#i don't usually let myself do lighting like this 'cause it takes FOREVER!

[fluffyslug]

You know which episode this is set after, guys. D'you think Zeb ever kind of regretted coming back? Like, not seriously regretted, just wondered how much less annoyed he'd be on Lira San?

Also, space socks look exactly like earth socks?!? Yes. And Zeb is wearing a space Tshirt that looks exactly like an earth Tshirt. Stop questioning me.

[uzurakis]

as a fellow nagumo lover, how about i request nagumo saving reader (who’s also an assassin) while she’s badly injured and teasing her as she recovers 🙃

your eyes flutter awake, and you're greeted by the sight of yoichi nagumo lounging in a chair by your bed, his feet propped up on the edge. those dark eyes light up the moment he sees you stir.

"well, look who's decided to join the land of the living~!" he exclaims, a wide grin spreading across his face. awhile ago, you slowly regain consciousness, the beeping of the hospital machines faintly registering in your ears. the body of yours feels heavy and sore, memories of the mission flooding back; remembering the ambush, the fight, and then the pain. but most of all, you remember nagumo’s face, his expression uncharacteristically serious as he saved you. and you don’t see that often, never, actually.

you try to speak, but your throat is dry, and all that comes out is a croak. nagumo jumps up, leaning over you with an exaggeratedly concerned expression.

"oh no! have you forgotten how to talk? i guess i'll just have to handle all the conversation from now on," he says, feigning a dramatic sigh.

you roll your eyes, managing to croak out, "water."

he grabs a cup of water from the table, but instead of handing it to you, he holds it just out of your reach. "first, you have to answer a riddle. what has four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon, and three legs in the evening?"

"nagumo, seriously?" you rasp, your annoyance mingled with a slight, very tiny hint of amusement. man, i just woke up, you say in your head.

he only chuckles and finally gives you the water. "fine, i'll let you off this time. but only because you look like you’ve been through a meat grinder."

the cool liquid soothing your parched throat as you take a grateful sip. "thanks.. for the rescue," you manage to say.

nagumo waves his hand dismissively. "oh, don't mention it. just another day in the life of your favorite assassin."

don't mention it, he says with a casual wave of his hand, his trademark grin firmly in place. but beneath that easygoing facade, he's a whirlwind of emotions. the memory of finding you bleeding and unresponsive still haunts him, a gnawing fear that he might lose you forever. he can still feel the cold dread that settles in his stomach when you don't respond to his frantic calls, the way his heart pounds in his chest as he carries you to safety. every step is a desperate prayer that you'll hold on, that you'll survive. seeing you lying so still, so vulnerable, shakes him to his core. regardless of his lighthearted demeanour, he can't shake the residual anxiety of nearly losing you, the concern that one day his abilities may be worthless to keep you safe.

"favorite, huh?" you tease, a small smile tugging at your lips despite the pain.

"absolutely," he says, winking. "and you know, you gave us quite a scare. i mean, i had to carry you all the way back here. do you have any idea how heavy you are?"

you glare at him playfully. "maybe if you weren't so scrawny, it wouldn't have been a problem."

the guy laughs, the sound infectious. "touché. but really, you had us all worried. even sakamoto looked like he might actually break a sweat."

"i'm sorry," you say softly, feeling a pang of guilt for the trouble you caused. “i really thought it could handle them by myself. sorry..”

nagumo's expression softens for a moment, his usual levity giving way to genuine concern. "hey, don't apologize. i've got your back, and you've got mine. besides, it’s not like i’d let anything happen to my favorite partner, riiight? why are you looking at me like that?”

before you can respond, he suddenly leans in close, a mischievous glint in black pupils. "oh, by the way, did i tell you? i told the nurses you’re afraid of needles. so they might have a surprise for you when they come to change your IV."

your eyes widen in horror, and he bursts out laughing at your reaction. "relax, i’m kidding. or am i? guess you’ll find out soon enough."

"you rascal," you mutter, shaking your head.

"you owe me a box of pocky sticks," he says with a grin, leaning back in his chair.

despite the pain and exhaustion, you can’t help but smile. "i guess i do."

he reaches over and gently squeezes your hand. "get some rest. i’ll be here when you wake up. and who knows, maybe i’ll have another riddle for you."

"great," you say sarcastically, if it’s not for your injuries, maybe you’ve already thrown a pillow at his face. though, you know you can always count on him to be there for you, pranks and all.

@uzurakis

[whiteteadreams]

just imagine...

hyuck or mark

roommate au!

you're rearranging your room around to feel at ease again since it looks like a hurricane ran through it. moving causes a lot of commotion since it's loud and heavy so (hc or mk) come check up on you. it's obvious what're doing when they see you and you ask "can you help me finish up?" instead they ignore you and close the door right back up. so as a petty joke, you control the wifi, and pay for it. SO, WHEN YOU START HEARING POrN COMING FROM THEIR ROOM, YOU DECIDE TO TURN OFF THE WIFI JUST AS THEY'RE ABOUT TO GET OFF. ( then you enter their room while they're cursing about the wifi and meat is out like it's a show "since you won't help me finish up, i don't think i'll let you finish."🫢 SMuT PlS

Pairing: Roommate!Mark x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Genre: Roommates AU, Non-Idol AU, Smut

Warnings: Cursing/ mature language, smut, fluff at the end, not proofread

Smut Warnings: Degradation, Mark somewhat objectiying the reader, ripping leggings, creampie, unprotected sex

a/n- i simply have nothing to say for myself with why this took actually forever. also...self indulgent because I, too, like the reader, received a degree 😝

Boredom racked through your body as you checked your notifications. Reading through a text asking to go out on the town, you responded with a simple, “sorry, i’m busy tn :(“ despite your entire night being a destined repeat of your afternoon.

Looking over the side of your bed at your floor, you took in the scattered clothes, at this point you didn’t even know what was clean and what was dirty. Lifting your head, you saw the state of the rest of your room, which was equally or even more of a disaster as your floor. Your room had become a punching bag for your laziness as finals rolled around and with your new degree laying on the desk, you decided you had nothing else to do besides clean.

Rolling off your bed, your feet barely caught your body before you were able to fall flat onto your disgusting floor. You normally pride yourself on your cleanness but obviously this was not a good example of your usual self.

Still sluggishly, you forced your feet to drag you to your curtains, pulling them open to take advantage of the rest of the sunlight. Seeing your room in natural light for the first time in what felt like weeks finally forced you into the cleaning spirit.

Starting with the basics, you simply gathered all the clothes that were littered around your room and threw them in a basket, to be washed, whether that be completed today or another time was something out of your control.

Thankfully, your room wasn’t nearly as bad as you had thought it was, the clothes were the real issue here, but you still needed to clean your carpet, or at least vacuum. Staring down your giant dresser, you started to plan out how to move it.

Pulling at the sides, you felt your body jerk as it barely slid against the floor, but even though it didn’t move where you wanted it to, it did manage to bump your desk, which then hit the wall.

Over the music that had quietly been playing, your door cracked open and in popped Mark, your roommate.

“Yo, what are you doing? You’re being kind of loud…” Mark’s eyes raked across your backside before you turned around. Your leggings do nothing to avoid outlining your entire bottom half, even once you turn around, with your hands on your hips.

“Well, Marky, if I had to guess, it would appear I’m trying to move my dresser! And it wasn’t actually that loud.” Laughing at his wide eyes, thinking he was just overreacting the noise level, you turned around before stopping again. “Mark, would you mind helping me out?”

But as you looked over your shoulder for a response, you saw the boy leave the room.

Huffing at his departure, you went ahead and finished your cleanup, or at least you tried to before you heard what sounded like a squeak over in the next room. Deciding to be petty, you walked over to Mark’s room to complain about the noise level. But as you got closer and pressed your ear close to the door, you heard more than just squeaks which you were able to confirm were bed squeaks, you heard a few grunts, and then female moans. It was obvious that Mark was watching porn, and as a good roommate you would walk away, but you’re not really a good roommate.

Stifling your giggles, you waltzed to the living room to where the WiFi router was, and looking back at Mark’s closed door one last time you pulled the plug, cutting off the WiFi for the entire house.

“What the fuck?” A quiet voice sounded throughout the otherwise silent house. You allowed yourself to laugh loudly before just letting yourself into Mark’s room, not even giving him enough time to cover himself.

“Yo, what are you doing? You’re being kind of loud…” Using Mark’s words against him, his face turned red as he tried to grasp onto a blanket to cover himself. “Is this the reason you couldn’t help me? Too busy making yourself cum? I suppose, since you wouldn’t help me finish up, it’s only fair I don’t help you finish up.”

Turning on your feet, you started to walk out of Mark’s room before you felt his hand wrap around your wrist, pulling you back into him. You didn’t know when he stood up but now it didn’t matter as your back was to his bare chest, and your ass was against his bare cock.

“You’re really funny, you know that right?” Mark spoke through his teeth and then kissed the side of your head.

Spinning the both of you around, Mark pressed you against his desk, rutting against your ass as he breathed into your ear. “Maybe I would’ve helped you if you were wearing something a little more decent, instead you wear these tight ass pants that show exactly what your pussy looks like.” 

Gripping the thin fabric between his fingers, Mark tore the crotch of the leggings before pushing into your cunt.

“S’not my fault that you’re a fucking pervert.” Fucking back into Mark, you whimpered at the tight grip he had on your hips, surely leaving bruises to be seen in the morning.

Laughing against your head, Mark smacked your thigh at the comment. 

“I’m not, I just live with a little slut who walks around with her tits and pussy out, hard not to get hard when I’ve got cunt in my face.”

Your hair started to fall into your face as Mark’s thrusts increased in pace. But it wasn’t the reason why you couldn't see for long. You felt Mark readjust his grip on you before pulling out and throwing you on the bed. Bouncing lightly on the mattress you go to sit up but Mark, instead palmed the back of your head and pressed your face into the mattress, all while pulling your ass into the air so he can force his cock back into you.

Voice muffled by the blankets you tried to speak, but Mark gripped your hair into a ponytail and pulled your face back up. “You wanna repeat that?” He breathed out through his teeth.

“I said, who knew the good innocent child of God was such a pervert.” Mark didn’t even bother to respond, he just pushed your face back into the pillows and with his other hand landed several quick, sharp slaps to your ass.

Moaning out, you gripped the sheets and smiled despite Mark being unable to see it. Finally, he was fucking you. You didn’t dress like a cheap whore for nothing. With the feeling of Mark’s hips slapping yours, the noises of his grunts and your muffled moans, and the thoughts swirling in your head, caused you to be close. And Mark knew this, because as he felt you twitching and clamping your walls down on his cock, he snuck his hand under your body and played with your clit. Rolling the bud between his fingers, you whimpered and curled your toes, starting to buck your hips back into his more frantically.

“Come on, cum for me already. I can’t hold it much longer, please.” Mark whined behind you, his dominant persona cracking slightly.

Not even a full minute later, you heard your ears start to ring as pleasure coursed through your veins, taking over all of your other senses.

Mark rode out yours and his highs before pulling out and collapsing next to you, once his grip on you vanished, your body hit the mattress as well. Him on his back and you on your stomach, you both looked at each other with dopey smiles and tired eyes.

“Thanks for the nut bro” Mark held out his closed fist to you. Rolling your eyes, you sit up and go to shove Mark, however, he caught your forearm before you could push him and pulled you into his chest. Planting his lips onto you, this kiss wasn’t like the ones before, this one was like Mark was pouring the words he was too scared to speak into you. Once you both pulled away, your eyebrows were furrowed, waiting to see what was going to be revealed. And once the silence was put to an end, you weren’t disappointed.

“I don’t want this to be a one time thing and I don’t see it as ‘just sex.’” Without responding to him, you pressed your lips to his and smiled.

[justjams2003]

Fast Pace-6

I do apologize to everyone who has been waiting so so long for this. I was shadowbanned and didn't want to upload anything while, because then you guys can't read it :(. But now, you guys can!

Summary: You're a hard-working Chef in Paris and after a freak accident run-in with Carlos Sainz, your life makes a 180. Let's just say with a certain agreement, you get your bills paid and in return stand in as Carlos' girlfriend for the press. But will you be able to handle the pressure and ensure the lines don't blur?

Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Carlos Sainz x Sugar Baby!Reader

Warnings: I've aged up Carlos, he is 33 in this fic. Smoking, smut, sexual themes, age difference, manipulation, control, slight obsession, the word 'daddy', tell me if I missed any

Dividers by: @firefly-graphics and @s-silk

Taglist: @httpjeonlicious, @f1lov3r, @messersandmesses, @hollie911, @oriconde08 @thehufflepuffavenger1 @fanboyluvr @thatgirlmj @whyamireadingthis @oriconde08 @depressedriches @roseseraj @skepvids @sain55wifey @distinguishedvoidlady @amatswimming @sachaa-ff @lightdragonrayne @lazybot @dark-night-sky-99 @formula1mount @fangirl-dot-com @saintslewis

Word count: 2,9k

Masterlist

Part 5~Part 7

A loud thunder crack causes a few people in the restaurant's head to snap up to the sky. Including my dear Y/N. Is she scared of thunder? Caco did not tell me this.  

Usually, my mind would immediately worry about the race. How will the rain affect the car? How will the rain affect the track? How the rain affect my driving? Not now, ever since saw her for the first-time racing has been at the far back of my mind. If Caco or any of the Ferrari team knew this, they’d want to get rid of her as soon as possible. But if she has to leave so do I.  

Her big brown eyes look up to me with concern and it just makes me want to wrap her up in my arms and never let go. Now, I worry about her getting wet. She might get sick or slip and fall. I did not bring an umbrella. I bring up my phone and go to dial the driver, but I’m interrupted before I can make the call.  

“What are you doing?” Those delicate brows of hers pull together while she asks me. “I’m calling a driver.” We haven’t finished eating, barely halfway through the meal but I’d kick myself if she develops a cold so soon in my care. There is a twinkle in her eyes and a smile pulls at her cheeks. “Why would you do that?” I can’t help but want to know what she is thinking.  

“I don’t want you to get sick, querida.” I lean forward, wanting to take her hand and caress it, but I’m not sure if she’ll allow me yet. A small laugh, a gentle one, she’s clearly amused with me, escapes her lips. “I’m sure a little rain won’t hurt. I’m not made of sugar.” She shrugs and can’t imagine that someone has such little care for their well-being. Especially someone as valuable as her.  

Consistently, my brow raises. “Care to explain the medical bills I paid then?” Her cheeks light up and her eyes drag down to her shoes again. Now that her hair is down, she insists on hiding behind it. But when her eyes meet me again, she seems to beg for me to forget about it. How could I ever forget anything about her? “In any case, for me you are made candy floss.”  

“You know, that reminds me of a poem. The author of it unknown, some people accredit it to Shakespear but clearly, they did not pay attention in English class if they think that. The true poet is unknown, but some consider it to be Qyazzirah Syeikh Ariffin. He says that you love the rain, but you open your umbrella. You love the sun but hide in the shade. It goes on but later he says that he fears what it means to be loved.”  

Her words are so captivating, and her mind is something that I’d get lost in. The words she speaks, to me it’s like listening to a professor. One who has studied years to know exactly what they are saying. If she was my teacher, I’d get 100%, because I’d cling to her every word. If I could have her talking forever, I’d make sure I will live forever so that I may hear every word.  

“How do you know this?” I ask, needing her to say more. She gives the cutest shrug. “It was between cooking or teaching English. I thought I’d make more money cooking and my parents wanted me to choose something more stable.” My blood boils thinking her parents wouldn’t support her true dream. How could they not see the beauty I see?  

“But do you like it? The cheffing I mean.” She seems to think for a moment, biting her lip. If she does it, one more time I wonder if I’ll have control. But I must, I can’t scare her off. I can’t bear to lose her. And I won’t. Not of my own doing and not by anybody else’s. I’ll give her the world and make sure no one can give her anything else or take anything from her.  

“Um... I did, at the beginning. When I could move to the centre of France, Paris. When I got to be independent, but it soon turned out to be more than I bargained for. I quickly got sick, because I wasn’t eating well. My mind wanders and it would take my mother calling for me to realise I hadn’t eaten. And then I fell behind on the bills. The stress made me smoke more which made me sicker.” Ah I see.  

The big world just got too much for my baby. She’s too small to know how to care for herself. I see now why she needs me so. Her mind wanders to a fantasy world. She wants to be someone big and important. And paramount people don’t have to worry about those small things like what to eat and drinking enough water.  

“Are you feeling any withdrawals yet? I know it was a bit thing to ask but you must know that I just want you to be as healthy as possible. So that you can enjoy all the things in life I want to give you.” She gives a coy smile and shakes her head. “No, it’s the least I can do for all you’ve done so far. I thought I’d be stuck with that debt for the rest of my life.”  

She rolls her eyes just thinking about it. I could see the moment the money was transferred that her shoulders got lighter, and her smile got brighter. I won’t let another thing in the world affect her like this. Nothing will ever again sit on her shoulders. “If you feel even slightly off tell me immediately.” She nods, hiding her face again.  

It irritates me, I want to see her as much as I can. I reach up and tuck her hair behind her ear. I’ll have to get her some hair accessories, just to make sure she doesn’t hide from me anymore.  

Because I can get her anything. She has me to provide for her and make sure that she stays in the most pristine condition. Now she can go of in her fantasy world and I’ll stay on earth to make her bubble doesn’t burst. “So, you don’t want to work as a cook anymore?” I need to ask, and I need to know exactly what her dreams consist of so that I may make it a reality.  

Again, she bites her lip, and I can feel my trousers grow tight. How on earth has she been roaming this earth? How are people not fighting tooth and nail to be in my position? “I think I’d much prefer something...slower. Less stressful, you know? I’d like to cook, yes, but rather at home or maybe even have my own show!”  

The excitement twinkles in her eyes again and I must know more. “When I was younger, my mother would teach me how to cook and I’d always imagine that I'm on a program. We’d watch master chef and I’d always imagine being Christina Tosi or Amandine Chaignot. But even then more than anything I wanted to be involved in fashion. In any shape or form. Even if I had to cook to the models.”  

She laughs, ever so slightly and I can see the memories flash behind her eyes. Then it will be so. Then suddenly we can both hear a slight pitter patter fall on the roof top. Her eyes instantly snap right over my shoulder. Watching as the pavement turn from concrete grey to cloudy grey.  

“As I was saying before. If it rains I am not afraid to get wet. If it snows I will not be afraid of the cold. And if I ever fall in love I hope I treat it the same.” I can’t help but lean in closer. I can’t help myself. In every sense I need to be as close as possible to her. Even if, for now, I don’t know if she wants me to be as near as I want to be.  

But when she looks up at me with those big doe eyes, my actions become uncontrolable. Her gaze makes me feel like a prescious jewel being discovered for the first time. Even if it is her who is Painite, rarer than Diamonds, rarer than Emeralds. Her hands are just too resistable, her skin too soft. I take her hand in mine, but refuse to look anywhere but her hypnotic eyes.  

I bring her knuckles to my lips and place a slow, gentle kiss. “You promise?” Her fair cheeks turn a rosy pink colour. She bites her lips and it takes everything in me not to kiss her. “I can’t make any promoses, Carlos. Emotions aren’t to be controlled or guarenteed. They are free and wild and only earned.”  

“Then I will earn your heart.”  

My heart breaks that I had to leave her, but my personal trainer had been blowing up my phone. I know he’s right. I know I have to keep my body up to standard for the racing. Even then, my mind is still with her. I had let her play in the rain after our late lunch. I could see in her eyes that she so badly wanted to play.  

I told her that I’ll buy her everything all over again just to see her happy. Just to see her enjoy herself I’d let her rip the entire hotel appart. This did make her smile and it melted my heart. I didn’t care for the people staring, or the people taking pictures. All I see is the twinkle in her eyes and those cheeks become round with a wide smile.  

When I left her, her nose and cheeks were rosy pink and she was cold to the touch. I told her to take a shower and bundle up. I was honestly struggling to keep my head straight while gyming. The thought of the water fallings over those soft curves of hers makes me hot and heavy. It makes me adrenaline go crazy and my mind fuzzy. My trainer said I hit a new PR on the weights.  

I had been gone for at least an hour or two, but the sun had long since set. The girls I’d been with before, yes they were kind, yes they were sweet, but they just weren’t her. It was the moment I set my eyes on her in that restuarant, I knew I had to have her. They feared the public eye, they wanted nothing to do with the most important parts of my life. She craves it, she’s there whenever I need her.  

I found her curled up on the couch. She’d taken the extra cushions and comforters and build herself a bed there. The blankets are all the way up to her nose. She’s curled into a little ball. Taking up as little space as possible. My heart flutters and my cock goes hard. I need a shower.  

Why would she do that? Hadn’t I told her to sleep on the bed? Why does she insist on defying me when all I do is for her betterment? Terco como siempre. I prepare the bed, making sure there isn’t a single then wrong. I pick her up bridal style, up close I can hear the very light snores. She doesn’t wake, however, she cuddles up closer to me. And when I tuck her in nice and close and can’t help but notice how innocent she looks with her new pj’s.  

She clings to my shirt when I lay her down, in her subconscious she needs me as much as I need her. More than the money, more than the fame, more than the job. She wants me, she needs me. I am nothing without her and I must make sure that I will never loose her.  

After the shower, she’d thrown the duvet off to the side. She’d spread out across the bed and her shirt had ridden up right under her breast. And suddenly I need a cold shower again. Her skin is soft, like a freshly hatched dove. Her skin the same colour too and I can’t but want her to get more sun.  

My hands move without control again. Her delicate curves are like a magnet to my body. I make sure to be as soft and slow as I can, to not make a noise. Just slightly hovering above her small body. My lips make contact with the arch of her collarbone, just small gentle kisses. I do not make a sound, but she sure does. Smalls whimpers and whines escape her lips.  

Mi pequeña wants this. Still deep in sleep, but her hands grab for me. Yearn for me, like I do to her. Just soft, almost ticklish kisses on her collar. Worshipping her like I so badly want to. But, for now, I won’t take it any further. Call it but a goodnight kiss. I slept on the couch, otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to control myself.  

“Dulce niña, what happened here? Did you hurt yourself while I was gone?” Carlos’ hands come up to your neck. You instantly notice how his hands are big enough to wrap around your entire neck, you’re sure. Your brows intertwine, you know what he’s talking about. You tried curling your hair, to look good if there are cameras, but clearly you need more practice.  

His brows furrow and concern fill his eyes. The look in his eyes is the same as last night, in your dreams. You can remember his big stromg arms taking holding you. Of those storming eyes commanding you to scream his name. If he found out about these filthy dreams you had, you’d sink into the ground of embarresment. He’s a classy guy who hasn’t asked for anything more than a smile, now you’re the one thinking of his skin on yours.  

 Not only that but you woke up in the bed this morning, even after going to bed on the couch. You and your girls had been talking for longer than you’d realised, likely falling asleep while on the phone call. They’d been just as excited as you were about the whole day. Both of them swooning and wishing their partners would do and say what he does.  

You heard him coming back while you were getting ready. “No, no, don’t start with that mister.” You say, jabbing him in his chest. He’s sweaty and had clearly just come back from the gym. It’s already 07:30. His eyebrows furrow together. “I told you that I’d sleep on the couch. You are a very important person and need your full rest.”  

A smirk forms on his face and it only makes you more annoyed. He crosses his arms and leans back, clearly done listening. “You already take care of me, give me a chance to take care of you. Relationships are 50/50. Even the more...unconventoinal ones.” You can’t help but hold onto his shirt, really wanting to drive the point home. “I agree, you tell me what you want and I give it to you. 50/50.”  

You fold your arms together and roll your eyes. “Vous êtes impossible.” Something compared to a growl escapes his throat. He pulls you close to him by the hips. “I like it when you talk French to me.” Then his hand grazes your collar again. “Now tell me, what happened.” Concern is etched into his eyes and his touch is as gently as can be.  

You shrug, “I wanted to curl my hair, but I haven’t used the curling iron in a few years...” He looks confronted with your words. “If you know you can’t use it, why risk hurting yourself.” He tucks a strand of now wavy hair behind your ear. You shrug and look up at him, “I wanted to impress you.” He lets out a loud laugh and takes your face in his hands.  

“You’re too cute. What’d I do to have someone like you share a hotel room with me?” His eyes look and it makes you feel so warm inside. “You paid me,” your answer is blunt but the truth. You’re still not entirely sure where you stand in this strange relationship. He laughs just like before, “That reminds me, I got you something.”  

He then opens his gym bag and then pulls out a handfull of things. He hands them to you and you can see it’s a bunch of hair accesories. A gold headband, a gold claw clip and some scrunchies of various colours. You furrow your brows at him and he ecplains himself by taking the headband and carefully guiding it across your hair. “I don’t like how you hide from me. This should make sure that you can’t anymore.” Your cheeks go pink, he noticed.  

“Can I ask you a really strange question?” You’re not sure why now you decided to ask the question that’s been forming in your bind. It just slipped out and when he looks at you like that you don’t have much control anymore. “Always.” He smiles, still fixing your hair.  “Do I have to call you daddy?”  

His hand stops and his eyes meet yours. He forms a slight grin and then pulls your closer by the shoulders. He bends down low and then whispers in your ear. “Only when you want something.”  

My taglist is open, just ask!

[deoidesign]

Hello I stumbled across your profile and I just say I love your art style! I've gotta ask, how'd your develop it? And do you have any advice for someone who can't decide what they want their art to look like?

Thank you so much!

To be entirely honest, I don't feel like I truly "developed" my style. I feel a lot more like I finally let myself draw it! But I am incredibly deliberate with my work, and I do have clear tendencies and preferences... So I'll do my best to explain how I got to where I am now as an artist.

It's important to remember that "style" is something of a nebulous concept. It changes with you as you grow as a person, and most artists can work in and emulate many art styles! Art really is a form of communication with yourself, and your "style" is a reflection of the tendencies and preferences you have. My art does not look how it looked 5 years ago, and my art will look different 5 years from now too. I've changed, and my art reflects that!

(2012, 2018, 2023; two pieces I remember being incredibly proud of and considered my best work up til that point, and then my most recent piece)

What you need to do, as everyone will tell you, is study the fundamentals (anatomy, perspective, form and structure, lighting and shadow, color, and composition) so you have the proper tools to make the most informed decisions possible about your art, and so you can deliberately break or follow rules as you please for your desired effect. I know it sounds silly to learn rules if you're not gonna be following them anyways, but they help you be much more consistent and intentional! More knowledge is NEVER a bad thing to have!

However, I know it's a bit demoralizing to just be told to study fundamentals. Everyone knows you're supposed to do that, but it takes YEARS to learn, and people want their art to feel how they want it to now (which is very very very normal to want!)

So on that front, I have 2 follow up suggestions that I personally find helpful (of course, everyone is different, so it's not like this is the only way to learn! But, if it resonates with you, it might mean it will work for you too.)

1: Separate study from application

I believe this is beneficial for a few reasons:

If the goal of every piece is learning, it can become frustrating, overwhelming, and boring

It's harder to self critique when there are multiple variables to investigate. I like to study one fundamental at a time

Study (usually) works best with a large quantity of output, whereas application of knowledge (finished pieces) is often more satisfying and effective when you get to take your time

Deliberate practical application of what you've learned in a finished piece helps cement the learning in your mind, and also lets you get satisfying finished pieces with noticeable improvement after a good study session!

I've found that keeping these things separate helps me improve faster and more deliberately, and it takes a lot of the pressure off of both aspects! I'm not worried about my studies looking beautiful, they're just to learn! And I don't feel pressured to critique my finished pieces, cause they're just for fun and to make something pretty. I personally find this helps me have a much healthier relationship with my art.

When studying, copy! Copy things as best as you can, all the time. It gives you something to compare to for self critique (and of course, if you're copying someone else's work and you share the study, ALWAYS give credit, share the original, and say it was for study.) In application, don't copy: reference. Make it yours!

2: Let yourself do the things that feel "easy" or like "cheating"

This one is simpler: nothing in art is easy.

If something feels easy to you, most of the time it's not because it's actually any easier... It's because it's part of your natural tendencies and preferences! This took me forever to realize, but as long as you're actually doing some study, then you're learning. You don't need to learn All The Time. When you're doing the "application" portion, you should let yourself do whatever is actually the most fun and feels easiest! This is where your style will start to come through, and where you get to learn about yourself. Take the pressure off, and have fun!!!

The only cheating in art is theft. If you're not stealing, then it's allowed!

My whole life (and yes, still!) I'd get regular criticism about both my style and my subject matter. You will too. You'll see a thousand different styles, and a hundred different things to admire in each. Your heart will ache that you don't draw like others do.

But art is a form of communication with yourself. It's like your voice, or your accent; just something that's a part of you! It can be fun to mimic others', but when you sit to have a conversation you speak naturally. (I know some people want to and do change their voice, but this is a metaphor and metaphors aren't perfect)

Don't stress so much about what you want your art to look like, especially if you're not sure. There's a lot of value to be had in constant experimentation, I think it'd be rather boring to only draw one style the rest of my life. What I draw is what I want to see, right now, for who I am now! It's a part of me and comes naturally, if I let it!

I hope this helps!

[that-one-weird-fangirl2020]

Sebastian Sallow Prompt List inspired by Taylor Swift Songs and Lyrics (reblogs encouraged)

1. Style (1989)

"... You got that James Dean daydream look in your eyes, and I got that red lip classic thing that you like..."

2. Betty (folklore)

"But if I just showed up at your party, would you have me? Would you want me? Would you tell me to go fuck myself? Or lead me to the garden? In the garden, would you trust me if I told you it was just a summer thing? I'm only 17, I don't know anything, but I know I miss you..."

3. Getaway Car (reputation)

"We were jet-set, Bonnie and Clyde. Until I switched to the other side, to the other side. It's no surprise I turned you in, 'cause us traitors never win... I'm in a getaway car, I left you in a motel bar. Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys, that was the last time you ever saw me"

4. Sweet Nothing (Midnights)

"...They said the end is coming. Everyone's up to something. I find myself running home to your sweet nothings. Outside, they're push and shoving. You're in the kitchen humming. All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing..."

5. Fearless (Fearless)

"Well you stood there with me in the doorway- My hands shake- I'm not usually this way. But you pull me in, and I'm a little more brave. It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something, it's fearless..."

6. Gold Rush (evermore)

"But I don't like a gold rush, gold rush. I don't like anticipating my face in a red flush. I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch. Everybody wants you. Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you. Walk past, quick brush, I don't like slow motion double vision in rose blush. I don't like that falling feels like flying 'til the bone crush. Everybody wants you, but I don't like a gold rush."

7. All Too Well (RED)

"...I walked through the door with you, the air was cold. But something about it felt like home somehow. And I, left my scarf there at your sister's house. And you've still got it in your drawer even now..."

8. Sparks Fly (Speak Now)

"I run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild. Just keep on keeping your eyes on me, it's just wrong enough to make it feel right. And lead me up the staircase, won't you whisper soft and slow, 'I'm captivated by you, baby, like a fireworks show...'"

9. Dress (reputation)

"Say my name and everything just stops.. I don't want you like a best friend. Only bought this dress so you could take it off, take it off. Carve your name into my bedpost, 'cause I don't want you like a best friend. Only bought this dress so you could take it off, take it off..."

10. Enchanted (Speak Now)

"This night is sparkling, don't you let it go. I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home. I'll spend forever wondering if you knew, I was enchanted to meet you."

11. You Belong With Me (Fearless)

"...If you could see that I'm the one who understands you. Been here all along, so, why can't you see? You belong with me..."

12. Teardrops on My Guitar (Taylor Swift [Debut])

"He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar. The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star. He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do..."

13. Daylight (Lover)

"And I can still see it all (In my mind). All of you, all of me (Intertwined). I once believed love would be (Black and white). But it's golden (Golden). And I can still see it all (In my head). Back and forth from New York (Sneaking in your bed). I once believed love would be (Burning red). But it's golden. Like daylight..."

[downbad4fyodor]

Shattered Vows

Pairing: Ougai Mori x Fem!Reader Genre: Light Angst (I think) Summary: Toxic relationships take forever to heal Warnings: None Recommended song: Vampire by Olivia Rodrigo Other Notes: This is at least, what, day 4 of writing a song-inspired fic? That's literally all of my stories (because I have absolutely no inspiration), so. . . Anyways, I don't know anyone who likes Mori, so here's some angst because I personally love Mori, but decided to do y'all a favor by making him even more of a terrible person.

As you walk through the dimly lit streets of Yokohama, the memories of your past with Mori weigh heavily on your heart. You once thought you had found love and purpose within the shadows of the underworld, but now, all that remains are the scars of deception and manipulation.

It started with a chance encounter on a rainy night. You were a young and impressionable individual, seeking solace from a turbulent life. Mori, with his captivating presence and silver tongue, offered you a shelter from the storm both outside and within. He became your sanctuary, or so you thought.

Under the guise of protection and affection, Mori wrapped you in a web of lies. You were blind to his true intentions, blinded by the illusion of love he spun around you. Your loyalty to him was unwavering, and you became entangled in the dangerous machinations of the Port Mafia. He used you, manipulated you, and exploited your emotions for his own gain.

But as time passed and the truth revealed itself, you began to see the cracks in the facade. The love you believed was genuine was nothing more than a mask for Mori's selfish desires. The pain of betrayal cut deep, leaving behind a void that even the darkest corners of the Port Mafia could not fill.

Tonight, as you find yourself near the Port Mafia's headquarters, you can't help but question your past choices. Why did you let yourself be blinded by Mori's charm? How could you have been so naive? The anger and disappointment you feel towards yourself weigh heavily on your heart.

As you stand there, lost in your thoughts, a familiar figure emerges from the shadows. It's Mori himself, his cold and calculating eyes meeting yours. There's a flicker of surprise in his expression, as if he hadn't expected to see you here.

"Y/N," he says softly, his voice holding a hint of something you can't quite place. "What are you doing here?"

You take a deep breath, trying to steady your trembling emotions. "I came here to face my past, Mori. To confront the mistakes I made, and the pain I allowed you to cause."

Mori's gaze softens slightly, and for a moment, you catch a glimpse of vulnerability in his usually stoic demeanor. "I never meant to hurt you," he admits, his voice tinged with remorse.

"I know," you reply, your voice steady but laced with sadness. "But you did, Mori. You took advantage of me, lied to me, and used me to further your own agenda. I was just a pawn in your game."

He sighs, looking down at the ground for a moment before meeting your gaze again. "You're right. I don't deserve your forgiveness."

You shake your head, feeling the weight of your anger and resentment lifting slightly. "No, you don't. But I need to forgive myself for allowing it to happen. For believing in a love that was never real."

Mori takes a step closer to you, his eyes searching yours. "Y/N, I can't change my past actions, but I can promise you that I never wanted to hurt you. The choices I made were for the sake of the organization, but I see now how selfish and ruthless I've been."

His words tug at your heart, and despite everything, you can't deny that a part of you still cares for him. But you know that you can't fall back into his web of deception.

"I appreciate your words, Mori, but I need to move on from this life," you say firmly. "I need to find my own path and reclaim the strength and independence I lost while I was with you."

Mori nods slowly, his expression a mix of resignation and understanding. "I won't stand in your way. If that's what you truly want, then I won't hold you back."

With those words, you take a step back, distancing yourself from the man who once held your heart captive. The road to healing won't be easy, but you know it's the right one.

As you walk away from Mori and the Port Mafia, you can feel a sense of freedom washing over you. The burden of your past regrets slowly begins to lift, and you look ahead to a future where you can finally be your own person.

Though your heart may bear scars from the past, you know that with time, they will heal. And you will emerge from the darkness stronger, wiser, and ready to embrace a brighter tomorrow.

Bloodsucker, famefucker. . . Bleeding me dry like a damn vampire. . .

[starstwinkleplanetsshine]

Daughter of the Sea

Chapter Nine: I Play Rock, Paper, Scissors with my Brother (Read on AO3 here)

That night at the campfire I sat next to Percy, who sat next to Annabeth. The two of us were our own Poseidon Cabin section, with a little trident banner and everything. We continued getting to know each other, playing 20 questions and swapping all the stories we could. We spent the whole evening smiling and laughing, and even Annabeth seemed to forgive Percy for all the fear and worry he caused. I hadn’t seen her smile in weeks, and now hers was the brightest one around the campfire. 

The mood of the entire camp was better than I had ever seen it, and the flames reached at least 10 feet into the air, burning a bright pink. It was as if Percy being back released a weight off everyone’s shoulders, and now they were free to relax and be themselves again. I had never heard people sing that loud, or dance so wildly, and the sing-along lasted way longer than it should have. 

Everyone carried that energy to their cabins, skipping and dancing all the way back. People called goodnights to each other as they went into their respective buildings, and my brother, Annabeth, and I were some of the last ones straggling at the back of the pack. At least everyone at camp had come up to Percy at some point to express their thanks that he wasn’t dead, ask about the quest, or vaguely threaten him (mostly the Ares Cabin), and it was so sweet to watch. The whole camp loved him, and it was easy to see why. 

I pushed open the door to Cabin Three, not even thinking about it. I was all the way to my bed before I turned around and saw Percy still standing in the doorway. 

“What’s wrong?” 

He took a moment to look around the cabin, taking it all in, before stepping through the threshold. 

“It just feels like forever since I’ve been here. There were a few times on the quest I thought I’d never see this place again.” He slowly walked to his bunk bed and began to take his shoes off. He cracked a smile as he looked to my side of the room. 

“Plus, it looks different in here.” 

I blushed sheepishly. “I’m sorry if it's too girly now.” 

He just shook his head. 

“Not at all, I think your side is cool. I like your trinkets.” 

“Thanks.” 

It was quiet for a bit, and a little awkward as we both tried to figure out what the new dynamic was. I felt like an intruder in my own home, and I could tell Percy didn’t want to step on my toes, even though this had been his room, and his alone, for the past three summers. 

Eventually we were both changed into our pajamas and sitting on our beds, neither one of us moving to turn off the lights. 

“So how do you like it in Cabin Three?” I could tell he was trying to be nice, and his voice was sincere. 

“It was lonely at first.” I didn’t see any reason to not be honest with him, which was strange. I was usually very guarded, and I didn’t let anyone in. But with Percy, it felt different. “But eventually I settled in. Some nights it was nice to be alone after a long day, but other times I wished I had someone else with me, like all the other kids do.” 

He nodded and played with the edge of his comforter. 

“I get that. I remember my first summer in here all by myself. I hated being alone.” 

“Really?” 

“Oh yeah, I remember being so jealous of all the other campers who had siblings. Don't get me wrong, being a child of Poseidon is cool and all, but it can be super lonely.” 

“I’ve noticed that.” 

Percy smiled at me, and his eyes were kind. “Good thing we don’t have to worry about that anymore, huh?” 

I smiled back at him. “Just don’t die on that quest.” I meant it as a joke, but I saw the way his shoulders slumped as he looked down. 

“Yeah…that.” 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

“No, it's okay. I know you were kidding, but it's a fair thing to say. I could die down there.” 

I looked at him with concern, but I couldn’t think of anything to say. 

“I accepted that a long time ago,” He continued, “although I would rather stay alive.” 

“I think we’d all prefer if you stayed alive,” I raised my eyebrows, preparing to push my luck, “especially Annabeth.” 

Percy turned beet red in seconds, and I knew my words had done exactly what I wanted them to. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

I rolled my eyes dramatically. “I may be new, but I’m not blind.” 

I could tell he was trying hard not to smile, but he was failing. 

“She’s just…a really good friend. That's all.” 

“Oh, yeah, sure, that must be it.” He tried to stay serious, but we both burst out laughing in seconds. 

“Okay fine, maybe you're right. But just don’t tell anyone, okay?” 

“I won’t.” I said with a smile. In my head I added, but I don’t think I would need to tell anyone, anyway. 

“We’d better get to bed,” He said with a sigh. “I leave tomorrow at dawn.” 

“Oh yeah, your quest.” 

“Annabeth’s quest.” 

“Right.”

We were silent for a moment, before Percy spoke again. “How ‘bout this: when I get back, I’ll show you my favorite place to swim at camp.” 

It wasn't much, but it was time I would get to spend with him. And I did love swimming. 

“Deal.” 

He smiled and laid back on his bed. 

“Goodnight, Angie.” 

“Goodnight, Percy.” I answered as I laid down. 

I closed my eyes and listened to the faint sound of waves you could always hear from Cabin Three. 

“Ummm, Ange?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Can you get the lights?” 

“But I’m already under my covers.” 

“Yeah, so am I.” 

I groaned in frustration. 

“You’re closer!” 

“Barely!” His voice was getting whiny. “Plus…” 

“Plus what?” 

“You’re newer.” 

“I knew you were going to say that!” 

“It's true!” 

I propped myself up on my elbows and looked over to him, only to see that he was already staring at me. 

“There’s only one way to settle this.” I said, and his eyes were deadly serious. 

“Rock, paper, scissors?” 

“Rock, paper, scissors.” 

His eyes twinkled as he smiled. “You're on.” 

We were in position in seconds, ready to battle from across the room. 

“Rock…paper…scissors…shoot!” At the same time, I put scissors, my go-to first move, and Percy made a strange hand sign. 

“What is that?” I asked. 

“It's a gun.” 

“A gun?!” 

“A gun. Beats everything.” 

“But that’s not fair! That's not a thing!” I couldn't believe what was happening. 

“It's a thing now.” His voice was smug, and I was having none of it. 

“But…but…” I was trying to think of how a gun would interact with all three objects, and was very upset to come to the conclusion that it would beat them all. 

“Don't worry,” he gloated as he snuggled into his sheets. “You’re not the only person to fall for it. Now…lights please!” 

Grumbling and complaining, I got out of my comfy bed, stalked across the floor, and turned off the lights. I made my way back to my bed carefully, not wanting to trip over anything. I somehow got the feeling that that would make Percy feel even more triumphant. Once I was back in bed, I heard him call out, 

“Thank you!” 

“Oh, don't mention it.” 

He laughed, and it was quiet for a while. I thought he had fallen asleep, and I was just about to close my eyes when he spoke again, his voice low and sincere. 

“Angie?” 

“Yeah, Percy?” 

“I’m glad that I have a sister. You’re pretty cool.” 

I was thankful for the darkness, because my eyes instantly filled with tears. 

“You’re pretty cool, too. Thanks for coming back.”

There was a heavy silence before he spoke again, his voice softer. 

“Goodnight, Ange.” 

“Goodnight.” 

Within the next minute he was snoring lightly, and I fell asleep with a smile on my face. 

He and Annabeth left early the next morning, and I dragged myself out of my cozy bed to say goodbye. Argus, the many-eyed head of security, was taking them into Manhattan to try the crazy plan Percy had come up with. No one told me what it was, but I could guess from the pieces I overheard, and it did sound insane. They would be going back into the Labyrinth, and it was probable that the worst was yet to come, so it was sad to say goodbye. 

Now that I had met him, I didn’t want to let him go. There was so much more I wanted to know, so many questions I didn’t get to ask. Stop worrying so much, I told myself. They’ll be fine. I’ll see him soon. 

Percy gave me a big hug, and Annabeth gave me a wry smile to say goodbye. I stood on the top of Half Blood Hill next to a sleeping dragon, smoke curling out of its nose as it snored, and watched until their car disappeared. Then I made my way back to Cabin Three and went back to sleep. 

The sound of the breakfast conch woke me up for the second time, and I dragged myself out of bed yet again to start my day. There was a strange energy in the Camp, as if new life had been pumped into everyone. It wasn't as joyful as it was the night before, but it wasn’t the sullen atmosphere that had been hanging around the last two weeks. It was as if everyone was on edge, waiting for something big to happen. And it felt like when it did come, everyone would be ready. There was a new hope in everyone, and some people even believed that the quest would be successful and stop the attack before it came. 

The day passed normally, and I was actually starting to make some progress with my throwing knives skills. I made it to the top of the rock wall without touching the lava once, and I almost beat Travis Stoll sparring with a sword. So close. 

Our sword instructor, Quintus, had disappeared a couple days ago, so Chiron had put the Stoll brothers in charge of training me in this area. It seemed like a strange choice at first, but I soon saw that the two were Jack-of-all-trades and there was hardly anything they weren’t good at. They pushed me, telling me that I would have to work harder if I ever wanted to beat Percy. Sometimes that motivated me, sometimes that made me want to slash them across the face. Either way, it worked. 

I didn't feel as lonely that day, even though I sat at meals by myself and went back to an empty cabin. I had finally met my brother, and I finally knew for certain that I wasn’t by myself. 

The next day was much of the same: training, solitary meals, and working on my abilities with Chiron. The centaur seemed distracted, and I could guess why. Percy and Annabeth went back into the Labyrinth a day ago, and there had been no word. The whole Camp was operating under the assumption that no news was good news, but people were still nervous. 

It wasn’t until the next day, June 30th, that things got crazy. 

It was mid-morning, and I was walking along the pebbled shore of the lake, trying to make waves. I was great at this task when I was angry, but Chiron and I had been working on not letting my emotions control my abilities, and to be able to use them at will. So far, I hadn't been very successful. I was focusing so hard on the water I almost missed it completely—five pegasi swooping down over the water, making for the center of camp. I took off running instantly, and I wasn't the only one. 

I reached the grassy area in the middle of the Cabins not long after the flying horses touched down, carrying Percy, Annabeth, and three other people I didn’t recognize. Well, maybe people wasn't the right word. One of them was a scrawny, emo looking kid, probably two years younger than me, but the other two were not human at all. One of them was a satyr with a hat on, and the other was a large cyclops. Judging by everyone's reaction, though, I guessed he was okay to be in Camp. 

Percy was already updating Chiron on what they had learned since returning to the Labyrinth. He revealed that our sword instructor, Quintus, was actually Daedalus, and had already sided with the Titans. He also told him that Kronos was rising, and that sent shockwaves through all the campers who were there. Chiron didn’t seem phased by anything, though. 

“I feared as much.” Chiron said. “We must hurry. Hopefully you have slowed the Titan lord, but his vanguard will still be coming through. They will be anxious for blood. Most of our defenders are already in place. Come!” 

I didn’t stick around to hear whatever happened next, instead running to the edge of Camp where most of the Campers were gathering to get ready for whatever army was coming up through Zeus’ fist. Percy hadn’t seen me when he landed, and I thought that was a good thing, for now. 

It was the biggest military operation I had ever seen. Everyone was in the clearing, dressed in full battle armor. The Hephaestus cabin had set up traps around the entrance to the Labyrinth—razor wire, pits filled with Greek fire, rows of sharpened sticks to deflect a charge, two giant catapults. The Ares cabin was on the front line, drilling in phalanx formation with Clarisse calling orders. Apollo’s and Hermes’ cabins were scattered in the woods with bows ready, many up in the trees, and I spotted Cadence and Will set up at a makeshift medical tent, both of them with weapons at the ready. Even the dryads and satyrs were armed and ready to defend their home. 

I saw Annabeth come up the hill and join her siblings who had set up a command tent and were directing operations, a gray banner with an owl on it waving in the front. Even the Aphrodite kids and Dionysus twins were making themselves useful. The only person who didn’t have a job was me, and I stood and just stared at the controlled chaos around me. Percy and Chiron came up the hill next, both of their faces grave. They walked straight to me, Percy giving me a quick hug before looking at the centaur. 

“It’s not enough.” Chiron muttered. Percy looked like he was thinking about a hundred different things, and he gazed around with intense, calculating eyes, surveying everything. Chiron looked down at me. 

“I want you to go to the medical tent and stay there. Help with any wounded that you can.” My eyebrows furrowed, and I looked up in shock. 

“But…I don’t know how to do that.” 

“It will be the safest.” 

“But I want to fight!” The centaur sighed and Percy looked away. 

“I know, but you’re not ready. You’ve only been here a few weeks—” 

“And I've learned so much! I can do this, please let me help.” I looked to my brother for support, but he wouldn’t meet my eyes. It was clear he wasn’t going to contradict Chiron, no matter what he thought. 

Chiron shook his head. “My word is final. I will not risk you for this, not yet. You have a greater destiny ahead.” With that, he turned to Percy, who was pretending to be very interested in a small yellow flower at his feet. “Stay with me, Percy. When the fighting begins, I want you to wait until we know what we’re dealing with. You must go where we most need reinforcements.” 

I didn’t stick around to hear my brother's answer, storming away with a huff. For a split second, I swore the ground shook where I walked, but it was over as soon as it began. I was so angry I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking, and I nearly ran straight into Cadence. 

“Whoa! Watch where you’re—Angie? What's wrong?” 

“Chiron won’t let me fight.” I gripped the hilt of the sword at my belt. 

“He’s just trying to protect you.” Her voice was low and kind. 

“But I want to help!” 

“This will be a battle, Angie. A full-on battle. It’s not like sparring with the Stoll brothers, you could get seriously hurt.” 

“Or you could die.” Will added from where he was bustling about in the tent. 

“Or you could die.” Cadence agreed. A lump formed in my throat. I hadn’t really considered just how dangerous of a situation I was in. An army of monsters was about to come out of the ground, and I had only seen one or two monsters in my life. Part of me knew Chiron was right, that I wasn’t ready for this fight yet. But another part of me, a bigger part, wanted to be in the middle of it, needed to be side by side with my brother. 

“I don't care!” I shouted indignantly. 

“Well, everyone else does.” And with that, she grabbed my arm and dragged me back to the tent. 

I had just crossed the threshold when the ground underneath me started trembling, and I was certain it wasn’t because of me. Everyone in the clearing stopped what they were doing. The head of the Ares cabin, Clarisse, barked a single order:  

“Lock shields!” 

Then the Titan lord’s army exploded from the Labyrinth, and all hell broke loose.

Literally. 

[wings-of-an-antelope]

The Sweet and The Spicy

Dr. Cox X Female Nurse.

Dr. Perry Cox liked to start his morning out, one of two ways, either he'd head to the cafeteria, get his morning cup of coffee and spend his morning going over the charts from the night before, or he liked to lean on the counter of the nurses station and wait 'casually' for Nurse Clover to appear like she did every morning.

She always had a smile on her face, not a too wide smile, nor a smile that seemed too bright, a small smile that let everyone around her experience just a little light in their day. She brought her own scrubs every day, a cute little green number with little four leaf clovers decorating the collar and pocket hem, her hair, red like fire, pulled up on the top of her head in a large well maintained bun, not a single hair out of place, even as her work day stretched on forever.

Perry had worked with Nurse Clover for years and watched her from afar for just as long, he dared not insert himself into her life, he wasn't right for her, he was mean, cruel, stubborn, he was rough and violent at times, she needed someone who wasn't him. He'd come to terms with it, settling for the sparse moments he was able to manage in the hospital. Limited as they were, he enjoyed them.

This morning however Perry's morning was going neither of those ways, today JD had stopped him at the front desk, his frustration with the younger man interrupted immediately by a voice that turned his legs to jelly.

"Dr. Cox, getting a bit of a late start? You're usually by the station long before me." She smiles, not the usual smile she wears every day, this one takes the breath from his lungs so forcefully he has to stop himself from gasping for air.

"Just a little busier on the way up there today." He smiles, what he hopes is his most charming smile as she bids him good day with a little wave of her hand, disappearing through the doorway, his eyes can't leave the doorway until she's completely out of view.

My heart slams in my chest as I do my best to walk like a human being, its just a little stroll through the door but every interaction I have with Dr. Cox sends the muscle in my chest into palpitations, I'm praying every moment that I don't trip. As soon as I'm out of view I try my best to gather myself, by the time I actually make it to the nurses station I've managed to slow my heart rate but also tame the blush that had heated my cheeks the moment he'd opened his mouth.

"I know that face, YOU saw Dr. You-know-who!" Turk was sitting on the counter waiting to get his daily dose of my inevitable train wreck encounters with Dr. Cox. Or rather the train wreck after the encounters.

"He was down in the main lobby..." I sulked a little bit, earning a smile from Turk who shook his head in support of my plight.

"No time to prepare... that really sucks. So.... how did it go?" He pushed, wiggling his brows and waiting for me to dish the details.

"Actually, it went pretty well, I commented on his not being on the floor already, he answered back that he was busier than usual.... it was after I walked away I turned into a mess." I couldn't help the little dramatic dip that my whole body seemed to want to participate in.

"Was it bad?" He asked his eyebrows shooting up over his forehead, the expression on his face was one that I didn't quite understand.

What I couldn't see was the death threats being thrown over my shoulder by the subject of the conversation if Turk ratted him out.

"You know how it gets Chris.... My legs get all wobbly, I was so sure I looked like an idiot walking out of there.... It was all I could do not to make a fool of myself in front of that Spicy Adonis." I sighed, letting my head fall back against my shoulder blades, in an attempt to ease the tension forming a little ball of pain there.

The moment my head settled, I was met with what I can only describe as the most beautiful and painful moment of my life. The shock of meeting the eyes that haunted my days caused me to jolt, my muscles spasm, ripping in places and causing me to let out this shriek of both pain and surprise before dropping in mind numbing, bone searing pain. Then there was nothing, just black.

Perry Cox had never in a million years expected Nurse Clover to hurt herself when she saw him, he didn't really understand it himself but she'd torn muscles in her shoulders and along her spine, he'd managed to catch her before she hit the floor. Barking orders to the gathered group of nurses and doctors, she was settled into a bed and being treated within minutes, her charts drawn up and her admission papers signed, by himself. Now he reclined in the uncomfortable orange leather in the corner of the room, waiting, for her to awaken.

"Dr. Cox? Could you clarify something for me?" Nurse Clover, who's chart stated that her name was actually Emily Clover, called softly from the hospital bed. She looked tired and small under that white blanket.

"Anything." He answered, honestly.

"You heard what I said?" Her voice seems even smaller now.

"Yep." He pops the P and her cheeks burn bright red, the monitor at her side clearly giving away her elevated heart rate.

"Just Perfect..." She whispers almost to herself, turning her head away from him as best she can in the small confined space.

Perry takes this moment to make his way to the other side of the bed, settling on the edge of it with his hip sitting sideways as not to take up so much of the small bed, not giving her the opportunity to turn her head away, his hand brushes some of the hair out of her face, with it cascading over her shoulders in loose waves, slightly tangled from the removal of her hair piece, he noticed maybe for the first time, truly how much hair she had.

"I think we should talk about this, Emily." He stated, looking deep into the ocean blue of her eyes, she looked so uncertain, the sound of her name leaving his lips deepened the color of her iris'.

"Can we just forget this happened? Go back to the way things were... before?" She questioned, cheeks bright red, heart monitor beeping away setting off alarms at the nurses station. Nurses occasionally walking up to the door, then turning away and retreating.

"After what I heard this morning, I don't think I could ever go back to the way things were." He placed his hand under her chin, using gentle pressure with his index finger to guide her gaze back to his when she dropped it dejectedly.

"Bo-hoy-hoy-hoy hearing you call me a Spicy Adonis did things to me. Emily, I could never go back because I've kept myself away, worried that I was wrong for you. " He lowers the hand under her chin, choosing instead to run it over his face to accent his point.

It seems to take her a moment to fully process what he was saying, he could see her expression turn from an uneasy tension to one of dawning realization and then he was graced with possibly the most amazing smile he had ever seen.

"Clarify something for me?" She asks, her eyes meeting his, a twinkle of joy glimmering in their depths, making his heart skip several beats, he feels eternally grateful that he's not the one hooked to the machines.

"Anything." He smiles.

"Does this mean....?" She left the question open ended, hoping most likely that he'll finish it for her.

"It means, in a couple of weeks when you're discharged, we're going to dinner, then back to my place." He grins as she turns bright pink, her little hand motioning for him to lean down so that she could whisper in his ear.

"Where I'm going to make you see stars and, roar my name." The tip of her tongue flicks over the lobe of his ear distracting him just enough that he didn't see the nip coming.

"God help anyone who gets in my way." He grinned, a wide Cheshire grin, his pager beeping on his side, checking it he leaned down, brushed hair from her face and placed a soft kiss to her forehead, rated E for everyone standing outside the window, staring in, departing swiftly as he stood.

"Best of luck, Dr. Cox." She smiled, an externally innocent smile, but underneath he could see the promise she'd made boiling.

A/n: Who has a date? This Guy! ^ ^ ^ ^

[weafurry]

For the art ask game, 20 and 22 :3

Ooooo for 20 I gotta go with either this drawing of hollow or this drawing of pale nightmare. The drawing of was WAAAAY out of my comfort zone in terms of how I usually stylize stuff and I really love how it turned out. The drawing of pale nightmare because it gave me fucking hell and I was so ready to just give up on it entirely but I stuck with it and FUCK did it pay off

For what inspires me, barring the obvious that is hollow knight. It's a really complicated answer. That idk even what it quite is myself, most of the time I just have an idea, go "that would be cool" and then make it. (Also music but that would take me a lifetime to talk about)

Soo I'm just gonna list things that have had a big impact on me.

Warrior cats! If it weren't for this I probably wouldn't even be drawing today.

Wings of Fire. The gateway that led to making an original story that I desperately want to turn into a webcomic or game one day.

The how to train your dragon trilogy. Need I say more then that and this fucking song

Madoka magica. I don't think I need to say much more. If you haven't seen it I won't spoil it, it's on Netflix.

Undertale. It would take me forever to explain this one but I blame it for so much/aff

LavenderTowne. I found her channel when I was like 12. Before she even had 100k subcribers I believe. I absolutely adore her art and I'm sure you can probably see the influence. (Especially if you look at how I draw humans) She's really what caused me to go on a massive upwards trajectory in terms of improvement.

The Beginners Guide. ALL I CAN SAY IS JUSY- FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKDJJSHSHAJAJABA OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW AAAAAAAAAAAJAJSHAHA /pos

Ni No Kuni: Wrath of The White Witch. It was the first game I've ever played and the first piece of media to ever impact me at such a scale. I won't go into it but my childhood sucked and I honestly don't know if I would of made it through it without this game. It's what led me to finding Stampylonghead and thus letting me find the massive part of my childhood that was Minecraft Youtubers. It holds such a special place in my heart that no words I can say will ever do it justice. I STRONGLY recommend you go play it. And even if you don't play it, at least listen to these songs from the soundtrack. Just godddd it hits so fucking hard. I could go on for hours about this game. It honestly give Hollow Knight a run for it's money.

I could go on for hours about different pieces of media that impact me but I'm gonna leave it here with a few honorble mentions with their soundtracks linked

Gravity ghost (gosh this one)

Child of Light

What Remains of Edith finch

[teddymochi]

Don’t look under if the tags are triggering

Just one drink, gonna keep it mellow

Responsible night for a polite fellow

Say hello to my friends and comrades

Don't tend to offend so I say perhaps

Just two drinks, as a social courtesy

We can raise a glass to our past fraternity

And certainly a perfectly normal informal get together

But it's been forever since we gathered so whatever

Just three drinks, for the sake of the old times

Proceed with tequila shots with a dish full of cold limes

The whole nine, laughing remembering all the old lines

Never used to work but I could give 'em another try

Just four drinks, y'know, take the edge off

I've had a hard week, I deserve to get sauced

Pick up another round as my friends depart and

They may not stick around but I just got started

Feel so much better than usual

I feel indisputable

Oh

I think that I might be beautiful

Just five drinks, fuckin' treat myself!

Pour the Dom Perignon from the back of the top shelf

Spend like God put on airs to sell it

Crowd pretends not to care but I know they're jealous

Just six drinks, let slip the dogs of war

Gonna start a fuckin' riot 'til I'm tossed out the front door

Zero to sixty I can turn on a dime, I'm hitting bottom

And I'm feeling like committing a crime

Just eight drinks, maybe I've lost count?

I can't remember the night, what I drank, or the amount

I'm fading in and out, my very consciousness is crumbling

Sorry, was I saying something?

Twelve drinks, strolling out of the hospital

Is it hair of the dog if you stay drunk and don't stop at all?

Another night losing it more than I can afford

Was I just feeling bored? Am I that insecure?

Feel so much better than usual

I feel indisputable

Oh

But now I'm feeling so beautiful

Don't wake me up from this spell I'm under if I'm still breathing

I know that I will be ugly when

I feel like myself again

Oh

But now I'm feeling so beautiful

Bottle of scotch served on the rocks with a shot of Cachaça

Vodka, Sake kamikaze with a handle of sherry a

Cherry brandy with a Jaeger chaser champagne float

A bourbon hot toddy in teacup of throat coat

Martini, Bellini, Negroni, Baileys, Kahlua, Sambuca

Soju, paloma, mojito, gimlet, Frangelico, Guinness

Tequila, manhattan, a margarita, old fashioned

Dry vermouth and something I can't taste 'cause I'm so trashed

Soldiering over I'm slower shoulder to shoulder with no one

Stumbling sobering making friends with a smoker

I know I'm less than upright, losing the fight with the ground

Then someone hits the lights as they close for the night now

Try to look at heaven and I can't see the stars

A billion trillion eyes are winking as I walk between parked cars

Metabolizing liquor while I'm losing my friends

I'm gonna hate myself tomorrow then I'll do it again

Feel so much better than usual

I feel indisputable

Oh

But now I'm feeling so beautiful

Don't wake me up from this spell I'm under if I'm still breathing

I know that I will be ugly when

I feel like myself again

Oh

But now I'm feeling so beautiful

My vision is blurry

As long as I'm thirsty

Nobody can hurt me, hurt me, hurt me

[nathank77]

6/2/24

3:02 a.m

As it was laundry day and I'm almost done. I also got to go into the attic my sister is going to move her junk tomorrow maybe.

I hugged my mom. I tried to wear my hoodie. But she never washes her hands. So I'm just going to use it for the attic cause I get dusty and gross up there. And whatever I wear up there needs to get washed. And I can wear it if I want to hug her tomorrow or something...

I wore it for a while but ultimately could not get in bed and let my back touch my pillows. I tried not to be avoidant. Usually I wouldn't hug her or I would and I would throw my hoodie into the laundry basket.. so not really a win with ocd but not an entire loss.

My head is pounding from hallucinating all day and being fucking tired... my tactile of my gums is driving me crazy... maybe I'll take an Ibuprofen soon.. I'm sick of taking 500 pills a day.... I'm hoping it passes soon...

Tomorrow if I don't feel like gaming I'm going to the car wash.. and I'll get my testosterone before I go- I went today but cvs appearantly closes at 6 p.m.. I walked in to a closed pharmacy.....

If I don't get my testosterone technically today I will go Monday... I'll put the car wash off at that point...

Hardcore nuketown starts this Tuesday and I'm hoping it's fun... I mean I'll give it a try and try to be hopeful. After hardcore barebones moshpit, I am not hopeful. I look more forward to barebones bc it's all the maps. Don't get me wrong I love nuketown... but it's nuketown 24/7 until Tuesday the 11th. No other maps. So variety. Don't think I don't want to play bo4 all day long from Tuesday the 4th to the 11th.. but I wish it was barebones... that's only 11 weeks away..

Anyways I'm trying to find someone. I've truly thrown in the towel on Elise. I'm just hopeful for friendship.... if it ever happens..

I mean as for online dating can't find anyone I look fucking weird without my glasses but I mean maybe that's just how I see myself. My options are wear them or don't since I'm going to be bald forever..

Beyond that I'm worried about sleeping... I'm hoping I don't have any hallucinations with mental pictures... but my life is a giant hallucination.. I'm worried about my Dr taking forever on approving xanax but I won't put the order in until the time is right cause otherwise I look like an addict and I'm the complete opposite... I'm putting it in on Monday.

I hope I sleep. I hope I find someone. I hope xanax isn't an issue. It could have been a Hypogogic hallucination... I had my eyes closed for like almost a hour... the water and noise...

Just had a flashback cause of writing that of a mental picture of me in first person looking at my phone... and then I heard call 911.... that one was really unsettling.... in November..

I'm sick of my life being one giant hallucination. I want to kill myself but I don't. I think I'm getting depression at this point. I don't do the things I love anymore bc my hallucination ruins everything... and I'm always alone and no one talks to me.

I'm going to end it all soon. I'm hoping very soon a light will shine in this very dark tunnel... cause at this point I'll never recover. Remission is shit. And I'm so fucking alone I don't want to be here anymore. My brain is so broken it isn't worth being Alive.

Maybe a girl will like me now before it's too late:

[wetookeachothershand]

Midnight Snack

Pairing: Sano Shinichiro x GN!Reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Swearing, one (1) NSFW innuendo

W/C: 1K+

Summary: Making stir-fried ramen for the Sano brothers while listening to the two argue over who you love more.

Additional: This is in no way me promoting grooming nor pedophilia, Mikey simply has a puppy crush on (Y/n).

Ultimate Masterlist | Shinichiro Masterlist | Tales of The Sano Family Masterlist

~Your P.O.V.~

"What are you doing?",a familiar voice asked causing me to jump.

"Shin, shh!",I said as I held a finger over my mouth.

Mikey laughed as he munched on his dorayaki.

"You makin' soup, sweetheart?",Shinichiro asked as he came over to where I was at the stove.

"Mhm. Want some?"

"Sure, your's is always good."

"I want some too,",Mikey said.

"Alright, there's more than enough for all three of us. Should we wake up Emma and see if she wants some too? We should let your grandfather rest."

"She should sleep, she has school tomorrow. So do you, Manjiro,",Shinichiro said as he looked at the young blonde.

"My (Y/n) radar went off and I woke up."

""(Y/n) radar"? Cute,",I said with a light laugh.

"(Y/n)!",Shinichiro whined.

"Hah! See, (Y/n) does like me better,",Mikey said as he stuck his tongue out at his older brother.

"You little-!"

"Shin, baby, can you help me? I don't wanna burn myself since I'm tired, and the pot is heavier than usual,",I said.

"Sure!",he said happily. "Take that, twerp. MY LOVER wants MY help, not YOURS,",Shinichiro said to Mikey before going over to me. "What do you need me to do?"

"Strain half a cup of water into the measuring cup, and then drain the rest of the water,",I said as I went over to Mikey who had a slight pout. I patted his head as I could hear Shinichiro pouring the water. "Don't worry, Mikey. Next time you can pour the water for me, you're strong."

His face immediately lit up. "We can make ramen after I get home from school and I can help. I like eating your ramen a lot."

"Aww thank you, Mikey. That's really sweet of you to say,",I said as I gave him a light hug.

"Where's my hug?",Shinichiro asked.

I giggled and went over to him, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for helping me, baby. Now then, time to finish cooking,",I said to myself as I poured the noodles into the pot, and the half cup of water. I put the stove on low and soon heard the two brothers starting to bicker again.

"Listen, they're not going to kiss your cheek. It took me forever to get a kiss on the cheek from them and we're dating."

"Maybe they just doesn't like you as much as you think they do,",Mikey said.

I shook my head, mixing in the liquid and then powder packets that came with the ramen into the pot. I tried to hold in my laugh as the conversation continued.

"As if,",Shinichiro said with a scoff. "We're going to be married to each other, and have children. Maybe they'll be more well-behaved than you."

"Oh please, if you're the father than they won't be. Besides, (Y/n) and I are getting married. When I get older they'll realize I'm the better Sano,",Mikey said as I cracked and added in two eggs.

"You're short, you think they'll even see you that way with your height?"

"Now, now, I don't care about the height of my lover,",I spoke up.

"Mhm,",Shinichiro said as he hugged me from behind.

"I'll win (Y/n)'s heart!",Mikey said confidently.

I shook my head with a laugh. "Can you both get bowls, chopsticks, and drinks please?",I asked.

They immediately nodded and got what I asked them to. I added some Kewpie Mayo and mixed it in. Mikey placed the bowls next to me on the counter and I divided the soup evenly into the three bowls. "Mikey, can you help me carry the bowls?"

"Yeah,",he said and grabbed two bowls. He placed the two down and I placed the other down.

Shinichiro finished placing everything on the table and we all sat down.

"Thank you for the food,",we all said and began eating.

"So good and creamy!",I said happily.

"I know what else is creamy-ow!",Shinichiro yelped as I kicked his shin.

"I dare you to continue,",I said as I gave him a menacing smile.

"I'm good,",he winced.

~later after the meal~

I washed the dishes with Shinichiro and Mikey as we all talked. "So Mikey, I heard you started a gang. Tokyo Manji Gang, right?"

"Yeah. We're going to be the best gang in all of Japan, and start a new age for delinquents,",he said confidently.

"Confident, I like that. Please promise me that you'll be careful though, I don't know what I'll do if I found out you ended up in the hospital."

"Don't worry, (Y/n)! I'm strong, unlike my idiot brother."

"Oh, shut up,",Shinichiro groaned. "You really love the sound of your own voice, don't you?"

"It's a lot better than yours."

I laughed at the two's bickering. "I love you both so much."

"I love you too,",Shinichiro said.

Mikey stayed quiet and we both looked at him. His face was red and his fists were clenched at his sides.

"Are you ok, Mikey?",I asked as I dried my hands, looking more at his face.

"L-Love you too, (Y/n),",he said quietly.

I smiled and brought him into a tight hug. "Man you're freaking cute!"

~Shinichiro's P.O.V.~

I smiled fondly as I watched (Y/n) hug Mikey. Soon the moment was ruined as Mikey stuck his tongue out at me while pulling on his cheek.

"You annoying ass kid! Go to sleep already!",I shouted.

"Shin!",(Y/n) scolded as they let go of Mikey and looked at me. "Be nicer to Mikey, baby."

"But (Y/n)-"

They shook their head. "Nope, don't wanna hear it."

I let out a sigh. "Fine."

They smiled. "You're right though, Mikey you should be going to sleep. You'll be tired at school tomorrow if you don't sleep soon."

"Alright. Goodnight, (Y/n)."

"Goodnight, Mikey."

"Night, Manjiro,",I said.

"Night,",he said and left (Y/n) and I alone in the kitchen.

We finished washing the dishes and went to my room, laying on my bed.

"I love you, (Y/n),",I said as our limbs intertwined with each other's.

"I love you too, Shinichiro. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Tag List Form

All rights are reserved to wetookeachothershand. Do not plagiarize, repost, translate, or claim my work~ ♡

[rphelperblog]

Queen of Air and Darkness Quote Rp Meme

final book in the TDA series by Cassandra Clare- feel free to edit or change pronouns for rp purposes

“As we all have an infinite capacity to make mistakes, we all have an infinite capacity for forgiveness.”

“Sympathy is common. Knowing the exact shape of the hole someone’s loss leaves in your heart is rare.”

“Making promises you can't keep is worse than making no promises at all.”

“I wish you could see yourself as I see you. You are so many things I never thought to want, but I do want them. I want all things with you.”

“One pancake at a time. Yes, I know you can get three in your mouth, but that doesn’t mean you should.”

“he and I are unafraid to express our manly love,”

“We cannot understand life, and therefore we cannot hope to understand death”

“Sometimes you have to Let people blame you. When the only other option is letting bad things happen, it doesn’t matter what people think.”

“Sometimes when you start a war, you want to make pancakes.”

“Some lights were never meant to burn for long.”

“The story that I love you, it has no end.”

tes far more joy than any pain it causes.”

“As long as you exist and I exist, I will love you.”

“Faith isn’t never having any doubts; it’s having what you need to overcome them.”

“I would that I had ever had a sibling who loved me as much as you love each other,”

"family is more than blood."

“Sometimes the bravest thing we can do is confront our own failings.”

“It had been a long time, and she had never imagined something quite like this: Moonlight and flowers were for other people.”

“Solutions aren’t usually mutually beneficial when one party has all the power,”

I forgot my weapons. But I do have this fork."

“Every choice has a long afterlife of consequences. No one can know the eventual outcome of any decision. All you can do is make the best choice you can make in the moment.”

“At the edge of everything, love and faith have always brought me back, and back to you.”

“I could slay with my deadly sense of humor and wicked charm,

“Grief can be so bad you can’t breathe, but that’s what it means to be human. We lose, we suffer, but we have to keep breathing.”

He loved one man so much he changed the world for him.’ ”

“You may not yourself be luminous, but you are an extraordinary conductor of light.”

"She definitely has a temper.I like it."

“What is a book? Is it the binding, the ink, the pages, or the sum of the words contained?”

“Sometimes you need to guard people against the things they want, as well as the things they fear.”

“Be good, my archer boy. Come back to me.”

“Words about things that are beautiful and precious to me don’t come easily. You know that. You know me better than anyone.”

“When I found you, I didn’t know what I was finding,"

“But I think you’re letting your fear get in the way of what you really want because what you really want is what you’re afraid of.”

“We are all guilty. And therefore we will all vote, as a reminder that every voice counts, and when you choose not to use your voice, you are letting yourself be silenced.”

“Be careful what masks you wear, child, lest you lose your true face forever.”

“Sometimes he carries me around like a swooning damsel.”

“This is the nature of having of a soul, and a heart. We all stumble around in the dark and we cause each other pain and we try to make up for it the best we can. We are all confused.”

“I still love her more than I ever thought was possible. I love her more every day, and more every time I try to stop. I love her like I'm being ripped in half.”

“Don’t remain silent about what you want, or you may never get it.”

“You're the only person I've ever loved like this, and I know you're the only person I ever will. And I'm not myself without you. Once you dissolve dye in water, you can't take it back out. It's like that. I can't take you out of me. It means cutting out my heart, and I don't like myself without my heart, I know that now.”

“People were made up of all sorts of different bits,. Funny bits and romantic bits and selfish bits and brave bits. Sometimes you saw only a few of them. Maybe it was when you saw them all that you realised you knew someone really well.”

‘Let it be that you should know no further sorrow.”

“Have you learned nothing from the way Batman’s parents died?”

"I was angry at you. I missed you. But I didn't stop loving you."

“Sometimes you cannot be loyal to everyone.”

"There's plenty of room for me to hate them all".”

“Take care, mèi mei.”

“You might be in the cage, but as long as you are like this, I am in the cage with you.” 

I missed your lunatic schemes.”

“But you’re the love I chose. Out of everyone in the world, out of everyone I’ve ever known, I chose you. I’ve always had faith in that choice. At the edge of everything, love and faith have always brought me back, and back to you.”

“It's hard to focus on your love life when giant spiders are chasing you.”

“I’m not sure I can cope with feline death on a massive scale.”

“Let us burn.”

“Have you ever wanted a really big tapestry of yourself?”

“You never thought for a second about it diminishing you to have a girl as your warrior partner, you never acted as if I was anything less than your complete equal. You never for a moment made me feel like I had to be weak for you to be strong.”

“In the meantime, I must ask you to remove yourself from my leg. You are sitting on it and it is becoming quite painful.”

“There are times, I think, where we’re each called. Where we can choose to rise up or not to rise up.”

“Some monsters are human”

ou're the most generous, and you spend the most time thinking about what makes other people happy. I think you should do whatever makes you happy. You deserve it.”

“Another night, a different boy with blue eyes. Wet weather in London, but when was it anything else?”

“But even if they fit differently now, they still fit like sisters.”

“I didn’t know if you’d want me to come in,”

“There’s nothing you could do to me that I wouldn’t want, because it’s you.”

“I want you to touch me,"

“I want to go slowly, I want to feel everything.”

“I want a war council,”

“Grief could be like a wolf tearing your insides, and you would do anything to make it stop.”

“Maybe that was why she liked horror movies; the dead never stayed dead, and those left behind were too busy wandering unwisely around in the woods to have time to grieve or feel loss.”

The thought of him lit a spark of warmth in her heart. She closed her hand carefully around the petals.”

“But so was any kind of love, and if love was a weakness, it was a strength, too.”

“I prefer redheads myself.”

“I cannot bear these inside spaces. And I have missed you so much. Will you come into the desert with me?”

“It seems the rumours of our death have been greatly exaggerated.”

“I could slay with my deadly sense of humor and wicked charm.”

[violettelueur]

RYŌMEN SUKUNA || BONDED FOREVER

| featuring : ryōmen sukuna ft. itadori yuji and fushiguro megumi from jujutsu kaisen

| warnings : grammar errors and some graphic/violent actions

| form : imagine 

| word count : 1749

| published : 03 december

| request : Can I a request a imagine where it’s super fluffy for Sukuna? I was wondering it can have a story of how he had a wife and she had reincarnated into someone who’s a powerful sorcerer? But she’s the soulmate for Sukuna..does this make sense at all? I hope you know what I mean😭😭

| barista’s notes : hey hey hey guys~ sorry for the really sort upfates, i’ve been having som difficulties writing some of these imagines due to a lack of ideas and writer’s block ʕ ᵒ ᴥ ᵒʔ but i hope you all had a good day today ʕ≧ᴥ≦ʔ but for me, other than coming home at around 5pm in the dark winter night, i had a decent day ʕ – ᴥ – ʔ also i don't think i answered this request properly, so i really do apologies ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ other than that, i hope you enjoy you cup of classic black coffee (jujutsu kaisen request!) and please come back soon!

The sweet aroma invaded your sense of smell, as you blissfully admired the array of flower petals that surround you in the warm water that you were sitting in right now. Gently, you glided your hand across the water, watching the petals also softly move with the direction of the current causing some of them to stick to your hand like a tattoo. However, before you could even move your hand again to keep you somewhat entertained, you felt an unexpectanted grip on your wrist, only for the same hand to be pulled up as the person behind you placed a kiss within your inner palm causing you to turn around to see what your husband was intending to do.

The man behind you, who still has his lips on your palm, opened his eyes to showcase his charming scarlet eyes as he looked down upon you only for him to smile softly at you - a rare smile that he only reserved for you and you only. Smiling softly back to him, you took the opportunity to caress his cheek as you admired the black markings that were permanently painting on his skin.

To him, at this current moment in time, you were at your most beautiful state as the water glistened beautifully on your bare skin with some of the petals stuck on to you, making you look like a painting made by the greatest artist with your hair stuck upon your neck due to it being soaked with the water that you and him were in right now.

“What’s going on in that little mind of yours?” Sukuna quietly asked as he leaned forward to place a heavy kiss upon your lips, leaving you no room to answer his question as you were so concentrated on the euphoric feeling to which then you felt his arms slowly wrap around your small figure, entrapping you in his embrace, leaving you no choice but to completely turn your body to face him as you then placed your leg on either side of him causing some of the water to overflow over the wooden bath, but that left no concern for you or the King of Curses.

“Nothing,” you answered him with a heavy breath once your both pulled apart, but still this little thought of yours was still plaguing your mind. “Don’t lie to me little one, you know better than not to lie to me ever,” Sukuna muttered, as his hand snaked from tracing your collarbone to having a light hold on your neck. However, it wasn’t the usual hold he would have against his opponent where his grip would tighten to disturb the airflow leading to the suffocation the unfortunate victim but rather a comforting gesture as his thumb moved up and down, expressing to you that you were able to open up to him about anything that was troubling your mind.

“When I pass, I came to the realisation that it won’t bother you at all,” you admitted to him with a soft smile, as you run your hand through his dampened hair. Although, the curse himself, exhibited the opposite reaction to what you were expressing right now making him wonder what caused you to question your importance to him. 

“Little one, when you state that absurd comment, it does nothing but infuriate me,” Sukuna voiced out to you as he leaned forward towards you - to the point where you were chest to chest - before leaving a few kisses upon your jawline. “When you pass, I will have no idea how to control myself. I may be sadistic in nature but you have calmed me down to extreme lengths that sometimes I am scared to admit. When you pass, I have nothing left to hold, no other person can take your place. Ever.” Sukuna expressed to you as he then leaned back to look at you in the eye, only to see your surprised express to his admission, “don’t ever, let that ridiculous idea come to plague your mind again Y/N, you are mine for eternity as I am yours, there is no escape from it, we are bonded forever,”.

“Forever ha?” you repeated him in a light breath, only for him to pull you into another heated kiss as his hands began to wonder around your body as if he was tracing everything to memory. Your body, your heart and your soul was entirely bonded to him as the same goes for him to you. As he said, there was no escape from it.

                                              ꕥ

“Sorry, but he’s not coming back” 

Stood frozen, you didn’t have the strength to look back on who was behind you nor did you want to lose sight of Fushiguro, knowing out of the both of you, he was in the most danger. 

“Don’t be so frightened, I’m in a good mood right now, since I get to physically see you again Y/N, so let’s chat for a bit” Sukuna cunningly commented, causing you to widen your eyes while the cold sweat behind your back began to intensify, fearful on what the King of Curses intended for you.

‘I need to quickly get Fushiguro to a safe place….but how? Damn it! How?’

However, before you could even move, the King of Curses decided that he would move for you to present himself to both of yours and Fushiguro’s view. “This is what he gets for trying to use me without any kind of pact, feels like he’s having some trouble switching back,” Sukuna stated as if he was explaining on why Itadori couldn’t gain control even after showcasing back in Sendai that he could.

“Still, though it’s a matter of time,” Sukuna continued to talk as he casually ripped off the top of Itadori’s uniform, showcasing the black markings on his body. On the other hand, what happened next caused you and Fushiguro to widen your eyes in terror as Sukuna suddenly viciously stabbed himself in the chest with his hand before slowly taking out the beating heart that was inhibiting Itadori’s body.

“I’m taking this brat hostage”

Finally having the guts to move your body, using the extremely little gap of time you had, you swiftly grabbed onto Fushiguro’s sleeve before speedily using your curse energy to form a protective sphere around his body leaving you alone in the open to any attacks the special grade curse could use on you now.

“Y/N!” Fushiguro shouted while beginning to violently bang his arms on the orb that you had manifested around him, trying to obtain a crack or a weak spot to let him out. “What are you doing you, idiot?!” Fushiguro then questioned you in a state of panic, trying to gain some understanding of what you were planning. However, you didn’t answer.

“Your goodwill stayed with you even after 1000 years, there’s nothing more than I expected from my little one, though I am frustrated at the fact that it isn’t reserved for me” 

Still somewhat fearful but now confused, you quickly used your curse energy to construct a black katana out of thin air, before raising up to point the tip to Sukuna’s neck. “Oh?” Sukuna expressed before smiling at you with such pride expressed on his face, “it’s been such a long time since you have threatened me like that Y/N, you were powerful in words back then but now you gained powers of a sorcerer, what a magnificent discovery,”.

‘What can I do? I have a limit of summoning 20 weapons at the same time but is that even enough to even get a single scratch on him?’ 

“Do you not remember me? Little one, you look as beautiful as you did that night, your hair wet from the rain and your skin still beautiful glistens then the water hits your face” Sukuna playfully commented, as he took a step closer to you causing you to take one step back.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you finally spoke to the man in front of you, only for him to smirk even wider. However, before he could even get another single word in, you immediately summoned another 19 weapons - maximizing your limit -  from spear, swords and axes behind him, only for all of then to immediately come down with a powerful strike causing a large explosion to erupt as dust from the ground suddenly flared up, blinded your view as well as Fushiguro’s causing his anxiety to heighten on what was going on and where you were.

“You always somehow impressed me, little one. There is never a day where I am disappointed,” a deep voice commented, causing you to widen your eyes once you saw Sukuna standing right in front of you with an uncharacteristic soft smile on his face - leaving you in an extreme state of confusion once a blurred image of a man smiling at you slowly constructed in your mind.

“Why?” you question yourself in a perplexed tone.

‘How?’

“Why do I suddenly feel like I've seen you smile at me like that before?” you quietly questioned, still engulfed in the dusty smoke that was surrounding the both of you. Slowly and gently gripping on to the wrist on your other hand, Sukuna slowly raised it up before placing a small kiss within the palm of your hands causing an almost unnoticeable tiny electric current to travel up your arm to the kissed palm - as if it was something that your body suddenly remembered.

“We are bonded forever, remember that little one” Sukuna declared to you in a softer tone than he had expressed earlier before the black markings slowly started to fade indicating to you that Itadori was steadily coming back, causing you to drop your katana and open your arms once you felt his heavy body fall upon yours.

“Itadori?” you quietly called, still hoping that he was alive somehow even without the use of the vital organ that was now out of his body.

“Y/N?” Itadori called out to you just in time as the dust around you began to fade, “I’m almost done for, but I guess I don’t have to worry you, Fushiguro, Kugisaki and Gojo-sensei anymore, live a long life,”, but before you could even get a single sound in to tell him that he was going to be okay, you felt his body slowly go limp indicating to you that he was now gone.

“Bonded forever?”

[fictionalmenmakemecry]

Fearful of Forgetting

Characters: Deacon St. John X Reader

Request: @lunarastrobabe "Female reader overhears deacon talking to boozer about Sarah and she feels hurt and betrayed and is cold towards him then they have an argument about it and she asks if he loves her at all but then they make up and it’s a happy ending for them❤️"

Summary: In the past 2 years, you've grown strong feelings for the person who's protected you and kept you together when you wanted to crumble. Deacon has been holding something back. You find out the struggles that he's been having between holding onto his past and moving forward with his future.

Warnings: Cursing, Angst, Fluff

As I gaze into the fire, the coldness of the night left my body. I raised my hands to the flames taking in all the heat. I looked over across the camp fire to see Boozer sharping his knife peacefully. In that moment, it felt like life was normal. I could ignore the shit storm that has happened the last two years. It just seemed like we were hanging out around a camp fire on a fall night. Nothing more, nothing less.

I realise that if this shit storm never happened I would have never ran into him. Deacon. My rock for the past while. Kept me together while I wanted to fall apart. Protected me when I crumbled and never left me alone. I smiled to myself to know how lucky I was to have these people around me in a time like this.

Deacon sat down beside on me on the log of wood we shared. I looked over to see his eyes closed, taking in the warmth that we've been missing. I wanted to look at him forever, just watch him... exist. He had no idea how I felt about him. We got closer over the years, I tried to give hints but I didn't push it. I feared that we would lose what we had if I did.

"This feels good" Deacon groaned sitting back more on the log.

"Hell ya brother" Boozer chuckled inspecting the blade of his knife upon the fire.

"You okay? You seem quiet" Deacon asked facing your direction but keeping an eye on the fire.

"I'm okay, just taking it all in. It nearly seems like a normal night. Just all of us hanging around camp fire" I smiled looking down at my hands picking at an old scab.

"You can say that again." Boozer smirked

"Do you ever think about where you be if.. things were different?" I asked, feeling a tinge of nostalgia.

"No. I don't" Deacon said bluntly.

"Yeah, I don't see much point in it" Boozer sighed

Time went by, we all stayed silent. Deacon seemed to be deep in thought. For the past couple of days I could feel this coldness between us. I didn't want to overthink it but it didn't leave my mind. He seemed to be not present as much, when I asked him if he wanted to go on a supply run a couple of days ago, he turned it down and continued on cleaning his rifle. He was usually up for anything especially knowing how well we get on together.

What made me over think it was, last week we were collecting fire wood for the winter which was a job we did pretty often to make sure we were ready for the harsh dark nights ahead. The sun was starting to set and we gathered the last few pieces of wood.

"After everything that has happened, I'm glad this hasn't changed" I paused looking over at the horizon. We were were pretty high up which gave us the widest view of everything below us.

Deacon walked over and gazed at the intense warm spectrum of colours spreading across the sky.

"Yeah, you're right about that" He spoke softly.

We stood there for a couple of minutes. I bend down to pick up last piece of wood off the ground and felt something sharp jab into my finger.

"Shit" I breathed pulling my brows together to see what hurt.

"You alright?" Deacon walked toward me.

"Yeah, just a splinter. These fuckers hurt so much" I continued to look at it, pushing my skin together to pop the splinter out.

No luck, it was really wedged in there. I dropped the piece of wood that caused it and leaned more towards to the fading light to get a better angle.

"Come here, let me have a look" Deacon held my wrist gently bringing his head down and focused on the injury.

I could feel him putting pressure on my finger trying to squeeze it out. I looked down to see how big his hands were compared to mine but how delicate he still was, making sure not to cause me more pain.

"I think I nearly got it" He continued to squeeze my fingers.

"Try and suck the last bit out" He brought his eyes to mine and smiled softly.

I put my finger in my mouth and sucked it, trying to see if I could feel the piece of wood come out. I pulled out my finger and analysed it again.

"Got it!" I grinned seeing the dot of blood oozing out of the fresh wound.

We both focus on the wound making sure there was no piece left over when I realised how close Deacon was to me. I could feel his heat coming off his body. We both looked up noticing the closeness of each other. At this point, there was barely any light left and all I could see was the outline of his features and glint in his eyes. It was completely quiet but I could hear his breathing so well. I felt a million butterflies bouncing around in my stomach knowing what could happen next. I glanced down at his lips feeling the urge to lean in and press them against mine. But I hesitated. He leaned down ever so slightly, bring his head closer to mine. I could feel his breath hitting my lips until we delicately brought them together. His lips were cold and soft giving me goosebumps. I breathed out through my nose feeling all my body just let go of any tension. I sensed myself getting pulled into him without any outside force. I realised how starved I was from any touch. I could feel him lightly caress my chin as we deepened the kiss. I brought my hands onto his chest. I could his hear a quiet moan coming from the back of his throat.

Out of nowhere I could hear the crackling of his radio on his chest. We broke the kiss immediately and pulled away, bringing us both back to reality.

"Deek? You nearly done with the wood?" Boozers voiced radiated out of the radio.

Deacon took a step back avoiding all eye contact with me and pressed the button to respond.

"Yeah Boozeman, just about to head back" He cleared his throat.

He picked up the last pieces of wood that we dropped at the beginning of all of this.

"We better head back" Deacon glanced back but never meeting my eyes.

I nodded into agreement covering the disappointment I felt inside on how fast the atmosphere changed.

Since then, Deacon barely even looked at me or spoken to me. My mind was going wild try to figure what was going on in his head but I was afraid to ask. I didn't want to hear what I might have already figured out. That he regret what he did and it was a mistake. The kiss made me understand that the feelings I had for Deacon were stronger and deeper than I thought. It made me even more scared to lose him.

I brought myself back to the present moment feeling the same sinking feel of anguish I felt back at the forest. I wanted to go to sleep and hope that this feeling would go away.

"I think I might go to bed" I tucked my hair behind my ear, glancing at Boozer and Deacon.

"This early?" Deacon looked at me, for the first time all day.

I nodded, said goodnight and got up from the log. I made my way up the steps until reaching the top of the watch tower. I looked down and watching them for a couple of minutes. They didn't share any words and just seemed to be enjoying the fire.

I made my way to my mattress, which was beside the doorway in the corner, on Boozer side of the room. It wasn't much but it was dry and soft. Enough for a goodnight sleep.

I plopped myself down and rolled over to my side bring my blanket over me and closed my eyes. I felt myself drift off to sleep.

----------------------------

I woke up to the sound of slight murmur from below. I must have only dozed off for a couple of hours. I felt wide awake and couldn't relax. I sat up, rubbing my eyes getting adjusted to the darkness. I could see a low amber glow in the room giving me the indication that the fire was still going strong. I unsteadily got to my feet and looked out the window to see Deacon and Boozer still haven't moved but seemed to be talking.

Deacon was leaned over closer to the fire. I wanted to know what he was saying. I wanted to know why he was so cold lately. I quietly walked over to the door and opened it gingerly. I didn't want to draw Boozer's attention as he was facing the door. I peeped down and he seem engrossed in conversation. I sat on my honkers to get lower and closer to the sound. I focused trying to zone in on Deacon's deep calm voice.

"I don't know Boozer.. I had everything I wanted" He somberly sighed

"You can't keep holding onto this"

"She was my life. All I think about is her. That night at the waterfall, when she said yes." He paused " I could see myself growing old with her."

"I know man. It's tough but if you keep going on like this. It's going to eat you up inside"

"Yeah, maybe I deserve it" Deacon mumbled.

I could feel my heart sink. All that time thinking I did something wrong. I was thinking that maybe he would see me more than just a friend. I felt stupid to think that I was anything special to Deacon.

Tears ran down my cheeks. All my emotions just erupted from the last couple of years. I was overwhelmed with sadness, hopelessness and pure loneliness. After years of this, I'm starved from intimacy or even touch. It was getting to me. I wrapped my arms around myself and gripped tight to give myself any comfort that was possible.

I could hear the familiar sound of the steps creaking down below. I got up on my tippy toes and briskly made my way back to my bed. I turned over to face the wall. I quickly wiped my tear stained cheeks and tucked my blanket over me and closed my eyes.

I could hear their foot steps coming closer. The movement stopped for a moment, which sounded just outside the ajar door.

"Hold on" I heard Boozer whisper. "You're allowed to be happy, she wouldn't want it any other way" I could hear Deacon sigh and quietly opened the door. There was shuffling for a couple of moments as they both got ready for bed. Within a couple moments, I could heard the soft snore of Boozer.

I turned over to face Deacon's and Boozer's bed and opened my eyes slightly. I could see Deacon laying on his back with his arm resting above his head. I know he wasn't sleeping. He breathing wasn't peaceful, it would hitch to different rhythms.

Apart of me wanted to get up and sit by him. I wanted to stroke his hair and comfort him. The words of the recent conversation just came to my mind and made my heart heavy. The thought of knowing he didn't feel the same way about me like I did about him. He just wanted Sarah. Even after everything we've been through, he still only wanted Sarah. The most hurtful thing is knowing I won't be wanted by anyone as much as Sarah was. That was the knife in the heart.

I didn't want to be in the same room as Deacon. I needed space and air. I needed to calm down and let go of some of the emotions I was holding back at this very moment. I slowly got up from my bed and put on some shoes and a jacket. I didn't care if Deacon heard me. It's not like he cared, he pretty much ignored me this whole week.

I opened and closed the door gently behind me and went down the steps. I could feel the cold crisp air hitting my cheeks which felt on fire right now from how upset I was. Before I even reached the ground, I could feel tears spilling over again. I felt all the pain in my chest overwhelm me. It was heartache. I went over to the dying fire, it was still throwing out intense heat. The glow was slowly dying from it. I couldn't stop crying. I could feel my head pulse. I pulled my sleeve over my hands and wiped my tears. My eyes and nose didn't stop running and I didn't care. I just wanted to let it out so I would be able to ease the pain. I had no idea how long I sat there, it could have been hours and I would have not known.

"Hey" I heard a soft whisper from behind me.

I snapped my head back, startled from the sudden presence of someone. I looked away and wiped my eyes and nose quickly wanting to hide the fact I was sobbing. But I think it was a little too late for that.

"Hi" I whispered barely audible.

It was Deacon. He was the last person I wanted to see right now. I didn't look at him. I kept my eyes on the dying fire. I didn't want him to see how much of a mess I was right now. He sat on the other end of the log leaving a space between us.

He didn't say a word. We sat there for what felt like half the night. I wanted to steady my emotions before I said anything. I didn't even know what to say. I had so many feelings towards him. I was unbearably sad, immensely angry and undeniably in love with him.

"Why haven't you spoken to me since the kiss?" I asked hearing the shake in my voice.

I heard him take a deep breath, like he knew this was going to come. I could see him in the corner of my eye twisting one his rings around his finger mindlessly.

"I-I don't know" He murmured

I closed my eyes for a brief moment, knowing what I was going to ask was going to hurt and that it needed to be done. I wanted to move on and I needed to face the truth.

"You still miss her, don't you?" I asked knowing the answer already.

"I do, very much so" He responded his voice still soft.

We sat there in silence for awhile. I wanted to see if he had anything to say.

He didn't say a word.

I took a deep breath to try and steady my voice.

"Do you regret.... kissing me?" My voice broke off feeling a lump build up in my throat.

I brought my eyes up from the fire and looked over. He looked somber but I could tell he was upset. He had his jaw clenched.

"Y/n.... Why would you think that?" He shook his head in disbelief.

"Deek, you haven't spoken a word to me or even glanced in my direction since then." I felt my voice start to crumble.

I clenched my teeth and felt a tear fall. I took another deep breath to keep my composure as much as possible.

"I know, I know" He brought his hands up to his face rubbing his eyes stressfully.

"I wish I could just tell you what the hell is going on up here" He continued holding his head.

"Tell me!" I cried wiping tears away

"I can't, I'm... I'm afraid" He voice turned into a desperate whisper.

I shook my head in confusion. I didn't understand what was going on. He turned towards me and leaned over. He took my hands away from my face and looked straight into my eyes for the first time in awhile. His eyes turned soft when he saw me crying. He brought one of his hands up to my face and gently wiped away my tears.

".. of what?" I sniffed as he gently stroked my red swollen cheeks.

"Hurting you.." He sighed

I felt my stomach drop a little more. I looked down at our hands. He thumb was caressing my knuckles. I wanted to take in the feeling of him being close to me as this might be one of the last times we would be this close. Even this state of distressed caused by him, I felt myself calming down in his presence when nothing was said.

I could see him searching his brain trying to breakdown what he was thinking. He sighed realising there was probably no easy way to say this. I braced myself from the potential damage that could be done.

"This is Sarah's and mine engagement anniversary. This was the week I proposed at the waterfall and saw my whole future with her" He spoke gently making sure to keep an eye on my reaction.

"For the past couple of years, I've been slowly letting go. When you appeared, you distracted me from the life I could have had. You let me see another path that wasn't so bad." He continued

"The kiss we had was... something I haven't had in years" I looked up to see his mouth coming to a soft smile.

"It scared me, it made me realised that I might be moving on from Sarah. That I was forgetting about her. That I was denying her existence in my life..... because the pain wasn't there anymore. How would I know if my love for her was ever real if the pain of losing her wasn't there anymore?" He breathed out and his head went down.

I saw a tear fall from his face onto the ground. He brought his shoulder up to wiped his cheek. He looked back up, his eyes red.

"I feel guilty, I feel so guilty about us. I feel guilty about the feelings I felt with Sarah, I know feel with you." Another tear rolled down his cheek and I couldn't bare to see him shed another.

I came closer to him. I bringing my hands up to his face and gently wiping away the tear. I leaned into him feeling his hands wrap around me bringing me closer to him. He rested his head on mine and I could hear his heartbeat. It was racing. He was so worried about how I was going to react.

"I don't know Sarah but I know that she would want you to be happy" I whispered

"I know, Boozer told me the same thing. I just wish I didn't have this feeling" Deacon squeezed his arms around me.

"Maybe the feeling pain, grew into guilt to show that you really did love Sarah and that maybe it was time to let go of the last piece and trust that you'll never forget about her" I continued.

"How does everyone see what I can't see. Boozer also said that too" He chuckled lightly followed by a sniffle.

"I'm sorry, I'm putting you through all of this. I'm a mess when it comes to my past." He explained, we leaned back to see each other.

"I really thought that you didn't want to be near me" I looked down feeling upset by what I just said.

"Y/n, I was avoiding you because I was trying to avoid the feelings that were growing so strong. I didn't know what to do with them." He raised my head up to look into my eyes.

"I didn't realise how much I hurt you in the process and I'm sorry for that" He flickered between both of my eyes making sure I was taking in what he was saying.

I nodded not knowing what to say next.

"You've healed me in so many ways. The happiness you've given me, makes me scared to lose you. I know the feeling of losing someone like you and I don't think I could go through it again. But I can't live in fear anymore" He caress my cheek.

"I'm sorry for making you shed all though tears. You didn't deserve it" He smiled gently.

"Deek, I've been falling for you since the day I landed my eyes on you." I searched his warm eyes.

We gazed into each other's eyes and felt completely smitten.

He took a deep breath and brought my hand up to his lips to kiss. I could feel my cheeks heat up for a different reason this time.

"Y/n, I'm unconditionally in love with you" He smiled

We leaned in and kissed. He lips were still cold but the kiss was gentle like he wanted to heal all the pain he had caused. He brought both of his hands up to my jaw and felt the kiss deepened. I felt his mouth open a little brushing his tongue along my lip. I leaned in more wanting to be as close to him as possible. I let his tongue dance with mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck, with that, he brought his hands down to my thighs and lifted me on to his lap. I straddled him as we continue to kiss. I could feel his hands rest on my waist. I played with his hair on the back of his neck. It was welcomed with a moan escaping from the back of his throat.

We broke our kiss and brought our foreheads together.

"I love you" I whispered smiling so much cheeks started to hurt

"I love you too" Deacon beamed

I could feel his strong hands on my back, making sure I stayed close to him. I felt his body warmth spreading along mine. I wanted to touch every part of him. I traced the tattoos on his neck and kissed them earning a moan from him.

For the rest of the night, we didn't move. We stayed as close as possible taking in each other. The cold made us closer as I was embraced in his arms.

Since then, the only place I feel safest and at home is in Deacon arms.

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