#i don't know! it's interesting to think about

[angelltheninth]

Arcane Characters Make Food for You

Pairing: Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Maddie, Ekko, Vander, Silco, Sevika, Viktor, Jayce, Mel x Fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, established relationship, domestic fluff, kissing, making food, teasing

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters

A/N: I already wrote this on my old blog but now is a good time to re-write it.

Jinx knows how to cook pretty well, surprisingly enough. Or maybe not so surprisingly given how she's always the one making things and experimenting. However that also means she might make some really weird meals.

It's something you'll have to deal with if you're with her and might have to develop a strong stomach. She already has it because she grew up in Zaun and ate a lot of different things. For you she wouldn't recommend some of them yet and she will try her best to make something that you'll like. And she won't get too offended if you don't eat her cooking right away.

"I made ya some breakfast, ta-da! It's a little sticky but don't worry, eat your fill and I'll clean up the mess later. Don't look at it like that, it might not look pretty but I promise ya it's so good. I could eat this every day. I hope I'll get to eat it together it with ya every day, sugar."

Vi doesn't know how to cook because she never had the opportunity to learn. The first few dishes are bad, like really bad, almost burn the toast and eggs type of bad but Vi she isn't the kind of person to give up. She'll keep trying until she gets it right.

There have been times where she did burn things and she won't let you eat it since it's not right. She wants you to have the best of the best, even if she didn't. Might get a little distracted when you're in the kitchen with her so she prefers to cook by herself even if you're there with her. Regardless of how many times she gets it wrong she at least wants to learn to cook your favorite.

"Yes, this is burned toast but this time it's not my fault, it's yours. Well you're the one who walked in here looking all cute and distracted me. One kiss is all it takes if it's from you, sweet stuff. Sit down and let me do this right and if you do you'll get something sweeter than this."

Caitlyn knows how to cook really well. She did grow up with people doing the cooking for her however she was curious and wanted to learn how to do it on her own. She's a very hand-on learner, now she can use some of her skills to make you happy.

She gets up really early anyways so she might as well make breakfast for the both of you. The first time she brings you breakfast in bed she thinks your reaction is cute, the way you stare at her, eyes wide and drooling over the food. For her it's not odd to have breakfast in bed. And if you stick with her you'll get used to her pampering you. Be sure to tell her how the food tastes.

"Good morning, darling, I brought you something. See, I didn't just brag about my cooking skills, this is me showing you I can cook. Showing off? Suppose I am a little bit, it's not my fault you didn't really think I would bring you breakfast in bed."

Maddie can cook some dishes but she can cook them well. Her skills aren't anything impressive but they don't need to be because she can get take out too. But she is more than happy to share what ever she makes with you.

She falls back on take out more often than she would like to admit. However not when she invites you over to her place, then she will put her best foot forward. A lot of that is because she wants to impress you hard, but it also gets her to work on her skills either way she wins. She keeps looking at you very intently while you take that first bite. Thankfully she doesn't seem to do a bad job if your smile is anything to go by.

"I'm not weird for watching you eat, it's called being smitten, gorgeous. Anything you do is interesting to me, you know that by now. This isn't empty flattery. I already got you to eat my cooking, I don't need to butter you up at this point."

Ekko isn't the best cook out there, he will be completely honest with you. While he does know the basic things you can't really expect anything fancy. If anything he focuses more on the dish being filling than tasty.

The thing about him cooking for the two of you is that he can only do it on his free time, which isn't a lot. Therefore he wants to make it a bonding activity. A cute date of sorts, mostly in the late evening when the rest of work is done. Sometimes he will try to surprise you but its hard when his living space isn't that big and everyone knows everything in the Firelights. The gesture counts.

"There wasn't much time so it's pretty simple, but at least it's your favorite, Firefly. No, I actually finished the new project, I had extra time to kill. Please, don't thank me! It seemed only right for me to make you something after you cheered me up this morning."

Vander knows how to cook really, really well. He kids to raise, and he was on his own for a very long time, he had to become a good cook. Plus he makes awesome drinks, being a good cook was a bonus skill for him.

He's always the first one to wake up and start the day in the Last Drop and he always makes breakfast for everyone. Not just breakfast but every meal, his kids need to eat a lot, there's always a little left over for later. Even if he feels a little sleepy himself he at least wants to put something on the table. It's the dad instincts in him. And husband instincts, hopefully.

"Don't ya even think about sneaking up on me right now, darlin'. I've got a pan full of sizzling hot oil in my hand, I don't want it all over us. Hugs are fine, I always love ya being close to me, but keep your hands to yourself. We both know ya get handsy in the morning."

Silco didn't know how to cook before he adopted Jinx, since then he's had to learn. It wasn't easy but now he does know a lot and he can impress the woman he's dating. Now when you stay over you can expect good for for your date, and good food when you wake up.

When the dating gets more serious he lets you help him cook, but until then he pretty much does it on his own. Jinx will go nowhere near the kitchen alone, not after that one explosion. He does have a list of recipes that he makes the most. And a few that he made up. Sometimes ingredients are hard to come by so he needs to improvise.

"Pass me the flour would you, love? This time I will follow the recipe, yes, the last time there was a bit too much sugar in there. I know you liked it but it's not the healthiest thing now is it? Fine, call me a worried dad, I know you think it's attractive."

Sevika isn't able too cook that well, she never was, she always liked others cooking for her though. However when you tease her about it she takes it as a challenge. And you know damn well that she doesn't back down from a challenge.

Curses a lot when she messes up, though you can bet that she's not gonna let food be the thing that beats her. When you walk into the kitchen it's a mess which will take a while to clean up. But at least she managed to make the dish this time and it's quite good. For her hard work you give her a very passionate kiss and that just makes her wanna work harder. That's the best reward she can ask for.

"One kiss for at that work, doll? I think I earned myself a little more than that, maybe you on the table instead of all this food. Yeah, I know it's gonna get cold, you're right. Can't let all this hard work go to waste, but when we're done we have to work all that food off."

Viktor doesn't have as much time to cook as he could if he worked a bit less. Not that his skills are award worthy but he can make a few things, at least in his opinion. Give his cooking a chance.

When he was a student in the academy he had to learn how to make quick meals and that is where most of his strength is. Just very simple dishes but he knows how to make them well. There are times when he himself forgets to eat so he makes sure he gets a good meal when he can. If you're part of that that's even better. Having you eat his cooking makes cooking more fun.

"If you think cooking this is so easy then you make it will you, beautiful? Ah so now you like it, I see how it is. I'm just kidding, I love making food for you when I can. But if you want to make it yourself please let me do a taste test first. I promise to be brutally honest, just like you are with me."

Jayce has absolutely no skills in the kitchen unless you need him to fix or build things in there. He knows this too and will admit it right away. Trust him he is much better in science than in cooking food.

That being said he will join you in the kitchen when you cook. He takes an interest in it because the way you cook makes his mouth water. When he learns about what your favorite food is he wants to lean how to cook it. However he does this in secret because he wants to surprise you. Sure enough he's able to get the biggest smile out of you when he presents you with your favorite meal.

"I learned it secretly, all for you, babe. Well I am quite good with my hands and I enjoy working, that was just another excuse to learn. Of course I don't have an ulterior motive for it! But if I did... and if it was kissing... would you kiss me for doing a good job?"

Mel is actually an amazing cook and knows a ton of recipes. Including your favorites of course. Do you really think she'd invite you over and offer you nothing to eat?

It's been a long time since she had to cook for anyone but herself but she's not bad at it at all. She has high standards when it comes to good food specifically because she holds herself to high standards. It doesn't matter how simple or complicated the meal is. When she invites you over and offers to make you food you better believe you're eating good that night. Not strictly food either.

"Beloved, slow down a little, the food isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We have all night. Every time I make food I do so because I want to enjoy a good meal, and you should too. And please be careful, I don't want you to choke, on the food that is."

[verysadlesbian]

Now that I have sat with my thoughts for a couple of days, I want to talk about some things:

There are too many people trying to defend Caitlyn's actions, so I have to say: NOTHING, and I mean absolutely nothing, justifies fascism. "Oh but she's grieving and blahblahblah" you know who else was grieving?! The mother of the kid Jayce killed in season 1. You know who else?! Vi and Powder that saw enforcers murder their parents, just like many other children from Zaun. Caitlyn destroyed her mother's legacy in the police brutality™️ operation, you understand how fucked up this is? Her mother's recording is saying "the people from Zaun deserve to breathe," and she did it anyways. If you sympathise with Piltover, you're either part of the problem or naïve enough to fall for fascist propaganda.

Ekko is the only real one. Not a single slightly evil bone in his body. Everything he does, he does for his people, not in a persuit of power, or revenge. He's genuinely good, so much so that he's willing to hang out with not only Heimerdinger, but also Jayce just so he could protect his community. He deserves so much better and I'll be heartbroken when he finds out that Vi was involved in Caitlyn's operation.

I don't know how Vi can forgive Caitlyn after what happened. I know I wouldn't. It just goes to show that you cannot trust that privileged people are going to be different just cause they were nice to you. Viktor found that out in season 1 and Vi is finding this out now.

Do you guys think the black rose is gonna pretend to be Mel?! I don't play LOL, but it is to my understanding that the black rose can make clones, so it'd be obvious that they're gonna take Mel's identity

Saw some people on twitter and tiktok (of course they were there) denying that jayvik has heavy romantic undertones by stating "they're friends! They're like brothers! Why everything has to be gay now?" and EVERYTHING HAS TO BE GAY CAUSE I SAID SO, NOW SHUT UP! But seriously though, I understand that to cishet viewers, their relationship might seem strictly platonic, 'cause they lack the eye that we, queer people, have for these things. And that's okay. Not everyone needs to understand the nuances of a homoerotic friendship. But in the same breath, they're quick to say that "Viktor was thinking about Sky, so obviously he's straight" and that pissed me off, cause: 1 - have you looked at him?; 2 - He feels responsible for her death (cause he was)! He's thinking about her because he feels GUILTY! that man was not interested in Sky whatsoever; 3 - it's so heteronormative to think that a man and a woman can't be friends, they're so adamant in denying jayvik cause "they're friends!" but they do the same fucking thing!; and finally 4 - HAVE YOU LOOKED AT HIM???

Anyone that sides with Piltover would probably be a zionist as well. I don't have to explain this.

The trio "Sevika, Jinx and Isha" is probably my favourite thing in Act 1, I just can't get enough of them.

[rongzhi]

actually maybe you know but what is cnets reaction to the us election results? i have weibo but i feel like im getting a pretty limited view

Hmm, the general reaction I've picked up on is: they think it's funny that he got elected. There's a very 吃瓜/watching with popcorn vibe to viewing U.S politics, but I don't think that there's a particular happy or sad feeling about it the way maybe other Western countries' people have reacted? Generally speaking, whether it's Trump or Harris, Republicans or Democrats, they both hate China and don't give a shit about Chinese people, which is the main concern of people in China.

I don't think they give a shit about the platform minutiae of it all; democrat or republican is largely the same to Zhang San and Li Si making 3000 yuan a month. Trump being president is in that sense inconsequential. In the meantime, I sense cnets find Trump very entertaining, so they tend to "like" him. I mean, he's funny to watch from afar, and because the China has developed largely self-sufficient industries, even with Trump's rhetoric on China, there is not a really an economic concern over on that side. Moreover, Trump in his first term, through his brashness, gave China a lot of opportunities to develop international relations with those countries that Trump alienated. He weakened the U.S grip on other nations, especially those developing ones, which found a friend in China instead. He was/is enormously racist and xenophobic toward China but his first presidency was actually considered good for China. For his aggressive talk, he is viewed as an an idiot that is easily influenced, and while yes, he can be unpredictable, at the end of the day, he's a "business president" and you can trust that money will always speak to him the loudest. As long as he's president, he will also embroil the U.S in domestic chaos, preoccupying the country and perhaps preventing us from starting new wars and stuff. (Biden is viewed as a war hawk; Harris would've continued his foreign policies)

Meanwhile, China will keeps doing China and the cnets, I guess I will say, largely have faith that the government will do what's best for China, and therefore best for them.

That's my read.

I will say, the main Chinese social media I use (where I actually get news, anyway) is douyin, which attracts a different user base than Weibo, I think. It's largely a video sharing site, where Weibo is more for posting text (deeper reflections, maybe?). I'd be interested to know what the Weibo reaction is, or at least, the reaction in the circles you or anyone else frequents!

[sterpernie]

Probably no one will read this, but I hope someone will. To my fellow Americans, it is absolutely fair to cut people off for beliefs you disagree with and may one day lead to you suffering harm, but if you have someone you love with these beliefs that you are thinking about cutting out of your life, please consider a few things first.

1. We are living in echo chambers, repeating our beliefs back at us. If we don't interact with people who believe differently, how are they ever going to hear a different perspective that is not completely twisted by the media they consume?

2. They often don't understand what they are asking for. There is a sizeable minority (1/3 of Americans per the NYT) that do not know Obamacare and the Affordable Care Act (ACA) are the same thing. They want to repeal Obamacare but keep the ACA. People want tariffs not realizing that they aren't the same as sanctions. They don't realize that China is not going to be paying the tariffs, they will. China is not going to eat the costs of the taxes (tariffs) levied against them for exporting to the US, China will just raise the prices of their goods and probably levy tariffs against US exports to China in retaliation like they did during Trump's last term, resulting in everything getting more expensive. It it pretty striking to look at the education demographics of who voted what party.

3. They don't get the whole story. There was an immigration bill that would give the Republicans basically everything they wanted in regard to the border. Trump killed it because he wanted immigration to remain an issue for him to run on. My dad, who listens exclusively to right wing media, heard nothing about it. He was shocked it didn't pass when he was told. When he hears about Palestinians, he only hears about them referred to as terrorists and Hamas, attacking Israel unprovoked. He has never heard about the Nakbas or about how terrible the conditions were in Gaza even prior to October 7th.

4. A scary amount of Americans have no damn clue how the US government works. They think, abortion protections were repealed under democrats, so it's their fault despite the extensive groundwork laid by Republicans ever since Roe v Wade was initially decided in the 1970s culminating in a Republican supermajority on the Supreme court that actually overturned the ruling. They think, why am I paying taxes to forgive someone else's student debt when I didn't go to college/payed off my college loans/worked my butt off for scholarships/made sacrifices so I could afford college/etc, not realizing that the debt forgiveness is really just making sure the programs that were already in place are actually implemented instead of allowing the loan servicers to continue milking these people for cash long after their debt should have been forgiven. They think the economy and how good/bad it's doing is solely up to the President despite the fact that the purse strings are held by Congress and the Federal Reserve, which controls interest rates, is an independent body not controlled by the President.

5. For the immigrants, they don't realize that all immigrants are persona non grata, not just people who came to the US illegally. My immigrant mother told me she votes for Trump because he's "gonna stop all the immigrants who are coming to take our jobs", not realizing that despite her naturalized citizenship, she will always be seen as one of those immigrants she talks about. She doesn't realize when he talks about chain migration, he's talking about the system she took advantage of to bring multiple members of her family to the US and allowed them much better quality of life than the relatives still in her home country. She thinks, because she lives in a large urban coastal area, that all parts of the US are just as accepting.

If you have a loved one with whom your only problem is politics (not abuse of any kind, but someone you love and care for), please consider staying in their lives. I am not saying make friends with people to try and change their beliefs, I am saying give your loved one a face to put to the "radical libs".

when people are like “oh so you’re just gonna judge someone for their political beliefs?” yes actually. I think someone’s values and opinions is a pretty reasonable thing to judge them for.

[cressidagrey]

It's a Love Story - Chapter 5

Summary:

Azriel's shadows find their master a wife.

Azriel would just really like his heart not to get broken again.

And Sky...well, she's just really surprised that that far too handsome male is interested in her at all.

Warning:

Rhys Bashing (as usual), I classified this as Azriel x OC, even when it't technically Azriel x Sellyn Drake (but we kinda know nothing about Sellyn Drake other than that she writes books so Sky is kinda an OC), Cassian is kinda a good guy for once, Azriel has a horrible time, as usual... Stuttering, toxic families (For once I do not mean the IC), Self-Esteem Issues, Secret Identity, Body Image Issues, Fat Shaming, People being utterly horrible.

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.

“Where’s Az?” Mor asked as Nesta and Cassian entered the dining room at the River House.

“Busy,” Cassian said with a shrug, as he pulled out the chair for his mate, greeting the rest of their family with a smile. 

Mor cocked her head, a small frown appearing on her face. "Busy?" she repeated, a note of curiosity in her voice. "What's he up to?"

Busy. That had been Azriel’s answer to nearly everything after Koshei. Busy.

Even quieter than usual. Keeping away from all of them…and Cassian still heard that one sentence echo in his head. Better me than you. Like somehow Cassians life was worth more than Azriel’s.

Azriel was just being noble and self-sacrificing as usual, right? Cassian knew that his brother didn't really think that way, didn't really believe that his life was worth less than anyone else's. But still, the words haunted him. He couldn't shake the feeling that somehow, somewhere, he had let Azriel down. That he hadn't been there when his brother had needed him the most.

Maybe he should have tried to talk to him...when it all went down… but then he hadn't realised what exactly was even going on, until Nesta had flatly laid it out for him one evening. Azriel had gotten over Mor only to fall in love with Elain...and that hadn't ended in his favour either.

Cassian grimaced just thinking about it. Azriel deserved to be happy. Azriel deserved a mate that loved him, a female that fucking adored him…and instead his brother had fallen not just for one, but two unavailable females. 

And Azriel hadn’t complained. Not once. He had never let it show.

He always kept his emotions hidden under that stoic mask of his, like he was afraid of letting anyone see how much he was hurting. Cassian knew that Azriel would never ask for help, that he would never admit that he needed someone to talk to. But that didn't mean that he didn't need it. 

Cassian just wished that he could find a way to get Azriel to open up, to let him in…that wouldn’t involve beating him to a bloody pulp. 

Azriel acted like everything was fine. Azriel acted like he didn't care. Cassian knew that it was a mask, knew that it wasn't the truth...but Azriel liked to pretend it was...and maybe it was better to let him pretend. 

It wasn't like he was hurting anybody with it, right? He was doing his work just as well as he always did...and if he wanted to spend his free time reading Sellyn Drake books, maybe they should just let him do that…maybe it made him feel better. 

"Maybe he's seeing his secret girlfriend," Cassian drawled.

Mor snorted at that suggestion. "Please," she said with a roll of her eyes. "As if Azriel would ever have time for a girlfriend, let alone a secret one."

"You would be surprised," Cassian muttered under his breath. Apparently Azriel had time for reading Sellyn Drake novels while locked into his room, after all. 

"What's that supposed to mean?" Mor wondered. "He has been...distant lately," she said with a pout.

Cassian could only stare at her. Mor couldn't be serious right now, could she?

Of course, Azriel was distant to her. Mor had fucking broken his heart and trampled on it to top it off. And Cassian had helped her with through the years. He probably owed Azriel an apology for that as well.

And still, Azriel hadn’t complained. Azriel hadn’t called them out. Azriel had taken it silently. Had even congratulated Mor when her Mating Bond with Emerie had snapped. Had been painfully polite, making painfully sure that he didn’t cross any lines, didn’t make Emerie uncomfortable in any way. 

"Just leave him be," Cassian said with a shrug. "He's reading Sellyn Drake novels, he'll be fine,” he waved her off. 

Rhys nearly spit his wine over the table and instead started coughing violently. "Azriel is reading Sellyn Drake novels?!" he asked Cassian with an incredious stare.

"Apparently he has trust in Nesta's taste of literature," Cassian answered easily.

Mor raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Sellyn Drake novels?" she repeated, eyeing Cassian like he had gone mad. "Since when does Azriel read those kinds of books? He's not exactly the...romantic type."

Or maybe there just never had been a single person that had appreciated that side of his brother. Who knew what Azriel actually was into. 

Elain and Mor weren’t similar in the slightest after all. 

Cassian shrugged. "Maybe he's expanding his horizons," he said with a grin. "Or maybe he just wants to see what the fuss is all about. After all, Sellyn Drake is...surprisingly good. Or so I've heard, anyway." He gave a sidelong glance to Nesta, who simply rolled her eyes at him.

Still, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rhys play absentmindedly with the stem of the wine glass. There was something there...between Rhys and Azriel that Cassian couldn't quite put his finger on. Some kind of tension...some kind of...something.

But lately, it had seemed like that tension had only been getting worse. Like they were both holding something back, like they were both waiting for the other shoe to drop. Cassian couldn't help wondering what would happen when that tension finally snapped.

***

"Winnowing or flying?" Azriel asked Sky as they stepped out into the icy early winter air.

"I...I can't...fly?" Sky answered haltingly, looking at him with these devastating blue eyes. They were beautiful. Not a light blue, not a teal, not bordering on violet…just beautiful near cobalt blue. She probably would match his siphons, he reflected weakly. 

"I'll fly, I'll carry you," he gave back with a chuckle. She stared at him like he was insane, her cheeks reddening.

"I...I...you...can...can't carry me. I am too...heavy," she mumbled. Now it was his turn to stare at her.

Azriel couldn't help but scoff at that. "Too heavy?" he repeated, shaking his head in disbelief. "I'm an Illyrian warrior,” he told her drily. “I could carry a full-grown male into battle if I had to,and I have dragged full-grown males off the battlefield…I can carry you.” 

Azriel couldn't quite believe what he was hearing. Was she...was she seriously trying to tell him that she was too heavy for him to carry? She just so reached the middle of his chest! She definitely wasn't thin...her body was covered with soft flesh and lush curves, every inch of it soft and inviting...but even if she weighed twice her weight, he would easily be able to carry her. She would probably weigh next to nothing to him.

And yet, he could sense the insecurity in her voice, the way she didn't quite believe that he could carry her.

He stepped closer to her, placing his hand gently under her chin and tilting her head up so that she was looking directly into his eyes. "You are beautiful," he said softly, his voice full of warmth and sincerity. "And I don't care how much you weigh, I can carry you. I want to carry you. Because you are mine and I will always protect you, no matter what."

Her breath hitched at that, and he could see the warmth spreading through her cheeks as her heart began to race. She looked up at him with those stunning blue eyes of hers, her lips parted slightly in surprise and wonder. "You...you really mean that?" she whispered, her voice soft and shaky. "You...you don't mind how big I am?"

Azriel chuckled softly, shaking his head. "No, sweetheart, I don't mind," he said gently. "I think you are absolutely perfect just the way you are. And if I have to carry you to prove it, then that is what I will do." And without another word, he scooped her up into his arms, cradling her against his chest as easily.

She squeaked as they shot up in the sky and then she laughed, the sound bright and beautiful

They soared through the sky together, the wind blowing through their hair and clothes as they flew. The City of Starlight sprawled out beneath them, a beautiful tapestry of color and light. Azriel held her close, feeling the warmth of her body against his, the sound of her heartbeat pulsing in rhythm with his own. He knew that he could never tire of this feeling, of having her in his arms like this.

Sky looked up at him with a smile, her eyes shining with happiness and excitement. "I love this," she breathed.

How very fitting it was for the female that called herself Sky to love flying.

"Good," Azriel said softly, his voice full of warmth. "Because we can do this anytime you want, sweetheart."

They soared higher and higher, until the city below them was nothing but a sparkling sea of lights. Azriel was in his element up here, his wings powerful and graceful as they sliced through the air. He could feel the wind whipping through his hair, the cold night air stinging his skin. But he didn't mind, not with her in his arms. In fact, he felt more alive than he had in months. Years, even.

He flew a loping circle over Velaris, towards the Lake House the shadows had purchased and he thanked them mentally for their foresight. He couldn't very well bring Sky home to the House of Wind...but here...he could take her. It was private and safe...and if the expression of her face was anything to go by, she loved it.

He angled his body towards the Lake House, gliding towards it with expert precision. As they approached, Azriel saw the soft glow of the lights in the windows, the gentle sway of the curtains in the breeze. The lake glittered in the moonlight, the surface of the water undisturbed and serene. It was the perfect place to bring her, a place that he felt she would love just as much as he did.

"You live here?" she wondered, wonder in her voice as she took in the sight.

Azriel felt a warm swell of pride in his chest as he landed smoothly on the deck of the house. "Yes," he said simply, his eyes fixed on her face, watching as she marveled at the house. "I wanted a private place," he admitted. "Somewhere quiet and peaceful, where I could escape from the chaos of my life for a little while.I haven't been there long though, it’s still a work in progress…" he warned her. More like 2 hours before he had met her. "But I love it."

He set her down gently, his hands lingering on her waist for a moment before he stepped back. "Come on," he said softly, holding out his hand to her. "Let me show you inside."

The shadows skittered inside as soon as he opened the door, like a bunch of little busybodies, rightening the curtains there, fluffing pillows on the couch...It seemed to amuse Sky though. "You must ne...never have to deal with a mes...messy kitchen," she teased him

Azriel chuckled at that. "No, the shadows don't like when things are out of place,”  he admitted.

It wasn't a lie. But then he didn't like it either. 

Like a moth pulled to the flame, Sky was pulled towards his bookcases, fingertips tripping over the spines as she hungrily read the titles.

Azriel suddenly hoped that the shadows had put something other than Sellyn Drake novels in the bookcase, because otherwise he was going to look like a fucking stalker.

He watched with a mix of amusement and apprehension as she examined the bookshelves, his heart pounding in his chest. *Please,* he silently pleaded to the shadows, *please tell me you didn't leave those Sellyn Drake novels on the shelf.* Because if she saw those, it would be disastrous.

The shadows seemed weirdly frozen in place.

"You read Sel...Sellyn Drake?" Sky asked him, sounding delighted and shocked at the same time.

Azriel groaned inwardly, feeling his face flush with embarrassment. "I...yes, I do," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "I...There is...I...I need to tell you something."

"Te...Tell me som...something?" Sky asked, turning towards him, these big beautiful eyes staring at him.

"I...It wasn't a coincidence that I was in that bar tonight," he told her, watching as she stared at him. "The shadows told me to go."

"The...The shad...shadows?" she asked him, looking utterly shocked.

"I...I told them...a few weeks ago...to...find me somebody that....that I could love...somebody that I could make happy. A wife," Azriel admitted. "You were the one they picked."

She stared at him, her mouth falling open slightly. Azriel braced himself for her reaction, not sure what to expect. Would she be angry? Scandalized? Horrified that he had sent his shadows to find him a wife?

She stared at him wide-eyed. "You...You as…asked yo…your sha..shadows to fi…find you a wi…wife?!" she asked him, repeating his words back at him.

He could feel his cheeks reddening but nodded nonetheless. "...are you angry?" he asked her weakly.

Sky stared at him for a moment, but then she shook her head. "No, No...no, I'm not," she repeated again, her voice trembling slightly. "I'm...I'm flat…flattered, actually...Though...though I am cu..curious what it…what it was about me that...made…made them pick me," she admitted.

For the first time in his life, his shadows talked to somebody other than Azriel. *We thought you would treat Master like you treat your cat,* the shadows told her brightly.

She blinked at the bunch of shadows that had gathered in front of her.

"You...You...You want me to...treat Az..Azriel like...like a cat?" she asked them incrediously.

Azriel spluttered, his cheeks burning with mortification. He hadn't expected the shadows to be so blunt, and the idea of her treating him like a cat was...well, it was absurd, to say the least. He wanted her to be his mate, his equal, not to treat him as if he were some kind of pet.

"No, no," he quickly interjected, trying to salvage the situation. "They...they don't mean it like that, Sky. The shadows have their own...unique way of looking at things. Please just...just forget they ever said that."

Sky fixed him with a look. "What do you mean?" she asked the shadows.

*You love your cat,* the shadows said quickly. *You buy him ridiculous overpriced Tuna, and you let him sleep in your bed and you scratch him behind the ears. You even knitted him a sweater!*

Azriel winced, feeling his embarrassment and mortification rising even further. 

"That...thats not important," he mumbled, feeling like he was on the verge of spontaneously combusting from embarrassment. "The shadows...they have a habit of exaggerating things. Just...please, don't take them too seriously. I'm not expecting you to treat me like a cat, I swear."

Sky looked at him, then at the Shadows, then at Azriel again. She seemed to be lost in thought, clearly trying to decipher what the shadows meant.

"You..You want your mas…master to be tre…treated...well?" Sky finally asked the shadows, her tone of voice serious. "You pick…picked me because I...be..because I was nice to my cat?" she asked them curiously.

*You are so kind,* the shadows said softly. And so pretty. And we knew you would treat Master well and wouldn't judge him.*

Sky blushed at the compliment.

Azriel felt a sense of relief wash over him as the conversation shifted away from the whole "cat" thing. He had to admit, the shadows were right. Sky had been nothing but kind and considerate towards him since they met, and he was grateful for that. Still, he couldn't help but feel a bit embarrassed by the whole situation.

"Look...I apologize for the shadows' behavior," he said to Sky, his voice soft. "They can be a bit...blunt, sometimes."

"I…I un…understand where they are com…coming from," she said nearly thoughtfully. "They just...want to see you hap…happy?" she said carefully and he nodded.

"Yes."

"Though they…they don't seem to have much of a sense of boun…boundaries," Sky said with a laugh. "You hid in my apartment didn't you?" she asked the shadows.

Azriel cringed as the shadows seemed to twirl in agreement. He had hoped that particular detail would have gone unnoticed, but he should have known better. Sky was too observant for her own good.

"Yes, they did," he admitted reluctantly. "I'm sorry about that. They...they have a tendency to go where they please."

Sky still mustered the shadows that were twitching in front of her

"I…I prom…promise to t…treat your ma…master well." Sky said seriously. "He's my mate."

Azriel felt his heart skip a beat at her words. The sound of that word coming from her lips made his knees weak.

He stepped forward, closing the distance between them and taking her hands in his. "And I promise to treat you well too," he swore fervently. 

"And I'll…I’ll even knit him a swea…sweater," Sky continued, looking at the shadows.. "I…I don't know if he likes Tu…tuna, but I'll…buy him some… sweets."

He couldn’t help but laugh at her words, feeling a surge of affection for her that was almost overwhelming. "Sky," he said softly, looking into her eyes. "You don't have to do any of that for me. Just being with you is more than I could ever ask for.But...if you are willing to knit me a sweater, I surely won't say no to it," he added with a laugh. "And maybe you could try scratching me behind the ears too, just in case the shadows are right."

He meant it as a joke, but there was a part of him that was secretly delighted by the idea of her spoiling and doting on him. Maybe, just maybe, the shadows were onto something after all.

"And...who knows, maybe I'll develop a taste for Tuna," he added, grinning playfully. "As long as it's the fancy kind, that is."

He kissed her forehead gently, holding her close for a moment longer before finally pulling away. "But Sky…you don’t have to do all of that…Just being with you is enough."

She smiled up at him, beautiful and blinding and he couldn't help but kiss her.

As his lips met hers, Azriel felt a wave of warmth and tenderness wash over him. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close as he deepened the kiss. In that moment, nothing else mattered. Not the shadows, not the world outside, nothing but her.

He broke the kiss reluctantly, resting his forehead against hers as he caught his breath. 

"You…You can absolutely sleep in my bed with me," she whispered. "Or I'll sleep in yours," she offered, a grin on her face... and that was all he needed to hear, as he picked her up again.

[kinardsevan]

i wrote a whole ass psychology breakdown (for the first time in FOREVER) about the break-up. enjoy (if you so choose):

so I've been reading a lot in relation to Tommy's speech during the break-up (and have actually gotten through the scene several times now, mostly as a creative reference for these fix-it fics. I think one of the first things that I've seen completely tossed aside (that bothers the shit out of me as someone with over a decade of therapy treatment and a psychology degree) is whatever trauma Tommy carries.

We know that there are issues with his dad. We know Lou's lore behind him is that he spent a lot of his childhood alone. We don't know anything in relation to his mom, but she may or may not be the cause of more trauma. We know that his way of dealing with abuse of authority is to shut down and follow the leader, which is likely a mix of his military time and growing up in his father's household (and when I say this, I mean from what we saw of him under Gerrard's command). This is a person who has put years into getting himself into some version of okay after all that he's endured, and we know he still generally does it on his own.

To that end, here, have my breakdown of the break up (roughly right about the time Buck says "I want you to move in with me"). (with pictures!)

Prior to the offer, we watch Tommy process through Evan's explanation about his relationship with Abby, things being transformative for him, etc. We have to bare in mind that this is where we also start to get what I've dubbed "starry-eyed Buck". He's so in the throes of what he's saying that I don't think he's really considering the connotation of his words. At the same time, Tommy doesn't know what lore Evan is about to drop him about this prior relationship. Remember that he now has to contend with the fact that they both have strong opinions on their relations toward Abby, and Tommy can't know if their feelings toward her as a person will be the same. I think Lou played this beautifully, appearing anxious and apprehensive as Tommy listened to Evan explain that Abby was transformative for him. Then he shifts into how Tommy has been transformative for him (which, he has, and we as the audience know this, but we understand it from a bigger POV than what Evan is saying with his words.)

There have been posts about Evan putting Tommy up on a pedestal throughout this speech (and really, possibly even sooner, but this is where we really get it expressed). Tommy tries to rectify this to a degree by countering "I wasn't always that way".

To that end, we then get Evan telling him "I know, and it just makes me admire you more." Tommy gives a bashful smile, clearly heartened by the statement, and even opening his mouth as though he's going to respond to it in some form. It would be interesting to know what was on Lou's mind of what (if anything) he thought would've been said there. Are there lines that were removed in this scene? Was 'I love you' actually going to come up? We can't really know. However, there's this part of me that thinks that Tommy thought that they were having a discussion on the depth of their relationship which would've possibly brought those 7 letters to the equation. Either way, this entire bit of facial acting is SO important, because it speaks volumes about how Tommy feels about how Evan feels about him.

From there we get the "I want you to move in with me, and this, THIS, THIS is such an important point for this ENTIRE scene. It's two seconds, but it holds SO much for the narrative. This man, who seems to be on the verge of ...something, clearly (who knows if I Love You was on his mind, or if it was just the fact that Evan was expressing how much he cares about him.) The reason this is all so important is THIS REACTION:

Now again, we don't know Tommy's trauma, but the joy literally drops out of his expression and shifts to panic. Now, speaking solely from the standpoint that these two haven't even said "I love you" yet, his boyfriend steamrolled over him from a possible declaration of love straight to moving in together without discussing semantics. Further, it's not even "I want to live together", it's "move in with me". We don't know much about Tommy's house (because these shitheads haven't built him a set yet), but we know that he has a HOUSE. With a GARAGE. Buck lives in a LOFT. Regardless of how much of an asshole this makes me sound like, it's crawling with red flags. It comes across as "fit more into my life" instead of "lets do this thing together". Further, if that's not bad enough, mention of getting engaged and married is thrown at Tommy as well, which holds two major bits of information: One, these are on Evan's mind. We've NEVER heard him talk about getting engaged or married to anyone. This speaks to the importance of their relationship to him, but the lack of I Love You also speaks on his own trauma. If we truly are getting the rom-com trope, at some point there's likely to be a conversation about why he lept over it (*cough* Taylor, his parents *cough cough*). Meanwhile, as he's continued in his starry-eyed speech, this is what Tommy is giving:

Now for those who don't know how to spot it, this my friends is a PANIC RESPONSE. The shift forward, the move to get up, the literal deep breath. He's having a panic attack. Now, obviously we don't know what brought this on, but god-willing, we WILL get the answers.

Now, to his own point, Tommy doesn't just straight up pop Evan's pink bubble. He does express that it's a sweet sentiment, but that it's a bad idea. To which point we get:

"Evan, that is so sweet. But I can't move in with you." "And why not?" Because. I know how this ends." "Uh, what-what's that supposed to mean?"

At which point, we clearly get the qualities about Evan that Tommy likes. "Incredible guy. Big-hearted. Hot as hell. Impulsive." I don't feel that the expression here matters as much as his tone of voice, because we can see on his face that he's expressing these qualities from a good place. The next point of reference isn't until Tommy's next line, when he says that Evan's reaction is out of things being "new and exciting".

To that end, the way Evan is talking to him makes this statement valid. He's not talking to Tommy like they've been together for six months and have built a relationship that should be moving in this direction. (For the tenth time I will repeat, he couldn't even dignify whether he was in love with Tommy when Josh asked).

Furthermore, I think when you consider this part of the scene, you also have to consider the strain in Tommy's voice. Something about those concepts (living together, getting engaged, married) is terrifying. It definitely gives the impression that Tommy has been faced with some version of this before and he got burned. Why is this important? Because of this:

"I'm saying no matter how bad I want it to be, I'm not your last." Those 9 words are important on their own, but when you couple them with the expression on Tommy's face and what we've just seen him go through, there's a clear point to the fact that he's been through this before. I also think that there can't be enough importance placed on the way he intonates "how bad". This is not a man saying no because he doesn't want to. He's backpedaling because he's sure that he's going to get burned. We get this point further driven home with this exchange:

"I'm your first." "But hey, they can be the same thing." "But, they usually aren't."

See this doesn't read to me as someone who's scared because he knows Evan has never been with another man. They're both fully grown adults who have had multiple relationships. What this speaks to me (now) as, is someone who has let someone convince him before that he would be their forever, that they were all in, and then broke him. When you include his childhood trauma and whatever abandonment issues it's left him with in correlation with all of this, yes, it's still an extremely biphobic set of lines. But in the context of what he's expressing and why, it's not about telling Evan he needs more experience, it's about telling him that he doesn't believe that he'll want to stay settled down with him six months, a year, etc., down the road. And THAT my friends, is abandonment issues 101. "Everyone else has left, so it doesn't matter that I'm in love with you, because you will leave too, and I need to protect myself from that."

Following that, we get this: "if I were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it, but you'd end up breaking my heart."

This line is SO important, right next to Evan's exchange with Josh about his relationship with Tommy. Why? Because even though neither of them have said it, it spells out that these two are in fact in love with each other, even if they haven't said it.

"I don't think I could deal with that." Tommy is fucking GONE on him. He's expressing that if he gave himself fully over to what Evan's referring to, losing him would break him. Again, we don't have the full picture on his trauma, but we know there's a mountain there. It's also worth noting again, that the intonation he uses in these statements clearly come across as someone trying to reign in their emotions and keep it together. That says to me that we're dangeously close to touching his trauma.

I don't feel like I have to include the final few bits of the scene in gifs because they're all over the site now, but the next line gives over the fact that he hasn't really been open about his trauma to Evan, given that his immediate response to expressing all of this is "I should go". This kind of reaction is generally brought on as not being accepted for having certain feelings. Now, obviously Evan is caught off guard by the entire interaction, the same way Tommy was (but for different reasons), so we have to take all of that into account when we think about the fact that instead of countering Tommy's logic, he asks instead if Tommy is breaking up with him.

Body language is also so important here for Tommy. His shoulders are hunched in, we see him wipe his face (meaning there are likely tears), and when he turns around, he's so caught up in whatever wave has taken him over that it takes Evan asking him for Tommy to state "yeah, I guess I did" about breaking up. Further, there's the fact that he states that he didn't see the break-up coming, which goes back to my point at the top of this post, that he clearly thought the conversation was going one direction, and instead it goes the other. From this point, we have Evan reeling, because he wants to create more of a life with Tommy, while Tommy is shutting down because of whatever is holding him back.

Finally, as I've referenced before, we get this line:

"Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true."

That line makes zero sense out of context, but in consideration of someone trying to lighten the weight they're carrying (which you can literally see by the way he has his hand on his neck, which you generally only see people do as a stress response). You can also double entendre this statement that getting to be with Evan was too good to be true. We get that little inhale with the smile, and I swear to God the only time I've seen that kind of reaction is right before someone cracks.

And then in closing, we get the "I'll see you 'round, Buck," our closing gut punch. Evan is still reeling, clearly. His face is very "what the hell just happened". Tommy is clearly not okay. This entire scene has opened an entire can of worms on them without a whole lot of answers.

Now, I've owned the fact that basically from the end of 806, I felt like this had to be a swerve, and that there has to be more to the story. I've also pretty much owned the fact that if the writers did actually just do this for kicks and don't have a resolution for it, I may not keep watching. However, in the context of the fact that, for the moment, I'm choosing to put hope in some kind of resolution, these lines make so much more sense. It is worth noting though, most people in the fandom, let alone the general audience, aren't going to psychologically break this shit down line-by-line. They're not going to lean into whatever trauma Tommy has that we don't know about yet. Its why the internet has been a mess since Thursday night. But it's also why I talk about how, when this situation gets resolved (because right now I refuse to say if), Buck has to give up the loft and give more of himself. Tommy, by the nature of the show, has fully immersed himself in Evan's life, but we haven't seen or heard mention of Evan doing so at all in Tommy's life. That doesn't mean he hasn't, but we haven't gotten any version of that. So when I say Evan needs to give things up... it's about matching what he's asking Tommy to give up. Because at the end of the day, when this circles back around, he's effectively going to be asking Tommy to trust that he won't break his heart like others have, and when you have a lifetime of abandonment issues and have learned to cope by being hyper-independent and alone, moving in the opposite direction is more terrifying than anything else. ESPECIALLY when you love that person, which we saw Tommy spell out. Evan has the ability to break him (and probably already is via this cut-off-at-the-quick break up.)

So, I'm really gonna need these shit heads to figure out that they'll be more miserable apart than they'd ever be together.

That's all. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

[all-purpose-dish-soap]

62 / 3.4k / final part of shark mermen Gaz and Soap with human!reader

kinktober keywords: dubcon, anal, double penetration, monster mermen, monsterfucking, teratophilia, hypnosis/hypnokink, praise

nsfw ⬇

Soap has his filthy way with you, pushing into you with the longest, most agonizingly slow strokes you can imagine. You swear you nearly peak every time he bottoms out. And he might as well be edging you every time he pulls drags himself back. You can't pretend like you don't want every second of it, though--your  walls grip him fervently.

Soap slowly loses himself to his instincts. He ruts into you harder and faster--just like you're crying out for him to do, you register dimly--until he snarls and pulls out. You whine in protest until something warm and wet spurts across your back, and you sigh contentedly in the knowledge that you brought him satisfaction.

Just as you're catching your breath, though, he chuckles and repositions himself so his second cock is pressing up against your swollen core. "Don't know about you, hen, but I've got plenty more time and energy to spend."

"Ah--!" you gasp out as he pushes the second, still-throbbing head into you. You don't think you're capable of going any longer. But even as you collapse with your forearms against the gravel, hands balled into fists, you'd like nothing more than for him to keep using you. You're painfully aware this time that you're having that thought and enjoying this little game all on your own. No hypnotic suggestion necessary. Maybe Gaz did ease you into it, but you knew what would happen to you if you let them keep touching you. You knew, and you let it happen.

He keeps pounding, huge hands groping up and down your form. Just as he seems ease up into something resembling a caress, he clamps one hand around the back of your neck, slides his other hand to your ass, and squeezes with a throaty laugh.

You feel his fingertip prodding at your asshole. "Hey!" you squeak, trying to wiggle forward.

It only makes Soap chuckle. "Hey?"

"You're not supposed to touch that!"

"Really now."

"Aye," you tell him, mimicking his accent.

Soap's hips snap in an especially rough thrust.

"Ah!"

"You sure you want to sass me right now?"

You huff as he continues rubbing little circles around the tighter hole. "Just... watch it."

Soap laughs and eases the very tip of his claw into the rim. His hips don't slow down either, fucking another harsh breath out of you. "Or what?"

You swallow, gripping the gravel under your palms. "I don't think I can hold any more," you plead.

Gaz doesn't say anything, but his expression shifts with interest. Soap pauses for a moment. Gaz speaks first. "But you'll try, won't you?"

You feel dizzy again. His voice drifts into parts of your brain you never thought possible. You love it and you hate it. Soap uses his grip on your neck to angle your upper body up and your hips down. At that angle, his tip grinds even harder into your most sensitive inner cluster of nerves.

You cry out, bucking your hips back into the finger pressing into your ass. "Yes!"

Soap smirks. "There's a good human."

You pant, trying to ease your legs further apart. But grinding any lower into the gravel hurts your knees, and Soap's hand on your neck keeps you from bending forward and slumping to the ground.

The pace of his strokes slows as he works his finger in a little more. It's already slippery with your own arousal, Soap’s spit, and Gaz's spend covering the crux of your thighs. You’re a mess. Even so, you're wary of his claw--it's meant to rip flesh--but as long as he’s controlling himself, it's fairly blunt. You hate how easily you take in his thumb up to the first knuckle despite its size. Gaz watches with a look on his face that only makes you feel more lightheaded.

Soon enough, Soap's thumb is sheathed inside you to the proverbial hilt. He releases his hold on your neck and uses your ass to maneuver you instead.

He stares down at both your openings with a crooked smirk. "Damn near perfect sex toy, isn't she?" he says idly. "Two holes lined right up."

"Fuck you," you groan out, rutting backward against him. Your body is on fire despite the cool ocean mist falling over you and the wind pushing down along the cliffsides around you. You're so close.

Soap chuckles. "You wanna get rough, hen?"

"Nnh..."

Gaz takes hold of your chin and turns your gaze toward him. "Be honest. You get what you ask for when you don’t use your words."

His face is close. You feel yours heat up.

Behind you, Soap groans. "Clenching on me," he mutters. His pace slows before your tightness can overwhelm him further. He slides his thumb back and forth.

You blink up at Gaz with hazy eyes. "I want to cum," you tell him.

"Yeah?" His thumb strokes your chin. "You seemed so hesitant not long ago. What changed?"

"I... You..."

"Mmhm?" Gaz's thumb brushes your lower lip. "You’re communicating so well. Don't stop now."

"You tricked me. You lied."

"Did I? What did I lie about?"

"You hypnotized me," you gasp out. Your voice shakes as Soap punches in and out of you. "And then you said-- ah-- you said I wanted it anyway."

"Hypnosis isn't magic. I put a few suggestions into your head. You reacted on your own."

You try to bite back a cry of pleasure. It comes out a sob. Soap pushes himself to go faster again, finally, feeling you tighten up as you near your limit.

"You-- you made me-- turned me into--" Your voice breaks as the tension inside you snaps. You clamp down hard on Soap’s thumb and his cock. Your body rolls uncontrollably. Milking him. It feels so good, so full, you could cry.

"Good job," Gaz coos. "You feel a little better when you stop thinking too hard, don't you?"

You sag, panting, and half-collapse into his lap.

Gaz catches you easily before you can slump to the ground. "That's right," he murmurs, letting you rest your head against his chest.

Soap pounds you a few more times and lets out a long, hissing groan as he finishes. He grips your hips and pumps you up and down his shaft to finish himself off. Then, finally, he leans forward, hands on either side of you, and sighs in satisfaction. His teeth graze your shoulder like he wants to sink them in opposite where Gaz’s bite mars you, but the only marks his mouth leaves are warm, wet kisses. As much as lathes of his tongue can be called kisses.

They let you rest for a blessed moment. Then Gaz's hands wrap around your middle and ease you into his lap, chest to chest.

As he does, Soap slides out of your guts. You hiccup, feeling Gaz's two cocks--both hard again, fuck--lean up against your stomach. You press your palms to his chest. Your forehead, too. You don't dare meet his eyes for fear he'll remold your will again.

Gaz's chest rumbles with a laugh. It's a low sound with an undertone like a growl. "You're tired, aren't you?"

"Yeah. Obviously."

He strokes over your hair and down your spine. "And still running your mouth."

"Hmph."

It makes him chuckle. "Don't be stubborn about it," he murmurs. "I'm not done with you yet."

"But I..." You trail off as he lifts you into the air and positions you over both erections. You stare down at them, biting your bottom lip. Your brain is so sluggish after that climax. You feel like a toy and you still don't think you hate it as much as you should.

"You can take it," he murmurs, guiding your hands to rest on his shoulders. "You'll take it just fine, yeah?"

He lowers you until you feel his tip nudge against your core. You shift instinctively to put your legs forward and rest your feet on either side of him.

"Good," he says. "Now, nice and slow."

He eases you down onto one shaft with slow, firm movement until he bottoms out.

"Ah..." Your legs twitch and you lean back, feeling that incredible stretch again. His other cock rests against your stomach, your clit, stimulating you even more with little grinding jolts.

"How's that feel?" he murmurs, taking a moment to steady you.

You stare at him with half-lidded eyes and a slack mouth. You hardly register he's speaking to you, much less that he's expecting a response.

Gaz chuckles and rolls his hips up. "Still running that mouth?" He murmurs with a touch of amusement. "Or have I finally shut it?"

"M-More, please," you manage.

He groans and grinds up into you. "Good answer."

He slides you back up, his flared tip stretching your entrance again almost to the point of popping out. Then he lets you sink all the way down again.

Up, down. You let your hands rest on his, wrapped securely around your waist, as he handles you like a doll. You let your head loll back again, exposing the column of your throat. You've been bit and tossed around and come on and in and fucked every which way already. What's one more bite? One more round?

His shaft pushes up against the front of your tight walls. You let out a drunken sigh, almost a laugh. You're ruined for human men. You're sure of it.

Every noise that leaves your mouth is like honey. Gaz's lips find your neck as his tongue traces over the mark Soap left. You left him have his way with you, and he wants to make it worth your while. He's more indulgent, more curious than Soap is. He notices when your moans quiet and you roll your hips as if seeking satisfaction just beyond your reach. "What's wrong?"

"Ugh." You scowl when he slows. You're still tight as hell, especially with how swollen your climax made you, but there's something you want more of. You reach down and begin to play with yourself, sighing at the feeling, but it doesn't help you the way you want.

His eyes lock onto the way you rub yourself. Very interesting. "Need something?"

"Could you, um... could you, like. Well." You look to the side. "Could you put it in my ass again?"

"That's a bold request. You liked Soap's finger, then."

You shrug.

Gaz chuckles and leans closer. "You're a mess," he murmurs.

You bite your lip as he eases you up and off his cock. Then he rests it--the same one, slick and dark--against your ass. Soap's hands come to his aid and spread you out from behind. You squeak in surprise.

Soap's voice is behind you. "Dirty girl. What would your kind think of you now?"

You don't dignify that jab with an answer.

Instead, you focus on steadying your breath and relaxing your body as Soap drags his fingers down through your slit to collect a sheen of slick. He slides one finger into your ass. Then two. Then scissors them, loosening you up.

You rock your hips back in little motions that drive him deeper. It sends pleasurable waves shooting down your whole body. You need more. "Oh, that feels good."

"Yeah?" Soap murmurs. "You want a little bit more?"

"Mmm!"

Soap hums. "What was that? I didn't hear you."

"Yes!" You buck your hips harder. "Please!"

Soap laughs. He replaces his prodding fingers with Gaz's tip once again. You close your eyes as his tip opens you up. There's a pinch as he eases up into the tight muscle right at your opening. Suddenly he feels way, way bigger. Keeping careful hold on you, Gaz eases you down a fraction of an inch at a time. You both know this hole isn't as forgiving. But God, does the squeeze feel good.

He sees your brows knit and pauses before he lowers you further. "Does this hurt?"

"I can take it."

"I know you can. I'm asking if it hurts."

"I said I can take it," you mutter. "I'm in control of my own actions. You said so. I want it all the way in."

"And I'm taking my time to make sure I don't hurt you. You're lucky I'm in a generous mood."

He lowers you a little more. Your core twitches around nothing. "Ah... It hurts a little, but it feels good."

"You can take more, huh?" he murmurs. "You're strong stuff, yeah?"

"Nnh... yeah..."

The way he presses into you stretches your sensitive spot from the back. Your core drools. A needy, wanton sound escapes your throat, and your hands latch onto his shoulders again. "Right there. Fuck."

He likes hearing you let yourself go. He likes that it's for him. "Yeah? That feels good?"

He lifts you up again and slides you back down carefully. His second cock catches on your core, the head grinding past your sensitive nub before it glides past and bounces to your stomach again.

Your back arches in his hands. You need more.

Gaz eyes you arching and squirming in his hold. It’s really something. "You're eager. Need satisfaction that bad?"

You nod frantically. Your hand shoots back down to your clit. You roll and rub frantically for more stimulation. You don't notice the way he watches you do it, even when you try to slide your fingers into your slit. Your clumsy fingertips slip around your drooling hole, but you can't reach that spot inside you he's stretching. It feels so good, radiating all the way to your toes. It would feel so much better if you could just…

There's a strangled noise from behind you. Soap watches you intently.

Gaz smirks at him. "You like the show?"

"Aye."

Gaz laughs. Your desperation is interesting all on its own. Maybe he should've teased you a little more instead of selfishly getting himself off first. Maybe he still could--

That thought comes to a screeching halt when your fingers ghost over his cock, the one still pressed lazily against your stomach. He growls but doesn't slow his pace. "Watch it," he warns.

Driven to desperation, you take it again in your hand again and guide it toward your pussy. You need it in you. You need everything he has to offer.

Soap watches with wide eyes. "Oh, she's playing dirty, isn't she?"

Gaz’s cock slides away from your too-tight hole again and grinds up your slit and against your nub instead. It feels good, but still, you groan in frustration as he sinks your ass all the way down onto his other cock. Then back up. You try again. "Just let me--"

"You're too damned impatient."

Soap chuckles. "I don't know, I kind of like it. Slip it in, human, see if it really pisses him off."

"No," Gaz retorts. "You're gonna hurt yourself like that. Stop it."

"Just the tip," you plead.

Gaz grits his teeth. You're really going to be his undoing, aren't you?

"Soap," he barks, "hold her."

Soap immediately does as instructed. He grabs your waist. He's much less gentle than Gaz, who releases your upper half to Soap's control. Gas stays in you, but grabs your hips to angle your legs open and up. He glares at you. Then he prods at your core with his thumb, smearing the slick dripping out of you all over your entrance. Then he thumps it with his other tip. Your breath hitches. You buck your hips up impatiently. The motion pushes only the very tip inside. Gaz knew it would happen, but still. His chest catches with a rough, strained sound. "Stop moving before you make me hurt you."

You bite your lip. "You can hurt me a little."

His eyes darken. He pulls your hips forward just enough to stretch you all the way around his tip. Fine. If you want to make things harder on yourself, he'll play along.

You suck in a breath. That's a lot of dick. Maybe too much dick. But hell, if you're already ruined for men your own species, you might as well go all the way. You gaze down at his shaft disappearing into you with a vacant smile on your lips. You really are the perfect sex toy for this. Both holes are positioned perfectly to take him.

Your expression and your words only stoke the fire in Gaz’s gut. There's a very specific feeling he has to tamp down when he sees what he does to you. A sense of primal, territorial satisfaction. He wants to devour you whole. The temptation is unspeakable.

He does his best to calm his nerves before he speaks, but his voice is tight. "Doing alright, love?"

"Better than alright," you purr. His member is pushing up against your sensitive spot, just like you wanted. Every subtle shift sends pleasure throbbing up your walls. You pulse and tighten up as if to pull him deeper in.

"That's good," Gaz breathes. "Just the tip."

You sigh happily as he pumps his hips into you just enough to keep fucking your ass. But he doesn't get any deeper into your core. You frown, trying to prop yourself up with your elbows against Soap's chest to see get a better view of where you're joined. Soap easily pulls you back against him. He cups one of his big hands around your breasts and starts squeezing and toying with it crudely. You huff and roll your hips.

Gaz hardly notices you squirming. You feel too good trying to take him in. You're close to doing it, too. The way your walls are tightening and pulsating around him. He narrows his eyes at your blissed out expression. "You're... are you close? From just this?"

You nod.

Soap laughs. "You made her too greedy."

Gaz pushes into you a little harder, letting himself slip further into both holes. You moan like the stretch is the best thing you've ever felt. It's so slow. Exquisite. The rub of him inside you lights your nerve endings up like nothing else. The pace he sets has you seeing stars.

By the time he seats himself all the way inside you--to the hilt of both members--you're cumming with a weak keen, arching up between him and Soap, just as the sun is beginning to slip below the horizon.

That primal satisfaction radiates from his chest to the end of his tail in heavy, powerful waves. You've taken him so well. He reaches out and tugs your chin up to admire your expression.

"There you go," he murmurs. "You did good. Just like I asked."

You can hardly keep your eyes open. But his voice makes you feel warm despite the air blowing cold across your damp body. "Mm?"

Your awareness is fuzzy as Gaz keeps fucking you to completion and fills you up. At some point, you must fall asleep, because the next thing you know, you're cradled against a warm, broad chest and shuffled into the water. You loop your arms around his neck, eyes still closed, and hold on. But instead of taking you underwater again, he keeps to the surface.

Sometime later, you're stumbling back into your own bed, salt in your hair and your body exhausted beyond imagining. The next morning, when you wake up, you stare at the ceiling for 45 minutes, wondering if it all could've possibly happened. You vaguely remember the day before, but the memory feels far off and dreamlike. Until you take a shower and notice the myriad of bites on your shoulders and thighs and lips. You're bruised up pretty badly, actually.

You try to return to your normal life, but what you did itches at the back of your mind. Sometimes you still hear Gaz’s voice, his suggestions buried deep in your subconscious like a venomous barb. You don't sleep well. Your dreams leave you panting and sweating and no matter how much you try to take care of your constant sexual cravings by yourself, they never quite go away.

Not until you return to the docks one night.

You aren't sure what compels you to return. A memory. A compulsion. A siren’s call. But your feet steer you there without a thought, and the moment you step on the docks, two mermen are already there, waiting.

...

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / [part 5]

more Gaz / more Soap / more mer au / masterlist

thanks y'all! o(*￣▽￣*)o

[tealleaves4]

Can everyone just put their thinking caps on for a moment and open their minds a little?This isn't an attack AT ALL, this is a plea to everyone to start THINKING CRITICALLY and genuinely ASKING QUESTIONS about why society is collapsing. So many straight white cis dudes (and dudes in general) just actually HATE women and minorities and REFUSE to let them have any control because they think it means less control and power for them and frankly, they've just been RAISED to think competitively of literally everyone around them, including other men. Why would they want to give up the status quo when it still benefits them greatly in certain aspects? And before people start crying WOKE or SNOWFLAKE, etc. just STOP and LISTEN for a sec. NO, I'm not talking about all men, I'm talking about hateful and sexist men. If it doesn't apply to you and you are genuinely feminist and concerned for minorities, this obviously isn't about you. But if you think the shoe fits, please wear it, and seriously start thinking critically and ask yourself why so many women and people of color are upset right now. Maybe put yourself in THEIR shoes for a moment. We're TIRED of being controlled 24/7, TIRED of having our own bodies up for vote, not being allowed the same rights and privileges as straight white cis men, TIRED of still having to fight for 'rights' we supposedly gained in the Feminist and Civil Rights movements. Literally NOTHING has changed in the US in terms of attitudes towards women and minorities since this government's founding, because it was always based in white male-dominated Christian nationalism and capitalist control of the poor, besides straight up genocide and slavery. It literally is ALL ABOUT CONTROL, control of women's bodies, control of minorities, control of poor people's labor, etc. and who wants to give up control when they're the ones still in power? The right-wing ideology provides them comfort and a promise of continued power while still exploiting their labor (because let's face it, that's all capitalist governments want - warm bodies to exploit for profit). They don't realize even they are suffering because of the hateful ideology they themselves buy into, which oppresses literally EVERYONE, even men. We've dumbed down and white-washed education so much in this country that people have ZERO critical thinking skills whatsoever and ZERO ability to even think for themselves because they've been told since birth how and what to think. Patriarchy continues to reinforce these ideas, putting down men who aren't masculine enough, etc. People continue to vote against their own self-interests time and time again because they're constantly sold lies they blindly believe, and they can't even comprehend the consequences of their own actions because they were never taught basic anthropology, economics, or civics. We've unfortunately already lost our collective memory of how bad things were before the Feminist movement and the Civil Rights movement, and I don't think people, especially young people, can even comprehend just how bad things will continue to get. People need to WAKE UP from this capitalist, patriarchal nightmare dystopia and actually start cultivating COMPASSION for others, work towards solutions, and stop being so comfortable supporting the status quo. Because as long as y'all keep doing that, NOTHING gets better, for ANYONE. We won't be free until EVERYONE is free, and literally NOTHING changes if people are still BLINDLY supporting white-male capitalist (and fascist) ideologies without questioning anything critically. Again, not an attack on anyone AT ALL. You can't necessarily blame people that have been unfortunately RAISED that way for generations now. But when you know better, you should DO BETTER. And now is sure as fuck a good time to start.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[userautumn]

Please. Tommys helicopter crashing while him and Buck are still broken up? That would be such great drama.

You know what I want? I want Buck to get mad. He has yet to actually get mad at a love interest. He's been hurt and confused, but I want him to get angry. I want him to go out and fuck like he's getting revenge on Tommy, even though he's the one who got left behind again, and I want him to convince himself he's absolutely fine. Eddie can see it, of course. Bobby and Maddie and all the people who love him can see that he's not fine, but I want Buck to pretend he is like he'll die if he doesn't. He deletes Tommy's name from his contacts and dumps all his stuff in the trash and erases his existence from his life like he's nothing more than yesterday's news.

I want this to continue through the rest of the season, long enough that both the characters and the audience start to think that maybe Buck is fine after all. Maybe this whole thing with Tommy was just a mistake, a hiccup. Maybe Tommy was right and saw writing on the wall that Buck didn't. Maybe he was smart by getting out when he did because Buck doesn't cry. He doesn't vent to Eddie, or show up on his doorstep like a kicked puppy. He lives fast and vibrant, and shows up to work covered in hickeys and lipstick and other people's cologne, and if Tommy really was as transformative of a love as he believed he was, shouldn't he be devastated?

Anyway.

Fast forward to the season finale. Athena has been following a case of corporate corruption where an auto and aeronautics manufacturer has been exposed for using faulty parts in their vehicles that have resulted in auto collisions and deaths across the country. None of this really concerns or interests Buck at all, if he's being honest. He fixes his own car for the most part (Tommy showed him how) and that which he can't do, he takes to his usual mom-and-pop mechanic for them to work on. Which is to say that, his life consists of sex and work, so news reports of [Same Company] being responsible for a Cessna crashing in Northern California don't really filter through.

Not until the 118 is called to a helicopter crash just outside of Los Angeles.

Even then, Buck doesn't think about Tommy. Why would he? Tommy Kinard is barely even a memory at this point, just an idea on the edge of his brain, an almost that was quickly buried. Helicopters crash all the time, so he has no reason to believe there's anything out of the ordinary about this one. But then when they're en route, Maddie's voice comes over the radio, tight with emotion and forcibly professional in a way that makes him immediately nauseous: Captain Nash, please be advised that the helicopter in question is one of our own. It's an LAFD chopper. Then, Hen and Eddie and Chimney and Bobby all turn to look at him, and Buck has nowhere to run from their gaze. Even if he did, he couldn't, because he feels paralyzed. Bobby's voice asking if there are any survivors, and Maddie's voice saying she's unsure get lost to the thrum of his heartbeat in his ears. Every repressed emotion, every memory, every bit of desperate longing and grief and love and anger comes rushing back in full force and all Buck can do is sit there while the engine weaves through Los Angeles traffic.

Tommy is fine, of course. He codes on the way to the hospital (Buck performing CPR on his boyfriend while begging him to stay alive is my drug), but once all is said and done, once he's come out of surgery with a little more metal in his body than he went in there with, he's okay. Buck isn't, not by a mile. He's full of too many emotions that he doesn't know how to sort through, chief among them being love, followed closely by anger, and then, guilt, of all things. But after Tommy opens his eyes, after Buck breaks down spectacularly, and after they finally confess that they love each other, Buck makes Tommy look him in the eyes:

"You don't get to run from this. Not again. I mean it. If you get scared, you talk to me. If you need to slow down, you talk to me. You don't make decisions for me, for us, and expect me to be okay with it. That's not how this works."

"Okay."

"I mean it, Tommy. I can't -"

"I mean it too. I promise. Okay?"

"Okay."

Anyways. Yeah. That's how I would do it.

[serial-unaliver]

having emotional intelligence formed through cognitive empathy rather than emotional has me learning every day things I do that I think are positive are considered manipulative in relationships by others. except i'm not trying to hurt anyone. i'm just balancing what appeals to me (cognitive empathy) with what appeals to most other people (cognitive and emotional empathy) to try and create a mutually beneficial interaction. I don't particularly upset anyone outside family other than therapists because they think I resist treatment or don't care to improve my behavior, but the "ideal" behavior is leaning towards the kind of behavior that had kids physically shoving and throwing me in elementary school. I would rather people see me as somewhat callous than the human version of a punching bag--no matter how many times you beat it, you know it'll keep letting you and never say a word about it.

isn't it interesting certain mindsets and behaviors are problematic in psychiatry but don't cause distress in actual relationships? it's as if anything but subservience is considered antisocial.

[luvlystarr]

·········♡········· Prompt: The moment the 141 guys realized they're in love with you. Content: Fluff! (This was all rushed so don't expect it to be the best lol) ························

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick - In all honesty, Kyle has probably been interested since the day you two met. But when he decided to bring you along to his cousin’s birthday party, that's when it fully clicked in his mind. At first he just thought it would be a good idea to get you introduced to his family, you were his close friend after all. It just so happened that his nieces and nephews were there and as soon as they met you they were instantly hooked. Kyle never knew you were so good with kids and just people in general. His nieces and nephews kept playing with you, while his other relatives genuinely enjoyed chatting with you. The exact moment he realized he loves you was when one of his nieces asked you, “Do you like Uncle Kyle?” To which you responded, “Yeah, he’s a very special person to me. I like him a lot.” Of course you had to say those words with that warm, kind smile of yours, it got Kyle melting on the spot. Unbeknownst to you, he heard every single word and has been absolutely lovestruck since then.

John 'Soap' MacTavish - It was quite an odd moment. The moment he knew was when you two were up late at night watching every single Harry Potter movie out there. At some point, about halfway through the third movie, you just started rambling about the characters and story of the whole franchise, even covering little details about the books. Johnny didn’t even know why or how his mind began to think that way, but he just found it so attractive. Even to this day he doesn’t understand why you geeking out about the Harry Potter franchise was so captivating. Maybe it was the way you looked so focused, or how the tv was illuminating your features perfectly, probably your angelic voice too. Either way, he can’t stop thinking about you and he uses every chance he gets to get you talking about any of your interests.   

John Price - He would probably never admit this but the moment he knew he’s in love was when the two of you were fighting. Both of you had a tiny disagreement on something but it ended up growing into a heated argument. For almost half an hour straight, you two just kept going back and forth, gradually raising each other’s voice and becoming more irritated. By the end it got so bad that you slammed your hands on the table and got snappy at John, yelling strings of insults at him. He should be just as angry, but no. In that moment he could’ve sworn his heart skipped a beat. How could he get mad if you looked so cute with your pouty lips, furrowed eyebrows and crossed arms? He mistakenly let out a small chuckle at your attempt to be intimidating but he was met with a slap on his face. At that moment he knew that the only reasonable explanation why he felt that way was because he was head over heels.

Simon 'Ghost' Riley - You were the first person he actually got close with. Sure, he has Johnny and he's an amazing friend, but the bond he had with you was unlike any other. The two of you found solace in one another and always had each other's back. The night he knew it was true love was when you drove all the way to his house after a terrible day. You were sobbing endlessly as you rambled on and on about how crappy your boss is as he intently listened, even rubbing your back while handing you a cup of tea. After comforting you, he insisted that you stay for the night. He let you wear one of his hoodies and even let you sleep in his bed. You were hesitant at first but quickly gave in with how insisting he is. He remembered watching you sleep peacefully, all huddled up beneath the blanket. He had to admit, you looked adorable wearing his hoodie with that calm look on your face. That's when it dawned on him just how much he loves you. ········································································

[badgerbaggage]

Look, unfortunately, Santa is actually right.

And I think it's a means of our survival.

We need to entrench ourselves in our communities, fortify our bonds, recruit sympathizers. We start where it's safe, but we start exposing these people to the fact that we're not disposable, that we're not some scapegoat.

So let's reframe "disagreeing yet remaining friends."

You don't need to agree, nor "be friends" with bigoted ideologues to practice what the Santa account is saying.

Treating them as a friend is a performance (as many human social customs are). Be polite and be interested in their personal lives, what matters to them, what they're excited for, what they're afraid of. be known in your community, whether it's as a flashy character that's a staple of the local alternative bar, or as someone who walks their dog around the neighborhood. Find ways to display your artwork somewhere in town. Do favors for people.

You can refuse to engage with the horrible bigotry.

Rejection is a subtle means of advertising "this is intolerable and I will not engage with you if you continue." If somebody brings up something volatile, simply excuse yourself to get some water. You can leave outright, or you can return and try to shift the conversation. It is very difficult to do this when the current climate is about LIFE AND DEATH to us, but it is possible. This is a means of survival. Tread carefully and keep yourself safe. Let people understand you as a being before they know you as an extension of your identity.

On a wider scale, people NEED to be exposed to these larger topics other than through rightwing propaganda.

Experiencing queer people is far better if it's firsthand. "The supreme leader hath given us a new Scapegoat" works because they have completely MONOPOLIZED the narrative of who we are to our communities. They listen to the Heritage Foundation propaganda because that's the only depiction they've seen. Yes, some of this is out of their own ignorance and malice, but you DO have the power to change minds.

People also need to experience WEIRD SHIT that isn't hurting ANYONE.

There are unironically people who hate us just because their entire perception of us is manufactured by third parties. We all have the power to change perceptions in little ways. For example, I dress up like a punk werewolf and walk to a local alternative bar through a park and bustling downtown, even past an ice cream shop. It paints a massive target on me that says "IM WEIRD, LOOK AT ME." It is terrifying and I am incredibly uncomfortable the entire walk, but I'm exposing people to my gender queer ass in the periphery (I have the privilege to do this for many reasons; I'm not exactly living in my old, conservative, shitty hometown. Your mileage may vary). I am become Exposure Therapy.

You don't have to save the world, you just have to save yourself.

Again, we must ENTRENCH ourselves in our communities. We must forge bonds that our communities don't want to sever. Take root and prepare for the storm. Your efforts alone won't save the world, but if we can all just become a valued part of the life of 1 single detractor, that would have drastic effects on the national perspective of our movement.

Isolation is the end-bringer.

Just find one thing to agree with someone on. If they're deplorable, you can just agree that the weather is shitty, but through careful conversation and creative framing, you can easily get a hardcore MAGA fanatic to agree on culture and policy issues. We often want the same things, like freedom and prosperity. Find the NUGGET under the fascist shit and say, "we both want to be safe and with our families. We're not so different afterall."

LEGITIMIZE YOURSELF!!!

[cl-0v3r]

Mel is alive, but at what cost

Mel was nearly killed TWICE, her mother began being a struggle, she'd been thrown aside and trying her best to stop her, her boyfriend is not doing well, neither is anyone else (can't blame them) and the fact that she hadn't cried or spoke much about this situation to anyone a single time?? She IS upset about every single thing, yet she stays strong and enduring every bit of torture. The most she did was tell Jayce that Ambessa put her palm on the table, and let him know that she is going to push for hextech. That's it, nothing remotely related to her feelings.

The fact that she was constantly looking at Caitlyn, being able to understand her grief and knew she was in pain?? Mel knows this feeling. She'd went through it.

And in the end SHE has to pay the price of her mothers incompetence.

The intro is very much foreshadowing, we know the hands represent black rose/LeBlanc.

This is what happens in act one, she gets kidnapped by them. The lyrics do correspond to the characters as well (not just Mel, everyone.)

"Tell you you're the greatest" plays as a petal of the black rose floats down the screen, I think it adds significance to the power this organization holds, possibly the Medardas greatest foe.

"But once you turn, they hate us" both Ambessa and Mel were present in this line, I think its foreshadowing for when Ambessa switches up for whatever reason and goes against both Piltover AND Zaun. And Mel WILL go through change as well, a change that could hurt her relationship with others, and receive interest from others too.

"They hate us" could be read individually too, I feel like its a sort of "realization" ?? Perhaps Ambessa WASN'T the one that switched up, maybe Piltover switched up on them, and maybe Mel JUST got out of wherever she's taken to, and saw the mess Ambessa had done to her city??

I think this represents ACT TWO.

The hands pull away and it sort of looks like Mel is fighting back, a "get away from me" type of scream. you know what this reminds me of??

Don't mind me just pushing my Jinx/powder-Mel parallel agenda

Here is when i think Mel truly learns about LeBlanc/BR, she curiously and slowly goes to grab the rose, she learns about the history between her Mother and them, Kinos death, and most of all, learns about HERSELF. The lyrics speak otherwise.

"Pray away, I swear

I'll never be a saint, no way"

This feels like a parallel to caitlyn of sorts if that makes sense. Caitlyn had done everything to try and stop the council from attacking the Undercity, she kept her mouth shut when Jayce asked about Jinxs grenade, she was willing to protect Vi and the undercity, but how many times has she been tossed around? She'd been burned, exploded, kidnapped (god knows what happened during that time) and hit in the face by the same person, her MOTHER died because of the same person. She has every right to go insane. And she is hunting ONE person, which is Jinx. Although she is harming the people around her along the way.

What if Mel goes through a similar situation? Her mother pushed for war in her city, she dragged the enemy along with her even if she didn't mean to, she manipulated everyone around her INCLUDING Jayce, she LITERALLY got Mel hurt from the chembarons attack and killed so many people during a MEMORIAL to get her hextech weapons, Elora is most likely DEAD, not to mention whatever happened in the past between them. And the thing is, this will NEVER end throughout the entire season.

And what if she learns what she is? That she's 'blessed' by Kindred? The fact that the wolf is quite literally in her blood?

I feel like the "ill never be a saint, no way" also sort of indicates Mel will realize she'll never be able to push for peace and mercy like she always hoped for no matter what, and she comes to accept that as much as it hurts. But not like how ambessa accepted the wolf, but she sort of realizes she needs to push a little violence, towards nobody but the one and only, Ambessa "fine, if you want me to be like you, I guess I'll be like you towards YOU." Type of acceptance.

I think its also related to Mels new outfit too, she's dressed like her mother, in red and all of that. I will still stand by the idea that she has plans to decieve, but she will do something she doesn't want to do.

Mel was left with no choice, that lyric sounds like realization, acceptance, but also like a plea at the same time, an "I'll never be who I wanted to be" because in the end, she's still a Medarda, she's still her mothers daughter, she still has violence in her veins, she will never not suffer from the weight her name holds, and she will never escape it either, its like a shadow.

The Characters won't be themselves at their core this season. And those vital parts of their characters that represent them are no longer there in the intro, they all have given up what makes them, THEM design wise. (e.g.) Vi without her tattoo, Viktor hiding his identity with the mask. And the thing is, they did that to themselves because they do self-harm, they're changing themselves because THEY want to, they're forcing themselves to do that, they think they're undeserving and they're erasing their past selves.

But Mel? Mel doesn't have her gold accessories, Jewelry, or her Armor, she'd been stripped bare and hidden away because of the brutality of her name. She pays the price her mother brought to HER city. She's forced to change herself against her will, because nobody is giving her a chance to push for her ideals.

This entire theory never ends, and with all of this? I kinda do see Mel actually committing Matricide, it lifts the "Ambessa will die" theory further.

[ryutarotakedown]

do you think maya was ever upset at nick for not telling her anything about edgeworth choosing death

[wardingshout]

Zelda goes mushroom girl

[elsa-fogen]

Yep. Yeah. That's me. Almost all of it, except, i sleep well (if i manage to fall asleep) Reblogging because maybe some of you didn't know (i also didn't know)

Story time!

Too long don't read: used to sleep on private math lessons because i hate math; it takes hours for me to fall asleep WHEN I SUPPOSED TO, and my sister does it in 3-5 minutes.

I was studying at university and we had MATH there I've always had problems with it. since 5th grade i think (well, i hated math before too but real problems started there) when i changed schools and the new class was behind what I've already studied and i didn't pay attention, until i realized that at some point I was behind. I said "welp, i guess it's to late to try, so fuck it"

So at university we had this very high level math and i just couldn't understand a thing (and we had an awful teacher who was saying evvvvery time something like "yall getting expelled, we're all gonna die") so i decided "if i don't understand, fuck it then, i will not even try" and started skipping math classes.

But i STILL had to pass an exam, we were getting 3 tries and if you fail you're getting expelled. I failed first two what a surprise (i don't know how i managed to pass it after all, i can't remember SHIT, only that i is fucking non-existing number which is square root of -1. Why on earth would you need it i have NO fucking clue.

So i had personal teachers who tried to make me understand at least something to pass the exam. And there was one i remember very well, i even remember that we paid her 10$ per hour (for us that was quite a lot). And i remember her because i was SLEEPING. I just COULDN'T keep my eyes opened. She explains something about deviding by zero and my brain draws the fucking universe collapsing in front of my eyes. She gives me some task, I'm trying to write something and I'm falling asleep and DREAMING about writing, then ahe wakes me up and i see that i didn't write SHIT. It all ended when in the middle of lesson she just kicked me out.

And, what a miracle, I'm leaving her apartments and suddenly, all the sleepiness just wanishes! I'm walking home, thinking about some another AU of mine, roleplaying it with myself in my head, full of energy again.

That's not the only case of this, but it's the strongest i ever felt. But that like happens all the time, EVEN WHEN MY MOM OR MY GRANNY COMES TO ME AND START TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING I'M NOT INTERESTED, IM YAWNING AND FEEL URGE TO FALL ASLEEP. But the moment they leave, It goes away! I was calling it work allergy LMAO

I was diagnosed with adhd in my early childhood (there was also something about epilepsy, but it's ok now so it doesn't matter), not long ago i brought this fact back into my active memory (thanks to Jaiden animations ADHD video for that xD) i kinda used to myself by now and now I'm trying to catch and analyse all moments of adhd kicking in. I know my own tricks and buttons, how to make myself do the thing or just how to force myself into doing something. Because i know if i start, I'll probably lock in and won't get up until it's done (well, if i have at least a tiny bit of interest in that thing, or else i won't), and i hate it when someone interrupts me in the middle of the process. No mom, i can't come right now, i can't finish it later, because i either spend few more hours forcing myself to go back to the task or just forget about it.

But i didn't know that this sleepiness was a legit symptom! I just thought that it's exaderated boredom, that's it, had a joke name for it. That's... Funny to know that this thing is actually also adhd moment.

Also, about sleeping. I have problems falling asleep. I may lie in the bed for hours without even my phone, just rotating my stories in my head, and when i don't have a story to think about, this is just the name of my current hyperfixation with different tones and in different random dialogues that doesn't even make sense. I have no idea how to fall asleep, except when i didn't sleep for like 48 hours (EVEN THEN IT MIGHT BE A PROBLEM AND I START THINKING OF THAT CREEPY PRION SICKNESS AND SCARE MYSELF AGAIN). And my mom told me that it have always been like that with me. She and my dad had the whole ritual to make me fall asleep. Dad would hold me in his arms, his head with me covered with a blanket that i could only see his face (or else I would look everywhere and never fall asleep), and rock me for HOURS while i was SCREAMING and CRYING the whole time like i was tortured. But when I'd finally fall asleep, they could be as loud as usual and didn't have to whisper, because wake me up is a whole different story. And my mom was SHOCKED when all it took to make my sister fall asleep was just pet her back for 3-5 minutes.

I don't think of myself as... Sick or ill. That's how i was all my life, i don't know anything else. That's not a sickness to me, that's just part of my personality. Maybe sometimes some parts of it bite me in the ass and make my life harder, but i don't know other life. That's the only one I've got, and i guess I'm fine with that (tho now that i think about it, i need to pay more attention to how i write the characters, and don't make them all ADHDshers LOL i need to study neurotypical people under a microscope 🔬🔍)

bro im gonna CRY i didnt know this 🥺