#i don't want drama anymore
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heyyy (with rizz) just here to say i. exist i guess. im new to tumblr so please be nice thats all i’m asking 👍 didn’t make an account here to end up like on twitter lmao btw don’t be shy to tell me if i ever do something that’s considered like a faux pas or something!!! im very new here and it’ll probably take me a while to get all the hints excited to make new friends on here :]
#new on tmblr#please bare with me#i don't want drama anymore#i was told about the tags but i have NO idea how this works please help
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the perfection this episode was
#jinshi to lakan in the ln: and what if i don't want her anymore#jinshi now: dilwale dulhaniya le jayenge#no really this was such a good addition#and all the officials bowing to him aaaaaaagh#and that song double aaaaaaaaggghhhhhh#we really are in a chinese court drama#kusuriya no hitorigoto#the apothecary diaries#anime#lakan#jinshi x maomao
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DAY 4: DRAMA - Put on your prettiest face for the masses!
gonna start adding silly captions actually. [POINTS ACCUSINGLY] MELTY FUCK (AFFECTIONATE)!!
#disco elysium#drama#de drama#disco elysium skills#skilltober#skilltober 2024#de skills#voliart#GUY WHO IS GOOP AND SPOTLIGHTS!! he can form the lights into hands but usually theyre lights!! i think bottom left face is always sad :']#lmao i don't know why i was worried about posting on schedule with everyone. im VERY MUCH BEHIND hgkj but we stay silly!!#also BIG OOF GUY WITH ONE (1) SKILL POINT. NOT FILLED IN. THAT'S GENUINELY JUST ONE.#harry is a BAD LIAR. its really funny to me like all INTs are supposed to have 2 at LEAST??#but the Remote Viewer's Division thought LMAO sorry for nerfing you for fic reasons bud :']#to note: unfilled skill points also count as one! so if you see six skill points and three are filled that means 9 points total! :]#empty skill points are just the skill cap. technically even this is wrong since thoughts just remove from the number and not the diamonds?#but NEVERTHELESS i dont want to work on this anymore so let's carry on shall we?#i love his swept up chapter. empathy (highest level skill! 9 points!) and drama put on a little play together :3#and no one is jealoussss of anyone!!! certainly not!!! :)!!!#the thing about it is that i also have concept completely done too; EXCEPT for her quote caption!! so i'll just have to post xer later :']#alas <33 sleep time for voli!!
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uhaam. like a dog by ferry. rk noah. Am i insane
I saw this ask, blacked out, and woke up to this on my screen.
So I think we're both a little insane. (The song, for context.)
#for real i don't know how this ended up on my screen. someone send help.#anyway the joke of dog-themed songs has just become something more i guess? because that's eerily fitting.#it's not a joke anymore 😨😳#imo the song's a little more fitting for rk!alejandro? since it seems like it's from the perspective of someone holding power over the 'dog#and also likening themself to a dog as well i guess? but the singer definitely holds the majority of the power in their dynamic.#maybe i just want alejandro to tell noah he'll always come running back to him “like a wounded dog”. maybe i'm crazy.#maybe i'm born with it. maybe it's maybelline. 🤷♀️#also please don't mind me linking the 'lullaby' version it just has the clearest/most coherent vocals. 🙏#total drama#td alejandro#td noah#alenoah#rice krispies fic#ophe doodles#replies
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You're my World
Doesn't matter where we are as long as we're together.
New Pride Flags Makeup (AXL Edition) by @pinkyjulien 💛
#cyberpunk 2077#kerry eurodyne#kerry eurodyne x v#male v cyberpunk#masc v#vincent ezaki#cp2077#Cyberpunk2077#cyberpunk vp#cp2077 vp#cyberpunk photomode#virtual photography#my vp#otp: to bad decisions#;_____;#so happy about this updated mod and that I can slap these on them now whenever I want and also in combination aaaahhhh#like I said last year with my pride pics - I don't think that kerry doesn't really give a shit about labels xD#the medias are gonna say what they're gonna say anyway and create drama out of nothing#and he is comfortable in his own skin and doesn't see a need to label himself in whatever way#so he isn't all that into going to pride anymore (even if that was probably very different when he was younger)#vince though who couldn't be himself for a too long time goes every year and loves to celebrate it with others#even if he tends to be a bit more private about personal information otherwise - so this is a great opportunity#to be himself openly and fully - because he is confident and comfy and anything but ashamed and wants to make sure people keep that in mind#and then of course kerry come's along to support him and maybe is even down to dress up a little bit#or will allow Vince to put some rainbow makeup on him at least - and in a way it's very cute and reminding him of when he was his age#and yeh uwu just sharing experiences and going places together and celebrating their love and all#cyberpride2024
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End of this chapter, from A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss by Qvill
#Space AU#Bdubs#Fanfiction#Please don't follow me expecting hermitcraft content#I don't know if I'll ever make anymore#A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss#I'm on a kick of wanting to draw scenes from various stories that I'm reading#The author's design for Glare!bdubs looks so huggable#Mines a bit more marvin the martian meets the swamp thing XD#I'm really excited for the next installment#if/when it ever happens#Like#Will bdubs be rescued immediately or will the pirates get him off the ship first?#Will they take away his Shroud??#The drama potential is so high#I hope at least one of the hermits calls Bdubs an idiot (affectionately) for his stunt#I really really like the descriptions/world building of the Glare#It gives me the same comfy feelings as those fuzzy aliens from a Wrinkle in Time#Hermitcraft#bdubbleo100#docm77#ZombieCleo#Keralis
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Saying Sanji is "straight-washed" might be the funniest thing in the whole world because yes, his character is heavily queer-coded and reflects queer experiences, and no, it is not about his sexuality. It's about his gender. You got it a bit wrong, bestie.
#and you mean to tell me..... the character known for liking women an insane amount... got straight-washed for liking women or???#even if sanji were canon bi that statement would be bi erasure bc bi people like women too that's- that's the fucking definition#sorry i know i said i didn't want to be in the drama anymore but it makes me angry#like i can see the layer of sexuality in his coding but it is def not the main thing#you can see him as gay ofc because his experience could reflect your queer experience that way but it is not canon what are you saying#you can tell me sanji is straight and i'll take it even if i don't believe it. but you cannot tell me he's cis i will fucking lose it then#one piece#black leg sanji
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Fuck it. Jumping on the "Prove the Pansear Screenshots weren't Faked" bandwagon. Seeing so many people blindly cheer and reblog that callout post legitimately almost made me delete my blog in fear. I don't blame Pan for deleting at all and don't think that's automatic proof of guilt. No one cared about any potential victims, no one cared if someone got hurt, they just bragged about how "they've always known" and that's terrifying. If the screenshots turn out to be true i'll retract my statement and apologize, but for now im just scared for the rw community and where its headed because this isn't good
I know Im not really a creator in the rw fandom anymore (mostly due to stuff like this tbh) but if just one person sees this and feels safer and seen then i'll be happy
#rain world#pansear#rw drama#I know Im risking getting harassed for daring to speak out but I just can't stand it anymore#I don't even really support Pan I just hate seeing fandom spaces turn into shit like this#This is not hate at the person that posted the screenshots I just want to know for sure someone was actually guilty and not just bullied of#I dont want anyone to be harassed I just want clarity#Who gave you those screenshots? What was the server even about? Why did you hold onto the screenshots to post it at 'the right time' ?#Why did you share a screenshot of someone literally asking if your group if they had dirt on Pan? Why isn't anyone else questioning this?#And its stupid I should even have to fear harassment just for wanting more evidence#but ive already seen someone make a callout post trying to intimidate someone into shutting up about wanting proof#and thats not normal!!! If your truly wanting to see a bad person get away from your community you wouldn't be doing that??#hopefully I blocked enough people from that side of the fandom I wont get beaten to death but. Fucking. God
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haiiiii everyone. guess who's back with more mkulia :] i've written a sequel to beneath the stitching. it's got nightly reflections, years worth of yearning, and even more indirect kisses
#it's also 20k+ words but that's the least important thing here#total drama#mkulia#quackle writes#do you know how relieving it is to upload this thing. please take it away from me <3 i don't want it anymore
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this is a genuine question not at all meant as a rude gotcha, but I feel like I've seen lots of people cite the relatively low barrier of entry as a huge advantage of podcasts as a medium, "if you have access to decent audio tech you can make a podcast" etc etc. So where does the need to sell a script come in? Is it a financial thing, and IP thing, something else?
this doesn't read like a rude gotcha at all, it's a really good question! there is a much lower barrier to entry when it comes to podcasts compared to tv, film, theater, etc. (though not as low as writing a book if we're talking about hard resources - you can technically write a book with just a laptop and a dream and then self publish! though as a writer who has written a lot of scripts and four books (3 published) writing a book is a much bigger psychological burden imo lol).
the need to sell a script, for me, is entirely a financial thing. if I had the money to produce podcasts at the level I want to entirely independently, I would! I know how to do it! but, unfortunately, I really only have the funds to produce something like @breakerwhiskey - a single narrator daily podcast that I make entirely on my own.
and that show is actually a great example of just how low the barrier is: I actually record the whole thing on a CB radio I got off of ebay for 30 bucks, my editing software is $50/month (I do a lot of editing, so this is an expense that isn't just for that show) and there are no hosting costs for it. the only thing it truly costs me is time and effort.
not every show I want to make is single narrator. a lot of the shows I've made involve large casts, full sound design, other writers, studio recording, scoring, and sometimes full cast albums (my first show, The Bright Sessions had all of those). I've worked on shows that have had budgets of 100 dollars and worked on shows that cost nearly half a million dollars. if anyone is curious about the nitty gritty of budgets, I made a huge amount of public, free resources about making audio drama earlier this year that has example budgets in these ranges!
back in the beginning of my career, I asked actors to work for free or sound designers to work for a tiny fee, because I was doing it all for free and we were all starting out. I don't like doing that anymore. so even if I'm making a show with only a few actors and a single sound designer...well, if you want an experienced sound designer and to pay everyone fairly (which I do!), it's going to cost you at least a few thousand dollars. when you're already writing something for free, it can be hard to justify spending that kind of money. I've sound designed in the past - and will be doing so again in the near future for another indie show of mine - but I'm not very good at it. that's usually the biggest expense that I want to have covered by an outside budget.
but if I'm being really honest, I want to be paid to write! while I do a lot of things - direct, produce, act, consult, etc. - writing is my main love and I want it to be the majority of my income. I'm really fortunate to be a full-time creative and I still do a lot of work independently for no money, but when I have a show that would be too expensive to produce on my own, ideally I want someone else footing the bill and paying me to write the scripts.
I love that audio fiction has the low barrier to entry it does, because I think hobbyists are incredible - it is a beautiful and generous thing to provide your labor freely to something creative and then share it with the world - but the barrier to being a professional audio drama writer is certainly higher. I'm very lucky to already be there, but, as every creative will tell you, even after you've had several successes and established yourself in the field, it can still be hard to make a living!
anyway, I hope this answers your question! I love talking about this stuff, so if anyone else is curious about this kind of thing, please ask away.
#lauren writes things#audio fiction#producing#also I say I don't like doing it anymore#but that's exactly what briggon andrew and I are working on#it's gonna be a show where we just split profits equally bc I can't afford to pay them lol#and I'll be sound designing it myself#so apologies in advance#also my GOD lauren can you be succinct once in your GODDAMN LIFE#why are all my posts so long i'm so sorry#also I don't get into it in this post#but using my book example as a jumping off point#obviously it is MUCH more complicated than that#bc self publishing/promoting/etc.#and writing the book in the first place!#is an ENORMOUS effort#as is making an audio drama!#also the grand irony in this#is that the show i was referencing in my original post is a show i first came up with to do independently lol#a two person show for briggon and andrew in fact#and then I happened to mention it to some producers I know and they liked it#so that's a show I COULD make for no money!#but they want to pitch it out and there's no harm in asking around#and in the meantime i just came up with another show for briggon and andrew haha#lauren answers things
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It's good to know that i'm not the only one who went throught the rain world to ultrakill hyperfix pipeline. i had enough of being a little clueless animal and dying in the most embarassing way possible, it's time to KILL
#ani.txt#i wanted to say something else instead of “time to kill” but uh. i'm not sure if you guys are ready for my dirty jokes yet lol#also kinda unrelated but#so far the ultrakill community seems to be a lot more chill compared to everything i experienced with the rain world community#imma be honest with you guys i don't enjoy being in this fandom as much anymore#mostly after the... thing that happened recently#i don't feel safe in a community where starting harassment campaigns agains disabled kids and defending people who sexualize ferals#is completely normal to some people#i legit can't put into words how disappointed i am after all of this#this doesn't mean that i'm leaving the community. i still love this game a lot and met a lot of wonderful people during my time in the fand#but again. i no longer feel comfortable here due to certain things but i'm trying my best to avoid drama as much as i can#for the sake of my mental health#block button my beloved (you don't want to know how many people i have blocked only in the last month lmao)
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I realize I've been so flaky with responding to asks, finishing my drawings or fics I promised, etc. I've kind of been drifting in and out of tumblr without interacting much. Real life just finally started, and I need to build up a ton of motivation and find time before I can work on a fandom project. Just wanted to say that I'm still here and still working on stuff, just slowly.
#i'm speaking to a dead fandom but still lol. thought i'd disclose.#i've reached new levels of perfectionism with my art which prevents me from drawing or posting anything at all#and my writing has really changed in the last few years to the point where i don't feel a space for myself in fandom#not sure how to explain it i just don't feel like i really have a space on ao3 or tumblr or even discord. like i don't enjoy fandom -#- much anymore or any/all of the things that most people in the fandom enjoy.#not because of any drama or discourse that happened. i just genuinely feel like an outsider.#i'm still trying to get myself to write because i have so many unfinished projects i want to post#but at this point it's like. writing to a brick wall?#i don't want to be an author who stops posting because my works don't get enough interaction or whatever. the tog fandom -#- is in a quiet period. it's gonna happen. esp with the way fandom is nowadays.#so i don't want to do that to the people who actually read and love my work#i just want to express how hard it really is to keep writing when you 1) feel you don't belong in fandom / are an outsider#and 2) have next to no interaction on your works.#maybe it would be easier to write and post if my wips weren't all long. i think that's also part of it.#so to the people who actually reblog my art and take the time to comment on my fics: genuinely i appreciate you so so much.
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i think i'm finally gonna read house of leaves wish me luck
#i've been meaning to read this book for like 5+ years lol#i think i'm finally ready to commit to it and also i just bit the bullet and bought a copy#because i know myself enough to know that i will not finish it if i get it from the library#and also they didn’t have the gravity falls book at the bookstore hahaha they said they’ve sold out of it twice#so. oh well. house of leaves time first#also i think i'm gonna finish fma brotherhood without my friend who wanted to watch it in the first place#out of spite because he's still being a little bitch#hope he doesn't change his mind! or feel butt hurt when i don't want to watch shit with him anymore#i think after all this i'm not gonna watch any longer series with him anymore#movies only. low commitment only. so he can't bail on me just on a whim#i'm enjoying fma a lot though!! these boys are the exact type of characters i get attached to lol#i like the alchemy shit also and the humor/drama balance#and the character design and the world building and the Lore#i was kind of on a movie kick again earlier this month but i just don’t have a lot of time for it rn#or the attention span. to be so honest#kind of embarrassing but i’m so mentally exhausted and i’ve been splitting my attention between a lot of different things lately#i was on such a reading kick this summer too!! hopefully house of leaves will replenish my energy for reading#i also got a sci-fi novel a nonfiction book and a folklore collection so i have plenty of new material rn#and i found another book that i want to reread soon#winter is gonna be a big reading time i am committing to that!!#anyway. that’s that
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Sometimes there's simply no such thing as being "neutral"
Everyone is allowed to hang out and befriend whoever they want; just as others are allowed to notice it and take their distances if needed
It's not even about ""choosing a side"", it's about reading the room, having critical thinking or realizing that things aren't always "personal beefs" - sometimes people are just assholes and shouldn't be comforted or encouraged in their behaviors; hell, if you're their friends, you should even call their bullshit out, that's what friends are supposed to do
and if you're too scared to call their bullshit out cause they might attack or bully you, well I don't think that "friendship" is worth it in the first place but y'know
#I'm getting a bit tired of this fandom's Neutrality you know#So called Neutral people have blocked me because I replied to wash and skd bullshit over my flat chest mod#So called Neutral people keep on supporting them and their tantrums as well#and I'm sorry but like I said in the past - if I see that you're enabling them I'll simply block you#and I won't interact with you anymore because this isn't being neutral at all 🤷♂️#there ARE actual neutral people who are just chilling in their corners without giving two shits about any dramas regardless#who are talking to whoever they want regardless of who have beefs with who - those people are thriving deadass#I'm not a neutral person 🤚 If I see a drama take place I can form my own opinion and take my own stance#ESPECIALLY if it affects a friend of mine or someone I appreciate - even if we don't interact#fandom wank#blah blah
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There’s something sort of patronizing and damn near infantilizing about the way stans (specifically stan twitter), will take something that isn’t that serious, or even is very serious, and will twist it as much as they possibly can, for pity and engagements.
I remember when that lie detector interview with Millie came out last year, and toxic stans of hers made it their mission to accuse the guy in the video of disrespecting Millie, when really it was all a bit? They were rushing to make posts saying, “this is so messed up! she doesn’t deserve this!!” And it’s like?? Are u guys serious rn??
And then there’s all that fucked up shit that happened with that grown ass man who groomed Millie and how a lot of hardcore stans of hers were making plot-twist edits with that horrid ig live he did??? All of that shit blew up and went beyond what it ever should have, and part of it was because a lot of those same toxic fans were out there low-key promoting a very private matter, for clicks???
Right after this happened, she deleted all of her old instagram posts (I think she’s returned recently), and still doesn't allow herself to be tagged in anything (again mostly hardcore fans there), and it’s pretty obvious to me that it's because at this point, not only does she have to watch out for people that hate her for no fucking reason and who actually mean to harm her, but she ALSO has to avoid so-called fans constantly acknowledging all the negativity surrounding her, for attention, with the guise that they support her.
Because like, do we seriously think she deleted all those sentimental posts from her past, to spite people that hate her?? No she did it to punish the so-called fans. That's the place where they could connect with her and she made a boundary that she couldn't let them into her life like that anymore.
Fans took something very serious, like as serious as it can fucking get, and were making it about stan wars. Anyone and everyone who makes one joke or one comment needs to be called out and brought down. Like it's just so obsessive and unhealthy and I get that a lot of these kinds of fans are children, and so there isn't much anyone can do. But still, it's ridiculous.
I support the notion that we should be calling out harmful behavior/language. But it eventually gets to point where it's like, what even is the point? Is there a point anymore? Or are we just speaking to speak, when no ones even saying anything? Are we seeing one negative comment and blowing it out of proportion as if everyone is saying that, to gain pity? Because it starts to get ridiculous.
In reality, people are gonna say what they want. Everyone with access to internet has the affordance of posting shit anonymously without any repercussions. That’s unavoidable. And these same people aren’t going to just be enlightened by someone calling them out. More often than not people like this want to upset others in the first place. They want a reaction. And so by constantly acknowledging their existence, and fixating on it, we're giving it to them.
And now ever since Noah has come out, we're sort of seeing something similar happening with him.
While he is getting unwavering support from a lot of people in his comments, there's undeniably a disgusting amount of homophobia being thrown at him as well.
And then somewhere in the middle of that spectrum, we have people making jokes, INCLUDING Noah.
And yet, the tag has suddenly went from unwavering support (as it should), to obsessing over any and every post/comment/joke that can be interpreted as somewhere between sarcastic, uninformed, mildly offensive and downright offensive, and we're acting like it's the end of the world.
There's no denying that all of this is overwhelming. It's a lot. And I don't blame people for speaking up when they truly feel that it's necessary. It's only natural to get defensive when you think someone is being wronged/harmed and you want to do what's right.
But again, to what point is it truly necessary to keep bringing attention to every single thing we come across that falls somewhere on that spectrum near negative?
Right now this space is filled with the negatives, even if it's coming from a good place. Do we think that Noah or Millie or any of the cast want to have to be confronted with negativity from all directions, even from the people that claim to just be fans trying to do the right thing?
It gets exhausting.
And now we're just seeing this stan twitter behavior create one big mess of delusion, with toxic Millie stans calling Noah a white sexist misogynist because he liked a TikTok referencing his coming out and the homophobic Millie meme?...
Is Noah only allowed to be open to unwavering support right now? Can he not make light of the situation, or are we just imagining that he's sitting there victimizing himself because of any and all of the negatives being thrown at him, that are never going to go away, no matter what he says or does? Because I honestly think that's the opposite of what he's doing or would even want to be doing.
And same with Millie, I don't think she sees anything and everything happening to her, and everything anyone is saying, and allows it to bother her anymore. Because how could she?? That kind of shit drains a person of their sanity.
Noah is out here not only liking TikToks joking about his coming out, he's still liking byler edits, still commenting on fans posts with a lighthearted positive attitude. He even mentioned Will in his post, so obviously he doesn't mind people making some comparisons between him and his character.
And yet here we are dwelling on everything negative we can get our hands on.
It's important to realize that the cast has seen the worst of the worst. And you can see that it's affected them. You can see they went from fairly public public figures to almost entirely private public figures, only interacting with fans when they have to, because they know a good portion of the trauma they experience comes from the fans themselves who just don't understand boundaries and common sense.
The most delusional aspect of all of this is that toxic stans are 100% convinced Millie and Noah hate each other... like they fully believe this lie they've told themself based on videos they've seen of them? Like they genuinely think they know her better than she knows herself I guess???
Now, I do want to say that I understand partly where these fans are coming from. Millie has went through absolute shit with this fandom. And it's mostly because she herself is known for saying stuff that causes people outrage. Whether it's a joke or a comment, that clearly just came off the top of her head, they'll flip it to something negative and use it as ammo to hate her. She doesn't deserve that. And I know a lot of her fans are coming from a protective place because they're so used to people hating Millie for no reason.
But even still, I don't think they realize they are a part of the problem themselves. And we are too whenever we allow ourselves to focus on the negatives, letting it practically consume us.
That sort of shit can make a person feel hopeless. 1 negative comment can outweigh 100 positive ones. And so imagine that by a scale of about a billion?
Again, I know a lot of fans mean well, but if you just take a moment to think about it, like really think about it, you'll realize that your energy would be much better directed elsewhere.
Instead of making dramatic intense posts that focus on all the negativity, BE THE POSITIVITY! Be someone that actually makes our community redeemable. Because again, we're no better than the worst of the worst if we're giving them all the attention, making the very people we're claiming to be supporting and defending, even more miserable.
And don't be surprised when s5 promo rolls around or any other event involves Millie and Noah interacting in a public forum, where they'll inevitably make jokes about all of this, arguably just as offensive as the ones we're getting worked up over right now
#stranger things#noah schnapp#millie bobby brown#tiktok#byler#i feel like this is controversial but it really shouldn't be#dude i remember when people were joking about mike looking at angelas boyfriend during the rink o mania scene#and milkvan stans on twitter were full serious#you’re shipping Mike with El’s abuser#who is shipping who? what?? like can we not just exist and talk about things without it being the most serious take on the planet??#or during noah's live recently he kept getting questions asking if he was friends with millie/the other cast or if they hated each other#and it got to a point where he was like#what is this? millie is my friend i'm friends with all my castmates#you guys are jut always trying to find the tea or stir the pot when there's nothing there#it's all just drama for the sake of drama and it's no wonder they don't interact with fans anymore#don't even get me started on bylers who get really condescending at random comments millie makes in interviews#it's not that serious i promise you#not to mention a lot of this stuff happened when they were kids so kids saying whats on their mind and being ripped apart for it is so?#gross#remember your online experience is whatever you want it to be#set boundaries with yourself if you have to#lord knows the cast is
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Sometimes a part of being a Christian who is/has gone through trauma and/or heartbreak is listening to a sad pop song and equating it to Jesus
#for those wondering i'm currently listening to 'take me home' by jess glynne and crying 🙃🙃🙃#it's the 'came to you with a broken faith; gave me more than a hand to hold; caught before i hit the ground;#tell me i'm safe you've got me now' and the 'would you take the wheel if i lose control; if i'm lying here would you take me home;#'could you take care of a broken soul; will you hold me now; will you take me home' for me 🙃😭😭💔💔#there's just a LOT of family stuff happening right now and everyone wants me in the middle of it like always#literally since i was a small child i've been put in the middle of family drama and problems#and i really thought i was at a point where we were done with that but apparently i was wrong#and it hurts#and i'm tired#and i don't want to do this anymore#but God got me through it before and He will again#it's gonna hurt but i'll be okay#christian#christianity#jesus#jesus christ#heartache#heartbreak#trauma#trauma survivor#music#songs#rant in the tags#personal
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