#i don’t think I’d be able to get over him
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What Baby Wants, Baby Gets : ̗̀➛ Max Verstappen
summary: he might try and guilt you for making him go out in the early hours to satisfy your cravings, but you won't let him win
You couldn’t help but smile as Max groaned beside you, his arms stretching up before his hands ran over his face, head tilting to his left so that he could glance across and take a look at you.
“Morning,” you whispered, resting your head down against his shoulder. “Did you have a good sleep?” You then asked, sniggering as Max scoffed, his head immediately shaking across at you.
In the early hours you found yourself struggling, unable to push the thoughts of your cravings to the back of your mind. For a while Max managed to ignore it, but eventually he made the mistake of asking if you wanted something, only for you to tell him yes.
It felt like a figure of speech when you first fell pregnant, with Max telling you to get him if you needed something, wherever, whenever. But he didn’t quite imagine himself actually being woken up at two in the morning with you begging him to help you out.
“Last night was a one-time thing,” Max told you, covering his mouth as he let go of a yawn. “Do you know how long it took for me to fall back to sleep? Especially with you snoring right beside me.”
An apology came from you, but so did a chuckle as Max glared down at you. As soon as your craving what satisfied, you found yourself easily able to fall asleep, not worrying about Max and the fact that he was now the restless one tucked up beside you.
Although he teased, he was relieved to see you resting though, knowing just how little sleep you were getting with your baby constantly reminding you that he was there.
“I do appreciate what you did last night,” you whispered, brushing your hand gently through Max’s hair. “You didn’t have to get up and run to the store.”
“I did, because I promised that I would always do whatever I could to help you,” Max reminded you, kissing against the top of your head, “and what baby wants, baby gets.”
Your head nodded as Max trailed one of his hands down to rest against the top of your baby bump, his smile wide as he felt just how big it was again, knowing that you were already nearing the halfway mark.
“I know for a fact that this little one appreciates what you do too, they were feeling particularly peckish last night,” you added, pressing a kiss to Max’s shoulder.
His eyes rolled as once again you used the baby to get to him, knowing that if there was one person that he couldn’t say no to, it was definitely your baby.
“I can’t wait for when the baby arrives so I can tell you to go and get your own food again,” Max joked, “you won’t be able to treat me like your slave anymore.”
“You’re so dramatic, don’t pretend you don’t enjoy all of this.”
It wasn’t exactly his favourite thing to do getting up in the early hours of the morning, but knowing that he was helping you out did fill Max with pride.
“Maybe I’d enjoy it more if you asked at a decent time,” he laughed in response.
“I don’t think I get much of a choice, if you’ve got a problem, bring it up with your child instead,” you smiled, tapping against your baby bump.
Max’s eyes watched over you carefully as you moved closer into his side, moving one of your hands to rest against the small of your back. A groan came from you as you tried to get comfortable again, a game that you had been playing with your child for several weeks now.
“Do you think the baby knows the most inconvenient times are to be annoying to us?” You asked Max, hearing a chuckle come from him. “Why can’t they be restless at lunch? That would be perfect.”
“I don’t think they’re smart enough to tell the time yet,” Max sniggered, squeezing around your frame. “It’s going to get easier, hopefully the cravings will stop soon.”
Your head nodded as Max tried his best to reassure you. Whenever you were struggling, he was right there with you, somehow Max always knew the right thing to say to make you feel better, making sure to hold onto you too to let you know that he was there.
“It’s going to be alright,” Max whispered closely to your ear, “whatever comes our way then we’re just going to take it on together and find a way to figure things out.”
You hummed as Max spoke, a lot more doubtful than he was. If he could, Max would read just about every baby book, watch every documentary, absorb as much knowledge as he possibly could to make sure he knew exactly what to do in every possible situation.
“If it’s not morning sickness it’s cravings, and then once that finishes then it’s going to be the lack of sleep, soon enough I’m not even going to be able to see my feet.”
Before you could continue, Max quickly shushed you. “And I’ll be there to help you with all of that, no matter where we are or when it is.”
“I thought you didn’t like the early hours?”
Max jabbed against your side as you teased him, knowing that regardless of the time he would always be there. It hurt him a lot seeing you so uncomfortable so often, he wished that there was more that he could do to make your life easier than it currently was.
“If I were you, I’d make the most of me running around after you,” Max grinned, “because once the baby is here, they’ll be the only person I’ll be waking up at three o’clock in the morning for.”
“You mean to say you’d leave me to fend for myself?”
“Absolutely,” Max jokingly smiled, “you’re capable of getting up and sorting yourself out, a little baby isn’t quite as developed as you are.”
“I’m spending nine months growing this child of yours, just in case you’ve forgotten that,” you quickly reminded him.
“I know, I’m just messing with you,” Max assured, squeezing your frame. “I might have to cut myself in half so one part of me can look after you and the other look after the baby, that way I might just be able to be in two places at once.”
“I’ll be alright,” you whispered, only for Max’s head to shake, refusing to let you take care of yourself straight away once the baby arrived.
It didn’t matter whether you were pregnant or not, injured or in peak condition, Max loved looking after you and would always do so, regardless of how much you sometimes protested against him.
Now more than ever he was glued to your side, he’d tease you and mess with you but he wouldn’t have it any other way, being able to help you was one of the things he enjoyed the most at the moment.
“I can’t wait to see how things play out over the next few months, how big of a change is about to take place in our lives,” Max mused, resting his head on top of yours.
“I’m terrified,” you admitted, “no one can predict how this is going to play out, there’s a fear of the unknown lingering in the back of my mind right now.”
“You don’t need to worry,” Max assured you, “no matter what happens, we’re going to face it together, I’m going to be right here with you.”
“Even in the early hours of the morning?”
“Even in the early hours my love.”
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
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Hey babe, i love every Nathan fic that you wrote, and if you’re open to request and feeling fluffy would you do the honor to tell us what happen after Need You? I just want to snuggle up with Nathan so badddfdd, Thank You🥰
Awww <3 <3 <3 Of course!
Thank You
Nathan Bateman x gn!Reader • Rating: PG pals Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | request info • buy me a coffee? • ask-travaganza masterlist •
Summary: Nathan is tired.
Warnings: Fluff, cuddles, Nathan being playfully grumpy, teasing, not beta read, please let me know if I have missed a warning!
Word Count: 630
“Hurry the fuck up.” Nathan says from the doorway. He stares at you a little more intensely than he normally would because his glasses are already off and on the bedside table.
You snort and nearly choke to death swallowing toothpaste. You manage to spit it out into the sink. “I’m brushing my teeth?”
“You’re taking hours.”
“It’s been two minutes.”
“Far too long,” he uncrosses his arms, “You’ll damage your gums, come on.” He moves towards you and you yelp and giggle, brandishing your toothbrush like a weapon.
He pauses and smiles.
“Let me wash my mouth, then I’ll come to bed. I’m not having you drag me again.”
“Why?” He grins, pretending to start to move closer. “You liked it last time.”
“I did n-” You stop yourself, you’re not even going to try to argue with him when he’s in this kind of mood. No matter what you say he’ll throw something else back, playfully of course. And over the top. And incorrect. It wasn’t worth the energy.
So you poke your tongue out at him quickly before you turn and rinse your mouth with water.
His hands around your waist make you laugh. “Nathan.”
“What?” He leans his chest onto your back like a baby koala. “You're comfy.”
“Oh my god.” You mutter, but there’s humour in your voice. “You big baby,” you tease as you stand.
“Yes.” He pauses, meeting your eyes in the bathroom mirror. “Don’t make me do the baby voice again.”
“Okay! You win.” You grin, turning to hug him and he kisses your cheek.
“Bedtime.” He whispers and you just about manage to jump out of his grasp before he tries to pull you to bed. “Hey.”
“I’m going to bed!” You laugh as you dance out of the room and get under the covers.
He smiles, turning off the bedside lamp and quickly joining you. He pulls off his t-shirt as you both get comfortable. He quickly urges you onto your side, so he can hug you, being the big spoon.
The second your head hits the pillow he’s tugging at your top. “Take this off.”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Why do you want it off?”
“Want to feel your skin.” He grumbles, “Instead all I can feel is this.” He pulls at your top again, snapping it back a little.
“Ow.”
“Sorry, also that didn’t hurt.”
“How do you know it didn’t hurt?”
He shrugs. “Wasn’t that hard.”
“You don’t know what it felt like to me.” You give him a look over your shoulder and he kisses your cheek.
“I can tell you real ‘ow’, from that fake ‘ooowww’ any day of the week.”
You poke your tongue out at him again.
“Very mature.” He grins, “If you don’t stop doing that I’m gonna give you something to put in your mouth.”
“I thought you were tired.”
“I am.” He pushes his hands up under the bottom of your shirt. “A goodnight blowjob, that sounds great.”
You shake your head and laugh, but help him to take your top off so that he can snuggle you to your back. “You really want a blowjob?”
“Always, but I don’t think I’d get it up for a billion dollars at the moment,” he yawns, curling up closer to you. “You can try though.” You know his eyes are already shut and he’s just playing, but you still make a show of pretending to try to turn over and paw at his waistband.
“Nooo,” he mutters softly, rubbing his face and beard into your back. “Sleepy time.” He kisses your skin and breathes deeply, finally able to relax.
You chuckle and settle back down to go to sleep.
“Thank you.” You hear him mumble just before he dozes off. “For coming to bed.”
Thank you for reading!
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Old Man and the Sea - Tsukishima Kei x Reader
Best Friend's Brother and confession - for @fuzztacular - for the Milestone Event Week 1 - Words: 4,4k
- Age 4 -
You meet Akiteru first, of course.
He’s tall for his age, towering over the other kids even at four years old.
“You can play with me,” he declares with a smile when he notices your excellent aim and non existent fear of getting dirty.
“Do you wanna walk home with me?” He asks that first fateful day at kindergarten, your mothers chatting at the gate.
“Sure,” you say and clutch your bag a little tighter, excited to have found a friend on your very first day too.
“Do you have a pet?” Akiteru asks as you walk.
“Yes. We have a turtle. His name is Old Man.”
“That’s so cool!” He grins wide, astonished. “I wish we could have a pet. Or if I could have a sibling. Do you have a sibling?”
“Yes,” you nod. “My sister is older.”
“Oh, that’s cool. Is she nice?”
You think of her, towering above you. How she always does her homework when you want to play, how she doesn’t like when Old Man tries walking into her room.
“Sometimes,” you offer, because last week she helped you bake a cake for Mom and Dad, didn’t snap once even when you accidentally added too much flour.
“If I was a big brother,” Akiteru declares with gusto, “I’d be the best big brother in the world.”
-
“I have to tell you something!” Akiteru declares just a few months later during break time, pulling you with him toward the swings where there’s enough privacy to share secrets. “I’m getting a sibling.”
“Really?” Your heart beats hard in your chest and you smile. It’s hard not to, when Akiteru smiles so brightly himself.
“Really. Oh, I hope it’s a brother. I wanna teach him all my favorite games.”
“You could teach those to a sister too.”
“Sure,” he hesitates for a second. “If it’s a little sister, you need to teach her.”
“What?”
“Like how you do your hair so nice.”
You touch your braid, hesitating. “But my mother did it.”
“Well, you can teach my little sister then.”
And you think, surely you’ll be able to teach her. Surely it won’t be that hard.
-
- Age 5 -
Kei is born at the end of September. You remember it well, because the day had been unexpectedly rainy, drenching you on the way home where your mother sat, phone in her hand.
“Do you need me to get Akiteru? No, no, bring him over. I’m sure they’ll be happy to have each other until everything is done.”
“Akiteru is coming over?” You ask, dripping all over the floor.
“Yes, in a minute. His brother is coming.”
“Where?”
“Here, silly.” Your mother smiles. “He’s about to be born.”
And you wonder what that means all while feeding Old Man with Akiteru, while eating Ramen and watching TV, the rain hammering against the windows as if it’s just as eager as the grown-ups to meet the newest Tsukishima.
You, well… you’re a little more hesitant than eager.
Kei’s red faced and small, his skin wrinkly and weirdly fuzzy.
“He’s ugly,” you point out with surprise, flinching at your mothers disapproving glare.
“He’s just squished,” Akiteru defends his little brother. “I’m sure you looked ugly on your first day too.”
You consider that for a second. You don’t remember what you looked like that day.
Kei raises his voice in the silence, loud and determined and you think that at least he’s got something to say if he’s not good-looking before you’re being ushered out again.
-
To your surprise Akiteru is right.
Kei’s wrinkly skin smoothes out, the red turning into a soft, pale shade. His eyes are a warm brown and he likes to squeeze your pointer finger as if he’s shaking your hand. He grows quickly too, both in seize and weight, turning heavy in your arms whenever Akiteru allows you to carry him.
Kei likes Old Man and the space underneath your bed, crawling in there when you’re all playing in your room.
He likes your dinosaur plushy and strawberries and sometimes, when everything is quiet and calm and Akiteru and you lay down next to him on his blanket, you wonder if your sister ever looked at you the way Akiteru looks at him or felt the way you do.
That quiet sense of wonder, that prickly feeling of astonishment, that warm love you can’t seem to stop.
-
Akiteru likes Volleyball. You don’t mind it.
Ever since Dad got you your first Science kit you’ve grown obsessed with digging up rocks and examining the minerals, or picking bugs from trees to identify them under your little microscope.
Little Kei has no choice but to share those interests.
Even at three years old he does his best to receive his brother’s spikes, not once crying when it hits him in the face.
“Look what I found,” he tells you on the daily, delivering a shiny beetle to your waiting hands or putting away the rocks you find in the park when your mothers eyes are averted, knowing she’ll never check his bags as thoroughly as she checks yours.
When you have to do a report on your best friend in school you hesitate for a moment. Is it Akiteru or is it Kei?
-
- Age 10 -
You’re ten years old when your parents separate and although you don’t understand the full extent of it, you know you’ll always prefer your father over your mother.
So when they ask you who you want to live with, it’s not a hard choice.
It should have been, though, because no one told you your father was going to move you, away from Miyagi with it’s wide, open landscape and away from Akiteru and Kei.
“You’re going to visit, right?” Akiteru asks, so much taller than you already, both arms on your shoulders as he tries to instill something inside of you, maybe a sense of peace or belonging or something else.
Kei’s tall for his age and you often forget how young he still is, looking eight at barely five years old.
But he acts his age now, snotty nosed and crying, dirty hands curled around yours.
You’re dear to him like he’s dear to you, you know, and you don’t want to miss him growing even taller.
“You can keep my dino plush,” you promise him. “So you don’t miss me while I’m away.”
“What about Old Man?” He asks. “Are you going to feed him without me?”
“I’ll have to,” you admit glumly. “But I’ll take pictures whenever I can. He’ll not forget you, I’m sure.”
-
It’s hard, seeing them only once a month when you’re with your mom, even more so when she tries very hard to capitalize the little time you have in Miyagi.
“I’m trying to build a family here,” she tells you more than once when you’re on your way out and over to the Tsukishima’s. “You can’t just leave for the neighbours every time you’re here.”
But Kei grows so fast you feel like you’re missing everything and Akiteru’s got a new best friend at school you don’t know and can’t she understand that’s more important right now?
- - -
- Age 15 -
Something has changed this year.
The House of the Tsukishima’s is quiet as you turn up, no Kei running down the stairs to greet you, no Akiteru training in the garden out front.
“Hello?” You yell into the quiet. “Anyone home?”
“Oh, sweetpea.” Their mother steps out from the kitchen. She looks older, much older than you remember. Has it really been just a month that you haven’t seen her?
“You’re growing so much,” she points out as if it means anything in comparison to her sons. “How’s school?”
“Good. Where are Akiteru and Kei?”
“Oh,” her brows furrow. “Probably in their rooms.”
“But it’s so nice out.”
“Yeah,” she sighs. “I know.”
You trample up the stairs with impatient steps, knock on Kei’s door first because it’s closer to the stairs.
“What?!”
“It’s me,” you tell him, supply your name after an alarmingly long pause. “Can I come in?”
“Fine.”
You swing the door open to find him on his bed, reading. He’s grown yet again and the thick-rimmed glasses make his eyes look big, their brown still warm and reassuring even though all of him is cold and angry.
“What are you doing?”
“Reading.”
“What about?”
“Stuff.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No,” he huffs before hesitating. “Maybe. Did you know Akiteru-” He hesitates again. “Did you know Akiteru stopped playing Volleyball?”
“What?!”
“Yes,” he seems braver now in the face of your surprise. “He kept telling us he’s the ace at his Volleyball Club but he’s not even a starting player.”
“Oh no.”
“Yes,” Kei’s voice is wet now. “It’s so lame.”
You sit with him for a while, pretending not to notice the tears rolling down his cheeks as you try to understand the world. Akiteru, lying? That’s unheard of.
-
“Whatever!” Akiteru snaps when you ask him about it. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Yes it is,” you insist. “That’s a lie! You never lie!”
“I had to,” he bites back. “Like anyone would have still liked me if they knew I wasn’t even good enough to play!”
“I would have liked you.”
“Sure,” he scoffs. “But you’re never here anyway.”
“That’s not my fault.”
He falters at that, softens around the edges to the point he just drops where he’s standing, just a heavy weight on his bedroom floor.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve got science. I only had Volleyball. Turns out I’m not even good at it.”
“Just because someone’s better doesn’t mean you’re no longer good.”
Akiteru scoffs again. “It’s not the same. You’re not the same.”
And maybe he’s right.
You’ve finally found friends in your new hometown, some girls from your english class that like to dress up with you and go shopping and there’s the Science Club that you attend that has a lot of funny guys in it that invite you to Game Nights.
You feel like you’ve finally found a foundation to build onto only to find your old friendships crumbling.
“I’m sorry.”
Akiteru looks conflicted. “You don’t have to be sorry about that. It’s okay… I think.”
- - -
- Age 20 -
“Hey, I’m driving back to Miyagi this weekend,” Akiteru declares as he picks you up from Lab. “Do you wanna come?”
“Uh,” you check your calendar. “Sure, why not. Anything new?”
“Yeah,” he smiles, wide and excited. “Kei’s playing Volleyball for real now.”
You snort. “He’s been playing for a while now, what’s the difference?”
“You don’t get the difference, because you never took it serious. But I can tell it means something to him. He’s started caring again.”
“Oh,” you think of Kei, the one you knew as a little boy and the cold, difficult preteen he turned into five years ago. “I’m curious.”
-
You can see it too, now. It’s in the way he holds himself up, shoulders wide and proud. It’s in the way he talks to his mother, his best friend - adorable Yamaguchi who always blushes like crazy in your vicinity - and his brother. It’s in the way he talks to you. Like he means what he’s saying. Like he almost dares to be vulnerable again.
“How’s Old Man?” He sidles up to you after Dinner, Yamaguchi already on his way back home. Your Futon waits to be unfolded but you’re not that tired yet and he doesn’t seem to be either.
“Good.” His shoulder presses into yours, warm and steady, like a promise.
It’s still there, that feeling you first felt when sleeping next to him as a child, that quiet sense of wonder, that prickly feeling of astonishment, that warm love you can’t seem to stop. Friends, you remind yourself. You’re friends. More like siblings, really.
“How’s school?”
Kei tells you all about it. How annoying Hinata and Kageyama are, too loud and too talented and too dumb at the same time. How their managers are so vastly different in their characters and yet both so trustworthy at the same time. And although he does not say it out loud, you can read the worry between his sentences. What will happen once the Third Years Graduate?
“You’re doing amazing,” you smile and he reciprocates, a tiny, quiet, warm moment just for the two of you.
-
And Kei is just a friend, you keep reminding yourself.
When you go watch his Matches with Akiteru, laugh when Saeko Tanaka not so subtly asks if you’re interested in Akiteru before she advances on him herself.
When you watch him grow even taller, prouder, more sure of himself.
When you attend his graduation and wonder just how it could happen, how tiny, ugly Kei could turn into this.
-
- Age 25 -
You’re dating a coworker by the time Kei starts College.
Masayuki is not the most romantic, but neither are you. He plays volleyball after work so he and Akiteru are well acquainted, though not as close friends as you’d like them to be.
Old Man lives with you now, just the quiet companion you need for your after work studies, for lounging on the floor with a good book, or wondering about how the world works at the quiet hours of the night.
It’s a quiet life, filled with too much work for too little pay, but you get payed to look at rocks for a living, so you don’t want to complain too much.
-
“I’m leaving in half an hour,” you tell Masayuki over the phone as you’re getting ready. “Do you want to come?”
“To what?”
“Kei has a game,” you pull a sweater over your head and decide against it immediately. That color really washes you out.
“Okay.”
“Okay you’re coming or okay you have other plans?”
Silence.
“Masayuki?”
“I’m just wondering why you attend all his games.”
“Well it’s Kei.”
“Sure,” he doesn’t sound sure. “But-”
“What?” You stand there, topless, staring at the bright display of your phone, the background not one of the few pictures you have with Masayuki but one taken after a big win, Kei’s arms slung around you and Akiteru, face pressed together.
Something drops low in your stomach and you know, even before he speaks up again, that something just changed.
“Don’t you think it’s weird?”
“Weird?” You repeat, your voice empty.
“Yeah, how you… how much you care about Kei. I thought maybe it’s because he’s a Division 2 player and I get that, our games are not as big or flashy or important, but it’s in other things too.”
“Other things,” you echo and he talks on, seemingly encouraged by your answers.
“Yeah, like… you’re not one to go out much and I get that, I’m the same, but when Kei calls you’re always up to go to whatever College Party he’s inviting you. Remember how you had that trip with your mother that you wouldn’t cancel for me?”
You remember it well. You cancelled your family trip because Kei had tickets for the Jurassic World Premiere. In your defense, Jurassic World Premiere’s only happen once, your mother will keep bugging you forever.
“That’s different.”
“Is it?” His Question seems to grow in the Silence, multiply into a hundred voices all screaming at you. Is it? Is it? Is it?
“If it would be Akiteru, I could understand, you know? You grew up together, you’re the same age, I’d think you’re into him.”
He doesn’t add any more words, doesn’t have to.
You’re five years older than Kei.
“Don’t you think it’s weird?” Masayuki asks now and your stomach clenches so violently you fear throwing up.
“I’ve never thought about it,” you tell him. It’s not a complete lie but not the whole truth either.
“Well, you should. And I- maybe we should take a break… while you figure it out.”
His voice is too casual. He’s thought about this in great detail, it seems.
“Okay.”
“Okay.” You can hear him sigh. “Take care, okay?”
“You too.”
The connection ends with a click and it’s ironic, it really is, that that’s all that’s left of your almost one year relationship. Just the Silence after, and the stale test of old secrets.
You: Hey, I’m afraid I can’t come to your game tonight. Period came early and it’s wreaking havoc on me. So sorry! But you’ll rock it without me, I’m sure!
Kei: What a shame. Shark week truly has the worst timing. Take care, okay? I’ll check in on you later. Koganegawa says Hi.
You stare at his message for far too long, curl up under your blanket and watch Old Man walk tireless circles around your bedroom.
Masayuki’s words dance like demons through your brain until you fall asleep.
You wake in the middle of the night to soft knocking on your door and a familiar voice.
“It’s me, Kei. Are you up?”
You don’t dare move, don’t dare to come face to face with him so soon.
“Don’t you think it’s weird?” His question is heavy on your heart. Does Kei think that too? Maybe you are. Maybe you’ve been his weird big sister for a while, sitting too close at family gatherings, always there at every game because you can’t seem to stay away.
Maybe he’s never had the courage to tell you to take a step back.
Maybe, and that hurts the most, you’re the reason he still doesn’t have a girlfriend yet. Because you’re holding on to tight. Because you’re acting weird about it. Because-
“I’ll check on you in the morning, okay?” Kei’s voice cuts through the turmoil in your head like a hot knife through butter. “Sleep tight. Take care of her, Old Man, okay?”
In the morning you’ll find chocolate and painkillers in a bag tied to your doorhandle and a good morning text on your phone.
You do your best ignoring both.
-
“What’s up with you?”
You turn, surprised to find Akiteru at your desk.
“Hi to you too. Do you need a report on any minerals?”
“No, I’m here to check if you’ve turned into a fossil yourself.”
“Geology,” you point at yourself. “You need to ask Kei about Fossils.”
Akiteru rolls his eyes. “You know what I’m talking about.”
“No.”
He snorts. “You’re ghosting us. Me and Kei and probably your other friends too, but I don’t have their numbers to check.”
“I’m not doing anything like that.”
“Please,” he scoffs now. “You’ve missed two of Kei’s games. That’s unheard of. If Masayuki said anything-”
“Can we just not talk about it?” You interrupt him, grabbing your bag and ushering him out. You don’t really want to be the lab gossip for the next month.
“I think we should.”
“Oh no,” you shake your head, pushing him along. “I was the middle man of your stupid fight for years, you owe me.”
Akiteru’s face falls. “Damn, it’s serious if you pull that card. Really, what did he say?”
“What makes you think he said something?”
“He mentioned something at training. He let me know that you’re no longer together, but that it was a mutual decision and that the reason should stay private for your sake.”
You huff out an unamused laugh. “That Shithead.”
“So?” Akiteru’s eyes are warm and honest, but you swallow the need to tell him.
“You’re biased, I can’t tell you.”
“Please, when have you ever not told me something? I know everything about you.”
“Ah,” you turn your face away. “Sure.”
“Well, if you don’t want to tell me, can you at least call Kei? He’s been in a mood all week. He deserves to know you’re not mad at him.”
“Maybe I am.”
“Oh,” Akiteru whistles a tune. “That’s new. You’ve never been mad at him once.”
You falter. “Surely that’s wrong.”
“Nope. Can’t remember a single time.”
“Well,” your stomach churns as you speak, as you try to make your lie sound more believable. “That’s how it is with little siblings, right? They can never do anything wrong.”
And you wish you didn’t look Akiteru in the face as you said it, because you can see it so clearly in his eyes. He knows you’re lying.
So you turn on your heel and walk back inside, relieved and disappointed at the same time that he’s not following you.
Kei: I’ve bought too much Lettuce, I’m bringing some over after training.
Kei: Left the Lettuce outside. Did you remove your spare key from under the rug?
-
Kei: Hey, didn’t see you at the Match tonight, are you still not feeling well?
-
One missed call from: Kei
-
Kei: You’re really starting to worry me, what’s going on?
-
Kei: I’m giving you one last chance to call me back.
-
The sound of a key turning has you look up from your book, frozen in your spot on your bed. Old Man’s munching on his lettuce, too focused to care.
“Hello?” You ask into the quiet of your apartment, heart hammering against your ribcage.
The door opens soundlessly. Kei’s head almost knocks against the top of the doorframe as he steps through, hair disheveled, glasses speckled with raindrops. He stops in his tracks when he sees you and you wish he wouldn’t, wish he’d give you a moment to regain your composure, rain in your heart that tries to crash out of your chest at the sight of him.
He’s too tall and too broad, his hair too pale-golden like the moonlight and the worry in his eyes too thick to swallow.
“What’s going on?” Kei asks, breaking the spell. You shift your gaze to the page in front of you, unseeing. Can he read your eyes as well as you think you can read his.
“What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean.”
“No, I don’t.”
He sighs, clearly exhausted. At this time, he must have come here right after training, maybe even skipped the shower.
“Look if Akiteru said something-”
Your head lifts, surprise gurgling through your veins.
Kei’s wringing his hands now, a nervous gesture you’ve never seen on him before. He’s looking at Old Man instead of you, lips moving without making a sound.
“Just because Masayuki broke up with you doesn’t mean he has to rush things, I mean-” He hesitates and your confusion grows.
“I’m not following you, I-”
He gestures for you to stop, pulls a chair out from your kitchen table and sits down across from you, shoulders hunched under an invisible weight, cheeks burning red.
“I’m going to make this quick, okay, because I’d rather not make myself suffer anymore than necessary but- I like you. I’ve liked you since I knew what that meant. And I know I’m much younger, but I’m not a child and I’m mature for my age and if you’d give me a chance I’d make sure you’d never regret it-”
“What?”
Kei takes your hand and you can feel the tremor going through his limbs as he does.
He licks his lips.
“Would you date me? Yes or no. You can say no, I’ll get over it, I promise.”
“Y-yes, I mean wait, what?”
Kei’s eyes are open and vulnerable. You’re reminded of that one night five years ago, when he started caring again, when he sidled up to you after dinner, one shoulder pressed into yours. Your fingers twitch and curl around his as if they already know what your brain hasn’t processed yet.
“You like me?” You turn your eyes to the floor, too overwhelmed with the truth swimming in his. “You like me? It’s not weird?”
You can feel him shrug but his hand doesn’t let go.
“I mean, maybe it’s weird, but who cares? I’m pretty sure Akiteru is dating Saeko and that’s weird too.”
You laugh, the sound breaking free from you.
“You like me,” you repeat, reaching out with your other hand to find his already moving toward you. “You like me.”
“Should I repeat it too or is it enough if you do it for me?” Kei’s sarcasm is softer now, just a little teasing. You smile and he smiles back and you can’t help yourself, have to lean in and touch the red blooming on his cheeks.
“You like me,” you confirm once more, for good measures. “For real.”
Kei snorts. “You sound like a teen.”
“Shush. Did no one teach you how to respect your elders?”
- - -
- Age 26 -
Kei snores. It’s such a tiny tiny detail in the sea of things to know about him, yet you’re so unreasonably fond of it.
He’s doing it right now, one head on your shoulder, his glasses folded in your lap.
“Can you shut sleeping beauty up?” Akiteru asks from the front, clearly annoyed.
“I could, but I don’t want to,” you reply.
Kei’s nose curls as if he’s heard that but he lets out a sigh right after, exhaling softly as he sinks further into you.
“Such a sap,” Akiteru teases you once more and you let it happen.
It’s true after all.
-
“Oh, you’ve grown again,” Tsukishima-san calls out with exasperation at the sight of Kei, pinching his cheeks. “Are you eating enough?”
“Mom!” He cries out, embarrassed.
“Help me!” He asks you. You just laugh.
“I put your Futon into Kei’s room,” she tells you as the boy carry up the luggage. “I know how he is. He’d just climb through your window if I didn’t and I know your mother. She’d throw a fit.”
“How is she anyway?” You ask. “Did she say anything, about… you know what?”
“Ah,” Tsukishima-san weighs her head left to right. “She was surprised, for sure. I think she always had her mind set on Akiteru. Got me a pretty Yen, you know.”
You gape at her as she snickers, proud of herself. “Oh yes, I knew it right away. That bet’s been going on for almost as long as Kei’s been around.”
“You’re a trickster,” you tell her, not quite sure what you’re supposed to think about it.
“Where do you think Kei gets it from?”
“Gets what from who?” Kei asks, stepping into the kitchen. He’s never far away for long, always eager to close that space again. His hand slides into the back pocket of your jeans now, squeezing your butt.
You throw him a pointed glare and he grins, the picture of innocence when he’s anything but.
“I can’t tell you without insulting at least one of you,” you huff and he preens while his Mom snickers.
It’s weird, you can’t help but think as they chat, how this house, this family, already feels like home.
Maybe because it always has been. You’d just been a little too shy to grasp it fully.
#Milestone Event#my writing#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu x you#hq x reader#haikyuu!!#tsukishima kei#tsukishima kei x reader#tsukishima fluff#tsukishima angst#tsukki x reader#tsukishima brothers#tsukishima akiteru
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And then i go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like i love you.
Part 9 of 12
Synopsis: lies, junk, and ebay side hustles
Pairing: unrequited JJ x Reader, Eventual Rafe x Reader
masterlist
—
The Twinkie’s engine hummed as they drove, the soft rumble steady in the quiet night. Y/N leaned against the window, watching as streetlights cast fleeting shadows across her face, leaving brief glints on her tired eyes. John B’s hands gripped the wheel, knuckles pale in the dim light as he guided them down familiar roads.
This had been one of the longest - but one of the best nights of Y/N’s life. After the initial shock of finding out each other’s secret wore off, John B volunteered to drive Y/N home, much to Rafe’s dismay.
They had both grown up on these roads, weaving through the same streets, crashing at each other’s houses, and finding trouble together. Now, things felt… different. As if, somehow, the ground they had always trusted beneath them was shifting. Their silence was comfortable but weighted, as if both of them were holding onto thoughts too heavy to put into words.
After a while, John B finally broke the silence, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. “So… I guess we’re practically in-laws now.”
She let out a small laugh, though it sounded more like a sigh. “Guess so. Funny, isn’t it?”
John B smirked but grew thoughtful, his gaze fixed on the road ahead. “I mean, I get how I ended up with Sarah, but… you and Rafe? When did that even happen?”
She felt a slight warmth creep up her face. “Uh… tonight, actually.” She paused, swallowing. “We kissed for the first time. I think the word for it is ‘unexpected.’”
He shot her a sidelong glance, eyebrows raised. “You’re kidding me. Tonight?”
“Yeah. Tonight.” She gave a half-shrug, avoiding his gaze. “It's kind of… I don’t know, it just happened.”
John B let out a slow breath, shaking his head in disbelief. “You kissed Rafe Cameron tonight… wow.” He let that sink in, his fingers tapping a slow rhythm on the wheel. “Guess we’re both out here crossing some major lines.”
Y/N gave a slight nod, feeling the truth of that for herself, too. Sarah Cameron and Rafe Cameron—these were people they’d known their entire lives, kids who had grown up with a silver spoon and never seemed to notice the Pogues except to look down on them. And yet, here they were, tangled in the lives of the Kooks they’d once considered untouchable.
“How did that even happen?” she asked quietly, her gaze still on the passing trees.
John B rubbed a hand over his jaw, considering. “It’s… complicated. It was one of those things that just kinda… snuck up on me. I was working on Ward’s boat one day. He needed help with something in the engine room, and when I came up, Sarah was there. She was sitting by the dock, crying. She’d just broken up with Topper.”
Y/N raised her eyebrows, though she wasn’t entirely surprised. “Yeah, he’s… something, isn’t he?”
John B chuckled dryly. “Yeah, that’s one way to put it. Anyway, she looked… different. Vulnerable, I guess. Not like her usual ‘Kook princess’ self. We just started talking, and I don’t know… the lines got blurry. I wanted to hate her, but it’s hard to hate someone when you’re actually seeing them. You know what I mean?”
She did. She understood that completely.
“Yeah,” Y/N murmured, tracing her finger along the edge of the window. “Rafe… I never thought I’d be able to trust someone like him. I mean, it’s Rafe Cameron. But tonight, something just… clicked. And I realized I wanted to be around him. It’s strange, but being with him, even just for a night… it made me forget about a lot of things.”
“Like JJ?” John B’s voice was quiet, understanding. Y/N felt her heart constrict at the name, the weight of years of friendship and unspoken feelings pressing down on her all at once.
“Yeah,” she whispered, almost to herself. “I’ve been in love with him for so long. And it’s like... it’s been this constant thing in the back of my mind, like this background noise that I got used to. But tonight, with Rafe… it was like the noise stopped. For once, I wasn’t thinking about JJ. I was just... there, in the moment.”
John B let out a slow breath, nodding. “It’s kind of terrifying, isn’t it? Letting someone in like that. I know how much you cared about JJ. Honestly… I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you guys. I’ve known you my whole life. You and JJ are the only people who… get me. And now I’m dating Sarah, and you’re with Rafe… it’s almost like we’re betraying something.”
Y/N looked over at him, their eyes meeting for a long moment. “Yeah, it feels like that. It’s not just about us—it’s about all of us. Our whole group, the way we’ve always been there for each other. I keep thinking about what JJ would say if he knew.”
John B’s lips pressed into a thin line. “He’d be pissed, that’s for sure. Hurt, too. But… maybe he’d understand eventually.”
“I don’t know, John B. He’s stubborn. And this would feel like a double blow. We’re his oldest friends, and… he’d feel like we’ve crossed a line. Especially me, with Rafe of all people.” She sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. “I can’t imagine losing JJ because of this.”
The silence fell again, heavy with memories and old loyalties. Finally, John B glanced over at her, his voice a little softer, a little more vulnerable. “Then let’s keep it between us. We don’t have to tell anyone. I mean… if things get serious or whatever, we’ll figure it out then. But for now… let’s just keep this between us. I’ve got your back if you’ve got mine.”
Y/N smiled, the weight lifting just slightly. “Deal.”
“Good,” he replied, a flicker of relief in his eyes. He offered her a small grin. “Guess we’ll be each other’s partners in crime, sneaking around with the Kooks. Never thought we’d end up here.”
She laughed softly, nodding. “Life has a weird way of throwing curveballs.”
As the Twinkie carried them back down the familiar roads, Y/N felt a sense of calm settle over her. They had their pact now, an unspoken agreement to protect each other and their secrets.
—
The salty breeze tugged at Y/N’s hair as she made her way down the familiar path to The Chateau. It had been a week since she last saw the Pogues, and her absence hadn’t been unnoticed. She’d spent the days since the chaos at Tannyhill trying to process everything. The kiss with Rafe felt like a whirlwind, and now she had to face her friends, especially JJ, who she knew would be the hardest. Her stomach was in knots as she approached the hangout, trying to steady her nerves.
John B had said he’d smooth things over, but Y/N wasn’t so sure. Not when it came to JJ.
When she entered, the usual hum of conversation was absent. The Pogues were gathered around the table, but it felt… off. Pope and Kie were sitting together, but their smiles seemed forced as they looked up at her. The only one who wasn’t pretending was JJ, standing by the window, his back to the room, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. He didn’t even look her way as she stepped inside.
Y/N hesitated in the doorway, her gaze flicking between Kie, Pope, and John B, who was leaning casually against the counter. “Hey,” she said, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.
Kie’s face lit up, though there was an obvious undercurrent of confusion. “Look who’s back! You good? Where’ve you been?”
Y/N winced at the warmth in Kie’s voice—so different from JJ’s cold silence. “Yeah, just needed some space,” she replied, not wanting to dive into details.
Pope nodded but didn’t press further. “Everyone’s been asking about you,” he said. “Glad to see you finally made it out.”
John B gave a small grin, trying to ease the awkwardness. “Yeah, we were starting to think you’d forgotten how to find us.”
Y/N gave him a small, forced laugh, but her eyes were drawn back to JJ, who still hadn’t turned around. The tension was palpable, and it felt like the air itself was thickening with each passing second.
She tried to take a step forward, but JJ’s voice cut through the room like a knife. “So, nice of you to join us,” he muttered, his tone sharp. “Thought maybe you’d decided we weren’t worth your time anymore.”
Y/N flinched. She hadn’t expected the bite in his words, not after everything they’d been through. She knew he was hurt, but hearing it from him like this felt like a slap.
JJ finally turned to face her, his face hard. “You know, I was worried sick after that voicemail,” he continued, his voice rising slightly. “You didn’t answer my texts, didn’t pick up the phone. What the hell, Y/N? You left me hanging.”
Y/N’s throat tightened. She hadn’t expected this level of anger, but hearing him say that struck a chord. She swallowed, trying to steady herself. “You could’ve picked up the phone the first time I called,” she shot back, her voice sharper than she intended. “This wouldn’t have happened if you had actually been there when I needed you.”
The words hung in the air between them, sharp and raw. JJ’s eyes widened, surprised by her retort, but there was no denying the hurt that flashed across his face. “Oh, so now it’s my fault?” he said, voice low and simmering. “You think it’s that simple?”
Y/N’s chest tightened. “No, I don’t think it’s simple,” she snapped back, her frustration mounting. “But I tried reaching out, JJ. You’ve been so caught up with everything else, and I—” She broke off, running a hand through her hair. “I needed space. That’s it. I wasn’t trying to make you feel like you didn’t matter.”
JJ shook his head, clearly struggling to contain his frustration. “You can’t just disappear like that without telling anyone what’s going on. I thought something happened to you. I was out of my mind, Y/N.”
She softened slightly at the vulnerability in his tone, but her anger still simmered. “I didn’t want to worry you,” she muttered, her voice quieter now. “I just needed time to figure things out.”
JJ exhaled sharply, clearly still hurt but now holding back, as if deciding whether to continue his outburst. Finally, he muttered, “Fine. Just… next time, don’t leave me in the dark. I don’t do well with that.”
Y/N nodded, her throat tight as she met his gaze. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel like I didn’t care. That’s the last thing I want.”
There was a long, heavy silence before JJ, with a frustrated sigh, finally gave a small, resigned shrug. “Alright, fine. Just don’t do that again, okay?”
John B, sensing the moment was still tense, stepped in with a lighthearted tone, trying to ease the mood. “Alright, enough of the drama. We’ve got a Pogue reunion here, right?” He glanced at Y/N with a small, reassuring smile. “Let’s just have a good night, yeah?”
Y/N gave him a tight smile, but her gaze lingered on JJ for a moment longer. There was still a distance between them, an unspoken tension that neither of them could ignore. But at least, for now, they were talking again. She only hoped the cracks in their friendship wouldn’t be too hard to fix.
—
A few days had passed since the tense moment with JJ, and things seemed to go back to normal, or at least, as normal as things could get in the Outer Banks. Y/N still spent most of her free time with Rafe, sneaking in moments together whenever they could. It felt like a secret they were both carefully tending, and despite the weight of keeping it under wraps, there was an unspoken comfort in it. She had no intention of telling the group just yet, but she wasn’t pretending things were the same with JJ either. There was distance now, but it was the kind of space that made it easier to breathe. And while Y/N still felt a little uncertain about what it meant for her friendship with the Pogues, she couldn’t help but feel lighter every time she was around them.
People noticed when she disappeared. Pope raised an eyebrow at her a couple of times, Kiara playfully asked if she was meeting some "mysterious boy," and JJ, though distant, was clearly still keeping an eye on her. But no one questioned it further. No one needed to know.
That afternoon, Y/N found herself back at the Chateau, where the gang had regrouped after a few days of avoiding serious conversations. The group was loud, as usual—Kiara pulling out an old map, Pope half-heartedly objecting to some of their more ridiculous ideas, and JJ getting a little too enthusiastic about a new "adventure" they could take. This time, it was JJ’s turn to suggest something chaotic.
“I’ve got it,” JJ said dramatically, eyes lighting up. “We go to the junkyard.”
Y/N shot him a raised eyebrow. “The junkyard? Really?”
“It’s perfect,” JJ continued, ignoring the questioning looks. “We could find treasure, make some plans for the summer, do something that actually makes us feel alive for once. Plus, there’s always weird stuff there—old cars, random bits of metal, who knows what we might find?”
Kiara perked up at the mention of treasure. “Could be a gold mine,” she added with a grin. “Or at least we can see if there’s any cool, rusty junk we can turn into art.”
Pope, who had been staring into the distance, suddenly broke into a mock frown. “The junkyard? Really? You guys are seriously trying to drag me into a place filled with piles of trash?”
JJ grinned, always ready to egg Pope on. “Come on, Pope. You can pretend to be the sophisticated one all you want, but deep down you know you want to get your hands dirty with the rest of us.”
Y/N laughed, leaning back on the couch. It was a sound she hadn’t realized she’d missed—her group, teasing and laughing with no tension. It felt like old times, before everything got complicated. Before she started feeling like she was on the outside of the group, watching as JJ and Kiara danced around each other and trying to figure out what her feelings for Rafe meant.
“I’m in,” Y/N said, sitting up and giving them a small grin. “Let’s go find some treasure.”
Pope, still grumbling, threw his hands up in defeat. “Fine. But I’m not getting stuck in any piles of scrap metal. I’m too smart for that.”
“Just remember that when I find something amazing, you’ll be the first to carry it for me,” JJ teased, already standing up and grabbing his jacket.
At that moment, John B, who had been lounging on the couch with a cup in hand, suddenly perked up. “Did someone say junkyard?” he asked, eyes wide with mock excitement. “That sounds like the kind of adventure I can get behind.”
Y/N shot him a grin. “You planning on driving us there, Captain?”
“Obviously.” John B tossed the cup aside, jumping to his feet. “The van’s ready. And if I’m driving, we’re making this a proper expedition. No half-assed treasure hunts on my watch.”
Kiara rolled her eyes but smiled at the enthusiasm. “Fine, fine. Let’s go then.”
The gang piled into the old, beat-up twinkie, heading off toward the junkyard. As they approached the site, the familiar scent of rust and oil filled the air. The place looked like something out of a post-apocalyptic movie, with broken-down cars, shattered glass, and twisted metal strewn across the dirt lot. The kind of place where nothing was useful, but everything had the potential for some kind of adventure.
“Alright,” JJ said, standing dramatically in front of the group, “let’s make this a scavenger hunt. First person to find the weirdest thing gets to claim the prize.”
“Prize?” Kiara asked, skeptically. “What, are we going to sell the trash we find?”
“Exactly,” JJ grinned. “Who says junk can’t be worth something?”
Pope rolled his eyes but couldn’t hold back a smirk. “This is ridiculous. But I’m game.”
Y/N watched John B, who was already surveying the junkyard with a mischievous grin. He had that familiar glint in his eyes—the same spark he always got when he was looking for trouble, and he wasn’t about to let JJ have all the fun. “Fine,” John B said, “but I’m getting the prize first.”
“You wish,” JJ shot back, already moving toward a stack of old tires. “I’m gonna find something epic.”
As they began to spread out, Y/N couldn’t help but feel lighter. She wasn’t thinking about JJ’s stupid pity kiss, or the constant tension that hung between them. She wasn’t worried about Rafe’s feelings either—he was the secret she didn’t have to explain, and she was content with that. For once, she was just part of the group again, her old self. The Pogue she used to be.
JJ sprinted toward an old car, shouting out, “I call dibs on this beauty!” and began rifling through the trunk, already making an absurd amount of noise. Kiara, Pope, and Y/N followed suit, though their finds were much more practical. Y/N pulled out a few rusted tools, giggling when Pope made a face at the mess she was digging through.
“You sure this is the best we’ve got?” Pope asked, his voice tinged with sarcasm but a hint of amusement.
“I don’t know,” Y/N said with a playful grin. “What’s your definition of treasure, Pope? Something shiny?”
“Exactly,” he said, half-smiling. “I’m all for finding treasure, but not garbage.”
“We’ll see about that,” Kiara called out from behind a pile of tires, already holding up a set of old neon lights she thought could be used for their next bonfire. “This could make a perfect addition to our party setup!”
Y/N watched as Kiara took charge of their little scavenger hunt, leading them through the junkyard with a sense of excitement that made the whole thing feel a little more like a real adventure. Pope was actually getting into it now, his competitive spirit taking over as he tried to beat JJ to whatever “treasure” he could find. JJ, of course, was already in his own world, imagining the junkyard as some sort of personal playground, where every broken thing was just a stepping stone to a bigger, better idea.
John B wandered off toward the far side of the yard, his eyes scanning the piles of junk for anything that might catch his eye. Y/N couldn’t help but smile at how natural it felt, watching the group fall into their old rhythm.
As they explored, laughing and tossing things aside, Y/N realized that it wasn’t just the junkyard that felt like home—it was this. It was being with these people. No matter how chaotic things got, no matter how much she didn’t know what she was doing with her own life, these were the people who always had her back
The sun blazes overhead as Y/N steps into the junkyard, eyes wide with excitement.
“This place is awesome!” Y/N exclaims, practically bouncing on her toes. “It’s like a treasure hunt, but better because it’s all free!”
Kiara chuckles beside her. “I mean, it’s not the best place for treasures, but yeah, you could find something cool.” She swats a crow feather out of her face.
John B, already leading the way, turns back with a grin. “Follow me, I know where the good stuff is.”
Y/N follows, practically bouncing with curiosity. “Okay, okay. Let’s see what’s in there.”
Pope, trailing behind, lets out a dramatic sigh. “Good stuff? In a junkyard? This is like a museum... for garbage.”
Y/N laughs, waving at a pile of old scrap metal. “Hey, you’d be surprised. There’s probably something worth a lot here, Pope. You never know!”
They reach the shed, and John B immediately tries to open the door. He pulls, pushes, and gives it a shoulder check, but it’s locked.
“Uh, guys,” John B mutters, frowning. “It’s locked.”
“Duh,” Pope replies, unimpressed. “It’s a shed. Who’s surprised?”
John B shrugs. “Well, this shed’s too interesting to leave alone. JJ, grab the crowbar. We’re getting in.”
JJ jumps into action, grinning. “This is gonna be fun.”
Pope looks around nervously. “This is a terrible idea. We’re gonna get caught.”
“Relax,” John B says, already walking back to make room for JJ. “It's fine. We’ll just—”
JJ pulls out the crowbar and gives it a couple of solid swings against the shed’s door. The sound of metal against metal echoes across the junkyard. On the third swing, the door creaks open with a groan, revealing the dark interior.
“Here we go!” JJ says, his grin widening. He steps into the shed like he just found buried treasure.
Y/N steps forward, eyes lighting up. “Okay, okay. Let’s see what’s in here.”
But as the group floods into the dimly lit shed, their excitement quickly fades. The place is stacked with nothing but junk—old furniture, broken tools, and boxes of random stuff, nothing of any real value. The walls are lined with old tires, discarded appliances, and garbage bags.
“What the hell?” Y/N says, her voice deflating. “This is... this is just junk.”
“I told you,” Pope mutters under his breath, crossing his arms. “Who in their right mind would call this ‘good stuff’?”
John B shrugs, undeterred. “Hey, sometimes the best finds are hidden under a pile of garbage.”
JJ pulls a dusty old television out of a box and wipes it off. “Look, I found this! I mean, it’s not working, but who wouldn’t want a retro TV in their house, right?”
Pope raises an eyebrow. “Uh, yeah, because that’s totally what I want—vintage junk.”
And then, the door slams shut.
Y/N spins around, eyes wide. “Uh, guys? The door just closed.”
Kiara, who’s looking around the room with increasing unease, says, “No way. We’re locked in? Are you kidding me?”
John B goes to grab the handle, but it’s stuck. “Great. Of course, the door’s stuck now.”
JJ, still casually rummaging through junk, stops and looks up. “Wait, seriously? We’re locked in?”
“Yeah, JJ!” Y/N says, her voice rising with a mix of panic and amusement. “We’re locked in. Look at this place. There’s no way out.”
Pope starts pacing, his calm demeanor cracking. “This is not happening. We’re literally locked in a shed in a junkyard.”
Kiara looks around, her eyes darting from one junk pile to the next. “Well, at least it’s not a stranger’s shed. I guess we could just chill... but, uh... still... someone has to come looking for us, right?”
Y/N starts laughing, despite the situation. “I mean, yeah. Worst case, we just start a new life in the junkyard. It's practically our new home now.”
JJ throws his hands up. “Yeah! We’ll live off moldy pizza boxes and tire swings. Total dream life!”
John B glares at him, half-annoyed, half-amused. “Guys, seriously, quit joking. We need to get out of here.”
“Right,” Pope mutters, pulling at the door again. “Maybe if we just pull it...”
The group tries everything—pulling, kicking, even trying to knock the door down, but nothing works. After several attempts, the group begins to lose their energy, and the silence hangs heavy for a moment.
“Okay, so we’re stuck in here,” John B says, flopping down onto an old recliner, his voice nonchalant. “This is officially our new hangout spot, I guess.”
Kiara glares at him. “This isn’t funny.”
“No, really,” John B grins, raising an eyebrow. “You guys remember that one time we got stuck in that abandoned house during that storm? Remember how much fun we had?”
Y/N snorts. “Yeah, except that house was less junk-y and more... ghost house.”
“I mean, this place is just as fun, right?” JJ says, flopping down next to her, pulling a rusted license plate out of a box. “We got old stuff. We got... character.” He waves it around like it's some kind of trophy.
“Sure,” Pope grumbles, “if by ‘character’ you mean ‘how many ways can you die while inside a shed full of junk.’”
John B suddenly jumps up. “Wait, I’ve got it. We break out the windows!”
Kiara looks at him like he’s lost his mind. “John B, that’s not a good idea—”
But John B is already going for it. “Just trust me!”
After a few attempts, they finally manage to break the window, with John B leading the charge. The group spills out into the sunlight, everyone covered in dirt and laughing like it’s no big deal.
“Well, that was an adventure,” Y/N says, brushing off her hands with a grin. “I guess we can cross ‘getting locked in a shed’ off our bucket list.”
Kiara punches her lightly on the arm. “Yeah, not on my list, but sure, let's count it.”
Pope straightens up, shaking his head. “That was a mess. But at least it was... interesting.”
John B slings his arm around Y/N's shoulders, laughing. “Another Tuesday with the Pogues. Couldn’t get any better, right?”
—
A/N: Pogues back to business as usual. Don’t worry—Rafe’ll be back next time. Please drop a thought if anything stuck out to you, I love hearing what you all think!
–
Next time: secrets don’t stay hidden for long
—
Taglist: @hockeybabe87 , @idiotussupremus , @certifiedhaters , @oatmealisweird, @sluggmuffin , @maybankslover , @ren-ni, @wh0reforbucknasty , @enjoymyloves , @bilssturns , @dragonslight , @willowpains , @sidney-86
#obx4#obx#outer banks rafe#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe outer banks#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x y/n#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank#jj x reader
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SOOBIN: “I thought I should just try to shine as I am.”
TOMORROW X TOGETHER The Star Chapter: SANCTUARY comeback interview
2024.11.11
He once strived to become a lush, towering forest. But he realized that people will love him for exactly what he is—a deep, rolling ocean. And so, he decided to remain as whom he always has been: an ocean named SOOBIN.
You took a trip to Vietnam earlier this year with BEOMGYU. I heard you planned the whole thing. SOOBIN: I’m usually the kind of person who just goes around without a real plan, but since we don’t get much vacation time, I figured we’d better go all out and do everything we could in one go, so I tried planning it all out. (laughs) BEOMGYU just wanted to go with the flow, but there was a ton of stuff I wanted to do.
I’m sure it’s not easy taking a trip or spending your off time with the same people you spend all your time with. SOOBIN: I hang out a lot with the rest of the group on my own time too, though. Three of us were all hanging out together just yesterday. To be perfectly honest, it doesn’t feel like anything special since we’re always together 365 days a year, but I’m also most comfortable around them for the same reason.
Sometimes people start bickering with each other when they get too comfortable with one another, but you’re always so kind—like how you gifted BEOMGYU with a nap in that “The Perfect Way to Rest” video when you remembered he was feeling tired. SOOBIN: I think I’m good at picking up on things. I don’t know if I can do it with everyone, but at least with the other members of the group, I’m pretty good at telling how they’re feeling or if they’re not feeling well. As soon as I see one of them, I can tell, Oh, he looks a little rough today, or, He’s sure in a good mood today. (laughs) If they seem down, I go over to them to find out what’s wrong and talk it over.
Your kindness also comes across when you’re with animals, like in the “OUR TOMORROW” video, where you took care of one dog who was so nervous that it didn’t get a chance to eat any treats. Have you always been drawn to people and creatures that are small and left out? SOOBIN: So, so much. In fact, I was really shy and struggled to fit in when I was a trainee. I was really lonely at first. So when time passed and I finally got accustomed to things, if I saw another trainee who was shy and couldn’t adjust, I felt like looking out for them. Kai was among them. (laughs) That’s how I ended up becoming really close with him.
You talked about the cat your sister adopted recently, explaining how it used to be shy because it had a hard life in the past but that it finally opened up this year. SOOBIN: I went to see the cat when my sister first got it, but I couldn’t even see it that first time—it just hid under the couch. It was so shy that I thought I’d never get to pet it, but the last time I saw it, it came right up to me and started purring, wanting to be petted. It was able to overcome its painful past and open up to my family thanks to all the love they show looking after it. Love really does have the power to change anything. (laughs)
You also said on weverse LIVE recently that you made a new friend who you can talk about dramas, movies, and books with. SOOBIN: For me, dramas and movies don’t end with watching them—after you’re done watching, that’s when things are just getting started. I always look up reviews and analyses online. People can watch the same thing and they’ll all have their own thoughts on it, so I’m curious about all those different views, and now I have someone to talk about that with. They know a lot more about books and movies than I do, so I end up learning a lot when we’re sharing our thoughts together. Just having a friend to share my interests with is really fun.
You mentioned talking about Inside Out 2, and you looked at how it features a place to store things you’ve heard that you want to keep for a long time, which got you thinking about what sort of things you would want to hold onto. SOOBIN: I kept recalling things my friends say after we hang out—things like, “SOOBIN, I’m so happy we’re friends,” and, “I feel great whenever I’m with you.” Hearing things like that really touches my heart. Seriously, how often do you get to hear things like that in life? I used to find expressing things like that awkward and weird, but thanks to my friends, I’m getting used to saying I love and appreciate people. You empathized with how Anxiety works harder and feels more anxious than others because they want to be good at things. Are there things you feel you should work harder at than other people? SOOBIN: I’m actually slower at learning choreography compared to the other members. I assumed I’d get a lot better after debuting and regularly performing onstage, but progress was slower than I expected. I didn’t say anything about this before, and I even kept it a secret from the other members, but I actually got separate choreo lessons on the side when we were doing “Chasing That Feeling” and “Deja Vu.” We’d take lessons as a group, and then once I was alone I’d always spend about an hour dancing and working on the little details. I tried so hard with those two most recent songs that I even practiced on my own like that. Seeing as I’m slow, I have to work harder to keep up with the other members. If I have more time, I want to practice more for this comeback, too.
With all the touring you’ve done and the encore performances you have coming up, it must’ve been really hectic getting ready for your Star Chapter: SANCTUARY comeback. SOOBIN: The schedule was really tight this time around—we even had to record vocals in Japan in the middle of the tour since we were in and out of the country—but now that we’re in our sixth year, the five of us were all really fast about things. I could sense that we had grown compared to before since we were faster at recording than we could’ve expected to be in the past and it took us less time to work out the details of the choreography.
The album’s subtitle, SANCTUARY, is a word that’s appeared in TOMORROW X TOGETHER albums before. What’s been your sanctuary these days? SOOBIN: I never used to have a sanctuary, which made getting through tough times hard, but I do now: simple things like working out or reading. It feels like the things that break me away from overthinking and let me immerse myself in something else are my sanctuary.
You were complimented on your previous promotions for your improved vocals and high notes. What about on this album? SOOBIN: Actually, every other album we’ve done had a song in a genre I wasn’t confident in, but not this time. The single “Over The Moon” is really laid-back, and I felt like it was perfect timing for us to try out a song like that. What’s unfortunate is that I caught this horrendous cold during recording. We started practicing for live performances recently, and the director said, “SOOBIN’s singing better than he did when recording. He makes it sound effortless.” So I couldn’t help but think about how much better I could’ve done if only my throat had been in better shape.
You always focus a lot on lyrics. Were there any on this album that have stuck with you in particular? SOOBIN: This album isn’t so much about telling some big, sweeping story as it is about everything we’ve been through together. Now that we’ve been through all that chaos, it’s about the universal emotion of love, which everyone can relate to, and I liked that about it. There’s a line in “Higher Than Heaven” that sticks with me that goes, “I think I kinda get what forever means now.” I even once said, “I never used to believe in the word ‘forever,’ but I think I can now, thanks to our fans.” I didn’t write that part, but it’s like it was written to perfectly capture my feelings.
The other members have probably had an impact on your belief in the word “forever,” too. SOOBIN: I’m pretty sure we’re going to grow old together and that we’ll be together till the day I die. We do the same thing and basically live the same life day in and day out, so we know what makes each other cry the most during concerts, too. Whether it’s my tears of happiness or BEOMGYU’s tears of disappointment from a leg injury, having friends to understand and share those feelings with is nice. They’re all just really kind people—calm and clear, like a stream. None of us is domineering or splashing around, disturbing the peace, and nobody’s dirtying the water, so I think we’ll be able to stick together for a long, long time.
You said before that you had found being onstage tough while touring. Now that you’ve already wrapped up your third world tour, do you still find that to be the case? SOOBIN: I think I’m getting better over time. I still can’t say that I completely enjoy myself, but the worries I used to have before going onstage have gone away entirely. There used to be times where I found it hard to watch myself onstage because I didn’t like how I looked, but now I see myself up there and I think I look cool. (laughs)
The way you have a different outfit on for every sound check when you’re on tour is definitely cool. SOOBIN: For fans who come even though they’re busy, showing up hours before the concert just to wait, doing it purely out of love, I wanted to be more stylish, so I bought a lot of clothes just for sound checks. The glasses-plus-cardigan combo was something I bought in advance for summer, and the reaction from the audience was amazing! They showed me on the big screen and MOA was screaming their lungs out—like, not the usual “wow,” but, “aah!” Like shock and awe. (laughs) I was worried I went overboard with the look, but they showed they liked it, so I was happy.
There’s no way not to bring up your cover of the Choi Yu Ree song “Forest” when talking about you. You said that the people around you are like tall trees in a forest and that you thought you’re one of them, but that you figured out you’re actually more like the ocean. SOOBIN: It’s easy to find people around me who are better looking and sing and dance better than I do. I actually started thinking about that at Lollapalooza. The other members looked so happy and like they were having so much fun onstage, but I couldn’t. I felt eaten up inside seeing myself not being able to fully enjoy it because of all the pressure. Then I heard Choi Yu Ree explaining that “Forest” is about feeling like you’re not good enough and I thought, “Ah, so that’s what I’ve been going through.” I started to understand my emotions a little bit better. Everyone ends up comparing themselves to others at some point in their lives—it’s unavoidable. And they have times where all they can see are the things they hate about themselves, but it’s ridiculous. I was overflowing with negative feelings when I was working on my “Forest” cover, and I wanted to sort of deal with those feelings and express them.
The music video echoes your thoughts that someday you’ll come to shore and become one with the forest. What does the forest mean to you? SOOBIN: Just being a singer who’s good at singing and dancing, interacting with my fans, enjoying performing, and being able to do it all with complete sincerity. I think I was showing how the forest to me means being happy with the other members when they’re happy. Nothing big—just simple things I’m not always that good at.
Do you feel more like a forest now that some time has gone by? SOOBIN: Umm … I saw a ton of comments from fans after I covered “Forest.” My mindset when I was doing it was, Right now I’m like the ocean, but I’ll become a part of the forest just like you guys—so wait for me until then. But once I saw what fans were writing, I changed my mind and thought, Do I really need to become a part of the forest? I could be similar to the forest, but I don’t have to change myself to be one. My fans kept saying, “The whole reason we liked you in the first place is because you’re like the ocean, not because we hoped you’d become like a forest. If that were the case, we’d like somebody else. Why do you think it was you?” The ocean comes with its own perks, you know. You need to have some ocean near a forest to add to the scenery and have more things to do. Now I think maybe I tried too hard to fit in by trying to be like the forest. Now I feel like I can shine bright just by being myself.
That lines up with what you recently said in an interview you did in Japan when you said that your 20s, the best and most energetic time of life, are dazzling and fun thanks to knowing MOA. What do you think you’ll see when you look back on this youthful period of your 20s? SOOBIN: Joy. Every moment of our lives is packed with good times and bad times, joy and sorrow, but in the end, I think, I’m on a path towards joy. Even things that are so agonizing that you want to die—so bad you feel like the whole world is against you, and so bad you’re certain they’re weighing on you forever, eventually pass.
Doesn’t it almost feel funny sometimes, looking back after all that? (laughs) SOOBIN: Yes. It ends up feeling so trivial somehow. Things that felt massive at the time are like a speck in the distance once you get even a little space between them and yourself. Even after all the hardship I went through being a trainee, I can look back now and see there were a lot of good times. Maybe we tend to romanticize the past a bit? (laughs) Even some of the stuff I’m going through now can be tough, to be honest, but I’m never going to give up. There’s still so much I want to give. The amount of joy I derive from doing this is way higher than the amount of difficulty. I think my life’s amazing, even right now.
So amazing. (laughs) SOOBIN: I think so too! (laughs) As time goes on and I get older, when I look back on my youth, my time with TOMORROW X TOGETHER, I wonder if it’ll look that much more shiny and amazing. Maybe I’ll feel I was even cooler at this time than I feel I am now.
#txt#tomorrow x together#241111#weverse#soobin#choi soobin#weverse magazine#the star chapter#sanctuary
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Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 10
Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.
Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications
Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here
WARNING: This is a long chapter
First - Prev - Next
Ch.10
“Do you remember how you came to Gravity Falls in the first place?”
“I was just passing by.”
“Yes, but this town is isolated, and you have no means of transportation.”
“Trainhopping, I was hiding on a train for two days I think, maybe three? Decided to jump off here.”
“Do you know why you decided to do that here, and not anywhere else?”
“...”
“Stan?”
“It’s funny, specs - a couple months back, I’d already been with my pal Rick for a while, right? Just one heist, escapade, or criminal venture after another, for seven months straight. And it was great while it lasted, but then he asked me if I wanted to stay with him in another dim- someplace far away. And I wanted to, ya know? There’s always been this itch in the back of my mind that I wanted to go around the world on some grand adventure, and he was offering that to me on a silver platter. But I told him no.”
“And why was that, Stan?”
“...It’s stupid.”
“I wouldn’t call any of your reasoning stupid, I’m not here to judge you.”
“...I always wanted to go on an adventure- but something was missing. It’s like- I dunno if it’s intuition or some spiritual mumbo jumbo, it’s like I’m looking for something. But I don’t know what I’m looking for.”
“Do you have an idea what it could be?”
“A part of… me? I’m missing something. Not just my memories- but something else. I think I might have made a promise, I just… don’t remember what it was, or who I promised to. I guess I’ve been drifting around trying to find it.”
“And you felt it was in Gravity Falls?”
“I don’t… I don’t know. There’s something weird here… I just wanted to check this place out, is all.”
“I see. What did you say your relationship with this Rick was like?”
“You don’t need to be jealous, F. We were just friends. Okay, maybe we were kind of an item for a week at most, but that guy isn’t just self-destructive; he’s like a train that wrecks onto a freeway, he can never just destroy himself, he has to wreck the people around him too and create an absolute shit show. Even I have a limit with that shit.”
“You really need to stop putting yourself down like that, Stan. You only ever seem to say negative things about yourself, it ain’t good for you.”
“There isn’t anything good to say, stretch.”
“Don’t sell yourself one egg short of a basket, now. Y’know, your-. Uh, Stanford was telling me that you’re quite clever. He used a trick to get you down here in the first place, but he also said that he wouldn’t be able to trick you again.”
“I should have seen his fake-out coming… I’ll give it to him, it was a good one. But I’m not going to underestimate him, because crazy like his should never be underestimated. What’s he up to anyways? He went to that room that’s always locked.”
“That’s his private study. I believe he goes there when he wants to be alone.”
“...Didn’t he live by himself? Why did he already have that?”
“Can’t say, maybe it’s a quiet and calm space for him.”
(...)
“HE HAS RISEN BABY GIRL.”
“Bill, please stop calling me that. It’s unprofessional.”
“Come on Sixer, at least let the Goo Goo Dolls soundtrack play.”
“The what?”
“Ooop! My bad, it’s not 1998 or 2024 yet. How can I help you today, Fordsy? You haven’t called me in a few weeks.”
“There’s a mindscape I need to access.”
“Oh boy, it’s not usually you who wants to poke around other humans' brains, always prattling on about ethics and consent. What’s the occasion?”
“...You know everything I know when we’re in the mindscape, you already know the answer.”
“Yes, but I still want you to say it out loud. Clearly and concisely, so your dialogue can be read on screen.”
“... I need to get into the mind of my brother, Stanley. He has amnesia, and our leading theory is that it’s due to psychological trauma. But he has been through so much trauma we’re having trouble isolating the definitive event that would have started this.”
“And why wouldn’t he just share that with his beloved twin brother?”
“He does not remember me.”
“Oooh, then he is just like you! Isn't it just precious when twins are twinning?”
“I never forgot about him.”
“Oh Sixer… You might as well have.”
“Just take me to his mind, Cipher… Please.”
“Anything for you, baby boy!”
SNAP
(...)
“So your memories are only clear to a certain point?”
“Yeah. Rick found me wandering around the woods in a ‘catatonic state’, and snapped me out of it. Everything before that… I can remember being on the street, I can remember all the stuff I did, maybe out to a decade? But there’s a lot of holes, lotsa different names I used. And before the streets? Nothing.”
“And when did Rick find you in the woods?”
“What month is it?”
“June.”
“Last May - so about 13 months?”
(...)
“Okay Fordsy he hasn’t made a deal with me so we can’t go too deep, or his mental defenses are just gonna shove us out.”
“Bill, I already know that, why are you explaining it to me?”
“You know; doesn’t mean they know. Unless this is a re-read. In which case; welcome back. Glad you loved or hated it the first time.”
“You are… Beyond comprehension, Bill Cipher.”
“That’s what you love about me though.”
“You have my begrudging, professional respect.”
“From your aspec ass, that’s practically love.”
“Aspe-”
“Oooh! Lookie here, a memory door opened up. He must be opening up to someone right now. Let's barge in haphazardly.”
(...)
“Okay Stan, this might be difficult. But if you ever feel distressed, let me know and we can try grounding techniques okay?’
“You got it, F.”
“Now close your eyes, think back to when you and Rick parted ways.”
(...)
“Sanchez?! How does Stan know-.”
“You know this hilarious crossover character? I already know the answer, but for no particular reason I need you to tell me out loud how you know him.”
“His wife Diane was part one of my PhD programs. She was always so bright and pleasant, but her husband was a nightmare when she brought him around. He was always saying that school wasn’t for smart people, and rubbed his inventions and intelligence in our face.”
“And how is she these days?”
“She passed away from a garage fire a few years ago, her and her little girl. I almost sent him a condolences, but he was such an unpleasant asshole I could not make myself do so.”
“Come on Stan- think about it! You, me, Bird Person, Squanchy- sci-fi adventures, drugs, bitches. Whattaya say? Let’s ditch this dimension, there isn’t anything for us here anymore.”
“Dimension-?”
“Shh, Fordsy, just let it play out.”
“I… I can’t Rick.”
“Why not?”
“There’s… something here.”
“Did you remember something?”
“I don’t remember who, but I think I’m looking for someone.”
“Stanny-Boy, we’ve been through this before. No one knows you, everywhere we’ve been, ‘cept for the fake names. You should just cut your losses.”
“Wherever we go, we go together.”
“What was that-?”
“Just the distorted voice of his subconscious. It’s probably not important.”
“I’m sorry. But there’s a piece of me missing, and I think it’s still here in this dimension somewhere.”
“You know your credits don’t have monetary value here.”
“I know.”
“And I can’t leave you a space cruiser. You’ll have to walk or steal a car.”
“Either is fine. I’ve done it before.”
“Stan… Are you sure?”
“Here. Take all my credits, you’ll get more out of it than me.”
“You want your dusters back?”
“Trade me.”
“Wait, you don’t want your transdimensional watch anymore?”
“If the pigs catch me, I don’t need them asking too many questions.”
“You know that doesn’t just give you dimensional coordinates and time zones, right? There’s a pulse wave in it that can shatter force fields.”
“Pft, what are the chances I’d ever need that?”
“Ooof, he really fumbled the bag there.”
“My muse, please.”
*Rick takes the watch and gives Stan a pair of brass knuckles*
“Thanks Rick… Hey, it was nice while it lasted.”
“Hope you find what you’re looking for.”
“I hope you find that bastard, Prime. Give him the hell he deserves.”
“...Stan?”
“Yeah?”
“Fuck you.”
“I’ll miss you too, pal.”
(...)
“Alright, how are you feeling Stan?”
“So far so good.”
“Okay, now let’s go further back. You said your first clear memory is when you met him, let’s go back to that.”
“I was in the back of his shi- iiitty car, I felt like I’d just smoked an entire carton of cigarettes, but in a bad way..”
(...)
“It just- stopped?”
“He’s remembering something else. Just look for another door.”
“Here we go.”
“Wha- where…?”
“Oh hey you’re awake.”
“-’re, you?”
“You’re one tough son of a bitch, y’know? Most of the people I tase end up dead, but you just passed out.”
“You… tased me? Are you a cop?”
“Hell no. I tased you because you attacked me in the woods. Damn near ripped my head off.”
“The woods..?”
“You were wandering around in a catatonic state, can’t tell you how long.”
“A what state?”
“This isn’t going anywhere. Can you tell me your name?”
“It’s…? I... Malone. Wait. It’s- Stan.”
“Stan Malone huh? My name’s Rick Sanchez.”
(...)
“Stan keep your eyes closed. I want you to try to remember what happened before this.”
“Alright…”
“What’s something you can remember? Something you saw, felt, heard?”
“My chest felt really tight…”
(...)
“What is this?”
“Ahh. A pit memory. This is something his brain wants to forget, but can’t permanently delete.”
“So it is a repressed memory?”
“Yes. He’s trying to think about it… but unconsciously, he really doesn’t want to.”
“What happens if we jump in?”
“Sixer, where's your sense of adventure? If it gets too dangerous I’ll just pull us out.”
“Do you swear?”
“Just gimme the word.”
“Which word?”
“Let’s go with ‘defenestrate’ this time.”
‘W̷̷H̷̷Y̷ ̷I̷̷S̷̷N̷'̷T̷ ̷I̷̷T̷ ̷W̷̷O̷̷R̷̷K̷̷I̷̷N̷̷G̷?! ̷W̷̷H̷̷Y̷-?’
S̷̷C̷̷R̷̷E̷̷E̷̷C̷̷H̷
‘̷C̷̷a̷̷n̷’̷t̷-’
‘̷t̷̷r̷̷a̷̷p̷̷p̷̷e̷̷d̷’
‘̷c̷̷a̷̷n̷’̷t̷ ̷b̷̷r̷̷e̷̷a̷̷t̷̷h̷̷e̷-’
*brief flash of a pile of burnt paper ash in Stan’s hands, which are shaking*
“We can’t stay here Fordsy, he’s closing up again.”
“Just one more second-!”
“Might as well, it’s [--- ---- ------ - ---].”
“[--- ---] going to die here. Stan[--- -------- -----], if you don’t [---- - ---- ---- --] in the next minute you will die.”
“That voice-?”
“We’re leaving now, Sixer! DEFENESTRATE!”
SNAP
(...)
“Stan? Stan calm down-! It’s okay! Remember where you are.”
“C-Can’t breathe-”
“Yes you can, just breathe with me. In- out. In- out. Just like that. There we go.”
“I’m sorry Fiddleford, I can’t do it. I can’t. I can’t. ”
To be continued…
#for your own good#early amnesia au#mystery trio#fords evil basement sub-lab#ford isnt a mad scientist hes a sad scientist#gravity falls#cross posted on ao3#fanfic#fanfiction#stanley pines#stan pines#stanford pines#ford pines#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#fiddleford mcgucket#bill cipher#rick sanchez#diane sanchez#past stanchez#fiddlestan#anyone notice that Stan called Fiddleford by his actual name
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Bad Idea - Pt 2
Synopsis: Your step-brother is in debt to Rafe Cameron. Knowing he won’t be able to pay Rafe back, you step up. What a bad idea.
18+
Series content warning – swearing, slow burn, depictions of aggression, jealousy, drug usage, violence, underage drinking, smut
Chapter content warning – mentions of drug usage, violence, aggression, underage drinking
pt 1
***
The Wreck was generally always slammed. It was reliable work and the owners were nice enough to guarantee you shifts when you were home from college. You never seemed to have a moment to relax on your shifts due to how busy it was.
Except for today.
Of all days, of course today was the one day it was slower than normal. Why wouldn’t it be? Obviously, life had it out for you.
It was so slow that your friends were able to come visit you at work. Even crazier, you had time to actually sit down and talk to them.
“I say you shouldn’t bail Carson out.” Lacey shrugged. “He’s always pulling you into shit.”
“You didn’t see him.” You shook your head at her. “It was really bad. I think his nose might be broken.”
Caroline took another fry from their shared plate before saying, “I’m with Lacey. Remember when he threw that party in high school and was ‘too hung over’ to clean up? You spent, like, the whole day cleaning so that he wouldn’t get caught.”
Lacey snorted and dipped her fry in ketchup. “Which time?”
You rolled your eyes. “He’s family.”
“He’s your step-brother.” Lacey deadpanned.
Caroline lightly nudged her. “Chill.”
“I’m just saying.” Lacey held her hands up in defense. “You didn’t know him like 3 years ago.”
“I didn’t know you back then either.” You pointed out. “I would do this for you guys, too.”
Lacey and Caroline were among the first friends that you met when you transferred to the private school. Your friendship with them solidified when all three of you decided to go to the same college. Lacey and Caroline were roommates.
“Oh shit,” Lacey laughed. She looked past you towards the entrance then back at you. “Guess who just showed up.”
Your first instinct told you that it was Carson, but when you turned your head you were met with an intimidating set of blue eyes. You immediately slid down in the booth hoping that he wouldn’t notice you yet.
“Maybe he’s just here for food.” Caroline suggested.
“Yeah, for sure.” Your voice dripped with sarcasm. “I’m sure him showing up to my place of work within the last hour of us being open has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I owe him money.”
“Sorry for being optimistic,” Caroline mumbled.
You groaned, bringing both hands up to rub your face. “I thought he was gonna show up to my house again after my shift. I didn’t think he’d come here.” Though, you had no idea why you never considered this possibility.
“Maybe he was excited to see you.” Lacey teased. She laughed a bit. “He just couldn’t wait.”
You couldn’t help but crack a grin at Lacey’s joke. “No one can resist my charm.”
You felt yourself tense up when you saw the host approaching you with an apologetic look on her face.
“Hey, sorry, I don’t mean to interrupt, but you just got seated.” She told you.
You sighed and nodded your head. “Thanks, Elliot.” When the girl left, you turned to your friends. “I’m assuming he’s going to wait until the end of my shift when I get paid. You guys can go ahead and leave. I’ll meet y’all the Boneyard later.”
Caroline looked at you with a small frown on her face. “Are you sure? I wanted us all to ride together.”
You smiled at her. You appreciated that she was hesitant about going without you.
“Yeah, it’s fine. I’d have to shower anyway. I don’t wanna make y’all wait on me.” You reassured her. “If you guys want, you can uber there and I can still DD on the way home.”
Lacey tapped her rings against the plastic cup. “Maybe Noah could take us.” She suggested. “That way we wouldn’t have to pay for an Uber.”
You stood up from the table, picking up your notepad and pen. “Sure, if you can convince him.”
In the 8 months you had been dating Noah, he only attempted to DD once. That attempt ended in you forcing him to leave his truck at the bar due to the several beers he had ended up having.
Lacey smiled at you, “Great.”
As your friends left, you turned to where Rafe was sitting. You felt dread settling into the pit of you stomach. He hadn’t seen you yet, since he was on his phone. You tried to remind yourself of Caroline’s optimism. Maybe he did actually want to eat something.
Doubtful. But it was a possibility.
You forced a polite smile on your face and walked to Rafe’s table.
“Hey, Rafe.” You greeted. “Can I get you something to drink?”
Rafe looked up at you, studying your face. You did your best not to let your smile falter. He watched you for an awkwardly long period of time. You began to shift uncomfortably on your feet.
“I can give you a minute if you want.” You offered.
“Do you honestly think I’m here for food?” Rafe asked.
You clicked your pen closed and dropped your arms in an exasperated manner. All pretenses of being polite were immediately dropped.
“I don’t know, Rafe.” You sighed. “I’m trying not to make any assumptions about your character.”
He slightly narrowed his eyes at you. “And what assumptions do you already have about ‘my character’?”
Jackass. Womanizer. Jerk. Spoiled. Dick–
“I try not to judge people before I know them.” You settled with.
He let out an amused chuckle. “Right.’
“If you’re here for my money you’re gonna have to wait.“ You told him. “I probably won’t be able to leave for another hour and a half. You might as well get something to eat before the kitchen closes.”
Rafe leaned his head back, scratching his neck like he was annoyed at the whole situation.
“I’ll just take some fries then.”
You blinked, not actually expecting him to get anything. You half expected him to make some comment about waiting for you at your house or outside or something.
“Oh. Sure.” You quickly scribbled it down to give to the kitchen.
“And I’m not tipping you.”
This time you did roll your eyes. “I assumed.” You clicked your pen closed and walked to the kitchen.
Fries were normally ready pretty much every moment of the day due to the popularity of it. You got them within 30 seconds of asking one of the line cooks. You could go back and give Rafe his fries quickly.
Or you could make him wait.
You slowly smiled to yourself, thinking about it.
You weren’t going to make him wait too long in reality. The kitchen was hot and the cooks were cranky, so you didn’t want to be back there. You were also still a little scared of Rafe. Not a lot, but enough to where you didn’t want to piss him off too much. But the few extra minutes of defiance for some reason felt so good.
You came back out to Rafe, placing his plate and water on the table. He picked up a fry, inspecting it.
“What are you doing?” You asked.
He shrugged. “Making sure you didn’t spit in my food.”
You crossed your arms, offended. “I wouldn’t do that.” You scoffed, then added, “And that’d be obvious on fries. If I wanted my spit to go unnoticed then I would’ve done it in your water.” You tapped your temple a couple times. “You gotta think about these things.”
Rafe looked at you skeptically. “Did you spit in my water?”
“I don’t know.” You shrugged. “Guess you’ll have to find out.”
Rafe rolled his eyes in response before eating another fry.
The rest of your shift dragged on. Eventually, Rafe moved to wait on the bench just outside the entrance. You were grateful that you didn’t have to delay any of your closing responsibilities for him.
After tipping out the bar, the kitchen, and the host, you had nearly $250 that you were able to give Rafe in addition to the $350 you had from the day prior. There was a very small amount you were allowing to keep for yourself, but he didn’t need to know that.
You frowned as you looked around the restaurant, wishing there was something else you could do to stall the inevitable. Sighing, you told the bar a quick “goodnight” and went outside to meet Rafe.
Irritatingly, he didn’t even acknowledge your presence. He continued to text on his phone. You held out the money in front of his screen wordlessly to get his attention.
“Pleasure doing business with you.” Rafe drawled.
You opened your mouth to give a snarky reply, but you held back. You just wanted to be done for the day. Giving a tight lipped smile, you spun on your heel to leave.
“Hold up.” His words made you pause in step.
You shut your eyes in frustration when you heard him start counting the money to himself. You turned around to face him again.
“This isn’t even $600. Where’s the rest?”
“I’m working again Wednesday. I can pay you whatever’s left then.”
Rafe shook his head, laughing. “That wasn’t the deal.”
You crossed your arms, feeling anger bubble in your chest. Technically, you didn’t owe Rafe anything. This wasn’t your debt to pay. Rafe was only getting the money from you because obviously he wasn’t going to get it from your step-brother.
There was an extra $20 you could give him, but it was the principle that made you not want to. You knew you should keep quiet, or maybe even apologize, but you always had a thing with anger. After all, you were your father’s daughter.
“We never had a deal. Maybe if you did something better with your life besides dealing drugs then you wouldn’t be in this position in the first place.”
Rafe’s face went blank for a moment. It was a terrifying neutral that should’ve been your hint to start running, but you knew from experience that running from someone’s anger would only make it worse. You tried to keep your face passive, but you couldn’t help but to take a step back when Rafe stood up to tower over you. You stared at his chest not wanting to meet his eye.
“You wanna try saying some shit again?” He asked. You clenched your jaw and continued to stare straight at his chest. “Huh? You want me to get the rest from your brother?” Rafe pressed.
“I don’t have anything else. I can get you the rest Wednesday.”
“I’m not waiting until Wednesday.”
God, he was so impatient. You’d think someone like him would be fine waiting a few days for $150. It was almost like he actually needed the money.
You blinked, the sudden realization crashing down on you.
Did Rafe need the money?
If you basically shamed him for sounding desperate, would he back down? Your heart sped up as you contemplated trying out your theory. You swallowed nervously before speaking.
“I mean, if you really need the money, I can check my car to see if I have any extra lying around.” You tried your best to keep your tone as innocent as possible.
Rafe narrowed his eyes at you. “I don’t need anything, pogue.”
You felt a little more confident, feeling as if your plan was working. “Sorry,” you said. “Just trying to be nice.”
Rafe stared at you for a long, lingering moment. For a second, you were scared he would hear how loud your heart was beating.
You began to wonder if you had pushed your luck too much tonight. What if he ended up taking his anger out on Carson?
The silence was loud, the way he was watching you was even louder. After those deafening few minutes, Rafe left without another word.
You let out a loud breath you didn’t realize had been holding.
***
“There she is!” Noah cheered with a slurred voiced.
The Boneyard was in full swing by the time you had showered, gotten dressed, and driven over. Carson was at the house and there was no sign that Rafe had been there to harass him, so you considered your earlier interaction with the kook king a small victory.
You laughed at the way Noah was swaying a bit. “Yeah – you’re welcome.” You joked. “The party can officially start now.”
“Noah–” Lacey stumbled up to you and your boyfriend with a wide grin. Her smile slightly faltered when she saw you. “Oh, you’re here! I was just about to ask Noah where you were.”
“I’m here.” You smiled. “I like your top.”
“Thanks.” Was all she said in return. You had expected her to start talking about where she had gotten it from. She loved talking about that kind of stuff. Instead, the three of you stood in silence. You weren’t sure why, but you began slowly nodding your head.
“I’m gonna go get a drink.” You announced. “I’ll be right back.” You just wanted to rid yourself of the awkward atmosphere.
You greeted a few people on the way to the cooler you spotted upon arrival. You grabbed one of the water bottles for yourself since you knew you were going to be driving everyone home later.
“Hey, pogue!”
The familiar voice made you tense up, and you felt torn between rolling your eyes and shooting him your middle finger, or leaving the Boneyard all together to avoid confrontation. Unfortunately, your indecision gave Rafe enough time to catch up to you.
God, you just couldn’t get rid of this guy.
“I have a proposition for you.”
“Big word,” You mumbled low enough so that he wouldn’t hear.
“You still owe me $150, yeah?”
You didn’t really want to answer him. He already knew this. You eyed him warily.
“You’ll get the rest on Wednesday–”
“Here’s the deal,” Rafe interrupted. “I’m not waiting that long.”
You crossed your arms, shrugging. “Well, I can’t get you any more money until then, and my brother definitely can’t. So…” You trailed off.
“So,” Rafe began. “That’s where my proposition comes in.”
You continued to eye him, hesitantly. You weren’t sure where he was going with this.
Rafe continued, “There’s a party tomorrow night. If you show up and help promote the shit I’m selling, I won’t go after your brother for you not paying me the rest tonight.”
You stayed silent and tried your best to ignore the protest that was forming in your mouth.
This wasn’t fair. But he knew that. He knew it wasn’t fair — that this wasn’t even your debt to pay. Rafe just didn’t care.
“I don’t want to help you sell drugs–” You tried to say.
“You’re being dramatic.” He scoffed. “All you’d need to do is tell people where I am and what I have.”
“I really don’t want to be involved in that.”
“You’re already involved.”
“Rafe–”
“Everything good over here?”
Both you and Rafe turned your heads to see Noah quickly approaching. He had a hardened expression on his face. He made direct eye contact with you. “Is he bothering you?”
“None of your concern, Williams.” Rafe waved him off.
You eyes flickered between Noah and Rafe, concerned about where this was headed. Noah was obviously wasted already. He was always a tad on the aggressive side when drinking. Rafe was…Rafe. This could end very badly very fast.
“Nah, I think it is my concern, man.” Noah began to invade Rafe’s personal space. “Since I heard you’ve been harassing my girlfriend.”
Briefly, you wondered who had filled him in on the situation. You hadn’t told him about what happened the night prior.
“Noah, it’s fine.” You told him. “Let’s just go back to everyone else.” You lightly took hold of Noah’s arm to lead him away.
“Yeah, Noah.” Rafe grinned mockingly. “We’re good.”
You shut your eyes in annoyance. Rafe’s condescending attitude wasn’t helping anything. Without a second thought, Noah ripped his arm out of your grip.
“Oh, we’re good?” Noah stepped up to Rafe again.
“Noah–” You tried to protest.
“Yeah,” Rafe antagonized. He nodded over at you. “Your girlfriend thinks we’re good.” Noah clenched his jaw at the comment.
You rolled your eyes at the comment. “Stop trying to instigate. You’re really bad at it.” He was actually good at it, but you wanted to get under his skin. “Noah, let’s go.”
Noah continued to glare at Rafe, but when you tugged at his arm, Noah began to leave with you.
“Yeah, that’s right!” Rafe called out at the two of you. “Follow her like a bitch!”
Noah ripped away from you faster than you could process.
“Hey–”! You started to protest.
Your yell cut out with a startled gasp when Noah swung at Rafe. You stumbled back, not wanting to be in the area of impact.
A crowd started forming quickly from the commotion. Caroline caught up to you fast.
“What happened?” She rushed out.
An irritated expression formed on your face remembering the events leading up to this. You kissed your teeth. “Testosterone.” You tore your eyes away from the boys to look at your friend. “Where’s Lacey?”
“She went to get her sweatshirt out of Noah’s car.” Caroline told her. They both flinched when Rafe tackled Noah to the ground. Now on top of him, Rafe began punching Noah in the face with an open fist.
You looked around at everyone who was either egging on the fight or filming. Some were doing both.
“Is no one gonna do anything?” You asked, exasperated.
Caroline scoffed. “You mean, is anyone going to get involved in a fight with Rafe Cameron?” She threw back at you.
You grimaced as the fight moved towards the water. You began to take a step forward, but Caroline shot her hand out to stop you. “Terrible idea – truly.”
Noah suddenly broke himself free of Rafe’s hold. “What’s up, Cameron? Your daddy’s passing you over as president so now you’re acting out?” He taunted. “Is that it?”
Your eyes widened at Noah. He was definitely only making the situation worse.
Rafe lunged at Noah again, gripping his shirt in tight hold. He shoved Noah to the ground before slamming his fist in your boyfriend’s face over and over. Your breath hitched in your throat, you felt your nerves seeping into your lungs. This was going from bad to worse.
Lacey ran up to you and Caroline. “What happened?!” She exclaimed. “I left for literally five minutes!”
“What do we do?” Caroline panicked.
You brought both hands up to your face and ran them over the top of your head. You didn’t know what you were going to do. You had pulled Noah out of dumb bar fights before, but none of them were as bad as this one.
You tried your best to focus, but your head was going fuzzy. Noah’s movements became slower, filling you with dread. For a moment, you were legitimately worried that Rafe would kill him.
“Hey, Rafe! You did enough!” You recognized one of Rafe’s friends push forward from the crowd. “Hey – chill out!” His friend got a hold of Rafe. He must’ve been severely out of it. Rafe nearly swung at him.
“Stay out of this, Top!” He shoved his friend back.
Suddenly the sounds of the crowd were broken up by the louder sounds of sirens.
“The cops are here!” You heard someone yell. More people began to yell out the arrival the police.
You used the opportunity to rush over to your boyfriend.
“Noah?” You crouched to your knees so that you could get a better look at him. Noah slowly blinked his eyes, but didn’t address you. His face was nearly unrecognizable. Your heart dropped to your stomach. “Noah!” You raised your voice to get his attention. “Can you hear me?
He still wasn’t answering, no matter how much you pleaded. You cursed under your breath. You took his arm and slung it over your shoulder to try and pull him up, but he was too heavy for you.
“Hey, hey. Let me help.” You looked up to see a guy that you recognized from the private school. He got on the other side of Noah and helped you lift him up.
“Thank you,” You breathed out.
“Don’t mention it.” He grunted out.
“Lacey, do you still have his keys?” You asked as you approached your friends again.
“Yeah, I got ‘em.” Her voice was panicked. “Is he okay?”
“Can you unlock his car and push down the back seats? We’re gonna need to lay him down.”
Lacey shot you and Noah one more worried look before sprinting to where the car was parked.
You weren’t sure how long it took you to get Noah to his car, but you were scared out of your mind the whole time. Caroline opened the door to the backset and you laid him down with the help of the guy from high school.
You closed the door on him and ran to the drivers seat. You were going to have to leave your car here and hope for the best.
“I’m gonna have to take him back to mine.” You didn’t really say to anyone specific. You just felt like you needed to talk or you would start spiraling. “His parents can’t see him like this.”
“We can stay over, too.” Lacey offered.
You didn’t say anything in response, you only started the engine. You looked ahead down the street to see everyone running to their cars or into the nearby trees. You paused on the one person looking your way.
That pair of intimidating eyes you never could escape was holding you ransom.
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Great thoughts here, and I just wanted to add a little to what OP said here because it’s something I’ve been thinking over. I also was very unsatisfied with how they ended things. I was absolutely expecting some variation of what we got, at least as far as the “I’m your first” but I really expected them to resolve it. For Buck to fight. And I hadn’t quite been able to articulate it, but this kind of gave me that “aha” of what I’d been thinking/feeling.
Like OP said, how could Buck get off the wheel when he keeps trying to “[fold] himself into the lives of other people and [make] himself into someone they want around.” But I really liked Tommy for exactly this reason! Because he had been portrayed as this independent, disconnected (that’s more speculation, since we know nothing about his relationships with Harbor or other friends - going off his desire to reconnect with the 118, wanting to be part of something, the group chat, bad relationship with at least his father, etc) guy who repeatedly showed up for Buck - and that seemed to indicate that he would not let Buck fold himself in. If anything, Tommy was the one inserting himself, which I saw partially because of logistics (him being a side character) but also as a defense mechanism. I didn’t think, based on their interactions and what little Tommy characterization we got, that he would let Buck fall into that pattern! Maybe he recognized in from himself or it was a defense mechanism, but I was excited that we’d see them have to grapple with this and maybe get to see Tommy open up. Even in the deleted scene with Hen and Karen, Tommy was reactive. Buck was the one setting the pace, he was the one Tommy was shaping himself for.
Even in Masks, I saw that as Tommy taking care of Buck because yes, that’s how he shows care/shows up for a partner, and also because reaching out for Buck’s heart meant he didn’t have to so quickly offer his own. He seemed to be falling in love. The timing of the “protect myself!” overcorrection made sense to me, but not how it was handled, and not Buck’s response.
Okay sorry. I guess I don’t have a point other than I am very unsatisfied and baffled by some decisions!
did buck ever tell tommy he doesn’t like basketball? was he just like, going along with it because that’s what tommy likes? going to movies when he doesn’t really watch many on purpose himself because tommy likes movies. was he runaway bride-ing tommy? was he “i’ve been thinking about what you said and i think you’re right. i do hide my true feelings from others”-ing tommy?
tommy breaking up with buck was certainly more about tommy’s issues, regardless of whatever he’s telling himself, than it was about buck. even if it contradicted what happened last season with the coffee date…people are complex and multifaceted and at this point i’m choosing to believe that tommy got very overwhelmed when buck used the words “engaged” and “married” and overcompensated in his backtrack
but maybe buck wasn’t honest with himself either. and buck wants off that hamster wheel but how can he when he doesn’t know how to keep from folding himself into the lives of other people and making himself into someone they want around (not stopping to to consider that maybe they would want him around anyway)
i’m personally unsatisfied with the ending of their relationship because tommy is gone now. i wanted to know why that was tommy’s reaction, what was going on in his head. i have the above theories but i’d like to know. we got that with abby (i would argue even before the train episode) and we got that with taylor but we won’t with tommy. i am also unsatisfied because i do not feel that masks reflected this dynamic. i was fully aware that we were losing tommy this season and masks got me to let my guard down for it happening so soon. this was their intention and i’m not sure why they would do that or what function it served
anyway, go back to therapy evan buckley
#sorry op#I didn’t think this was worth it’s own post so I tried to add substantive response#and not take the post over#bucktommy#I have a lot of other thoughts too !!!#also unlike op I am a filthy unrepentant bt as endgame desirer so I do have a bias#I tried to be objective tho#like even the lakers tickets which maybe were to show that Buck was lying or Tommy wasn’t paying attention???#bro got his man a 6 month anniversary gift! that’s so extra! that is spoiling-my-partner behavior#and based on 7x04 8x01 and 8x05 I refuse to believe Eddie did not roast Buck MERCILESSLY about the bball ankle situation#what was this episode doingggggggg
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imo if Phoenix and edgeworth started dating and didn’t announce it i don’t think anyone would realise 1. bc they’ve always Been Like That and 2. edgeworth is far too autistic to break the social norms he’s created and engage in ANY PDA around any mutual friends
#he has Work Mode and Not Work Mode and there’s no way he’d be able to do the cognitive shift#he would call phoenix ‘Wright’ during the work times#and the second he’s not Working he switches to Phoenix#phoenix calls him miles after a while#that is probably what tips people off that Something Has Changed#if it’s during phoenix’s living in the office era i’d say the only way they’d get Found Out#is if edgeworth was staying over#but i don’t think he would be caught DEAD in that office when not in Work Mode l#narumitsu#wrightworth#ace attorney
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Jesus Christ bro just received the most aggressive ask in my inbox confronting me about how I write Aventurine and demanding proof for why I interpret him the way I do 😭😭 I’m not good at making straight up analytical content but ig I’m gonna have to try to do it so I can support my own ideas because ig it’s not fair of me to say things about him without backing myself up. I wouldn’t mind if they hadn’t been so hostile like pls I like to think I’m pretty reasonable you don’t need to yell at me 😞
#[rawbin]#[aventurine]#Like it’s fine if you don’t like me and the way I write him but like. man.#please can you at least not be outright aggressive towards me ?#it’s kind of frustrating#like I do think I have decently thick skin when it comes to random hate comments (being a content creator since u were like 13 will do that-#- to you) but it’s still not fun to have people come up to me and insinuate they think I suck :/#Like yeah fair enough that you disagree with my takes I can see why but pls maybe don’t imply I’m a terrible person who doesn’t know what-#-abuse and toxicity is ?#sorry I feel like I’ve been very negative these last couple of posts#I’d probably be able to handle all this better if I wasn’t already in a pretty bad way 😭#I won’t even be able to put the analysis together tomorrow to make myself feel better about my own writing because I’ll be so busy#but whatever I’ll live and get over it I’ll be fine in like two weeks
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This looked hella fun. Here’s all my answers and I hope y’all jump on this!
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
♥ From what DR are you answering?
🦋My Dragon Rider’s Academy DR (something I made up and shifting to)
♥Your name in your DR? (and do you have any formal titles,ranks, positions,etc)
🦋My name there is Maple. No formal titles, but I will be getting the title “Queen” pretty soon over there due my s/o
♥What’s your favorite season?
🦋It’s a tie between summer where the academy is out and I have more free time, and winter because if Snowball (my bonded dragon) loving the snow
♥Who’s your s/o?
🦋My s/o is a lovely dragon man named Alexius (there is so much more to his name but we’ll just say Alexius for now) and he’s basically the king of the place/the place I’m attending the academy in this world. He’s not just called Alexius tho, I call him instead “Goldie” due to our first interaction and how he’s basically covered in gold via both jewelry and his scales.
♥Who is the first person you got to for advice?
🦋Lawrence. A upperclassman unicorn friend who is very knowledgeable and wise even tho we’re just a year apart in age.
♥Signature Scent?
🦋Idk my smell? I’ve been told by Alexius it’s something like flowers and snow?? No clue other than that
♥First person you got to if you’re upset and need comfort?
🦋I either go to another one of my friends (some I can’t say due to privacy reasons) or Alexius. It’s either one of those two choices tho it’s usually the first one. The one who usually comforts me is a really sweet girl, love her.
♥Longest friendship?
🦋That would be Chester, a human dude who I grew up with alongside a few others. He’s probably the one I’ve had the longest friendship with and is practically a brother to me. Awesome dude
♥Favorite thing about yourself?
🦋My audacity. I punched one of the vampire princes/nobles in the face. Hence it being my favorite (there’s a story here I won’t get in to)
♥Age and are you in school? Job? What role do you have etc.
🦋I am 24 and yes I’m in school called “Dragon Rider’s Academy” (there’s a fancier name but I don’t remember). This school is both a mixture of a magic school and kinda military academy I guess? So when I graduate I’ll become part of the forces called Dragon Riders. Our job is to obviously protect but also explore various uncharted places in this world. So I’ll be a soldier/explorer I guess at graduating. (Unless Alexius tries otherwise lol)
♥Favorite food/snack?
🦋Not really.
♥Best and Worst cook in your DR?
🦋That is a tie for best cook is between I’d say Lawrence and my roommate. Maybe Harriet as well? (Another friend of this DR) Worst cook is Alexius, it’s mostly a gut feeling but I don’t want that man in a kitchen. Love him with all my heart, he will not touch my stove.
♥What’s the setting? (Year, environment you’re in, are you in a city or countryside etc, modern or past or futuristic)
🦋It’s very much a fantasy setting. Can’t think of a way to describe it other than very high fantasy. Don’t know the year but I do live in a large city due to the academy I’m attending. Though there wasn’t much difference between where I had lived before and the academy. Just different rules and rulers I guess?
♥Unique thing about your appearance?
🦋Basically I’m a dhampir (half human/half vampire) and I think that makes my appearance pretty unique.
♥Siblings? Parents? Family in general? Who are they and what is their relation?
🦋No siblings but I do have a mom and a dad. Not really much to say about them other than my mom is the vampire parent in this equation lol
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🌻WOW THIS WAS HELLA FUN~!!
🌻Loved answering your questions and soft core loved being able to talk about my DR! Thanks for this~!💖
QUESTIONS ABOUT YOUR DR/DR SELF!!!
♥ HELLO ♥
~I'm bored and wanna interact with people for some shifting inspo so heres a shit ton of questions for everyone to answer about their DRs :)
PSA: Idk how this usually works if you reblog with answers or reply but feel free to do literally anything with it lol. You can ask each other or me specific questions idk I just wanna get the community active 🕺🏻
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♥ From what DR are you answering?
♥ Your name in your DR? (and do you have any formal titles, ranks, positions etc)
♥ What's your favorite season?
♥ Who's your s/o?
♥ Who is the first person you go to for advice?
♥ Signature scent?
♥ First person you go to if you're upset and need comfort?
♥ Longest friendship?
♥ Favorite thing about yourself?
♥ Age and are you in school? Job? What role do you have etc.
♥ Favorite food/snack?
♥ Best and worst cook in your DR?
♥ What's the setting? (Year, environment you're in, are you in a city or countryside etc, modern or past or futuristic)
♥ Unique thing about your appearance?
♥ Siblings? Parents? Family in general? Who are they and what's the relation?
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These are just very basic but I love questions!!! I'll definitely post more, and if there's a specific theme like friendship or s/o or whatever that anyone wants, lmk! :)
~Happy Shifting~
#reality shifting#shifting blog#desired reality#shifting#shifting community#shifting journey#shifting consciousness#permashifting#shifting antis dni#shiftblr#shifting realities#shifting motivation#shifting diary#dragon riders academy dr
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1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!
2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr
3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!
overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!
#aritalks#i did cry a little bit when i first woke up because i dont really know what to do about work and also i hate not having a car i can use#not only because of the work aspect but also getting my license when i was 18 gave me a freedom i didn’t have before#and i don’t like having to rely on other people just to like go to the fucking store or something yk#but then my best friend/roommate messaged me happy birthday and i was like fuck it! today is going to be a good day!#the stressful uncertainties can wait until tomorrow#also one of my best friends who hasn’t said happy birthday to me the past two years#(not intentionally im p sure they were just busy on my birthdays the past two years#and then had that moment of ‘oh shit i didnt send a message fuck i think its too late now’ which i totally get bc anxiety things yk)#was one of the first people to message me happy birthday!!#i’m also hoping to still be able to go see my mom and then stay the night at my dads tonight#so i can see both my parents and also my baby siblings for my birthday#my dads working today but after he texted happy birthday i sent him a text asking if he thinks we could still make it work#my mom is asleep still i think (she called me at midnight and left a voicemail singing happy birthday!! but her sleep schedule has been all#over the place recently so i’m waiting until 11:30 to call her which is in like 30 mins)#but she said something yesterday about driving out to me to give me a hug and also bring me my diabetes stuff that got delivered#(her house is my mailing address because i know it’s not going to change bc it’s my great grandparents house that she’s partially inhereting#when my great grandpa dies but since i have moved out of my dads my address has changed twice and i didnt have a mailbox at my last place so#just for the sake of consistency and not having to worry about important shit getting sent to the wrong address i’ve had her house as my#mailing address since i moved out of my dads at 19)#so i think i’m gonna ask her if she can just pick me up instead so i can go to her house w her and hang out with her#and hopefully my dad will be able to at least stop by with my siblings so i can see them too#i’d like to stay the night with them but if we can’t make it happen then i can also stay the night w my mom and hopefully tomorrow figure#out the car situation. might have to rent a car for a week if i can afford it? best case scenario is my moms car can be fixed but i still#dont know whats wrong with it ik there are two potential problems and one is fixable the other is not#the fixable one would cost like $150-$400 to fix depending on if we get a used part or a new one#if its $150-$200 ish i can probably afford to pay for the whole thing or at least most of it#but if its more than that hopefully my dad or one of my family members can help#and i can just pay them back in like $50 increments with my next few paychecks#just realized i said i wouldnt worry abt the car thing today and also i think im at tag limit to i’ll stop now lmao xoxo gossip girl ❤️
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bisexuality update! today i was getting ice cream and a guy walked in. extremely short, and looked like the type of guy who regularly yells at another guy on the streets of hoboken outside of the local deli about the yankees. and i thought you know what actually i might want to fuck him. !!!!!!!
#this is fucking progress i think yeah????? like the first real life man ive ever encountered who i can recognize im attracted to! woo hoo!#if i’d have matched w him on a dating app i absolutely would have met up with him at a dunkin or smth! i cannot see myself romantically with#him or men in general and i don’t think that will ever change but like dude i want to take that man’s virginity with a neon pink strap and b#e his big spoon when it’s over while we watch cake boss or some shit on the tv. i sneak out as he’s drifting off and he doesn’t see me again#until we’re fucking again; maybe he’s in charge this time at least at first but once i get my mouth on him he gets all babygirl-ified and i#lay him down and take care of him….#this is hilarious and i’m high key very happy for myself bc like dude i know i have so much internalized biphobia so being able to recognize#that i’m attracted to him????? fuck yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!#i want to take this man’s virginity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The Incredible Hulk (1968) #252
#I’m really enjoying the conflict here#that the Hulk came to help his friends but they think his presence is just making things worse and they can handle it on their own#which does seem to hurt the Hulk’s feelings because they don’t appreciate what he’s just gone through to try to help them#and then that the Hulk’s upset that his friends would tell him not to hurt people that are actively hurting him#and therefore that his friends are prioritizing other people over him#it’s not that his friends never get concerned about the Hulk getting hurt but I’d say it’s exceedingly rare#because the Hulk’s proved that he’s able to survive everything he’s already experienced#so over time the fear that someone will succeed in killing him gets diminished#and pain is temporary and so isn’t as much of a big deal#I think it’s interesting to have the Hulk pick up on that while his friends are concerned about him#that doesn’t really exceed their concern for the people around him#and who’s is more deserving of sympathy- the Hulk or the person he’s fighting#isn’t always a simple question with a simple answer#marvel#bruce banner#betty ross#rick jones#fred sloan#thunderbolt ross#my posts#comic panels
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//Something I relate to with Samurai Jack, is that feeling of life finding every opportunity to push you back down, to kick your legs out from under you, bring you to your knees, leave you screaming, in pain, desperate, on fire. And yet to persevere, not just for your sake, but because you don’t see any other way. And somehow, even limping, you’ll find a way to wring out peace, happiness, contentment, love, and passion from this never ending path of pain. If you are to suffer, but there is no other way, there must be joy to be gripped with white knuckles and hungry claws, to fight for peace and to strive for hope even in the midst of all your anger and confusion and despair.
I may feel like there’s no way out, but I’ve got to keep moving. There are people out there depending on me to not give up. I can’t let these forces trying to cut my journey to an abrupt end win— even if I’m tired, even if I feel like it’s too much. When I feel alone, I let my mind picture what they’d want, I let myself mourn and wonder and wish, but I don’t let it give up. I can’t go see you yet. I have more to do. Watch me and I will see you when my work is done. But I will hold onto you for all of my life. I will make my life a service to you, my actions a memorial that can be trailed to you. In every move I make I will tell the ones I love, gone and with me, “this is for you, this is for you,” and when I live, even with tears and anger and joy, “this is for you.”
#『名誉: musings』#『 out of robes 』#『 meta 』#『 sharkie chews the scenery 』#//and maybe someday once the oppressive darkness doesn’t feel so close I can say ‘this is for me too’.#//hi guys I bet you weren’t surprised when I didn’t actually start rping again after trying to come back#//that’s because I posted that promo got zero response and felt discouraged#//and then life threw every awful thing it had at me.#//I feel like haven’t been able to do anything but fight to survive lately. been in a bad place#//and right as new year’s started I lost a very very beloved friend and pet unexpectedly and too soon#//I’ve lost a lot of loved ones these past few years. it builds up. I think this last loss was the most unexpected though.#//since then I’ve been in a worse state mentally that I probably have been since high school#//but I refuse to give up hope because that’s what helped me climb out of my last endless pit#//I’ve been really wanting to write Jack again since I posted the promo but haven’t really had much I could do#//plus I’ve been battling all this irl stuff and it’s made it hard to find much left over for hobbies#//but I’m posting this both as a love letter for jack and for those here I care about#//and to say I’m still here. I won’t abandon Jack I don’t think. he means too much to me#//I’m thinking if I start rping him again I’m going to worry less about cosmetics and worry more about getting something written#//I’ve been worried about trying to be presented in a nice aesthetic fashion but tbh I think that’s blocking me from actually doing things#//I’d like to do a soft restart and maybe focus more on the people I know have talked to me and talk to them#//hopefully you will have me back after to much time away and waffling to get started again. I had decent reasons but still#//being away does a lot to severe decent connections#//anyway. Jack means Hope and Healing to me. no matter how much he goes through it isn’t about the pain.#//it’s about the Herculean yet incredibly human task of overcoming constant and monumental odds because you care.#//because at your core is hope and passion and love.#//I‘ve been crying writing this so it’s probably very sappy and unpolished but I’m not sorry lol#//listening to my old playlists I used to play on loop whenever writing Jack or thinking about him and it made me emotional
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Guess who fucked up her knee again??? And AT WORK no less
#oh god i hate this. everything about this. like i am crying and screaming and throwing up#GOD girl. honestly i think the worst part was it was almost the end of my shift. it was ~4:05 and i was sipping my water as i do#and i was about to go back to the counter and get back at it and serve the customers that were there. but i must have.. slipped? or twisted#something wrong??? i don’t know. all i know is my knee popped straight out of its socket and i SCREAMED and fell to the fucking ground#my coworker (we’ll call the sheriff) tried to grab me and failed. i just sat there with my head in my hands thinking PLEASE tell me this#didn’t fucking happen. it did though. VERY publicly#i don’t know who summoned them but the retail manager and my ultimate boss wheeled me out 🫠 and the marketing guy drove me to the hospital 🫠#which didn’t have an x-ray because shitty small town hospital 🫠🫠🫠 but we managed to rendezous with my stepdad there#at which point i was handed over to him. at which point i decided ‘fuck the hospital’ because literally they did NOTHING the first time i#dislocated my knee. they didn’t even x-ray it or prescribe me anything!!!! they just hurt me more; told me i’d overextended a ligament#and sent me home to convalesce. so i was like.. i mean i don’t feel like doing that again#i can tell my kneecap is back in the socket because girl i made it upstairs. like. yes it hurts like hell but i don’t think anything#is broken. i DO need to find out why this shit keeps happening to me and what i can do to stop it; but that’s not an a&e situation#that’s a gp or a physio or a fucking knee expert or something#so basically i’m going to stay in my bed with my brace and an ice pack and some entertainment and see what happens to me#i already know this is bad. like. as bad as the first time probably#the second and third times i was able to walk unassisted afterwards. i can’t walk unassisted. so.#basically tomorrow i’m going to call my boss and be like ‘i don’t think i can come in for the rest of the week on account of my knee#is approximately the size of texas and i have officially sprained it badly. but i’ll update you’#i hope i’m wrong. i hope i wake up tomorrow to just like a mild ache and feel STUPID#girl i can’t believe i’m saying this but i want to go to work. i want to work bank holiday sunday PLEEEEEAAAAAASE#i don’t want to limp around my house and cry. recuperating from an injury is the fucking worst WHY must i do it again#so. if you need me i’m going to be eating whatever the hell my mom has prepared (worst part of this is i can’t even cook for myself)#and reading… something. or i might play stardew honestly. or write!! i’ve been wanting to write for so long my god#so that’s my life currently 🙃🙃🙃#personal
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