#i do want to say about this comic that it is like. extremely 100% platonic. it does not get further away from romance than

[rhenuvee]

Playing Animal Crossing New Horizons with HSR Men

Warnings: ugly villager slander, established relationship (can be platonic or romantic)

──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

Argenti: Your fellow knight of beauty grows quite fond of the game, immediately finding the freedom of creativity in decoration endearing. He always gives you compliments on your OOTD, and takes screenshots whenever you design a new area on your island. Argenti gave himself the gardening job- spending his bells on red rose seeds. He gets proficient in following the flower guide, and is very proud of himself if he ever gets a golden rose on your island. He loves the villagers, finding them each very cute, and even beauty in the "ugly" villagers. "Did you see the villagers wearing the red rose on their head? I must say I am flattered they love it so much. Though, I am more happy that they appreciate the beauty of our island." He enjoys documenting the beautiful places in your island with photos <3

Aventurine: From the beginning he points out the fact that Tom Nook is a capitalist, which makes you roll your eyes thinking he thinks this game is silly. However, it is quite the opposite as it doesn't take him long to get out of his home loan debt and is somehow extremely lucky. It's unfair to you that he could just log in on any given day and have the best deal for turnips. However because you are his favourite he says he’s willing to buy you whatever you want, he guesses. He happens to be able to catch rare species like the Coelacanth, and it infuriates you but you really can't be if it's helping the museum. "445 bells per turnip, sounds like music to my ears~" "What's that? You want this violin? Well I guess I could spare you a few bells... is one million okay?"

Blade: Let's not kid ourselves here- it takes a lot of convincing and help from Silver Wolf to get him to even be in the presence of Animal Crossing. He says he would much rather stand and look at the wall (SW: "You already do that everyday"). Eventually he sits himself next to you, and listens to your giddy rambling about what to do in the game while he puts on a serious face not saying anything. After the preliminary tutorial/startup gameplay, he finally says, “…why is this rat harassing me for money.” However, the loans aren't the worst but the villagers chasing him down are. He purposely ignores them and grumbles when you tell him to answer ):/. He prefers to watch you play, but because he sees you smile and laugh at his sarcastic comments, he thinks it's not so bad.

Boothill: He's definitely down to try it out, but he ends up being a bit of a troll. He doesn't really mind cute/ugly villagers, until he judges them for what they say. “That’s right, (y/n) did catch all those fish.” “Did he just ask me if he could call me Muffin.” “WHAT DO YOU MEAN I GOTTA PAY ANOTHER LOAN?!!?” Yeah… he quickly feels the grindy-ness, complaining that Tom Nook was working him like a forkin’ dog. A little bit of comical rage, but he won’t lie he is enjoying it. He also asks if there are any guns and he is disappointed, so he opts for the net. He's a little rough and rowdy, but he does it in style. That being said, he 100% spends his extra bells on a cowboy outfit.

Dan Heng: He agrees instantly- aw :(. He knows you (and March) have been begging him to play. He’s is fairly good at it- gets out of the tent quickly, masters catching creatures, a nicely organized house… He’s quite resourceful too, chopping down trees and going to mystery islands to farm the heck out of it. The villagers love him, both of you often seeing them run to him with the little sparkly flowers. And even though he's normally serious, you can't help but fawn over how sweet he is with the villagers. "...She wants to call me Shmoopy, do I-" "YES." Villagers asking him to catch a fish? He's immediately on it. He remembers their names and treats them like real people :(

Dr. Ratio: "Is it educational?" Bro is such a nerd. You deadpan at him, and sass him for expecting this to be IXL or something. He is also one to get through the tutorial part easily. You expected him to be overly critical of the game, but he finds appreciation in the museum: both the creatures and the art. Is it a farfetched idea that I think he'd know how to tell the reals and fakes right off the bat? "Do you really think Da Vinci spilled coffee on his work?" At least it saves you the troubles of wasting your bells and getting a fake. I think your island would not be a mess, and would have at least a few statues (you know the ones) which add his touch to it.

Gallagher: Honestly he's happy as long as he gets a little area for himself. Kind of a wild card this one- somehow calm and chaotic at the same time, and it's puzzling because how is he doing such weird things with a straight face? Trolls the villagers quite a bit (he's lucky ACNH villagers are nice) by hitting them with a net (just once though) and giving them different catchphrases every time they ask. "Why is Bob saying 'spaghettini' at the end of his sentences?" "Um, because I thought it'd be funny? Also I'm kinda hungry so-" "Gallagher ):/" Despite the randomness, he is wholesome at times. He is also one to compliment your new outfit, and stargaze with you on the new area you decorated.

Gepard: He's busy so you weren't expecting too much from him, but he takes pride in having a well-rounded island. He gets so excited when he catches a new species that you don't have yet- what a cutie. Also goes full throttle when there's a bug-off or fishing tourney. Despite being a video game, I feel like there will be some way he messes up taking care of plants. The flowers overgrow, the turnips rot, and he doesn't understand why the trees aren't growing? But with some tips from you along with your island designing skills, your island rank moves up and he is BEAMING. "Zucker asked about you." "...he did?" "Mhm, he asked how you were doing, and said he saw you laying out pathways on the island."

Jing Yuan: He finds it so cute when you ask him to play. Lowkey like Blade where he likes watching your happy expressions when playing. He's happy that this game provides him a way to relax while not getting bored. Secretly an enjoyer of villager drama: "Wolfgang wants to apologize to Audie with this present. What happens if I don't deliver it?" "Again? Ah, just give it to her quickly." "...what if I don't." "...Jing Yuan." Oddly I feel like he'd enjoy the group stretching (what an old man), and encourages you to join. Like the "Dozing General" he is, there will be times when he's inactive and gets the bed head.

Luocha: You weren't expecting him to enjoy the game, but he's surprisingly willing to be resourceful. His storage is full of materials, which you scold him for because this is the reason for his empty undecorated house. But he always has things you need so you can't exactly complain. Also one to be pretty smart with managing bells and resources, able to maximize their worth. When the island gets visitors like Label or Flick, he has items ready. "Luocha... where did you get that coat?" "This? It's a designer piece, from Miss Label." I'd say he does have a sense of beauty in design, so thankfully your island is gorgeous.

Sampo: Sympathizes with Redd like a true scammer. "Aw look, he just needs a bit of money to get started... he even gave us a 'cousin's discount'." However, a rivalry starts with Redd when Sampo's first art piece turned out to be fake (scammer gets scammed moment). He asks if he can be the salesman that he's supposed to be. When villagers run up to him to offer bells for an item he has, he accepts thinking it'll get him a deal along the way. Unfortunately friendship gets you nowhere in terms of home loans. I'd say he's pretty good with the turnip stonks, so there's a balance. Also TRASH ISLAND. I'm sorry, but your man is a hoarder, "But what if I need this?" (Literally me.)

Welt: When you ask him to play he asks why the animals are crossing. He finds the style and characters are so cute, and he can see why you enjoy it. This is definitely a way he gets in touch with his "youthful" side. He loves the creative freedom in the game, even getting indecisive about how to design your island, and thinking of what outfit to wear. He once made a simple t-shirt for fun, but was surprised when he saw a villager wearing it. It'd be so cute and funny when he learns new emotes- and he just spams them with a straight face. Not gameplay related, but I feel like in his free time he'd draw you both in villager form <3.

──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

[shnebrght]

Unlikely KHR Pairings Worth Exploring*

Hi it's Red again, with another small bit.

To get my muse running a little I've decided to share a bit of my opinions and analysis on some of the unlikely, but worth pairings throughout KHR. Please note that this is my opinion, and if somehow this ends up manifesting, then ohmygod I'll be extra excited to see it.

Basically if you want to read a little bit of weird ship/pair dynamics in a fictional universe, then this is my take and I hope you enjoy yourself.

First we need to look at what encompasses a successful pairing worth exploring (in my words).

The way I see it, a good pairing between two characters happens when their personalities compliment each other, when their ideals match and they work together towards them, when their skills augment each other (this is a BATTLE SHOUNEN), and most simply, when their respective canons displayed them to have good chemistry. That is to say, not all canon pairings are good pairings -- because a dysfunctional pairing can also ensue in canon, if underdeveloped and not justified well enough. An example of a bad pairing, is Reborn and Bianchi. The comical aspect of their relationship is apparent, with Bianchi being in her 20s and Reborn being a baby, but. It also plays into Bianchi's character, so we need to take it seriously... Regardless of the fact Reborn is an Arcobaleno.

An example of a good pairing in my opinion would be Ken and Chikusa. Simple enough, even if not romantic, Ken is close-range and Chikusa is long-range. They're both devoted to Mukuro greatly, and their personalities - while uncomplimentary of each other, can have good dynamics for back and forths. I do however feel like this pairing takes better stage in action, more than anywhere else, by virtue of what these characters showed us.

Okay? We got a rough idea? Cool. Let's give 3 of them.

Basil and Haru - Discount Tsuna and Gremlin Kyoko. While I ship Haru with Gokudera, this pairing is 100% platonic/romantic. I feel like this pairing would work really well by virtue of their personalities more than literally anything else. Basil is lax and polite, but serious when it counts. Haru, being more on the chaotic side, would throw a wrench into Basil's composure and force him to react, which I feel is a very potentially funny dynamic to explore. Basil is also very dedicated and kind-hearted, and that kind-heartedness (that was shown in Tsuna too), would probably sway Haru to his good side. If these two end up together, they'd be in for a good life.

There's also the "rejected by Tsuna" dynamic to take into account.

Gamma and Lancia - Remember that bit above that I said close-range and long-range? This applies here too. Power/Platonic/Romantic. While opposites attract, this is a case of complete likeliness. Gamma and Lancia are both extremely devoted to their bosses. Gamma doesn't like fighting kids, and Lancia is flat out great with them. I feel like these two have a lot to talk about, aside from their devotions. Their general vibe, I feel, also meshes well greatly. Granted, Gamma is a little more loose and Lancia is a bit more rigid, but if they were entirely alike, this wouldn't work, right?

Xanxus and Byakuran - This pairing is why I'm writing this post in the first place. Skewed Romantic/Power. This is easily a hate-pairing, from Xanxus' side. But if Byakuran works his magic and manages to persuade Xanxus to move sides, the potential is terrifying. Their personalities directly contrast each other, but in a very complimentary way: Byakuran's laid-back and all-knowing nature can really rile up Xanxus' rage and drive, while Xanxus' constant action requires Byakuran to constantly be on check. If these two end up a pairing, no one is safe; even themselves.

Yeah that's all for now, thanks for reading!

[mokutone]

page 1 (you are here) | page 2 | page 3 | page 4 | page 5 | page 6 | page 7 | page 8 | page 9 | page 10 | page 11 | page 12 This is one of the earliest multi-page comic ideas I had, I drew out the sketches for this comic over a year and a half ago. It took a while to actually get around to making this, but at the same time in some ways, it's been very easy to make this comic, even if my understanding of these characters has changed and grown with time. I was considering posting this comic all at once, but tumblr woudln't let me put all pages on one post, and I fear that the authorial image descriptions would become hard or cumbersome to read all in one post. Maybe one day I'll compile it into a proper little pdf.

image desc below readmore

ID: A traditionally inked, digitally colored comic. Panel one is solid darkness which extends across the top of the comic from end to end. "Please don't react badly," says a crumbling, square speech balloon from Tenzō. Immediately overlapping it is a wavering speech balloon from Kakashi, which leads into the second panel. The second panel is also darkness, but it is smaller, contained, does not spread the width of the page. "—Tenzō!? What are you doing in my apartment? Weren't you on a mission with another cell?" In the third panel, colored in dark reds, oranges, and yellows, we see Tenzō curled defensively around himself, wearing his Anbu gear, clutching a bandaged arm. His speech balloons follow the general curve of his body, as though he's trying to make a second defense of his words. Tenzō says: "This is bad. I know. I'm asking something terrible. But I don't...I can't..." In the fourth panel, we have a low view, looking up at a backlit Kakashi, warm yellow light pouring in around him, his body in shadow. He's standing stiffly. "Can't what? Tenzō, what's wrong?" He asks. The fifth panel is silent. Close on Tenzō's blank Anbu mask where he sits huddled. The sixth panel, Tenzō turns, mask and all, away, hunching even further in on himself, raising his shoulders around his mask. "I'm sorry," he says. /end ID

[blanketorghost]

Friendly reminder that just because OMORI doesn't have a confirmed lgbt character or sunflower isn't canon doesn't mean the game is queerbaity.

A key aspect of queerbaiting is actively using the possibility of lgbt characters to lure in lgbt folks. OMORI never advertised nor implied the appearance of lgbt characters nor any romance (aside from Aubrey's crush). Hell, before the official release Basil could've been an alter ego, imaginary friend, Sunny's sibling or even dead since the demo barely gave us any info about the two's relationship other than 'best friends'

OMOCAT also having an lgbt comic isn't conclussive evidence, just because she made a comic abt these issues once doesn't mean all her media has to be lgbt related, and expecting them to be is the mistake of the consumer, not OMOCAT's

As a queer person, it is frustrating seeing how the prescence of one queer coded character in a piece of media is immediately made into 'queerbaiting'. If you want to look at actual queerbaiting, look at voltron or disney, which have tried countless times to promote famous ships and gay characters to get people to watch their series without doing the effort of actually going thru it. Basil, as gay coded as he is inside the game, was never advertised to be queer nor his relationship with Sunny to be romantic prior to the game's release. And no, them being drawn beside one another, holding hands or talking aren't queerbaits (especially the holding hands thing, they are kids? Kids hold hands when they're best friends? This doesn't imply romantic interest)

Look, I'm not trying to discredit peeps' queer readings and interpretations of the game, I myself have my own queer headcanons for the main characters and ship sunflower, but honestly this whole 'queerbait' debate feels extremely un-nuanced coming from someone who had been following the game's development since 2014.

It is also really weird how Sunny and Basil's relationship is forced to be romantic by the fandom as an argument of queerbaiting. Look, I get it, they are really close and their friendship is one of the most important parts of the game, and you can definitely headcanon them to have feelings for each other (as I do) it is 100% valid. BUT two boys having a strong friendship isn't enough grounds for queerbait nor the idea should be forced onto people that it is? As gay as Basil is, he should be allowed to have a close male best friend. If you can see the chemistry in them, good! and you don't need to see it nor interpret it as that either it's also good. I, an ace biromantic person, hc it as romantic, as do some other queer friends, and some other queer friends hc them ad being 100% platonic while still acknowledging Basil's gay coding.

Sure, OMOCAT has made doodles of Sunny and Basil in a romantic context, but she has also done so for Kel x Sunny (both male and female versions), Sunny x Aubrey and Aubrey x Kim, that doesn't make them automatically canon but a creator having fun with her characters, as well as allowing others to do the same, saying this doodles confirm queerbait is very ???? I like to draw non-canon ships of my characters sometimes, does that make me queerbaity?

This honestly makes me so sad as both an lgbt person and as an artist that this shit happened, this over-scrutinizing and misuse of labelling queerbait content is just going to make it a buzzword when there are many more shows that actually are guilty of this which should be rightfully called out.

[moons-and-stars-and-shit]

OKAY SO-

can i get a platonic matchup pleaSeEeE?

okay, so- lets talk about myself sdsnfnenxnf

My name is Jei, I use she/they pronouns, I am 5’11” and I ABSOLUTELY AM THE AWKWARD TALL KIND OF PERSON (I wish I wasn’t tho-). I have short curly hair, (RANDOM THOUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS, DO YOU EVEN NEED TO KNOW HOW I LOOK FOR A P L A T O N I C MATCHUP? weeeeelll i am already here so, lets just keep going ig) I am like b i g IDK BAHSHAHSHABS

As you can see I am a bit uH chaotic (it is a daily thing but iDK TODAY I AM JUST OVER THE TOP) I am an ambivert, I am an INFP, Aries sun, Cancer moon and Sagittarius rising sbdsndns

I uHhhHh- I am very awkward in first meetings but if we have something in common I’ll ramble about our common interest which almost always leads to me talking about other stuff.

I am a Marvel fan if that’s uUuuh- important? I LOVE UM GOOD OMENS BAHSHAHZHA, i dOnt even know what i am talking about anymore but lets keep going BABDBAHZHA

I have a B I G variety of music taste, from 40s big band songs to uhhhHh lets just say ppcocaine(???

I get distracted w a y too easily, I tend to get lost on time

I LOVE TO DRAW AND TO WRITE (but i never have time to finish so me is very m a d >:))

My best subject is english, english teachers always love me for some effing reason :D

My favorite colors are orange, green, coffee? (COFFEE IS A COLOR? I FORGOT OMFG) OH SHOOT WAIT I HAD TO SEARCH IT UP, IT IS CALLED BROWN BAHAAHHAHAHA I AM SO STUPID, beigeEs and blaCk >:)

yeah, i like dark academia buT in a like chaotic rebel way if it is possible???????

AM I MAKING ANY SENSE NOW???? i am sleep deprived so i don’t really knoW

I tend to see the good in people (yes that includes bad people too, sadly), I have troubles speaking for myself in situations where people are troubling me,,,

What elseeee????

I am lazy sometimes, I’ll admit it 😌☝🏽 and it gets on my nerves:D (i am working on it tho)

All my time is sucked by school, I am an overachiever and adbanxnajxjs i cry cuz school u know? <3

And I think that’s it?????

THANK YOUUU, HAVE A NICE DAY/NIGHT

@burntbayleaf IM SORRY BUT WE NEED TO BE FRIENDS

Also yes my Aries sister 😩

Platonic Matchup

Nishinoya Yuu

How Y’all Met

Aight

So you rolled up into school with a FIRE marvel t-shirt

And nishinoya being a marvel fan himself took IMMEDIATE notice

So what did he do

Approach you of course 🙄✋

However...

It was quite awkward at first 🥲

He really just went up to you and was like

“Oh you like marvel? What’s your favorite movie, or do you prefer the comics?, OH Have how ever seen...”

And he just went on and on and on

But when he realized he was rambling he apologized and asked you the first question again

Now it was your turn to ramble on and on about your interests

But honestly noya just rolled with it

Rooooooollliiiinnnng Thunnndaaaa

After you both were done with your rambling

He invited you over to his house for a #MarvelMarathon

And who tf were you to say no

So you pulled up to his house and started the marathon

In the middle of said marathons noya’s phone started to ring

And what was his ringtone?

Ppcocains PJ

And what did you do when you heard this?

Sang along ofc

And noya was just in shock

But after overcoming his shock he started singing with you

Yeah...he missed that call

But who gives af! Y’all are having a concert rn!

The day bled into night and he offered for you to stay the night

Not wanting to walk home in the dark you agreed

And oml the night was just filled with movies, mini concerts, and junk food 👀

Ever since that night you and him have been attached at the hip

What You Have In Common

Well obviously you both like Marvel

And ppcocain

But you both have a chaotic energy that mashes well with each other

You both have small attention spans/ get distracted very easily 😀

Istg conversations with you two are all over the place

One minute it’s this subject then two seconds later it’s a different subject

Fun fact: you made him watch good omens with you and now he’s obsessed

He says he has a deep emotional connection with Crowley ❤️

Favorite Things To Do Together

Good lord

Honestly if he could just recreate your first sleepover

Life would be perfect

Because THATS his favorite thing to do with you

Just bonding over common interests

Whether that be with music, movies, hobbies

Whatever

No matter what you two do it’s always a party

OTHER THAN BEING CRAZY THO

He actually really likes to have drawing competitions with you

Even though he always loses 🥲

You’ve offered to not make it a competition

But he says that’s what make it fun :)

Random Hc

Oh your his personal tutor

100%

He needs help with school

Screw the teachers

Screw the tutors

There is only ✨you✨

He has also volunteered you as a tutor for the team :D

without your knowledge....

You two have weekly movie nights

But lately he’s just been binging good omens with you

Speaking of Good Omens 👀

That is YOUR show

Like if one of you even watch ONE episode without the other

All hell breaks lose

Ok off topic Hc but people think your the equivalent of asahi 🥲

Astrology

Independent Aries and collaborative Libra form a funny sort of friendship.

Aries tries convincing Libra to take chances, shake off criticism, and be more direct.

Libra constantly tells Aries to slow down, smell the flowers, and be more appreciative.

It's an odd couple type of relationship that can work extremely well.

Aries can learn the fine art of diplomacy from Libra, while Libra may become more assertive thanks to Aries.

While the Aries and the Libra are opposing each other from an astrological point of view, they can still become friends very fast.

The Aries admires how the Libra is graceful, stylish and funny, while the other way around, the latter truly likes how determined to take part in new adventures and always courageous their friend is.

Of course, the friendship between these two will sometimes be challenging because the Aries can get hurt seeing the Libra is flighty, while the latter may not like the way the former is pushy.

However, these two can easily make up and neither of them likes to hold a grudge.

Aesthetic

Chaotic ⚡️👹💥

Songs-

PJ - Ppcocain

Tokyo Drift - Teriyaki Boyz

Won’t Bite - Doja cat

My Axe - Insane Clown Posse

[gladiatortale]

My DEPRESSION BEATING, fandom obsessing, shit-tastic FANTASTIC year in review!

TL;DR: I’m fixing my mental health and figuring out WHO THE FUCK I AM one fandom filled day at a time! Thank you to everyone who’s been there for me along the way. xoxo

what’s up HEATHENS.

stating the goddamn obvious here, it’s been a HELLUVA YEAR. One emotional rollercoaster after another but we’re ALMOST DONE. I know things aren’t gonna magically get better the second it flips to 00:01 on January first, but I’m excited to put this year behind me, and (SHOCKINGLY) a bit sad to see it go.

It was a year where the whole world completely stopped, we realized what is really important, what is really worth fighting for, and took a GODDAMN SECOND to just breathe.

For me personally, the year (which I’m counting off from November 1st) started out UNBELIEVABLY SHIT. I had just been kicked out of the country I called home for the last four years (thank you Brexit), I had ZERO job prospects, my depression was the WORST it had ever been, and I just didn’t want to get out of bed in the morning. And in the beginning, the pandemic felt like salt in the wound, an extra kick in the teeth to my early twenties that had already “failed to launch.”

But I tried to embrace the madness, really take advantage of the world (that I always thought moved to fast) properly slowing down, and take time to try and become myself again. I wanted to figure out what I loved and try and become a bit more like the person I was before my depression got so bad.

I often say I became that Manic Trash Planet Lady™ you see in sci-fi adventure films; a bit zany to say the least, with a million ideas and a very eclectic fashion sense, but embracing the insanity as it comes...

*cough cough* audrey, get to the goddamn point!

Right. lol. THE POINT IS! 

I’m not 100% “healed”, I’m not sure if I think depression is a “oh look you’re officially cured! hooray!” type of disease, but this year I let myself ENJOY SHIT for the first time in god knows how long. I still don’t know “wHaT i WaNt To dO WiTh mY LiFe”, but I’ve got a better idea and I’m heading in (what feels like) the right direction. And most of all, I can look back and say I am better than where I was a year ago.

So I wanted to say T H A N K Y O U to the mad lads on this website that introduced me to the fandoms, shows, movies, fics... THE SHIT that made me happy this year and were there to be one (BIG) piece in my healing journey.

AND SO, with out further rambling ADO! Here are the highlights of the year marked by my ridiculous hyper-fixations and OBSESSIONS. Thanks for putting up with me ya fiends, xoxox

November 2019  The Arcana (Visual Novel)

I had just gotten home and I was in a LOOOOOOW place. Randomly decided to download this app when it came up and it proceeded to ruin my life (and my bank account...) for pretty much the rest of the year. It was exactly what I needed to get me through a tough time and I was thoroughly, horse-blinders-up-to-the-rest-of-the-world, OBSESSED. These gorgeous magical fiends ruined me and all I could say was thank you.

Joined the fandom: November 2019 Obsession peaked: Late November Obsession faded: December 2019; I started a new job AND my bank statement came in and I realized I had accidentally spent over SIXTY BUCKS on this stupid app. No ragrets, but I definitely started to phase out at that point. Fandom friends: Velma, (@lanavxds on insta) miss you girlie xx Fanfics you NEED to read: ‘Second Mistake’ by DeathBelle on AO3, because DAAAAAYUM SON. Favourite moments: Basically the whole of the Julian arc. That gangly himbo OWNED my ass for a month.

December 2019 Hazbin Hotel (TV Series)

Y’ALL okay here me out. Am I proud of this one? No. Is the show crass as hell? OOOOOOOOHHHH YEAH. Did my angsty ass love it at the end of last year? DAMN STRAIGHT IT DID. Goes without saying, but this is NOT FOR EVERYBODY, but it definitely helped me along the way to becoming more comfortable with myself and being open about being the massive geek that I always was, and watching things I enjoy regardless of what people say about it.

Joined the fandom: December 2019 Obsession peaked: Shortly there after. Fandom friends: None. Dipped one toe in fandom discourse and then promptly YEETED the fuck outta there. Obsession faded: January 2019. Still curious to see the full series if A24 actually ever does produce the whole thing, but I have def moved away from it. Fanfics you NEED to read: Haven’t read any. Maybe I’m a pussy baby piece-o-shit, but I DID NOT want to go down that rabbit hole, NO MA’AM. Favourite moments:

Discovering the Hunicast podcast. These guys are a riot and Ashley is a flustered GEM. Even if you don’t watch the show, go watch an episode of these fucking LADS just dicking about and your day will get better.

Watching the first episode with my partner and watching him realize his girlfriend is a total freak.

January 2020 Lore Olympus (Webtoon Comic)

*Officially* discovered this one thanksgiving weekend in 2019, but my Arcana phase was still raging pretty strong at that point so I didn’t really get in to it until later. EVERYBODY AND THEIR MOTHER NEEDS TO READ IT. It has everything and handles the reality sexual assault and it’s aftermath EXTREMELY well.

Joined the fandom: Late November 2019 Obsession peaked: January 2020 Fandom friends: KELLEY. MA GIRL XOXOXO Obsession faded: June-ish 2020. I’m like 10 chapters behind now, but I still love this story so much. Fanfics you NEED to read: SO MANY ON MY ‘MARKED FOR LATER’ LIST AAAAAH. I have to get to that... NEW YEARS RESOLUTION lol Favourite moments: Having a drunk conversation on New Years Eve in 2019 with one of my oldest friends from high school about how much she loved it too. Helped me see how popular fandom and fandoms, are especially after feeling like I needed to hide my enthusiasm through high school and uni. (THAT WAS A MISTAKE BUT I’LL GET THERE IN A MINUTE).

February 2020 Versailles (TV Series)

SO FUCKING GAY Y’ALL. Oh my god everyone in this show is so gay. Even when they’re not they still are a little bit. AND BEST OF ALL!! it’s very historically accurate (except for the demon satanic nonsense in season 3, what was that???)

Joined the fandom: February 2020 Obsession peaked: Like??? The SECOND I finished episode one. Fandom friends: none... WHERE ARE ALL OF YOU??? Obsession faded: March 2020. It was a fast and passionate love affair, what can I say? Fanfics you NEED to read: IF YOU HAVE RECS, GIVE ‘EM TO MEEEEE. Favourite moments: 

Showing the first episode to a friend of mine and the *ungodly GASP* that came out of her throat was... PRICELESS.

The ENTIRE throuple(???) relationship between the Chevalier, Philipe, and Palatine. PLATONIC/ ROMANTIC LOVE G O A L S.

March 2020 Yuri!!! On Ice (TV Series)

*deep breath* ...y’all knew this one was coming.

Was I ready for this show to ruin my fucking life? No.  Am I so glad it happened??? FUCK YEAH.

NEVER IN MY LIFE have I fallen off the deep end so quickly with a fandom. HOLY SHIT. This blog didn’t have much of an “identity” before, but I you said that this is a Yuri On Ice blog now I wouldn’t even be mad (nor could I really defend myself to the contrary... bc??? like??? just go LOOK at my archive). Craziest thing is I watched the first two episodes like?? a solid TWO YEARS ago, but I didn’t continue watching because I was just not in the right head space for all the love and silliness and positivity.

I could do a whole separate post about how much this show and how this fandom has changed my life (DON’T TEMPT ME I JUST MIGHT). But I’ll stick with the highlights for now ;)

Joined the fandom: March 2020  Obsession peaked: Has it peaked?? Went straight up and it still going lol Fandom friends: Sandra, my mentor, my queen @aeriamamaduck, my fandom ride-or-die. Thank you for taking this internet bby under your wing. RACHEL @idancewiththefairies I TRAPPED YOU HERE. MUAHAHAHA xxx Obsession faded: ON GOING. CAN’T STOP, WON’T STOP. Fanfics you NEED to read: jfc, SO MANY.

‘Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches’ and ‘Of Bright Stars and Burning Hearts’ by Reiya @kazliin​ -- Rivals AU companion pieces. Longest fics I’ve ever read and JESUS CHRIST these two fucking SENT ME. Most popular YOI fics on AO3 for a REASON.

‘Tell Me Where Your Love Lies’ by @aeriamamaduck -- Royalty AU, trope-breaking ABO. Ah sweet, TMWYLL, how you’ve killed me over and over again. This BEAUTIFUL wip has SUCH amazing world-building idk where to start (Congrats on passing 50,000 hits!) EVERYONE GO READ IT.

‘Blackbird’ by sixpences -- WWII/Coldwar Spy Fic. I don’t have enough words to describe how amazing this is. It’s elevated to a higher plane beyond fanfic. Just go read it. Thank me later.

‘Zanka’ by rinsled05 @dreaming-fireflies -- The geisha fic that ruined me. *deep breath* AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH *gasp* I’m fine. lol I sooooo not ready for this fic. Holy hell, Aoyagi had my heart in his hands from the first chapter. “’Please’ [...] ‘Don’t give me hope.’“ FUUUUCK.

‘Echoes’ by Reiya @kazliin -- Future fic. First fic I cried at... BOI. I was NOT ready for this. Shouldn’t be surprised given the author, but MAN. “‘A love like that, a love like what they had together, it never leaves completely.’ Yuri spoke again, eyes still staring out onto the ice, lost in memory. ‘There are always echoes.’” JUST FUCK ME UP.

Favourite moments: Oh good lord, where do I begin??

Having two (count ‘em TWO) main characters with mental health issues (Yuuri and his anxiety and Victor with burn out and depression) and NOT MAKING IT THE ONLY ASPECT OF THEIR PERSONALITY. CLAPS FOR KUBO AND YAMAMOTO!!

Everything about Yurio (ESPECIALLY HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH YUUKO AND HIS GRANDPA), that tsundere motherfucker is too pure for this world.

THE KISS. THE PROPOSAL. MY HEART WASN’T READY. AAAAAH!!

This fandom *properly* introducing me to smut on AO3...

Thinking I was going to get Rachel to like the show... NOT being prepared for her to fall off the deep end and START LIKING REAL SKATING TOO!!

Staying up waaaaaay too late waaaaaay too often to plan out plot points for TMWYLL with Sandra. Love ya dearie.

The warm fuzzy feeling I get every time I think about Victor and Yuuri.

April 2020 Bungou Stray Dogs (TV Series)

I had a hunch I was gonna like this show considering ALL of the characters are based off of famous classic authors from around the world... what I was NOT prepared for was just HOW MUCH I was going to love it. HOLY SHIT. The art style? Love it. The plot?? Bonkers, but so fun. THE VOICE CAST??? AMAZING. Highly recommend to anyone who wants to get in to anime, great place to start.

Joined the fandom: April 2020 Obsession peaked: Probably this summer? But we have DEF plateaued in a VERY high place. Fandom friends: FIJI. MA BOIIIII @lil-1nsane  Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Hope it doesn’t Fanfics you NEED to read: So so so many. The smut in this fandom is *chef’s kiss*, but here are a few...

‘He Works Hard For the Money’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- Sugar Daddy AU. FUCK MAN. I was not expecting to like this one, but bloody hell. This fic grabbed me by the throat and WOULD NOT let me go. Praying for chapter 16! But the author is working on another STELLAR fic so I’m okay for now.

‘Everything or Nothing’ by CataclysmicEvent @cataclysmicevent2019​ -- University AU. FUCK THIS FIC. Started reading it as I was waiting for HWHFTM to update and BOI, this fic ROCKS. The alternating POV fits so well with the enemies/idiots-to-lovers vibe. Solid 10 outta 10.

‘The City Where Wind Blows’ by @raven-rein​ -- Cancer Death fic. *pained shriek* AAAAAAGUUUUUUUHHHH *gasp* aaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHHH, FUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKK MEEEEE. THIS FIC. Only the second fic I’ve ever cried to but I BAWLED MY GODDAMN EYES OUT. FUUUUUUUCK. I was not ready, never would have been ready. This is so tremendously well done, it killed me so beautifully, 

‘Haunted by Hatred’ by DeathBelle -- Canon compliant Soukoku. It is a CRIME that DeathBelle doesn’t have more BSD fics on her page, but this one is still brilliant.

Favourite moments:

THE CHUUYA-DAZAI MAFIA REUNION TEAM UP WHEN THEY FIGHT LOVECRAFT. Ooof. BOI. We love it.

The first three episodes. Soooo many break neck plot twists.

Every insane hypothetical conversation with Fiji.

Every time Atsushi or Tanizaki is on screen bc I LOVE THESE LIL BEANS.

June 2020 Trash Taste (Podcast)

Goddamn I love these chaotic lads so much.

As I became more and more comfortable with myself and my love for anime I stumbled upon these three goons, -- Joey, Connor, and Garnt, -- best known for there SUPER successful (mostly) anime YouTube channels. Even if you don’t watch anime, WATCH/LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST. The focus is mostly on their lives and the overall expat/immigrant experience, with a bit of anecdotal anime references sprinkled in. 

This show is both wholesome and heathenous in equal measure, and after having lived abroad for a significant portion of my (admittedly still quite short) life, it was such a breath of fresh air to hear people talk so openly about how living outside your home country is both wonderful and terrifying. They’re wonderfully candid about the fact that even if you love a place dearly, no where is perfect, and you WILL hate somethings about your new home even if the majority of the experience is fantastic. I cannot rate this show highly enough.

Joined the fandom: June 5th 2020, loved it from the first episode. Obsession peaked: July maybe? I was RELIGIOUS about watching the episodes as soon as they came out. Still watch every week, but less “on time.” Fandom friends: None :( but I have tricked my partner in to listening several times :) Obsession faded: It’s dimmed from where it was, but still going strong. Fanfics you NEED to read: NONE. NEVER PLAN TO. Hard and fast rule, I don’t read fics about real people. Characters played by real people, even that’s a maybe for me. But real-real people? FUCK NO. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Any time Garnt and Connor get into a big-brain-monkey-brain argument and Joey is just LOSING his GODDAMN MIND in the corner.

Bringing a retired Japanese porn star in the show for an honest conversation about consensual sex work and showing people can have more than one career in life.

Everything about the, ‘Are Online Friends Real Friends?’ episode. GO WATCH IT, it’s brilliant.

Garnt making “chotto-THE-FUCKING-matte” an expression

August 2020 Great Pretender (TV Series)

Spent most of the summer marinating in my BSD and YOI bubbles, until THIS BAD BOI came up on my Netflix recommendations. HOOOO BOI. This is some Anime Of The Year shit right here. Has a pretty original concept (Catch Me If You Can by way of Oceans 11-ish) but generally starts out like most other shounen (sans the super powers). AND THEN EPISODE FIVE HAPPENS. Not gonna spoil it but they TOOK THAT SHIT UP A NOTCH. Brilliant, even with a bit of an insane ending. GO WATCH THIS ONE.

Joined the fandom: August 2020 Obsession peaked: Pretty much as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: What’s up Fiji ;) @lil-1nsane Obsession faded: Naturally faded, but so glad I watched Fanfics you NEED to read: None so far! Little scared about this one, heard mixed reviews, but maybe someday. Favourite moments:

Edamame’s “madness arc” at the end of season 2. HOOOO BOY.

Laurent getting fucking WRECKED when Edamame punches him mid way through season 2, kills me every time.

Introducing my partner to anime with this show.

October 2020 Attack on Titan (TV Series)

RETURN OF THE KING. lol

In my quest to find an anime that I can watch with my partner, I turned on season 1 of this bad boi. Holy hell I forgot how much I loved this show, NO WONDER everyone lost their goddamn minds when this show first aired. I NEED to catch up before all the season four spoilers come to get me...

Joined the fandom: Winter 2016 Obsession peaked: Basically as soon as I started watching it. Fandom friends: None yet, but I know you’re out there... Obsession faded: 2017, JUST BEFORE SEASON TWO... I should have stuck around longer I know, but it’s slowly coming back. Reeeeeally need to catch up on seasons two, three, and four. Fanfics you NEED to read: GIVE ME YOUR RECS HEATHENS. Favourite moments:

Watching my partner FREAK OUT about Eren’s “death.”

EVERYTHING ABOUT POTATO GORL! lol

Getting in a conversation with a die hard fan after I hadn’t watched it in three years and saying... “Who’s that blond bitch that cries all the time?”/ “Armin?”/ “THAT’S THE ONE!”

November 2020... kind of. Figure Skating (Sport)

Okay this one is a bit hard to explain. 

I have been a DIE HARD figure skating for A LOOOOOONG time. My grandmother got me a hat from the 2002 Olympics in Salt Lake City and I remember watching even then. But I first became consciously aware of different skaters, my faves, etc. from about 2010. I vividly remember watching Plushenko skating in 2014 while on a school trip to Hawaii, and my friends laughing at me as I yelled at the TV.

But I didn’t TRULY get involved in the fandom side of it until this year. I had all this knowledge bottled up, but didn’t have any skating friends to talk to... UNTIL NOW. Super ironic that this happened in a year with almost NO skating, but I’ll take what I can get ;) Also did I stay up until FOUR-GODDAMN-THIRTY IN THE MORNING a few nights ago to stream Japanese Nationals on my phone??? YOU BET I DID.

Joined the fandom: Three times; 2002, 2010, and 2020. Obsession peaked: 2014? 2018? Idk it peaks any time someone does something amazing. Fandom friends: Rachel, my girl @idancewiththefairies​, WHY DIDN’T I INTRODUCE YOU TO THIS SOONER??? Obsession faded: Hasn’t. Won’t. lol Fanfics you NEED to read: NOPE. NONE. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. No fanfics about real people. Never gonna change that. (some of my) Favourite moments:

Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir doing THAT routine at the 2018 Olympics.

Rachel​ sheepishly admitting to me that Shoma may have replaced Yuzu as her favourite, and me being SO DAMN PROUD of her for growing and developing her own skating opinions apart from me.

Yuzu’s 2012 ‘Romeo and Juliet’ routine and Worlds. THE RAW FUCKING POWER OF THAT SKATE.

Plushenko, cheeky bastard, changing his 2014 Team Event routine AS IT WAS HAPPENING.

The worlds friendliest rivalry between Yuzu and Nathan.

Any thing the Shibutani’s do, and all they do to break up the stereotype that all of Ice Dancing has to be rOmAnTiC and SeNsUaL to be good.

Watching my early faves become coaches and the D R A M A.

Honorable Mentions:

Coco (Film): I watched this the weekend I came home and I owe this movie a lot. It is so sweet an heartwarming, and it a roundabout way it brought me back to Tumblr (needed somewhere to vent my feelings considering I watched the movie a solid THREE YEARS after it came out, Tumblr seemed like the place to go lol). Watched in again in 2020 and it’s just as amazing.

Jekyll and Hyde (All media): Loved this book from the first time I read it in my first year of uni. But in December 2019, my fandom understanding reached its PEAK. The musical?? The comic?? YOOOOOO.

Dear Evan Hansen (Musical): I have BARELY engaged in fandom discourse, but the MUSIC. She fucking SLAPS.

Sirius the Jaeger (TV Series): This show is such an underrated gem. It literally has so much; "dead” family drama? Eclectic international group of monster hunters? Cowboys and vampires?? Yes, yes, and YES. And the main character has the same Japanese voice actor as Atsushi from BSD!

Studio Ghilbi (Films): My love affair with Ghibli goes back to when I was about 5 and BEGGED my mom to take me to the library so we could rent Kiki’s Delivery Service on DVD. But that love has been FULLY rejuvenated this year when I went to the Ghibli Film Festival in New York City (ironically in the last week in February). If you haven’t seen them, go watch From Up On Poppy Hill, Whisper of the Heart, and The Wind Rises. Spoilers, you’re probably gonna cry.

If you’ve made it this far, THANK YOU FOR READING! 

And thank you to all the amazing people that made my 2020 not so horrible. Good riddance 2020, don’t let the door hit you on the way out!

[theotherwesley]

tagged by @skyeventide! BRO THANK YOU <3

Rules: Choose your favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

1) Right at the beginning of 2020 (*can we even count the January-February Era as part of 2020? It feels like a separate timeline lol)  I designed a homebrew D&D campaign around an extended-universe Watership Down world, where all player characters are rabbits. :3 I designed it over the winter and DM’d my first test game with my family! It was so, so fun, and I had high hopes of continuing to playtest it and refine the rules this year.... ah, the best laid schemes o’ Buns and Men gang aft agley. U_U

Some samples: 

2) I got a truly awesome commission from a client on FR to do some stained glass window designs for their D&D campaign’s pantheon of gods. I got 4/6 done with them before my computer staged a revolution amongst our household electronics and went into a coma, taking BF’s laptop, a backup disk, and for some reason the toaster, with it. Then after that, the 2020 vibe got really uhhhhhh, shall we say, intense, and even after I found solution for my computer trouble I basically had zero creative fluid in the tank, so this was the last serious art I did for most of the year. :(

 But! I do really like these pieces, and I will eventually get to the remaining two...... sometime. I don’t want to jinx it. >>;

3) Got into a SUPER JUICY and EXTREMELY DENSE long-form RP with @salmaganto​ over on the Tolkien Blog. It involves so much research into historical and logistical minutiae about running a Big Evil Fortress, surviving sieges, uh... managing thrall labor, transitioning between war and peace... It is absolutely my favorite shit lol, just,,, 100% gratuitous worldbuilding nonsense, with my favorite micro-rarepair ship (or rather, its platonic counterpart). Again, this level of creative output, especially dealing with some controversial topics and in-depth analysis of like, authoritarian regimes, lost a looooooooooootttttttt of its um, escapist appeal. I desperately want to pick it back up, but man, this year was a lot, and I’m still recovering.  _( :’| 」∠)＿ We’re all still recovering.

4) Did some nerdy fanart for two of my favorite actual-play shows:

5) Attended a Zoom life-drawing session hosted in Perth, and it was a blast! 

6) Okay so this is a weird one, but, I edited a font??? I’m disproportionately pleased with this niche accomplishment. I had ZERO working knowledge of font design programs, and I went with a free, super nuts-and-bolts shareware application, taught myself how to use the basic functions, and then muddled my way through editing one of my favorite fonts, HamletOrNot:

“Well, this font isn't really Blackletter, but it has a certain historical touch, so it is welcome on these pages. The typeface Hamlet was designed by Edward Johnston for a Shakespeare edition, Cranach Press, 1929. The award winning book Hamlet was considered “the most beautiful book of the year 1930”. HamletOrNot – digitized by Manfred Klein & CybaPee.“ 

If you hunt down the mysterious user “CybaPee”, you find typographer Petra Heidorn and her many, many preserved, historical fonts, which have been painstakingly digitized and made available for free on... well, pretty much every free font website ever, which made it a real pain to source. 

I love this font with my whole heart, and I very much wanted to use it for parts of my comic (you know, the one) but HamletOrNot has a couple of readability failings that made it a bad match for small dialogue, and worse for ME, SPECIFICALLY: it does not include most diacritic marks.  *cries in Tôlkíën* 

So I embarked on this fool’s quest to do some touchups and add the diacritics and special characters I’d need to spell all the crazy bullshit for the comic, because HOW HARD COULD IT BE, HAHA, TO ADD A FEW MARKS AND CLEAN UP A FEW TANGENTS?  HAHAHA. HAHA. .....Anyway, I think I actually started this process sometime in like, 2019, but I FINISHED IT IN 2020, and I’m proud of myself. 

I’m calling the modified font ArdaOrNot, and it looks something like this: 

7)  Oh yeah, about that comic (you know, the one): 

‘Ey, would you look at that! Progress! :D  Slow, agonizing, unoptimized progress! I was hoping I’d have the first six full color pages ready with lettering and everything by the end of 2020, but.... well, here we are. Wow, I am SO TIRED OF BEING SICK, I HAVE THINGS I WANT TO DO SO BAD HAHAHAA FUCK 

8) Another minor accomplishment that I’m disproportionately proud of, I made some new baller playlists and polished up a few old ones to a fine gleam.

Anyway-- I don’t know who has and hasn’t been tagged, but consider this an invitation to anyone who has the energy to post your highlights from the last year. It was actually pretty therapeutic to see some things I DID manage to accomplish, because so much of this damn year felt empty and lonely and barren. But there they stand: the weird little triumphs that were sprinkled throughout the months, somehow improbably blooming in the wasteland. :’)

[excaliefur]

Cathy’s Relationships with the other Queens

DISCLAIMER:

I have written this around what Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss have created, it is not 100% realistic in what happened in history. It is not written around any of the actors, they are not their characters. 

This can be read with platonic love, familial love or romantic love. Read it however you want. !They are not based on the actors! I cannot emphasize that enough!

Its a character study from my point of view, I may write some other fics about somethings I have mentioned here, I already have a plan for the Elizabeth Incident.

TW: Swear words and like some words that aren’t nice I guess?

Catherine of Aragon:

It’s a mother daughter relationship. They weren’t close in the past life since her father died early on in her life and her mother needed to be able to provide for them. Also because Catherine simply didn’t have time and she had other duties to do. Cathy heard a lot of stories about Aragon from her mother, Maud, Aragon’s lady in waiting. When Maud passed away, it killed her. But now in the reincarnation era, she could hear stories about Maud from Aragon. Besides that, they had helped each other a lot from the beginning.

Aragon helped Cathy when Cathy was facing writers block, nightmares, trauma, survivors guilt and many other things, she was a non judgmental figure who was there for her all the time, out of everyone, Cathy was probably the most open to Aragon. Cathy was a common sense filter for Aragon, when she needed to rant about her problems, when she needed another persons opinion, whenever she just needed a shoulder to cry on, Cathy was there for her. On quiet days, they can often be found together, just reading or softly discussing odd things. Aragon is teaching Cathy Latin, and its going well considering the fact that Cathy already knows Spanish, is learning French and German, and she is obsessed with William Shakespeares works. Cathy is helping Anna and Aragon improve their English. 

Anne Boleyn: 

Anne and Cathy had a lot in common. At the beginning, they barely acknowledged each others presence, they bonded when Kat ran away, and when Jane decided to take part in the annual prank war. Soon they were inseparable, they did everything together, they read together, ate together, analysed works of art and slept together (not that way, get your head out of the gutter) Cathy comforted Anne from nightmares and vice versa. That was before the Elizabeth incident. They don’t talk about it anymore. It took time for them to regain each others trust, but slowly they did. And their relationship regained the same level of closeness, maybe even closer. During prank wars, they are almost never allowed to work together, because of Anne’s intelligence partnered with Cathy’s common sense. They are a force to be reckoned with. Normally, Anne comes up with outlandish plans that go against all of science, and Cathy splits up the parts that wont work and fix them so they will. Anne then takes psychology in to hand and they both manipulate their targets right where they want them. Both of them are master manipulators, although Anne hates using it for evil. 

Cathy’s lies saved her life once and now she only uses it for good and she guides Anne as well. Contrary to popular belief. Anne Boleyn is very intelligent and very well rounded in many aspects. She does crosswords daily and she works with Cathy on puzzles and riddles that are very hard to crack. When they went for a team bonding escape room, Cathy and Anne worked out every puzzle. Anne loves to learn and especially with Cathy since Cathy never judges and already knows Annes capability, they are often found watching how do they do it or how is it made together. Sciences are their favourite subjects to learn together although both of them are highly skilled in the arts. Anne and Cathy have a plan to make a comic book series someday, although both of them are master procrastinators. Anne is teaching Cathy french. 

Jane Seymour:

Jane and Cathy had a lot of history, even without ever having met in their past lives. They both died the same ways and Cathy married Thomas Seymour, Jane’s brother. So they were sister in laws and married to the same guy. A bit awkward to talk about. They didn’t ignore each other but they weren’t fighting to spend time with each other. They got so bad that when they began to work on the musical, Cathy, the resident writer. Sat down with everyone individually to get their stories and they would work together to figure out which parts to keep in the musical and which to cut out, for a variety of reasons. But they avoided the conversation for months until the final deadline was approaching and they had nothing written down for Jane’s part. 

Catherine (Aragon) took things into her own hands and forced both of them to sit together and speak, she was there to make sure they stayed but once both of them broke down, she left them to talk. They both broke and started crying, Cathy and Jane had a talk and settled their differences. Now they have a sibling relationship, Cathy protects Jane and vice versa. Jane is often found dragging Cathy from her laptop and forcing her to sleep and cutting her off from coffee when she was close to a caffeine overdose. Cathy had overdosed several times, and every time, Jane had been by her side when she was given activated charcoal and was puking her guts out. Cathy was by Janes side when Jane regained bad memories and had panic attacks from mild fevers and sickness. Jane was terrible when anyone in the house was sick, so if she got sick. It was an all hands on deck situation to calm her and help her rest.

Anna of Cleves:

Anna and Cathy were surprisingly close, they met several times in their past lives, but it was much more formal then. Now they are frequently called the chill squad, they watch from the back seat as shit goes down. Aragon and Jane are the mum squad, Kat and Anne are the beheaded cousins and Anna and Cathy are the chill squad. Anna made witty comments as they watched Anne do something stupid and Kat laughed, and Cathy responded with comebacks as they watch Jane and Aragon yell at them. Anna and Cathy tend to be the laid back ones, and although they seem calm, if you mess with any of the queens, Anna and Cathy are the ones that respond the hardest. Anna has a short temper and is likely to want to yell until her voice is hoarse, which is horrifying and sure to scar anyone, however, Cathy usually comes up with a clever plan that costs the person more than their mental health. Likely their jobs or their marriage. Nothing too extreme. 

They also had their sensitive times. Anna had crippling self esteem issues. What Henry said and did in the past life, may not have seemed to hurt her, but it did; it hurt her bad and she felt awful. While she hid it. Cathy could see through her facade. And broke her down, just so they could rebuild, stronger than ever before. Cathy also had problems with survivors guilt, and who better to help her than another person in the same situation also with survivors guilt. They spent hours talking about stuff they could have done to help others. They ranted to each other, they yelled at each other, they cried to each other. They fought each other as coping mechanisms. Until Aragon found out. Aragon put a stop at those unhealthy coping mechanisms and one day all three of them made a trip to a gym. Aragon told them that they were going to learn boxing. It confused them but they agreed. They took boxing classes for 1 hour and 30 minutes each week and in a year, they were pretty well skilled. Now Cathy and Anna, when they feel overwhelmed by anything. Instead of taking it out on each other, they box fair and square. Cathy and Anna are best friends and can be seen in the gym practicing hard, or on the roof, stargazing and chilling. Cathy loves to learn new things and she spent hours with Anna just learning about Germany and German culture, it helped Anna relieve burden as well. Anna is teaching Cathy German now and Cathy is helping Anna improve her English. 

Katherine Howard:

Cathy and Kat were probably the closest from when they first met. In their first lives, Cathy met both Katherine Howard and Anna of Cleves when she was in Mary I’s household. Cathy is constantly by Kat’s side whenever she needs it. She is the only one who is allowed to call Kat kid. It used to be term of endearment but when Cathy accidentally called her kid, Kat felt safe. They have a sibling relationship where Cathy is the older over protective sister and Kat is the innocent, naive but scarred younger sister. Cathy is the kindest towards Kat than anyone else. She sort of stands behind Kat as Kat does some silly stuff looking intimidating and scaring anyone who would dare to mess with Kat. Kat is oblivious to all of it. Kat generally goes to Anne or Jane for anything to do with nightmares but Cathy is always ready to help her out. Often, neither of them get sleep so they have a Disney movie marathon until one of them fall asleep. 

Kat persuades Cathy away from work using cuddles and her puppy dog eyes. Often times at night when Kat can’t sleep she just enters Cathy’s room and watches her work. Those times Cathy also goes to sleep. Jane and Aragon’s secret weapon when they can’t get her off of her laptop and Anna can’t force her into her bed, is Kat. Cathy cannot say no to Kat. Anne became overly protective of Kat and refused to let her near Cathy during the Elizabeth incident, but Kat broke out of her grip and everyone made up. To this day, whenever anybody goes at Kat, calling her a sl*t or a wh*re, their life will be ruined by Cathy, as much as Cathy would love to deck them. She knows how to ruin somebody’s life by a single phone call. Although Cathy was extremely short, her glare could paralyse a grown man.

[empress-of-snark]

Cursed Child Review!

(this will contain only the vaguest spoilers--you have been warned)

(also tumblr is being dumb and refusing to let me upload this with pictures, so expect a second post later with pictures)

THE THEATRE

So first of all, the Lyric Theatre is gorgeous. It was renovated specifically for this show, so the design is full of all kinds of Harry Potter references. Inside, the carpet is red with a Hogwarts ‘H’ pattern, and the ceiling is blue with gold stars.

Also, directly across from the entrance, on the way to the gift shop, there’s a small, circular room with patronuses painted all over the walls! They got all the major characters (minus Albus and Scorpius, but we don’t know their patronuses, do we?), as well as play quotes from each:

Speaking of the gift shop, I absolutely bought a Ravenclaw scarf and iron-on patch for my denim jacket. I wanted so badly to buy a replica wand as well (if I remember correctly, they had Harry, Ron, Hermione, Albus, Scorpius, and Voldemort), but they were pretty expensive and I couldn’t decide on a character anyway.

Also, funny thing, we got two playbills—one for Part One, and one for Part Two—and… they’re exactly alike. There’s nothing at all different except for a very slight alteration in cover art and the fact that they’re labeled Part One and Part Two. The insides are identical, lol. Weird.

THE PLOT

There’s really nothing to be said about the plot that hasn’t already been said. It’s not great. It’s not terrible either, honestly, but it’s not great. In terms of alternate HP content, I’d put it below Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, but above Crimes of Grindelwald.

Part One is definitely the stronger half, plot-wise. Part Two is where everything goes a little off the rails and you start thinking “wait a second, did J.K. Rowling actually come up with this or is this just straight-up fanfiction that someone wrote in 2009?” Again, no spoilers, but… the Act III, Scene XXI plot twist is contrived and kind of ridiculous and seeing it played out on stage does nothing to improve my opinion on it.

THE CHARACTERS

Albus and Scorpius were phenomenal! To be honest, Albus has never really interested me as a character very much, he’s always just come across as a sullen teenager, but Nicholas Podany made me like him more than I did in my initial readings of the script.

Scorpius, though. SCORPIUS. I knew he was an adorable geek when I read the script, but seeing it on stage is just so much better. He’s the absolute cutest character and I adored him. Also, major props to Bubba Weiler’s physicality because it was awesome. His lounging awkwardly on the stairs and giving finger-guns to Rose in Act IV was priceless. Absolute cinnamon roll.

Speaking of Rose, I feel like I should talk about the whole shipping war thing of Rose/Scorpius vs. Albus/Scorpius, but honestly I don’t wanna drag this down into fandom wank, so maybe I’ll make a separate post later. Suffice it to say, I totally 100% understand why people ship Albus and Scorpius, but I also think we should be allowed to have other interpretations and sometimes people on the internet don’t understand what true friendship is supposed to be like despite constantly calling for more platonic friendships in the media.

Anyway.

Harry and Hermione were awesome. I know people complained about Harry’s characterization, but honestly, I think it’s similar to what happened with Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi. People don’t like watching their childhood heroes grow into flawed adults who make mistakes, and I understand. It’s hard to see Harry being such a strict father and saying or doing things that he regrets, but that’s what characters are supposed to be like. Harry is not perfect and he’s always had a bit of a temper. For the first eleven years of his life, he didn’t have a good father figure to guide him so as an adult, it makes sense that he would fumble a bit in fatherhood because he has no one to really base himself on, and he literally says this in Act IV.

Hermione didn’t have as much of a character arc, but she was excellent. Her characterization was on-point and I loved her. There was a moment I especially loved where she hugs Rose around the middle of Act III. There’s no dialogue and it’s only a brief moment, but it was beautiful. With context, it’ll make more sense why, but again, no spoilers.

Finally, my boy Ron Weasley, was… comic relief. Why am I not surprised. Functionally, he did almost nothing of any importance for the plot—they could’ve taken him out completely and it wouldn’t have made much of a difference. While he did have some good, genuinely funny moments (they included his line from the book when, in answer to Albus saying that everyone is staring at them at King’s Cross, he said “It’s me. I’m extremely famous.”) but he also has some really dumb, out-of-character moments as well (at one point, in response to a threat, he… pulled out his wand… backwards… and had to fix it… get it? Cause he’s stupid!).

That’s not to say the actor did a bad job. He did the best he could with the terrible characterization. But the bright side is, we got several really good Ron/Hermione scenes that were stupidly adorable and made my heart happy. My two favorites were, of course, the staircase scene in Act II and the scene in Hermione’s office in Act III.

Draco was great, I loved his relationship with Scorpius and how it grew, and I loved his reluctant allegiance with the Golden Trio.

Ginny was pretty good, though I wish they had given her a bit more to do at times.

I also wish Rose had gotten to be more a part of the action, but I get why, for a lot of the play, she couldn’t be involved in the plot. For spoiler-y reasons.

THE SPECIAL EFFECTS

This is the real reason people see this play, and it is worth it! It’s worth sitting through the weirder parts of the plot. Some of the illusions I could figure out (a lot of them were either clever use of the fly system or two actors hiding in the same robe), but some I’m pretty sure were just genuine magic because I don’t know how they pulled them off.

Characters Polyjuice and Transfigure themselves into other characters, wands light up and even shoot fire (at one point, a lot of wands were shooting fire simultaneously during a multi-character duel and I don’t understand how the set didn’t catch on fire), a bookcase comes alive and eats three people and spits them back out again, and the DEMENTORS.

There were DEMENTORS and they were SPOOKY and AWESOME and I wish so badly that we had been in balcony seats because at one point, a dementor comes out over the audience and we were so far back that we could barely see it.

Also I don’t think it’s a huge spoiler to say that the show involves use of a Time Turner, and every time it was used, they did something really cool with the lights that gave the whole stage a ripple effect and I have no idea what it was they did, but it looked SO COOL.

IN SUMMARY

The building was gorgeous, the plot was just okay (better in the first half), the characters varied but were mostly good (all the actors were amazing), and the special effects are absolutely the best part of the show, hands down.

People have said that this show shouldn’t ever be professionally recorded because watching a DVD will never compare to seeing it live. I agree that the live experience is undoubtedly better, that’s the case with every play. Live is always better. But it’s not always possible for people to drop hundreds of dollars on a plane ride and Broadway tickets. Our tickets for Cursed Child were expensive, and we didn’t even get the best seats. I can’t believe how elitist people can be in thinking that if, for whatever reason, you can’t afford to see a Broadway show, then you shouldn’t be given a cheaper, more accessible option.

Also, like, I’m never going to be able to see the original Broadway cast of Into the Woods live because that show was running in 1987, but thanks to the professionally filmed DVD, I can watch it whenever I want and I love it. Money and time should not stop someone from experiencing theatre, ever.

Anyway, it was an amazing experience and I’m so glad I went! If anyone wants to talk more about it, or get my more spoiler-y opinions, shoot me a message! If you go anon, I’ll tag all responses with #cursed child spoilers.

[readingwebcomics]

Analyzing Questionable Content: Pages 51-100

No Faye, it only looks that way because he’s playing Final Fantasy X-2. Good God, I just realized that Final Fantasy X-2 is someone’s first experience with Final Fantasy. That’s a depressing thought. Although someone starting out the series with Final Fantasy XIII is probably way worse, now that I think about it. At least X-2 had fun.

…huh? Oh right, the comic. You sure you’d rather not listen to me write an essay on Final Fantasy, instead? I have this great point about how Final Fantasy IX has the most emotionally impactful narrative but as a game it only really clicks with long-time players of… no? Okay fine, let’s get back into QC.

The very next comic has Marten getting a tax return check for $1,100, and being the wise adult that he is, decides to spend that money on a new guitar. Tagging along, Faye brings up something that gives us new insight on her character:

And clearly didn’t bore her, considering how much of that information she retained. Here we have yet another example of a shared interest between these two, Marten clearly being into Guitars if he’s invested enough to blow a fat wad of money on it and Faye carrying around quite a bit of information on the instrument herself. I’ve made the point in the last post, but to reiterate – at this point in the comic, it’s clear these two are clicking as far as interests go. They can keep up with each other, can and have provided support for one another, and challenge one another… okay granted that last one isn’t entirely true, it’s clear Faye challenges Marten more than vice-versa, but still. There is a clear, acting relationship dynamic between these two, whether platonic or romantic. The reason why early QC works as well as it does is because these two have clear characters to them and their relationship FEELS real – they feel like people you’d know who’d really be friends – or maybe more than friends. This is Jeph’s character writing at… well I hesitate to call it at its best because to imply he peaked as early as the 53rd comic would be an insult to him as a writer, and I’m not looking to do that here.

I’m looking to do that a little bit later on in this part when we discuss Faye’s “character quirk.”

Before that however, we’re going to get a little bit on insight on Marten:

The story is elaborated on in a future comic, but here we get Marten’s backstory – traveling across the country for a girl, the relationship falling apart and leaving him stuck in this part of the country. This will go on to explain several of his character choices, including Pintsize (although that’s something we’re not going to approach until MUCH later on). It also further elaborates on Marten’s character as a whole: He doesn’t make many active actions as a whole, but when he does, it tends to shift the entire dynamic of how he lives. He decided he wanted to follow this woman across the country, and that action ended up completely upending his life. Could this be part of the reason why Marten is so passive? Does he skew towards this lifestyle because he’s been “trained” to take any kind of affirmative action as an intense, life-changing event?

While I’m not certain myself, and I have a damn good feeling Jeph wasn’t thinking that far ahead when writing Marten’s character, it’s an angle I’m willing to continue exploring as we further our journey down this comic’s history.

This comic was written in 2003. I’m half-tempted to believe Meme culture can be tracked by indie bands now. Wonder if there was any zeitgeist with neo-nazi indie bands ten or fifteen years ago then, if that theory holds true?

…I just made myself really, really sad.

Later on, Pintsize proceeds to eat a cake when he really shouldn’t – again – and we are gifted with… this lovely image.

Okay. I understand Pintsize is an AI, so it makes total sense for him to be able to be uploaded to a PC like this (ignoring for the moment modern commercial hardware can’t possibly support the resources necessary to maintain human-level sapience and ESPECIALLY not in 2003), but this is one of the freakiest fucking things I’ve seen from this comic. Mostly because at the time of writing we’re on comic 4000 and AI as a whole take an entirely different turn in the world of QC around that time, so… this is just kinda surreal to look at.

…We’ll get to AI in regards to QC’s universe later on when it becomes more relevant. Needless to say, it becomes one of the core “themes” of the comic as a whole.

The narrative reason for this turn of events is simple:

Pintsize is now in a new visually appealing model, capable of moving his joints around so he can do more than just stand around and talk!

…also one that has a horrifying government-level laser built into it! Believe it or not, this DOES become a relevant plot-point later and it’s not just for the sake of a gag. This is a great example of Jeph taking a tiny detail he may have originally written in as a joke and building off it to create conflict… although I’ll be getting more into that later on when it actually DOES become relevant.

Pintsize agrees to turn the laser off, and a few comics later Marten and Steve go to the bar to discuss their lives – specifically Marten’s love life.

Further showcasing of Marten’s passive nature and his straight-up lack of confidence.

Say goodbye to Sara everyone – for real this time, I’m fairly certain this is the very last time we ever see her. I could be mistaken, but I highly doubt it. Plus, while we don’t see it in detail we get enough information to gleam Steve as Marten’s exact opposite – charming without being overwhelming, confident without being cocky. Steve is just straight-up a cool dude, and it’s easy to see how he can easily get into relationships while Marten stays there floating along, too scared and/or passive to make the move that comes to Steve naturally.

Wait. Shit, I may have the hots for Steve. Abort, aboRT, ABOR-

I’m showing this in part to showcase the next point of conflict and also to draw attention to the new style Jeph is trying. He’ll do this throughout the run of QC, trying out brand-new styles to see what fits and what doesn’t. I’ll be including this in my comparison pictures at the very end of this post to give a clearer image of what changes and how he improves… although you can see even in this comic he’s struggling against old habits as Marten’s face in the final panel looks drastically different than in the rest, looking more akin to how he looked in older comics. That’s okay! Habits die hard, it’s worth applauding the fact that Jeph is trying. God knows I can’t draw to save my fucking life, so I’ll always support artists trying new things.

I’m mostly including this panel for two reasons: The fact that Faye’s stuck in the closet right now – if you don’t get why that’s funny, you will in about 3700 comics from now – and the way she’s talking. Do you notice something different about the “feel” of Faye’s dialogue? Keep an eye on it, I’ll try to include more panels of her talking from this point onward.

Anyway, Marten dismantles the previously established conflict by revealing he managed to get Faye’s prescription for her and got her a new pair of glasses.

Mark this as the second time Faye has actually displayed real physical aggression against Marten.

Again, depending on how much you know about AI in QC’s world from future comics this could either be a lot funnier or a hell of a lot less funny. Although… the subject of AI mortality would make for an EXTREMELY interesting plot point in more recent comics. Remind me to touch on that when we get further along.

Again: Pay attention to Faye’s dialogue in this comic, especially in that last panel. You’re noticing it, aren’t you? The fact that she sounds a little… different? Give me a little more time, I promise I’ll touch on it a little later.

Hey, guess what? It’s later!

Faye does not punch Marten whenever she says something nice about him. In fact, she has ever only assaulted Marten twice – both times for completely arbitrary reasons not related to her saying anything to or about Marten. Nor has Faye ever spoken completely without contractions, as you see she’s doing now. Later comics will go on to point out how odd it is that Faye only speaks with contractions when she’s drunk and dips into her southern accent… when we’ve seen in previous comics that she is capable of speaking with contractions and talking like a normal human being. This change has shifted the entire “feel” of every line of Faye’s dialogue, as she no longer “sounds” like the Faye we started the comic with.

These are both examples of a writing mistake that a lot of long-form regular updating writers make, be it fanfiction or daily comics – retcons. If you’re reading this, you most likely know what a retcon is. For the few of you that don’t, a retcon – short for retroactive continuity – is the practice of in later works of an ongoing series introducing a fact that changes what was previously established in previous works. This is most commonly seen in Superhero comics from Marvel and DC, but the kind of retcon I’m talking about is more common on smaller scale works, like fanfiction or unedited novels or ongoing RPs.

See, when the writer realizes they wanted to change up something, introduce a plot element that would require them to go back and change something previously to make it make sense and find that for whatever reason they can’t, they may go ahead and introduce the plot element anyway while assuring the reader that no, of course this element was always included. That’s what’s happening here – Jeph had an idea for a plot element he wants to include, realized he can’t exactly go back to older comics and change them considering it’s a regularly updated webcomic, and so decided to retcon these facts by introducing them like they’ve always been a part of things and assert their truth while continuing on.

Not that I can necessarily blame the man – in a situation like this, realizing there’s an important plot element that you want to work with but can’t due to you leaving it no room in what you’ve previously published, there’s not much else you can do besides either retconning things or accepting you can’t introduce that plot element and just move on. However, there are other ways you can work with this that abide by previously established continuity and lets you introduce a plot element you want to introduce. For example, Faye punching Marten: You could introduce it as something she feels more comfortable doing the longer she’s around him. Have more frequent comics of her following saying something nice up with a punch, let us see her actually assault him more, and draw a correlation between her getting more comfortable around him and her getting more physically aggressive – something Jeph does touch on later, so it is entirely possible to introduce this new dynamic without asserting things have happened that we clearly see haven’t happened.

…as for Faye not speaking in contractions however, that’s just stupid. It’s a gimmick for her character, plain and simple, without adding anything to her as a character. If you want something big to showcase she’s keeping herself restrained, just continue as you were, having her speak in a southern accent when she’s drunk. That works as a fun gag to attach to her character without seeming like a dumb gimmick. And I’m sorry to say… this whole “Faye doesn’t speak in contractions” thing? It’s a dumb gimmick.

Okay, now that I’ve gotten that all off my chest, let’s introduce ourselves to the new main character of QC…

This is Dora, the owner of the Coffee Shop that Faye works at. She’s a cool cat and (seemingly) supremely chill. She’s introduced as another secondary character like Steve, but will swiftly become a mainstay character and join what will become a growing ensemble cast.

Also, potential conflict is seeded when it’s revealed she’s totally crushing on Marten.

And if you doubt Faye’s assessment, let’s hear it from the woman in question herself.

Also say hello to Dora’s cat. The cat has a name, I just can’t remember it for the life of me considering the little fella joins Sara on that island eventually. But yeah, Dora DEFINITELY has the hots for Marten, sewing another potential seed for conflict later on – Marten and Faye are certainly in the “will they or won’t they?” phase, and here sits Faye’s own boss with a clear, vested interest in Marten. Will she make a move and push Faye to take action? Time will tell.

Jeph enjoys trolling his audience, and Marten is suffering because of it.

Dora goes on to establish herself in the reader’s minds by having a clear, distinct personality that bounces off Faye’s beautifully. They banter so comfortably with one another it makes it so much fun to read, which goes on to make Dora a more appealing character to the reader. The more she talks, the more you want to see her because she’s such a genuinely charismatic individual… which can further serve to establish her as a very real conflict in the potential Marten and Faye relationship. After all, what’s a greater spanner in the works of this “will they or won’t they?” relationship than a character who will gladly say “Yeah, I will” that the audience likes enough that they are completely on-board with seeing go through?

The most dangerous thing to a romcom relationship is a third wheel that a good portion of the audience prefers over the teased relationship, and that creates good drama.

(Also Sara’s name is spelled wrong but eh it’s not like she’s around to complain anyway)

…that said, Dora goes on to assure Faye that she has no intention of swiping Marten off his feet away from her when it’s clear Faye’s interested in him. Then again… the more Faye insists she’s not interested in him, the more likely it may be that Dora believes her.

True story, I found this concept so funny that in a campaign I ran a few years ago, I actually had one of the players – who was supposed to be stuck as a worker in a dreary 9-to-5 job that he’d desperately want to escape to go onto adventure – be labeled as the Office Bitch. My only regret is that I didn’t print out a real business card for his player. That either would have gotten a laugh from the table or gotten me punched.

This here is Scott, Marten’s boss. He’s a cool dude, but for reasons that will become evident later on we don’t see very much of him. At first, I thought he was going to end up being the future husband of Marten’s father – and if you haven’t read through QC yourself that sentence will probably completely catch you flat-footed – but looking it up later I found that Marten marries a man named Maurice, not Scott. I only thought they were the same person because they’re both blonde and the art style changes so much later on anyone could look like anyone else.

Actually, fun fact: I started reading QC when 2512 was the most recent comic, so before she was introduced I thought Faye and Marigold were the same person because of how drastically the art style changed and I only recognized “curvy white girl with glasses and brown hair”.

Anyway, Scott’s pretty chill and… yeah. Yeah, that’s pretty much it. He’s a chill dude to work for, and that’s probably the only reason Marten hasn’t outright quit his job yet. The worst job in the world can be made tolerable with a good boss, and the best job in the world can be made unbearable with an awful boss.

Further evidence of the lack of contractions hurting the way Faye’s voice comes across than anything else. Seriously, is it just me or does this not sound like Faye? Like, at ALL? I’m open to being told I’m wrong, just… seriously.

Aaaand here we have Steve officially having broken up with Sara. Also, it’s a small thing but like I’ve said, I’ll give Jeph credit where it’s due – that visible wince on Marten’s face is the most expressive any of his characters have been thus far. Good work man, I’m happy to see you improving with your art!

After drinking together, Marten and Faye decide to go to an all-night diner for some drunken late-night pancakes when we get this bit of information from Faye:

That is Faye, if you can figure out which of the two Martens your fist will connect with. But yeah, the fact that Faye speaks in a southern drawl while intoxicated went from a joke to actual character – she’s legitimately from Georgia and that’s her natural way of speaking. Which may raise the question to the reader, why does she repress that voice so much? Don’t worry – they touch on it in later comics. For now though, another round of applause to Jeph for slowly and organically creating new information about his characters.

Faye is clearly not telling the whole story – the lack of eye contact being a key indicator of just that. Still, we’re getting a little bit more information on her, and the fact that she kept her wording vague leaves a lot to still explore in her future. Needless to say… it was a LOT more than just her mother being over-protective that led her to moving up north.

Marten’s just kind of accepted his lot in life by this point. Although when I was first reading through these I honestly thought this was going to be the headbutt-into-crotch moment.

Once again, if you haven’t read through QC yourself that sentence made zero sense to you. I’m kind of giggling at the thought of someone reading that and doing a double-take, actually.

Finally, we have the last comic of this batch, setting up a bit of conflict for our next batch…

Wuh-oh! Marten walked in on Faye changing! One really nice detail is that you can see the scar on Faye’s chest right there in the first panel, which means Jeph had a LOT of Faye’s backstory already planned out while he was drawing this stuff. Which just leaves me to wonder… how far back did he have this planned? When Faye first showed up in the third comic? When he had her start speaking in a southern accent while drunk? When he decided to have her stop speaking in contractions? I’d love to ask him, but I know for a fact he wouldn’t give me the time of day. Oh well, either way: He’s got shit planned out, shit that we won’t see until Comic 500 or so, and that’s always good for a long-form comic like this.

Like last time, let’s do some quick comparisons between the first comic of the batch, the comic where Jeph made a clear and active effort to change the art style, and the last comic of the batch:

It looks like Jeph found a happy medium between the style he was originally going for and the newer style he tried to incorporate, keeping the relative size and position of the characters’ facial features while rounding out everyone’s faces, making things much less angular than previously. The bodies are also beginning to get some real texture to them, looking closer to real human bodies than stick figures with a shirt.

Overall, what did I think about this batch of comics? Well aside from my complaints about Faye’s lack of using contractions and the sloppy way Jeph tried to incorporate that into the narrative, I thought it was better than the first batch! Marten and Faye are getting into a comfortable rhythm with each other, and we’re falling in-line with that rhythm ourselves. We just met a new character who’s going to be a mainstay of the series and in the few comics she’s shown up in, she’s made her presence stick with the reader. Even if I didn’t know how important Dora would become, I’d be saying I’m looking forward to seeing more of her.

You know what time it is now? That’s riiiiiight! Data compilation time!

Between comics 51-100, the following characters’ proportional “screen time” as it were are as follows:

Marten: 46/50 – 92%

Faye: 45/50 – 90%

Pintsize: 12/50 – 24%

Dora: 8/50 – 16%

Steve: 6/50 – 12%

Sara: 2/50 – 4%

Scott: 2/50 – 4%

Dora’s Cat: 1/50 – 2%

And the grand total of each character’s screentime, not including non-canon or guest comics, from most to least time shown:

Marten: 91/100 – 91%

Faye: 83/100 – 83%

Pintsize: 27/100 – 27%

Steve: 14/100 – 14%

Dora: 8/100 – 8%

Sara: 7/100 – 7%

Jim: 2/100 – 2%

Scott: 2/100 – 2%

Raven: 1/100 – 1%

Dora’s Cat: 1/100 – 1%

Yes, I’m counting Dora’s cat among the statistics. I’ll change the name when I learn what the critter’s name actually is. Also, I was reminded that when the Secret Bakery becomes a thing later on in the comic there will be another character named Jim, with this particular construction worker being called Jimbo instead. I’ll change the name properly when he’s called “Jimbo” proper in the comic, don’t worry. I’ll be doing my best to keep this list from getting confusing… it’s in as much my best interest as yours seeing as I want to keep track of everyone properly.

Tune in next week when we see the exciting conclusion of this spicy “Marten happening to walk in on Faye undressing” drama! And Dora flashing someone. See you then.

[serahne]

Naegiri, Kiiruma and Saiaka

Naegiri

1. My take on their canon relationship : A girl with a lot of determination and who thinks she can carry everything on her shoulders all by herself learns to trust a boy who might be a little lost, but never stops to believe in others and in a positive outcome.

2. Do I ship them : Not the most original dynamic ever, but it’s still good and well-done. I’m always finding myself falling back in love with them whenever I play dr1.

3. Reasons why I do/don’t ship them : They are just good for each other ? Anytime I ship people, it’s always because I think they reveal interesting parts in each other, that they didn’t suspect they had, and Naegi/ri is perfect, in that it doesn’t feel ‘forced’ : whether you like it better in a platonic or romantic way, they are part of each other’s developement, and their story couldn’t be told otherwise.

Also this is the only ship I love that is supported by TPTB and 95% of the fandom and it’s nice to be in that boat. Het ships have this advantage, maybe I should try to ship them more.

4. Headcanon, if any : Pretty much canon with dr3, but they take forever to get together, and everyone is so done with it and just want them to get together once and for all. Even Togami gets invested in this relationship for his own peace of mind.

5. How much do I ship (%): 100% It’s the original OTP from dr1, and I was so pleasantly surprised to see this kind of relationship in japanese visual novel. I like Kirigiri way more than Naegi, though, but I love her so much that I accept that she choose Naegi ( do I make any sense ? ). Kinda like Hermione and Ron.

Also, I tries everyday to forget about dr3, because Naegiri really got screwed over in this.

Kiiruma

1. My take on their canon relationship : Genius Girl who would rather be a robot bonds with an Awkward Robot who is really torns between wanting to be accepted as a human and being proud of being a robot.

2. Do I ship them : Sure, they are so dorky. I love them.

3. Reasons why I do/don’t ship them : I do ship them because they are kinda perfect for each other in their weirdness. They are a great comical duo, not only because Miu is hilarious herself, but when she is paired with Kiibo’s weird determination, it’s gold. I enjoyed them in the anthology a lot too, because Miu with her usual honesty was like ‘ why the heck would you want me to modify you because Kokichi talked shit, you’re a piece of amazing work as it is’. Same for their TDP scenes, it’s just nice to see two people who are so complicated and extreme have such easy-going relationship.

4. Headcanon, if any : They both really enjoy watching monster movies, especially the very bad ones. Miu is super excited when the Big Monster smashes an entire city, and Kiibo is always waaaay too invested in this kind of stupid plot.

5. How much do I ship (%): 95% ! I wish we had some confirmation on Miu’s part that she liked Kiibo, but… it’s Miu, and it’s also for the best that it’s not forced down our throat. Still. I crave more content.

Saiaka ( for a second I thought you meant Sayaka/Kaede, i’m still not used to ndrv3 ships having four or five ship names, soblol )

1. My take on their canon relationship : Kaede has a strong personality, and attracts Shuichi who clearly needs to feed on someone’s strenght to survive. They somehow enjoy each other’s presence.

2. Do I ship them : A bit. Let’s say the jury is still out on this ship, but there are moments I liked with them - it would be hard not to, since they spend the entire first chapter together. I feel like the fact that all the emotional build-up between them leading to Kaede being fridged for Shuichi’s evolution really tampers my appreciation of the ship.

3. Reasons why I do/don’t ship them : I ship them because they are cute, they work well together, they complete each other… I can’t say I dislike them in chapter 1, even Shuichi’s co-dependancy is charming until he almost throws everyone under the bus to save her.

My problem is really about everything around the canon. After Kaede’s death, she becomes some kind of ‘perfect’ symbol and that wasn’t needed at all, even if I get that this is from Shuichi’s POV. Her FTE ( in the Salmon Mode ) with Shuichi are also very disturbing and really makes her regress to the statue of ‘virtual girlfriend’ (all her FTE are about Shuichi, not herself). And yes, it’s not canon, but it leaves a weird taste in my mouth.

4. Headcanon, if any : Kaede always organizes some kind of Treasure Hunt for Shuichi whenever it’s his birthday, and she always hire Kaito and Maki to play some kind of role, and they really have a good time because Shuichi actually loves investigating, he just dislikes murder and crimes.

5. How much do I ship (%): 50%. It’s a fine ship, I have no problem writing it or even reading it, but I wish the writing was a little less biased after Kaede’s death. Like, after Maizono’s death, Naegi still holds affection for her, but he doesn’t build a statue in honor of her perfection either. He allows her - and through Naegi, the audience - to see her as a ‘real’ character with depth and contradiction. Kaede isn’t allowed that, and that makes her relationship with Shuichi a lot less meaningful on the long run.

[serak-sarak-meta-sarahk]

As a Model I Got Stalked by a Porn Cam Girl Who Couldn’t Let Go of Her High School Ex Boyfriend in College and How I Dealt

So for those who don’t know, on top of modeling I was an elite springboard and platform diver, in the Olympic track. Technically I left modeling for sports after modeling got scary, but I still dabbled in the clean side of the industry.

I technically started being recruited by The University of Alabama by age 14 years old, well that was my first real trip to campus anyways.

I liked the University of Alabama, because their art program is located near Birmingham, which is an indie designer fashion hub of America. After watching Project Runway on binge growing up, I wanted to support the industry there.

However, as soon as I got to campus on my first or second night I was asked on the team who I would either make out with or hook up with before I knew any of the guys on the team, or girls if I were to go that way for a matter of fact. I was also coming off a myriad of injuries that were half attended to with doctors, after my dad left. My mother lied and said we didn’t have health insurance anymore.

So, I get to campus, and meet this guy Joseph James Pursley (DOB: 10/21/1994, causasion male). On the first day, I didn’t realize he was our head coaches son, because I was a diver and his father was a swimming coach. I told my teammates that I thought he was cute, they told me he was the head coaches son. Hearing how psychopathic our new head swim coach was from the rest of the team before showing up, I wrote him off.

To be fair, Joseph James Pursley does suffer from a myriad of drug and alcohol addictions. I’ve watched him pound a full bottle of wine in one sitting then run to the shower to barf. He would ask me to act out rape scenes with him, because it turned him on according to him. On spring break, I woke up from a daytime vacation nap to him passed out barfing in and breaking the rental home shower once. He uses these things called whippets to get high. He was the mens team Vyvanse supplier when he wasn’t even on scholarship to be on the team. He once punched a crack in his own car windshield as I gave him a sober ride home. He would openly tell me how much he wanted to die or join the military to get me to help him with his homework. He has a cocaine addiction. He once kicked a girl in a twister costumer to the floor on Halloween. And, he wouldn’t let me break up with him, ever. As hard as I tried.

By the end of this relationship I was waking up everyday in panic attacks, or ending the night with anxiety attacks over what JJ Pursley thought of himself while he used drugs. He would do cocaine and speak out of his head. He would else me into sex while he was on psychedelics and I was not. Police were getting called to his home and I would have to go over to try to help during my workday, not mine. Below is an image of what he did to my face. I asked him no repetitively 5 times before I was thrown into the asphalt concrete. Essentially, I was waking up everyday fighting for my own life or having an anxiety attack over what JJ was going to make me do in the night while I slept.

Anytime I talk to police about this situation I get light headed and almost pass out. My mother knew his father where she was from, so she does little to advocate for me at all.

However, I now have advocacy groups working to protect me in the state of Texas from JJ Pursley and everyone still connected to him. I’ve just never known how well these avenues work for kids frok.places like where I’m from.

Time and time again, the United States has shown that no one gives a fuck to help the little kids from the projects of Cincinatti and we do nothing to warrant it. I am hoping that this political shift brings that, if nothing else at all, for once, actually representing kids from the projects.

And what they actually have to fight through to survive and what their usually single parents have to do to get them out of it. One parent is always a hard addict and the other can never seem to do enough to get their own family resources. For me my mother was a HARD addict in the state of Kentucky for a LONG time. After the things I saw my mom do to herself, I don’t even understand how she is alive. I’m always pushing my mom to get clean, but fact of the matter is, she never stays clean. She will scream she hates drugs as she is abusing them behind closed doors. Diet pills, injectables, painkiller pills, alcohol, whatever she can get her hands on.

My mother has also been getting model sued for the greater portion of her adult life whenever she starts using again. Which seems to be anytime I leave the door to start life on my own. Then, I deal with the ramifications of my mom being an addict. I CANNOT LEAVE MY HOUSE IN AMERICA WITHOUT BEING ACCUSED OF BEING AN ADDICT BECAUSE OF MY MOTHER. AND. I. AM. SOBER.

No one thinks this is real, but when you get out of the projects, people try to attack you and your kids through their whole lives as you progress beyond it. Because there is a side of the country who thinks kids from the projects don’t deserve to get out of it.

Two weeks after I arrived at school, his father paired us in the same team building group. He seemed fairly normal this day as a person, but then again he was also sober this day to my knowledge as we were required to be as far as I knew. Then he began pursuing me at parties.

One night, when I was the sober driver for the team, he asked me to give him rides to pick up his friends because his cell phone minutes were apparently out at the time. I later learned that his parents had to put him on minutes because of his addiction to naked images of girls from his high school. He would tell me how guys in his high school would fill their phones up with nudes and then trade Sim cards so that everyone got a little bit of every girls nude images. So, his parents had to move him mid year of school from Arizona to Alabama.

He didn’t tell me it was this serious until after we started dating and his personal porn girl began attacking me directly. I am a girl who had never sent nudes at all by college.

I grew up primarily Hellenist as my religion, and this is something WE DO NOT DO within hellenism. Strictly, I was told our gods would be angered at me if I ever shot nude for a man in a porn sense or sent full porn type nudes to a man for his sexual attention unless it was my boyfriend or full time partner that I trusted to protect me.

He just told me that he had gotten into some trouble in high school, however he had gotten accepted by the coaches onto the team, so I figured he was trying to do better. I was never told to judge people by their past mistakes. However, in JJ Pursleys case, I wish I had.

We actually did become friends before we dated. We would actually spend sober platonic time together, but I also hung out with his roommates so I didn’t think he was a danger to me. In short, I wasn’t scared of a digital pimp.

The first time we “hooked up” we only really made out, and then the next day he told me he had a girlfriend that he hadn’t mentioned previously while getting to know me. After he told me,I told him u was sorry and made up an excuse to leave the situation. So, all was good and dandy. Then the party stalking began.

I coukd not attend a team party in the same room as JJ Pursley without him eventually finding himself standing directly behind me or three feet away from me trying to talk. If I would give him the time of day, he woukd follow me around the party like a lost dog. Then I started noticing how alcoholic he was. He would borrow my car to take his friends to smoke in it without me attending with them.

He would find ways to place himself in the same places as me. However, he was uninterested in leaving the dorm to try any of the clubs I had joined to try tonget acquainted to campus outside of athletics and the inter team hook up culture that was going on within my team.

I for some reason, forgot what level of model I was in college as I was trying ti focus on school and athletics for the four years. But, the team culture still creeped me out. I guess that was just the modeling in me still holding me close to my morals, I’m thankful I did it this way.

A few months into the semester my phone was thrown onto the floor out of my locker by a teammate or a call vibrated it out of my locker. Being a student athlete, I couldn’t afford a new one at the time, so JJ Pursmey gave me his old phone. This girl, Kelley Vivas, had probably sent 100-300 Streams of naked images of her rolling around naked on a workout ball alone in her room, not even working out.

It was literally quote comical to see. When i firstly the images I was like, “hmm what are you doing there???” The positions she was in in order to show her coochie angle to the camera seemed so uncomfortable. Isn’t a workout ball for working out? Zhe woukd be making like angry faces in the images trying to be sexy. It was really just something as they say.

I had never seen another girls nudes at this point, I was shocked.

By winter break, I was able to throw the phone away. Luckily the girl was over 18 according to JJ at the time he gave me the phone. I threw it out anyways, and she wanted to be there doing that. I’m pretty sure that’s still how she makes “her living.” So I did what I can to not get involved with it.

I actually never revenge porned the girl even though she had me non consensually revenge porned for simple dating her ex, when I never even sent her nudes. I was just like, “Holy shit, this is EXTREMELY embarrassing for this girl Kelley. I’m just gonna not and get rid of the phone.”

But then, even though I didn’t revenge porn her after being handed her nudes in the age of revenge porn, she would still attack me. Now her and all of her local friends have protections set up by me where I can call police if they try to get near me at all. JJ Pursley as well.

Luckily the Texas DAS office let me look up all their information and submit it in for protections. Then, a stalking advocacy group took over this portion of my life for me. So I do feel safer, now.

Just knowing I can pick up my phone and have them arrested if they even get near me, is a ton of solace after this situation. I thought I was I’m a literal living hell after seeing this girl naked and how much she wanted to attack me into oblivion for simply dating someone.

I would make him go on walks with me. We would go to the movies with groups of people. We would eat. He would take me to stores or shopping centers driving wise. But this girl just would not stop. I have no clue where her psychology us at after being a porn cam girl, which is why I had to report her to police.

It wa super creepy and I was honestly afraid she was getting ready to seek me out. She would acreenshot my social images of me on spring break during the second semester of college and send send to him as if she was going to use them for something. And now her whole life is a revolving lawsuit luckily for me. I don’t don’t think she was loved to finish out her college degree.

She has no job listed online, and she still tries to attack my character. I’m unsure why, she sees how bad JJ Pursleys life has gotten, how does she not realize that she is next. I was tying to help her by not forwarding her nudes to anyone. But I guess she was mad because she likes being a porn star? That’s fine with me, but you can’t attack non-porn stars for not wanting to join you.

I’m not sure if this girl was a part of a wider network, but she’s about to be a Jeffrey Epstein cronie by age 24. If she’s not already, I felt so bad reporting her, but the advocacy group and DAS office gladly took the information from me. That was a HUGE step forward in feeling safety in my own life again as a model.

Personally, I did make a plan to jump from the roof of my dormitory dormitory the ground after this girl began attacking me. I DO NOT FEEL THIS WAY ANYMORE, AT ALL. I have gotten multiple rounds of therapy for what Kelley Vivas and Joseph James Pursley did in my life as I was trying to start art school, my whole dream after being born in projects as a kid.

Luckily, after receiving therapy and getting better, I still have my modeling career and my art career. And I don’t struggle to get jobs in fashion or art still. My contracts have actually begun protecting my personal images and creative content for me online after how many times both women and men began stalking me with bad intentions. THIS WAS A MASSIVE BLESSING IN MY LIFE.

So immediately then after the attacks began, I knew I was going to have to report the situation eventually to either my contracts or police. I happen to have such a huge modeling contract established when I was a child that my family has it protected by a bank. Some models do have their contracts protected, if they are large enough at a young age. My family personally doesn’t speak about the intricacies of my specific contract for how large it got so young. I’ve started telling people small parts of it so they will leave me alone, but the rest of my contract is in a bank vault at what brands were willing to offer me at such a young age for my good nature and ability to always try to do the right thing.

My family, after my childhood, is extremely proud of me for this and they remind me daily, weekly. And monthly of how proud of me they are for my work in modeling alone.

It got so huge so fast for me that I had to hide inside of my home after a while. Eventually, the world got safer for highly talented kids and now I just get my big drops at home.

I do really miss going to a set, but shooting from home helps keep me safe from the types of men that used to be kept around modeling sets or would sneak their way onto set.

I also began looking up free scientific mental health resources online so that I wouldn’t fold in on my own mental health while moding, and could laugh about situations such as these.

Any time I catch myself doing something out of character for me and my career. I get therapy, get online resources, get free hot lines. Then I move on.

Again, growing up within the modeling industry, I was ALWAYS told by my dad’s model friends and the Cincinatti Ballet that I DID NOT NEED OR HAVE TO DO PORN TO SURVIVE. They very much advised against it with me, and any guy who has ever tried or threatened me into it, has no life now financially. I cannot thank these people enough for their guidance.

In business, JJ Pursley with a degree, was offered offered $22k base salary and them promptly almost lost his sales job, because no one would buy from him.before finishing my degree, I was offered a 40k base salary after freelancing through college, for a role where I didn’t even have to make sales at the job.

Now, I’m getting modelng contracts and job offers galore now that I have my degree completed out after going through this while trying to finish a collegiate degree out. I cannot say thank you enough to the people who kept a pulse on the EXTREMELY DANGEROUS situation for a model of my level and helped to pull me out of it once I could break free.

I am extremely proud of myself for surviving this, this felt like one of the biggest tests of my life so far. It was an extreme every day stressor while I attempted to complete my college courses, and I wasnt even attacking anyone.

Now, I can only laugh about it. Now, that I know larger organizations are working on the issue. I feel immensely safer now that this new wave of police and legislative system know this story.

But then again, JJ Pursely himself, began being followed by police before the relationship was even over. He has now been removed from SEC athletic football games, and almost arrested on the streets, by police.

So back to the story. At the time, JJ was telling me how much he hated being this way and how much he was trying to not be a porn and drug/alcohol addict verbally. He would tell me that he wanted to kill himself over this girls attachment to sending him nudes. So, I tried to help him in early work ways as best as I could. No one deserves to die over this. But I still haven’t heard of JJ Pursley and Kelley Vivas being forced into rehab, and JJ almost gets arrested on the street.

Yes, porn is not illegal, but trying to force a model into it is. I couldn’t tell JJ how big of a model I was.

During the relationship he woukd se the quality if my contracts and start to wonder about what was going on. But, I kept it a secret from him because of the lorn addiction attached to him and how much he would beg me to do it for him.

Kelley Vivas on the other hand, was a dancer I guess. I’m learning from this situation and others, that a lot of ballet or those types of dancer dancers actually engage in full porn type shooting or sex work outside of their jobs. Let me make this clear, not pole dancing, full porn and sugar daddy’s type stuff. I feel bad that they have to do this to get paid, but get a second legal job if dance doesn’t pay enough.

That is exactly what I do. Sometimes I get 3-5 legal jobs or contract position to not do porn or sex work when I’m not modeling. I know tons of other dancers who work 3-5other jobs on top LEGAL dance as well. I’m only approached by ballerinas for prostitution, still. Ballerinas mostly, approach me in public and try to tell me sex work is okay.

I left Ballet to model when the outsiders beginning targeting me shit started because I didn’t like it. My modeling contract is now protected by a bank vault vault yall can’t get it.

The Cincinatti Ballet is the only Ballet I trust. The Cincinatti Ballet and my contracts. The women and men at Cincinatti Ballet and within my personal modeling contracts told me I NEVER needed to do porn. They would only side hug me and tell me how beautiful I was. They were not upset at me for leaving dance after what men tried to do to me because of it. I would still dance for this Ballet troop if I could even meet their standards for human beings.

The dancers from the Cincinatti Ballet would pull me to the side as a little girl and show me the dance hall asking me if I even knew how beautiful I was as a very very young girl. And they gave me the confidence to never need to do porn or give into Sugar Daddy culture. All because a Ballet troop showed me how much they cared about children NOT having to do that.

I cannot thank the Cincinatti Ballet enough for dropping in on my practices as a child or finding me at their shows and walking me through the hall making me feel poised and confident enough to rise above it.

So after I initially was beginning to date JJ Pursley and trying to hear him out about how he wanted to change as a human himself, I thought I would give him a chance to change. He didn’t. And that’s okay, I hope he gets mental health help.

Once Joseph James Pursley decided that I was a better option than his ex, he began trying to break up with her. I guess fearing that she would lose her already set Porn career, she woukd threaten to kill herself to him as he broke up with her. She would literally threaten to kill herself for her high school boyfriend breaking up with her.

So then eventually JJ Purey did enough work to get her in the back burner, and he actually started making an effort to get out of the home with me. He woukd take me to my car appointments to get my car serviced at the time. He woukd take me in fast food dates. He woukd teach me how to skateboard again outside, etc. Once we got his cam girl ex out of the picture, we actually started having a pretty wholesome time with others. Then the attacks began.

She would call him telling him that she was going to hang up and kill herself if he broke up with her on the phone call. JJ Pursley would be on the phone crying and asking her to not kill herself over their break up. This part was actually really sad.

JJ would start hanging up and telling me that he wanted to die or join the military, because of what Kelley Vivas, the cam girl, was making him go through.

And she still stalks him. This part if the story I actually feel bad for him.

I don’t feel bad for his addictions. That’s the part I don’t feel bad for him for.

Let me preface, I sometimes do put filters over my social media images, because technically my face is trademarked or protected under brands. So if someone were to catfish trying to be me, or use my face and body as intercultural property without ler.ission from my contracts, they woukd get sued. So, at that time I would filter my photos in order to avoid becoming the subject of someone’s catfish over another.

I’m sure this girl would say, “well I’d didn’t know it was like that,” now. But she shouldn’t have to know it’s like that to not be a psychopath.

She began messaging JJ Purey how ugly I was. Calling out my filters on my photos. Reminding him that they had child names picked out. Eventually, JJ showed me it all. He would tell me how delusional this woman was and how wrong she was when he told me.

But at least he made sure to let me know some psychopathic girl was about to drive in from Arizona.

She eventually began requesting that JJ Pursley shoot revenge porn of me for their high school hometown of Phoenix, Arizona. Because I woukd refuse to send JJ any nudes as his girlfriend. I was actually very adimate against sending them to him.

Then JJ Pursley made the conscious decision to film me during a compromising moment via the app Snapchat, which is apparently trackable. I know my blog is being followed by my brands only now. So I do feel safer, now.

This girl just would not stop. We were dating 3 years later and age woukd still try to reach out to him. Luckily, I was able to follow and screenshot her and her friends socials until they got found out in order to protect myself.

These girls even sent their friend to stalk me on campus at my own university and laugh in my face… they stalked and abused a blind girl via social media.

Eventually, after these women got found out, they were forced to join community service organizations.

I have no clue if the girl, Kelley Vivas, was even allowed to finish out her collegiate degree via The University of Arizona, however she was supposed to be a medical professional. And she eas threatening suicide to a man over a break up when they didn’t even live in the same state anymore.

So my best advice if you are in a situation like this and scared to get out of it, fearing death, tell police. Tell therapists, tell your parents, tell your friends.

Tell anyone you can about how you tried to get away. Work hard or seemingly difficult busimess type or learning jobs to try to take over your mind.

It gets extremely stressful and downright CREEPY in your life if you let people do this to you or approach you with these intentions. I quit my sport and my dream major, left and separated myself and pretended it wasn’t happening unless to defend myself.

I was super lucky that my next major was also a dream to me and made my mind actually feel good again. But I did research it super hard before transferring into it, so I knew it would be that way. I am still EXTEEMELY THANKFUL for my school in letting me do this and then eveb reach out when my boyfriend became extremely abusive to me again tonhelo get me into therapy.

As women, this is all we can do, in my own opinion. When it comes to modeling at the level that I do, I choose to forget about it completely from the creepy people who try to know me after my modeling career hits again. Luckily, by starting to tell people when I weirded out or scared of the people who even try to follow me, I get better protection to do my job.

Thank you for stopping by!

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Published July 6, 2021

Categorized as About Me, Social Justice IssuesTagged real life relationship abuse, stalking

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[shydaydreamer28]

Deadpool -Pansexuality

I started not to post, since topics of sexuality, politics, race, and religion are VERY controversial. But I wanted to share my opinion on this. Anytime this aspect of Deadpool’s character is brought up, you have people argue that he’s not pansexual because we have never seen him kiss or sex-up another dude on-screen.

So, I wanna counter that, and explain why I don’t think it proves he’s not pansexual. There’s no deep philosophical reason. It’s really a pretty simple one -despite the post-length. lol And it’s still in theory territory -because obviously, I don’t know everything. lol.

The Reason -Writers Pander to their Demographic. If they’re straight, white, males -then expect most of their work to show things that those types of viewers would wanna see.

Official Deadpool writers credit him as non-straight. Fabian Nicieza says his sexuality simply depends on his brain at the moment, because his mental state is in constant flux. He likes whatever his brain tells him he likes in that instant. Gerry Duggan, writer for current Deadpool solo series, classifies him as pansexual and “ready & willing to do anything with a pulse.” His exact quote. Then he states keeping up to date on Deadpool’s “omnisexual exploits.”

So these things coming from 2 different Deadpool writers seems to point to the fact that he’s not 100% straight. And, just because a person is pan or bi doesn’t mean they can’t have a gender preference. Some men could be bi or pan, but prefer women. Or prefer men. Or prefer one gender in general, but have specific types in others.

It’s canon that Deadpool’s feelings toward Spider-Man aren’t 100% platonic.

While married, Deadpool had a top 5 free-pass list of people he could sleep with. Spider-Man was #5 on his list.

He wasn’t doing it to be funny, or annoying, because he didn’t intend for Spider-Man to know. When Peter asks who #5 is, Wade tells him never-mind.

We see Peter asking about the list again here.

What happened? Wade outright lied about him being on it. So again, he wasn’t carrying around a free-pass list with Spider-Man on it just to show him for a punch-line. And it wasn’t a joke to make Spider-Man uncomfortable, because he lied when asked about it. 

Then there’s the final chapter. Now THIS is debatable, When Spider hugs Pool, looking at his face -the almost embarrassed grin, and given his line, it’s very possible he’s got a bit “too excited” here.

Then there’s the variant covers depicting him trying to kiss Spider-Man

Now these 2 are only friends. I don’t argue that. We’re not gonna see them dating, kissing, or having sex. But, that’s because Spider-Man is straight, doesn’t mean Deadpool is. lol

This series (Spider-Man/Deadpool) was written by Joel Kelly. Another of Deadpool’s big writers. 

Some doubt Deadpool likes men because we never actually see Deadpool hooking up with other dudes on-screen. So they think his flirting is just casual jokes not to be taken seriously. But you have to consider who the writers are. The writers are most-likely white straight men after all. Lets look at the women Deadpool’s been paired or teased with.

Just pix of the main ones, but they’re all hot white women

Anyway, women we haven’t seen Deadpool with include -Black, Asian, and Average-looking. Just another example of preference, and going more with your demographic. Like if you have mostly black writers, and a black director, then it’ll be the same thing. A black lead, and black love interests. Just the way media is most of the time.

Now, let me bring up RoguePool as another example of pandering bias.

When Rogue kissed him, she ended up having the same crap he did, but was still hot.

They didn’t make her as ugly as Deadpool can be portrayed as

No hair. A nose that seems to have slumped, and grown on to his lip almost, and yellow eyes, with no, or hardly visible, pupils,and WAAAY worse skin.

Why? Again, male viewers wanna see hot women. So, ya gotta have Rogue still be hot. Guys  don’t wanna see a deformed Rogue.

But, nobody cares if the dude is ugly. Look at all the shows or films where hot women were paired with dumpy, if not ugly, male leads. You RARELY see the reverse.

Again for the het male readers, they wanna see hot women and the male leads getting it with hot women. Thus, that’s gonna be the bulk of love interests for any male lead, no matter how ugly he may be.

Going on the writers’ confirmation of DP’s sexuality, but no dude+dude. Sometimes writers or creators will tell you things outright, but will not show it on-screen. To avoid controversy, damaging sales, or the complete awkwardness of writing / filming it. Look at other media. You see lesbians depicted quicker than gay men.

Look at Deadpools ex, Shiklah. She was shown in bed with other female monsters on more than one occasion. Here, we see one running from her room.

Guys don’t mind seeing or hearing about lesbians, so that’s cool for male writers and directors to get into. But if the male viewers have to see guys who like other guys, they need to be very funny about it -thus sometimes extremely stereotyped, and physical stuff is kept to a low minimum, if not completely off-screen.

“Modesty / Subtlety”

When it comes to same-sex relations with men in media -most of the time, we seem to be in the phase where all sex was in earlier days of media. Lucy and Ricky slept in twin beds -as did all tv couples at the time. They clearly had sex. And Ricky jr. wasn’t planned since Lucy didn't even think she'd be pregnant, and was shocked to find out. But for modesty, you never see them do anything other than have chaste peck-kisses. Then eventually far as media goes, sex was only ever implied. You’d see characters kiss, then a fade to black with them both very happy in the morning while doing other things.

Same-sex among men seems to be here. You’ll see flirting and hear comments / references. But you never see them have on-screen kissing or sex scenes. We haven’t quite progressed to that yet, least not to my knowledge. In terms of seeing it in comics, or anything in Hollywood. Reynolds has said he wants Deadpool to have a boyfriend in the live-action films. We’ll see how far that gets to coming to fruition.

Legend of Korra is famous for this. At the series’ end, Korra + Asami get together. There were little things throughout season 4 that hinted at their feelings. But many thought nothing of them because they weren’t overt enough.  Finally, we have the following screenshot.

Again, many argued this meant nothing because nothing happened -like a kiss. Again, it’s already progress to show same-sex relations, on Nick. But they showed it with women -not men. And even then, it was met with argument from fans who thought it had no build-up, and even some fans who thought the above screenshot was platonic. 

The show creators however did confirm that the 2 are a couple, and that Asami is Korra’s heart. But are we gonna say that it isn’t serious, or doesn’t count because we didn’t see them kiss? This ending was romantic in nature, and the creators confirmed it after there was still debate. 

They were VERY subtle about what they showed with these two, which didn’t make it non-existent. Unlike the straight couple Zaheer and P’Li who are shown kissing 5 sec. after they see each other.

Conclusion

Despite the length, at the end of the day, Deadpool will probably not be shown kissing or sexing men ON-SCREEN. But that doesn’t mean his interest in men is non-existent. 

He flirts with guys the same way he does with women. The difference isn’t what Deadpool does. It’s who responds. Any men he flirts with are never interested in him It’s the women who have higher chances of finding him charming or funny, and falling for him. Deadpool is pan, but could largely prefer women. You can be bi or pan and still have a preference.

Chasing Amy is a good example, a decent 90s film. The female lead, Alyssa experimented with guys as a teen. After college, she exclusively dated women for the next 10 years, and identified as a lesbian. She fell in love with Holden-stating that he was the first to ever truly sate her. After they broke up, she went back to dating women. Clearly, she prefers women. But that doesn’t mean a man, or the right man, is off the table. So she’s not a complete lesbian.

Editor, Jordan D. White is active on this site. He received an Ask saying that it’s annoying how many think Deadpool is straight. So, he asks if he’d consider giving Deadpool a boyfriend in canon. 

Here’s the post.

https://jordandwhiteqna.tumblr.com/post/107753982210/as-someone-who-has-to-deal-with-fake-geek-boys-who

So, no words put in his mouth. He doesn’t deny that Deadpool isn’t straight. And he’s open to the idea of a male love interest. But something more goes on behind the scenes that he can’t call that shot just like that. 

[popcartoonkabala]

Trinities, dualities, retirements and euphemisms: division into clarity (Chesed-Gevurah-Tipheret she b Malchut)               PART I! [Superman is not Batman]

Phillip K. Dick z”l likes Kabbalah, as a tool for making sense of the mad world around him through a kind of schizophrenic observation of patterns around him to testify a larger message. The greatest and most perfect vessel for this, as testified in the Gnostic tradition, is trash culture, pop garbage i.e. the only place where divinity is expressible, where the evil demi-urge isn't looking to stop the holy serpent from emerging with original light. In order for there to be a world at all, the world has to be ruled by the unfair, ugly, and chaotically inconsistent. Not like heaven at all, right? Almost by definition, by Platonic or Aristotelian standards. But where does cosmic order emerge? Only at the margins, only at the fringes, and, ironically, there at the center stage too. 

That's commercial fiction and idolatry for you: at the center stage, selling for all the most cynical and manipulative purposes, through a penetrating insight and resonant rightness bound to all the trouble, which of itself reflects the larger pattern ultimately. Nature of stories, and this is why the different degrees of meaning that can be understood from a story go so far, from the very literal, to the allegorical, to the practical to the sublime. And so, the patterns manifest themselves beyond the wills of the ostensible authors of the stories, and hide themselves from the more over philosophers and theologians. Because the heart of the most crass and cynical yearns to speak truth the most completely, he will testify, like the reactionary with the profoundly naked insights.

Who's a cheaper whore than Superman? Maybe the word “cheap” is inappropriate, but maybe not. American/Roman Pop morality is naught but infinitely flexible and adaptable to new concerns and insistences; always ready and curious to be impressed. This is universal religion, “Catholic”. This is the aspect of Jesus on the cross, god manifest through his degradation, into and for the sake of, accessibility. Superman becomes whatever he is needed to be-- whatever powers whatever vulnerability, whatever issue, whatever justification we need for doing something or nothing at all, superman will stand for it. If not the Warner official version, then surely some instant satiric analogue. 

There was a great legal case once over the Adventures of Captain Marvel: a visual and capable rip-off of superman, with a twist of course, seeing as he was a kid who could turn into the superman at will, and existed through magic. The lawsuit came and went, and in the end, DC comics and Warner just went out and bought the rights to Captain Marvel, realizing that it was the best they could do to get a handle on a hero successful enough to be identified as distinct, with a narrative and identity suddenly irrepressible. All super-heroes are twists on the superman model, it turns out, and even he is a twist on something older, almost infinitely and unknowably older.  Generational waves of sub-character tend to be expressions of the original character into another era, I.e the Dick Grayson into Batman, or better yet, the evolution of the Blue Beetles from classic old school adventurer into whatever a Blue Beetle must become. Aspects reincarnate into the next necessary amendment of the original character, which occasionally (but rarely) effectively supplants the original character, as in the case of the silver age DC heroes like Flash or Green Lantern.  If only there was some guide to identifying the pattern that made a change resonant, helpful, or necessary; there is a long history of embarrassing attempts at revamping, gropes for relevance ending as repulsive and unwanted as desperate, blind insensitive groping tends to.

One of the most important of the Kabbalistic traditional practices has been the hope of charting the exact moment where good becomes bad, the exact moment when the shark is jumped, in the hopes of seeing the face of the divine in that interchange, in that second where something goes from either problematic to helpful, or from helpful to problematic. Helpful to problematic is easier to gauge because it's relatively easy to watch something “good” and appreciated go on, while abuses and crimes turned heroic tend to be more spontaneous, but the story of both or either are precisely the story of how and when G-d creates the universe, and splits the read sea.

There is a certain kind of apocalypse inherent to the cartoon narrative: i.e. The day the Golem went mad. Superman and Jean Grey are the most helpful of heroes, and every integral problem solver MUST GO BAD-- ULTIMATELY! This is inherent to any narrative that goes on forever, the day the hero either got mind controlled, justifiably corrupted, or just crushed by tragedy-- and became more of a problem than a help. In the biblical book of Lamentations, one of the most striking moments is when the G-d who often defined helpful friendliness throughout much of the bible, has suddenly become “Like an enemy, his bloodlust insatiable.” This is an inevitable moment with especially the most likeable and powerful of super-helpers, and this end is certainly the profound apocalypse most feared, who's fulfillment is the end of the heroic purity myth.

Superman ends like this a million times: the very first superman sequel, and the very ultimate Batman story (DKR), the last two episodes of the Superman cartoon, and the whole second season of the Justice League Unlimited, feature this nightmare tension, of a superman entirely corrupt, either sensibly (as is the case of the cynical political superman of Red Son, Justice League episode “Justice Lords” the Reagan lackey of Dark Knight Returns, and the marvel analogue Hyperion in the orginial Squadron Supreme) or from corruption or madness (like under Darkseid's control, or that of Red Kryptonite, or just frustration and natural alienation from humanity, like in Mark Waid's brilliant extended series Irredeemable, or John Arcudi and Peter Snejbjerg's sublime meditation on power and humanity A God Somewhere.) Alan Moore's Marvelman/Miracleman split the difference by having the maddened Kid Miracleman be the horror apocalypse, and then fighting the enlightened mature Miracleman, who defeats him and becomes the art messiah who fixes the whole world at last, just like we'd like superman to in our most ideal of fantasies.

In Gath Ennis's affectionate take on the problem, as well as the ones of other ostensibly cynical voices like Grant Morrison, Mark Millar and Jack Kirby: Superman's only able to do so much, and is strikingly tolerant and welcoming of criticism and alternative support. Many writers prefer the earnest and noble invincible hero to the crafty and cynical plotter, hence greater cynicism about Batman or Iron man gone awry than for Superman or Silver Surfer, those so powerful who haven't ALREADY become monsters might be trusted never to do so, or at least, not for long, and not without being sorry.

Even Ennis's twist on Superman in The Boys isn't as vicious as he initially appears, at least not because  of his own selfish obliviousness, one that generally seems even more noble than that of every other corrupt hero around.  But part of Ennis's art is humanizing and contextualize the most dangerous of  monster-people, the war criminals and punishers alike, even as he refuses to take away from the horror of what people do, all the time. But these are the three extremes that define the end of Superman: Benevolent divinity vs. Malevolent divinity vs. Death/alienated immortality. His death can only be tragic and heroic, but how much is his virtue lost in through his power? Superman is defined as the guy who becomes as awesome as a situation demands, in all and any ways-- that is infinitely helpful or infinitely dangerous or just only possible for finite time.

But what Sephira is Superman?

Lets say there were ten sephirot, or even lets say there's just seven: one of the biggest issues in Kabbalistic accounting and equalization is where does One stand relative to Two? Does Three come after Two, or does Four? We might want to just assume that One is before Two, but it's not always clear that Three is before Four, because the rumor is that Three and Four are created simultaneously, in much the same way that One and Zero are. Let me say it better: Superman is obviously a certain kind of hero number One.

But is Hero #1 Chesed or Tipheret?

Let me explain what I mean: Everybody knows...

...Chesed Is Original Kindness, infinite utterly and unitive, the                       right arm. Gevurah Is Original Restraint, infinite utterly and divisive, judgemental, the left arm.  And Tipheret Is the Original Harmony, perfect         in it's balance between Kindness and Restraint, relating infinitely, the central trunk of the tree, aka “Truth” and “Mercy.”

The First is identified often/sometimes with Jupiter, especially in Hellenistic models. This is fair if/when he rules the Heavens and makes rightness (צדק) between the other highest forces. Enthusiastic, appreciated but too comfortable to be too respected: so is a certain cosmic ruler and standard. The middle pillar, on the other hand, generally ultimately identified with the Sun, which confounds the order of days of the week, implying that Sunday is not the natural first day of the week, but rather should be the Third!  But this is not how the ancient Romans calculated. Our modern international sequence comes from, as described in Ptolemy's Almagest and the Talmudic Shabbos BT (100-102), emerges from observation of which star was most visible in the first hour of each given evening. Is that arbitrary? Or full of meaning?

---

There's a parallel from the iconic super team of Marvel to that of D.C.-- While the Fantastic Four was commissioned to exploit the popularity of the Justice League of America, the Avengers were the authentic doppelgangers-- in different aspects, certainly, but with certain fundamental similarities inherent to the iconic pantheistic model. Once one is collating the assorted gods of all regions into a proper pantheon, one starts to notice syncreticsms and synchronicities. Both teams, maybe the Avengers more so, just because they had less overt precedent than the Justice League, grew and grow through a process of throwing more and more shit on the wall to see what sticks. There have been incarnations of both teams with an absolute minimum of iconic team players, and those experiments honestly tend to be much less successful, because who cares about peripheral characters? Who wants to identify with, or feel safe because of, the peripheral?  Even heroes of the periphery like Spider-man stop being peripheral as soon as they emerge into action mode, and suddenly become the most visible and important people in the room. Same with spy heroes like the Black Widow or The Vision or Bronze Tiger or The Huntress or any of them: their value in the team dynamic only comes from the moment where they too become central to the narrative.

If Aquaman can't maintain his functional centrality, he's not gonna be on the A-team for long-- unless the whole concept becomes boring, and some urgent manic experiment offers to make him fundamentally central, as in the case of Justice League Detroit, or Martian Manhunter's JLTask Force.  From this process emerges the true iconic figures, hero or villain: Divinities are defined by their never-endingness. That's why the days of the week are named after, and associated with, gods: because they keep on coming, forever. The mystery of identifying patterns in that infinitude are the beginning of all wisdom.

The heroes, like gods are defined by their values and priorities. The gangster extreme of self-indulgence, the scientist extreme of blind unapologetic exploration-- to be resonant, they just need to be inspiring-- but to be national myths, they must be tempered with moral limitations pleasing and comforting to the controllers of the mediums expressed through.

One of the first great American pop heroes of the 20th century, avatar of the electrical media of radio and television, and precursor to the  model of secret identity bonded to uncompromising moral code is of course, the Lone Ranger. Composed very intentionally as a moral alternative to the traditional savage, cynical and self-interested Western hero-model, much of the strange-but-endearing commitment to Certain Social Principles of profound civic idealism, which in the Lone Ranger's case includes subtleties as square as a refusal to use any slang or pidgin english, but also as inherent to mainstream cartoon heroes as the commitment to avoid killing any villain whenever possible, despite actually carrying a sacramental pistol, packed with specifically silver bullets, a metal with very noble alchemical associationsi. This shifting of the wild, independent loner into the trustworthy hero depends on his commitment to these social principles, much as the biblical Samson and David are able to be pious warriors, once they've committed themselves to mosaic law, and made clear that there is a charming and co-identifiable limit to their violence that will not degrade into the most disruptive of role models.

Through this kind of covenantal circumcision of the heart, the modern hero is able to be trusted by even his enemies within the conservative mainstream, otherwise afeared of the wildness of the West inverting into the romantic lawless relative amorality that becomes the gangster, once the expanse of the West gives way to the cramped urban jungle of the Cities that become America. This is observed strongly in the relationship between Spider-man and J Jonah Jameson, as opposed to Superman and Batman who are ultimately more than tacitly encouraged and appreciated by their local constabulary and media, who know that these heroes are only here to help and would never do certain terrible things, any terrible things, by definition and nature.  This may be because spider-man is an avatar of instability, stepping between margins that a bat, super or wonder person would gracefully step over and avoid the weakness and vulnerability of. The spider-tipheret-middle pillar walker will be elaborated, but first, I just want to clarify:

In Thirty Two Paths of “Awesome Science”!

Jah                                                                         Deus

The Lord of Hosts                                             ��       Odin

Living god                                                                 Thor

El Shaddai                                                                Freya

High and Guiding                                                       Sun

Staying until (forever) and Sacred his name             Moon

Superior and Holy he                                               Saturn/Loki

Created his Universe in three spheres

1) In Digit, ספר

2) Media, ספר

3) and Narrative סיפור

10 spheirot ספירות(“cyphers”) “without-what?”

And 22 signature-marks אותיות (“letters”)

3 mothers אמהות and

7 doubles כפולותand

12 simples פשותות

                                                                      Sepher Yetzirah (1:1)

I'm saying!

3 mothers = The Trinity, a term openly used in DC cosmolopgy to mean

Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman

the foundation and inherent electoral board of the Justice League,

without these three IN SOME FORM OR ANOTHER there is no democratic team dynamic

The Marvel Trinity is obviously

Captain America, Thor, and Iron-man

and

Captain America is NOT a founding member! But the team did not glue until he was aboard, and this is the secret of Tipheret/Harmony coming down from Daat/knowledge-- Captain America joins the team to guide it and ground it:

Man out of time? Not far out of time, he is the only ancient Marvel Hero to join the team from recent modernity-- Thor is an ancient hero, but not originative in the medium-- he's notably absent from the Golden age except as a villain (in Kirby and Simon's Sandman reboot)! Unlike Samson or Hercules, ancient heroes inoffensive in their relative moral grounding with relationship to democracy. As opposed to Germanic Thor, only identifiable then with the “cursed Hun” and his nihilistic confidence.

But by the sixties, comics enter The Silver age, and any alchemist who knows knows that Silver is so much more divine and resonant than Gold. By then, the redeemed Captain could descend, specifically from the moment in history that created the pop-superhero, the World War 2. All three foundational Justice Leaguers come from Golden Age to Silver, intact as opposed to their mostly rebooted comrades like Green Lantern, Hawkman/Hawkgirl and Flash. Not so with the Avengers: only one of the marvel heroes returns from recent antiquity, That war-- but is he Chesed or Tipheret?

Michael, identified with Chesed is a war god, master of legions, but in the context of the Avengers, Cap is the balancier,  not the childish infinite power that Marvel's Thor, or the Powerpuff girls's Bubbles, represent.

On the other hand, the shield is identified with Abraham, not Jacob, and Thor is more the Eternal Son, killed and resurrected, and humbled by the sublimation of his divinity into human form so that he might change his essential nature and gain new sensitivities; This Is the aspect of “Israel”: similar to Jacob, Joseph, and Jesus, except more into hitting than getting hit, dying only in order to win better. Compare with heroes on the level of King Saul and Solomon alike, who must be defeated in order for the love they represent and embody to be expressed.

3 becomes 7 by doubling, and then the axis that both are on is the 7th.  This is Shabtai/Saturn/Shiva: conceptualized ultimately as Time itself (Cronos/Shabbat) this star is what binds the week and initiates creation, by being willing to be, and satanically shuts down time, as soon as he doesn't care anymore.  Identified with the god of Israel by the Romans, Saturn is identified with and synchretized with Dionysus(Liber) in his exctatic/nihilistic aspect (the Attic/Anatolian/Ancient-Eastern “Sabezius”). This same Saturn initiates law and civilization, all by being the axis that the other Celestials revolve around, which all the rest do in their way, at their point. They all imitate their absented-defeated father, as is the way. Shabatai/Saturn/Shiva encompasses all and implies the rest-- if you have Shiva, then you have had Brahma and all the rest at once. Cronos/Saturn similarly devours all his children, not destroying them, but just encompassing them, in the hopes of keeping All One and All Whole and All Self until Jupiter/Guru/Tzadek cuts him open, making space for story, peace and generations. Mothers, Doubles, Etc.

But

Every version of the Sepher Yetzira i've seen has a different sequence for the correspondences between the seven planets and the associated days of the week. Why?  

I asked a rabbi who had published my favorite version of the Sepher Yetzira, tidily framed like a poetry book, like a modern translation of the Dao De Ching, one simple quatrain per page. His version, as with a predominant majority of the extant Hebrew versions of the Sefer Yetzirah in circulation, has the planets and days in an order contrary to the Julian order that seems to be almost universally popular in the world. You know the order i'm talking about, right? Sun, Moon, Mars, Mercury, Jupiter, Venus and then Saturn. The order of the days in Norse, Vedic, and Greco-Roman tradition. Ostensibly based on emergence of the celestial body during the first hour of a given day, it's really popular... and yet almost no version of The Sefer Yetzira, which lists those same 7 deities along with the seven days of the week, helpfully numbered (The first day, second day etc) has them in a order like Sun on the first day Moon on the second, etc. Why not?

I found him at a wedding, Avraham Leader, and I asked him. He looked off into the sky, closed his eyes, and testified: “they're changing all the time, rotating.” There's something honest and authentic in that very witty deconstruction-- the pattern is observed, 3 mothers and 7 doubles, but which is which shifts, as is the nature of dynamic relationships. Maybe there's some pattern to how, i'm sure some number of people have tried to chart it, always, from all angles. And maybe that's one of the blessings of pop-cartoon media: the constant unfolding of the stone, and the chance to watch the same divinities engage each other in different permutations according to the new clarity of each new day. New comics come out on Woden's day, but they are printed on Moon day and shipped on Tyr's.

But all that would change as the technologies and conveniences do, because no tradition is more stable than the context that nurses it. Subsequently:

There's a problem in identifying which day of the week is which Sephira

Lets say there are three intial “mothers” as the sepher yetzira insists. One forms the other, and then a balance is found it between it's two infinite extremes that is the third that defines the polarity forever, it's harmony and balanced aspect.

For example-- heat, when created, immediately exists in the context of cold, and right there, are the two mothers חום/heat and קוּר/cold, and the balance that forms between them is the harmony that becomes known as רויה/temper(ature), and time is defined by these extremes.

This pattern is also itself triplicate in the Sepher Yetzirah, the above triumvirate reflecting Time, another triumvirate reflecting Space and a third personifying Psyche, a.k.a. Soul, a.k.a. Feeling.

The absurdity of these narratives is that the third, the harmonizer, in all case must actually be the first, in some conceptual sense, and tends to actually be listed first in most versions, despite being defined only by its relationship to balancing the other two infinities.  This is expressed by the three letters through which the idea of the Three Mothers is first elaborated: מ (“Mem” )initiates, ש (Shin) stops and א (Aleph) balances. The joke is: א is the original letter, the first, identified with the moment before creation. The aleph is the original alpha, yet here it comes only to balance the conflict between an initial oM and a silencing Sh-- as if to say that, although it's initial conception predates all existence, it only comes into functional existence in the context of the schism that the world itself is made of. The schism between before and after that creates history, the schism between close and far that invents space, and the schism between gut and head that facilitates experience-- they are all founded in the tacit and unexpressed primordial distinction between being, unbeing, and the liminal space inbetween that actually, naturally, predates the distinction.

This space is not to be identified with God, who is still defined as implicit in, and beyond, this whole game and process. But if one would identify it with a degree of God, it would be the degree yearned for and sought by the gnostics who insisted that all else of power and presence in the world of lies was only extant to repress that pure initial light. That's the prize for everyone and anyone trying to get beyond the distinction and the world, but the whole and true G-d is only encounterable in the whole entirety, being and non-being and the bridge all together at once with everything AND nothing.

All the stories are about the invasion of these patterns into each other, and the hilarity, terror and novelty that ensue. But they are just decorations so that we have some impression of the invisible Queen, who cannot be known except by the veils she wears, which ironically free her to be as public as she would be.  The veils have patterns because the shape of the face has patterns: Most of Kabbalistic meditation is looking at a thing and then it's opposite, and then at once glancing at what they have in common, through which they are bound and ground.

The first creates the second. The second splits into both third and fourth at once. But one and two have an eternity together. An eternity to work out as much as is interesting or meaningful in their interaction. Any two characters on a given situation comedy are inevitably going to have time to do everything there is with each other than can be milked for humor and/or pathos. One and two live together, depend on each other, especially veiled as 0 and 1. Notice how the Latin word for god parallels the number two “Deux” rather than the number one “Uno,” identified with the moment before creation. No wonder the ancient west had no concept of “Zero”: they just called it “One” instead, with Two being the triumphant god “Tiwaz” vs. One/”Wotan, (Three/Thor, Four/Freya, etc.) Pop-culture, especially of a sort geared toward children, has trouble acknowledging post-romantic sexual dynamics, limiting the possibility of super-hero couples as being viable outside of a larger team dynamic.  This is one of the tremendous distinctions between normative pagan hierarchy and that of both Kabbalah and Pop-Cartoons: the ability to acknowledge a divine couple that is male and female equally. A great recent example is the Sym-bionic Titan, G. Tartatovsky's ambitious, epic and rightly awesome  but short lived follow up to Samurai Jack. Princess and Protector and Awesome Robot supervisor vs. Evil alien empire and G. I. Joe in the form of armored Transformers, that can bond into a full mini Voltron.  Here, the problem is adressed by defining the roles distinctly, mythically, and idealistically-platonically. He is there to protect her, She needs not protecting but wants to help Everyone, and Awesome Robot is the Knowledge resource that helps them bridge their gaps of priority and inherent personal distance, without need for ultimate compromise of personal identity.  So sometimes a way is found, to relate to the masculine and feminine in a dynamic in its entirety, but this rarely happens. It's hard on pop cartoons, made for kids assumed to be in relatively homo-genderous stages of developmental priority, not to just decide to pander to Boy Fantasy of infinite play-war, or Girl Fantasy of infinite play-drama.    

In Pop culture sitcomedy, it's easy: the tension between a central couple is the source of all tension and humor, and generally there's at least one secondary Dyad (Fred and Ethyl Mertz, for classic example) to take the pressure off the starring couple, to split with them into sub-teams, and then come back together in the comic denouement, often in paroxysms of laughter and celebration at an episodes end.  Something similar plays out in the ancient story of Dumuzi and Innana, where Dumuzi's sister-twin comes out of nowhere to play a central role once her bro has been dispatched to Hades for his insensitivity. His twin sister represents his interests, from a feminine perspective, to his feminine counterpart, who lives as a lover-foil, rather than as an empty gender-switched reflection. I believe this is the secret of the difference between an opposite and a contrapositive or an inversion, depending on which direction the wheel of priority turns.

In both the Hebrew Bible and the Pop Comic Book, power couples do emerge, and the stronger dualistic framework is that of the Hero/Villain dyad, where the tension is infinite, and the room for betrayal just as much.  Romance is expressed mostly through this format, with “partners” existing in a sibling limbo of proffessional-sacred uneroticism.  Notice how much silver-age Lois Lane ultimately functions as something more like an enemy than a partner, disrupting in the hopes of courting, Superman's tantric greatness being his ability to maintain integrity and grace while still dodging the compromise that Lois is constantly trying to insist. Superman and Batman don't have to be lovers to be PARTNERS, neither do Jonathan and David. But they ARE lovers, as mythicly bonded as Dumuzi and Innana-- and maybe even more securely.

In the great future, they have a fight to the death, says one vision of the end of the Batman/Superman team. One goes awry (or appears to) and the other must stop him. The only constant hope of salvation that the team/coupling has in this model is to be interrupted by a greater villain, watching, clapping, laughing, or invading, who they are then united against. This is the great model of ALL super-hero encounters in the original Marvel way, to the point where an immediate camraderie and spirit of co-operation becomes suspect, ominous, and due to inevitably collapse, because of mind -control or some other subversion.

Because the characters are MADE to ENGAGE each other, generally with violence, because this is a visual medium. Whereas Sherlock Holmes and Moriarty only came to fisticuffs once, and even then, not in a manner choreographed through words, but instead described almost passingly, and with more attention to detail given to the environment that they were to have their final encounter in, rather than lovingly detailed Biffs! And Pows! Because analog literature prized the narrative and insight form of conflict much more than what Warren Ellis calls the Explodo! Model, of action prized far over lush description.

[mewchonne]

Color Meme: TONS of Comic Michonne Headcanons

REALLY long, lots of information about my Michonne headcanons. I just filled out the entire meme since there was no one sending me asks and I do wha’ I want.

Some are left blank because I’m still thinking. May edit later. XD

frost blue: does your muse enjoy the snow and cold? or are they the type to enjoy summer more?

Michonne enjoys warm weather because it’s easier to go out and do things without having to bundle up. Plus summer outfits are adorable. She wears a lot of skirts.

peacock blue: is your muse honest? what sorts of lies do they tell, if not?

When she wants to be honest, she’s 100% blunt. Sometimes, due to her schizophrenia and PTSD, she doesn’t remember things that she said or did. She also completely denies it when she is aware she’s talking to herself, so I would say she is somewhat dishonest about her mental health to most people.

lapis lazuli: does your muse prefer the idea of exploring the depths of the oceans, or the boundless expanses of space more?

I think with all the time she’s spent at sea, she’d rather be in outer space. (Or, she finds the concept more appealing.)

reddish brass: how likely is your muse to step up and take the role of a leader? are they willing to take the challenge, or are they more apt to being a follower?

She is definitely more apt to be a follower, but not a blind one. If anything seems off and she can’t trust the person in charge, she will be the first to either say something or get the hell out of there.  (Sometimes she says something and gets herself into worse trouble, in fact, that’s happened before with a certain Governor we know.)

burnt umber: how stable is your muse, mentally and/or emotionally?

Not very. She’s evened out over the course of the storyline, but she still feels she’s completely unsuited as a romantic partner. She is just working on being a better friend, as sometimes she disappears on people, literally and figuratively.

champagne: does your muse drink (alcohol)? are they a heavy drinker, if so?

Not heavily. She can enjoy a drink or two here and there, but she likes to keep her mind sharp most of the time.

tea orange: what is something that your muse is fascinated with?

********

malachite: has your muse ever done anything that they winded up feeling incredibly guilty for in the end?

Absolutely. She is VERY impulsive. She can instantly name three: 1. Torturing the Governor but not killing him, 2. Stealing Tyreese from Carol which ultimately led to her suicide, 3. Leaving Ezekiel because of her own troubles.

olive: is your muse prone to feeling envious of others? if yes, what is it that they typically feel envious over?

VERY much so. She tends to be very envious of any woman who has a man she’s attracted to, or feels entitled to because they get along well. On the other hand, she is

vermillion: is your muse courageous, or would they consider themselves to be more of a coward?

Courageous with risking her life in physical altercations. VERY courageous/outgoing sexually. A complete coward when it comes to love… but not immune to it by any means.

coral: what is your muse's romantic and sexual orientations?

Bisexual/biromantic, prefers black men overall but could potentially love/fuck any type of person when it comes down to it. DEFINITELY notices attractive women, sometimes gets jealous, sometimes gets aroused. Usually both.

Also, often. Her sexual orientation is…often. LOL

bougainvillaea: would your muse consider themselves as blunt, or do they beat around the bush instead?

She is extremely blunt. If she’s going to say something, she either says it, or outright denies it / lies. (And she’ll probably admit she was lying later.)

currant: what's something that absolutely disgusts your muse (can be a person, place, thing, ect)?

Men who feel entitled to a woman’s body or think women should be seen and not heard. No faster way to get a fucking smack. (Or your ear bitten off…depends on the situation.)

crimson: how passionate is your muse about the things they love most?

Michonne is complex in this regard. When she feels passionately toward a person or thing, she can sometimes try to suppress it for fear of hurting herself. She does tend to be impulsive and have short bursts of passion that are very intense.

raspberry: what food and/or drink can your muse not get enough of? do they indulge in it often, or is it something reserved for special occasions?

*****

baby blossoms: does your muse have a favorite scent? what is it, and why?

*****

mallow: what sorts of things might remind your muse of those close to them? any scents, objects, sounds?

*******

aubergine: does your muse prefer the day, or are they more of a night-owl?

She absolutely loathes mornings. She relies heavily on caffeine. At night, she often can’t sleep and wanders. I’d say a night-owl.

acacia: how much does it take for your muse to hate someone?

******

cadmium yellow: what subjects or topics does your muse avoid, because they bring up harmful / painful memories?

She actually talks about anything someone asks her about. If the wound is fresh, she brushes them off, but aside from that she is extremely open, she just doesn’t volunteer upsetting information often unless asked.

honey: when your muse loves someone (whether it be romantic, platonic, or familial love), how do they show it?

When it comes to romantic love, she is ALL about the sex. She avoids discussing feelings sometimes so that she can just have sex instead.

Additionally, she stands by them. (And this one goes for all types of love.) She is quiet and sometimes seems distant, but she is always there when they need her. And when it comes to life or death she would sacrifice herself for a good friend. She is immensely protective and feels it is her duty to defend her friends’ lives.

chartreuse: if you had to describe your muse with a color, what color would it be and why?

Purple. 1, because it’s her favorite color and she defines herself. She does whatever the fuck she wants and doesn’t sugar coat it. 2, because she is mysterious and there’s something in her heart that is magical. When someone earns her friendship and trust it feels like an otherworldly gift.

anise: when it comes to self-care, what does your muse do to take care of themselves? do they take care to spend time on it, or do they feel they don't deserve it?

******

new leaf: what message would your muse send to their past self, if any?

“Stop sleeping with men who aren’t available, you hate drama, you know this causes it…come on, girl.”

moss: how easily does your muse adapt to any new situations they're thrust into?

It depends on the situation, but she does adapt QUICKLY, but not often well. Like I’ve said a few times…impulsive. She acts quickly and it’s not always the right move, but something will certainly happen and change as a result, whether intended or not.

silk: does your muse care about appearances much? do they spend a lot of time on their own appearance, or do they just go with the flow each day?

She caters to herself very frequently, she keeps herself looking and smelling good at all times. She even keeps her outfit flashy, after the end of the world.

sanguine: does your muse typically have an optimistic, pessimistic, or some middle ground outlook on life?

Middle ground. She is a hardcore realist and relies on logic. (She’s also hot-headed and makes bad decision, but when it comes to overall outlook she is super realistic.)

atoll: if your muse could go anywhere, without any restrictions whatsoever, where would they go? why would they go there?

******

cool grey: if your muse could ensure one thing for certain in their future to come, what would it be?

(Assuming this means something she’d wish for, not something she knows will happen.) The safety of her friends and family…or peace with her past.

black: does your muse have a 'bucket list?' list some things your muse wants to accomplish before they die.

Probably a few perverted things.

I think with the world ending, she’s past the point of bucket lists. Death is just a part of life. She lives every day like it’s her last.

[shipcestuous]

Andy and Lauren

Anon #1:

In the new year's episode of the gifted i felt a bit bad about Andy because when his sister's met Wes again (the one andy supported because he knows the other is a good guy) he immediately turned around and involved himself in his solitude. I think that scene speaks a lot, he wants to fight he wants to feel special but he needs his family and ends up feeling alone. Nevertheless Wes and Lauren can never stay together for real so dont worry. Andy is a really deep interesting character for me.

I saw that Lauren’s love interest was back again in 1.11 but he was gone by 1.12, thankfully. Andy’s reactions to him almost make it worth it. In the two part finale when Lauren passed by Andy and came in to speak to him, he asked her why she wasn’t with Wes in a way that made him sound very jealous, like he was always does (even when he’s supportive). 

It’s very interesting what you say about Andy’s solitude. I think he does need his family but he also chooses to close himself off a lot - sometimes when he needs them the most. 

Anon #2:

I'm sorry, every time I see those scenes of Lauren and Andy holding hands and their powers activating and them just looking at each other, it just reminds me of the dramatic slow-mo that happens sometimes in anime like when two characters realize they like each other or something. Even if I *didn't* ship sibcest regularly, I would still be unable to NOT think of it that way.

Right? It’s just so romantic. The slow-mo, the wind, the pretty golden light. I mean...

I’m glad the people who make the show were able to look at that and say “platonic siblings” - we reap the benefits of their mistake. Of course, presumably, the first siblings to do Fenris weren’t platonic, so...

It really works best for siblings who are a couple, right? Because it makes sense for siblings to be born with complementary powers, but the way they use them is so romantic. So I say: both. 

@cietsutsu:

Just wanted to share some of my favorite Andy/Lauren fanvids. I can imagine how someone who doesn’t watch the show and/or know about their characters being siblings would assume they’re an actual pairing. That’s how romantic their scenes look to me lol 

I think casual onlookers would think they were a couple as well, especially if we cherry-picked certain scenes, particularly when they use their powers.

Thanks for sharing these fanvids! I’m pleased there are so many good ones. Now the fic community needs to catch up.

Anon #3:

P1 worth watching the gifted ep12-13. 1st jealous Andy is back, Andy/Lauren hurting each other, Lauren wanting to protect Andy from himself, Andy being a brat but following her nevertheless and the ending, Andy left!!! Like some anon said here: Lorna/Marcos are soulmates and like a parallel for Andy/Lauren, and just as the main couple break up we got Andy/Lauren saying goodbye as if they were breaking up too. Lauren begging really got me. Lorna/Andy and Lauren/Marcos are such similar characters

P2 I can't with their ships, I love these cliché couples: one pure soul + one big baddass with a dark soul. The writers are doing great by placing subtexts with the von struckers (comic canon twincest) and Lorna/Marcos as the perfect soulmate couple, for sure this isn't something random, it was planned, the writers want me to ship it! I cannot wait to see what happens next and I reaaaaally hope that Marcos/Lauren don't give up in their partners. 

I did skim 1.12/1.13 for Andy/Lauren scenes, and was not disappointed by the screentime or amount of focus on their relationship, though of course it’s so hard to watch them at odds like this.

I also noticed the extremely heavy parallels between Andy/Lauren and Lorna/Marcos. Incredible. Marcos and Lauren watching Lorna and Andy walk away was heartbreaking but the parallel made me so happy at the same time. 

Marcos and Lauren reacting to the changes they were seeing in Lorna and Andy was so similar. And then they had the same “break up”. 

Anon #4:

The Gifted is the gift that keeps on giving! The season finale is very good for Lauren & Andy and we can expect lots of angst on S2. They reveal they used pretend they were the X-Men when they were little and most of the fandom is joking they played as Jean and Scott due to their incest vibes. Everybody can see it.

I LOVED that bit about them playing at being the X-Men. That was such a great piece of worldbuilding and an adorable glimpse into their childhood together. That is too hilarious about them pretending to be Scott and Jean - I love that the fandom is joking about that. I mean, it’s probably true, too, given their prominence. 

Anon #5:

*SPOILER* Lauren whispering "Please don't leave me" as a last plea to Andy broke my heart during The Gifted's finale. Everyone pretty much guessed that the Strucker siblings will get separated in the end. It's like The 100 all over again. Also, I found it interesting that she said "me" instead of "us." It really emphasizes how special his relationship with her is compared to his other relationships-- like it seems she truly believes that he may turn his back on everyone, but not when it's her.

You know your ship is good when one of them says, “Please don’t leave me”, ESPECIALLY if it would have made sense for them to have said “Please don’t leave us” instead, but they didn’t.

That moment was beautiful, and it’s almost worth this split happening in order to have had that moment. You can tell Andy was moved by it, but not enough to stay. It wasn’t easy for him to leave like that but it’s not as hard on him as it is on Lauren, because he knows he can always come back, whenever he wants to. 

Personally I would rather see more of the early season status quo than this Bellamy/Octavia DRAMA nonsense but I think what’s important is that the show is putting a lot of focus on their relationship and it’s getting a lot of attention. It’s not just the Strucker family but truly Andy and Lauren and their relationship. First they were bonding over both being mutants, then figuring out about Fenris, and now they’re in different factions and pulled apart by ideology. 

But at least we know, because of Fenris, that no matter what they’ll always be more powerful together. And as they both said, they love that feeling of using Fenris so they’ll be drawn to it, whether the show explores that or not. 

Anon #5

I got a smile when Lauren said "Andy Please don't leave me". I feel like they were inspired by star wars. But I hope they don't rip it off because Andy isn't Kylo. He's conflicted but I think he's a fairly good person that could turn around. P.S I also hated the endless scrolling!

That did remind me of Kylo Ren and Rey, quite a lot. A funny coincidence that both would happen within a month though I’m sure the episode was done filming before The Last Jedi came out. If Kylo Ren/Rey is meant to be canon romantic - that’s up to JJ but was clearly Rian Johnson’s intention - then the parallel is all the more interesting, just like the parallel with Lorna and Marcos. 

Sorry about the endless scrolling. I never would have set it up that way on purpose, it was just the default. I need to find the time to do a new theme.