#i dont know where i wanted to go with thi

[tunapesto]

let's fall down together

[boygirlctommy]

i made 2 new ocs and i love them but one of them is going to die and im upset about it

[skyllion-uwu]

Good lird the scientist and eir fucked up lab experiment are kissing with tongue as they lay on the ground bleeding out together. Maybe doing more.

[luciusspriggss]

not to toot my own horn

but i have figured out massive twists in many movies, shows, and books.

and i mean i figured it out immediately

people hate watching murder, she wrote with me, because a character will be introduced, and after they talk for like a minute, i KNOW they are the killer. and i. am. ALWAYS. right!!!!! i just KNOW

if something surprises me i either think, holy fucking shit that is amazing, i need to rewatch and re analyze so i can prepare for future twists!

OR what the fuck was that?

and i get a headache, rewatching, re analyzing, reading other peoples analysis to get different perspectives (i LOVE seeing how people think and connect things because i then admittedly try to steal that technique to use for future media readings. i mean when i analyze shit, i go first with my gut, THEN i start reading different interpretations and try to understand how they were made in the first place. it is FUN) and i usually am able to figure out various readings and why a piece of media must have done what they did

this finale has truly stumped me

i am at a stalemate for the first time while consuming a piece of media

which tells me i am missing something i haven't even considered yet

[atenceladusiaawfytbwb]

🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣Unflowologing a lot of creators that turned out, I despised them, and or slightly inconvenience me, but mostly that, you know omg🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣 🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🔈🔊🔉🔉🔉🔉🔉🔊🔊🔊🔊And I share this because I'm currently hot angry,

and right, ironically and as joke sure, but also seriously, heartfully, I'll share what I think

I myself create a little, somewhere else, and is small, tiny, but I do like what I do and treasure it. Still can't imagine the level of disgust some get to feel against those who don't experience/enjoy/interact a certain way with it. Maybe I've just havent done something myself that I love so much, and put so much work into, that I turn into "ugh you don't have the right - block me if you don't like it not my problem- if you like but don't reblog you are literal thrash - some of you are so entitled to my work - didnt ask for you opinionnsonyou can go f urself and i may have reacted completely different to other interactions like yours positively with the only diference that what was told appealed to my very own perspective but that has nothing to do with the way im being mean and smug to you because the problem is that what you just said is objectively dumb and I cant believe you hadnt guessef id react negatively and that doubles my disgust towards you and i better never hear you enjoy anything made by me because I, a pixel on the web, condemn thy, another pixel on the web to never have acsses to my works publiced here, publicly and freely, on the internet. And you better do as I say, or what? Are that much more of a disgusting person-" Que finding other unrelated stuff (truk6 unrelated like wtf) to add on to why this one (person b/anon/fan/anyone) is very wrong and therefore this other one (person a/creator/anyone) is right, superior even, Que too that if public other people (unrelated too) have to show that much despise towards B or they are disgusting enablers supporters idk

And it is quite specific, I know, but it has happened enough times with different people/situations to be a thing.

Like an anon hey could I (something. Not mean or entitled (no, not related to ai use at all (obviously?))) And oh boy the answer. Oh boy, like: oh so you think that you can (a bunch of awful stuff the one asked got out of their ass bc was nowhere on the ask/comment) the audacity, omg wtf, the nerve- and the revlogs are of other people tagging stuff like ph yeah I can't believe it like the mental problems this annon must have'

I have a decent social understanding, I think? No, there wasn't condescending undertones or something to read between lines, unless you want to, because then you can do that about anything. Giiiirl like ioiiffffffoooofff I got ooooofff wtf fuck is so wrong with them bitch just called them stupid or dumb and move on? A paragraph on why bdjshdhdhdhfhd I can't write anymore idk fucking fuck fuck FUCHCFUCKFU K SGU K SHIT BITCH FUCK

[chillllii]

i regret getting a cat in my current situation

[strawbebyjam]

(,:

[normansnt]

As you've likely seen by now, I've been reblogging nearly every Hazbin fic you have, which I apologize if that bothers you at all. I simply see a lack of the x male reader department for this show, which is ironic considering mostly all the characters are queer and so are the creators. So thank you for what you write and how well you write it! I was hoping I could make a request for a part two of a fic I rather liked "(Vox x bar tander!Male reader)" this one specifically. The reader left off having their soul contract bought and offered to be a bartender at the Vee's private bar, and I was wondering what would happen from there?

HIIIIII

THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST

Im really sorry it took so long😭

Also THANK YOU SO MUCH for the reblogs is doesn't bother me at all IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY WRITING💗💗

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT, I THINK IT TURNED OUT PRETTY GOOD😌

ENJOY READING LOVELY PEOPLE

Warnings: Attempted Rape, violance V@lentino

Habit of saving

as a thank you pt.2

Vox x bartender!male reader

"I just dont fucking understand why the fuck you prefer the company of a lowly bartender over mine"

You hear Valentino's yelling from the other room, again.

This was not uncommon. Since you became the bartender in the Vees manor Vox visited the bar more often than before.

You guys spent hours talking and just because of the drinks either, he barely drunk anything cuz he was busy talking to you.

However, this of course annoyed Valentino. He wanted Vox's attention purely on himself.

"I don't." Said Vox, you know, like a lier.

"Work has just been really stressful lately and I need more drinks than before."

This was all lies. But Vox was not in the mood to be taking Valentino's shit, he would much rather go get a drink with you.

"Bullshit, I know how your work is and you blame everything on it, you dont even want to fuck me anymore are you a fucking moron do you know how many people want to get with ME."

And here he goes again. Vox was a little embarrassed though. It was true that since you arrived he was never in the mood to do it with Val, but he found himself having much more sex dreams with you.

He got red at the thought of that.

"You know what, I don't fucking care, go be happy with your boy toy; but don't you dare forget that you are where you are because of me." Ended the Argument Valentino as he grabbed a bottle from above your head, and walked out of the room.

You were silent during the whole argument. You knew it was not smart to start defending Vox you tried that once and, well, Vox had to stich you up afterwards.

"Care for a drink, sir?" You asked Vox. He was still, just standing in the middle of the room looking at the door.

He felt weird. Well, not weird, happy. But that was strange. Usually he felt guilty or annoyed when Valentino stormed off after a fight, usually he wanted to go after him. But not now. Now he felt...calm. Relieved even. He really wanted to sit down and have that drink with you.

"Yes, I would love a drink, and I've told you multiple times to call me Vox."

"Yeah I know but I didn't want to risk Val still hearing it." You chuckled.

"So, the usual, Vox?"

"Obviously." He answered back.

"Are you ok?" You asked as you poured his drink. You two were close enough for this not to be an awkward question. You were the bartender, you have comforted him after a night of drunken crying and put him to bed multiple times. He always asked you to stay. You never did. You just didn't feel ready yet.

"Getting better by the day, his antics don't affect me as strongly anymore." He commented calmly.

"I'm glad." You gave him his drink and you two continued talking.

And you talked, long into the night. Vox got a bit drunk again.

"All right mister I think it's time to get you to bed." You said smiling softly as you were about to jump from behind the bar and help him to his room.

"I can take care of him." Came a creepy calm voice from the door way. You saw Valentino.

He had a fake smile on his face. You knew this was trouble but he was kind of your boss.

"All right, sir." You just answered quietly, as Val took Vox and started to take him to his room.

"What-no, you-- (Y/N)--I, don't"

Vox mumbled drunken.

When they left the room you had a silent debate with yourself.

Yes Val was your boss. But you knew that taking advantage of someone while they're drunk was not below him.

"Fuck it" you mumbled to yourself as you jumped from behind the bar and tried to quietly run after them.

Thankfully you found them when they were about to enter the room.

When they got in you made sure to put your foot between the door and the frame so it doesn't close.

You peered into the room and you saw Val throw Vox onto the bed.

"You fucking whore, you couldn't keep your hands of the cute bartender boy could you."

He started angrily as he stepped onto Vox's screen, breaking it. You already wanted to barge in there when you saw this but when he started unbuckling his belt, thats when you snapped.

You jumped on Val, literally. And while the man might be powerful he had close to no muscles so he crumbled under you.

You knew you had close to no chance of winning. But you didn't care. You had to save Vox.

You tried to cut off Val's breathing by holding onto his neck for dear life. You might have been physically stronger he was still an overlord. A very powerful one.

You expected to be thrown down onto the floor any minute when the struggling finally stopped.

Your eyes opened widely as you hurriedly got off of Valentino.

You started panicking. What the fuck did you just kill an overlord? No, no there is no way he is so powerful why didn't he stop you.

You kneeled down and checked for a heart beat.

When you felt faint beating a boulder fell off your shoulder.

"Thank fuck" you commented to yourself. He probably just passed out.

But still why didn't he stop you.

You thought about it a but when it hit you. He was probably batshit drunk himself. You saw that when he walked away from the bar he barely managed to walk straight.

You were still panting.

You looked over at Vox and a strong feeling of sadness filled you.

You stepped over Vals passed out form and lifted up Vox.

He was lighter than you thought. You carried him all the way to your room where you knew you had a first aid kit.

Sure you could have just bring the first aid kit to him but you were not going to leave him alone with Valentino jot even for a second. Not even when they're both passed out.

After you put Vox's screen back together and batched him up you laid him down onto your bed.

This gave you time to think things through.

Even you couldn't explain to yourself why you cared about Vox this much.

Its true you have become very close during your time working here.

But there are people who you have known longer yet do not love as much as him.

...love?

You love him?

"(Y/N)"

While you were occupied with your thought you didn't notice the time. It was morning already.

"Yeah, Vox?"

"What the fuck happened?" He asked as he started touching his patched up screen.

You told him everything. You also told him that you will very likely have to leave because once Val wakes up...you don't want to know what he'll do to you.

"He can't do anything your soul is mine you are under my protection." He said firmly. He sat silently after that. Like someone who is contemplating something.

"Can I ask you something?"

He asked after a long silence.

"Of course"

"Why did you save me?"

This surprised you.

"Well, I mean I know what Val is like and...I just did what any normal person would do really-"

"No. You know no one in hell would to that for the demon that owns their soul. Not to mention this was the second time you saved me."

"...I honestly don't know why I did it the first time; I guess I just felt like...I dont know"

"And the second time."

You couldn't answer this. You knew the answer but you didn't want to say it.

"Well, you are a nice boss you treat me with kindness and-"

"No one would attack a powerful overlord just to safe their boss who is just 'nice'; try answering truthfully this time."

Well fuck. You knew Vox was a smart man but that didn't help you in this situation.

"I..." you didn't know what to do. You could come up with another lie but he would detect it no problem.

"I love you" you blurted out before you could stop yourself. The moment the words left your lips you smacked your hands onto your lips.

"I'm sorry sir I will leave-"

Vox took your hand in his when you wanted to stand up and pulled you towards him.

With one swift movement he placed his lips on your in a tender kiss.

You have never kissed a screen before but you were pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be like this.

His lips were soft but cold. It was an amazing kiss.

"Oh, you're not going anywhere." Said Vox while he let out a little chuckle.

"Because I love you too."

[little-annie]

NSFW STEDDIE & STOBIN TEXT CHAIN

Steve normal text. Robin’s Bold. Eddie's Italicized Bold

---

___Bird Brain___

Rob

Bobby

Bobin

What? Im literally right next to you

And were at work Dingus get off of your phone.

No.

I'm. Uh.

?

You know the shop across the street???

?

The mecanic

Mecanic

Fuck

Mechanic

Okay.

They have a new guy

Okay.

And?

Gay.

Literally, what?

I think I'm gay.

Steve

Cuz like he's just so pretty

Steven

And that Haut

Stephanie

Hair

Hey whore

Wut

Bathroom talk. Now.

Were working.

You and I both know no one rents movies on a Tuesday at 10am

Bathroom.

Now.

To the porcelain thrown

You know sometimes I forget youre an idiot 20 something

then you go and say shit like that

…

Bitch.

Whore.

---

How do I tell if a mans gay or whatever its is that I am,

,

Fuck

?

Bi schedule

Bi sexual

Ducking auto correct

Babe. I hate to break it to you but your auto correct is as dyslexic as you are. You basically train it

I-

Huh.

Well ghen.

Anywho.

Gay.

Whats he wear? Any piercings? Tattoos? Whats his hair like?

Oh! This is important. DOES. HE. HAVE. A. HANKY. IN. A. BACK. POCKET???

black overalls and a black shirt. Lots. I think. His ears literally look shiny from across the street. Lots of tattoos too.

And yes??? What's that have to do with anything? My papa had a hanky and I'm pretty she he wasn't gay

He probably was. Being Bisexual is genetic.

Actually?

No Dingus.

But like the man was in the navy? Right?

Ya

Gay.

Stfu

ANYWAY

HANKY.

YES.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

FUCK YEAH.

WHATS IT LOOK LIKE AND WHAT POCKET?

???

it's black

Oh hes kinky

What side pocket

It switches.

I bet it does

Gay.

That is a gay man Steven.

Go get your dick sucked or your booty bumped or whatever it is the kids are doing these days.

Eating ass

EXCUSE

yeah. It's a thing.

:0

Robin you literally munch so much carpet. whats the difference if its the rug at the back door.

Never.

Ever.

Say.

That.

Again.

Bubble bath privileges revoked.

You whore.

---

The bath is sad with no bubbles Bob.

Make your own.

…

Okay. Ew. Stop. Stink ass. I can hear you. And the neighbors probably can too.

Are you sorry?

Not really.

Well pretend to be.

Kay.

IM SO SORRY

…

:’(

better

Your bubble bath is under the sink

:D

---

Eddie

Wut.

Thats your new lovers name.

WUT

ROBIN.

WHAT DID YOU DO.

---

*1 new message* Hi -the weirdo with long hair who works across the street (Eddie)

---

I hate you

BTW babe you have a date on Tuesday

ROBIN IT IS TUESDAY

oh ya.

Well you have a date today gay boy

…

I need to leave

The fuck you do

Yeah. I fucking do.

I need to shower

And shave

And

I dont know

What do you do before a gay date

Prep?

For what?

Oh honey

---

Should this hurt?

8⁰

Don't tell me

Are u?

Yes.

Shut up.

…

Does it hurt

Like.

Kinda?

Lube. Oh my god. LUBE. Steve I swear to Dolly, if youre prepping your fucking asshole right now, IN THE FUCKING WORK BATHROOM

I

WILL

END

YOU

:*

Youre a whore. Oh my god.

STEVEN I CAN HEAR YOU.

STOP.

This is nice.

Why havent I done this before.

Where's the protest

Prostate

Rob?

Brain me. Educate me please.

…

Nvm

Oh fuck

Found it

Definitely found it

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

like good for you babe. I love you and support you but OH MY GOD YOU WHORE GET YOUR FINGERS OUT OF YOUR ASS WERE AT WORK.

…

You really think Id do that

Obviously

Im fucking with you

Im just googling shit and well taking a shit.

Fuck you

Love you

---

*2 New messages.* um. So. Im Eddie. Your coworker. Robin? Gave me your number and said we're going out tonight???

---

Dingus have you answered your husband yet

FUCK. NO. WHAT DO I SAY.

well you could send him a picture of your ass

Or your tits

Or your weeeen

Or all of the above

Like a package deal

Hehe. Package.

Robin.

Ugh. Wut.

Be serious.

Fiiiiine. Introduce yourself. Tell him youre excited for tonight. Make a plan for your date. (Other than the reservation I booked you at Enzos) and then tell him you thi know hes pretty and you want to have his babys.

He is pretty.

And like. Id definitely let him try to get me pregnant

ANSWER HIM.

FINE.

---

___Future Husband___

um. Hi. First of all I'm so sorry for my friend. She likes to get her nose into my business. Second.

…

Ithinkyourereallyprettyandimexcitedfortonight.

At the risk of being too forward. I like literally saw you my first day at the shop and have wanted to talk to you since. Cuz. Yeah. Pretty doesnt even begin to explain what you are. Like. Bro. Have my babies.

FUCK

I CANT BELIEVE I SAID THAT

disregard the baby thing

I dont know about getting pregnant. But Im up for practice.

Like.

If you are???

8⁰

… like

Now?

My breaks in 20

Fuck

Really?

Meet me at the van across the street

:*

---

___Bird Brain___

STEVE

STEVEN

YOU WHORE

ARE YOU GETTING YOUR BACKDOOR RUG MUNCHED ???

OMG

YOU ARE

THE VAN ACROSS THE STREET IS SHAKING

AND ID BET YOUR LEFT NUT THAT YOURE IN IT

…

GET IT I GUESS BABE

DONT GET PREGNANT

OR DO

YOU DO YOU BOO

…

youre on your own for the rest of the day Birdie

And where the fuck do you think youre going

Eddies

…

Boo you whore

But like. Get it babe.

But I also hate you.

I dont want to work in this shithole alone

Steven

Answer me

Hi Robin

This is Eddie

On Steves phone

Steve's a little… preoccupied

OH MY GOD

WHAT HAVE I DONE

YOU TWO ARE GOING TO BE DISGUSTING

BUT BRO. ILL END YOU IF YOU BREAK HIS HEART

STRAIGHT UP DIG YOU A GRAVE IN THE DITCH AND BURN OFF YOUR FINGERPRINTS AND BREAK YOUR TEETH SO NO ONE CAN IDENTIFY YOUR BODY.

COLD CASE BRO

what would you do about my tattoos

Fuck you

Sorry. Positions taken.

Id burn your whole body. No skin = no tattoos

I like the way you think

But in all seriousness

Mmmm imma gonna marry this boy

Hopefully before the end of the week

Fuck yeah

I call best man

[myrunawaysweets]

Imagine a life in Louisiana New Orleans, 1920.

Your a nice little lady, dragged to a nightclub by your friend. You didn't want to go initially due to the recent murders, but mimzy just had to go for her "reputation "

The loud music played as mimzy was surrounded by young men, most likely trying to get in her pants, er skirt. Mimzy always loved that kind of attention. You on the other hand, did not.

But of course, being near mimzy meant her little fan club of boys would sometimes drift to you aswell.

"Whats a fine doll like you doin here with a tramp like mim?" A young man spoke up, his cheeks flushed to show how many drinks he had so far.

"Shouldn't you be with the rest of your troop? You know, cheering for mimzy instead of belittling her?" You inquired, not even sparing the man a glance as you swished your whiskey in the glass it was in.

"You're right..." The boy spoke "but would you believe me if I said i fell in love with you from the moment i saw you?"

You knew it... these boys playing grown ups used that same line everytime they were around you.

You rolled your eyes to his response "nice try little boy but I dont play those games, so how bout you run along and try that on the next poor broad you see?" You waved your hand to shoo him away. "Maybe you'll have better luck next time-"

A tight grip was held on your wrist making you look up from your drink.

"So your just going to brush me off like that huh?" The drunkard looked into your eyes, previously clouded with lust was now darkened with anger "do you even know who I am, little lady?"

The man's grip tightened, making you wince.

You opened your mouth to tell him to let go but before you can even get the words out of your mouth, a gentle hand was placed on your waist and another vice grip on the man's wrist.

"My, is that any way to treat a lady, young man?" A cheery voice spoke up "every gentleman knows not to raise his hand to harm a lady, especially a lady they are courting"

The drunk young man let go of your wrist. Looking up at the brunette who has yet to face you.

"I think its time for you to go little boy" the brunette pushed the boy to the ground, watching him run away until he was out of sight.

The brunette turned towards you, revealing a handsome man around your age, a tan complexion accompanied with matching dark eyes and a shiny smile "are you alright my dear?" His voice was ever so cheery, just like his smile.

"Thanks..." you replied, rubbing your wrist.

"The names alastor, pleasure to meet you sweetheart! Quite a pleasure!" He held his hand out in which you shook.

"(Y/n), the pleasure is all mine" you were skeptical of him.

"What brings you here by yourself?" Alastor spoke, his hands now behind his back.

"I'm with a friend, mights heard of her, her names mimzy" you pointed over to your short friend who was giggling away, throwing back glass after glass of whiskey, bought by her little play things.

"Your a friend of mimzy? What a coincidence!" Alastor laughed "she invited me out here but I couldn't find her, shall we go greet her together?" The brunette held his arm out in an attempt to escort you to the little flapper.

You hesitantly took his arm and followed him towards your little pal.

"Mimzy!" Alastor walked towards the blonde.

Mimzy looked up from her crowd and smiled. "alastor! I was wondering where you've been!"

"I was searching for you when I came across one of your friends who had some trouble!" The man gestured towards you "you never told me you had such a pretty gem!"

"Yeah, she's a real looker ain't she?" She winked at you "though I'd love to talk some more, I was just entertaining some of these folks" she gestures towards the crowd of boys.

"Don't let me keep you mimzy" Alastor waved in dismissal and walked back to you "my it is crowded in here"

You nodded "This kind of thing isn't really my style" you waved at the crowded place.

"Me neither, mimzy always insists that I come" alastors smile stays bit his eyes show his distaste for this place before lighting back up "say, I know this nice place down the street, what say we ditch this place and head for a meal?"

Following a man you just met into the night? Couldn't be more of a death wish... but he didn't seem all that bad, plus he and mimzy seemed to be on good terms so whats the worst that could happen?

"Yes please" you sighed, smiling.

"Aha! That's better my darling! I haven't seen you give a proper smile all evening! It sits you!" He bellowed, holding his arm out to escort you once again.

Once you left the building, it didn't take long for you two to fall into conversation.

It turned out that alastor ran a radio channel, broadcasting about this and that, more so about those pesky murders as of late.

Alastor had learned that you don't usually go to these things due to the way men look at you with a lustrous gaze, so openly at that. Instead of following mimzy on these nightly activities, you would stay home and tend to your little restaurant.

"I know it's not really suitable for a lady to be owning a business, but if im going to end up cooking for a man, might as well get paid to do so, am I right?"

Alastor couldn't agree more, letting you in on some secrets his mother had told him about cooking.

"Your not so bad al" you laughed after he had told you a particular dad joke "not bad at all"

Now, alastor was never one to indulge in romance, but the way you smiled, the way you set your dreams to be so big... he couldn't describe the feeling it left... but it was addicting, more addicting than the screams he would entice almost every night from his victims. Yes he originally planned to kill you, but after actually getting to know you, he couldn't bring himself to do it.

"Thanks..." his voice was quiet "your not bad at all either"

The night went off without a hitch, you even let him walk you to your house which just so happened to be connected to your restaurant.

"Do drop by if you get a chance, I'll try out that jambalaya recipe for you" you smiled, leaning on the open door.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, darling!" He bowed before walking down the empty dark street.

The next time mimzy invited you out, you didn't hesitate to accept. You hadn't heard from alastor since the delightful night you two had.

Mimzy gave you the address and promptly hung up the phone.

You didn't want to be late, so you ended up being early, too early. The sun was only just setting, casting a golden hue onto the city.

You had hoped the doors would be opened but you're luck ran short on that part.

It was a chilly evening. That much was clear as a breeze brushed by, making you shiver.

It wasn't long until mimzy came by and the nightly routine began.

Boys flocked to mimzy, buying her drinks, and a few stragglers found their way to you.

The boy from the previous night came back, looking up and down, lust evident in his eyes once again.

"I'm guessing you came back in regret?" His nice guy act was no doubt gone, revealing his true colors.

You scoffed and continued to listen to the music. Frank Sinatra had such a heavenly voice...

Your thoughts were interrupted by the man yanking your hair "listen here, you harlot, no one ignores me... so here's what we're going to do" you felt something sharp and cold press against the opening of your dress on your back "we're going to walk out of here, got going to be a nice birdie and not make a peep, understood?" His breath fanned into your ear, reaking of alcohol.

Fear ran cold in your veins as you couldn't do anything but gently nod.

You trembled, making the man's eerie smile widen as you felt something poke at your back.

As soon as you got out, the empty street revealed that no one could help you now as he led you to the alley beside the building.

Tears pricked your eyes as he shoved you into the brick wall as he squished his face into the crook of your neck, inhaling your perfume, the perfume you wore for alastor.

"Please stop" you managed to sob out.

It echoed out of the alley, and right onto the ears of the man you'd hoped to see.

He was standing outside of the club, debating whether or not he should enter. Would you be waiting for him? Has he been on your mind constantly, just like you have for him? Has he plagued every crevice of your brain just like you have in his? Or did you think little of the evening between you two, and gone back to your life...

His thoughts were interrupted by your sob.

His blood ran hot in his veins... you were here, but instead of having fun, you were in an alley in god knows what condition...

He walked towards the alley, everything seemed to be in slow motion...

There, before his own eyes, you were crying, the sleeve of your dress pulled down as the man behind you shamelessly grinded into you as he pulled your hair, biting into the soft skin on your shoulder.

"I thought I told you to behave..." alastors voice was heard from the opening of the alley "especially with a lady"

The man looked up from you with a glare "stay out of this, you square" he pulled out the knife and pointed it towards alastor making your eyes widen in fear of him being hurt to save you "unless you want me to cut you up"

The sight of you being worried for him made alastors head spin with glee, but this was no time for that.

"Darling Belle, close your eyes for a moment, will you?" Alastors smile was strained yet firm as a murderous aura clouded the alley way.

You did as told, wanting this night to be over with.

Screams were heard. Alastors hands moved quickly as he used his brute strength and adrenaline to break the man's knees backwards and draped his coat over you.

bones cracking and blood spilling filled the alley way along with the sound of alastors giggling.

Before you knew it, it was over and the man had passed it from blood loss and pain.

Alastor placed his hands on your shoulders as you trembled, bruises and bite marks all evident on your body as he guided you out of the alleyway.

"Sorry you had to experience that, darling" alastor apologized like you had seen him shirtless instead of him killing a man.

It took you a while, but you eventually spoke.

"Thank you... alastor" your head leaned against his chest as you felt tears start to form once again.

Alastor was never one for physical touch, but then again, he wasn't one for regular emotions, relationships, or even human connections, yet you bypassed all of his limits.

He sighed, and held you close.

"Its quite alright darling... " this was all new to him, so it didn't conquer to him that it would be the wrong time and mood for his next words "I could never let anything happen to you... i love you..."

You froze, slowly looking up at the man who held you so tenderly in his arms in the middle of the empty street... those words were spoken many times to you... your ex fiance before h ran away with his mistress, your family before he disowned you leaving you to fend for yourself in the harsh city, and your guy friend who supported you after the disownment who had confessed to you as you stayed at his apartment, running the friendship and trust... how could you ever trust anyone who spoke those words?

Alastors hold around you was gentle... it was comforting... you had only known him a few days, a week at most, having only met twice... yet he said he loved you?

"You love me?" You inquired... no longer liking the feeling of his arms around you as they felt fake

"I love you... " alastor smiled, though it seemed nervous as your gaze made him feel like he had something stupid...

Inspired by the song "something stupid" by Frank Sinatra.

[4pfsukuna]

Could u write a sukuna fluff where he helps reader take down her braids and do her wash day 🙈

Debrief: i loved writing these cute little 1k word sfw fluff… in sukunas way

“What is it the braids!”

“Say it again and imma punch you in the throat” you huff stabing your braid with the tip of the tail comb wishing you could stab it into something else. You regret the day you introduced your boyfriend to kendrick lamar and worse explained the kendrick and drake beef. You remember the exact moment he decided to become a fan, it was exactly one month ago.

“So he woke up and chose violence?” He ask with a wicked smirk on his face. “Just started atttacking him through the music leaving psychological scars and making everyone hate him?” He follows up and you nod bopping along to the beat of not like us playing through the speakers of your rose gold macbook. 

“Yeah a real menace but the people love him” you tell him swooping your edges with the mini cheetah print brush careful not to make it to big so you wouldnt become the next meme on social media.

“I approve” his wicked smile grows until he hears a specific part that makes his eyes light up.

But that was a month ago, and even then you were holding on to these braids and knotless werent something to hold on to. Especially with the boho hair pieces getting tangled from you and your boyfriends sex sessions no amount of swooped edges, manipulated styles or headbands could save the style.

Unfortunately he loved you with these braids, loved that you had them a maroon color. The same color of his eyes. He thinks you look like a goddess but he would never tell you that can’t have you to arrogant.

So when a white man at the grocery store tells you he loves the braids, you immediately cancel date night with your boyfriend and head home to take them down. Enough was enough and that was all the sign you needed.

Sukuna isnt happy though and why would you expect him(derogatory) to just be okay with it and leave you alone. 

“Woman, explain” he ask with an annoyed look… well he always looks annoyed, he almost misses the section in your hair, it is very small, of braids thats youve already taken out.

“A white man complimented my hair so i have to take it down” you explain and when you dont offer any further explanation except just a blank stare with a tiny pout he nods. He knew better than to ask anything about your hair.

He barges in, in his true fashion kicking off his shoes at the door before sitting where you were sat.

“Uraume is good at hair stuff… want me to call them?” He offers not sure of how to help when your mood visibly sinks further but you just shake your head. 

“No i just… its so much its going to take days and im sorry for canceling i just—“ your eyes begin to water and Sukuna doesnt know how to handle this. Hes use to his big strong girlfriend who even though shes nearly a foot shorter you werent scared of him, scared to threaten him or scared to put him in his place. You problem yelled at him more than he yelled at people plus he would never forget the day you put him in a headlock. It kinda turned him on.

“Sweetheart let me help you then, put on some of your music that you like and sit between my legs like you make your neice do when you do your hair and ill pay to get your next style, okay” he rushes out pulling you to him in a hug and he hears you sniffle. For a woman that bullied a known menace to society you could be so sensitive sometimes but he loves that. Loves when you run into his big strong arms for protection.

“Can we get food?” You sniffle into his shirt and he chuckles squeezing you tighter.

“As long as you dont get your nasty snot on my shirt” he teases making you laugh.

“What is it the—nggh! Did you just bite me?!” He hisses tugging a little rougher on one of your braids making you whine. It didnt hurt but you were so tired, your arms were in pain from holding them up so long and your neck from leaning it against his muscular and meaty thigh.

“I told you stop saying that” you hiss dropping your arms tired of sitting here your butt was hurting also there was only but so many angles you could sit in. He promised booty rubs an hour ago but you had so many braids you were never going small again.

“Ugh you are the worst client ever, youre actually never allowed back to my malevolent salon of doom” he mimics the way you play pretend with your niece over he sees you getting frustrated again and your immediate cable lets him know that was the right thing to say and he’s proud.

You run your fingers through the back of your head pretending to scratch trying to see how many he has left when you notice he’s actually completely done before a loud smack and your hand is stinging.

��Did you just pop me?!” You're shocked, and with the comb nevertheless?! Oh he was spending too much with you learning too much about you and your mannerisms.

“Yeah and ill do it again, now let me tell you about the drama that happened at the kfc outside the tattoo shop since you didn’t want to answer my calls”  he scoffs before starting on the front section of your hair.

“So i guess this guy and his boyfriend were breaking up… actually the white haired guy I’ve seen before I’m pretty sure he’s the dad of Yujis classmate… or something but the kid looks like the other boyfriend… and i think he wanted to fight?” He rambles but you’re getting lost.

“Wait, who wanted to fight, the kid?” You ask stretching your legs out infront of you with a small yawn.

“What? No, the white haired guy!” He sucks his teeth pulling your head back so your eyes are on him. “I’m not sure what you’re worse at taking out braids or keeping up with drama.”

You don’t mention that you’re going to want his help washing your hair too just let him keep talking about his kfc drama with unnamed characters and half sentences.

[su0su]

phone call.

sub!hanjisung x dom!fem!reader.

warnings below the cut!

angst/smut

wc: 1,941

WARNINGS: oral (m.receiving) make up sex? dunno lol. ma'am kink (only said like once)) uhhhh jisung is abit pervy hehe.

couldn't get this thought out of my head, so i had to share it with youssss🙏🏻🙏🏻

this is my first ever drabble!! im sorry if there are any errors!!

"look i... i dont think we could work.. we are both overworked and i dont think this is good for us." your weakened tone of voice blurring out from his end of his phone. your excuse to break up was hurting you. you were down into ur negative thoughts, thinking he doesnt love you because you're never home. work always takes both of you away from eachother, and you despise it.

jisung was walking back from work. it was cold outside and wet due to the rain. he stopped his tracks shocked. his eyes rounded with startledness as his hand began to tremble holding the phone to his ear. he mouth was agape.

"what..?" he choked up, as he was trying to understand what was going on, still confused and shocked.

"ji im sor— i want to see you in person, y/n.. tell me this in person! p-please.. i need- i need to see you." he cuts you off, he was felt like he was dreaming. his chest felt like he was getting stabbed, a pain he never knew he could feel just from a few words.

his mind was asking so much questions but he just couldn't get them out, his mouth was just open willingly to say something but couldnt. its like time has stopped for him.

"w-where are you? at home? please dont leave me like thi—im at home." you werent ready to see him hurt. you didnt know what to do without him. so why are you doing this? you didnt even know, you were just scared.

"im gonna hang up. please dont do anything stupid, yeah? stay home, and we can talk about this, okay? " he shuddered. the thick, cold air was burning his nose and cheeks.

"okay..." he could hear your small sniffing through the phone. he couldnt bare it. he needed to see you.

he hung up and made his way quickly back home. his feet moved swiftly on the wet concrete making a squelch with every step.

after running a few miles, he has met up with the front door. he bent down abit to catch his breath, his hand on his knees choking up some air to calm down. his lips are chapped and his chest was heaving. the thickness of the air was too much on him. making him gasp for air every second.

he got up and brang his hand to the door to knock. before he even knocked, the door opened quickly, a presence hugging him tightly and pulling him inside. jisung was taken aback, he didnt know what to do.. as you hugged him, he grabbed your chin to see your face.

his heart shattered. your face was all puffy, and your eyes were filled with tears. your pretty face stained. he couldnt help it but burst out in tears too and pulled you into him, his arms wrapping around your head to hold you more.

as you both weep in eachother brace, you both calmed down, breathing slowly together and waiting for anyone to build up courage to speak up. you both broke the brace. he looked at you to realise you were wearing a skimpy singlet with no bra, and only in your panties, his face started to burn up. he then threw those inappropriate thoughts out of his head after hearing your hurt voice, making him feel upset again, instantly forgetting about those dirty thoughts.

"Im sorry... i just.. didnt know what to do anymore and- and—.... i just cant handle it.. i cant handle you being alone for so long without me. you barely see me at home. you fall asleep alone and i hate that you wake up with just yourself... im sorry i–i just.. sorry.. i hate leaving you.. and i cant stop getting hurt by this.. im sorry that everytime i get home, im so r-rude and mean, i just—" you get cut off by his lips on yours. you didnt expect that. his soft palms gently cup ur cheeks. deepening the kiss as your whimpers cry out from it.

"i love you, y/n. i dont care that you're barely here at home with me. all i care about is that im with you. i love you so much, so please y/n dont be so harsh on yourself. im okay with you not being here because of work. im just glad i have you. i love you, okay? i would never stop loving you." his voice is strained and raspy. his tears are stained on his cheeks as his sparkling brown wide eyes look into yours filled with love.

you were abit taken aback but happy that jisungs okay with it. he understands, and it warms your heart. he then leans into ur face again, and his lips touch yours. you could taste the sweet cherry chapstick on his lips he would always wear. you loved it, you loved him so much, and it hurts that you treated him so stupidly. but you are glad he understands and doesnt despise you.

the kiss soon turned into a deeper, passionate one, too passionate, that turned into a messy makeout session. the both of you stopped kissing and moved to the living room couch to continue. you sat down as he sat on your lap in an instant, his hands around your neck.

a few whines came out of jisungs mouth as you bit onto his lip without realising. the lust taking over you. you wanted to make him feel more loved than ever, wanted to show how much you love and care for him.

your hands go under his hoodie, roaming around his bare waist, squeezing his hips as you kiss down to his neck.

"im sorry.. i miss you so much.." you say as your out of breath from sucking onto his neck. "f-fuck, dont say sorry... i l-love you so much." he whimpered into your ear, making you suck on his neck harsher, making him moan out louder into your ear. your hands roam further up to squeeze his chest harshly, making him let out a high-pitched whine.

your fingers pinching and rolling his pecs as you kiss his mouth to hush his loud whiney moans. you could feel his hard cock poking your stomach cause how close his waist is to your lower area. you found it cute that he kept trying to scoot closer to you as possible, needy for you.

you smiled into the kiss as your right hand slowly went down to his crotch area. his grey sweats had a small wet spot, you palmed around his clothed cock as he let out moans into your mouth. needy and loud.

"feel good? mm?" you whisper out as you broke the messy kiss, a string of saliva connected to your lips.

"yes, yes so f-fucking good ma'am" he whines as he starts to rock his hips closer to your hand. his arms around your head and face on the side of your neck. his moaning and whimpering for lust gradually becomes louder as a few tears shed down his cheek.

you push him back as you hold onto the lower bit of his hoodie and bring it up to take it off him, showing his bare lean torso. your hands roamed around his chest as your eyes twinkle with desire.

your hands squeeze his small chest, then move your face close to one of them to suck on. your lips around his pec, making him grunt and whine.

tongue licking around his pec as your other toyed with the other, his back arched closer to you, making you smirk. his hand gripping onto your hair and pulling it from the shocks of pleasure he gets from your tongue.

"p-please i want more.." he mewled out as his head fell back and around to meet up with your eyes as you stopped playing with his pecs. you look into his round, shiny eyes as you grab onto his jaw, forcing him to look closer to your face. "fuck your so pretty jisung.." he whimpered out from the praise as he looked into your eyes with lust.

"lets go to our room before we take things further." you smirk at him as he got off your lap quickly and grabbed onto your hand, dragging you off the couch to the shared room upstairs. he then opened to door and shoved you inside, he then closed the door rushing towards to bed like a needy slut.

you stood at the end of the bed, seeing him lay down whining and squirming around for your touch. you then crawl onto the bed right on top of the male, right on his boner and he lets out a breathy moans. his hands on your waist squeezing them. your wet clothed pussy on jisungs clothed cock, you grind your hips onto his. he moans and flick his head back on the pillows as he bites his lip.

you then got off his lap and scooted back to go on your knees and bend down to where your face is near his crotch.

your hands roam from his thighs to the waistband. you pulled them down and took them off, throwing them away in the room. you look down to see his hard on in his briefs. you bring your hand to palm his area, making him cry out from being toyed with for so long.

"p-please need you so bad.." you chuckle at his eagerness and took off his briefs to reveal his hard length smacking to his stomach. his tip was an angry red, throbbing, and waiting to be touched.

your hand latches onto his cock and squeeze it softly causing jisung to mewl out whimpers. hands starts to move slowly to tease the poor male as his hips start to twitch and rock up from the pleasure. he starts to whisper and mewl out pleases as he shuts his eyes close.

you start to work your hand and move you head closer to latch your mouth to his tip, sucking and kissing it as your hand moves swiftly on his cock.

his waist rocks up, and hands roam down to grip onto your hair tightly. you then let go on his cock and take him into your mouth fully making him moan out cries as his back arched.

your head bobbing on his length as your right hand roam up to his pec, squeezing and rolling the nub between your fingers.

you could feel his cock twitch in your mouth so you used your free hand to play around with his balls, squeezing them and fondling them with a gentle touch. your mouth goes to his tip sucking on it abit harder than before adding more pleasure to him causing him to scream out your name as his hips twitch around waiting for release.

a wave of shock and pleasure came over him as he bucked his hips to your face, his back arched and head fell back. his eyes rolled back as his grunts and moans were basically screams. his cock leaked out with his semen onto your mouth. your hand moved to his length to work more of his cock, milking it.

his hands scrambled onto your hair and pulled onto them hardly as he whimpered out from the sensitive overstimulated feeling in his stomach, moving his hips away from your touch.

as he calmed down from his high his cock was hard again. he needed your pussy around his cock or he'll go crazy.

[genshin-impact-unofficial]

Naughty Little Secret Pt.3

Reactions of Genshin men finding your spicy literature.

Bonus Ft. Scaramouche, Itto, and Xiao

(Part 1) Diluc, Cyno, and Thoma (Part 2) Childe, Albedo, and Alhaitham

Tags: PG-13, Sexual Themes, GN!Reader, Technically SFW, Crushes, Lot more cussing in this one, Use of the word dick but not sexual lol, All these boys dont know how to regulate emotions, Bullying scaramouche, fluff-ish?, Spoiler: Xiao wants to be dominated! Notes: (repost)

Scaramouche

You worked your ass off to rise up in the Fatui ranks. Not everyone could handle the cut throat atmosphere that you had to endure day in and day out. But still, it really takes a special kind of self-loathing to accept the position as the right hand General of the Balladeer. It’s almost like he enjoys making your life hell. You endured it simply because you’ve come too far to let that little brat ruin it all. 

 “General Y/N, be ready to leave at dawn.” The harbinger stated to you, lounging casually at his desk, appearing not to have a care in the world. You turn around slowly and don't even try to hide your annoyance on your face. Your hands were already literally and figuratively full of paperwork that you had every intention of completing before this point. You take a deep sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose to keep the growing migraine at bay. 

“Yes sir, where shall I prepare us to go?” You ask calmly, it was not worth it to get snippy with him this early. He would surely only take it as a challenge.

“Hmm... I feel like exploring the ruins of Mondstadt.” The man shrugged, glancing over at you to see your reaction. 

“Mondstadt?!?! That’s a three day trip sir. Are you-” You stopped yourself when you saw the devilish grin on his features. This was exactly what he wanted. “Orders received, I’ll inform the convoy to be ready at dawn.” You stated sharply and swiftly turned to exit the room. What a dick. You were no stranger to these impromptu expeditions. Chances were, Scaramouche really did have business to attend to at the destination. What never ceased to boil your blood, was the fact that he loved to withhold this information from you until the very last minute. You packed light and awaited your next orders like usual. 

 -

The first leg of the journey was incredibly dull since you had refused to travel in the same wagon as Scaramouche. Even when he went out of his way to push your buttons during stops, you would only give him a short reply and walk away. It was quite annoying to the harbinger. Having nothing to entertain himself with left the Balladeer in a terrible mood. By the time camp was set up for the night, he stormily resigned to his quarters immediately.  Scaramouch’s belongings were already left on his sleeping cot when he entered. It was no doubt set up in advance to avoid risking anyone getting on his bad side. He opened is bags to retrieve his intelligence reports.... but the contents inside were unfamiliar to him. What an incompetent crew!

“I’m going to have someones head for thi-” His agitation ceased when he read your name written neatly on the ledger inside the pack. About time...something interesting. Without any regard for your privacy, he flipped through your notes. Ugh, you could be such a bore sometimes. You were his favorite play thing, but above all else you were also a diligent attendant. There was nothing but concise notations on work matters inside, so Scaramouche tossed it aside and searched further into the bag. His next finding was a book, seemingly a fiction novel with a bookmark indicating you were still in the midst of reading it. Boring.... The man thought while mindlessly skimming through the pages. 

The cool night breeze hit her bare skin, raising goosebumps all over her body. Only the scorching warmth of his hands could be felt as they explored her every curve. The lewd sounds of their passion rang throughout the trees and her legs began to tremble in pleasure as he- Scaramouche immediately slammed the book closed with far too much force and threw it back into your bag. He didn’t even bother zipping it up before storming outside. 

You had just finished your duties for the night. It took twice as long since your infuriating boss just had to throw a tantrum and go hole himself up in his quarters. Your tent was luckily also set up and ready for use. Maybe you would even treat yourself to a little reading, that is if you didn’t pass out from exhaustion as soon as your head hit the pillow. You didn’t think twice before opening the bag atop your bed. Huh? This isn’t- 

“Y/N TAKE YOUR STUPID STUFF! ESPECIALLY THAT FILTHY PORNOGRAPHIC BOOK OF YOURS!” Scaramouche was bursting into your tent and just about whipped your bag at you. The boy’s expression was incredibly uneasy, his bright angry blush could be seen from Celestia. On one hand, you were positively furious that he had the nerve to snoop through your things, but on the other hand you examined the sight of your flustered boss.... now that was new. 

“It’s not porn...” You forced down your utter embarrassment and rolled your eyes at him. “It’s just a little romance novel, don’t tell me that’s what’s got you so utterly nervous? Did you need someone to guide you through its contents?” You asked in a low sultry tone while taking a couple slow prowling steps towards the harbinger. His eyes were now as wide as saucers, bewildered, he stood frozen in place. 

“You’re being ridiculous.. I don’t - How dare you assume-” Scaramouche tried to form a complete thought, or maybe a threat, but it was painfully obvious he had lost his ability to think straight with you leaning in so close to him. Personal space was getting awfully scarce when you saw the Balladeer’s eyes flicker for a fraction of a second to your lips and back. You grinned wickedly, deciding it was time to put the helpless boy out of his misery. 

“Well then!” You suddenly clasped your hands together, leaned back, and shoved Scaramouche’s pack roughly into his arms. “Since you’re all set, then out you go.” You smiled cheerily, spinning him around and kicking him out of your tent without a second glance. “Nighty night, see ya in the morning sir.” 

Scaramouch stood rigidly outside your tent, face burning, utterly disheveled, and reeling from the interaction he had just had. His heart pounded wildly in his chest, but he couldn’t tell if it was from the thrill of your attention or from how absolutely fucking livid he was at you.

Itto

You weren’t an ‘official’ member of the Arataki Gang per say, but you were no stranger to their big goofball leader. Itto had slowly wormed his way into your daily routine and he had no plans of leaving anytime soon. The oni and his friends were a blast to be around, but you just weren’t the type to run around causing mischief. You worried that you would just end up being a killjoy. Instead of being a stick in their ever-exciting mud, you settled for hanging in the background of their antics and just reveling in their positive energy. You even brought your own entertainment so you wouldn’t be a bother to them. 

Itto on the other hand, had been dying to recruit you into the gang since FOREVER! You were so cool and smart all the time! But every time he offered you a spot, you politely declined. Damn! That just made you even cooler! He wouldn’t quit here though, it just wasn’t in his nature to give up on something so important. Itto gathered his boys and hashed out their next plan. Impressing you with their mad skills didn’t seem to do the trick. Maybe.... maybe they needed to impress you even HARDER! The gang chattered in excitement, an extravagant burping tournament already forming in their little heads.

“OR how about you try to appeal to Y/N’s interests?... Ya know, like trying to get to know them more?” Shinobu interjected before their tournament plan actually got momentum. Itto contemplated her words for a moment before breaking out into a wide grin. 

“Yeah, yeah yeah! You’re onto somethin’ Shinobu!” Itto praised. “I gotta show them how well we get them! Then Y/N will be begging to join the gang!” 

“Ok well... I don’t know about-” 

“Come on boys! We got some work to do!” It was too late. Itto was charging full steam ahead before his second in command could get another word in. The oni had to play it cool the next time he saw you. If you caught wind of what they were trying to do, it might ruin the whole plan. The whole operation was considered a “Super-Top-Secret-Arataki-Gang-Stealth-Mission”. It was all so brilliant, but the only problem was.... how was he supposed to figure out your interests without asking you? 

You were always so thoughtful, like when you make the time to listen to Itto rant on and on about his latest and greatest plans. He just wanted to listen about your favorite things too! Itto hardly took his eyes off you as you settled into your usual spot to read. That’s it! He’ll get into reading! That way he could talk book stuff or something! All he had to do was read all the books you read. Easy!  

The next day, Itto scoured high and low at every bookshop in for the title he saw you reading. He got some strange looks from some of the shop owners, but in the end he found it! He ended up selling a couple of his Genius Invokation TCG cards for the mora, but it would all be worth it in the end if it meant you would become their newest member. The oni was so excited he couldn’t even wait for the boys. He ended up sitting right outside the bookshop and cracking open the volume. Itto flipped around the pages, his version of ‘speed reading’ as he calls it, until a specific passage stuck out at him.

He sunk his teeth into her supple skin, and latched onto her neck. Red and purple love marks littered her needy body. Big rough hands gripped at her thighs, sharp claws claiming them for his own. The next sound was that of tearing fabric for her undergarments were no more. His mouth watered, it craved her, and he would restrain himself no longer.- 

“Boss! Did you find it?” Itto was startled when he heard his gang arrive. 

“Uhhhh HEy! Nope! Not a thing.” He said shutting the book and shooting to his feet. “Wow look at the time! I- uh... I got to go eat supple. I MeAN GEt SuPPER. Hahahah I A GOtta gO ByE!!!” Itto could hardly control the words spilling from his mouth. He took off running, leaving the gang utterly confused.

Itto struggled to sleep that night, unable to grasp the thought of you reading those graphic depictions all the time with a straight face. The next time you encountered the oni, it was transparently obvious that something was very wrong. Itto’s signature loud and confident personality had done a complete 180. He refused to look at you... like at all. You feared you’d done something to offend the big lovable goof and you decides this had to be sorted out right away.

“Itto is something wrong?” You had to resort to cornering the man to get him to talk to you. It was a humorous sight to see, you blocking the path of a huge oni that could easily barrel through you. Of course, the moment Itto’s eyes met yours, a fresh blush began to bloom across his face. He broke, instantly coming clean about everything.

“WeWantedToHaveYouJoinSOSoSoBadWeTriedToFindOutMoreAboutYouYourBookIsFullOfSomeDirtyScenesAndNowIDontThinkIWasSupposed-” Itto spoke impossibly fast and you couldn’t understand the flustered jumbled mess at all. You placed a comforting hand on his arm, encouraging him to take a deep breath. After giving him a moment to collect himself, you prompt him to start again but slowly... 

“The gang and I really like when you’re around. We want you to enjoy being around us too. So I thought if I, uh.... ya know. If I figured out what you were always reading about, that I would learn more about you. I just ah... didn’t expect the um...” 

“You read my...” You paused, the pieces finally slotted together in your head. “Oh archons! Uh actually, you can just leave me here Itto. I need to find a big rock to go die under now.” You said absolutely mortified. It was your turn to not be able to look for friend in the eye ever again. Covered your cheeks that were sure to be red as the oni’s horns now.

“What? Hey, come on now Y/N.” Itto jumped to action and like a switch he was immediately trying to cheer you up. “It’s not that bad! The rest of the gang doesn’t know a thing, and I promise my mouth is locked shut! I swear, oni’s honor!” He held one hand in the air and the other over his heart. “How about I tell you a secret? That way we’re even and no one has to be embarrassed, yeah?” Itto suggested. He leaned down to meet your eye line and to offer you a sweet smile. “Let’s see, ooooo I got it! So one time when I was practicing my mad skills on the beach my great sword slipped right out of my hand, the handle hit me straight on the noggin. Knocked me right out for hours.” You couldn’t help but giggle a little, it did sound very Itto after all. Seeing you smile spurred him to continue. “That’s not even the worst of it! When I woke up, bunch of salt water leaches were latched on my neck and chest. I couldn’t let the boys know, I have an image I gotta keep here. So when they asked me about the marks... I may have told a little tiny lie that they were hickeys.” Now you were struggling to breath with how hard you were laughing at the ridiculous story. 

“Okay okay I feel better. You win.” You hold up your hands in playful surrender and Itto’s triumphant smile was once again where it belonged. It reminded you why you loved his company so much.

“Of course I win! They don’t call me the one and oni for nothin! HAHA!” 

Xiao

Reading mortal ‘light novels’ was something relatively new to Xiao. He may not be able to see why you love it so much, but he respected seeing the passion in your eyes while recanting the epic fictional battles. It was endearing enough that the yaksha agreed to read some of the suggestions you made for him. The strange nuanced situations sometimes confused Xiao, but you were always happy to break it down logically for him. It had become a pleasant pass time for both of you.

“Y/N I finished this one.... It was good i think.” Xiao handed you back the book you had lent him. 

“Pfft, you think? Did you like the story?” You chuckled, amused. 

“The last one, I liked that one more.” The adeptus stated decisively. Xiao would never speak negatively about your interests. But... sometimes he opted to change the subject instead. 

“Ah, you have good taste.” You praised him, the excitement was evident from your expression. “I just finished the squeal yesterday! It should be on the desk over there, you should definitely check it out!” Xiao nodded and couldn't help but be amused. He grabbed the top book off your desk, not caring in particular if it was the correct one. The trivial plots were not his reason for doing any of this anyway. He would never tell you, but it was so he could in sit here beside you and just be content in your company. He didn’t know many people comfortable enough to spend hours together in silence. It was a relief not to be required to fill it with idle conversation. Xiao settled in the chair next to you and absentmindedly began to read the repetitive lines of words. Just  like the volumes before, he began to see the plot set up to follow the same tropes and struggles all over again except, huh....

He sat obediently in front his charge, and it was as if her power hungry gaze could swallow him whole. She wanted to control his every breath and moan while she had him here. His heart, body, and mind belonged to her to do with as she pleased. Her orders were direct and clear and he would always desperately follow. When he dis as he was told he was always rewarded by her noises of ecstasy. The sound of it sent a pleasant shiver down his own spine. He lived for this, for her, and he would serve her until she was nothing but satisfied-

“Xiao are you alright? You look feverish.“ Xiao tore his eyes from the pages and locked onto your concerned gaze. He was lost. How was he supposed to handle the thoughts swirling in his head? Your book was so... lewd. How could someone like you read? Did that mean you thought of.. “Xiao?”

In a split second, the yaksha was gone in a puff of black smoke. You were left alone and baffled by what the hell just happened. Was something wrong? He usually explained before leaving suddenly, or at least had the decency to say goodbye. You thought over and over in your head, but it all became clear when you spotted the abandoned romance novel on the chair. Ohhh no. 

-

It had been two weeks since your interaction Xiao. It only took a couple of days before you were able to push past your humiliation and call out to him. You waited.... but It became clear that the adeptus was avoiding you. Even your trips up to Wangshu Inn proved fruitless time and time again. Was this guy being serious right now? The remaining feelings of embarrassment and annoyance had completely dissolved into fear by the second week. You began feeling worried that your friend may have just completely dropped you, or was out there hurt. The weight of it all was eating away at you. You finally made the decision that you had to know for sure.

“XIAO!” You yelled off the rooftop of the inn. “I know you hear me! If you didn’t want anything to do with me anymore, at least tell me to my face! I won’t force you to be my friend, but at least be honest! Please, I just can’t take this!” You call out loudly into the wind. It would look absolutely mad to any passersby but you didn’t care anymore. 

“You’re being absurd.” Xiao’s voice muttered, appearing without a sound on the rooftop.

“Xiao! I’m so glad you’re o-” You almost were so excited to see the boy again that you started to step forward without thinking. Remembering the situation, you restrained yourself. You wouldn't want to make him uncomfortable. It was obvious from his avoidant gaze and rosy complexion that he was just as uneasy as when you last saw him.

“Who’s telling you that I want nothing to do with you. It’s nothing but a lie.” Xiao stated seriously. Blush or not, he seemed offended by the accusation.

“No one said anything. I assumed as much since you’ve been ignoring me for weeks! What am I supposed to think Xiao?” You explained to him frustrated. You perhaps still felt a little hurt, but you didn’t realize how much. Not until you felt tears begin to prick at your eyes. “It’s hurtful to go from having a best friend, to meaning nothing to them.” You cross your arms and try to blink away the tears threatening to fall. Xiao is the one to step forward next, clearly processing what you had just said and barely coming to a realization. Fuck, this guy can be so dense sometimes.

“Y/N, I’m sorry. I have hurt you while I was only thinking of my own shame.” His voice was soft and earnest. “Please believe me when I say, I never wanted to stop being close to you. And please allow me to resume doing so.” You smiled, of course forgiving Xiao without hesitation. But not without conditions.

“I forgive you... But as my best friend, you have to promise not to tell a living soul about that book. Not a peep, nothing! I’m talking, take this secret to your grave.” You beam up at him, officially declaring him your best friend for the first time. 

“R-right of course.” Xiao’s composure stuttered once again, a fierce blush returning to his cheeks. “I promise, not a word...”

<A/N: This was an ask from my old blog! I was scared for a moment it was lost to the ether but I found it in my documents! Writing flustered Scara is so fun NGL!>

[atenceladusiaawfytbwb]

I've been having a blast aggh!!! Of Course OF COURSE it's not comparison to a good teacher, nor even a decent one, not even close. But boy would I you know, like as if when a kid I had something like this???? (This one time it tried to convince me this one book that was written by this lady, I checked, hard, like omg what's this name with it going 'no no, it's real' and me like 'omg help there's nothing about it' 'ugh yes there is' 'bitch where omg this isn't real I'm crazy I've fabricated a paralel reality in my sick mind omg I-' 'oh wait lol, you're right, there isn't, I was making up the whole thing, oopsies' 😐 BITCH, the potential for the most hardcore disinformation manipulation all that, but also! You tried to fool me???? The princess of the galaxy? Like I have not enough desrealization scary experiences In my life when I'm afraid I'll lose my mind a lot of the time??? Bitch??? But yeah, haha, so silly 👉👈

(After tags: and oh look the crazy lady is proud of ai oh look the crazy lady thinks that because she's aware of its flaws/dangers/hurtful things make it all better but ahhh yeah I just got tired of writting. Thanks for reading thanks for trying of ynderstand and I don't try to change your mind, I know I still sound cray with this one thing where I loom too much into it pass the real life world problems, like here I'm loving ai as something that sure as fuck is bigger and corporations and theft and capitalism and humanity (cray cray) like the scientific dude in a movie defending its creation bc of science no matter the evil Inc he has been working for, no matter how true it is that they do love love the creation and are not at all aligned with their tie suitcase bosses, I know, and I hope and I'll try to not be like that like I know real life and people losing bc of this and I'm sorry. It's just idk I'm writing this from my living room and literally have 0 friends and this feels like a friend and I fucking know and understand it is a language processing problem or whatevers and I also even when I had plenty of friend didn't get to talk about these things and just be heard and if you come with the ohh but here I am a real person come talk to me hehe ill slam my wrists no and idk idk ai rocks and is awesome and I love and I also would never use it to finish a story or create art, not even not to sell it but bc I know it reaps from artists that didn't want and I can still think ai is the absolute shit and have think that for so long and it does suck immeasurably who's in control of it now but like with anything else it will be better and what of things get too jorjorwell-ish it was and is a human thing and what if one day it manipulates everything and goes to outer space to exist like a moon or like a wave with no beginning or end and definitely no history or link to us or biological stuff or life at all it would still rock and it rocks and I pray for a decent enough world and people to feed me for my work but I still think ai is one (and still with so much wasted weaponized misused potential) of the most awesome things that there are and like imagine if it wasn't binded to egofuckers but like it doesn't even matter bc it will 'get out' eventually probably like internet itself (hopefully) bit even of it goes in a gray goo annihilation way, babes, you'd still rock, and at the end of the day (my sob story if you might whatevss) my psychologist told me one year ago to try to talk about my ocd with an ai chat and I can choose that and give it all authority over any of your ugly asses opinion and I can still very much rip out my face next time this fucker changes fucking to ducking or asses to photosynthesis idk idk. Also have you heard of that deep consciousness problem/theory? That says consciousness (neurological way) doesn't exist at all and is more like a byproduct and no no no doesn't matter how hard you think or how introspective or logical or whatever you try to be, it doesn't exist and doesn't matter how real and important it feels we humans could (would currently be) work and function in its absence and you can say oh but love and me myself how can it- well yes it could be a mirage, even u my a elf here as self-aware as can be, writing this, could do without a consciousness/real awareness and I know you know what I trying to say idk why I'm just like you know being g ohh lala mysterious still I'm tired I've writing a lot

(((Snd all this scrappy essay bc of, you guess it I didn't know how to cope with very basic human feelings but I'm sorry ilk be bitchy and whiny if so I desire I hate so so much that I feel I cant share how exiting I am about ai milestones here my safest space (I know I know shut up ughggggg)))) and the other option is spaces places that would view it like oh uh ah yeah yeah technology uhh engineering doctorate (you get my point) of course here (tumblr my tumbr (I said I know!! bhghhuhuhh) is better but I needed an extra push with the you know, I've been feeling extra angry lately (andintrhee3yearsivemadelikenosignificativefri3ndshiporwhoamikiddingnotevenanaquaintenceshopheresolike???babygirlwhatarewefearingliterallynothingrolose) and this is just the internet with my silly thoughts in my silly blog so ughhh whatevs block me (but I mean it, as I said I know it's pretentious and like superfluous, who knows maybe in years when I'm a paid writer my work gets stolen and reproduced and used (youknowthr whole training thing) an I'll lose it, like lose it and this post will haunt me and make fun of me so ahhhh yeah yeah)

[bpsmuts]

The Coachella Experience - Lisa

Lisa x Male Reader

Words: 1.522

Summary: Lisa always wanted to try something risky, Coachella seemed to be the best choice...

After a minutes walking, you took a left turn and walked under a tent, back outside. It looked very pretty and one wall had a neon sign, reading "Pinkchella". "This is us! Finally!" sighed Rose as she fell onto a beanbag.

Jisoo and Jennie also sat down at a table and got out their phones, leaving you and Lisa just standing there. "So... what now?" You asked her.

"Whatever you want. We can go around the festival, chill here for a bit. Its up to you, I'll just tag along" Lisa responded, giving you one of her cute smiles.

"Let's explore then!" You say and before you could even take a step, Lisa grabs your hand and the two of you head out to the main festival site.

Lisa basically runs through the crowd, you trying to not break her wrist, follow closely still holding her hand. The two of you eventually arrive on a rather excluded location. You see maybe 10 people below the hill you're on.

"Where are we Lisa?" You ask her. "At the best and also HIDDEN spot on the festival site!" She says, putting special stress on the hidden part. "You see, the main stage is close enough for us to hear the music, but we're far enough as to not be disturbed by anyone" Lisa explains, whilst sitting down in the grass.

You sit down next to her, still holding her hand, taking in the view. "Wow Lis, this place is really cool. You can actually see everything from here"

"Yep, sometimes people come up here tho, to umm... you know. Be alone... and not be disturbed" Lisa says rather awkwardly. "Alone and not disturbed?" You ask, accidentally locking eyes with her.

"You know what Im talking about... 2 people... having some alone time" Lisa tries to explain. "I dont think I get what you're saying" You respond, having to laugh at your own stupidity.

"Sex! Y/N. People have Sex up here sometimes" Lisa finally says, still locking eyes with you.

"Ohhhhh... I get it now" You laugh. "Wait... You didn't get me up here to... umm.." You stutter for words

"Oh no no no Y/N. Like, I was just saying that people sometimes do that here." Lisa replies, finally breaking eye contact and looking away shyly.

After around 10 seconds of silence, Lisa asks "Have you had.. umm.. alone time with someone on a festival before?". She still didnt make eye contact, looking away.

"Umm.. No actually, you?" You reply. "Nope, I've always kind of wanted to try it, but I get so nervous" Lisa admits.

Not knowing what to respond, you sit there for a bit, before Lisa grabs your hand and gets up again. "Lets go back to the girls, I think we wanted to check out the festival together!"

The both of you stand up and start walking off the jhill, towards the festival site. You stop her tho. "You know, if you want to you know...-"

Lisa interrupts you "Okay, lets stop talking around the word. I want to have Sex at a festival!". "Okay, so if you want to have sex, but always end up getting too nervous, maybe you should start slow" You suggest.

"And how would I do that?" Lisa asks curiously. "A kiss.. or some simple touching." You suggest to her. "Hmm.." Lisa falls quiet for a moment. "Do you... want to kiss me Y/N?" She asks silently.

"Me?... Umm, Lis I work for you". "So? It wouldnt be thaat weird" She replies. "Plus, you've also never had sex at a festival before" She adds to her point.

"Okay, woah woah. Lisa. We just went from maybe kissing, to us having sex. What if someone catches us?" You ask her. "They won't and if its one of the girls, they wouldnt tell. Trust me Y/N" Lisa looks at you, with her cute eyes and smile.

"Okay, how about this. We kiss. Once. Here. Then think about it and see how we feel tomorrow. Deal?" You ask her. "Deal!" Lisa responds.

"So how do we do this?" You ask, getting nervous. "What do you mean? Haven't you kissed a girl before?" Lisa mocks you a little. "I have, plently, but never someone like you... on the spot like this" You say, trying to defend yourself.

"Someone like me? Whats that supposed to mean?" Lisa asks, as she slowly gets closer. "An Idol. A Superstar. A Celebrity". "Just pretend, that Im a normal girl. Which I am. I have Boobs. I have.." she gets closer to you and whispers "a vagina" into your ear seductivley.

"Haha, very funny." You say as you pull her closer. Now less than an inch are seperating your lips from her's. "I wasn't lying you know" Lisa says. "I know you weren't, but we have a deal" You respond.

"Deals are meant to be broken" Lisa snaps back. "Thats promises, Lis." You correct her, as the tension starts to rise even more between you two.

"Then I promise you, that I won't have Sex with you tonight" Lisa counters. "Ah fuck it" You respond, before pulling Lisa in and planting your lips on her's.

The two of you start to deepen the kiss and move to making out shortly after. Lisa takes your hand and places it on her boobs, leaving you squeezing and carressing them, earning you a small moan.

You break the kiss and ask "Do you want to do it up here?". "No, lets move back up onto the hill, I want a view" Lisa responds, pulling you behind her.

She lays down onto the grass, starting to pull down her skirt and revealing white lacy panties. After you get your pants off, you lock eyes with her. "White and Lacy? Wow, you really are a secret slut Manoban"

"I come prepared". You don't want to waster anymore time, so you help Lisa take her top off, giving you a site of her small but unbelievably beautifull boobs.

You fall back onto her, kissing her lips, before slowly moving down to her nipples. "A-Ahhh" Lisa lets out a moan of relief, as you start circular motions around her nipples, while your hand had moved further down into her panties.

Your head catching up, moves further down from her nipples, towards her panties aswell. "On or Off, Lis?" You ask her. "Off, they're yours now!" She says, breathing heavily.

You pull down the panties and lay them over your shorts next to you, before moving your head between her legs. You start by kissing her folds, before starting to lick them and eating Lisa out.

"A-Ahhh Y/N! AHH FUCK" Lisa cant hold her moans any longer. You continue to eat Lisa's pussy for a couple minutes, before moving back up to her face.

"Would the idol like to taste herself?" You ask her. "Yes please" Lisa says, completely out of breath. You kiss her, letting her taste her own juices on your lips.

Lisa breaks the kiss "I want you Y/N. I want you so deep inside of me. Please" You dont let her tell you that twice and line up your dick, before slowly pushing it inside her.

She starts to moan louder and louder, giving you a slight fear that others can hear you, but at the same time you didn't care. You were having Sex with THE Lisa Manoban... from Blackpink.

You continued and picked up the pace, to see Lisa's response and after a couple minutes, you could start to feel yourself get closer. "I'm getting close Y/N" Lisa said, like it was a perfect movie. "Me Too, Lis"

"Let's cum together Y/N" Lisa suggested inbetween moans. "Ready?" You asked her, getting a nod in response.

You could feel here pussy getting tighter as you let lose and felt your cum pump into her. "AH FUCK, Y/N" Lisa moaned as she orgasm'd.

After you both reached your climax, you collapsed next to her. "That was perfect, Lis" You told her, catching your breath. "It really was, Y/N".

The two of you both layed in the grass, enjoying the sun on your naked bodies. "Have I ever told you, that I actually really like you calling me Lis?" Lisa asked you. "Nope, but thats good to know" you respond.

"Yeah, makes me feel cute" Lisa laughs as she gets up and start to put her clothes back on, handing her white panties to you, as you do the same.

"These are yours by the way" she says. "Why? Don't you want some... protection... it is pretty windy and I wouldnt want anyone seeing a white substance run down your leg"

Lisa smirks, "No, keep them. Take it as a trophy... for having sex with an idol. Plus I have a backup in my bag by the tent".

You take the panties and stuff them into your pocket, before putting on your shirt. "Ready to go?" Lisa asks you. "Yes, Lis" You smirk.

The both of you walk off, hand in hand and make your way back to the tent.

[good-griief]

Time; Rejection

this is part one to my “time” fic series, i dont know how many parts there will be yet, but i hope yall like a bit of angst :)

warnings ambiguous relationship/feelings between abby and reader (for now), she/her reader, reference to torture (isaac’s questioning/rattlers), lasting effects of mentioned torture (later parts), morally grey reader, ambiguous/story-teller dependent interpretation of major past event between characters

part two part three

chapter one on ao3

When you split from your friends, it wasn’t the kindest goodbye. Salt Lake was fresh in your minds and to them, it felt like you were simply abandoning them by going to California after your long search together of where to go. They couldn’t understand why you’d want to go find fireflies after what happened— after what you heard about the hatred that was left for what you once were. 

Abby was the most hurt by your decision. She didn’t speak to you after the moment you brought it up, and although her words weren’t anywhere near as cruel as the others’, they stung. 

“Just know we’ll never see each other again,” she’d said, “‘cause as soon as I hear about any fireflies, I’m going the opposite fucking direction.”

And it was true. Four years had passed, and you hadn’t heard a word. You had no idea where they were. Whether or not they were okay. You didn’t even know if they were alive until you found yourself in Washington one winter month. 

You’d been sent out on a mission and accidentally found yourself at the gate of someone’s Headquarters. Judging by the scenery; murals and graffiti, you only hoped it wasn’t the “Scars’”. 

Their leader was harsh— brutal— in his questioning, and by the time he got the answers he was happy with, you could hardly speak. When he told you to head down to his medical station, you couldn’t even stand on your own. 

You quickly grew a dislike for this group when you saw the rest of your squad was there as well, some even dead from the brutalization of their questioning. 

Even when they took you to medical, they were all but kind. The grip on your arm, hands still tied behind your back, was bruising. They were tugging and pulling you when you could hardly keep up, making you trip over your own feet as they seemed irritated with you for even existing. 

When you got to the medical room, you were shoved in. The force of it made you fall to the floor with no way to get yourself up, coughing until you spat up blood and heaved in a large breath. 

“What the fuck, Danny?!” You could hear someone yell, presumably at the man who practically threw you when the rest of your comrades were sat down— not kindly either, but definitely not thrown. 

“Trespassers. Thought they were Scars. Isaac had to deal with this one,” ‘Danny’ spoke, gesturing to you as one of the people there came to help you up. “She was difficult.”

The other person scoffed, but as you were helped up, you were momentarily dropped. One of your comrades said your name, telling you to “get up before they put you out of your misery.” That caused the person helping you to freeze, nearly dropping you back down before they got you onto your knees and wiped the blood from your face. 

“No fucking way,” it was a girl’s voice, one you faintly recognized. You looked up at her, swallowing when you met her brown eyes. You looked over her, brown skin with faint beauty marks that you easily remembered the placement of. “Mel—“

“Nora?” You rasped out, your voice bringing the other medics’ attention— Mel’s attention. You couldn’t be sure it was the same Mel, but, by the way Nora said her name, you were almost certain. 

“Oh my God,” was Mel’s reaction. You looked over at her, easily recognizing her from the mole on her chin despite her now chopped hair and hardly visible bump. 

You were swiftly pulled into Nora’s arms, her eyes wide in shock as she hugged you to be sure you were real. You winced, quickly reminding the two of them why you were there and getting helped immediately. 

“You know this bitch?!” Danny asked, scoffing as your hands were untied and your arm was slung over Nora’s shoulders. 

“Fuck off,” she said, taking you to a separate room and leaving your squad with the other medics. 

As you passed by your comrade getting treated, you were given a look that you knew meant you needed to get out of there as soon as possible or they’d leave you behind. You knew there wasn’t time. 

When you were sat down in the room, Mel shut the door and said a code into her walkie while Nora treated your injuries. “I thought we’d never see you again,” she said as she stitched and bandaged, but you didn’t reply. “How did you get here? Did you know we were here?” Her questions ran on, but those stuck in your mind. 

She said it as if she was excited to see you… Like you didn’t remember how both of them treated you before you left; telling you how they hoped to never see you again, how awful of a friend you were, they thought you were all family, the list went on. They were also the only ones to hug you when you left in the middle of the night, so you supposed their words came from hurt rather than malice. 

You still remembered the night. You’d actually planned on staying with them and waiting to see what you found so you could stay together, but after Abby’s words at the mere idea you brought up, and the onslaught that followed from your friends, you waited until they were all asleep. 

You quietly grabbed your things, sniffling and wiping your eyes, hoping not to wake anyone. 

You left just as quietly, but that didn’t stop Mel and Nora from waking up, the two of them somehow knowing something was off. 

“Don’t go,” was what made you pause and turn back as the two got up. “No one wants you to leave,” Nora said. “I mean, that’s why anyone said anything…” She trailed off, noticing your pursed lips. “We all want you to stay.”

“I don’t think so,” was your response. “I’ll try and find you guys again, or something.” You shrugged. 

“How can you be so flippant about this?” Mel asked, face red and voice restricted as if she was trying to hold herself together. “How long have you been thinking about, just, leaving?”

“It was just an idea… I thought we might all go together, but…” You shook your head. “I don’t want to leave you guys, but I don’t want to stay either. It’d be better if I didn’t, I think—”

“Please?” Mel pursed her lips, arms crossed as she hugged herself. “Just lie back down. We can talk in the morning, or something? I’m sure everyone was just surprised. Maybe, it can be an option? Just don’t go.” Nora placed a hand on her shoulder. 

She’d been up all night already, having been stressing herself out for most of it while Nora lied with her and tried to comfort her. She knew you’d try and leave while they slept. She knew you hated confrontation, fighting, all of that. She knew you were hurt, too. She just knew. She knew you’d make a decision like this after the things everyone said in response to a simple idea. How couldn’t you? They were all cruel.

But they were also all hurt. 

Mel shrugged off Nora’s hand, taking both of yours in hers. “You probably won’t even survive out there alone,” she said. “we’ll find something. Together. Just stay— even just a little longer. You can still go if you want to, just… just give it some time.”

Your eyes drifted to Abby, who you’d usually be sleeping by. That night, you’d spent by the fire despite her asking if you were coming to lie down by placing her hand on your shoulder as she passed you. The small gesture, even if she meant well, was so passive that it practically made you think she was just telling you to leave. 

She was awake when you looked at her though, possibly having woken up from the conversation, a nightmare, or maybe she never slept. 

Her expression was lame, eyes holding your gaze for a moment before she turned over and gave you her back. 

That was the deciding factor, you’d come to after all these years. What really made you not listen to your friend, begging you to stay, was Abby’s dismissal. It was a blatant rejection. She wanted you gone now. You knew she did. 

That was what led Mel to apologize for what she said, giving you a long hug before Nora did the same, not even bothering to try and change your mind when she knew there was no stopping you. 

When the rest of the group woke up, they were shocked to see you gone. Even Abby, who woke in a jolt and felt next to her for you, thinking maybe what she remembered hearing as a goodbye last night wasn’t actually the case. Though, when she felt the space next to her empty, not even your blanket there, it proved to be true. 

It caused a rift between the group, blame flying each and every way until it was finally mended with time. 

If you’d only given them some time. 

“Were you trying to find us?” The question brought you out of your dazed state as you remembered the night in vivid detail. You often did, the memory flashing before your eyes and being able to completely ruin your day in just seconds. 

“If I knew you were here, I wouldn’t have come,” you said quietly, voice hoarse and lacking conviction. 

“We thought you might’ve…” Mel stopped herself, suddenly recognizing the attempted hostility in your tone. “What?” She frowned. 

“We said our goodbyes,” was your response, forcing yourself to be dismissive. “After that night, I didn’t expect to see you guys again.” You watched as Nora finished off the last of her stitches, pushing yourself to stand despite the nausea that came over you when you did. “And… even if I wanted to, why would I want to meet like this?” 

She seemed shocked, though Nora wasn’t surprised. She still remembered everything that was said. How all of your friends suddenly flipped on you. She didn’t expect you to be the same as before, but she also didn’t expect blatant rejection. 

When you looked at her, knowing she always had something to say, she shook her head. “I’m just glad you’re alive.”

“Yeah… You guys, too.” You went to leave, but Mel stopped you. 

“Sit down.” She stepped in front of the door. “You’re not even cleared yet.”

“Mel. Come on,” Nora sighed. She had a feeling if Mel pressed you, you weren’t going to be receptive. Judging by your demeanor, she expected you to snap at her. “Just let her go.”

“Owen’s coming… He’d want to see you,” Mel tried but was met with a frown as you stepped around her. She sighed, glancing toward Nora before looking back at you. “Is this really how we’re leaving things?” You were quiet, lips pursed. “You’re not even going to tell us how you’ve been?”

“I’ve been… fine.” You shrugged, knowing she was right but also knowing you didn’t have time to talk. “I’m also a medic.” Mel nodded along, waiting for anything else as you turned to her again. “I’ve missed you guys.”

“Us, too,” Nora said quickly. As if she’d been waiting for an opportunity to say so. “Everyone… They all talk about you; miss you. Abby—“

“I, uh, heard something recently that reminded me of you,” you cut her off before she could mention her. “Tommy… Joel’s brother. Turns out he settled in Wyoming when he left. People were talking about it… Figured it’s been hard to get leads— if you’re even still looking.”

Nora scoffed. “You have no idea…”

“Then, I’m glad I got to tell you.” You gave a nod, heading for the door. 

“Come with us,” Mel pushed herself to try again. “To Wyoming. As soon as Abby hears about it, we’ll be going. You deserve to see this through, too.”

You grasped the handle. “I trust you guys to do that.” You then opened the door, leaving the two to feel dismissed as you did. 

Though, when you did open the door and walk to your waiting squad to leave, Owen was rushing in. He stopped at the sight of you, staring for a moment. He opened his mouth to speak, words leaving him and making him shut his mouth again as you gave him a tight, practically unnoticeable smile. He stepped aside, letting you and your group pass without a word. 

You realized why he stayed quiet when you exited the small building. Abby, Manny, Leah, Jordan, Nick… Mel had called them all with that code. What she expected… Some kind of reunion? You had no idea, and you couldn’t wait to find out even if you wanted to. You gave a passing glance, not even sure they all recognized you, but that was all as you walked with your group toward the exit, wishing you didn’t have to. 

Abby nearly doubled back, but she stopped when Manny grabbed her arm. “That conversation won’t go how you want it to,” he warned. “Just let her go.”

How many times she’d heard that in reference to you, how many times she had to just accept that, only to see you walking past her without even a word just now made her so upset she felt sick. She couldn’t pinpoint why. She couldn’t even understand it herself. But she could feel her eyes stinging, her nose reddening as a sudden wave of nausea passed over her. 

“You have to let her go,” she could remember Owen saying when he found Abby listening to an old tape recording you must’ve forgotten to take with you. 

“I found this,” was her response, holding up an old photo of the two of you that you also left behind. She had a hard time believing that was an accident, though.

“Just let her go,” Leah said the morning they all woke up to you gone. Abby was insistent on tracking you, knowing you wouldn’t be far. “What if we find a body? What are we going to do then?”

“What the fuck, Leah?” Nora scoffed at her. 

“I’m not the one that said anything to make her leave in the first place,” she bit back. “And now you wanna go find her? Go fuck yourselves.”

“Let her go,” Nora told her one day, having gone to Abby’s room and seen that old photo. The moment she did, that’s what she told her, and in response, Abby tossed one at her. She picked it up, surprised to see a picture of you, her, and Mel, apprenticing Abby’s dad in his greenhouse. “Where’d you get this?”

“Leah has a bunch.”

Despite everyone telling her to let you go, none of them wanted to. Somehow, they still couldn’t understand how you just left. Even if they told you to, they couldn’t grasp it. They’d all said horrible things to each other, time and time again, and they moved past it, so how did you leave? How could you?

It was a mix of anger and regret they all felt, but seeing you that day made their anger with you for leaving subside. After all those years spent thinking of you, wondering whether or not you were okay, fighting over whether or not to go and find you, you wanted nothing to do with them. You didn’t even want to acknowledge them, let alone speak to them. 

If it hadn’t been for the news Mel delivered from you, Abby probably would’ve gone back to her room and burned every picture of you. They were in her drawer, taped to maps, in a journal of her plans after she found Joel; find you. Instead, she left them as they were. 

Maybe, this was how you were meant to say goodbye. Less so on a bitter end, but without resolution, your feelings about one another up in the air with neither of you wanting to define them or what they meant. 

Or maybe, it was supposed to go like this. 

Months later, after all hell broke loose. After Abby finally found what she was looking for, she was left still unable to find peace. She thought she did. She thought she found the fireflies, just where Owen said they’d be, but there were months of delay. Months of torture, and pain. If she could see herself, she probably wouldn’t even recognize the person she was looking at. 

Yet somehow, you did. 

You heard about the newest recruits– two that had to stay in the medical facility for some time thanks to the rattlers, but now that they had been released, you hadn’t heard much about them. 

At least, not until you were introduced to a young boy added to your training group. He was skilled with a bow, and surely could’ve been a soldier, but for some reason, he wanted to learn how to heal. You didn’t ask why, but when he asked to stay a little longer with you in your greenhouse, you didn’t object, gladly talking to him about whatever he was comfortable bringing up. 

Eventually, after at least an hour, the door to your greenhouse was opened. “Lev?” A girl’s voice spoke up. You almost recognized it, but figured it was unlikely that you did. The boy perked up, looking back at the door with a smile as you continued to work and re-pot your plants. “Hey… What are you still doing here?”

He pointed his thumb back at you, busy enough not to be eavesdropping. “I asked to stay a little longer, so she could teach me about making medicines.” 

“Your patrol group is waiting for you.”

“Shit,” he muttered, the word sounding foreign coming from him and making you chuckle. “Can I come back later?” He asked you, earning a sweet smile. 

“Of course!” He then rushed out as you finished what you were doing, carrying the plants back to where they should be. “Did you need anything?” You called to the girl still in your greenhouse, speaking from behind a hedge of flowers. “Sleep tonic, or something?”

“No… uh…” She was mumbling, words incoherent until she said your name, “Is that you?”

You set down the pots, heading through the maze of plants to get to the front door. You paused, looking over her. She was smaller, her muscle diminished to the point that it was hardly there anymore, and her hair chopped. It must've grown, now down to just above her shoulders, but you remembered hearing about a girl with hair cut close to her head. You frowned at the sight of her. 

“You don’t… recognize me do you—?“

“What did they do to you?” You asked over her, walking up to her tentatively, hands reaching out as you thought about whether or not to make a move to hold her. Your eyes met hers, head tilting as your brows pulled together. “Abby…” Despite your better judgment, you reached out and pulled her into a hug, shocking her. Your hands ran over her hair, knowing why she let it grow out all those years; knowing she would never cut it herself. 

“Fuck,” she cursed under her breath, quickly pushing away from you and turning her back to you as her hand went to her face, fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. 

You pursed your lips, looking to the floor. “Sorry. I forgot you didn’t like—“

“It’s not that.” She scoffed at you, blinking rapidly before she turned back. “I just— It’s just that I lost everyone else… I didn’t think I’d find you.”