#i dont for a moment think that what ive personally got access to on my first playthrough in the middle of act 2 is the limit fwiw

[danielnelsen]

ok so at this point maybe im deliberately taking the piss with my party size

[sburbian-sage]

Hello there! Its gm again

Glad we finally got this working

A lot has happened, from my perspective its been about two and a half years, ive completed a further two sessions

But i think we did it, i think we're out

We're back on earth, like normal earth

Well kinda normal

Sburb doesn't seem to exist here and our sylladex's have vanished along with basically everything we didnt have on our persons when we walked through the door

We had a hell of a session, one where we god tiered relatively early game due to the danger

Of the four of us (space, time, breath, and light) we seem to have retained little dregs of power, small things, our space player can give you the dimensions of a room down to the millimeter from just a glance type of things

I have an intimate awareness of time even without a clock

As far as we can tell paradox space is still out there but is functionally unreachable at the current moment due to technological restraints

Took about a year of tinkering just to get a stable signal using the replay-net dongle

Its

Is it strange that i miss it? Its strange out here, for gods sake i work at a gas station now how wild is that

Ive killed hundred of thousands if not millions or more enemies and created thing beyond understanding and met clowns and fought kings and queens and Eldritch beings and made fucking universes and i work at a gas station! A fucking gas station dude! Arguably the most normal of jobs that you could have!

Its wild! its so far beyond insanity that the four of us are sure we have to be in the game still

But its right there in the fuckin sky, like no one else can see it, a giant "thanks for playing"

We cant even go to some kind of therapy cause who the fuck would believe us? Gods sake our youngest is 13! She has at least 15 sessions under her belt, how the fuck do you even recover to a societal normal after decades of being fucking 13!

Its like sburbs final fuck you

I wish i knew what we did, how we got out how the fuckin menu got fixed or if it was just some fucking random twist of data

I wish i could help others leave

But we dont know and we have no way of figuring it out without access to the game and ill be fucking damned if we push our luck

I wish i could help you

The Sylladex isn't a SBURB thing, anyone can do that, dingus. Post disproven.

Okay but for real, even putting aside the fact that I innately refuse to believe "I found a way to fix the game" stories, especially with the addendum of "the game fixed itself mysteriously", I do have to interrogate the intention behind sending this ask. It can't help anyone because it happened randomly, it double-can't help me because I am not even in a position to receive random twists of fate. And ending it off with the random pitiable "I wish I could help you"? Every so often some guy will troll around by claiming they beat the game, say everyone else has a "skill issue" or is "not seeing the bigger picture which is why you're stuck there", and then starts making crass comments about how we're stuck standing in a circle and providing genetic material to a frog while they're going to spend the rest of their immortal life in their new universe being fed grapes and receiving blowjobs from their followers (and then they get banned), and I have to say, at least the troll posts are funny.

Even if this is true and you are now free from the game >assuming that a new SBURB session can't or won't be initiated in this new world, I cannot really help you acclimate to living a new life in a normal world, nor can I direct you to a resource that can do the same, because nobody has experienced this. The closest you'll get is guys with absurdly long (we're talking around three years) pre-Sessions, and even then they know the game is about to begin on some level, even if they don't know when, and that dread kind of characterizes the entire text. So enjoy that I guess.

[gerrymike]

Writing pointers Ive internalised up to now more or less for my own reference no one asked but i needed the refresher

- classic show not tell kinda subscribed to the Palahniuk school i dont have the article on hand but it’s good even though i forget to do it sometimes. My philosophy is show for the 80% of time where showing lets you puppet around sexier pictures, tell for maybe 20% of the time when you have a specific voice to the telling and if the pictures the showing makes are pointless/redundant/slow-downs. okay hey wait I found the article it’s called “Nuts and bolts”

- Ocean Vuong on metaphors where the metaphor HAS to serve a purpose or connect to something, or at least have an “underneath” underside to it that can’t be accessed through any other means, note: sometimes the metaphor comes to you but usually if you feel real strong about it and can’t seem to replace it with anything else then it’s probably got a hidden layer already that will show itself to you with time even if it doesn’t really make sense in the moment. This pointer is the main source of my anguish when i read my old stuff because Im always like fucccckkkkk this metaphor is so gauche, what are you doing

- again i dont fkin remember where this is from but the thing about external/internal prose - God i swear this is from someone’s medium account but i don’t know. Basically interior novels where page space is mainly your character’s thoughts VS physical space novels, with your characters moving around, acting out and interacting with an environment with their thoughts maybe veiled from reader. Kind of ties into Nuts and Bolts with the showing, but on a diff level I like to stay in the external realm in a way where you could block the whole novel as a play with clearer, charming actions that can translate to visually compelling stage directions. Of course it depends on how interior/exterior your narrator/character is but in principle i find it easy to dislike overly interior narrators (why should your reader care what your narrator thinks??)

- secondary to prev point, if the movement/interactions you block aren’t inherently stylish then they should serve a purpose, moving your characters from point A to point B necessitates a relevant activity at point B, a push factor away from point A, or valuable information communicated from what happens in the journey…wait i say stylish a lot i dunno if ykwim best example i can think of is from Miss Julie where (even though it’s secondary to the dialogue at hand) while Julie tries to bargain with Christine you have Jean VISIBLE TO THE AUDIENCE in the wings of the stage sharpening his razor two hands nodding to himself as she repeats exactly the words he used to bargain with her <- THAT is style

- kinda boils down to the common thing about ensuring motivations for all of your characters, like all of them should have wants that drive them to be in places (if you flesh your guys out wholly enough this should come naturally)

- on character voices best if you can reach a point where you can basically hear them chatting at you in your head: best examples I think are like, Mercymorn from the locked tomb (crazy brilliant and bonkers voicing from muir imo), Tennessee williams plays (but they’re plays so obviously the voices are meant to be heard - i just personally haven’t seen any of them performed so i hear them 100% based on williams’ skill in writing dialogue)… no real tips on getting to this point but if you’re going for a specific brogue obviously listening to it helps. Though the point of writing fiction is ofc that it’s fiction and you can make your characters talk funnier and smarter than anyone in real life might so like: liberties, my philosophy is style over realism in the tradition of stage monologues and the like, where your characters chat in the manner you wish people around you talked all the time (STRIKE THROUGH THE MASK!!!!!)

- word count for sake of word count is your enemy if you ever catch yourself writing a scene that bores you, if it bores your reader then no ones gonna be happy. Cut it and frame it in a way that you like enough to keep in at all costs

- lowkey been trying to cut down my semicolon usage because I grudgingly see the value of Cormac Mccarthy stylistic choices but laaaaiiiikeee its hard and sometimes you need it to install a kind of half-breath in your prose - i think the middle ground I want to reach is the use of it as a luxury and not like pepper (literally searched the last chapter for my semicolon usage and its 28 like 3 per thousand words :( help)

- literally never make me read the word cishet in a serious work of writing ever. “Dysphoria” no “trans” its 50/50 “genderfuck” get out of town no “intersectional feminist” no. Okay lol this point is just me being not liking any explicit integration of the present cultural-political terminology into writing and also me being a bit bitchy about this one lgbt cult novel named after a US state if you can guess which. My view is it will always be gauche and i dont like it and it tends to prompt me to say out loud to myself My God I hate gay people

More later if i think of it but i swear ive yet to meet the writing pointer from a true sage that is gonna transform my thinking and make what im capable of transcendental

[temporarymoods]

mwah

scatch what i said on that last post. idk her. im CHILLINGGGGG!!!

MarMon today: yes I celebrated. you gotta. duh. Patriot's Day-- a Mass thing!? Hilarious.

We went to the race and yelled and screamed and cheered on at various points. Walked a bunch. Got sunburnt in that shallow way, but my nose is pink. It was pretty emotional! So proud of everyone. Kept thinking that this is kind of one of the best things humanity can do. Anyway-- B)

Got sambas, lmfao?! Trying to look like a boy. Followed by some really good pasta. and then trying to look like a girl. i went to a frat! for the first time! i got champagne on my sambas. christened. the person who clocked me as queer at the party said "christened" after i had minutes prior. yeah. a good thing

- - i know the gender thing of it is ridiculous but for some reason my soft complicated body craves that sexual weirdness between men and women and particularly these young men and women in that..disgusting atmosphere. a disgusting atmosphere. really hungry for that generalization.. it's true. im really attracted to men

other than that^ being tough,

i went DANCINGGG!!!!!1!1!11!!11!!

and I LOVED IT SO MUCH!!!!111!1

What a GREAT night!!! i can't put into words how amazing i feel even though that is why i came here...shucks. has the moment past? did i spend too much time on the queue?

My foot is sore as I type this. I came home so inspired and read up on country swing vs other kinds (I knew jazz swing was the thing, and swing dancin aint line dancin !) then i listened to a lot of good music:

Slow Dancing - Aly & AJ * total classic for me lmao. damn they have the best spotify top 5

Let's Get Married - Bill Elliot Swing Orchestra * when i didn't yet understand that i had to look up **country** swing music. now i know ;) god i cant wait to go again

-- what is it?! i think its that i really love to dance, to move my body, to try and get it right, to improve? to be good? to have fun in a choreographed way. to conform. the do the correct thing. idk

here's what i think its really about: i think i like smootheness. and i like the click of a phenomenon you can't pull a word for. and short counts. and intention. and shape. mostly shape. beat, sure, too. i like beat. i like rising to it, and not tiring. i dont know how i get so obsessed. i need to go back. that was exactly what ive been looking for for months, and what i thought i found but only got in part in the club, which i go to for the dancing, the loud music, the blindingness. but i dont contribute there. my ears are filled but the sound can only vibrate me a little. im not, swung, literally. and i cant provide energy to the space like you can witcha boots awn. so yeah, i think thats really it. dancing. i fucking love dancing. ive always fucking loved dancing. for real! really! i never got that good, yeah. but i fucking loved it thats for sure. i always wanted someone to actually teach me shit. they didnt do that enough in theatre. maybe they did. maybe i just wasnt that talented. not now though. dead. fucking. ass. just input my entire work calendar that i have access to because this shits getting real my life is mine and theres fan fucking tastic things to be doing with it.

alright...i could continue...i'll pick up the rest in my dairy ;* not gonna get too personal, phew. uhm. eh hem.

That Don't Impress Me Much - Shania Twain

Tequila - Dan + Shay

End of Beginning - Djo * lmao i got on this because i saw some interview w him online as im jamminggugghh i got sucked in. then all this happened:

Change - Djo * so much better than the one blowin up btw

Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) - Eurythmics, etc * i looked up more songs like Change :| hahaha. then all this happened:

Lifetime - Yves Tumor

Pop Song - Perfume Genius

Here Comes the Rain Again - Eurythmics, etc

Here Comes Your Man - Pixies

Eye in the Wall - Perfume Genius

Boys - Amen Dunes * at this point my original mission is fucked. the intention's gone. i'm so far from where i started: country lovin

at the same time the joint i rolled before we went out and shared on the way home is getting its way through my system for sure. its approaching 2am, woah! full day tomorrow but not nearly as inspired at this one. this one's literally how you're supposed to live . well maybe beer not getting stolen at the bar mmmm. mhm. yeah i'll tack that on as well.

i didnt, dont, want to let go of tonight skrrreorgihveouhv!!!! uuuummm! yeah i should keep thinking about it. : ) : ) hehehehehe

Man! I Feel Like a Woman! - Shania Twain

<3 , so much ;)

Kate

[purpurrock]

Systems, I have to ask you something-

So from march-ish to may-ish this year I thought i was a median system. After all, I had alters with their own voices and names and stuff. However, I was never able to enter the headspace. Sometimes other alters fronted, but switching happened so fast that i didn't even realize i switched until later. I had no real amnesia either, although my memory is just shit in general.

One of my alters, I think her name was Addison or something, was bothering me a bunch. I don't remember exactly what she was saying, but her main thing was kind of like,, getting off on other people's trauma and saying she wished we had gone through things that our friends/mutuals on this site had gone through (and she was especially fixated on this one person) so we could be "really traumatized". I told a mutual that Addison was bothering me, and she typed something in all caps directed at her as a response. Don't remember exactly what she said, but my name and the word bitch were both definitely used (she wasnt calling me that though). I think it was something like "leave rocket alone Addison you bitch" or something like that.

And the weirdest thing happened. The moment I read that, Addison went quiet, and I had this migraine that was like,, a rising motion? And I felt like a weight had been lifted from my head. It was insane. Never heard from addison again. The other alters didn't say anything about it either, but to be fair I couldn't really hear them unless they were speaking directly to me or wanted me to hear them.

Around late may and early june, I'd done some shit on the site, hurt a lot of people both intentionally and unintentionally, and got unfairly banned. This practically broke me at the time cuz my parents were abusive and I had no friends n shit, so I practically had lived an entire 5-7 months on that site. By this time, all my alters were pretty much quiet. And now I can't find them. If I call out to them (pretty much just thinking their name) I feel some kind of movement(?) in the back of my head, kind of like a pulse. But I dont get a response. And ive never had access to the headspace, so I cant check there. I never really liked most of the alters, but I wanna know if they exist or if slightly younger me waa just in such a bad place that he created imaginary alters and thought they were real (I wouldn't put it past myself at all, honestly). Like, my birthday even passed and they didn't even wish me happy birthday! I think that's very rude if you literally live inside my head.

Anyways. Can anyone help me make sense of this story? Is it possible that calling Addison a bitch fused her in some way? Or was I never a system in the first place? And how do I get in the headspace, assuming I am a system and I didn't just make it up? I know these are dumb questions but I promise you this really did happen, this is how I remember it and I'm not trying to fake/make fun of plurality in any sort of way

[rigginsstreet]

People who view Billy's character in such a negative one-dimensional way come across as so sheltered to me. He really reminds me of my dad in a lot of ways, and when we watched S2 and 3 together we revisited convos about what it was like for my dad to grow up with a father like Neil, a mother who let him down, step-siblings he had toxic relationships with, and what it was like to have to let go of the ways he learned to survive it all. People really undestimate just how hard it is to break the cycle of violence when you're all on your own. If you're young and by yourself, with very little money or access to resources about abuse, then you just have to blindly stumble into the life lessons you need.

At the same time people also undestimate how capable of change people can be when they actually have a chance. Once my dad was out of his father's house during his 20s he had room to breathe and actually grow up. He put all his anger and fear into learning a trade instead of taking it out on others, put effort into learning about the people and cultures he was taught to be racist against, and eventually found a career working with young people so he could be the supportive figure he needed when he was their age.

Lots of folks who grow up to be good people were like Billy or like my dad when they were younger. Billy's story gets cut short before we get to see that though. It's still important to know that even if a victim of abuse is an asshole and a product of their shitty environment that doesn't mean they aren't worthy of help. You don't have to like them but that doesn't make them irredeemable. If people's support abuse victims is conditional on their moral purity then they are not the allies they think they are.

(also love the idea of Billy working with young people in his future one of my fave personal headcanons)

billy antis to me fall into the camp of either 1. being incredibly sheltered and having no idea what the fuck theyre talking about or 2. they say billy reminds them of whatever abuser they personally had in their life, so automatically theyre unable to separate that bias and generally its fuck whoever talks positively about billy (ive seen a FEW people able to see reason but....) 

and like thats a whole separate issue coming from the riverdale fandom and preferring the parents over the kids, all the damn time i had to hear people coming into mine or my friends inboxes/posts trauma dumping because x parent remind them of their parent etc etc and like girl... what does that got to do with me. like sorry you went through that but whats that got to do with me.

people need to learn how to separate fiction from reality. thats the first problem that needs to be addressed

but like if yall WANT to make it this deep and talk about the real world and shit, its so counterproductive to talk about abusive victims who are literal children and deciding theyre beyond redemption. its also very convenient how people pick and choose when someones a child. if you did x thing at age 17 youre a child but if you do z thing youre an adult. make it make sense. 

i feel like these people just... dont exist in reality? like i have to imagine theyre only interactions with other people are their echo chambers online because SURELY you cannot be interacting with real life human beings day to day in the real world and coming to these conclusions. people are incredibly nuanced. everyones got skeletons in their closet. everyones got things in their past they are not proud of. its what theyve made of themselves since their darkest moments that matters. its what people choose to do with themselves once they identify their problems and issues that matters. billy LITERALLY GAVE UP HIS LIFE. and its not enough for people. which is... insane to me. and heinously cruel minded. especially paired with how they go on to treat REAL PEOPLE for understanding his character. “i hate this character because theyre mean and bigoted so to show this i will go on and be mean and bigoted to other people”. like yall need some windex for your mirrors cuz clearly somethings not getting through when you look into it every day.

my brother and i had a notoriously toxic relationship when we lived together. we’re still not particularly close probably because of that (also theres a 7 year age difference so that was never gonna help) but like literally last time we were together a week or two ago to put up the christmas tree we were getting along, he even volunteered for all things to put our initial ornaments next to each other on the tree. we snuck upstairs before dinner to hang out in my room and smoke lmfao like... amazing what distance can do for a relationship i have full faith that all billy and max needed was for billy to move out and get away from neil and they would be maybe not besties but surely a hell of a lot closer than they could be under current circumstances.

people just dont want to put in the brainpower to think long term. they dont want to face the facts of billys situation because then they would have to realize how fucking shitty they are to people like him. and no one wants to do that. no one wants to realize theyve been the villain this whole time lmao

i had another thought but i lost it which is probably for the best cuz this response is already long as hell. 

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

trigger warning: scary sexual situation and nondescript discussion of cptsd relating to history of child sexual trauma

seeking advice, validation, resources, but advice most

nickname/word to tag my ask for finding them more easily: toadstool 🍄


i’m a freshman at college and i’m really struggling with something that happened a couple nights ago. i have cptsd and part of that trauma i had was childhood sexual trauma in various differeny forms/ways. (i am a nonbinary trans person my roommate is a cis guy, which is the same as the people in my past who hurt me in the way i mentioned above.) my roommate masturbated while i was awake and in the same room not even five feet away from him, and he knew i was awake, he just thought i couldn’t/wouldn’t see him. i immediately went into survival mode and froze, tensed and ready to defend myself, waiting for him to be done so i could flee the room. he didnt notice i saw what he was doing, and in the end i was too scared to move and flee the room. i am even more terrified now than originally. this triggered me immensley and ive been avoiding him and my room since, literally only going in when i absolutely have to which is hard for showering, laundry, sleeping especially, etc. before this, i wasn’t sleeping much at all due to distrust and fear from cptsd. now im sleeping even less, which is very negatively affecting me. its been really hard, i keep getting flashbacks to my childhood. its definitely bringing up my history of trauma. but idk what to call this. creepy? sexual harassment? something worse? we are both young adults but adults all the same, so even though i feel violated and scared (he is bigger and stronger, i am also physically disabled), i dont really know what i can categorize this as, what resources i can use, what i can do in general to cope. i have essentially been in survival mode and fight/flight/freeze/fawn since. i really need support but idk where i can go, what to call this (i have autism so my brain thinks categorically and that is part of what i need to process anything.) i know this has activated past traumas but idk if it counts as trauma on its own, or even what to call it. i also cant tell what is an overreaction from my cptsd and what is a normal reaction to something like this.

Hi anon,

I'm sorry to hear about what happened. Especially given your past experiences, it makes sense why this was such a distressing moment for you, and made you fear your roommate. While this wouldn't count as sexual harassment, you're still allowed to feel traumatized and distressed by what happened.

Please know that you're not alone. I had a somewhat similar experience where I was cuddling with a guy I hooked up with and he got a boner and I got so scared that I couldn't move (also a CSA survivor). I decided to talk to him about it afterwards and he was surprisingly apologetic and understanding.

It may be helpful to have a direct and honest conversation with your roommate about your discomfort and explore potential solutions together, like finding certain times he can do this that work for both of you. However, I completely understand if the idea of having this kind of conversation is intimidating or may not feel practical considering your relationship with him. Ultimately, it may be best to look into getting a different roommate if that interests you.

Depending on what kinds of accommodations your school has, they may include counseling in tuition. If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist could help you process this experience, heal from your previous trauma, explore potential solutions to this situation, and give you some helpful coping mechanisms that you can take with you.

If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[dissociativediscourse]

Today I got told by my therapist that if I want to schedule bi-weekly sessions rather than weekly, shes either going to “help me find another therapist within the practice to discuss my treatment plan with who MIGHT be ok with bi-weekly sessions” or shes dropping me as a patient, strictly because I have DID. She told me that she sees it as unethical on her part not to do weekly sessions, and that for some of her DID patients, she says them three times a week. Forgive me, shrink, but I dont want to focus on trauma recovery every single week when I JUST got out of a constant fight or flight state for the first time in my whole life recently. Why do I have to become trauma to get care? Why am I not allowed to have a busy, functioning life and DID at the same time? I was desperately looking for a great therapist that would specialize in trauma and dissociation, and she does, and I got that, but now its under the condition that I bring everything that I dont even have access to to the surface every single fucking week, something I dont have 1. time for, 2. energy for due to being chronically ill (which is where most of my fucking trauma and dissociation came from in the first place), 3. the space to fucking care about it when Im busy being able to look outside and know its not a literal firey apocalyptic wasteland out there. Theres grass outside. Theres trees and forests and wind and bubbling water and cold things and hot things and all these wonderful plants (I love plants) and animals and so many lovely things, and Im seeing all of that for the first time, and she wants me to see the earth burn again every week? Im not fucking Prometheus and she cant make me do shit. I fucking abhor how DID is somehow synonymous with such intense suffering it renders you either clinically inept or clinically insane. No, motherfucker, I survived. I fucking survived, you think my brain would do all of that just to leave me with dementia-like behavior? Fuck you, how dare you.

This just seemed like the perfect blog to send something like this in, I just had to get this out and I feel so alone with dealing with this shit. Trauma recovery should never mean removing the survivor from their present moment and bringing them back into trauma, especially WITHOUT CONSENT which is all Ive been fucking getting no matter how blunt and upfront I am about controlling my own care. I just want her to see a person, not pain. Why is there no nuance? Why cant I be a person in pain sometimes and a pained person other times?

I am glad you sent this here. I’m sorry I’ve taken so long to respond. The way October is for me has just made me step back a little.

It sounds like this is a blessing in disguise. (Signaling you to RUN!!) Because your therapist is doing so many things wrong I doubt they should be treating anyone with DID. I mean, the fact they’re trying to get you to do trauma work multiple times a week when you do not want to or threatening to drop you is one of the biggest therapist red flags I think I’ve ever seen. And it sounds like a tactic an abusive parent would use. Trauma therapy can be and is retraumatizing if it is not done right, and this is especially the case with DID. That’s why there are phases to its treatment.

You are supposed to be *reasonably stable enough to be able to handle any of the consequences that occur and to be able to cope with what you go through* when you start to deep dive into trauma. The VERY FIRST phase of treatment is stabilization. And it sounds like you are just being forced straight into constant… This? No!!! This is not how you do it!!! This is not therapy!! This is forcing someone to have flashbacks at your will and threatening them if they don’t!! How is that okay?? It’s not!!

And this isn’t even to MENTION that if you are not ready, or say you do not want to do trauma work that day, or are severely uncomfortable or a host of other things— the therapist SHOULD NOT be either making you do it or even allowing another part to try to force you into it for self harm purposes.

I’m so sorry. Please find another therapist. Let her drop you. That threat was a blessing in disguise. This is a situation that cannot end well, and I worry about her other patients if she acts like this is standard. She needs to deal with her own issues before she should be anywhere near others’. If you need resources for help finding therapists, please send an ask or a message my way letting me know or and I’ll help you out. There are also some in my #advice asks tag.

Trauma therapy should not torture you, it should not hurt like this. It hurts, but it should not be this way. And there are good therapists out there, it just sounds like you haven’t found one yet. And I’m really sorry for that.

If you’re an adult and you want someplace to gather resources for finding therapy/advice from others/to chat about any of this, it seems like you might have some use for the Survivor’s Network? It’s a discord server and it’s in my pinned. I know a lot of members have been through similar therapy situations, and when you are going through that, it’s nice to have a purely recovery-oriented space to help out. (Not trying to plug, just seemed helpful, lol.)

[yeetlegay]

hi, genuinely sorry to dump this all on you but also, would love to get your opinion on this!

I’m having kind of…qualms with kinnporsche since it aired. i’ve been so excited for the show since the first trailer dropped and im not necessarily disappointed per say, i feel like im mostly just trying to understand what i should be expecting from the show?? i think firstly, kinn and porsche’s characters in the show feel different than they were in the trailers (they feel WILDLY different from the first trailer lol) which isn’t honestly a bad thing at all, just again. different expectations. porsche’s character feels the most different; i definitely thought he was gonna be a lot more serious/focused and then gets swayed by his feelings for kinn etc. the thing i never expected was his goofy side (again not a bad thing at all but it leads to my main point which is —> ) i feel like the slapstick comedy of it completely blindsided me and i just dont. get it??? it’s honestly not that the comedy is bad, i just don’t really understand where it fits in. the show is everything it promised to be: great acting, production, styling, plot for the most part, writing for the most part, characters, directing, cinematography, etc everything is such high quality and when they stick to that it works so well but the comedy (specifically the slapstick-ness of it all) always seems so out of place with everything the show is trying to be and i can’t really understand the decision to include it. like these actors are GOOD the directing is GOOD the story is GOOD the production is EXPENSIVE i just (in the nicest way possible) don’t understand why they waste it on like. a few cheap jokes 😶

episode 5 was PHENOMENAL for this exact reason because it finally felt like the show we saw in the trailers. it had so many scenes that just wowed me: the opening scene, the bathroom mirror breakdown scene (which was so reminiscent of the hidden messages trailer), the sex parallels scene, the drunk confrontation scene ALL SO GOOD and showed off exactly what the show is trying to show off: its high quality acting, directing, and styling. i just feel like this episode was exactly what ive been waiting for since ep 1 and i just really really hope they stick with this vibe for the rest of the show it just serves them so so well. again, not hating on the comedy or the show whatsoever and i do not mean to be a stick in the mud AT ALL lol we’ve gotten some great moments from it, but i was just wondering if y’all felt the same or if maybe i really am just being a hater 😅 (also could be - hopefully - worried about nothing and they were just trying to keep things light in the first few eps before delving into the angst lol)

Given that first trailer was by a totally different production company and crew, the final product was always going to be way different once Be On Cloud got ahold of it, and I personally am so happy it turned out that way! You’re right that the first trailer and what we actually got are two totally different things, so I get that it could be hard to adjust your expectations with all the changes made.

As far as the comedy aspect goes, I’m by no means an expert in the Thai film and tv industry or even just Thai culture in general, so I don’t want to generalize too much, but I’ve found that pretty much every series I’ve watched, even the more serious melodramas, will feature some amount of this style of comedy, and atp I’m inclined to say it’s just par for the course! It’s not necessarily everyone’s cup of tea, and if you’re coming from a Western lens the mix of comedy and drama can be jarring at first. It’s maybe less immediately accessible to, say, an American audience or a British one, so there can be a bit of adjustment needed to get used to this style.

I did really like the comedy of the first few eps bc I do think, like you mentioned, that the show from this point is going to get darker, and we needed some moments of levity in the beginning to sort of set the stage and get us used to the characters before they get dumped into all these shitty situations. They’ll need to have those lighter, happier, funny memories when they’re in their darkest moments, and tbh we will too lol.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not finding the comedy to your taste - what we like is what we like! If you want to keep watching but aren’t jazzed about having the same amount of comedy that we got in the first few eps, then I’d stick it out for a while yet bc I’m pretty confident we’ll be diving into a lot darker and more serious stuff soon with more of that insane acting from Mile and Apo.

[strangemeatpie]

gonna document and give my thoughts on the lupin movies/specials ive seen in this post under the readmore because hyperfixation has me behaving most unwise. warning this is will get long

blood seal of the eternal mermaid (2011):

+ really lovely character designs especially for lupin he looked great

+ animation = good!!!

+ lupins dynamic with the maki was cute. i like seeing lupin in the cool big bro role

+ some gr8 zenigata moments

+ i liked those introspective moments with lupin questioning his identity and legacy

+ toonami dub cast. tony oliver lupin is just Right

- main plot wasnt super interesting to me tbh

- the rest of the gang kiiiinda felt sidelined? it felt very centric to lupin and i mean yeah he is the main character but i feel like theres usually a lot more gang shenanigans you know

bye bye lady liberty! (1989):

+ idk if everyone is gonna vibe with these 80s character designs but personally i loved them. it had a cartoony energy that felt fun. animation was nice too

+ silly :^) it made me smile a lot while watching

+ i felt like the whole cast was well utilized here. everyone got some good moments

+ moemon

~ tonally this movie is kind of.... bizarre. i wouldnt say thats totally a bad thing because personally i like bizarre tone but it might not be satisfying for those who prefer something more concrete or mature. this special almost feels like it could be something you could watch with your family with how goofy it is.... but then it will hit you with something that is clearly not family friendly

the castle of cagliostro (1979):

+ its a miyazaki movie. do i really have to elaborate. in the 1 hour in 40 minutes of this film you will have a wonderful time

+ pretty accessible for anyone to enjoy even if they dont know jack shit about lupin. i watched it with my gf who had never seen a lupin anime before and we both had a great time

+ i really gotta hand it to miyazaki for creating this kinder, gentler version of lupin. feel like this movie had to be pretty influential to future characterizations of lupin that have him as a lovable little rascal instead of a devastatingly horny morally bankrupt creature of chaos

+ fluffy jigen

+ peak zenigata design

+ badass fujiko

- id say the only real drawback of this film is that while it IS a great and accessible point for franchise beginners, they might get whiplash from moving from this pleasant gentleman thief lupin to a LESS gentlemanly thief lupin....

episode 0: the first contact (2002):

+ polycule: orgins

+ *pops voice* HAMBAARGAH?

+ jiglup my beloved..... seriously a jiglup essential. jigen is gay as hell in this special and i wouldnt have it any other way

+ the whole scene near the end where goemon chases lupin with zantetsuken

+ when lupin is briefly shown to have a whole wardrobe full of feminine clothes that would only really make sense for him to have if he wears them regularly. probably for disguises but i like that he seems so comfortable with it and its not made into a joke either. in fact in his very first scene he is disguised as a woman and was femme fataling for a heist and i honest to god thought he was fujiko at first

- .... not to say this or many other pieces of lupin media are progressive. ngl there were some parts i feel didnt age great particularly one horny lupin moment with fujiko that left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth

- artstyle is just kinda Bland. idk if i would go far enough to say its BAD but it didnt stand out to me

the first (2019): 

+ YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT BABYYYYYYY THATS THE GOOD SHIT THIS IS HOW YOU TRANSLATE 2D ANIMATED CHARACTERS TO 3D

+ i had so much fun watching this movie its a fucking blast. everything looks gorgeous

+ watched the dub and it was fantastic especially tony oliver doing a great job with lupin as always

- big cw for n*zis though and its unavoidable since they are the antagonists and its a big part of the plot

- besides that honestly i cant think of many complaints maybe the story isnt amazing but i feel like the primary objective of this film is to be fun and it succeeds at that 

the fuma conspiracy (1987):

+ cute!!!!! a fun lil movie thats an enjoyable watch

+ character designs and animation is great

+ i liked murasaki she was so good

+ terminally gay pops

+ opening song BANGS 

~ this movie somewhat notorious for not featuring the usual voice cast for the time because of budget reasons which is pretty weird but... ok? personally it didnt affect my enjoyment of the movie and these voice actors did a fine job but some may be off put by it

- no yuji ohno either 😔

the hemingway papers (1990):

+ jigens terrible taste in men

+ cute artstyle that is pretty much the same as bye bye liberty

+ i really enjoy jigen in this one. hes hung up over his Mysterious Gunslinger Past™️ and tries to be the lone ranger for a bit but in the end he cares about his silly polycule too muh

- gonna be honest this one kinda dragged for me a bit plot wise. there were a lot of cute moments but besides those and jigen’s ex sideplot it wasnt terribly interesting

- pops was definitely sidelined 😔

island of assassins/walther p38 (1997):

+ this is a great more action oriented special! if you are looking to watch something more serious but not quite koike levels serious this is a solid choice

+ i actually was pretty interested in the plot itself which is rare for lupin specials lol

+ amazing smooth animation and fight scenes!! it wasnt too shocking to find out that it had been worked by many well known talents in the industry like gainax/trigger’s hiroyuki imaishi

+ MY FUJIGOE CRUMBS

+ elen was a pretty cool original character

+ zenigata WAS kinda sidelined again but..... theres a scene where he literally resurrects himself from the brink of death right after his heart stops because someone in the room mentioned lupin. i think that makes up for it

- artstyle/character designs are kinda... idk if i would say BAD but they are very much a Generic 90s Action Anime style. not my favorite look

jigen’s gravestone (2014):

+ jiglup. i loved their relationship progression so much!!! it seems like they are still early in their partnership in this movie... work partners but not quite friends yet.... at first. you can really see the turning point where their relationship start evolving into something deeper and into the mutual trust we come to expect from them. its great im rotating them in my mind

+ animation is so so so so so great and sexy also

- time to address the elephant in the room... if you have seen jigen’s gravestone, or know anything about the plot, chances are you know what im talking about. fujiko’s narrative treatment is BAD bad and deeply disappointing even though i enjoyed the rest of the film a lot. really say what you will about twcfm but... sayo yamamoto would have never put fujiko in a scene like that, at least never at that level of gratuitousness. i heard these films do get better with fujiko and im still plenty of excited to watch more but yeah that was Yikes  

operation return the treasure! (2003):

+ this special was like. delightful. what a good goofy little experience. was laughing AND smiling

+ idk if it was just me but kanichi kurita seemed to be putting in effort to make lupin sound EXTRA silly. and i totally appreciate it because this lupin is so cute

+ animation was solid!

+ i thought the premise was great. the concept of the gang having to return a bunch of treasures instead of stealing them is so fun. the plot got a little strange with the alien stuff there at the end but hey its lupin its natural at this point

+ jigen :^) i love him being all like “this job is DUMB and im not doing it” at the beginning and then getting fully invested in the antics. this guy is way too weak for his partner

- Man in a Dress Joke :^/ for the most part the humor in this special is superb but understandably this one does not land great even if it is far from the worst of these jokes ive seen

prison of the past (2019):

+ must a lupin the third special be “good”? is it not enough to watch some entertaining stupid shit?

+ i really enjoyed watching this ngl the plot was not interesting but i enjoyed the character interactions enough that it made up for it

+ im glad yata was utilized in this special because his dynamic with zenigata is delightful. i hope they get to do more funny shit together in part 6

+ huge win for lupin/jigen/goemon enjoyers. it was really cute how goemon has a bit of reflection on why he decides to stay with these clowns and comes to the conclusion that he loves being part of this circus

+ jigens terrible taste in men: the return

- like i said the plot isnt interesting and i wouldn’t call it an Essential watch either but hey i came here to be entertained and i was entertained

tokyo crisis (1998):

+ finally time for pops to shine!! and he certainly does!

+ actual memorable original character!!!! bring back maria you cowards….

+ this is an ultimate jigoe special they are paired up for most of it and they are so goddamn funny

+ seriously this special is full of great gags

+ tho im more used to the toonami dub cast i saw the dub for this special recommended so i gave it a shot… and it Owns though i still prefer the toonami cast overall

+ animation is seriously top tier

- it might have been implied (in the dub at least) that zenigata had romantic interest in maria which is yknow a little weird since hes twice her age but ultimately its pretty low key and he gets firmly Father Figure Zoned by the end and nothing ever goes beyond that

[frenchphobic]

long fucking post on why a c!dream is a shitty person and probably should not have a redemption because it is unpog

honestly i just want to refute dream apologists thats why im making this post. i think that dream as a villain is interesting but i think that trying to make him out to be secretly a good guy is just bad ngl. also /roleplay and all

tw for abuse and mentions of suicide

dream as a villain

dream is a villain. he is chaotic evil according to wilbur, deliberately does not stream to appear less sympathetic (and yet), and is set up as an antagonist to tommy who bears the title ‘hero’. dream is not a good person, no matter how you look at it or try to justify his actions.

‘but he wants to unite everyone to be a big family :((’ the ends dont justify the means believe it or not. having a vaguely positive goal does not excuse the actions you’ve done. it also goes hand and hand with saying dream is correct for punishing tommy the way he did because he acted up. if i socked you across the face and then suddenly said ‘sorry there was a roach on ur face’ does that make it okay? probably not i still punched you, enacting an unnecessary amount of violence. thats a very simple analogy i will admit and there are more complex comparisons. another example off the top of my head is say a child just scribbled all over you walls with crayons. would hitting them be a justified answer? if u said hes thats really fucked of u go seek help u loon. violence as a punishment is very toxic, just because it gets the job done does not mean it is okay. at the end of the day, you still committed this act and the harm you caused is real, having a good motive doesnt suddenly make it okay.

‘but tommy causes all of the conflict’ the disk war wasnt even caused by tommy, it was sapnap and then tommy got involved. and the reason why tommy even caused conflict was because of the discs, because he wanted them back. and most of the time there was a level of antagonism from another party, such as schlatt exiling him, dream taking the disks in the first place, dream threatening l’manberg. and if dream wanted to end the conflict so badly, why didnt he just give tommy back his disks? tommy upfront said everything started with the disks, so he wants them back so he could end the conflict. notice how after tommy got his disks back he has been staying out of conflict, apologizing to everyone, and the only bad thing hes done is try to scam people but everyone does that. this would have been the most peaceful option, yet dream chose the path that would further antagonize tommy which then draws everyone else into conflict. why did dream need to have leverage over tommy so badly? why did he want to hold power over tommy so badly? its because of control, and that’s ultimately dreams end goal. sure he wants a big server family, but would said family have a free will?

‘but dream is sad’ the thing is dream is completely at fault for everything that happened to him. he pushed away sapnap (and george ig). he tried to take control over the server and their possessions. literally everything that happened to tommy. literally everything involving ranboo. villains can be sympathetic, i am not arguing against that. but it does not mean that they should be left off the hook. that doesnt mean u should ignore the shit theyve done because ‘oh no theyre sad’ because it doesnt make anything better. dream had this shit coming for him.

now people also skirt around calling dream an abuser. which is fair ig, its a very loaded word. its much easier to say manipulated. that being said, dream can classify as abusive. and no, tommy is not abusive. abuse is about control and a power imbalance. dream has power over tommy, but tommy does not have power over dream, at least not in the way dream does. he’s taking back power to stand up for himself, dream uses power to control.

the reasons i listed for why dream is from the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project so if u want a source on that, there you go.

using coercion or threats: dream often threatened tommy, such as the pit thing and often employed violence on him. while normally this could be attributed to Normal Minecraft Player Go Smack. minecraft mechanics cannot always translate to real world since violence is pretty normal in minecraft however we also need to consider the context of the scene. dream gave an order, tommy refused, dream applies violence, tommy submitted. thats why its a threat, it has tangible effects that can correlate to real life.

using intimidation: dream blew up logsteadshire as a punishment. dream also destroyed tommys items anytime he visited. dream also hit tommy with his axe i believe. he killed mushroom henry, one of tommys pets.

Using Emotional Abuse: dream guiltripped the shit out of tommy for just hiding things and pinning the blame on tommy for just wanting his own private items. he definitely played mind games on tommy, pretending to be his friend. honestly i probably dont even need to go as in depth because it was so obvious.

Using Isolation: putting him in exile in the first place. destroying the bether portal so no one could visit tommy anymore. i really dont think i need to expand upon that.

Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming: dream in tommys stream when he got trapped said that exile wasnt that bad. he does shift the blame onto tommy for logsteadshire being blown up, even though dreams reaction was entirely unjustified for not listening and hiding.

Using Economic Abuse: see this is where i attempt to parallel minecraft mechanics to real life. obviously, there is no monetary system in place, so when i mean economic, i will use valuables such as armor, food, etc in place of currency. the idea behind economic abuse is to limit the victim’s resources so that they are dependent on the abuser and cannot escape. dream only really allowed tommy to have the armor he gave him while not giving access to armor so he does not regain a sense of power, and in the prison stream, dream holds all the potatoes which puts him in a position of power over tommy. this argument is more ambiguous i feel cause the whole minecraft mechanics thing is kinda weird so u don’t necessarily have to take this part in.

i feel like i need to emphasize this very strongly because dream is not a good person. abuse cannot and should not be a response to someone. its an awful mentality to have. i just want to prove the point that dream is not a good person, his reasons absolutely do not justify his actions.

what makes a good redemption

redemption arcs are tricky. when done right they are great. when done poorly, its a slap in the face. rn im going to establish a formula to what makes a good redemption with an example.

the most well known example of a good redemption is zuko from atla. first, its the magnitude of what theyve done and why. zuko did commit some shitty actions, since he was in a position of power in the fire nation but its because he is a child being abused and wanted to regain honor. zukos real awful acts was season 1 and the whole betrayal thing. thats not to say that zukos actions suddenly are okay, he did shitty things. but its something that can be traced to a higher entity or seem less malicious then the other villains. the thing also about the magnitude of actions is that there is a certain point of atrocities that there is no redemption. some people simply cannot be redeemed because the actions they commit are so ingrained in their character or the action itself has serious moral issues that it would just be wrong.

the next is acknowleding what they did was wrong. a genuine reflection on the self and analyzing what they did and why it was not okay. zuko realized what he did to uncle iroh was bad for example. he turned his back on his father, realizing he didnt and shouldnt seek acknowledgment from someone as heinous as him. its pointing out your actions and going ‘hey, this wasnt right i should not have done this’ and not even excusing ur actions. its also going straight for the root of the problem and figuring out to stamp it from the source. just because a character is sad does not mean they are reflecting, sometimes they are attempting to garner pity. it has to be direct and clear acknowledgement of the injustice.

and finally, an important part about redemption arcs is the actual redemption part. its when you make amends. zuko made amends with katara by trying to help her get revenge, he fought against the fire nation and tried to make things more peaceful in his rule. he apologized to iroh. an important part of the amends section is that it does have to be a genuine desire to change and become a better person, not to change a person’s perception of you. the thing is u cant expect a person youve hurt to forgive you. you cant expect people to be sympathetic towards you nor should u attempt to make urself sympathetic. u shouldnt be expecting a pat on the back or an award. redemption is about internal and character change.

why dream should not be redeemed

ive already established the key points to a good redemption (imo) but heres where dream falls short. his actions are extremely heavy so redemption may not even really be possible. abuse is not something you can wave off so it does cross to the point of fucked up. acknowledgement of what he did was wrong? all he said was that he changed, yet never explained why he changed or was too vague. he needed to label specifically what he did and bring it up. attempting to make amends? he’s been doing the exact opposite in fact he continues to manipulate tommy and ranboo. its not a genuine change. he is still repeating the cycle and has given no indication of ceasing. at the moment he does not have any signs of redemption.

and the thing is most of the attention around a dream redemption comes from either justifying his motives (which i do want to emphasize does not make anything suddenly okay) and because he is sad in prison sad face. these are not good reasons. its gonna pain me severely to bring this up but snape from harry potter does have some form of sad character ig yet he very much abused his authority to bully children as old as 11 just because he said ‘aight gonna die’ doesnt suddenly make his general bigotry and abuse suddenly okay there is a threshold. again im so sorry for using harry potter as an example none were coming to mind and i needed a popular one i do not like harry potter please dont say i do i would pass away.

and the last thing to consider is the audience. keep in mind that the audience is composed of minors and while yes there are adults, minors are the main component of the fandom. keep in mind that there are quite a few people who can relate to tommys character because they might be in the same position or have gone through his experiences. tell me what kind of message does it send to that audience that abusers can be redeemed. this is not a narrative u should push to this audience in these situations and the writers are seemingly aware of it. remember how in exile tommy spiraled into a suicidal mentality? consider how fucked of a message it would be if he just committed suicide instead of escaping abuse and attempting to recover from his experiences. tommy did an excellent job in not going that route and having a message of ‘it will not get better’. its the same thing here. victims are not obligated to care for or forgive their abuser, and portraying an abuser as sympathetic might fuck with the message a lot, even change their perception in that ‘oh, maybe my abuser was right, maybe they had a reason for treating me the way they did’. this is not to say that every victim watching this will internalize this message, but people also look up to these characters. there can be a degree of influence from the story onto oneself and thats the dangerous part.

conclusion

all in all dream is a shitbag asshole and probably shouldnt get a redemption because it would not be pog thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[seriouslysam8]

Hello, Sam!

I have just started reading your series Moments in Time that I saw Breanie recommended and I must say, it is absolutely wonderful so far!

Croup: This was not at all what I expected! I stumbled across this universe recommended on Breanie’s tumblr and thought I better start in order. PUH-Tunia really is a bitch! You can just see the abuse already inflicted on him and he’s only three! The mental anguish of a three year old being told he can’t have nice things because he breaks them can’t have been good for poor Harry! No wonder’s so unsure of everything later on. Yelling at him because he’s sick like it’s his fault! Im surprised she even gave him medicine! Wanting him to sleep outside in the “frigid air” and only deciding not to because the neighbours might see really says a lot about her personality. Ive never read anything from Petunia’s point of view before but well done. I hate her even more than before. I look forward to following this new adventure that is your moments in time universe. Great read!

The Boggart of Grimmauld Place: This was just so heartwarming! Harry getting to spend even a little time with Remus and Sirius at Grimmauld Place was what was missing from canon. Memories of his grandparents, learning about them. It was just lovely! When Harry is ashamed of wanting Sirius to embrace him a little longer my heart ached for that poor boy who never got to feel real hugs and affection. He thinks he should be ashamed for wanting to feel it and he shouldnt! I blame for petunia for that. I meant to say that in Croup how she touched his forehead to check for a fever and he flinched like he’d been expecting her to hit him. Poor poor little Harry. I love how you play on the connection here between Harry and Sirius and even parallel it to the Potters and Weasleys. Harry being surprised that he would be in Sirius’ will at all. Harry just being surprised that people care about him. Makes me want to just give him a hug! What abeautiful story! Thank you.

Hide and Seek: This was so fun! I love the thought of them all playing hide and seek in Grimmauld Place and everyone joining in! Remus and Tonks making out in the cupboard was the best! It was definitely my favourite part and Sirius just teasing them! Hermione thinking something happened between Harry and Ginny. I loved how Harry opened up a little to Ginny. You could see he was actually really comfortable with her in a way he’s not with people. Absently massaging her wrist, touching her. He was caught up in her without realizing he was caught up in her. Adorable! The second addition was wonderful! I love how Ginny just took control, loosening his tie, taking off his jumper… they are the superior couple! While I am a tad disappointed to not see them making out at the end, I loved this story. Thank you.

Seventeen: Wow! This was a story I didn’t know I needed. Harry and Ron lovingly admitting they’re brothers warms my soul. I love that touch of giving them matching watches! Was that canon? If not it should be. Mrs weasley feeling guilty over Sirius is so like her. She loves and cares for Harry as if he’s her own son and it’s wonderful to see. The last bit with Ginny was perfect! They definitely had to do more than the uninterrupted kiss and I love how Harry just basked in her. The end made me so sad! His heart breaking over missing her birthday, lost opportunities. Very beautifully done! These one-shots are amazing and I look forward to reading more of them. Thank you.

The Demise of Walburga Black: This was absolutely amazing! The image you crafted of them laughing like lunatics as they destroyed her portrait was awesome! What I like most so far about your writing is how you gently weave in Harry’s relationship with the Weasleys. I love the idea of George moving in with him and Ron, that Harry would offer his home to him like that. I love that Harry goes to Mr Weasley for renovation advice. I think its so hot that Harry would renovate the Muggle way (so sexy to see men in a tool belt and I’m going to assume he’s shirtless and sweaty). I love that it was Angelina’s idea and how you casually had Ron toss in that George and Angelina were already sleeping together. George not really being drunk, is that because he drank a lot to cope with Fred’s death? I think it is. Harry’s reaction to being caught by Mrs Weasley, how his guilt eases into pleasure that Mrs Weasley would call both himself and Ron George’s “younger brothers” and his glee in being lectured by her in a motherly fashion. And dont even get me started on the scene with Ginny! The way he gushed on his drunken ramblings about making a home with her and wanting to raise a family and her not wanting to get her hopes up because he’s so drunk! I laughed out loud when Harry said that drunk Harry wants to do dirtier things with her or something like that. Just wonderful all around! Where’s Teddy in this story? I know he lives with Andromeda in canon but I thought I read that you have Harry raising him. Ah well, maybe the next tale will answer that question! Thank you.

That’s all I’ve had time to read so far, but I just wanted to say thank you for writing such a rich and vast universe! I can definitely see why Breanie recommends you so much! I have a few questions if you don’t mind.

1) What made you decide to write a story about Harry’s early childhood from the point of view of Petunia instead of Harry?

2) Do you think Petunia and Vernon physically abused Harry when he was little? It’s fairly obvious he had psychological abuse, but do you think there was more?

3) Do you think Ron and Hermione knew Harry had never played childish games like hide and seek as a child? Do you think the others knew and that’s why they all agreed to join in?

4) When do you think Harry actually started to notice Ginny? Was it in his fifth year and he just didn’t realize or do you think it was later? There is the scene where she puts him in his place over the possession bit and of course when they get kicked out of the library together. What are your thoughts?

5) Was it canon that Ron and Harry have the watches of Mrs Weasley’s brothers?

6) Do you believe George could handle his alcohol better because of his age or were you insinuating he had become accustomed to the drink after losing Fred?

7) Where is Teddy when Harry lives at Grimmauld Place? From the summaries of your stories I got the impression Harry raised him. But I haven’t read any further so I may be wrong.

Sorry for so many questions, but I am curious. I look forward to reading more. Thank you for your time. You’re amazing and I love your work! Thank you.

I have been following your review journey and getting more and more excited the further you get into the universe!! I am going to try my damndest to answer all these asks you’ve sent today but I have an incredibly busy weekend, so it may take me a little bit to answer them all especially if you’re asking specific questions since I won’t have access to my computer a lot. So, I will answer all your asks, but give me the weekend because I want to give you the best and most detailed answers I can!

1.) Honestly, Croup and Brontide (I promise, no spoilers) are the reason I started this as a series. I mentioned Harry had croup a lot as a child in Brontide and then wanted to write a companion piece. I thought, what better way to demonstrate Harry’s childhood then telling a story through Petunia’s POv because she’s absolutely horrible. Plus, I didn’t think I could get into the mindset of any other POV for that story.

2.) I definitely think there was physical abuse as well. It’s indicated in the books (Harry knowing to dodge away from a frying pan or something). So, I do feel they did physically abuse him as well. He has a few scars to show from it.

3.) No, I don’t think they knew. Maybe some suspected it but not know. I think everyone was just sick of cleaning Grimmauld Place and wanted to do something fun. It didn’t matter it was a child’s game. They just wanted something to do.

4.) I think he started to like Ginny as a friend in fifth year. I think he started to notice her as someone more than just Ron’s little sister. I don’t even think he noticed how he felt comfortable around her in fifth year either. I like to think all the dots started to connect earlier than 6th year but Harry just didn’t know what it all meant. Then 6th year come and he’s like crap… I really her! But it was building, unknowingly, to Harry before then. Ginny had been slowly forming into her own person in Harry’s mind and he felt comfortable and liked what he saw. He just didn’t connect it romantically at that time.

5.) No, the watches isn’t canon. I wish it was though. Honestly, when I wrote it, I totally forgot they mentioned Ron getting a brand new watch in canon until months after I wrote the story.

6.) George was a bit of an alcoholic after the war. It’s mentioned more in-depth in Brontide. But he definitely held his alcohol better because he has been spiraling into alcohol abuse for months by that point.

7.) So, again it’s mentioned in Brontide, but Teddy lived with Andromeda for the first year of his life before Harry gained custody of him. Andromeda didn’t feel comfortable with Harry raising Teddy at first. Once she got to know him and see how much Harry cared for Teddy, she handed over custody to Harry so that Teddy could live a more normal life and have parents and siblings.

[nightswithkookmin]

MONDAY, JANUARY 18TH: GOLDY'S LOG

I miss Suga. Scratch that. I miss Agust D. My spirit animal.

I've been thinking about him a lot lately, wondering if his injury isn't an exemption to military service. I wonder if he qualifies, in light of his injury, as an able body. I wonder what their law defines as able body.

I wonder if he passed the legal physical exam and health assessment test when he turned 19, since he's had that injury way before debut. Or if BTS have undergone that mandatory military service assessment since they are all past 19 and what their results are.

Jimin has chronic back pain too. That should qualify him for an exemption to military duty. He can still do desk work if it's that serious.

I should talk to ***** and look into South Korea's law on exemptions to military service.

Moon values the arts and culture industry. There's already been an extension for conscription for the benefit of BTS. Their success and longevity in the spot light perhaps influenced this decision. Should BTS maintain this momentum, an exemption would be inevitable I feel.

I miss them. They've been gone for too long. I'm worried about the impact this is going to have on their popularity if they disconnect from fans for so long or be mechanical about the way they connect with their fans.

I hate the limited access to them. But Scarcity increases the value of a product and it's not surprising if this is the approach BigHit is adopting in the wake of the pandemic.

Limited access not only raises value, it creates demand. Bang PD is a bigbrain marketing genius- I hate it.

They are taking a huge risk with this new marketing strategy. Personally, I'd stick to what works but then I am no marketing guru. Just a consumer who likes to play it safe. I guess I won't be getting hired anytime soon. Fuck.

It's all very fascinating.

What's equally fascinating is the shippers out here on these streets. The Jokers.

I... they confuse the hell out of me sometimes.

How are they going to question my rationality when I talk about moments I feel Jikook are having issues in their relationship or had broken up etc but then have no problem with and even applaud that same rationality when I talk about moments that has led me to believe there is lack of depth in Tae Kook's dynamics or that they are not real by any standard or that another ship in BTS isn't real.

Do I have two minds? Or are they more inclined to be selective in their beliefs based on their biases towards Jikook and against other ships? It's weird.

By the same lens I define Jikook as real, I define Tae Kook or any other ship that includes JK and Jimin as not real. And by that same lens if I feel Jikook aren't together then I'm wrong and irrational?

It really confounds me.

Not sure if they expect me to apply double standards to Jikook in those instances.

I don't think there is right and wrong opinions or perspective when it comes to shipping, but I think if they are right about me being wrong about my perspective on Jikook then I must be wrong about my perspective on any other ship in BTS as well.

I can't be right about one and wrong about another. I'm either right about all or wrong about all.

I can't be 'right' about Tae Kook having 'issues' in their bond in such a way I think it often bars them from fully nurturing their bond and developing depth to it but then be 'wrong' about Jikook also having issues that mess with their bond from time to time when it's the same measurement I use in accessing the depth of bond of both ships.

I really don't understand their way of thinking.

What is right and what is wrong and who decides on that?

I think we ought to substitute right and wrong with 'believe and believable.' The approach to such discourse should be about what one is willing to believe or not believe about certain discussions: I believe this. I don't believe that. Because believes stem from our personal biases towards a subject.

And the people that come running to me with 'look, Jikook smiled at each other in On era so change your mind'

I would except I hear this debate all the time. I wonder if they realize they sound exactly like the Tuktukkers in my DMs trying to convince me Tae Kook is real.

'Look Tae sat on JK's laps! How can you say there is no depth to Tae kook' ' He squished JK's cheeks' 'Jk said he wants to ride with Tae, if there was no depth why did he say he wanted to ride with him'

I have a feeling Soft Koo is back. The days of Terminator JK might be over. Too bad, I liked terminator JK. He was a bad ass.

I like that he is experimenting with his looks. But I'm glad his Ravi-esque phase is over. I wonder who he is drawing inspiration from this time. He reminds me of Jimin though. There is something peaceful and serene about his looks.

Can't really tell much because Bighit is sitting on tons of footages. I think I need to send a truck to Bang PD HQ.

I don't like that Jimin posted a Vhopemin photo for Tae's birthday. It was cute and all but I don't like it. That shit felt passive aggressive as fuxk. Lmho. What, he didn't have a V or Vmin photo in his gallery? Sounds like someone didn't put much effort in their VMin agenda for this post.

I wonder if he will keep the same energy come JK's birthday. I mean both him and Tae didn't post for him💀

May be I'm reaching on this one. But a single post where V was not even the focus of the post... I think his birthday means a lot to him and he enjoys when people shower him with love and attention and I don't think his birthday is an exception.

And he kept reiterating after such said birthday how he recently discovered he loves to be loved and how he does most of the things he does in order to be loved by his fans, friends and family.

And it breaks my heart that, the headlines read BTS shower X, Y with love on his birthday but the two people close to him were missing from that list this time. The media talks about BTS posting for eachother as them showering eachother with love. Certainly they all know this.

And the fact Jin posted for Tae after Tae's birthday says a lot about Tae and JK. Tae had no intention of posting perhaps because he left JM a message on the packages. With Jin I feel he was overcompensating for not posting for him on his birthday...

JK gets a pass. If JM wasn't happy about him not posting for his birthday, he would have pulled a Jin.

Jimin talking about coming to the realization he loves to be loved makes me think JK withholding his affections openly made him come to the realization he loves to be loved. Just a hunch. And the only reason JK would withhold his affections is if Jimin himself estopps him. Those two give me headaches.

I think I got the closure I needed from this.

LESSON: dont get on JM's bad side and bloody post for his birthday 💀

Tae been releasing photos of Jimin and Jhope a lot lately. Not sure how that makes me feel either. I think it's beautiful. But when I think about all these beautiful photos he has of Jimin on his phone and how generous he is with them- I think they would have been more meaningful had he released it on JM's birthday. The snow photo he posted still sits in my Vmin heart somewhere.

I really don't like this not posting for each other's birthday business. It's 2021. They need to cut it out.

I feel JK set a bad precedent but personal happiness first so good for him.

This moment haunts me for some reason.

What was going through V's head. I want to know. RM looks done. Lol.

Jimin is really beautiful. I love his eyes when he smiles and the thing he does with his shoulders.

Some people complain I write a lot. Some say I don't write enough. Ayayayai!!!!!!

What to do.

I think I accidentally deleted a post.

I'm looking forward to JKK1. Stay Gold, Still with you, Your eyes tell... I hope he hasn't given his best away cos those were bops.

PJM1... oh God I'm nervous. I'm excited for it but nervous. I think Serendipity is a classic. The Christmas song was equally great and frankly the only good Christmas Ive heard so far and I don't even like Christmas- nothing against Baby Jesus I just think it sucks. That bridge in Dis-ease is something.

I want to read his thoughts. His spotify playlist is insightful but I want to confirm if he really sees himself as a mess who is always causing his lover grief.

I mean he did say he has realized he needs to be considerate towards those that love him. Not sure yet the connection there.

I want to read his thoughts.

PJM1....

I love JHOPE. I think his ship with Jimin is beautiful and healing. They make my insides warm. Not sure if their shippers think they are real. Do they? That would be awkward.

I think RM and Jimin need to spend time together... it would be good for them.

Jimin and Sungwoon shippers are alleging Jimin has been staying with Sungwoon all this while. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

But the bit about him living with Sungwoon before the start of Bon V 4 has me🤔

Around that period, I don't believe JM was at the dorms and Jikook were not together then too. He must have been staying somewhere...

I'll let them have that.

But around November 2019 when he was having issues with JK he was staying with Tae too so no I don't think that means Sungwoon is queer or that Jimin is sleeping with him💀

They need to get out of their imaginations.

I think Jikook will drive me crazy one day.

I can feel my cranium swelling.

JiRose shippers need to pack it up. They really think Jimin is straight? 💀

It's the bad editing for me.

That doesn't look like a straight face to me. Unless his butt was on fire and he was uncomfortable looking at that black interviewer, I think that's his flirting face.

Lately I've been thinking about what ifs.

What if Jikook is not real?

I wish I believed that.

[ifyouseekay468]

what do YOU personally think the teenagers (mcr) lyrics are about my friend ? like i keep thinking about them but im not sure im going somewhere

okay, ive answered this ask twice on mobile and each time my phone deleted it, so here I go, the FINAL version of this post

It's been a hot minute since I listened to teenagers so I decided to do a quick run-through of the lyrics, and while Gerard&Co were raised catholic the lyrics seem to REEK of protestant trauma, so that's what I'll be going off of, but I'm pretty sure the two denominations overlap here. The first verse is about kids in youth group, Christian GirlsTM especially, who are put there to pressure you into being "normal" into "cleaning you up with the lies in the book" (bible), although the pastor is the one giving the teaching THESE are the people who will get you to BELIEVE, who will get you to lie to yourself, who will get you to church camps that on some level utilize brainwashing techniques, and will DESTROY you with the idea that you're "Just one of them, and just need to change everything about yourself and fake your way through every last sermon to be just a part of the gang",

The part about sleeping with a gun and keeping an eye on you is about two things: one, about the idea that God can see all your thoughts, that THINKING about "sin" (ie; fantasizing about sex) is as bad as COMMITTING sin (which is fucked up entirely on its own because fantasy is SO FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM REALITY and that is a CRUCIAL aspect of sexual expression in order to safely engage in sex), AND the fact that these kids will pretend to be your friend, will prod you into doing things with them, into telling them things about yourself all the while making you feel like "part of the group" when really they're just blabbing either to religious leaders, or are ostracizing you and bullying you behind your back.

"The drugs never work"

This in my opinion points to the fact that this song is specifically about being QUEER in a christian culture. It is common for trans people to turn to drugs or psychedelics in an area that has little to no access to gender affirming care, or acceptance because they both change reality and disconnect one from the body that is causing their dysphoria. It can also help burn away the guilt, so to speak.

The methods of keeping you clean is about two things: one, about purity culture, no smoking, no drinking, no friends who drink, no sex, no porn, no masturbation, no impure thoughts. The second, is the way they're able to subtly manipulate you into hiding yourself, into lying to yourself, into forcing yourself to the point of death into being cishet. They're keeping you clean not just from the vices of addiction, but the vices of the flesh, the vice you can't escape because it's a part of you from the day youre born. On a darker note, this could also be referring to c*nversion th*rapy, given this second interpretation of the lyrics

"Ripping your head and aspirations to shreds," Is again about two things in my opinion: both the idea of "losing yourself to God's will" that usually leads one to losing their identity and getting depression and fucked up mental health, and the "shift" that happens at church when you reach a certain age. You know the kind, right? You're four years old, and church is FUN! You get to go to this big room and sing and dance on stage with all your friends! You get to play GAMES! You get to talk to the ~cool teenagers~ who are ~Just like you~ and ~think youre a "cool kid"~, you have ~best friends~ who will be with you like Jesus and the 12! but then, one day, something happens, something SHIFTS. maybe the Sunday school teacher leaves, maybe there's a new family at church, maybe the church changes buildings. Maybe none of that has to do with any of it, all you know is that now things are forever different. Church isn't fun anymore. The kids classes are repetitive, they're bribing you into memorizing bible verses with money, they DONT reward critical thinking or analysis, but they do call you smart, that's because they dont want SMART kids they want OBEDIANT ones. You have no choice but to stat going to REAL church. Suddenly, your best friends are not your best friends. Suddenly they're avoiding you. Suddenly they're lying to you. Suddenly you're too... well they don't know the word yet but "gay" for them...

"Teenagers scare the living shit out of me"

This is what youth group does to you, it isolates you from your entire generation because there are few people your age and a whole lot older than you, and everyone is so much DIFFERENT from you for some reason, but neither of you know why, not yet anyways. This makes you distance yourself from teenagers, because you can't SEE yourself as a teenager, because youre nothing like other teenagers.

"They could care less as long as someone will bleed,"

This is the martyr complex that permeates youth culture like the smell of wine, the problem? these kids love to make a show of themselves and their martyrdom, but they're unwilling to martyr themselves, so what do they do? They throw someone else to the wolves and take the glory. They ostracize and eliminate the unique in the name of preserving their faith. They convert and convert and god help anyone who doesn't want to convert.

"So darken your clothes and strike a violent pose"

This is about deconversion, how the moment you leave the church you never want to see another cross till the day you die, that you want to avoid christians of all costs because you don't want them To drag you back into the pit that devoured you. So you do anything and everything you can to make yourself repulsive to Christians, which actually coincides with your indulgence of mundane activities previously considered as "sin"

"Maybe they'll leave you alone but not me,"

There's a different between a cishet ex Christian and a queer ex christian, and that difference is that a cishet atheist is more likely to be left alone than a queer one, especially a queer one whose whole demeanor screams "Christians be gone," that shit is like... it summons christians faster than free winter jam tickets! They swarm to you frothing at the mouth with holy water waiting to either convert you or exorcise you into purity, depends on if you want them or not. Again, you don't even have to be OPENLY gay, they can TRACK this shit. it's like fucking... INSTINCT or something.

"The boys and girls in the clique, the awful names that they stick, you're never gonna fit in much kid,"

as alluded to above, this lyric is about how, even from a young age, BEFORE youth group, this toxic culture kind of develops. ESPECIALLY around christian girls. They don't have the vulgarity of slurs, but they can make up for it with slang like "tomboy" "nancyboy" "too boyish" "a sissy" "Weird" etc, youre NEVER going to fit in, because the moment that "shift", from fun games and songs to Real Church, occurs, you have a target on your back.

"But if youre troubled and hurt what you got under your shirt will make them pay for the things that they did,"

This is probably a gun. But that's a tad too boring for my taste. If you were raised protestant you KNOW that being an ex protestant, after the craziness of evangelicalism, you would not hesitate to burn down your old church. It could be a secret tattoo, top surgery scars, hell maybe even nipple clamps. Whatever it is, it's symbolic of revenge. I know that anytime I wore my labrys necklace to church I would always hide it under my shirt. I hid books and CDs under there too. Again, it's about revenge, it's about breaking free, gun or no gun, the point is getting out and getting back at them.

and thats pretty much my take on the song. Again, this is not about artist intent this is just what the lyrics reminded ME of personally (as you can see from the over biographical bullshit I wrote), I'm always open to contradicting interpretations though as I always have like 2+ interpretations of a song or book! I never really saw the song through the lens of youth group specifically but when I went over the lyrics again in retrospect it all seemed to really click (pun not intended) well! Thanks for the ask!

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

So ive posts from what seem to be RWBY panels on V7 and since theyre always long im just making my own post with specifics i wanna talk about

The crew kept trying to get the Marrow and Blake convo about Atlas faunus (and Marrow reaching out to Blake to connect over how theyre both faunus) in but it kept getting cut. We will be getting it in a future volume

YES!!!! I really wanted this (both the convo and the bonding) and i thought itd make the Ace Ops vs RWBY more painful. By "a future volume" does that mean Marrow will be in more than just V8???? (Does this mean hes leaving Atlas with RWBY or are we getting a third Atlas vol?)

The merge has begun, and Oscar had been accessing Ozpin's memories ("a city in the sky is held to a higher standard")

Okay i knew the merge begun as soon as Ozpin woke up in Oscar but hearing it confirmed that it didnt stop with Ozpin hiding (which makes sense) makes me a little sad. Oscar got like a month where he got to be Just Oscar most of the time

What Oscar told Ironwood in the vault made Ozpin brave enough to come back

MY HEART!!!!! Oscar you are offically to good for this world. But yeah i was on the popular theory tagt he came back because he knew Oscar was in danger/was dying

Qrow looking at Clover after Nora's outburst in Ironwood's office was a sign of growing distrust with Clover

I personally didnt really focus on or think about this moment that much but i know the fandom thought it was like a look of reassurance. It makes sense a lot of people forget that 1) Qrow is  suspicious of everyone all the time 2) Qrow is known not to like how Ironwood runs Atlas or how loyal Atlas soilders are

During the tundra fight Clover identified Qrow as the bigger threat, not Tyrian

All i can do is just remember the flood of post with "Clover should have focused on the bigger threat!" And like bro he did we just assumed he knew how dangerous and skilled Tryian is. But now that i think about it there was also a lot not known about him outside of the fact he was a serial killer, and Qrow is ranked among the best Huntsmen in Remenant (Ace Ops are the best Huntsmen in just Atlas) AND worked along Ironwood in the field before, so probably Ironwood briefed the Ace Ops on Qrow when RWBYJNROQ first arrived.

Weiss feels really unconfortable in the scenes with her mom, because she doesnt know how to help a adult with a adult problem

Dang.

Somebody (i forgot sorry) pushed for Blake to hold Weiss' hand when she was facing her father. The rational was Blake is the only one who understands how hard this interaction is going to be while Yang and Ruby have no idea a father would ever say things like this to his daughter

MY HEART!!!! It hurts!! But yeah i was wondering why it was Blake and not anyone else unless it was like part of her becoming more emotionally open after defeating Adam. I didnt think she was trying to pull a faunus political move at the moment but i was really expecting a fanus comment from Jacques

Ren is emotionally distant from Nora this volume, and the crew was upset they couldnt fit the resolution in V7

Good news i think this means were getting it in V8. I dont get why hes pulling away but most of the theories ive seen are he's scared of her dying so if hes really focus on everything but her she'll be okay (idk yall theres gotta be more than that. Id love have it be Ren is aroflux but i dont think the crew would have that be the reason)

[fairycosmos]

this is dark but i need to discuss it w someone. you ever wonder why some people who havent suffered half as much as others have the balls to kill themselves and the rest dont? i know pain isnt a competition but honestly. ppl have killed themselves for sooo much less than all the trauma and grief ive gone through since i was a child and yet im not strong? i think no one is stronger than someone who kills themselves to be honest. no one. but my pain is so big. why. others have needed less

yeah all the time :( tbh i don’t think this is one of those things that follows logical sense so trying to come up with a neat or all-encompassing answer probably won’t fly. but like for example ig, a few months ago i had a spiral and tried to d*e and for the week after i was so in shock at how i didn’t d*e - that almost messed me up more than the actual physical pain or emotional pain that got me there in the first place. it took me out of my mind. how truly trapped i am here and also how hard killing yourself actually is when it comes down to it, not bc you secretly want to keep going but because that’s all you know how to do. suicide goes against all natural and survival instinct, and i think thats why a lot of ppl don’t end up doing it. as well as lack of opportunity - if you have access to certain weapons or means it’s easier i suppose. or not easier but there’s just more of a convenient path. i think people are scared too, more than they realize until they are actually in the moment. maybe it varies from person to person, how big the pain has to be. but yeah honestly it’s cruel how hard-wired humans are to just survive, survive, survive even if with all of their heart they do not want to live anymore. like there’s ppl living in warzones or freezing out on the streets and they still just keep pushing forwards, and it is incomprehensible to me honestly. but also i guess suffering is relative, so what feels like the worst thing someones ever gone through, what’s enough to push them right over the edge, would not have the same impact on someone else w a different brain and viewpoint and personhood. and it doesn’t mean they’re weak for being hurt by something that another could shake off, because we all have an achilles heel. or numerous. anyway, i don’t mean this to sound stupid or patronizing, but you are strong. your brain can’t see it just like ppl who are actively suicidal can’t see a future despite one objectively existing. there are a million different types of strength and like you said, you have been THROUGH some shit. and still being here despite it all is honestly so commendable. yeah it’s difficult to die but it’s also very difficult to live, especially when life is consistently unkind to you. i really hope you’re doing ok, or as okay as can be expected, and that you know i’m rooting for you w all my heart. don’t hesitate to reach out for help if and when it’s available to you, if you ever need it. whether that’s through loved ones, a hotline, a support group, your doctor...you deserve happiness and stability and nothing changes that fact. sending love <3 so sorry you’ve had to deal w so much.