#i dont even use tiktok much

[blvckentropy]

We really live in a day and age where TikTok is more prioritized than people getting k*lled 🤔

[francy-sketches]

🌸💖💝jelly artstyle stannis 💝💖🌸

[aibouart]

admittedly, i am afraid to talk about this, but have wanted to for a long while. i don't see a lot of people discuss this kind of thing, but i decided to do so for the me who was struggling and didn't know. also i have no idea where i am going with this and it's very late for me rn so here's a whole ass ramble on vent art. and also a bit more on how it's impacting how i view my art, now. i am terribly sorry if it's not very cohesive, my thoughts on it aren't yet cohesive either WOOPS

i wanted to talk a bit about how vent art really impacted my mental health, and how the idea that art needs some kind of meaning to have meaning really has been weighing on me lately (i know this is a concept i am assigning to my work and is not actually the norm/standard expectation of others consuming art. but it IS a sentiment i have seen enough that does impact me).

i want to specify, obviously i am not saying vent art is bad.

nor that doing vent pieces, or vent blogs, will ultimately result in what i went through for a number of years. rather, that this did happen to me, and there is a near impossible chance i am a unique case in any experience i will ever have. if you do vent art and it helps you, that's good! im not judging anyone for anything here. if your experience does not match my own, that's what it's like to be human~. i am not invalidating anyone on purpose by sharing my own experience. sorry for the insane disclaimer but it will eat me alive if i go to sleep thinking "what if they think x cuz i didn't say y and think im a terrible person"

---

i used to do vent art frequently (you won't find much on here as it was uploaded to a personal at the time). anytime i felt down or had a line of dialogue in my head making me feel bad in a way, i would draw for it. but the way i had interacted with it was really unhealthy. it became a terrible feedback loop where i'd feel bad, draw how i felt bad, look at the art, and ruminate even more on how i felt bad, until it spiralled so out of control i would lose touch with reality and get lost entirely in feeling like garbage.

i would just get so lost in the cycle with vent art that it would make my mental space worse and worse, and i would use the vent art as a negative confirmation bias. the words that hurt me i wrote down and anytime i looked again, they would hurt me again. but i would keep looking, and i would keep drawing.

i have always used art as an outlet, but for some reason the way vent art impacted me was unhealthy. it wasn't a good outlet. and it took me years to cut ties with it. i relied on vent art for a long time, but it took a lot of introspection and thinking to realise it wasn't the release i thought it was. and it was hard to let go, too.

i haven't touched the blog in a few months, now. i haven't done much vent art at all since then and genuinely, i've been doing SOOO much better. i no longer ruminate nearly as much as i had done so, i no longer get caught in a feedback loop that lasts for days to weeks. i still feel like garbage like people tend to do, but i don't put myself in a cycle over it anymore. i have gone back to it a few times in moments of desperation, but what used to be every week/every few weeks is now once a month maybe. and not to the extent at all (i would oftentimes post ~20 images in one night, before).

but i keep thinking about how, while the way i had done vent art was bad for my mental health, i keep feeling that just because i do sparkly cute and happy drawings, now, or drawings with no real meaning, that my art has nothing beyond face value... i do like a lot of my vent art. i think their compositions, or hidden messages and meanings, or colour use, was interesting.

but it wasn't worth the price for me.

so i am a bit caught in an in-between, here. my favourite form of art is the expression of love-you liked something so much, you dedicated time to draw it. and yet i cannot ascribe that to my own work very often. i think that man i wish i could make art with some kind of deeper meaning, that speaks to people, that's more than just pretty colours or shiny shading or a character everyone likes, or a character i like. but i just... don't know if it's for me.

ultimately, i could develop a healthy relationship with expressing and exploring negative emotions or experiences through art, but... do i want to? do i have to? do i need to? is it not enough to just draw something because... i like it..?

of course, the answer is yes, draw what you want, draw how you want, it's your art. but i am still trying to come to terms with that idea. i dont want to be seen as some shallow artist who just draws what's cute and pretty because they can and it's all they can think of, but like what if that's just what i like to draw??

in the end, that alone is good enough, drawing because you like to, because it's fun, because you like the thing you're dedicating time to creating for. it's just hard to grapple with after discarding a type of art that i felt was the only way i drew "for real".

anyways i am sorry this is soooo fucking long, and for all the clarifications (IM STILL NOT SAYING VENT ART BAD AND EVERYONE WILL DO WHAT I DID!! Dx) and the fact i had no real point here (probably)

anyways i will continue to draw what i want because i like to, as i have always been.

[carcarrot]

having another one of my job-related crises

[evilkaeya]

just saw someone call skk nonbiological siblings....

[ducktollers]

i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images i hate you ai images I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

SOMEONE MADE A TIKTOK EDIT WITH YOUR ART!!!!

I was watching a Welcome Home tiktok compilation [cause I don't have tiktok] and I just seen your art and was so surprised-

Here's the tiktok comp it was in! The tiktok with the edit of your art starts at 2:45!

IM LAUGHING SO HARD WHAT THE FUCK

i don't know how to feel beyond Way Too Perceived and also Wheezing

[hauntingrabbits]

Uhhh . I just wanted to ask if u were okay with reposts on other social media platforms? Cause I just saw one on tiktok and though it DID give you credit . I just wanted you to know just in case you were unaware 😬

Agh, thanks for letting me know. I have mixed feelings about it. Honestly for my fanart if people asked for permission first (+added the credit and made sure not to crop out my signature) I'd be fine with reposts (though it does make me sad I don't get to directly see peoples reactions and interact with them) but I wasn't reached out to at all, so I am a little unhappy to hear this. It's credited though, so whatever, its fine I guess. Could you send me a link if you still have it?

[honexjams]

tryna eat vicariously thru food snapchat stories cos we aint got good food in the house and its pissing me off so bad every other video is 'girlhood is unbottoning ur pants after dinner' 'this is how single girlies eat' 'my girlfriend when i take her to eat' 'girlies when they eat together' 'how girls eat alone' i think tiktok is a poison. what is the insane focus on how grown women eat why is it framed like hash tag girl life every time who are you people

[savetheghost]

wanna be put in a room with craft stuff for 10 years

[sunnimint]

Just saw my sister with a starbucks cup. Very upset with her.

Overpriced coffee is NOT, and will NEVER be, worth the lives of Palestinians

please keep boycotting. i promise it's not that hard

[bedforddanes75]

my issue with terminology discourse isnt that i think everyone's stupid and sensitive it's that literally nobody explains the meanings of things and then get pissy when people dont know what things mean

[sambusa]

Hey, this is Taylor from a few years back. Sorry for the ask. I haven't used this app in a few years and forgot how to message lol. I was looking through my old account and saw yours was still up and running, and I just wanted to tell you thank you for the time you were my friend and how patient you were with me. You were a great friend and an even better influence. Hope you're doing good!

This was such a wonderful surprise... I have so many words and yet none at all. Thank you for being my friend, too, and for the kindness you showed me. I hope the future has treated you kindly 🥹🫶🏾

[hella1975]

me and my (also bi) flatmate were talking about date guy last week and out of nowhere she goes 'if you get a boyfriend im gonna be so annoyed we haven't even done anything gay together yet' and like i laughed it off but i keep remembering it bc we dont have a flirty friendship AT ALL like even in the moment it came WAY out of left field and im just here like hold on was gay shit ON THE TABLE??? NO ONE TOLD ME

[s0urcand1es]

this is going to sound really pretentious but are you ever talking to a dude and its like "wow they rlly don't get it"

[that-gay-computer]

we should normalize talking abt big feelings methinks