#i dont even know if im making sense
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So I doubt anyone is going to see this, but on the off chance someone does, I could use some help.
So a question to the aromantics and/or asexuals. How do I tell my girlfriend of 2 years that I think I may be aroace but still want to be in a relationship with (although in a slightly different way)?
Like I've tried to tell her I'm asexual, but I don't think I was direct enough. And I am way too terrified to bring up the fact I may be aromantic.
Not to mention, how do you know if you're aromantic?
Like I'm freaking out, and could use some advice from someone who is experienced with this.
Plz help.
#aromantic#asexual#aroace#ace questioning#aro questioning#send help#please help#pls help#im panicking#lgbtq community#lgbtq#lgbtqia#lgbtq+#lgbtqia+#identitiy crisis#need advice#lgbt advice#pls#i might literall cry#typing this while halfway to a panic attack#i dont even know if im spelling things right#i dont even know if im making sense#ahhhhh#help
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The cishet vanilla mind cannot comprehend wanting to platonically fuck your friend. Wanting to so deeply engross yourself in your wholesome love for them that it turns to something more sinister. It's like a pathogen in the body that is seldom noticed in small numbers, but becomes infectious once it grows to a larger size. I'm not infatuated in the slightest, but I don't know how else to release this energy. I don't know how else to express my intense desire for you other than to sexually please you.
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#a doodley#saw franchise#saw 2004#i never know what bg color to use for stickers...does anyone have any ideas... i feel red Or ''black'' wld blend in too much...?#even tho it wld make sense to be one of those...#i dont think i want it to just be white :/#i rarely do solid color bgs on stuff bc im so bad with colors loll
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kiss the pain away
#vashwood#trigun#trigun stampe#vash the stampede#wolfwood#nicholas d wolfwood#ep 10 was crazy bc vashwood was literally the plot goodbye#i like how the most intimate moment between these two was in the goddamn sewers#i feel like that alone symbolizes so much in their relationship. im half joking BUT ITS JUST LIKE#the SPONTANEITY the PRIVACY they get in such an open Space while being literally chased / hunted after....#and vash is out here showing his scars.............. and ill always lose my mind that they gave this spotlight to wolfwood instead of#meryl and milly like in the previous versions. i dont know how else to read this other than that wolfwood is the romantic interest of stamp#it makes sense even aside from this scene. u know. wolfwood was technically the damsel in distress in ep 5-6 and vash saved/helped him.#and who stayed in the bedroom with vash.................#who rushed to his side when he got shot...... with that worried ass expression....#i dont have anything smart to say at all im just gushing over vashwood thru stampede bc its just so blatant. and its great that its blatant#bc it was blatant in trimax too. like so blatant. the romance was written in every chapter they showed up together#god#ive never witnessed a pairing more canon without being spoken as such its soooooo much theyre so much#ruporas art
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maffhew who refuses to say runebergin torttu because he knows hes gonna butcher it so bad he might be kicked out of the country the second he tries and staunchly avoids that by going "the one dessert that barky is going to have to explain 😃"
sasha who gets faced with the most generic description of everything hes ever eaten in his life so far because of maffhew and going "???... oh you mean runebergin torttu!"
"he did good he liked the food and he likes the finland so far so its good" sasha says with so much pride now that all the anxiety has left his system that his husband teammate is enjoying his country and doesnt hate it
media availability | 10.29.24 (x)(x)
the smile of a man who knowlingly doomed his husband and said husband using all his brain power to context clues his way to whatever the fuck he just got asked that his brain is running hotter than a mid 2012 macbook air thats somehow still alive in the year of the lord 2024 but girl does she chug along shes louder than a fighter jet
#matthew tkachuk#aleksander barkov#florida panthers#2425#the famous vanha kauppahalli date™#we know how bad he is at pronouncing words not in english he does not want to fuck up his husbands language in front of him#(the nhl stars try to speak german video has entered the chat)#different attitudes here lmao#“he did good” mate he was... eating food... what... what is there to praise here..?#i shivered sweet mary and joseph sasha this is how you praise maffhew? yeah id be an annoying little shit about it too#whatever they have. unexplainable. i wont even bother#im glad to see pie and cake are still very confusing for esol#somehow ive had the conversation with several different people in my lifetime and realised even i dont know what the fuck it is#in the sense that when i translate pastries into english for my american friends i just pause and go#wait... i think this is a pie... but its called a tart in spanish but its also kind of a cake? and- [windows reboot sound]#ive had to do this with pastafrola and im like please just eat it dont make me explain im gonna cry if i do#I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS IN AN ENGLISH CONTEXT BECAUSE IT DOESNT EXIST IN AN ENGLISH CONTEXT TO ME JUST EAT IT#“so whats the difference between a torta and a tarta and isnt a tarta kinda like a pie-” “stop asking questions you dont want answers to”#you have no idea how upset i get trying to explain#im glad sasha at least protrays a little of that frustration by going “i dont know english word” girl SAME
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It's kind of funny (heartbreaking) that there were multiple Ravens who wanted a number, to the point where some tried to manipulate Jean into helping them one way or another, but none of them would have been next in line. No matter what they did, there was always someone ahead of them on the list. Someone who wasn't even on the team. That someone wasn't Neil. Neil was a surprise to everyone, including Riko. That someone was Andrew.
Kevin might have had to beg Riko to go visit Andrew, and Riko might have laughed at Kevin and dismissed Andrew when Andrew turned him down, but make no mistake, if Andrew had accepted and had become a Raven, he would have taken that #4 spot within his first year.
If we're being real, Andrew had more of a chance at becoming part of the perfect Court than any of those Ravens ever had. Even Jean thinks of Andrew as one of them.
The other Ravens never stood a chance.
#i honestly dont think any of the ravens stood a chance#if they werent inked within their first year (or begore it) then they prob never would have been even if riko lived and the nest continued#riko (and kevin) seemed to choose people to recruit already knowing they'd be perfect court#like riko tried to get neil to join the ravens already knowing hed make him perfect court (in order to keep a claim on him)#and i fully believe kevin scouted andrew with full intentions of making him perfect court#so none of those other ravens who were torturing jean ever stood a chance#it was all for naught#idk if this makes any sense#it's like 12:30am where i am and im just rambling lol i should be asleep#anyway#aftg#all for the game#the sunshine court#the sunshine court spoilers#tsc spoilers#tsc#andrew minyard#neil josten#jean moreau#riko moriyama#kevin day#perfect court
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warlock wizard Wally scribbles... Thinkings! oh and a bonus bard-ish Barnabys in the corner for flavor
outfit ramblings:
first of all that is a Terrible rendition of what Home looks like in my head. i just needed to fill empty space </3
the staff was the toughest part honestly. bc it Had to be paintbrush-themed, but then halfway through scribbling i was like "oh shit. there are only so many ways to draw a paintbrush-wizard-staff and Weevmo already hit it out of the park." so if you're seeing similarities! you're right! i tried to make it as different as i could! there is Inspiration from their marvelous design, however accidental or subconscious! Apologies!
he gets a pointed hood instead of a hat because a) it looks great on him! and b) it has less of a chance of messing up his hair! also c) it helps muddle the difference between Wizard and Warlock. typically hoods have evil/duplicitous connotation - blur the lines! i want his long gloves and forearm wraps to have the same vibe. his neckerchief is a big help in hiding Home's seal!
his layered (loosely apple-themed) capelet (which the hood is attached to) has a nice high collar & hides the details of his loose shirt - eye embroidery! and some flowers on the shoulders but yk, mostly eyes. on one side of the shirt buttons has open eyes, the other side they're closed! there's also one big eye on his back!
his belt buckle is two halves of an apple! he wears tall thigh-high boots w/ low heels to feel Taller! he has a book-holster hooked to the back of his belt, which holds his grimoire! and he has a lil thigh-bag that has been magicked to be Bottomless and warps size! he can fit pretty much anything in there! canvases! paint! apples!
his half-skirt thing (idk what the word for it is!) is really plush, like a quilt - his capelet is the same fabric. soft, cozy. sometimes he'll use the skirt thing as a blanket in a pinch, or as a picnic placemat!
is his outfit a little Complicated? is it annoying to replicate? yes and yes. but im a maximalist at heart and Nothing But The Best for the blorbo <3 layers my beloved <3
#i know ive said it before but whenever i make an au its essentially an Exploration in a sense#and this fantasy au ~Bog Edition~ is basically me going#'so wally and his house huh. whats up with that'#and maybe im taking it a bit to the extremes#since home is pretty much warlock wally's god??? sorta? loosely??#well it literally gave wally life and a body. so.#and it also literally took the place of his heart - wally Cannot live without home#they have a fun 'we cant exist without each other now' codependent very devoted kinda unhealthy relationship#wally sometimes has to do terrible things for home#and home will do terrible things in return for wally. even when wally doesnt want them to#and they both love each other very much <3 what kind of love is it <3 fuck if i know! theyre Weird About It though#its the only dynamic an ancient lovecraftian horror & the puppet they gave life & tethered itself to can have!!!#wally wisely keeps home & his 'warlock' status a secret from his friends for as long as he can#they just dont understand his & home's bond smh#scribble salad#welcome home#wh fantasy au#gonna have to workshop barns....#i need to balance the fantasy + hes a distinguished fella + bard#hence the hat. the hat stays.#gotta find the right vest...#and then everyone else if i feel like it....#outfit design is so Grueling but i refuse to keep it simple#there have to be LAYERS it has to be IN CHARACTER i have to put ALL THE EFFORT INTO IT
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the twins ever
#nooo fern you couldve had a bonding moment noo#also imagine the lines where they speak at the same time being perfectly synced.#like. unnaturally so.#finn finds it amusing#fern hates it#adventure time#fern the human#finn the human#my art#i dont know if this makes sense even im tired
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5+1 maxiel fic in which one of them tries to sext with the other but the other doesn't realize and derails the conversation
daniel asking max what is he wearing and max going on a rant about how people needs to stop teasing him for wearing branded things because it's convenient and he's comfortable and people need to fuck off
max telling daniel he is in bed thinking about him and daniel tells him oh you know what I'm thinking about? and then he's thinking about this monkey he saw in an outdoor shower once on vacation
daniel telling max he's cold in his hotel bed and if max was there he would warm him up and max starts scolding him for never packing warm enough and daniel if you are cold you can of course ask the hotel for another blanket or not sleep naked
max saying he's bored and he doesn't really feel like doing anything and he'd like if daniel was there and daniel tells him to go on a hike and starts planning one for him because he can't stay coped up in the sim room all day
daniel telling max he wishes he had something in his mouth during a zoom meeting and max comes into the room to give him a sliced apple
and then +1 max texts daniel 🍆💙? and it's all it takes
#coming to you from my failed attemp to bait my boyfriend into sexting#he literally told me to go touch grass i dont even know what to say#anyway after that. im going to bed#my writing#i guess? sort of at least#maxiel#im writing this at 2:30 am on my phone so if there are typos no there arent and also if it doesn't make sense yes it does
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did i post tgis here
#john egbert#june egbert#karkat vantas#junekat#johnkat#homestuck#ill be honest i actually had no idea what to put in the speech bubble and made this at like.... i dont even know like 2 am?#does it make sense? probably not. im tired
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Desert duo but they are married just for the benefits.
(No one tell them there are no benefits to being married in minecraft.)
#aroace desert duo specifically#they are friends but they got married just for the fun of it#qpp desert duo even#im normal about them i promise#also i dont know how marriage works or what benefits there would be. smt with taxes or whatever#idc#im not getting married any time soon SO#NOT MY PROBLEM#pretend it makes sense okay? okay imma go sleep now#stiff talk#gtws#grian#desert duo
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breaking my silence on chess the musical to say that i would literally not give a fuck about this show if i thought it was good or fully successful at what it is saying. SORRY! i love how messy she is. i love how since 1984 and continuing to this very day people with entirely different perceptions of and opinions on the musical have attempted in their own ways to "make it good" by creating all these different versions with like notably different plots, characterization, and song order, and i love how fucking bad the vast majority of these are despite it all. i hope people keep trying to fix chess the musical forever and until the end of time. i hope no one ever figures it out. i want every currently living theatre director in existence to make their own version and for all these versions to come out on broadway at the same time, making that year's musical season entirely comprised of various different versions of the cold war chess musical by tim rice and half of abba. i want not only our greatest minds but also our middlest-of-the-road and worst minds to come up with their own conclusions as to why chess does not entirely work in its original form or any subsequent forms like to really think about it and yes i do want someone to dedicate their entire life to perfecting chess by releasing version after version after version until they die peacefully but still, as always, in the grips of obsession. i want marriages to be broken up. i want mental states to be shattered. i dream of this world
#it speaks!#ive said this on another platform but i dont like using that platform none of my friends are there. so you all get the expanded version.#pearl's chess rant: deluxe edition. and im not even finished.#i want at least one intrepid director to do what ppl do with shakespeare and set it in a completely different era ->#<- & change the central political conflict but not enough so its still like. well now this is about medieval feudalism why is it also ->#<- still about a chess proxy war ... that just makes no sense. it just doesnt make sense ........#'breaking my silence on chess the musical' sam knows i think about it still. but for the purposes of public appearance. you understand.#chessposting#chess the musical#<- real ones know i rarely maintag but i want all seven active chess fans to see this bc i need their insights
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"shipping saiki is aphobic because he's aroace!"
stares at you with my demiromantic asexual in a committed relationship eyes then looks at the camera like im in the office
#good thing those folks have yet to find their way into my inbox or id be at risk of embarrassing myself lol#if you wanna see more of the content you prefer...make it yourself :3 MAKE IT YOUR FUCKING SELF lol#youre so attached to the idea youll complain about it but you refuse to do anything about it even create works that you and others will sur#ly enjoy how does this even make sense#sorry for reviving this from the dead when it blessfully hasnt been a thing in the tag for a hot moment but im still irritated hahahah#seriously you know what that screams to me? virtue signalling. you wont do anything except say a few words every now and again like#the motivation starts and ends at appealing to the popular opinion. earn your brownie points. and do nothing.#what is your care made of? thoughts and prayers?#every time ive asked one of these people why they dont make the content themselves the response has been 'i shouldnt have to lol'#you shouldnt have to bully people either with your aphobic BS but look at you! aw~#yall dont wanna commit to shit you just want to tell other people how they should exist.#if you cant create for whatever reason you better be ready and willing to drop your rec list and fave artists. and i sure as shit hope your#complimenting them thoroughly.
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something something i will follow you into the dark (comic wip)
#this comic isn't angst i promise. maybe#another wip because im an impatient person at heart and i've been working on this comic since JANUARY#arrrghhh why isn't it done? i say#knowing full well it's not done because i kept not working on it#zukka#zuko#sokka#mywips#i dont' even know if this panel makes sense out of context#i thought i'd get this done by sunday but there's no way that's happening so here. have another wip on what's apparently a wip account now#okay i was just putting that song as a title because it popped into my head bc of the way they were standing but it made me look up those#lyrics and damn. that's a zukka angst song right there ill tell ya#“love of mine someday you will but i'll be close behind” sobs#cause we'll hold each other soon
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cats: in bath robes
the nhl: well i guess we have to put provactive "lively" music over it
2024 nhl global series finland game 1 | 11.1.24 (x)
#niko mikkola#eetu luostarinen#nate schmidt#matthew tkachuk#anton lundell#gustav forsling#aaron ekblad#carter verhaeghe#sam reinhart#aleksander barkov#mackie samoskevich#florida panthers#2425#swaggy shirtless jumpscare?#sometimes i do forget he opened up the robe as he walked into the hall and i got duly reminded of it (i screamed)#the music choice...#i feel like im waiting for my coffee order in a mundane coffeeshop and notice the stairs leading down into the basement level.#the entrance is cover by a beaded curtain and im curious about the muffled music.#i pull back the beaded curtain and the muffled music is brassy. theres a stage.#and oh my god i just walked into a speakeasy racy burlesque show and the girls on stage just- oh jesus christ oh fuck oh fuck#and i skedaddle back up the stairs like hell is nipping at my heels AND I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE#does that make sense#alternatively you know that suite life on deck episode its exactly like how that cabaret episode made me feel#IM SORRY THE MUSIC CHOICE WHAT 😭😭😭😭#ENDING WITH SWAGGY IS DEVIOUS#STARTING WITH MIKKSY IS EVEN WORSE#IM JUST A POOR PATHETIC THING PLEASE DONT DO THIS TO MEEEE
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okay i typed this in a reply but i need to say this more detailed here too, the way totk dealt with horses (and stables) is bad and worse than botw imo (yes i can rant about that too, these weird choices are in every little spot in totk, its almost impressive)
in a game that lets you build cars and stupid flying maschines, towers that shoot you into the stratosphere AND teleporting points all over the place, the chance is already low that you use a horse- though i would be one of them bc i love horses and hate building and didnt find it fun at all-
(also i almost never used any parts i had with me bc you cant put them back and your dumb vehicles despawn as soon as you dont look at them- also a negative thing about that system that reinforces the feeling of actually using it being more punishing than rewarding with the added bonus of the good ol saving your health potions forever problem)
-and something i DID like was that you can have more horses and the ... one.. new color (the lil spots but only AFTER you do that one quest in the spy post)
the stable points seemed like a neat idea, but like so many things, are utterly cheatable, imo the system should have only given you a point when you visit a new stable, so you actually have to go around and visit them all
(also .. add new stables, like mini ones or sth that dont offer beds- you dont need that anyway- so you have more places in which you can get them ... why did they remove some of them anyway, shouldn there be MORE now that the land is supposedly healing/being repaired? especially the one next to the big canyon, its so empty there it would have the perfect place for sth like a new settlement or a big boss arena but no its more empty than it was before, why?? and then putting yet another repeating annoying quest there in that weirld empty place?? i just dont get it)
letting you farm points by sleeping at a stable or bringing in a horse gives you LESS incentive to actually go around the world bc you can just farm it there
(and if that was done so youd 'discover' the malanya talks to you in your sleep 'secret' ... that is literally told to you, and if its bc you dont want to force players to go around and find every stable to get all those rewards ... why do you have 140 or whatver caves then with the majority of them being the literal same thing over and over ... to make people actually use the sleeping thing there? .. why, who uses that anyway, and farming points by sleeping there .. what the hell does that add? AND THEN the stupid sleep over tickets, probably the most nothign reward ever, dont count?? i dont think i ever used one- it just all doesnt make any sense, everything plays against each other)
the upgrading system for your horse is .. once again, a neat idea horribly executed, you have to go find malanya to upgrade them, and similarly stupidly like the fairies, they only tell you what food you need for what upgrade when you are there .. or when you are sleeping in the special tm bed at a stable, randomly, one food, bc the quantity changes too
which is just so ??????????? let me go and do a quest that rewards you with a lil booklet in which you can look up what an upgrade costs, or let the stables have that, either as a list or in the menu when selecting a horse or something?? (also why the hell is malanya in a different spot anyway, like, it feels like a modder just plopped them over there, their og spot is just empty now - except for yet again a stupid filler quest for .. another big horse and a yaaaaaaaaays crystal shrine quest- ... the spot is even still called spring of the horse god .... its so stupid, just like the fairy shuffling around, like you really couldnt think of a better way to reuse that concept other than to ... move it to a different spot in the same map and map level???? and not change anything in their og spot except idk, put a hole in the map ... for one of them like .. its like they moved them around last minute just to have the semblance of things being 'changed' with no regard what makes a change actually feel like one and what just feels like, pick up thing, click on random spot on map, drop thing- its like that for the fairies and shrines too, its so dumb and .. feels disrepectful to botw and how much thought seemed to have went into these spots that were clearly built about those things)
and like it couldnt get WORSE, they cut off the paths that horses follow automatically with one of those miasma buttholes (sorry its just a hole cut into the map, it doesnt even look like miasma burst through, it just .. cut out) a monster camp (that RESPAWNS, i thought those camps you clear with a quest would stay clear, but that would make sense, so of course it respawns and you can do the frame rate killer quest over and over yippieee) or otherwise like, with a big rock or a broken bridge-
and there is NO WAY to create a new path or fix or move anything in a game ABOUT BUILDING supposedly, like you needed more reasons to never use a horse????? i liked jsut hopping on and letting them follow a path and chill looking at the landscape, you cant do this here, and you cant even excuse it with 'its bc of the theme' as in, stuff is destroyed bc calamity 1.5 or whatever bc nothing in the game makes it feel like theres anything actually at stake, but the real crime is to make it not be fixable. WHY??? link moves entire buildings with ease but cant move one freaking rock that fell into a river?????? you swing around logs like a club but cant fix a bridge so your horse can get over it??????????????????????????????
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#totk critical#i know i know its long#and you may wonder how i can find things to rant about yet#and i swaer im not trying to find thigns to hate#but igven how much it reuses from botw#imporvement or at least meaningful change should be the minimum and they just ......dont .... again#like WHY this is so dumb.................#the more i try to get my feelings into coherent thoughts about this game the more i realize just how rushed it feels#even the detail or side mechanics either dont make sense#or have some sort of way to cheat around way too obviously to be something overlooked#or are poorly integrated#or cheapen antoehr function#like these problems are everywhere#and the longer you look at it the cheaper it looks#even if you love the game and dont mind it or whatever there is NO WAY to justify that price tag#and so wish they were honest about what happend#it cant just all be covid can it? theres so much wrong in every part except for sound and music#and so desperately want to know WHY#........ i just wanted more horse colors- more horse slots- and a lil pasture somewhere where i can see them all frolicking around#i feel like thats not too much to ask
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