#i don't hate it i just don't get the appeal

[boysbeware2]

all the old tptm girl journal entries w the new (if anyone wants to see them again and compare them)

please proceed with caution as many of these could be upsetting to read

disposable girl (jordyn)

(old)

i cant fucking stand this. i try so goddamn hard to make friends, to be attractive to people, to be even somewhat appealing to them etc etc. it never works. i thought it would get better the older i get. thats what i was told. guess what! i was fucking lied to!!! im alwasy left out of EVERYTHING i never get invited to shit and my own friends ignore me all the time. everyone looks at me weird. i cant go in public anymore im so fucking terrified of everyone. nobody fuckinf wants me, man. im so close to doing something stupid i feel so gross and ugly and dumb i should actually just die id be doing everyone a favor LOL

(new)

man, i havent been on here in forever. the internet is kind of dumb. what is there to say? my friend group celebrated our outpatient graduation anniversary the other day, that was pretty nice. we’re all trying to figure out housing stuff, nora’s been helping with that. freyja + mayra + kairi found a place already (how are they so responsible??) and the rest of us are trying to find places near them so we can visit more often. i never expected to have such a big group of friends. if you told me 2 years ago that i’d be living like this, i wouldn’t believe you. it’s still surreal to me. i’m not sure what i did to deserve them. same goes for my girlfriends. i don’t wanna say who just yet, we’re still figuring things out, but i’m just so thankful for them. i feel so lucky to have a second chance at life. i really didn’t believe people when they said it would get better, and then it did. how funny…..

irreverent girl (kairi)

(old)

I do not want God to see me anymore. I do not want anymore eyes on me. This is near unbearable. I have no one to turn to. My mother is in the church. Many of my friends are in the church. They would tell me to find hope through Christ. They would tell me to pray to Him. They would tell me that He will save me. He must not remember He made me, and if He does, He simply does not care. I know this is unbecoming of me, and I don't mean to be dramatic. I am simply depressed, nervous, and I cannot tell what's real and what isn't anymore. I know I'm supposed to hear God speaking to me, but I do not, and I am tired of straining my ears. I just want to see a doctor. I want some kind of tangible solution. I do not want to pray anymore. Praying hurts. I only do it when I am afraid, but I am afraid much of the time. I don't want to be unheard anymore. I do not want to hold out hope for someone who does not act like they're there. I am hurting. I am hurting. I am hurting. Belief is hurting me. The idea of God is hurting me. I need an out. I am hurting.

(new)

When I have a job and money and I can move away from my shitty Mormon parents

splitter girl (tahira)

(old)

theres something so broken in me thats beyond saving. so i dont know why i keep trying to be saved. i meant to kill myself when i was 18. i didnt. all ive wanted to do lately is kill someone or something. i havent. im too much of a pussy to plan anything concrete, no matter how much i hate everyone around me. no matter how much i get off to videos of people dying or how much i love cutting myself i cant actually take action against other people. i am fucking purposeless. i was born from evil and i will always be evil and i cant even live up to that. i hate myself i hate myself i HATE myself and the universe hates me too. i dont know what to fucking do at this point. i talked to one of my friends about wantingto die and they said smthn about hospitalizing myself. maybe. i dunno. i dont know what else there is for me/. my eyes are fucking burning from lookign at my computer for so long adn not getting any goddamn sleep. i am not a good person. i dont think i can be helped but i just dont wanna fucking keep goign to school and being around people and pretending like everything is norma;l. i cant keep doing it. what the fuck is wrong with me whagt happened. why cant i be loved or feel love for other people when did something change in me that switched the aggression and affection parts of my brain. im hyperventilating ill be back. maybe

(new)

getting myself onigiri from this one good boba place 2nite bc im 8 months clean…… its the little things~ ^^

fainéant girl (freyja)

(old)

i know i dont hate being disabled... i just hate being disabled in a society that makes existing difficult... but sometimes i really just dont want to be disabled anymore. i dont want my family to lecture me about how i could be helping out more, or how i should get a job. i dont want teachers to keep asking me whats wrong or the fuckin uni counselor to try to get me hospitalized. i dont want to be in so much pain anymore, to feel so exhausted that i cant even do so much as prepare food for myself, let alone do anything meaningful or fulfilling. its not fair. i shouldnt have to stay inside and sit in the dark all day,. i should be able to have friends. to talk to people and to go out with them and to feel like i am alive. its lonely and traumatic to suffer through this and on top of that no one around me understands, and they never fully will. i am tired of trying to justify my existence to everyone, to explain the pain that i am in and why i shouldnt have to experience it. i know the problem isnt me. i know i live in a world that isnt built for me. but if the world cant change then sometimes i truly feel that i should just stop living in it. my lifespan is already shorter than everyone else's anyways. what difference does it make

(new)

my qpps didnt seem to appreciate me playing Alien Kids Alien Rap for them. Do they even love me

caliber girl (nora)

(old)

唉～It is 3 AM and I should go to sleep but I can’t. I have a work zoom meeting early in the morning and I gotta hit the gym also because I haven’t done leg day in like… weeks. Oh well, it doesn’t even matter. My value is depleting but I don’t think I care anymore. The turnaround date for my code is also in a couple of days and I haven’t made any progress. I keep getting the same error and I’m too tired to figure out what’s wrong. I might get fired at this rate LOL(笑). If that happens, I think I’ll just consider ending it all. Not that anybody will miss me. God I sound so weak and pathetic right now. When did it get like this. How did it get like this. I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’ve been through worse before and this is nothing. Ugh, why is it so hard to breathe? My chest hurts and I feel like something is wrong but I don’t know how to make it go away. Should I call someone about this? No. No one is awake or around to help. I’ll be fine. I’ll just sleep it off. Shake it off… shake it off…

(new)

My Tamagotchi beeped during a meeting fml

chocolate box girl (morgan)

(old)

i thought i was doing better but i cant stop thinking about them. their touch, their interests, their smile, everything. the worst part is that i miss them, after all of what they've done to me. i was 13. i dont even feel justified calling it rape since our relationship was so muddy... they never yelled at me or was angry at me, they just got so sad when i tried to speak my mind, and got all my friends to hate me when we finally broke up. i never said no so i feel like im insulting actual survivors by feeling violated. i wasnt even trying to get into a relationship with them, it just happened... i feel like everyone around me wants me in the same way they did, even though im an adult now and i dont even try to make myself appealing. i wish i could trust people not to take advantage of me, and i feel disgusting and selfish for feeling like everyone has ulterior motives of getting me to fall in love with them, or worse. that's so self centered of me. i dont know how long i can keep doing this

(new)

girl help i cant stop looking at anime figures on japan yahoo auctions !!!!!

taxidermy girl (mayra)

(old)

I don't remember ever not having a sex drive, is that normal ? I was born and then it was all downhill from there, something happened to me sexually i think, I don't know what happened, because I don't remember much, but something happened and I was beaten for it and yelled at and my mother hated me, and now I am an adult and I try to have sex, and I'm not there mentally, even if my body is participating, I feel like I am in the past again, being beaten and yelled at . I want to keep trying, I want to have fun, to feel safe in someone else's arms, to reach the heights of pleasure, but my mind scares me so much, I haven't been able to eat anything today because I feel so horrified by my body . If I was good I would have been born as a nonsexual being, no parts, no desires, no instincts, a blank slate, too empty to be enjoyed . Do you know what it feels like, to have your mother tell you people want to sexually abuse you when you are a child, and then to be made fun of by your peers for being so ugly, to have your middle school and high school classmates joke about how much they don't want to have sex with you ? I am illicit and undesirable at the same time, I am everyone's last option, I am nothing and still too much, rotting deer meat on the side of the road . I wish I had been born as something beautiful and pure, I wish I could start over, that whatever that initial sin was had never been committed .. I want to start over

(new)

Went to a kink event the other night and everyone was so nice … The low lights were fucking with my vision so one of the hosts helped me navigate the place . I ❤️ you random disabled ally with a pup mask on

chemical girl (joy)

(old)

LMAOOOOO im too angry and miserable to be around. i think i just need to give up at this point because theres clearly like. something broken inside me that cant be fixed. that has 2 be it because i try to talk and i just sound cold, i try to make a joke and it comes out overly edgy and unfunny, i try to be like everyone else but its too much. i cant even be a collection of the positive traits i see in others, i try to replicate it and it comes out warped and wrong. im either fucking enraged or in abject misery or way too happy and nobody can keep up with me. the thing is i dont even blame them. i wouldnt want to be around me either. do u know what thats like? being someone you wouldnt want to know? i keep hoping that one day ill wake up and suddenly be normal, the mood swings will be gone and everyone will like me and i wont do stupid shit that pisses them off. but i know that day isnt coming. theres no hope for me and i want to say sorry to everyone who has ever had the misfortune of knowing me but i know it wouldnt do anything. theres nothing i could ever do to make myself right

(new)

i need to convince my gf to take me to Round One again soon

refraction girl (nataana)

(old)

i don't want to do this anymore. i'm going somewhere better

(new)

talked with my psych and i’ll be starting TMS soon, it’s some thing where they put magnets to ur brain and it’s supposed to treat depression.. trying to temper my expectations bc i’ve tried so many treatments that just do nothing for me, but i’d be lying if i said my hopes weren’t riding on this. i want to confidently say i’m glad to be alive. i feel like i’m getting closer to that

nurse parallel/machine girl (xiomara)

(old)

I am so excited... Tomorrow my experimental outpatient treatment plan begins!!! I'm beyond delighted. I have complicated feelings about my DID being in remission, but it's nice to feel stable enough to be in charge of something this big, and to not have terrible gaps in my memory anymore. I still don't remember everything that happened to me, but maybe I don't need to. At this stage of my life, I feel content. I can confidently say everything was worth it. I want to help others feel that way, too. I think I can.

(new)

I’m meeting up with a new friend tomorrow… I feel nervous, but it’s a good nervousness, I think!

[saintberceuse]

Is it just me or are HH and HB so bad that it's ruining the appeal of actors involved?

The writing is so bad and cringey that I'm perplexed as to why they agree to be in it.

I used to like Harvey Guillen, Richard Horvitz, and Christian Borle, but G-d why did they agree to be in this crap to voice such obnoxious characters? That new HB character's dialogue was so bad and stereotypical. I can't believe non-Hispanic people are applauding it and saying it's great representation. No one talks like that and that character was literally so pointless he shouldn't even exist. Some people even think he's meant to be Brazilian instead of Mexican. Why would he agree to voice this character?

My best guess is that an agent kind of heavily suggested they take the roles to be known/liked by gen z and millenial audiences and it maybe looks humble to help out an "indie" show that's really popular online.

But geez :/

I can best relate it to being in elementary or middle school and having a really obnoxious classmate that's maybe really good at something. All the other kids also hate them and find them annoying and don't care that he's smart or good at art or whatever, and they can get away with it because they're all the same age. Teachers, however, got to act nice to them since they're adults and whenever the brat shows off their talent they feel obligated to "ohh and ahh" and be encouraging while the class is groaning and really wishing they'd just ignore it because it's just feeding their ego.

Like ... alright, maybe these actors really don't care and are just being nice, but they don't got to. Vivzie is not some little poor indie kid that needs your charity, you don't have to help her out by lending your voice talent and promoting the show. You're making yourself look cheap and like bad actors :/

[velvetvexations]

It's frustrating when any radical feminism is called out in trans circles, the whole thing is "well since I'm trans I can't be a TERF"!!! Like, transmisogyny is not the only thing TERFS and radical feminists preach?? Like if you're anti sex work, anti kink, anti bodily autonomy for any kind of transition or sex, think men (whoever the individual bigot defines as such) are genetically predisposed to evil, think women (whoever the individual bigot defines as such) are predisposed to good, and anti-ace/aro people, like one or two differences in opinion will not preclude you from radical feminism. Idk, out of the "trans inclusionary" radical feminists, I feel as though you either fall hard into transmisogyny or transandrophobia.

But a lot of the people who believe in all the same things as the normal strain of radical feminism but support trans women just,, only seem to think that transmisogyny is what TERFs preach?

Also like lowkey I never understood the Shinigami eyes extension because TERF dogwhistles are kinda easy to spot and easy to check. Like, overly judgmental of a random woman? Overly judgmental of a random man? Seems to think x kink is evil? Implying porn is disgusting and evil (without any actual criticisms of the industry, just talking about it inherently)? Weird about ace/aro people and their attraction or lack thereof? Wow! Probably a terf.

I think there is some issue with "OP is a TERF" that made shinigami eyes appealing for a lot of people. I once saw someone make a really good point about how a theater production that sexualizes nuns is not progressive for sexualizing women who don't want to be sexualized, but whoops, OP was a TERF. Often moral rationality is not an issue of logical reasoning as it is motivation. For instance, I also saw a tankie shitheel give a pretty good rundown of Chiquita's bullshit in Central and Southern America. In both cases, Bad Group A was opposed to Bad Group B, whether that be imperialism or the patriarchy, so they can call out legitimate issues when they want to before going right back to complete bullshit and supporting their own evil shit.

But absolutely no one actually knows what TERFs are anymore because they do think it's literally all just hating trans women and are incapable of connecting the dots between TERFs and second-wave feminism, and realizing that they have a whole suite of beliefs that goes beyond that. It's partly obscured nowadays for exactly the reason that they'll often be aimed at cis men, which TRFs simply don't count as evidence of them hating men because of course you should be against like, Cis Male Celebrity Getting #MeToo'd, as though the issue with TERFs isn't that they see that and trans people as being products of the same patriarchal system because their view of the entire world is warped.

Especially funny is the claim that you can't call TRFs TRFs because they don't self-identify as TRFs. I mean, even putting aside Talia Bhatt's book, we have a very famous meme of Sonic the Hedgehog telling TERFs to fuck off for using that exact same "that's just a slur to silence me" argument. Like, no! You may not recognize what you're saying is nearly identical to everything TERFs say just because you add "trans" behind "women," but that's a you problem!

[wavysocks]

People are going to hate me for this but I don't like Fiddlestan, weather you see it as a valid or a dumb opinion I shoud never to express, that's fine yknow. I fuck with people drawing them and I can get the appeal of it, but I just can't help but feel like Stan is seen as nothing but a plan B to Fiddleford.

Like maybe this is how I see it but if it were canon then I wouldn't see Fiddles treating Stanley any better than how Ford treated him. The twins are literally identical that Fiddle would mistake Stanley as Ford and while it would be an accident of course, you just have to ask if Fiddle really does see Stanley? Like does Fiddleford love him because he's Stanley or does Fiddleford love him because he reminds him of Ford?

I mean tell me how much I'm jealous because I have an oc shipped with him or how I hate every character that treats Stanley wrong, it all don't matter in the end if you agree or don't agree because it's just a ship that isn't canon anyway.

[endlessburningdarkness]

**I headcanon their relationship falls apart anyway, even without a reveal, bc there's only so long Shen Yuan can lie to himself and put up with terrible sex and LBHs manchild behaviour. I imagine he logs out at some point and returns to his real life.**

Can you develop more this, please? =)

Through most of the story, Shen Yuan is going from one crisis to another. He doesn't have time to sit down and think and be honest with himself. After the story ends, and he has to think beyond just surviving I imagine he will eventually realize he wants more than a relationship built on a lie, and terrible sex and the life of a cultivator.

I imagine he'll crave modern things more and more, not to mention, finally remembering his family and the life he left behind, the life he could've had, where he doesn't have to get his arse ripped open bc the protagonist will cry and destroy the world if he doesn't feel sufficiently "loved". Isn't it telling that both LBH and SY's idea of love requires sex, which one of them doesn't enjoy?

I also imagine he won't be able to deny how manipulative and coercive LBH is, and LBHs appeal as a character (and he does still consider LBH a character even in the end, its why he insists on bottoming, bc the stallion protagonist couldn't possibly take it up the arse) will dwindle and fade away.

It's like how you like badboys in fiction, but if you really had to deal with one irl day in and day out for years on end, you'd say fuck it and pack your bags. If the story book world is now real, that means real human emotions and realistic reactions to things, and I can't see Shen Yuan, realistically, wanting to stay.

So he would find an out, either by killing himself or just logging out and going back home. I don't think LBH would let him leave, and he knows that. It's why he feels so pressured to keep LBH happy and content and sees it as his responsibility, bc an unhappy LBH = world ending. Eventually though, he'd get over that idea, once he has time to pause and think things through and sort out his feelings and get used to his new, disappointing life.

Maybe Shen Yuan becomes the new protagonist, and lives out his dream of being LBH. bc that's the real reason he was reading th original novel, it was a male power fantasy, and Shen Yuan bought into that. He wants the power fantasy and he'll ultimately have to confront his own unhappiness and disappointment within himself. There's only so long you can lie to yourself. Shen Yuan lies to himself in order to survive, but once survival is secured, he will have ample time to realize he's been lying to himself, and that he doesn't want to continue.

And maybe some things are worse than death. I can't imagine years of lying and being coerced into a relationship with painful and humiliating sex is gonna feel any different from torture via human stick a few years down the line.

Him logging out and continuing with his normal life is probably the funniest outcome. I can see him writing fanfiction of Shen Qingqiu becoming a demon lord and fucking LBH/women as a sort of therapeutic exercise to deal with his trauma in the real world afterwards.

Honestly, I think he'd be relived to escape and probably give up his online hating. Which is ultimately the message mxtx wanted to send by writing a story about a straight online troll ending up getting fucked in the arse so badly he bleeds every time. don't hate in front of the author's face, aka the comment section, which is what Shen Yuan was shamelessly doing, harassing the author so much the author remembers all his comments. It would be a nice ending to say he learned his lesson?

But i also don't think an online hater deserves what Shen Yuan is put through in the story as "punishment" for his bad behaviour. It's not that serious imo. Good thing its a fantasy story and doesn't take itself too seriously. It would be a lot more depressing then, and not nearly as funny.

I may have gone a little offtopic. Oh well.

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

I wonder what are your NSFW headcanons for Rotface.

Since New Vegas was my first Fallout game, I'm pretty sure Rotface was one of the first ghouls I ever had a lil' crush on. I very distinctly remember seeing him sitting on the sidewalk in Freeside and having a moment. I dunno, there's something about his cheeky demeanor that I find very appealing. Sort of like the sass Harland has, but in a softer, more self-depreciating way. Plus, I love a man who knows all the good gossip. Thanks for the ask, friend!

Rotface (Fallout: New Vegas) NSFW Headcanons

Is young for a ghoul, maybe in his early fifties. However, he was flash-ghoulified at a fairly young age. Late twenties, thirty at most. Though he isn't that old overall, he's been a ghoul for a significant portion of his life.

He's absolutely one of those people who doesn't care in the slightest what you call him; after all, that's how he ended up being called "Rotface". If you don't want to call him that (which I would not, because it's terrible), he's fine with whatever pet name or nickname you give him. If he likes it enough, it'll just be his new name. It's not that he doesn't remember the name he was given at birth; he simply chooses to not go by it for reasons he's not eager to discuss. He also doesn't like to talk about how he initially became a ghoul, and you often wonder if the two facts are related.

Understandably, he's not exactly eager to make himself physically accessible, maybe even a little moreso than other ghouls. There are a lot of people out there who would love to take advantage of people in a situation as vulnerable as he is. He's learned that painful lesson more than once before. There's also a certain level of dehumanization that he's been constantly exposed to, between the homelessness and the ghoulification; people are quick to write off both as a nuisance or a societal problem. It's taken quite a toll on his self-esteem.

That said...he's self-doubting, not stupid. If you're very clearly expressing interest and have proven trustworthy, he's more than agreeable. Before he was so irradiated, he wasn't the smoothest guy in the world, but he was friendly and sociable enough to date around a normal amount. He's spun the block a time or two, so he knows how to show you a good time. It's been a while since he got laid, but not nearly as long as some ghouls go without; a few years at worst. Most of his nerves when you two get close come from insecurities about his body, not his capabilities as a lover.

Horny-brained, but embarrassed by it. Tries his best not to indulge himself in a lot of the fantasies that pop into his head, but when you've got nothing to do but occupy your mind all day long, sometimes you can't help yourself. That particular problem gets infinitely worse when you start coming around, as his brain is eager to spit out images of you that make him blush heavily the next time he sees you (thank god you can't really see it with how mottled his skin is). If you get him a little drunk, he might tell you about one or two of those fantasies.

In the same vein, he's got a high sex drive, but he'll try his best to not "pester" you with his incessant need most of the time. He's not very good at hiding it, though, not with as attracted to you as he is. Tries his best to be sensitive to your moods, so if you don't necessarily seem open to fooling around, he'll grit his teeth and bear it. Even if you are open to helping him out, you might have to tiptoe around the fact that his cock is obviously tucked up into his waistband in order to get him to let you. He hates feeling like a pest.

He's a great listener (obviously). Loves pillow talk after sex.

Bit of an exhibitionism kink, but not in a way that the idea of people watching turns him on. He's moreso...indifferent to the attention of others. He spent so long with no real privacy that he doesn't necessarily consider where you are when he starts getting handsy with you; it really only matters if the two of you are alone in that moment. Someone could be right around the corner, but it won't stop him if he's fixated enough. You can be quiet, can'tcha?

Refuses to get naked during sex, or ever, really. As with many people who are turned into ghouls all in one go, many of his injuries and scars are pretty gnarly, and he's very apprehensive to let you see much of him. You insist his body would never literally make you sick as he worries, but he tells you that you don't really know what you're talking about. He'd rather not risk you losing attraction to him because you see what he really looks like.

[qwainte]

Am I the only one who doesn't really care for bloodweave?

[kirby-the-gorb]

[izzyspussy]

the fact that they made it illegal to make ads louder than programs on tv in 2010 but haven't updated it to apply the same regulation to streaming. who do i have to call.

[brofightiscancelled]

okay ill bite why do u hate kaoru sakuraba sidem aside from the fact that they went from hokuto as a main blue to downgrade to kaoru. to make it less awkward that I’m asking abt sidem on ur osomatsu side blog, what sidem idols would u assign to each matsu ?

i think sideM should collab w osomatsu-san and put them all in Beit so they can all get JOBS!!!!!!

anyways i hate kaoru from idolmaster sideM. i need all my osomatsu-san side blog followers to know that i hate this man. "i need a lot of money fast to pursue an extremely niche medical research track, which is why i quit my stable and high paying job as a surgeon to become an idol while having no soft skills, physical strength or stamina, or interest in getting along with people" are you Stupid??

he's not even using his idol clout to spread awareness of the rare disease he's trying to cure (like SEM does) so it can secure funding, he sees it 100% as a job and refuses to have fun, he is actively unpleasant and uncooperative in every interaction with his coworkers because he's trying to "rise to the top". it seems like the only thing he has going for him are his looks and that he kind of liked to sing when he was a kid. why not become a model at that point when you have the personality of a wet tree trunk. or better yet why not STAY A FUCKING DOCTOR!!!!!

also, i don't like meganes, so write that down.

[danmeichael]

"shen qingqiu is a liar who is lying about his feelings so we can't ACTUALLY tell how he feels about anything"

so you admit that you can tell he is lying and by extension you can actually discern what his true feelings on the matter are and that he's just unwilling to admit to them.

[sinclarify]

i'm lucky enough to not have stumbled upon the secret history fancasts or faceclaims or whatever yet but just the thought of people deliberately finding the most attractive people known to man to assign to the greek class makes me giggle so hard. like.. henry winter does not look like that...! doesn't richard literally say that henry's like mediocre at best.. francis straight up says he's not attractive.. scratches head idk like i guess people can have their fun and mould the characters to fit into what they think best suits the Aesthetics of the book and their own dark academia fantasies or maybe the depravity of these characters can be alleviated because yayyy now they're hot!! and it's all so romantic and elegant and alluring now! and god yes please send me falling into the tortured arms of henry winter so he can whisper ancient greek in my ear and tell me all about how he loooves killing because it adds a cutesy little spark to his life <3 isn't that captivating ^_^ ? anyway i think i went off topic a little bit but you understand. the blind romanticisation of this book and the ignorance towards donna tartt's actual intentions with it will kill me DEAD.

[mymarifae]

does anyone want to join me on the aventurine/argenti train. it's got all the perks of being as funny as any other argenti ship - especially given the random absurdity of their first meeting. what the hell was argenti doing in the depths of the nihility? who even knows anymore man. but like also i think it has the potential to be really sweet?

aventurine hasn't let anyone In since his sister died. he's long since forgotten how to Trust, and Love, and how to BE Loved. and this, combined with enormous amounts of survivor's guilt and trauma and being treated as an object, has really done a number on his self-esteem. he doesn't act like it (because he's learned that it's dangerous to be vulnerable; it's the one gamble he's not willing to take), but 2.1 gave us that glimpse into his inner dialogue and it is Bad in there

between his conversation with acheron, the note veritas left for him, and finding a sense of closure in the apparition of his younger self, he's on track to becoming better. we can see it in the way he pretty much immediately reaches out to the trailblazer to get some things off his chest once he gets his phone working again. and the way he's accepting what is basically a form of therapy from the doctors of chaos. but his self-hatred has been building up for years, and it's going to take a long time to unpack and unlearn all of that

so like, in comes argenti, right? he's a loud show-off, but he is SO earnest. he sees the beauty in everything and everyone. he's kind, and gentle, and so full of love. he also comes off as a bit... lonely to me? he's spent so much of his life chasing after idrila's shadow, and only catching a glimpse of them in his many near-death experiences (and isn't that something to think about...........). he's not like, secretly miserable or faking or anything - i think his exuberance is 1000% genuine. but humans are social creatures; everyone wants and requires at least some form of closeness and intimacy. to have a love to pursue in This realm... someone he can see and hold without needing to have one foot in an early grave . i think that would be good for him. that's all

anyway, it's clear that argenti was pretty enchanted by aventurine

like yeah that's kind of just how he talks normally but !?@,%&#& that's a lot of awfully romantic things to say about one specific person out of the several you apparently rescued (??????? god i love this guy he makes no sense. literally why are you even here bud). it seems that aventurine's more subdued state left an impression on him too, and well wouldn't it be pretty in character for him to start popping in randomly... as he does, because he can apparently just go wherever the fuck he wants. to check on this sad yet oh so beautiful peacock.. to try to bring a true smile to his face... to show him how kind and beautiful the universe can be......

i think aventurine might have a hard time laughing off offers of comfort and company and the beginnings of a courtship if it comes from someone like argenti. this man couldn't be disingenuous if he tried. he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve as much as he rips it out of his chest to show you. it'll be a learning curve regardless - aventurine is too used to needing to constantly prove his worth to keep anyone around and to keep them from hurting him

but do you see it. do you see the vision. do you see how Sweet this could be. aventurine is about to receive more roses than he'll know what to do with

[benetnvsch]

ppl be like "knkdz is abusive bc knkd is mean to dazai when dazai canonically struggles with mental health and is suicidal and blah blah blah :(" and then turn around and ship skk with their full chest as if their dynamic isn’t based entirely on the fact that they canonically genuinely hate each other-

Like? U can dislike characters all u want - go ham - hate them for no reason even but u don’t have to lie and mischaracterize and be a massive hypocrite abt them idk

[spyres]

i don't really like confessions blogs because i feel like they just fuel the fire for fandom discourse but ngl i agree with pretty much everything that's been posted on the is*t one so far so i'm okay with it for now lol 👍

[synthaphone]

Unfond of this new style of illustration for item artwork on Neopets- the Chokato Kiko Taffy clearly took a lot of time and effort to render, all for a result that looks vastly more uncanny than the Bubblegum Kiko Taffy + the rest of the item set it was based off of.

The final image is only 80x80px, there's no need to give it that type of rendering treatment! It only makes image less clear. In addition, making the pupils smaller, adding an outline to the iris and reducing the mouth to a pinprick combine to make the face look creepy and haunted doll-like instead of cute.