#i did get sent to my school psychologist for it tho

[estelle-eternal-enlight]

i have two hopes for this life. either to be loved or to be dead

[anaalnathrakhs]

i dont understand what i'm doing wrong holy fuck it KEEPS happening psychiatrist appointments are starting to go weirdly again.

i've had three so far and we've spent a LOT of time going over menial shit, like, symptomatology i understand why you'd need to do that face to face, but name age address occupation, like, was it necessary to use up a whole session for that. was it necessary to start THIS session by slooooooowly recapping the whole thing to the therapist in training sitting in the session?

i'm always amazed by what she takes away from what i've said. i had said i was sent to a psychologist as a child because i was bullied at school, it caused me to have behavioral problems and sometimes turn violent towards other kids, SHE asked more about the violence thing, and then apparently what she wrote down is "went to therapy because it was violent towards other kids"??????? like i understand that a different point of view on the events of your life can be a very useful and constructive to know what you might be attaching too much or too little importance to, to know when you were in the wrong, when you did the wrong thing. but there's a bunch of little details like that that end up being the only topic of the sentence and ????? why do you fixate on THAT ????? not even a MENTION of the other things????

holy shit she just started asking about the topic of next year when we updated the info on my file, and it literally felt like i was arguing with my parents like when it was really bad around 13 or 14yo. it's not doing anything productive it's just. i don't fucking know it's just arguing. she kept making assumptions and when i'd say i didn't see it like that, didn't feel it like that, that i felt it was inaccurate, that there was something else that she didn't think about that contradicted the assumption, and it was like even more questions all based on "but did u think u might be too pessimistic tho" like. no i think it's a reasonable thing to worry about actually? i think it's a legitimate concern to have? your job is to help me learn to handle difficult situations and the way i react to them in an healthy way, not to tell me i'm literally inventing problems. once fucking again nobody believes that i have problems with school. once again it's treated like a self-esteem problem when i try to say i may be having good grades but it's a DIFFICULT THING TO DO FOR ME. that it's not the product of a good or sustainable work technique or ethic and that it's actually fairly reasonable to think it might not follow when i encounter more difficult academic challenges.

and fuck, that was supposed to be what "working on my problems" is? cuz she didn't fucking warn me. she didn't explain shit to me. she just started asking a question and then it took twenty minutes. when literally i showed up first session saying i stopped seeing my previous psychiatrist because she would just segway into a different part of the session without even notifying me that she'd stopped typing the administrative info and we could start, she was just waiting for me to talk, and didn't explain anything about what work she did with patients, what it looked like, etc. it is KNOWN TO BE A PROBLEM WHEN PEOPLE DONT EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT'S GOING ON. why would she do that again, if that was supposed to be actual work on the situation?

it feels like nobody fucking listens to what i'm actually saying. and i don't know, i guess that's where the problem is, if i keep having trouble to communicate with different people, then the problem is obviously me, but what the fuck am i doing wrong? how do i fix it? i feel like i ask one question, and i get back a pre-canned answer on the general topic, that doesn't take into account what i said my feelings were on the matter. i feel like i'm always pushed to give more nuance, more details, and when (by myself or when prompted, when she asks leading questions to know more about a specific element) i go into more depth, the thing that ends up being marked down in the summary, being focused on, is just the completely wrong thing. and it's not my JOB to say it's the wrong thing, the point of it is to pick up what i'm not rational about, but it's the ONLY thing on the topic. i said a bunch of other stuff and i put my own order of importance to it, don't you think you should at least also MENTION i said that even if you don't agree with it???? especially if it's going to be passed down to other people as your official record of my case????

fucking. just tell me what kind of info is relevant to the work we're doing right now. tell me WHAT work we're doing right now actually.

[minamrose]

Pairing : youngk/brian-reader

Warnings : swearing, physical violence, mention of harassment

Genre : angst, fluff

Summary : brian, one of your closest friends learns that you slept with one of the guys he hates the most at your school (you didn't actually) , and he gets angry at you because you don't want to talk to him about it, he's also a bit jealous. But the he learns the truth and happy ending 🌹

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were about to crack. If you heard him say something more, you were afraid you'll punch him.

"didn't know you were that type of person y/n"

He was sitting right in front of you across the table. You raised your gaze slowly and looked at him. He was furious, you could feel it even if he tried to remain calm. All he wanted was to provoke you right now... The others around you started talking in murmurs. You bit your lip.

"Brian , calm down it's not the time nor the Pl..." you started calmly trying to avoid a really embarrassing situation

But he didn't seem to care

"is it the time and place to tell everyone that you're just a little whore?"

That's it, you couldn't take it anymore. You couldn't believe he went that far. You stood up before slapping him in the face so hard that the whole cafeteria heard it and was now turned towards you. You felt a heavy silence cover the whole place, as everyone was impatiently waiting for the next thing you were going to do. You didn't think twice and took your plate of spaghetti to pour it all over brian as he remained silent. You gave him a last look and he could see the hurt in your eyes. "fuck you Brian, I thought you were different". You managed to keep your voice from cracking and got out of the cafeteria as fast as you could. You wanted to cry, and you did, in the toilets.

Brian regretted what he said as soon as the words left his mouth. He wasn't one to handle his emotions very well, especially when it was about you. He hurt you, he knew it. But he was still mad at you, for so many reasons, reasons he thought he will never find the courage to tell you. He silently got out of the cafeteria , as everyone laughed at him.

18h36

You were home.

You were going through your last texts with Brian, last night and started reminiscing about everything that happened since then.

*Text*

You : sorry for yesterday night, I had to take care of something important

Bribri : oh I know

You : really?? What do you know

Bribri : with Josh... Out of all the boys out there... You must have lost your mind or smth, wtv, not my business

You : yeah not your business, why you being so rude tho?

Bribri: I'll talk to you tomorrow

You : hello am I talkin to my dad?

*/Text*

He didn't answer anymore. You were so confused. The next morning (today), you two talked, indeed. You didn't quite remember at which point you two got really mad at each other...

*flashback*

"Brian, I don't really get why we are having this conversation.." you said, exhausted

"I just don't think I can be friends with you anymore if you're not being honest with me... I swear you hate that guy since elementary school and now he's talking about you like you're his bitch..." he sighed "he sent that photo of you to everyone y/n! " he looked into your eyes as he almost screamed. You crossed your arms over your chest and raised an eyebrow trying to cover the fact that you were anxious.

"okay then, don't be friends with me.. Gosh why are you being so childish..." you then started walking away, trying to escape the situation.

Brian remained static, he had felt your words as if they were bullets. "don't be friends with me", "so childish". He couldn't believe that was what you thought about him. He was worried about you and you just saw him as an exasperating presence. He exhaled deeply, trying to relax his tense jaw.

That same morning you texted that Josh, told him you needed to talk to him. You met at the library, on a corner where nobody could see you.

"okay, you got what you wanted, you made me a whore in the eyes of the entire school, can you stop now? Like get to your next prey I don't know, leave me alone"

"y/n, you don't get to tell me what to do. What about you come to my house later and we get some more pictures of you and... "

You didn't listen to his next words. Your mom is a psychologist, and Josh is one of her patients, she's talked to you a bit about him mostly to warn you about him because the boy is Psycho. He was smirking at you. You were absolutely disgusted.

" you're really sick in the head aren't you? What do you think everyone will think about you if I tell them what you were REALLY doing that night? " you threatened him

"don't be so stupid. I already told you that you better not say anything or I'll make my parents ruin your mom's reputation, she will never be able to work again and..."

"I don't care about my mom" you cut him "so if I want to tell the truth I will and I don't care if you ruin her she's a bitch"

He looked at you as if you were crazy. He seemed afraid though.. He stared at you silently before sighing.

"and I AM the psycho right? Okay, okay, I'll stop..."

You gave him a last menacing look before leaving him.

You had lied. You didn't hate your mom and you weren't going to put her career at risk, but at least it seemed to have worked.

Later that day you went to the cafeteria to eat with your usual friends, including Brian. You really didn't want to be cold with him. So you sat in front of him, in hopes of relaxing things with him. Well, it only made things worse. You had never seen Brian so mad at you, he ignored you everytime you talked to him, he didn't even look at you. You had enough. "Brian, stop it now" you said to him multiple times. Sharp words came out of his mouth, such as "y/n can you understand that I can't always be on your side? I have the right to not wanting to talk to you", "are you in lack of attention? Gosh", "why did you even sit in front of me" . You just looked at him in awe, your eyes became wet as you looked away, trying not to lose your temper. Your friend asked you "what's wrong with him? What did you do?" and everyone else saw his attitude towards you. And then you know what happened.

*/flashback*

You sighed deeply, laid in your bed and closed your eyes.

Brian could be such a prick sometimes. He really was someone who could hurt with his words. But you knew him, and he only did that when he was hurt aswell.

But why was he so quick to judge you? Couldn't he wait for you to tell him what is going on? He was being such a child honestly. You spent the night thinking about him.

You put your phone in your sweater's pocket.

You were almost falling asleep when you felt your phone under your belly. You opened your eyes and looked at the screen.

Bribri : I'm outside.

Wtf. You frowned as you got up of your bed, your phone in hand. It was like 2 am.

You : you serious

Bribri: yes

Half awake, you took baby steps to your room's door. You tried not to make a sound while getting down the stairs. You put on your coat and opened the door of your house. You found a freezing Brian standing outside. He looked at you but not for long. His eyes were admiring the floor apparently. You put your hands in the pockets of your coat and approached him slowly.

"you wanna sit?" you offered and you two sat on the chairs that were on your porch. They weren't the most comfortable but it was better than nothing.

"you could have waited tomorrow.." you said in a low voice

"I know I... I probably should just go home and let you sleep.. I'm sorry I d.. I don't know why I.." he started getting up but you grabbed his arm

"brian.. I can't go to sleep now it would be torture."

"right..." he sighed, sitting down

You had your arms crossed, waiting for him to talk but he seemed to be struggling. At the moment you were so angry at him you thought you'd better shut up.

"y/n... I'm so sorry" he started

His voice was low but you heard the sincerity in his words.

"I didn't mean to tell you those things it's just that... I don't know..."

"you called me a whore, in front of everybody"

"I apologize y/n! But You told me I was being childish when I was worried about you and tried to reach to you.. You rejected me and treated me like I was crazy.."

"I know.." you admitted

" y/n you just leave at 2 am at a party without saying anything " he took a deep breath " do you know how much I panicked when you didn't answer your phone that night? I thought something had happened to you... "

" I know, I'm sorry I should have texted you but.. "

" And next thing I know, everyone is saying you spent the night with that bastard " you saw his face change as he said those words, you could sense the anger coming out of him

" Brian..."

"after that you didn't come to school for like two days and you wouldn't even answer my calls or my texts ... so yeah, I was really annoyed at you... You acted as if I didn't exist when all I wanted was to help you, and then you want to act as if nothing happened" he stopped, his eyes were wandering in front of him, in the dark "but it made me realize something, It made me realize.. that I mean nothing to you"

You stared at him in silence as he nervously played with his hands. Tears started to come to your eyes.

"And it hurts honestly, because maybe.. You mean too much to me"

"stop it" you said in a quiver as you stood up to wipe your tears

"yeah I'll stop, don't worry about it" he finally said with a raspy voice as he tried not to let you know he too was about to cry

He quickly stood up and started walking away.

But you followed him.

"Brian stop!"

He did, you walked to him and stood in front of him. Your eyes were glittery and your nose was runny.

"you don't get it, please listen to me!" you felt the tears run down your hot cheeks

"I.. Am not perfect Brian" your voice was trembling"I tried to help a friend who had been drugged at the party and they were about to use her for god knows what, but they.. Josh wouldn't let us go unless I took that photo he's been showing everywhere.."

"wait... What? Why didn't you tell me?!"

"I don't know... I was ashamed.. I didn't want to bother you with my problems... I didn't know how to tell you that... Brian I.." you looked away as you took one deep breath

"did he touch you?! Who else was there y/n?! " he sounded infuriated

"no... He just said if I told anybody he would tell his parents to ruin my mom's reputation. The other guys, I don't know their names but I think they are in the football team. "

"sick bastard.. I forgot his parents were richer than anyone in this town" his hand furiously went through his messy hair

"please don't do anything" you asked him

He looked at you. The anger vanished from him as he saw your face buried in tears. He softly took your face into his hands and gently, with his sleeve, dried your cheeks.

"do you understand now?" you asked

His head tilted "I do"

He silently pulled you into his arms. You felt so vulnerable yet so good at that exact moment. You detached a bit from him in order to look at him.

"so... How much do I mean to you exactly? "

He glued his eyes to yours.

"you mean everything to me" he whispered

You smiled.

"Brian, I'm sorry I made you think I didn't care about you, it's not true."

He smiled too.

"please don't do it ever again"

"also, thank you for being there"

He rubbed his thumb against your rosy cheeks. "I'll always be there for you"

[sleepyfan-blog]

asdfg fan your writing is so good tho,,, may i request a ibvs chrevinstoph- "Any shorter and you'd probably fade out of existence." ? you don't have to follow the prompt if you don't wanna tho!! ^^"

Fandom: IBVS by @onebizarrekai

Characters and pairing: Nevin Jovel, Christoph Jackson, Isaac Beamer, Barry Price, Edward Quinton, Various Parents, chrevinstoph

Warnings: none

Word count: 2,103

Summary: Chris got cursed. He’s not the only one.

“… When you texted me to come over because you were having a problem, I wasn’t expecting this to be it, Chris.” Nevin remarked as he grinned at his boyfriend, wandering over to where the other was sitting, gently poking the heterochromatic teen. He sobered up after a moment, as this could be really bad.

“Oh, ha-ha Nevin! I texted you for help first because I thought that you’d be the one least likely to laugh at me.” Cross sulked, folding his arms over his chest and sulking, prodding his phone and sighing a little as it slid towards him a little more.

“So… Do you have any idea how this happened? Or did you wake up like this, this morning? I was wondering why you weren’t in class today.” Nevin responded, tempted to take at least a couple of pictures of the other. He looked ridiculously adorable.

“No, I woke up normally… But as soon as I came downstairs for breakfast, I started losing height. Thank fucking god that I was still able to grab poptarts for breakfast and bring them to my room. It’s all I’ve been eating all day.” Cross huffed, kicking his tiny feet “For some reason, my clothes shrank down along with the rest of me, so at least I’m not naked. Father took one look at me this morning and said that he’d call the school saying I was sick. Then he went to work.”

“Have you kept shrinking all day? I really hope that you’ve stopped as if not… Any shorter and you’d probably fade out of existence.” Nevin murmured, kneeling down and unable to stop himself from reaching out to his currently six-inch tall boyfriend. He just… He looked so adorable. “And… Your… Dad just reacted like that? That’s… Really weird.”

“Yeah… I thought that he might freak out a little, express concern that I’m shrinking. But apparently I’m not even worth that.” Chris responded bitterly, scooting a little bit closer to his boyfriend. He’d made a nest out of socks because he got cold really easy the smaller that he got. “And as far as I can tell I’ve stopped shrinking. I hit this size about two hours ago and I don’t think I’ve gotten smaller since then… But like, the longer in the day it’s been, the slower I started shrinking? So I could still be getting smaller, just… Really slowly.”

“Huh… Do you know why you suddenly started shrinking?” Nevin prompted as he gently scooped up his boyfriend, bringing the other in close and pressing a kiss to the top of the other’s head.

“N… Hmm… Well, Isaac and me were hanging out together when Error showed up. He dragged us with him to deal with some sort of cursed doll. We managed to break the curse… At least I think we did? But the demonic spirit or whatever was that made it alive or whatever said that we’d regret doing it, and that we’d learn what it was like to suffer as it had done.” Chris answered honestly “I would have texted you for help in dealing with it, but Error said that the creature gained power with the use of electronics, so he made us ditch our phones.”

“… You got cursed by a possessed doll? … Wait does that mean that Isaac and Error are also Tiny?” Nevin’s eyes widened a little and he nearly doubled over with laughter, not wanting to accidentally hurt the other, though the mental image of the self-proclaimed school king being so tiny was the funniest thing he’d heard of all week. “I’m going to borrow your computer - see if there’s anything on the web about a cures like this.”

“I’ve been trying to look it up on my phone, and there’s apparently something called a ‘bittybones curse’ but the websites won’t load correctly on my phone.” Cross grumbled, looking incredibly adorable in his thin grey t-shirt and black sweatpants. He shivered a little and asked “… I need to stay warm, so either hold me closer or put me in my sock-nest please.”

“… I have a couple of granola bars in my backpack, if you want to eat that, also a short water bottle I won in PE. Drew and I were the only survivors in a brutal dodgeball war today. It was a lot of fun.” Nevin offered, a worried frown appearing on his face as he looked his boyfriend over.

“I… Please. My poptart supply is dangerous low, and I’ve been dreading trying to get more water to drink at this size.” Cross answered after a moment, his eyes wide and pleading.

Nevin nodded and got the necessary items - unable to help but open the water bottle for the other - unsure as to whether or not he could manage to do so himself, but also not wanting to make the other mad for babying him. He walked over to the computer and - after Cross gave him the password - started to look up this bitty bones curse.

~

Two hours of frantic research later, and Nevin sighed “So, from every resource that seems the least bit credible, you���re probably not going to get any shorter. That’s the good news.”

Chris squinted at him “What, I don’t get to choose between good and bad news?” From the look on his boyfriend’s face… Oh fuck what had Error gotten him into this time? “… Alright… What stupid shit do we have to do in order to undo the curse now?”

“For one thing, I have to know for sure if it was just you who was cursed, or Isaac and Edward too. Because the curse has to be broken on the three of you simultaneously, or it won’t work. the second thing is, you’re going to be stuck like this for a week, minimum.” Nevin began, sighing a little and shaking his head. “… Also you and anyone else who has definitely been cursed at the same time has to live together, while being cared for by someone who genuinely cares for you and those who were also cursed… Shit. It seems as if I have to get Drew involved in this if Error’s been cursed too. They are dating after all.” This was not the way he would want their activities to be revealed to his twin brother.

“I’ll text them and ask if they’ve been cursed too.” Cross responded, his voice adorably squeaky. “I really don’t want to live with Error for a week. That would suck… Also how are we going to explain this to our parents? And your grandma… And Drew?”

“I… I don’t know! One step at a time, Cross. We need to figure out if it’s just you, or if more people have been cursed.” Nightmare responded, restless and unsure. There were also a couple of other ways to break the curse - but there was no way that he could afford any of those cures. Also it could put Chris in a lot of pain, so he’d rather not risk it.

“… Isaac and Error have both been cursed. They’re at Barry’s place right now, and apparently their parents are all freaking out super bad… And Isaac just sent me his address - so we should probably go.” Chris responded uncomfortably, shivering a little bit more.

“Okay - we should probably leave a not for your dad - in case he wonders where you’ve wandered off to. I’ll be sure to grab your phone and charger too.” Nevin offered, turning off the other’s computer, walking over to the other’s bed and carefully stuffing a bunch of Chris’s socks together so that it formed a sort of thick, tiny sleeping bag “Okay, hop in. This should help you stay warm.”

“Okay… I’ve almost finished texting Isaac, telling him that we’re headed over.” Chris responded, tapping out the message with his hands, grateful for auto-fill to reduce how much time it was taking.

~

To both of theirs mild surprise, Isaac’s mom insisted on coming to pick them up - despite the fact that it was less than a ten minute walk to Barry’s house - but neither one of them was going to question it. Nevin was a little unsure as to how to react as he’d never met Isaac’s mother before - knowing that she was very busy as a… Therapist? Psychologist? Something like that. He was busy trying to hold onto his boyfriend’s sock-sleeping bag carefully, holding the other close to his chest.

She tried to start a conversation with him a couple of different times on the very brief drive over, but all Nightmare could do was stare at Cross and try not to panic. He looked so tiny and vulnerable and… There was something strangely familiar about this situation, although why, he couldn’t tell. He could also sense both of the others’ concern as well.

One of Barry’s parents answered the door and gestured for him to come in, which Nightmare did as he rushed straight for the lorekeeper of the school, his other best friend, and Error. The latter was wrapped up in several long scarves and looked half-asleep. Ink was snuggled up in a mitten, drawing furiously with the end of a crayon nub, looking up as he came over “Oh, hey Nevin!”

“Heya Isaac.” Nightmare responded with a small smile as he set a tired Cross down… Only to pick him back up again as the other fussed a little. “Hey… Shh… It’s okay Chris, I’ve got you.”

“Thanks, Nev’… Just wanna be close…” Cross mumbled, exhausted and unhappy. He nibbled on a bit of granola bar, mostly just wanting to sleep.

“That’s okay, I’ve got you.” Nightmare answered back, voice warm and gentle. Chris relaxed a little and beamed up at him happily, snuggling a little closer to him.

Barry was sitting near him, hovering closer to Isaac and Error, worried and unsure as to what to do.

“Nevin, would you please put Christopher down for a moment?” Isaac’s mom asked, her expression neutral, but her emotions chaotic.

Crap. He suspected that he was about to get interrogated. But Nevin wondered if they would believe him if he told them the truth “I… Okay.” He put down the fussy Cross, setting him close to Isaac and made his way over to her. “Yes, ma'am?” He wasn’t normally this polite, but he figured that it wouldn’t hurt anything.

“… Do you know how they might have ended up this way? I know that you and Chris have become good friends with Isaac…” She asked, her voice kind but firm.

“I… Uh…” He glanced at her for a moment, fidgeting “… Chris told me that he, Isaac and Edward dealt with some sort of cursed doll yesterday, and that the spirit that possessed them cursed them to understand how it felt.”

“At least you’re actually talking - neither Edward nor Isaac would say a thing. They just said that they woke up and realized that they were shrinking. Didn’t know how it was happening or why it was possible. Honestly, it’s as if they don’t know that we’re aware that they have… Unusual abilities.” One of Error’s parents grumbled, rubbing their face with a hand and sighing “Thank you for telling the truth… Nevin, I believe? Even if it does sound a little out there.”

“I… Y-You… E-Edward what?” Nevin stuttered, trying to hide the fact that he was unsurprised by the fact that Error had powers… He was surprised that his parents were aware of this.

“Honestly, do you all think that we’re blind? I’ve never seen Isaac take to others so quickly - apart from Barry, who has powers of his own. I figured that you, Cross and Edward had to have powers, from the way he lights up about each of you. He has other friends, yes… But he hasn’t connected as much to them as he has to you three.” Ink’s mother responded with an amused smile. 

“Oh… Uh… I’ll.. Uhm, unless there’s anything else that you want I should… Probably head home, actually… My grandma and brother are probably going to be worried. Should’ve been home a while ago… Haha…” Nevin responded, edging slowly towards the door before running. It was cowardly, but he had no idea how to react. Experience had taught him not to trust most adults. He paused at the door, his gaze flickering between the group of genuinely concerned parents (which was so strange to sense) and his friends… And Error, tempted to snatch them up. But then one of Barry’s parents tried to grab him and Nevin ducked, throwing the other over his shoulder and running out the door, headed straight home.

[across-the-music]

Long post about my ED, recovery, and self love

A number of things have happened these past few days that call out for a reflection.

I have an eating disorder. I've lived my life with this partner for around six years, since I was only twelve years old. With ups and downs I've been on a journey for recovery. This is path is a constant struggle, that requires a lot of effort, and it never truly ends.

I'm not overweight. I do have a body that doesn't exactly fit into society's model look. I'm short, I have big hips, a large back, thick legs and huge butt. And I have done terrible things to this body of mine, because it doesn't fit into society's ideal.

And in the past few years, even though I don't starve myself anymore, even though I've stopped puking and even though I gravitated into a "healthy" lifestyle (exercise, good meals) there's always a voice in the back of my head saying I'm fat and guilty for it. As if I was guilty of living.

So I still exercise and count calories. Or I did. Things changed a bit this year. And I couldn't be happier.

I have two friends who don't have a diagnosed ED. They haven't been checked out by doctors, they haven't had their brains poked by psychologists and psychiatrists. But they struggle with their "not pretty for society" bodies. They struggle with food. With self esteem. With living.

One of them tells me they cry in front of a mirror when they have to go out clubbing because they can't find anything that, according to her mom, looks good on her. She's beautiful. And this is not me talking, this is every guy she has eating from the palm of her hand. And everybody mocks her because she is allegedly fat. When she's not even chubby. So she struggles with that constant reminder that she doesn't fit into society.

I keep more in touch with the other friend because we're closer, and we have conversations about this topic pretty often. Because pretty often she reminds herself she hates her body. She talks to me about it because I understand her, because I know how it feels, and I find myself reliving moments of my life through her.

Yesterday, she told me she was not going to a party because there was a pool and she can't wear bikinis nor see other girls with bikinis, because she knows she doesn't look like them.

The first 3 years of my recovery I invented excuses to my friends in order to avoid going out with them. I said I couldn't stand fast food so I wouldn't have to eat at McDonald's or Burger King. Because I couldn't eat that many calories. My brain wouldn't let me. Now I feel I skipped years of my life because of that.

I didn't eat at quinceañera's parties, I didn't eat at parties in general. And I have developed digestive problems because I kept myself away of certain foods. I'm lactose intolerant and I now I'll never be able to share pizza with friends (tho I also hate it bc melted cheese is gross, but that's besides the point) because I swear it makes me feel terrible abdominal pain.

I hated guys because I constantly felt they were thinking how ugly I really look and that has deprived me from enjoying things like sex, nights out, and even relationship attempts. Because it felt like drowning having to eat in front of a guy. I constantly felt boys were judging me.

ED's affect your health but they also affect your social life and that has an emotional impact that is hard to explain. I felt guilty when doing all of those things: going out with friends, eating at McDonald's, undressing in front of someone else, wearing shorts, tanktops and bikinis, taking pictures of myself (did I mention I only started taking photos and uploading them on instagram on my second year of recovery?), dating, eating the entire plate of a meal even if it was so delicious I wanted more. I felt guilty for living. For living a normal teenage life.

This year I have made amazing progress, of course taking into consideration the advances I made in past years of recovery. I've enjoyed myself, I've done things I had never done like eating full meals and eating fast food more than once a year. Because I felt comfortable. Because people made me feel comfortable.

And I have to mention that these past few months have been very important, because I have never felt more in peace with my own body. I'd like to clarify that I still have that voice in the back of my head but I can ignore it like a champ. And it all has to do with the people that surround me.

The second friends has recently found a boyfriend. And she told me yesterday that she doesn't want him to see her because she's disgusting. They don't have intimacy.

I have also recently started dating someone (actually it's been a couple of months). I realised something changed thanks to his constant reminders that I am beautiful.

I was on a trip this year that students completing high school traditionally do here, and it consists of going out clubbing every night. Night outfits were a nightmare for me, because of my body type.

I sent pics of my outfits every night of this trip to my partner and oh my god he made feel like the prettiest, sexiest girl on the planet. And so I didn't mind if the tanktop I bought didn't look like it did on the mannequin when I wore it.

We went out eating. And I could it with freedom, because even if he mocks me and calls me gordita (which is "fatty" but has a different connotation here, it's a like a loving pet name), he tells how obsessed he is with my legs, my ass and my body in general. He tells me how my fat cheeks are so puffy he loves to squeeze them because he feels happy and how he thinks they're the prettiest things he's ever seen. Because even when I feel disgusting he tells me I look gorgeous.

And so my friend hasn't had sex with his boyfriends because she can't overcome this imposition of society to have a certain body. And I can safely say I have never felt more comfortable undressing in front of someone than with this guy.

So much so that yesterday I wore a bikini in front of everyone and I felt confident about myself. He has given me confidence.

And I've never gone out so much to bars and restaurants, I have never wore so many different outfits, I have never felt so much love for this body. And it's because of this new environment. Because of my friend's telling me I look pretty. Because of my boyfriend making me feel safe. And because of feminism. It has given me the tools to accept that the normative that society has made us praise IS WRONG, is unreal. It has given me the ability to perform art with my body in front of everyone and not be afraid to do it. Because there's not reason to be afraid of living.

And now I eat. I eat everything. I enjoy snacks with friends, I enjoy beer, and I enjoy dinner dates. I don't feel guilty anymore.

I feel like I'm getting back all the years and experiences anorexia took away from me. And I won't stop untill my friends can feel the same way.

[kenshiliker]

mcfuck load of things i was tagged in going here thanks everyone that tagged me & im sorry for this Entire Mess

Also I was tagged in 3 different things that have like similar fuckign questions so im jst gonna stick them all into 1 tag bc if not you’d have me repeating my damn names 18 times and thts no fun for Anyone)

Meet the blogger meme (Tagged by @bodhierso, thank u ark!! @woehuxbub tHJANKS FAMTHER & @orsonkraennic)

i. name:  徐

ii. nickname: OH LORD I HAVE SO MANY um I’ll just put the main ones; Brucie, Jerry, Tiaan, King Dickard II

iii. zodiac sign: Sagittarius / Dragon (Chinese Zodiac)

iv. height: ??? UH I think 160 cm the last I measured but I’m not sure. Over 5′3″ iirc.

v. orientation: Ace (the helpful place)

vi. ethnicity: Chinese 

vii. favorite fruit: Orange, Strawberry and Banana, L E M O N (u fucKIGN COWARDS)

viii. favorite season: Autumn/Winter but I’m stuck in hell so guess I’ll Die

ix. favorite book / book series: I don’t read many books but I like Shakespeare’s stuff & also Sherlock Holmes

x. favorite flower: Hibiscus rosa-sinensis (this is as patriotic as I get tbh), PLANTA GENISTA

xi. favorite scent: Nothing too strong or I’ll feel nauseous. Maybe a soft vanilla? ...And maybe orange. Or Lemon.

xii. favorite color: ORANGE (funny story is that my dad’s fav colour was orange and I decided to project frm a young age and wow guess what Orange has been my fav colour ever since), White, Black, Blue, Red

xiii. coffee, tea or cocoa: T e a slorp slorp

xiv. average sleep hours: Depends on what I have planned the next day. Lately (due to exam month) it’s been about 5 hrs per week so guess I’ll die

xv. cat or dog person: I like both as long as I’m not being chased

xvi. favorite fictional characters: ghhh Bruce Wayne, Tiaan Jerjerrod, Illya Kuryakin, B.J. Hunnicutt, Freddy Newandyke, Cal Lightman, (and Duke of Aumerle & Richard II if they count,,, hte Shookspeare version)

xvii. dream trip: UK,,, Get Me Out Of Here, 

xviii. blogs created: 4 (This one, TMFU blog, Secret Shakespeare Blog & Secret Art Blog) (I haven’t posted on the latter two) (That’s why they’re a ‘secret’)

xix. number of followers: 940 here (how even the Fuck) & 1582 on the TMFU blog.

xx.  random fact: I recently sat on the hard wood floor for 10 hours straight (s/o to you if you remember this) and felt myself just physically shrivel up and die. I literally hurt everywhere bc if I wasn’t sitting down, I was laying on the ground and gOD It took me a week to feel better but yeah god 11/10 would not recommend

xxi. number of blankets you sleep with: There’s like 4 on my bed lmao I’M LIVING

xxii.  blog created: I’ve had a tumblr since like... 2010 and I didn’t really use it until 2012, 2013 was my first year I was really active

xxiii. nationality: Malaysian

Tagged by Krenny again, to answer all these questions, and then tag 15 people 5 things you’ll find in my bag: SUPERMAN WALLET, Phone, Powerbank + Cable, Earphones, Art Supplies

5 things you’ll find in my bedroom: 5000 Stuffed Animals, DC shit, SW garb, The decapitated head of Jar Jar Binks that greets the visitors, Convention merch (+4 GAY REALLY FUCKING GAY, SO GAY THAT IF MY PARENTS FOUND THEM I’D BE FUCKING DEAD, fanbooks of TMFU which are in Chinese, sent by my lovely Internet Sister)

5 things I’ve always wanted to do: Get some air-dry paper clay and make tiny sculptures or something, learn how to paint properly, have nice handwriting, visit the UK again, WATCH A PLAY

5 things that make me happy: My unhealthy coping mechanisms, my favs, my friends!!, drawing (sometimes), reading/learning about something I’m interested in

5 things I’m currently into: TIM ROTH, LIE TO ME, Shakespeare, Star Wars, DC

5 things on my to do list: Get good fuckin grades for once in my damn life aye, finish watching Lie To Me, finish reading As You Like It and Othello, finish the school year & be done with it for the rest of my life, memorise all the experiments for the physics syllabus by Thursday if not my teacher will literally grill me

and lastly, tagged by @bunn1cula​ and Krenny again! Thank u two am loaf the both of u,

the last

1. drink: water 2. phone call: irl friend that is saved as ‘Mr. Pink’ in my phone (as per their request fhghg) 3. text message: ‘👌👌’ or if chats count then:

4. song you listened to: HOOKED ON A FEELING 5. time you cried: Yesterday while watching Lie To Me 6. dated someone twice: Nooooot yet 7. kissed someone and regretted it: NOT FOR ME THnks 8. been cheated on: ?? I don’t know. Probably not. 9. lost someone special: Yes 10. been depressed: Yeah, still am, but I think it’s not so bad nowadays (hopefully). 11. got drunk and thrown up: Never

3 favourite colours

12. Orange 13. White 14. Black

in the last year have you

15. made new friends: Yeah, definitely!  16. fallen out of love: NOT YET BUT MAYBE SOON 17. laughed until you cried: GOD A HECK OF A LOT OF TIMES 18. found out someone was talking about you: No, not really. I mean, there’s an asshole in my class that loves talking shit about me but I honestly don’t give a fuck about him he’s Irrelavant. 19. met someone who changed you: I don’t really know,,, I think I’m still the same? 20. found out who your friends are: I’ve never really had an issue with anyone, really. Maybe except one or two people, but yeah, the rest of y’all are alright. 21. kissed someone on your facebook list: NO

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: About 60/93 of them. I plan to boot a ton of them after I graduate tho. 23. do you have any pets: UNFORTUNATELY NO but I’d love a cat 24. do you want to change your name: UM SURE I mean it’d be kinda nice bc I hate when people I hate tainted my name by calling it, so yea, Yes 25. what did you do for your last birthday: I don’t think I did anything at all. 26. what time did you wake up: 6.30 a.m. (gotta love tht School Life) 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: ,,,Watching Lie To Me, reading fics instead of studying for my exam, 28. name something you can’t wait for: GRADUATING and getting tf outta here. 29. when was the last time you saw your mum: Last night ghghg 31. what are you listening to right now: Stuck In The Middle With You 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: I was the person named Tom once, so, yes. 33. something that is getting on your nerves: My shitty fucking class/school. 34. most visited website: Tumblr, YouTube 35. hair colour: Dark brown 36. long or short hair: Short! 37. do you have a crush on someone: Mnnn 50/50 38. what do you like about yourself: I’m kinda sorta funny & I can draw sometimes 39. piercings: None 40. blood type: A+ 41. nickname: Jerry, Brucie, Tiaan, King Dickard II 42. relationship status: Single & That’s Alrighty 43. zodiac: Sagittarius 44. pronouns: He/Him or They/Them 45. favourite tv show: RN IT’S LIE TO ME (TIM ROTH COULD FUCKIGNG LIE TO ME RIGHT IN MY FACE & I’D BE LIKE WOW UR TELLIGN THE TRUTH I BELIEVE IN U), but I also like M*A*S*H, The Man From U.N.C.L.E. and The Twilight Zone 46. tattoos: I idon’t really want any! 47. right or left handed: Right

first

48. surgery: None to my knowledge, or maybe a few when I was super young bc my moves (lungs) are weak babe 49. piercing: None (my mom keeps trying to get me to pierce my ear but it’s not my thing, & also if I do get it i’ll only get one and it’ll be the Gay Ear) 50. sport: Football, I think? In any case, I’m bomb as hell at getting hit in the fucking head by the sports balls.  51. vacation: London or Australia iirc 52. pair of trainers: I don’t remember either, I can barely remember anything from 2016.

more general

53. eating: Nothing at the moment 54. drinking: Water 55. i’m about to: Nap or watch Lie To Me (I haven’t decided) 56. waiting for: My exams to be over 57. want: Nothing at the moment 58. get married: Sure? I’m not really opposed to marriage as a whole, but if it starts getting yikes you bet your ass I’m gonna fucking bounce 59. career: I don’t have a career rn but I’d like to do illustration/concept art it seems p cool. Either that or become a psychologist and charge people $30 for readings.

which is better

60. hugs or kisses: I don’t like either 61. lips or eyes: Eyes 62. shorter or taller: I don’t really care. I love both short girls and guys (@tiM), and tall girls and guys are just as good! 63. older or younger: Doesn’t really matter to me either. 64. nice arms or nice stomach: Also doesn’t really matter but if ur arms are good I’m definitely eyes emoji af 65. hook up or relationship: Relationship. 66. troublemaker or hesitant: See, I’d say hesitant but I don’t really know that either. Just as long as you’re not doing some stupid shit we’re good.

have you ever

67. kissed a stranger: No 68. drank hard liquor: Nope.. Well, not to my knowledge. 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: I don’t wear either ghgng 70. turned someone down: No 71. sex on the first date: N O 72. broken someone’s heart: UH Yeah when I was 13 (how even the fucK.) 73. had your heart broken: yEP 74. been arrested: Never bc I’m a cop, Larry 75. cried when someone died: Yes. I’m okay throughout the funeral but the minute it registers that I’m never gonna see them again, I’m gooooone af. Even if I didn’t particularly like the person when they were alive. 76. fallen for a friend: YEAH!!! But it’s usually one of those new-friend crushes sourry.

do you believe in

77. yourself: I mean, Sometimes. It’s like... Can I do it? Most Likely. Did I do it correctly? Most Likely Not. 78. miracles: Not really, no. 79. love at first sight: Yeah, sure, I mean everyone’s different, so who’s to say just because I don’t feel it someone else doesn’t. 80. santa claus: No way my dude 81. kiss on the first date: Depends bc at mY AGE I’m not boutta put my face anywhere near someone else’s thts jst weird 82. angels: Mayhaps,,,, I don’t believe that they don’t exist, if that makes sense.

other

83. current best friend’s name: Mmmnnnn Kylogram (Kyle Ron), maybe? I’ve a few best friends. 84. eye colour: Dark brown, they look kinda nice in the sun I guess. 85. favourite movie: RESERVOIR DOGS, Four Rooms, Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead, The Lion in Winter, TMFU, Wonder Woman, ROTJ, Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade

--

This is a big Mess, but yeA I’m tagging whoever was mentioned above & no one else bc this has gone on for long enough, to do the one you weren’t tagged in or hell do the first one if you want, bc that one is a compilation of like 3 different tag memes ghfh. Good bye u all.

(OH YEAH if ur a mutual/follower/whoEVER who sees this feel free to do if if you’d like!! Say I tagged you if you’d like to c:)

[chromsai]

Sai, I just went and watched Yugioh Everything's video on Yusaku and Aoi having Autism and Depresson, respectively. While he makes some solids points and I agree with them having mental problems, he basically said Vrains is the first yugioh to talk about 'such dark topics.' If your up to it could you bring up some characters in previous ygo series (Arc-V or all your choice) that implied to have mental problems cause Vrains is not the first by a long shot lmao.

Lmao sorry this answer is kinda late since the past few days have been busy for me and ironically enough you sent this right when I just got back from a grad school info session (regarding psych programs ofc) which made me realize I kinda wanna pursue a career more along research in the field of abnormal psychology which is one of my stronger areas of knowledge in psychology already anyway. I just really like it that much.

So yeah I did see this ask like almost right when you sent it but it was late and I had just gotten home after a nice day and YE’s videos haven’t been making me too happy lately so ofc sorry I kinda avoided watching it that night cuz I didn’t wanna ruin my nice day (just in case). But now that I watched it, well as far as I can remember he didn’t outright say that this is the first time a Yugioh’s dealt with these issues before (but I can see how you got that he perhaps implied it).

That all being said, I still have just a, I’d say, general yet above-average knowledge in these subjects (hey I have a degree in Psych, yes, but that doesn’t make me an expert by any means and I’m not afraid to say that, hell I love learning new things about psych all the time) so please keep that in mind (also please keep in mind too that I cannot professionally diagnose anyone, but for the sake of discussion about the psychology in fiction, I can definitely give my thoughts on what would be the most probably diagnosis for certain characters). Besides that though, if YE does actually believe that this is the first time these kinds of issues have ever been dealt with in Yugioh, well wow idk how much he’s been paying attention before this...

(Long read with further examples + explanations from characters in each series under the cut)

Regarding his statements on the Vrains characters and the disorders he mentioned, I’ll give it to him. In fact, I too am pretty sure by now that all of Yusaku’s “quirks” point to Autism, though, and YE didn’t mention this so idk how knowledgeable he is regarding other personality disorders, he also seems to show symptoms of OCPD (obsessive-compulsive); these include being obsessed or preoccupied with making lists and keeping track of small details, over preoccupation with work or meeting goals to the point of neglecting your social life or forming close relations, unwillingness to see ethics or values in someone else’ light, being stubborn, etc. Wouldn’t surprise me if he has both since there’s a high co-morbidity between ASD and OCPD.

In regards to Aoi, again yes I agree. Girl has depression. It’s very obvious (this I can say with confidence as someone who has suffered previously from it [note: I sought help and let’s just say I’m very glad I did]. The Paranoid Personality Disorder... (I’m gonna be honest.... I didn’t pay enough attention to Aoi’s character enough to determine a firmer answer and I don’t really feel like rewatching the ep). According to him, it’s a possible thing. He did mention that she could just be acting that way because her whole entire life she’s been kinda used so she has a general distrust of people, but that’s just the thing. If in fact he’s correct about her symptoms matching up, it doesn’t necessarily matter if she’s acting this way due to her childhood trauma, in fact, that’s even more reason to validate her suffering from PPD (another area I feel more confident about in psych is child/adolescent development and hey guess what, lots of personality disorder symptoms start showing up during childhood or are even a direct cause of childhood trauma).

Speaking of childhood trauma, you wanted to know characters from other series that have mental illnesses/suffer from personality disorders? Well... (*cough cough* as a psychologist, why do you think I enjoyed Arc V so much?)...Here’s a quick list of just a few select characters I can think of:Arc V:-Yuya (remember, the childhood trauma I mentioned): Oh my poor boy suffers from dysthymia. Again, I’m pretty confident here because I can relate (because I suffer from it too ahaha). While we don’t know exactly for how long, it’s been at least three years with it (ugh) since his father’s disappearance and all the bullying. He shows so many signs of it throughout the show (it would be pointless to get screencaps because the signs are literally everywhere): dysthymia (sometimes called “persistent depressive disorder”) is noted by sadness, anger, irritability, mood swings, loss of appetite, insomnia (did you notice in Synchro when we was feeling depressed in his room he didn’t eat at all and stayed up all night despite being noticeably tired), indecisiveness, low self-esteem, among others. I’m sure people might argue against me, trying to say “oh well he’s energetic for the most part and still smiles a lot” well guess what, there’s lots of entertainers, comedians, performers, and just overall really sociable people who do a terrifyingly good job hiding it.I saw someone once mention that they headcanoned Yuya also has Histrionic Personality Disorder and well... he actually does show signs of it but not so much that he actually meets criteria. Even for being an entertainer tho, he shows this more than the others (either Dennis, Yuzu, or even Yusho), but again, can’t be diagnosed with it.Lastly, and this is more of a post-canon thought regarding the prognosis of his mental health... he’s definitely gonna deal with some dissociative symptoms for the rest of his life (or until somehow, some way they find a way to separate him and the other Yuus, and even then still...). There is just no way in hell you can convince me that he’s not gonna experience dissociation on a regular basis with 3 other people living inside him. Same goes for Yuzu. (Side note: RIP my heart.)

-Shun: He suffers from PTSD. Oh man he’s kind of textbook PTSD: irritableness, mistrust, social issolation, flashbacks, hostility, fear, anxiety, paranoia, agitation, hyper-vigilance, etc. (I’d also say Yuto and Kaito suffer this too).

-Reria: Also suffers from PTSD, but since Reira is much younger, coping with childhood PTSD is a lot harder and leads to more frequent panic attacks, flashbacks, intrusive or unwanted thoughts, nightmares, avoidant behavior, etc.

-Yuri: Conduct Disorder, aka the precursor to Antisocial Personality Disorder. He’s 14 so he can’t really be diagnosed as the second. Anyways, what really tipped me off about him having this is his blatant disregard for any remorse towards harming others. He just doesn’t feel it. On the contrary, he straight up says he enjoys it, says he needs it “just like breathing”, he’s an overall really violent kid and starts fights with literally anyone that gets in his way (like... it’s even his catchphrase “You’re in my way!”), has no knows long term close relationships with anyone (reeaaally wish they had given us more of him and Dennis together tho...), and he’s known to deceive, trick, or lie to others with no guilt at all. (He’s also seen as similar to past villains of Yugioh, outright disproving the implication that Vrains is the first Yugioh to deal with personality or mental disorder issues).

-Zarc: Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Again, another textbook example. And yes, similar to Aoi’s possible Paranoid Personality Disorder, this is canonically induced into his personality as a result of the society he lived in praising his violent duel style and eventual lust for power due in part to the same reason. But just because it was induced due to circumstance doesn’t make it any less valid. It’s another form of trauma, just like Aoi’s whole “being used all her life” led her to develop PDD.

And well there’s more examples in Arc V (you can also argue that Shingo also suffers from NPD to some extent, etc.) but I think those are the biggest ones I can think of right now.

And of course, though I’ve seen them all, I know Arc V the best + it’s just the one that’s in my most recent memory so it’s easier to talk about them, but some other quick examples from the series that I can think of:

DM:-Kaiba: Again, Narcissistic Personality Disorder.-Marik: I think he’s a strong candidate for being diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (at least the way his villainous arc portrayed him as).-Bakura: Actually an adult so actual Antisocial Personality Disorder.

GX:-Judai: Depression & Dissociation. Yep.-Ryo Marufuji/Hell Kaiser: Definitely could argue that he displays signs of Sadisitic Personality Disorder, just keep in mind that it is no longer included in the DSM-V so it is not something someone would be typically diagnosed with professionally.-Manjoume: Another Narcissist.

5D’s:-Jack Atlas: Okay so he’s more of an accurate example of Histrionic Personality Disorder, minus the sexual criteria (which, if the Yugioh anime genre/audience allowed, I’m sure would be plausible since he also displays signs of NPD, implying that he might actually want that kind of physical/superficial attention).-Aki: Also like Aoi, displayed symptoms of PPD, though I’d argue she definitely has it and just learns to cope over time after befriending Yusei & co.-Sherry: Shows signs of high functioning ASD (being perfectionist and being obsessed with finding out about her parents murder), but ASD isn’t something I’m too confident talking about yet so maybe don’t quote me on this.-Divine: I’d say you can argue he’s has Antisocial Personality Disorder.

Zexal:-Vector: Another one with.... I mean... he’s not really 13 or 14, he’s actually, what, like 100s of years old? So instead of Conduct Disorder, he actually has Antisocial... technically...-Fuya: OOOOOHHHH You thought I wouldn’t remember a character like him??? (Again, as a psychologist, these are the characters I like the most). He’s memorable to me, despite being a minor character, cuz I’d say he definitely displays signs of having Avoidant Personality Disorder, especially with regards to using his Esper Robin personality to avoid all those intrusive, self-conscious thoughts he doesn’t find pleasant.-Shark/Ryoga/Nasch: Also has PTSD.-IV: He’s borderline Antisocial. Not quite. But almost there.

OOOKAYY Well anyways, those were just a bunch of examples. There’s way more, I’m sure that I missed A TON. But yes it’s as you said, Vrains is definitely NOT the first time in Yugioh history where characters have had to struggle with mental health / personality disorder issues. Far from it.

And wow actually thank you for the ask! This was really fun to think about and I welcome the discussion any time! Anyone, don’t be afraid to let me know if there’s stuff I might have left out or if there’s anything wrong with this or any arguments for or against any of this.

[hwalights]

get to know me tag

I was tagged by @missminkim 🌼 thank you sm for tagging me, glory!! 💖

The Last…

Drink: grape kool-aid

Phone Call: I don’t remember, since I don’t really get/make calls

Text Message: “LMAO OMG” i sent my sister pics of jaebum and she said she was pregnant with twins

Song You Listened To: Bomb by Ravi

Time You Cried: I don’t remember exactly when but it was bc of something I read

Have You Ever…

Dated Someone Twice: Nope, the last time I dated someone was over a year ago aka my first ever relationship

Been Cheated On: no

Kissed Someone And Regretted It: I haven’t even had my first kiss yet LOL

Lost Someone Special: yeah

Been Depressed: yeah

Gotten Drunk And Thrown Up: no

List Three Favorite Colors…

1: Black

2: Green

3: Pastel pink

i’m really starting to like yellow tho

In The Last Year Have You…

Made New Friends:I think so?

Fallen Out Of Love: no

Laughed Until You Cried: No, I’ve never cried while laughing even tho I am CONSTANTLY laughing. Tho I will have an asthma attack sometimes LMAO

Found Out Someone Was Talking About You: no

Met Someone Who Has Changed You: no

Found Out Who Your True Friends Are: I’ve always knew

Kissed Someone On Your FB list: no

Genral…

How Many Of Your FB Friends Do You Know In Real Life: I know a majority lol

Do You Have Any Pets: I have a cat and two puppies!

Do You Want To Change Your Name: I’ve thought about it, but idk

What Did You Do For Your Last Birthday: My stepdad bought me a pizza and I watched Ghost Adventures lol

What Time Did You Wake Up: Around 2pm lol

What Were You Doing At Midnight Last Night: Listening to Jonghyun while on Tumblr

Name Something You Cannot Wait For: HIXTAPE!!!!!!!!!

When Was The Last Time You Saw Your Mother: An hour ago

What Is One Thing You Wish You Could Change About Your Life: Being able to stand up to my dad

What Are You Listening To Right Now: Let Me Out by Jonghyun aka the song that saved my existence

Have You Ever Talked To A Person Named Tom: Yep

Something That Is Getting On Your Nerves: Nothing really

Most Visited Website: Tumblr, AO3, YouTube, and FB

Elementary: In Ohio

High School: In Florida, I’ll be a Junior

College/University: not there yet lol

Hair Color: Black, but naturally browm

Long Or Short Hair: Short

Do You Have A Crush On Someone: no

What Do You Like About Yourself: Uhm,,,, I like my hands and that I can draw well? Lol

Piercings: Septum and I’m getting a lip done soon 💕💕

Blood Type: I have no idea LMAO

Nickname: Well my name is Destiny so I get called Des or D

Relationship status: Single

Zodiac Sign: Libra

Pronouns: she/her

Favorite TV Show: I don’t really watch tv anymore, but Ghost Adventures, Sons Of Anarchy, Criminal Minds, and Rick and Morty are some that I like

Tattoos: None yet

Right Or Left Handed: right

First…

Surgery: When I broke ny elbow when I was like 6????

Piercing: my ears but it’s been YEARS since I had an earring so the hole closed

Sport Played: None

Vacation: I’ve never been on one :(

Eating: Nothing

Drinking: Nothing

I’m About To: Scroll through Tumblr for the rest of the night

Listening To: Hallelujah by Jonghyun YOU GOT ME SINGING HALLELUJAAAAHHHHH

Waiting For: Nothing

Want: Some ice cream

Get Married: It would be nice to be ig???

Career: I want to be a writer and a psychologist (with being an artist on the side)

Which Is Better…

Hugs Or Kisses: I’ve never been kissed, so hugs

Lips Or Eyes: BOTH!!!! I LOVE WHEN PEOPLE SMILE AND THEIR EYES CRINKLE SKSGUAGA

Shorter Or Taller: Taller

Older Or Younger: Older

Nice Arms Or Nice Stomach: NICE HANDS AND LEGS 👀👀👀

Sensitive Or Loud: I don’t care

Hookup Or Relationship: Relationship

Troublemaker Or Hesitant: Hesitant

Have You Ever…

Kissed A Stranger: No

Drank Hard Liquor: No

Lost Glasses/Contact Lenses: No, since I don’t wear them

Turned Someone Down: Yes

Sex On First Date: No

Broken Someone’s Heart: I sure jope not :(

Had Your Heart Broken: Yeah

Been Arrested: Nope

Cried When Someone Died: Yeah

Fallen For A Friend: YEAH LOL WE DATED FOR A WHILE but we aren’t anymore, we’re still best friends tho 😊😊

Do You Believe In…

Yourself: No :///

Miracles: Ehh, I’m indifferent to it

Love At First Sight: No

Santa Claus: No

Kiss On The First Date: No

Angels: Yeah

Other…

Current Best Friend’s Name: Alex

Eye Color: Hazel

Favorite Movie: I have a lot lol but I love The Crow

I tag @zombifyoongi and @jacksoons. I’m not tagging anybody else, but if anyone wants to do this, go ahead!!

Thank you again for the tag, @missminkim 💖💕

[peach-cake-slice]

I honestly have many OCs, most part of them might don’t be interesting for most part of you but I guess I’ll talk about one of them anyway xP And for this I’ll use my Yuri on Ice OC, called Max. I made him for a RP with @chubbybloomykitty and @blackcatfishingdreams where all the skaters are judging on a kind of “The Voice” skating version xP And our OCs are competeting on this contest having Yuuri and Viktor as their couchies :) If you want to know more about it send an ask to me or to one of my two friends xP But before I start answering this I’ll talk a little about Max [WARNING: THIS CHARACTHER IS QUEER, IF YOU DON’T SUPPORT IT DON’T SEND ME BULLSHIT TALKING ABOUT HOW BEING QUEER IS WRONG OR ANY “PENIS AND VAGINA” SHIT. THANK YOU? THANK YOU] Max is an 17 years old, AMAB (assigned male at birth) boyflux with a short curly hair (sometimes leave it straight), brown eyes and white skin. He likes to use make up and “girly” clouthes sometimes but usely goes for the most neutral visual they can. You can use whatever pronouns with them (from he to zir) and he won’t feel bad, they just don’t want you to treat them as a cisgender boy xP Ok, I guess it was all I could say before starting (I should really try to draw them -v-’’’) let’s go then <3

1. Their voice

Max’s voice is pretty chill and soft, it’s not so deep but also not so acute but it deppends on their emotions (usually makes a really acute voice when have strong emotions. It’s  unusual from them to make a deep voice, unless they are singing)

2. Their smile

Booooy, he has one of the most beautiful smiles of all my OCs until now. Because of their radiant personality he likes to smile a lot specially close to their friends and loved ones <3 (that doesn’t mean that they can’t be savage or sassy tho (¬ ͜ʖ¬) )

3. Their Greatest Achievement

Welp, that’s a good question... Since we didn’t decided who will win the contest yet I guess their greatest achievement until now was to quit their parents house to pratice their skating and get to be noticed by their idols. It’s something that I didn’t discussed to any of my friends yet but their parents awalys were very queerphobic and never supported their dreams and hobbies. And after their father find out that they had a boyfriend (currently ex bf, but that’s another story...) they reacted very strongly and the only thing that came to Max’s mind was to run away as quick as possible. After this, they made everything they could to be strong and get to an big skating contest despite all prejudice they suffered on the process and show to everyone that queer people (specially nb people) DO exists and can be whatever they want. They never hided their gender identity or their sexuality to anyone since then. So be one of the finalists of a big contest with 2 of their idols was something REALLY important to them.

4. Their insecurities

This is something that Max tries their best to hide from everyone but their past are awalys hunting them. They often gets pretty scared of walking on streets and accidentily meet their parents or their former bf again. Why? Well, since their parents is something obvious let’s just talk about their former bf. Welp, he and Max know each other since they were just children and Max awalys felt something for him. They started dating hided from their parents then ran to live together and help each other with their dreams. He awalys made Max very happy and showed all support in the world with everything Max wanted to do (buy a skirt, learning light make up, change their civil name to their social name, etc...) and Max were very happy thankful for all of this. But then one night, when Max woke up in the middle of night and listened to him talking with someone on the phone about them. When they noticed it, they went to the living room to listen the rest of the conversation he was having and what he heard was “I’m trying what I can to make him realize that this queer thing is bullshit. Even tho *insert Max’s civil name here* seems to want to become a girl he awalys take it back and try to have his maculinity back. Maybe he is just afraid that I broke up with him if he decides to be a girl, or is just confused... I’m trying my best to help him to decide it but he insists on this Non Binary shit”.  Well, short speaking... Max started to cry, slaped his face before he could turn off his phone and ran away one more time. After this all this words kept hunting their mind and sometimes gave him terrible nightmares.

5. Their shortcomings

Max is often very impulsive and don’t think too much before decide something. They never were able to see if they have some depression or anxiety disorder because they never looked for a psychologist or any other specialists to find this out. They are headstrong and don’t give up on one point of view easily (which sometimes is good but sometimes can be really mad).

6. How do they deal with grief.

Skating or simply dancing awalys helped them to deal with anything, specially if this is a happy song, and sometime they just slack off and watch animes or play indie video games <3 (my sweet nerd :’D)

7. How they like to dress

Usually, Max tried to dress as neutral as possible with a large sweatshirt, jeans and sneakers. On special occasions they like to use one of the dress or the skirts their friend usually like to give them <3

8. What they like to eat

*inhales* Ok, we are talking about what they like to eat or what they CAN eat? xP Max usually goes for vegan food not because they are actually vegan, they are more for vegetarian, but because it’s yummy and it helps them to have a good meal and control their weight at the same time (also they LOVE to cook and have a great fun doing all the types of vegan meal by themselve xP)

9. Their theme

Master of Tides - Lindsey Stirling This song was used on their first presentation for the contest and he played as a strong pirate playing with his enemies <3 And this song is the one that I’m planning to use for their final presentation (just thinking tho). And think both fits as their themes because they fit with their strenghtness and their fragility respectively

10. Their fashion sense

They don’t actually have one (?) they just go with the style they are currently into xP They like the punk style and the goth style but it’s awalys that they use it for themselves.

11. Their family life

Max’s family had a rich life and owned a very important executive business company. Lucky for Max, they never got envolved with skating or any kind of  ice sport but it doesn’t make their fear of ocasionally meeting their parents disappear.

12. Their romanticaly life

Max only date once so far and had small relations with some people (usually guys). Max is kinda afraid of seriously moving on and date again and gets really nervous with the idea of falling in love to someone again But to their sadness (or not  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) they are currently between an amazing bigender person they met on the contest’s cerimonial party, called Gemna, and a boy from his team called Toby.

13. Their embarrassing memory from years ago

Being recorded while performing and singing Steven Universe’s song drunk xP (Specially “Giant Woman” and “Do It for Her”)

14. How they react to burning their tongue with food

Covering their mouth and blow all the heat they can out while sheding some little tears :’)

15. How they react to brainfreeze

Put their hand on their head and curse xD

16. Their dreams

Other than just winning the contest, they want to open a LGBT+ Friendly Dancing School <3

17. Their ambitions

To be an inspiration to all queers and see they saying that they changed their life somehow by giving them the hope that they can fight against all their prejudice and be the heck they want to be and do the heck they want to do

18. How they sleep

19. Their reaction to betrayal

Boy, Max can forgive many things but betrayal is not one of them. If they ever find out that someone is betraying them, they will make sure that the person will be cient that they know it and then will treat them like they never had existed and like an invisible person.

20. Their reaction to a mystery love letter

Blushing (!?!?!?) and get really nervous about who sent this xD

21. How they react to pain

.... You mean physical pain or mental pain (?) If it’s mental they try to make their best to don’t show it to anyone as long as they can and to not cry because someone can come and see it or call him and get worried if they don’t hang up.

22. What they are like on two hours of sleep

They never sleep just two hours if someone try to wake them up like this their reaction is just to say “ok” and sleep again against their own will xP

23. How they act when they are sick

Max becomes an unseless vegetable when they are sick and make everything pretty slow, speacially on understanding things xP

24. What motivates them

Other then all their objectives and stuff? THIS GODDAMN SONG! 

25. Why I enjoy them

Boy... They are my child...I don’t know how to explain this, I just love them so much and I want to protect them with all my powers ;u;Aaaaaaand that’s it :3 I hope you enjoy them <3 Tell me if you did!

[meetmyinnerdemons]

150 questions tag

@prettyboialec @here-and-now9 have fun girls

1.Who was the last person you held hands with?

My baby sister

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

Not totally but I’m pretty shy now, I used to be different

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Nobody specifically

4. Are you easy to get along with?

Pretty much, not with strangers but if I know a person it is easy

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

Ask @prettyboialec or @here-and-now9

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

Uhm.... Well, I have this type... Black hair, dark or blue eyes, tall

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

No

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

Wohooo, Benedict Cumberbatch, byyyotch

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Not at all, but just with my friends

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

My mum

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Should I go already?”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

I have one, “Super Psycho Love” by Simon Curtis

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

I love it <3

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Not really, it happens very rarely

15. What good thing happened this summer?

I lost some weight

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

I’ve never kissed anyone

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

Maybe

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

I barely see that person but when I do, yes :)

19. Do you like bubble baths?

I love!

20. Do you like your neighbors?

Barely know them

21. What are you bad habits?

Keeping dirty dishes in my room

22. Where would you like to travel?

America, London, Spain

23. Do you have trust issues?

Yes

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

My morning coffee and jumping into my bed in the evening with my bubble lights on :3

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

Uhm.... everything?

26. What do you do when you wake up?

If it’s school day I get out of bed immediately, if it’s not I check my social media, read fanfictions or just nap some more

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

I’m pretty fine with my skin

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

Myself. And my best friends

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

I don’t have ex, I have no-one

30. Do you ever want to get married?

This is complicated. I do but I know I won’t

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

Yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Oh! Benny Batch and Misha Collins! Or Emeraude Toubia and Rose Leslie

33. Spell your name with your chin.

JMju,l,kaz (well, it’s Julka XD)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

I like going to the gym, ice skating and swimming

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

I hate TV so yeah

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

I have and I currently do

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

I never talk first in those situations

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

My type, so dark hair and dark/blue eyes, tall, sweet and gentle, trustworthy, maybe likes tv shows as much as I do

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

Shops with food and make-up

40. What do you want to do after high school?

I’d like to be a psychologist

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Not everyone

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

That my depression strikes again

43. Do you smile at strangers?

Very rarely

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Bottom of the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

During the week compulsion to go to school, during the weekend... My mum. I’d stay there for the whole day if she didn’t

46. What are you paranoid about?

Spiders, strangers, loneliness

47. Have you ever been high?

No

48. Have you ever been drunk?

Kind of

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

Yes

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Multiple times

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

Oh, everything

53. Favourite makeup brand?

Rimmel, Golden Rose, Wibo

54. Favourite store?

I don’t have one

55. Favourite blog?

I like the ones I follow

56. Favourite colour?

Black

57. Favourite food? 

Sweets and chips (like Lays chips), peanut butter

58. Last thing you ate?

A sandwich with peanut butter

59. First thing you ate this morning?

A sandwich with Nutella

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

Yes, for... recitation? A long time ago tho

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Never

62. Been arrested? For what?

Never

63. Ever been in love? 

Yes, twice... no. Thrice.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

There wasn’t any

65. Are you hungry right now?

Nah, I’ve just ate

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

Nope

67. Facebook or Twitter?

Facebook

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

No

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

Justyna and Agata

71. Craving something? What?

*humming* Find me... somebody to love...

72. What colour are your towels?

Blue, pink, white

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

Two plus my white bear

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

Yes

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

I’m sure I have 2

75. Favourite animal?

A wolf and a puppy

76. What colour is your underwear?

White

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

Chocolate

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Grey

80. What colour pants?

Dark blue

81. Favourite tv show?

Sherlock, Supernatural, Shadowhunters, Game of Thrones

82. Favourite movie?

1000 words, Pitch Perfect, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Never saw

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Never saw

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

Didn’t see that movie

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Dory

87. First person you talked to today?

My mum

88. Last person you talked to today?

Also my mum

89. Name a person you hate?

I don’t hate people but with Steven Moffat I’m close

90. Name a person you love?

No, not gonna do this

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

M O F F T I S S (Moffat stronger, Gatiss is too cute to destroy his sweet face)

92. In a fight with someone?

No

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

10?

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

Many, like 15 maybe or even more

95. Last movie you watched?

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

96. Favourite actress?

Emeraude Toubia, Rose Leslie, Amanda Abbington

97. Favourite actor?

Oh God... Benedict Comberbatch, Martin Freeman, Mark Gatiss, Jensen Ackles, Misha Collins, Jared Padalecki, Stephen Amell, Grant Gustin, Kit Harington, Richard Madden, Robert Downey Jr, Matt Daddario, Harry Shum Jr

98. Do you tan a lot?

Kind of

99. Have any pets?

No, sadly :(

100. How are you feeling?

Like shit

101. Do you type fast?

Very fast, but I make mistakes while I’m on my phone

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

Do you want me to make a list? Give me... a year

103. Can you spell well?

 Yes, very

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

I miss my first internet friend and my second crush

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Sure

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

No!

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Yes, I have

108. What should you be doing?

Getting my shit together

109. Is something irritating you right now?

The whole radio silence from Sherlock’s crew, the fact I have to read 650 pages book and... yeah.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

Yup

111. Writing or drawing?

Both, totally, but I write more

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

I don’t cry in front of people

113. What was your childhood nickname?

Julson. My internet friend used to call me like that

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

No

116. Are you listening to music right now?

No :/

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

Yasss

118. Do you like Chinese food?

If it’s without those black mushrooms

119. Favourite book?

I have so many... I love John Green tho

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

Not at all

121. Are you mean?

Rarely, but I always try to be nice

122. Is cheating ever okay?

NO! Cheating is NEVER okay

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Hell no

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Yes

125. Do you believe in true love?

Yes, but not in my case. I mean others? Yea, true love exist. But not in my life

126. Are you currently bored?

Who am I, Sherlock? :D

127. What makes you happy?

Lack of troubles, music, good tv show, nice fanfictions, food

128. Would you change your name?

Maybe, I’m not a big fan of mine

129. What your zodiac sign?

Aries

130. Do you like subway?

There’s no in my city, sadly

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Ooooh, man, been there done that. We’re not friends anymore (his fault)

132. LGBTQ+ right supporter?

YES, YES, YES, YESSSSSSSSSS

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

“Something lately drives me crazy Has to do with how you make me Struggle to get your attention Calling you brings apprehension Texts from you and sex from you Are things that are not so uncommon Flirt with you you're all about it Tell me why I feel unwanted?“

“Super Psycho Love” Simon Curtis

134. Can you count to one million?

Sure

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

Out of context but “I didn’t see” (well, I did and that person knew that, I can’t come up with anything better now)

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed, I hate open doors

137. How tall are you?

5′8 like Robert Downey Jr <3

138. Curly or Straight hair?

I love curls <3

139. Brunette or Blonde?

Dark hair, always

140. Summer or Winter?

Summer

141. Night or Day?

Night

142. Favourite month?

December, because Christmas

143. Are you a vegetarian?

Nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

Dark

145. Tea or Coffee?

Coffee, I hate tea

146. Was today a good day?

Not really, I feel like shit

147. Mars or Snickers?

Mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“Remember there’s a light and it never goes out”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

I watch Supernatural, well... :D

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it somewhere, what’s the first line

“I have some interesting papers here, Watson - said my friend, Sherlock Holmes, when one day we were sitting at the fireplace - and I really think it’s worth for you to check them”

[pwesident]

dO ALL OF THEM

u make me suffer (I’m kidding thank u I love doing these)

SEND ME NUMBERS

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

@omgitsthatgingergirl !!!

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

yes

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

@omgitsthatgingergirl !!!!!

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i wanna say yes??

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i don’t drink but i hope so?? yeah

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

this has always been a weird question for me like.. simply put & getting rid of details it could be anyone we just have to click you get me? but i want us to be similar enough so we have things to enjoy together and talk abt but not so different for it to be boring, which is why I’m beyond happy rn!!!

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

hell the fuck yeah

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

@omgitsthatgingergirl

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

nope not at all lmao

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

my friend Melanie!! or my friend Jake. One Of The Two

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Here we goooo”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

OH GOD 

Dragula by Rob Zombie

Redbone by Childish Gambino

Everyday Robots by David Albarn

Lonely Press Play by David Albarn

From The Sun by Unknown Mortal Orchestra

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

g o d y e s

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

YEA

15. What good thing happened this summer?

nothing this past summer sucked for the most part it was just one big Depression Session

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

im dating her so yes

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

would be lame if there wasnt 

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

yea!! she’s one of my best friends now

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i don’t take baths i love me a good shower tho

20. Do you like your neighbors?

half of them

21. What are your bad habits?

i procrastinate like a motherfucker & i sleep in too much & i never go out unless i either really really want to or am forced to & i forget to eat

22. Where would you like to travel?

anywhere the water is clear

23. Do you have trust issues?

YEAH THE WORST LMFAO

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

sleeping

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

yes

26. What do you do when you wake up?

keep my eyes closed and hope i fall back asleep or i take a drink of whatever drink I have on my nightstand

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

im like a ghost so i wouldn’t mind a tan or smth but otherwise I’m happy

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

friend & family & my amazing gf

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

no

30. Do you ever want to get married?

yes but in this economy it isn’t presently feasible (the second half is a joke yes i do one day want to)

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

not right now!

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

none gross

33. Spell your name with your chin.

 hicj (nick)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

None but i like hockey!

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

tv goodbye

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

mmmmyes

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

nothing or “"someone please talk” if it’s bad enough

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

@omgitsthatgingergirl

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

i can’t shop im an impulse buyer

40. What do you want to do after high school?

be a psychologist!! i wanna help people a lot

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

depends on what you did.

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

probably either pissed right the fuck off or im zoned waaaaay out

43. Do you smile at strangers?

yeah!! spread that positivity

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

space

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

liquids, a need to use the bathroom, food, i have things to do, and i wanna text @omgitsthatgingergirl

46. What are you paranoid about?

all of my relationships and friendships are fake it’s all one big elaborate prank

47. Have you ever been high?

ish?? some concerts I go to have weed in high volume n the smell kinda gets to me and i get sleepy as fuck

48. Have you ever been drunk?

nope!!!!!! miss me with that fuck shit

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

no wtf

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

black

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

…yeah… BUT NOT RECENTLY LEGGOO

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

yes

53. Favourite makeup brand?

i don’t use it but i prob could/should

54. Favourite store?

…five below

55. Favourite blog?

SO MANY

56. Favourite colour?

SO MANY!!!

57. Favourite food?

SO MSANY OH GOD

58. Last thing you ate?

Chinese food

59. First thing you ate this morning?

…Gatorade 

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

no im lame as fuck

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

nope im a Good Child

62. Been arrested? For what?

IM A GOOD CHILD

63. Ever been in love?

yeah i am right now what’s up ask me anything

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

junior homecoming. 

65. Are you hungry right now?

…i just ate but I could eat more

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

yeAH

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter tbh

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr?? i guess

69. Are you watching tv right now?

no

70. Names of your bestfriends?

Angela ( @omgitsthatgingergirl follow my gf she’s amazing), SHOUT OUT TO LETITTY ( @tattami ), Melanie, Dennis, Abigail, Tiphanny ( @t-kristen go follow them!!), Nick, Victor/Vogner, Megan ( @lapisslazupee a quality meme), and a whole lot of others!!!

71. Craving something? What?

yes my gf to be near me so i can hug her and we can chill and sleep

72. What colour are your towels?

they change colors a lot there’s white and purple and blue and more

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

…four or five-

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

one rn his name is O’Shaugnessey 

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

S o m a n y

75. Favourite animal?

so many but wolves have a special place in my heart

76. What colour is your underwear?

currently it’s grey

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

yes

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

probably phish food

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

dark blue!

80. What colour pants?

they’re plaid i think?? w red and black they’re sleep pants and im comfortable as FUCK

81. Favourite tv show?

SCRUBS

82. Favourite movie?

… Moana? rn yeah 

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

first one

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

either

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

yes

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

im nemo 

87. First person you talked to today?

my friend jake 

88. Last person you talked to today?

couldn’t say still tkkkng to people

89. Name a person you hate?

a lot…

90. Name a person you love?

ANGELA!!!!!

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

YEA LMAO

92. In a fight with someone?

ish?? they’re just being… rude rn

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

i dunno like maybe two

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

at least 5

95. Last movie you watched?

Jurassic World

96. Favourite actress?

so many

97. Favourite actor?

EZRA MILLER !!!! LOVE THAT BOY

98. Do you tan a lot?

sometimes?

99. Have any pets?

three fat cats!

100. How are you feeling?

bueno 

101. Do you type fast?

fairly fast compared to my friends

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

the entirety 

103. Can you spell well?

as a writer (a shitty one), yes

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

a few

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

yeah? kinda

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

dunno tbqh

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

no!

108. What should you be doing?

sleeping, probably

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yeah lmfao

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

YEAH

111. Do you have trust issues?

you asked this (yes big ones)

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

Angela

113. What was your childhood nickname?

nicky… if you call me that you’re dead to be tbqh like you’ve gotta be Real Close to call me that

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

mhm!

115. Do you play the Wii?

not for years but catch me at the resort

116. Are you listening to music right now?

not rn but i usually am

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

mhm!

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yeah but not much

119. Favourite book?

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern (fucking read it it’s amazing)

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yeah sometimes!

121. Are you mean?

i motherfuckin can be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

HELL THE FUCK NO WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THIS

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

who buys white shoes these days i don't 

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

yeah!

125. Do you believe in true love?

mhm

126. Are you currently bored?

a bit?

127. What makes you happy?

a lot of stuff

128. Would you change your name?

I’ve always liked the name Alex ngl but i probs change my last name i don’t want to be linked to my father more than I have to be

129. What your zodiac sign?

Cancer!

130. Do you like subway?

never been (not big on sandwiches)

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

knowing me, prob like them back

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you asked this it’s my friend Melanie

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

check my blog title tbqh i change it to what I like most at the time

134. Can you count to one million?

 never tried but I probably could?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

i don’t know but i know it was the dumbest shit

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed 

137. How tall are you?

6′1″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

yes

139. Brunette or Blonde?

yes

140. Summer or Winter?

a cool summer or winter so the answer is yes

141. Night or Day?

NIGHT

142. Favourite month?

i love december honestly 

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

yes?

145. Tea or Coffee?

hot chocolate 

146. Was today a good day?

yeah!!!!!

147. Mars or Snickers?

neither thanks

148. What’s your favourite quote?

there’s a lot 

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yes

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“Trembling, I pulled myself from the shaft and tried to dust off.” - Virals, by Kathy Reichs. Great series, which I do recommend!

[selcouth-eunoia]

The end

Dear Misho, 

it’s me. Believe it or not. Want it or not. I’m writing to you in order to release the thoughts of mine forever and always. Get them, keep them and as you leave again - take them with you. I need to live. 

May 1st 2019. The last time I talked to you. Yet over that year behind us, you kept crushing me all the time. I’m not here to tell you how much I love you and that I want you back. I’m here to let go the past and leave. As you did. 

On 26th April, few days before we talked at last, my mom and my brothers had a serious life-threatening car crash. They are alive. But I went through so much since then. My mom had 4 OPs, my brother 2 and my little brother got away with a mild brain concussion. Since 28th February, we did not have a home. We lived here and there. The house was not ready and we had to move out from the apartment. So not only I had to switch from one hospital to other, not only I had finals at school, not only my dad and I had to sleep on the couch in my aunt’s apartment, but I started work. 

Summer came. Mom got better physically but mentally she was destroyed. So guess what - I became a psychologist. Mostly for myself because I could not help her - I only had a slight possibility to protect myself. And on top of all - you were gone. 

But fortunately, all these struggles are gone now. Mom even got her licence back the other day. Dad and I have a stronger bond since the problems around the car crash and the bad depressed and stressed situation in the summer right after the car crash. My aunt and my uncle are better now - we see each other every week as we used to. I concentrated on school and now I’m working on a project about rabies to present that in an organisation in Heidelberg - where I want to study medicine. 

Most importantly, while you were gone, I learned how to love myself. I haven’t lost all that weight yet, but I love myself the way I am right now. My face is not perfect but nobody’s is. I put a bit make up almost everyday, I workout and try to eat healthy even tho recently I developed binge eating disorder. But I’m recovering. I’ll be fine. 

I love myself for working on myself and for stopping with those depressive thoughts all the time. I try to be happy for no reason and I want my friends and family to be happy too. I found out my parents want to communicate with be but I never give them that chance. I found out that when someone loves himself it does not mean he cannot love anyone else - only then he can obtain enough happiness for himself and the rest of the world. I have a hard time at school and often I think that I won’t make it in medical school but that’s the point of MS - to be hard so you stick to it only if you really want to do it. 

Yes, I’m not writing this to only talk about me here. Back in the days, when I cried rivers for you, tried to find out why I’m annoying you all the time with reading messages but not responding on time or at all or when you made jokes I did not get and I got mad at you. Childish - that’s basically what it was. The real thing was my love to you. I loved you. 

I don’t think that I will forget you ever. I will always remember our digital love story. Or how all these almost 3 years, we never managed to hug in the summer. You disappearing happened to be always in the summer. Chen, Gabcho, your ex, the chinese girl you slept with and God knows whoever else is involved our love story. 

I would like to thank you for saying that girls like Chen are your type when we were at the beginning of our relationship (yes, it wa a relationship to me, idk about you). When you said you are thinking of Gabcho, when you preffered the company of an asian beauty instead of meeting me. When you were holding the hand of a girl less annoying than me instead of texting me. Thank you for causing that pain. Without it, I would not have found myself nowadays.

Thank you for dissapearing multiple times. Thank you for showing mixed signs. Thank you for not truly loving me. Thank you for your harsh and painful words. Thank you for givin up right the way, Thank you for listening when it hurt (when YOU hurt (me)). 

It was painful. Oh God, it was so painful. Loving someone you cannot hold, someone you cannot see, someone you cannot really take care of, someone you cannot kiss wherere it hurts him, hug whenever he’s hurt. Somone you cannot watch an anime with (it’s not that it was a problem for us back then - we’ve done that). Someone you want to spend your life with but haven’t seen for longer than 2 hours. I was jealous of your parents - not only friends or classmates of yours. Not to mention any passing by girl that had the chance to see you. I had an album with over 80 videos and photos of you. I deletet it. All the elements are now somewhere in my 5 year old google photo account. But somehow I clicked on favourite photos few weeks ago and found your pic. And I found other pictures of your graduation I hadn’t saved. I will delete them someday. I’m still in the process of letting you go. I sometimes watch Efo’s streams on twitch just to get a touch from your area. 

I have to admit that I miss you. And that I don’t hate you. But I’m indeed not sure if I still love you. And If I see you someday and have the chance to talk to you - I don’t know what to tell you. 

I have found many mental issues of mine when I was overthinking on what happened with us one year ago or better said - why it did not work between us. 

You never asked about my childhood and I’m glad about that. But I want to release it all so here you go: 

My mom and dad were separated when I was born because my dad always got late and sometimes did not even get home after work. My mom left and went to live with her sister and her husband, my grandma and Presko in Dobrich. She had to go to 3 work places because she did not have money to even buy me a gum. There was a period of time when my mom and I lived with a man named Alexander with his son. He was abusive. I remember when he pulled her in the air holding on her neck. When I was 3 years old, I met my dad and his sisters - I don’t remember these days. I remember playing every day with Presko. Then I remember how my aunt sent me to my grandma in Montana where she got remarried. I had a good time there too. Dad came to see me once again because he wanted to take me with him and go to Cyprus where my mom went after leaving me in Dobrich. I disagreed. But on that day I heard them both fighting about me. My aunt said she does not want me back and my grandma said she can’t take care of myself anymore. I felt guilty. She was tired because of me. So I agreed to go with him. He seemed very lively but at the same time so dark and fake. He showed a very scary part of him and whenever I did something wrong - he showed that dak side. Before that, mom tried to take me in Cyprus with her once but whenever she left me in any kindergarden, I started panicking that she will be gone for a long time once again. A place with strangers not even speaking my language - scary. 

Him and I left but this time we went to Balchik - to meet my other grandma and my aunts. And then his dark side came out. He started beating me. Pictures I don’t want to share. 

My mom came back then and I was still scared she will leave me with him again. It was like hell to me. But soon enough he started beating me in front of her. Sometimes she stood behind me but often she stayed still. There are situations my mom does not even know about. 

I started gaining weight. From a kid with good physical strength because my grandma used to feed me food and let me play a lot outside, I went to a distracted kid that was actually really good at school but was blamed for not being the perfect one. 

Soon enough my brother was born and I was so happy. Even tho so jealous that my mom is not looking at me the way she looked at him. I became the black sheep. 

The we went to Cyprus where I turned 9 and even today nobody wants to admit my skills in learning. I learned greek fast and almost alone, I kept up with the stuff at school even tho we did not do anything new than what I had done in Bulgaria. My dad kept beating me, even started calling me bad names. I constantly kept gaining weight. But fortunately, my physics worked for me - I was tall enough for my age and the weight I was gaining at some point started disappearing. 

Then I went to a bulgarian school at the same time. And the bullying stared. They kicked me, called me names, insulted me, spread lies about me. And then my mom found lice in my hair and since we were poor, we did not have money to buy something to kill them, she had to cut my hair short. The bullying spread in the greek school as well. I barely had friends. No one liked me, my dad was violent, my mom never protected me, I had to do a lot of her household chores, took care of my brothers and never had the chance to play with the kids. I had to study. Books. To translate them. And do chores. And look after my brother. This was the life of a kid between 10 and 12. 

Over the years, things were getting even worse finantially, all my clothes were either given by someone or we found them somewhere. We did not have a proper washing mashine, it was so hot that my parents even slept outside, cockroaches everywhere, mosquios eating us. And my little brother was born so money was missing. 

My mom decided to take my brothers and leave them at one of my dad’s sisters to take care of them and to go to Germany and start a life there so we can go there and start over. So I had to stay with my dad. He was surprisingly less violent. But something else happened... He went sexual. Another situation I don’t want to talk about. 

We managed to leave Cyprus and get back to Bulgaria. While my mom was getting things straight in Germany, my dad, my brothers and I stayed at my aunt. I missed school a lot. I just found friends, kids at school just had started accepting me, bullying started slowly disappearing. And in Bulgaria, dad became violent again. He even started calling me really bad words, blaming me for things that were happening. I was like an absorbend rag. I started hating him, started hating the bullies in Cyprus. I was 12 years old and I carried so much hate and hatred... I was listening to what they used to call me all these years and I hated myself even. I started living in the world of animations, games. It was my comfort. I hated every gilry girl, every potentional bully. I basically did not know how to socialize. 

Dad went to Germany where mom finally found us a place. And it was a wonderful time... My aunt, my uncle and my brothers. Peace. I leanred so much from them, I helped at home too and it was wonderful. But then dad came to pick us up. I did not want to go to no Germany, i did not want to meet no new class mates either learn another language. My stubborn side was gaining strengh. I became an actual tom boy. And guess what - germans were not less bullies than greeks. It even got worse. They used to put things in my bag, called me names, made fun of me. I probably hated myself more than I hated them. Because my acne, my strange hair and weirth oversized clothes were the truth. So instead of working on myself, listening to what they don’t liek and turning into what they want me to be - I concentrated on hating them. Even when a girl came to our class and we became friends. Even if she showed me how to talk to people, how to start looking after myself a bit. It was just not the right time to fully love myself. 

When I was 14, I met that guy I had pseudo sex with. He was my true love. When we were apart, I felt empty. But he was just not my guy. I started looking after myself slowly. I wanted to be fit, so I managed to keep my weight in the healthy zone. And one year later I met you. 

From that point you know what happened. No need to say a thing else. Now you at least know why I was so insecure, why I wanted you to be always there, why I was scared to lose you and why I was always offended and felt attacked. 

These are not excuses. These are the reasons why I was like that. The most important part is - I managed to develop a better self of mine. I accepted my face, my body and what I’m doing now is trying to feel BETTER, not good. Because I already feel good. 

If one day we meet again, I would like to at least have a taste of what we could have been if we have had the chance to be an actual couple. I really want to. 

But I guess there is already someone who has taken that part of your life. So I’m wishing you good luck and lots of love. You deserve it. 

Kind regards, 

Dahling. 

[mcdouglecompany-blog]

Dr. James Dobson and Dr. John Rosemond. God's Wisdom for Raising Children and 3 Prager University Videos.

Dr. James Dobson and Dr. John Rosemond. God's Wisdom for Raising Children and 3 Prager University Videos.

  God's Wisdom for Raising Children. Dr. James Dobson and Dr. John Rosemond. Parts 1 and 2.

How to Get Kids to Listen

Is Your Child Getting Enough Vitamin N?

What Did Your Parents Most Want You to Be?

  God's Wisdom for Raising Children - Part 1 with Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk.

https://youtu.be/RSBoDVzPmHA

Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk

Dr. James Dobson welcomes guest and fellow psychologist, Dr. John Rosemond. They explain how postmodern thinking has influenced child-rearing over the past several decades. The result is ineffective parenting and stressed-out moms and dads. In their discussion, focused on Rosemond's book Parenting by the Book, they talk about the need for Christian parents to return to a biblical method for raising and disciplining kids that both instills respect and inspires obedience. ----- Parenting by The Book by John Rosemond: https://www.christianbook.com/parenti... John Rosemond Website: https://www.rosemond.com/ ----- Visit Our Website: http://www.drjamesdobson.org Find Us On Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrJamesDobso... Follow Us On Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrJamesDobsonFT Follow Us On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjamesdobs...

    God's Wisdom for Raising Children - Part 2 with Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk.

https://youtu.be/R0bDtbMHv7A

Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk

Many men and women get caught up in the mainstream parenting methods, instead of raising their kids on the principles found in God’s Word. Dr. Dobson and Dr. John Rosemond explain why couples should embrace parental authority, the importance in fighting for the hearts and minds of their kids, and why a biblical approach to childrearing is the most effective method. ----- Parenting by The Book by John Rosemond: https://www.christianbook.com/parenti... John Rosemond Website: https://www.rosemond.com/ ----- Visit Our Website: http://www.drjamesdobson.org Find Us On Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrJamesDobso... Follow Us On Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrJamesDobsonFT Follow Us On Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjamesdobs...

    How to Get Kids to Listen

https://youtu.be/_toRV6ziOYg

PragerU

Why is it so hard for so many parents and teachers to get kids to do as they are told? Because too many adults have followed some very bad advice. Family psychologist John Rosemond offers some useful tips on how to get the little barbarians to listen.

Script: When was the last time you heard a child referred to as obedient? It’s probably been a while. That’s too bad because the best research tells us that obedient children are happy children. And, from my experience as a family psychologist, the parents of obedient children are happy parents. Since all parents want their children to be happy, the question becomes: How does one get a child to obey? Is there some trick to it? Well, there are certainly are a lot of parents who think so. They believe that proper discipline is a matter of using the right methods, techniques, and strategies: what I call consequence delivery systems. Parents have been using these behavior-modification-based methods since they became popular in the 1960s – seemingly to no avail. Would anyone argue that today’s kids are more obedient than kids were several generations ago? I don’t think so. The reason these methods and techniques don’t work is that proper discipline is not a matter of proper methods. It’s a matter of a proper attitude on the part of the parent. Let me illustrate the point. Let’s say that for a week I observe the classroom of a grade school teacher who has the reputation of being the best disciplinarian in her district. She consistently has fewer behavior problems than any of her colleagues. What is she doing? She’s making her expectations perfectly clear. Which means, first, she communicates in simple, declarative sentences. She doesn’t use fifty words when she could use ten. The more words you use to communicate your expectations, the less confident you sound. Second, she prefaces her instructions to her students with authoritative phrases like “I want you to…” and “It’s time for you to…” She says, “It’s time for you to take out your math books and turn to page 25” as opposed to “Let’s take out our math books and turn to page 25. Okay?” Third, this teacher does not explain the motives behind her instructions to her students. Why? Because she knows that explanations invite arguments. Whenever parents tell me they’re dealing with an argumentative child I know that these well-intentioned people are explaining themselves. They tell their child why they want him to pick up his toys, for example. And he argues, because you can always pick apart an explanation. If you don’t explain yourself when you give an instruction to a child, then the child, being a child, is almost surely going to ask for one. He’s going to ask Why? or Why not? At which point… get ready for a big surprise… your answer should be “Because I said so.” For the complete script, visit https://www.prageru.com/videos/how-ge...

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    Is Your Child Getting Enough Vitamin N?

https://youtu.be/j3cgUhtRUbE

PragerU

If you're a parent, is your child getting enough Vitamin N? It may be the most important thing you can give them. But what exactly does Vitamin N do? Watch this video to find out.

Script: I want to tell you about an essential vitamin you’ve probably never heard of. If you’re a parent, or plan to be one, it might be more important to your child’s growth than all other vitamins combined. And only you, a parent, can provide it. I call it Vitamin N. The word “No.” More and more children, I find, are suffering from Vitamin N deficiency. And they, their parents, and our entire culture are paying the price. Let me illustrate my point with a story that’s quite typical. A father, I’ll call him Bill, gave his son, age five, pretty much everything the little boy asked for. Like most parents, Bill wanted more than anything for his son to be happy. But he wasn’t. Instead he was petulant, moody, and often sullen. He was also having problems getting along with other children. In addition, he was very demanding and rarely if ever expressed any appreciation, let alone gratitude, for all the things Bill and his wife were giving him. Was his son depressed, Bill wanted to know? Did he need therapy? His son, I told him, was suffering the predictable ill effects of being over-indulged. What he needed was a healthy and steady dose of Vitamin N. Over-indulgence–a deficiency of Vitamin N—leads to its own form of addiction. When the point of diminishing returns is passed (and it’s passed fairly early on), the receiving of things begins to generate nothing but want for more things. One terrible effect of this is that our children are becoming accustomed to a material standard that’s out of kilter with what they can ever hope to achieve as adults. Consider also that many, if not most, children attain this level of affluence not by working, sacrificing, or doing their best, but by whining, demanding, and manipulating. So in the process of inflating their material expectations, we also teach children that something can be had for next to nothing. Not only is that a falsehood, it’s also one of the most dangerous, destructive attitudes a person can acquire. This may go a long way toward explaining why the mental health of children in the 1950s – when kids got a lot less -- was significantly better than the mental health of today’s kids. Since the ‘50s, and especially in the last few decades, as indulgence has become the parenting norm, the rates of child and teen depression have skyrocketed. Children who grow up believing in the something-for-nothing fairy tale are likely to become emotionally stunted, self-centered adults. Then, when they themselves become parents, they’re likely to overdose their children with material things – the piles of toys, plushies, and gadgets one finds scattered around most households. In that way, over indulgence—a deficiency of Vitamin N—becomes an inherited disease, an addiction passed from one generation to the next. This also explains why children who get too much of what they want rarely take proper care of anything they have. Why should they? After all, experience tells them that more is always on the way. For the complete script, visit https://www.prageru.com/videos/your-c...

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    What Did Your Parents Most Want You to Be?

https://youtu.be/5adJxEWLFKU

PragerU

When parents boast about their children with other people, what do most say first? Is it how nice they are to strangers? Or how much volunteering they did last year? Usually not. More often, they talk about their good grades in school, or the prestigious college they went to, or the much sought after summer internship they are on. But this is backwards. Acts of kindness are what parents should talk about with others, and what they should really praise their kids for. According to Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, the best way to make a better world is to praise people for what counts--goodness.

Script: A lot of the things that are wrong with the world we can’t fix by ourselves. As much as we’d like to see peace brought to troubled areas, corrupt governments reformed, cancers cured, there’s a limited amount that any of us as individuals can do about such things. However, there is one thing that nearly all of us can do that will immediately and exponentially increase goodness and happiness on earth. Parents -- and all other adults -- should reserve their highest praise of children for when their children do kind acts. This is not the case at present. As a rule, children receive their highest compliments for one of four things: -- their intellectual and academic achievements “my son, Sean is brilliant! His teacher says he is the best student she has had in years.” -- their athletic abilities, -- their artistic attainments, -- and, in the case of girls, their looks. Children who receive their parents’ and other adults’ compliments in these areas are delighted; everyone loves compliments. But what about the child who doesn’t excel at academics, who isn’t a gifted athlete or dancer? Or the girl who is not particularly pretty? About what will their parents praise them? The most flattering remark such a child is likely to hear their parents tell others will be something like, “But he or she is a really good kid.” From which it can generally be inferred that being a good kid is not a big deal -- that, from the parent’s perspective, the child is probably not very good at anything worth talking about. Some parents to whom I’ve made this proposal have told me it’s unnecessary; they’re certain that they’ve successfully communicated to their children that being a good person is what really matters most to them. By in large, these parents are deluding themselves and there is a way for parents to find out if this is so. For many years, Dennis Prager has suggested that parents ask their children: What do you think that I, your mother, or I, your father, want you to be: Successful, smart, good, or happy? Many parents who have conducted this experiment have been quite surprised to learn that their children did not think that being good was what mattered most to their parents. Try it yourself. Ask your child of any age that question: What do you think I most want you to be? I want to make clear that I am not suggesting that parents stop complimenting their children for their accomplishments in other areas. All children want to know that their parents have respect for their accomplishments. And girls, even more than boys, also need to feel that they’re physically attractive. But -- and this is an important but -- what I am suggesting is this: the traits that we most often emphasize and praise are all important only if being a good person is placed at the top of the list. For the complete script, visit https://www.prageru.com/videos/what-d...

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  The Rational Bible: Exodus by Dennis Prager  

NATIONAL BESTSELLER "Dennis Prager has put together one of the most stunning commentaries in modern times on the most profound document in human history. It's a must-read that every person, religious and non-religious, should buy and peruse every night before bed. It'll make you think harder, pray more ardently, and understand your civilization better." — Ben Shapiro, host of "The Ben Shapiro Show" "Dennis Prager’s commentary on Exodus will rank among the greatest modern Torah commentaries. That is how important I think it is. And I am clearly not alone... It might well be on its way to becoming the most widely read Torah commentary of our time—and by non-Jews as well as by Jews." — Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, bestselling author of Jewish Literacy Why do so many people think the Bible, the most influential book in world history, is outdated? Why do our friends and neighbors – and sometimes we ourselves – dismiss the Bible as irrelevant, irrational, immoral, or all of these things? This explanation of the Book of Exodus, the second book of the Bible, will demonstrate that the Bible is not only powerfully relevant to today’s issues, but completely consistent with rational thought. Do you think the Bible permitted the trans-Atlantic slave trade? You won’t after reading this book. Do you struggle to love your parents? If you do, you need this book. Do you doubt the existence of God because belief in God is “irrational?” This book will give you reason after reason to rethink your doubts. The title of this commentary is, “The Rational Bible” because its approach is entirely reason-based. The reader is never asked to accept anything on faith alone. As Prager says, “If something I write does not make rational sense, I have not done my job.” The Rational Bible is the fruit of Dennis Prager’s forty years of teaching the Bible to people of every faith, and no faith. On virtually every page, you will discover how the text relates to the contemporary world and to your life. His goal: to change your mind – and then change your life.

  Highly Recommended by ACU.

Purchase his book at-

https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Bible-Exodus-Dennis-Prager/dp/1621577724

    The Rational Bible: Genesis by Dennis Prager 

USA Today bestseller Publishers Weekly bestseller Wall Street Journal bestseller Many people today think the Bible, the most influential book in world history, is not only outdated but irrelevant, irrational, and even immoral. This explanation of the Book of Genesis, the first book of the Bible, demonstrates clearly and powerfully that the opposite is true. The Bible remains profoundly relevant—both to the great issues of our day and to each individual life. It is the greatest moral guide and source of wisdom ever written. Do you doubt the existence of God because you think believing in God is irrational? This book will give you many reasons to rethink your doubts. Do you think faith and science are in conflict? You won’t after reading this commentary on Genesis. Do you come from a dysfunctional family? It may comfort you to know that every family discussed in Genesis was highly dysfunctional! The title of this commentary is “The Rational Bible” because its approach is entirely reason-based. The reader is never asked to accept anything on faith alone. In Dennis Prager’s words, “If something I write is not rational, I have not done my job.” The Rational Bible is the fruit of Dennis Prager’s forty years of teaching the Bible—whose Hebrew grammar and vocabulary he has mastered—to people of every faith and no faith at all. On virtually every page, you will discover how the text relates to the contemporary world in general and to you personally. His goal: to change your mind—and, as a result, to change your life.

  Highly Recommended by ACU.

Purchase his book at-

https://www.amazon.com/Rational-Bible-Genesis-Dennis-Prager/dp/1621578984

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