hears insects!!! did they bite him too???
NOOO!!! he sees the insect!! he’s screaming for the nurse!!!
he sounds absolutely wild as he tries to convince her there’s something at the window, and for her to let him go. oh, she opens the window…. is there something on her neck……. it looked like... juice?? gag.
he hears more insects…. i think it’s coming in his room?? it’s climbing on the wall?? 
OH SHIT!! the nurse is not letting scully in!!! and she sees her as a zombie, too???
SCULLY PARANORMAL MOMENT?!?!
OH, SHE BURSTS INTO HIS ROOM AS HE’S SCREAMING, AND SHOOTS THE BUG MAN!!!!
she’s looking at the window like wtf… am i going to have to pay to get that fixed…? and also was that really a bug man...? a lot of important questions are being communicated despite the lack of works
while he’s still fighting his restraints…
cut to a baffled skinner. “agent scully, i have to say, i’m at a bit of a loss here” LMAOOOO me too girl
“do i infer correctly from this that you believe there’s some… merit to agent mulder’s claims?”
(god, i typed "clams" at first. i wish there was merit to his clams)
this is shocking, but not unheard of. listen! scully just wants answers, okay? and sometimes they lie in the category of science yet to be explained.
(long scully pause) “i believe that agent mulder is mentally sound and fit for duty. aside from that belief, i can only present to you the few hard facts that i've been able to gather” <- queen of giving a measured response in a purple suit 
oh shoot!! there was a toxin in the spine of the shooting victim!! and pincus is gone without a trace, with 6 other key witnesses!! including the nurse!!!
skinner wants to know what the intruder looks like… she deflects that it was dark. that is all we hear her say, even though i wouldhave loved to know how that conversation ended.
scully and mulder reunite as they enter an elevator. “what did you tell him?”, he asks her. “the truth… as well as i understand it” “which is?” (long scully pause) “folie a deux… a madness shared by two”
hey. why does it sound like she knows french when she said that? because i know that mulder took french, but he said it as american as possible. however, she took german and said that pretty darn well. 
blushing a little.
AUGH, and a new company for WINDOWS has insect noises going on at the call center!!!
and so, the monsters continue to spread, ready at any moment to end humanity; a typical ending to an episode.
well. what did i think of this one?
hmm. i’m not sure. i was hoping mulder was going off the deep end rather than him being the most specialist boy of all who can once again see what the rest of the world cannot. he’s right too often, and we end up in the same situation where scully refuses to listen to his theories on account of the fact that he sounds crazy, and then he lowkey bullies her into doing what he asks rather than always considering her input, and then he ends up being right.
someone once got mad on one of my posts and said scully hates mulder (lmao. can you imagine?) because she never believes him even though he tends to be right. and buddy, i cannot really accept that as valid criticism, even beyond the whole point of the show being that yeah, they don't see eye to eye on supernatural matters. that is the most watsonian explanation to an incredibly clear doylist pattern, which is that mulder is the most special boy of all in this show and he knows all of the things and everyone else is a mere fool. this pattern annoys me greatly.
i just think it's funny (said with sarcasm) that someone would take the watsonian, in-universe explanation that hates on the woman character rather than acknowledge the fact that the writers clearly had a bias between the two. lmao.
and yeah. there are elements of both. scully is both purposefully written as stubborn in the face of his outlandish theories due to her loyalty to science as an element of her character, AND purposefully written as the one who naively refuses to believe mulder as some sort of audience proxy, because augh, that woman, she just won't believe our most special gifted genius agent mulder!
you can see how those two things work together, but one is clearly the result of the other. character decisions come from writers who often have their own biases and agendas rather than out of some mysterious creative ether from which a character emerges fully formed.
and poor skinner, trying to deal with mulder's often violent impulses. 
i think it’s very interesting that scully believes herself and him to be victims of a shared madness. it’s the most logical belief for her to have, but it also places this kind of… like, concerning element to them being together. is everything they have experienced a shared madness? or just this after the trauma of him being held hostage? how can you trust your memory? how can you trust what you see? 
i also think it’s very interesting how she refuses to feed his delusions at all when he proposed the idea. she would not do the autopsy. and from his psych training standpoint, i imagine that he knew she would say that, but was still hoping against hope because he was so out of his right mindset. she stuck to what she believed would help him recover, which is really admirable and doctor-y of her.
god, her slipping her hand into his as he’s in the hospital…
see, this is the problem with this show. it’s got me philosophizing on the meaning of the bug men. first of all, if they’re the ones in charge of call centers, i’m not really that surprised. corporate work turns you into a zombie; you don’t have time for passions or pursuits of your own, you just work for the shareholder. i get that interpretation. 
but other than that, what are we to think of the bug men? are we to call into question the things that we see? are we to believe the manifestos and ramblings of people like gary? 
i’m going to probably just assume it was a sort of “wouldn’t it be fucked up if…” situation the writers concocted. yeah it *would* be fucked up if there were bug guys in the call center taking over america through ceaseless barrages of advertising. you've got me there, vince.
my feelings on mulder’s behavior are complicated. maybe it was a shared madness between them *and* there were some shady bug things going on. him sitting there still the day after the hostage situation, having gotten no sleep, still in his bloody shirt, drawing lines on the map… i mean, he did not seem well, even for a guy famed for his bouts of obsessive focus. 
i am going to think on this one for a bit. perhaps a more coherent train of thought will arise. but for now, i have written a treatise on the nature of this show's frustrating parts while also highlighting the parts that made me giggle. like "i told you so" and scully's good french and mulder's terrible french and holding hands and undying love <3
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ornii · 1 year ago
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Folie a Deux IV: Jealousy
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(I also Made an alternate Cover! Don’t know why)
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A college student finally finished their midterm exams and makes their way back to the dorm. First thing they do when they enter is check YouTube and spot the perfect video.
Jenna Ortega and (F/n) (L/n) answer the Webs most searched questions. It plays as the two sit casually together.
“Hello I’m Jenna Ortega.”
“And I’m (F/n) (L/n), and we’re here to Answer the Webs most searched questions about us.”
The video begins as the duo take a board and answer various internet searches. (Y/n) tears off one.
“Is (Y/n)… Blind.” He said, he turns to the camera, staring at it as people try not to laugh.
��…No.” He answers, “It was just a Character I was playing, I’m not actually blind, but what I will say is that acting blind is a lot harder than you think.” He explains, Jenna eyes him as he looks at her.
“Okay so let’s say we’re doing a scene, and I have to listen to you, I can’t look directly at you even though I obviously want to, I have to basically look in your general direction but not directly at you.” He said, she nodded, admitting that makes sense.
“He’s smarter than he looks she says jokingly, the interviewer continues as another question pops up.
“How did.. Jenna Ortega and (F/n) (L/n) meet.” She said, “it was… the Grammys?” She Said and (Y/n) nodded.
“Yeah it was the 2020? I remember they told I was gonna sit next to Orgeta so I thought, “oh it’s probably Brian Orgeta or something.” This was my first Awards show so I was obviously anxious and I had a few things in my brain to say to break the ice, well it didn’t end well. I look to my left and this, beautiful girl just sat down next to me and, you remember the old windows PC’s and that blue screen sound effect they make? That was my brain.” He explains without cracking a single smirk, Jenna pursed her lips, trying not to laugh, also because he said she was beautiful.
“But yeah, ever since that, and us getting casted in Wednesday we’ve been friends ever since.”
“Yeah, Friends.” She mutters.
With the last question, they both tear it off and say in unison. “Are Jenna Ortega and (F/n) (L/n).. dating.” They look to the camera to speak but the video, hilariously and abruptly ends.
“So they cut the video for dramatic effect?” (Y/n) Asks Miss Ortega as he sits at a marble table inside a beautiful kitchen, it was part of a beautiful villa in Tuscany Italy. He asks the girl walking out of the room putting on a pair of gorgeous golden earrings, her hair done so well, adorning a beautiful gold trimmed Princess Line dress. He saw her and much like before, his brain couldn’t fathom her beautiful, he simply stood up and walked to the window, looking out to see the gorgeous countryside and it’s beautiful hills, perfectly matched by the slowly setting sun.
“I really appreciate you coming with me.” He said, “I mean getting invited to some ball was pretty scary.” He explains, Jenna shook her head. “It’s funny to hear that, I’ve been doing this since I was a kid, it’s natural to me.” She explains, walking next to him she also looks out the window. Taking in the slowly setting sun over the beautiful Italian mountainside.
“I could look at this forever.” She said, reveling in the beauty of the moment. (Y/n) nods, his phone suddenly rings, checking it was his manager and he reluctantly answers.
“Hello? Oh, yeah I’m just waiting I— oh, she did?” He said, Jenna turns to him, her interest growing in his conversion.
“That’s, fine? Okay.” He hangs up, and turns to Jenna.
“Apparently Olivia’s going too, so that’s fun.” He said, Jenna was taken aback slightly. Not expecting someone else.
“It’ll be nice to see her at least, cmon we should get going.”
The two were escorted, mostly driven to there. (Y/n) was humming to “Good 4 U”. Jenna, having a taste for music picks up.
“You must really like that song.” She said and (Y/n) nods, “Love it. Actually, I guess the boys version I made was okay, but nothin compares to the original.”
“Boys?” She replied, and (Y/n) reluctantly shows a video, it was a small recap of it all. (Y/n) releasing a version that swaps the protagonists of the song. Not to diss Olivia but to show that breakups are nasty on both ends. Turns out, Olivia loved it, and obviously retweeted it.
“Breakups suck on both ends a lot of times, it’d be like if you and I stopped being friends, we’d both be hurt.” He explains, Jenna sees the look in his eyes, she always found he was always honest, even if it was painful and the look in his Eyes, he would be hurt if they stopped. Jenna reached out, her hand almost grabbing his, until the vehicle stopped, they halted and prepared to make center stage, as the door opened (Y/n) stepped out first, adjusting his suit he then turns to the door and reaches out for Jenna, she smiles, taking his hand and steps out. The duo make their presence known.
Cameras flash and (Y/n) was still a bit novice at this, Jenna took it for the moment to make her power move, her arm wrapped around his and he was surprised but didn’t make any attempt to stop her, the two walk in to the Ball, adores with tapestry and music, it felt like the 1900’s once more, a whimsical prince with a beautiful princess on his arm, this was a fantasy to many, but a dream come true for (Y/n).
It was mostly mingling and talking, the two keeping close to each other. While they weren’t locked arms they were still in yelling distance, mingling and enjoying the ambiance. Staying in the Limelight, but something caught (Y/n) in the corner of his eye, a girl with sleek black hair approaching, in a large silver Ball gown, it was Olivia. She smiled and approached, (Y/n) was caught off guard by another beautiful woman talking to him first!
“(Y/n)?” She asks. (Y/n)s pep picked up and he smiles.
“Yeah, it’s nice to meet you!” He offers a handshake and Olivia kindly shakes it. Yeah we’ve talked on the internet before but, it’s weird in person.
“You come here alone?” (Y/n) asks.
“Yeah, it was nice to not be on tour or stuck making music, good to get out, you?” She replies, (Y/n) looks over.
“No, Jenna’s with me.” He said, Olivia nods in jest, “A nice date night then huh?” She said.
“What? No it’s, she came as a friend, I’m not too good with people.” (Y/n) awkwardly admits. Olivia looks around for a moment, spotting Miss Ortega, who sees the two chatting and, isn’t in the most enjoyable mood. Olivia smiles.
“Hey, Mind if we talk in private? Something I want to run by you.” She asks, (Y/n) casually agrees and Jenna watches the two walk away to a more secluded part of the Ballroom. Her frown was very prominent, and she sulked after, slowly following them. They pass by a pillar To the outside and Jenna has lost their trail, listening to any talking she picks something up, she follows past a pillar and to smaller balcony, she was suddenly stopped as (Y/n) came around the corner. They almost bumped into each other.
“Oh! Sorry!” (Y/n) said, Jenna’s worry faded as she looks around.
“It’s fine, so, what were you up to?” She asked.
“Olivia.” He said at first, “she wants to collaborate on a song, first collab for me!” He said with a giddy smile. Jenna couldn’t help herself with a smile. (Y/n) walks out to the Balcony and Miss Ortega soon follows.
“So, music?” She asked, “Yeah, she’s working on something called.. “Vampire.” Can’t say much more.”
“You aren’t taking any more acting roles, are you?” She said, a hint of sadness on it.
“I don’t know… I’m not really fit for it. I mean I had my first kiss on a Netflix show, am I really made for this?” He says to her, Jenna shrugs off his fears.
“It’s a rough thing at first but… wait, First?” She asks, not fully catching that first part. (Y/n), lacking any awareness nods.
“Yeah, that scene we did after my character did that whole speech and Wednesday had that vision.” He explains, Jenna blinks a few times in disbelief.
“Was I..?” She asks, trailing on. (Y/n) awkwardly nods. “Yeah, you were my first Kiss. So, how did I do?” He admits, for the moment the roles were reversed, Jenna was the dumbfounded fool whose heart skipped a bit. Jenna’s face was perfectly lit by the moonlight which hid her growing blush, she turns to face the party, hiding her smile so much.
“You did… you did fine..” she said, and calmly but confidently walked back to the Ball.
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mystra-midnight · 29 days ago
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— FOLIE À DEUX | chapter iii
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pairing: feyd-rautha harkonnen x atreides ! ofc (leiana)
tags: brief physical assault. political intrigue. arranged marriage. making out. some physical violence between brothers.
w/c: 3.1k.
a/n: I hope you all know how truly grateful I am for your love and support. Thank you to everyone who has commented, left kudos, bookmarked and subscribed to this story. I love and appreciate you all. <3 <3 <3
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In the days following, Leiana had yet to see or hear from Feyd-Rautha.
The Baron had allowed her to sleep in her own chambers instead of the prison cells. And there she remained, granted a small measure of freedom but still a prisoner of war. There was not a single person within the estate that gave her the time of day. Leiana suspected this was because her only escape would be over the balcony rail, and she would not survive the fall.
So she'd kept herself busy by collecting her belongings, strewn about the room: here, there, and everywhere. It was strange, as though she was viewing the ruins of her life as a bystander and not living it. She felt disconnected from reality as she went through the wreckage, salvaging what she could.
Gifts given to her by her father were broken, as was the bodice dagger Paul had given her on their sixteenth birthday. It had broken that night, stabbed into the neck of a Harkonnan attacker. Tears burned at the back of her throat as she thought of all that was lost to the sands of time: late-night conversations and whispered words as they hid in the dark instead of sleeping. Training sessions with their mother, the uncomfortable echo of her voice in her mind as she prepared the twins for the Gom Jabbar. Dinners with their father, his terrible jokes and kind smile.
On the third day of her isolation, two guards opened the doors to her chambers without knocking, as though they had the right to intrude upon the only sanctuary she had left. Both were Harkonnan: pale-skinned and dressed in black, as though for a funeral. 
"The Baron requests your presence."
Leiana noticed his speech and lack of formality as though he was neither pleased nor upset with overseeing an enemy of House Harkonnan. From her perch on the small balcony, a book resting in her lap, she watched them. One of the guards had a tight grip on the pommel of his sword as though he was prepared for an attack. He did not need to speak; his actions spoke for him. He would not hesitate to kill her should she give him a reason. 
"May I inquire as to what for?"
"He is announcing your engagement to the Na-Baron."
This revelation made her hesitate, for she knew it would be the moment that sealed her fate. Though, in truth, the dinner with Feyd had already done that, and the kiss he'd forced onto her had been the nail in the coffin that forever trapped her. Leiana felt a visceral reaction to the memories, as if they were ghosts from her past, haunting her every step. Each had been seared unto her memory: the taste of his tongue as it explored her mouth, the strength of his fingers as he'd pulled her hair, the way she'd fallen under his spell, however briefly, as though she was a weaker woman, a younger, love-struck fool.
Her instincts waged war within her—fight or flight. Yet it didn't matter, for she had no say. Leiana swallowed, her throat suddenly dry. The guards waited for her response, but none came. Instead, she stood, sweeping from the room with haughty grace, expecting them to follow or be left behind.
The two men exchanged a quick glance before following. As she moved through the halls, she could feel the weight of their eyes on her back. She tried not to think about what this moment could entail or let her imagination run wild with possibilities. Still, it was hard when everything around her seemed so surreal.
All too quickly, they reached the throne room. Leiana hesitated at the threshold, surprised to find it filled with people. Her heart raced, thundering against her ribcage, as she looked to where the Baron sat upon his throne. His expression was stern and unreadable, and his gaze was distant as it swept across the room to her. At his side stood Glossu Rabban with a smug expression.
At that moment, she understood this for what it was: a political ploy.
Rabban did not know his brother was on Arrakis or that he had been disinherited. He still believed that when Vladamir died, he would inherit a kingdom. Worse still, he still thought that she would be married to him, and that dream was about to be shattered.
Her heart thundered, its beats akin to the sound of horses' hooves. For a moment, she met the Baron's eyes, spider-like and gleaming with amusement that did not show on his face. Leiana could not speak, not with so many present. And so, with her hands metaphorically tied, she bowed, taking low to the ground so that her dress flourished on the floor at her feet.
"My Lord," she said, her voice submissive and demure despite the tension crawling beneath her skin. As she stood, she was ushered to stand at his side and, much to her displeasure, Glossu Rabban's side. Her stomach churned uncomfortably. His fingerprint bruises lingered on her skin even now.
As the minutes passed, more people poured into the room. She sensed the Beast shift closer until his body brushed against hers. Leiana remained as still as stone, a statue carved from the mountains of Arrakis, unmoving. As though unaware of his nephew's actions or simply unfazed by them, the Baron spoke, his voice a thick rasp.
"Time and again, House Harkonnan has survived through strength and suffering," he began, though all too soon, his voice faded to static noise as her personal space was more deeply invaded. Rabbans' hand fell upon her body, thick, meaty fingers taking a greedy handful of her arse. Leiana bit into her cheek until she tasted blood, his nails dipping into her skin through the light fabric of her dress, his grip tightening to the point of pain.
She remained stubborn; having passed the test with the Gom Jabber, she would pass this one also.
His breath tickled her neck as he leaned in. "I have been waiting days for this moment, my Lady," he said, his voice so low that only she heard it, as though what he had to say was a terrible secret not meant for their peers. Leiana fought to hide how she shivered, how it twisted down her spine and left her skin textured with goosepimples, and instead focused her gaze on the doors across the room. She busied herself by imagining her escape: like a bird, she would flock from the room, lost in the desert winds, never to be caught again.
Rabban did not appear to have noticed. He seemed preoccupied with the curve of her arse as he began pawing at it. "Tonight," he said, his voice still low, dripping with salacious intent. "Tonight, I am going to come to your room and show you the desires of a man. You are going to be my whore, Lady Atreides."
"Is now the time for this, Rabban?" She answered, her voice even and calm despite the disgust worming through her limbs. Her every muscle was taut with tension, the set of her shoulders ridged, but a fire was blazing in her eyes. "Your uncle is speaking." Leiana did not lower her voice, allowing it to carry to those nearby and paint him as disrespectful, not her. 
She saw the Baron's eyes flick toward them, and the faint curl of his lip, yet his words continued. "I have the duty of announcing that Lady Leiana Atreides has renounced her allegiance to the traitor house she was born into. She has sworn herself to House Harkonnan." A murmur went through the gathered crowd, their attention flitting between her and the Baron. 
Her face burned with shame, and her cheeks flushed with anger. She wanted to run and escape this nightmare, yet it was not an option. Her gaze joined the Baron's, his spider eyes twinkling with malice. "To prove her loyalty, she has agreed to marry my nephew, the Na-Baron."
Rabban's hand clasped onto her hip, his fingers pressing so hard into her skin that she thought they might cut down to the bone. He dragged her against him, into the shelter of his body, so that she was pressed tightly against him. Her body shuddered as she tried to move away, unable to escape his grasp. Rabban was enormous, his broad shoulders enough to block her from view if he was to stand in front of her. He made her feel impossibly small. 
Leiana looked up at him, glaring hotly.
"Feyd-Rautha," the Baron said.
Once more, the crowd murmured, both Harkonnan loyalists and those who had betrayed House Atreides. Leiana felt the tension seep through Rabban's body: the way he froze, motionless, and how his fingers pressed harder, harder, harder, into her skin until she couldn't suppress the whine of pain that tumbled from her lips. She turned to him, pushing against the wall of his chest to try and distance him.
The doors opened wide, revealing Feyd-Rautha. He stood tall and proud, adorned in the blackened armour of House Harkonnan, a sword strapped to each hip, glittering dangerously. He looked immaculate, the pride of his noble house. As he entered, the murmurs of the gathered nobles hushed, all eyes turning to his imposing figure.
His gaze swept the room, cold and calculating, assessing each face. When he saw Rabban, his hand possessive on her hip, she saw his eyes darken, narrowing into a glare. He walked with purpose and grace, long strides carrying him forward until he kneeled at his uncle's feet. Leiana recognized the gesture for what it was: hollowed respect. He did not care for his uncle. In fact, she would go so far as to say he hated him. 
"What is this?"
Rabban's voice shattered the silence, earning an unamused glare from both the Baron and Feyd, who slowly rose to stand and turned to face him. Her eyes met with his, silent and pleading, and while her lips barely moved, her voice, the Voice, rattled uncomfortably within his skull. Fire flashed in the depth of his eyes, pure hatred, at her, at him, leaving behind scorched earth. He might as well have been carved from stone, for he did not move.
Leiana saw the tension seep through him like a snake, watched how it wrapped around his organs, how it strangled him. The Baron shifted to look at Rabban. It was a subtle gesture, yet his emotions were like knives glittering in the morning light, ready to cleave flesh down to the bone. It was as though he was offended by his nephew's audacity.
“Please,” her lips parted again, not a whisper but an exhale.
"You need to learn not to touch my belongings, brother," Feyd rasped, his dangerous growl reverberating through the room's silence. His eyes locked onto Rabban with a glare that promised retribution. Extending a hand toward Leiana, he left no room for defiance. Sensing the underlying menace in Feyd's tone, she took his hand without hesitation. The moment her fingers touched his, he yanked her away from Rabban's grasp with a strength that sent her stumbling.
She collided against his chest with a force that drove the air from her lungs, leaving her gasping in surprise. Feyd's arm, muscular and unyielding, wrapped around her waist with a possessive intensity, purposefully pulling her against him. His hold was firm, almost bruising, a silent declaration of dominion over her. His lips crashed down on hers, the kiss abrupt and demanding. She gasped, a small sound of shock that he effortlessly silenced, his mouth swallowing the noise. His lips were hot and insistent, a vivid display of his possessiveness.
His tongue slid along the edge of her teeth, exploring with a predatory precision. His taste was intoxicating, a heady mix of something dark and forbidden. Her own tongue responded instinctively, meeting his in a fierce dance. The intensity of the kiss left her breathless, her senses overwhelmed by the sheer force of his claim. She angled her head, opening herself to him further, leaning into his solid form.
Everything Feyd did was quietly calculated, yet he kissed like a starved man, uncaring who saw or who might try to intervene. Not that anyone would dare; Leiana would wager everything that the Na-Baron would slice down any fool brave enough to attempt it. His hand fisted in her hair, weaving through her dark locks. He tugged her head back, angling it to his desire, commanding her submission with a ruthless tenderness. 
The crowd whispered among themselves, their voices not registering in her mind as they should have. There was only Feyd—the taste of his lips on hers, the wet glide of his tongue exploring her mouth, the relentless strength of his fingers tugging on her hair, the way he swallowed her soft moan with a deliberate growl. Leiana melted against him, her fingers curling around the chest plate of his armour, clinging to him as if he were an anchor in a storm.
Rabban's expression twisted in something akin to disgust, perhaps anger. When Feyd pulled away, their lips separated with a sinful sound. Hers were glistening and kiss-bitten. A heavy silence stretched until Feyd finally spoke, his voice dripping with cold venom. He did not turn to face his brother. His eyes were on her, drinking in how she stared at him as though he hung the moon and stars. "Consider this your first and only warning. Next time, there will be consequences."
Rabban made a sound in response. "You always did have a penchant for dramatics, little brother," he sneered, stepping forward, his bulk casting a long shadow over them. Feyd's eyes narrowed, a dangerous glint flashing in their depths. 
"Careful, Rabban. You wouldn't want to start something you can't finish."
Rabban's eyes flashed red with anger, and without hesitation, he lunged at Feyd. The crowd, taken by surprise, gasped and instinctively stepped back, creating a wider circle around the two men. Feyd's grip tightened on her, his fingers digging into her skin painfully as he yanked her to the side, flinging her behind him with a force that sent her sprawling onto the cold, hard ground.
Feyd faced Rabban's charge with a poised and calculated stance, his movements fluid and precise. His eyes locked onto Rabban's, reading the fury and recklessness in his opponent's approach. As Rabban's massive form barreled toward him, Feyd's muscles coiled with anticipation. He sidestepped deftly at the last possible moment, his movements a blur of grace and speed.
With a swift, well-placed punch, Feyd drove his fist into Rabban's ribs, feeling the satisfying impact reverberate through his knuckles. Rabban let out a guttural grunt of pain, staggering slightly but quickly regaining his footing. His face twisted into a mask of rage, eyes burning with a desire for retribution.
The larger man swung a powerful fist, aiming for Feyd's head with all his might. Feyd, his reflexes honed to perfection, ducked just in time, the blow grazing the air above him. The force of the swing caused Rabban to overextend, leaving him momentarily off-balance.
The crowd watched in stunned silence, their collective breath held in anticipation. The tension was thick, a living thing that thrummed through the hall, making every heartbeat feel like an eternity. Rabban, undeterred, readied himself for another attack, his muscles bunching in preparation. But before he could move, a booming voice cut through the air, commanding submission. 
“Enough!”
Rabban halted mid-stride, his chest heaving, and turned red-faced toward his uncle. Feyd straightened, his eyes never wavering from his brother, but he remained silent, his demeanour cold and calculating. The Baron stood from his throne, suspensors hissing as they carried his impressive girth. “This petty squabble ends now.” His voice brokered no arguments. “You are both sons of House Harkonnan. Do not disgrace my name with such undignified behaviour.”
Leiana imagined that had the room not been filled with their peers then he would have gleefully watched his nephews fight to the death. As it was, Rabban clenched his fists, his anger simmering beneath the surface of his skin, and nodded reluctantly. Feyd bowed his eyes slightly in acknowledgement, his expression harsh. As the Baron moved to leave the room, he cast a final, warning glance to his nephews.
"Remember your place, Rabban. I have given you grace and time to prove yourself. And you have failed time and again," he said, his tone icy. "Feyd is to be my heir. He will marry the girl. And I will hear no more on the matter."
With the Baron’s words still echoing in the room, the crowd began to disperse, their hushed whispers and speculations slowly fading into silence. The spectacle was over, and the guests, ever mindful of the fragility of their positions and the prying eyes of the Baron, resumed their activities with a calculated nonchalance. Rabban exited after his uncle, leaving her alone with Feyd once more.
Feyd watched Rabban's retreating form, a small, triumphant smile curling at the corners of his lips. The encounter had gone just as he had planned, every move calculated to assert his dominance and undermine Rabban's authority. His eyes scanned the room, ensuring the immediate danger had passed before he turned his attention to the woman he had flung aside in the heat of the confrontation.
His demeanour shifted but was no less dangerous as he extended a hand toward her. "Are you all right?" he asked, his voice softer. She hesitated momentarily before accepting his hand, her fingers trembling as she rose. Her eyes, wide with relief and wariness, met his.
"Yes, thank you."
His hand was on her throat before she could finish brushing the dust from her dress. His thumb pressed hard against her windpipe, halting her breaths and silencing her voice as he dragged her against his chest once more. Leiana caught his wrist with both hands, clawing at his pale skin as she had done to Rabban days ago.
Feyd's grip tightened. "You think you can manipulate me with the Voice?" he hissed, his breath hot against her face, making her blink, making the first of her tears fall. "Try it again, and I will end you where you stand."
Leiana's vision blurred at the edges as she struggled for air. Her nails dug deeper into his wrist, desperate for release, drawing globules of blood to the surface, but Feyd's hold remained steadfast. She could feel the thrum of his pulse beneath her fingertips.
"Your life hangs by a thread, and I hold the scissors."
With a final, ruthless squeeze, he released her, watching with satisfaction as she crumpled to the ground, gasping for breath. Feyd stood over her, a dark silhouette against the dim light, a silent reminder of the peril that shadowed her every move.
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—interested in being tagged in future chapters? send me a message!
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vampylily · 1 year ago
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Transcription of Fall Out Boy's interview with Rock Sound
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Since I was going to read the article anyways, I thought I'd transcribe in case it'll be more accessible to read for others. The interview with Pete and Patrick goes in depth on the topics of tourdust, evolving as a band, So Much (For) Stardust, working with Neal Avron, and more.
Thank you to @nomaptomyowntreasure who kindly shared the photos of the article! Their post is linked here.
PDF link here. (more readable format & font size)
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article in text below (and warning for long post.)
Rock Sound Issue #300
WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE
WITH THE TRIUMPHANT ‘SO MUCH (FOR) STARDUST’ CAPTURING A WHOLE NEW GENERATION OF FANS, FALL OUT BOY ARE RIDING HIGH, CELEBRATING THEIR PAST WHILE LOOKING TOWARDS A BRIGHT FUTURE. PETE WENTZ AND PATRICK STUMP REFLECT ON RECENT SUCCESSES AND THE LESSONS LEARNED FROM TWO DECADES OF WRITING AND PERFORMING TOGETHER. 
WORDS: James Wilson-Taylor
PHOTOS: Elliott Ingham
You have just completed a US summer tour that included stadium shows and some of your most ambitious production to date. What were your aims going into this particular show? 
PETE: Playing stadiums is a funny thing. I pushed pretty hard to do a couple this time because I think that the record Patrick came up with musically lends itself to that feeling of being part of something larger than yourself. When we were designing the cover to the album, it was meant to be all tangible, which was a reaction to tokens and skins that  you can buy and avatars. The title is made out of clay, and the painting is an actual painting. We wanted to approach the show in that way as well. We've been playing in front of a gigantic video wall for the past eight years. Now, we wanted a stage show where you could actually walk inside it. 
Did adding the new songs from ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ into the setlist change the way you felt about them?
PATRICK: One of the things that was interesting about the record was that we took a lot of time figuring out what it was going to be, what it was going to sound like. We experimented with so many different things. I was instantly really proud. I felt really good about this record but it wasn’t until we got on stage and you’re playing the songs in between our catalogue that I really felt that. It was really noticeable from the first day on this tour - we felt like a different band. There's a new energy to it. There was something that I could hear live that I couldn't hear before. 
You also revisited a lot of older tracks and b-sides on this tour, including many from the ‘Folie à Deux’-era. What prompted those choices? 
PETE: There were some lean years where there weren't a lot of rock bands being played on pop radio or playing award shows so we tried to play the biggest songs, the biggest versions of them. We tried to make our thing really airtight, bulletproof so that when we played next to whoever the top artist was, people were like, ‘oh yeah, they should be here.’ The culture shift in the world is so interesting because now, maybe rather than going wider, it makes more sense to go deeper with people. We thought about that in the way that we listen to music and the way we watch films. Playing a song that is a b-side or barely made a record but is someone’s favourite song makes a lot of sense in this era.
PATRICK: I think there also was a period there where, to Pete’s point, it was a weird time to be a rock band. We had this very strange thing that happened to us, and not a lot of our friends for some reason, where we had a bunch of hits, right? And it didn’t make any sense to me. It still doesn’t make sense to me. But there was a kind of novelty, where we could play a whole set of songs that a lot of people know. It was fun and rewarding for us to do that. But then you run the risk of playing the same set forever. I want to love the songs that we play. I want to care about it and put passion into what we do. And there’s no sustainable way to just do the same thing every night and not get jaded. We weren’t getting there but I really wanted to make sure that we don’t ever get there. 
PETE: In the origin of Fall Out Boy, what happened at our concerts was we knew how to play five songs really fast and jumped off walls and the fire marshal would shut it down. It was what made the show memorable, but we wanted to be able to last and so we tried to perfect our show and the songs and the stage show and make it flawless. Then you don’t really know how much spontaneity you want to include, because something could go wrong. When we started this tour, and we did a couple of spontaneous things, it opened us up to more. Because things did go wrong and that’s what made the show special. We’re doing what is the most punk rock version of what we could be doing right now. 
You seem generally a lot more comfortable celebrating your past success at this point in your career. 
PETE: I think it’s actually not a change from our past. I love those records, but I never want to treat them in a cynical way. I never want there to be a wink and a smile where we’re just doing this because it’s the anniversary. This was us celebrating these random songs and we hope people celebrate them with us. There was a purity to it that felt in line with how we’ve always felt about it. I love ‘Folie à Deux’ - out of any Fall Out Boy record that's probably the one I would listen to. But I just never wanted it to be done in a cynical way, where we feel like we have to. But celebrating it in a way where there’s the purity of how we felt when we wrote the song originally. I think that’s fucking awesome. 
PATRICK: Music is a weird art form. Because when you’re an actor and you play a character, that is a specific thing. James Bond always wears a suit and has a gun and is a secret agent. If you change one thing, that’s fine, but you can’t really change all of it. But bands are just people. You are yourself. People get attached to it like it’s a story but it’s not. That was always something I found difficult. For the story, it’s always good to say, ‘it’s the 20th anniversary, let’s go do the 20th anniversary tour’, that’s a good story thing. But it’s not always honest. We never stopped playing a lot of the songs from ‘Take This To Your Grave’, right? So why would I need to do a 20-year anniversary and perform all the songs back to back? The only reason would be because it would probably sell a lot of tickets and I don’t really ever want to be motivated by that, frankly. 
One of the things that’s been amazing is that now as the band has been around for a while, we have different layers of audience. I love ‘Folie à Deux’, I do, I love that record. But I had a really personally negative experience of touring on it. So that’s what I think of when I think of that record initially. It had to be brought back to me for me to appreciate it, for me to go, ‘oh, this record is really great. I should be happy with this. I should want to play this,’ So that’s why we got into a lot of the b-sides because we realised that our perspectives on a lot of these songs were based in our feelings and experiences from when we were making them. But you can find new experiences if you play those songs. You can make new memories with them. 
You alluded there to the 20th anniversary of ‘Take This To Your Grave’. Obviously you have changed and developed as a band hugely since then. But is there anything you can point to about making that debut record that has remained a part of your process since then? 
PETE: We have a language, the band, and it’s definitely a language of cinema and film. That’s maintained through time. We had very disparate music tastes and influences but I think film was a place we really aligned. You could have a deep discussion, because none of us were filmmakers. You could say which part was good and which part sucked and not hurt anybody’s feelings, because you weren’t going out to make a film the next day. Whereas with music, I think if we’d only had that to talk about, we would have turned out a different band.  
PATRICK: ‘Take This To Your Grave’, even though it’s absolutely our first record, there’s an element of it that’s still a work in progress. It is still a band figuring itself out. Andy wasn’t even officially in the band for half of the recording, right? I wasn’t even officially the guitar player for half of the recording. We were still bumbling through it. There was something that popped up a couple times throughout the record where you got these little inklings of who the band really was. We really explored that on ‘From Under the Cork Tree’’. So when we talk about what has remained the same… I didn’t want to be a singer, I didn’t know anything about singing, I wasn’t playing on that. I didn’t even plan to really be in this band for that long because Pete had a real band that really toured so I thought this was gonna be a side project. So there’s always been this element within the band where I don’t put too many expectations on things and then Pete has this really big ambition, creatively. There’s this great interplay between the tour of us where I’m kind of oblivious, and I don’t know when I’m putting out a big idea and Pete has this amazing vision to find what goes where. There’s something really magical about that because I never could have done a band like this without it. We needed everybody, we needed all four of us. And I think that’s the thing that hasn’t changed - the four of us just being ourselves and trying to figure things out. Listening back to ‘Folie’ or ‘Infinity On High’ or ‘American Beauty’. I’m always amazed at how much better they are than I remember. I listened to ‘MANIA’ the other day. I have a lot of misgivings about that record, a lot of things I’m frustrated about. But then I’m listening to it and I’m like, ‘this is pretty good.’ There’s a lot of good things in there. I don’t know why, it’s kind of like you can’t see those things. It’s kind of amazing to have Pete be able to see those things. And likewise, sometimes Pete has no idea when he writes something brilliant, as a lyricist, and I have to go, ‘No, I’m gonna keep that one, I’m gonna use that.’ 
On ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ you teamed up with producer Neal Avron again for the first time since 2008. Given how much time has passed, did it take a minute to reestablish that connection or did you pick up where you left off? 
PATRICK: It really didn’t feel like any time had passed between us and Neal. It was pretty seamless in terms of working with him. But then there was also the weird aspect where the last time we worked with him was kind of contentious. Interpersonally, the four of us were kind of fighting with each other…as much as we do anyway. We say that and then that myth gets built bigger than it was. We were always pretty cool with each other. It’s just that the least cool was making ‘Folie’. So then getting into it again for this record, it was like no time had passed as people but the four of us got on better so we had more to bring to Neal. 
PETE: It’s a little bit like when you return to your parents’ house for the holiday break when you’re in college. It’s the same house but now I can drink with my parents. We’d grown up and the first times we worked with Neal, he had to do so much more boy scout leadership, ‘you guys are all gonna be okay, we’re gonna do this activity to earn this badge so you guys don’t fucking murder each other.’ This time, we probably got a different version of Neal that was even more creative, because he had to do less psychotherapy. 
He went deep too. Sometimes when you’re in a session with somebody, and they’re like, ‘what are we singing about?’, I’ll just be like, ‘stuff’. He was not cool with ‘stuff’. I would get up and go into the bathroom outside the studio and look in the mirror, and think ‘what is it about? How deep are we gonna go?’ That’s a little bit scarier to ask yourself. If last time Neal was like a boy scout leader, this time, it was more like a Sherpa. He was helping us get to the summit. 
The title track of the album also finds you in a very reflective mood, even bringing back lyrics from ‘Love From the Other Side’. How would you describe the meaning behind that title and the song itself?
PETE: The record title has a couple of different meanings, I guess. The biggest one to me is that we basically all are former stars. That’s what we’re made of, those pieces of carbon. It still feels like the world’s gonna blow and it’s all moving too fast and the wrong things are moving too slow. That track in particular looks back at where you sometimes wish things had gone differently. But this is more from the perspective of when you’re watching a space movie, and they’re too far away and they can’t quite make it back. It doesn’t matter what they do and at some point, the astronaut accepts that. But they’re close enough that you can see the look on their face. I feel like there’s moments like that in the title track. I wish some things were different. But, as an adult going through this, you are too far away from the tether, and you’re just floating into space. It is sad and lonely but in some ways, it’s kind of freeing, because there’s other aspects of our world and my life that I love and I want to keep shaping and changing. 
Patrick: I’ll open up Pete’s lyrics and I just start hearing things. It almost feels effortless in a lot of ways. I just read his lyrics and something starts happening in my head. The first line, ‘I’m in a winter mood, dreaming of spring now’, instantly the piano started to form to me. That was a song that I came close to not sending the band. When I make demos, I’ll usually wait until I have five or six to send to everybody. I didn’t know if anyone was gonna like this. It’s too moody or it’s not very us. But it was pretty unanimous. Everybody liked that one. I knew this had to end the record. It took on a different life in the context of the whole album. Then on the bridge section, I knew it was going to be the lyrics from “Love From The Other Side’. It’s got to come back here. It’s the bookends, but I also love lyrically what it does, you know, ‘in another life, you were my babe’, going back to that kind of regret, which feels different in  ‘Love From The Other Side’ than it does here. When the whole song came together, it was the statement of the record. 
Aside from the album, you have released a few more recent tracks that have opened you up to a whole new audience, most notably the collaboration with Taylor Swift on ‘Electric Touch’. 
PETE: Taylor is the only artist that I’ve met or interacted with in recent times who creates exactly the art of who she is, but does it one such a mass level. So that’s breathtaking to watch from the sidelines. The way fans traded friendship bracelets, I don’t know what the beginning of it was, but you felt that everywhere. We felt that, I saw that in the crowd on our tour. I don’t know Taylor well, but I think she’s doing exactly what she wants and creating exactly the art that she wants to create. And going that, on such a level, is really awe-inspiring to watch. It makes you want to make the biggest, weirdest version of our thing and put that out there. 
Then there was the cover of Billy Joel’s ‘We Didn’t Start The Fire’, which has had some big chart success for you. That must have taken you slightly by surprise. 
PATRICK: It’s pretty unexpected. Pete and I were going back and forth about songs we should cover and that was an idea that I had. This is so silly but there was a song a bunch of years ago I had kind of written called ‘Dark Horse’ and then there was a Katy Perry song called ‘Dark Horse’ and I was like, ‘damn it’, you know, I missed the boat on that one. So I thought if we don’t do this cover, somebody else is gonna do it. Let’s just get in the studio and just do it. We spent way more time on those lyrics than you would think because we really wanted to get a specific feel. It was really fun and kind of loose, we just came together in Neal’s house and recorded it in a day. 
PETE: There's irreverence to it. I thought the coolest thing was when Billy Joel got asked about it, and he was like, ‘I’m not updating it, that’s fine, go for it.’  I hope if somebody ever chose to update one of ours, we’d be like that. Let them do their thing, they’ll have that version. I thought that was so fucking cool. 
It’s almost no secret that the sound you became most known for in the md-2000s is having something of a commercial revival right now But what is interesting is seeing how bands are building on that sound and changing it. 
PATRICK: I love when anybody does anything that feels honest to them. Touring with Bring Me The Horizon, it was really cool seeing what’s natural to them. It makes sense. We changed our sound over time but we were always going to do that. It wasn’t a premeditated thing but for the four of us, it would have been impossible to maintain making the same kind of music forever. Whereas you’ll play with some other bands and they live that one sound. You meet up with them for dinner or something and they’re wearing the shirt of the band that sounds just like their band. You go to their house and they’re playing other bands that sound like them because they live in that thing. Whereas with the four of us and bands like Bring Me The Horizon, we change our sounds over time.  And there’s nothing wrong with either. The only thing that’s wrong is if it’s unnatural to you. If you’re AC/DC and all of a sudden power ballads are in and you’re like, ‘Okay, we’ve got to do a power ballad’, that’s when it sucks. But if you’re a thrash metal guy who also likes Celine Dion then yeah, do a power ballad. Emo as a word doesn’t mean anything anymore. But if people want to call it that, if the emo thing is back or having another life again, if that’s what’s natural to an artist, I think the world needs more earnest art. If that’s who you are, then do it. 
PETE: It would be super egotistical to think that the wave that started with us and My Chemical Romance and Panic! At The Disco has just been circling and cycling back. I remember seeing Nikki Sixx at the airport and he was like, ‘Oh you’re doing a flaming bass? Mine came from a backpack.’ It keeps coming back but it looks different. Talking to Lil Uzi Vert and Juice WRLD when he was around, it’s so interesting, because it’s so much bigger than just emo or whatever. It’s this whole big pop music thing that’s spinning and churning, and then it moves on, and then it comes back with different aspects and some of the other stuff combined. When you’re a fan of music and art and film, you take different stuff, you add different ingredients, because that’s your taste. Seeing the bands that are up and coming to me, it’s so exciting, because the rules are just different, right? It’s really cool to see artists that lean into the weirdness and lean into a left turn when everyone’s telling you to make a right. That’s so refreshing. 
PATRICK: It’s really important as an artist gets older to not put too much stock in your own influence. The moment right now that we’re in is bigger than emo and bigger than whatever was happening in 2005. There’s a great line in ‘Downton Abbey’ where someone was asking the Lord about owning this manor and he’s like ‘well, you don’t really own it, there have been hundreds of owners and you are the custodian of it for a brief time.’ That’s what pop music is like. You just have the ball for a minute and you’re gonna pass it on to somebody else. 
We will soon see you in the UK for your arena tour. How do you reflect on your relationship with the fans over here? 
PETE: I remember the first time we went to the UK, I wasn’t prepared for how culturally different it was. When we played Reading & Leeds and the summer festivals, it was so different, and so much deeper within the culture. It was a little bit of a shock. The first couple of times we played, I was like, ‘Oh, my God, are we gonna die?’ because the crowd was so crazy, and there was bottles. Then when we came back, we thought maybe this is a beast to be tamed. Finally, you realise it’s a trading of energy. That made the last couple of festivals we played so fucking awesome. When you realise that the fans over there are real fans of music It’s really awesome and pretty beautiful. 
PATRICK: We’ve played the UK now more than a lot of regions of the states. Pretty early on, I just clicked with it. There were differences, cultural things and things that you didn’t expect. But it never felt that different or foreign to me, just a different flavour…
PETE: This is why me and Patrick work so well together (laughs). 
PATRICK: Well, listen; I’m a rainy weather guy. There is just things that I get there. I don’t really drink anymore all that much. But I totally will have a beer in the UL, there’s something different about every aspect of it, about the ordering of it, about the flavour of it, everything, it’s like a different vibe. The UK audience seemed to click with us too. There have been plenty of times where we felt almost like a UK band than an American one. There have been years where you go there and almost get a more familial reaction than you would at home. 
Rock Sound has always been a part of that for us. It was one of the first magazines to care about us and the first magazine to do real interviews. That’s the thing, you would do all these interviews and a lot of them would be like ‘so where did the band’s name come from?’ But Rock Sound took us seriously as artists, maybe before some of us did. That actually made us think about who we are and that was a really cool experience. I think in a lot of ways, we wouldn’t be the band we are without the UK, because I think it taught us a lot about what it is to be yourself. 
Fall Out Boy’s ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ is out now via Fueled By Ramen
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fandomfuntimem · 6 months ago
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Remember when I promised all my one shots would come with art? I lied. ANOTHER DOAI X RE CROSSOVER BE UPON THEE!
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The folie of deux au x resident evil
Leon dove below a desk. Holding his breath he heard the sound of heavy boots slowly approaching the door. The door creaked open.
"Leon?" It said, "helloooo..." it began to wonder around the room. There would be footsteps, then they would stop, things would be shuffled around, then it would continue searching. This thing wearing Alex's skin just appeared and began stalking him! Like that freakish super soldier from the police station. It knew his name, but that wasn't his cousin. No. It was some freakish mind controling parasite or something!
Leon heard it stop again. The sound of a book being slid from a shelf was heard before the brief flipping of pages.
"Huh..."
"No. Nothings wrong. I just find books inturesting."
"Yeah... so. It seems he isn't in here."
"I know, but maybe you saw wrong!"
"Ugh! I don't even know what you like about the guy. I get he's your cousin and all, but he carries those gun things and keeps running."
"You're right. We aren't exactly what you used to be."
"Yeah... sorry..."
A one sided conversation, and it sounded regretful. Leon felt his shoulders relax, "your cousin" it said. Was it talking to Alex? Is Alex still in there? Leon shook himself. Maybe they were still there, but they have no control. He can't risk his life. Even if there was a sliver of a chance at saving them, he couldn't risk it.
The footsteps started again, moving away from his hiding spot. Soon the door creeked open, and the creature exited with the door slamming behind it. Leon listened as the footsteps slowley, but surely, became quieter and quieter. He let out a sigh of relief. Slowly creeping out of his hiding spot, he made his way to the door. Leon pressed his ear to the door, nothing, its safe.
~
Leon slowly made his way through the halls of the old office building. He hasn't found whatever Lankmann wanted him to find, but whatever it was can't be this hard to find. "It will revolutionize my research," he had said, "A matter of combining the two most optimal forms." Leon didn't believe it. Its probably going to result in a zombie apocalypse he'll have to clean up again...
He searched through some cabinets and desks. It would have really helped if they told him what he was looking for. Turning to leave he was only met with the tall lanky figure of what used to be his cousin. It basicly towered over him despite slouching. Black sludge dripped down half it's face, a glowing blue eye peaked through the curtain of slime. Clawed hands hung at it's sides, and the rest of their figure was shrouded in a black trench cout.
It smiled, "there you are!"
Leon tried to run, he really did, but it gripped his arm. A monstrously strong grip. He wanted to scream, yell for help, cry, but he couldn't. There was no one who would answer. The creature pulled him in, he struggled to no avail, and it just hugged him. A kind and firm hug. One that Leon hadn't felt in a long time.
Despite all his instincts telling him not to, Leon melted into the hug. He must be touch starved to take even the smallest form od affection from the mutated form of what used to be his best friend. "I missed you." It said.
"What?" Leon stepped back. The glowing eye was gone, instead he was faced with Alex's normal green eye on the right side of their face.
"I missed you. It's been years!"
"You were able to talk this entire time and you never did!?"
Alex laughed, "sorry sorry! Winfrey likes her freedom! It was pretty spooky though, wasn't it?"
"Yeah... it was."
"Ugh, yeah. Sooooo..."
"So?"
"Wanna grab something to eat and catch up? I know a place willing to make our burgers raw!"
Leon took note of the sharp teeth, carnivorous. Leon has seen weirder,
----------------------
My list of potention crossovers is extensive. I am also on a 9hr road trip rn and the most well behaved person is my 1yo niece. She's just straight vibin.
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soulsdontbreaktheybeeend · 2 months ago
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Free and yet so trapped. Part 2
Summary: this takes place some time after the end of folie a deux. If you're wondering how that is possible... stay tuned and find out. :)
It's Arthur Fleck x y/n, or is it Joker x y/n? Hm. :)
Part 1 <-
words: 1,506
But you had. You had already turned the next corner. There was no trace of anyone. Nevertheless, this fact made him feel a little relieved. He had left his place of refuge simply out of curiosity, without thinking about who might see him there.
His heart began to beat faster. Alone in a hiding place, in safety, yes, that was all right. But alone on the streets of Gotham. That was a different matter. It took him back to a time when he was safe from nothing and no one. And the red suit and make-up made no differences in these moments of being on his own for the most parts.
With observant eyes and ears, he walked briskly down the street to the next corner.
Click clack click clack click clack.
______________
You had your arms wrapped around yourself again. But this time not to shield you from the cold autumn wind. You felt warm enough from all the commotion. It was to keep your anger at bay. To contain it.
You found yourself walking faster. You longed for your home and the peacefulness and comfort it gave you. Your lips tense, pressed together. Which made your labored breathing more restricted. Your chest and shoulders heaved up and down. Nostrils fluttered, overwhelmed with the effort.
Just as you were about to cross the road, a car rounded the corner, preventing you from carrying on. Annoyed, you stopped. Arms still crossed. The car was driving so strangely slowly. "Oh my god, the gas pedal is the one on the right!" Cried the unnerved voice in your head, your knees shaking in agitation.
Almost home, you fumbled in your handbag for your keys. You didn't reach them straight away, your patience at its limit. You hung the bag on your right elbow, reached for the handle with your left hand to open it and finally you found with your eyes what your hands couldn't find on their own. Joy and misfortune at the same moment. Keys in your grasp, you stepped into the puddle of that one bloody pothole in the ground that has been there for years. For the first time ever.
___________
Arthur had hid behind the corner, while your mishap was happening to you. He struggled. Tried to talk himself into walking over to you. But what would he even say. His body eager to start walking, his mind stopping him from doing so. He looked down on him, touching his red suit jacket. Touching his painted face. His fingers touched his cheek, he brushes his lips. Make-up transferred to the tips of his fingers.
No.
You’d probably start to scream for help.
He’s the Joker.
So everyone assumes.
And then he got company. Or rather, you did?
____________
With your keys in your hand, you exhaled in exasperation, let your head fall back in your neck and questioned the universe as to what this is all about today. Wishing upon a shooting star, to wish for a version of yourself which would be less highly sensitive. No chance of seeing any stars at all in night sky. Which you then again felt grateful for, otherwise you’d lose and important part of who you are.
“Okay wow, it can't really get any worse now. At least I made it home safely.”
You had just turned the key in the lock when you felt a touch of a hand on your shoulder.
Your left hand immediately shot up in defense, as you turned around. Before you could properly focus on his face in the heat of the moment, all you could catch a glimpse of was a beige trench coat. You remembered it from earlier. He had put the trench coat on right after he got out of the cab. “y/n, sorry. It’s me.”, the culprit apologized.
“What the fuck, Jonathan!” Your face alone could have easily told him that as well. “You could’ve just said something instead of cree-”
Hold on a second. He doesn’t know where I live.
“Did you follow me here?” Your head turned slightly, eyes switching from shock to anger and lack of understanding.
___________
Arthur still hid behind the corner, had gulped at the moment you had confronted Jonathan about following you. In the end he had done so, too.
____________
“Yes, it’s no big deal, come on.”
Um..
You couldn't even process his words before he continued, “you.. you know, you left quite the impression on me earlier.” Wearing a grin on his face that let you in wonder of where he would go with this.
“So feisty.” His grin widened, “I wish I knew sooner this part of you existed.”
Your face froze and disgust was written all over it. Still, your energy was completely spent for today and you didn't feel like facing any more crap.
With the non existing rest of your strength and a calm voice, you pointed out, “look…”, you took a deep breath, “I'm not going to play your game. No matter what you think would happen to the two of us now in your wishful thinking. It's not going to happen. I'm tired, I’m exhausted and I just want to go to bed. All I can do for you is not to overestimate this situation here and forget about it. For both our sakes, Jonathan. Good night.” You turned your back on him to finally go inside.
You felt his body against your back. One of his hands reached around your waist to your hand on the key to stop you. On that move, your forehead bumped slightly against the door.
“GET OFF ME!” You fought. He attempted to say something but then you heard a second male voice.
__________
Arthur was suspicious from the start and had the feeling that this wasn't going to end well. He was impressed by the calmness with which you tried to get the situation under control. But when that didn't work, he couldn't stand to just watch it any longer. He had to take action.
He’s the Joker after all. So everyone assumes.
__________
“Tsk tsk…”, Jonathans grip on you loosened slightly at the sound. “Now that is no way to treat a woman, is it, Johnathan?” He let go of you with a jolt. You on the other hand weren't ready to move yet, just turned your head a little. Just so little that you could see red out of the corner of your eye.
Jonathan laughed, “oh look who’s here! We were just talking about you earlier. About what a joke you are!”
In disbelief, you slowly turned around to face your… what? Savior?
The so-called joke grinned mischievously as he looked Jonathan straight in the eye. His stare slowly shifted from him to his own right waist, where his hand held a pistol from under his red suit jacket.
Just letting him see the gun was enough. He was already off and running. From a safer distance, he shouted back, "you're crazy! You fucking psycho!”
You just stood there. Arms crossed again, for yet another reason tonight. It was beginning to feel like this night would never come to an end.
He had tucked his pistol back in his pocket. You took a very quick glance at him and looked away again in a heartbeat towards the direction Jonathan had run off in. The situation felt extremely awkward. What the hell was going on that night and why the hell did you feel like your heart beat faster. Stronger. You covered it with your right hand. Afraid that your altered heartbeat might be visible to the naked eye.
You began to realize what just had happened. The events of the night replayed in your head. You couldn’t help but… giggle. One hand covered half your face out of bashfulness.
You finally found the courage to look at him, “you know, it’s funny. About half an hour ago, I was speaking up for you and now… now you…” You couldn’t help but giggle more, “now you kind of really saved me, from whatever could have happened.” You shook your head in disbelief. In disbelief of what had happened, but also a little bit of how smitten you were by him, just standing there. You searched for his eyes to really convey how grateful you were and thanked him.
He had his left hand placed casually in the pocket of his pants, before he raked it through his hair. What looked like self-confidence was actually more out of nervousness. He felt anxious. Torn between keeping on a mask or… not.
“I’m Arthur.” He held out his right hand to you with eager eyes to learn your name.
Your gaze immediately turned to his hand. After a brief moment of hesitation, you felt your palm meet his. It felt like half an eternity before you remembered that it was your turn to mention your name. Your gaze turned upwards from your connected hands to his face. Your eyes met and so did your souls.
____________
Part 3
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shieldofiron · 8 months ago
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Okay, so, following on from my ask yesterday, and after reading the wonderful, perfect fic you wrote, I was just wondering...
What if Billy mentioned to his good friend Eddie that he'd hired an escort to play out a fantasy about his high school crush and that he could give him the number of the place he used if Eddie was keen to revisit his fantasy about a certain blonde boy he knew in high school.
Of course Billy knows about Jason from talking to Steve and somehow (totally unexpectedly on purpose) Jason is the one that gets hired for the special job.
What then?
(see what you're doing to me? now i'm thinking munver stuff!)
This is a sequel to my Sex Worker Steve fic, you can read it on tumblr here and ao3 here for the full Boyfriend Experience. Sorry it was so late Guin, but I added this fic to ao3 too, here.
Folie à Deux
Eddie had never done this before.
Well.
That wasn't true.
He'd kind of paid a guy his first time, but he'd been too chickenshit to go through with it. Like it wasn't bad enough he was gay, he also believed in true love, believed in the moon and all the stars.
And so he'd moved to California. Found his moon and all the stars. Got dumped. Found him again. Got dumped again.
He'd run into Billy again, and it was like nothing had changed. Billy had a bit, he was a bit bigger, a bit softer. He'd been a pencil pusher then, working for a company that made home computers. Even hooked up Eddie with one, though all Eddie did was play games.
"Games..." Billy scoffed, "It can do so much more than games."
"I know. But games are why people will buy it," Eddie shrugged.
"Huh. Is that right?"
Now, Eddie didn't need to work at a diner any more. They'd sold their first game a year later to rave reviews, a fantasy action adventure game. Eddie'd written the story, and Billy had coded it. They'd made several more, and now he could buy that diner if he wanted, maybe ten times over.
And so this was his celebration. Or at least that's what Billy was calling it.
Billy, who was now suddenly all secretive, blowing off late night coding sessions.
"I got something off my mind," He grinned at Eddie over coffee in their office, "And I feel about 18 again."
"Yeah, what was on your mind?"
"High school crushes," Billy's grin widened. "You ever think about high school crushes?"
"Sure, I guess," Eddie shrugged.
"You ever think about Carver? What he's up to?" Billy's voice had that teasing lilt to it. Once upon a time Eddie had thought Billy was his moon and all his stars but they were too good as friends. Even when Billy was being an annoying ass.
Eddie rubbed his chin, "Sure. He's probably got a couple a kids now."
"So you have," Billy's eyes lit up even more. God, he was exhausting. "Thought about him."
Eddie shrugged, "Yeah, here or there."
"I gotta tell you, Eds, I did something kind of crazy last weekend, but I'm like... I feel so great."
Eddie frowned, "Was it cocaine? Cuz you're starting to freak me out, man."
"No. I kinda..." He laughed, "I hired an escort."
"What?"
"To pretend to be Harrington."
Eddie furrowed his brow, "You can do that?"
"Shit, yeah you can. You call and tell them what you're looking for. He even dressed up."
Eddie really wished he'd called Billy, because this conversation would be so much easier to have over the phone. A mix of humiliation, fascination, and reluctant lust washed over him like steam from a scalding cauldron.
"You can tell them... anything you want," Billy grinned, "Like... a school play."
Eddie exhaled shakily, "So that's what has you in this weird mood?"
"Kinda," Billy shrugged, "You want the number of the agency?"
Eddie swore he can hear himself begin to sweat.
"Because it got me thinking about what you said the other day," Billy picked up a donut and waved it in the air, "About how you wished you had the same creative energy you had in high school when you wrote like five thousand words a day or whatever you said."
"Eight..." Eddie croaked.
"Eight thousand a day," Billy raised one brow, "You owe me the final levels of Maze Crawler."
"I'm working on it," Eddie turned away, "And I didn't get laid in high school. That's how I was able to write eight thousand words a day."
Billy smacked his lips, "I'm just saying. It might change your life."
Eddie didn't say anything, but there was a post it stuck to his desk at the end of the day that said, "Ask for Angel."
And it wasn't like Eddie had to tell Billy that he got lonely a few nights later and called. This could be just for him.
"Hiya!" The girl on the other end smacked her gum.
"I'm looking for uh... Angel."
"Speaking," He could hear her grin through the phone. "What can we help you with?"
"Um... I..."
"Girl or guy, honey?" She asked pertly.
"G-guy."
"Okay," She giggled, "You got any preferences?"
"Um... yeah, I'm looking for a blonde. Kind of... maybe... like a jock type?"
She hummed.
"And I... my friend said you all take special requests?"
"Sure do," She chirped.
"Do you have a fax machine?" He asked.
"A fax....? Obviously not. But I got just the guy for you. Jackson will fix you right up," She snapped her gum, "Now you just tell me what you want, and go slow, I just painted my nails, I can't write so fast."
And so that's how Eddie found himself sitting on the edge of a hotel bed, rubbing sweaty hands against his jeans.
Jackson, apparently, was running late but he'd left a message at the front desk for his "brother" which is what they were apparently.
His stomach fluttered uncomfortably when he heard the key in the lock. He wasn't sure if he should sit or stand. He'd worked over the evening in his head like a million times, and still he hadn't thought of this moment.
And then the door opened, and everything drained out of his mind.
Blue eyes stared back at him, over a familiar sloped nose, the one that had always been so hard to draw. But Eddie had tried. Over and over.
"Hey babe," Jackson was supposed to say, but it came out in Jason Carver's voice, "You didn't have to wait up."
Eddie fumbled, embarrassment and confusion and lust and humiliation sucking him down like a tidal wave, "Ja-"
Jason shut the door, his eyelashes fluttering as he tossed a bag on the ground, and walking in, sure and steady, "You miss me?"
Eddie blinked, trying to remember his own script. But his head was blanking out.
Carver's face flashed panicked, and then smoothed out, "A gift? For me?"
This was when he was supposed to present the cash, lay it down on the dresser across from the bed, all smooth. He'd wanted to give it early, so 'Jackson' could relax. He hoped that this wasn't a hard night for him. That is he hoped, Eddie hoped, that he wasn't so ugly that the guy would have to grin and bear it too much.
But all of his confidence drained out of him, and he just shakily laid the envelope on the table, wincing.
"Thank you, babe," Carver said softly, just looking at it a moment before he shook his head, "Come. Get into bed with me, and tell me about your day."
Eddie feels so raw, so ripped open hearing that. Like Jason just burned off a layer of flesh and he could see deep inside Eddie, where all the rot lay just under the surface.
Because the script that seemed so clever in his mind with a stranger, the practice, the comfort of it... it was too much in the hands of the real person. Too powerful, vulnerable, obvious.
"You can cut the lines," He whispered.
A little steel shows under Jason's soft gaze. "Get in bed. Babe."
The last time they saw each other was at graduation. It was subdued, two of their own had died under the most suspicious of circumstances. But Max Mayfield was in the back of the crowd waving her cast in the air when Eddie crossed the stage, and that was because of Jason.
Jason who'd come to confront him, and ended up getting confronted by a newly undead Billy Hargrove and a panicked Lucas Sinclair. It had been Jason's idea to sing to her, and he was the reason Max was still alive.
Eddie moved towards the bed cautiously, his mind awash in the past and the present. He recalls so vividly Jason’s face that night, when they regrouped after the final battle and he’d come out of the house looking at Lucas and Max with such sadness but also such hope.
He always, just, believed in things. Eddie had lived forever on shifting sands, parents that wouldn’t show, promises that had been broken. He wanted to believe in things. And he had believed that Jason was back in Hawkins, happily married to a woman.
“How are you here, right now? Do you need money? Like for school or something?” Eddie asked.
Jason’s face flashed with annoyance, “Uh, yeah. Sure. I need money for school.”
“Because we don’t have to do this, ok?” Eddie cringed.
“You know, for someone who wrote a whole script for me about being your boyfriend, you sure are fickle,” Jason crossed his arms on the bed, “Not being a very good boyfriend.”
“We’ll, I’ve only ever… sort of done it before. So,” Eddie shrugged, “I was just imagining.”
“Sort of done it?” Jason frowned, shaking his head a little.
“My last boyfriend was married, so…” Eddie shrugged, “And the one before that… well, I called us boyfriends. He didn’t.”
Jason kicked off his sneakers, propping his little socked feet on the bed.
“I’ve never had a boyfriend either,” Jason said simply.
“How is that possible? You’re like… god, everyone’s wet dream,” Eddie muttered.
Jason looked more startled than flattered, even though he must have obviously known that from Eddie’s embarrassing script.
Jason frowned, “It’s hard to date. With my job.”
"Right."
Jason shrugged, "Now where were we?"
"Look, I really..." Eddie actually felt like he could cry, "Really don't wanna do this."
"Why? Just because you know the prostitute, suddenly you're too shy?" Jason said with a shrug, his face hard and unforgiving. "Look. It's fine. Though I kind of don't believe that all you want is this soft stuff."
"No because it's about you. So, obviously, I don't want to squirm in embarrassment all night." Eddie's voice shook. "Doubt I can even get it up."
"Me?" Jason snorts.
Eddie just shakes his head, "Look. It's fine. I know. You know."
Jason's eyes just flutter, and he looks down at his hand. "Oh. I'm Jason."
Eddie could only throw his hands in the air.
"I used to have this client, he wanted to call me by his exes name. So Jason's really common, I didn't..." Jason shrugs, "I didn't know. I thought I just... massively turned you off."
"You? Turn someone off?"
"It's been known to happen," Jason's lips twist into a smile.
Eddie's breath dries up in his lungs and he tries to say something, very unsuccessfully.
"So... Me huh?" Jason brushes a hand over his khakis. "After all this time."
Eddie's heart took another hit, but it's mired in confusion when Jason smoothly mounts his lap.
It confusing, arousing... it's awful to look up into those sky blue eyes. Like looking for the moon and all the stars on the brightest day of summer.
"Was this how you imagined it?" Jason whispered.
"No," Eddie admitted.
His clothes are quick work apparently. He feels almost paralyzed, even though he nods along with Jason's questions.
"Is this ok? Blowjob?"
He nods feverishly, yelping when Jason swallows him to the hilt in one go, his perfect pink lips resting against Eddie's pubic bone.
"Holy fucking shit," Eddie gasped.
Jason just hummed in response, swallowing around Eddie's cock.
He had his hand resting hesitantly on Jason's shoulder, his heart in his throat as Jason handily sucked all of his brains out through his dick. He's using his teeth just a little, and Eddie was gasping and panting like he was dying.
"Fuck... Jason... please... please..." He doesn't know what he's pleading for, he's lost the plot, and Jason's eyes glow neon. He has the thought that Jason's some kind of incubus, that he was stealing something from him.
Jason popped off with an obscene sound, "Can't stop."
Eddie coupld only moan in response, yanking Jason up and pulling him into a kiss before he can consider that he's crossing a line.
He slammed Jason into the bed and covers his mouth with Eddie's and... celestial bliss. Every bit as wonderful as the big bang, and just as terrible because it wasn't real.
Fireworks detonated up Eddie's spine, ten times as potent as the blowjob. He cradles Jason's face in his hands and pours all his heart into this.
Jason melts into him, throwing his arms around Eddie's shoulders and curling his hands into Eddie's hair. Pulling.
And then Eddie gets one single brain cell back and pulls back, panting, "Sorry. Is it ok? To kiss? Sorry. Sorry. FUCK! I'm sorry!"
Eddie turns away, sitting on the edge of the bed, with his stupid dick out. Jason doesn't move, still lying on the pillows.
"It wasn't like I imagined," Jason said softly.
"What?"
"I thought... one day you would see me on the street. Like... wow, how are you? How've you been?" Jason's voice was as soft as the whisper of sheets like... everything Eddie wanted but better. "And I'd ask you out. Or you would ask me out. And it would just be... nice."
"Me?" Eddie says softly, turning over his shoulder.
"You. After all this time," Jason had his eyes on the ceiling, but he there were tears dripping down his cheeks. "Not like this. Not..."
"Hey," Eddie reached out hesitantly, brushing their hands together. "It's okay."
"I'm not l-like Steve," Jason jerked his hand back, and Eddie doesn't even know what that means.
"Okay. Listen, Jason."
"I didn't want you to see me like this," Jason buried his face in his hands.
"Like what?"
"Like... this," Jason mumbled.
"Is something... I mean... Jason. Just look at me, can you?"
It took a moment, but Jason slowly drew his hands back, looking up at him with red rimmed blue eyes.
"I don't care that you do this for your job. Clearly, I would be the worst sort of hypocrite if I did," Eddie said. "And I don't understand why you keep talking about Steve? Do you mean Steve Harrington? But... Jason. Jason."
He wrote for a living for fuck's sake. So why couldn't he think of any word to say other than Jason's name. Reached out and cradled Jason's jaw, whispering his name to the space between them, whispering against Jason's lips.
"Jason," Eddie whispered, "How've you been? How are you?"
Jason looked raw when he pulled back, his normally cocky face open and vulnerable.
He swallowed, and Eddie could feel his throat move under Eddie's hand. They stayed like that a long moment, hands grasping each other's faces, just staring.
"Okay. I'm not sure I like my job though. But I love my roommate," Jason whispered. "Steve. He started dating this guy from school, you remember Billy Hargrove?"
Eddie chuckled, brushing their lips together, "That bastard. I should have known when he started talking about how I should call up this escort and do this... roleplay thing. They set us up."
Jason's breath shivered against Eddie's lips.
"Really?"
"Yeah. He knew I had..." Eddie swallowed. "The worst crush on you. The most... astronomical crush."
Jason curled his hands into Eddie's hair, "Keep saying things like that."
"This isn't... like... this... this isn't a part of it right? All of this?" Eddie said, terror striking his heart for a moment.
Jason snorted. "I kept on script better than you. I just... no this isn't a part of it. I'm good at the boyfriend experience, usually."
Eddie hummed. "I bet you are. Look at you, so perfect."
Jason shook his head. "Perfect. J-Jesus, no way."
"You said to keep saying it," Eddie shrugged. "I like you. Think you're perfect. Get the fuck over it, Carver."
A scowl that Eddie remembered all too well flashed across Jason's face, but Eddie kisses it away.
"So... this isn't a part of it. It's real... right?" Jason whispered, stroking Eddie's hair.
"It's real for me," Eddie whispered back. "We don't have to..."
"I'm all prepped. And I'm," Jason coughed. "On prep. Tested. I'm absolutely religious about testing."
Eddie smiled. "Religious, huh? I bet I can get you praying again."
Jason's smile was slower, like night falling over a bright blue sky.
"I bet you can. Eddie."
Eddie closed his eyes. It wasn't like he imagined, not at fucking all. But it was Jason, still. Eddie'd built the sun and moon and all the stars on much less than this.
It was a little awkward, fumbling with Jason's khakis and belt so he could finally get his hands all over his perfect body. It was a little older, pale stubble dusting his cheeks. Eddie nervously pulled his shirt down over his own small ponch, but Jason ignored him, tugging it over Eddie's head and smoothing his hair back into place, hands sure and steady.
"You're so stunning. Feel so... perfect," Eddie mumbled, stroking Jason a few times and watching the flush spread across his face.
"Want me to do anything-ahhh- special-don't stop," Jason squirmed.
"No, I want it just like this," Eddie pulled Jason's knees up, digging in his pocket for the condom and rolling it on.
"Missionary?" Jason frowned.
"Not like you imagined?"
Jason shook his head and Eddie leaned in, rubbing his cheek against Jason's ear, "Next time, I'll fuck you hard and rough. Slide you across the bed, push your face into the covers... and afterwards tell you you're perfect, show you just how much I've been thinking of you, just like this. But for now, Jason, Jason, let me see you. Wanna watch your eyes when I fuck you."
He was heaven to enter, eyes widening, nails clawing, knees trembling.
Eddie does lose his mind a bit there, squeezed into scalding heat, blue eyes like an incubus's stare. He fucks Jason up the bed until they slam into the headboard, until Jason's screaming, red faced, coming across his own belly with stuttering gasps.
And afterwards, big blue eyes trained on Eddie's face, so trusting, so soft and open.
He was everything, everything. Jason, the sun, the moon, all the stars, after all this time.
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softnsquishable · 1 year ago
Text
Thanks to this lovely post, I have been able to transcribe the entirety of the new Rock Sound magazine interview with Pete and Patrick. Find the entire transcript below the cut!
WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE
WITH THE TRIUMPHANT ‘SO MUCH (FOR) STARDUST’ CAPTURING A WHOLE NEW GENERATION OF FANS, FALL OUT BOY ARE RIDING HIGH. CELEBRATING THEIR PAST WHILE LOOKING TOWARDS A BRIGHT FUTURE. PETE WENTZ AND PATRICK STUMP REFLECT ON RECENT SUCCESSES AND THE LESSONS LEARNED FROM TWO DECADES OF WRITING AND PERFORMING TOGETHER. 
You have just completed a US summer tour that included stadium shows and some of your most ambitious production to date. What were your aims going into this particular show?
Pete: Playing stadiums is a funny thing. I pushed pretty hard to do a couple this time because I think that the record Patrick came up with musically lends itself to that feeling of being part of something larger than yourself. When we were designing the cover to the album, it was meant to be all tangible, which was a reaction to tokens and skins that you can buy and avatars. The title is made out of clay, and the painting is an actual painting. We wanted to approach the show in that way as well. We’ve been playing in front of a gigantic video wall for the past eight years. Now, we wanted a stage show where you could actually walk inside it.
Did adding the new songs from ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ into the setlist change the way you felt about them?
Patrick: One of the things that was interesting about the record was that we took a lot of time figuring out what it was going to be, what it was going to sound like. We experimented with so many different things. I was instantly really proud. I felt really good about this record but it wasn’t until we got on stage and you’re playing the songs in between our catalogue that I really felt that.It was really noticeable from the first day on this tour - we felt like a different band. There’s a new energy to it. There was something that I could hear live that I couldn’t hear before.
You also revisited a lot of older tracks and b-sides on this tour, including many from the ‘Folie à Deux’-era. What prompted those choices?
Pete: There were some lean years where there weren’t a lot of rock bands being played on pop radio or playing award shows so we tried to play the biggest songs, the biggest versions of them. We tried to make our thing really airtight, bulletproof so that when we played next to whoever the top artist was, people were like, ‘oh yeah, they should be here.’ The culture shift in the world is so interesting because now, maybe rather than going wider, it makes more sense to go deeper with people. We thought about that in the way that we listen to music and the way we watch films. Playing a song that is a b-side or barely made a record but is someone's favorite song makes a lot of sense in this era.
Patrick: I think there also was a period there where, to Pete’s point, it was a weird time to be a rock band. We had this very strange thing that happened to us, and not a lot of our friends for some reason, where we had a bunch of hits, right? And it didn’t make any sense to me. It still doesn’t make sense to me. But there was a kind of novelty, where we could play a whole set of songs that a lot of people know. It was fun and rewarding for us to do that. But then you run the risk of playing the same set forever. I want to love the songs that we play. I want to care about it and put passion into what we do.  And there’s no sustainable way to just do the same thing every night and not get jaded. We weren’t getting there but I really wanted to make sure that we don’t ever get there.
Pete: In the origin of Fall Out Boy, what happened at our concerts was we knew how to play five songs really fast and jumped off walls and the fire marshal would shut it down. It was what made the show memorable, but we wanted to be able to last and so we tried to perfect our show and the songs and the stage show and make it flawless. Then you don’t really know how much spontaneity you want to include, because something could go wrong. When we started this tour, and we did a couple of spontaneous things, it opened us up to more. Because things did go wrong and that’s what made the show special. We’re doing what is the most punk rock version of what we could be doing right now. 
You seem generally a lot more comfortable celebrating your past success at this point in your career.
Pete: I think it’s actually not a change from our past. I love those records, but I never want to treat them in a cynical way. I never want there to be a wink and a smile where we’re just doing this because it’s the anniversary. Thai was us celebrating these random songs and we hope people celebrate them with us. There was a purity to it that felt in line with how we always felt about it. I love ‘Folie à Deux’ - out of any Fall Out Boy record that’s probably the one I would listen to. But I just never want it to be done in a cynical way, where we feel like we have to. But celebrating it in a way where there’s the purity of how we felt when we wrote the song originally, I think that’s fucking awesome.
Patrick: Music is a weird art form. Because when you’re an actor and you play a character, that is a specific thing. James Bond always wears a suit and has a gun and is a secret agent. If you change one thing, that’s fine, but you can’t really change all of it. But bands are just people. You are yourself. People get attached to it like it’s a story but it’s not. That was always something that I found difficult. For the story, it’s always good to say, ‘it’s the 20th anniversary, let’s go do the 20th anniversary tour,’ that’s a good story thing. But it’s not always honest. We never stopped playing a lot of the songs from ‘Take This To Your Grave’, right? So why would I need to do a 20-year anniversary and perform all the songs back to back? The only reason would be because it would probably sell a lot of tickets and I don’t really ever want to be motivated by that, frankly. 
One of the things that’s been amazing is that now as the band has been around for a while, we have different layers of audience. I love ‘Folie à Deux’, I do, I love that record. But I had a really personally negative experience of touring on it. So that’s what I think of when I think of that record initially. It had to be brought back to me for me to appreciate it, for me to go, ‘oh, this record is really great. I should be happy with this. I should want to play this.’ So that’s why we got into a lot of the b-sides because we realized that our perspectives on a lot of these songs were based in our feelings and experiences from when we were making them. But you can find new experiences if you play those songs. You can make new memories with them. 
You alluded there to the 20th anniversary of ‘Take This To Your Grave’. Obviously you have changed and developed as a band hugely since then. But is there anything you can point to about making that debut record that has remained as a part of your process since then?
Pete: We have a language, the band, and it’s definitely a language of cinema and film. That’s maintained through time. We have very disparate musical tastes and influences but I think film was a place we really aligned. You could have a deep discussion, because none of us were filmmakers. You could say which part was good and which part sucked and not hurt anybody’s feelings, because you weren’t going out to make a film the next day. Whereas with music, I think if we’d only had that to talk about, we would have turned out a different band. 
Patrick: ‘Take This To Your Grave’, even though it’s absolutely our first record, there’s an element of it that’s still a work in progress. It is still a band figuring itself out. Andy wasn’t even officially in the band for half of the recording, right? I wasn’t even officially the guitar player for half of the recording. We were still bumbling through it. There was something that popped up a couple times throughout that record where you got these little inklings of who the band really was. We really explored that on ‘From Under The Cork Tree’. 
So when we talk about what has remained the same…I didn’t want to be a singer, I didn’t know anything about singing. I wasn’t planning on that. I didn’t even plan to really be in this band for that long because Pete had a real band that really toured so I thought this was gonna be a side project. So there’s always been this element within the band where I don’t put too many expectations on things and then Pete has this really big ambition, creatively. There’s this great interplay between the two of us where I’m kind of oblivious, and I don’t know when I’m putting out a big idea and Pete has this amazing vision to find what goes where. There’s something really magical about that because I never could have done a band like this without it. We needed everybody, we needed all four of us. And I think that’s the thing that hasn’t changed. - the four of us just being ourselves and trying to figure things out. Listening back to ‘Folie’ or ‘Infinity On High’ or ‘American Beauty’, I’m always amazed at how much better they are then I remember. I listened to ‘MANIA’ the other day. I have a lot of misgivings about that record, a lot of things that I’m frustrated about. But then I’m listening to it and I’m like, ‘this is pretty good.’ There’s a lot of good things in there. I don’t know why, it’s kind of like you can’t see those things. It’s kind of amazing to have Pete be able to see those things. And likewise, sometimes Pete has no idea when he writes something brilliant, as a lyricist, and I have to go, ‘No, I’m gonna keep that one, I’m gonna use that.’ 
On ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ you teamed up with producer Neal Avron again for the first time since 2008. Given how much time has passed, did it take a minute to reestablish that connection or did you pick up where you left off?
Patrick: It really didn’t feel like any time had passed between us and Neal. It was pretty seamless in terms of working with him. But then there was also that weird aspect where the last time we had worked with him was kind of contentious. Interpersonally, the four of us were kind of fighting with each other…as much as we do anyway. We say that and the myth gets built bigger than it was. We were always pretty cool with each other. It’s just that the least cool was making ‘Folie’. So then getting into it again for this record, it was like no time had passed as people but the four of us got on better so we had more to bring to Neal.
Pete: It’s a little bit like when you return to your parents’ house for a holiday break when you’re in college. It’s the same house but now I can drink with my parents. We’d grown up and the first times we worked with Neal, he had to do so much more boy scout leadership, ‘you guys are all gonna be okay, we’re gonna do this activity to earn this badge so you guys don’t fucking murder each other.’ This time, we probably got a different version of Neal that was even more creative, because he had to do less psychotherapy. 
He went deep too. Sometimes when you’re in a session with somebody, and they’re like, ‘what are we singing about?’, I’ll just be like, ‘stuff’. He was not cool with ‘stuff’. I would get up and go into the bathroom outside the studio and look in the mirror, and think ‘what is it about? How deep are we gonna go?’ That’s a little bit scarier to ask yourself. If last time Neal was like a boy scout leader, this time, it was more like a Sherpa. He was helping us get to the summit. 
The title track of the album also finds you in a very reflective mood, even bringing back lyrics from ‘Love From The Other Side’. How would you describe the meaning behind that title and the song itself?
Pete: The record title has a couple of different meanings, I guess. The biggest one to me is that we basically all are former stars. That’s what we’re made of, those pieces of carbon. It still feels like the world’s gonna blow and it’s all moving too fast and the wrong things are moving too slow. That track in particular looks back at where you sometimes wish things had gone differently. But this is more from the perspective of when you’re watching a space movie, and they’re too far away and they can’t quite make it back. It doesn’t matter what they do and at some point, the astronaut accepts that. But they’re close enough that you can see the look on their face. I feel like there’s moments like that in the title track. I wish some things were different. But, as an adult going through this, you are too far away from the tether, and you’re just floating into space. It is sad and lonely but in some ways, it’s kind of freeing, because there’s other aspects of our world and my life that I love and that I want to keep shaping and changing.
Patrick: I’ll open up Pete’s lyrics and I just start hearing things. It almost feels effortless in a lot of ways. I just read his lyrics and something starts happening in my head. The first line, ‘I’m in a winter mood, dreaming of spring now’, instantly the piano started to form to me. That was a song that I came close to not sending to the band. When I make demos, I’ll usually wait until I have five or six to send to everybody. I didn’t know if anyone was gonna like this. It’s too moody or it’s not very us. But it was pretty unanimous. Everybody liked that one. I knew this had to end the record. It took on a different life in the context of the whole album. Then on the bridge section, I knew it was going to be the lyrics from ‘Love For The Other Side’. It’s got to come back here. It’s the bookends, but I also love lyrically what it does, you know, ‘in another life, you were my babe’, going back to that kind of regret, which feels different in ‘Love For The Other Side’ than it does here. When the whole song came together, it was the statement of the record. 
Aside from the album, you have released a few more recent tracks that have opened you up to a whole new audience, most notably the collaboration with Taylor Swift on ‘Electric Touch’. 
Pete: Taylor is the only artist that I’ve met or interacted with in recent times who creates exactly the art of who she is, but does it on such a mass level. So that’s breathtaking to watch from the sidelines. The way fans traded friendship bracelets, I don’t know what the beginning of it was, but you felt that everywhere. We felt that, I saw that in the crowd on our tour. I don’t know Taylor well, but I think she’s doing exactly what she wants and creating exactly the art she wants to create. And doing that, on such a level, is really awe-inspiring to watch. It makes you want to make the biggest, weirdest version of our thing and put that out there. 
Then there was the cover of Billy Joel’s ‘We Didn’t Start The Fire’, which has had some big chart success for you. That must have taken you slightly by surprise.
Patrick: It’s pretty unexpected. Pete and I were going back and forth about songs we should cover and that was an idea that I had. This is so silly but there was a song a bunch of years ago I had kind of written called ‘Dark Horse' and then there was a Katy Perry song called ‘Dark Horse’ and I was like, ‘damn it’, you know, I missed the boat on that one. So I thought if we don’t do this cover, somebody else is gonna do it. Let’s just get in the studio and just do it. We spent way more time on those lyrics than you would think because we really wanted to get a specific feel. It was really fun and kind of loose, we just came together in Neal’s house and recorded it in a day.
Pete: There’s irreverence to it. I thought the coolest thing was when Billy Joel got asked about it, and he was like, ‘I’m not updating it, that’s fine, go for it.’ I hope if somebody ever chooses to update one of ours, we’d be like that. Let them do their thing, they'll have that version. I thought that was so fucking cool. 
It’s also no secret that the sound you became most known for in the mid-2000s is having something of a commercial revival right now. But what is interesting is seeing how bands are building on that sound and changing it. 
Patrick: I love when anybody does anything that feels honest to them. Touring with Bring Me The Horizon, it was really cool seeing what’s natural to them. It makes sense. We changed our sound over time but we were always going to do that. It wasn’t a premeditated thing but for the four of us, it would have been impossible to maintain making the same kind of music forever. Whereas you’ll play with some other hands and they live that one sound. You meet up with them for dinner or something and they’re wearing the shirt of the band that sounds just like their band. You go to their house and they’re playing other bands that sound like them because they live in that thing. Whereas with the four of us and bands like Bring Me The Horizon, we change our sounds over time. And there’s nothing wrong with that either. The only thing that’s wrong is if it’s unnatural to you. If you’re AC/DC and all of a sudden power ballads are in and you’re like, ‘Okay, we’ve got to do a power ballad’, that’s when it sucks. But if you’re a thrash metal guy who also likes Celine Dion then yeah, do a power ballad. Emo as a word doesn’t mean anything anymore. But if people want to call it that, if the emo thing is back or having another life again, if that’s what’s natural to an artist, I think the world needs more earnest art. If that’s who you are, then do it.
Pete: It would be super egotistical to think that the wave started with us and My Chemical Romance and Panic! At The Disco has just been circling and cycling back. I remember seeing Nikki Sixx at the airport and he was like, ‘Oh, you’re doing a flaming bass? Mine came from a backpack.’ It keeps coming back but it looks different. Talking to Lil Uzi Vert and Juice WRLD when he was around, it’s so interesting, because it’s so much bigger than just emo or whatever. It’s this whole big pop music thing that’s spinning and churning, and then it moves on., and then it comes back with different aspects and some of the other stuff combined. When you’re a fan of music and art and film, you take different stuff, you add different ingredients, because that’s your taste. Seeing the bands that are up and coming to me, it’s so exciting, because the rules are just different, right? It’s really cool to see artists that lean into the weirdness and lean into a left turn when everyone’s telling you to make a right. That’s so refreshing. 
Patrick: It’s really important as an artist gets older to not put too much stock in your own influence. The moment right now that we’re in is bigger than emo and bigger than whatever was happening in 2005. There’s a great line in ‘Downton Abbey’ where someone was asking the Lord about owning this manor and he’s like, ‘well, you don’t really own it, there have been hundreds of owners and you are the custodian of it for a brief time.’ That’s what pop music is like. You just have the ball for a minute and you’re gonna pass it on to somebody else.
We will soon see you in the UK for your arena tour. How do you reflect on your relationship with the fans over here?
Pete: I remember the first time we went to the UK, I wasn’t prepared for how culturally different it was. When we played Reading & Leeds and the summer festivals, it was so different, and so much deeper within the culture. It was a little bit of a shock. The first couple of times we played, I was like, ‘Oh my God, are we gonna die?” because the crowd was so crazy, and there was bottles. Then when we came back, we thought maybe this is a beast to be tamed. Finally, you realize it’s a trading of energy. That made the last couple of festivals we played so fucking awesome. When you really realize that the fans over there are real fans of music. It’s really awesome and pretty beautiful. 
Patrick: We’ve played the UK now more than a lot of regions of the states. Pretty early on, I just clicked with it. There were differences, cultural things and things that you didn’t expect. But it never felt that different or foreign to me, just a different flavor…
Pete: This is why me and Patrick work so well together (laughs).
Patrick: Well, listen; I’m a rainy weather guy. There is just things that I get there. I don’t really drink anymore all that much. But I totally will have a beer in the UK, there’s something different about every aspect of it, about the ordering of it, about the flavor of it, everything, it’s like a different vibe. The UK Audience seemed to click with us too. There have been plenty of times where we felt almost more like a UK band than an American one. There have been years where you go there and almost get a more familial reaction than you would at home. 
Rock Sound has always been a part of that for us. It was one of the first magazines to care about us and the first magazine to do real interviews. That’s the thing, you would do all these interviews and a lot of them would be like ‘so where did the band’s name come from?” But Rock Sound took us seriously as artists, maybe before some of us did. That actually made us think about who we are and that was a really cool experience. I think in a lot of ways, we wouldn’t be the band we are without the UK, because I think it taught us a lot about what it is to be yourself.
Fall Out Boy’s ‘So Much (For) Stardust’ is out now via Fueled By Ramen. 
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paracosmniac · 2 months ago
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I've just rewatched both the original Joker and Folie a Deux and it's disheartening how the original is denied all possible interpretations now. And I'm sure Todd did that on purpose. It's almost like he's offended that his vision of Arthur got twisted in a way he never expected and the sequel as a huge fuck you to the audience that turned his deranged character into a guy we all had sympathy for. It's almost like he feels ashamed that we found Arthur likeable and now whole heartedly denied him any chance to rise. It ain't nothing but a farce aimed to educate the slow witted. Folie a Deux revolves around the idea that Arthur is not a criminal mastermind, he ain't chaotic evil and never will be. He is still a full on loser, but with blood on his hands. Todd might have made us feel sympathy for the devil in the original Joker, but devil has to pay for his sins no matter how we feel for him.
There shouldn't have been an hour long debate whether it was Arthur or Joker who committed those crimes. He was to be found guilty no matter what arguments the defence provides. And it doesn't really matter who was behind those murders. I think Arthur knew too darn well that he couldn't live up to the standarts his followers set. He was prone to violence but never took pleasure in taking those lives. He made those crimes out of despair and hurt. And that's not what people expected to hear from him. So he didn't fit anywhere, was he wearing a Joker mask or was it him all along it didn't really matter. He was fucked either way.
I think the main reason why the audience was so pissed with Folie a Deux is Todds intention to turn a blind eye on the reasons why Arthur ended up being such a srew up. It turns out Pennys abuse followed by a serious head injury was not enough to find Arthur a mentally defective person. Everything that's happened in his childhood was not enough to play a psychiatric defence. The specialist that spent 90 minuts to give him a mental examination ruled out the possibility that his childhood trauma could lead into splitting his personalty in two. How offensive was that towards the audience? You really gonna condone such behavior and expect people to swallow it for the sake of bringing justice? Joker 2019 was built around the concept of a villian being born out of the system that failed him from the very beginning. So why do you let the society to get away with what they did? Who was responsible for this childs safety, who was there to listen to him when he struggled ? Why was he denied medication? All these questions matter before you start judging the character.
We were denied any credible examination of Arthurs mental state. Turning the courtroom into the show drama where people take pride and pleasure in humiliating the defendant. The stage setting for the character regression no one needed.
We left Arthur/Joker at the moment of liberation in the first film. That guy was done feeling sorry. Both for himself, and for the society. And that's perfectly fine for a fictional character. "Look what you've done, look where it lead to? - I know, isn't it beautiful?" Not everything should be edificatory. Sometimes you need the little guy to win. So let him be, let him live that fantasy. Boy does he deserve that. And so do we
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penny00dreadful · 7 months ago
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Folie à Deux - Complete
For @psychocatnerd
Rating: Explicit
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 AO3
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For the second time in recent memory, Eddie awoke in Steve’s bed with a body pressed up against him.
A body that was missing boobies, this time.
But while having a body wrapped up in his arms was good, great even, there was something about it that was less good and great.
And that was the hair in his mouth.
Curly hair sticking on his tongue and scratching at his nose. Long curly hair that Steve definitely didn’t have.
Opening his eyes, Eddie was met with the sight of a bird's nest of dark brown curly hair staring him in the face.
He took a moment to stare.
No fucking way.
With absolutely no grace and no forethought, he shot upwards, sitting bolt upright while his own body groaned and pouted below him.
Eddie had a short moment of complete delirium where he was all but convinced he was dead. Or astral projecting or something. He was staring down at his own body below him, his heart pounding away in his chest before his brain knocked the sleep fully out and he came back down to earth.
Metaphorically speaking.
Because he was very much alive and very much not astral projecting. Instead he was going through the slightly, only slightly more normal (at least to him) situation of being kicked out of his own body again and landing into the body of his… boyfriend?
Was Steve his boyfriend now?
Or did they have to go through the whole song and dance of, like, dates and coy hand-holding and shit before they made it official?
Like movies and picnics and shit?
Okay, maybe that wouldn’t be so bad.
“Stevie.” Eddie muttered, shaking Steve’s shoulder and nearly catching a flying hand to the face when Steve tried to bat him away.
“Steeeeevieee.” Eddie drew out, shaking him a little more insistently, just to be a shithead about it. 
“What?” Steve huffed, not opening his own eyes and almost melting back into the bed the second he’d gotten the word out.
“You wanna be my boyfriend?” Eddie asked and then tacked onto the end, “Oh, by the way, we’ve switched again.”
Steve frowned, slowly blinking and turned his head ever so slightly to look at Eddie. 
Eddie shot him what he hoped was Steve’s goofy little crooked grin and his dorky finger wave.
The downturned corners of Steve’s mouth and his flat unimpressed stare would have sent a weaker man scampering.
“Perfect. Just fucking perfect.” Steve grumbled as he heaved himself upwards, his hair, or rather Eddie’s hair, sticking up in all different directions, looking like he wanted to have a word with the universe's manager.
Eddie cooed at him, pinching his cheek and only grinned wider when Steve slapped his hand away lightly but still wrapping his fingers around Eddie’s hand and holding on tight. 
Eddie’s heart was rioting again but it wasn’t because of panic this time. 
“Is this what it’s going to be like forever now?” Steve sighed. “Switching bodies whenever we sleep?”
Eddie shrugged, brushing some of Steve’s hair behind his ear. “I don’t know, sweetheart.” Eddie gave him honesty, what else could he do? “But we’ll figure it out.”
Steve nodded, squeezing his fingers but stayed silent..
After a moment of quiet, Eddie spoke up because he had no impulse control and quiet was his enemy.
“So.” Eddie said, with an air of nonchalance.
Steve looked up from their tangled fingers. “So?”
“Do you want to?”
Steve’s eyebrows creased again but with more incredulity than irritation this time.
“Do I want to what?” He trailed his eyes down the body sitting in front of him, the body Eddie was currently residing in. “Did I not wear you out enough last night? And wouldn’t it be weird?”
Eddie grinned at him, a little surprised but also… kinda curious now.
“What I meant was ‘do you want to be my boyfriend?’ But also…” he tilted his head from side to side. “I’m not exactly opposed to the idea of fucking around like this.” 
“Well- I… Yes, obviously we’re boyfriends now. But, baby.” Steve muttered, apparently trying to seem bewildered, like it was what he was supposed to be feeling but there was a question in his eyes.
A question for himself or for Eddie, he didn’t know.
“What?” Eddie asked, all innocence and naivety. “If you think about it and we are stuck switching back and forth every second day…” he turned his eyebrows up, giving what he hoped was a devastatingly adorable puppy dog look, “do you only want to kiss me every second day?”
Steve scoffed. “Isn’t it like… wrong?”
“I don’t know if it’s ever happened before to be considered wrong.” Eddie scooted himself a little closer to Steve. “But we’re both consenting adults, y’know, if you wanna. No pressure. And it’s not like we’re hurting anyone else doing it.”
“I-” Steve hesitated, chewing on his bottom lip, apprehensive like he was expecting Eddie to jump down his throat. “I am… curious, I guess.” 
Eddie grinned at him, soft and sweet and Jesus Christ if he hadn’t already received confirmation that they were like, official now, he’d probably be on his knees just begging this boy to take a chance on him. 
“C’mere.” 
He gave Steve’s hand a light tug, pulling him just that little bit closer until he could pull Steve’s legs over his.
He stared into his own big brown eyes, took in his own lips and his own hair, his own neck and pale skin and tattoos while Steve did the same, looking over his own face while Eddie was on the inside, taking it all in.
“You lead.” Eddie said to him quietly, running his hands up and down Steve’s arms. “Whatever you’re comfortable with, we won’t go farther than that.”
Steve gave him a small smile, warm and fond and loving, raising a hand to cup his cheek.
“I know.”
He curled his fingers around Eddie’s neck, pulling him close.
The earth didn’t explode when their lips met, neither did their bodies. The Upside-Down didn’t come crawling into Steve’s bedroom and they didn’t feel anything catastrophically shift inside of them.
It was just a kiss.
If any kind of kiss with Steve Harrington could be called just a kiss.
And the thing was… neither Steve nor Eddie were particularly coy about the fact that they liked the way they looked. Eddie had admitted to himself long ago that he was cute, hot even, in a feral raccoon type of way and Steve had a habit of pausing in front of most reflective surfaces to primp a little and so like…
Was it weird to be into kissing himself?
Eddie didn’t know but if it was, who cared?
Like he said to Steve, he wasn’t hurting anyone else and anyway, weird was like, his thing, right?
Steve seemed to feel the same, if the tongue slipping into his mouth and the slow push to settle Eddie down onto his back was anything to go by.
Eddie ran his hands up over Steve’s bony sides, feeling the bump of his ribs under his fingers, trailing his fingers down his back, down the knobbly spine there and eventually gripped onto the sharp hip bones below, wondering just how far Steve was willing to go because Eddie was willing to go quite far.
He’d never had a pierced dick in his mouth, after all.
Eddie tangled his hands in Steve’s hair, his hair really, tightening his fingers and pulling the way he himself loved, but he was curious now, about whether that particular love would translate over with the swapping.
The sound Steve let out was somewhere between a gasp and a moan, just as delicious in Eddie’s voice as it was in Steve’s.
Because again, even through all of this, even through making out with his own body and really kind-of hoping he’d get to suck his own dick, it was only really Eddie shaped. He could still see Steve inside. 
Could still see him in his movements and smiles and little breathy exhales as Eddie ground his hips up, a little experimentally, pausing to see if Steve stopped him.
But Steve was just as eager, pushing his own hips back down to rub the two of them together, hard and wanting.
He separated from Eddie with a little pant, looking down at him, Eddie’s own flushed pink cheeks and wet mouth hovering above.
Steve trailed his eyes around, no doubt still able to see Eddie inside the golden tan skin and hazel eyes.
“This is weird, right?” Steve asked again, but the more he said it, the less bothered he seemed to be by it.
“I want to suck my dick.” 
Impulse control? Who is she? Never met her. 
Steve’s eyes went wide and his once pink cheeks lit up red. Then, with a shaky little laugh, he pressed his forehead down into Eddie’s collarbone.
“You’re going to fucking kill me.”
“Well I sure hope not.” Eddie quipped, stroking the back of Steve’s head as much as he could through the tangled wiry curls. Damn, they were gonna need to swap hair care routines if this kept up.  “But what a way to go, right? Here lies Steve Harrington, killed by Eddie’s incredible dick sucking skills.”
“It would be your body in the ground. Here lies Eddie Munson, killed by sucking his own dick.”
“That doesn’t sound as cool.” Eddie pouted, trying to wiggle his way down lower which wasn’t as difficult as he thought it would be. He was in Steve’s body, full of jock strength and Eddie’s body on top of him was like a twig, regardless of his apparent hidden muscle and the strength Steve had explored the day before yesterday.
“Can I?” He asked, using that lovely jock strength to roll them over so he was on top, continuing to squirm his way down Steve’s body, biting down hard on his hip bone.
Steve yelped and his hips jerked.
“Yeah, fuck, yes, go ahead.” He panted. “If I ever say ‘no’ to you sucking my dick, that’s how you’ll know I’m a pod-person.”
Eddie grinned up at him, sharp and hungry.
“Duly noted, Mr. Harrington, sir.” He said with a silly little mock salute but the way Steve’s eyes darkened and intensified at his words, oh boy.
They’d definitely have to explore that later. 
Eddie couldn’t deny he liked having strength on his side. He had just gotten his hands inside the waistband of the boxers Steve woke up wearing before he had the thought that… fuck it, they were his own boxers.
Right?
So without preamble, he removed his hands from the waistband and stuck his fingers into the little penis flap, whatever it was called, gripped it tight and ripped. 
The boxers split ragged and loud down the middle, leaving Steve with just the waistband around his hips and his legs still enclosed but that was okay. Eddie had gotten to his goal.
“What the fuck, Eds?” Steve breathed, shock and outrage swallowed up by the air being punched out of him, his mouth hanging open and his chest heaving. 
Eddie smirked up at him, “I’m eager.” He said, before diving right in. 
He caught his piercing in between his teeth and gave it a light tug before opening his jaw wide and sinking down as much as he could, which wasn’t as much as he usually could.
Shit, he was big. 
Not to brag but like… he was big.
But Eddie was a pro, he was determined and while Steve’s hands flew to his hair and his back bowed and Eddie gagged, he refused to give in, working himself back and forth until he could take more and more.
Once he’d gotten more comfortable he pressed Steve’s hand down harder on the back of his head, looking up at him through his lashes.
Steve in turn was looking down at him like he’d just seen a supernova or some shit. Like Eddie was wondrous and magical and well fuck if that didn’t give Eddie one hell of an ego boost.
Because who doesn’t want to be looked like that while trying to suck the soul out of the dick in their mouth?
It made pop rocks fizzle up in his gut and he redoubled his efforts, encouraging Steve to use his mouth as he saw fit, which he did.
Eddie couldn’t deny it was a little strange to glance up and see his own face staring back down at him, flushed and twisted in pleasure but it wasn’t a bad strange. 
Steve slammed his hips up, cock hitting the back of Eddie’s throat and despite Steve’s initial hesitation about how weird it might be, he was certainly going at it with full enthusiasm now.
Eddie allowed his eyes to slip closed, keeping himself loose and pliable and let Steve use him until his whole body went stiff and he crushed Eddie’s nose against his pelvis, spilling down his throat. 
He swallowed down as much as he could, letting Steve’s softening cock slip from his mouth and resting his head on Steve’s thigh with a contented sigh, despite his own raging hard on.
There was a light tug against his scalp and when he looked up, seeing Steve behind his own eyes with a soft smile on his face, he blushed. 
Blushed.
Like some teenage school boy.
“Come up here.”
Eddie complied, soft and syrupy, collapsing down next to Steve and scrunching up his nose as Steve laved kisses all over his face. 
“My turn.” Steve whispered to him.
Eddie lolled his head around as Steve started to kiss his way down his body. 
“You don’t have to.”
“I know.” He said, latching onto one of Eddie’s nipples and sucking, sending a zing of arousal through his body and coaxing a moan from his throat. “I want to.”
“Shit.” Eddie breathed as Steve pulled off. “Go right ahead then, sweetheart.”
Steve stuck his tongue out, his face scrunched up. “The chest hair might be a problem.” He scraped his arm over his tongue, trying to remove a phantom hair. “Might have to shave it off.”
Eddie shot up, scandalised and nearly headbutted Steve.
“Don’t you dare!”
Steve rolled his eyes with a little smile, planting a hand on Eddie’s chest and pushing him back down. “Alright, alright, keep your hair on.”
As soon as Eddie’s back hit the mattress, Steve had his boxers whipped off and dove down with just as much gusto as Eddie had.
The warm, wet heat enveloping him was nearly enough to send him over the edge already, as keyed up as he was just from how unusual and forbidden everything was.
He knew that any hope of him lasting any longer than a few sucks was gone when he looked down and saw his own plump lips wrapped around Steve’s cock, his own big brown eyes looking up at him and when Steve pulled his lips back to scrape his teeth ever so lightly along him, adding just a tiny bit of pain with the pleasure, Eddie was lost.
He came hot and heavy down Steve’s throat, melting back down into the bedsheets panting and so, so content.
Steve crawled his way back up to Eddie, cuddling into his side and they both just lay there for a moment, blissed out and coming down.
“That was-” Steve started but was cut off by the shrill ringing of the phone on his bedside table.
Eddie groaned and curled into Steve’s side.
“Make it shut up.”
Steve just snickered. “You gotta answer it, baby.”
“Me? Why me?”
Steve nuzzled his nose against Eddie’s throat.
“You have my voice.”
Eddie huffed. “This is not the princess treatment I was promised by all those rumours about your charm in school.”
“You want me to treat you good, princess?” Steve hummed into his skin, pushing closer. “Then you have to be good.”
Woah, okay. 
Eddie was not going to examine what was happening in his brain right now. He was going to straight up ignore it. Yep. Put it out of his mind completely and not think of it anymore. 
Until later.
But for now, he tried to shove down the blush to his cheeks, ignoring Steve’s delighted little smile and reached over to pluck the ringing phone from its cradle.
“Hello?”
There was a pause on the other end of the line.
“Steve? Is that you?”
That was Will’s voice.
Eddie wondered for a moment why Will would be even questioning who else could be answering Steve’s phone in Steve’s house.
“Uh, yeah. Yeah, it’s me kiddo.” 
Oh, wait. Oh, shit!
“I mean, uh, you’re through to the Harringtons. Steve speaking.” Eddie recited, remembering far too late how Steve usually answered the phone.
Steve hid his face in the pillow, trying to muffle his laughter.
“Um… Are you feeling alright… Steve?” Will didn’t seem to be buying the truly pathetic and half assed imitation of Steve that Eddie was trying desperately to pull off, but maybe he could try to act like he was hungover or something.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m good, man. I’m good. What can I do for you baby Byers?”
Will didn’t answer right away and Eddie could practically see him weighing his choices about whether to keep pressing or get to what he was calling about.
Eventually there was a sigh at the other end of the line.
“Have you heard from El?”
“El?” Eddie looked around to catch Steve’s eye. “Have I heard from El?” He repeated.
Concern flashed through Steve’s eyes and his eyebrows creased together as he shook his head.
“No. I haven’t. Is everything okay? What’s going on?”
“She’s… I don’t know. I woke up this morning and she wasn’t here. I think she left at some point last night, I don’t know where she is. She’s been feeling weird for a couple of days-”
“El’s missing?” Eddie said, alarmed, turning his wide eyes on Steve who practically shot out of bed and began to throw on any clothes within reach.
“Yeah, I mean-” Will hesitated “- I don’t know. I know she can take care of herself but it's like… I’m confused because it doesn’t- something’s telling me she’s not in danger. She doesn’t feel like she’s in danger.”
Eddie chewed on his lip. “Okay. Look, we’ll figure it out, we’ll get her back. We just have to-”
He clamped his mouth shut when he heard the front door downstairs slam open.
His eyes met Steve’s and in less than a second Steve was out the door with a baseball bat in his hand that Eddie hadn’t even seen him pick up.
“What was that?” Will asked, a little panicked through the phone.
“I- shit I don’t know. Stay there, I’m gonna check and move to the phone downstairs.”
Before Will had the chance to respond, Eddie placed the phone down next to the cradle and threw on any clothes within reach, practically tripping himself as he ran down the hallway.
The front door was now closed and standing in front of it was Steve, bent at the waist a little to match the height of none other than El, who was standing almost nose to nose with him, staring deep and terrifyingly intense into his eyes.
Neither of them flinched as Eddie made his way down the stairs and he approached as quietly as he could, not wanting to disturb whatever the fuck kind of psychic shit was no doubt going right now.
After another moment where Eddie was hovering awkwardly in the background, Steve straightened up and El stepped back with a small smile.
When she turned her eyes on him, he tried to shoot her a smile but it definitely came out a little more nervous than he would have liked.
“Did you feel a disturbance in the force, Supergirl?” He asked.
“I did.” She answered back with a little nod. 
“Oh.” Eddie blinked at her and then, “Will! Shit!”
He turned on his heel and ran into the kitchen, nearly tossing the handset of the phone across the room in his haste to get to it.
“Will.”
“Jesus Christ.” Will sighed, half exasperated, half relieved. “Don’t shout my ear off, I thought you’d been eaten by something.”
“Thankfully not, baby Byers. But your sister just arrived. That was her blowing the door off its hinges.”
“She’s there?” Will sounded like he was about to cry. “Can I talk to her?”
Eddie shrugged. “Don’t see why not.”
He turned to shout for El and Steve but nearly jumped out of his skin when El was standing directly behind him, looking up at him expectantly.
“Jesus fuck.” Eddie clutched a hand to his chest and El smiled. 
He held the phone out to her. “Your brother.”
“Thank you.” She took it from him and brought it to her ear. “Hello Will.”
Eddie retreated as Will’s volume began to slowly climb through relief and anger and panic and then back to relief again.
He found Steve leaning up against the wall in the sitting room, clearly waiting for them to come back out.
“She knows.” He muttered when Eddie sidled up next to him, leaning as well. Probably a little too close but he didn’t care right now.
“She knows?”
“About the swapping.” Steve clarified, keeping his voice low like there were other people around them. “She’d been feeling something the other day. It went away, probably when we’d swapped back but it started up again in the middle of the night and she panicked. Drove straight here.”
“Could have left a note so she didn’t scare the shit out of her brother.”
“I did leave a note.”
Eddie nearly jumped into Steve’s arms like Scooby Doo.
“Supergirl.” Eddie panted, trying to get his heartbeat back under control. “You’ve got to stop sneaking up on me like that.”
El just smiled at him, sweet and innocent. “It’s fun.”
Eddie rolled his eyes, resting his forehead on Steve’s shoulder while Steve snorted at her, ruffling her hair.
“Have you eaten yet, Ellie?”
El shook her head and her eyes went wide, almost pleading as she asked, quiet and hopeful “Grilled cheese?”
Steve smiled at her, a smile that was so Steve, all warm and crooked and parental even on Eddie’s face it made Eddie's heart flutter.
“Sure, I’ll make you grilled cheese.”
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It wasn’t until all their bellies were full, that El dropped the bomb on them.
“I think I can switch you back.”
Both Steve and Eddie gaped at her from across the kitchen counter, their shoulders brushing as they stood side by side.
“Like… permanently?”
El looked in between the two of them for a long and tense moment, her eyes going a little unfocused before she blinked the back.
“I’m not sure. But I could stabilise you. Stop you switching every night.”
Steve and Eddie glanced at each other, Eddie reading the same thoughts in Steve’s eyes as Eddie had in his head.
It would be nice to not have to plan their whole life around waking up in someone else’s body the next day but at the same time…
There were a lot of sexy possibilities.
“How would that work?” Steve asked, leaning forward on his palms a little. “Like if we’re stabilised, what…” his cheeks pinked up a little bit. “What could… destabilise us?”
El hummed, either not catching or not caring about the way they were acting.
“I’m not sure. Maybe high stress? If you’re both under a lot of stress at the same time? Heightened emotions? It could just be if you two think about it really hard. It’s difficult to say. I haven’t really come across a situation like this before.”
“Okay.” Eddie nodded, tossing possibilities back and forth in his mind. “And say if we were to…” he waved his hand around, ignoring the scandalised look Steve was shooting at him as if Eddie was about to spill their dirty secrets to her. “… experiment. You know, try to trigger it to figure out what causes it, would we be stuck that way again and have to get you to re-stabilise us?”
Honestly, if they had to drag El into it every time he and Steve decided to get freaky, they’d probably never do it. Which was a bit of a bummer, but they didn’t want to scar the kid. Even if she wasn’t a kid anymore.
“No. I don’t think so. I think once you empty your minds simultaneously, relax your bodies at the same time, you’ll go back to your stabilised state.”
“Oh. So that’s why it’s been happening while we sleep?” Steve asked.
El nodded, cocking her head to the side, her gaze burning into them. Her face was placid and calm but it was also terrifying. Eddie felt like she was looking into his very soul, seeing all of him.
He really hoped she couldn’t.
They glanced at each other again, coming to a silent and agreed upon consensus.
“Okay.” Eddie said, looking back at El.
Steve shifted just a little closer to him, firm in their conviction. “Stabilise us.”
Regardless of how things went from now on, regardless of whether they stayed in their own bodies forever or figured out the magic words to switch whenever they chose to, regardless of all that, when Steve reached out to take Eddie’s hand, holding on tight where El could see, Eddie knew, regardless of everything else…
He had Steve forever. 
And that was more than enough.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 AO3
As always, my biggest thanks and much love to @hbyrde36 for the beta work with this and to the @strangerthingswritersguild for their motivation!
Horny Rainbow banner by @cafekitsune
Purple Divider by @firefly-graphics
@r-a-t-p-a-t-t-o-o-t-i-e
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