#i did not include this person's username on purpose

[princesssarcastia]

i have no personal or professional experience with OCD or psychology so I can't speak to whether those things can contribute to this specific mentality. but setting that aside;

i fundamentally disagree that the ONLY way you can hold the mentality of, "i am personally responsible for the bad things done by politicians I voted for," is by having some kind of moderate to severe mental illness. I don't agree that it's inherently unhealthy. I don't agree that it automatically leaves you unable to meaningfully navigate through life. I don't agree that it's always dysfunctional. I don't agree that it always means you won't take action, or that you will be unable to substantially change things when you do take action.

in fact, I find that assertion to be kind of insidious! because you cannot abdicate responsibility for the things your government does in your name. you CANNOT. especially when you are one of the people who said, "yes, this is the person I choose to lead us." if you put someone in power then the things they do with that power ARE your responsibility.

I personally believe that we are responsible for each and every thing our leaders do in our name, from our local county sheriff on up to our president. I believe that I am responsible. Because if I am not responsible, then who is?

Obviously our leaders themselves are responsible for the things that they do and say. But when we elect them, we become responsible for the things they do in our name, with our permission.

(Frankly, even though it's wildly unfair, I also believe we are responsible for the things that our leaders do in our name even when we didn't vote for them, but that's a separate, more depressing, much longer conversation involving political theory.)

I'm assuming the person who wrote this is an American who votes for Democrats. I'll also assume that more than a few people who follow me can also be categorized as such. So if that applies to you, let me ask you this: do you think that the people who voted for Trump in 2016 are responsible for the things that he did? And let me tell you: if your answer to that question is no, I kind of don't believe you.

If Kamala Harris is elected, it is inevitable that she will do horrible things in our name. It's our job to take responsibility for that by punishing her for it politically and electorally—I'd say legally, too, but obviously that's a pipe dream, because no American president has ever been legally punished for the horrible things they've done.

The same way that Trump did horrible things in our name, and the same way that we punished him for that politically and electorally and, fingers crossed, legally, though I'm not holding my breath. Did I vote for him? No. Am I, as a person living in America, as an American citizen, still responsible for the things he did? Yeah. Yeah, I am. At the very least, it was and is my responsibility to stop him if i can, and mitigate that harm and remove him from power after the fact if I can't.

My local elected officials, like local elected officials across America right now, are trying to further criminalize homelessness. To make it harder, if not impossible, to exist in the place where I live if you don't have housing. It's despicable. I'm doing my best to try and stop it. These officials are doing this terrible thing in my name! I voted for some of them. I didn't vote for others. But I am responsible for all of their actions, because they're my leaders. What they do with the power I give them, willingly or unwillingly, is my responsibility.

And further, because I'm feeling a little bitchy tonight: the idea that I could feel that way in order to justify my own moral cleanliness is darkly amusing to me. You know what a person would actually have to believe about their leaders in order to still be able to claim that their hands are clean?

They would have to believe that the hold no responsibility for the things the leaders they voted for do once they're in office.

[pierregazly]

but mama, i love him ꨄ oscar piastri smau

oscar piastri x leclerc!reader

the one where oscar's girlfriend has been soft launching their relationship for ages. and he's okay with it, especially if it means he can keep hiding in plain sight from her three overprotective brothers.

ynleclerc

tagged charles_leclerc

liked by charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc, oscarpiastri, and others

ynleclerc omg omg omg... charles leclerc signed my hat? should i add it to the shrine? give them something to sacrifice?

view all comments

username any non-f1 fan would automatically assume ynleclerc is a crazy fan page for charles

username or a charles leclerc hate page... all she does it make fun of her brothers here

username she's offering her signed hat for the tifosi to sacrifice for a CL16 win??? that seems like pure love all around

arthur_leclerc i also signed your hat?

ynleclerc i also do not care? will a hat signed by you get me millions if i sell it for sacrificial purposes?

charles_leclerc what's next? my personal belongings?

ynleclerc is that an offer? if so, oui. i will take what i think will make me the most money next time i'm there, merci <3

scuderiaferrari if it gets us a 1-2 finish, sacrifice everything ynleclerc... please 🙏

username being a Ferrari fan is so satisfying when you remember ynleclerc is an automatic inclusion in everything and anything charles does

username the things i would do to have her as a McLaren fan... she's too beautiful for Ferrari 😭

oscarpiastri a piastri hat will get you good money in straya btw

username oscar??

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, landonorris, mclaren, and others

oscarpiastri 'stop hitting me with the ball on purpose you jerk' was said more times than it should've been, by someone who really just sucks at tennis. had an awesome week back home, time to get back to it 💪

view all comments

logansargeant no wonder you're so worried about getting run over

username the coordinating outfits?? i'm gonna scream, who is she!!!

username what does logan know, tell us your secrets girl logansargeant

username oscar is gonna soft launch this relationship until the end of time. show us her face, you coward!!

ynleclerc did you pay her for all the bruises that tennis ball left?? poor girl

oscarpiastri it's not my fault she's a terrible tennis player, we all know i've offered to pay for a trainer

landonorris so this is why you couldn't come to bali with me 🤨

username lando really said i'm the third wheel??

username to be fair i'd probably pick oscar's girlfriend over lando for a week away too

username girly you don't even know who she is!!! she could be the devil

username i wanna be included in oscar's post week home photo dump :(

ynleclerc has posted a story

liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, pascale.leclerc.355, and others

replies

oscarpiastri you can call me pookie whenever you want if you're gonna post things like this

ynleclerc i'd call you pookie with or without your permission, mon amour

charles_leclerc who is this

charles_leclerc why won't you tell us who you're dating

charles_leclerc we won't hurt him

charles_leclerc answer my texts

ynleclerc

liked by oscarpiastri, pascale.leclerc.355, arthur_leclerc, and others

ynleclerc get you a man who can do both, luckiest woman in the world whenever you're around. mon amour 🤍

view all comments

username people involved in formula 1 and their obsession with soft launching everything NEEDS to be studied

username at least she posts her boyfriend and he isn't just a small figure in the background of every post (charles this is a direct hate comment)

arthur_leclerc this would have been very lovely if it weren't for the last photo

liked by charles_leclerc and lorenzotl

ynleclerc suppose it's a good thing you could easily ignore it. cheers :)

pascale.leclerc.355 trés belle, ma fille 💗

charles_leclerc maman?

username could you IMAGINE if ynleclerc told pascale but obviously hasn't told her brothers? i can FEEL the outrage

username starting to think this may be a driver, ynleclerc is at every race weekend and ALWAYS makes a post with her mystery man at some point during the week after...

username okay ms sleuth (i think it's lando)

username i'm like 65% sure it's oscar, and 35% positive it's someone that looks a lot like oscar

ynleclerc

tagged oscarpiastri

liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, landonorris, and others

ynleclerc someone exposed us on twitter, so i had to expose us on instagram 😮‍💨

comments on this post have been limited

oscarpiastri love you <3

oscarpiastri i will love you even when a ferrari has run me over, of course.

arthur_leclerc is this your way of telling me i was right, without texting me back?

charles_leclerc this must be a joke, non?

pascale.leclerc.355 so very excited to finally be able to invite the both of you for dinner. trés belle 🤍

charles_leclerc maman, you knew?

ynleclerc oscar and i will see you for sunday dinner, maman! <3

tresbelleleclercspam

liked by logansargeant, charles_leclerc, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

ynleclerc live feed of oscar running away from charles in the paddock when he said he 'just wanted to talk, mate'

view all comments

charles_leclerc i truly just wanted to talk about the race

charles_leclerc i did not have a speech planned, non

arthur_leclerc i did have a speech planned

lorenzotl i just wanted to welcome him to the family, as a good big brother should

oscarpiastri my apple watch warned me of an overactive heart rate 5 times today. why did you do this to me. why couldn't you have three sisters???

ynleclerc so very sorry, in our next life i'll try to make sure you only have to worry about sisters and not three overprotective brothers

oscarpiastri as long as i get to spend every lifetime with you <3

i actually got a request for something like this ages ago, and finally got around to finishing it. i so hope you all loved it as much as i loved writing it. thank you for all the support!!

i'm not currently taking requests, but if anyone has lil suggestions or prompts please feel free to send them.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Baby, I'm Cold

Warnings: non/dubcon, and other dark elements. Not all kinks or triggers are tagged. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Summary: Your boss is a stubborn man but even he can get sick. (plus!reader)

Character: August Walker

Day Twenty-One of the December Daze Challenge.

Prompt - I swear I'm not sick

Note: As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

Mr. Walker leaves his bag at the door, his jacket too. You move his shoes so they sit neatly on the drip tray and hang his jacket. You pick up his briefcase and carry it up to his office. As you near the closed door, you hear him coughing from the other side. 

You slow as you approach and knock on the door, “sir, I have your things.” 

He coughs again then calls through hoarsely, “in.” 

You twist the handle and dip inside. You set the bag on the leather armchair where you always do and retreat as your employer sniffles. He lets out a crackly sigh after. He sits behind his desk, silent, stony. His usual self except for the raspy breaths he lets out. 

You don’t await his dismissal. You know if he has to tell you to go, it means you’ve overstayed. Mr. Walker prefers discretion. He prefers solace. It makes your job both easy but difficult. 

You leave and go down to the kitchen. At this time, he won’t have eaten. He’ll need dinner. With his cough and stuffed nose in mind, you prepare him some chicken and rice soup. You put a thick hunk of artisinal bread with it and a cup of tea. 

You carry it up to him and announce your purpose at the door, “dinner, sir.” 

He grumbles. You know his sounds well enough to enter. You bring the tray to his desk as he sits back in his chair, unmoving, eyes closed, hands firm around the rests. You hear the rattle in his chest from there. 

“Anything else, sir?” 

He opens one eye and the icy blue chills you. His single iris flicks down as he considers the tray. He opens his other eye and sits forward. He swallows another cough. 

“What is this?” He touches the mug’s handle. 

“Tea, sir. I found some ginger. I added a touch of honey--” 

“Why?” 

“Why, sir?” 

“I don’t drink tea. I haven’t ever drunk tea. It’s for my mother. So why--” He snaps his mouth shut and his throat strains as he holds back another cough. He lets out a single croak and clears away the rocky crags. “Why are you serving it to me?” 

“Oh, uh, sir, it will soothe your cough--” 

“I’m not sick.” 

“Yes, sir, the air is dry this time of year,” you agree. 

“I don’t want the fucking tea.” 

“Sir.” 

You come around and take the cup. He sits back again and turns the seat away. You hold the steaming cup and quickly head for the door. You stop, remind by his reprimand of something else. 

“Your mother and father will arrive tomorrow morning. I’ve arranged their room and all else.” You confirm. 

“Great, you did your job,” he sneers dryly. 

“Sir,” you murmur and turn to the door. 

Just a few more hours and you’ll be free. It’s the holidays and even Mr. Walker gave you a day to spend with your family. Though you suspect it’s more that he doesn’t want you around his.  

For the three years you’ve worked for him, you’ve never met a single other person in his life. You clean the house, you pick up his laundry, and you order groceries. You are peripheral. You are the tedium that fuels the more concerning parts of his life. 

🌟

Your mother and stepfather are arguing on the porch. Again. Your aunt and uncle are showing off their toddler grandchild, and your brother, the terrible twins, more than a decade your junior, are flipping through their phones. You sit and observe it all. 

You glance at the window, your mom’s anger expounded in the wag of her finger. You get up as the smell of ham draws you into the kitchen. You check to make sure it’s not overdone then piddle around, trying to distract yourself from the chaos. 

Your back pocket rumbles. You ignore it. It’s some promo trying to entice you into ordering food. On Christmas of all day. As the vibration persists, you assume it’s some poor telemarketer, forced to make the rounds for a bit of overtime pay. 

You ignore it. You work on finishing the brussel sprouts your mother left in the strainer. You cut of the ends and slice an X into them. Your phone starts again. You don’t put down the knife until the third call. 

Walker. 

You hesitate but pick up. Why would he be calling, today of all days. You fix your posture as you answer, as if he can see you. 

“Mr. Walker,” you eke out, nervous you might have missed something. 

“Hello, is this...” a woman says your name curiously. 

“Uh, yes, it’s me,” you affirm. 

“Oh, I’m so sorry to bother you, especially today, but we are in need of some help,” her voice is tremulous. 

“I told you,” a male can be heard more distantly. “We shouldn’t bother them. There’s a reason they aren’t here, dear.” 

“Pish,” the woman dismisses. “Very sorry again but my son--” 

“Katherine,” you say, “Mr. Walker’s mother?” 

“Yes, Auggy is my son,” she tuts. “As I was trying to explain, he’s doing rather poorly but he’s refusing my care. He’s always been awfully stubborn, you know?” 

“Kath,” the man drones. 

“Oh, I know, I know,” she squeals at him. “He doesn’t want his mommy fluttering around him like an old hen, but you understand, he’s my baby. I’m worried. And so we were looking and saw your name. A girl’s name so you must be someone special.” 

“Katherine,” the man sighs once more. 

“I’m his housekeeper, ma’am,” you explain. 

“Hum, oh, of course. You would be,” she says. “Oh, my, I’m afraid I’ve assumed so much.” 

“Is he still coughing then?” You ask. 

“Oh, yes, terrible. He sounds as if he’s swallowed glass.” 

“We’ll call a doctor,” the man intones. 

“Octavius, please, which doctor do you suggest we call? They all fly out of the country on their salaries,” she chirps. “Honey, please, if you don’t mind, you might be able to coax him. If you are his maid, you’d only be doing your job. He can’t turn you away.” 

You frown. She doesn’t know how wrong she is. He would and he will. 

“Lucine, please,” your step father’s voice blows through with a gust as he comes inside. His anger is forged into his tone and the door slams. You wince. 

“I can be there,” you tell Katherine. It won’t make a difference but it will get you away from all this. 

🌟

Katherine as good as drags you through the door. You didn’t even knock before she swung it open. She’s a tall woman, plump, and her face is rosy. She’s not what you expect. 

“Yes, come in, come in,” she says. “Oh, what’ve you brought?” 

She gestures to the canvas bag on your elbow. 

“Just some stuff to help,” you explain as the warmth of inside seeps beneath the chill in your cheeks. “Hopefully.” 

“Oh, yes, how clever of you.” 

She takes the bag and you let her. She sets in on the bench and unbuttons your top button before you can stop her. You gently catch her hands then do the rest yourself. 

“Sorry, dear, sorry. It’s only, I’m so worried.” 

“He’s a man, he’ll be fine. If you’d stop pecking at him, he wouldn’t be hiding,” a man appears in the archway to the den. He’s big like Mr. Walker, with white hair and paler eyes. He crosses his arms in the same way. That must be the father. 

“He’s sick! You heard him. He wouldn’t listen--” 

“He was doing just fine, Katherine.” 

“Tosh, you don’t know that. You never were there when he was home sick. He needs his orange juice and chicken noodle.” 

“He needs you to stop,” the man you assume is Octavius reproaches. 

“I can check on him but... it’s probably just a cold,” you say as you slip out of your boots. 

“So long as you try.” 

“Right,” you grab the bag and twist the handles. 

You go to the bottom of the stairs and look up. You peer side to side, from mother, to father, both tentatively watching you in turn. It seems Walker puts everyone at arm’s length. 

You take the first step with trepidation. Then the second. Up and up, you climb until you reach the top. You turn down the hallway and come to the office door. You bite the inside of your lip and knock. You don’t get an answer. 

You look at the bag in your hand and contemplate running back downstairs. You can say you tried and got the same result. Still, that Walker doesn’t shout for you to scram is worrying. 

You knock again to the same result. Several more taps go unanswered before you are faced with another decision. Do you go in, just to make sure? 

It would be a waste. You left your family, Katherine waited around for you, you suppose you can brave Walker’s wrath to give her the gift of knowing all is well. 

You inhale and hold it in. You enter the office, peeking through as you do. It’s dim but for the light of the glass lamp on the desk. As you look for the broad figure behind it, you find only an empty chair. 

You frown. He must be in his room or-- 

The grumble jars you. You squint as you try to see through the dark. You find Mr. Walker on the leather settee near the artificial fireplace set into the wall. Great. You should go. You can do that still. He’s not answering you so obviously he doesn’t want to be disturbed. 

He coughs, a sharp, agonizing cough that makes even your throat hurt. You let your breath out. Ugh. He’s a big boy, literally, he can handle it. Right? 

Shit. 

You cross the room and turn the dial on the artificial fireplace. It lights up, casting a soft glow over the office. You turn to find Walker shivering on the cushions, arms crossed as he hugs himself, legs bent to accommodate the short furniture. 

“Mr. Walker, I brought some cough drops and some cold medicine,” you say.  

He groans and doesn’t move. He hacks again, the couch frame creaking under his weight. Why? You shouldn’t feel bad for him. Not for as unpleasant as he’s consistently been. 

You move a leather stool closer and sit. You cradle the bag on your knees and sift through the contents. You take out the bottle of Buckleys. You shake it and reach with your other hand to touch his shining forehead. His eyes pop open and his mustache twitches. 

“Mr. Walker, I have cough syrup--” 

“I’m fine,” he insists, only to cough again. “I don’t want that—sh-- *cough*-- shi-- *cough*” He devolves into a fit and you wait patiently. 

“If you don’t want it, you should try some of these ginger drops.” 

“Why are you here?” 

You steady your agitation. “Your mother called me.” 

“Why did she--” He can’t finish the question. 

“She asked me to help you. I’m trying but I can’t do much if you won’t let me. However, you are my boss so you can tell me to go back home to my family,” you shrug. 

He looks at you then closes his eyes. He shifts onto his back and lifts his legs, extending them over the armrest. He is ridiculous big on the short sofa. 

“Do whatever. I thought you were a maid, not--” 

He can’t finish the insult but you get the gist. You dig around in the bag and take out the tin of menthol rub. You uncap it as his face contorts in an effort to repress his coughing. You hold it out under his nose and he sucks in and flinches. 

He grabs his nose as you recoil and blinks, “what is that?” 

“Just menthol, it will clear your airways a bit.” 

“Oh,” he furrows his dark brows. 

“Typically, you put it on your chest but it’s kind of greasy so--” 

“Do that,” he insists and sniffs deeply, “it’s helping.” 

“Oh, uh...” you stare at him. 

He’s sallow, the brims of his eyes reddened, and his face drawn. You nod and lightly touch the gel. You hesitate. You won’t be able to reach him and... right. 

“Can you...” You look at his shirt collar, “unbutton.” 

He coughs again, a rumble in his chest, and he clumsily pinches his buttons until he frees them. He pulls the fabric apart to reveal his furry chest and you stand. You move closer and bend over him as you gently trace beneath his throat, that little crook of bone above his muscled pecs. You focus on spreading the menthol as he breathes deeper, further puffing out his chest. 

“Better?” You ask. 

He makes a noise, something akin to a purr. You rub the cream in until It’s absorbed then pull away. You cap the container and put it back in the bag. You put it all on the stool and back away. 

“Where are you going?” Walker mutters. 

“To wash my hands,” you say. 

“Mmm, be quick.” 

You take his orders and hurry out. You come down the hallway and dip into the bathroom to rinse your hands. As you dry off, you nearly squeal as a shadow appears in the door. Katherine wrings her hands as she shifts back and forth. 

“Is he okay?” She asks. 

“He’s fine, I think. Just sick. Stubborn.” 

“Oh, very,” she agrees with your last statement. 

“I’m just trying to get him to take some cough meds,” you explain. 

“Ah, good luck,” she trills, “I will make some tea, if you like?” 

“Uh, yeah, we can try that,” you agree. 

She hurries off and you go back down the hall. The smell of menthol and the crackle of the fake fire welcome you in. You go to the settee as Walker lays quietly, breathing in and out, as his shirt remains open. 

“I think the cough syrup will help,” you say. 

He doesn’t respond. You watch the cadence of his chest. Is he asleep. You move around slowly, trying not to knock anything with your hip or step too heavy. You gather up the bag. He can probably sleep it off. 

You let out a squeal as you feel a brush against your bum. You spin as Walker’s arm extends to you and he catches your hip. You stutter in surprise. 

“S-sir!” 

“I’m sick,” he whines, though the surrender is hardly a triumph. “Please...” 

You stare at him. You don’t know what’s worse. The brave face or the pathetic victim. 

“Baby, I feel so bad,” he squeezes and you look down at his large hand. He must be really sick if he’s calling you that. 

“It’s alright, Mr. Walker,” you take his hand and move it off your hip. You lower yourself onto the edge of the couch and bend his arm over his chest. “Your mom’s going to make you some tea.” 

“Mmmm,” he drones and reaches for you again. “Don’t leave.” 

“Sir,” you look down as his touch follows your sleeve to your shoulder then curls down your back, stopping on your waist. You grab his wrist again. “I’ll stay, just... relax.” 

“Yes, baby,” his fingers dip into your soft side, “whatever you want me to do.” He tugs free of your grip and trails along the top of your butt, “just stay.” 

You narrow your eyes and once more stop his stray hand. You cling to it as you direct it away from you, keeping hold of him to keep from another rogue groping. He’s sick for sure. So sick, he must be delusional. 

“Alright, I'm here, Mr. Walker.” 

He opens his eyes and looks at you. You wince at the intensity in his glassy irises. His cheek ticks and he hums again. 

“Mm...” he drawls weakly. “So... soft.” 

[hyperfixingfr]

IF THE USER "pencilholderarts" SENDS YOU A REQUEST; PLEASE BLOCK THEM!

The fact that this is still a major issue is so concerning. This kid has purposely changed their username and front numerous times in an attempt to make people forget what they did, and trick people who don't know what they did into giving them free art. They send these requests to so many artists you almost wonder if they're trying to create an army of free art. It's really weird, and they clearly seem to believe that they're ENTITLED to art. People have tried to explain to this kid what they've done wrong numerous times, believing that they were an innocent kid who fell victim to the internet's "strict morals". However, each person who has tried to do this has given up after realizing they DON'T WANT TO CHANGE.

One of the biggest fools they're trying to do is pretend nothing happened to get forgiveness. They have BEGGED people who have blocked them in DMs on other social medias to unblock them and forgive them. They even stalked me onto a social that I never even mentioned having online to beg me to forgive them. They put "proship/incest DNI" in their bio to make artists who don't know what they did believe that they are against this stuff. However, they've defended themselves asking artists to draw proships numerous times. They even told me DIRECTLY in DMs that they ship a few pairs of siblings. They've been defending themselves having requested incest as recent as yesterday (as of this post), so I assure you this isn't just old stuff taken out of context. They will get really creepy with people really fast.

Please, if you see anyone mention them, take a request from them, or interact with them, let them know what they've done! They're manipulative, a liar, and a con-artist. They want your drawings, don't give it to them, please. I will include any username changes below this, and will add to it if they ever change their username again. You can also find more information about what they've done + the proof of it all by searching these old usernames. This kid shouldn't be online.

- kndbrainrot

- pencilholdersilly

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for seeking out my ex to apologise to them?

For context, I had a long term (over 6 years) relationship with someone when I was younger (i was 21 and they were 20 at the time of our breakup, both nonbinary). They asked me out when we were both barely even teenagers, and in a way we grew up together. They were a great partner, and we were both very dedicated to each other. However I went through a lot of mental health struggles while we were together including a lot of suicidal ideation and some attempts, and eventually they asked to break up as they felt our relationship was becoming stressful for them and that I was relying on them too much/being too codependent.

At the time I was a little confused and upset, but I had always clearly made it a condition of our relationship that either of us could leave if we wanted to and had no obligation to stay. So in the end our breakup was pretty amiable, just sad, and we went our separate ways. In hindsight, our relationship was definitely unhealthy for both of us, and my mental health has ironically improved a huge amount since we broke up. So they were 100% right about it not being healthy, and I have nothing but respect for them.

In the years since, I have often felt guilty about how I treated them and wished I could make up for it/take back how I behaved. I never tried to hurt them on purpose but I would vent to them constantly without considering how they felt, and in general I think I took them for granted and would treat them more like a therapist than a partner, when they had their own issues too and I should have never made them feel responsible for mine like that. Neither of us were perfect, but I feel I definitely hold a lot of the blame for how things ended up. I don't think I had the emotional maturity at the time to realise how unhealthy our dynamic had become, whereas they did, and I think both of our lives have become better as a result of us breaking up.

It's been a couple of years since we broke up. They haven't changed any of their social media usernames or blocked me etc, so I could still reach out to them if I wanted to without having to block evade or anything weird like that. Part of me really wants to send them some kind of apology or something, so that they know they're a good person who did the right thing and that I'm sorry for my past behaviour.

However, part of me also recognises that I probably represent a dark period in their life, and that they likely just want to move on and forget about me. For this reason, I worry that apologising would be a selfish move on my part to just assuage my own feelings of guilt, but would only serve to stress/creep them out or hurt them further, which is the last thing I would want to do.

So, would I be the asshole for reaching out to them to apologise? Is it better to leave things alone, or would it be helpful for them/give them closure to hear an apology from me? It would be really helpful to hear people's perspectives on this, especially people who have been on the "other side" of a situation like this.

[traineecryptid]

NPSS Weibo Q&A (20240831) Part 1

This is a Q&A session held on Weibo. People will tag their questions with the hashtag #南派三叔藏海花在线答疑# (#NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#) and NPSS will look through the tag to pick some to answer. The event started at 1500 hours on 2024 August 31st. For comedic purposes, this translation will include the timestamps for the answers. And for efficiency purposes, I have left out all usernames. The usernames of the question-askers can be found via the screenshots in this folder if anyone is inclined to do that.

1422 Come ask questions at #NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#. I will stay online and pick questions to answer without limits from 3pm onward. 1500 Q: Sanshu, what was the thing that Zhang Qiling wanted Pangzi to tell Wu Xie that Pangzi mentioned when he was fixing Wu Xie’s dislocated shoulder? My friends and I would love to know. 

A: Eat well, sleep well, wear socks even in the summer. 1500 Q: Lei, do you like this pic I made? [It’s an edit of NPSS’s face on a pink dressed magical girl body]

A: I feel like this pic is affecting the fengshui in my house.

1502 Q: Shu, it is confirmed that Ten Years is included in the ZHH drama. Then, will the drama show the changes between ZHH Wu Xie and Ten Years Wu Xie? In yesterday’s livestream you said that there are four turning points in the drama. Is it that Wu Xie will become Xie Di after being tricked four times? A: Every character and their fate all have big turning points. Whether he’s a good person or an evil person, whether his answers are real or fake, you must watch till the end [only then you’ll know].

1502 Q: Sanshu, what was Wu Xie thinking in the split second when he saw Menyouping’s portrait in Tibet? A: “What the fuck!” (T/N: swears are not very translatable in meaning. I tried.) 1503

Q: Pumpkin Sect (T/N: this might be an intentional typo punning of nanpai which means southern sect), what would the scene be like if Xiaoge’s mom met Wu Xie? Would Bai Ma be happy that her child had gained some humanity because of Wu Xie? A: Bai Ma would probably teach Wu Xie to sing. Something like The Night of Ulaanbaatar.

1505 Q: Shu, why have you been answering so many questions lately? Has there been some big thing happening?

A: They said that I’m a liuliang celebrity so I should shoulder the publicity mission. (T/N: Liuliang celebrity refers to celebrities who are popular (or controversial) and are able to generate a lot of social media traffic. For example: when a celeb would get on the trending searches whenever they post selfies/ attend events/ do just about anything.)

1513 Q: What would Mo Yungao from Southern Archives do if he had really found Xiaoge? A: He would eat Zhang Qiling.

1523 Q: Is the audience viewing experience taken into deep consideration when making drama and movie adaptations? For example, allowing those who haven't read the novels to understand the plot. I saw some people saying that they couldn’t follow the plot [from the drama].

A: For Reboot, in order to help the audience get into it, we introduced the characters and their occupation in the first episode. But for ZHH,  according to the number of votes, we all chose to do a cold open based on the novel. 

1524 Q: Sanshu, Sanshu, I want to know, based on Zhang Qiling’s arm strength, how many Wu Xies can he carry?

A: If he uses the strength from his waist to assist, he can throw Wu Xie up to the third floor.

1526 Q: What is the ending for Boss Jiao in the Reboot novel?

A: Became Jiao. (T/N: The character for Jiao means burnt).

1527 Q: Will Xu Zhenxuan play Wu Xie in the Heavenly Palace re-shoot?

A: Yes.

1528

Q: Shu, did Zhang Haike recommend Xiaoge’s drink to Wu Xie because he wants to show off that he understands Xiaoge? A: Hahahahaha

1532 Q: ZHH drama and novel will have two separate endings. Now that the drama has an ending, have you decided on the ending of the novel? When will you experience Tianshou? A: I always understood the dramas as the dreams of the characters from the books. That means that the changes in details in the dramas, to me, I would always explain it as the intentional and unintentional amendment to the details as they tell this story to someone else. Or that these are part of their dream and after-the-fact fears. I will explain it again after [you] see the end.

1533

Q: I would like to know the mental state of the company. It seems like it’s taking big steps towards a beautiful direction.

A: It’s rare to be able to legally go crazy. Everyone’s very happy.

Here's the first 15. There are more answers and I will chip at them at a pace that will hopefully be able to keep up with NPSS. The folder also contains a google doc that has all the complied Q&As if anyone prefers to read on that.

[kooktrash]

just an insight on what writers have to deal with in regards to inclusivity for everyone:

I’ll start off by saying I’m obvi hiding their username for anonymity but I just wanna show yall what it’s like to be a writer these days on tumblr 💀

I’ve never explicitly said my writing is only for poc or only for white. I purposely try and leave that out of my writing bc I want everyone to feel included. the sugar daddy fic this user is referring to is I believe Lace & Luxury where I never once said it was a black character. does this mean I would never write a black/poc character? ofc not, it just means that I don’t specify race/ethnicity, etc or how will it be inclusive for all? and the immediate jumping to conclusions bc a character in my fic has y2k style or bc of a moodboard pic [of a white person with a heavy tan I found off pinterest] leads the idea that it’s poc is weeeiiiiirrrrrddddd bc even if it was, i don’t see how it would be such a problem to read the tags

if anything I feel like there should be MORE writing for poc

this person is talking about wanting “inclusivity” but they’re upset that a character might be a poc or overweight bc it doesn’t describe them?

finally this strange need to be a victim by saying “do you have a grudge against skinny people” literally BAFFLED ME, bc I went on their blog where they reblogged a post about how skinny people are ignored LIKE WHATTTTT

I’ve been reading fanfiction since I was 13 in 2014 and I could never read a story about a brown character but there were a billion carbon copy fics of a blonde/ginger, skinny main character. I would read them bc what other option did I have? that’s why this upsets me because one)

I don’t ever specify my character’s race/color/weight so for someone to make assumptions and then message me trying to ask me to change the way I write is weeeeeirrrrdddd. I’m not a professional, I write for fun and if there are blogs out there that only specifically write for poc or heavier set people, DONT READ THEM IF YOU DONT LIKE THEM

suddenly all these readers want to delegate how a writer creates a story when it used to be that we had readers BECAUSE they liked the way we wrote, not bc they want to change it

this is what poc people have gone through for yearrrrrrrrrrrrrsssssssss:

and like I said, I try and be inclusive and never describe someone’s physical traits unless it’s in the most indirect way but I completely respect and acknowledge writers who do specifically make works for poc readers or readers with a certain type of body type [that was never written before in fanfics]

I also don’t care if people think I’m rude, I’m literally Mexican with tan skin and black hair and if I wanted to write works that’s “not inclusive to white/skinny people” I would’ve done that by now, but that’s not my goal so pls don’t try and paint my writing to be for one target audience

[minerwarfare-suzuya]

😪🥱😴

I'm caught up with what's going on lol. Just been busy yesterday and barely had time to respond hours ago.

I was told that Red's video had received a report for a privacy complaint which was posted about that morning.

Following up to this is a comment made by Cagney on the video saying she made the report for Kevonica which has been posted onto the community tab of his channel.

Though this isn't the first of Cagney reaching out yesterday. Prior to this I had received messages that I didn't get to look at until making this post yesterday. Cagney made an alternative account under the same name but with an "s" included. This is the message she had left for me to read.

1. You know I would be totally fine with the fact that her socials were to be censored when criticized over minor flaws but given all things considered. She accused Red of Sexual Harassment for things that happened years ago while completely disregarding the fact she still was reaching out to him to only excuse it in her video that she forgot about his past behavior, made him and I out to be pedophiles, kept forcing her own perspective upon our own work with twisted thoughts and above all that she still proceeded to post a response video two days afterwards which totally defeats the purpose of having to remain private/unknown online especially given how she shared that video by linking it in her tweet on Twitter.

Top it off, she still has the decency to still lurk onto Red's profiles. So, she is far from moving on lol.

2. Ah yes! "I want my socials censored for privacy purposes" *proceeds to post a response video and tweets about it publicly days later*-

Yeah, how contradictory...

As for the reasons why Kev wanted her original username and current one censored. I kept it private considering how personal they were but after those two days passed and I saw how things unfolded, you can totally look past that and see it could've been done to take advantage of the situation to her convenience. Like she still made a video response and tweeted about it, it doesn't matter how she edits the video to prevent her old username being shown. She's still making herself have public attention over it for just about anyone to find her no matter the following being big or small.

Honestly, the funny thing about this is when someone in particular asked for their socials to be censored they were rejected of it. Doesn't feel nice when the shoe is on the other foot because now it’s a whole ass problem.

3. Bringing up when I showed Blurry and Zombify screenshots of what went down in the community because of how much y'all talk shit behind people's backs is wild especially given how Zombify did take offense to Victor's own remarks about them when Zombify didn't agree with Kev's attempts to give Blurry negative attention on biased opinions of his own different takes for characters he drew in his own depiction along with other things. Besides that I can see that leaking screenshots of what went on during discussion did fuck up on someone's day over a group practically doxxing Victor and attempting to harass them. Yet you guys attempted to stalk Zombify's account daily when they sided with Blurry and over speculated on their Twitter activities to harass them which you are doing the same with Red and I activities online.

Now of course, Cageny made a post on her blog to follow up with everything.

Most of the things that are said go over the mention of stuff that I just went over.

Kevonica's desire to have her name censored when Cageny reached out to me for a request on Red's video to have changes for Kev's online safety concerns from what's shown in our conversation. As previously mentioned, there are numerous contradictions regarding this issue. For instance, she uploaded a video two days after our last discussion, which, despite any editing she may have done to mitigate risks, remains a public response accessible to anyone, including Red's video. Furthermore, her Twitter post promoting her video prior to making her account private effectively draws attention to herself and her art that is publicly available for viewing which looks no different to her old work from 2017. Having a game on steam that she promotes publicly with the same art style presented in her sprites which features the same art style in her sprites, linking back to both her current and past accounts. Like if you search up the name "TheNutcrackerus" on Google, her old Instagram pops up and all her work that she's made is relevantly still on there that can link back to her current account.

https://www.instagram.com/thenutcrackeruss?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Search up "TheNutcrackerus" on Twitter, her "Kevonica" account can instantly be found from people responding to her account. It's not like Kevonica wants to hide from the public when there is more than a clear indication that she wants her brand name known even if she abandons the previous one. Her making the claims of wanting her social media accounts private on a video presenting criticism against her is quite contradictory.

Following up with this post is that Cagney says Red is milking the situation when it's advertisement that is no different to Kev doing the same on Twitter and Cagney admittedly says that she made the Privacy report complaints for Kevonica in her comment that I have previously shown. Red and I both looked at the timestamps and literally nothing on those time-stamps breaks YouTube guidelines for a privacy complaint.

3:00-3:50 - Literally just Kev's old profile picture from the Thenutcrackerus account transitioning to her current one.

7:07-7:14 - Kev's conversation with Mobox87 on Discord.

24:48-24:53 - A beginning of Kev and Red's conversation reuniting communication.

33:30-36:05 - The same issue as 3:00-3:50 but in reverse. Kev's current profile picture is shown and transitions to her old one from TheNutcrackerus account.

This is honestly just shutting us up at this point. No matter what context you put in. This is shutting people up from their own criticism against Kev by abusing the YouTube report system to your own convenience.

Now of course, above all that she decides to add in an unrelated topic to make a similarity out of it. That being my gaming channel being terminated and showing off tweets from Red and I made to get an appeal.

Okay first off, this should be irrelevant to the argument given how this is just you over speculating on the smallest thing to complain about and to justify an argument in your response. Two, Red made a minor error when posting that tweet without realizing to edit the screenshot of a complaint in support of trying to bring back an old gaming channel so that YouTube's automated system doesn't address that email is being shown. Three, Why the FUCK would I be worried over my email being censored or not when it's the same email anyone can see publicly from the document I've posted about Kevonica? You can literally press the three dots on my document and see my email including Red's along with the activity log of when it was opened and edited. The same shit can apply to Kev's document including the Mobox87's archive evidence folder which shows her old email that is clearly still being used to this day!

Then of course, they mentioned my NSFW being censored. Uh duh, it breaks YouTube guidelines to show NSFW plus in my document I linked Kev's document and in our folders about Kev we have her documents from when she first uploaded it and when she updated it.

Plus, the only person in "history" who reports Red for Privacy Violation is Arion (Blue's Journey) which has been stated on my pinned thread on my Twitter account, My document and both videos that Red and I made about Arion, Cagney. FUCKEN Dumbass.

Anyways, I find this situation quite amusing due to the extent to which this new argument contradicts all previous assertions presented to us. The hypocrisy is particularly evident when compared to the topics they have addressed in the past.

[maribatawareness]

A Confessional: Fandom Awareness

It is currently 6:00pm EST, November 29th, 2024, as I am writing this. (7:15pm, December 5th, 2024, for post) This is something I have needed to write for a while, and I finally found the strength to do so. 

What I would like to discuss is the Maribat Tumblr scene and events of earlier this year.

~ As a disclaimer, this is not being made to send harassment or hate. Its purpose is to enlighten the fandom of my personal experiences, including what I have witnessed myself. None of the following will be anything but my own testimony and pieces accessible by members of the fandom. ~

I, the one writing this as well as runner of this account, am Stilly. Otherwise known as ScarletImpulse on Ao3 and Discord and VelveteenShadow on Tumblr. 

Why am I putting this out there with a new account versus using my own tumblr? It, my personal tumblr, was blocked by the blog that is arguably seen the most on this platform. The blocking was due to the following.

Back in February, the 2023 Maribat Awards’ Nominations List was released. One of my pieces was nominated but not accepted due to a relationship being tagged in the piece. A lot unfolded from there and I would like to own up to my side of it.

In the moment, I was saying things with no weight behind them when it came to any words I used. I had said that the event was biased, had favoritism, should have different mods, and was unfair due to the reasoning given for my piece not making it into the category whilst another fic was accepted. 

Someone left a reply to the post right off to get clarification. The reason I did not speak up myself is I was afraid that the reason for my piece not making it into the one category (Rare Pairs) would then disqualify it, thus removing it, from another category (Favorite Fic). 

The clarification given to the person was rather vague. After that, it spiraled into another person asking with rather inappropriate, strong language and the OG blog giving nearly the same energy back. A couple key things were said that were extra that read as rude, there is the use of “favoritism” which most likely was used in reference to my reactionary words, and a specific thing that I would like to specify on.

~ “...I had said that if they changed the tags we would be willing to add them back in.” (Another Mod, February 3rd, 10:01 am)

This part was never said directly before. I, nor anyone, was told that if I changed my fic tags that it could be accepted. The only mention of tags by the blog were these two following ones in separate reblogs.

~ “I do not read all of the fics submitted, and rely on authors tagging their works appropriately.

As a reminder, tagging works appropriately is important for readers so they are not misled.” (Main Mod, February 2nd, 6:45pm)

~ “Instead, I would suggest tagging the Timari in the Additional Tags part of AO3, or even as ‘Minor Tim/Marinette Dupain-Cheng’, that way fic readers and mods alike will not mistake it for something it is not next time.” (Another Mod, February 2nd, 8:44pm)

I was also not reached out to about this problem. A lot of what went down could have been solved by being clear about the tag changing and/or reaching out to me to resolve the issue. Instead, they reference information that could only be known by being in the server I said all of my frustrations through. 

There is no way they should have had access to what I said because none of the individuals associated with the blog at the time were within that server when it went down. (Even so, I should not have said the things I did and I own up to that.) It also shows they were aware of my discord account so I could be reasonably reached.

The blocking itself? That came from them seeing someone share out my Tumblr username through a different discord entirely. At least in that case, the individuals were also in there. 

I was not the only one who got blocked during that stretch. I cannot speak for them, nor will I. However, I can say that the public was blocked in a sense from the situation because reblogs (where the conversation went down) were hidden. They can now only be found through the reblogs of others.

I am accepting and confirming all of that further in this google doc to show versus purely tell and prove I am not free of innocence for my actions during that. It is so important for people in the fandom to be aware that it happened. Both sides of that made mistakes. They need to be held accountable for it. 

There are a couple more interesting things that sprouted that I will mention briefly here but will be expanded upon in the doc. Once again, this is for fandom awareness.

The access to a discord they were not a part of was used to send screenshots of what I said during the heat of the situation to yet another discord which got me banned from it. I was not allowed to even ask for further information or clarification because I was told through a bot message and the one mod I knew had their dms set to friends only. 

“A concerned member sent the [server name] staff several screenshots of you publicly threating physical harm against other members of our server. This is not acceptable behavior in what should be a fun, safe space to enjoy fandom.

This directly violates the rules of our server & is egregious enough to bypass prior warnings. Our mod team has made the decision that it is in the best interests of protecting our server members to remove you. Thank you. This decision cannot be appealed.” (Dyno Bot, February 8th, 8:13 pm)

There’s nothing else for me to speak upon for that. The message is between the bot and I so if the server wished for me to not share that out, perhaps banning without a prior warning would prevent that. 

Another thing that came from the situation was an account named “Dike” on Tumblr. It put out a nicely written transcript essentially of what happened and the sides of things. 

This has since been deleted. 

This is another example of something that was said in the fandom’s tumblr space that has been forced to live in reblogs of others. However, the person, Dike (who I will not disclose without permission), had asked me as well as one of the individuals associated with the situation to read over the google doc of the mock trial. I saw things from Dike being deleted and took action to make a copy.

This is the copy of the original google doc posted by Dike with all the information perfectly intact from when it was first written. It was given by him to the public once so regaining your access to it should not cause a problem. However, it does make it easy to identify who Dike is, so I am going to link you to a reblog that saved it from fully disappearing instead.

Reblog of Dike’s OG Post

Please check that out for more information on that situation specifically. It does a great job at laying it out.

All of this I wanted to bring up because it is imperative for the fandom to know what a certain blog on Maribat Tumblr with influence has done. This is not to go throw hate on them. It is to give awareness.

The original purpose of the blog (as far as I am aware) was to make calendars for the fandom. Since then, it has evolved to do awards and other events. That’s amazing.

A problem, however, is the sharing of events that can come across as selective. They do their own events then only one other Maribat tumblr’s has been shared by the blog. That would not be inherently bad if they did not make such an effort to get the attention of the fandom.

Finding events run for Maribat as a fandom can be done relatively easily with the tagging feature in tumblr. Only sharing out the two places makes it an even harder time for events run by other fandom tumblrs to get traction though.

It also does not help that the blog blocked one of those other fandom tumblrs. To remind, I am speaking only for myself, so I purely know this because I am the owner of the Maribat Menagerie tumblr and I was searching to see if 2024 awards were posted yet, just to be met with a “ghost blog” message. If there are any others who have experienced the same, it is on them to speak on it.

Once again, this is boiling down to making it harder on others in the fandom getting that traction to more of the fandom. Without a typically checked Tumblr of the fandom sharing things, it gets left to the algorithm which only tends to favor polls.

One last related piece to the topic is a discord server list that was made by the blog. It is yet another case of not being inherently bad in its target purpose but has been used rather strangely.

The fandom may not be aware that the list has been edited throughout the months since its release. There is a note that states “All links posted with server permission prior to adding” which is important to know as I talk on this.

This list is made to help the fandom find discords because minus those with a Tumblr related to their discord, fic links are the only real go to place to find them, which can be a game. 

The problem I have, which may not be one to others, is how the list has changed while still not including more less member-heavy servers beyond their own. I understand and respect the decision to only include those who have given permission. It is just weird that at least one that was originally on the list has been removed then replaced.

In fact, this occurred just days ago as far as I am aware. Originally, the “Daminette” server, that was featured since the list was made, was changed out with “League of Daminette” which you can find out through checking any reblog under the original post with a date before November 24th, 2024. 

Mentioning the servers is relevant because I found that out after making this tumblr and checking the 2024 Maribat Awards. That announcement post was also changed after originally being posted with the only difference being a server link.

Let me preface, having a server link in a post is totally fine. It is how it is in the post that seems a bit unnecessary for an announcement of a nomination form, not a server. Having “Come join us on discord” the same color and font size as the nomination form link is a choice. That is going to catch people’s eyes and they will most likely miss the “Nominations open until January 15th” in small text in between them.

It is also when that is important to mention for that part above. The addition of the link happened after the nomination form was shared around to multiple places. I found out due to it being shared within the Menagerie. Whether or not that was on purpose or just a case of them forgetting, I cannot speak on. However, it is worth mentioning that if it was not, then that is quite the timing and coincidence.

Ultimately, everything I have written out for you here is for your benefit. The Maribatter who decided to read this. Take all of this information as you want. I am not in charge of who, how, why you interact with the fandom. I want this fandom space to allow people to make their own choices.

As a last word, I hope that if any of the persons who may have a problem with what I have brought up publicly consider saying this should have been handled privately, they take a moment to realize that their chance was lost when they put their side out publicly then tried to hide it (whether intentionally or not, I will not assume).

Sincerely, Scarlet “Stilly” Impulse

(Finished: 9:09pm, November 29th, 2024)

Confessional: Maribat Fandom Awareness Google Doc

[the-lonelybarricade]

TheLonelyBarricade FAQ

I saw @whatishowedyouinthedark make one of these and have been debating making my own ever since! 💕

Do you have a posting schedule?

No. Currently none of my projects are pre-written, meaning I write each chapter from scratch before it gets posted. The frequency of my updates relies entirely on my available free time and mental capacity.

When will you update A Court of Faded Dreams?

I don't know! Each time I'm asked, my motiviation to do so curls and shrivels up just a little bit more.

Are you still working on A Court of Faded Dreams?

Yes! Contrary to some of the comments I've recieved, ACoFD is NOT abandoned. But wrapping up that project is a massive undertaking. Please, please be patient with me.

When will you update x fic?

Whenever my motiviation perfectly aligns with the emotional, mental, and physical contraints of the outside world

Do you accept prompts?

You're welcome to send me prompts, but please don't do so with the expecation that they'll always get fulfilled.

Why haven't you responded to my ask/message/comment?

I promise it's not personal! I'm just a girl with ADHD who can feel a little overwhelmed about answering a lot of messages (and who can be very forgetful). I'm so appreciative of all the messages I get in their various forms, and I wish I had the emotional capacity to answer all of them. In my head, I'm kissing anyone who's ever said something nice to me very tenderly right on their forehead.

As for my ask box, I encourage you to treat it like casting a letter in a bottle into the ocean. Half the fun is wondering if you'll ever get a response!

Are people allowed to translate your fics?

Not without my explicit permission.

Are you okay with people binding your fics?

I will only consent to my fics being bound BY HAND for personal use. That means I do not condone for any money to be exchanged in order to produce a bound copy of my fics. That includes online binding services like lulu as well as Etsy binders who claim to only charge 'for materials', both of which are infringements on SJM's copyright.

I've talked more about this here.

Are you okay with people making or comissioning fanart of your fics?

Yes, but there's one stipulation: if you do this, I'll have no choice but to marry you

What are your favorite acotar fics/authors/blogs?

I'm so glad you asked! I have a recommendation list here.

Where does your username come from?

It's a reference to Empty Chairs at Empty Tables from Les Miserables!

What are your pronouns?

She/her

What sexuality do you identify as?

Alexa, play "Sweater Weather"

Are you and @separatist-apologist actually married?

Yes. In fact, my profile picture is from our wedding 😌 (but for legal purposes: no)

How did you and MB become friends?

it's a very emotional story that all started with a penis

[viivenn]

If that was your intention, you should've blocked her @. Because I saw a bunch of people harassing her on twitter for no reason ever since she showed up, and she never said anything untrue. Even the info she shared about Giles is public info, you can read online anywhere and everyone is free to like and dislike people. Her feelings about Giles is clearly not a problem for Gwendoline. Everything you said about sharing old nude stuf is real, writing dirty fanfics about her is disgusting, but if you wanted to use that girl's tweet as an example, you should've blocked her @ specially because she never did any of those things you mentioned. I know you want to be correct on this, but you have to be fair and just. There was tons of other examples way more serious you could've used, and far be it from me to defend Beca, I don't know her. But I follow her and I at least know what she stands for and she'll definitely be by your side on all of this.

please stop taking my post out of context. this was not a call out post. i used a post as an example and included the username, i was not being disrespectful by using an example.

there’s a difference between wanting to be just and right, and it’s that i know my intent is just and i know i’m right. if you think these sort of things are okay, then perhaps it’s you who is wrong and unjust. i was not purposely aiming to be disrespectful and start arguments with people over a post that highlighted my concerns and discomforts about this fandom, i wanted to discuss this in a peaceful context because that’s what everyone deserves is a conversation and not a heated debate. bur if you really want to go down that route. of colourful words exchanged, then fine, allow me to be the bad guy for a moment.

i don’t believe your friend is friends with gwendoline and i certainly don’t believe gwendoline is REMOTELY okay with what is said about her husband out of clear jealousy and ridicule.

i didn’t block the person because when i took that screenshot it was back in… i want to say… november? i’m unsure. i had to retrieve the screenshot from my story, which i will include now;

i can go back in my story archives and retrieve the date if it’s absolutely necessary but considering you clearly can’t read enough to take something as simple as a post example out of context, i believe it would be unnecessary.

i so happened to have that screenshot because it was on my twitter feed the day i opened the app and i thought it was wrong so i threw it up on my story because it was plain disrespectful and wrong and stupid of beca to post.

now if that’s everything, this is the last time i will be responding to anything regarding beca and her/their damned post (idk their pronouns , i apologise). it was used as an example. stop being pissy.

[pagerunner-j]

All right, all right. This is a bad idea! I've been trying not to cross these streams for a long time! But: fuck it. Who fics ahead!

--

Long story short: I used to write under another pen name. I stopped using it and deleted my old journal after some personal crap, which still makes me feel sad and stupid, and I'd wanted at the time to scrub the slate clean. Some of what's still kicking around under my old username, though, includes stories at whofic.com, which predates AO3 and still exists, doing its Whovian thing.

So after recent fandom flashbacks, I've been rereading my old stuff. Which has been...interesting!

Obligatory disclaimer: oh, god, do I want to edit everything. These date back as far as 2005, and so certain old habits linger, like the fact that I hadn't yet gotten over my torrid love affairs with the semicolon and the ellipsis. I want to fix the occasional dips into overwrought nonsense. I'm also looking at some of the more adult content and thinking, "Okay, that went from 0-60 a wee bit fast. Calm the hell down, self."

BUT: there's also stuff here I like! And about which I'm thinking "crap, I used to be good at this," because I can never leave myself alone!

Anyway, here's a few stories from the "this does not shame me" pile, plus notes:

Gen

Translations (Ten/Rose) Original description: There are some things the TARDIS doesn't translate, and some secrets of the Doctor's left unexplained. Rose is setting out to find out why. 

Probably the best thing of mine on this archive, and one of the most developed narratives. The sneaky, sneaky merchant, whose storyline never quite gets resolved (on purpose), was one of my better ideas. The other was Rose interpreting the TARDIS console's layout as looking like a Gallifreyan word. And, for that matter, Rose's name looking like an actual flower. Thank you, DW designers, for a completely impractical but extremely cool-looking written language. Also, the fact that the marketplace has thirteen floors, and they were on the tenth? Yeah, yeah, that was on the nose. I note that since then, the showrunners have thrown the Doctor's thirteen-regenerations limit out the window, for perfectly understandable reasons, but it was still kicking around at the time.

Roundabout (Nine/Rose) Original description: Time and possibilities keep turning. an exploration of the Doctor and Rose's relationship throughout the series. Spoilers for all [first season] episodes.

The other one that I'd file under "hey, you wrote a story! And it's not bad! Good job, self!" file. I really loved Nine and Rose, and I went to town with it here. I also got completely self-indulgent in a few places. As one does. The scene at the club is my favorite on that account. This quip of Jack's to the Doctor was, among other things, a sidelong nod to a few of my feelings about American polarization, and believe me, It's worse now: "It's Saturday night. We're in one of the last great cities of post-Dissolution America. And the most handsome man in the club has just bought you an Electric Comet. Do yourself a favor. Get drunk." Also, the reason Rose thinks she knows the music that's playing is that it's 110% a quote from a Billie Piper song. I don't think anybody ever noticed, but it's there.

Outgeniused (or: How to Get Fired From the Apple Store in Three Easy Steps) (Ten, OC) Original description: Kate Stowe's seen a lot of strange problems come up at the Genius Bar, but this one qualifies as the strangest she's seen yet. Presenting a bit of shameless insanity, featuring the Doctor, a race of aliens with quite inconvenient taste, and several unorthodox ways to break your iPod's warranty. (In other words: crackfic ahead!)

I really wasn't kidding about that last line. This one is unabashed ridiculousness, inspired by your author doing a seasonal stint in Apple retail that left a goddamn mark. Sadly, the Doctor never swung by my store. A lot of real-life tidbits did make their way into this story, though. And despite all odds, it's got a plot! Fun facts (for nerds): the product line was accurate as of the time I wrote this. The iPod shuffle disclaimer I was talking about? That was absolutely a thing. And my favorite line is still the Doctor apologizing for not getting AppleCare, because I had to pitch that to so many people. I have never once bought it for myself. No regrets. Don't tell Tim. Also, apparently the UK really has gone all-in on Black Friday since I wrote this. I have to ask: why? Why must you import the worst of our capitalistic excesses? You really didn't have to! Le sigh.

The Naughty Bits

A Matter of Timing (Ten/Rose) Original description: In matters of love, sex and the technicalities thereof, somebody better be thinking ahead. Rose/Ten, post-Journey's End.

Short, sweet, and silly. This one's about Rose and the clone of Ten off in their parallel universe, and exists for the sake of the conversation they're having, which is in part about the mechanics of that whole cloning thing. Although it's mostly about the sex. Which they are absolutely and enthusiastically having the whole damn time. ("Haven't ever seen that on a clock" is still my favorite line.)

Slightly Psychic Confessions (Nine/Rose/Jack) Original description: Getting caught with slightly psychic paper in one's hands can be a dangerous thing indeed.

Like it says on the tin. 90% of the reason this was written was so I could play with the props, and the dialogue (both spoken and psychically transcribed) is the part I most enjoy, although I've been told the rest of it's pretty okay too. ...yes, the rest of it is a threesome. Stop looking at me like that.

Selfish Dreams (Ten/Rose) Original description: Wherein solutions to lingering nightmares lead to a different sort of sleeplessness. Slightly spoilery through "The Satan Pit."

Sometimes I get creepy, even with characters I love and will ship forever. This one was mostly me thinking through some of the...potentially fraught...implications of Ten's psychic abilities, and is one of my "I guess I'm preoccupied with nightmares and dreams, because I'm gonna come back to that in a few different ways" stories in this archive. Anyway, none of what they're up to here is what I'd consider a good idea. At least Rose enjoyed herself, though.

Forgetting the Nightmare (Nine/Jack) Original description: In which neither the Doctor nor Jack can get any sleep, but for very different reasons.

As I was saying. This is about a plot point from the show I'd forgotten about since writing this: Jack's two years of missing memory. (So, yes, apparently mine's missing too. It's been A LONG TIME, okay?) He's having some issues coming to terms with that. So how do I decide to have them address it? Boinking on the TARDIS floor, apparently. ...ahem. Anyway, as is the case with a lot of the shit I wrote, it's a little emotionally messy. It also hints at a few things that are still very much up for interpretation. Less in need of puzzling out is that yes, the two lost years are represented by the two burned-out lights on the console they're trying to fix, because I am occasionally as subtle as a brick.

Beyond Locked Doors (Ten/Reinette) Original description: A glimpse into Reinette's memories and dreams throughout the events of "The Girl in the Fireplace."

Yeah, this is one of those that dips into being overwrought, and yes, my inner editor is bitching at me about sacrificing clarity in the process. But writing from Reinette's POV was a fun exercise. It's a very different flavor from everything else here. Also, just to get this stated, you still can't tell me that the "dance with me" line in the show and those two disappearing off screen together wasn't also Moffat being subtle as a brick with his metaphors, so I still feel justified in writing this one. The (implied) sex was canon and I will die on that hill.

So Brief, In Bloom (Ten/Reinette) Original description: Wherein the Doctor thinks of other ways this could have gone.

And now...things go south. I'm pretty sure I'm the only weirdo who cared about this story. It is, let's be fair, also weird. This is about Ten being haunted by the idea of what might have happened if he did get Reinette to come along with him, and what the ramifications of that change might be. Not overtly stated, but it's there, is that in this alternate timeline, Rose didn't take well to this idea, and eventually left. The result is some Seriously Conflicted Feelings. And some ill-advised attempts at banishing them. I once got a comment on my old journal from somebody who didn't understand the last line. it's oblique on purpose, and you're invited to imagine your own version, but what was going on in my head was that back in the actual timeline, Ten absolutely had his way with Rose against that very same wall to try to scrub the idea of the other timeline out of his head. Considering that the wayward strand of hair he found could have belonged to either her or Reinette, though? It...didn't exactly help.

A Laugh Like Thunder (The Master/Lucy) Original description: The Master and Lucy on the eve of destruction, thinking of what's to come. (Spoilers through "The Sound of Drums.")

I'm including this here solely because I'd forgotten about it until I trawled back through my archive, and was thus smacked upside the head with the facts that A: it existed at all, B: this thing went places, and C: I started it off with, "On the eve of destruction, the Prime Minister tied his wife to the bedposts and began to think of another man." Go off, self.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Know Your Place 1

Warnings: non/dubcon, power dynamic, age gap, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Characters: Walter Marshall, destroyer!Chris [for the purposes of this AU, I will give him the last name Jackson] (Professor AU)

Summary: after a life time of home schooling, you finally get to experience the real world in college. (petite reader)

Part of the Bad Professors AU

Note: Please leave some feedback and reblog <3 As always, I love to chat with you all. 

The noise all around has you reeling. You’re not used to so many people. So many voices and smells and sights. The frantic action of it all reminds you of a mid-00s movie about a high school. The coeds are like animals milling about in groups with the odd single body rushing between with a mission stitched between their brows. 

You sit with your thermos of tea and try to focus on your schedule. You have a campus map from the Student Support Centre next to it, trying to map out your route for each day. Momma said you should try to get ahead, figure out where you’re going. She’s always right. 

You have two classes that day. As you find the buildings on the map, planting a finger on each, you find that they are on completely different ends of the campus. Of course. Well, momma didn’t know that where they would be, did she? She said you have to balance your load; if you’re going to be an English major, make sure you take some math and science for your electives. 

You circle the two buildings and put lets beside them denoting which day you need to be there, numbering them in the order the classes occur. A burst of laughter breaks your concentration and you look around, trying to find the source. You almost miss the calm isolation of your childhood living room. 

No, you’re grown now and you begged Momma to let you go to college. Not online, but in person. You even worked all summer at the deli so you could live in a dorm. She was proud but worried. She’s never been good at letting go. She’s already called three times today and it’s not even noon. 

As the crowd blurs around you, a sudden gust blows over the table as someone sits across from you. You stare back at them with a gasp. They must’ve mistaken you for someone else. You blink as the man tugs on the front of his letterman jacket and smiles. He doesn’t seem mistaken. 

“Hey,” he leans forward on an elbow, “you waitin’ for someone? Got some cute girlfriends on their way?” 

He’s so forward, he has your brows as high as they can go and your cheeks are on fire. It’s not much of an introduction. 

“Excuse me?” You eke out. 

“Ah, I’m sorry, hon, I’m getting ahead of myself,” he smirks as he crosses both his arms on the table. “I’m Colin. You looked lonely.” 

“Oh, uh, I’m just... figuring out my schedule,” you utter dumbly. Yor brain isn’t clicking. Why is he talking to you? 

Your ears tweak and you notice a group in similar jackets, sitting just across the dining area, gabbing loudly, snickering. You wonder why he isn’t over there with them. You wiggle your pen anxiously. 

“Ah, you’re not gonna give me a name for that pretty face?” He says. 

“Huh?” Your brows drop, “what?” 

Your momma’s voice echoes in your head. ‘Be careful of those college boys. They only want one thing.’ You didn’t believe her. They don’t want that from you. You were sure once you saw the other girls in their tight leggings and short tops. 

“Your name, baby? Gotta be something sweet, huh?” 

Your face ripples as you wade through surprise, confusion, then something else. You’re almost giddy. This man, with his mussed blond hair and bright blue eyes, and his chiseled features, is asking you your name. It’s flattering. 

“Mauve,” you can’t help but smile as you answer. 

“Oh, yeah? That’s pretty, well, Mauve,” he takes out his phone, “me and my buddies are having a party tonight and we’re supposed to find a hottie to bring with us. I’m having no luck but if I show up alone, well... I might not get to stay in the frat. You get it?” 

You stare at him. You're confused. You don’t really understand frats and whatnot. They just seem like clubs people join so they can drink. 

“You wanna do me a favour? Come with me?” He asks. 

He’s bold. Bolder than any one you’ve ever met. You sputter but can’t come up with any words. 

“Please,” he pouts, “promise, I won’t try anything, I just gotta get these guys off my back.” 

He looks over his shoulder at the table of rowdy guys. You squirm in your seat, uncertain. You’ve never been to a party. Wow. 

“Here, I’ll get your number,” he taps on his phone screen, “I’ll send you the details--” 

“Leave her alone,” a grizzly voice undercuts the frat across from you. 

A thick man stands behind him. He has a cardboard cup in his hand as he glares down at the coed. His burly figure is swathed in a dark green sweater and grey slacks. He’s older and his dark curls are threaded with subtle twinkles of silver. 

“Huh? Who the hell are you?” 

“Why don’t you show her those pictures you were snapping of her? The ones you and your pals were laughing about?” The other man growls.  

You frown. What? You don’t understand what’s going on. You look from one to the other. The younger man sat across from your sighs and rolls his eyes. 

“Fuck it. Whatever. Lots of pigs to go around,” he shakes his head and stands, facing the other man. “You know, bro, just cause you’re too old to get with any ass around here, doesn’t mean you gotta ruin it for others.” 

“Get out of here,” the thicker man snarls. The other winces just slightly before puffing up his chest and stomping away. 

You remain as you are, aghast and lost. The man with the dark curls looks at you. You shrug at him. 

“I’m sorry, sir, did I do something wrong?” You ask. 

The harsh angles of his scowl ease and he lets out a long breath, “uh, no, not you. That boy, you know, any one that wears one of those jackets, they’re no good. Just some advice.” 

“Oh, right,” you look over at that guy, Colin, “sorry, I didn’t know. He just started talking to me. I was being polite.” 

“Seem like a nice girl. Just tryna look out for you.” 

“Yeah, thanks,” you chew your lip and sniff. “Are you... are you teacher?” 

“I’m a professor,” he confirms as he holds his cup close to his chest. He's one of the biggest men you’ve ever seen. And his eyes are as blue as the ocean. “Professor Marshall but unless you’re a psych student, you can call me Walter.” 

“Walter? My neighbour is Walter. At home. He’s eighty-one and he collects baseball cards,” you let yourself smile. You always felt more comfortable around older people. You never had many friends your own age. 

“Don’t mind some baseball myself,” he dips his chin. “Well, you look out for yourself and avoid the Greeks.” 

“Greeks?” You make a face. 

“Fraternities,” he says. “And sororities, if you can help it.” 

“Oh, okay. Thank you, sir,” you feel a little better. You think he’s right and he is a professor. He would know. “I’ll do that.” 

“Sir? It’s Walter,” he corrects you. 

“Oh, sorry, Walter,” you smile. “I’m Mauve.” 

He nods and shifts his cup, “Mauve,” he repeats, “well, nice to meet you.” 

“You too, sir, er, Walter. Thank you,” you say. 

He hesitates then steps back on his heel, “yeah, no problem.” 

He slowly retreats and you watch him, your heart playing like a drum. You did it. You spoke to strangers and you didn’t melt. Things are getting easier. If you could get through that, you’re sure you’ll make lots of friends in your classes. 

[tuesday-is-a-good-day]

bro, I'm so sorry you had to see that

If I were you, I'd be panicking too because what. 😭😭😭 they didn't have to call you out like that or even show ur acc if they were going to rant about it rudely.

I mean, sure it is the internet so everybody's just being 'fair game' and posting what they want but like...dang.

I feel for you. even I got second hand stress just from reading yalls' discussion.

Have a hug, tuesday 😭🫂

HAHAHSHFJF ty 😭

Honestly I was real shaky for a while because I have a hard time not taking things personally and it was rather aggressive, but hey that’s the internet amirite??

My general rule when ranting is to assume that my rant will always make it back to the original poster. I don’t think they wanted to engage in a discussion (or maybe they did idk), but even if they didn’t think I was gonna see it, DAMN that’s a lot.

I also can’t help but notice that they cropped out the username of someone else who they included in their post, and I’m not claiming it was on purpose but damn alr.

I kind of hate how because the internet is anonymous it’s considered fine to just, attack people? Like maybe I’m sensitive (I am) but lord it’s like we’ve forgotten how to just be decent. I’m no saint but I do try to keep bitching to a minimum, or at least in private chats.

Ty again anon, this was really nice to receive 🫂

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

Umm theres a comment under emma insta post saying

remember when you called Evan's gf in 2015 the n word with a hard r

you and your stylist did it

not many people know the story but some Evan stans do. basically Evan dated a black girl he met on set of ahs in 2015 and Emma and her stylists called her the n word in front of Evan

Do we believe it cuz I never heard ot if and people can now make things up

guys, please be careful with this one. it is not true.

this anecdote comes from a very complicated and quite frankly disturbing story, that's far too long for me to get all the way into. i've purposely tried to not discuss this in the past because some people's real lives have been affected by it and it gives me an uneasy feeling.

many years back, a handful of fans from tumblr had a discord server. this story originates from there. there are a couple of people who are deeply emotionally invested, and believe they spoke with evan peters himself on that discord server, as well as other individuals close to the story shared above. they believe evan divulged personal information to them, including stuff about emma and their relationship.

i had a bad feeling this was going to be drudged back up because the very first tiktok i saw this morning had a username that was associated with this story. there's someone taking advantage of vulnerable people on discord, pretending that they are evan peters talking to fans.

[writtenwolves]

Gotta hate the AO3 spam comments era.

I rarely get comments from unfamiliar usernames (including spam; I’ve only gotten one as far as I remember) so when I got a comment this morning that was stylized like a scalping AI trying to create a legitimate history, I spent several minutes trying to figure out if the bots were evolving. It did have actual, true details about the fic. Yet they were vague, and (probably) could have been filled in based on the fandom/tags/number of comments. This was from an actual account, though (i don’t know of examples of AO3 bots that aren’t guests, but it’s the whole ‘what if they’re evolving’ thing), which didn’t have any bookmarks, works, or gifts, but did have a profile picture of a character from the fandom, and a creation date from June. Being so new to AO3 explains why they sounded so different from other commenters, so with all that taken together I’m now like 95% sure they are a real person.

Idk, in a world where I routinely have to prove my humanity to robots so I can log into a website, I don’t want neat writing. That person didn’t do anything wrong, but far as commenting goes, it makes me want to leave in typos on purpose and use excessive emoticons.