#i did my bes

[boneheadboner]

Depths in Despair ; Megalosomnia

Deep Down Deep Part 1/2

CW: Hypnosis, unreality, some oogling, and one thirsty human. No nsfw here yet srry.

Baggs takes a walk to clear his mind, and stumbles upon a surprise on his walk. A gift that keeps on giving.

Deep down, down far below any formally finished floor of the labs. Baggs needed all the room he could get for his experiments, after all.

Truth be told, many floors had much work to be done on them yet.

Yet he often found himself down at the lowest floor. The pristine linoleum flooring, and sturdy professional phenolic wall tiles stopped not too short from the elevator to the level. Exposing wiring that was still being set, steel beams that supported the frame of what was to be a hallway. A hallway that would extend down the open tunnel they’d made. Excavation of this floor had been finished. Initially halted due to a break in the cavern that exposed a way into Waterfall. However, Baggs assured the excavation team that he could easily work that into the plans. 

Easily so, as it was far off the beaten path in Waterfall. A small, hidden passage that found itself hidden by reeds, nestled close to the walls of the larger caverns. Another entryway, for him to easier access that part of the underground… Waterfall’s notable glowing water was perfect for samples of highly concentrated magic, after all… And the path could serve as an emergency escape if need be. But. Things were still in the works five floors above. Security was not an issue, the elevator already required a passcode and badge. So the priority on finishing the floor was shifted, and it would be a good while before they moved such noisy operations down here.

Down here, the voices of people did not reach. Down here, the thoughts of those people were far from his mind. Down here, there was something resembling quiet. And it made this place a wonderful respite. 

No one would guess to seek him out here. After all, why would the royal scientist bother with examining a floor not yet finished of the laboratory? Especially a floor so unsterile and so untamed? 

None would consider it. Which is why it worked so perfectly.

Down in such depths, there was only the resonance of the damp air that echoed down the tunnel. 

The distant drops from stalactites faintly audible as they splash onto the water below. 

Sending gentle peaceful ripples through the water, that he could just imagine in his mind.  

A peaceful place, where he could try to find some quiet from the schedules, from the constant requests, from the pressure he bore on his shoulders.

And so much that needed to be done that only the wit and wisdom his mind had, could see done.

Every bit of planning on expansions and constructions needed his sign off, especially in the labs. A few centimeters wrong and calculations regarding volume and space within the room would be thrown off. 

Every bit of distribution of resources fell to him to calculate, as none others would know how to calculate the exact and precise needs of each part of the underground on a daily basis, and see to it that those supplies got to where they needed to. Every bit of the research on the Humans and their SOULs needed his examination and surgical precision to carry out, there could be no mistakes with beings and SOULs so volatile. 

Nevermind that machine on the 22nd floor, the mysterious creator who brought it to conception had never finished it, and who’s identity and notes were so scattered, it was up to his brilliance to piece together what its function and purpose was…

… Stars, even in peace, he still couldn’t escape from his own thoughts. 

He closed his eyes for a short moment. 

… What was he thinking… There was so much more to do, even the stillness of the caverns couldn’t abate the hurricane of thoughts held within his own mind. 

All the calculations, all the concepts, all the questions only he could solve.

All that came to a screeching halt, as he heard the distinct echo of a shoe slipping on wet stone, and a sharp, notably female, squeak of shock. 

Followed by a little mumble and whimper.

Stars… Maybe this entrance wasn’t as hidden as he thought it was. It would be best to face this accidental intruder and… Encourage them to forget that they ever found this tunnel… And perhaps, there was a slight curiosity to the owner of a voice he didn't believe he’d heard before. 

Baggs’ soft footsteps must have been heard, as he heard scampering on the wet stones deeper down. 

“H-Hello…???” An anxious voice, belonging to… Someone, possibly female, called out. He stilled his movement, pondering for a moment. No no, certainly no voice he’d heard before. And a voice he’d never heard before, was a person he’d never had the pleasure of meeting… That they’d never had the pleasure of meeting him.“I– No, no… T-This is a dead end. Nothing’s down there… I’ve h-hidden here before.” the voice softly mumbled, the tunnel walls softly echoing their aloud thoughts to Baggs. Good. They thought it was a dead end. … But that didn’t quell the doctor’s arousing curiosity.

While he didn’t fear anyone in his domain, to have a tactical advantage against a potential foe? He couldn’t pass that up. 

Slowly and carefully, he made his way to the (accidental) exit of the tunnel. 

And as he rounded the corner, he caught sight of his unexpected guest. A human. Baggs’ SOUL nearly lept. What luck! He knew that there would be more opportunities to explore with this one, new parameters to test, more possibilities of outcomes that could better the projects he was working on. Their gaze pointed out towards the light of Waterfall, and their body faced away from the cavern deeper in. Despite making little attempt to hide himself, they didn’t seem to notice him. And thus he could get as much of a look at them as he pleased before making his presence known.

Ambient glow of the water reflected off the cavern walls cast light on much of the woman’s features. He could see they had rather pale complexion, with brown hair tied back in a high ponytail, with a few short locks left free to frame their face. 

On the bridge of their nose sat rather large round glasses, and their green eyes were locked onto the area they thought was the only entryway to their hiding place.  Lowering his gaze, he found that their garments consisted of a dark green turtleneck sweater dress, sleek black leggings, and simple brown boots. And despite the thickness of the dress’ fibers, it didn’t hide how full her figure was. She most certainly was a female born specimen. He hadn’t seen such disproportionately large mammaries on a human specimen before. And her midsection would likely do well to hide this disproportion, as the soft curves there indicated she was fortunately not deprived from nutrition.   A bit of abject curiosity had him questioning how soft her chest, and those plush looking thighs of hers–

A yelp startled Baggs from his ogling. As the human woman had spotted him, and staggered back in surprise. Landing them harshly onto her posterior. 

Damn it. He’d have to ensure he fit a particular breed of “stress relief” into his already packed schedule, as he wasted too much time ‘examining’ her to make himself properly known. A light had quickly caught Baggs’ eyelights.

Without having initiated any form of combat, her SOUL seemed to pop out and orbit around her, as erratic and quick as a gnat. A lime green in coloration, with what he could faintly see as a pure black spider-webbing crack from the center of it.

How fascinating. Adult human souls could have varying levels of damages to them, as well as varying hues, vibrancy, and even splits in coloration. This one was going to be interesting to examine. And how easy she’d made it. 

Although… The last time he had handled a SOUL with a crack in it that bad… It couldn’t handle his magic. He would have to be careful about this. 

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t know you came here too, I–” Her rambling paused, a confused expression overtaking her. How strange, he hadn’t even done anything yet. Baggs cleared his throat. “Well–” “W-Wait what? Mind reading…??”

Pardon? What–

“--!! HYPNOSIS?¹” Her eyes widened in shock, as she suddenly yelped out, which took Baggs back by surprise. Panic overtook her, as she moved her hands to her ears, and winced her eyes shut. How– “U-Uhm, l-look, Sans, er… Baggs,  uh– W-Whatever your name is, Uhm….!! Trust me, you DON’T want in my head.” She stammered out, trying to curl in on herself. 

… Well now he really wanted in her head. He’d never met this woman, but not only had she known his old name, and new name… But she also knew what he was capable of. “It’s LOUD, it’s scary, it’s overwhelming, I g-get a lot of awful thoughts–”

That information was something he couldn’t let slip.

And with a slight push of his magic on her, tapping into her-

                                                  “IT’S BAGGS!!!”                              !RECNELIS           “Aw shit here we go again”              “!recneliS”      

“It’s the swirly eye guy!”                !!tuo ti teG                         “Oh my god it’s the hypnosans.”                 !!tuo ti teG  !!tuo ti teG             “Shit gurl what are you doing–run bitch run”         !RECNELIS         “!!!recneliS”                                    “HYPNODADDYY!!!!!”    “This is when Sonia knew; she fucked up”                                !RECNELIS ENOGEB           “BAGGSYYYYY”                  .EREH UOY TNAW TON OD EW ,RECNELIS ENOGEB   “Welp looks like Sonia’s gonna have a good time ;D”                 !!!TUO ti teG             “We had a good run, boys!”              “WTF Sonia you cut your hand on the rocks, DO THE THING”                            ?lessev ruo htiw tnaw uoy od tahw ,recneliS    “I LOVE HIM TAKE US HOME BAGGS”                        !!tuo ti teG         “Is covering her ears even gonna work?       !RECNELIS     !!tuo ti teG                !!tuo ti teG   !!tuo ti teG           !!tuo ti teG  !RECNELIS ENOGEB    !!tuo ti teG      !!tuo ti teG  

         .EREH UOY TNAW TON OD EW ,RECNELIS ENOGEB   

Baggs shook his head, pulling back from the overwhelming deluge of differing voices that flooded his mind when he tried to read hers. 

Well, that explained how she knew things she wasn’t supposed to. And he got her name, without needing to ask it.

“My… You weren’t joking when you said it was loud…” Baggs snorted, almost in disbelief of just how loud this woman’s own mind was. Surely, something like this could be… Valuable. But first, he needed to make sure that Sonia trusted him. If the one hearing such information was loyal to him, then perhaps he could put those… Noisy voices in her mind to use, to attain information that he might not be privy to. And there wasn't much in the underground that he was not privy to.

Baggs slowly approached Sonia, who was crouched down and curled in on herself as much as she could. Her SOUL was circling around her faster and faster, as he could easily pick up on the anxiety this woman was going through. He watched, getting an idea of what paths her SOUL would take in its orbit, and held out a hand gently towards her, his palm upwards. Letting his mere intent gently reach out towards her soul. Baggs wanted her to trust him, being too rough about this could endanger that. “Now now, my dear… Don’t be so afraid…” Baggs soothing tones gently echoed off the walls, a smirk grew on his face. Stars, with the acoustics assisting him, he didn’t have too much a need for his magic yet. 

This couldn’t be more perfect. 

He made gentle, coaxing motions with his fingers, not utilizing his eye quite yet. No, this woman was on the defensive, with no inclination of offensive desire. Slowly, and gently. “It’s going to be alright…” More and more, her SOUL’s path started to slow when it would cross close to his hand. Sonia curled in on herself more, and Baggs could almost feel the headache that she must have been dealing with. “Take a nice, slow, deep breath for me.” 

It took her a moment to show any sign of response. But with the slow, deep inhale she took, that was his answer as to whether or not she was blocking her ears enough to hear his voice. 

“And then let it out, slowly and gently.” The fall of her back as she slowly exhaled was a relief. How humans involved so much of their body in the act of breathing, it was a fascinating process to see in the works. And through doing so, easing a slow calm into the mind. “Good… Now breathe in once more, slowly and deeply.” Even without his magic, Sonia obeyed him. Drawing in another slow and deep breath into her lungs. 

Furthermore, curiously, Baggs watched her hands move from her ears. Slowly curling over her head instead. A likely surrender of her attempts to block out his voice. Perfect, letting her guard down more and more… “Now as you breathe out, feel the stress and tension in your body slowly drift out with your breath.” A slow exhale, he could see Sonia’s shoulders start to relax a bit. Before a tense as she gripped her head. Ah.. Those voices must be giving the poor girl a migraine at any rate. “There there… It’s going to be alright…”

Baggs crouched down next to her, gently soothing a hand on her back. Mixing a bit of his magic with his intent, and it wasn’t long before her SOUL practically came right to him. Baggs wouldn’t risk applying his magic right away, not with so many unknown factors with this one. Not to mention the damage on her SOUL already.… And with her being so meek and passive? He could take his time on this, there was no rush. Besides, it was an experiment. Testing out ‘traditional’  hypnosis methods that humans would use on eachother could prove to be entertaining. 

And proper entertainment was something he had been… Sorely lacking in his schedule. “Breathing in, feeling a comforting warmth fill your lungs, and relaxation easing in.”

A slow, shaky breath in. He watched as her back raised in her hunched over position. 

“... Breathing out, feeling the stress and tension leave with your breath.”

A slower, heavier drawn out breath. Good, she wouldn’t be at risk of hyperventilating at this rate.

“... Breathing in, warmth and relaxation.”

And slowly, as she breathed in. Baggs began easing some of his magic onto her SOUL. Gentle, careful.

“... Breathing out, stress and tension.”

Sonia breathed out, as he examined her SOUL. The last thing he wanted to risk was that crack growing bigger…

“And as you breathe, you’ll find those voices that speak in your mind… Start to grow quieter, and quieter.”

Another slow and deep breath from his new human subject– patient. How Interesting, he hadn’t anticipated this level of reception with so little magic use on his part. At the very least, using this slower method proved to be… Relaxing, for both his intended subject, and himself. 

“Breathing in, warmth and relaxation…”

Baggs watched as more and more, Sonia’s body eased, no longer clinging to her head for dear life. Instead resting her palms gently on the floor. 

“Breathing out, stress and tension…”

Watched as the tension and fear ebbed from her posture, her knees coming to rest on the cavern floor. Just taking slow, and deep breaths on her own, now. No need for Baggs to tell her to do so, all he needed to do was get her on a slow, steady rhythm.

“Feeling yourself drift, in this calm warmth. As each of those voices slowly drift further and further away.”

Nevermind that he was slowly and surely tuning those loud streams of thoughts down to a trickle. 

“Quieter and quieter, find that one by one… Each of those voices becomes so silent, you can barely hear them…”

Baggs wanted to ensure that there was still some manner of connection. Severing it entirely could ruin his plans for her. Sonia raised her head a bit, but still had her eyes closed. Time to fix that. Using the hand that wasn’t guiding her soul, Baggs gently stroked a hand along her chin. Ever so gently stroking to lead her head towards him. 

“One by one, becoming so quiet…” Baggs leaned close. 

Sonia’s eyes opened up in surprise, upon hearing how close his voice had become. Perfect. His eye’s magic activated, which caught her eyes almost instantly. How easily his magic pulled her down, the SOUL in his hand shivered in fear… Before that fear slowly ebbed away.

“... Until my voice is the only one you hear.” 

As her eyes focused on his, he watched that look of shock become replaced by an expression of lulled relaxation. A little soft smile weakly tugged at her mouth, the look in her eyes was… … Completely unexpected. A gentle look of pining and reverence as she gazed up at him through half-lidded eyes. He could feel how despite her initial resistance, she fell so easily under his magic. “Well, isn’t that so much better…? Nothing to worry about… Nothing to fear… Let yourself drift in this wonderful feeling…” Baggs smiled softly as he cupped her cheek with his hand. Like a wild kitten being pet for the first time, he felt her slowly lean her face into his hand. Sonia seemed to be full of so many surprises, as her hand slowly raised to caress over his, and heard her weakly purr out; “Mmm… Master~...” His jaw dropped. And he was unable to stop the chortle that escaped his mouth. 

Sonia being so easy to fall under and accept it, despite his slow and steady hypnosis? Was a welcome surprise. Her leaning into his dominance so readily as if to eagerly cling to it? An absolutely welcome treat.

“Well well… I didn’t even need to teach you that one... You’re an eager one, aren’t you~?” Baggs cooed, as he watched the woman’s head lean ever more against his hand. Her eyes glazed over, swirling with his magic, and focused on his own. The expression of reverence still clear on her face. Baggs was certainly going to have a lot of fun with this one, he could already tell… 

[chessb0r3d]

Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

License to Kitty.

[myclericalromance]

i went to a tiny counterserve diner once and accidentally poured sugar instead of salt all over my hashbrowns and was eating them sadly anyways. the waitress took them away and started making me another one and I tried to protest, but she just snorted and said "we're not catholic here". now every time i'm doing something painful out of obligation i think about how that is not repenting, this body is not a catholic establishment, there is no nobility in suffering.

[ochiody]

theyre literally already married

[artkaninchenbau]

A h-heartfelt reunion..?

Bonus

[ruporas]

dragon meat, you, and me

[katsinspats]

Thematically appropriate comic for Make a Terrible Comic Day!!

I saw the original post this morning and it made me get out of bed to make something, so thank u Pseudonym Jones mission accomplished

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

I just wanna say bc I KNOW you're somewhere on tumblr, to the teenage girl who attended Take Your Kid To Work Day at an office building in Ontario, Canada circa 2013 and had a conversation with a middle aged woman in which you showed her your Black Veil Brides fanart and fanfics and ship content and told her about different fanfic tropes including a/b/o verse bc she happened to know who Panic! at The Disco and Fallout Boy were and thus you felt the need to show her your bandblr ship art, that was my fucking mother and I had to clarify all that to her including looking my mother in the eye and trying to explain a/b/o verse without sounding like a lunatic.

It's been 10 years and I still regularly sent evil energies in your direction. Since you'd be probably two years younger than me and thus legally an adult now, please know if this post reaches you it's on sight.

[talaricula]

Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing à la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :

Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources

Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)

Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women

Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women

Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)

Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)

Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community

Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS

Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough

Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media

Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards

Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories

Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")

And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue

Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)

[musubiki]

my favorite fields of mistria boys 🥰

[panthermouthh]

“Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust?”

[cainternn]

more deadpool and wolverine thoughts

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[ninjasmudge]

thats a red flag narinder, get that crown back while you still can

+ top panel without text below the cut

[garbagequeer]

hilarious man (The National Play “Sorrow” for Six Hours at MoMA PS1)