#i don't know how the fuck these writers expect me to like him; much less by relentlessly riding his dck

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

oh hey, forgot about nine celebrating that five wanted to die, tried to kill himself in front of him, and almost succeeded 🙃🙃🙃🙃

[rabbitsrants]

What do you think of D.C.'s M26, do you think it was just a fire of pairs for us Shinran?

SPOILERS FOR MOVIE 26

i think, in total there are two significant shinran moments worth talking about

i enjoy certain elements of the first scene:

ran impulsively goes after a member of the black organization and puts herself in danger because he poses a threat to haibara. their fight is AMAZING, i love how ran dominates pinga despite him attacking her with a knife

something similar happens in the manga as well (chapter 434), so the writing for ran absolutely tracks here

chianti sees the fight and interferes by attempting to shoot ran - shinichi barely manages to save her in time

here's the thing: i absolutely hate the writers for often reducing ran to a damsel in distress in these movies, that's an issue i'll further analyze in a bit

with that being said, i don't mind shinichi saving ran in this scene. it's an impactful shinran moment, cause so far the writing is similar to the manga

the only difference between chapter 434 and this movie is the fact that shinichi actually sees what's happening and is able to actively protect ran. i don't have a problem with that, because that's what shinichi and ran do - they protect each other.

what i love even more is how shinichi decidedly urges ran to stay put, i think that's also very in character for him:

he wants ran nowhere near the black organization, for very specific reasons that i'll get into another post

so far, this is a well executed scene, right? it's a very realistic, high-stakes moment that we'd expect from the manga. so far, so good, right? RIGHT?!

no. cause this is where the movie writers fuck up:

W H A T

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! SHE ACTUALLY STAYS?! AND WHEN SHIN TELLS HER TO RUN, SHE RUNS?! WHAT?!

this is is supposed be ran??? no fucking way.

my girl is the definition of reckless and stubborn. she's not just the type of person who'll enter a burning house to save a girl she barely knows (chapter 174), she's also the type of person who refuses to waste a single second when human lives are at stake. no matter how much shinichi begs her to stay away.

chapter 640

and she does this in chapter 822 on the mystery train as well: shinichi yells at the detective boys, sonoko and ran, he tells them not to leave their room, no matter what. and ran repeatedly attempts to go against his instructions because she's worried about haibara, despite receiving a text message that she's okay, btw. ran's intuition tells her that something is wrong with haibara, so she's gonna fucking look for haibara!!!

i need the movie writers to understand that my girl is absolutely unhinged. she cares about other people very deeply, to the point where she's incapable of watching from the sidelines as they potentially get hurt

so how would i have written this moment? what would've been a more realistic version of this scene?

shinichi and ran get into an intense fight: shin desperately urges ran to stay put, she refuses to listen. and then there'd be two possible outcomes:

a) ran continues to go after pinga and dies in the process (remember, ran was fully prepared to die for haibara in chapter 434)

b) shinichi realizes that he can't stop ran and offers her a safer way to help. ran accepts and they work together as a team to get haibara back

why didn't the movie writers go for this approach? my theory: they don't want ran to take a bigger role in these movies, so option b) was a no-go for them. obviously it'd make even less sense for them to kill off ran, but like i already explained, there's no way ran would just give up on haibara in that moment

so why include this moment at all? what's the point of starting such a strong scene if you're not gonna progress the plot?

the point is ran being a damsel in distress.

which brings me to the second shinran moment in this movie:

ran goes after pinga again and he kicks her off the balcony, she's about to fall and get hurt

kuroda ends up saving her and shinichi feels inadequate

..............

AGAIN, THERE'S NO PLOT PROGRESSION, THE ONLY POINT OF THIS SCENE IS TO MAKE HER LOOK WEAK

idk who this woman is but this ain't ran

HERE'S RAN FUCKING MOURI FOR Y'ALL

a woman who's consistently depicted as strong, fierce and very capable of protecting herself:

chapter 43

chapter 169

and that's not to say that shinichi doesn't worry about her sometimes, ofc he does:

chapter 493

but that doesn't take away from the fact that she's a fucking badass who can defend herself

and it's not just that she's capable of protecting herself, she protects shinichi too.

chapter 5

..........

it's like the movie writers read the manga, took note of moments where shinichi comes through for ran but completely forgot that it's mutual, they come through for each other:

chapter 389

chapter 1050

the movie staff doesn't get ran, they seem to have no idea how strong or caring she is and i hate how much it's hurting the fandom's perception of her

in conclusion:

visit the shinran library for more

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

HOLY FUCKING SHIT HAZBIN WAS SO FUCKING GOOD IM GOING INSANE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKENFKCMKWJRKFNSMSMDMSMDN-

Okay. Okay deep breaths. Time for some cool and collected comentary. Okay.

Putting it under the cut so ppl can avoid spoilers :)

HUSK USED TO BE AN OVERLORD!?!?!?!?!? HELLO!?!?!?!?!? FUCKIN PLOTTWIST OF THE CENTURY WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?

Huskerdust my beloved

SIR PENTIOUS MY BELOVED

Vox was great. I love him he's so fucking cool-

If Vox wasn't already a Tumblr sexyman he's definitely gonna be one now. He's so fucking Onceler coded it's insane.

Velvette was amazing too. It's so funny that she's British lmao I was not expecting that

Velvette is also very Anne Boelyne(like from SIX not from Real Life) coded it's wild. Her part in that song with Carmila was giving so much Don't Lose Your Head

I swear I'll stop comparing them to other characters I SWEAR

Okay but me and my brother are working on a Hazbin Hotel swap AU where we swap the main cast with the overlords and in that AU we swapped Husk and Vox. The Husk used to be an overlord reveal is gonna make that AU soooooo much easier lmao

ADAM IS REALLY GOOD I promised I would stop comparing to other characters but he was giving SO MUCH Hades from Disney's Hercules like its insane

I think we should let Alex Brightman sing rocj and roll more often that song was such a fucking BANGER

SPEAKING OF THE SONGS- oh my god I love the soundtrack so fucking much-

Stayed Gone was a lil less hype then I was expecting but thats okay cuz it was still a banger and I loved the visuals

That song battle between Carmilla and Velvette????? Oh my god??????

Carmilla and Vaggie's song was also amazing but I think I know why they didn't have Stephanie Beatriz sing her own song in Elena of Avalor y'know, girl cannot hold a character voice while singing

LOSER WAS SO FUCKING GOOD- I love Huskerdust so much. I love Keith David so much. Blake Roman is such a phenomenal Angel Dust.

SPEAKING OF all the voice actors are amazing. Blake Roman, Brightman as Pentious and Joel Perez were the ones I was the most worried abt but I loved all their preformances so much it was fucking fantastic

Valentino can go die in a fucking hole <3

The other Vees are cool and fun to watch but I hope Valentino fucking dies

Okay to be fair he's also fun to watch when he's not in the same room as Angel Dust but tHAT DOESNT SUPERSEID MY HATRED FUCK 👏 THAT 👏 GUY 👏👏👏👏

Speaking of the Vees tho I do love their dynamic

My favorite episode was probably Radio Killed the Video Star bcuz of mY BOYS PENTIOUS AND VOX!!!!!!!!

And the most painful episode to watch was- no surprise- Masquerade

That episode was a fucking rollercoaster Jesus fucking Christ...

Those scenes with Angel and Valentino where so fucking visceral... like. Who the fuck wrote that. Who are you. Are you okay. Do you need help-

Tho I'm not sure abt how they're handling the ah- more serious bits of Angel's character. It is WAYYYYYY to early to tell and I think Loser wasn't like. Trying to downplay the situation. But the writers better have been careful moving foreward bcuz I can def see a world where Angel's arc goes very wrong very fast-

Also while we're criticizing: wasn't a fan of the pacing. Especially in episode two. Like I can look past it, but the way they breeze past some plot points kinda bugged me

Otherwise it was sooooooo fucking good man oh my god

THE HUMOR WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN PPL MAKE IT OUT TO BEEEEEE PPL NEED TO STOP SHITTING ON THE COMEDY IN THESE SHOWS MAN-

The gag where Niffty just fucking stopped thinking every time the camera turned on was so fucking good

Niffty in general was really fuckin funny

Alastor was a lot less prominent of a character then I thought he would be but tbh I think that's for the best. He's like Discord from My Little Pony, fun in small doses but if you don't set perameters for how often he appears and when he's willing to help it kinda breaks the show

Chaggie is adorable and I love them <3

I think this show does a really good job balancing the focus on the whole cast! These first 4 episodes seem to be pretty Charlie, Angel and kind of Vaggie heavy but everybody still gets their fair share of attention!

THE ANIMATIOJ OH MY GOD- IT WAS FUCKING PHENOMENAL IM LOSING MY M I N D

Im going feral IM GOING FERAL THIS EXCEEDED MY EXPECTATIONS AKFNVKKENFEKFNDN

I love comedy. I love musicals. I love drama. I love silly characters. I LOVE ANIMATION!!!!!!!

It's like the South Park movie but longer and better animated and IVE BEEN WAITING FOUR FUCKING YEARS-

Just. So excited overall. Can't wait to see where it goes. May make more posts abt my thoughts in tbe future.

[saylor-twift]

alright, so first off. This is my first time doing a req to a creator/author/writer I admire so much so hopefully I won't cause any confusion— ">-< but could you uhh do a wanderer x reader unrequited love? (eg: wanderer prefers someone over reader) I really want more angst to read and also with this topic. You don't have to take this request if you're not comfortable!

(❄️. SHON)

Yes yes I can!! This is such a coincidence cause I just recently made a very similar request to one of my mutuals haha. Recently I’ve lowkey had this brain rot of Wanderer having feelings for the traveler (Lumine) because i’ve been reading so much Scaralumi lmfao and it lowkey makes me kinda salty even tho i love them to death so that’s kinda the direction this will take :) Thanks so much for asking!!

side note: I’m so fking angry i literally had this whole thing proofread and totally ready like an hour and a half ago when my tumblr fucking shuts down and deletes all my work and I had already deleted it off the google doc so I could paste the version from tumblr so i had to go restore the google doc and ughhh it caused me an extra hour of work cause i had to proofread everything again. anyways, please enjoy :)

Live is to Love, as Love is to Hurt

word count: 6801

also heads up for anyone who doesn’t know, I like to refer to Wanderer as Kunimitsu cause that’s the name I gave him :)

Everyone knows, or should know at least, that when one decides to accept something, anything, that they are also agreeing to take on each and every single thing that comes with it. To look forward to the rebirth of spring means also accepting that the barren, frosty breath of winter will indeed return, turning the once lush gardens of the world into sharp, jagged blades of grass and trees devoid of green. The same is true when you decide to accept somebody into your life. You must know that no matter how benevolent and perfect to you they may seem, fate has its mishaps, and doesn’t always play a fair game. And yet there’s one more thing, one might think after learning all these things that the way they will be better off is to never take risks. And supposedly yes, maybe you won’t get hurt, but you also won’t live. Because to live is to love, to live is to hurt, to live is to heal.

This current chapter of life feels strikingly similar to one of those slice of life novels you’d expect to find at the bookstore on the corner of the street. Only it wasn’t something you read whilst sipping tea on a sunday afternoon, it’s more like the type of heart-breaking piece of literature you finish late on friday nights, the kind that leaves you restless and contemplating the rest of the weekend. Or in this case, the rest of the month. And instead of seeing yourself in the life of the main character and mourning for them as if they were your own, the one who hurts is you, and it feels like nobody from the sidelines is mourning on your behalf. It’s almost ridiculous the amount of times you’ve mentally punched yourself for being this distraught, doesn’t everybody experience heartbreak at least once in their life? Maybe they do, but not everyone feels it this hard. Not everyone devotes every single inch of love in their hearts towards one singular person, only to have it blown out like the candles on a birthday cake, because the candles of the one you love burn for somebody who isn’t you.

And maybe if you were younger, if you were less understanding, if you had less control… you would be vengeful, heart full of nothing but envy for the lovely woman whose presence has his full attention. But you’re not, because you’ve grown. You’re older, you’re wiser, you understand. You understand the kind of pain such a mindset would inflict not only on the people around you, but also yourself. It’s truly hard to feel hate for that beautiful woman. She’s ever so kind, and strong, and beautiful and perfect and everything you’ve somehow convinced yourself that you’re not. She’s never wronged you, it’s not her fault. Truthfully, it’s not anyone’s fault. But that won’t change the fact that it hurts. In fact, it maims your very soul more than any pain you could have felt before. Most people would wonder why you even felt for him in the first place if they knew the history the two of you had. Yet the answer comes clear as day. To feel such comfort around him is something that rarely comes from other people. You know you can speak your mind on a bad day without scaring him off, and he knows, you hope he knows, that you’d put up with and listen to him as much as he needed as well. You love the way you always have to stifle a laugh whenever he makes an inappropriate comment, or how he’s unafraid to let you know when you’re wrong. How he always has to ponder the mysteries of the world at such a deep level, never taking things at face-value. And how he always hears you out from your perspective, never making you feel crazy or out of place for your seemingly otherworldly ideas.

Maybe it irked you at first, his insouciant and immature behavior, but it’s difficult to keep lying to yourself when really you knew deep down how endearing it felt, to have someone close enough to share such experiences with. And yet, through all of this, it seemed you had read him all wrong. This was the first time you had ever loved someone this deeply, let alone loved at all. People these days, especially young people, seem to lack the mental complexities you’d prefer in a partner. You wanted someone you could love and understand, not just some accessory at the hip to just brag and boast about. Even with all the times he’d berated you with insults and poked fun at your mishaps, he still possessed a sort of depth to his mentality, the kind that honestly made you fawn over the way you could hold meaningful conversations without feeling like you didn’t belong. If you recall correctly, he did mention once that he wasn’t a fan of small talk. Maybe that was just the way he was, or maybe it came as a result of his seemingly never ending history of trauma. (it made your heart clench just thinking about it, but you rarely brought it up. You knew all too well he wasn’t fond of the subject)

It only made sense he managed to snatch your heart right up into an unbreakable death grip. You were in love with him, for sure and certain. And it was likely that undying inferno, clouding your correct judgment in a cloud of smoke and ash, that led you to be here in this scene, the very moment that truly broke your heart, for the very first time.

You’d seen him with the girl a number of times, and to be fair, neither of them had ever confirmed any affection for the other, so perhaps you were just overthinking it all. Maybe to think such things would only be setting yourself up for disappointment, but for now, that could be left to the future. Maybe, if you were to get over your fears and doubts for just a moment, you would tell him. Maybe plan something for just the two of you, like they do in those cheap romance novels, and over a glass of zaytun peach lemonade, you look him in the eyes and say, “I love you.” And he would reply with, “Yes, so do I.” And the day would end however the author of said cheap romance novel sees fit.

And so you decide to do exactly that.

You find yourself sitting in immense regret as you wait outside the doors to the Akedemiya, anxiously picking at the cuticle of one of your nails as the unforgiving sun beats down on the back of your head. You’ll likely never fully get used to Sumeru’s weather. Typically at this time of the week, he attends the usual Vahumana lecture, begrudgingly of course. That was one of the things he was fond of complaining to you about, specifically the professor, whom he described as a “sulking old wench on the verge of death.” Maybe the description was a little much, but it elicited little giggles out of you nonetheless. And as the clock hits two in the afternoon, your anticipation only increases as you watch the door open and close, pairs of students leaving in intervals. You instantly perk up as you see his slender figure push its way out from the large wooden doors, making a beeline directly away from where everyone else was heading. Caught up in simply admiring him as he strolls away, lost in a daze, you suddenly snap out of your daydream as the realization hits you that he’s the reason you’re here. If he gets away, you’ll lose your chance.

With one last quick, deep breath of reassurance, you jog up to his side before he’s too far away, bouncing on the balls of your feet. “Hey, hold on!” You call out, cheeks instantly redding as he cocks his head in your direction with a (thankfully) only mildly annoyed expression. Having a crush is so much more mortifying than you would have ever anticipated. “Hey-“

“What?” He interrupts, clearly already exasperated with whatever antics he thinks you intend to throw his way. “How was school?” You inquire, jogging up to his side again as he quickens his pace out of annoyance. “Don’t ask questions like that, I’m not your child.”

“Fine, my fault for wanting to know how you’re doing. I have a request for you.” You press on, not wanting to waste much time with his brashness. “I’m going to decline.” He insists. “No, you won’t. Well, maybe you will. But i’m politely requesting that you accept.”

“Well, you have to tell me what it even is first, no?”

You mentally roll your eyes. He always had to be like this, didn’t he? “I’m getting there. I was, um.. wondering if you were going to be busy this afternoon?” You question, cringing at the way the words failed to come out as smoothly as you had originally intended. He scoffs at this, followed by a laugh. “You’re hilarious. What do you actually want from me?”

“..what do you mean? I’m asking if you have any plans for the rest of today.”

“Why? Is Kusanali being overly dependent on her little errand boy again? I would’ve thought she would tell me herself, not send some messenger.”

This causes you to cringe. Despite the immense progress he’s made, he still can’t comprehend the fact that there are people who actually care for him and don’t see him as just some sort of a tool. “Oh come on, is that really the conclusion you’re going to jump to?” You ask with a hand on your hip. “What other reasons could you possibly have for seeking me out? Don’t tell me you actually want to spend time with me?” He quirks an eyebrow in amusement as he crosses his arms. He enjoys messing with you, he really does. “And what if I do?” You respond with an equally smug expression, seemingly forgetting about your previous nervousness and relishing in the fact that you can lightheartedly tease each other like this. “Then I’d tell you that you’re a fool. I don’t see any possible way you could benefit from being around me.”

“Why do you do this? Is it really so difficult to imagine that people enjoy being around you? Haven’t you spent enough time around me to know I’m not joking?”

He sighs, half in exasperation and half in defeat. “So you’re really saying you came all the way out here because you want to waste your afternoon on me? If I agree to whatever escapade you have planned, will you leave me alone then?” His voice is only slightly, but definitely noticeably softer than it was before. “I wouldn’t call it a waste. Please give yourself some credit.” You insist. “Fine, I’ll indulge you this once. But I better not hear any more of this.” He says, only mildly displeased. You smile madly to yourself, biting a lip as you fight to contain yourself, at least for the time required to form your next sentence. “Okay well, I’m not letting you back out now. Can we agree to meet somewhere then?”

“..if you insist.”

And not much longer after that, the two of you had agreed to meet a few hours later in the evening outside of the Grand Bazaar. Zubayr Theater had planned that day to host a small festival in honor of what Nilou liked to call it’s “grand reopening”. Following recent events, the matra of the Akedemiya had decided to lay back on some of their laws and views regarding the arts, meaning that the theater was free to perform as openly as it liked, with some rules, of course. Needless to say, Nilou was absolutely ecstatic. She’d choreographed a whole show solely for the sake of reopening, and the streets of Sumeru City were plastered with all of the posters and flyers. Not only were you more than happy to come and support your good friend and her passions, you were also quite fond of the arts and always enjoyed a good performance. Not to mention it made a decent first date spot for two aspiring lovers. (“Date” was a strong word, and you were fully aware of the fact that a date was not what this was. Nonetheless, you couldn’t help but daydream about such things.)

You’d graciously purchased a ticket for yourself as well as for him, much to his surprise. “And what if I hadn’t decided to show up? What would you do with your wasted money then?” He quirks as the two of you walk inside the theater, breathing in the scent of spices mixed with floral perfumes. “Well you’re here aren’t you? That means I don’t have to worry about that. But if for some crazy reason you did decide to ditch me, I’d just find some lucky unsuspecting stranger who’d appreciate a theater ticket much more.” You reply. “Of course you would. Always so generous.” He quips, not lacking his usual sarcasm. “Well what would you rather I do with it?” You question curiously. He scoffs. “That's not what I meant, your answer was fine. I’m just saying it’s so very like you.”

“Whatever, just come on. I think you might actually enjoy this, Nilou is very talented!” You chirp, skipping ahead to the doors of the auditorium, your enthusiasm showing right through. In truth, you had decided to bring him to a quiet place such as a theater as an excuse to not have to make too much conversation with him. The long performances would give you plenty of time to come up with what you were going to say once the time came. As guilty as it made you feel, you really only paid a fraction of attention to the lovely performance as your thoughts were lost elsewhere. It was finally beginning to dawn on you how anxious you really were, and a pool of regret starts forming in your chest as your mind conjures up all of the worst possible scenarios. He’s not exactly known for being the most compassionate person, so fear of rejection was only worse in this case. Would he ridicule you, or would he simply spit venom in your face like there’s no tomorrow? Either way, whether this night would turn out for the worse or for the better, you were too far in to turn back now. At least, that’s what you tried to convince yourself.

He didn’t seem to have much to say himself either, only making a snide remark as the curtains opened and remaining mostly silent for the rest of the performance. You’d almost say he was enamored with the dancers, watching them with a lovely sort of infatuation, almost as if he was also lost in his own little world. You find yourself continuously sneaking glances at him, whether to try and catch some sort of emotion on his face or simply just to look at him, you weren’t entirely sure. If he notices your constant little glances, he makes no comment. With a final flourish of sounds, music and lights that snaps you out of your anxiety-filled little daze, you zone back into the stage as the audience roars with applause and the curtains slowly come to a close. You breath in deep for your nose, realizing that you can no longer hide in the darkness and music of the theater. And for the first time since the beginning of the whole show, he speaks up. “You know, I might have doubted you a bit too much. It would be a lie to say that wasn’t a little enjoyable. You’re right, that girl does have some talent.”

Taking a minute to actually process that he was speaking to you, you blink a couple of times before turning to face him. “O-oh! See? I told you. Are you realizing now that you don’t always have to be so pessimistic?” He quirks an eyebrow at the way you appear to be so startled, but chooses to make no mention of it. “I hate to break it to you, but one night of little dance performances isn’t going to change my philosophy, no matter how much you want it to.” He chuckles as the two of you start to filter out with the rest of the crowd. “Maybe not tonight, but I bet one day I will.”

“Mhm. Good luck with that.”

By the time you exit the theater, the sun has almost completely gone down, only casting the city in the faintest remnants of orange and yellows. The ambience of the night can only be described as tranquil with the way it bathes the buildings in its warm purples and cooler blues. It fits him so well, you think. So well, you don’t even realize you’re staring. The moonlight illuminates the carefully sculpted features of his face, making him appear as if he were straight from one of the paintings of the masters. The artist clearly has a steady hand, with each brush stroke being carefully placed to exact precision, the colors fading into each other absolutely beautifully. It truly is a once in a lifetime experience to get the chance to lay eyes on somebody this breathtaking. You’re a sight for eyes, Kunimitsu. Are the words your brain decides to conjure up following this butterfly-inducing observation. But of course, such moments can only live so long as he decides to cut you off with a rather embarrassing reality check. “You’re staring. Something you want to say?”

The blush attacks your cheeks faster than you can even blink, eyes widening for but a moment. You’ve been caught red handed, nothing you can do about that. Instead of averting your gaze in shyness, you grasp tightly to that little sliver of confidence left from the beginning of this whole endeavor, using it as assistance for crafting your next words. “Hmm.. maybe there is.” The words fall out flawlessly, gaze never leaving his. And then there it is again, that familiar feeling of teeny tiny butterflies making themselves at home in the pit of your stomach with the way his eyes meet yours. “Then I think we should go find a place to sit. There’s… actually something I’ve been meaning to discuss with you as well.” He replies, with him being the one to break eye contact instead of you. If you strain your ears just hard enough, you swear he sounds uncharacteristically softer than usual, and you instantly wonder if he’s thinking the same thing you are. And with the way he immediately follows by tilting his hat down to cover his expression and quickens his pace, he has to be, you think. “Good. I wanted a drink, anyway.”

You imagine yourself being patted on the shoulder reassuringly, it’s truly now or never. You’re by yourself again, waiting in a surprisingly short line for lemonade. Disappointingly, the clearly under-staffed lemonade stand had quickly run out of many of the good flavors, including your favorite, zaytun peach. Deciding not to let it get you down, you settle on two glasses of plain lemonade, figuring that the Wanderer would prefer that kind anyway. You still hadn’t figured out what his deal was when it came to food. He didn’t seem like a picky eater, but he always grimaced anytime anyone made a comment regarding anything gooey and sweet. You hadn’t quite figured out if he hated all sweet things, or if it was just sweet things that also happened to be sticky… but no matter, if the citrus drink happened to not be to his liking, that was the least important concern on your mind at the moment. With annoyingly shaky hands and an increased heart rate, you take the two cool glasses of lemonade and make your way over to where your companion has already claimed a spot at a table, shaded and secluded away from the rest of the festival-goers.

You set the cups down, which he barely even acknowledges. Neither do you, practically forgetting about their entire existence the moment your legs hit the smooth wooden structure of the chair. He shifts in his seat, almost uncomfortably, you note, turning to face you. Much to your chagrin, he decides not to say anything, leaving the two of you in a dreadfully uncomfortable silence. “So-“

“You wanted to tell me something?” You interrupt. Truly you weren’t sure why, though it was most likely because you were trying to find some last minute way to further procrastinate your confession. He pauses for a moment, before inhaling sharply, followed by an unnecessarily long exhale. “I… suppose I do. I’ve given this quite a bit of thought, and I’ve decided that despite the way you annoy me and your persistent show of naivety, I still think you’d have a good outlook on my predicament.” Usually when he makes quips like this, you’d playfully roll your eyes, followed by a witty retort of your own. But it seems that at this point into the night, you’ve already spent up all your previously prepared confidence. Your hands are under the table, one finger working nonstop at picking a loose cuticle, already turning pink and uncomfortable and raw from the friction. “I’ll… try my best. What exactly is it?” Your voice comes out smaller than intended, and you wonder if he can sense your anticipation.

He makes an ‘ugh’ sound as his head drops forward, the bridge of his nose coming to land directly in between his pointer and thumb. “I just… I’m conflicted. I don’t…” This causes you to furrow your brows together at his odd display of vulnerability. It seems he’s at a loss for words, the first time you’ve ever witnessed such a thing. “About… what?” You query, clasping your hands together underneath the table. He squeezes his eyes shut and a forced exhale leaves his nose, and it’s the first time you think you’ve ever seen him willingly show that much emotion around you. “I’ve been… trying to come to terms with something as of late. And I’m just not understanding how all you mortals endure these kinds of things every day, it’s honestly appalling.” He lifts his head up from between his fingers, looking at you concernedly, as if he really was being honest about how he felt. “Okay, well first of all, I doubt that you actually feel things any less than the ordinary human, you just like to hide it. Second, what is it that’s bothering you even? You’re concerning me.” You comment. He scoffs. “The amount I feel is not the point. I am incredibly disturbed by this, and you are the only person I feel can advise me on what to do. You’re quite the expert on emotions, after all.”

You’re not quite sure whether he’s giving you a compliment or calling you emotional, but it didn’t matter. The fact that he’s even coming to you about something that clearly means so much to him hints at the fact that there might be some greater feeling lingering behind all of this. You’re about to open your mouth to ask once again what he means by all this, but he beats you to it, and you swear you see the apples of his cheeks turn a dusty rose color. “I keep having this reoccurring thought, about a person… that I may hold some sort of fondness for..”

Your breath hitches. This whole time your well-thought out (more like impulsive, but you digress) plan was to get him alone so that you would have to work up the courage on your own to confess to him. But now, was he going to do it for you? Would you be getting the happy ending you’d daydreamed about for so long? You zone out for the better part of his speech, attention only coming back for the last few words.

“…your friend, actually. You know, the one with the (color) hair? Surely you’ve noticed? That’s why I’m telling you, you’re the only one I feel even remotely comfortable with giving this information.”

What.

With those words, you swear you could literally feel your face turn white . Could you perhaps have misheard? Is he alluding to something else? It’s almost like you’re in denial. The only physical reaction this confession seems to get out of you is a blank stare, while your mind on the other hand is practically on a wild rampage. The man you love more than anything, more than life, more than the sun, more than yourself, sitting in front of you, telling you directly to your face that his heart belongs to somebody whose name is not yours. Whose whole persona you wish so dearly could be your own. And the audacity to ask for advice on what to do was really just the cherry on top. You feel absolutely mortified, like there’s a sizzling flame, a light in your stomach making you feel like you’d vomit the entirety of your organs at any given moment. He couldn’t possibly be lying either, with the way his whole demeanor seems to change to a completely different person when he speaks about her. He seems so oddly vulnerable telling you about how he feels. At the very least, he trusts you more than most to be so willingly sharing his thoughts with you. That’s something, at least.

After a short moment too long of silence, you blink away your surprise, putting on a soft expression that reads ‘congratulations, I’m so happy for you’ despite the ache forming in your heart. “Ah, is that so? You know, I think it’s great you’re allowing yourself this. She’s a beautiful girl, I’m sure she loves you just as much.” Gods, that hurt more than anything else you’ve ever had to say before. He pauses for a moment before speaking again, and you fear it’s because he’s noticed your trepidation. “You’re very perceptive for a mortal, you know. That much I’ve picked up on, if not anything else. So is that really what you think then? That she could really harbor any sort of affection for me, despite what I’ve done?” And if that doesn’t hurt even more. The first reason being that he clearly loves this girl even deeper than you’d originally thought, the second being that he still believes himself to be so inherently undesirable that he has to ask you for confirmation that another could love him back. And of course he’s lovable, he’s literally taken your very soul and intertwined it with his own.

“Kunimitsu, how could she not? Do you really not see anything in yourself of any value? Of course you’re loved. Despite what you think of yourself, and what you think others should think, you are meant to be cared for just as you are. I- she can see the way you’ve changed, and your efforts to heal and become better. If someone like you cares for her, there isn’t any possible way you aren’t dear to her as well.” The reason these words come out so easily can only be explained by the feelings you harbor so deeply for him. Maybe it sounds too much like a confession of your own, and despite trying to make yourself believe you say it for his own good, you know deep down it’s really because you want to relieve some of that ache for yourself. He looks at you in a relieved sort of way, almost endearing, yet still not fully believing. “Do I really deserve this..?” His eyes are by far the softest you’ve ever seen as he practically begs you to confirm it for him again. And damn it if you didn’t love him so much, if you weren’t so eager to please him. “You do. You really, truly do.” If only he knew how good you’d treat him if you were the one he longed for. If only he knew how hot your flame burned for him, if only he knew the way you longed to hold, caress, and simply just love him. And so you decide you can bear to look at him no longer, lest you break down in tears. “It’s getting a bit late, I think. I hope you think about what I told you. Good night, Kuni.”

You stand up, not really caring anymore if you seemed to end the night too abruptly. Maybe it was selfish to leave just like that, and maybe he could tell you were upset, but none of that mattered. Right now, you really wanted to just put yourself first for once. Nearly the instant you consider yourself far enough away from him or anyone else, you begin to break down. You roughly cover your mouth with the palm of your hand to cover the sound of a pathetic little sob that escapes your vocal chords. A shaky inhale follows as large droplets of salty tears quickly make their way down your cheeks from the corners of your eyes. Your other arm wraps around your midsection at a subconscious attempt at self comfort. You collapse against the slide of a building, sliding down the wall until you’re fully seated on the ground, allowing your emotions to fully take a hold of you. For what feels almost never ending, you cry and cry and cry until you don’t have it in you to produce anything more. You take another shaky breath, whether to calm yourself down or to replace all the oxygen lost, you’re not sure. It doesn’t really help either way.

After several more minutes of just sitting there, hugging your knees to your chest and looking up absentmindedly at the night sky, quite literally contemplating everything about your life, you’re snapped out of your thoughts by the sounds of soft footsteps coming down the cobblestone road. You panic, desperately not wanting anyone to see you in such a state. Upon further inspection, the sounds of the approaching person become clearer. It sounds as if the owner isn’t wearing any shoes. Instead, there’s also the faintest sound of jingling bells. Turning your head slightly to the side, you catch a glimpse of exactly who seems to be approaching, and you sigh in relief. You actually wouldn’t mind a little company from this person, if they even notice you hiding in the depths of your despair. The little dendro archon strolls casually down the street, seeming to be thinking of nothing but how tranquil the ambience is. Part of you wants to step out from your hiding place and greet her, the other urging you to curl away even further. Neither of the thoughts win, resulting in you staying exactly where you are.

The white-haired little sprout hums an old Sumeruen tune as she bounces on the balls of her feet, not a care in the world. Your heart warms a little at the sight. Just as the thought finishes passing through your love-sick mind, she cocks her head to the side, noticing your presence. With a little pleased gasp, she bounces right over to you. “(Name), I’ve been looking all over for you! Why are you sitting all alone?”

You give her a smile, only half attempting to conceal your distress. You don’t really want her to question you about your misfortune, yet at the same time, it would feel really nice to tell somebody you trusted as much as her about it. “Hi, Nahida. I’m just taking a breather, I guess. It’s really nice out tonight, isn’t it?” Your voice is soft and smooth, as it usually is when making conversation with her. “It is indeed! I was just out taking a walk myself. My intention was actually to find you, I was wondering if you had made it to the festival. It seems I ended up getting a bit distracted… so I’d say it’s actually quite lucky I managed to run into you here. Silly me!” She sits down next to you, bells rustling against each other. Her short legs stick out straight and she rests her hands atop her lap. “You were looking for me? What for exactly?” You curiously ask, resting your cheek on the palm of your hand while your head turns to look at her. Your eyelashes are still clustered together in little points as a result of the river of tears just a few minutes prior.

She taps a finger against her chin, a typical habit of hers reserved for thinking. “To be honest… I don’t think I really had a reason. I was just seeking your company! Ever since I met you and the traveler, I’ve found that I quite enjoy spending time with my friends.” This elicits a giggle from you. She didn’t even intend for it to be a compliment, her comment was pure honesty. But nevertheless it succeeded in making you feel a little better to know that you were on her mind, even if she had no idea what you were feeling at the moment. “Well I’m glad you found me then. Did you go to the festival today?”

“No, I didn’t get the chance to. But…” She trails off, giving you a puzzled yet concerned expression.

“Is there something on your mind? I know I’m not an expert yet on human emotions, but I feel as if you are acting differently than you normally do.”

She sits patiently, waiting for a response. True, she had a bit of a hard time contemplating the more complex emotions of humans, but she was still one of the most empathetic people you’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting.

You sigh, might as well tell her the truth. “Nahida, I… you’re right. I am thinking about something. I just don’t know exactly how to tell you..” Your gaze falls down, suddenly you become more interested in picking at your cuticles than the inquisitive girl beside you. She hums in understanding. “I see...” She sits in silence, words failing to find her. They don’t seem to come to you either.

“..shall I read your mind? Not to intrude, but do you think it would help? Would you like me to know what’s wrong?” She pressed, almost carefully. After a bit of trial and error, the young archon had learned that most people don’t appreciate being bluntly asked for their feelings. So, she’d learned to take things with a bit more heed. Any other day, you probably would have laughed, telling her not to worry herself over you. But, thanks to none other than Nahida herself, you’d begun to slowly become a bit more open with how you felt. She’d advised, after reading some self-help book on managing emotions, that you start telling people when you felt something that made you hurt. And as honestly awkward as it was, it was helping. In lieu of a response, you nod your head in answer to her question with a small ‘mhm’ sound, the words once again failing to come to you.

She nods her head as well, giving your shoulder a gentle pat before ever so softly taking your hand in both of hers, treating it as if it were a fragile glass ornament. She gives it a soft kiss before grasping it more firmly, shutting her eyelids before beginning the process of entering your consciousness. Without even trying, you replay the events of earlier that afternoon in your mind, cringing the whole way through. It brought a tough sort of ache into your chest, sort of like bread dough with too much flour. After only a few more seconds of replaying painful scenes and holding your breath without even realizing, she opens her eyes, but chooses not to release your hand just yet. When her expression meets yours, it can only be described as sorrowfully compassionate.

“Oh…” Is the only sound that escapes her lips. You smile sadly and attempt to laugh in order to lighten the mood, regretting it instantly the second the noise emitted from your throat turns into a sob. You cover your mouth with your hand as the tears return yet again. Nahida stands on her knees to better reach you, wrapping her small arms around your shoulders, patting your back comfortingly. “I am so, so, so sorry (Name). If only I had known… he hadn’t even told me about his feelings for her.” She coos. Speaking through your tears, you make an attempt to defend her position. “It’s not- It’s not your fault. It’s not anyone’s fault. But it doesn’t make it hurt any less.” You let your head hang low with no more energy left to hold it high.

“You know that I’ve never experienced such heartbreak personally, but I can imagine it hurts just as much as you say. Please don’t start to think anything less of yourself because of this, you are still perfect.” She lifts herself from the embrace, holding your head in both of her hands. You look up at her with tear stained cheeks that glisten in the moonlight, giving a watery laugh. “Nahida, you are so nice to me. You think you don’t understand emotions, but you still care about mine more than a lot of people I’ve met.”

“It’s my duty as the Archon of Sumeru, isn’t it? I must attend to all the needs of my people. Political, physical, and I also believe emotional. And as one of my newfound friends, I need to take care of you too.” She smiles, resembling that of a proud child after their mother congratulated them on a well-earned school grade. It makes you smile too. “I guess it is then. Thank you, Nahida. You are really a good friend.”

“And so are you! Now, I want you to promise me something, okay? Go to bed tonight as soon as you can, get lots of good rest. And tomorrow make sure to eat a healthy breakfast and get lots of sunshine. Sunshine is proven to lift moods significantly! Can you do that for me?” She counsels, this time resembling that of a mother caring for her ill child. You nod in agreement. “Sure. I’ll try my best.” You know full well agreeing to her worried demands was only to make her happy. Truthfully, you’re not sure for how long this heartbreak will plague your mind. It’s not everyday the love of your life blatantly states to your face that they love somebody who isn’t you. Some people would get angry when faced with a situation like this. Angry at the boy, angry at the other. Angry at themselves, even. But as of right now, you can’t find it in you to be angry. The feeling lingering behind from the shipwreck only seems to be a deep sort of pain, the kind that hollows out your chest and resides deep in the darkest of corners, it’s shadows seeping out to infest every single inch of you. Despite the sunshine peeking in, maybe from the kind words of a friend such as Nahida, the shadows don’t seem all that repulsed by it. When you were younger, you once told yourself you weren’t interested in the idea of falling in love. After reading so many books, nothing about the topic ever appealed to you. But as most people know, lives hardly go as they are planned, hardly follow along with the intentions. You hadn’t meant to fall in love with him, you hadn’t even tried. And maybe that’s what made it hurt so bad, because it seemed the universe had surprised you with a gift so lovely. You accepted, because who wouldn’t turn down such a generous item? Only to find out the universe had made a mistake, that lovely present tied with a satin bow was not in fact made for you, but rather instead for the lovely person next door with sparkling eyes like diamonds and a heart of gold.

Right now, your eyes feel much too clouded to even have a chance at sparkling, and your heart too heavy to be made of anything but black, crumbling coal. Maybe you’ll get over him, or maybe you won’t. Maybe this will be the kind of first love that stays by your side the rest of your life, the kind you tell stories to your grandchildren about when they ask you if you’ve ever been in love. Or maybe the fates will have a change of heart and decide to grant you the wish you’ve been so desperately clinging on to. Either way, you love him. And there will always be a part of you that hopes, maybe, he’ll love you too.

[tastytoastz]

I just want to say that the most recent chapter, at the time of writing this, of your fic (where Pac and Mike travel back in time to a 2b Fit, forgive me for forgetting the name) had me so enthralled. I've said this before but I don't think there are nearly enough fics that thoroughly explore the absolute internalised homophobia a man would develop in a place like 2b, so to have a fic like yours properly portray it is like a dream. That chapter has been stuck in my mind since I first read it, and I've reread it a couple of times.

I can't get over how well you showed that he wasn't just angry, but genuinely terrified. I love the emphasis on him being above all just so fucking scared of that information existing out loud. It's such a good angle. And he's not completely dead shocked by the revelation, and jumps straight into denial, which makes it come across - to me, anyway - as if he has already been aware of this fact about himself for a while, like he knows, and he actively works to hide it everyday. There's so much implied in what isn't said . It leaves you wondering how long he's known, how much he thinks about it, if anyone else in his life has ever known, if he has witnessed first hand what happens to people like him (has he ever watched someone get killed for that while having slurs and horribly vulgar and vivid insults thrown at them, and tried his hardest not to picture himself in that position, as the victim?) ... And most of all you wonder what the aftermath of the interaction looks like on his end. Is he panicking silently up in that room, expecting a mob at his door by morning? What is he thinking, what's running through his head? What does he expect to happen now?

I just love the angle you took and how it was written, and that you decided to pick up the heavy subject matter and write it where a lot of other writers seem hesitant. It's so intriguing .

Thank you so much for this ask!!! I could go crazy over this chapter as well and point out so many details, I'm gonna get into some here, but not all (since I wanna keep some stuff ambigitous/secret still and cuz if i mentioned it all it would be a long post, but I will probably go deeper into some more things once the fic is over cuz I have so many things and smaller details I wan't to get into!!! ) (Also I guess if you want to keep thing ambigious and not 'peek behind the curtain' about some things with this fic don't keep reading)

I have seen some people say Fit's reaction to Mike's comment is with self-denial but honestly it's a lot closer to just being him denying Mike and Pac's words. He's not lying to himself, he's strictly lying to Pac and Mike, and I'm glad I was able to make that clear and people are picking up on it!

Not gonna go to much into it right now ( that's for later in the fic 🤫), but he's very aware he is gay.

As a queer person myself homophobia is sadly not something i'm unfamiliar with. I have experinced it directed towards me and I have seen it happen to other people. Meanwhile i've also done research about internalised homophobia as best I can. I know it's a heavy subject matter (and the fic has a lot of violence/gore as well, it's rated M for a reason) so I'm glad so many people are intrigued by the fic despite it (however I fully understand if someone would not like the themes and cuz of that won't read it). I'm hoping to portray it and handle the themes as best i can.

I also think it would just makes sense from a character perspective, you have a man who has been on 2b2t for years, surrounded by slurs for all lgbtq memebers and wathcing people get specially targeted for stuff like that, and that would fuck with you as a closeted gay person. Not only bring you fear of being "found out", but also adapting homophobi language to look less like "one of them" while also just ingraning it in yourself.

Fit's been told the person he is bad, and knows that if people find out he's gay there will be a lot of negative consequnces, so he hides it. And then here comes Mike, not only saying that he knows he's gay but also that "it's obvious" that he likes Pac. For Mike and Pac it's a factual thing they know, while they also know is dangerous to Fit in the wrong hands. They also think it's obvious Fit likes Pac beacuse they know what to look for.

For Fit it sounds like these random guys, despite his best efforts, knows he's gay, the other says he has photo evidence he's gay, and then said he is awful at hiding it. These two people could ruin his life and have him killed so easily. That's what Fit heard and that is terrifying.

This is also one of the reason this fic is only from Pac's POV becuase I want it to be as unclear for the reader what Fit is thinking as it is for Pac. You don't know how Fit thinks in the past, what ideas he has or how he looks at thing which I think it both intruging for readers but also terrifying. You never know what Fit's next move is going to be.

Once again, thank you so much for the ask! I love talking about my fics so thank you for giving me a reason to!

[thetopichot]

•°♧ Auron Fluff Alphabet ♧°•

2/7 of the Yuuriboys. I'm working hard over here with these. These fluff alphabets are quite a creative workout for my writer's brain. However, this one was easy to write since I don't stop talking about this motherfucker. He's just too fine.

Anyway, enjoy!

CW: Suggestive

A = Abundance Of Love (Are they a loud lover that loves to express their love in many ways or are they a quiet lover that loves those quiet, intimate moments?)

This man is absolutely a quiet lover. As much as he wants to show everyone that you are his, the distance must remain between you two during office hours. However, when he does have you all to himself, you KNOW that man is gonna treat you right. He's more romantic than he says. He says that he's not a romantic type, but bro is holding you & telling how beautiful you are. Like, STOP LYING.

B = Brave (Were they the first to confess? If so, how did the confession go?)

Yes, he was & he genuinely thought that the confession would go worse. Maybe he was worried that you wouldn't like him. He does stay in his ivory tower alone, so he never got the chance to take an interest in anyone. When he saw you, though, he switched up real fast. Luckily, the confession went well & he was honest to god RELIEVED. I guess his ivory tower will be less lonely now.

C = Control (Do they take the wheel of the relationship or do they let someone else do the driving?)

I feel like he takes the wheel of the relationship. His whole story is basically about how one loses control & gets back on their feet afterwards, so expect him to take the wheel. Another thing is that he has this huge thing with taking care of problems without being asked to. If anything gets in the way of him or you, he will handle it accordingly. That is what he is supposed to do as his role in almost everything. Well, that's how he put it.

D = Dreamboat (What do they find attractive in their partner(s)?)

People would say that confidence is quite an attractive trait & they are right but listen, consider this; optimism. I feel like this is quite a controversial answer, but I feel like he likes more than just confidence. He likes a different kind of confidence. It's the fact that no matter the situation or who they are. You always find the best in things & the best in people. You believe that there is something more than meets the eye & he admires that. You see him more than just a cruel crime boss. You see him as him & he loves you for that.

E = Empathetic (If their partner(s) was in a not so good mood, how would they cheer them up?)

He's not really good at comforting people since he comes off as extremely blunt. However, that doesn't mean he isn't willing to try. He can try to comfort you with his words, but I feel like he would rather just hold you & listen to your rant. You ranting about your feelings & him holding you while you do that makes him feel like he's pretty decent at comforting. He's much more of a listener in rants.

F = Forgiving (If they had a fight with their partner(s), how would they apologize? Or would they be petty about it?)

Naturally, Auron would push people out of the way if they got in the way. However, you're not just people. You're his darling & the one thing he hates more than anything is to lose you, someone he cares about deeply. He probably was the one who initiated the fight since I know that man is stubborn & he will hold his ground, but there are more important things than pride. He is the first to apologize & he genuinely feels real fucking bad about it. He hates getting in arguments with you, but please reassure him that it's normal to get into arguments & that he doesn't have to push people away afterwards.

G = General (Random Fluff Headcanon)

Okay, I've been talking about this ALOT because it's important to me that I have this concept imprinted inside your hippocampus. I keep thinking about that one ATSV scene where Miles has this art page of Gwen. Are you seeing where I'm going with this? Auron just looks through your sketchbook to see an art page of him in there. He just looks at you & smiles. "I missed you, too." This is a bit self-indulgent jahqniajaiai

H = Home (How would they feel living with their partner(s)?)

HELL YEAH BROTHERRR 🦅🦅

He loves the idea of it. As much as he enjoys being alone, it's nice to wake up next to someone you love dearly. He's not safe from being domesticated & to be honest, he would let that shit happen. It could be your idea or his. It's up to you. In the end, just hearing your voice every morning is just soothing. LET HIM BE HAPPY GODDAMN IT 😤

I = Idealistic (What's their personal preference in a special someone?)

He doesn't take interest in timid people. He wants someone who knows exactly what they're doing rather than someone who isn't sure about their decisions. He wants someone who gets the job done. At the same time, he just wants someone a little more than that. Someone that just understands him. So throw that shit all into one quality & you get someone that is preceptive.

J = Jealousy (Do they get protective of their partner(s) when someone flirts with them?)

You bet your bottom quarter, except he doesn't really show it. He's cool, sorta calm, & collected. He's not gonna shout at them as maybe simple as a harmless flirt such as compliments like "Hey, you look very nice today." If they made you uncomfortable, on the other hand, he will be handling it. He ain't fucking around. If he gets jealous, it really depends on when we are talking about. If it's before you got together, then yes. VERY. If it is after you got together, not as much. You belong to him & he will prove the whole office if he has to.

K = Key To The Heart (What is something that will make them fall in love instantly?)

Bro fell in love the first time he saw you. He noticed that you dressed nice & how you were confident about getting the job. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?? He was HOOKED. It was love at first sight. I WISH I WAS MAKING THIS SHIT UP & I thought that I was DOWN BAD.

L = Luxurious (Do they spoil their partner(s) rotten? If they do, how do they spoil them?)

He is rich. You already know. However, I'm not gonna leave ya guys hanging with just that.

He likes to make his gifts very personalized for you. It's why he asks for your measurements, such as your fingers for getting rings or your ahem ahem NECK for uh suggestive reasons that I shall not disclose because we don't do NSFW here. So, I'm leaving that up to your imagination. Anyway, he does enjoy spoiling you mostly for him, though. There are some outfits that he wants to see you in. 😳

M = Marriage (How would they feel about getting married?)

I feel like he would like the idea of it. Of course, like anybody else, he would be a bit nervous about it. He's nervous because of how important this feels. It's something he HAS to get right in his eyes. So expect that man to plan this shit for MONTHS. This man might even rehearse before purposing to you. When everything falls in line, he does all of this fancy ass shit. He has this personal driver prepared to drive to a special location. I'm talking about a red carpet to the limo, then it takes you out of the city to a cliff that has a gazebo. You can see that fine ass man waiting for you & then you hop out of the limo. You see a trail of red roses & red candles lit.

You follow it & you meet your man all dressed up to the NINES. Like bro is dripped the FUCK out. Then he goes on to this speech on how much he adores you & how much you mean to him. Of course, the fine ass man gets on one knee & goes:

"Will you marry me?"

Bitch, YES.

N = Nobility (How honest are they to their partner(s)? Do they hide anything?)

As much as he trusts you, he does hide things. However, that doesn't mean he lies to you. He's unmoved by truth, but this truth is truly moving his ass. He did tell you that he is a criminal who killed more than one guy, but I feel like that as much he can tell you. The more you know, the more in danger you will be. He doesn't want you involved. He would rather you be unaware & safe than to be knowledgeable & in danger.

O = Overwhelmed (If they were in a not so good mood, how can their partner(s) help them out?)

Honestly. When he is stressed, he's definitely telling you not to worry about him. He always says that "I'm fine, rook. You don't need to worry about me." but in reality, this man needs comfort more than anything. During office hours, you could check in on him. Trish might find you suspicious for constantly going into his office, say, 6 times within the same 2 hours. Or a better, less suspicious way is taking care of him at home. Tell him to cancel whatever he's doing for the night & take a break with him. Of course, it's not gonna be that easy. However, persistence is key. He'll give in & just put his head in your lap. He enjoys the warmth that comes from your thighs, especially when you play with his hair. He might even fall asleep.

P = Passionate (What is something to them that means a lot to them that only their partner(s) knows about it?)

His writing. That's something he almost never shares with anyone. The only people he has shared it to were Charlie & of course, you. He finds his writings very important to him since they reveal ALOT about him, especially how he feels. Most of his writing recently has been about you, so he wants to keep his writing private. Bro is like me fr because I'm nervous when I show people my headcanons, so he's not alone.

Q = Quirky (Something silly that they do.)

On Auron's character design stream, Yuuri mentioned that Auron would own a multipen & I'm going add onto that. Auron owning a multipen reminds me of that kid in class who would write in a pretty font & make it cute when literally the topic is the most disturbing thing ever. That was Auron & still is.

R = Romantic (What is their love language?)

Call this man the Pokémon master because this bitch caught them all but if I had to pick a one, this might be controversial answer, acts of service. Just hear me out.

Auron does things for people without being asked to & never complains about it. He fully accepts the responsibility of taking care of everything & everyone, which leads to his love language being acts of service. He does go a bit too far & neglects his own needs because I believe that he doesn't see himself as a priority & there are other matters that are more important than himself right now. Please take care of that man because he needs someone to see him as a priority rather than something that can be pushed to the side for later.

S = Sublime (What is the best gift that their partner(s) can give them?)

He doesn't really ask for much besides your time & all of your love in return. He's not interested in getting gifts & he probably wouldn't want you to get him one since he's rich. Plus you do just fine as a present but you say fuck it & get him a gift anyway. The first idea was to get him a book, but that would be too obvious. You want something little more meaningful. You decided to somewhat write a half decent poem about how much you appreciate him. It's not the best writing in history, but he's enjoys that you put love & thought into it. That's enough for him.

T = Touching (How do they feel about PDA?)

Yeahhhh, probably not. He isn't really too fond of PDA, especially during office hours. He doesn't wanna look like he plays favorites, in my opinion. After hours is a different story because you two are alone & he has you all to himself, so he would rather that.

U = Undeniable (Did everyone know about their crush on their partner(s)?)

Nope. He is quite phenomenal at being discreet, plus who would anyone in their right mind would take interest in the boss? IT'S US ACTUALLY SUAJNAAUJA

V = Visionary (What do they want their future to look like with their partner(s)?)

My first initial thought was "Maybe, he might give the crime thing." but oh sweet Louie from 5 minutes ago, there is no fixing this man.

Although, I think he would want to move away from the city & go into this warm, cozy setting he's been writing about. I doubt he would give up the crime thing since that's his responsibility & a thing that was passed down from Faust's dad to him, but who knows, maybe he might pass it down to someone he trusts. Maybe he might become a writer & just enjoy his life with you. We may never know.

W = Wacky (General Fluff Headcanon. Again.)

I like to think the way he sleeps is just wrapping himself in a blanket burrito. I dunno I think it's funny. Crime boss in a blanket burrito is the most fire thing ever.

X = Xaroncharoo (Yes, that's a word. Look it up. In a domestic sense, what are they exceptional at in the home?)

Cleaning. He's making sure this house is fucking NEAT. Everytime I think about him cleaning, I think about those moms that clean the houses like hell because company is coming.

"I don't care if we have to throw everything out, rook. I want this place to look like a new mediterranean fusion restaurant by noon."

Y = Yearning (If their partner(s) went out to get something without them/went off to work, how would they feel about it?)

Z = Zonked (How do they cuddle?)

Jokes on you, you goober. You guys already work together as it is. So it's not a problem because he can just watch you from the cameras. However, if you went by yourself without him? He's probably getting you an escort to take to where you need to be. You insist on like, "Hey, I'm totally fine. I can just drive there & when I get there, I can just call you." or "My friend can pick me up, " & all of that. In the end, you have an escort to take you to Weis. He may not look like it, but he does miss you when you're gone.

Head first in his boobs. That's exactly what we're doing. He would probably hold you on top of him while you just enjoy the warm comfort of his boobs.

☆ミ Author's Notes Underneath ☆ミ

🩷 - Let's fucking go. 2 down & 5 more to go. This shit is definitely gonna take all of November & maybe December, too. This is probably one of the most biggest writing challenges I have worked on yet. However, it's good to get my writers brain going.

Another good news, I'm a sibling again! I have another sibling now & she is so silly. I'm happy to have another one, even though being the eldest sibling is such a pain in the ass. You just gotta do what ya gotta do sometimes.

[dee-the-red-witch]

hi so. i'm sorry if you feel like this is something you've talked about too much but i'm genuinely having a hard time understanding- what's the issue with femboys? or is it a finnster-specific issue...? idk i can see how it's an issue of like. performing femininity but not really accepting what womanhood really means but what makes it different from drag in that case? or am i going in the wrong direction trying to understand? i have amab as well as afab ppl in my life that identify as femboys and use it as a loosely-nonbinary term but i also know a couple femboys that are. hm. probably eggs leaning on the term that's less "scary" when it comes to confronting gender, is it about that....?

sorry if this is exhausting for you to discuss i'm just confused and trying to understand

Ok, keep in mind, this is a nonny. Which means I need to treat this with the intent that it's bait. Because that's what fucking happens a lot to folks. So I'm picking my words. 1. Show me where I said I have a problem with femboys in general. Because honestly? No problem with the identity. No problem with the concept. Same with drag, same with Crossdressers, same with sissys. They're all just as valid. What I have a problem with is when people specifically use and abuse things like F1nn5ter's (last I checked, still using he/him pronouns, so that's what I'm using here) use of trap content. Content that gets trans women beaten, abused, exiled, ostracized, and killed on a daily basis to make profit, and does it scot free of any societal penalty, partly because of a massive supporting userbase and fame, and partly because he wasn't out about being a trans woman yet. That right there is where my problem is. People can and should explore, play with, perform, exist in femininity however and whenever they want, but the problem is ONE GROUP OF US KEEPS GETTING PUNISHED FOR IT while the others see far less, if ever. So again, no problem with the femboy identity or femboys in general, but oh yeah, big problems with the difference in treatment. 2. I'm also gonna ask this in return- why am *I* your expert on this subject? Because this happens to so many trans women- we're out, we get seen enough to be noticed, and suddenly we're supposed to be the pillars of the community, delivering Julia Serrano level philosophy, flawless looks, opinions, and knowledge? There's lots of other folks to ask this kind of thing about, why go to the terminally weird, 46-year-old, *OUT AND TRANSITIONING FOR LESS THAN THREE YEARS STILL* writer, artist, leatherworker, and tattooist, who's still VERY clearly in the process of dealing with her own self identification and a lot of past and present trauma, and think I'm going to be the one who's going to give you the perfect answer for this? (lbr, again, so many trans women get quizzed like this, then publicly crucified for saying the slightly wrong thing- see that bit about bait again? because oh yeah, this tactic, intentional or otherwise, has been seen a LOT this year.) Because honestly, there isn't a perfect answer. It's yet another messy human subject because all of us are messy to some extent to begin with. It's never going to have perfect sense or logic. I honestly don't think that it should. Perfect answers tend to not encompass being human answers very well at the same time.

And also, I'm not an expert. Nor should I have to be one. Especially when in my usual fields, I get to charge 50-100 bucks an hour for consulting, and here, I'll be lucky if you kick five bucks in my paypal or gfm in exchange for this. That said, nonny, hope you have a good night. Keep in mind this whole #2 section? Is rhetorical. I'm not expecting a dialogue or reply, and I don't really want one, at least not one with a greyface and shades. If you want to talk more? come off anon.

[opalobviously]

Me personally, involving the Drake n Kendrick beef?

I'm a full Kendrick fan, West Coast Mfs-but, I can see what Drake was *going* for.

His problem was he was treating this like he was just battling a rapper with less numbers than him. On Paper? this is true, and Drake's strategy for the beef makes sense.

-Respond to Like that with push-ups, a decent hit, clearing out all of his opponents at once except for Kendrick (And, little did he know, Rick Ross n Future)

-troll a bit and goad Kendrick into responding faster so he could slam him (I don't think he went abt this right, and I will elaborate on that in a second)

-after he gets a chance to let his responses out? Killshot. Bring in the heavy hits, the allegations, make it clear you won the beef, and dip, make it clear the smaller artist simply isn't worth more time and effort.

It's overall not a bad strategy....on paper.

But this is Kendrick Lamar.

As Any Avid Kendrick Fan will tell you, Kendrick is a Masterful Lyricist, a pretty deep dude in general, and, above all, a man who is persistent in using his music to push a message no matter what. Beyond the Moral high ground this seems to place him on at times, that simply means he isn't gonna give up. Drake should have expected more bombs after Family matters-in fact, he should have expected a lot. So, I'm gonna be going over how I personally would have done the beef with Kendrick, because at a certain point it was inevitable.

Pushups:

To be perfectly honest, I think Pushups was a great song. It was a decent response to Like that, as well as snapping back at the other people aimed at Drake, like Rick Ross, Future, Metro Boomin, the Weeknd, and I believe Ja Morant, even aiming a light stray at J Cole for dipping. At this point in the beef, it was still up to either side, so I make no changes here.

Taylor Made Freestyle

Definitely what I consider the first Lyrical Fuck Up of the beef. Considering the Allegations on Drake not being a real rapper, being a culture Vulture, and having ghost writers, I genuinely cannot see how he thought using AI voices was a good idea in the slightest, not only of the legendary Snoop Dogg, but of the Late Great Tupac Shakur. In the eyes of almost anyone west Coast, it highlights the fact that you don't give a single solitary FUCK about the culture, much less are a part of it. What I do here, is simply adjust the angle. I still think that dropping Taylor Made is important, but I abandon the AI idea in it's entirety. Instead, I focus much more heavily on the Taylor swift and K dot thing, calling him pussy in as many ways as possible without using AI. Maybe a couple bars along the lines of:

Sniper from the mountain aiming low so I can Pop a Vet Aimed at the king but you missed, now I'm Cocking Back Can't believe some white chick is the reason you ain't Dropping yet She probably make you get her more money for her Private Jet

Reasonable lyrics for a beef like it was at the time I think. Contains a couple double entendres, sounds decent, hits pretty hard, and has the same general intent: Make Kendrick mad, and give him more that he has to respond to.

Family Matters

Family matters is probably drake's best song in the beef, and it makes sense. he had intended for it to be the KILLSHOT, and I am willing to wager that he had at least some parts of it ready as soon as he dropped Pushups, just waiting to see Kendrick's response so he could add something responding to his own song and make it a complete slam. If I'm Drake here, I focus more on the wife beater allegation, just by a little bit. To be clear, how Drake (or his ghost writers?) did it was very good, with a hard hitting quotable line

"When you put your hands on your girl, is it self defense cuz she bigger than you?"

Even my family, all west coast ride or dies, thought Drake got Kendrick when Family matters dropped. It was great, the timing of it, the intensity of it, the fact it dropped same day as 6:16 in LA, it was just awesome.

Then....the real bomb dropped.

Dealing with Meet the Grahams

It was at this point in the beef that Drake was CLEARLY cooked. that was a fucking horror scene. The worst part is that Drake couldn't use the same route: Kendrick aired out his own dirty laundry on Mr Morale. It would be stupid to try and use that angle anyway, Kendrick predicted it all the way back in Euphoria. So, the KILLSHOT didn't work. Here, if I'm Drake, I'm panicked, because a response is needed, but if it's lackluster, that's it. First, deny the allegations of pedophilia IMMEDEATELY (I'm pretending that in this universe I am a Drake, who did not commit anything listed here). The daughter I can reveal as a fake later, let them talk, let hype build up. but the Pedo shit? can't fly, can't let me turn into P Diddy. once that's in place, I spend maybe 2 days working on a final kill shot

The Heart Part 6

My problem with this one is that it felt like he was trying to go out on his own terms when the people clearly did not want that. his biggest fans needed to see him Whoop Kendrick back, not say it's summer vibes time. now, the fake daughter drop? genius if it's true, however, the IMMEDEATE denial of it earlier makes the move have less oomph, so I don't do that myself. also, FOR GODS SAKE DONT BRING UP MR MORALE IDIOT, HE LITERALLY TOLD EVERYONE YOU WOULD DO THAT IN LIKE THE FIRST PART OF EUPHORIA

"Fabricating stories on the family front, cuz you heard Mr Morale

A pathetic Master Manipulator I can smell the tales on you now..."

Exapserated sigh at this Canadian Dumbass

Anyway. What I do is the daughter drop, and deny, questioning the Validity of the rest of Kendrick's claims. Maybe, just maybe, make a hint to Michael Jackson having been Alleged of the same stuff? they never did prove he did it you know, and they straight up patted him down, took him to court, everything. It'd be a decent comparison, because a decent amount of people are still conflicted on whether he did it, even with all evidence pointing to say he did not. After that? idk, but I would personally make a song on BBL drizzy to make fun of Metro Groomin.

ACTUALLY.

that's exactly what I would do.

Make a song on BBL drizzy, dissing Kendrick for affiliating with Metro, of whom just as much if not more proof of grooming tendencies is out as Drake, thanks to those damn tweets (Metro was born in 1993, no matter how you spin it, the earliest of the tweets he was 18, 2011, and the tweet "She may be young but she ready" happens in 2014, when he's 21 years old. concerning to say the least)

"You a hypocrite Dot, Idiot Dot, and above all you a liar. How you shooting at any pervert that lives, but Metro's out the line of Fire?"

and yeah, that's about it.

Kendrick totally won btw, this is a theoretical "What if Drake was ACTUALLY a rapper, not a little bitch boy who uses ghostwriters and AI to do all his work?"

[raina-at]

Year in fic review 2023

Total number of completed stories: 4, I finished Spare Parts in 2022, just finished posting in 2023.

Total word count: About 50 k (published, god knows how many words of unfinished WIPS and abandoned one-shots)

Fandoms written in: BBC Sherlock, I'm a one-trick pony these days ;-)

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?

Hm, I suppose less? And not the things I expected. I started writing a lot of long, plotty fics but apparently, it wasn't the year for long and plotty fics. I suppose I didn't have the brain space for long and plotty.

What’s your own favorite story of the year?

Probably Nothing Gold Can Stay, because I had this idea months and months ago, of John having a bit of a crisis before his wedding. I had this one piece of a core of a fic, the whole nucleus where John tells Sherlock nobody ever sticks with him, ever. And then I had three different fragments of fics trying to make it work, and every one had something amazing in it, but I just couldn't make it gel. And then I thought of the famous The thing you wanted to say, say it now, and the scene on the bench in TSOT, and bam, I had a fic. It came out in stops and starts of 200-word chunks, while John laboured with whether and how and when to trust enough, to have faith enough to actually say how he feels. I'm really proud of how it came out in the end, and I'm very happy you guys responded to it the way you did.

Did you take any writing risks this year?

I don't know about risks, but I wrote 31 ficlets in pretty much a month, which came out to 26000 words, and that was no mean feat. And I actually still like most of them. Gave me a bit of writers' burn-out, I won't lie, but what a ride!

Do you have any fanfic goals for the new year?

I want to finish my Christmas fic. I would like to re-visit the Nothing Gold boys because I think there's meat on these bones and I always wanted to do a series of shorter fics that hang together. So maybe I can do something with that. But last year was so stressful at work and I don't see this year going any better (we have three big conferences this summer, so it's probably going to be So Much Worse). So, I'll be grateful for what I can accomplish, and accept that it might not be everything I want.

Most popular story of the year?

Nothing Gold Can Stay for sure.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:

Hm, I got a lot of lovely feedback this year, so I generally feel loved and appreciated by fandom. My May ficlets especially got a lot of responses here on tumblr, and I loved that dynamic interchange between writing and reading and commeting, especially with the others who did the challenge.

If I had to pick one underappreciated story, my Spare Parts 'verse January 29th fic The Stars Walk Backward didn't get a lot of eyeballs, but it's understandable given that it's a one-shot in a 'verse that not that many people are famliar with in the first place. It's a bit of a stepchild of a 'verse, but I love it, and I love this story for its unabashed sentimentality. It's very sweet and very calm and has a lot of 'we're back together and I don't want to fuck this up again' energy. I love re-visiting this fic if I need a quick pick-me-up, so. You know.

Most fun story to write:

Most of the ficlets were fun to write, and Tipping Point was somehow the opposite of Nothing Gold Can Stay in that it came out in a big rush over four days, like a writing tsunami. But my Christmas fic is also super fun to write, I just hope I can sustain the fun and actually finish it.

Most unintentionally telling story:

Probably Nothing Gold Can Stay, I suppose. Grief is really complicated, and it's difficult to come to terms with the fact that you can sort of stumble into pockets of it, and that you sometimes grieve things that are technically still there but have changed a lot. Essentially, the story is about a John who has to stop running away from his grief and turn around and face it, and a Sherlock who sees that if he wants to truly get John back, he has to face it with him.

Biggest disappointment:

With myself for being unable to finish the many, many, many fics I've stared but didn't remotely finish. But also gracious to myself for letting life happen.

Biggest surprise:

Not surprise but gratitude for the love and support of this fandom. You guys are awesome. I'm so grateful whenever someone tells me that something I wrote made them Feel Something(TM). It's the greatest compliment a writer can receive, and I feel truly blessed that I heard this a fair bit this year. I write because it makes me happy, and if people reading my fics experience something similar, then that makes me even happier. So thank you, fandom.

[voluptuarian]

honestly all the hotd writers did with alicent was shift her and aegon's story up one generation to her and her dad, changing otto into the parent we see manipulating his reluctant children into danger out of greed and ambition. Show alicent has her back against the wall already and is worsening a situation that was already bad, and her relationship with aegon is only a weak echo of her own story, a narrative aftershock. Book alicent's ruthless ambition borders on hubris and its she who decides to make her children pawns and aegon who is forced to maneuver and see things from the limited place she's backed him into. This changes the inner push for all the Greens' actions from a full blown insider actively plotting a usurpation from within the center of Targaryen power and dealing with the results of her own actions, to a reluctant middle man with her reigns held by a grey eminence, suffering the consequences of other people's scheming and able to consider herself ill used by all sides and genuinely tragic when hurt. Show aegon is left to be just sort of a putz, narratively and hierarchically unnecessary, just a physical reminder of his mother's lack of choice and an extension of her in basically every plot avenue. Instead of an agent for her own ambition alicent is the employee who gets yelled at, and aegon merely the dog she kicks in response. Idk I find that incredibly disappointing, especially considering how the original skews the familiar gender/parent dynamic and the show just puts it back. (Let's not even get into the decision that Criston Cole needed to have sympathetic reasons for planning a usurpation, or that they should hinge on being a minority or getting "manipulated" by a teenage girl.)

I think the fully "women's wrongs" unabashedly proud, greedy, evil-First-Lady-esque alicent giving birth to and then leading to their deaths all of her children for her own political gain, and working with a patriarchal framework to get herself power, then stripping it from the rightful heir and condemning her gender to nothing but indirect, manipulated power ever after in the process, hand-in-hand with her power hungry and ammoral "work husband," and aegon as the target and tool for her ambitions consumed by her and subsumed into her until he loses his mind, his body, and eventually his life as the result of her plans is just so much more interesting and satisfying.

Like post-Dance book alicent will have to live out the rest of her life knowing she sacrificed her family, cheated another woman, and burned the world to try and win and then only managed to not-lose, and we don't even know if she will feel remorse for her actions or just annoyance that things didn't turn out how she expected. Show alicent on the other hand will end up exactly as she started, with things "happening" to her and her behaving badly in response. I consider that a huge fucking downgrade and much less satisfying, and getting a toxic lesbian ship out of it is not enough to placate me.

[starzzach]

hi [peeks out from writer's block] for @c2-eh

read part 1 here and part 3 here! (or don't)

Carlos has an accident. Charles almost has one, too.

—

Oh Carlos is so dead.

Well. Charles hopes he already isn't already. It wouldn't work very well for his revenge agenda. He had a good race himself – great, really. At least until it was red-flagged because Carlos had crashed on the inside of Turn 9. It didn't bother Charles at first, though a twinge of worry had snuck through when the yellow flag went down and the red flag had gone up.

No, he'd just rolled his eyes and asked Xavi to keep him updated. Xavi didn't, at all, so when he jumped out of the car and asked for Carlos and nobody gave him Carlos, he thinks he had a pretty standard reaction.

Really, they should be happy he didn't stomp his feet and throw a tantrum. Carlos was – well. Carlos was. He was a lot of things. He is a lot of things. Charles frowns. And asks for Carlos again.

"Down in medical," a newer, recent hire tells him. Clearly no one told him not to listen to the drivers. Good for Charles, anyway. "They're making sure he's properly okay. He was pretty banged up."

Okay, now might be time to be a little worried. "What?" he demands. "Why did you not tell me this before?"

Charles isn't as friendly with the engineers as Carlos is. He likes to think he's a nice person. He's certainly had his moments, but everyone has. Nobody really questions him at Ferrari – nobody really questions him at all, really, except Carlos.

Carlos is always quick to, infuriatingly, talk him back down to Earth. So. He really can't afford for anything to happen to Carlos.

They don't let him go, though. Fred tells him to stay in the garage, warning him not to leave, and so Charles stays put like a prize pony, waiting for the debris to be cleared and the track to be deemed safe. He's distracted and stressed and everyone knows it.

The race is uneventful. He crosses the line in third, right where he'd started. The podium celebration is quiet – there's still not much word on Carlos. So, naturally, it's the first thing he does.

They part for him, like a sea. The reporters stay away from him, the drivers stay away from him. Tomorrow, or maybe even this evening, they will spin a story about how Charles hates Carlos for possibly ruining his race and Ferrari simply cannot handle the petty teammate drama.

Carlos cares about all that much more than Charles does, but Charles is always the one who ends up defending them. He argues with the nurse for a minute or two, increasing in volume. "I need to see him!" he shouts, unsure of why he's being so adamant. Perhaps he's a little bit more worried for Carlos than he wants to admit.

Andrea materialises at his side. "Charles," he says very quietly, hand on his arm. He pulls him to the side, and the nurse looks considerably relieved, breathing in big gulps of air. His scent must be worse than he realises. "Charles, did you get darker fireproofs this weekend?"

"What? No, of course not."

"Then tell me..." Andrea looks worried, properly worried. "Tell me that's not blood on your thighs."

"What?" He glances down and it's like– it's like looking at it acknowledges the pain he's in– the pain he's been in. "Fuck, what the fuck?"

"You need to see medical, too–"

Charles tries to shrug him off, vision blurring. "No– no, I'm fine– I need to– Carlos–"

Andrea fights him, and it's easy, too, given the cramps in his stomach. Fuck, this really can't be happening. "Let medical give you the OK," he says sternly, but there's concern in there, too. "You can see Carlos after."

Charles isn't an idiot. They've been having sex – lots of it, and the intention had been pretty clear. Pregnancy isn't very encouraged in athletes, much less male omega athletes. The stress from the race probably didn't help. He should have expected the miscarriage, really.

Tears sting in his eyes. He's not the most optimistic person, and he would have expected this, if he knew at all. "Please," he says, hoarse. "Let me see him first."

The thing is – in Ferrari, everyone is soft for Charles, and Andrea is no better. Irritated, he agrees, making Charles vow he'll get himself checked out. The nurse who had been pretending not to eavesdrop wordlessly guides him to the room he's been looking for.

"Idiot," is the first thing he says, so so so relieved. There's an IV in Carlos' arm but he's awake and safe. "Idiot, idiot, idiot."

Carlos laughs. Charles feels drunk on the sound of it. "Happy to see you too. I lost the wheel. How was the race?"

Charles climbs into the bed, trying very hard not to wince. Carlos notices and grills him until he pouts, but they talk. They talk and Charles pours his heart out and kisses Carlos until he forgets his own name (it might be the concussion) and then very quietly tells him he might have had a miscarriage.

Not the best way to go about it, but Carlos holds his hand through the checkup two hours later and they tell him no miscarriage, just some common bleeding. The baby is fine. He's almost two months along. He's due in late March. Carlos cries. Charles might have too.

"Wow," Carlos whispers after the tech wipes the gel off, the palm of his hand coming to rest on Charles' belly, slightly squishier than normal. The tech says something about a printout. "There's our baby in there. Our tiny baby."

Then the irrationality hits him and he whacks him with a pillow. He's going to hate being pregnant, how could he–

Oh, Carlos is so dead.

[davekat-sucks]

(Found this image on Twitter)

I really don't like the Omega kids. I take them as seriously as I take the alphasprites, they don't exist to me. Hearing you guys talk about these little mistakes feels like watching everyone talk about a hypothetical scenario or dream some guy had once... which is the Homestuck experience now.

I dislike them, but it's not just because their stories stem from terrible couples, it's because they're so over designed but there is no meaning to anything.

It's cute Tavros has a bow tie and that Harry has a bandana but those feel like little trinkets that should have been added on later after we get used to seeing them. Show me their personalities first before you overload a character with this much clothing. Yiffy is the worst of these. It's too much. For some reason Eridan feels like a simpler design than this avril lavigne clone. There is something less cohesive and more busy about these designs than the original cast. Maybe it's because it has too many different grays and blacks. She looks more like a vast error character than a Homestuck one.

Look at how simple the character designs start out as, and then they purposely make their own outfits that fit their interests and personalities. Dirk may be a bit of an exception here actually, he changes his clothes right after he is introduced. Which introduces him as anal.

There is meaning here. There is a purpose that the story shares throughout it's run. Look at Rose's dress it was made from the velvet pillow introduced when her mom one-upped her and Roxy's outfit here clearly being a reference to her mom's love of knitting. There is a reason Jade wears blue and John wears green even though that isn't their colors. Dave's shades are a gift from John. John is wearing a bootlegged slimer shirt. I'm not saying the Omega kids need every article of clothing to have a backstory, but if they wear this much clothing it doesn't tell me much.

Why does Yiffy wear cleats if she was hidden away from the world? Did she run around in a backyard like a dog or something? I don't even remember if that is her story or not, I forgot so much about her because I was more focused on how she was a child that Rose had behind her wife's back. They're overloaded with drama too.

To add to that. I haven't placed much thought in it but I don't know what the Omega kids color scheme is supposed to be. I assume the Beta kids colors come from basic web colors. If you invert the beta kid's colors you get the Alpha kids color scheme.

The Omega kids just feel scattered and unorganized. It makes them feel even more meaningless because they don't fit in. If that is the point then why not have five kids to really fuck with the system here? The writers should have really ran with the whole "we're flipping the script and subverting expectations" thing.

I also don't give a shit if this is nitpicky, I'm sure you guys can all see there is something off about the omega kids.

I agree about the accessories doesn't really show they are connected with the Beta Kid adults. If the bandana is suppose to be like a replacement to how Roxy wears a scarf, then let the boy wear a scarf and not a stupid gay bandana. You think that Kanaya, who is a fashionista herself, would be critical of what her daughter, Vrissy wears. And if you are saying she would never reprimand her daughter because she looks like her crush, then that brings up a worse implication that she really is grooming her to be like Vriska by enabling her bad habits. What confuses me is Tavvy's overshirt has the matching color of Gamzee, the one who MOLESTED HIM. You think after his death, he would never wear that color and be disgusted by any shade of purple that's within his sight. Unless him still wearing that purple vest now is still symbolizing he is still bound by Gamzee or can't move on after what he did to him.

But yeah, nothing about the Omega Kids designs makes sense. And I still am on the side that laughs at Yiffany looking more like Nostalgia Critic.

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

18 on the choose violence 😏

EDIT: As y'all may have guessed, my queue I was saving drafts of these in was running last night and I forgot to switch the time over so here's the real answer.

18 - It's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on: you want me to CHOOSE?!? You expect me to CHOOSE just ONE character from Sandman that the fandom sleeps on?!?!?!? Oh, jail for 1000 years - well let me spin the roulette wheel Rose and Jed.

ROSE. God I'm emotional about her. She's been through so much, the loss of her baby brother with a father who it's implied was not the nicest, lost her mother and her best friend in the same year, and she nearly destroyed the world but yknow what, she literally did nothing wrong here. She called Dream an asshole and totally got away with it. She's got gay hair and gayer friends (fellow bi!Rose truthers anyone???? Hello??? Someone else please discuss, queer people do all tend to flock together) and I hope she gets everything she wants.

I really want to explore the possibilities of a growing relationship with her and her immortal family sometime. Morpheus isn't just going to forget about her and Jed and him looking out for her baby brother is the only way I can see her kind of starting to warm up to him again. Like I WANT to see that weird tense but possibly loving relationship explored. Dream clearly respected her intelligence and wanted to give her more information (even if he was also using her to find the Corinthian which. Not cool).

(Also I think she'd go NUTS for the library of Dreams. Like she's a writer and suddenly she's seeing all the books never published?? Who wouldn't want to read them all?)

I have feelings about the parallels between her and Death. Plus I have a hc as some of my friends already know, that in one of Rose's low moments Despair finds her and something about the fact that this girl is family tugs at her. She has her function and her duties but she also has a sense of loyalty. So that could cause some seriously juicy potential internal conflict for her AND Rose honestly kind of needs an outlet for her bottled up grief and the weightof responsibility she feels. For Jed, for Lyta and her son...feel free to ask or dm me if you want to know more this post is already long enough xD

(And the fact that in a series where she's ONE OF THE MAIN FUCKING CHARACTERS for multiple episodes of this series she gets so much less attention ON HER OWN SELF - I'm talking art and fic overall PERIOD, let alone stuff where she gets any interiority of her own or her character taken seriously is just. I don't even know man)

jED. My precious baby boy my son. I want to give him a hug. I want to wrap him in a warm blanket and give him cocoa and as much popcorn as he wants. Dream's reaction to Jed was in fact channeling me. This kid has been through too much and he deserves to live a happier life with his sister, so thank God he's gonna get it.

(But also does anyone wanna talk to me about the fact that Jed is a possible candidate for Dream's successor when he's older and might be even more viable than MASSIVE COMIC SPOILER ALERT Daniel Hall and all the ways this could complicate things HELLO.)

Miranda Walker - either the gif search function is broken which isn't beyond the realm of possibility here, or I couldn't find one gif of her in this show. And I KNOW people have made them I just can't find one...sigh

But I really want her to get more attention because her story is so potentially fascinating even if she barely got any screen time. Like this girl is the granddaughter of Desire, that must've massively impacted her life. I want to know how she dealt with the relationship with her children's father going sour and him taking Jed away and her struggling to raise her kids.

And last but certainly not least drumroll please...UNITY. That's right we're giving the whole Walker-Kincaid family some love!!

HER. The queen the legend the moment.

Her story man...it gets me emotional every time. She could've had a life in the waking world. I really want to see more about what her dream life (which we know she experienced as real, with time passing and all, because of the things she said about it) was like. Even without Desire, how did she handle basically growing up in Wonderland surrounded by dreams? (I can't take credit for the Alice in Wonderland vibes that was @violetoftheendless 's great idea.) Did she make friends and a new found family there? Did she see signs she didn't understand at the time of dreams and nightmares falling into chaos and eventually leaving the realm in a slow trickle?

But also she's just such a genuinely lovely person. She took Rose into her heart without a second thought and was prepared to take Jed - I'm sure she didn't know how much more time she had but she knew she didn't have forever, and she wanted a family again and she'd lost her own parents long ago and never gotten to say goodbye...and the kicker is, unlike in the comic where she's basically on her deathbed already, she COULD have possibly lived a little longer. But she chose to sacrifice her new life to save Rose's. If this woman doesn't deserve the Spirit of Love label like I've seen in some truly beautiful meta from @windsweptinred I don't know who does. BUT ALSO she's not a perfect inhuman angel either, she is capable of being charmed by the Corinthian, which - looking around at the fandom, one can see she's not alone so I for one can't blame her too much, but also she met the king of dreams and nightmares and within less than 5 minutes called him a himbo to his face. She's beautifully human with icon behavior and Sandra James-Young deserves all the credit in the world for this role.

[williamaltman]

Ok so I've finally finished "Aristotle & Dante Dive into the Waters of the World" (a few days ago now).

I'm gonna start with: I got so fucking scared towards the end when they "broke up" and Dante didn't talk to him for weeks and left. God I think not many stories have ever made me feel like that. I think I actually have a bit of a trauma with one in particular that went like that and, actually followed up on not giving me a happy ending.

I was tired but I wasn't sure how I was gonna sleep with that in my mind, until Ari said he was going to Paris and so I knew I could have some hope.

Tbh I had a few more issues with this one than the first. I talked about it before but I didn't really like how it sort of pushed the idea that you HAD to come out to your friends even if you don't feel ready. I also felt like sometimes there wasn't enough Dante? I like Ari's friends and all, but these books are called Aristotle AND DANTE.

I also feel like, in a way, all the characters are a bit too articulate? Maybe too mature even? In the first book I didn't mind it as much cause it was just Ari and Dante themselves, plus their moms I guess, but here Gina and Susie are more relevant and there's Cassandra and Ari's father talks a lot more and there's more stuff like his mom arguing with other people, and it was just like... Well I guess it would be nice if most people were like that in real life, but they're really not...

That aside though, it was obviously still amazing. One thing I liked was Ari actually being gay and that term being used throughout? I usually don't mind when certain characters are mlm without their specific sexuality being stated, and ofc bi/gay couples are nice too, but I feel like sometimes in fiction it ends up being a bit more rare to have couples with two gay guys even though that's what's more common in real life.

I also love how fucking horny he was at the beginning lol. Like this actually felt realistic, and even though there's no smut or anything, it's not something that's just ignored or pushed aside.

I felt like Dante felt a bit more realistic in this book. He's moody so many times and I think his flaws are more visible and so it feel less like he's just there to be Ari's perfect manic pixie dream girl (though I'll say he's still one, affectionately).

Something I thought when I finished the first book was how cool it would probably be to see their parents reacting to their relationship. And that was indeed really cute. I think Dante's mom is my favorite of them all. And on the topic of the parents, Ari's dad's death? That was a complete shock to me. I wasn't expecting it at all. It came out of nowhere but it was honestly really interesting to have Ari and his mom deal with that grief, and that whole section is probably, in a weird way, one of my favorite parts of the book.

Another interesting thing was how much the AIDS crisis in the backdrop affected the book. I remembered when they flashed to that in the movie and I was confused at how random it seemed, but now I can kinda get why. I thought it was the best they could do by making it matter to the characters even though they probably wouldn't and shouldn't be actually affected. It's kinda funny to me how I decided to read this sometime close to when I watched Fellow Travelers that also featured that into the story, cause it's honestly not something I've thought about as much before.

Something that was really important was the closure between Ari and his brother. I'm not gonna say it bothered me exactly, because it was understandable, but it was just always kind of an ick for me that Ari cared so much about him knowing he was there because he killed someone in a hate crime. So the way their reunion went down was actually perfect for me and gave me a much needed relief just like it did for Ari. I feel like the writer probably felt the need to address it too because of the stuff people were saying about the first book due to this plot point, but even if that was why I still felt like the way things were handled felt natural. Their parents had already given up on him, he was never gonna accept Ari and I didn't want for Ari to stay caring about him by just not telling him or something.

I know the ending is a bit vague and doesn't like reeally explain every little thing, but the message felt clear enough to me, in that it was meant to tell us that things will be alright and that they're not just gonna let their love slip through their fingers or run away from it. Ari coming in with the wedding and honeymoon talk? Got me.

It still feels kinda weird that it's really over because it had honestly become so much of a habit to read these almost every day in bed. These books were probably the easiest thing for me to read and just flowed so naturally. I know people have already said that, but they really do feel like a way to celebrate life despite all the hardships in it and you can feel that love through the pages.

[klausbens]

i'm getting used to the idea that my opinions in this fandom will often be the opposite of whatever the general public seems to think, but i thought human nature and family of blood were just... okay. they're very... charming episodes, to be sure, the storyline is novel and the sets, cinematography, costumes and acting are great, i just feel like it left me feeling bitter more than it left me thinking ‘oh, that's a nice episode!’

this, of course, mostly resides in how martha was treated as a character. after two episodes which, more or less, seemed to highlight her qualities and actions and existence beside her feelings for the doctor, we're back at it. and i'm tired of martha being sandboxed in them. and i know that's the whole thing with her storyline, but it's so hurtful to witness over and over how she'll basically never be enough for the doctor, no matter the universe—mostly because so little of it rings true to me. i do not believe ten would never look at her twice. i do not believe there is no way he could fall for her. i do not believe he doesn't like her. he surely likes her enough to flirt with her, and the writers have such fun planting all those little innuendos in his dialogue toward (or regarding) her, but it's like they take some sort of perverse pleasure out of then shutting the door in her face and trying to make the audience believe that's rightful and that she has no reason to be hurt by it. it's exhausting.

martha does have the single most important role here, as she does in quite the number of episodes in her run as the companion. i always joke that the doctor would have regenerated 53 million times if it wasn't for martha, but that's actually not much of a joke. she's saved him so many times. and when, at the beginning, the doctor asks her whether she trusts him, what he really should've done is he should've told her “i trust you”, because the whole thing boiled down to martha having to fix his mess and the doctor 100% believing she would. at least he said something about everything being in her hands, which could be counted as implicit admission of trust, but yeah. the dialogue implying she is the one to have to trust that the doctor will come back to her, despite having to be the one to make him come back, is just...

i adore ten. he is the reason i started watching the show—well, tennant is—and i felt his absence so much during these two episodes that when john smith briefly spoke in the tenth doctor way of speaking my heart grew three sizes, but there's something deeply... off with his characterization at times. or maybe it isn't off, as such, just his flaws are highlighted a lot more than other doctors'—which is fine, per se, he's a 900+ old alien i don't want, need nor expect him to be perfect. it's just, coupled with the questionable general arc of this season with martha and him always in this wobbly, awkward spot between friendship and something else, and the way they seem to use martha as a cushion to fall back onto and punch when the doctor fucks up, it leaves a bad aftertaste in my mouth i guess. specifically because i think too much, and i often think about how so many people dislike martha for things that have so little to do with her and so much to do with the absence of rose, the faults of the doctor and the disservice the writers did to what could've been—and has been, if you look at her—an amazing character. a widely beloved one.

you know what, the episode would have been fine. john smith wasn't the doctor, he had this thing with the nurse or whatever, fine. part of the plot, i guess, was that of course he wouldn't have wanted to give humanity up, and what better reason not to want that than to feel love while trapped as a human? fine. but what i don't really get, and what makes me feel a little sick to my stomach actually, is the ending. where he goes back and talks to joan and asks her, or really, when you think about it, tries to manipulate her into coming with him. that's nothing new, the doctor is pretty manipulative and always has been, but he usually uses the allure of space-time travel and breathtaking sights and incredible adventures to basically kidnap his companions like some sort of old ass peter pan, and he's honest with it. he does genuinely think, every time, that what he'll offer the people he takes with him is so much better than whatever they might be thinking of doing with their lives that they will ultimately be happy they followed him. and they are, until they aren't, because that's the tragedy in doctor who for you, but here. here, he uses feelings. he uses joan's feelings for john and somehow promises her he's still capable of whatever john was, including falling for her. and why would he do that. that's just mean. to joan, to martha, hell, even to himself. i really have absolutely no clue what they were trying to do with this scene except, as i said, highlighting his flaws. because he knows damn well. he knows damn well that, even if he were to fall for her, she'd have to leave or die and it would break both of their hearts. that's the whole theme with him, isn't it? i thought it was. he's just experienced that with rose and he's keeping everyone at arms-length because he doesn't want it to happen again, and that's understandable. but then he goes and does this. i don't know. i simply don't know. there's also the whole thing where joan tells him she wants nothing to do with him, because she's in love with john—not some doctor—and he, the doctor, has caused so much harm choosing that specific place in space-time to hide. and the thing is, he's so creepy in that whole scene. when he speaks to her, the things he says, how he says them, how he looks at her when she calls him out. amazing acting, but there's something so dark about him in these episodes that i can't help but want to crawl out of my skin.

one might argue that he tried to get her to come with him because he remembered what john felt for her, or at least what happened between them. and that's further sustained by them hinting at him remembering what martha said to him about him being everything, and her loving him to bits. but that just makes it feel more gratuitously mean to everyone involved (so, ten as well), and steeps the two episodes in this... bitterness, which takes from the overall enjoyment. for me, at least.

there's also other things i disliked about the ep, like when in the video the doctor tells martha ‘you. don't make me leave you behind’ which kind of sounds like he was expecting he would? same way as he was expecting he'd hurt people because that's what humans do, which i agree with, but why underline the fact that he was potentially going to leave her? of course she would have stayed close in order to make him turn back to himself, i don't think that really needed saying. that's just one of the little jabs to martha the writers love to insert in scripts. thing is, i despise them! anyway, the post is long as it is, just—if there's one thing i loved (and it wasn't nearly enough to make up for the rest, but,), it was the way ten hugs martha after he tells her ‘thanks for looking after me’. with his eyes closed and that genuine, childlike smile. engulfing her completely. i so wish things had gone differently between them.

[blazethecheeto]

if they don't want us to see frost and mark's 'relationship' (it's in air quotes because whatever the fuck they have i refuse to call a relationship) as a joke, then they need to stop treating it like a joke in canon.

the time skips are appalling, genuinely, like how did we go from frost not giving a shit about this man to her crawling head over heels and crying over him and NO in between. there was never an in-between checkpoint for their storyline, it was all or nothing and i have no idea what's going on anymore, it's the INCONSISTENCY for me. i'm on 8x07 rn and the last time we saw mark, he made her vulnerable and believed this could be real, almost kissed her, then jumped out a fucking window.

she was mad for literally half a season.

let's just say i was a huge "frostblaine" fan. the last time i saw them was in 7x15 where they had their only serious moment in their whole story, only for it to be a lie. now, maybe i would want to see one episode where they AT LEAST reconcile and apologize?? instead of hearing about it after the fact?? nope, the next time we see them they're skydiving and singing karaoke and making out like their kiss wasn't a huge build-up for nothing. i'm so with caitlin on how quickly and weirdly their relationship progressed.

honestly, maybe i would be less hateful about this ship if they even TRIED to give them a good love story. it's clear the writers forget about mark (like they forget about frost and caitlin) until they realize, oh yeah, frost has no plot this season so we need to make her only lines per episode about her boyfriend who ditched her! it makes me mad that they reduced her character to that in s8. she can provide so much more than just the edgy 'teenager' that talks about her boyfriend all the time.

i haven't watched the rest of the season and i heard it does get better for her plot wise, but i also know she fucking dies so ofc they would do that.

there has been no serious moment in this whole 'on-again off again' bullshit. it's literally 'oh mark has abs!!!!! guys i have such a silly girly crush on him haha oh he's evil i'm gonna be pouty for half a season- oh wait he's back!!!' they've been treated as the comic relief couple. even in armageddon, caitlin wasn't even there at the fucking party but oh! right, we forgot frost! she's...oh yeah, she's having sex with mark in the bathroom bc that suits her character and the only thing we care about :333

they treat them like a joke, so how do they expect us not to see it as just that?