#i dont pay much attention to the things going on

[fipindustries]

a thing that took me a long time to figure out is that the type of person that does this doesnt care so much about you doing the thing in itself.

What they truly want is for you to be the kind of person who notices these things and goes out of their way to help. What they want is to feel that you are paying attention to them and their needs because they see that as a sign that you care about them. And of course all of that is busted if they have to actually ask for it. The fact that they have to actually ask means that you didnt notice on your own which in their mind means you are innatentive and inconsiderate. Because, they reason, someone who truly cares would notice these things.

Now of course by the time you are doing stupid mind games its already too late, this is the person you are with abd you have to recognize that they are not the kind of person you want.

So with that in mind i dont think the solution is actually to ask for the specific thing that bothers you on a given time such as "please do this chore" or "it bothers me when you do X" because if they have to keep asking for every specific thing the real underliying problem of the other person not noticing is still there and the other person is going to continue to be angry every time they have to explicitly ask for every detail.

i think they real thing they need to verbalize is "please, i need you to be more attentive to my needs"

I know its horrible to be given such a broad and unspecified request that is almost asking you to become a completly different person but i think there is a limit to how much you can say "well i just dont notice these things ('these things' being other peoples needs) but is not for a lack of caring, im just blind to it due to [neurodivergence/too distracted by my own stuff/used to different living standards]"

because, i feel, at some point caring for another person means having some theory of mind about the other person, and thus some capacity to anticipate what bothers them and what doesnt. I dont think its that big a standard to expect someone to have some kind of awareness about the wants a needs of a close one that you are living with.

But of course is all a matter of degrees and this expectation can be pushed to the level that the other person is expecting outright mindreading out of you, which is obviously unfair

And i just want to clarify that im saying all this because i have had trouble with this in the past where i was the innatentive person and people kept getting mad at me for not noticing things and eventually it came to a point where i realized "ok at some point im being the asshole for not picking up these details and i should go out of my way to be more attentive"

I hate that thing some people do where it's like. "I left my wallet on the table to see if you'd say anything" or "I wanted to see if you'd wash the car if I stopped doing it"

Cause like

I dont know about anyone else

But I am perpetually hovering three inches above the strong subconscious belief that everyone knows what they're doing at all times except me, so if you change your normal patterns and I notice, then I will assume it is an intentional choice with a thought-out plan behind it and I will avoid interfering

And if I don't notice, because I won't, because why would I, because not much bothers me and if you don't say anything to indicate you are bothered then how would I KNOW

[basofy]

i think you can be as critical about the venezuelan opposition and maría corina and edmundo as you want but arent venezuelans allowed to choose for themselves even if the options arent perfect? are you willing to justify electoral fraud and police brutality, class inequality, bad management of resources, lack of maintenance of the country, breach of the law, lack of investment in health services and education etc etc just because the person doing it is someone you like or because you don't like the other option? are people at fault for wanting something different?

[state-of-florida-official]

dont even start about football. The bucs will beat your ass

Not a billion goals. Just. One. Goal.

Get this post to 5000 (I will change it to 10000 or 8000 maybe most likely only to 6k if i really don't want to do this, which I really don't, but I do update- I won't change the number at all it stays at 5k.) and I'll start worrying about how I look. I'll brush my hair. I'll wear nice, unwrinkled clothes. I'll start using those acne pads. I'll put more than just shampoo in my hair, I'll use product. I'll buy more clothes. I'll shave constantly. Most importantly, I'll start enforcing the fact that I'm trans.

UPDATE- 7 THOUSAND NOTES AND I WEAR THE FEMBOY HOOTERS SHIRT

(@real-sephora)

No more than like five to seven notes per person unless you're having a conversation with someone

[sonknuxadow]

"the sonic franchise has never had a misogyny problem" <- person whos never played a sonic game in their life

[sataron]

i now understand those "when someone gets my favorite character wrong" memes bcz.. ive been seeing some.. interesting*....takes on in-ho in the SG tag bro. the way they just water him down to some purely evil villain who just wants to torture gi-hun for fun bcz he's just some very evil bad guy who has no other feelings than being Evil😈 whatsoever. . as if the creator of the show AND the actor haven't explained how much of a complex and layered character he is . as if they havent explained how he's had a lot of mixed emotions all the while he was being disguised as young-il ??.. do NOT make me mad right now please i cang do.this

*as to not say straight up GOOF

[soaps-mohawk]

You’re actually so nice because if it were me I’d just delete all the asks about things you’ve already clearly answered in the lore posts. Like sorry but do your homework if you really want the answer to the question.

Reminds me of the people when I worked retail who would call the store for our regular open hours as if we weren’t a national chain with the hours on the website right next to the phone number you had to look up to call us

Ofc this is the bad reading comprehension sight so idk why I expect so much

It's so hard to be nice sometimes. Sometimes I literally have to get up and walk away because I just want to be mean. I honestly shouldn't be answering these right now because I'm very frustrated and feeling mean.

Like, most of the information is there. I hate seeing "sorry if you've answered this before" because I just know 75% of the time it's going to be a question I have already answered. And the answer is gonna be there, if they had just bothered to look. The ones that follow it up with "I looked but I couldn't find it" less annoying because at least you knew there was a whole list and did look. I know it's a lot and it's easy to miss things but please. I'm begging people to look.

That reminds me of Christmas day a couple years ago. I was having blood sugar issues and went to the ER and then my roommate at the time picked me up and we went to 7/11 and I kid you not in the like ten minutes we were there, one of the managers was just standing by the phone saying over and over "yes we're open" for every call. Like...7/11 never closes. Never. They're always open.

All the people who didn't pay attention in English class are really congregating in fandom huh 😭 I beg y'all to teach yourselves reading comprehension and analysis skills and critical thinking. It will save you (and everyone else) so much grief in your lives.

[angy-grrr]

I don’t get why ppl keep saying bkdk is dead or Horikoshi broke off bkdk. If that were true, this extra would look very different as you pointed out multiple times. The extra was still heavily focused on them and I hate how ppl are letting one no dictate the entire relationship. Izuku asks him to be a special lecturer too. I think the no just needs more clarification but other than that it is mostly fine. If a ship were to be shut down by the creator, it would look very different. Same logic for if a ship were to be canon, it would look different than what we got in the end for izu///ocha. This extra was bad in different ways from ships. It was just a whole lot of nothing that doesn’t meaningfully add anything to the story but I guess we shouldn’t be surprised since it is an extra. It is still an ambiguous ending that can be pretty fixable by one shots by Horikoshi in the future or even better by fanfiction lol. Except for the Toga part. That is just inexcusable

himiko-chan :(

and yeah! like even tho 431 is terrible not only for pairs but also for the whole story, it only confirmed Katsuki feels something really strong for deku and he doesnt notice bc he doesnt consider himself to be that great; they keep talking, and they keep being in each other's lives with no problem -they also imply they will work on communicating their feelings, as the special lecture is about this topic and deku also thinks katsuki doesnt see himself in a high regard. This is actually something that could be used in the future, as their relationship and arc isnt completely finished -in the way that they arent at a point of no miscommunication, no yearning, etc. They still need something to work with in regards to themselves and each other in the process. When it comes to midoriya and uraraka, idk what exactly could develop from what 431 tell us -seems to be mostly about paying attention to the ppl in your life instead of just letting life happen I guess? But idk what conversation or arc they could have together that wasn't resolved already, it was a really weird choice to focus on them as if there needs to be more explored -which is why choosing to not make them talk to each other nor think of the other in these years is potentially interesting, like the only way they could actually need to talk things up or have a separated special moment is if they just stop being friends and want to talk more from now on. Like, if they kept their friendship these years and were part of the other's life, there wouldnt be a moment like this at all.

I think it hurt mostly ochako -and deku if we interpret it as "deku just wants to be teacher, he is super happy about it, and loveeees so much his ex bestie after 8 years of no contact and never thinking about her"-, more than the bkdk relationship.

It would be interesting to see those one shots, if he does them -I know he said he wanted to do more things and little drawings and content for it, but idk if he will do something elaborate or just one page of something silly. I think he still has to opportunity of working with the material and make something at least not this bad -or completely ignore 431 and just continue with their adventures like 430 implies lol If he wants to double down with the "romance" I have no idea how he could do it with what he has tbh, unless he just ignores the plot and their personalities.

[never-quite-buried]

Why tiktok is more than a dance trend app.

And my own thoughts…

I’ve struggled with feelings of helplessness through the genocide in Gaza but tiktok has given us hope in the dark times. Through sounds and filters even those of us who were struggling financially ourselves were able to help. Watching videos all the way through to get them their lil payout, using sounds and streaming songs, playing with filters, it all accumulated to real tangible aid. When tiktok shop rolled out it became almost annoyingly omnipresent but activists found a way to make it work for themselves. Content on Gaza was not getting the reach it had been so they utilized the algorithim and used shop posts to get their message out to a wider audience as shop videos are given more push. They would advertise Palestinian owned businesses to generate larger cashflows to affected families and then donate their sponsorship money to charities delivering aid on the ground while giving updates on the crisis and other resources to help.

And they are ripping that support network away because they do not like how we are speaking or what we do when we assemble together. Through Operation Olive Branch and the TikTok intiative Pass The Hat i saw gfms that were stagnant be filled within a week or less, most of them well over 100k+ a piece. And when they met their goals the creators sponsored a new family and fundraised for them until that one was full. MILLIONS were raised for evacuation funds through tiktok.

We are STILL fundraising for them and the US gov is cutting us off BECAUSE OF THIS. AIPAC lobbyists were caught on hot mics saying tiktok needed to go because of our sympathy for the Palestinians. This ban, should it go through, will be inextricably tied to the Palestinian genocide in our history books.

[expedition33]

my mom constantly complains that i'm really hard to buy presents for and it's like......am i though. am i really. i don't think i am... i think if she paid literally any attention to me/the things i like it'd be really easy, actually. but what do i know man...

[trans-estinien]

i love being autistic cause sometimes i get a glimpse into how regular people perceive things and its like. what the fuck. what the fuck is that? you live like this? and its normal?? i think YOURE the weird one actually. im fine. thanks though.

[waywardsalt]

1 and 8 for the choose violence ask game?

1 (the character that everyone gets wrong): ok this one is tricky for me bc to some degree im cool with ooc-ish stuff on the case of like aus/personal interpretation/whatever AND i am actually someone who doesnt actually read a lot of fanfic and doesnt have tooooo many really strong feelings abt characters outside of phantom hourglass so this one i had to think abt for a bit for a character that i have strong enough feelings on and actually like. care and know how ppl popularly interpret them. i am a bit of a hater but its very specific haterism a lot of the time. so i don’t really have much of an answer for this? (except to say im a bit put off by ww/ph link as like some hardened rough and tumble pirate type, that’s always felt off to me)

8 (common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about): shut up about linebeck committing tax fraud shut UP about linebeck and tax crimes he’s a THIEF like CANONICALLY textually theres a whole fucking subplot that’s caused by him being a THIEF BITCH. he recommends theft to link at least once. shut the FUCK up about fucking tax fraud. what you all want is that mob psycho cunt. burglary is a hotter crime anyways.

[queer-things-and-stuff]

the movie isn't out yet, it's just a trailer

ok lol ty i will stop screaming at the top of my lungs. gonna go watch the trailer now and then maybe run an 8k cause i’m still kindAAAAAHHHHHH-

[sugaredparchment]

i haven't done any work I'm on my monthly crying about people mischaracterizing chaol moment (I'm not normal about this in the tags if you're in for a rant)

[valvesoftware]

breakups are so fucking weird. three years and just like that it's gone. huh

[esoraluco]

how to: make me never want to play your game again!

make my favorite, CLEARLY LARGE (could be buff, fat or both) character skinny

[dyqo]

while japanese isn’t specifically a tonal language pitch does come into play in a lot of words and can be important (but not entirely necessary) in differentiating homonyms. For the most part i think its pretty intuitive but it definitely still trips me up at times. But i couldn’t explain how it works specifically if u payed me