#i don't know when to shut up

[reiderwriter]

Me: haha this request is so cute, I should be able to get it written quickly because I like it a lot

Also me, five hours and 3.5k words later: Finally the introduction is complete.

[taleswritten]

I simply cannot help but to write novella replies.

[november-rising]

Further Thoughts: Omelette

This man, to me, sees himself as a means to an end. Now, may that be a tool for others’ to utilize him or Carmy himself trying to live his life, I don’t know. But, I do know that this man doesn’t always know how to accept that he’s worth so very much.

Carmen’s drive is admirable. He knows what he can do, who he can be, and how to get there. I would badger this man to the ends of the Earth to gain all his culinary secrets. And, when I finally found him, he would teach me everything. In less than a heartbeat.

Carmen is a giver. He likes to take care of people. There have been many scenes were he's allowed everyone space to find their way while gently encouraging them. It is beautiful to see. He’s not showy about it. Yet we see it in the words of support, the guidance, or the resources provided to others that have skill but don’t have the foundation just yet.

There’s so many thoughts swirling around about Carmen from his utter courage and strength to his willingness to nurture/mentor a talented chef to him trusting explicitly and implicitly in his team…so many thoughts – Carmen is a good person who takes on all the pressure and is quick to put himself on the back burner. It’s why I wrote “He knows he will. He always does.” I don't think he will fuck up in the end. He's just waiting until he does.

And through all this anxiety, he does find beauty and meaning in cooking. Working in the culinary field may not be fun for him for some time as he said with Ritchie down in the random basement (The OG had a basement all this time and we've seen it but once!). Yet, I think he's finding the joy he once had when he's with Sydney.

Their energy is symbiotic...similarly-minded and enjoyed. I can't think of the exact post but I saw where someone showed gifs of Carmen smiling and laughing when he's with Sydney alone together. There's so much between the two.

Sydney is a catalyst. What she brings and offers speaks to Carmen. I haven't quite figured out how to express my experience (read as joy and probable transference) of Sydney over these past two seasons. She has her traumas and MH issues (potentially the acid reflux/GERD she's been experiencing is a physical symptom/outcome). And there's something about Sydney that I haven't been able to put my finger on. Maybe I'm not ready to see all of her just yet.

Gotta love this damn show!

[unpairedbracket]

So it looks like @yoshihashismattebum, @thepenultimaterolo, and @thewaythroughthewoods have stood in front of a mirror and said my URL three times, compelling me to break my vow of silence and produce one (1) "post" on this "blog". My task is to spell out my URL with song titles

TL:DR - here's a playlist

Side A (don't worry about it)

Unacceptable - Bad Religion

Never Fight a Man With a Perm - IDLES

Paralytic States - Against Me!

Aneurysm - Nirvana (1)

I checked your cellphone - Otoboke Beaver (2)

Rollercoaster - Lauran Hibberd

Extraordinary Girl/Letterbomb - Green Day (3)

Dragon - King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard (4)

ballad of a homeschooled girl - Olivia Rodrigo (5)

Red Wine Supernova - Chappell Roan (6)

Art of Dying, The - Gojira (7)

Crying in Amsterdam - Sløtface

Knights of Cydonia - Muse (8)

Edmonton - PUP (9)

These Spectacles Reveal the Nostalgics - The Hives

Liner Notes

There seem to be two studio versions and lots of live versions of this; the one I'm thinking of is the studio version that was the B-side to Smells Like Teen Spirit, but the live versions I've heard are also good. Not so keen on the Incesticide version though

Or in Japanese, 携帯みてしまいました by おとぼけビ～バ～

Extraordinary Girl is, imo, one of the weaker tracks on American Idiot, but Letterbomb is probably my favourite (sub-9-minute) song on that album so I figured I'd take advantage of the weird way the track listing is arranged to sneak an L in here

King Gizz are bonkers good but a lot of their music isn't really my jam, genre-wise. This is one occasion where they made an album in a genre I like, and the results are excellent. 16th note double kick drumming at 145bpm for 40+ bars straight? Nice. Vocals in four different octaves? Of course. Two verses of chanting in Latin? Why not?

I'm not the only person I know who's mistaken the intro to this for a PUP intro. I don't think there's any other pop star I can say that of.

Yeah this is a repeat from the lists of two of the people who nominated me for this. Well-deserved.

If I said 3 songs back that King Gizzard's drumming was impressive, Mario Duplantier's is inhuman. I've seen a 10-minute video essay about what polyrhythm he's even drumming in the intro, and the kick drumming on the chorus is like 40% faster than on Dragon. Wild stuff.

I feel like Muse work best in the "horseshoe theory" region of a scale from sublime to ridiculous, and this song is a good example

This is from one of the two EPs that soundtracked a locked-down 2021 for me - very cathartic, and much-needed at the time

Side B (A.K.A you should have worried about it)

Ur Mum - Wet Leg

New Born - Muse

Passport - Sløtface

Alone at Home - Jonathan Coulton

Ignoreland - REM

Reject - Green Day

Everlong - Foo Fighters

D-7 - Nirvana (1)

Bulls on Parade - Rage Against the Machine/Denzel Curry (2)

Red Light - The Regrettes

A.K.A. I-D-I-O-T - The Hives

Coast, The - PUP (3)

Kyoto Now! - Bad Religion (4)

EAT - Poppy (5)

Toxicity - System of a Down (6)

Liner Notes

It's a cover of a song by The Wipers (you didn't think I was going to choose a normal Nirvana song, did you?) As far as I can tell Nirvana never released a studio recording, so I'm treating the version recorded live at the BBC as my canonical version

Couldn't choose between the original version and Denzel Curry's cover here. I'd highly recommend seeking out Denzel's version if you've not heard it before, so that's the version I've put on the playlist. The youtube video is still worth watching as well though.

The vibes of this song are brilliantly creepy. Final few lines give me chills every time. Apparently it's based on an old Inuit story the singer's parents terrified him with as a child, which is cool!

This is a brilliant climate protest song. Actually, the Bad Religion song on Side A is also an environmental protest song, released 12 years earlier. Nothing changes, does it?

This is the title track from the other EP that soundtracked my 2021. I think it's the first time I remember hearing Poppy going fully into metalcore screaming and I love it

This is maybe a bit of a basic pick for a SOaD song? I nearly went for Tentative instead because Mezmerize/Hypnotize were my first of their albums as a teenager; but decided that I do actually think Toxicity is the better song

I've been lucky enough to see some of the artists on my list perform live - those artists are bolded in the listings. Sløtface are a special case - I had tickets to a show in March 2020, which didn't happen because they couldn't leave Norway and I couldn't leave my house. I've got tickets to see them later this year though, which is exciting!

As you can no doubt tell, I had a hard time fitting in everything I wanted to include - I ended up with a list of about 20 artists I wanted songs by, and only 15 letters in my URL.

I ended up with shortlists of 5+ songs starting with different relevant letters for some artists, so it took quite some shuffling to arrange everything in a way I was happy with. I even asked my combinatorialist friend if he could identify what sort of combinatorial optimisation problem I had on my hands (either a knapsack problem variant with a weird objective function, or maybe some kind of covering problem), but that didn't go anywhere so I ended up brute-forcing it.

Artist's impression of me brute-forcing it.

In the end I had two songs for some letters that I was unwilling to cut, so double list was the only thing for it. Struggled in the other direction with some of the repeated letters, but managed to get there in the end. Managed no artist repeats within a list and the only one repeated album across the whole thing. I'd consider all of these recommendations to also be album recommendations (apart from the few that aren't from an album)

My actual workings

You may notice if you are weird and look closely that a couple of songs here differ from what I've finished up with - there was flux going on right up until I actually wrote up this post!

Uhhhh everyone I know on here tagged me in the first place so... if you wanna do another one go for it I guess?

[brydde]

* ✉ [ @4ger ] asked : ❛❛ if bry.de was a video game final boss, how would the battle unfold? consider things like mechanics, the music, the setting, the stage, potentially the story etc. is he one of those fuckers who get a second stage when you think you've already beaten him once? ❜❜

The game has started with Bry.de pulling you out from the dark, and it will end with you condemning him into this dark. (Pull his plug, watch him go out like a light bulb.) He has been a friend, a teacher, but now he's the thing standing between you and the world as it was, as it has always been. An uncomplicated reality with rules. A realm where all your loved ones live, but you don't belong. Awake. Asleep. Real. Not real.

Your character wakes up in a dream in a forest high up in the sky. Bry.de is there, waiting in a clearing. There's no need to say anything. He knows what you have come here to do. An oppressive soundtrack begins to play.

You call for your trusted weapon, Nightmare. In an instant, a flaming sword materializes in your hands. Instead of calling for his own blade to meet yours with, Bry.de looks at the sky and wishes for rain. And rain it falls, dousing the flames on your sword, rendering the fire damage null. The game prompts you to approach. You have no other choice.

You fall upon him with Nightmare. The QTEs are tough. You fail most of them. (You are meant to fail them. It's a deliberate game design.) Bry.de easily sidesteps your every attack. When he does retaliate, it's only to push you back. You barely take damage from it, but it gets frustrating after a while. His voice is full of pity when he pleads for you to stop. Your character hurls swears at him, angry that he's in control even now.

You realize the only way to make him take damage is to weaken him first. Change the arena to your advantage. You know his weakness. Why not use it to douse his flames like he had yours? You close your eyes and dream of a city. High-rise buildings rise from the ground around you two, tearing the trees from the earth by the roots. The ground shakes, and so does your controller. The buildings groan as they shoot up towards the sky. Above the groaning buildings, aeroplanes soar through ominous grey clouds with engines louder than thunder. Trains and cars appear around you only to crash into each other, polluting the air with toxic fumes and creating more sound. Every loud noise comes together to create an ear-bleeding cacophony that seems only to affect Bry.de. You and Bry.de fight for dominance of the dream. Black, oily liquid flows from his eyes, nose, and ears. He's covering the city in it. You stand ankle-deep in this mysterious black blood. He looks like he's screaming in pain, but no sound comes out of his mouth. You win, you think, when Bry.de falls to his knees, hands covering his ears.

The game gives you two choices. You can cut Bry.de's connection to the Dreaming, or you can eradicate the Dreaming entirely. Cutting him from the Dreaming means sending him into a dreamless sleep, never to wake. Tens of thousands of dreamers will follow him, eventually. They will live for a while, but it will be a slow death for every single one of them. Bry.de has a plan to save them all. Forever. If you let him go, he could save them all. But his plan involves breaking the world as you know it. You're not sure what "breaking the world" entails. Will it save tens of thousands only to doom billions? Bry.de is sure it won't, but he is just a man (despite you looking at him like a god).

Destroying the Dreaming means destroying all things beautiful and dreamt. It means no more dreams for you. No more dreams for the dreamers. But it also means no more nightmares. No monsters to bring back to hurt your loved ones. It will be a quick death. You'll just go to sleep; every dreamer and dreams will go to sleep, but it means you'll have made the world safer for the non-dreamers.

So, death either way. You could have a chance of a good life if you let him win, but the game doesn't give you that option. You have no other choice.

Whatever you end up choosing doesn't matter. It ends the same. Bry.de grabs your blade when you approach him. He looks you in the eyes, more aware than you realize and strong still. You realize he hasn't lost this fight. This is him surrendering out of his own free will. He's tired. He's so, so, so damn tired of fighting. He loves you. If you want this, he'll let you have it. You have chosen wrong, but he doesn't hate you for it. Time is a spiral. He will come back again. Maybe you two will be friends again. Maybe you both can change the world forever together next time. He guides Nightmare into his heart. It cuts not only his flesh (dreaming and waking), but also his connection to the Dreaming. He has made the choice for you.

His head falls forward. In the dream and in the waking world, Bry.de takes his last breath. Your controller shudders in your hands as he takes his last breath. The controller's light changes from red to white.

The world is still open for you to explore after this seeming victory. There are quests to complete, people to save. You still have your other companions, but it feels as though you are walking the world alone. He's not there to ask about a relic you found. He's not there when you need him to do his magic. You feel Bry.de's absence in everything.

[solroskajan]

Thank you murder drones for reminding me that I still like the same things as I did when I was 13

[bubbarnes]

“... is that Bucky?”

[14dayswithyou]

💖 Day 3.5 is now available! 💖

For the last couple of months, only Server Boosters had access to the 3.5 update... Buuuuut now it's available for everyone to play in the 14DWY Discord — and soon itch.io once I'm happy with the QA and state of the game — so please don't feel pressured to join unless you want to!!

The full devlog + even more screenshots are under the cut ^^

What's been added to the 3.5 version?

📺 Streamer Mode!

I've been told that it's difficult to stream and monetise age-restricted videos on YouTube and Twitch, so I added an option to remove the sexual content and strong language used in the demo.

Now y'all can invite Ren into your bed for cuddles without putting your streamer career on the line /silly /lh

This won't affect the 18+ rating or dark themes/elements of the game, however! Although Streamer Mode will prevent you from seeing any "gruesome" CGs in the future, most of the core elements of the game will still be tied to the choices and decisions you make. So you won't miss out on the overall experience by using streamer mode!!

⚙️ Custom Pronouns!

It only took me one entire year to get around to it, but you can finally choose your own preferred pronouns (or use a set of pronouns instead)... At the cost of being able to change them mid-game ^^;

Since the original pronoun screen wouldn't update until a new scene was displayed, I temporarily disabled the feature. But once I find a workaround, I'll bring it back!

💗 Choose how others perceive you!

You can now choose how the cast and narration perceive you! Originally, the narration was kept strictly gender-neutral (outside of pronouns and genitalia picked by the player), but this will soon change in future updates.

For more clarity: you don't get to choose the words specifically, but you can choose between masculine, feminine, and androgynous terms!

📋 Separate top and bottom genitalia!

You can now choose your tatas and pps separately! >:3

Alongside that, you can also choose your preferred body type!

I removed the "both" genitalia option because a few players still assumed it was an obscure version of "intersex". That wasn't my intention and I don't want to mislead anyone, so I took it out for now ^^;

I also didn't want to include a screenshot of the new genitalia choices in action (because it's NSFW), so y'all get the same character menu screen for the nth time instead lmao

📱 Relationship Screen Overhaul!

You can now change your own status for more immersion, and long-term Server Boosters will eventually be able to submit and use their own icon within the game as well!

Stalking finding your friends has now become easier by using "Buddy Maps"; a new app that allows you to see the location of all the cast members!

I want to offer players more incentive to check the relationship screen since they tend to miss the status updates, so hopefully this might help ;v;

It also says it "updates every few hours" so folks don't go overboard and check every 5 seconds to see where Ren is gdsghf (also keep in mind that he's a hacker lol)

🖤 Additional Scenes Update!

Day 2 received a brand new CG!!!!! Originally, I planned on only adding a few CGs sporadically throughout the game, but it didn't feel right to leave Day 2 so... empty... so I added a brand new CG to (hopefully) make things feel more balanced and natural!

If you decline Teo's offer on Day 3, Leon will now call and try to convince you to reconsider. However, players are still allowed to decline, and if they do, they'll reach a dead end.

After listening to feedback on itch, I changed some of the dialogue during Days 1-3 to make it seem more consistent! They're only small changes though, so it's honestly not worth looking for sdgjssga

🎶 Updated BGM and SFX!

I wanted to try out a different style of music to see if it fits the vibe of 14DWY more! The BGM features more acoustics to suit the "beachy" theme of Corland Bay, though I made a conscious effort to include piano elements as well to stay true to the original!!

I figured it'd be better to give players a live example before I make a poll (to see if they prefer the change or not) and publish it to Itch.

Some new SFX have also been added, though it's very minimal and honestly not that noticeable.

How to download and play the update?

(warning: clicking on the following links will open Discord!!) To download the Day 3.5 update, simply join the 14DWY Discord server, verify your age, and visit the "14dwy-updates" channel!

Alternatively, you can also wait until the update is publicly released on Itch to play it as well!! (It normally gets released shortly after a round of QA testing/getting feedback from the server, though I may release it earlier if I feel like it hehe ^^)

Enjoy!!

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

Constantly citing this article and the studies it uses.

Here's a quote:

"That study shows that transmasculine individuals were actually more likely to be victims of childhood sexual assault, adult sexual assault, dating violence, domestic violence, and stalking than were transfeminine individuals (as shown in the chart below).

The only category in which trans women were more likely to be victimized was by hate violence, and even there the difference was small: 30 percent of trans women reported having experienced hate violence, compared to 29 percent of trans men."

[ryuzumisama]

Alfira and Lakrissa - a short respite along the journey

[transvampireboyfriend]

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

"I'm just saying, if the heat bothers you so much, you could cut your hair" Nancy points out, after declining Eddie's pleas for her spare scrunchie.

Robin sits on Nancy's lap, clutching the back of Steve's seat and she looks at Steve through the side mirror like she's afraid that he's about to go on a mission to defend Eddie's honor or something but Steve rolls his eyes at her. He's not that gone.

Or at least he knows how to hide it well.

Eddie's lost several of Nancy's favorite hair accessories and two weeks ago she bowed to never lend him any ever again.

Which, does not stop Eddie from asking her anyway at least once a day.

But the point is, even if Steve wanted to, Eddie's honor cannot be defended in this situation.

Nancy's leaning behind Argyle's back now to glare at the metalhead. Steve can see them in the rearview mirror.

Eddie gasps "I would never" he says, clutching his chest dramatically.

Steve secretly breathes a sigh of relief.

Johnathan chuckles at the wheel. "But you could" he comments, eyes on the road.

Steve can see Argyle subtly laughing and shaking his head out of the corner of his eye.

Today is a rare occasion, Jonathan is driving them in Steve's car.

The goal of Steve's rant earlier about having to drive them everywhere was to get Eddie to drive them, so Steve could sit shotgun and watch Eddie drive.

Instead, Jonathan had offered first and then Steve couldn't go in the backseat because he's in charge of their map.

But whatever, this is fine too. He trusts Jonathan and it is nice to get a break and to be able to fully turn around when he's talking to someone in the backseat.

"Jon, I would lose all my sex appeal, you don't get it" Eddie answers, getting a box of Twinkies from one of the many bags they packed and placed on the floor of Steve's car.

"I get it" Argyle chimes in, watching Eddie pull out a Twinkie and shaking his head no when Eddie offers him one.

"You'd still be sexy with short hair" Robin comments from her seat on Nancy's lap.

Everyone turns to look at her.

"What?" she shrugs "I can say that"

Nancy chuckles into her shoulder.

Steve opens their map again to stop thinking about Eddie's 'sex appeal', even as the guy is excitedly munching on a Twinkie in the backseat of Steve's car.

He's got cream in the corner of his mouth and he clearly put more in his mouth than he can comfortably chew. He's leaning one elbow on Argyle's shoulder, his hand holding half a Twinkie, his other hand holds his mop of hair up in a high bun, causing his cut off tank to sit barely covering his nipples, his tattoos on display and his armpit hair fully visible.

Steve's fairly certain nobody else in this car would get it, but to him the sight is mouth watering. The guy is practically irresistible.

"I don't think i would've gone on even half the dates I've gone on if i didn't have my hair" Steve muses, for something to say and to add to Eddie's point, even though he agrees with Robin.

Almost everyone answers with agreeable noises, except Eddie and Robin.

Robin snorts and says "You are relentless"

While Eddie says "You don't get dates for your hair" at the same time. In a tone that suggests he thinks this is an obvious thing.

"I mean- it doesn't hurt" provides Nancy, she sends Steve an apologetic look but Steve waves her off. It's a compliment as far as he's concerned, he loves his hair.

Eddie finishes his treat and opens a new one while everyone else gives their opinions.

"For a lot of people, hair is a big part of attraction" Jonathan is saying, trying to seem like he's not speaking from experience.

"Especially hair as luscious as Steve's" Argyle agrees, leaning forward to lightly comb the side of Steve's hair, making him laugh.

"Thanks, man" Steve says overlapping Eddie's response.

"And I agree!" he exclaims "I'm saying he doesn't get dates because of his hair." Eddie goes on, waving his new Twinkie around for emphasis. "People throw themselves at Steve, and always will, but it's not because of his hair" he repeats.

Steve feels his cheeks heat up but still asks "Then why?"

"Well, because you're very pretty!" Eddie answers easily, like everyone should already know this.

Steve keeps his eyes carefully trained on the map, like he needs to study it meticulously, right this moment, while they're in the middle of a highway.

His cheeks are burning up and he can feel it spreading to his ears.

"And that's if they don't know you!" Eddie continues "If they do know you they know you're kind and brave and strong ...and generous and funny. Who wouldn't want all that in a date?" Eddie finshes.

Oh I don't know, you? Maybe? Do you? Steve thinks.

"Even bald, people would still go crazy for you" Eddie adds, his words slightly muffled towards the end as he shoves almost all of the new Twinkie in his mouth but apparently thinks better of it, biting all but a small piece.

"Here. You want the rest of this?" Eddie offers Steve, talking through his mouthful, and presenting the small piece with his ringed fingers, right in front of Steve's face.

Without thinking, Steve leans forward and takes it with his mouth, his lips burning where they touched Eddie's fingers.

As Eddie retrieves his hand Steve realizes what he just did and how quiet the car got.

He sends Robin a panicked look through the side mirror as Jonathan awkwardly clears his throat.

"Argyle's got nice hair" Robin tries.

The car immediately fills up with enthusiastic agreement and Steve slowly breathes out.

He can't bring himself to look at Eddie as he chews on his bite. He practically licked Eddie's fingers. Unprompted! The guy probably meant for Steve to grab the treat and then eat it. If he even accepted it at all!

Steve feels like an idiot and he frowns at the map again, willing himself to ignore the goosebumps in his arms and the tickling on his lips.

He doesn't see Eddie worriedly staring at him for the remaining of their conversation, until Nancy takes pity on him and offers up her spare scrunchie to distract him.

part 2

[aro-aizawa]

i like to think everyone has a colour associated with them, whether its just your fave colour or what you generally wear most of or what colour your bedroom walls are. i always associate the name sophie with dark blue, my mum is always a nice turquoise, i like to think my colour is a bright sunflower yellow.

if you have a specific shade pls tell me i adore when ppl have associated colours and tell me them, bc i think of them when i see that colour

[i-dreamed-i-had-a-son]

jon val jon or something

[mamawasatesttube]

this might be mean but. it really ticks me off when people respond to authors and artists wishing for actual community and engagement with their works by saying "oh but you see im just so anxious i cannot offer you any kind words." with the optional "but do please keep making things for me anyway!" because like...

a) do you understand how anxiety-inducing it can be to pour a little piece of your soul into a work of art and share it publicly? i feel like you don't see the people creating these things as people like you and that is an issue. we are people who just really love a thing and want to talk about it with other people who also love that thing.

but moreover, and this is the part that might be mean, b) damn why doesn't your anxiety prevent you from making excuses to us then? i wish it did! like if you're SO anxious about a fic author blocking you for saying something nice, why are you not anxious about getting blocked for telling that author "okay but i don't want to comment on your works though"??? because i can tell you which of these two things is way more likely to piss me off and it isn't the comment.

like. idk man. if you really don't want to comment on and engage with people's creative works, no one can force you to. but also consider maybe not commenting on and engaging with those people's posts just to explain that you don't want to comment on/engage with their works. if you are so committed to staying quiet and being a passive consumer then commit to the bit and stop asking creative people who put way more of themselves out there than you are to pat you on the back and reassure you that you'll still keep getting free content even if you can't do so much as drop a "this was really good!" in the comments.

[ray935sworld]

I hope Logan stole a plant and a bunch of pencils on his way out the Williams HQ

[anxietycheesecake]

Honestly, don't give me nandermo if you don't feel like it (weird, given everything that has happened since season 3, but ok), but the only other possible ending is Nandor learning to be on his own and realizing romantic love won't fix all his problems and... idk, finding his own purpose beyond other people. Like, it'd make sense for him to end up with Guillermo; anyone else would be forced and detrimental for his character arc.

Also having the male character whose relationship with another man has been teased for years ending up with the only single woman in the cast after going "haha, let two guys be friends uwu" in every interview feels homophobic af.

"Bisexual people don't owe you being in a-" BECKY, I'M BISEXUAL, I ONLY DATED SOMEONE OF MY OWN GENDER ONCE WHEN I WAS 15 AND IT LASTED LIKE A MONTH, I KNOW HOW REAL LIFE WORKS, THIS IS A TV SHOW WRITTEN BY A DUDE WHO CRINGES AT THE IDEA OF US EVEN WANTING A QUEER RELATIONSHIP, GET OVER YOURSELF

And the Guide deserves so much better than them throwing her into a relationship that came out of nowhere just so a loser who can't be alone doesn't have to learn how to be alone wtf