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killa-trav · 9 months ago

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absolutely crazy that travis had to pay well over a million usd just for his family and taylor n her family to watch him at the super bowl wtfff

#super bowl prices are fucking insane #granted it's a suite but still like paying that much #just for ur loved ones is in the words of kylie: fucking bananas #saw a tiktok of this girl who paid $23 just for a gatorade and a pepsi #like that's just stupid #one thing i hate about sports #is the inflation when big events happen #it's silly #i didn't even know until last week that #the super bowl isn't really for the fans who go week in week out #cos the tickets are that expensive like wtf #imagine watching ur team all season only to not go to the biggest game #bc it's not accessible to the normal us person

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callonpeevesie · 2 years ago

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The Kiss but it's mailee

@maileeweek day 7: free day

#maileeweek2023 #atla #avatar: the last airbender #mailee #mai #ty lee #ty lee x mai #fanart #the kiss #der kuss #gustav klimt #peevesie draws #original content #id in alt text #please i didn't even know it's mailee week until after it had begun #i'd been rotating this idea for a while so i decided to draw it #i think i'm happy with this #all i know is i can't keep staring at it any longer

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trekkiehood · 13 days ago

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#ok ramble time #classic this feels too intimate to share with anyone so everyone gets it #essentially last week there was a suicide on campus #he was not one of my students or in our department #I'm pretty removed from it #ans i really didn't think it affected me #but i guess it has #bc like i thought i was over #✨this✨#Like ok i have had active plans in the past #one of those this is how this is when this is where #just waiting for the final straw #but i clearly never did #and that plan would no longer work due to changes in circumstances and living arrangements etc #which is honestly probably for the best #bc i refuse to make a new one bc i know i do not want to go there #but im just TIRED and ANXIOUS #its not even the depression its the anxiety of living #i stay up until 3-4 in the morning bc i cant stand the idea of going to sleep #and i secretly hope each sleep will be my last #bc im not going to DO anything bc that would not be it #too many ppl care about me (unfortunately)#and then ive stopped eating (again)#and it's like idek if its bc i dont want to or bc i forget #its like i see myself self destructing but cant make myself stop #and I have not done anything physically stupid in quite a long time but ive started biting to stim #and i dont even know im doing it half the time it just helps #and skin picking. which none or this is the same as true s/h but it does scare me to a degree bc i dont mean to i just do it #anyway i don't expect anyone to read all of this i just had to get it out ot my head

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the-obnoxious-sibling · 1 year ago

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The verb shanks uses being also break up/divorce is sending me. I’m going to be delulu and decide it is what Oda meant. Buggy burned their wedding certificate. /joking

Btw if you ever feel need to talk about buggy just go for it, it was one of the best analysis I saw recently on this site. /genuine

Where were you hiding all those years I needed you/joking

(context for the divorce comment)

the joke usually goes that the person burning the marriage certificate thinks it's like a receipt and now their partner can't get rid of them... of course buggy knows it's much more like a product registration form, and without it shanks can't get any of the support promised in the warranty!

& thank you!! people have been so very kind in their response to my thoughts! i don't have anything new and buggy-specific to say at the moment, i'm afraid—i have fic ideas, but i think we may be at the point where i need more material to read before i can generate meta without someone prompting me—though i did just find some buggy meta that was posted not long after 1082 came out that melted my brain a little. that should be coming out of my queue in a week or so!

#as for where i was hiding… opla pulled me back in after i got tired of waiting for wano to wrap up lmao #i simply do not have the endurance to read a longrunning series like op week-by-week anymore #even volume-by-volume is a struggle… i want that complete story!#but i'd lost touch with my op friends and had no idea that wano finished up last fall…#otoh it's lucky i didn't know! i woulda caught up back then and forgotten about op until egghead finished #and i never would've been infected with the 1082 brain rot! and where would we be then?#tos answers #one piece #mm… to tag a post vaguely about the ship with the ship tag vs the urge to stop spamming the damn tag with how much i’ve been posting lately #it’s a conundrum for sure :/#aaaah fuck it #shuggy #buggy

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jnple · 8 months ago

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good news: i found a four leaf clover in my yard!

bad news: i did break a bone after all! IT HURTS!!!!

#glad i went in for a follow up #but i won't be able to get a cast before Monday or Tuesday.... :(( I'm kinda scared it's healing in the wrong spot...#it wasn't hurting that much until they straightened out my hand to put it in a temporary cast #hey. but you know what. this is ok #i needed to slow down anyway #my knee was in the middle of overuse and i kept trying to rest but didn't. I'm gonna take these next few weeks to just slooowww dowwwn #and at the end I'll be all healed. it'll be so good. I'll use my hand again and I'll run again. and until then I'll read and draw and nap #it isn't even a hairline fracture. it's like a whole piece of the bone broke off. it's unfortunate that they missed it last week :(#I'm not gonna think about this.... I'm gonna think about....a abut...paprus instead -///-

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bsaka7 · 10 months ago

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sorry the funniest thing about hockey is that they really make these guys play in. des moines. st paul. loser ass sports cities.

#i can say this bc i have at various points in my life driven to both of these places once a week.#i mean i like st paul and i have gone to st paul sts games etc and tbh i like dsm too but it's soooo funny to me #dude living their professional sporting dream. lives in st paul. dude gets drafted to an nhl team. moves to DES MOINES #or rockford #god i don't even like Rockford but they have a banger off-season robotics comp #i can't even bear to go look at the full list of where these teams are.#mke is cool tho even tho i literally didn't know mke had a hockey team until like. last month #do u guys hate me i have strong opinions on Midwest geography. i can't believe im going to Boston for 6mo #im going to be eaten alive and then maybe move out west for one more winter OR im moving to the tc and getting a real job #hock.txt #'to the tc' I need to be an hour away or im killing myself #i worry these posts Will let u find out where I'm from but then i remember i post about it occasionally lol. if u know u know.#ALL THIS cuz i saw a pic of big dew and i was like wow he could have been one of the average-cute boys at my hs #So instead of making a mean post. I made this one.

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butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway · 24 days ago

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I don't have a lot of energy these days [because of The Horrors] so I'm looking at my day and my priorities and trying to plan how I'm going to spend what energy I have, because I do need to be able to rest and relax but there are also things that need doing and that is a careful balance for me.

I managed to [mostly] clean the kitchen last night so I've kicked it out of the priority list until next weekend. Unfortunately the living room, bathroom, bedroom, and my office all need cleaning too. I think of the priorities, my office and the bedroom are the most important to me, so I'll probably push the living room and bathroom until at least Friday.

There's also the laundry. I don't have any clean clothes and as we're moving into winter I need to be more rigid about getting that done because days where the clothes can be dried on the line will be more limited. So I definitely need to wash an outfit or two and hang them up in the next hour.

That's already a really busy day, so I'll probably cut it there. But it's definitely going to still leave me a lot of work this week. Half my cleaning, at least one more round of laundry, settling dog food for the next couple of weeks, planting the fall/winter greens, doing some set up work on my computer, work on some writing projects, cleaning out the fridge, and patching some worn clothes. My work week isn't insane atm, but it is definitely limiting. Right now I have 6+4+0+4+2+5+5= 25 non work/non-survival needs (sleep, food, shower, etc) hours available each week. I need to figure out a regukar distribution of these that means everything is getting done and I still have an hour a day to myself as often as possible. I think it's probably not realistic to give myself more than an hour a day for free time/fun, which is a bit unfortunate because I've found in the past that my floor tends to be getting 2-3hrs of free time most days because of how I deal with transition and decision-making.

25-7 [1hr per day] is 18 hrs, so I just need to decide where and how to distribute those in order to keep pace with things.

Lets say the garden needs 3hrs per week, the laundry needs 4 hours (specifically 2 sets of 2 morning/early afternoon hours), the cleaning needs an hour a day to get through a maintenance clean of the house, and 3 hours once a week to work down any deep cleaning that's built up. Which is....already three more hours than I actually have each week. So I guess I'll make a plan to work in the garden for 20-40min of 4 of my free hours each week.

It really doesn't leave me any wiggle room. Only about 4 hours a week that isn't explicitly allotted to something that needs doing, which means there will probably me a lot of weeks where I only get an hour or so at best across the whole thing for free time. I guess I've had a hard time accepting that at this point, having actual time for myself or a time-intensive project is only available if I've taken a day off work. I love my job, but it's ... not comfortable to realize that it's the only love in my life I actually have time for anymore.

I think that's probably why I end up here so much. It's this mindless little way of zoning out into my own head, dissociating away from the exhaustion, for a few minutes at a time. I keep thinking I want to use this space differently, make it more if the things I enjoy. But I think what I really want is just to actually have the time and energy to do things I love that take work. I keep crying a few times every day and I couldn't figure out why, but like

I dunno

Why **wouldn't** I cry a little every day? It's the closest I'm getting to actual emotional release or relaxation in my life. We'd probably all cry. Heck. A lot of us probably DO, capitalism being what it is.

I guess I'm starting to wonder why I'm doing what I'm doing. What is there left for me to sacrifice to this life? What is actually serving me about not just letting myself go up like a fireball and take my surroundings with me? What in the ever loving fuck am I fighting this hard for?

All I ever want, all I want now, is to be able to live. To really, actually live. How does wanting to live bring you this close to killing yourself, whether on accident or on purpose? What am I actually doing that is LIVING and what am I doing that is FACILITATION of living? It can't all be facilitation, or I'm not actually facilitating fuck all.

I'm 30 goddamn years old and I need to figure out what it looks like to actually love my life. I fundamentally refuse to zombify myself like this for everyone else around me forever.

#i really wanted to believe that if i just sat down and did the math i'd be able to figure it out.#but there is literally not enough time in the day for me to do all this.#i suppose i could sleep less. it's...not great for me to get less than 9 hrs a day #but i could probably pull it off for brief stints #a week on a week off or something #get an extra two hours a day that way #and then of course there's my old go to #i could just stop eating or taking care of myself #lord knows it's my well-being that restri ts my time more than anything else #and if i work myself to death like mom did instead of committing suicide at least the life insurance pays out #in case anyone gives wifey inheritance trouble #i already don't eat until dinner so that part won't give me a TON of extra time #but an hour a day at the end of the night to write does sound lovely so it might be worth it #on the weeks i sleep less i could use my 2 extra hours a day to do ingredient prep so that wifey's food doesn't go to waste as much #maybe even work on the garden and the yard's facilities a bit. i have a few projects that need time and attention so those'd fot in #if i cut my pain meds too i could put an extra $50/week back in my budget and i could use that for project supplies and emergency funds #god even thinking about this is making me so tired.#i don't know what this will leave of me #i've been doing this so long now #feels like the last time i remember having a consistent hour to myself every day was my BA sophomore year #and that was the first time too lmao #i'd spent high school waking up at 3am every day after going to bed at 12am because I needed to do my hw in the mornings #my bus left at 7:30am and i had to do all my paper assignments - make myself lunch for the day - wash dishes/tidy the kitchen - and THEN #i could finally make sure i had my shit together for the bus and maybe nap for 5min #then i didn't get home from school until 4pm and i had to fix the kitchen from whatever my parents did before i got back #then make dinner for the family #then clean the living room from whatever the pets had dome all day #then take the dog for her nightly walk and take a shower #and usually sometime after dinner around 9pm I would get permission to run to my room and try to get a head start on my hw before 11pm #that was my lights out curfew so it gave me a blessed single guaranteed hour to do something for me.....assuming i could stay conscious

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 7 months ago

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#these past two weeks have been so intense that ive just.. not spoken about it once i got home from work #blocked it all out #my beloved colleague whose desk is next to mine has cancer #breast and uterus. she needs two major surgeries #they just diagnosed her two weeks ago #so we've been trying to deal with that as colleagues and friends #because we love and miss her and i am so deeply sad as well #but i feel like i couldn't process that at all bc two days after the news of her diagnosis i was asked to take on half of her work #on top of my fulltime #which i agreed to do bc i like her tasks and i want to help her and i also know i can do it #but it does feel very off bc i know i don't earn enough money for this workload to be long term and it is def like this #for the coming four months at least #so i did tell my manager that i would like a raise and. that bitch told me to BUY MORE SECOND HAND SHIT.#i seriously thought i saw my life flash before my eyes #then the day after she asked one of my colleagues who's been with the firm for over 30 years whether she was looking for another job maybe?#which caused that colleague to instantly go home in tears and be home from basically a nervous breakdown the past 1.5 week #which is her full right and i support her with all my heart but bc my management sucks it meant that we had to also carry her tasks ofc #i felt soooo spread thin and super super angry actually but i didn't even realise how angry i was until last thursday my colleague w cancer #came by the office. and talked about all of it. and i suddenly realised how sad i was but then also how angry #but i was just blocking it all out trying to stay afloat #bc we told her about what the manager had said and she said “i hope that i get the chance to really tell her how it is someday.”#“because the stress she causes with people can actually kill you. just look at me.”#and the rest of the day i felt so ready to be done with everything actually #but seeing her anger made me see my own anger #and released me of my own pent up emotions bc i had actual leg pains this week and it was purely psychosomatic #i then managed to tell some friends yesterday about what was going on and their outrage spurred me on even more #so today i emailed hr. demanding a raise #doing this amount of work while constantly feeling like the house is on fire while also struggling financially seriously makes me suicidal #and i am not joking #so.. if nothing comes of that im leaving that job and not looking back

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sysig · 7 months ago

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Still normal don’t even worry about it (Patreon)

#Doodles #ADHD #I was Very nice to my fixation - when it was fixated on the thing I wanted it to be lol #Honestly I wasn't even that mean about the two (2!!) other things it wanted to brain-focus on #Mad about it but in that dopamine way lol #''Can we please get dopamine from this thing and not those other things? Please'' ''Lol''#That is not an answer!#It is honestly still really interesting data :0 #I've still never successfully forced a fixation but this is at least the second time I've continued a falling fixation #I wonder what the through-line is hahaha <knows the through-line #I was actually very resistant to fixating on the other things because my pride got in the way again lol #To the point where I didn't even write them down until recently pffft yeah that's how that works #''If I don't write them down then they don't count'' Uh Huh #Even if there are Some similarities to the last time I forcefully refixated there are still enough differences to make for interesting data #Like how the last time I had three in conflict did Not go well it was very rough on my brain - but this time was nice :D #Probably helps that the two-pair were kinda-sort from the same source so really I guess it Could be argued that it was just two in conflict #But I'm not counting it that way and since it's my brain and I make the rules that's what matters lol #The next set is one of the fixations you all saw the TV Guide for this week it's fine lol #The other - it's another video game but hmmm I might see about making fanart if/when I actually get to play it myself #It's very silly so I'm gonna hold onto it for a bit longer haha

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blissfulstatic · 11 months ago

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i started all of these games at wildly different times, took varying levels of breaks partway through each of them, and then finished all of their achievements in the same two days

i don't know what to do with myself now

#buenos dias short people #tunic was like. i played to maybe halfway. took a months long break #when i picked it back up i didnt remember what i was doing so i started a new file and played like a third #months long break. but this time i resumed the second file and played through to the end #the game is very cryptic but starting over gave me a handle on the mechanics and what was important #outer wilds took like four tries even though i knew it would be good i just wasnt hooked #the game is about knowledge even more than tunic like knowledge is the whole deal and it comes slowly at first #but when it hit it really hit. god damn #please play outer wilds #spyro? um. it was good #i don't know that i took any big breaks from it? there were some but a couple weeks at most #spyro levels are not particularly complex. or content rich. and i really felt that 60 hours #playing the whole trilogy all back to back can really burn you out #its a collectathon you're bound to spend a good while just wandering around to find that one last thing you missed #and i didn't know i could left stick for sparx to point out the nearest gems until like halfway through 2 so that was a time waster #im not saying it wasn't a good game but spyros moveset is like. glide fire charge and you do this for three games #until they throw in random nonspyro playable characters in 3 and they all control really bad and weird. but its still mostly spyro #i could have taken big breaks between each game and it would've been better probably but its a collection im gonna roll to the next one

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thesinglesock · 3 months ago

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tried being less on social media but ended up just replacing my tumblr screentime with watching the Muppet Show (1976) instead.

#I have had near 0 contact w the muppets in my life fun fact #despite the everything about me I didn't even know that their deal was that they're colleagues. until last week #I just assumed they all just knew each other because they're all puppets #vitpost

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eyes-of-nine · 4 months ago

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me: I should be allowed to bite my coworkers for not showing up for our shift I should be allowed to bite my coworkers for not showing up for our shift I should be allowed to bite my cowor-

the dead cistercian monks watching me mop their monastery alone in fishnets at 8am on a saturday:

#ok ok last time #but the two siblings I had shifts with this week have been a slight nightmare to work with #regularly late #not following up on things until explicitly and repeatedly pressured to do so #not ordering things from storage for a solid hour bc they didn't know how to spell earl grey so they decided to just not do it #and then deciding that they can arrive 10 minutes before we open even though our shift started almost an hour earlier bc #and i quote ''there isn't that much shit to do bf we open''#we ended up opening up without the coffee machine even being turned on ywy #alright enough of my annoying yapping #slot posting #I think the monks were on my side tbh

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nerdyfangirlingbooks · 5 months ago

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Every now and then I remember the times I would mention to my flatmate that I was thinking of buying myself something reasonably expensive (that I had been eyeing up for months and had budgeted for) and she'd tell me that I shouldn't spend that much money on something I didn't need and it would be stupid etc etc while she regularly impulse bought things that cost at least as much and she would use once (while complaining that she was under a lot of financial stress and couldn't afford <$3/week for 2 months for a rental washing machine when ours broke). She is... perhaps not my first call for financial advice

#like I get that you're financially stressed but also it feels a bit rich to complain about it when you're on student allowance (not loan)#and your parents still contribute to things for you even though allowance is supposed to be for people whose parents can't afford to help #and you get multiple scholarships a year even though you're technically not eligible for half of them anymore but then as soon as the money #comes in from those you spend it all on a brand new dress for your sister's hen's do picnic because you can't wear the same dress as you #will for the actual hen's night or the wedding. Better buy a full price one at an expensive store instead of looking in a single op shop or #borrowing one from one of your three sisters who are all roughly the same size #god life must be so tough for you getting the same amount of money as the rest of us on student loan except you only have to pay back half #like the only money you have to live off is the same as what the rest of us get + scholarships (plural) plus what you earnt in your summer #internship? how could you possibly survive??#anyway I am NOT a fan of people who are like 'oh you say you have no money for rent but you have a phone?' because that's bullshit #and the whole 'millenials need to stop eating avocado toast so they can buy a house' thing is also bullshit #however. If you pay $60/week for a gym when you have access to the free uni one (or any other gym in the country is like $20)#and you buy uber eats multiple times a week for like $30+ each time despite having a premade meal in the fridge. and you get multiple #scholarships which mean you are arguably among the more well off students. AND you impulse buy things that cost over $100 regularly #then maybe the problem is not that you don't have enough money to split the rental costs of a washing machine (<$3 each/week)#maybe you are just bad with money #which is fine like it's not like it's unfixable it's just annoying when you act like you're worse off than people whose only money is what #they get from student loan each week so they eat beans on rice for dinner for a week #because that's all they could afford (yes I know people who did this. Yes she complained more than them)#so no I don't think I'm gonna be taking financial advice from you babes because one of us has entertained the idea of a budget to help with #finances and it's not you xx #(she turned down offers of financial help/advice/books to borrow from multiple people multiple times. I 100% get that you might not want to #talk to people about it especially your friends but we had multiple books on finances lying around the flat which she always said she didn't #need. And then she'd continue to complain that she didn't have enough money #god forbid you suggest something like going to a cheaper gym (or worse. The perfectly fine free uni gym!)#again. Her gym cost $60/week for most of last year until they brought in a student discount which was 'only' $45/week #the next most expensive gym chain I can find costs maybe $30/week for the highest membership level #to get what she was getting she would only need like a $20 membership #BUT to be fair she wouldn't get such strong culty vibes at any other gym #lol anyway sorry for the rant. I could keep going but apparently you can only have 30 tags and this is the last one

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kuiinncedes · 6 months ago

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me puttingon the filters "remote" and "data science major" on this job site from my university and just scrolling thru and applying to a ton that don't need cover letter without reading the qualifications/requirements 😀

#data science major is enough LMAO i'm slightly qualified at least right #if they get back to me i can read/reconsider LOL #bitch has to write a goddamn cover letter at some point tho lmfao #tmrw i'm getting together w my friend who also needs to apply for jobs i'll surely write a cover letter then right for shore #bro there's this unpaid internship that is like pretty fitting for me #but it's fucking unpaid which is so annoying lmfao #didn't realize it was unpaid until today (i saw it like yesterday lmao)#anyway looked at my email and reminded that i have to reply to an email abt a job i actualy have rn lmao 😭#and just didn't do this semester #but i want/need to get back to it #but i've spent the last week rotting and doing absolutely nothing #idk where the motivation to do things is gonna come from LOL but we gotta do it #i gotta put work time like scheduled out in my gcal or smth to make myself actually do it :\#and even then it probably won't rly happen lol #ig i spent the last while lying here clicking apply -> submit resume to all these jobs that don't need anything else LOL #so i'm not completely doing nothing 😀#i also have done a bunch of club stuff 😀 for the club that i am no longer director for but ya know #i need to wash my hairrrrrrrrrr lmao ;-;#jeanne talks

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dredshirtroberts · 6 months ago

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it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such

#if i say it enough i will remember it's true #can you guess which aspect of capitalism i'm struggling with today?#it does not help my bones are somehow WORSE than yesterday even after all of the rest i took so that's Super Fun:tm:#so i've got that on in the back of my head #ugh #i... am putting off calling my grandma - i meant to do it last week but i got too in my head about it #and uno reversed myself into forgetting to do it at all until the Worst Times Possible #(generally around Normal Fuckin Meal Times)#i want to call to wish her a belated mother's day and check in re: grandpa but also...#also i don't want to have to do a phone call i don't want to talk to them about anything at all #they stress me out to talk to and it makes me super uncomfortable to be on the phone in general let alone with a Heavy Topic over our heads #like.... i'm comfortable with where i'm at acceptance-wise with Grandpa's whole situation #and i know i am late for a better relationship with the pair of them in general #like i'm not going to repair a relationship that wasn't built to collapse down to this point this is as far as it got built up to #i'm not building more relationship between me and someone who i know is passing soon when they didn't take the opportunity either #like they had just as much chance as me to improve our relationship after i became an adult and they chose to use my mother as #an intermediary which has stunted their connection to me and that's not my fault #i admittedly did not reach out but i was not taught i could safely do that to anyone #because my parents badmouth literally any person they know for one reason or another #i regularly fuck up in conversations with my grandparents because i'll say somethign that is a holdover from my understanding of them #through my parents and it's like. kind of really insulting! and i've been doing it my whole life and i know as soon as i get their reaction #and i can't recover because i don't actually know them at all #so i can't be like ''oh my god i know that's inaccurate i have no idea why i said that'' because i *don't* know until after i've done it #every goddamn time it happened the last time i got a call from them too #like... my bio fam/family of origin is just not good at keeping in touch and i know i'm a product of that #and i know theoretically how to adjust for it but it does require work on the other end of the line too #and unfortunately i know my bio family too well and know they won't do their part #i grew up in the group project everyone hates #and i'm on my way to deciding they can show up to the presentation day without me #i've started a new family project over here with blackjack and hookers

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soft-serve-soymilk · 7 months ago

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idk why my brain is suddenly hung up on torturing dism but i'm here for his fraught and tortured questions :)

#it's rare usually I give his brother this kind of treatment #i dig it immensely though :>#yes i am still hung up on that arc 4 ludonarrative harmonious idea from last week #every time it comes to mind it gets worse :D !!#i mean sometimes I forget that Dism's backstory IS traumatic #much of it I would just classify as my childhood (minus the kidnapping obv)#that I forget it leaves scars to be exploited~#bonus points for the Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy though I didn't even know that counted as abusive until recently #i didn't even know that sort of lie about one's health had a name :O #but it leaves fun angles to play with :P #this is your reminder that i can be JUST as remorseless and cruel as you if I so desire~#also even those few snippets i DID write did so much for my understanding of him #what he's so afraid of :)#it makes me want some of those really difficult psychological questions like I answered for Archie that one time #and not even just for him. I appreciate the challenge for any of them. It shows me how strong their personalities are ^^#just pav things #head children my beloved I deserve you but you don't deserve me ^^;#not that Dolphin would give you better treatment................

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