#i don't know where I was going with this

[layaart]

a lichen creature

[luceafarul-de-dimineata]

You know what, yandere Lucifer being a horrified medical professional at MC's condition. Very little NSFW but still enough to make me put a below the cut just in case

Yandere Lucifer brainrot (NSFWish)

Lucifer was called to look after the sick Solomon decendent

While he didn't exactly appreciate being interupted from his pleasant chat with Gamigin, if it was for you he could make an exception.

The voice on the phone talked some nonsense about a Christmas cold, but it was common for the less than enlightened in the field of medicine to make up strange names for already known deseases

He got up and brought Marbas along just to be sure, but what he found was simply pitiful

You were on the bed, exhausted, shivering, simply pathetic... I mean, more than usual...

Lucifer stared with pity and concern... yet he has had to deal with much worse. What really shocked him was one he did some questioning to the kings and they admited they knew the cure to your issue yet refused to administer it to you.

Under Lucifer's terrifying glare, the other kings' pride disipated as fast as it formed. The fallen angel only whispered and the crowd left the room.

He was aware of the other devils' incompetance, but this was something else. Were they that wrapped up in their grandious fantasies of fairytale romance that they didn't realise just how much pain they were forcing onto you?

While the others, under Lucifer's command, ran to get that cure, he had a patient to take care of him.

You were barely awake, fever overtaking your fragile, useless body, Lucifer gently pet your head, stroking your hair gently. The same pity he felt for Gamigin so many years ago, he started getting overcomed by once more.

"Child of Adam... stay with me. You shall not suffer in my pressence. Rest well for I am here to help you. Shh..."

His voice lulls you into a relaxing rest. You don't even have any other unholy thoughts your head empty, only rest in your mind.

You awaken to the feeling of a syringe being injected into you with surgical precission, the liquid inside calming your feverish impulses.

Before you could make sense of your situation, Lucifer was holding you like a baby and petting your back, humming a sweet song.

He sits down, placing you on his lap, licking the fresh tears from your cheeks, leaving butterfly kisses wherever he dragged his tongue. He felt particularly loving right now, your tears... those damn tears...

Salty tears dragging down your face, leaving wet trails for him to follow up to your shiny eyes. Even when at your filthiest, those tears cleaned the dirt and purified your soul, showing Lucifer what he always loved most, your innocence. You were but a newborn in his ancient eyes, a new born that was clearly being handled poorly by the six kings.

You were so weak! And the kings clearly didn't have your better interest at mind. He decided that the only thing he can do is take you under his wing and protect you from the dangers outside.

Maybe you would try to escape his grasp, maybe you'll just accept your fate, it doesn't really matter what you want, Lucifer can rewrite the laws of nature, your will is no match for his devine powers

He would constantly do check-ups on you, make sure that your body functioned properly, though you're starting to question some of his methods.

Sure, him holding you by the throat while you sit on his lap, your back to his chest, is totally to check your pulse and nothing else

The ways he orders you to bend are just to test your flexibility, his gropping is to check your skin for lumps, he only makes you cockwarm him so he can get a proper feel of your internal temperature, the tears that cascade down your visage are just a plus in his books, your way of thanking him for the care

Don't you dare complain about him. You remeber getting sick? How all the other kings so selfishly witheld the medicine from you in your time of need. You don't want that again, do you?

In all honestly, he is the best doctor ever, so at least you get free unlimited health care

[aeveni]

Despite everything, you're still tormenting me

[crouching-in-ashes]

Evan loving taxidermy and Barty loving killing things.

Barty coming back to his and Evan's apartment with a suspiciously shaped bag and tossing it at Evan, who gives him a look and then scurrys off to do his thing.

months later a new rare kind of Owl joins the rest. another pair of unblinking glass eyes added to the rest of the dead things Evan had graced with the illusion of life.

[mmso-notlikethat]

It's been 3 months, Buck baked every single thing in the universe that could be baked, and those urges to reach out to Tommy have never been stronger

So he decided that he had enough, it doesn't matter anymore if no one thinks its a good idea, if everybody keep telling him its a bad choice, he is going to talk to Tommy today and no one is stopping him

He opened the message thread between them and started typing, "Hey... how are you?" Nope, delete."Yo, what are you doing?" What the hell Buck, he isn't your buddy, delete. "You are an asshole Tommy" No, that's not what i really want to say, delete. Delete, delete, delete...

and his eyes started burning because three months ago, this was the easiest, most natural thing he would do, pick up the phone, and just text tommy whatever his fingers would write and now he cant even ask him a simple question

So he called Tommy, that's easier, he will figure out what to say when Tommy picks up. Yeah, that seemed logical.. after the 3rd unanswered call, the anger in his chest was about to burst, Tommy who answered every time buck called, didn't matter if it was in the middle of the night, during shift, while he was out with some other friends, he answered every single time, what do you mean he isn't answering...

Oh wait, the anger turned into fear, he isn't answering, tommy would always answer his phone, "What if he's in trouble and he needs my help?" His mind goes again

Oh fuck it, he grabs his jacket, his keys, and march to his truck. Only after he is halfway to Tommy's he thinks that Tommy could be on a shift, but well, he is halfway there whatever he'll see himself

Good Tommy's truck is there, which means he is home, the lights in his living room were off, and the house felt way too quiet. Buck launched to the front door, rang the bell, and after one second, he started knocking aggressively, "Open this door, Tommy, you don't get to ignore me. You hear that? I've been calling you, and you are not answering? Really? That's it? you wouldn't even answer after i called three fucking times?" For three minutes he kept knocking until he felt his hand burning

"You know what? I'm coming in. I don't care, Tommy!" He fished the spare key he knew Tommy kept under one of the fake stones, his hands were shaking, mirroring the state of his heart, he was terrified of every horrible scenario his mind was giving him at that moment, as he was furious of the fact that Tommy could ever ignore him

His shaky hands didn't make the whole mission easier. The second between unlocking the door and entering the house felt like an eternity. As soon as he stepped inside, he felt the coldness, the house where he always felt warmth and welcome, where he felt like he was at home. He stopped for a second thinking what–

As Buck stood in the silent house, his unease grew with every passing second. The place felt wrong—off. The dust on the furniture was undisturbed, thick enough to suggest weeks of neglect.

Dust. Tommy hated dust-he was borderline obsessive about keeping his home spotless, often wiping down counters or dusting furniture as a reflex.

The air had a faint, stale quality to it, lacking the usual warmth and subtle scents that always reminded him of Tommy. His eyes flicked to the calendar by the fridge, and his stomach twisted. It still showed the date from two months ago, like a snapshot frozen in time.

His grip on his phone tightened, his frustration bubbling over as he paced back and forth.

"What the hell, Tommy? You don’t just vanish! I called you three times—three times! And nothing? Not even a text?"

His voice cracked as his anger shifted to fear, and he stopped pacing, his eyes darting around the room. "This isn’t like you," he muttered, more to himself than anyone.

His hands trembled as he fumbled trying to hold on something, the sharp edge of panic clawing at his chest. "You better have a good reason for this, Tommy," he whispered, but his voice lacked conviction.

Deep down, he already knew this wasn’t nothing—something was very, very wrong.

[coldemergency]

Harry: Is that a snake in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Voldemort: That’s my wand you degenerate buffoon

Harry: You mean the wand that’s currently in your hand??

Voldemort: …

Harry: Wait, then what-

*Lord Voldemort's pocket moves and a small forked tongue pokes out*

Harry: Oh shit, it’s actually a snake lol

[lucianalight]

I love that Agatha All Along despite bringing many familiar elements and tropes from witch-themed stories and folklore, is stereotypical in a best nonstereotypical way.

When it comes to witchcraft the focus of the story is more on the craft side of it. It is less about power, and more about knowledge, understanding, skill and art the members of the coven are capable of. It is the combination of all these traits and abilities that let them survive their trials. I especially like that art has been one of the aspects of each trial. Jen's potions so far have been healing, medicine that is said to be both science and art. But potions can also be linked to cooking, a craft and an art. Music and singing are crafts and arts too.

And then there's the matter of "witch" as a negative label that historically targeted people who didn't conform. A lot of times those people were "evil women" who were said to steal and kill babies, or harm and heal with their knowledge. Powerful women. Angry women. Inconvenient women. Bad girls. Gay men. Queers. Mentally ill. Outcasts. And our little queer coven is a group of rule breakers among the outcasts.

It's also interesting that despite looking like the characters have stereotypical traits, at their core, at their full potential as a witch, they're the complete opposite.

Jen while bound is selling pseudo science and has hurt her clients. Jen at her best is knowledgeable to the point that witches around her don't understand the terms she uses and since her trial she was able to heal people. Alice is angry and a loner but her anger isn't shown through aggression, but through grief and depression. In both cases losing belief in themselves was what stopping them from reaching their full potential.

The belief that Jen's expertise comes from her knowledge and no one can take it from her was what saved her. Alice was saved because she finally saw that it wasn't her fault that she carried a generational burden. She shared her grief, opened up to her coven and learned that all the while she was loved and protected. That she wasn't a disappointment but a sure and certain hope to finally break the curse.

Lilia while living through the most stereotypical picture of a fortune teller or a psychic, is the one who's the most annoyed with the misconceptions. I imagine her trial must have sth to do with the stereotypical evil witch of stories.

Agatha on the outside is the picture of that stereotypical witch Lilia hates so much. She can be cunning and ruthless and obsessed with power. The rumors say she even sacrificed her own child for power. Yet that is her biggest fear and regret. Yet she becomes the most observant or caring of the group when they're in danger or distress. They way she cares about Teen and is protective of him. When she makes Jen believe in herself. And reminds Alice that all this time she's been loved and protected and capable. Agatha keeps pretending she doesn't care. But as the story goes and the bonds with her coven strengthen it's become harder and harder for her to keep pretense. It would be interesting if she doesn't get a specific trial, but her trial would be her journey through the road.

[lizhly-writes]

staring at my sqh/yqy peak lord fiance ficlet. consider this! sqh is still consorting with demons while this happens because why not. mobei-jun still exists and is fully aware of the whole "haha i'm engaged to my shixiong and everything is so fucking weird" and sqh is muttering about this as he looks through some northern desert stuff.

it's just. come on, yue-shixiong. we're engaged, you don't have to keep chasing after your xiao jiu -- not that sqh minds!!! if you two get along, great, that's everything that great airplane god wanted! but like, it gets really awkward when you run away while you're on a date with lil ole shang qinghua, and then everyone starts feeling very sorry for sqh for having a fiance so obviously in love with another man, which, okay, sqh absolutely took advantage of to get paperwork done at first, but it's starting to get wayyyyy more awkward now --

mbj finds himself in the wonderful position of being able to give sqh dating advice. does mbj date? no. but does he know what dating looks like? hell yeah. it seems a shame that his best spy/advisor/friend(?) doesn't know the answer to this.

"hit him," mbj suggests.

"what," sqh says.

"three times a day."

and then we get into a discussion on demon courting and sqh going "haha that's nice but yqy isn't a demon" and mbj is like "i don't understand why you don't try it, how else are you going to get his attention".

"humans don't court by punching people???"

"you don't appear to be making any progress doing this the human way." and mbj says this super condescendingly, too. like hey, sqh, you're such a loser. you have no game. of course you have no bitches. how can you have bitches if you don't punch people in the face.

well, yeah?? fuck you too, my king! it's not like you've ever had a date, are you not launching a boulder while being precariously balanced on your glass peak (me: i'm paraphrasing bu-ding-talk, check them out)? sqh could totally make progress if he wants to! not that he wants to! who wants to make progress with yqy??

anyway, this gets buried until the next time yqy pays sqq too much attention and sqh had the most resigned fucking look on his face. like come on. this again?

lqg is there. sqh makes incredibly awkward small talk. like haha hey how's your engagement to sqq. good? bad? ahahaha yeah, actually, sqh didn't have to ask, obviously it's bad. look, our fiances are running away with each other. people keep telling sqh that he needs to keep yue-shixiong's attention somehow, but all the advice is weird. in fact this guy last week said that sqh should hit yqy three times a day, not that sqh is going to try that --

"hmm," says lqg. "that's not a bad idea."

sqh is abruptly reminded that he is talking to lqg, a man who probably would be more interested in people if they punched him in the face.

"is that what you're doing with sqq???" says sqh.

the answer is no, of course not, don't be dumb. but like, if sqq WASN'T a poisonous snake of a man and a decent human being, lqg would mayhaps have his interest piqued with a good fight. that's so much better than flowers and haircombs. who wants courting gifts when you can have a good punch in the face.

"hahaha thanks liu-shidi but maybe not i think yue-shixiong could probably kill me if i tried," says sqh and scurries away.

fast-forward a week or two, in which sqh is having a stressful time. maybe it's tax season. maybe it's a shitty night hunt that he has no business being on. either way, yqy is there with him and good god is yqy zoned out.

is yqy actually zoned out? eh, maybe not. perhaps he is actually fully paying attention, but also he takes a look at a stand for fans while sqh is talking to him and sqh is like "shit, is this sqq again?" exasperation turning into anger while sqh is just, super stressed, and he just needs yqy to pay attention to him just this once, and the thought occurs -- well, at least two separate people have told him that he just needs to hit yqy --

all this to say that sqh just fucking decks yqy

[moociaoafterdark]

Evil Witch Emperor of Mankind: Son, your ass will keep growing until you take your place on the Golden Throne.

Magnus the Scarlet Gyatt King:

[lemonlamblaura]

Kallamar: *giving a sermon*

Child follower: Mommy, how come mister Kallamar has two nails cut and not the others?

Literally everyone:

Kallamar:

Everyone:

Lilybell:..................... finger painting? 😅

[mpsansy]

The ghostly trio hide their competence by being utter morons. Not wanting you to trust them with ANYTHING.

Much rather be hated. Because it's only then that you got no one to please. It's all so simple, you see.

Oh! And being feared is pretty good too

[sunlightnmoonshine]

I actually really applaud hyunwoo for telling haein when he did. It was very off putting that they were going to make her go ahead with the surgery without giving her this information and the way the episode repeatedly highlighted how conflicted hyunwoo was about it made me know he was going to tell her and it's the reason why he tells her that gets to me. He just didn't want her to go ahead without this information even knowing that she was not going to respond well and this is once again how hyunwoo has always been on her side because he knew she would have wanted to know and he wanted to give her that agency.

But you know what gets me more is that he still comes in, in the end and says I know you don't want this but live that's the most important thing right now, I'm telling you this because you should know but don't walk away just live, choose to live, just please listen to me.

And i know the next ep is going to be exhausting because haein has a lot to unpack, and she's going to have to make a choice (unless the clown gets in the way and causes an even worse situation where there is no room for choosing).

[janesurlife]

I am damm sure he'll play again so it's not a tribute post but I just wanted to collect some thoughts. After watching today's match I think I'm slowly coming to terms with his retirement. I saw him losing points I KNOW he would have never lost a few years back... I get it now. His fighting spirit is still there yes but the body is holding him back. All his career he fought not only against the opponents but his own body, to win so I think it's time he takes some rest. He deserves it more than anyone 🙂

[nezu3kun]

I dream a dirty dream of you, baby You're crawling on the bathroom floor

[ad-astra-per-aspera-1389]

Hawkmoth would fucking HATE Spider-Man, could you imagine? I mean, he fits all the criteria to be a miraculous holder...but minus the miraculous. Skintight, animal/bug themed suit? Named after an animal/bug? Mask? One Power + durability? Hawkmoth is out here wondering WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS KID'S MIRACULOUS, DAMMIT...

He's everything Hawkmoth despises about both Chat Noir and Ladybug combined: puns, red suit, resourceful, efficient (more or less) etc etc etc.

But he doesn't have to transform back and forth to use his power again, actually making him more efficient.

Plus, I feel like Ladybug and Chat Noir are less unsettling. Aww, spots! Cat ears! A TAIL OMG. Then you get to spidey...⚪️⚪️ them fuckin eyes...

I got off track, but besides a lack of miraculous to steal, I feel like Spidey would be quick to track down + expose Hawkmoth for his crimes, landing him in jail without hesitation.

[strawblemon]

Teen shows all belong on a sexual-realism spectrum. On one side of the spectrum, you have something like Euphoria or Elite, TV shows that are just softcore porn set in high school. On the other side, you have Heartstopper, a show in which teenagers love to passionately kiss and never once think about doing anything more. In the middle of the spectrum, you have Sex Education, a show in which every teenager is horny but they're also all extremely awkward and clueless about what that means.