#i decided to finally try Tomb Raider

[link-of-asgard]

Ever bought a game everyone said was great and just ended up hating it?

[hamstermastersamster]

10 fandoms 10 characters!

Tagged by @talkingsoup <3

(Man I'm definitely not IN 10 fandoms so most of these are just Blorbos from my Shows/Books/Games)

April O'Neil from TMNT is very special to me. Just a normal gal swept up in absolute cartoon nonsense and accidentally adopting 4 idiot mutant turtle sons/little brothers and you know what, she's just Rolling With It. She's smart, warm, resilient and wholesome. I love her a whole lot. Check out my tmnt sideblog @hamsterandturtlesoup if you really want to know how much xD

Squall from Final Fantasy VIII is a definite son blorbo. As a kid, I naturally thought his icy edgelord emo personality and black leather get-up was simply cool, and when I replayed it again as an adult I was just "oh you poor thing you". He's a child soldier, lost his found-family but can't remember that so just has persistent feelings of abandonment and severe social avoidance, struggles to express emotion, has Friends forced upon him against his will and starts to Feel Things . . . Aaaa ;A; You get to choose certain responses in the game and I like to have him warm up slowly over time to his friends. That character progression is just so wholesome to see. I still have a significant FFVIII fanfic WIP that explores his character development floating around . . . maybe someday I'll finish it x'D

Rung from Transformers MTMTE is a prime of example of me falliing in love with 'minor' characters who then go on to have the shittiest time ever. At this point I'm fairly sure I do this TO them by warping reality when I decide I like them a lot. But I love it when characters I love suffer, so >_>; Rung is just a soft caring psychologist without flashy function or alt mode or combat capability! LEAVE HIM ALOOOOONE-

Lara Croft from Tomb Raider - no, not the modern reboot that gave her extreme daddy issues, or the reboot before THAT that gave her mommy issues and unnecessary friends calling her in the middle of isolated ruin exploration and worries about the blood on her hands. NO, I'm talking about the OG ruthless queen trapped in an aristocratic life who lost her fiance and old life in a plane crash that only she survived, but found herself in that survival and was effectively reborn. Her family cut ties with her and she simply said 'fine, fuck off' and worked alone for the thrill of it and made her own fortune and killed what she had to with a smile. She avoided any kind of love interest until Angel of Darkness and even then it was implicit enough to be completely ignored. She was a fucking badass. Child!hamster wanted to be her. Stripping away the visual and marketing sexualisation of her, she was such an important piece of feminist history in video games. I took archaeology at AS level because of her lmao.

Thalric from the Shadows of the Apt book series (just kidding lol, SotA doesn't have a visible fandom! I AM THE FANDOM-). SotA is a really unique and interesting insect-based fantasy world that I will sing praises for forever. I could talk about a bunch of characters in it <3 However, Thalric is, bluntly, a complicated Wasp villain who has done a lot of Bad Things but starts to feel conflicted over the shitty stuff his empire is doing and making him do. His full conversion to Sort-Of-Good-Guy happens over a looong time and is one of my favourite moral turnabouts I've ever seen. He's just so interesting as an example of a soldier brainwashed by his toxic state and trying to undo that, and at various points you really feel for him even though he's done absolutely terrible things. Only a great writer and compelling character can pull that off.

Raz from Psychonauts is a special little boy and only the first psychic on my list! :D What is not to love about a little psychic boy raised in a circus cursed to die in water with the gumption to sneak into a summer camp for psychic kids. His design, his voice acting, his character writing are just so good and I want to protect him ;A; When Psychonauts 2 unravelled the truth of his family history it just about murdered me in my seat. Since he actually gets recruited, does that make him another child soldier? . . . 2 on my list so far xD

Steven from Steven Universe is just a good soft kind boy with trauma. You know I love a good soft kind boy with trauma. (He also fights in a war, technically? Child soldier number 3!)

Lessa from the Dragonriders of Pern book series is a tiny undernourished woman filled with raw psychic power, vengeance, pride and spite and I respect that. She avoids the massacre of her entire family by pretending to be a filthy servant for a decade, and then manipulates the invading murderer into a duel to the death with a dragonrider whom she also manipulates so that she can reclaim her ancestral home, but instead decides to go one better and become the forerunning Queen dragonrider, so basically rules the world instead for her lifetime. She is a queen from all angles.

Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist is I guess child soldier no 4! What can I say, he's just a spirited, talented idiot boy wrapped up in tragedy and disability and angst. This is, of course, everything I could hope for in a character because suffering is delicious to me. But suffering with a happy ending is even better, and I love FMA's ending for him :3

Samuel Vimes from Discworld is one of my favourite characters ever. He's so flawed, but with a hellish bent for justice and a heart of gold, and I just love seeing things through his eyes? A compelling character with his own layers of angst and tragedy who has always felt very real to me. RIP pterry you are always missed.

Most of these are boys, my god. Too many beautiful (pathetic loser) boys. I have a weakness. Clearly I need to open my heart to more pathetic women in media.

Tagging . . . everyone xD I have a personal rule of not tagging individuals in these things as I don't want to pressure anyone! But go for it if you feel the inclination, I would love to read your takes and blorbos :3

[adultswim2021]

The Venture Bros. #38: “The Lepidopterists” | August 3, 2008 - 11:30PM | S03E10

Well, it only took 8 episodes, but we’ve got our first just good-ass Venture Bros of the season. I forgot about this one being GREAT. There ain’t no hide nor hair of Hank, Dean, or Scooter Venture (is it Scooter? The dad? I forget his name all of the sudden and don’t feel like looking it up. Could it be Peanut?). This one was teased in the “Now Museum, Now You Don’t” episode. Doc Hammer wrote this episode and midway through the writing process Jackson told Doc that Spider-Skull Island was a museum now, in a different episode he was in the middle of writing. Lucky him, he got to write museum gags, like when 21 and 24 blend in at a museum tableau. 

The Monarch becomes Jonas Venture Jr.’s arch after the events of “Tears of a Sea Cow” (actually that one’s good I just decided). Throughout the course of their inaugural scuffle, Monarch uses weaponry, cunning, politics, and movie magic to get towards his ultimate goal of being able to terrorize the real Dr. Scooter Venture again (By Scooter I mean whatever that guy’s name is. I simply can not remember). The Monarch basically gets Jonas Jr. to attack him with enough severity that he would be within guild bylaws to avenge his loss by targeting his immediate family members, such as the hated Scooter Venture. Meanwhile we get Jonas Jr. trying to get the hang of being arched. 

The opening has a very memorable scene that involves the Venture Mech, Ventron, starting this one with a gosh dang bang. Ventron is piloted by Jonas Jr, Sally Impossible, the Sea Captain, and Ned, a parody of The Thing who’s just a childlike retarded man. Jonas Jr. is a very supportive parent to Ned, who nurtures Ned’s independence and choice-making so that he can, to quote Doc Hammer on the commentary, “be the best damn retard he can be”.

Doc uses the r-word cheekily on said commentary after sharing a story about his mother scolding him for using it on the show, spoken by the Monarch. Doc puts a similar exchange between Jonas Jr. and the Monarch, where the Monarch incredulously offers back that he’s a villain and of course he’d use bad words like “retard”. He joked that his mom won't listen to the commentary. I hope she doesn't read this blog.  

The Pirate guy has a side story where he gets addicted to tranquilizer darts. 21 and 24 have to go on some technical mission with a third guy, Henchman 1. 21 and 24 continue their meta thread about how they fancy themselves main characters of their life, and evade death. They mention Tomb Raider in this episode, specifically her dying animation when she drowns. Jackson and Doc initially bonded over Tomb Raider when they first met.

Henchman 1 is a squareheaded and competent, and voiced by Jackson Publick squeezing his throat like David Cross in Mr. Show when he does the black guy voice. You know what I’m talking about? Jackson Publick actually cites this in the Venture Bros art book (which I found a digital copy of; here’s hoping they reissue that thing with updated entries for the finale and final season). Henchman 1 doesn’t survive, as far as we know. 

This one moves so goddamn quick and is actually funny. They even manage to get into guild rigamarole, which I usually find fraught humor-wise, and not only make it interesting but make it an important weapon being wielded by the Monarch. Death to Scooter.

MAIL BAG

This was really a turning point for me with Tim and Eric. While they would still put out three or four fantastic high-concept or style parody episodes, the hitting average on the more standard sketch episode just completely tanks. You can make one or two great episodes out of each season compiling the best gags but the pickings are bone slim. Wish they just got cancelled and did more episodes of Nite Live instead lol.

I might be more charitable than that, but I basically agree. I used to rationalize it in my head that Tim & Eric simply grabbed an opportunity to generate a lot of stuff, and decided not to be precious with it, and just foolhardily started churning out stuff and lost steam. Like a somewhat noble failure?

I now realize that a likelier explanation is that Adult Swim ordered 30 episodes (seasons 2-4) and shortly switched over to HD, and the production budget was locked so Tim & Eric couldn't make the switch and were basically pressured into churning out their 30 as quickly as possible, just to grant it a slightly-longer shelf life before becoming completely obsolete. I guess I'll sort my feelings out when the season is done.

[electrhea]

One Of Us: III

☆ Vamp!Rhea x afab!Reader

★ Word Count: 955

Author's Note: Bar meeting, and Reader's ex is there. :3

TW: Decapitation of said ex.

____________________________________________________

A text pops up on my phone, and before long I’m calling the love of my life (platonically).

“You called?”

“Took you long enough. Where are you?” The sound of clinking glasses and faint 2000s rave music halfway drowns out her voice.

“Home, right now. When do you want me to be there?”

“I suggest you be on your way.”

“Way to be passive, Rhea.” I roll my eyes. “Let me put an outfit together first and I’ll be on my way.”

“Or…” she drifts off, accent thick and voice dripping with an oxytocin-flooding pitch, “you could come in nothing.”

All I let her hear is an exhale, especially since the last thing I need her to hear is a verbal—or rather, audible—sign of lustful desperation emanating from my vocal cords.

“You wish.” Is she drunk, or is this normal from her?

“Well either way, I need something from you.”

“That being?”

“I need you a tad bit tipsy, then I’ll tell you.”

“You’re lucky I’ve been a fan of yours for years.”

“That’s precisely why I trust you can handle this.”

“Pish-posh, let me get an outfit on; unless you want to hear fabric moving in the background.”

“I’d rather hear with my eyes.”

“Keep that up and I’ll blindfold you.”

She chuckles, then hangs up the call. Guys My Age by Hey Violet plays from a Bose speaker bluetoothed to my phone.

I put together an outfit consisting of: a black tank top, a black Hawk&Bull ‘Tomb Raider Lara Croft’ leather jacket, VICI burgundy faux leather shorts, black fishnets under the shorts and tank top, and black KysBloes knee-high boots.

I check myself out in the door-sized mirror in front of my bed before deciding to put my tongue piercing in and add DragonWeave red Empyrean Tear earrings and silver rings into the mix.

When I finally make my way inside I hear Rhea compliment my outfit from directly behind me, already sat on a barstool and awaiting my arrival like her dogs would be waiting for her at home.

I sit beside her and she orders an expensive champagne for the both of us—side eyeing the bartender while he walks away; and fuck, I know him.

He brings our champagne to us, and invites himself to sit directly across from me at the bar counter Rhea and I are sat at.

Why him?

Why me?

It’s the worst moments possible that exes get caught up in your business like you’re frenemies at worst.

Ugh.

“What brings you here of all places?” he asks me, and I want to punch his perverted face.

My lack of interest seems to trigger him, as it fucking should. This is why Guys My Age was playing earlier. He’s why.

“Not gonna talk, huh?” Rhea ends up triggered as well, and she stands from her barstool to retort.

“Just how oblivious is that moronic little brain of yours?”

“Excuse me?”

Rhea takes a few long sips of her champagne and slams the glass down onto the counter.

“Can’t you read her body language telling you to back off? Go find a stripper to piss off; and while you’re at it—you piss off!” She looks into his eyes with the kind of death stare a mother gives you when you make her mad.

“Someone’s feisty~” he won’t fucking quit.

“Caillette, before I kill you.”

“Can’t kill the staff, buff-goth-lady.

“Ya think so? Try me.”

He scoffs and tries to walk away, but Rhea catches up and thrusts a kick to his lower back. I watch him collapse to his knees on the floor in pain.

I bend over the counter to drag his stool over to whack him in the head and use the rusted metal legs to pry his head off—which I pick up and grind into the counter and throw at the bar’s little target for knife throwing.

Someone’ll flush the rest of him down into the sewage system.

Rhea and I reseat ourselves and drink in achievement; we clink our glasses before chugging the rest like shots of vodka.

“How did you—?” I start asking, but Rhea cuts me off.

“—know?”

I nod.

“Let’s say I have a…‘sixth sense’...” I nod slower this time, relying on taking her word for it. I spot a red flash of light in my peripheral and immediately perk up in the direction I see it go.

“She’s back.”

“Who’s back?” I gesture with a hard side-eye in the direction and she gets the memo. “Goddamnit.” Rhea stands up and walks over to the Voice but ends up pinned to a wall.

“Miss me, darling?” the Voice teases.

“What do you want?”

“I see you’re still keeping your victim around, and not in the form it’s supposed to be in by now.”

“And why should I care?”

“Because our kind doesn’t drag prey around for emotional connection; we fucking eat them.”

“Wrong. You eat them; and if you even think about touching my friend, I will become a cannibal from consuming your flesh.”

“Hmph,” the Voice chuckles. “So confident, aren’t you? Quit waiting around and do your fucking job, or—”

“Not if I’m here,” I intervene in protest. I’m so done with this shit.

“Oh, you’re ssso clever,” the Voice hisses in an altered tone, but I come up from behind and choke her hard enough to de- capitate her.

“Oh, don’t worry; I know.” I grin, watching its head fall to the floor. Meanwhile, Rhea claps celebratorily—all with a smile on her adorable face.

“We should probably get going,” she suggests.

“Yeah? Where to?”

“How ‘bout a hotel room?”

“I’ve got nowhere better to be.”

“Is that a yes?”

“You bet your pretty face it is,” I chuckle.

[Masterlist]

[just4jinx]

LMAOO that's actually insane 😭😭 like the audacity?? but i'm glad the edit turned out great!! stay strong for the remaining 3 ones.. </3

oh i get that, it's hard to focus when ur already tired :( so yeah, something chill sounds like the perfect move tbh definitely rest soon though!!

the 12th is SOON soon omg. and i'm good, i finally ate too. it wasn't really a full meal since i just had pandebono but like. i'd have that any day anytime no questions asked so i'm more than happy with it LOL but how are u?? i hope cramps aren't bothering u anymore <3

ill rest soon dont worry! <3 i was just server hopping on murder mystery trying to find friendly ppl to chill with n ended up getting stuck with a guy that kept calling me babygirl IN GAME CHAT for everyone and their dog to see all bc i hid with him one round. brother i do not want u. its like men just collectively decided to come together today just for me holy shit 😭😭 SICK OF THEM well and truly.

YEAHHH the days are going by so fast omg i just dont wanna be 23 LMFAOOO

i just had to search that up n it looks sooo good wtf ?? i need it <\3 im glad u still ate well!! u deserve it! and im doing okay, tiredness has just hit me so hard ngl.. i could pass out. and i havent had cramps all day YUPPP

in case i do pass out tho i hope tomb raider goes well for you and you rest so well tonight as u should <33

[maximuswolf]

How important is refresh rate?

How important is refresh rate? I am obviously not a huge gamer. Most of the games I play are games like Tomb Raider, Final Fantasy, basically something with an interesting storyline. On top of that I do some emulation. I always see people talking about wanting higher refresh rates, but this seems to be more important for ppl who play FPS games which I do not do much anymore. I am trying to decide between getting a Flow x13 laptop or the new PX13. I like the PX13 a lot, but it only has 60 hz refresh. I am starting to think that would be fine for the gaming that I do and the 165 hz refresh on the x13 is probably overkill for what I do. Submitted September 16, 2024 at 04:40PM by Jebusfreek666 https://ift.tt/dh20DXG via /r/gaming

[moviereviewsector]

The Killer’s Game (2024) Final Trailer - Dave Bautista, Sofia Boutella, ...

Joe is a killer with some romantic skills. Living a double life with girlfriend Mazie and working as a hitman in Europe.

This movie is based in Europe, mainly France. Some damsel in distress sequences in this movie evolving the lead characters.

Joe gets hit with a medical diagnosis and decides to put a hit on himself.

These actions scenes are short but remind me of "John Wick" movies. A lot of gory death scenes with other hitmen as Joe defends himself against an overwhelming force of hitmen trying to kill him.

"The Party Girls" are not realistic. I hate girl power movements in movies. Women should just be. Movies like "Tomb Raider" were so good because Lara Croft was just her. She wasn't gay or a misandrist or had to get back at men in some way.

Mazie accepts all Joe's flaws regardless of his lies by omission about what he does for a living. This movie is a romantic film to a degree about a damsel and a anti-hero in the end.

This movie was decent, so I will give this movie a decent six. I wouldn't recommend this movie for kids under 17.

[naughtygirl286]

Our Recent trip to Halifax

So yup we went on our weekend away this past weekend we left early Friday morning sadly I didn't take a pic at our usual gas stop reason being I was asleep lol I was up late Thursday night so I was napping on the drive up. So we got there around 10-10:30am I think so we went and had a lil bit to eat being we didn't have breakfast before leaving home after that we went and did a lil bit of looking around before checking into the hotel we didn't stay at the usual spot but somewhere new and different it was owned by the same company tho. It looked a bit shabby on the outside like the building needs some work but when we went in and up the the room the room was really nice! I would have to say I was impressed by it. We stayed in for a lil bit before heading back out and went and visited some friends and spent the evening over with them which ended a really nice Friday

So Saturday we went and did alot of looking around and some shopping and visited all the usual places apparently they are opening a Hot Topic in the Halifax Shopping center later on this month which will be cool We'll have to go in the next time we're there we also go in to the one when we go to Moncton also of course we went to Toys R Us but I made that a separate post and we went to GameStops and pretty much everywhere we did do some pick-ups but not to much being it was still somewhat after Easter some places still seemed a bit picked over. but we did have a great and fun Saturday morning/afternoon. As for supper we of course decided to try to go to the Casino to have the all you can eat buffet I was a bit apprehensive (I think would be a good word) about them being total dicks to me and throwing me out or attempt to throw me out for no real reason and I just didn't want the hassle! but we went to try it, we got dressed up kinda nice and found a great parking space and we went in I stuck extremely close to the person I was with I didn't want them to be out of my sight and vice versa so we go up to a security podium there. and showed our Membership card and… The security guard just waved us through!!

I was like shocked and kinda relieved to the point that once we got past the entrance way and actually on to the Casino floor I was like "We made it, past the the front desk with out any problems!!" and with that we went to the dinning area and got into the Buffet area now we did have an amazing meal I loved it so much and was totally stuffed afterwards but while there I did have an interesting exchange with one of the buffet workers which getting my food one of the workers noticed my green Tomb Raider necklace and he asks me if I was a fan of Tomb Raider? and I was like Yes! and then he asks if I was a fan of the movies or the games? and I of course say Both! Then he asks me a strange question "Have you played the other Tom Clancy Games?" and I give him a strange look and say "No..?" and he has a shocked look on his face and I say "Tomb Raider is not a Tom Clancy Game" and he reassures me that it is and I say "No, no its not" and walk away back to our table. so this kinda bugged me a bit the rest of the night and all the way home so when I got home I wanted to see what the hell he was talking about so I googled "tom clancy tomb raider" as I said Tomb Raider isn't a Tom Clancy IP it was a lil Mission thing in the Ghost Recon Breakpoint games its basically an Easter egg treasure hunt themed after the Tomb Raider franchise in celebration of the franchise's 25th anniversary. So it was a promotional thing no different then what they did in Final Fantasy Brave Exvius, Brawlhalla, Fortnite,ect.

So as we do when ever we leave Halifax we got to Costco. We bring our insulated bags with us cause we'll pick up some frozen foods and all kinds of stuff for the house. So we do our shopping and we get to the check out and the woman asks for the Membership card so I give it to her and she looks at the picture on the back and looks at me and says "this is not you" and I look at her kinda strangely I'm like "yeah I know, its them" (the person I'm with,the person behind me) and she tells me "I'm sorry you can't hand me someone else's Membership card" which I think is totally stupid the owner of the card is right there we're obviously there together so I'm like "are you you serious?" and she is like "Yes, So what would you like me to do?" and I'm like "I would like you to ring this stuff in, so we can pay for it and go" and she says "I'm sorry I can't do that its against store policy" and hands me the card back. So the person I'm with and I look at each other kinda dumbfounded being that this has never happened before and I hand them the card and then they hand it back to the woman at the register and she scans it then hands it back to them which in turn they hand it back to me and I put it back in my wallet and while I'm doing that she is ringing in the stuff!! I feel that this was one of the most asinine things ever. When it came time to pay I was surprised she didn't kick up a fuss about store policy when I pulled a debit card out of my wallet to pay for the stuff. I feel like this was just to waist time because like I said this never happened any other time we were in there.

but all in all we had a good time! it was nice to get away for the weekend and there is no doubt we'll be back to Halifax again probably during vacation time this summer if not before.

[sapphire-mage]

Another Really Fucked Up Dream I Had

cw: Unreality (This isn't a fic, this is a legit dream I had)

I just woke up from a really fucked up nightmare. If you know me, I never just have 'scary nightmares'. I gotta have creepy ass experiences that make me question reality.

I had a dream I was playing a horror video game. The dream created this vision that a lot of streamers that I enjoy had played and recommended this game to everyone. It started off almost like a Tomb Raider game in someone's mansion, but you're playing a detective played by Drew Barrymore (even though the graphics are VERY choppy). After some platforming and puzzles, you discover the body of the mansion's owner, with little knowledge of how she died.

The scene cuts to a segway, in which you find that the mansion owner's grandaughter has killed her mother, is implied to have killed her grandmother, and now kills Drew Barrymore's character, ending with her shrieking.

Game cuts to static.

Game suddenly returns, everything is greyscale, and you're now playing in the slums of an area, working with other men and women in hazmat-like suits. There are only two characters not wearing these suits: A creepy old guy dressed like a stuff animal, and a vertically challenged man who kinda functions as 'your boss'. Despite being your boss, the latter was incredibly kind to you, but it never shows me what became of him. But a lot of your co-workers are missing after going deeper down into the facility where you all work at. So you, the player, have to go down further.

The game functioned like most FP indie horror. It's a bit static-y like Signalis, but all the characters look like those jank 2D models that continuously face you as you rotate around them. Apparently, that's by design, as the game reveals that the co-workers you're looking for have become 'corrupt' by something they witnessed, and now they stalk you until they eventually decide to try and kill you.

I remember wandering the empty floors of the game for a while. Greyscale, no music, static and buzzing like sounds. Eventually, the game led to a final segment: The only survivors are yourself, your closest co-worker, and a woman. Although you can't see anyone's face (since they're all in hazmat suits), somehow you can sense the woman's eyes. And she really, REALLY likes looking at you, and you know it's because she wants to kill you.

Meanwhile, you're closest co-worker (a guy) is eyeing her, because he has the hots for her. And you're stucked in this panicked situation, because you just know, she's ready to kill you or him at any second. So, I drew first blood, and took her out before she could take me. My closest co-worker lost his shit and came after me, causing me to put him down as well. The game concludes implying that because I made these choices to end them, I was already corrupted and too far gone. All of us already were. The game ends...

And then the game starts again. I completely get the same vivid visuals of playing the opening segment of the game all over again, with the segments of playing as Drew Barrymore and her character dying and everything. After clearing it, it sends me back into the hazmat suit character again, and I mentally took a notice that I was repeating the game again. And I verbally thought to myself, "Yeah, this was a cool game. But I'm kinda done."

And then I woke up. I was sleeping upside down on my bed (feet at my pillows, head towards the bottom of the bed). I got up slowly, questioning the fact that that was just a dream. I was like, "No... That was a real game! Penny Parker recommended it, and everyone was talking about Jackscepticeye playing it. And it's name was..... GOD, what was the name of that game..."

I could never remember the name. I don't think my dream DID give it a name. It just made it feel so real.

I couldn't find my glasses around my bed, cause I left them in the bathroom. I sat around, looking around to make sure none of that was real. And that I wasn't going crazy from a similar horror plotline happening in real life.

And then, I came here to type this.

......MAN WHAT THE FUCK!?!

[gaymer-hag-stan]

On the 24th of November, twenty three years ago, the PlayStation 2 was released in Europe. Playing on it was among my favourite pastimes as a kid and I have many amazing and fond memories. To celebrate, I wanna share my favourite PS2 era games of all time. Not all of them are PS2 exclusives, in fact I think most of them aren't, but for me there were no other options honestly. I had no idea what a GameCube or an Xbox were until much later in life and PC gaming, due to my very old pc from the 90s, and due to thinking that you can only play with your mouse and keyboard, always looked inferior to me.

Now, most of these games on the following list I own, or owned, a few of them I had either borrowed from friends, played with said friends on their PS2, rented or only played demos of (until much later) and a very few of these games I actually played later on PS3 or PS4 remasters, but I decided to include them anyway because of all the fond memories I had, even if they were made in my teenage or young adult years, I think they still count lol

1. Tomb Raider: Legend - Tomb Raider is my favourite video game series ever and Lara Croft is my hero. It all started with Legend!

2. Tekken 5 - My love for fighting games probably started with this one. It was the very first fighting game I ever owned, possibly the very first I ever played too.

3. The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe - I fell in love with the world of Narnia when the respective movie came out and dove deep into the books and franchise as a whole. This was the very first PS2 game I ever purchased, before my dad would only get me the demos included in the official PlayStation magazine as he thought it was better value for money to get multiple games at once, even if it were just demos lol

4. Sly 3: Honour Among Thieves - This is probably the game I rented the most. It was during summer vacation styling at my uncle's place. My cousins also had a PS2 of their own and my uncle would take us to the video store after going to the beach and we would each rent a game. This was my choice, most of the time, until I finally beat it! It was among the first games I ever beat!

5. Sonic Heroes - I was obsessed with Sonic the Hedgehog as a kid. I still think very fondly of the series, but haven't kept up with it as much after Unleashed I think. Heroes will forever be my favourite because of how many of the series characters are to play with!

6. Jak X: Combat Racing - This was actually the first game I ever owned but, I didn't purchase it, I actually got my cousin to give it to me lol. I think it ignited my love for kart racing lol

7. Final Fantasy X - I remember trying a demo of it as a kid and thinking "Wtf is this, why do I select combat moves, why can't I move around this sucks"... So it wasn't until I was a young adult that I actually gave the franchise a fair chance and X is definitely among my favourites now.

8. Sonic Mega Collection Plus - This I included because of the retro games in general. Of course I spent hours playing this on my PS2 and then I gave it to my brother who still loves Sonic a lot. But before that, we used to have an old PC at Grandma's house in the countryside where we would spend summer vacation. So an older cousin had installed some sort of emulator featuring tons of old Sega games on that PC and me and my younger cousins would play hours upon hours of Sonic 1, 2 and 3 on it before eventually moving the party to PS2s in later years!

9. SoulCalibur III - This is peak SoulCalibur for me. I used to play the demo of it before eventually managing to get my hands on a copy of it during the PS2s later years (c. 2008-2010)

10. Tekken Tag Tournament - I remember a friend of my dad's gave away a bunch of old games he had to us, so I got this after Tekken 5 was already out, but I still loved getting to play as Jun or Kunimitsu or Forest or Michelle and I also loved playing Tekken Bowl. Even my mum, who doesn't really play video games, enjoyed playing Tekken Bowl with my brother!

11. Resident Evil 4 - Okay. This might sound weird but, until c. 2010 I had never ever heard of Resident Evil in general, I don't know how or why, and I never actually got to play any of them until I played Resident Evil 6 with a friend. By the time I had gotten my PS4, I had become very invested in the series and started trying to get my hands on as many of them as I could. Resident Evil 4 is definitely among my favourites so, even though it's cheating, I'm including it on my list.

12. LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures - Funnily enough, I never had any interest in LEGO, I was on team Playmobil, or Indiana Jones for that matter, I think I only became aware of who he is after the fourth movie was out and promo for it was everywhere. But when it came to LEGO video games, I had tons of fun playing demos of LEGO Star Wars (another franchise I did not and still don't care for) and LEGO Batman before it and I had tons of fun! So I decided to pick Indiana Jones up as the first full LEGO game I owned. I wouldn't necessarily call myself an Indiana Jones fan, but I got around to watching the first four movies multiple times, all because of this game!

13. Sly 2: Band of Thieves - This is another cheat, because I played this game through the PS3 collection remaster for the first time, but my love for the third game prompted me to include it on my list. And it's a great game on its own of course.

14. Tomb Raider: Anniversary - By the time Anniversary was out, my original fat PS2 had died so I asked for a new one, and guess which game was bundled with it! I only owned a demo version of Legend before that, so Anniversary was actually the first Tomb Raider game I owned, despite being the third one I played!

15. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. I got into my Harry Potter phase sometime between the release of the fourth and fifth movie. In between that time period I read all the books that were out at the time (were Deathly Hallows already out? I don't remember) and played as many of the games as I could get my hands on. Order of the Phoenix is my favourite book, movie and game of the series.

16. The Sims 2: Pets - I was debating between this and Castaway but I ultimately went with this. I know it's nowhere near comparable to the PC experience but I didn't know what Sims on the PC was all about at the time so I felt like this was the shit 🤣 it still has its own charm regardless

17. Ultimate Spider-Man - I was never big on comic book heroes. Batman and Spider-Man were probably the two solo exceptions. I guess it's no coincidence that these two get the best video games too! I haven't really bothered with the PS4 and PS5 games, played a little bit of the first one and didn't much care for it, but THIS one I really like!

18. Final Fantasy XII - Again, like with Final Fantasy X, this is a cheat, but I'm too invested in this game lol

19. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - While I much prefer Order of the Phoenix's free exploration of Hogwarts, I love that you can choose between Harry, Ron and Hermione in this one!

20. Shadow of the Colossus - I only owned a demo of this which ended after defeating Barbas so I never got to experience the whole thing until the COVID lockdowns when it was included as the free PS+ subscription game at one point or another and I finally got to play the whole thing! But even then, the little I had played as a kid was enough for it to be permanently engrained in my mind. I was so in awe by this game, still am.

21. Dead or Alive 2: Hardcore - Dead or Alive is my second favourite fighting game series after Tekken, and it's all mostly thanks to this game. Although I never actually owned it myself, a friend and then my cousins did so we would spend hours playing together either this or Tekken 5.

22. Sonic Riders - Again, only ever owned a demo of this. I did end up buying Zero Gravity, but there's something particular about this game's aesthetics that made me obsessed with it. The concept on its own still sounds so unbelievably cool to me and I wish Sega and Team Sonic would revive this sub-series some day! It's intro cinematic is the coolest shit ever.

23. SoulCalibur II - "Is that the one with Link in it?" No, because the GameCube does not exist silly, remember? I remember playing as Cassandra in the demo of II. The game is amazing, and I can see why many prefer it over SoulCalibur III, but to me it's the other way around. Still a great game though

24. Madagascar - I only ever played demos of it and rented it but never completed it. I did get the second one, but this was the shit. I vividly remember doing various tasks that would earn me pieces of a makeshift Statue of Liberty that the gang was making in hopes that someone would see the fire from the torch and come get them. I remember actually making drawings of castaway statue of liberty lol.

25. God of War II - I never cared much for excessive violence and gore or naked ladies but, greek mythology is right up my alley so this aspect of god of war always appealed to me. It's also why I don't care for the newer games as much; I appreciate that Kratos is no longer annoying and screaming but I got enough of my Norse fix from Skyrim and Valhalla, I really don't care to see any more of it. Also: Greek Mythology > Egyptian Mythology >>>>> Norse Mythology. I'm sorry it's the rules

[onewingedangels]

RISE OF THE TOMB RAIDER (2015) dev. Crystal Dynamics

[dyrwoodan]

,

[scarfacemarston]

Halloween with the Van Der Linde’s - Part Deux

This is part 2 of a Halloween post I did a while back. There are some lame memes of mine that reference part 1 but it’s of course not a necessity to read the first part. If you want to read it - here it is. Arthur - a pilot from Top Gun - he always thought it would be cool to fly and he loved the movie growing up. He thought about becoming a pilot himself as he loved freedom. However, he hated the idea of joining the air force and he didn’t want to be a commercial pilot.

Dutch and Molly - Molly *really* wants to do Bonnie and Clyde. Badly. So badly. Dutch thinks the idea is too basic. He thought about doing Elvis briefly. Finally, Dutch decided on King Henry VIII and Molly as a princess. Henry VIII was known for his romantic notions of courtly gentlemanly love and all things grand.......but is more famous for how his wives ended up and his politics. (No, that’s not commentary on Dutch but I suppose you could make an argument for some minor similarities). Molly’s dress is indeed based on the deleted Ball Gown dress.

Hosea- David Bowie 100%. He loved David Bowie for decades and since people have said he resembled David, he thought, why not?

John - Like every year, he didn’t want to dress up. He finally “forced himself” to choose a Yellowstone employee shirt....which then caused the family to goad him into adding pizass to his costume...which was a jacket and some spurs.

Abigail -Lara Croft, She watched the kids in one of her foster homes played Tomb Raider and she loved it. She always wanted to be like Lara. The only thing she changed was the shorts into longer pants.

”’My legs get cold, Gosh dang it!”

Sadie - She saw Pearson and Charles dress up like pirates last year and knew she could do a better job. You bet she’d be the most bad ass pirate queen you’ve ever seen....her epilogue outfit even looks like a pirate’s outfit. 

Charles - A Jedi and he’s comfortable as hell. He was a comfy pirate last year and intends to be comfty again. He almost convinces Arthur to join him, especially since “Jedi fly ships”. Star Wars gave Charles a lot of comfort growing up and he stills enjoys it through the ups an downs. Then Uncle appears....

Uncle -  is a Jedi, too doing bad Obi-Wan Kenobi impressions.......just to follow Charles around and annoy him.

 Sean, Lenny and Javier - the three Spider-Men so they can do the Spider-Men pointing meme....just with three Spider-men! Lenny’s back up was Marty McFly, Sean’s back up was Elton John and Javier’s back up was Legolas. Yes, I FIRMLY believe Javier is a “nerd” in the best of ways. 

Jack - wanted to be involved, but remembered he was spiderman last year and the year before that so now he’s decided he’s Batman. He was not allowed to watch the Robert Pattinson film, but he’s watched the Kevin Conroy original Batman the Animated Series and loved it.

Kieran - One of the classic Riddler styles, baby! He loves that Jack is Batman - the same version he grew up with. He tells lame riddles all night which annoys some of the gang members, but Jack has a ton of fun trying to figure them out.

Josiah Trelawny - lost a bet and did not get to pick his outfit. He was horrified until…….it was the ladies who picked it out. They picked out Dr. Stephen Strange.

Tilly, Karen and Mary-Beth - Charlie’s Angels. Mary-Beth wanted it last year and they didn’t do it so she INISTED this year. Note: I l literally do NOT know ANYTHING about Charlie’s Angels except that Farrah Fawcett was extremely famous because of it. If you know how to match characters to their personalities, go ahead!

Susan Grimshaw - Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland. It’s a fun costume with so many different interpretations so she gets to pick what pieces she wants.

Micah - the Joker Heath Ledger version because he likes doing the impressions. He is monitored around Jack. (Oops, didn’t know I had 3 batman characters on here. Sorry, but I think it works!)

Mr. Pearson - Bob’s Burger and people actually like it! 

Reverend Swanson - Gandalf. He has a rivalry with the “Star Wars nerds”, but it’s all in good fun.

Leopold Strauss - doesn’t dress up. He thinks it’s a waste of time. Some of the less festive gang members agree with him. However, he does hand out items like pencils which....is useful at least?

Bill - Freddy Kruger - but does not wear the mask around Jack and his sister. He wants to be able to choose when he’s scary and when he’s not...besides, the Marstons and co would kick his ass. (Jack would probably think it’s cool, though.) (Doing a collage image because watch someone report me for posting a horror costume lol I know people who have been reported for less.)

Rufus -  Jack and Abigail decide Rufus will use his good boyness for good and make up for John’s lack of celebration.

Amelia Marston - My name for Abigail and John’s daughter. Abigail and John want to raise a strong little lady so who better than a feminist icon like Rosie the Riveter? (To those who don’t know, Rosie the Riveter was a World War II propaganda figure who encouraged all women to work outside of the home for the war effort - usually in factories.

[doubleddenden]

We're 5 months into 2022 as of May 22nd. It's time for another look at just how fucked we are by checking in on

The Timeline

Elon Musk buys Twitter to own the libs. Wait actually he changes his mind. Maybe actually yes. Wait. What about all the bots? Maybe no. Lots of people are jumping ship

Eurovision happened. Something about banana wolves and pussy salad? Idk man, but Ukraine won

Square Enix sold a bunch of IPs for... NFTs. Like Deus Ex and Tomb Raider. For. NFTs.

BTW NFTs and crypto fell hard recently

BTW BTW, one of the biggest NFT guys behind those ugly monkeys tried to make a dating site for themselves, then called it off because of too many dudes

Speaking of dating, Dead By Daylight is making a dating sim called DBD Hooked on You, made by the same people that made the KFC dating sim. Now you can date your favorite serial killers and be the "I can fix him" girl you've always wanted to be

Chip n Dale Rescue Rangers came back in the weirdest possible way. Look aesthetics aside, I mean it when I say weird. Like Ugly Sonic makes an appearance weird. Like two characters got together that had no business getting together weird. Like Chip n Dale not sounding like Chip n Dale weird.

You know that bird that was in Lion King? Zazu? Yeah his species is going extinct. I thought it was a toucan or something but nah, thats a Yellow Billed Horn Bill, and climate change is wiping them out.

MCR is back- again! This time Measles didn't come with them

Unfortunately Monkeypox did. Yeah turns out it's was around before in 2003 or so, even 2021. Do some googling but try not to panic. There are treatments from the looks of things so we're already better off than we were with Covid, but educate yourselves on the matter to be safe, and don't brush off warnings.

Fairly Odd Parents has a live action Paramount+ series where Timmy leaves very 2d Cosmo and Wanda to some very not 2d and live kids when he goes off to college or something idk. Btw, Vicky works at the school now. Btw btw, Vicky has a crush on- go ahead and guess- no seriously try it you'll never get it- it's Crocker. Twitchy ass FAIRY god PARENTS ass ear on his neck ass Crocker. Yeah she was 16 during the regular show and he was still middle aged and yes this did come out of nowhere, why do you ask?

Digimon Survive survived development hell and is actually coming out in like 2 months, and seems like it might be a VN with Tactical RPG elements and a karma system- oh and teens will probably die, most definitely

Avatar actually put out a trailer for its new movie. No no not the fun one with the bald kid or buff tomboy- the one with blue people that have sex with their hair

Warner Bros really weren't joking when they decided to make a co-op Smash clone of characters like Batman, Arya Stark, Jake the Dog, and Ultra Instinct Shaggy. It's real. I swear I saw it. I stg Batman and UI Shaggy really fought against Bugs Bunny and fucking Arya Stark. I wish I was lying.

Kingdom Hearts 4 is announced, and Sora has gone down from a size 32 clown shoe to a size 13 as he steps into the most disturbingly realistic world in the franchise yet.

Oh and this was a couple of months back, but Robert Pattison and Zoë Kravitz were interviewed by a Vtuber named LaPlus (La+?) Darkness from the Japanese side of Hololive, where she asked him how he used the bathroom in the Batman suit, and he gave a fun answer. He actually looked happy

And to end it on a somewhat bittersweet note. Scrat finally got the nut. That fucked up squirrel from Ice Age that caused several natural disasters, broke the laws of physics, broke EARTH- he finally. Finally got his nut. His struggle is over.

Until we meet again

[pixelgrotto]

Indy's Greatest Adventures

I rewatched all of the Indiana Jones movies lately, coincidentally just in time for the trailer of the new one, Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny. After I replayed Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis last year and realized that Indy was way more of a tomb raider than I remembered him to be, I was a little nervous about revisiting these films. I needn't have worried too much - wonky portrayal of India aside, the movies still hold up well. There are colonial overtones if you bother to analyze things with a 2022 mindset, sure, but the truck chase scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark still has to be one of the best sequences I've ever seen on film. The same goes for the mine carts in Temple of Doom and the tank scene in Last Crusade. Even Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which I tolerate more than most, has a few moments of pulpy goodness, nuclear fridges aside.

This brings me to Indiana Jones' Greatest Adventures for the Super Nintendo, one of the few video games that decided to capture the magic of all of Dr. Jones' then-current films. I first saw a screenshot of it as a kid in Issue #9 of The Adventurer, a magazine that LucasArts put out to advertise their products, and I thought it looked neat as hell. A game full of levels inspired by all three Indy movies?! Genius! I never actually played it as a child, since I didn't have a SNES growing up, but the concept stuck with me. And so after I finished watching the films I decided to give Greatest Adventures a whirl, since it's easily accessible by emulation these days.

The game, published by LucasArts but developed by Factor 5 and JVC Musical Industries, runs on the same engine as JVC's three Super Star Wars titles. I haven't played those, but a quick look online shows that they're renowned for being hard as hell and featuring levels that take quite a few liberties from what was in the movies. (Remember how Luke had to go toe-to-toe against a Sarlacc pit monster in the beginning of A New Hope?)

Greatest Adventures doesn't stray quite as far from the source material, though the last boss of the game is a goofy skeleton version of Donovan after he drinks from the wrong Holy Grail. For the most part, though, you've got traditional platforming stages inspired by most of the major moments in each film, like Indy exploring the Well of Souls, beating up Thuggees in the tunnels beneath Pankot Palace, and facing the traps leading up to the resting place of the Holy Grail. Every now and then you'll get a level that expands upon something not really seen in the films - for instance, a snow section that shows Indy in Nepal trying to reach Marion's bar. Then there are what I like to call "gimmick" levels that present you with a key moment from the movies, like Indy running from a giant boulder at the beginning of Raiders or avoiding gunshots in a nightclub in Temple of Doom, and these break up the standard platforming by forcing you to run forward to survive or duck behind cover. Finally, there are three levels that take advantage of the SNES' fancy Mode 7 chip, placing you in a 3D perspective. Temple of Doom gets two of these, mimicking the life raft plane jump in the Himalayas and the mine cart chase. Last Crusade gets the final one, presenting the moment when Indy and his dad escaped a zeppelin via biplane and had to shoot down some Nazis.

It's all standard SNES platforming goodness, though the game is pretty darn hard. Indy controls well (though for some reason his whip is a far better weapon than his gun) but as the game ramps up you can expect to find a lot of inconveniently placed enemies (like birds, a la Ninja Gaiden) designed to trip up your jumps and bleed your health meter. The latter Last Crusade levels in particular start putting you up against Nazi mechanics and guys from the Brotherhood of the Cruciform Sword who can throw wrenches and knives in a perfect arc that always seems to hit you, and it's a fine recipe for frustration. There's also one level where you've got to swing from your whip between the windows of Castle Brunwald, and man is it kind of impossible.

I also wish there was more of an equal distribution of levels between the three movies, since Raiders gets 12 stages while Temple of Doom and Last Crusade only get 8. Also, I would've liked to see Indy's sidekicks present. Greatest Adventures depicts the story of each film as kind of a streamlined alternate take where Indy's alone all the time, and while Marion and Professor Jones Sr. show up in cutscenes (and notably the Game Over screen), others like Short Round and Willie Scott are nowhere to be seen. Willie, I guess I can do without, but not including Short Round is a crime, especially when they could've easily designed a Mode 7 chase scene with him driving a car as Indy escapes Shanghai.

These quibbles aside, playing Greatest Adventures with save states neutralizes a lot of the frustration, and for an Indy fan, there's much to like here - from the lovingly-recreated John Williams score to the occasional stage that really rewards fans of the movies. For instance, Raiders' infamous swordsman in black shows up at the end of the game's Cairo levels, and instead of proving to be a major boss encounter, all you've got to do is shoot him once to move on, just like in the film. There's also a Last Crusade boss battle aboard a tank where you can't use any other weapons but your fists to punch Colonel Ernst Vogel into submission, and you've got to do it before the tank rolls off a cliff, too. Good attention to film detail there!

The era of licensed video game tie-ins for films is more or less over, so I doubt we'll see anything in the form of electronic entertainment when Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny comes out. (Bethesda does have the Indy license and is supposed to deliver an original game that might coincide with the movie's release, but they've been silent on that front for a year, so we'll see what happens.) With this in mind, I do recommend giving Greatest Adventures a run-through if you've got a high tolerance for old-school platforming or at least want to relive Indy's glory days before the new movie releases. Along with Fate of Atlantis, it's probably the only 2D Indy game worth replaying by today's standards.