#i didn't even realize it was so long
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So true lmao😭
#11 minute long monologue#i didn't even realize it was so long#enough time to call Jack or I dunno#an ambulance#such shitty writing#spn 15x20#supernatural
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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.
We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.
Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.
He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?
I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?
#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim#time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its#slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis#he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing#hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an#thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit#in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t#talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap#not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire#idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing
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woke up from a dead sleep last night realizing I could make soroku flavored pitch pearl and no one could stop me
edit: you know what? I'm feral and I won't apologize. more under the cut bc this is my house
I slammed this out all at once so I apologize for the quality but I'm having EMOTIONS
so imagine. bc of the way Danny was quickly resuscitated, his ghost only barely started forming. With the excess blast of ectoplasm from the portal being created, that little whisp was given form even after Danny's soul returned to his body.
except this ghost (Phantom) slowly comes into consciousness while trapped in Danny's body. they're separate entities sharing one body, but Phantom doesn't really have a sense of self right away. he pieces together vague fragments of Danny's memory to get a basic understanding of the world, and is mostly just observing like a backseat passenger.
Phantom starts reflexively protecting Danny, his powers and instincts bleeding through when his emotions are high. Danny doesn't really transform, and his personality doesn't totally shift that much at first because Phantom’s mind isn't complex yet. but as time goes on, and Danny has tense conversations with ghosts, Phantom realizes that's what he is. he's a ghost, somehow trapped in his old body. and even now, this early on, he already feels separate. he doesn't have all the memories Danny has.
this slowly turns into horror. into rage. sorrow, mourning a life he never got and will never get to have. forever trapped behind the eyes of someone else, never able to interact with the world. Phantom's rage eventually boils over until it allows him short bursts of taking over Danny's body. it starts out small–a stray hand moving without his consent, knees locking up, ghost abilities going awry. Danny can start feeling emotions that don't belong to him. get vague impressions, almost hears a voice inside him.
and eventually, Phantom is able to fully take over. this is when Danny “transforms". at first, Danny blacks out because his consciousness isn't used to being shoved into the back seat. but eventually, he's awake for these “episodes", trapped in the back of his mind while Phantom controls his body. this only happens when ghost stuff is happening, when Phantom feels threatened enough. he's not protecting Danny, he's protecting himself. Phantom knows instinctively that if Danny dies, he dies too. he's not a normal ghost, he wouldn't be freed. he'd simply disappear.
at one point after a fight, Phantom can feel Danny struggling to take back control. and he talks to Danny for the first time, acknowledges he's there. asks how it's fair that Danny is the one that gets to exist. but Phantom is tired and weak, he slips back into the passenger seat.
over the next few days, he's able to start talking to Danny even while he's not driving. though he's not chatty, it's only when necessary. and Danny knows, can feel it across the link between them–Phantom hates him. the ghost he created is desperate to find a way to take over completely. and as time goes on, Danny realizes with horror that it might actually be possible for Phantom to do that. he grows stronger every day, can stay transformed longer, controls Danny's body with much more ease.
it's only through a chance meeting with Frostbite that Danny and Phantom fully learn what happened to them. Danny feels sympathetic towards Phantom now. this isn't a malevolent ghost, it's a person who was never given the chance to live. who's trapped. who has to watch someone else live a life they're just as deserving of.
and Phantom feels that emotion from Danny. is so shocked by it, he doesn't know how to handle it at first. it takes him a while to contemplate, to talk to other ghosts like Frostbite. until one day, Phantom realizes… he feels sympathy for Danny, too.
neither of them asked for this. both of them deserve to live. Danny didn't do anything wrong. they're both villains to each other's story. and if anything… doesn't Phantom owe his life to Danny in the first place?
Phantom takes over less often. Danny doesn't feel hatred from him anymore. anger, yes–but not aimed at him. in fact, Phantom starts controlling their body in little ways in order to protect Danny from things that aren't even dangerous. just to avoid pain that would only affect the human tethered to him.
it isn't long before they're separated, either thanks to another ghost or Danny's parents. they're thrown apart in the middle of a horrific fight, and when Danny sees Phantom's equally shocked expression, he's terrified.
this ghost that hated him for so long–at best, Phantom would leave him defenseless. at worst, surely some part of Phantom still wants to kill him for stealing away his chance for autonomy.
and yet, when fire rains down on them, Phantom risks it all to grab Danny and get them both to safety. they're still both shaken and stunned this is even happening, but Phantom is able to nervously be like shit shit shit okay stay here don't go anywhere or I can't protect you, okay?
after the fight is over and dust settles, Phantom offers Danny his hand. they stare at each other and god if this isn't the weirdest thing. like, uh, okay, what now? they decide to go see Frostbite, who confirms that they're fully separate now. they ask if there's any chance of merging again and Frostbite assures it's impossible.
Phantom asks, even if I overshadowed Danny? or stay real close? yes, it's nothing to worry about. they leave, and back in the quiet of Danny's room, they talk. Phantom isn't sure what to do. now that opportunity is in front of him, he feels paralyzed. Danny does his best to let Phantom know that… they might be separate now, but if he ever wants help or even just a friendly ear, he's here for him.
Phantom is quiet for a while. then says maybe he just needs to rest first. he'll think about it tomorrow. they're both exhausted and injured. Phantom asks quietly… if he could rest in Danny for the night.
Danny's shocked, and–really confused. Phantom blushes and is like I don't know what my haunt is yet, I don't know where to go, but I know… you're kind of my home. now that I know I can leave whenever I want, it's not something bad anymore. I miss feeling your heart next to my core, just a little bit.
and Danny is just as surprised when Phantom overshadows him, then quietly nestles into the passenger seat again. he didn't realize how he got used to feeling Phantom with him. it's a feedback loop of contentedness, and Danny sleeps easily. (they also find out while sharing a body, Danny gets to reap the benefits of Phantom's supernatural healing)
anyway that's all I got for now thank u for coming to my ted talk
#I'll be honest. it has interested me. I've read fics. I'm just more interested in other stuff for dp#but the prospect of pitch pearl 'enemies to friends also maybe they kiss about it' has me sweating nervously#the struggle and angst of defining yourself against your progenitor. the defiant sorrowful anger funneled into misplaced hatred#only to slowly realize your progenitor is a sweet person who didn't condemn you. they even fight for you to have your own agency#so once you finally have your own body you'll do anything to protect that person you've come to truly care about#and because you shared a body for so long. because you had the same origin. you know them as well as you know yourself#you're not incomplete but you still hold half of each other#HAHA WOW anyway I'm in danger :)#don't. don't look at me#should i even tag this. yeah okay#Danny Phantom#pitch pearl
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So I've had this wip sitting in my folders for months now and decided to ressurect it to satiate the urge to draw these two again
#I actually finished a wip after abandoning it for so long alright iconic moment for me personally#this is them in the cab coming back from the warrens after getting their asses handed to them by all the szlachta#she handled herself a lil better but vincent is squishy and almost died like. 10 times#vtm#vtmb#the fledgling#brujah#oc.vince#oc.pepper#ship: viper#sleepyscribble#she looks a lil sad bc yk she nearly lost the dude and she starts realizing she liiikes hiiiiiim teehee#she legit doesn't know what she would do if she rlly lost him#but she doesn't think she's in love ofc ofc it's just that yk he's the only person she really feels like she can trust#and the only one she feels really good around and who she feels she could tell anything to#and tbh she hasn't felt this way with anyone else in a long long time even before she became undead and had to deal w the other kindred#but that's normal for a friendship yk this is just a really strong friendship why ruin it with romance right that's stupid#no she wasn't watching him take his shirt off with her eyes almost popping out of her skull the other day shhh that didn't happen#she doesn't even remember he has freckles on his back and a scar on his shoulder. the left one. she doesn't remember she wasn't even lookin#ANYWAY no lust no feelings she's fine don't worry abt it 👍🏻#viper art
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@weeeeps 's Vera
This probably isn't very biblically accurate, but your characters are so cute I wanted to draw them!
#I didn't even realize how long we'd been following each other!#Your characters are so fun and they're always an inspiration when I see them on my dash :)#Others' OC#OC#Digital art#Angel#Wings... Perspective... Boobs... 3 of the hardest things to draw and I probably botched them so don't look too hard lol#artists on tumblr
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new Danyal al Ghul au just dropped! --or at least some art of it did. I call it the "Stillborn? No, no, still born" au (or stillborn just for short)
it's based off a batfam comment I saw that mentioned in the early comics Bruce knew about Talia's pregnancy and was ecstatic to be a father. So much so that Talia feared he'd give up being Batman for it, so when she gave birth she put the baby (Damian) on a doorstep and (seemingly) told Bruce that the baby was stillborn.
I saw it, thought "mm, tasty!" and thought what if that baby was Danny instead of Damian? By default I was thinking of making him a few years older, however, it works just as well with demon twins. I need to think it over. Meet Daniel Brown! 14 year old foster kid whose been with the Fentons for the last two years! He has SO many issues haha. hah. lmfao even.
Danny's theme song is literally just "Good Kid" from the Percy Jackson musical, to sum him up.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#danyal al ghul au#dpdc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc art#dc x dp#dcxdp#dp x dc#stillborn? no still born au#stillborn au#danny's been fucking through it!!! watch me jam this kid pack full of issues. :)#long haired danny fenton#poc danny fenton#danyal al ghul#this boy needs antidepressants. therapy. and probably some rehab. we'll see where i go with that last one#the fentons have been the best foster family he's had so far. although best is not synonymous with safest.#that fourth one was me doodling how i imagine danny's first meeting with bruce goes. and by first meeting i mean#'danny doesn't even realize bruce is his bio dad but bruce comes to the awful and ugly revelation that his firstborn child was alive this#whole time and that talia lied to him again. and also his firstborn was fistfighting a fucking inter-dimensional being with a KNIFE'#danny's too busy fighting skulker to care about who the guy at the outdoor cafe is beyond asking him if he could borrow the spare patio#chair at his table. its so he can throw it at skulker. he didn't have time to transform so!! fenton fight it is!!#i looked up the most common and generic last name for danny and 'daniel brown' had too much of a nice flow to it for me to bother looking#for something else. technically his name *should* be danyal bc that was on the note. but :) we all know how the system can be.#long hair danny ftw
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How do you sleep at night? No one to hide behind Betrayed every alibi you had You had every chance to make amends instead you got drunk on bitterness And you still claim that you're innocent, it's sad
#daniel ricciardo#dr3#christian horner#for the blacklists#I recognize that christian horner in a gifset is NOT the kind of content people in ricnation are looking for rn#debated posting this but fuck it#me 🤝🏼 daniel: two bitches that love a depressing song lyric#it's about breaking free from a toxic relationship and the importance of prioritizing one's own needs#and that it can take a long time to recognize the dynamics at play in those relationships#and removing yourself from that situation can be just as hard and that just kind of epitomizes daniel with christian for me#in the return to rbr I think daniel trusted that CH would at the very least be straight forward and upfront with him#even if the end result wasn't what daniel wanted or hoped for#daniel could handle not getting the rbr seat#but something he couldn't handle was the truth that the one person he believed he could trust was gaslighting him and using him#and daniel had a light bulb moment - the point where you realize that sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to walk away#and so he got out#also this is obviously my interpretation of a relationship that I have zero insider info on and maybe they are chill now#as always…thinking too deeply about people I don’t know in the tags#also i recognize that this song is actually about a tiktok hype house but whatever rbr are that immature so it fits#this is my first go with this type of editing in PS so if you have any tips on style and execution i'm all ears#Apparently i also owe CH an apology bc i was so sure he didn't shake daniel's hand pre-race in singapore but he actually did and i missed i#during the breakdown i was having anyway fuck him still
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ALL OF US STRANGERS (2023) dir. ANDREW HAIGH
#filmedit#filmgifs#movieedit#moviegifs#All of Us Strangers#aousedit#filmtvdaily#filmtvcentral#cinemapix#fyeahmovies#dailyflicks#mine*#mygifs#movies*#I can't believe this is done. and you won't believe how long it took me to make it. insane... because it's just a scene#I didn't even use different fonts. or a cool template. or transitions... it was a single scene... but look... I made captures for 10 gifs#and things kept happening and I kept finding little gestures and beautiful things and I just couldn't keep them out the gifs#I mean look at Harry and that slow realization. please look at the glow around his shoulders at the beginning#and how ethereal and out of this world he already is AND THEN when Adam says 'I found you' he becomes more... real and present!#and those eyes and the intensity of that 'you're here' and their eyes and faces and smiles and how Harry's desperate but Adam calms him dow#and his voice when he asks 'how come no one found me?' the realization that people didn't care to check on him. it screamed to my soul#I haven't stopped thinking about that scene since the moment I first watched it#honestly... I wish I could live in this scene forever#now this is a super long post and I know it won't get many notes and it was surely made before... but I needed to make this for myself...#so here it is :) I'm tired but I love it#GOD the way Harry goes full baby when Adam caresses his cheek and he SMILES LIKE THAT! AHHHHHHH!#*runs down the hill screaming*
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Hey so, funny thing happened
hey what if I cried
#omg my post has been waterlogged this is awesome#Joel would never say or probably even think this in this type of wording but hey what if I cried anyway#that still applies to Jimmy so much. to me. I want to love you in front of people who didn't...#Joel being part of the ecosystem in which Jimmy's at the bottom of the food chain and treated as such. Even if they're long time friends#And then he realizes one day hey that's not cool. What they're doing to Jimmy is not cool. And that that includes him too#And he's not sure how to do better but he wants to. And he's not sure about his feelings when he wants to get closer but he does#sorry I hate it here#blabber
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Randomly consumed today by the thought of henghill cuddles, but like from a specific point in their relationship, like after they've only recently started laying in the same bed together.
It's something that takes them a long time to work up to; they both have nightmares, and yeah, Dan Heng is a Vidyadhara and he can heal himself beyond anything Boothill could accidentally do to him, but still. Boothill is made of metal now. He's heavy. It wouldn't take much, just a single flailing limb to cause some damage. He still gets up after Dan Heng falls asleep, and sneaks down into the guest cabin in one of the other cars.
But he'll lay in bed with Dan Heng until then. At first Boothill would always try to situate a blanket between them, because well. Metal isn't exactly pleasant to cuddle. But more and more lately, he's noticed Dan Heng keeps worming his way around their soft barrier and just kind of...rubbing his hand along him? Open palm up the curve of his side, across the planes of his chest, into the star-shape at his solar plexus, down the plates of his abdomen, back to his side again. Fingertips tap soundlessly against metal, or press into dents and divots, or smooth over old scars in the steel.
"Ya don't hav'ta do that, ya know."
"Does it bother you?"
Dan Heng's hand has already stopped, settling somewhere on the futon, neutral ground. Boothill clarifies that no, it doesn't bother him. But he can't feel any of it. He only knows he's doing it because he can see the motion out of the corner of his eye. Dan Heng doesn't need to go through the extra effort to do things for him like he would someone with a normal human body.
And Dan Heng goes quiet, just long enough that Boothill gets curious and turns to look at him over his shoulder. He has the cute little furrow between his brows, like when he's thinking.
And then he opens that pretty mouth of his and says, "That's alright, I think I'm doing it for myself, anyway" and Boothill nearly wheezes because wow, Dan Heng is almost never quite that honest when it comes to himself fdklsajlkd
Boothill cackles in surprise and asks point blank what he means, because what could he be getting out of that? Given the implied permission, Dan Heng's hand starts it's usual route again. Side, chest, solar plexus, abdomen, side. Boothill can practically hear him chewing on his words.
"I like that you're warm," is what he finally says, and Boothill suddenly feels like a bullet has just grazed something vital. "All the processes you run increase your temperature," Dan Heng's hand fans out across a span of steel and he holds it there, like he's soaking up the heat. "And your metal is smooth, it feels pleasant to touch," his fingertips move in circles, slip into a divot perfectly sized, rub back and forth. Boothill silently wills one of his cooling fans threatening to open up to stay closed.
"I like how you feel under my hands. That's all." Headshot! No recovery possible.
"...Suit yerself, then," and Boothill quickly turns back over before Dan Heng can see it in his face, how close he just hit to his heart.
#honkai star rail#henghill#bootheng#hsr dan heng#hsr boothill#pardon me I read a really really good porno this morning and was feeling inspired fjdklasjfkld#Look soft fuzzy super plush things are my faves- but nice smooth metal is so so nice too.#you know those fidget toys that are silky smooth material and they just have like a perfect little divot to rub the pad of your thumb into?#that's the kind of thing I'm getting at.#plus. plus!!#Dan Heng seems to dislike the cold. And we see why in 2.4 when he comments that the Shackling Prison is as cold as he remembers it.#And Dan Heng sleeps in the archive for a reason. he likes the sense of security in there.#it's a huge deal for him after being so violently hunted for so long#and I love the thought that Boothill reminds him of that. He's warm and he whirs and he's made of metal like some of the machinery in there#Dan Heng likes that regardless of whether he realizes why or not.#he likes to touch him. he just likes how he feels <3#and I think that would be something important to Boothill too because like. I don't think he HATES his body or anything.#but he didn't exactly get it under happy circumstances. and he does consider his human body as a toll that had to be paid.#he refers to any malfunctions as frightening to other people in one of his parlor car lines.#he refers to himself as a man already dead.#So I think it would hit a little harder than Boothill's prepared for to hear Dan Heng not only doesn't mind but even likes his body as it i#they're so sweet I love them so much uweh#hsr#dan heng#boothill
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I really love Gwen's story in the end of ATSV cuz even if she and Miles never speak again she has real friends now, she's not all alone anymore. She has people who understand her the way others couldn't. And things aren't 100% perfect in her dimension but at least her father no longer thinks she's a murderer and even though everyone else will probably never change their mind about her in her world at least her father is here on her side. It's a huge improvement from how things were in the first movie and the majority of the second one. She spent the whole first movie realizing what it's like to be happy again, in the second movie she was afraid that she would lose everything because things were even worse than before, at one point she did lose everything, and after that she gained more than she thought she would.
Of course she was so negative about stuff, cuz when life is beating you down for too long you forget that good things can happen.
#I'm surprised that we don't make more analyses about her character cuz it's so good#probably because most of y'all are too busy hating her#anyway#it's always like that#when you've been sad for too long you forget what it's like to be happy and you stop trying to make yourself happy#gwen stacy#spider woman#ghost spider#spider gwen#spider man across the spider verse#across the spiderverse#into the spiderverse#beyond the spiderverse#spider man into the spider verse#spider man beyond the spider verse#Spiderverse#took me how many days to realize that i misspelled story as sorry even though i read this post again and again to see if i there are some#spelling mistakes#like how come i didn't see that i read this post so many times#also is instead of in#pls tell me in future it's like this post was hacked#so apparently it's since i posted it I'm losing my mind here how come i didn't see it????????????????
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Day 3 Trouble!
In which we get to see what happens in the AU where there was only one rroneek.
#I SWEAR THIS IS THE LAST LONG ONE NFKDSLANFL;#i honestly didn't even realize there were so many lmaooo#exhibit A of Eren being weak to her laugh/joy#erenwolweek2024#erenville#tavi#taviville#my gposes
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yoohoo, I just need you to know you've ruined my life✌️ /j but like. finished reading frequency, what three days ago now? and since the moment I put it down, I have been. directionless. listless. I am consumed by, not DESPAIR, because despair is too passionate a word but. dissatisfaction? I miss the life I lived while I was still reading it. which is honestly rather appropriate considering some of the themes in the fic. I miss the person I was when half of my mind existed in the realm of the au. I fear I may never get over it and I may never recover the life I once had before this fic ruined me for all others, but I also cannot bring myself to regret reading it even if I never feel satisfaction again. I have tasted ambrosia, and the bread and wine of men shall forever be ash upon my tongue. pay my therapy bill.
i know these asks were sent in july but i love them and want to immortalize before they get buried in my inbox
first of all thank you so much!!! frequency has been one of my favourite projects to do over the past couple years i love that ppl are so into this absurdly niche fic. (i cannot pay ur therapy u simply must reread it forever rip (i mean writing it was like 50/50 self-indulgence and catharsis which means maybe reading it does the same thing lmaoo))
second yes! yeah it was Six who changed the timeline. a big old theme, possibly the main theme, of the whole fic is about change and who gets to create it. Six mirrors Thad in the ways that he believes himself unworthy of importance, and that the capacity to create change is inherently barred from him because of who and what he is.
so it was really important that Six was the one to make the choice to try change things - the guy whos entire powerset relies on being as inconsequential as possible. it shatters the original timeline, it results in his death, it causes a lot of very bad ripple effects, but he also saves Nathaniel. who saves Jude. who together both save Thad - who saves Bart and CRAYDL and defeats Three and discovers his own capacity for change in the process.
that was sort of the point of the whole "the spectrum of change is a horizon, not a tower" litany. there's no hierarchy. anybody can go towards it, they just gotta choose where they're going.
Six doesn't really save the day, but by wrenching the prewritten tragedy off its course, he creates the opportunity for Thad & co. to save it themselves.
#asks#frequency fic#morriganmisbeth#genuinely fell so in love with Six while writing frequency and it definitely shows lmao#but at his core he's basically just Thad's fixation on ''importance'' taken to its logical extreme#Six doesn't think he can do anything about anything so he doesn't even try. because he's - in a very meta sense - not the main character#in the same way that Three - in a very meta sense - has decided his only escape is to Become The Main Character#it matters a lot when Six ''goes linear'' because (by fostering real connections with Jude and Nathaniel) he has become part of the story#and therefore has to experience it like everyone else#and has the capacity to affect the narrative like everyone else#like Three's whole speech to Bart about ''if the universe didn't want me to kill you somebody wouldve stopped me by now''#is basically 2 degrees away from a kinda meta awareness that - purely by virtue of being the main character - Bart has plot armor#Three knows that if he becomes Bart Allen he can basically do anything and everything#because there wouldn't be a fucking story otherwise#and then Thad's ultimate realization in the end is that. yknow. hes a person. and Bart's a person.#and obsessing over who gets to do x or y because the ''universe'' says so is bullshit#hes literally part of the universe he gets to do whatever he wants because HE says so#tags went long sorry i like talking abt this
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in my rereading flowey is not a good lifecoach era and this shit kinda sucks flowey why are you telling him your life story??? why not go after your curiosity you literally brought up instead of this dumb plot you haven't even thought out like it'd be much more interesting for flowey to try to investigate papyrus's past (wink wink nudge nudge) and figure out why he's the way he is. like generally a more interesting plot. and if you're gonna go with this dumb idea at least manipulate even a LITTLE better flowey you do NOT need to pull out your backstory??? you also wouldn't do that so idk what the fuck you're on about like just go "oh gee ur so cool and strong and i feel so safe around you cause youre the toughest guy ikoww... but im worried bout you cause youre so nice too and you give too many chances 🥺🥺🥺🥺 also undyne's not letting you in the royal guard isn't she so mean for that." like flowey should be a manipulative mastermind why was the best thing he could come up with was just telling papyrus his backstory??? also why does papyrus just take that like bitch you should know that's literally asriel dreemurr?? that's literally his story?
#thank you papyru for heh... encouraging me to give it another look#idek why i thought this was so good i'm already getting annoyed#take it from me; the mascot of having bad takes#lock in... consume things with your brain on sometimes#maybe itll make you like it more and maybe itll make you realize “wait this kinda sucks.”#still mad they didn't go with the much more interesting plot in favor of torture#ooc torture but like torture nonetheless#flowey is not a good life coach#AND he's also fucking stupid apparently??? just go after why papyrus is (according to you) so desperate for affection#why waste your time on a plan you don't even know will work because you have no long game
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how come kevin finds hope in the trojans and their playstyle but jean doesn't, at least before he joins the team
#my posts#aftg#kevin day#all for the game#the sunshine court#i didn't realize this until now but interesting to think abt???#because kevin had been a raven for far longer#and also how come he was even /allowed/ to be so obsessed with them???#tsc says he's been their biggest fan as long as jean has known him#and everyone seems to know about it???#i am now extremely confused about this#i also find it weird how he was even allowed to keep kayleigh's letter when riko knew about it?????????????#is there a very simple explanation i'm not thinking of
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Hi? Gosh how do I even start with this :'D
I know it's been ages since I've last popped up on here. I've been debating when to post this for a while, but I kept adding to my draft more and more and now it's the end of JULY omgg I felt so guilty disappearing with zero updates but then thought my birthday would be the best day to finally address this considering it'll feel less random? idk but Ive always celebrated my bday with you guys and I'd feel so bad answering your kind asks without me at least explaining why I was gone for months.
Truth be told, I was dealing with a lot of stuff irl. health issues and sudden declining grades that left me stumped and drained for months now- along with technical issues like having to replace some parts of my computer that took a while for me to find to even draw digitally, which I didn't have the time for anyway with how tired and weary I felt every day.
I'm frankly shaken up by a lot of shit rn and I don't know how to be active online with this burden on my chest- Especially as it's been a while since I've even looked at utmv related content and my motivation dwindled. I swear I'd hype myself up to post or reblog something- but I'd see just how much I've missed or the overwhelming amount of posts I'd need to go through and I'd feel so swamped with exhaustion and most importantly guilt, for not clearing the air up sooner to reassure you guys that I'm, y'know, alive, and not dead in a ditch somewhere. And I'd procrastinate cause typing it all out is hard and I'd give up halfway every time and it's just not fair to you all!
I thought I was handling it well when I started going out and socializing more, instead of staying cooped up at home on my computer all day. and in the first draft of this post I made months ago I was gonna detail some of the fun plans I had, for my life and for this blog :D but relaxing my strict study schedule and letting go a bit of my tight routine, thinking it was better than wringing myself dry to keep it up, backfired horribly, to say the least.
I know right?? so silly to be hung up on stupid shit like studies of all things! but this is a very important thing for me considering my career plans and the competitivity encouraged by everyone I'm surrounded by, the pressure of keeping up adding to my already stressful days. I had to fix myself up first and I couldn't handle the strain nor interact with people and thinking of jobs and exams sapped my energy so much it's frankly embarrassing. writing this feels so cheesy too and it frustrates me to know I could've come back a month earlier if it weren't for that, but I also know putting all of this into words then would just sound like incoherent venting (not that this is very different tbf) and I wasn't in the right headspace to address my absence, or anything really- I didn't want everyone to see me return when I couldn't muster up a genuinely positive message, let alone talk to anyone with a shadow of my usual cheer
I feel like a complete mess and It drives me up the wall how depressed I've gotten. I debated deleting this blog so many times 'cause the fear of disappointing my audience and my friends, for lack of a more fitting sentiment, made me feel even shittier. I'm constantly thinking if this wall of text is worth posting, or if it's better not to burden you all with all my sappy troubles as if it's the end of the world. Trust me, I'll be fine. I'm not trying to dramatize this situation, but I don't think I'm up to pretending I'm all sunshine and enthusiasm you're all accustomed to.
So sorry for worrying you all! I'll try to catch up, deliver some missed birthday gifts, and answer some asks while I'm at it! Again, I can't state how much I appreciate your support throughout the years. It's frankly a miracle I kept any of you around with how much I keep popping and leaving at random with no warning. I definitely can't promise for my stay to be without a hitch, and if you don't mind an inconsistent schedule you're free to stay of course, but I'm afraid I can't sustain the pace I had when I first started this blog. I'll keep posting art, but lower my activity in the fandom sphere to reduce the strain on my mental health. so fewer rants and walls of text, more art, and less stress overall. Love you all and thanks for waiting for this long <3
#I'm not leaving the fandom btw! Just realized it kinda sounds like I will but I won't!#Still got my fem versions and some animations to spice things up in case I feel less inclined to draw my resident skeles lol#To the people that reached out before this thank you SO much!!!#I know this is not gonna reach many people considering my leave but i deeply appreciate it<3#I wouldn't be surprised if people forgot why they even followed me in the first place with how long I've left this time Hhhh#There's some plans about commissions as well cause no matter how many times I fix this poor pc it keeps failing me lmao#And I wanna try my hand at it to feel less pressured and dependent on my academics :')#It's a scary thought and an even scarier process and idk if you guys will be interested? but that's for another post ig >:)c#muah muah ily all thanks for EVERYTHING cause I'd restart this blog all anew if I didn't have so many people that I'd miss around here >:'D#blah blah Yuri is back on her bs so get ready for some banger art!!#To any mutual reading this pleaaaase bear with me if I don't reblog your art immediately#cause I've been tagged on a few and I wanna give them five tags each at minimum and I don't know where to start HHH#If there's something specific you want me to see you're welcome to tag me In it but don't be discouraged I haven't gotten to it yet!#This is So long I'm genuinely sorry aughghg 😭
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