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ash5monster01 · 1 year ago

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Perfect To Love Part 14

Pairing: Steve Harrington x FemReader!PlusSize

Warnings: fluff, mentions of bullying, body image issues, fat shaming, angst, trust issues, language.

Summary: Beth Walker was used to living in the shadows. She had only one friend and anyone else who paid her mind usually bullied her for her size. So she learned to keep her mouth shut, her head down, and her heart closed because she had to accept the fact that she would be nothing more than the fat girl to people. That is until Robin decides Beth needs more in life and that might just include a boy who she never would’ve thought could see her for who she truly was.

word count: 2,848

Part 13 ←→ Part 15

Masterlist

Neither Alan or Allie fought Beth when she said she wasn’t going to school that morning. After all it was the day before Thanksgiving break so how much could she really be missing? So they both left for work, leaving Beth alone in her bed to stare out at the small inch of snow that covered the earth. It would probably melt and return a few times until winter completely swallowed them whole, but for now she would be heartbroken while the earth froze and for some reason that thought made her somewhat content.

Steve had called Robin in a panic, telling her that he had tried to call Beth only to be told she didn't want to talk to him. Robin had tried to call herself only for Allie to inform her of the same thing. She tried to recall ay moment, maybe something that happened at school that could make Beth shut them out, but she came up completely short. She assured Steve that it could be something else bothering her entirely and she would talk to her tomorrow. But when Beth didnt show up for school Robin found herself worrying more and more that maybe it was something that she did.

“She’s not here” Robin grumbled once she was sat in the front seat of Steve’s BMW his head on a swivel, searching each of the Escorts in the parking lot in hope to find hers.

“Something has to be wrong” Steve finally said and Robin sighed as she leaned back in the seat. She wasn’t used to being shut out.

“Obviously Steve, any clue what it could be?” she didn’t mean to sound so rude but the sarcasm and annoyance was unavoidable while she stressed about her friend.

“Not a thought” he muttered, eyes still scanning the parking lot in hopes she’d appear.

“What’d you do?” both of the teenagers jumped as Dustin appeared in the back seat of the car, slamming the door shut behind him.

“Jesus Dustin, what do you even mean?” Steve asked, a hand over his heart as he tried to calm its pace.

"Beth didn't show up to free period with me and Eddie and she would never miss school. So what did you do?" Dustin accused, pointing at Steve and ready to skin him alive for any wrong doing to his new friend.

"Nothing, I dont know. Me and Robin both called last night and her Mom said she didn't want to talk to us. We're just as confused as you" Steve defended himself but Dustin wasn’t fully convinced.

"Well we better figure it out before she goes to New York for Thanksgiving" Dustin said leaning back in the seat and buckling himself in. Confused looks plastered across both the older friends faces and Dustin almost rolled his eyes.

"She's going away?" Steve started to ask because he felt like this was something he should have known but maybe he just missed it, forgot. No way he could've forgotten.

"Look we'll worry about that later but I have a plan, drive to Beth's" Robin said and Steve obeyed, shifting the car into gear, and taking off down the roads covered in a soft layer of white snow. They all were relieved to see the Escort in the driveway but neither of her parents vehicles.

After a mostly silent ride, everyone experiencing different thoughts over this disappearing act Beth had pulled. Steve racked his brain and hated to admit that his thoughts always went back to Colin. He probably said something and ruined it, upset her, and he was fully prepared to kill him if need be. Robin worried that she got scared, scared of being with Steve, and not thinking she was good enough, and she was ready to prove her wrong. Where Dustin fully stood behind the fact the two idiots had done something whether it was intentional or not.

"So what's this masterplan?" Steve asked nervously, stomach doing somersaults over the fact she was just inside.

"This" Robin said as she grabbed a stack of books from her bag. "It's Beth work for over break, I collected it for her so I had an excuse to come here"

"Genius!" Steve praised and Dustin rolled his eyes. They were definitely both idiots.

"Look give me just a minute and then I'll give you guys a signal to join me" Robin said and they both nodded as she slipped out the car and into the cold. They watched as she stood on the porch, raising a nervous hand to ring the doorbell.

Beth groaned audibly as she heard the doorbell ring throughout the house. Quickly she tugged on a hoodie as she rushed down the stairs to see who from her mothers church group she'd have to turn away. Yet when she glanced through the peephole she was met with her twitchy and nervous friend Robin. Ex friend. "I don't want to talk to you"

"I'm not here to talk" Robin said after flinching from the response her friend had given her.

"Robin, you always have something to say" Beth sighed out, almost so quietly through the door she didn't hear it.

"Beth I have your school work, I'm worried about you, that's all" Robin counter offered and Beth pressed her forehead aginst the door wishing she would’ve just let whoever rang the doorbell go away.

"Just leave it on the porch, please" Beth said sounding a bit strangled from trying to fight off the tears that were burning to come out.

"Beth what did I do, why are you shutting me out?" Robin ignored her request and Steve and Dustin both noticed she was talking to the closed door, only assuming Beth was on the other side.

"Just leave it Robin" Beth finally cried out and Robin sighed as she leaned to set the stack of books at the foot of the door. Steve hit the steering wheel as he watched Robin retreat back to the car and jump inside to escape the cold.

"Let me try" Dustin said, pushing himself out of the back seat before Steve could ask what had happened. Dustin wrapped his arms around himself, the wind pushing his hat back slightly as he approached the door. He was about to ring the doorbell when he still heard Beth's soft cries on the other side.

"Beth, what’s wrong?" he called out and Beth gasped slightly at the sound of Dustin's voice, backing away from the door so he couldn't hear her.

"Nothing Dustin, don't worry about it, please" she called back and Dustin sighed as he tried to keep from shivering in the cold.

"We're all so worried about you" he said and Beth felt more tears burn at her eyes because choosing to leave behind Steve and Robin included everyone else including this sweet young boy who had become such a good friend to her. That thought broke her heart even more as she considered that in the friend divorce they would all get the kids she had come to know and love.

"I know Dustin, and you're the best for checking on me. I just need to be alone" and before Dustin could respond he heard her footsteps rushing up the stairs. The pair in the car watched his shoulders drop as he returned to the car himself after another failed attempt.

"That was a bust" Dustin said as he closed himself into the warmth of the vehicle. Steve's heater working over time. "She ran back upstairs before I could say anything else"

"Robin which room is hers?" Steve questioned and Robin gave him a confused look before pointing to the left window above the canopy of the porch. "I'll be back"

"Wait Steve, dont get hurt!' Robin called after him but he slammed the drivers side door shut while ignoring her. Dustin leaned forward to watch as Steve jogged up the porch. As if he had done this a hundred times before he was swigning a leg to stand on the rail. He used one of the beams to keep balance as he stood up, twisting his body to grip the edge of the canopy, and begin to pull himself up. Steve had always been strong because of swimming and basketball and now he was strong from staying in shape to fight monsters. Thankfully it came in handy as he finally got majority of his body on the canopy and he was able to walk across and face her window.

Before he tapped on the glass he saw her curled in bed, the room dark as she shook with tears and his heart broke. He wanted to know what he had done, what they could do to fix it. Giving in he tapped on the glass just to see her jump before looking at him with a tear stained face. Beth went against her better judgment and stood to open the window. Steve couldn’t help but smile as she revealed herself to him as he sat crouched out her window. "You're gonna get hurt"

"It was worth the risk" he told her and she sighed, using the sleeve of her hoodie to wipe her face clean of tears. "Can I come in?"

"I don't think you should" she responded and he tried to hide his disppoitnent in her response. Sighing he leaned closer into the window, heart accelerating at how beautiful her hazel eyes looked. So clear from the tears she had let fall. Beth wished he didn't look so handsome himself, hair fluffy and lashes covered in soft snowflakes. She wanted to kiss each one of them away.

"Why are you shutting us out?" Steve asked and Beth sighed, more tears fighting to come to her eyes. He wanted to reach out to her, hold her, but he was worried he’d scare her away.

"I stopped into Family Video yesterday" Steve gave her a confused look, clealry recalling she hadn't been there because she had work herself. Then it dawned on him that him and Robin had been talking about her at work, talking about their plan, that she had been using the back door lately. The exact one he knew you could hear crystal clear through because he had done it himself.

“Oh Beth, you don't understand-" but Beth was holding up her hand, stopping his defense because she didn't want to hear anymore bullshit from either of them.

"Did you know Colin told me he had feelings for me?” Steve was confused again as he let these words sink in. "He told me he hated himself for being attracted to me when everyone else bullied me for being ugly and do you want to know what I said to him?"

"What?" Steve whispered, never have seeing Beth this angry before. It was like he had pushed her past the sad part and now she was just frustrated.

"I told him I ended up with you because you got to know me without someone asking you too, and that made all the difference" Steve sucked in a sharp breath as she told him this, realizing that in a way they had done her wrong. The intentions were pure but maybe she was right. Maybe Steve would have never looked at her without Robin asking him too.

"Beth, please let me explain" she was shaking her head and Steve felt his heart collapse because she had already decided he wasn't worth it. Just like everyone else did.

“I don’t need an explanation Steve. I get it. Robin is your friend and maybe you have changed, it’s not your fault you can’t be attracted to me. You were just being a good friend to Robin” Beth said and Steve realized she had it all wrong. Robin may have asked him to spend time with her but falling for her was all him.

“That’s not it” he started to shake his head but the look she gave him made him stop.

“Please, I can’t be hurt by you again. Let me go” and as Steve went to open his mouth and stop her again she was sliding the window close, clicking the lock, and shutting the curtains. He let out a defeated sigh as she completley shut him out and tears began to rim his eyes. He was angry and hurt for her. He thought he had changed but maybe he didn’t because if he did he would've given Beth a chance and not just now but on that first day of freshman year.

Carefully he made his way back down the canopy and onto the porch where he jogged to his car now that he was completley frozen through. Robin and Dustin looked at him curiously as he settled in his seat, cheeks red and bitten from the cold. He took a moment to absorb the heat, keeping his eyes forward because he was pretty sure he was about to cry and he didn't want them to see that. He didn't want to be pitied because this was his karma, he deserved it for being an asshole all of those years. He was no better than his father, Tommy, Carol, or the rest of the assholes at that school.

"Well, did you see her?" Robin questioned and Steve sighed, glancing out the window to blink away the tears that came to his eyes.

"She came to Family Video yesterday" he said but it didn’t occur to Robin as quickly as it did Steve.

"No she didn't we had a dead shift, we spent majority of it putting away tapes and talking" Robin argued but Steve finally turned and gave her a pointed look.

"And what were we talking about Robin?" again she looked confused but then it dawned on her, realization covering her features.

"She thinks I made you do it, and you were pretending" Robin said and Steve nodded as she buried her face in her hands.

"Do what?" Dustin asked from the back seat but he went ignored.

"She's upet because she thinks I was using her and she's upset that you put her in that position" Steve said rubbing his hands together to regain some warmth.

"Oh God, did you try to explain that it wasn't like that?" Robin asked, heart now aching because she truly was the reason her friend was hurt and now she was no better than all those other kids that had hurt Beth all these years.

"Yeah but she didn't want to hear it. She told me Colin admitted to having feelings for her, that he hated himself for feeling that way, and she told him that the reason we ended up together is because I got to know her without someone asking me too" as Robin gasped Dustin started to piece together what exactly they were talking about.

"Robin you made Steve hang out with Beth?" Dustin whispered and they both turned back to look at him, uneasy looks on their face.

"It wasn't like that, I wanted Steve to get to know her and I figured if people saw Steve with her they'd give her a break. We planned nothing else, we swear" Robin told him and Dustin fell back into the seat with an annoyed chuckle.

"She has every right to be mad you guys, you used her. Your intentions may have been good but what if Steve didn't like her, he was pretending the whole time, and she found that out. That is so shitty of both of you. Of you doing it to her and Steve for going along" Dustin said as he began the shake his head, now angry with both of them too.

"I didn't think of it like that when we first planned it" Robin said, tears now rimming her eyes as well because she broke her best friends heart. That was all her.

"You shouldn’t of planned anything, you could've just brought her to movie night with no plan in place and hoped for the best" Dustin said now looking out the window and away from either of them. He had warned Steve not to hurt her and he loved his friends but he began to love Beth too. Now he was going to lose her because all of them were idiots.

"Let's just give her space, maybe when she gets back we can reach out again and apologize" Steve said putting the car into reverse as Robin quietly cried in the front seat. He was trying not to cry himself, driving through blurry vision because he had hurt beth whether he intended to or not and now Dustin was mad at him.

"If it's any consolation Dustin I did fall for her, whether it was intentional or not" he said as he drove in the direction of his house and Dustin just grunted in response because he knew Steve was telling the truth but that didn't change what had happened.

After all how do you convince the girl who thought she could never be loved that you really did fall for her?

Taglist: @kindablackenedsuperhero @rinarecommends @starryeyedpoet17 @crustless-toast @loverofmarsss @alexa-33 @bethanysnow @middle-of-the-earth @princessadriana4-blog @mochminnie @legendaryhumandiplomatgoop @a-lil-bit-nuts @i-came-as-bostonian @krazyk99 @thunderstomp-and-tequila @cumslutforaemond @futuristicbirdtraveler @unholyhuntress

Comment if you want to be added the the tag list :))

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luvinelysia · 2 years ago

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(ex) lovers under arrest !

pairing: scaramouche x reader (smau + written)

genre: exes to lovers, fluff, filo

wc: 1.1k

notes: this was supposed to be a valentines special while also serving as a teaser for an upcoming smau im working on but uhm this didnt really fit into the smau's plotline. think of it as me testing the waters. although this isnt included in the new smau's plot, all the characters here are the same characters on that smau too. i didnt proofread this btw sawry..

the door opened which caught both of your attention. the door revealed tighnari and the rest of the student council. you knew what they were here for and you dreaded it.

tighnari quickly explained what was happening although you both already knew why you were here.

'bwisit talaga toh sila!! kapag ako makapaghinganti—' you thought as the council students put the handcuffs between you two. the indigo-haired boy groaned completely annoyed at the situation.

"ugh, i cant believe im wasting my time being handcuffed to someone like them..." scaramouche complained, making you annoyed. "grabe ka makapagsalita ha, akala mo kung sino ka?? ano ka ba, gold?" you retorted

"how noisy... di ka marunong mag shut up?" he complained again making you even more agitated than before. 'porket na pogi ka ganyanin mo ako?!?—' you wanted to say but kept it in your mind as to save your pride.

"remember, wag kayo makipag away. pwede nyo ipatanggal ang handcuffs pag lumipas na ang isang oras unless kung nagpaextend yung bumayad sa inyo." the stuco president— tighnari, reminded.

"sana pinahandcuff nyo naman ako sa lalaking maganda ang ugali" you insulted as he groaned "you talk a lot for someone whos much more unbearable" he surely didnt fail to irritate you. "i swear, kung malaman ko kung sino yung nagpahandcuff..." he mumbled something undearneath his breath but you didnt bother listening in. you were too preoccupied with your internal panicking.

the both of you left the booth and stood infront of the entrance for a while. you didnt know where to go since you'd have to basically drag the boy handcuffed to you to be able to enjoy the next hour.

after standing there like two idiots, scaramouche dragged you to walk around. "hoy! saan ka papunta?? nakalimutan mo ba na andito pa ako? sabihin mo muna san ka pupunta before you drag me around!"

scaramouche ignored your constant screaming as the people around gave you weird looks while some of them were awwing about how you two were handcuffed.

"yieee!!! may crush ka na pala scara?" you hear a ginger-haired boy shout in the background which you assumed to be scaramouche's friend. he ignored the ginger haired boy as the both of you walked towards a more secluded area.

he took you to the library (technically dragging you) as he opened the doors and stepped in. "i wanted to go to the library since its more quiet here" he seemed a lot more calm now unlike how he was earlier when he was constantly complaining. "i hope you dont mind me dragging you here. it was too loud for me out there" his change in attitude startled you. was this really the same scaramouche that yelled and complained earlier? perhaps he was just overwhelmed?

he walked over to the shelves to find a book to read which caused you to stumble since again, you were still handcuffed. he searches for a book that interests him until he finally picks up a book. he looked at you for a moment. "...baka gusto mo rin bumasa? it'd be awkward if you just stood there while i read.."

"no its fine... tutulog nalang ako dito" you said as he sat down on the floor leaning against the shelved, which caused you to stumble amd get dragged down on the floor.

"...bat ka umuupo dyan, eh may lamesa at upuan naman doon" you pointed at the tables and chairs lined up. "you said you wanted to sleep and it'd be uncomfortable for you to sleep if you sat down there" his gaze never leaving the book. "as if mas comfortable pa dito..." you mumbled as you sat down properly to make yourself more comfortable.

he gazed at the handcuffs as he grabbed your wrist to pull you closer to him which caused you to flinch. the close proximity startled you, painting your face and ears a bright red. you didnt know what to say, and as much as you try to deny you didnt want to move away either so you just sat there, with your head on his chest.

"..sorry" he finally spoke up. "i know how much you dont wanna talk about the past... but i just want you to know that i still love you" his sudden confession made you even redder than you are now.

"tumahimik ka nga.. ang corny mo" you tried to look anywhere but his gaze. he chuckled at your response. somethings just never change. "besides, antagal na noon. mas mabuti pa kung kalimutan nalang natin—"

"what if ayaw kita kalimutan?"

curse scaramouche and his way with words!! "tama na please baka mahuhulog ulit ako sayo" you said nonchalantly, which made him chuckle. "what if i wanted that?"

"i know you have a lot of questions and im willing to answer them" he let go of the book he was holding as he held your hand. "im sorry for leaving without saying anything or giving you a reason. i felt like you deserved someone better than me." he spoke as you listened intently

"i noticed how much you prioritized me over yourself. i realized how much time you wasted on me instead of pursuing whats best for you. i realized how much i didnt deserve you"

he kissed the top of your head which sent butterflies on your stomach. you were supposed to be mad at him damn it! not fall in love!

"i miss you, y/n. please give me another chance." his voice was soft. you could tell he was being genuine. and who are you to deny someone like him? after all, you arent exactly the strongest person out there.

'god, alam nyo naman hindi ako malakas, marupok lang ako'

"namiss talaga kita kuni." you started after a bit of silence from your side as his heart beat when you said his name. "sino ba naman ako para sumabi ng hindi. marupok lang naman ako"

he chuckles as he kissed the top of your head.

"alam mo ba? mahal talaga kita" he said as you groaned "yuck ang corny mo talaga... i love you too.." you mumbled the last part but it was loud enough for scaramouche to hear.

the both of you stayed in that position for a while until your one hour was finally over. if this was you one hour ago you might have been relieved to be finally be free from this pure evil named scaramouche but now, you cant help but want to extend it as to not let him go again.

you both walked back to the booth as tighnari and the others removed the handcuffs. your wrist felt a bit sore as you rubbed it.

"congrats on surviving an hour" tighnari joked as scaramouche simply glared at him. "pwede nyo rin mapahandcuff ang friends nyo"

"we dont really need—" scaramouche was cut off by you.

"actually meron ako gusto ipahandcuff" you said while mentally laughing about what might be thoma's reaction.

#scaramouche x reader #wanderer x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #genshin scaramouche #genshin wanderer #genshin kunikuzushi #scaramouche fluff #scaramouche imagines #wanderer fluff #wanderer imagines #kunikuzushi fluff #kunikuzushi imagines #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin #genshin x reader #eulie.txt

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not-a-big-slay · 2 years ago

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Until it doesn't hurt

kaz brekker x fem!reader

warnings: talks of murder, slavery,

a/n: long ahh chapter, but thats what you get as an apology for waiting. i didnt forget about this series and id be damned if i ever would. there are only two chapters left- part 12 and the epilogue, so please stick around and i will try to get them out sooner than this chapter. it was almost half a fuckin year??!!! oh i need a wake up call goddamn. anyway, thank you for reading it and the positive comments here and on wattpad! enjoy this chapter :)

part 11/13:

previous part: part 10

next part: part 12

masterlist

taglist (sorry to bother everyone, i know it has been 5 months..):

@chickencouncilrep

@venomsvl

@happy-nico

comment to be added, two chapters left

"Sounds risky."

"It is."

"And suicidal."

"Yes."

"Also impossible."

"Very much so."

Jesper was amused by the conversation between Inej and Y/N. He has learned his poker partner had only a day left to finish her job. Killing Pekka Rollins couldn't be easy, so when she knocked on the door of Inej's old room, he could see just how anxious Y/N was and how desperate her voice rang when she proposed teaming up with his old friend. Their shared feeling of duty may help them cooperate and increase chances of ending the monster's life. However Inej's former enlightment that came from the hitman's good idea now seemed lost as Y/N shared her deadly plan.

Jesper was just happy to be in the same room, he didn't feel included, nor should he. It wasn't like he would join them, but even men living from the adrenaline of risks would doubt this scheme. It included too many holes that would serve trouble to sneek in "I don't know, Y/N." voiced her uncertanty Inej, "I understand you have limited time, but I'd rather be late than dead." Jesper agreed silently by nodding as they watched the girl think with furrowed eyebrows, not realizing she already is one of those choices. Jesper cleared his throat, he really didn't want to speak, but he couldn't allow Y/N to drag his friend to provoke death herself. "It's not exactly... bulletproof, is it?"

The plan goes as this: Y/N would send a message to Rollins, preferably not a dreg messenger, to meet him somewhere yet not disclosed where. First hole: the Dime Lions' leader will not listen to a mysterious note and probably will not come. Y/N reassured them he will, but didn't gave them a reason to believe that. After the target arrives at the place that's, again, still non-existent, he comes to face Y/N and some 'old friend', as the girl said. Second hole: Y/N won't tell them many key details to the plan, they are just supposed to

"Trust me, it will work."

Inej sighed loudly, clearly trying to find trust in this girl within her. "Are you sure he'll come alone?" she pointed out a part of the plan where they will meet Rollins alone. Third hole, for obvious reasons. "He won't have a reason not to. Our only leverage is that he doesn't suspect I know you, he still thinks I'm on my own." the hitman cleared up and ran a hand through her hair. At least she briefly explained to them that she had met Rollins before, that her job was sort of a revenge, but didn't tell them for what, nor they expected her to. Jesper wanted to keep his mouth shut, but it seemed he was the only one that saw another problem with her statement. "Remind me then, Y/N." the person mentioned turned her gaze away from the table covered under the map of Ketterdam and pleaded him to continue, "What did Rollins do exactly when he found out you were on your own? Kidnapped you is what." he didn't give her time to answer, because it wasn't a question. Finding her bloodied and strapped to a chair with Kaz pointing a gun at her was an unpleasant sight, more unpleasant was Y/N's story about how she got there. The image of the night appeared as if on cue in his mind and made him add: "And who was robbing him on the night you escaped?" Y/N's hands pushed themselves off the table before her legs started to slowly pace the room, hopefully thinking about Jesper's words.

"That's true. His guards saw us all escaping, there is no way you are considered to be alone." Inej supported his doubts and made the girl stop in tracks, her back facing them. Candles lit the room brightly and they flickered when Jesper thought about his utter confusion after finding out Kaz and Y/N knew each other since childhood. He assumed Kaz was born a teenager with insanity inside his genes, the thought of him being a demon that crawled out from hell also crossed his mind. No one knew exactly about his past, no one except maybe for Y/N, but since they seem to hate each other now, it's probably for their own good to not posses the knowledge of Kaz as a child. It was silence for a while until Y/N's words cut through it. "Well, he might be stupid enough to come alone," she let out a sigh and Jesper swore he saw goosebumps on her neck as she finished the sentence, "but not naïve enough to think Kaz would help me."

After Rollins arrives, Inej- present in the skies- will make sure he is indeed alone, or she gets rid of any other presence. Y/N aspires for the place of meeting to be dark, so Inej is not seen while working. After doing so, the spider will stand in the dark behind Pekka, waiting for her cue to put a knife on his throat. Jesper assumes there will be some dialogue between Y/N and Rollins before the two kill him, he fancies it as some sort of drama play they often held on Eil Komedie in a theater. He'd definitely took Wylan to see this play with him, but would rather avoid the same scenario in real life. And how they kill him: the hitman will shoot him, somewhere fatal but where he won't die instantly. Then, she will hit him until only a toe is left touching the alive side of border between life and death. Inej will then 'keep her promise'. or simply put, carve his heart out. Brutal, but poetic in Jesper's opinion. He will die a painful death, Y/N gets her money and revenge and Inej finishes a long undone job, everybody wins.

The girl turned to them, she saw the hesitation in their eyes and walked closer. "I know it's dangerous, but if we won't do it, someone else will." Jesper sinked into confusion and let it show on his face freely, Y/N for his sake quickly explained. "Someone, who holds grudges, will come for him. And they might do it in a more stupid and unprepared way. And then we will hate ourselves for not taking the risk." She looked at Inej and finished: "There's not enough Pekkas for everyone's revenge" Inej stared at her as the mastermind opened her mouth with one last question to ask: "Are you in?" Her eyes digged in Inej as they awaited for answer. She looked at Jesper first, as though he would somehow help. The boy just shrugged, what else to do, he is not part of it. She turned to Y/N again and a simple movement of her head made her understand and walk towards the door.

As she opened it, she turned to Inej and said: "Tomorrow night, after 4 bells until midnight, east stave, just behind Smeet Residence. You'll know." and left. Jesper watched Inej dragging her finger along the map and stopping at the possible building Y/N mentioned. She examined it, the boy could almost hear her mind as she thought about the route she'll take, her eyes caressing the paper streets and houses. Smeet residence belongs to Cornelis Smeet, he played cards with him before when they tried to save Inej from Van Eck. The feeling of nostalgia and warmth hit him. Oh, to go back as things were.

"Do you really trust her?"

"Did you trust she won't hurt you when you brought her to Wylan's house?"

He smiled, he really shouldn't have done that. Even when the question was probably rhetorical, he answered with a serious face. "Yes." Y/N seemed like anything but a liar. Sure, she didn't tell them much about her or the plan, but she didn't feed them lies so they would agree. And he did felt safe with her on that night. He didn't know her for long, but a trace of trust began in him. Inej, as if his thoughts written themselves on his eyes, knew what he was thinking about and smiled.

"Then yes, I trust her."

Oh, how he missed Inej.

--------------------------------------------

She cursed herself with every step she took.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

It rang in her head every time her lungs ate the air.

Bad idea. Bad idea. Bad idea.

Yet everything stopped when she was staring at the tall bulding present at the very end of 5th Harbor. After Y/N spat out her trauma on Kaz, she sent a letter to her employer, who unfortunetely happened to be Deln. She never wanted to see him again and after meeting him in the church, she somehow got over the fact that she has to take her payment from him, so encoutering that man twice was unavoidable. Yet she almost puked when she wrote the letter that was begging him to see her. The letter didn't say much, she wanted to tell him about the plan personally, so feelings could be voiced and maybe even manipulate him to cooperate. Y/N also chose to tell him right before the plan starts, so he wouldn't have a choice or time to make up his mind. She has yet to admit Deln is crucial to her plan though, Rollins won't go alone without him present and will run if he won't see him there, a bussiness partner, a person that sold her to him all those years ago,

an old friend.

A chill ran down her back, even though it was quite a warm evening, no wind at the sea either. She looked at the watchtower again. The Council of Tides was supposed to look out for the sea and harbors, but one hardly saw them. As far as Y/N knew, the stadwatch was patroling the harbors. She wondered if anyone is up there, if the council even existed. They could have just built many watchtowers and manipulate a feeling of safety into people. Trust is a powerful tool. At that moment, Y/N felt uncertain that Deln will arrive. She chose to meet with a slaver at the council's feet. Not that they would care about some barrel rats, but he could play a scaredy cat.

The sound of heavy boots on the cobblestone, that decorated almost the whole Ketterdam, and the feeling of the world closing in on her while a heavy stone crashed her chest, the feeling she only gets around one person, were the signs Deln wasn't afraid. Y/N listened to him creeping closer, the old urge to run fighting with her, before she finally turned around and faced him again after 11 days.

"Snowflake" he exclaimed happily, the word shooting Y/N in her throat, drying it up. She hated how afraid he made her feel. It's been years, she was supposed to move on. Hopefully, she will after this is over. Maybe the afterlife exists and will forgive her for her sins after all. That gave her hope and courage to form a fake smile for the show. "Deln." she greeted him with a nod. The man stopped before her and put his hands on his hips, shaking his head with a smile. He seemed very pleased to see her, what a disturbing thing to notice. "Oh, it has been far too long."

As much as she needed to play nice, Y/N didn't resist rolling her eyes at that. "Could we not?" she tried to not let the harsh tone into her voice, but expected failuire. Deln just chuckled upon her response, but his smile disappeared shortly after, the friendly tone nowhere to be found when he asked: "What do you want? Job's done?" Y/N quietly sighed in relief he was finally himself before answering. "Almost. I came here to offer you a first row view at the murder of Pekka Rollins. The price? I get to use you as a distraction." the hitman smiled and tried to sell it to him as traders on the streets taught her. As much as he loved a good advertisement, Deln shook his head and scoffed.

"Still too proud to ask me for help?"

If I was proud, you'd drown in your blood 10 days ago.

"You will just stand around, doing nothing, watching your enemy to die." she said instead, "I'd even say I'm helping you."

Deln smiled and turned around to walk in circles, he always did that when thinking. The waves crashed as the sun almost fell asleep behind horizont, first and only stars slowly lit their light in the deep blue sky. Y/N wished Ketterdam was clearer, so the stars could shine brightly as they deserved. The slavery she lived in had always a hole in the roof in the back. When she couldn't sleep, she used to look at the night heavens above, naming the few little planets present. There were always only five she could see. First was named Fala, it was the smallest star out of all of them, easy to remember. Second got the name Nerezza, that happened to be the first star that appeared and the last to go away. For the third star Y/N came up with Lilith, named after a child that died by the cruel hand of Deln, she was the brightest. She didn't named the last one for a long time, it wasn't special, just lonely and always the farthest away from the rest. Yet after Rollins took her and then she returned to the place she hoped to never see again, the fifth star shined brighter than ever, still alone, but the four seemed to bow to it. Just then, full of anger and spite, she named them all.

"Oh, Y/N." his voice woke her up and the girl saw him stop. His back faced her and she could fully see the hump in it, his spine visible in the plain shirt he wore. Deln suddenly turned around, his brows furrowed, eyes darted in her, deep in thought. He realized.

"I'm already a part of this, huh?"

Y/N thought of the messanger that patiently waited for the 7th bell to ring through the city. "Rollins will expect you, he is only coming because of you," she inhaled the salt wind from the sea,

"he will die tonight because of you."

Deln's eyes showed he finally got the full importance of his part. Y/N knew she wouldn't have to bother with retelling her plan, she just needed to let him know Rollins will be alone and in the streets. And all of that depends on him, he cannot back out if he wants Pekka dead, because he is already involved.

"Everything fails without me."

He made himself sound important, which he was, but Y/N still cringed. He won't even move a finger and still praised himself for helping. She put it past her though, the 7th bell rang. The message is on it's way. "In a few minutes," the hitman started to walk slowly to Deln, "Pekka Rollins will get a message from you, saying you want to discuss your affairs. You told him to come alone, a conversation between 4 eyes. You also mentioned me being there, as a ransom in your favor." She wanted to continue, but the man stopped her. "Hold on, why do you think Rollins wants to do anything with you?" Y/N stopped as he interrupted and swalllowed when she was reminded of the night they kindapped her.

"If you wouldn't have left me, there wouldn't be a point of kidnapping."

"There is nothing sweeter than a family reunion."

"He hates leaving traces behind." Deln's eyes were pinned on her, but he was thinking behind them. There was no turning back. The messanger had to be close to Rollins now. If he won't be there, Y/N won't kill him and Rollins will probably come after the slaver. Not that she cared about Deln's life, Rollins killing him before she kills Rollins was her insane fantasy no amount of stolen luck could grant her. Not even the freedom papers could pride themselves as the main reason. Kaz was why she needs to finish this job. Only he deserved the revenge and she had to be the one to gift it to him. She was obssesed with the possibility of his forgiveness if she does this. It would lift up the heaviest stone on her consciousness before her deserved death.

The girl watched him as his face lit up. "How will he know it's me. There is no proof that I have sent the letter." Yet his face slowly darkened in confusion again when he saw Y/N furrow her eyebrows and smile a little.

"Because you've signed it, Deln."

He opened his mouth to protest, but nothing came out as everything connected. "The release papers." he sighed, still in awe. Y/N sighed in relief, she loved the feeling of the dominos falling perefectly on time. "You couldn't have remembered my signature. You couldn't have." it was more of a wish than a fact, he tried to convince himself there was a backdoor to this all, Y/N sealed them all though. She actually only focused on his signature, the distant feeling of an official freedom made her remember every single curve of his handwriting. When Rollins' guards were hitting her, the pain flashed it in her mind, keeping her going. Deln found her eyes and for the first time she saw fear in them. Not disgust or mockery, nor peace and happiness.

Fear. Of her.

"You little bitch." he whispered. He couldn't run, he couldn't deny anything. He was cornered. Messanger already delivered Deln's worst fear. Y/N knew he didn't want to be involved with Rollins' murder, that's why she was hired after all. His slave empire would fall if he would be accused of murdering the king of the Barrel, but if she was supposed to kill her past, she was going to kill everything.

A bell rang through the city. Quarter past seven.

Y/N looked up at the sky, a star right above her has shined her way through the mist. She recognized it immediately. "We have to go, can't leave him waiting." she stood before Deln, not moving until he does. He laughed silently, hiding behind his easy-going personality, fearing to accept his faith. After taking in a deep breath, he nodded to the side: "Lead the way."

Before they disappeared into the centre of the city, Y/N looked at her fifth star for the last time. In an hour, Rollins might be dead, Deln will take the blame and Y/N might get her peace in hell. The realization pained her, but she also saw the warm embrace of closure behind it.

A name of the star ran through her head. Little Y/N's whispered it into her ear as the wind picked up.

Karma. Coming for them all.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Kaz coughed when the water reached his nose, filling it up so he couldn't breathe, even though air was all around him and the hallways of the Emerald Palace were dry. Everytime they rounded a corner, one of the two Dime Lions that dragged him along moved his hand across his biceps, causing the waters wetting new parts of his body.

People say Kaz always has a plan and a backup plan for everything, and they are right. However, that was before Y/N appeared and claimed the spot in his heart and mind that he thought was either abandoned or dead. When the frustration he had on himself fizzled out, his cane was already carrying him to the steps of Pekka's place, knitting a quick plan on the way. Kaz thought the deed was done, when he ordered Rollins to say his brother's name and made him believe he buried his son, but apparently it wasn't enough. It will never be, Jakob Hertzoon had hurt many people, not just them. There could be other fools with dead siblings or parents, begging for revenge every night. Stupid kids, as he was once. He couldn't help them, but Dirtyhands will feel enough joy for all of them once the only thing functioning will be Rollins' heart.

That is for Y/N to take.

As he was slowly getting closer to Pekka's office, he didn't doubt the guards will be the easiest part. An old flame in him was ignited and it won't be put down 'till the blood paints every wall of this place. The guards stopped and tightened their grip as one of them opened a door to the office. Kaz thought of just throwing up on them, but kept it in until they pushed him on the floor and released their touch. He coughed again and the water disappeared once he took in the hard wooden floor. His ears picked up voices and the sight of his cane being handed to Rollins, then the men left and he was left alone with the lion.

Kaz pushed his face off the ground into a seated position. His cane hit the floor once before Rollins started talking: "Let's not waste our time Brekker. What do you want?" His accent rolling down his tongue as Kaz tried to stand up. The office looked smaller than his, but it gained one advantage on him once he saw the part of the room that served Y/N as backround when she said his name for the first time in a long time. Her voice still echoed somewhere in his mind and he could never find it and catch it. He never wanted to see her again, in all honesty he just wanted to put her in Hellgate, so she would never be anywhere without his knowledge again, but the R on his shoulder urged him to do this, to get their revenge and to see her at peace.

He cursed that R everyday.

When he was on the way up from his knees, a crow head digged into his shoulder, making him to look at the disgusting face the other person wore. His eyes yelled an answer into Pekka's and he frowned in annoyance once he understood. "Why do you all suddenly hunger for blood, eh? You had to plan this with her, ain't a chance you didn't." he complained while releasing a tension in Kaz's shoulder, letting him to stand up. The boy hated the mention of Y/N, even though he didn't say the girl's name, the knowledge about her could be heard. It only pour gasoline in the fire his eyes flashed. But Kaz wouldn't let him see, Rollins still had no idea Y/N visited the bastard and that they already caught up on the lost time. There was chance he knew, yet he would deny it even if she confessed into Rollins' face.

"Who are you talking about." It wasn't a question, he challenged him to talk about Y/N. However Kaz's fears became true when the man laughed exaggeratedly. "Oh come on! I know you broke her out of my house boy, don't pretend to be dumber than you are." Rollins sat down the cane by his table and reached a hand out for a bottle of whiskey. The sound of liquid knocking on the glass was followed by Pekka's hand that flipped the cup's contents inside his mouth. He'd let him have his last drink, after Dirtyhands is through with him, he'll probably throw it back out. Fingers tapped on the wooden table, disturbing the silence Kaz couldn't handle. "So, why are you doing it. For her?" The last sentence was mocking and rhetorical, quite ironic that it's the only right reason. Kaz limped slowly closer to his table, if he could get to the right spot, he should be able to pick his cane up.

With the 7th bell ringing in the distance, Rollins swallowed his second drink before he started to speak again: "She's not worth it son." Kaz noticed his eyes wandered into afar, making it a good oppurturnity to knock him out. Only if the sudden pain in his stomach caused by the petname disappeared. "You don't even know her, the things she's done." Wrong, thought immediately Kaz. She told him her entire life, leaving out only her birth maybe. But he tied his tongue and imprisoned it behind his teeth due to the concatration he fixed on his only weapon. Rollins didn't mind, he continued gladly to think about the old days.

Kaz's heartbeat fastened everytime he mentioned her, that Nina could be able to pick it up. This moment was one of the many recent, when he desired to go reverse time. Hell, delete it if needed, he just wished to be the 17 year old boy again, planning heists with his Crows, rolling his eyes at the overly-sweet endless pining between Jesper and Wylan, hearing Matthias call him numerous demonic and cursed names, entertaining himself by watching Nina and Inej silent-laugh at something stupid when he was bored. He's glad everyone is safe and that they persued their life callings, but some changes are hard to swallow and this one was still hot to eat. This crave of his heart made itself known before, last time when he saw Y/N in this very office, but now it altered a little, bringing him shame and joy at the same time.

Kaz could see a new person in the picture, laughing along side with the girls, learning Fjerdan solely for the purpose of mocking him, teasing Jesper and Wylan for being so corny. The person didn't fit the timeline, but that was besides the point. He could see her with him, by his side. It squeezed his heart and he didn't know if it's a hug or an attempt to crush it.

The door creaking turned his head around, stopping his hand just mere inches before his cane. A messanger. Rollins walked past Kaz and without a word, the newly present man handed him a letter and left. As the door shut, Kaz's hand made contact with the cane. Rollins' low and weak laugh called to his attention and once his eyes settled on him, the man brought his own pair up. The smile should've already warn him, but his ears waited to hear the conformation. Pekka lifted the letter to Kaz's eye level, as if he would see the small letters from their distance. Yet he knew what it was for sure once the receiver said:

"Speaking of the devil."

Moments after, the man whistled and within a second his guards busted the room, handling Kaz again. The boy tried to fight the hands off, he leaned back and then forth quickly, swinging his cane right after they let go a little, striking one in the stomache. The other got hit in the neck, but before he could finish either of them, a back- up came to aid, trapping him with their arms. He threw himself to sides, trying to loosen up their grip, however it seemed to seal him closer every move. Rollins' hearted laughter played to this scene and his voice continued with the same attitude after Kaz gave up. "Should've brought a gun on me son!" he laughed as he delivered his advice.

He could bring a gun, he could bring his whole crew, but the urge to kill him with his bare hands and stained his clothes with Hertzoon's blood was a virus that have spread all over him, controlling his doings and feelings. If holy water isn't enough to kill the devil, gun would be useless against Pekka Rollins.

The man wiped off tears from laughter and looked at the helpless boy. His hand stretched out to him with the letter between his fingers, his feet erasing the rest of the space. Kaz tried to avoid reading the letter, knowing it won't bring nothing else but additional pain. He often wondered how much of it can still fit in his heart. Of course when his view was filled with Y/N's handwriting and he had no other sight to see, he studied every line. Her signature writing didn't change much, it was still horrible. For a slave, it was a miracle to write at all though. He remembered having trouble to read the love note she'd written him, Jordie wasn't as helpful as he thought he would be, but Kaz lost the need to understand it. He could always find the little heart on every single one of those, that was plenty for him.

This note lacked hearts though, it also was readable and no love was expressed. It was signed by the slavor, Deln she named him. When the letter mentioned Y/N his heart fell. This was the plan to kill him.

"I mean," Pekka began to move his mouth again as he freed Kaz's eyes of the paper, "I'm told to go alone. But I won't mind the company."

He damned his pride for not bringing the gun after all.

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garciaasfluffypen · 2 years ago

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bright beginnings pt 7.

pairing: single dad!joseph quinn x fem!reader wc: 1.5k warnings: none

part six • part eight

a/n: IM SORRY IM SORRY I DIDNT NOTICE THIS WENT INTO THE BOTTOM OF MY QUEUE BECAUSE MY DUMBASS DIDNT SCHEDULE THE POST anyway enjoy a joe pov as a lil treat

being holed up in an office all day was not something joseph anthony francis quinn had figured would be in his books. but he found himself taking over the daycare he had devoted his life to, making it his lifes mission to revamp it from the inside out and make it better.

from his short time as owner, there were a gazzilion things he would like to change, including some staffing issues that were bothering him. out of the ten girls that worked there, y/n, destiny and claire were the three girls who were full time, meaning that they got the bulk of the hours. that had to change. there were two girls who dropped, saying they didn't have time to work much due to university, which left eight girls left to work. meaning if he split all the bulk of the hours with the three full timers… that left the part time girls jack shit. he felt horrible only giving some of the girls only ten hours a week, but there was only so much he could do without making more of them full time. he had been stuck in the office for about three hours now trying different versions of the schedule to figure out what would make the girls happy. bringing the full timers down from 45 to 32 opened up a chunk of hours he could divvy out between the other girls based on their availability, which could make it a bit easier. four of the eight girls had tight schedules due to uni, meaning he could potentially get a few more girls who were requesting more hours the hours they wanted.

but that was a headache for another day.

shutting his laptop, joe decided to step out into the playroom, where y/n was in charge of today. it was his idea to start having the girls rotate through the rooms, so that way all the kids could get acclimated to each staff member in case there needed to be any sort of coverage. so far, it seemed to be working well, especially because the twins started to open up to a few of the other girls rather than just sticking to y/n’s side all day. granted, days in the playroom were the harder days, because all riley and thomas wanted to do was play with her. it’s what started joe talking to them every day before coming in to remind them that yes, you can play with y/n but you need to let the other boys and girls play with her too. it went well for approximately five minutes before he realized they were wholeheartedly attached to her, and by god if he didn’t do something about it the twins would hate him forever.

he had to admit, she was cute. if it wasn’t for him being caught up in a messy divorce, he totally would have already asked you out on a date. but he had to hold himself off, knowing that julia would one hundred percent use that against him because that’s the kind of person she was. he didn’t know why they had even gotten together in the first place, not counting the fact that she wanted to appease her mother. set-up relationships never ended up working well, he found, and most of them reminded him of HR relationships- the ones you could always tell were fake. the ones that made people think love was real, only to shatter them to pieces when it came out that surprise, your faves weren’t actually together.

love was most definitely not that. and not what he had with julia.

before he could go down that wormhole again, his phone buzzed.

[ grace!! - 3:30pm ] joeee what are you doing tonight???? i miss youuuuuu

grace was one of his best friends from school. he and wesley had taken her under their wing the second she stepped into LAMDA, and the three of them had become inseparable. she had moved to london from america to pursue acting, considering it was one of the best acting schools in the world. joe definitely missed being on stage, but he had made the promise to himself that he would make more of an effort to provide for his kids, since acting could wait until they were a bit older.

[ 3:31pm ] do you miss me, or miss the kids? lol [ grace!! - 3:32pm ] obviously you, you’re my bestie! [ grace!! - 3:32pm ] but seriously what are you doing, rehearsal was canceled tonight [ 3:33pm ] not much, probably watching frozen with the kids and trying to avoid watching steve and maggie. you wanna pop over for tea? xx [ grace!! - 3:33pm ] is that even a question??? i’ll be there at five :)

looking over at the clock, joe figured he could pop out to the floor for about an hour before taking the twins home. saturdays were pretty light if he were being honest, so it probably wouldn’t be that big of a deal if he left a few hours earlier. most of the kids were gone by six anyway, so him leaving an hour early shouldn’t be horrid.

and then he could talk about his crush on y/n.

grace was there through the whole julia ordeal, meaning she knew all the ups and downs and the ahem “marriage” that julia’s mother basically shoved down joe’s throat, placing the ring in his hand and telling him to “get a goddamn move on”. yes, the loves of his life came out of it, but he hated julia and her dramatics and the need to make the divorce so much more than it needed to be. it was driving him up the walls, including the stupid custody agreement they were working on. he was doing his best to keep a level head, but it was getting to the point where he wasn’t sure what he was going to do. but grace was the level headedness he needed, always helping him figure everything out with wording and when to meet with lawyers and everything. she was definitely a light in his life, and he loved her to bits.

but his real loving nature was saved for y/n.

not that she’d ever get with him. he could always pretend that she was indeed flirting back with him. because while he really liked her, he was her boss. there were so many issues with that. but he also owned the daycare. and they didn’t have an HR person because it was a mom and pop shop. hell, he literally runs the facebook page. he could do whatever he wanted, right? … right?

“daddy!”

joe held his arms out as riley and thomas ran up to him, almost tackling him to the ground with their combined force.

“my angels! how has your day been?”

riley looked up at joe with her adorable little doe eyes. “daddy come play?”

“i gotta go talk to some of the lovely ladies a bit, but then we’re gonna go see grace!”

“grace comin?”

“yes, grace is coming for tea.”

out of the corner of his eye, joe noticed y/n turn away and start picking up in the playroom, trying to busy herself and not pay attention to the conversation. of course he would go and mention grace in front of her, after flirting with her so openly. just his fucking luck.

“grace bring wes?” thomas’ face lit up in excitement at the idea of two of his favorite people coming over.

“wes is at work, bub. he’ll come tomorrow, okay?”

“otay.”

“let me go say hi to the girls before we pop out, okay? go play with the toys.”

as joe rose from his crouching position, he noticed that y/n was stuck in the storage closet. stupidly, he decided to go around to all the other classrooms before coming back to the playroom to check on her before they popped out. the other girls were doing okay, which was good to hear. everything seemed to be going good since the rotation started, and it was showing. he stepped back into the playroom to gather riley and thomas, noticing that destiny was in, y/n being nowhere in sight. upsetting as that was for him, he did promise the kids that he would get them home to see grace. and besides, he really needed to talk to someone about his crush on y/n.

the ride home wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be, and the twins were relatively quiet but bubbling with excitement as they got closer and closer to the flat. soon as they saw grace’s car in the driveway, they started giggling and screaming, and joe couldn’t help but chuckle. grace held out her arms as the kids ran into them, picking them both up with ease and swinging around in a circle. she smiled at joe as he grabbed the bags from the passenger seat and took them inside, setting stuff down in the front room and taking them all into the kitchen to get the tea ready.

“so, who is she?”

“what?”

“you only wear your nice shirt anywhere when there’s someone you want to impress.” grace raised an eyebrow. “so who are you trying to impress, joe?”

joe sighed. “we’ve got a lot to catch up on.”

“oh, i bet.”

#joseph quinn #joseph quinn x y/n #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn rpf #bright beginnings universe #an i (queue) of 187

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megwritesnstuff · 8 months ago

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hi I'm alive though barely.

Winter was rough, thought things were getting a bit better around mid-February but then I got another really huge depressive episode so. L. But anyway.

I'm doing better now although pollen is killing me, also I've gotten really really into Genshin Impact, if you can't tell by the fanart reblogs, lol.

I'm doing my best to avoid spoilers, even though I know I'm waaay late to the scene. I've finally gotten to Sumeru after suffering for eternity in Inazuma.

(Ha, get it? Get it? Ok Megs shut up)

Anyway, Inazuma felt like. A real pain in the ass of an area. Exploration there and the world mechanics introduced in that area def werent my fave but thats ok! I'm loving Sumeru so far. Its very fun.

It really bothers me, though, that for an area that seems to be primarily based off of India/Southeast Asia, with some middle eastern and northern african cultures thrown in as well, that everyone is so... pale?

Like. I get it. Chinese game made by Chinese people, based on a heavy Japanese anime art style, like... maybe they didnt want to include a lot of brown people because it "doesn't fit with the style" like a lot of people in my middle school used to say? But like... Bruh. It feels sus as hell.

Like yeah, theres Deyha, but like... Idk. It just feels like. There should be a lot more. Brown ppl.

Like Deyha doesn't have much difference in her complexion than Kaeya? And from what I know so far (No spoilers PLEASE) Kaeya doesn't have any connections to Sumeru, and may even be from [REDACTED]? So liiiike?

Anyway. Love the game so far, super fun, getting really into the lore. I love Kaeya, Diluc, and Razor. I love Razor. SO MUCH.

I really am enjoying the game, the characters, and most of the exploration a lot, but it does feel very... intentional, that all of the characters from this area are just. White.

Anyway, I'm only part way through the Sumeru Archon quest, but if anyone wants to chat Genshin stuff please feel free! It's becoming a new special interest just like Elder Scrolls and dolls for me so

hfghkldfhgkldfhgkdhgfkd

I have a LOT I want to talk about with anyone willing to listem :D

#personal #im not dead haha #even though i kinda wish i was but ya know #PTSD life lmao #Anyway #Genshin Impact #please talk with me I need genshin buddies #kaeya alberich #diluc ragnvindr #Genshin Razor

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ectology · 1 year ago

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I have a genuine question, why didn’t you just message the artist from the beginning? Like I understand where your comment came from but I feel like fandom is supposed to be fun and if you genuinely felt a micro aggression from their art you could’ve educated them. The reason people are hating is because of how you personally handled the situation from doubling down to not taking peoples criticisms seriously. I think if you weren’t interested in talking to the artist why bother posting the art? Maybe make a text post to gripe instead of including the actual art. You’re blog is your own and you have a right to your opinion on your own blog and yes their art was cringe (although v cute style!) BUT it’s better to be cringe than mean. And I say this as a follower of your art and not a hater but some of the twitter replies you left were mean and unnecessary. I think that you got dog piled enough and don’t deserve all this negative attention but I think that people are struggling to see your remorse in the situation because you keep replying and restating your og opinions. Anyways I hope this dies out for both you and the other artist, seeing all this hate can’t be good for y’all’s mental health.

i didn't message the artist from the beginning because my comment wasn't a callout post. there was nothing wrong with the art, it wasn't a microaggression or problematic or whatever. i said a pretty mild thing about their art on my own twitter specifically so the artist WOULDN'T see it because it wasnt constructive criticism, it was literally just me noting that i didn't like something. going to the artist and being like "HEY I DON'T LIKE THIS THING" would have been pretty stupid and pointless, which is why i made a separate post. but fsr this was taken as condemnation of the art/artist or me calling them evil or something?? i dont get why my opinion on it even mattered or why that shit blew up the way it did

and no im not remorseful about what i said, i didnt say anything wrong. my regret is that by posting publicly and having that many people share it, my post got around to the artist as well which i definitely didn't intend. ive since deleted the tweet and spoken to them to apologize and clear up any hard feelings. so yeah lesson learned, if i ever have a thought about anything i should just shut the fuck up or talk about it privately. but for real ....like........... it is Not that serious. i didn't say anything particularly mean or hurtful. there are a ton of ppl who directly messaged and qrt'd the art saying way worse shit than i did so idk why im the one who got dogpiled like that lmao.

i think if i actually said something insulting or genuinely rude id be happy to apologize for it or wouldnt have said it in the first place. but yeah no shit i was being mean to the hundreds of people severely overreacting in my replies lol. i dont think i really owe anyone an explanation either other than the og artist, since they're the one actually affected by the situation, and i've already done that. so im moving on. this is a non-issue

#ectoasks #anon

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bixxelated · 1 year ago

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20 questions for fic writers

was tagged by @marypsue, thanks for the prompt!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

8 as of right now ;)

2. What’s your total word count?

132,629 on ao3

3. What fandoms do you write for?

uhh including WIPs right now im mostly writing for stranger things, which got the most fics in progress, but also legend of zelda (botw/totk specifically), jak and daxter, dangan ronpa (mainly dr1 and nvdr3)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

all these acts of violence> little red carp> these shadows you left behind> im supposed to take care of you> wavelength

5. Do you respond to comments?

i am Physically Incapable of Shutting Up About My Creations

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hm well for completed ones id have to say 'i'm supposed to take care of you', but including planned wips i dont know whether 'all these shadows' or 'wavelength' has more angst. theres also an ndrv3 fic in the works thats pretty downer

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i think Moonlight is pretty hopeful!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

nah, usually me and my writing keep to ourselves

9. Do you write smut?

yeah, once or twice

10. Do you write crossovers?

y'know i havent really dabbled much in crossovers!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nnooooot as far as im aware

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope! ive been meaning to translate some of them into spanish tho

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i tried a couple of times but it fell apart pretty quickly. dont think ill be trying again

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

iiiii do not have one because i really dont care that much about ships tbh. at least theres nothing that immediately comes to mind

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

hmmm well. little red carp was a fun fic to write but i dont see myself getting interested in it again

16. What are your writing strengths?

people tell me im very good at character voices and personality! which i appreciate! im also good at visualizing my stories and writing action scenes!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

planning! im always getting tripped up by how to get from point a to point b and i always get stuck with the details! its the worst!

but i cant exactly pants a story either bc im always thinking "oh what if i take the story THIS direction" and then i end up having to go back and rewrite a lot of sections

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

writing in spanish is veeery weird compared to writing in english. i cant get the grammar to cooperate with me as much, and it always makes me feel like a kindergartner trying to use words they just learned to cobble together their first story

i usually try not to bother translating for languages i don't know. or do some research first. mostly i rely on either not giving context or just writing what theyre really saying "in italics like this"

19. First fandom you wrote for?

uhhh. balto i think. as in the 1995 animated film balto. i was obsessed with that film

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

i think wavelength! just because of how much fun i am having thinking of the dynamics and Plot Things that are going to happen. a lot of it is a mishmash of what-ifs? and things i thought were going to happen in stranger things itself but didnt

i tag @mysterygreentea @sakurablossomcreamlatte @alzheimersparrotroute and anyone else interested in doing this

#blogger comments #tp #blogger writes fic

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nightmare-dreamt · 1 year ago

Note

Hey! I'm not 100% sure how to ask for a matchup, but I'm gonna try anyways, a3!, assassination classroom and ohshc If you can.

My name is Abby, and I'm an enfp and a virgo🙏

I tend to be on the more talkative side, I have a habit of rambling about an array of topics that end up making no sense because I switch stories halfway through, although I'm quiet when it comes to new people, around friends I'm physically incapable of shutting up.

I'm pretty disorganized, like really disorganized, but I can usually find what I'm looking for, it's kinda an organized chaos kinda thing, except it's not organized and I'm just good at remembering where I put stuff.

My hobbies include gardening, playing guitar (music is a big thing for me and my family), going on long walks with absolutely no destination, and cooking/baking.

I absolutely *hate* when people don't listen to what I have to say, which happens pretty often, dont know if people are tired of hearing me talk so much or if they never bothered listening to begin with, but its annoys me so much when someone asks me a question I've already answered, or don't pay attention to a story I'm telling.

I'm the oldest of four, two little sisters and a little brother, they're energetic to say the least, but I enjoy being around high energy people, I grew up with it, so it's what I'm comfortable with. People who are monotone all the time freak me out.

Heres just some random stuff I didnt know how to fit into an actual paragraph.

My favorite colour is blue

I *love* going out and doing things

I'm a pretty ambitious person, just not when it comes to school (it shows)

I'm big into flower language, my favorite are forget me nots.

Sorry if this is worded poorly or I forgot anything, I don't use the ask box often, or ask for matchups😭

Matchup for Abby!

A3!: Juza Hyodo

It was pretty akwards when the two of you first met, the two of you were both silent just staring at each other, waiting for someone to talk first. Once that encounter was over with though, things: changed the more you got to know him and know the type of person he is. You broke out of your shy shell and became a social butterfly, unlike him who was still fairly silent but he made sure to listen to everything that you said to him. He's more of the listener type than the speaker type,

For your guys first date together, he planned to make dinner for the two of you but he lost track of time and before he knew it you were inside his house with a sweet smile on your face. The two of you then began to cook together sharing laughter and smiles, enjoying the moment together. He was embarrassed at first when losing track of time and ruining the surprise, but when seeing the look on your face at the sight of being able to help cook with him, he would do anything to see that look again.

When he found out about your wide span of knowledge of flowers, he made sure to buy you flowers every time the two of you went out. He expects you to tell him about the flowers and share whatever knowledge you have about them. After a while of dating, he knows almost everything about flowers and knows which one is the best to get for a certain situation and how to tell what type of flowers to get someone. All thanks to his great s/o.

Assasination Classroom: Karma Akabane

Teasing is something we all know Karma does, and it's something he's not going to stop doing. especially for someone he likes. You were used to his playing and teasing though since all of it was light hearted and wasn't anything too extreme. His teasing is usually done to see a smile on your face, which will then bring a simile onto his face knowing he was able to make you happy.

Long Walks through the park or anywhere for that matter are a must with Karma. He enjoys going on them to clear his mind and to just listen to the soft sounds of nature around him. His favorite is the beach and being able to feel the sand and being able to hear the soft sounds of waves in the background.

When Karma first met your siblings, it was a quick friendship between them all. He made sure to be able to connect with all of them in a certain way that would make them approve of him and it worked. He's now the fan favorite of your household and your siblings always wonder when he's going to be coming back so they could talk and hang out with him. Everytime he comes over, he makes sure to spend a little bit of time with your siblings and do whatever they are in the mood for.

Host Club: Honey - Senpai

When he first heard you play the guitar, he fell in love, needing to hear it all the time. Everytime that he comes over, expect to be asked to play for him. He thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever heard and loves how skilled you are at it. Tells Mori all about it the next day and explain every detail of the song and the way your fingers strummed the chords perfectly.

Bakery Dates are a must in this relationship, I mean it's Honey-senpai, what did you expect from him? You guys go to all sorts of bakeries together and try different types of treats and meals together enjoying every single one of them. His favorite are bakeries that only have cake, you gusy spend so much money there it's shocking that you're not banned from the amount of cake Honey eats.

#x reader #anime #anime x reader #request #matchups #a3! x reader #a3! act addict actors #a3! juza #assasination classroom x reader #assination classroom #karma akabane #karma x reader #ouran high school host club #host club #honey senpai

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wench-and-jezebel · 2 years ago

Text

My Bloody Valentine (3D) Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

[Preemptive warning for gore, btw… I'm sure that's shocking]

Bloody gears, so scurry

DEAN

Jump scare

How. Did she. Not notice that sooner. [Define the that for the viewers please, dear] That the guy legit just wasn’t in his bed

WELL SHIT. DERSSS BEEN A MURDERRRRR. [THERE'S BEEN SEVERAL MY DEAR]

WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME ABOUT THE GORE?! [Ma’am.] Kiddingggg

Sweet lord. Blech

The acting tho ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [I've told you this; Jackles is, like, the only good actor in this (slight exaggeration but not much)] 🤣🤣🤣 Fair

Deannn [His name's Tom btw aksldjf]

Whooooa, Tom's voice… That caught me off guard [I KNOW RIGHT] Isss so soft [asfdkja;dslfkj This is true]

[Creepy mineshaft that just collapsed: OBVIOUSLY the best place for a party] Right?!

Oooooh jumpscare??

☠️

[Damn, I really should've warned you about the gore, huh?] Literally

But also. Wot. WAS THAT. You can tell this was a 3D movie ☠️☠️☠️

How’d he miss them

[“Jason” Wrong horror movie, bud] ☠️☠️☠️

Buddy. Don’t you see the bodies???

Runnnnn buddy

☠️☠️☠️ Well damn

Damn x2

Oh shit. ☠️☠️☠️☠️ blech

[And prepare yourself for some uncoolness btw] Uncoolness? [“Dean”'s friends] Oh. Oh shit. They just. Left him. Though, I mean, at least his girlfriend tried. [Yes, but she's 1/3] True. 2/3 suck. [asdkfjha;kdfsj Yeah]

Poor buddy [Abandoned with a serial killer]

Bad-buddy, the mask breathing is a giveaway

Freckles

Blood freckles

Bruh HARRY IS A BEAST [*to the dulcet sounds of Bachman-Turner Overdrive* You ain't seen nothing yet]

And at that moment he snapped [...] What? [Nothing.]

The lip trembleee thoooo 💕💕💕 *dissolves*

– – –

And here we paused because someone closed Safari. Not that I’m naming names, but it was Jezebel. Because obviously, if anyone were gonna close the film preemptively, it’d be she. (With all affection, my dear :) )

– – –

Wait, is that douche? From earlier? [Yes] Le gasp

Wait? Wait WAIT That hoe!!! 3/3 [I told you… uncoolness.] She ain’t loyal

I don’t even feel bad the guy’s gonna kill ‘em all [That’s what I’m SAYING]

[And btw... wait for itttt] GOOD! Thassss what she gets [tbf, you're right: there’s a poeticness to the fact that she’s being cheated on after abandoning Tom and moving on with the other dude]

I knew it. Haha. Ya screwed up buddy. She pregnant.

Bowleggedness at its finest [alskdjf] Even if that was the most pointless scene [LAKSJDF;LKASJFD] Imma squat and stare at spooky mine where all my trauma came from [Max-coded] ☠️

[This whole town pisses me off, btw]

Buddy can’t get a good dad. Including his irl one. [Wait till you see Devour…. Where his dad sucks AND is played by his irl dad]

[Pupper]

👀👀👀👀 Welp. [They're very. Enthusiastic.] Tiddies ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [It does get... more] ☠️☠️☠️☠️ I just…. It’s not like that. It’s nothing like that. ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

[I forgot how PTSD buddy is] 💕💕💕💕💕*sigh*

[That. Does not qualify as romantic btw]

Oh shit

OH SHIT

BITCH?! Why did you not shut the door?!!? CLEARLY SHES HAS NEVER SEEN A HORROR MOVIE

Come on, ma’am, you never hide under the bed [Hmmmmm, I wonder where she could beeeee]

Well damn poor lady. [Yup :(]

DAMN

THIS MOVIES FUCKING WILD 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 [I KNOW]

Hi 💕 *dissolves* [His smile is so cute tho] Oh my goooosh dawwww

Ok I’m not AS mad that she moved on. But still. [It still bothers me for a thing I can't say yet; talk about it at the end] Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh wait. Oh wait! Is the kid his? [I don't think so] Oh [It's been ten years… Kid's not ten, I don't think] I thought that was the thing you couldn’t say [Nope. You’ll see :)]

Yeah you shot him, but he did kinda just you know… WALK AWAY

OH SHIT, old man. [Did I mention this whole town pisses me off?]

“I didn’t kill those people.” Why tf are they blaming him? [Technically. Because the mine explosion is explained as being because he didn't do something he should've.] Ooooh [But AGAIN. Accidental explosion vs intentional homicide. Which is the bigger deal?] Ye. Not the same. Like. TF?! And like…. If buddy wanted to be doing the murders… he would have done it anyway. [AND Even if he initially started "to save air" (unclear), he then killed all the poor nurses and doctors and college kids. So that's not just. “necessity”]

Why you watching their "activities", sir? That’s not a murder. That’s. Intercourse. Buddy.

BUDDY YOURE CHEATING ON HER!!! YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE JEALOUS ABOUT HER STILL LIKING TOM.

[Buddy, you already regretted the last ten years of your life. Also, ma'am annoys me here btw. "How dare you need time and space away from the town that blamed you for blowing up a mine after the serial killer who almost killed you got shot in front of you after your friends abandoned you?!?!?"]

Buddy you’re always losing your way. It’s a character trait at this point.

Nahhhhh mines scuuuurrr me [Even without serial killers in them]

Ouch migraine

Okay, nope, that’s it. The way they look at each other. That was just tooooo much of a looking in the mirror moment. If Tom’s not the bad guy, I’ma riot.

The fecking squelch

[You realize how claustrophobic Tom must be tho?] Right!?!

Bruh. He was locked in the cage. I still think he did it (so how tf did he do that) but come on

“Cause you’re pretty and I love you” [Basically]

BRUH AXEL YOU ARE CHEATING ON HERRRRRR. [I KNOW. He’s so possessive and for why. He legit gives 0 shits]

I AM SO READY FOR HIM TO DIE. if he doesn’t I’m gonna be very angry

[This has gone well btw]

“Come on, wife I don’t care about but pretty boy can’t care about either”

Gahhhhhh I hate that douche is the cop. Ewwwww [!!!]

“Why would you want to sell the mine?” *2 seconds later* “Why would you want to stay?”

Ohh he struck a nerve [This poor dude has gotten punched, like, three times] ☠️☠️☠️

[I love his coat-hoodie combo thing alkasjfd]

“Or you” Poor ol buddy's like… why you say that to me

Yellow fever vibes [Yes]

[Did I mention that buddy is so claustrophobic and so PTSD that it's painful] I knowwwww

Why you look so shocked; you didn’t even close it

Ahhhhhh Blech

Why can’t douche just like die [alksdjf Maybe he will!]

Oh shit “We found Ben”

[I swear, they're all just like: Hmm, something went wrong. Blame Tom!]

Bruh this chick

Wait WOT. Ma'am, Axel was only there for you ‘cause you left Tom behind!??

[They have also never seen a horror movie]

Oh don’t hold your belly ma’am; you’re what, three days?

Beaten down with a Turkey leg

Oh shit Sarah die? [I say nothing]

“Yes, let me leave you alone”

All he’s thinking is “thanks Harry”

Oooop- She knowwws [I know she's saying Axel, but it sounded like asshole]

OH SHIT NOT THE KIDDDD

ME AS A COP! “Do I gotta go in?”

Welp cop You’re about to be retired from life too, ok?

Oh shiiiiiit

Ooooof

Good thing I’m not squeami— oh. Wait [I GAVE THE GORE WARNING]

[Ooh, the salt in the wound tho. "She left with that nice Tom Hanniger"]

Theeeeee CGI

[Ma'am, Axel almost slammed you into a desk; how is him being violent impossible?] ☠️☠️☠️☠️

They didn’t handle this storyline well. I hate that the guy who got the short end of the stick the whole movie is the bad guy [FINALLY SOMEONE GETS IT. Also… That end just got shorter btw] ☹️☹️ [The screams thoooo]

Ewww Axel’s vengeance face

She gon kill axel and then it’s not him

☠️☠️☠️ Poetic

Bitch. Why. The mines. Of all places. To hide. From a psycho miner dude.

Poor Sarah

Oooop- Buddy messed up

Poor buddy lost it

Like…. [While you type, lemme just say how much I hate how Axel's immediate response is "I knew it"] What pisses me offf is axel doesn’t even care about any of it. Just that he was right. [SBC, but I wish it weren’t] Like this isn’t about justice for the dead people. It’s ohhhhh I don’t like you and you ended up being the bad guy. This is what I mean with they handled it bad. [Definitely agree. We’ll talk more at endpoint reaction.]

[That went well] That went boom

Bruh. He just doesn’t die

Ew; no one cares about yall’s love. [HE WAS CHEATING ON HER A DAY AGO]

🙂 He lives

That look

– – –

Endpoint Reaction:

Jezebel: Instead of Axel being the jealous whatever-he-was, he should have been Tom’s best friend. They leave ‘cause they think the guy’s killed him. And then get together because he disappears. Even if the cheating still happens, it takes away that the “bad guy gets the girl and the good guy’s the bad guy” taste. That alone would have made it a little easier to watch and made it to where you could be happy they get away.

Wench: Agreed

Jezebel: Because the way it’s handled almost feels like this whole movie victim-blamed Tom into insanity and thus turned him into the thing he tried to get them to see he wasn’t. Also the whole “he was in an asylum” thing seemed so “we gotta explain why he’s got this split personality” so they threw it in, when they could have I dunno showed it in a two minute clip

Wench: Yeah

Jezebel: But the gore was 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 hard to watch but made it scary enough in that sense. And there was a full on nekked woman running around. It wasn’t horrible! But yeah. It’s up there with Friday the 13th on killers I side with

Wench: So, you know I have a fondness for this film. But it's very much a "I know it's not good and watch anyway" kind of fondness, mixed with the tastes that leads people to watch, for example... revenge stories. I recognize that Tom's the "bad guy" of the film, and I also recognize that some of the people he killed weren't people who deserved it. But I also can't stop myself from rooting for him, and that --- the fact that he makes it to the end, for example --- is a large part of the fondness. It's like Law Abiding Citizen, where the "bad guy" is nonetheless the one you root for.

Jezebel: LAW ABIDING CITIZEN OOOOOH I LOVE THAT ONEEEE

Wench: Yesss

Also Wench: But it also pisses me off because of a number of things (some of which you covered). If the town as a whole --- his alleged friends, family, partners, etc --- had bothered to check in with him instead of villainizing him, the entire movie (or, at least, all but the first ten minutes) might not have happened. He didn't leave out of the blue, and it's stupid that they act like he did. He left because, in close proximity: a) the entire town turned against him for a mistake --- a costly mistake, sure, but nonetheless, an accident --- that they apparently ranked as on-par with the serial-killing miner who slaughtered a whole hospital and a college party of some kind, b) said miner tried to kill him, c) his friends left him behind for said miner to kill him, and then d) said miner got shot in front of him at extremely close quarters. Buddy didn't leave for the fun of it; buddy was confined to a mental institution because he had some combination of a mental breakdown and/or a dissociative identity split. To the point that he's still chugging meds in the movie and showing signs of both PTSD and a related panic disorder of some kind (at least to my amateur eyes)

Jezebel: Right!!?! Any of those alone would cause a person to snap!

Wench: Axel isn't a good guy, and he's not even a flawed hero. He's an outright asshole. He acts completely out of jealousy, marries a woman simply because he'd been envious of her and Tom's previous relationship but now Tom wasn't in his way, cheats on her despite them having a son together, and is controlling and possessive to a dangerous level at all times.

Jezebel: 100% agree with it all!

Wench: Actually, I just realized a thing. If you take this story. And put it in slightly different terms. You get:

There's a group of friends. This group includes Friend 1, who is in a relationship with Friend 2, and Friend 3. Friend 3 is jealous of the relationship between Friend 1 and 2.

Through some combination of Friend 3's actions and an external entity, Friend 1 is removed from the equation.

Friend 3 uses this as an opportunity to fulfill the jealousy and start a relationship with Friend 2

Friend 1, meanwhile, gets incarcerated somewhere for a great many years, with better or worse periods of sanity/lucidity, before getting out and going back to hometown

Friend 2 and Friend 3's relationship has soured, since the jealousy didn't last past the initial pursuit success

Friend 1 slowly but surely takes revenge against various people in hometown

And that’s the story of The Count of Monte Cristo.

Jezebel: Ooh! I gotta say, I was so lost at first.

Wench: The point is: The Count is the protagonist of the story, and, while he’s not a pure “good guy,” he’s definitely the best of the initial characters (e.g. pre-Chateau D’If). So, yeah, the terms change a bit with the many murders of this film, as well as the fact that not everyone harmed by Tom was problematic, but, in terms solely of character archetypes, plotlines, etc… Tom is “the good guy” of the story. And he got, as you put it, the short end of the stick for the entire plot. He deserved to not have it happen again, instead of having the blame of the entire town actually portrayed as “deserved.”

Jezebel: Side-tracking a bit because: Another thing is it, would have been better to have the killer actually be Axel or one of the older men, or even the girl. Or the other cop. It being Tom just 😮‍💨😮‍💨 it but a bad taste in my mouth (I think I already said this lol but it did). But also it being Tom would have had a poeticness about it under different circumstances, if he wasn’t already painted as h the villain. Like, maybe axel thought it was him but the rest of the town was like “tommy?! Our boy!? Nooooo way” Then it being him would have been like “TOMMY?! NO WAY!! MY BOY!”

Wench: Yeah, that’s fair… When I first watched the film, I knew they were going to make Tom the bad guy ahead of time, but I still wanted him to be right that it was Axel instead. Anything else to add?

Jezebel: Nope! Just that it was a’ight! And Ackles was *chef’s kiss* as always

#my bloody valentine #reactions #horror movie reactions #horror #horror movies #tom hanniger #jensen ackles #jezebel (pr)

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mollyflipssss · 4 months ago

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RANDOM EVENT *TLDR* creepy dude in roblox was sexual to everyone in the server including me, was the school principal, and insulted me when i tried to point out his repeated weird behavior to a group.

Some dude in roblox came up to me when i was sitting and started to yknow what to me and i was like WOAH!! but also was on my phone... so i ran into a corner... and HE KEPT GOING. i was like wtf cuz he literally verbally said "oh you like it in the corner." EW WTF. im so grossed out atp and wanna leave, but stay because i lent some girl my gear and id like her to enjoy it. plus there was a field trip in the game they organized coming up, and i love those!!! so whatever. fuck this weirdo, i thought thatd be it.

I overlooked the fact this man is a principal. and he stays in this game for far too long. and he sexually approaches person, after person, after person. and bitch atp i was like is he mentally there??? ANYWAY bro so everything was chill for a while and i was hanging out with a group of people who were decent, and then who walks up? a woman.

This woman though is actually the principal. And none of us realize, until they then change their avatar and people investigate their profile. He then asked the students if they wanted private lessons. I was like oh my god his behavior never ends, so I typed in chat "oh this guy again, hes weird." because that is facts. He comes up to me fuming immediately. Keep in mind, I was across the ways from him stood on a wall. He knew I was talking about him even though I had recently just came back.

The man calls me a pick me, he tells me to shut the fuck up, he says im just trying to get attention, just berating me with insults. I couldnt comprehend everything he said cuz it was so sudden, but I know he said more, and after that I was like .... ok. I just left bro. How do I talk to a man who doesn't respect people?? In a game where you AREN'T ALLOWED to be sexual, he does, continuously. And is such a disgusting way. I have him blocked now and I hope to never encounter this disgusting person again. I shouldn't have to explain, but IN A GAME WHERE THERE ARE CHILDREN... you shouldn't behave that way. Its like hes lost the plot of whats funny. Its not funny to make weird disgusting comments in voice chat while you do these things. The things he said is really what im trying to outline as what irked me.

OK BAI ILY IF U READ THIS its so stupid it doesnt bother me much its just so gross and you know, after playing the game so much you see this same type of man over and over again. i just thought the way this happened was totally unprovoked, since i didnt outright say this without witnessing some odd shit first.

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trickinabucket · 4 months ago

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Feelings dump (but in a self reflective, positive way; there is mention of suicide tho)

I wanna put this here jic its something i wanna talk to my therapist abt.

This morning I just couldnt stop crying bc i just can't stop thinking of myself as a burden.

That if I had some grave illness I'd immediately ask to be put out of my misery. Whether the misery would come from the illness itself or something else wouldn't matter.

[sad rant]

And that led me down a path of guilt and anger. And wondering if I would even bother telling anyone about the decision. Something about it either being manipulation (for people I loved), or useless and painful for everyone (for my family, that I've completely given up on.)

And how I dont know what to tell my mother that wouldnt make me feel like I'm gonna make her think I'm guilt tripping her. But really wanting to tell her that I meant it when I said I was sorry about how I messed up college and everything I ever did to piss her off, and she still kept driving like she didnt care if she killed us both and I just felt rejected again. And that I stopped telling her things because I knew she would think I was too young to be depressed. And that I felt scared all the time and I didn't know why. I didn't want her to think I was being annoying if I asked for something twice, including the times I was actively asking for comfort or taking her for her word when she told me to wait my turn. That I wouldn't be forgotten. And that even the times I cried in front of her and felt like a child when she told me to stop trying to get attention, I cried more times when she was out of earshot, and considered many times hiding in the closet when I did it so that I wouldn't get caught. And I didn't mean this in any way to tell her she failed, but instead, tell her why I acted the way I did, and even if she really wanted another chance (and that truly would have been the last time she made that mistake), I just couldnt keep giving her chances anymore, because my heart just couldn't take the rejection anymore. It hurt so fucking much and I just wanted to forget.

[/sad rant]

And all of that, and I stopped crying. I stopped thinking about that, and really thought about me crying in a different scope. From one thing I said. That I tried not to cry around her and make her angry, and to just suck it up that I was hurting and had no word for it. That I was just severely backed up. And for years, I would cry and be angry at myself for doing it, because it was over, and far away, and it couldn't hurt me anymore. And I felt like I'd been crying for years and just sick of it.

I would hide when I cried. I would try not to cry, when I was a kid and had the fear and uncertainty. Now it just feels like I cry all the time, and of course it would when I used to stop myself from doing it. I feel small and helpless as a child when I cry, because that kid who existed back then gets to cry now. And just telling her to suck it up was just doing the same thing my mother was doing to me. No one should be ashamed to cry in front of their mother, or to show they're in distress and worry about whether it's the time or place to "get" to feel distressed.

We get to cry, because the threat is gone, and that's what we were programmed to do. I shouldn't feel annoyed at her and uneasy because of her, because no one's coming to make her shut up Or Else They'll Hear Me. I have a mouth and I can scream. So can she.

Even with Ed around, I'm free to, and sometimes I can even ask them to hold me if it's too much.

The headaches are a pain, but I need to drink more water anyway.

#more parts work #suicidal ideation

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cherrybloodkei · 3 years ago

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i made fakemons for my brother, they are my beloved. they are also round like football. i kick them really high :)

#at first their name waas supposed to be spoy and floyo but i made slight arrangements #by that i mean my brother was half asleep when he pitched thoses name so i didnt bother and named them somehting simple that sounded similar #btw like i know how pokemon are shaded..... but also i dont know. its like i cant do it for some reason so i just did some simple shading #i forgor to include but sponion is grass and flonion is grass/flying #btw my brothers favorite pokemon are oddish and hoppip so thats the look i was going for #btw i spawned flonion from a fakemon generator... i might draw more of these--#shut up kei #fakemon #onion #round boy #my art #pokemon #fake pokemon

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i-cant-sing · 3 years ago

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SIS I JUST FOUND UR JJK BLOG AND I REALLY FREAKIN LOVE IT! ESPECIALLY NAOYA WITH BABY FUSHIGURO! THEY’RE SO ADORABLE 😭 THEY MAKE MY HEART GO 💥 💥 💥

like what would naoya’s reaction be if he finds baby fushiguro getting bullied by some random kids (at a park or sum) for being weird? Or just like so energetic?

As the proud creator of Fushiguro reader, the feelings mutual babe. I love baby fushiguro and I love how much chaos she causes, especially when she becomes a pain in the ass for Naoya.

Now, Naoya would rarely ever let you out of the house. And when he does, its usually with a small army of servants.

You had recently been begging to go to the park, and since you'd been behaving and not tried to eat the ancestor's ashes for over 2 weeks, Naoya allowed you to go the park with servants.

But instead of lifting your mood, it seemed that you came home sadder. He asked the servants what's bothering you, but they just shrugged and said that its probably because the other kids wont play with you.

So, one day, Naoya decided to accompany you to see for himself, and make sure that it wasn't the servants who had been hurting you or something.

You were super giddy at the idea of your uncle going to the park to play with you, he'd even brought a football!

Naoya watched you try to dribble the ball away from him, giggling as Naoya actually struggled to get it out of your feet. Suddenly, he managed to kick the ball and it flew over to the other side where slides and swings were. He watched you run towards it to fetch it, but he turned worried when you didnt return after a few minutes, which considering how fast you zoomed was concerning.

Naoya ran over to where'd you went and saw you on the ground, crying as a boy pulled on your ponytail with one hand and held your football in the other.

"Its mine!" He yelled, tugging at your hair harder making you cry out in pain.

Naoya was quick to push the boy away from you, picking you up as he glared at the boy with murderous intent.

The boy cowered a bit, but still stood his ground. "Who are you, jerk?!" He asked Naoya, puffing his chest up to show he wasnt afraid.

"Shut-"

"You're not her dad! She doesn't have one. She doesn't even have a mom!" Naoya's eyes widened with rage, but he felt you still in his arms at the boy's words.

Before Naoya could beat some manners into the little brat, you hugged him tighter and whispered that you wanted to go home right now.

Upon hearing your heartbroken voice, Naoya obliged, letting the little brat run away while he walked back to the car, ordering the driver to drive them home. He held you against his chest all the way, only pulling you away to tend to the little scrap on your knee. You'd soon fallen asleep and Naoya stayed right by your side as he called one of the servants and had him pull information on the misbehaving child in the park.

Turns out, the two of you used to go to the same school back when you were with Toji. The boy had many complains of bullying other kids, including you. Back then, he would bully you for not having a mother and since Toji was always so busy being undercover on missions, he rarely ever appeared in front of the public, let alone your friends.

It didn't take much for Naoya to put two and two together. The little bastard must've seen you at the park, spread some rumours about you so the other kids wouldn't befriend you and then he had the nerve to go ahead and hurt you physically today. But perhaps it was his words that hurt you more because you must be wondering where either of your parents are- something that'd plant little seeds of insecurities in your mind.

Still though, that brat had no right to upset you.

"You." He called the servant again. "Do we still have curses trapped in the basement?"

The servant nodded. "Yes, Master Naoya. Shall I prepare them for you to duel?"

Naoya shook his head. "No. I want you to pick a small one, the one Y/n was chasing after last week." He rolled his eyes as he remembered how you wanted to befriend the one eyed, fire breathing curse. Naoya looked at the servant before pushing the file on the bully towards him. "Release that one at his house, will ya?" The servant bowed before leaving, while Naoya smiled and kissed your forehead before lying down next to you to sleep.

The curse won't kill him, not really. Just cause him pain here and there and at worst, drive him to insanity.

Naoya rolled his eyes. Nothing the little shit didn't deserve.

He brushed the hair out of your face before pulling the cover upto your face.

Just because Toji isn't around, doesn't mean he wont step up to take his position for you.

I'll do anything for you, my little princess. Anything.

Man, I've been posting way too much these past two days, no?

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cynettic · 3 years ago

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hi, i hope i'm not bothering you, but i can order a Scaramouche × Kitsune reader, the two met before the vision hunt (and before he was a fatui if you want) the reader was always in the same place, sometimes having a conversation , the good old routine, but with the hunting of visions the reader disappeared not wanting to give up his own vision, and years later a reunion, SFW or NSFW is by your will, thank you, I really admire your work

Summary - Scaramouche met you as a child, growing up with the constant assurance that you would be right there, sitting at your spot where he could meet you with every visit. He isn't happy when you suddenly disappear.

Pairing - Kitsune!Reader x Yan!Scaramouche

Warning - Slight Yandere warnings?

Penpal - Ahhh- hope this is what you were looking for. I couldn't find a spot to put much nsfw unless I considered writing more for the series ( I could, just put a request in if thats what you’re looking for ). But I hope you liked it!! You're not bothering me at all and I'm glad you like my work!

A/N - Alright- so considering that with the 2.1 update with Scaramouche coming in, I just wanna state beforehand that I wrote this prior so I dont know if we learn about his backstory or anything!!

Link for Part 2

Stay With Me

Scaramouche was used to the routine he’d found himself going along with every visit to Inazuma. As a child he’d pass through the wild fields that stretched just beside his hometown, adventurous and curious with all the tenacity of a child.

And of course you, a kitsune that sat perched on the ground awaiting the Kitsune Saiguu, was bound to notice him. Unlike the other earth kitsune statues, you hadnt turned to stone during your wait. Instead, staying in the same place did you interact with travellers and the locals, which included Scaramouche.

“Fox person!” The little boy chanted, pulling at the hems of your clothing. Bright blue eyes bore into your own, and you slowly shifted your head to pay attention to the boy who was on the verge of bouncing on you.

Humming in reply to his excitement, the little boy paused, both of his small hands still tightly clasping the fabric of your clothes. Soft matted hair brushed past his face in a messy manner, calling out the boy for his boundless running and rebellious urge to keep his hair messy despite his parents wishes.

“Play with me!”

Staring at the boy only a moment longer, you simply chuckled at his antics. “I’m afraid I cannot move from the spot in which I dwell~ Perhaps I’ll be able to entertain you if you bring cards?”

But the young boy had made up his mind at the statement to which you couldn't move. A pitiful frown enfluged his face as he cast you the nastiest glare a five year old could muster. “Boring!” He shouted into the distance of the fields, dramatically turning on his heels and bouncing up into a sprint away. You watched his small figure fade away into the background, absentmindedly sighing and returning to your mindless thoughts.

As a child, Scaramouche would pass by you fairly often. Frequent when he asked you to play with him, and storming away with the same expression when you denied him. Nothing out of the ordinary, you’d lived for an exceptional amount of time, and even though grumpy children were not your specialty, you’d grown accustomed to their behaviour.

Growing up, Scaramouche got no better. You soon noticed his violent tendencies before they became an issue, the way the children shied away from him when playing Temari. Hiding in front of a tough exterior, he scared them away and laughed, approaching you later with tearful sob.

“Will you play with me?” He asked again, trying to hide the fact that he still wept when the other children pushed him away.

But your answer stayed the same, helping him wipe his tears and coaxing him into your arms. Not the first time you’d made contact with a human, but the first time you held them in such an affectionate manner.

It was clear Scaramouche was beginning to see you as some sort of pillar of reassurance when he began running away from home to simply ask to be held. You always welcomed him with open arms, urging him to head back to his household and sort things out. There was no harm in simply providing love and comfort for a child who received none was there?

“Now now, hurry back home little one. Your parents must be growing awfully worried if you’re out by this time at night.”

“My parents dont care about me!”

Darkness slowly pooled into the fields, an obscure shade covering the two of you from the tree you were under. Biting back form your normal emotionless statements, you pondered for something to soothe and convince the boy. Misunderstandings and hardships were normal from what youd seen with children, and you could only offer your hand on his shoulder, a promise. “Go back, I promise to stay here if anything further happens. But you shold give them another chance dont you think?”

And so he’d sprint back to his hometown, and you wouldnt hear from him again till he ran up right up to you a few days later. Begging you to play a game with him. The normal you supposed, and with a grin that seemed to stretch wider with every day, you told him the same thing you told him every single time.

“You cant move?!” Scaramouche nearly yelled one time, tiny fists curling at his side. “Thats… thats stupid!”

“It is isnt it?” You only smiled in response.

Unsatisfied with your response, he clawed your arm, pulling you with all his might. Strong, you realized with surprise that he was much stronger than most children his age. Easy enough to tug away from, but strong enough to take you off guard.

Snapping your hand back to your side, you narrowed your eyes. You weren't angry… no, you hadnt felt strong feelings like that after the disappearance of the Kitsune Saiguu. “Do not attempt to move me,” was your curt response, said in the most stern voice you’d used with the boy.

He’d looked at you only a few seconds longer before bursting into tears, turning away and running. You didn't feel regretful for defending yourself, only turning once more with a tired sigh to stare at the distance.

But just as you stayed ageless, Scaramouche grew older. Still, crossing each others pass was inevitable when you sat in the plains, just alongside the path that lead to his hometown.

With a permanent scowl that seemed to stain his face, he still seemed to have mature a tad bit. Maybe hadnt improved in the social department, because he now scared children and adults and alike, but more mature…

“Hm? Whats this?”

Once again, sitting criss cross under the large tree that provided the perfect shade on sunny days, you stared at the boy expectantly. His hands hesitated at your question, but he resumed shuffling. “Cards,” he simply said in response.

A small featherlike feeling flitted across your chest, making you feel lighter and… almost ticklish. A small smile crossed your face, and you recognized the emotion to be one of adoration. For him to have remembered words you’d spoken years ago, it gave you a warmth you’d sorely missed. A warmth akin to watching him and the other children grow up.

“Ew, dont smile like that, its creepy.”

Swatting at his head, he frowned further when you laughed. “You’re more mature,” you pointed out, lazily leaning back. “You need to work on your people skills though, as someone who hasnt moved in years, thats pitiful that I know more than you.”

“Shut it!”

But as he grew up, you hardly got to see much of him. He’d reached your height and then fully disappeared, leaving no goodbye. And much as you hated to admit it, you hardly noticed, not when days passed in a flurry. You were used to being by yourself, entertaining the kids and greeting the people that passed by.

Sometimes, there’d be the reminder of the warmth he’d given you. But it was quickly overshadowed by your duty to remain seated in wait for the Kitsune Saiguu. A dedication kept in its earnest, but beginning to dwindle.

Inazuma was beginning to change.

“The vision decree…” you repeated, staring at the traveller who’d mentioned it to you. “Care to elaborate?”

The new archon threatenening to take away visions from every inhabitant of Inazuma. It was preposterous, so much that you didnt move. Your vision meant the world to you, but so did the Kitsune Saiguu. You werent sure just how you weighed the two till you saw civilians passing by you, ones you recognized, ones that didnt recognize themselves.

It was snowing, cold snowflakes melting into your skin while your hair soaked in the water. Unflinching, you hummed to a little tune, awaiting someone to pass you so that you could attempt to strike a conversation of somesort. The unnatural weather distanced all who entered the field though, and you simply waited. For the Kitsune Saiguu, for someone, or for some form of entertainment, you didnt know. You Slowly closing your eyes, you decided not to care.

“Im gone for five years and you’re still sitting here like a dumbass.”

Eyes snapping open, you find yourself face to face with a complete stranger. Dark purple hair with dark blue eyes, piercing and dangerous in a way you dont recognize at all. Fancy clothing that you cant identify or put a name on.

The boy took a step towards you, crouching down to stare at you directly. His eyes scanned over your figure briefly, and he brushed the snow out of your hair and ears with one flick of his hand. In the next, he was offering a coat to you. “Take it, you’re probably getting cold.”

You leaned forward, ignoring the coat he offered you. Gently, you raised your hand to brush the hair from his eyes, centred on the way his pupils widened. Offering a small moment of surprise and one glimpse into the small childlike blue eyed wonder he was. “Kiddo,” you breathed, pulling your hand back and scanning him once again. “You’ve grown.”

“And you havent.”

Snickering at his comment, you took the coat. You didnt need it, but he looked like he didnt either. He was already wearing clothing that kept him warm, and with careful observation and an untouched coat, you settled on the fact that he’d brought it here. Brought the coat here for you.

“Still havent improved with those social skills of yours have you?”

He scoffed, letting himself fall back till he was sitting fully. “I dont want to hear it from someone who refuses to move an inch for years. Lazy ass.”

You open your mouth to retort, but instead laugh at his comment, shaking your head. “Gained some humour on your journeys have you? Bad words too it seems. Anyways...” He had sat down, which meant that he meant fully well to sit, chat, and catch up. That familiar warmth filled your chest, a contrast between the cold snow. “Welcome back.”

It wasnt often that Scaramouche visited Inazuma, but when he did, he was sure to visit you. The two of you would sit down for hours, talking about the most trivial topics. He never mentioned what he did in his time away, and you never asked.

But things began to go downhill when news of the vision decree finally took action.

“Its no joke anymore! The Raiden Shogun has taken custody of almost a hundred visions!”

In that moment you made your decision, weighing your vision over the Kitsune Saiguu. Awfully selfish you knew, but you’d spent decades sitting there in wait.

And for the first time you sat up from your position on the ground, clumsily stumbling upright but gaining balance. It takes a few steps until you’re back to normal, and you begin your journey in order to escape the Raiden Shogun’s vision hunt decree.

_-_-_-_

You didnt expect to see him again.

Long grass tickled at the skin of your legs, making you adjust your footing to no avail. Sun slowly descending past the mountains to mark the start of an evening and the soon approaching night. A normal day of exploring the mountains and islands of Inazuma, observing the constant changing situation, and running away from the vision decree like a favourite past-time.

With the exception of a firm grip on your wrist.

Dark purple like hair, same hate brimmed eyes and lavish clothing. You recognized Scaramouche the moment he had appeared, looking just as surprised as you were. That being before he snatched your wrist and snarled, “You.”

You wouldve considered it pure luck to find him, an unexpected reunion with someone you actually remembered. But no, his tone had some predatorial edge to it that had you cringing. Hard. “Yes, its me.” You answered back with a frown, trying to loosen his hold. “Nice to see you too, is something the matter?”

He only seemed confused at your words, pulling you closer.

“Something the matter?” He asked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Well, to start, you’re not sitting at your damn spot.”

Taken aback for a moment, you wondered if that sole fact was what drove the boy to such lengths. Surely he couldn't be so troubled over the fact that you moved… “The vision hunt decree, I'm sure I mentioned that I was sticking around in wait for the Kitsune Saiguu. I decided to wander around and avoid the conflict until I could settle back.”

“You could’ve waited for me,” he stated almost instantly. “I could have protected you.”

You felt your brows furrow quizzically. “Wait for you? Why in the world would I-”

“Why wouldn't I?” He pushed you closer till he could fully grab both wrists, taking a step closer as if his words would resonate clearer in your head. “You took care of me as a child, it would only be fair for me to repay the favour.” But he only seemed to be looking for excuses. “And besides, you can't just up and leave… I didn't know.”

Before you could interject with the obvious answer that he didn't need to know, you stopped. You’d lived decades, nearly centuries if you’d kept count, and you had learned to read people's expressions even when you’d stayed away from them for so long. He didn't know. It hit you in the most unpleasant way that he wasn't aware that it was none of his concern. To him, you were just another thing he needed to keep track of, something he had control over. His face basically screamed, ‘I depended on you to stay in that place.’

Deep breath in and out. You’d lived long, longer than him, you could deal with a child throwing a tantrum.

“Don't worry,” you gestured to the vision ta your side. “I'm strong enough to protect myself, I appreciate your concern, but I’ll be back when the vision decree ends.”

Unconvinced, he pulled you closer, just until your faces were mere inches away from each other. “No,” he said in a stern voice. “I’d rather you by my side, where I can protect you. I hate to question what you’re capable of, but you’ve been sitting down for as long as I’ve known you for.”

“I’ve lived decades more than you,” a simple reply, hopefully enough to get by him. You snatched your hands back with ease, ears flinching slightly when a cold breeze swept past you. But you stayed firm, not wanting to look vulnerable against the imposing air he had around him.

Still unconvinced. “You’re coming with me.”

“No I’m not.”

You’d known him as a kid, watched him grow up along with all the other small ones in his hometown. And maybe you admit you cared a smudge bit about the warmth he gave you when settling down to play cards, but he was different. He had changed in the worst way and you weren't about to deal with it.

“So you’re not coming with me voluntarily?” He asked softly, taking a small step to which you responded by stepping back. He had his hands up, as if telling you he wouldn't hurt you. But the way he said voluntarily sent shivers up your spine.

“No.” Hand on your vision, you held your own hand up threateningly.

He took his time when tilting his head, taking a deep breath in, and then appearing in front of you in just a short stride. Too quick to react, you hesitated before you could attack him. You didn't want to hurt him, he was still a child in your eyes, and you paid the consequences for that. He slid his hand just along your neck, and a jolt of electricity seemed to thrum inside you just as you collapsed in his arms.

Scaramouche was quick to catch you, hoisting you up into his arms dearly. “I do hope you’ll come to understand,” he said softly, cradling your unconscious form in his arms. Making sure not to crush your tail when carrying your legs, he looked past the mountains, sigh resting on his lips.

Because Scaramouche liked to have control of the things he held dear. Like keeping all your valuables neat and tidy in a closet, he was happy knowing you were safe and stable in that spot you always sat on.

And he couldn't have you moving could he?

#genshin impact #genshin headcanons #genshin oneshot #genshin fanfic #genshin scaramouche #genshin scaramouche x reader #scaramouche x reader #genshin impact x reader #cynshealthysfw #genshin fluff

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